#shen yuan fic
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Hear my random thought, imagine that the PIDW fandom actually start noticing the weirdo called Peerless Cucumber and they find his comments absolutely hilarious, like “this dude is crazy but hes damn funny too” and they just start teasing him with things like “what are you, Luo Binghe’s wife to defend him like this?” until someone actually makes a full 20.000 word fanfiction about peerless cucumber dying and reincarnating in PIDW and ending up rizzing up Luo Binghe, convincing him to leave his harem for him and they marry and live happily ever after and everyone finds this EVEN MORE HILARIOUS and more people start writing fanfic about it.
Before PIDW ends, the ship tag is one of the top 5 of the fandom in ao3 and they have tons of fanart and even an animation video on youtube that has hundreds of thousands of views and obviously airplane had seen it, and he found it hilarious too.
So when he finished PIDW he made some specials and he decided to be the funniest man ever and write one where peerless cucumber died and reincarnated in a male demon whom happened to be working close to Luo Binghe, and that was the first and last gay chapter of PIDW.
The fandom EXPLODED when they read this and the ship tag quickly became number 1 on the fandom in ao3, fanfiction.net, wattpad and tumblr.
Sadly, peerless cucumber stopped his activities on social media as soon as the final chapter of PIDW dropped, wonder what happened to that guy...
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it is currently 3am, no one can judge me for this thanks goodbye
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insert super cool caption here
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scumbag system#fanart#shen qingqiu#sqq#shen yuan#shen jiu#I'm so writing a fic about them y'all just wait#does this count as scumcum?
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Non transmitigation au where Shen Yuan auditions for a part in PIDW on a lark when it gets a live action adaptation, not thinking he’ll actually get a part (he just wanted to be able to say he did it okay? He was dated okay??! He was not dared he just thought it’d be neat, but he’ll admit to nothing.) and, much to his horror, ends up cast as Shen Qingqiu.
He somehow accidentally makes Shen Qingqiu so likable that he’s the most popular character. The fandom goes feral over him. He becomes famous. New fans are joining the bandwagon in droves to watch him.
And all the while, Shen Yuan is frantically trying to pretend he isn’t the most notorious anti fan troll to clown on the internet. He has never heard of PIDW before what do you mean Peerless Cucumber whomst?
#I just think it’d be really really funny to watch Shen Yuan flounder trying to act like he doesn’t know anything about pidw at all#he has a thin face okay#somehow airplane finds out and is lording it over his head#we’ll reconvene on the topic another time tho it just needs to be out of my drafts at this point or it’ll grow mold and mushrooms#mxtx fandom#svsss au#svsss#mxtx svsss#svsss fanfiction#svsss fic#svsss shen yuan#sqq svsss#svsss shen qingqiu#svsss shitpost#scumbag system#scum villain's self saving system#scum villain self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#pidw#proud immortal demon way#mxtx hell#original shen qingqiu#shen jiu#peerless cucumber
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Hi I'm still alive btw have some disciple ver. bingyuan
found little binghe in the woodshed with a ruined hand :(
#I am Gludgenbell and you'll never see me draw the same design twice apparently#literally the next drawing to finish is a different version of shen yuan#also I am a believer that sy would totally heal people left and right if he found out how to do it#he's a protector hes a mother hes a defender#yes I did read sy qian cao fics again and I think theyre RIGHT HE WOULD HEAL YOU#if you happen to be a problematic man in pidw anyway#okay real tag time lol#art#my art#<- i always forget this tag smh#digital art#svsss#scum villian self saving system#bingyuan#luo binghe#shen yuan
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When Shen Yuan transmigrates in his definitely-not-favorite novel, he’s ecstatic. Sure, dying sucked, but he got a second chance! In a body that looked exactly like his, only healthy and with a perfectly good golden core, too!
He’s a rouge cultivator now, with a cool sword, enough money, long-ass hair and zero actual responsibilities!
So, all in all, Shen Yuan hit a jackpot. He travels, makes notes of monsters he sees and sometimes fights, collects rare herbs and flowers and feels just great.
He feels decidedly less great, when after defeating a Six Eyed Spider Viper in some nameless, remote village, he receives a bride as a payment. It shockes him into a stupor for long enough for the villagers to think he actually agreed, so as soon as he can talk again, he blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind:
“This one is already married!”
It doesn’t work as well as he hoped.
“So Nie Rong can be a second wife.” An auntie, possibly Nie Rong’s mother, waves her hand dismissively at him.
“No, no,” Shen Yuan scrambles. “This one wasn’t being clear enough. This one is not in position to take wives! He is- is, uh.”
“Master is a wife?” Nie Rong chrips, her cheeks reddened.
“Uh. Sure. Yeah.” Shen Yuan would like to leave the village immediately. A thrill of defeating a cool fucking monster wasn’t even worth the embarrassment!
“Master’s husband must be quite powerful to get such a cultivator as a wife.” One of the villagers says, eyes glinting with suspicion. “Who’s he?”
“This one’s husband is indeed very powerful.” Shen Yuan squeezes out of himself, taking a step back. “Very possessive, too.”
“How come he lets his husband travel so far?”
“Oh! It’s easy, really. This one’s husband’s harem is big enough to slip away for a week or two!”
An agitated murmur passes through the small crowd. Shen Yuan sighs, feeling the control of the situation slipping through his fingers.
“He doesn’t sound like a very good husband.” One of the aunties says. “Maybe you should divorce him and marry our Rong-er after all.”
“This one’s husband is not someone one just divorces.” Shen Yuan takes another step back. “Thanking everyone for kind words, but-"
“Oh.” Nie Rong says, eyes downcast. “It’s the Emperor, isn’t it? That’s why Daozhang can’t leave?”
“Yes!” Shen Yuan yelps before he can really think. “So you can see how the situation is difficult for this one.”
It’s a shit solution to a problem. Might be the worst, actually. But then again, Luo Binghe would never know and Shen Yuan gets a perfect excuse if something similar ever happens again.
And it does happen. Quite too often, if Shen Yuan is honest — shouldn’t all the girls belong to the protagonist anyway?!
So, Shen Yuan uses his perfect excuse: No, he cannot marry your pretty little daughter, he’s an Emperor Luo’s husband. And: No, fellow rouge cultivator, he will not share your bed, he’s spoken for!
Everything works without a hitch, until one day Shen Yuan walks into an inn where he’s been staying for last couple of days and comes face to face with the Emperor of Combined Realms, Lord Luo himself.
Shit.
#oops!!#is that fun?#do we want a second part?#lmk!#svsss#shen yuan#luo binghe#svsss ficlet#svsss fic rec#svsss au#svsss fanfiction#bingqiu
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You know, I’d love to write a fic where Shen Yuan reverse-transmigrates back to the modern world, into his comatose body, and Binghe makes the absolute, most unhinged, crazy-stalker-girlfriend impression on his family trying to get him back.
Luo Binghe; My husband has been kidnapped from me to a strange world and is being held in a cursed sleep by strangers!!!!
Shen Yuan’s family: Jesus fucking Christ this lunatic keeps trying to break into the hospital room and assaulting people while screaming that we are keeping him away from his beloved wife! Where the fuck does A-Yuan pick up these people!
(Because I refuse to believe with my whole heart that Shen Yuan hasn’t always had his wifebeam. He just previously had two rich and powerful older brothers, two protective parents, and a very observant little sister beating them back with sticks.)
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scum villain#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#SQQ#Luo Binghe#LBH#Bingqiu#post-canon#reverse transmigration#fic idea
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I had trouble finding the right words to describe what exactly I like in SY and SJ until now
So, my favorite Shen dynamics:
Alternatively:
#i think sy actually could be good at plotting when he doesn't try??? Like when he doesn't intend to do it if it makes sense#But generally it's planning to do one thing and then ending with a completely different result than expected#but pretending it was all according to keikaku#I like the idea that yes they are playing mind games but the fact it's completely different is so goddamn hilarious#Sj making hard maneuvers with figures#meanwhile sy is just bluffing and raising bets#jiuyuan#shen jiu#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#shen twins#svsss#scum villian self saving system#scum villain#scumbag self saving system#scumcum#Can't believe it's actually a name ???#i need fic recs btw so...
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cumplane o’ cumplane
#cumplane#shang qinghua#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#svsss#svsss fanart#can i get another fic of them hooking up irl i eat them like candy#i also love fics of them fucking around in the abyss era#airplane gets a hairclip because ive been doing that lately
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svsss omegaverse au where only those with profound cultivation ability develop into alphas or omegas. this means both powerful spiritual cultivators and powerful demon lines
under luo binghe’s rule, any alpha or omega in the general populace is brought to bingge’s palace. omega women are added to the harem without question, tho there are a notable few alpha women there as well (shl and lmy).
sy transmigrates into a wandering omega cultivator exploring the world (the world building was the best part of that dumbfuck novel and now he gets to experience it firsthand!!!). his exploration quickly takes him from the few safe remaining human cities and into the wider world.
he’s chased for days by different demon groups until one finally catches him, because junshang’s been hell-bent on finding some particular male omega for the past few months. he’s put out a bounty and everything; whoever brings the right omega gets riches and their choice of one treasure from junshang’s vault.
everyone thinks he’s gonna kill this dude. they assume the omega wronged junshang somehow and he wants revenge. sy is scared absolutely shitless. these guys tie him up in immortal binding cables and beat him up a little bit. by the time they make it to the underground palace, sy looks fuckin rough
and surprisingly, lord luo is not pleased by this. so displeased, in fact, that he cuts the demons down right there in the middle of his reception hall? sy is 100% sure he’s gonna be next and he nearly passes out when bingge approaches. (part of him is screaming because!!!! luo binghe!!! in the flesh!!!!! with an air of power and deadly beauty and strength!!!! the protagonist!!!)
lbg studies sy’s face for a minute, then has servants take him away. he’s bathed (THOROUGHLY!! maybe TOO thoroughly!!! he can wash his own ass!! thank you!!) and styled, and with the cables removed he can finally heal his injuries from being captured.
the next time they meet, lbg seems weirdly angry. his hands are shaking and his face is red, and every time he makes eye contact with sy, he growls and looks sharply away. he’s definitely barely holding back from killing sy!! maybe it’s because sy left the human cities? maybe it’s because he was poking around somewhere off-limits?? sy has no idea what he did.
lbg leads him down down to the water prison, and again sy almost passes out. my mans definitely pukes into the water just from the smell alone. it’s…a gory scene. but what’s most unsettling about it isn’t the emptiness in sqq’s eyes or the desperate grunting that only becomes louder the closer lbg brings sy.
what’s most unsettling is how similar they look. they could be brothers, their family resemblance is powerful. same face shape, same nose, same cheekbones.
and sy gets it then. bingge is done playing with sqq; there’s nothing really left to do to him (though he’s still got his dick…sy was one of the loudest proponents of cutting it off for what he did to ning yingying!) so lbg must be looking for a replacement.
lbg studies them both for a long time, as if cataloguing all the similarities between their faces. the whole time, sy is shaking, trying not to fall over. eventually, lbg must be satisfied, because he looks sy up and down slowly before muttering. ‘you’ll do for now. we can see how you measure up.’
POORLY!!! shen yuan is determined to measure up extremely poorly to that old shizun of lbg’s!! to save his own skin, he’ll be nothing like that asshole!!
thus begins shen yuan’s plan to treat the emperor with such doting, kind respect that he’ll see nothing of sqq in him beyond his unfortunate face!! surely lord luo won’t want to kill someone so kind to him!!
(every measure of shen yuan’s kindness is overwhelming to lbg. after so long he’s found what that other him flaunted in his face. a close relative of his shizun’s, no doubt, (maybe a twin separated at birth?) who became that other binghe’s shizun in that timeline. he’s kind and gentle and so concerned with binghe’s wellbeing in a way…no one has since his mother, so so long ago. that one morning with the other shizun was so sweet, but this—having this omega here in his palace, fussing at him to eat more and dress more warmly when he goes to the north, smiling unrestrained, smelling so impossibly sweet—this is so much better than he could have imagined. luo bingge will convince this shen yuan to be his omega. not as a concubine, but as a proper wife. first wife, maybe. empress, even. whatever it takes to get him to say yes. whatever it takes to keep him.)
#that spiraled out of control lmao#lbg truly just took sy down to compare their faces#forgot that seeing sqq like that might be upsetting for someone so lovely as sy#omega consort shen yuan#luo binghe#shen yuan#luo bingge#binggeyuan#svsss#svsss au#svsss fanfiction#svsss fic#svsss omegaverse#omegaverse svsss#alpha luo binghe#alpha luo bingge#omega shen yuan#omega shen qingqiu#scum villain au#scum villain’s self saving system#scum villains self saving system#scumbag system#ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong#人渣反派自救系统
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Locked & Loaded - Chapter 20: Childish War
Can't believe I've been writing this for almost a year now
#trigger warning: blood#trigger warning: sh#digital art#ao3 fanfic#art#fanfic#svsss#artists on tumblr#locked and loaded fic#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#zhuzhi lang#scum villain#svsss fanart
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Ghostfire Shen Yuan loyally following the lonely, undying, forgotten Luo Binghe from the original outline.
They never even met.
Shen Yuan had died long before Luo Binghe’s story was set to start. Abandoned by his System, he was left wandering the realms, searching for anything to latch onto, anything to stave off the darkness encroaching on his consciousness whenever he stopped. He keeps himself entertained with little jokes and references that will never reach anyone. At least back home, there were other people on the opposite side of his screen reacting, seeing. Paying attention.
He never would have thought he’d miss the times he was perceived by others. He’d give anything, though. Anything.
He stumbles upon the protagonist as he’s ascending the stairs of Cang Qiong Mountain Sect for the first time. Dressed in rags and heaving with the effort, Luo Binghe is exactly as Shen Yuan had pictured: a little bun, soft and kind and so very brave.
The excitement wears off soon enough. When the tea ceremony is held, Shen Yuan watches, hopelessly trying to stop the cup from hitting Binghe’s head. He lunges at Shen Jiu; let him be identified and exorcised, at least he would have done something with himself, however useless. It doesn’t work. Of course not—nothing can come between Luo Binghe and his fate.
Shen Yuan thinks about leaving. Many times. But every time he considers the possibility of going back to wandering the world, or just passing on… Well. There’s still a lot to see, isn’t there? It will get better. It will.
Only, it doesn’t. Not really.
There’s no harem; there’s no warm comfort offered to Luo Binghe by a sympathetic beauty, no wedding celebrations, no moments of gentle companionship, however brief, however superficial. There’s no camaraderie with his demon underlings, his generals, his allies; it’s all casual cruelty and dismissals, before it’s violence and subjugation.
There’s no joy. There’s no hope. There’s no ‘better’.
Something is wrong, that’s clear. Something is wrong, and Shen Yuan has no one to blame.
This is not the Proud Immortal Demon Way he knows.
Centuries later, when Luo Binghe begs for the heavens to allow him to die, Shen Yuan hears. When Luo Binghe rages against the passage of time, alone in the wreckage of his palace, left behind by everyone he’d ever known, Shen Yuan accompanies him. When Luo Binghe lies down in the Holy Mausoleum and refuses to get up, Shen Yuan waits, as he had for centuries, until Luo Binghe opens his eyes again and takes to the road.
They end up in a hidden realm so filled with Yin energy that Shen Yuan can channel it to manipulate his form into that of his former body. It’s not detectable by the living, but it’s there. He feels stronger, too. He can walk, float, fly, interact with what few other ghosts they encounter.
Still, Luo Binghe cannot see him.
Luo Binghe doesn’t talk much. Well, that makes sense, he was never in the habit of talking to himself, but still. It’s lonely.
They end up in a town where a diviner takes one look at Luo Binghe and offers him a free reading. Shen Yuan can’t enter her tent, well-warded against foreign entities as it is, so he waits outside.
She tells Luo Binghe of the little hanger-on he’s got. A powerful one, too, though he’s still getting used to his powers. He’s been here for a long time, she says. Since he was a child. He comes from far away—farther than even the most distant star.
Luo Binghe begins talking to him. Shen Yuan isn’t sure why, but he’s not complaining!
Luo Binghe also begins meditating again, trying to soothe the damage done by Xin Mo over the centuries. For every meal, he places a few fruits or snacks across from him on a plate he’d made himself, which he eats only after finishing his own dish. He makes space by his side whenever he walks on a narrow road. He stops at every landmark and tells stories about them, always starting the same way.
“Do you remember when…” becomes Shen Yuan’s favourite phrase.
One night, Luo Binghe sighs and looks across the table. Shen Yuan places himself so that he’s in Luo Binghe’s focus.
“What is it, Binghe?”
Luo Binghe doesn’t answer him, of course. Still, it feels like a conversation, when he says:
“I wish I knew your name.”
Shen Yuan frets. He’s been trying to manipulate the physical world, but he never got the hang of it. He’d tried drawing in sand, with water, just pushing things off shelves. And yet, nothing.
“I’m sorry, I wish—” he tries, but Luo Binghe is already talking again.
“I wonder if we ever crossed paths when you were alive.” He’s expressed this thought more than once. Shen Yuan never likes to think about how they’ve missed each other, how they’d been set up for failure from the start. “I wonder if we would have been friends.”
Shen Yuan scoffs. Of course not. Him and the protagonist? No way.
But—those cold star eyes, blindly searching for him, trying to land on him… They make him want to say, I would have liked that.
He reaches a hand out to touch Luo Binghe’s forehead. He’s taken to doing it whenever Luo Binghe broods, or makes a silly joke Shen Yuan wishes he didn’t find funny. It’s soothing.
He wishes Binghe could feel it.
When his finger touches the demon mark, it blazes. Luo Binghe gasps, that heavy gaze settling on Shen Yuan’s face.
Shen Yuan startles, and jumps away.
“No! Wait!”
Shen Yuan hesitates. Luo Binghe is looking around himself, eyes begging for even a wisp of Shen Yuan’s shadow.
He can’t deny Luo Binghe this.
He can’t deny himself this.
He reaches out again. This time, he cups Luo Binghe’s cheeks. When those eyes clear of panic and widen in awe, he whispers, softly, “Shen Yuan. My name is Shen Yuan.”
Luo Binghe looks like he’s been handed a treasure so precious he’s afraid to touch it. He hesitates, raising his hands in careful starts and stops, before taking Shen Yuan’s face in them, gently caressing the soft, cold skin of his face. His eyes dance with the haste he takes in memorising Shen Yuan’s features.
Then, he smiles. Helpless and weak and so, so precious. Shen Yuan has not seen hope so bright in Luo Binghe’s face since that fateful day on Cang Qiong Mountain.
“Hello, Shen Yuan.”
#svsss#svsss fic#luo binghe#bingyuan#shen yuan#bing-xiong#lbx#i DONT know what the fuck this is#im so exhausted. i am not in the right writing mindse#but please. please ponder this with me im begging so much#ignore every spotty grammar instance. im waving the ESL flag like its a shield#luo bing-xiong PLEASE tell me ur secreta#.txt#loyal ghost au
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Wei Qingwei from Shen Yuan of No Relation by @grubus not really sure whats going on with his fit i gave up
this fic is making me want to draw again :'D MQF next!!
#shen yuan of no relation#scumbag self saving system#svsss#art for fic#i have not touched tumblr in 3 years im so lost
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So I was rereading chapter 37 of Shen Yuan of No Relation by @grubus and I realized something. SQQ did exactly what YQY threatened to do years ago and then some.
What an over achiever.
#For some damn reason it made me think of this meme so I just had to.#nearly 20 years of reading fan fic and my first fanart is a fucking meme reference#honestly on brand for me tho#today I found out ms paint has changed a bit since I last used it#this took way longer than it should have#svsss#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#scumbag self saving system#fanart#my art#meme#shen yuan of no relation#syonr#svsss fanart#mxtx svsss#syonr spoilers#spoilers
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Okay okay okay.. but listen. What if Shen Yuan had a harsher System and was forced to convincingly play Shen Qingqiu, making Luo Binghe detest his existence, but when Luo Binghe returns from the abyss to enact his revenge and has Shen Qingqiu on trial at Huan Hua, unfortunately for everyone (and fortunately for us), they drug Shen Qingqiu with truth serum and accidentally spiral Shen Yuan into fanboy rampage of epic proportions about how great Luo Binghe is.
#I imagine a very confused lbh is like ‘if you liked me that much wtf did you treat me so bad’ and sy is like ‘have you ever told god no?’#truth serum makes sy blame everything on an unspecified god#idk it just sounds like it could make for entertaining crack treated seriously#I’m sure his rant is an exemplary example of peerless cucumbers legacy#svsss au#mxtx svsss#sqq svsss#svsss#svsss fanfiction#svsss fic#svsss luo binghe#svsss shen qingqiu#svsss shen yuan#svsss shitpost#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#scum villain self saving system#scum villain's self saving system#scumbag self saving system#scumbag system#luo binghe#luo bingge#mxtx hell#mxtx fandom#mxtx fanfic#bingqiu#bingqiu fanfic#peerless cucumber#danmei#danmei fandom
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something that bothers me just a little bit is how much the svsss fandom plays up the "beef" between sqq and sqh.... sqq is like. a bit mean. as banter!! by the end of the story it's more For The Bit than because of any genuine "hatred". sqq doesn't insult sqh every time they meet and he isn't always denying their friendship (if anything it's the other way around lol, see chapter 14). he isn't constantly agressively beating him with his fan. afaik he only actually beats him up one time - in chapter 21, after the shen jiu thing and after sqh teases him about regret of chunshan. sqq doesn't bully sqh and sqh really isn't the pathetic wet hamster people think he is :(
#nothing makes me close a fic faster than when people write cumplane wrong ..#when sqq/sy constantly calls sqh a hack author/rat/bastard .. zzzzzzzzzz#svsss#sqq#sy#sqh#cumplane#shang qinghua#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#miao#meta yapping
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system wardrobe malfunctions and small scenario pushers: exteme edition au
after his qi deviation, shen qingqiu starts working on slowly building up relations with his fellow peak lords and disciples; saving liu qingge in the caves, spoiling luo binghe rotten, freely praising his students, inviting the sect leader over for tea, he's a whole new person!
and yet... his friendliness levels aren't going up.
he knows it's a bit icky to judge his relations with other people based on numbers an alien entity is giving him, but he needs them to survive, and he swears that once he's above a certain threshold (somewhere between "civil" and "friendly", he figures), he will mute every and all notifications regarding it.
but they're just not going up. since his deviation he's at least managed to claw his way from "hostile" to "tolerant" with most of them, but some are somehow still stuck in the "aloof" section! they wouldn't even care if he died!
he just doesn't know what he's doing wrong; he understands these things take time, but it feels so bad when people refuse to sit next to him or sigh when they're assigned a mission with him, especially since it's not his fault.
now, it so happens that, one day, the system hears his woes and takes pity on him.
【 user seems to experience difficulty increasing character favor levels 】
you could say that
【 would host like to utilize our special deluxe package to activate 'The Path of Blossoming Hearts and Unspoken Affections' free of charge? ₊˚⊹♡ 】
though shen qingqiu isn't trustful of the system's antics, he can't deny that so far they have helped him well enough, and since it's free of charge with no penalties, wouldn't it be a waste not to use it? the title is a bit dubious, but was the original shen qingqiu not known for his frozen heart? for never sparing a single nice word to anyone? this could be his chance to let it blossom without the system nagging on his characterization.
【 accept optional mission? [yes]/[no] 】
he picks [yes].
two weeks later, he wishes he hadn't.
the package is devided into small scenarios that mostly appear at random, ranging from small dialogue challenges where he has to pick the right option (he really doesn't like those, the dehumanization of it makes his skin crawl), to the equivalent of two rivals getting locked in a room together.
the first few scenarios are minor and not very impactful, to the point where he's finished three of them and his favor count with qi qingqi has increased a whopping +2 (still "aloof") and that of wei qingwei +5 (still "tolerant").
his fourth scenario, however, reminds him of exactly why he should never accept gifts from strange screens floating in the sky.
he's on a nighthunt with liu qingge to slay a mirebeast that's been terrorizing travelers—an amphibious creature with thick, slimy skin, a crocodile tail and a leech-like mouth that shoots mucus when threatened... and shooting mucus it did.
while his clothes can easily be cleaned with a cleaning talisman, he never feels truly clean himself unless he actually bathes. luckily, there's a beautiful, glass-like pond nearby that's surrounded by natural demonic-repellent vegetation, a win! he's just draped his clothes over a nearby branch and submerged himself in the water, when the system rings out.
【 heads up! small scenario "Stolen Silks and Sunlit Waters" is about to begin! penalty: none. wishing user good luck (˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶) 】
hold up—stolen what.
stolen silks. his silks. stolen by a mossy-jade stag that happens to scratch its huge antles on the exact tree he hung his clothes on, which rattles the branch and causes his robes to fall exactly onto its head, spooking it into a gallop as it disappears into the forest.
how. how does that even happen.
shen qingqiu is just about to get out of the water when of course liu qingge chooses that exact moment to stomp into the glade looking for him, even though he should have been miles away to the village to ensure the people the beast is dead.
for anyone looking in from the outside, it's not a bad picture: shen qingqiu, with his hair pulled up and away from his slender neck, submerged to his (very bare!) pale shoulders in golden sunlit waters, surrounded by lotus flowers and lily pads. to liu qingge, this must be a terrible view, apparently—shen qingqiu can think of no other reason that would cause his face to flush so bright red.
liu qingge tosses his outer robe on the grass between them and turns resolutely around. it's only a bit insulting—is shen qingqiu not pretty enough to try and sneak a look at? even just a glimpse? meanwhile liu qingge is trying really hard to mentally recite the ethics sutra to not fixate on the sound of shen qingqiu getting out of the water (naked!!) or the rustle of fabrics as he wraps liu qingge's robe around his (naked!!!!) body. when liu qingge turns around he flushes an even darker shade as he sees shen qingqiu's bare legs and feet sticking out from under the robes.
"thanking shidi," says shen qingqiu, who notices none of this, as he pulls the robe a little closer around him, "for coming to this one's untimely rescue."
liu qingge grunts, turns, and walks away.
【 congratulations! liu qingge's favor increased. character satisfaction points +50. please continue to work hard! 】
shut up
【 ૮(˶╥︿╥)ა 】
they return to the sect victorious, but very embarrassed. the mirebeast gets all the blame. where his clothes are? well—uh, gone. the mucus dissolved them. yes he knows that's not how mucus works but it did this time okay?!!
yue qingyuan acts a bit strange seeing shen qingqiu wearing liu qingge's outer robes. he almost qi deviates when he finds out his shidi is wearing absolutely nothing under it. it's all very dramatic. apparently the sect is made up of people who shower with their clothes on or something.
【 ⁺‧₊˚bonus scenario!!˚₊‧⁺˖ interactive dialog quest: pick the best suited options to win additional favor points! 】
i don't like where this is going
"shidi?" yue qingyuan asks, looking at him with those big worried puppy eyes.
【 choice A: (demure) this shidi is cold. will you not invite me in at least?
choice B: what are you looking at?! mind your own business stupid old man!
choice C: i'm in love with liu qingge 】
WHAT
if he was drinking tea he would have spat it out, and then coughed himself to death. what the hell kind of options are these!!
【 system has based these options on what will earn (or lose!) user the most points. please pick one. 】
[ admin notes: option A will earn +60 points. option B will neither increase nor decrease points. option C will decrease -100 satisfaction points and increase +200 heartbreak points ]
shen qingqiu silently curses the system. option B is way out of line, even for the original shen qingqiu, who probably would insult yue qingyuan, but not with so little class. he doesn't even consider option C an actual option. and, well, he is cold. and wet. and almost naked. he would like a warm bath and some clothes. A it is then.
he doesn't like the way yue qingyuan's face light up when he grits out the dialog.
【 congratulations! yue qingyuan's favor increased. character satisfaction points +60! keep up the good work! 】
he can't keep doing this much longer.
unfortunately, he does have to keep doing this for much longer.
he's just about to go to bed when someone knocks on the door. luo binghe is already sleeping so he goes himself. just as he's about to open the door the system rings out—but it's too late.
shen yuan is used to wearing old tshirts to bed and no pants (he hates the feeling of his legs being restricted while he sleeps), so he doesn't really care when the only equivalent of this in pidw is a silk nightgown. his mother wore them, his sister wore them. hell, one of his brothers once bought one for fun and ended up using it for months. it's florally embroidered with puffy sleeves and reaches to his knees, that's decent enough, right?
【 heads up! small scenario "Dreamy Encounters at Dusk" is about to begin! good luck! 】
he has no idea what that's supposed to mean and he doesn't care. he opens the door, and it's mu qingfang. not... that unusual, but still.
"can this master help you?"
it takes mu qingfang a moment to remember what he's here for, it seems, because he stares at shen qingqiu for a good few seconds before raising an eyebrow like he's caught him doing something wrong.
"does shen-shixiong always answer the door like this?"
shen qingqiu glares back. "only when unsolicited guests come stumbling around my porch in the middle of the night."
"fair enough."
apparently he's here on behalf of yue qingyuan, who had asked him to do a post mission check up as soon as he was available, which is now. which yue qingyuan had apparently forgotten to relay to shen qingqiu himself. awesome.
he invites mu qingfang in (he can hardly close the door on him, it's late for him too!), and sits through the usual poking and prodding.
the system is prodding, too.
【 would user like some advice on how to maximize point earning? 】
no
【 ( •̯́ ^ •̯̀) system is only trying to help!! 】
i really don't need your help with this, thanks. i can keep a conversation on my own.
【 optional system booster: not mandatory. user may choose to decline this quest.
option 1: this one appreciates your care. the hardship is... unexpected. (look away shyly). i find it difficult to accept help sometimes, even when i need it.
option 2: i'm in love with you.
option 3: stand up and pretend to faint into his arms 】
shen qingqiu is about to spit blood—what the HELL is this!!! why do all your options make you look bipolar HUH??? and what's this about professing my love to people?!! why is that always an option??! this isn't a dating simulator, stupid system, they'll think i'm crazy!
【 all these options result in an increase of character satisfaction points (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) 】
HOW
【 (ó﹏ò。) user seems misinformed about character preferences. [mu qingfang] likes to take care of people! 】
... i decline the quest. booster. whatever. i'll figure it out myself. and stop talking about him like he's some one dimensional character!
they hear stumbling coming from the little side room, then the creaking of floorboards. binghe peeks through the door, hair sleep-ruffled and his robes pulled on over his sleeping clothes.
"shizun?" he asks, worried, "what's wrong? why is mu-shishu here?"
【 ⁺‧₊˚bonus scenario!!˚₊‧⁺˖ interactive dialog quest: pick the best suited options to win additional favor points! 】
oh god, not again.
【 option A: (gently) nothing is wrong, binghe. this master is alright. go back to sleep.
option B: (gently) nothing is wrong, binghe. this master is alright. (invite him to sit next to you during the examination)
option C: (gently) nothing is wrong, binghe. this master is alright. mu-shidi is just keeping me company tonight. 】
huh. so you can give meaningful options that i would actually consider picking?
【 ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜ 】
[admin notes: option A will decrease -100 points for luo binghe. option B will increase +20 points for luo binghe. option C will decrease -300 points for luo binghe, and increase +20 points for mu qingfang. option A & C increase luo binghe jealousy levels with 400 points].
#okay this about turned into a fic im so sorry#or am i...?👀#i liked this idea more than i originally thought skdjsksks#its just so GOOD#basically shen qingqiu upping points by getting into cliche romance novel maiden situations#and some more input from the system#might continue this#svsss#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#mu qingfang#liu qingge#yue qingyuan#scum villain#system svsss#svsss au#svsss romance simulator au#or something like that#my writing#scum villian’s self saving system#shen yuan
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