#she's my best friend btw. you don't know her she goes to a different school'

[givehimthemedicine]

Dear El,

How are you? Sorry I haven't written in a while. Same old shit over here. It's still snowing and school blows.

I'm supposed to do a project about somebody who's my hero. It's due in 2 days and I haven't started.

I thought I was having trouble because I don't really have a hero and don't know who to pick, but that's not really it. It's that I keep trying to think of someone who's saved a ton of lives or something, and you keep popping into my head. I know you're not supposed to pick your own best friend for a project like this, but, you've saved my life. Multiple times. You've saved every life on the planet technically. If that doesn't qualify you, what does?

Everyone in this class is still alive today because of you and they don't even know it, and they wouldn't believe me if I told them, and I know you wouldn't want me to even if I was allowed to.

I'll end up doing Marie Curie or some shit. I just wanted you to know I would pick you if I could. Actually if people knew half of what you've done, everybody would pick you.

OK, that's enough sap for one letter.

Tell me how school is going for you? I'm really sorry we don't get to go together. It must be a lot for you to get used to. I wish I sat next to you in all your classes. Are the boys looking out for you? They better be. Mail me any asses you need kicked.

Miss you really bad.

Love, Max

[paradiseprincesss]

please we need more Jim the delinquent season!!! please I beg idc if it's smut or fluff or both... Lol btw I am invested in your fics... Wait ngl smut sounds lovely...

perfect for you - jim (the delinquent season) x reader

masterlist

notes: hello lovely anon, i can definitely do that for you! fluffy and smutty jim content is a need. ugh, what i would do to call him mine.

summary: you've always found your best friends dad attractive. unbeknownst to you, the feeling was mutual on his end, especially after his divorce. one night, your best friend goes somewhere, leaving you and her dad alone together.

word count: 2.9k

warnings: 18+ mdni, smut, kissing, age gap (everyone is legal), reader is implied to be around 20 and jim is in his 40's, bestfriends dad! trope, p in v, aftercare <3

cassie had been your best friend for as long as you could remember. the two of you had met in elementary school, and your friendship lasted a lifetime. now, both you and her were attending college together; all grown up. purposefully, the two of you aimed to get into the same college as neither of you wanted to spend time apart from each other, even when it came to school.

you'd known her for ages, and you were super close with her family. likewise, she was close with yours, as you'd basically grown up together. however, cassie's parents divorced just over a year ago, so much to your dismay, you didn't get to see her mom as frequently anymore. she'd moved out even before her divorce was finalized, and you'd only see her occasionally now.

cassie decided to live her with her dad, jim, as he owned a lovely house quite close to campus, and you also lived just down the road. it was convenient for the both of you. jim was never very talkative, definitely more reserved than his ex-wife ever was, and you'd only really gotten to know him more after the divorce.

even though you'd known him for a majority of your life, you clicked with cassie's mom much more - isn't that how it always is, though? regardless, you would still come over frequently to cassie's place, as the two of you always worked on assignments together. even though she majored in something completely different than you, that didn't stop either of you from bonding over the college experience together.

for the first couple months after the divorce, jim was quiet. he would make small talk with the two of you, maybe ask how your lectures went but otherwise he would keep to himself.

during one particularly hot summer day, jim was having a few of his friends over to watch some sort of sports game, while you and cassie were upstairs working on homework. that same night, cassie got a text from a guy she was interested in from her class who'd asked her out, and you encouraged her to go out with him.

jim and you had talked a bit more frequently at this point in time, since he was finally coming out of his shell more. you didn't blame him after the whole thing with his marriage ending and all. that being said, you felt comfortable just chilling at her place as you'd most likely end up going home pretty soon after she'd left anyway.

plus, this wasn't out of the ordinary for you nor her. she'd often stay at your place for a few days at a time sometimes; the two of you were close like that. you'd do the same, staying over at hers for a few days as well, neither of your parents minded. it had always been this way, even when the two of you were growing up.

"are you sure? i can always tell him i'm busy." she asked you, touching up her makeup.

"oh my god, cass. just go, you've liked this guy for so long!" you insisted, giggling.

"yeah, i know," she laughed, "my dad has his buddies over to watch the stupid game, though. you can go home if you want, but if you get tired feel free to crash at mine tonight."

"i live down the road, but i will definitely keep that in mind." you say with a laugh, shaking your head.

"yeah but your basically my sister, so i don't care if you sleep here or whatever." she says, applying some lipgloss as she fixed her hair.

"go have fun tonight," you say to her, "and text me all the details."

"obviously," she says, turning to face you, "do i look good?"

"duh, like always." you say, glancing at her but returning to your notes as you scribble more stuff down from your textbook.

"if all goes well...i'll text you in the morning." she laughs, and you shake your head laughing along with your best friend.

that night, cassie did in fact have a great night - so great, in fact, that she ended up staying over at that guys house. however, she wasn't the only one who ended up sleeping in someone else's bed that night.

one thing led to another while cassie was gone for the night, and somehow you ended up in jims bed, tangled in the sheets and wrapped up in his arms. sleeping with your best friends dad was not something you planned on doing, but it sort of just...happened.

his buddies has gone home for the night, and you wandered downstairs so that you could quietly leave and return back to your house; but you noticed everyone had left already.

"you didn't go out with cassie?" jim's voice called out from behind you, and you turned around to see him leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen.

"no," you shake your head, "i have a final next week, i needed to study for it."

"ah, smart girl." he said softly in that accent that made your knees weak. for a moment, he was quiet. just staring at you while you stared back, unsure of what else to say.

"do you need help cleaning up?" you ask politely, since it wasn't too late. it was only quarter past eight, and he looked a little tired.

"don't worry about it." he smiled, and you shook your head.

"least i could do, i'm always over here anyways." you insisted, making your way to the kitchen.

there were only a few dishes scattered around, along with some empty beer cans and a few cups. you helped him put the food on the counter away and cleaned some of the dishes. after the two of you were done, he looked at you with a soft smile.

"you've always been so helpful," he smiled, "i appreciate it."

"it's no problem." you say back, watching him lean against the counter.

he doesn't respond, but instead just looks at you under the dim kitchen lighting, and his baby blue eyes pierce right through you.

"do you have a boyfriend? remind me, i forgot." he asked suddenly, and you felt your cheeks heating up at his rather...innocent question.

"n-no, i don't." you say with a nervous laugh.

"c'mere." he said and for a second, you thought you'd misheard him.

"what?" you asked quietly.

"come here." he repeated.

hesitantly, you make your way closer to him and look up at his blue eyes. he glances down at you, still leaning against the counter with his hands gripping the edge.

okay - if you were being totally honest right now, you had always found your best friends dad to be really attractive. but he was married for the longest time and he was also the father of your lifelong best friend! it was wrong on so many levels, but it appeared that neither of you seemed to cared.

suddenly, his hand was making it's way onto your waist, and you almost felt the need to pinch yourself in case this was all just a very vivid dream you were having.

"the walls are thin, you know," he said softly, rubbing circles into your waist with his thumb, "i heard you last week, on the phone to your friend or whoever while cassie was picking milo up from the vet."

your heart dropped. last week, cassie had to pick her dog up from the vet, and you were home alone with jim for around half an hour. within that half hour, another friend of yours called and somehow, the topic landed on jim. well, more like you'd told your friend you were staying at cassie's for the evening, which led to the friend asking about her parents divorce, which then led you to say some interesting things about jim.

"if he wasn't cassie's dad, i'd be all over that." you said to your friend as the both of you giggled over the phone.

"yeah, i've seen him. like, damn." your friend said, making you laugh once more.

"you have no idea what it's like when i come over, i literally have to force myself to focus on something - anything else." you tell her, but then you heard the front door open. "mhm, yeah. okay, i gotta go. bye."

with that, you ended your phone call - not realizing jim had been grabbing the laundry from the washer out in the hall. he heard everything, and he couldn't lie; it really turned him on. he always knew it was wrong, but he was definitely attracted to you. it started out innocent, like for example, it started when you had turned nineteen. he would think you looked really pretty when you wore a certain outfit, or when you did your hair a certain way.

then, as the next year or two went by, he found himself noticing other things about you. like how perky your tits looked in a certain shirt, or how badly he wanted to see you bend over when you wore a specific skirt. he tried to shake the thoughts of out his head - but it was no use.

"i-i didn't-" you stammered.

"shh," he assured you, "it's nothing to be embarrassed about. honestly, i wish you'd said something sooner."

"...you do?" you asked, a little taken aback by his words.

"i do," he said softly, "so why don't we both stop pretending like this isn't bound to happen."

his hands trailed along your waist and your hips, before his grip on them became tighter. pulling you close, he brushed a strand of your hair out of your face. the both of you leaned in - but you placed your hands on his chest, stopping him.

"jim, wait," you say, looking up at the older man in front of you, "i-i can't- i don't do casual hookups. their just not-"

"your thing, i know. i wasn't trying to imply that this was just going to be that," he assures you once more, "i want you in more than just that way."

"o-okay," you almost whisper, "me too."

he doesn't offer a verbal response, but rather gives your ass a tight squeeze whilst his lips came crashing down on yours. instinctively, you wrap your arms around his neck as he backs you up into the kitchen counter. recklessly, his lips still locked with yours, he hoisted you up onto the kitchen island. for a moment, both of you break away from the kiss with pink-tinted cheeks.

the thrill of kissing a man so much older than you (who also happened to be your best friends dad) was getting you worked up, and judging by the tent in his pants; it was getting him worked up, too. gently, he helped you out of your hoodie and sweats. you felt a shiver go up your spine as your ass rested on the cold granite of the counter, and he bit down on his lip at sight. with all your clothes discarded, you sat pretty for his taking on the counter with your pink, lacy bra and matching pink thong.

"look at you," he groaned, "so pretty, princess."

clearly, neither of you could even wait to take it to the bedroom. so, with adrenaline running through your veins, you help him out of his sweater and he reaches for his belt buckle. he pulls you into another heated kiss, this time one of his hands coming up to your throat to give it a soft squeeze. as he choked you gently, you moaned into his mouth, the action driving him insane.

he pulled away from the kiss and you felt his tip poke at your folds. you look down for a moment, and you could see him stroking himself with one hand as he lined his cock up with your entrance while the other hand rested gently around your throat.

before he put it in, he looked at you to make sure that this was okay, though he didn't say a word. you gave him a small, affirming nod and he rubbed the head of his cock against your wetness before plunging his cock in, taking you on the kitchen counter.

you let out a gasp as his veiny cock filled you, and he groaned at the feeling of your warm walls sucking him in. his hand quickly came off of your neck and down to your waist, his other hand doing the same. as his hands found purchase on your waist, he started to move in and out slowly, letting you adjust.

"j-jim," you moaned, throwing your head back, "ugh, feels so good."

"yeah?" he groaned, thrusting in and out much faster now, "d'you hear how wet you are, princess?"

when he mentioned it, your cheeks burned as your eyes rolled to the back of your head from his cock pounding your cunt. you could hear it - your pussy was dripping, and it was evident by the squelching sounds in the quiet kitchen.

"s-so wet, just for you- fuuuuck-" you whimper as his cock hit all the right spots inside of you.

one of jim's hands snaked up to your breasts, roughly kneading it and making you moan. you drooling hole started to squeeze down onto his fat cock, making him lose his breath. the both of you were chasing your highs and getting closer by the second.

"f-fuck, you're so tight, m'gonna fill this tight little pussy up." he decided, fucking into you deeply as he took you on his kitchen countertop.

"so close, jim, s-so mmph, close!" you cry out, squeezing your eyes shut as the pleasure consumed you and the coil inside of your stomach snapped.

"thaaaats it," he praised, "keep squeezing me like that, princess."

you bit your lip and moaned at the way he was talking, and he felt himself tip over the edge as he spilled into you with a groan. his hips continued to buck into you for a few more moments, fucking his cum deeper and deeper into your aching cunt.

after you both came down from your highs, he pulled his softening cock out of you. he watched with a sigh at the sight your pretty pussy which was now dripping with his cum. swiftly, he got a towel and started to wipe it up for you. he was taking his time and making sure you were taken care of afterwards, of course.

"how are you feeling?" he asked softly, wiping his seed that was dripping out from your cunt.

"a little sleepy," you admitted with a half-lidded smile, "and a little hungry."

"how about i run you a bath?" he suggested, laughing softly, "and then i'll order us some takeout from that italian place you like down on 47th and main."

"you know my favourite takeout place?" you giggle.

"obviously i do," he admits with a chuckle, "you told me a few months ago, remember?"

"well, yeah. i just didn't expect you to actually remember." you say with a sigh, and he pulls you into a chaste kiss.

"of course i remember, how could i forget?" he smiles after giving you a small peck, "so, does that sound good? a bath and your favourite takeout? then you can sleep in my bed tonight with me."

"first of all, that sounds wonderful, baby," you say, casually throwing the pet name in, "and secondly, can you join me in the bath, pretty please?"

he smiled as you called him baby, "i can't say no to that, princess."

"good." you say, beaming up at him.

true to his word, he did run you two a hot bath which you both enjoyed. after your steamy bath, he ordered your favourite food and the two of you laughed and cuddled on the couch whilst sharing a bottle of your favourite wine. after the two of you finished, you were both sleepy. as you and jim slipped into bed, he wrapped his arms tightly around you, giving you a kiss on the head before you both fell asleep.

the next morning, the two of you were still tangled in the sheets together, cuddled up in the blankets all cozy. cassie had returned sometime in the early hours just before sunrise, and as she made her way up the stairs, she noticed her dads bedroom door was cracked open slightly. she paid no mind to it - until she caught a glimpse of you in his bed with him.

doing a double take, she poked her head into his bedroom to find the both of you peacefully asleep. your head was resting on his chest as his arms were draped over you, the both of you looking so content.

cassie smiled and shook her head, laughing quietly to herself as she made her way back to her own room. contrary to what most peoples reactions would be; she wasn't mad. in fact, she kind of saw it coming in hindsight and hey, if you made him happy and he was good to you, then so be it.

though the both of you seemed oblivious to it, everyone else could see that you were perfect for him, and he was perfect for you.

my taglist (join here!): @seaamonster @nocturnest @bloodandglitter207 @humbuginmybones @oceanstem

@futurefamousdeadmusician @jonathancraneslittlepet @abigailinterrupted @kpopgirlbtssvt @ll4n4

@ilovetoxicfictionalmen @the-buddy-things @ellebelleshelby @aprilsfrog05 @wiseyouthinfluencer

@minedofmoria @strangeobsessed

[chaengluva]

Massive Deal [1]

This is the full story version of Too much of a massive deal, it will be a few chapters!

Regina George x Fem!Reader: Part 1: 3.7k words including intro

Btw, if you think things are going to fast or what not, this is like 3 of my wattpad chapters in one, so i don’t have to do to many updates and theres not as many parts.

————————————————————————————

Introduction

It was really unrealistic, I mean, having a crush on Regina George? When you told your best friend she said she wasn't surprised, It was almost the same reaction when you told her you were lesbian. You tell your best friend everything, she's the only person you truly trust in your friend group. Her name is Bella Christensen

You love all your friends but you were friends with Bella during elementary school, you told her you were lesbian and you haven't told your family yet, she's been a really good friend about it and hasn't said anything.

The worst part about having a crush on Regina George is being related to her best friend, Gretchen, you guys don't talk much because she is always with Regina, you just think it would be weird dating your sisters best friend.

Like the thought of Bella dating Gretchen makes you want to throw up inside.

You know this crush was just some silly teenager thing that will go away, you know she's not lesbian and most likely homophobic, so when you get into your senior year of high school you're plan for the year is to study hard (MOVE ON FROM REGINA GEORGE) and to have fun.

What will happen? Will Regina like You? Will people turn against each other?

“I fucking hate High School”

————————————————————————————

The sound of your loud alarm started to go off, waking you up instantly and you groaned, summer break goes way too quickly. You take all the energy inside you to move your hand and press the snooze button on your phone, wanting to sleep for some extra you close your eyes but then open again at the sound of your door opening, it was Gretchen, what the fuck is she doing up this early?

She made her way to your closet and started throwing your clothes everywhere, making a mess. "Gretchen! What are you doing?" Your sister rolls her eyes answering, "I'm looking for my white blouse, the one you wore on the last day of school." You get up out of bed and rush to your closet before she ruins anything else and searches through your doors, finally finding it. "Here it is." She smiles slightly, "Thanks sis." You smile and think about heading back to bed but you decide not to, you know if you went back in you would never get out again.

You looked through your closet, groaning seeing the limited choices, "Ugh! I have nothing to wear," You looked at the weather, wanting to dress appropriately for the weather. You see that it is quite warm, you sigh and leave your room, sneaking into your sister's room. She has a lot of good clothes.

You take a blue shirt and a white skirt, hoping that she doesn't notice you in her room. When you leave her room you bump into her, hiding the clothes you took behind your back (as if she hasn't already seen them) So she doesn't get mad, your sister sighs. "Fine, I'll do your makeup too."

She brings you into her bathroom and does a small natural look, and finding you a better outfit, you look at yourself in the mirror, "Damn, all the boys will be crushing on you." Gretchen says, applying a little more mascara, you hesitate but nod at her works, not wanting to tell her the truth.

"I'll add lip gloss after you eat." She smiles and the two of you go down stairs, greeting your mom before going to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Gretchen has some avocado toast and juice, while you just had some cereal.

The two of you sit on the table, she talks about how she is excited to start the year. It's crazy how different she can be at home compared to at school. Everyone in school knows that the two of you are related but you never sit with each other.

You thought about how you would move on from Regina, your best idea was to just ignore her at all costs, every time you see her you stare at her with heart eyes, but she will never dare to look back at you. You sigh deeply, lost in your thoughts, thinking about the first time you realised you liked Regina.

Flashback

-

You were sitting with Bella, it was the last first day of middle school, you decided to start the year by trying out for the cheer team, you were very nervous because you know that everyone sitting here as already tried out and made the team, you were the only, who was trying to do it for the first time.

They called your name, Bella cheered loudly, you giggled, getting up off the bench, you stood there nervously as the judges sighed a few things, you stood there awkwardly. They told you to start and you started to do your audition, you did a few tricks, after you were done you saw that there were smiles on their faces.

They all told you that they would be in contact, you nodded and walked back to your friend, she smiled brightly, giving you a big hug. "You did so well!" You smiled, hugging her back, you also felt like you did quite well.

The two of you walked out of the gym and walked into the change room so you could change out of your sweaty clothes, when you walked in, you gasped at the sight. Regina George standing there in her bra and tight leggings, you have never taken a close look at her body before, you must have been staring for a while because you had lost focus for everything else that was going on.

Bella waved her hand in front of your face to make you come back into reality. You jumped looking at her and she looked at you with a confused look, walking away she could change. Fuck, you were like every guy at the school, you had a crush on Regina George.

End of flashback

-

A similar situation was happening out, while you were thinking of this moment you were clearly spaced out, Gretchen shook your body to bring you back into reality. Damn, moving on from Regina will be harder than you think, she can still make you feel the same butterflies like she did in middle school.

"Regina is giving me a lift to school if you want to come." You thought that would be awkward as hell, you were honestly confused as to why Gretchen was asking you. You awkwardly laugh saying, "Oh.. It's okay, Bella is picking me up!" Gretchen nods, grabbing her purse, before walking out the door.

You grab your phone and call Bella, she answers instantly, "Hey! Y/n!" You smile at how happy she sounds, "Hey Bella, when will you be here?" You ask, only so you can know how long you have to get ready. "I'll be there in 10 minutes, " You rolled your eyes, Bella would always be late.

It was like Bella could hear you rolling your eyes, "What! My alarm didn't go off!" She defended, making up an excuse. You giggled, "Yeah sure, I'll see you soon." You say hanging up the phone, you look over and see that Gretchen didn't put her dishes away, being the better sister, you get up and put both yours and hers in the sink.

You go upstairs to brush your teeth and fix your hair, you put on both deodorant and perfume, you start to apply your lip gloss but you hear a car horn beeping which messes you up, and she doesn't stop. "Jesus Christ! Bella I'm coming!" You yell, as if she could hear you.

You grab your back and quickly rush outside the door, rushing into her car, you give Bella a massive hug, you don't feel her hug back which you find strange, you pull away and you see that she is looking at you with a glare, "What?"

"Y/n, you look like a fucking plastic."

Bella parked outside the school smiling happily at you. "So" Bella started, "When will I decorate my car park?" She asked, you smiled back, hitting her leg, "Soon." You smile, getting out of her car, waiting for her to come to your side so you could link arms and walk into school.

"I'm so annoyed we don't have many classes together," Bela groaned, leaning her head on her shoulder, smiling at you, you look into her eyes and smile at her, "Yeah but one class is better than none." You mention she nods, taking her head off her shoulder.

"I can't believe we have maths first." Bella groans, walking into homeroom sitting down on the table, you sat down on the table next to her, rolling your eyes at her, "At least we are in the same class first period." You mention but Bella jumps in, "I have PE right after!" You laugh at her, "That sucks, I have English."

You roll your eyes, throw your head on the desk, lie down until the bell rings, Bella laughs at you, "Jesus Christ, first day and you're already falling asleep in class?" You look up at her, glaring into her eyes, making her laugh more. "Don't try to be intimidating with me."

The bell finally rang, everyone was happy to be out of the homeroom, but not excited to start class. You and Bella decide to take the long way to get to class because the two of you really hate maths.

Luckily, maths class went quickly and now you were in English class, you didn't see anyone that you knew in the class so you decided to sit alone, on the table in the back. Soon after the class started Regina walked in, not even looking at the teacher or saying sorry for being late.

You looked around the class and noticed that the only available seat was next to you, so you moved your stuff without her asking, for the whole lesson you were breathing heavily while she didn't look your way once, she was actually just on her phone the whole lesson.

Probably texting her stupid boyfriend.

Finally, the class was over and it was time for the first break. You met up with Bella, who was sitting under a tree. Eventually, all your other friends join up, you were a bit sad that a few had moved schools, but the group was still close, it just wouldn't be the same.

"So how your guys' classes?." Jennie asks, smiling, you groan, "I have Regina In my English class." Everyone else groans, feeling bad for you but Bella smirks, hitting your shoulder, making sure to do it quickly so no one sees.

"I can't believe you're related to Gretchen." Charlie commented, giggling looking over at Jennie, you chuckled, nodding your head, "Yeah me too, but at the end of the day she is my sister and I love her." The two girls just roll their eyes, you look at Bella who gives you a sympathetic look, you just shake your head, you weren't bothered by them.

The four of you continue to talk, none of you notice Oliver Kim walking over to you. "Hey, Y/n, I was just wondering if you like to go out tonight." You look at Bella, still feeling slightly bad to reject some nice looking people. You open your mouth to answer, but you hear someone else talk. "She would love to!" Oliver smiles, "Great, I'll text you the details."

"Jennie!" You exclaim, "What! You have never been on a date with a guy! you deserve this." She says, rubbing your knee. You sighed knowing she was just trying to be a good friend and she doesn't know that you are lesbian, so you try your best not to get hurt by it.

The bell rang, everyone quickly gathered their stuff and rushed out to their class. You walked to your chemistry class, it sucked that it was on the opposite side of the school. You walk into the class and observe the people in the class, you see Janis sitting alone.

You weren't friends with Janis but you weren't enemies, you smiled, walking over, "Hey!" you say, she smiles, looking up at you, you smile back, "Can I sit here?" You ask, feeling a little nervous, she smiled at you, moving her stuff so you could sit down, you sat down smiling at her, taking your stuff out, she looked over at you and smiled.

You took notes on the lesson, It was around half way through the lesson, you felt Janis tap you on the shoulder, "What other classes are you in this year." She smiled at you, you smiled back at her, telling her what classes you were in, you were surprised and happy to find out that.

You put your attention back to the teacher, you wrote down a lot of notes because if you were being honest, you were scared for this year, so you wanted to do your best in the classes. At the end of class, you and Janis had art next, "Hey so, do you want to walk to art together."

You smile nodding, walking to art with her, you start to talk about what you guys did over the summer. You walk inside and you smile when you see Damien, you know Janis and Damien are close so you let Janis go off to be with him. "Damien! You know Y/n." She smiles, He smiles back, "Of course I do, she's beautiful!" He exclaims, you giggle, looking down slightly shy with the complement.

"Class, Listen up!" Everyone turns their heads to the teacher, she continues to speak once everyone is paying attention, "Today we will paint freestyle, you can paint whatever you want." You smile, go through the paint box grabbing what you need, you look up images on your laptop, to get some ideas on what you can paint.

You settle on a landscape of a flower field, you put on an apron because you know Gretchen would murder you. You started to work on the painting, making sure to stay very focused. Janis sees this as a perfect opportunity to talk to Damien.

She pulls him into the other side of the classroom, making sure that there is no way that you would be able to hear, leaning in close she opens her mouth to talk, "Girl, you're way too close!" Damien says, too loud for Janis' liking. She quickly shushes him, backs up slightly and whispers.

"I think I like y/n."

Damien looked at You then looked at Janis, "You.. Like her?" Janis nods quickly. Damien rolls her eyes. "She's like the straightest girl here." Damien exclaimed, Janis hit him on the shoulder. "Ow!" He said, grabbing his shoulder, Janis rolled her eyes at him saying, "It shouldn't hurt that bad.." He glares at her his arm didn't really hurt, he was just being dramatic. "Anyway, you can't assume someone's sexuality!" Janis said a little too loudly, grabbing the attention of a few people.

"Look, my point is that. She's really pretty." Janis smiles, looking at You as if she could get lost in your eyes, "You know she's related to Gretchen." Damien whispers, Janis looks back at him, rolling her eyes before saying, "So what? You literally date Regina's ex boyfriend." Damien hits Janis softly, not too hard to the point where it hurts, they go back to greet you, gasping at the amazing process.

"Wow! You did that all just now?" Janis exclaims happily, you nod but don't say anything back, you don't want to lose your focus on the artwork, Janis smiles behind you, admiring your focus in the artwork, you have no Idea how she is looking at you, but she is looking at you the same way you looked at Regina George in middle school, the time you realised you liked her.

You looked back and she looked away, making you smile brightly. The teacher says that the bell will ring soon so everyone should start to pack up. You signed, packing your things and cleaning the supplies. You waved goodbye to Janis and Damien, knowing you would see Janis in PE.

You head to the cafeteria, smiling when you see your best friend, you sit down on the table, sitting next to Bella, you decide to wait for the line to die down before getting food.

You smile at her but she doesn't smile back. You look at her confused. "What's up?" You ask, honestly confused. She pulls you close so no one else hears, "I'm saying this before they come, aren't you worried about that date with Oliver tonight?"

You sigh, you had forgotten about that. You're very self-conscious so texting him or bailing on him wasn't even an option, and Bella knew this. She tried to comfort you the best she could because she knew as soon as Charlie and Jennie would come over, they would not shut up about it.

You heard the two girls walk over and just like you and Bella guessed, they didn't shut up. "Oh my god! I can't believe you're going out with Oliver Kim!" Jennie said happily, "Yeah!" You say, trying your best to actually sound happy, you look over at the line and see that it's smaller now. "I'm going to get my lunch." Hoping up, you go and grab a tray and line up to get your lunch.

In the line you could feel someone's eyes on on, they were standing next to you and you couldn't make out who it was, you decided to glance to the side to see if you can make out who it is, you smile brightly when you see it is Janis, pay for your food then sit down, smiling at your friends, "How was your classes?" Charlie asks, looking at you, smiling, you say, "Good, we did painting in art already!" They all smile brightly.

Lunch goes by quickly and you have to rush to the change room to get in your PE clothes, when you get in the change room with Janis you gasp at the sight, it was like you were back in middle school again, Regina George was there, in her sports bra. She was in the same PE class as you.

You don't notice how long you are staring at her, a loud voice brings you back to reality, it was Janis this time. She pulled you to the side, a space where no one could see. "You were staring at Regina.." She says, with almost a hint of sadness in her voice, you shake your head, wanting to deny it. "I wasn't! I swear."

She rolls her eyes, "You were staring at her boobs!" She whispers, yells, you sigh, looking down at the floor. "Y/n?" She asks, making you look up. "Yeah?" You ask, wanting her to continue, "Are you.. Gay?" She asks and you stare at her in shock, "No, I'm not!" You exclaim, scarred that Bella might have told someone. "I think you might be.." She adds, which makes you more upset. "You have no right to tell me my sexuality."

You push past her and go to change into your PE clothes, not bothering to even look at her when you exit the change room, or on the field, the teacher asks everyone to get into two teams and you try your best to not be in the same team as Janis, but just your luck you ended up on her team, along with Regina and a few other people.

The teacher asked everyone to do soccer drills, you couldn't help but stare at Regina, she looked so hot in a high ponytail. Fuck, you're doing in again y/n. You brush yourself out of it this time, you focus on ignoring how pretty Regina looks and ignore Janis' many attempts to talk to you, the only thing you should focus on is worrying about the date tonight.

For a boy you don't even like, the gender you don't like.

You must have been lost in your thoughts because the next thing you remember is a ball being kicked to your stomach and you were clutching it, struggling to catch your breath, you look over and see to girls laughing, you don't know their names but you can tell that they are new and already don't like you. "Hey! Assholes!" You hear someone yell, but you can't make out who it is.

You feel someone grab your hand and sit you down, you look over and see Janis, she is holding your water bottle and allows you to drink some of her water. You look at her with sad eyes, "I'm sorry for being a bitch." Janis just giggles, "It's okay, I'm sorry for assuming anything." You smile, nodding your head, drinking the water that Janis gave you. God you're good at covering your sexuality up, it's become natural.

"Hey, you okay?" You look up and you're surprised to see Regina standing there asking if you are okay, you try your best to play it cool but she is wearing a white top and a black bra, you try your best not to stare so you just quickly answer, "Yeah, I'm okay now." She nods, running away to other people in the class, your eyes follow her, a smile slowly creeps up on your face. "Y/n." You hear Janis call out. You turn your head back to her, "Yeah?"

"Wanna hang out with Damien and I tonight? We are going to stay at mine and watch movies, I'll give you a lift to school!" You frown slightly, you want to go, but you have other plans, "Sorry I can't tonight." You can see that she looks sad, "But hey! If my plans end early! I'll join you guys!" Her facial expression changes and she smiles brightly, "Can't wait!"

————————————————————————————

Now this is gonna be a little confusing, let me know if you would like a page that has a list of all the main characters/oc’s because there are quite a few.

[candyfsh]

.ᐟ.ᐟ bed chem (nonsexual) ༉‧₊˚.

by candyfsh

a/n — this is the roomie thing from the poll btw!! also how are we liking the new layout..... idkkk

. ݁ ˖ . ݁ ୨ৎ . ݁ ˖ . ݁

y/n and dallas both live up in the apartments in buck's bar. it isn't the best place, but it was good enough, plus, y/n knows dallas. they aren't good friends or anything. they actually tend to avoid each other, but they don't not like each other.

they both have their differences. a lot, actually. she's a girly girl, he's obviously not. she's normally a people person, while he aims to intimidate others. she goes to school, he doesn't. etc, etc. but they can't not like each other. they just avoid each other because of the amount of differences they have. they don't have anything in common.

tonight, y/n is fumbling with her shower and the knob that turns the water on. she groans, unable to figure out what the issue is. she'd ask buck for help, but he's busy bartending.

although it might be awkward, maybe she could ask dallas for help. she'd just need to wrap a towel around her, of course. so she quickly does that, and exits her bathroom. she holds her arm tight around the towel as the other arm reaches out to open her bedroom door.

"dallas?"

after a moment, she can hear a faint, "what?" come from his room. she approaches his room, but stays outside. she pauses.

"can you help me with my shower, please?" she asks politely, but it's clear she's impatient with the dumb shower.

he pauses before responding to y/n, seemingly thinking about it for a second. "i don't know how to do that, man. that's som' for a plumber or whatever."

there's a bit of a silence. dallas doesn't seem to care much, and y/n's just wondering what to do. she doesn't want to ask if she can use his shower.

"yknow what?" he speaks up through the door. she perks up a little bit, wondering if he'd offer up his shower or not. fortunately for her, he's feeling generous. "jus' use my shower, mkay?"

y/n smiles. "thank you, i'll go get my clothes."

not like he's totally immature, or not like he doesn't think she's attractive, but a small shudder runs through his body at the realization that she's probably naked in front of his door. he doesn't respond to her. he just focuses his eyes back on the tv and he brushes his hair back.

. ݁ ˖ . ݁ ୨ৎ . ݁ ˖ . ݁

dallas swears he heard the water running for an hour straight. he probably didn't. but once the water turned off in the bathroom, he didn't know exactly how to feel. even if y/n was in his bathroom, it felt kind of nice to have her in his room.

the bathroom door opens, so dallas perks his head up to look. a towel is wrapped around her body and she's brushing her hair out. she makes little eye contact before moving out of his room and going to her own. he furrows his brows. she's leaving and she didn't even get changed?

fortunately for both of them, she was just grabbing products she forgot in her own bathroom. she quickly returns with a small amount of skincare items and a bottle of perfume. dallas would never in a hundred years mention it, but he loves the smell of her perfume.

y/n leaves the bathroom door cracked. dallas looks back up at his tv, before deciding to make conversation.

"what's all that shit you brought in?"

he could hear a quick "hm" sound from the bathroom. he's not sure if it was directed towards him or not.

"skincare," she replies. "don't you use it?"

boys don't often use skincare products. they never really have, and they probably won't in the future. who knows, though?

with a light-hearted scoff, dallas responds to her innocent question like he's too good for that kinda stuff. "no."

"my mistake." y/n says in a quieter tone, as if she was telling a secret to whoever was in the next room. she's quiet, but not too quiet. she's not loud, either. "i thought you used it."

dallas furrows his eyebrows again and looks toward the door. he's not insulted or offended, anything like that. just kind of surprised.

"how come?" he asks.

she gives that soft, quick "hm" sound again. "your skin is pretty. i've felt it, too. it's smooth."

he doesn't know how to take this. it sounds nice, since she complimented his skin and called it pretty. but this isn't the type of compliments he's used to. almost every girl that compliments him calls him the typical lustful terms. it's new.

"...thanks."

a soft chuckle could be heard from the bathroom, then a drop of the towel. he looked away from the door as she shut it completely. they could still talk, though.

"should i make my next comment sound more normal and not with...cannibalistic undertones?" she asks with the cutest little laugh dallas has ever heard.

he can't help but let out a small, scoff-like laugh. he shook his head, as if she can currently see him.

"i didn't take it that way, 's alright." dallas chuckles breathily.

. ݁ ˖ . ݁ ୨ৎ . ݁ ˖ . ݁

after y/n got ready for the night, said her thanks to dallas and left his room, he had this nagging feeling in the back of his head. he can't quite identify it. but it has to do with her, and that's all he knows.

and as though he summoned her, y/n knocks on his bedroom door. it's about 9:30 pm or 10:00 pm, somewhere in between. this is usually when she gets ready to sleep, so he assumes it's buck.

"come in."

he knows it's not buck anymore by the hesitant turn of the knob and the slightly slow door pushing. she smiles softly at him.

"i don't think buck likes me, dal..." that's the first time, or one of the first times she's used one of his nicknames. it sounds so sweet coming from her. "my heater isn't working for tonight."

dallas gives her a look of feigned annoyance. he scoots to the other side of his bed and pats the spot next to him. y/n seems relieved that he let her in. he doesn't do this often. maybe because she's kind of his roommate? maybe because she's so unlike him, he just can't say no? who knows?

she approaches the bed and sits down next to him, then leans back against the extra pillows.

his bed is nothing bigger than a twin bed, so hopefully, they'll both adapt. dallas is used to having a girl in his bed. maybe this just feels different because y/n is not his type. but if she's not his type, why does he get this weird feeling as he sees her in his bed? and why does he feel a skip in his heartbeat as he smells her perfume?

"yknow, my room ain't the warmest, y/n." dallas points out, his eyes on his pretty roommate. she looks up at him and smiles softly.

"i know," she glances at his tv, which is playing some old western film. she looks back up at dallas. he's right, his room isn't the warmest. but it also isn't really cold. just chilly. "but i figured body heat would be beneficial, right?"

he tilts his head to the side slightly, and a tiny, harmless smirk forms on his lips. he likes the way she thinks, even if it is a basic way of thinking. he'd never do that. if he's cold, he sucks it up.

"yeah. yer right."

. ݁ ˖ . ݁ ୨ৎ . ݁ ˖ . ݁

[nastasya--filippovna]

A funny little story full of funny little coincidences and sweet serendipity, but I know people on this site love that

This is a funny story of how I got into the Good Omens fandom. And it is so weird that sometimes I even amaze myself when I tell someone. But I love to tell this one....... so....................................

Late 2021 I watched Wilde and I absolutely loved it. And the best thing out of the movie was that I discovered Michael Sheen. I remember at the time being struck by two things: a) how this actor who had a side character and a small role was so magnificently out-acting great actors like Jude Law (just my personal opinion plz don't come at me for that) and all because of these beautiful micro-expression which I find myself criticizing many big actors like Brad Pitt even for that they lack good subtle micro expression and its as if their faces are dead, nothing is going on there. But Michael is always acting even when the camera is not focused on him he is in character. And (b) his fine beauty. I mean as a lesbian and more than that a portrait artist, I was mesmerized by the artistic beauty in the most non-sexual way.

And I found myself spiraling down the MS hole. And I watched literally everything he has ever done. Except one thing.

Good Omens.

That was because I love Neil Gaiman as a writer. His books have saved me during some very dark times in my love and his work is absolutely sacred to me. To be honest I didn't enjoy his other adaptations. They sucked the juiciness out of the books and kinda confirmed my earlier conviction that no filmed adaption of a book will ever do justce to the written word.

And it's so weird that I had seen all the other adaptations but I hadn't ever heard of GO adaptation.

And then one day I was like yk what just f^ck it. I'll just watch it and strike this one of my list (I'm a cinephile on a mission to watch almost everything ever made in the world).

So I'm watching it and I'm like oh look MS looks so ethereal. Born to play an angel. Look at those floofy wings.

BUT something was bugging me. Usually in most MS movies/shows he keeps out-shining, out-acting his co-stars. Just out there being the best making everyone else look flimsy. But here there was one person who is NOT looking flimsy with MS. Infact he keeps complementing him so perfectly it looks like a graceful waltz.

'Yeah so the demon guy is a great actor I guess'

But that's not why my mind is bugging me. There was something else some weird deja vu kind of familiarity.

I try to ignore it.

Two days later my sister is scrolling through her Pinterest and she goes "What's a Doctor Who?"

And I was like "It's an old childhood show I used to watch, you wouldn't know (she has never seen Doctor Who btw).... why're you asking?"

And she holds up her phone and she's like "Idk it says he's a Doctor Who?" (btw I love the way she says 'a Doctor Who')

And my mind went whoooooooosh!

It's such a strange feeling when stuff you'd forgotten, stuff that was once really special to you, but seems to be lost, and yet is only nestling in some corner of you chaotic mind waiting for the day it'll one day come into the light again, that's tuff comes whooshing back.

I grew up loving DW. Especially Ten. Well I was a tad bit pissed when Nine regenerated into DT and I was like noooooooo who's this skinny f^cker.... I don't want it. But I just fell in love with Ten. To my little lonely-kid-in-school-weirdo-nerd-wallflower self Ten was a best friend who made me feel that it's okay to be different to be geeky and childlike without being embarrassed. Ten was a secret best frined.

And when he regenerated I stopped watching the show. And I forgot about it because I was so busy adulting I lost track of everything I had cherished as a kid.

Now almost 15 years later I found out that my new favorite character (along with Aziraphale cz they're equally special to me) was played by the same person who played my childhood favorite character. And that he's also the best actor I have ever seen so I spiraled down DT hole and I am obsessed (not ashamed to say this). And guess what I found.... almost every show or movie I had watched as kid, he was there.... Ducktales, Harry Potter, Loud House, Einstein and Eddington, Mary Queen of Scots...... its endless.

And the 60th Anniversary special, well it's the most specialist thing to me. I feel like a child again.

GO and DW. Best things that ever happened to me

So thanking Neil Gaiman and Russel T. Davies and MS and DT for making my childhood better....... constantly, because it's never over..... the child lives in me constantly...... she's alive again. Thank you for keeping that child alive and helping her through the darkest nights .

Meena x

[dangermousie]

I have been feeling in the mood for rewatching something very melo and old-school and of all possible dramas, the one that comes to mind is delightfully melo 2004 kdrama Say You Love Me with very young Kim Rae Won. 15 eps of deliciousness. The plot is take Dangerous Liasons but make it wholesome ie the best thing ever.

Kim Rae Won and Yoon So Yi are a pure and unworldly couple brought up by Buddhist monks who consider holding hands the height of sexual ecstasy. Alas, they end up in the Big City of Sin and things are about to go pear-shaped as they meet Yina, who the drama tries to claim is more complex than what she really is - a batshit secondary girl so beloved by old kdramas and yours truly. She becomes KRW's boss but does not like seeing all that pure and happy love so she asks her hot friend with benefits to seduce the girl while she decides to work on Kim Rae Won. Honestly, I watched this over a decade ago, so all I remember is monks, KRW's cheeks, happy ending with bicycles and the below scene where Lady Cougar finally gets her claws into Buddhist Virgin. (@aysekira is now groaning because I shared it with her earlier.)

So, our pure as the driven (or more aptly never driven) snow KRW brings his drunk boss to her house.

He: OK, I brought my supposedly drunk boss home, can I go now to dream of butterflies and puppies? She: I have Kim Rae Won in my house! In other words, not so fast, buster! I know the lighting is arthouse but this drama ain't!

He: OK, I really need to go home, my equally virginal gf is coming back in the morning! Maybe she will let me get to the second base, I must be ready.

She: I can talk or take my top off. It's a kdrama, so I'll talk.

Does she mean she is into bdsm? Well, at least she is being honest, even if he doesn't seem to be happy with it.

At this point, even almost a monk dude is realizing something is way off and trying to steer it into safer channels.

Seriously, adorable! I want to pinch his cheeks! So does she, even if it's a different set of cheeks.

God, I miss the craziness of old school secondary girls. They were so unhinged and glorious! Also, clearly there was no sexual harassment and hostile environment claims in old timey kdrama Korea because she's not just any cougar, she's his boss! (If you ask me what job monk educated dude of monkishess could possibly, I will frankly admit that I do not remember, and cannot honestly imagine.)

We have all so been there with truly awkward convos with insane people.

OK, I laughed. She literally pounces on him from behind like a demented bear. Btw, the fact that they are wearing about 17 layers of clothing makes it even more surreal. Between them they are exposing about three inches of skin total and that includes the noses.

Meanwhile, in case we don't get the irony, his Pure Girlfriend is gazing lovingly at his necklace and thinking 'I love my boyfriend because he'd never give up the jewel he promised to Jesus Buddha to anyone but me. Certainly not the sleazy boss lady who must have more STDs than James Bond'

Meanwhile, at the Den of Sin, Buddhist Virgin tries to extricate himself. However, he is surprisingly non-efficient for a man who's a foot taller and a good 100lb heavier. Even if his Buddhist principles prohibit punching her in the kisser, surely he can shove her or something. Or just fall backward on top of her and smoosh her.

And then she goes for the kill. I note that despite his clenching his fist in emotional agony, soon he's macking on her quite thoroughly with his mouth. That is what happens when you get abstinence only education and never enjoy yourself despite healthy libido. Your poor hormones probably go "quick quick before his beliefs suppress us again, this is our only chance!"

Birds and bees indeed! (Also, I see where your hands are, buster. They are around Ms. Cougar!)

(I half expected it to be a rose and for it to wilt or at least a petal to fall off, iykyk)

In the morning after, she is enjoying her beauty sleep and he's understandably freaking out. (Sinfully, he is now down to mere two layers of clothing and secondary girl, to show her sluttiness, is down to merely one!)

OK, I like to make fun but I do genuinely feel bad for the kid especially since I am much much older than I was when I first watch this drama and I just want to cut crusts off his sandwiches, tell him to avoid strange women and carry mace or something.

He bolts from her touch and she is genuinely surprised. I am not sure why as he's a devout dude with a serious girlfriend; if she wanted a more pleasant end to her night, she should have dragged in a character played by Jang Ki Yong, who's sort of made a niche for a younger hunk rejoicing in casually being banged by older ladies. (If you want to feel really old, Jang Ki Yong was 11 when this drama came out. You are welcome.)

If you think this face means realized this was a dumb choice and unlikely to lead to anything good, you are not familiar with old time kdramas. I genuinely do not get her obsession because sure KRW is cute as hell but the sex couldn't have been much good and he generally treats her as a leper.

His gf comes home but he doesn't meet her because he is too dirty and unworthy to see her!

And then they talked it out and worked it out.

Ha!!!! This is a 15 ep drama, we are only getting started baby!

So yeah, watch me rewatch this insanity.

[altijd-november]

so i have seen dead poets society but it's been awhile and i know you like it so tell me about it

OKAY so this will be very long so proceed with caution

the main characters are neil perry and todd anderson. neil's father is very controlling and wants neil to become a doctor and basically neil does everything he asks always. then there's todd, he's new at their school (welton) and the personification of anxiety. they have a new english teacher, mr keating. he is everything that the school is not and not only teaches them english, but also to think for themselves, to make art, poetry, to live life to the fullest.

neil and todd are roommates (AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES) and neil manages to convince todd to join his friends. they are knox overstreet, charlie dalton, stephen meeks, gerard pitts and richard cameron.

knox is a creepy straight guy with a crush on chris noel (my gf fr). chris is a very (very very) pretty girl who has a boyfriend, chet danburry. knox has dinner at the danburry's (smth to do with making connections) and meets chris, who's there with her best friend ginny danburry. anyway he goes to a party and at some point chris falls asleep and this creepy bitch decides to start stroking her forehead. he gets noticed, chet beats him up, chris wakes up yells at him to stop. she's mad at both of them.

charlie dalton is charlie dalton. unique in every way and we love him for it.

meeks and pitts are nerds and built a radio together. they dance together. even though only one of them can hear the music at a time. they are everything to me.

cameron is the most overhated character in the series. he's a kid trying to survive school and be good and i need to hug him.

neil becomes a theatre kid. todd a poet. after the show shit happens that we don't talk about.

now for headcannons. obvi todd and neil are gay for eachother. the subtext is there. (walt whitman, tchaikovsky, gay ass staring, practicing lines together...).

charlie is a bisexual disaster. god i love him too. he's on the arospec btw. i feel like he's got some funky gender stuff going on but i cannot settle for anything, but he's something for sure. he's in love with knox, who is also bi and also a disaster. idk i dont really like cannon knox and try not to think about him.

meeks and pitts are in a qpr and no one can tell me differently. meeks is aroace and makes the worst sex jokes. pitts is aspec to me. ALSO bigender meeks my beloved.

cameron collects A's (grades, gender, sexual and romantic orientation, autism and anxiety). they're very sex and romance repulsed and hate it when people say that they're the token straight (they're very closeted to me). cam is my favourite character to write angry.

chris is very bisexual and transfem. she's in love with ginny after she breaks up with chet and the stuff with knox is unrequited because i say so.

ginny is non-binary and a lesbian. they've been in love with chris for forever and had to watch her date her brother... ouch angst incoming.

i am stopping myself here to protect my sanity. questions are welcome always. if you read all this you get a cookie.

[bomberblondie]

Hi bomberblondie. I haven't read the manga in a while but do you think Bakugou would have changed his superiority complex without Deku? I know he was paired with Endeavor because of their similarities. Bakugou grew a lot in that time frame. He's one of my favorite characters but I want another perspective.

Hi anon! Me neither tbh lmao, but I will do my best to answer either way. :)

First off, do you mean the big three internship at Endeavor's with the "time frame"? Because if so, then I don't see how that would pair them up. In fact, I think Bakugou's similarities to Endeavor are shallow at best, because at their core, they are entirely different people. Bakugou does not respect Endeavor at all and only goes to the internship because he admits that he can still learn from him, only in regards to fighting techniques though.

I'd say Endeavor doesn't have a superiority complex at all, instead he was weighed down by his own inferiority complex to an extent that he believed he himself could never surpass All Might and had to have his child do it. His aggression turns violent so incredibly easily when he fears he can't reach his goals and he takes it out on others.

Bakugou himself is a classic case of gifted child syndrome and I'd say his aggression stems equally from his feelings of inferiority that he tries to hide but also his violent upbringing. I really don't like how Mitsuki raised him, she made everything worse for him even though she does love her son. Ugh but I digress. I would definitely say that Bakugou is so much less violent than Endeavor, yes he does hurt some kids in the first chapter and has his fights with Deku, but that's on a completely different level. Also, Bakugou has the tendency to shove everything down inside first and suffers greatly from it, something I don't see in Endeavor at all.

So basically, while they do seem similar at first glance, I think Bakugou and Endeavor have different problems and in my opinion, Endeavor played no role in Bakugou's development.

Onto the actual question! Yes, I 100% believe that Bakugou would have come around without Deku as well. To be honest, I actually believe that Deku's existence was detrimental to Bakugou's development because he pushed into Bakugou's insecurities and made him pull up his walls even higher. All of Bakugou's bullying and shouting is just a defense mechanism so he can push his fears away.

It's not his true personality though. At his core, Bakugou is a boy who wholeheartedly wants to be good. It shows again and again when he doesn't even think about the LOV's offer to join them after they kidnap him, when he helps his friends with homework for nothing in return, when he gives Kirishima his money back and makes a Kaminari joke to lighten the mood etc etc.

Also, despite calling all the other people "extras", Bakugou doesn't actually look down on them, as is shown when he is the ONLY person (besides Aizawa) who actually takes Uraraka in their school tournament fight seriously. One of my fav moments btw, feminist icon Bakugou is real fr fr

What defines Bakugou is that he wants to become the top hero with his own power, legally, according to the rules and without cheating. He hates lying and wants to do everything right. His aggressive personality and superiority complex stand in the way of that, as people apparently don't believe he can be a hero like that, so I think that no matter what happened, Bakugou would have worked on those flaws so that he can make his dream come true.

Bakugou got humbled when he failed the Hero License Exam, and in the remedial course, he showed development when he said that you can't see your own weaknesses when all you do is look down on people. Deku had nothing to do with that, but his own reflection and maybe Todoroki did. In general, I think Todoroki and Bakugou's relationship is one of the healthiest in the entire manga, but that's a topic for a different day. What's also noteworthy is that the remedial course is the first time Bakugou's upbringing was actually addressed. Violence proved not to be the right way to help them overcome the challenge.

During class 1a vs 1b, Bakugou put all this to action. He wanted to win with top marks, and he learned through everything he experienced, which wasn't really with Deku all that much, that he had to work in a team to achieve that, so he did. When I saw that scene, I wasn't surprised in the slightest, I always knew he had it in him.

Yes, there are scenes where it seems like Deku is a huge factor in Bakugou's development, but I think it's difficult to estimate their actual worth in it, because most of the problems Deku "helps" solving, he had a part in causing.

All Deku does is make Bakugou feel bad, and then later feel bad about himself. Yes, Bakugou has reason to feel bad, but ehh, as I described in my other post, their relationship is very complicated and Deku is not the only victim there.

Phew, talked a long time about this, I hope you enjoyed it! So yes, I do believe that through his own desire to become a good hero and with the help of his other classmates, Bakugou would have been able to overcome his superiority complex and aggressiveness just as well.

[effielumiere]

All I Want - Kim Namjoon x Reader

Pairing: Kim Namjoon x Reader, OC x Reader

Genre: Romance? Idol AU, Drama, Angst?, Best Friends to (???)

Warning(s): Cursing/Language. Angsty angst? Get your tissues... i think... or not. Two shoes being thrown at Joonie .UNEDITED!

Word count: 12k (I'm so sorry, I got too carried awaaayyy~)

Summary: Kim Namjoon has been in love with his high school best friend ever since he first laid eyes on her. Nearly fifteen years later, he's known all around the globe as BTS's leader RM, but none of that matters to him personally, because all he ever wanted aside to live his dreams was to be with Y/n. However, it seems it's too late. She's about to get married in the following day and he's too afraid to watch her be forever in the arms of someone else that isn't him and for the first time since he's debuted, he wants to try and confess again, even though he knows that this time it's going to be different. He knows you're not going to stay. No amount of pleading and begging will make him yours. So, this time he's going to do that right thing and confess, not to make Y/n changer her mind, but to say goodbye. It's right thing to do anyway... Nothing could possibly go wrong .... right?

Author's Note: I *legit* forgot that this song existed until i read This Chapter of House of the Omegaverse by @sopejinsunflower and remembered it. Without giving much away, the scene goes with Namjoon and the reader looking at each other while the reader was singing it, and I remember how I felt like someone abruptly pulled my heartstrings leaving in a tiny angst mood. And that was moooonths ago btw lol. That story was an inspiration for this and this baby has been sitting on my drafts since House of the Omegaverse ended (please go check out @sopejinsunflower 's work 🥺) I'm a bit behind schedule but I'm pretty sure it's still September 30 in California ... Hopefully lmao. This was originally for Namjoon's birthday, but I got busy so here I am lol. Please leave your feed back in the comments or send me an ask teehee don't be shy😄 And btw, this is completely unedited most parts were written while I was half asleep and tired on the shuttle headed home lol. ENJOOOOYYY!

Armand (OC [Korean Englishmen/JOLLY]) is none other than this young man right here.

< main masterlist >

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Namjoon closed his eyes as the cool wind blew past his face, relished the last night he was going to spend with his long time best friend who was getting married when the morning comes. 6 hours. That's all he needed and that was all the time he got. The sun was already starting to set when he opened his eyes to gaze at the sight before him.

Her. She was wearing a pastel blue dress with small white polkadots, light make-up on her face that accentuated her eyes and enhanced her best features. Her eyes he thought Her eyes are the most beautiful set of eyes he's ever seen. She was looking around the floor watching happily as waiters walked past our table with food on the trays they were balancing elegantly with one hand.

"Oh, Joon," she smiles as she brings the wine glass to her lips to take a sip "I'm so excited for tomorrow, everything went as planned and tomorrow, I'm finally going to be a married woman and have my dream wedding"

"I'm happy for you," he gave her a smile "Truly?" she asks. Namjoon cocks his head to the side, a habit he's that shows his disappointment and sometimes, his disapproval of a certain situation.

"What is it?" she asks, her smile slowly fading, concerned for her best friend "Is everything alright?" Instead of answering, he picks up his glass of whiskey and downs it in one go, slightly wincing at the burn as he contemplates on whether or not he should spill his emotions and tell her how he truly feels, or hold back, let her be happy and never see her again as long as he lives.

"Namjoon" she calls him, making him slowly look up at her "I'm excited about tomorrow, but I'm also nervous"

"Don't be," he tells her in a low voice as he controls himself from talking more than he should.

"Joonie, remember when we went to the beach?" Y/n asks "You know, the place where we met up because I needed your help with my math homework" he simply nods at her not trusting his voice. He's drank enough whiskey for tonight to last a lifetime, he thinks. He motions for the bill at their waiter who was patient waiting for them to leave as they were the last customer of the restaurant for the night.

Namjoon planned everything for this particular evening, he planned of making sure that she had a relaxed night where she wasn't going to worry about anything, including the wedding but what he didn't plan was to entertain the nagging thought he had to tell her how he's really felt for the past 15 years of his life, but at the same time he was scared. Scared to lose her, he decided to shut his mouth and let her, watch her meet someone else, fall for someone else... love someone else.

The night of the engagement, Namjoon watched as videos and pictures of Y/n and her now soon to be husband to be all smiles and happiness on the timeline of his social media accounts, the comments filled with happy wishes and he felt... numb... and angry. No. Not angry. Furious. Furious at himself for being a coward and not trying hard enough, and not expressing what he really felt about her all these years.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

He waited, until 5 years ago when he thought he'd visit her college campus to pick her up and take her out on a date, hoping she wouldn't say no. But he was too late, so there she was, walking out of the college building, laughing and smiling as she ran into the arms of a man he didn't know, and surprised him the most, they two kissed. And it definitely didn't look friendly. Namjoon unknowingly clenched his jaw and fists at the sight, crushing the poor stems of the bouquet of peonies and sunflowers that he brought for Y/n especially for this occasion.

"Are you okay, Mon-ah?" Jin asks from the driver's seat, looking at the rare view mirror.

"I don't think so, hyung," Yoongi answers for him from the passengers side, nodding his head at the direction Y/n was still smiling and laughing, then they're holding hands as they walked away from the building.

Jin didn't need words to start driving back to their dorm, and when they arrived the maknaes were outside waiting for them with an expectant gaze in their eyes. Parking the car, Namjoon quickly got out, slamming the car door with a bit too much force. Roughly throwing the bouquet on the nearby bin, he walks like a man on a mission to the end of the street.

"Let's go after him," Hobi says and they all nod as the maknaes look at their hyungs in confusion.

"What happened?" Taehyung asks

"Did she turn hyung down?" Jimin questions

"Is Rap Mon-hyung okay?" Jungkook asks in a small voice, his lips curling inward as he bites them nervously.

Jin sighs as he leads the younger boys to walk in the direction where Namjoon was headed. Wrapping an arm around Jungkook's shoulder he looks at them and simply says" Don't say anything alright? It didn't end the way we thought it would," he says in a quiet voice" And I think it would be best not to ask him anything related to Y/n for now. "

"What happened then?" Jimin asks him, still walking. Hobi and Yoongi were already ahead, trying to catch up with Namjoon's fast paced, angry stomps on the pavement. As Jin told the stories to the maknaes and watched the sadness and pity in their eyes grow, Namjoon was already at the park and was being to climb the big tree.

"Uhh... Namjoon-ah, please be careful," Hobi says nervously as he looks at Yoongi who also had no idea how to stop the brokenhearted boy from climbing the tree.

"Namjoon-ah, careful!" Yoongi yells "Please! I have no fucking idea how I'm going to explain to your parents why you're doing what you're doing right now if you get hurt climbing a damn tree because of a broken heart!"

"Oh shit," Jin yells as he heards the last bit of Yoongi's sentence "Namjoon-ah, get back down here!" he yells his neck and ear turning red from the fear and the anger he was feeling for the most clumsy person he's ever known his entire life climbing said tree.

"What is hyung doing?" Jungkook asks

"Don't you dare ever follow his footsteps kid, you could, but don't do reckless shit he does," Yoongi warns the youngest.

"I'm calling Bang PD-nim and Sejin-nim" Jin announces as he pulls out his phone to call their producer, but his actions were stopped when the loudest sound he's heard in his life made him drop his phone on the sand, startled.

"YAAAAAAHH!!! FUCKING BASTARD!!!" Namjoon yelled from the highest point of the tree that he was able to cry. He was breathing heavily, on the verge of crying "YOU JUST HAD TO TAKE YOUR FUCKING SWEET TIME, HUH?!" He yelled at the open air at himself "THERE YOU GOD DAMN GO, YOU IDIOT! YOU FUCKING LOST YOUR CHANCE TO DATE THE GIRL YOU WANTED FOR SO DAMN LONG"

Without giving it much thought, Jungkook started climbing the other side of the tree making sure his brothers didn't see him. Namjoon stared at the maknae once he was leaning on the branch in front of him.

"What are you doing here, Jungkook-ah?" Namjoon asks him softly after he was done yelling about, looking away from him wiping a tear discreetly but Jungkook saw it "I felt bad for you, hyung, so I followed you up here instead even though Yoongi hyung told me not to." he shrugged.

Bang PD-nim and Sejin-nim arrived "Mon-ah, get down from there," Sejin-nim said "You're gonna get hurt!"

"What's the maknae doing there with him?" Bang PD-nim ask Hobi and Yoongi who suddenly look around them only to find the maknae missing.

"You little brat!" Yoongi yelled "I told you not to climb the tree,"

"Don't worry, hyung," Jungkook called back, "I'd do the same for all of you," then turned towards Namjoon "What happened with Y/n, hyung? I thought you'd be happier when you returned."

Namjoon took another deep breath "She uh..." he cleared his throat before continuing, he felt like he was running out of air to breathe because of what he had witnessed earlier "She was with another guy, they're probably dating. She never told me that she was seeing someone else."

Jungkook bit on his lip as he listened to his hyung explain what happened when he was about to leave the car, go up to her and ask her out on a date but was rudely interrupted by a man who seemed to have already taken his place. After a few more minutes talking to Jungkook, thanks to his distraction, Bang PD-nim and Sejin-nim were up to date on what was going on and decided to make him face the music so to speak. Y/n arrived at the park, she was on a date with Armand, the exchange student who she's been seeing for months in secret, when she got a call from the boys' manager and cut the date short when they said that Namjoon was on a tree. It was enough to send her in a panicked frenzy to leave the date abruptly to somewhat save her best friend.

"Namjoon-ah," she called from where the other men were standing. Namjoon's dragon shaped eyes widened and his lips slightly pursed as his gaze shifted from Jungkook slowly to looking below him where Y/n stood, a panic-stricken look on her face and sadness in her eyes.

"Namjoon-ah, please get down here before you hurt yourself," she half begged half demanded

"Don't worry about me, I'm okay," Namjoon tries to reassure her

"Joonie-ya," she calls out to him, so far she's the only one who calls him that and he's allowed it because he has feels for her "I don't know what exactly happened, but you didn't have to climb a tree because you're mad that the girl you like didn't go out with you," behind her, Namjoon saw Yoongi was mouthing that she doesn't know it's her and Jin was giving him a thumbs up that all was well.

"Just get down here and let's talk about it if you wanna," she offers "if not, well... just write a song about it and rip it off like a band aid. You'll move on, Joonie, you'll love someone else, and I promise they'll love you back"

"That's not what I want, Y/n-ssi" he tells her "I don't want anyone else, all I want in this world is y-"

"Ya, Namjoon-ah" Hobi yells out to him, enough to cut his sentence before he said something he wasn't ready to say yet and Hobi's voice was loud enough for Y/n not to hear the end of what Namjoon said "Get down here before we call the firefighters to get you back down here!"

"Joonie-ya," Y/n called out to him one last time "We don't always get what we want, some of us just happen to be lucky. I just left my date alone because they said you're up, stuck on a tree like a stubborn cat."

"Y-you did that? W-why?" Namjoon stuttered "Because you're important to me Namjoon-ah!" she yells back at him, "And right now, I'm pissed because I didn't get to eat! Now get down here so we could go back to your dorm so I can cook Jjajjangmyeon for all of us, or you could just stay there are starve. You look like a dumb dragon perched on a small tree, you punk. I can't believe I'm yelling at an Idol who's stuck on a damn tree like a cat," she stomps her foot on the ground. The men around them watching the interaction found it funny that Hobi was taking a video for future purposes, mainly friendly blackmail. What made Hobi laugh was the way Y/n walked out of the park and headed for the grocery, maknae's (minus Jungkook) following her. When they were out of earshot Bang PD-nim chuckled at the sight before turning to Jin "Guess you only needed her help, get the receipt from the grocery and let me know her bank account to give her a refund. Get your groceries too," he says pulling out a couple of bills and handing it to him "Just in case." then he turned to the man on the tree "Namjoon-ah, get down there and take your girl's advice," he calls out to him grinning and he walks back to his car with Sejin-nim. That evening, Y/n cooked dinner with the help of Jin, Yoongi and Hobi. Despite the cramped space, they were able to walk back and forth in circles and prepare dinner. Namjoon was sitting in front of Y/n, he watched her with sad eyes as he ate. He didn't know whether he was supposed to break everything in his path or just cry, and it wasn't until she left the dorm that Namjoon went back to the nearest convenience store with notebook and ballpen on hand. After two cups on coffee, he wrote about how he felt into two songs, one of them later down the line gave them their first award and a gave them a lot of recognition, the other one... was something that he wanted tell her. But told himself that when they record the song he wanted it to sound almost like haunting accusation.

"I need you and run." he says to himself, cocking his head to the side sighing, he mutters "Please get the message," only to be disappointed that she didn't know it was about her.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

"Hey, earth to Namjoon," you called out to him smiling "you still there?"

"Yeah, sorry," Namjoon shook the memory from his head a d chuckled "Sorry, I had a mini flashback that's all,"

"Ooh," she leans forward, elbows on the desk and a hand on her cheek "What's it about?"

"Remember when I went up a tree? After this girl didn't go out with me."

She thought about it for a second before she laughs "Is that the one where I cooked Jjajjangmyeon for us and you looked like you were gonna cry on your food?"

"Wait," his eyes widened slightly "You saw that?"

"It's hard not to see it, Joonie," she smiles sympathetically "Your aura screamed that you were heartbroken that's why I cooked, because if I remember it right, it's your comfort food in some sort of way"

Namjoon nods, he felt the exact same thing when your engagement was announced, and he went up the same tree again. To his surprise, the other members followed him and the maknae did exactly what he did that day, he went up the tree. But he didn't scream out his frustrations and their stay didn't last long because this time he came down without your help, and this time he cried in front of his brothers. Telling them that he's lost his chance with you.

"I still am," he admits "Not being loved in return by someone who you've loved for all those years is heart breaking." She nodded. Namjoon asks for the bill and as they get into Namjoon's car, he asks the driver to drop off Y/n first.

They were in front of the villa she was renting with her family and friends, including him and the other members, when Namjoon decided to end his pain. Ripping off a band aid, like she said.

"There's something I have to say, but there are two promises I need to know you'll keep as I tell you this story. The first promise is that you let me say everything on one go and ask me questions later,"

"Alright..." she trailed off hesitant "Go ahead?"

Taking a deep breath, Namjoon had a moment where he thought about letting it go and never letting her know, but there was also that selfish part of him that was begging to be let out. And he liked listening to that part of him.

"I was gonna ask this girl out years ago," he stared at her "I was ready to go out with her after knowing her for years. I've been... In love with her for the past fifteen years; that's from the moment I met her until today." he stopped gaging her reaction and so far so good, she was intently listening, so he continued.

"I met her in English classes." he bites his lip, knowing she's going to finally know how he's felt after all these years, and he didn't know what else to do other than let his mouth run, so he looked away from her. Watching the light of the room that she's staying in, the room that was joined with his, only to be divided by a large bathroom.

"She was wearing her uniform, with a lavander and gray hoodie on top, which made it easier for me to find her. You see I had a crush on her, she's really smart and well spoken, gentle and kind, full of light and laughter, and most of all she had kindness I could never compare to anybody else. When I finally walked up to her, I pretended not to know what our homework was to have an excuse to have her look at me past the glasses and the awful haircut, and you did, " he smiles at the memory before quickly glancing at her. She was slightly wide eyed with his last statement making him look at his hands, suddenly they were very interested to look at.

"I never asked you back then because... do you even remember how I looked like?! I had a bowl cut, it wasn't really hot or cool. So, I told myself, once we get into college I'll ask you out. But it took a while before college was something that I really had to do. I had to work first, we debuted and had to work even harder, I did everything I could to keep you. But that day, I had a bouquet of your favorites, peonies and sunflowers. I was in Jin-hyung's car with him, Yoongi and Hoseok, we showed up at the university. We came home from tour that day and I was really excited to see you, but instead I met you in a different circumstance. You kissed Armand right before I could even get out of the car, and I felt my heart shatter. Jin-hyung drove back to the dorm and we all walked to the park where you saw all of us. I ate dinner with a broken heart because I took too long to ask you out. I wrote songs about you. I need you and run were written that evening. Serendipity, Trivia: Love, Home, The truth untold, they're all about you and for you.

"I've been in love with you for these past fifteen years and I'm such a coward that I never told you in person and now you're going to get married to somebody else" he bit his lip as tears pooled in his eyes "It's so cliché for someone to fall in love with their best friend but what can I do, I'm just a human being who happens to be in love with you and now I'm losing you,

"I lost you to him," he looks out the window, he refuses to look at her not knowing that she too was crying at the secret that he's kept for so long. She's never seen him harshly wipe his tears away in frustration before except for time when the group was deciding on breaking up which never happened.

"I don't expect you to feel the same way or to back out of the wedding, but I wanted to let you know."

"Why now?" she asks in a small voice, Namjoon barely heard her if it wasn't for the silence ringing out in the car "Because the feeling has been eating me up. It's selfish of me do this because you're getting married in less than 12 hours, I know that. But you know me better than I know myself, baby." he whispers the endearment, not knowing she heard him.

Y/n turned to open the door, before she could get a foot out the door Namjoon speaks behind her "I might not stay for the entire ceremony tomorrow, I can't stand there in the aisle behind your husband to be and watch the two of you seal your marriage and your vows with a kiss, wishing it was me instead. I just can't,

"And I'm staying out of your lives, you'll never hear from me again in person. Consider it a wedding present." he states as Y/n finally gets out of the car, but not without closing the door with a bit more force than the usual. Namjoon flinched as his heart breaks, watching his security guard hold out an umbrella for her as it started raining heavily, quietly he lets his tears fall.

"Sir?" his driver asks hesitantly. Namjoon's driver has been around for 7 years now, so he has seen how madly in love Namjoon was with Y/n. Everyone saw it but never said a word to Y/n about it, the would even talk about how lucky she was to have caught the attention of Namjoon even before debut day. Some of them evwn assumed at one point that they were dating because of how Namjoon would look at her lovingly whenever she wasn't looking, "She'll come around, sir" he tries to lift the mood by giving Namjoon positive thoughts, but the only thing that would make Namjoon happy was to have her, but this was his reality and he knew that.

"Not everyone gets a happy ending," he says sad

"But destiny gives it to those who deserve it," his driver tells him

"I..." Namjoon started "I don't think I believe in destiny anymore... she... seems cruel to those she abandons..." his driver simply nodded as they drove back to the hotel.

Falling onto the bed, Namjoon stared at the ceiling letting everything he had just done marinade into his reality. Pick up his phone he quickly sends a text to his group chat with the other members before turning off his phone as notifications started coming in.

Namjoon: She knows everything. I asked the driver to leave the drive in her room earlier.

Back the house where Y/n in preparation for her wedding, everyone was fast asleep except for her mother who was waiting for her in yer room a paper bag on the table next to her.

"Oh good, you're back," she says smiling "Let's get ready for bed, you need enough rest for tomorrow,"

Nodding at her mom then at the paper bag beside her she asks, "What's that?"

"Oh, right," she lightly exclaimed "Namjoon's driver left it for you, he says it's a wedding gift." Y/n slowly opens the bag that her mom hands out before sitting beside her at the end of the bed.

Pulling out a heavy item that was as the side of a DVD but thicker.

"What is it?" her mom asks alout of curiosity, but she knew well what it was and what it possibly consisted.

With tears pooling in her eyes, she looks at her mother finally letting everything she learned tonight sink in.

"Do you think I'm making the right decision? Marrying Armand?" I ask her

"While you're very much in love with Namjoon?" she asks sighing "No. But if you're asking me for the sake of the feeling of because you just want to be married, then it's also a no.

"I love Armand, he's a great kid. Treats you right and all, but I don't think he's really ready to settle down. I have a feeling that you're just going to be an unhappy trophy wife when you get older. I even see you two probably getting divorced because I think you're only together for the sake of convenience, but I don't see you too completely in love with each other."

Y/n pulls her in for a hug, rubbing her back as she sobbed in her mother's arms, "You're the only one who knows the right answer, no one is forcing you to choose someone. It's your decision to follow your heart by following what you know in your head is right." Slowly her mom leaves her alone to rest once she's calmed down.

Picking up the hard drive she noticed two invisible sticky note on it, sitting on the chair in front of her laptop which was on a coffee table she reads the note that says,

Condition two: Before you plug this in to your laptop, promise me that you will forgive me for everything. For not telling you that I love you sooner.

I wish I did, it's something I'll regret until my dying breath. So please, humor this clumsy, old soul. Forgive me.

x. NJ.

Carefully taking them off of the surface of the drive and placing them on the empty pads of the laptop, she plugs it in only to be greeted by a password screen.

Your color of your favorite ice-cream that I'll never eat / Nature.

Letting out a chuckle and a quiet sob, she quickly types in 'green' then she had access. She was greeted with three folders each named 'Part 1- Start here', 'Part 2 - Dream of me.' and 'Part 3 - Farewell'. Deciding to respect his wishes, she opens the first folder, inside was one video entitled 'Open me' that she ended up playing. As the player loaded up, she was greeted by Namjoon's tired appearance. Chin on the palm of his hand that rested on the arm rest of his chair.

I guess this is gonna be the first video? he mutters to himself as she sighs heavily, sitting up to look straight into the camera

Okay... Hi? I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing. I just finished a whole bottle of whiskey with Yoongi hyung. He didn't exactly stop me so... I kept drinking. Today is... he pauses to look at the screen of his phone

December 28th. Y/n's breath was caught on her throat, it was the night of she announced her engagement to Armand.

Actually it's the 29th, it's past midnight. You probably know what today is - or yesterday, but I'll remind you because I'm good ol' pal of yours. he took a deep breath as he rubbed his temples You got engaged a couple of hours ago he sings sadly to himself Hence, whiskeeeyyyy. My best friend.. aside from the members... and you.

Namjoon pours the amber liquid on to a glass that had one ice, swirled it around a couple of times before drinking it in one go as if it was a shot of Soju.

I'm doing this... thing, he motions a hand to the camera as a farewell. Because you're going to belong to someone else, and that someone ain't me, baby, he takes another swig before continuing I'm gonna send you a copy of all of these, he grabs the camera from where it was placed and pointed it to the screen of his computer monitor that was showing organized folders dated by year.

I'm gonna turn this into a huge ass movie and give you a copy. Just to show you how much... I love you, he mutters the last part to himsepf probably knowing by now that the microphone picked it up. Namjoon puts the camera back to where it originally was then he looks directly at it, I'll always love you. But I wanna show you how I fell in love with you and why. I can do it in two ways: write you a song or pile all these up into a movie... or both.

He lazily grins at the camera before saying I've already done the first part, so now imma do this. Originally, I planned making this for you so that one day when I confessed my love for you and I proposed, I would play this as a proposal video or when ended up getting married, this was gonna be my wedding present. But since, neither of those are gonna happen this is gonna be my wedding and parting present for you.

He eventually stops talking and after a minute or two of spacing out he suddenly says Keep your end of the promise. Please. The second one is important. At least send me a text or tell someone to relay it to me if you don't want to talk to me directly. Just let me know you forgive me for my cowardice and for me never seeing you again.

The video ends and Y/n moves on to the enxt folder where she found a scanned file that she opens and finds a handwritten letter from Namjoon.

"You used to say you like romantic stuff like keeping pictures, handwritten notes, late night dates, random short dates, text messages about your day and sweet boba tea with snacks whenever you were sad. I gave you all that, I hope he does that and if he does hope he'll continue to do that for you even when you're old and gray, you deserve that. You deserve it."

Closing the image file, she moves on to the video and when her video player launched and the video was playing she was greeted by pictures of her with Namjoon from when they met from the first time when she transferred to Seoul. Pictures kept moving back and forth from the screen, even a few video clips played, including ones she's never seen before. The first one that surprised her was a video clip from her college orientation, the boys were already quite known around the country and they were already making a name for themselves abroad, and Namjoon surprised her by traveling back home to South Korea even just for a day to see her, months before he had to be convinced to get down from a tree. In the video, the college seniors made the freshmen perform and she was singing Dream a little dream of me, a song Namjoon knew but a talent he never knew she had. He was with Hobi when they sneaked in the auditorium and while she was performing Hobi took a video of the whole performance backstage with her on one side and Namjoon's side profile on the other. He was staring, jaw dropped at the sight before him. He was in love with her, that was the moment he fell and Hobi pointed it out as everyone applauded when Y/n performance ended.

"Holy shit, Hoba," he gapes

"Is that your girl, Namjoon-ah?" Hobi asked only to catch Namjoon's reaction on camera as he slowly nods and mutters "yeah... that's my girl right there... " Y/n heart dropped when she heard his words. The had to go back a few times when he said it, she wanted to believe it... so bad. Every picture was now a pulling at her heart strings and it was past midnight when she got to the last folder containing a video entitled 'Farewell.', and not having any other choice, she played it. Recognizing the background of the the hotel in Las Vegas when they had their concert for Permission to dance, she knew the video was fairly recent.

Hey, me again. Probably for the last time by the time you watch this. I'm not sure if I wanna watch you exchange vows with him tomorrow. I don't have the heart or the guts to face that, call me a coward all you want. Call me all the names you want to. I'm pretty sure I deserve it. he sighs, leaning back on his chair and stretching his largs arms out. I'm tired, but you came today to surprise us. He doesn't know you're here, and I love you for that, breaking all your rules for me, and it's taking everything in me to stop myself from knocking at your door that's across mine; to kiss you senseless and make you forget he ever existed but I have to stop myself he chuckles, shaking his head slightly so for tonight, before you join me in my museum hopping adventure across the country, I'll stay up wishing, hoping, praying even, that you will come knocking at my door asking if you could sleep over because your room feels weird. You used to do that when you joined us on tour for Love Yourself, you spent your entire summer vacation with us and I loved every minute of your presence. Even as you slept next to me in my hoodie.

He stops talking for a good second as he reminisces and he before he continued, he looked directly at the camera as if looking directly at Y/n and says I want to see you grow old beside me like that. But if I ever get the guts to see you one last time, may it be on the day of your wedding or the night before as long as you know how I feel about you. Whether you accept it or not, return it or, most likely, not. I'll live the rest of my days knowing that I never find anyone else who will make me feel the way you did, and I'll never look at another woman the way I look at you. If I were to be selfish, I want you. You. You are all I'll ever want to live in this world, fuck air... fuck water... fuck food, man. You. Are. All. I. Want. And. Need. You're my everything, from the day I laid eyes on you I knew you were the one, all it took was for you to sing Dream a little dream for me to realize I was in love with you. But I was too late. And here we are. Me, watching you be another man's wife. You, watching me do all of this, just to ask for your forgiveness and to never get mad me for being a coward and not telling you all this sooner. I love you, Y/n. I don't understand why you can't see that... Namjoon' places his head in his hands as he starts crying, Y/n started crying wondering herself if she was making the right decision marrying Armand just to be an unhappy trophy wife in the future. I love you so much, I don't want you to marry him but I love you too much to disrespect your wishes and stop you from marrying him. That should be me, jagiya... you know that I don't exactly like him but I know you know what's best for you. So I'll let you go. Your happiness is all I want to see.

Harshly wiping his tears away, he says his goodbye I'll always be here when you need me, you know where to find me. And I'll still welcome you with open arms, as if all of this never happened. I'll wait. I'll always wait for you to come back home. But for now... farewell, baby. Namjoon blows a kiss at the camera before turning it off.

Y/n did go to his room that night complaining that the bed was uncomfortable whuch was true and that it was too cold, that was a white lie to steal a hoodie and he let her willingly. When she asked why his eyes were glassy, he waived it off saying he was really sleepy and tired, and she bought it. Y/n cried harder, muffling her loud sobs with the throw pillow that she was hugging while she was watching their videos.

She didn't cry because she because she knew deep down tonight was the last time she saw Namjoon, but she cried because for the first time since she met Armand, she knew she didn't fully love him.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

Bright light greeted Y/n when her mother and the bridesmaids pulled the curtains open letting the sunlight pour in, she spent the whole night crying as she rewatched all of the videos until she fell asleep at past 4am.And it wasn't even 5 hours since she was lulled to sleep.

"Good morning sunshine!!!" her maid of honor and best friend yelled, but stopped in their tracks when they saw her puffy face and reddish eyes "What in the world happened to you? You're not sick are you?!" she exclamed. Y/n shook her head saying that she just couldn't sleep, but the other ladies in the room knew otherwise. However, they decided not to comment on it.

Getting up to bathe, she tried her best to depuff her face specifically her eyes which felt very warm. While her make up was done and most of the swelling went down, Y/n eyes started tearing up and her lips started to quiver making the make-up artist stop to look at her mother and best friends for help, and help they did. Every one was rushed out of the room, once the door was shut Y/n couldn't help but cry harder than she did in the early morning. No words of comfort helped until her dad arrived, "I thought you had a wedding to prepare for, what's going on?" he asked concerned, as he closed the door and made his way to his daughter to pull her in a hug one her best friend asks "Is this about Namjoon?"

Y/n's head shot up as she looked up at her, "W-why would you ask that?" Y/n asks

"I saw him drop you off last night, I'm guessing the dinner didn't go because of the way I woke up past midnight and heard you crying in your room," she holds Y/n hand "When are you both going to stop being idiots?" Y/n mom asks

"Hey," he chuckles at his wife, arms still wrapped around his daughter in a hug "we're still idiots even at this age, the correct question is 'when are they going to stop being blind to what they really feel'."

Y/n stood up and walked towards her laptop bringing it to where her parents were sitting. Playing the videos her parents and best friend's reaction didn't change. Y/n kept her eyes on the floor, thanking God that they had enough time to spare before they did the first look of the bride and groom an hour before the wedding. Y/n parents looked at each other with a knowing look before looking at their daughter who was now quietly letting her tears stain the bathrobe and camisole she was wearing.

"Do you forgive him like he asked?" her mom asks to which she nods

"Do you love him back?" her dad asks to which she nods her head repeatedly and cries some more this time her sobs were heard throughout the room as her parents pull her in for a hug.

Back at the hotel, the rest of the boys were trying to convince Namjoon to get dressed but he just sat on the couch refusing to move, and none of them made an effort to make him stand up , not even Jungkook.

"Come on, man," Hobi says "You have to be there, call it a last glimpse or a last look at her. You'll never see her again after today,"

"I already said goodbye, Hoba," Namjoon said in a low whisper like voice "I don't need to do it in person,"

"Hyung," Jimin started "You told her she can ask questions right, then let her ask today, you might even get a chance to know if she forgave you,"

"Think about it, Namjoon-ah," Jin says as he fixes his neck tie "You'll get to keep the image of her walking down the aisle towards you forever embedded in your memory," Taehyung was able to tell off the eldest for being to mean but Jimin stops him before he could. Jin had a plan, and it was definitely worked the way Namjoon stayed silent before he slowly got up to head back into his room and they heard the shower running.

When they made it to the church, everyone was chatting about how beautiful the wedding was and how they couldn't wait to see the bride and groom. Namjoon sighs heavily for what felt like the hundredth time and it was just the afternoon. Namjoon sat down with the rest of Y/n friends and family, he didn't want to be there, but Jin somehow convinced him to. For an unknown reason, he wanted that. He wanted the image of Y/n walking down the aisle looking like a blooming bride in his memory until his dying breath.

Back in the villa where the first look was about to take place, Armand stood facing a tree covered with sheer golden ribbons and fairy lights reminding him of Christmas ribbons put on trees for decoration. Y/n was in the hallway having a word with one of production staff filming the wedding and the photographer, though her parents managed to get her in the wedding dress she didn't look quite happy as she wanted to be.

"It doesn't feel right," she comments when her mom was right in front of her fixing her dress

Her mom hummed "That's because you've been in love with your best friend and didn't even know it until last night," she smiles "You know the right thing to do, your dad and I raised you well to know what's right and to choose what makes you happy. You're a smart woman, you'll figure it out,"

And now, staring at her fiance's back she knew what to do.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

Namjoon was on his third glass of champagne when they announced that the wedding was about to begin. With the glass being snatched away from him by Jimin, who drank it all in one go before returning it to the waiter that walked by.

"That was mine," he slightly glared at Jimin "Well, it's in my stomach now having a party with the hors d'oeuvres," he smiles at him smugly. Namjoon decided to drop the topic trying his best not to get too pissed or he was going to lose his mind and temper.

As soft music starts playing, everyone turns around to watch the entourage except for Namjoon, he stares straight ahead and when the groom finally takes his place their eyes meet. Armand nods at him and Namjoon returns it. When the maid of honor, your best friend was finally done walking the aisle, everine was patiently waiting for Y/n, but the modernized wedding march didn't play making the six members look at each other confused when Jungkook tells them she's at the door of the ceremony area. He even pointed it out, making them turn around discreetly and he was right, ends of your wedding dress was peeking at the foggy glass near the base of the door. It would appear for a second then it would disappear only to appear a few seconds later, Jungkook felt nervous for the groom but a part of him was happy. He knew you were pacing. Biting his lip to stop himself from disrespectfully smirking at the groom, he looks down to close his eyes from anyone seeing his hopefulness, but the other members except for Namjoon knew what he was thinking as the look each other with smiling eyes. Namjoon's farewell and last appearance did more than just evoke emotions that she's buried years ago. It was, at mere moments before her wedding, making her choose what she knew was right.

Behind the closed door, Y/n paced as she thought about what she was going to say. Her dad was relaxed but concerned with her pacing. It was a good ten minutes before she looked at her dad and finally nodded. He didn't know what was going on inside her head but he trusted her and her decisions. He just prayed she had known earlier so they didn't have to worry too much about spending on a wedding like this. Taking her dad's arm, the wedding planner and production team already knew what was about to happen but they weren't too worried.

As the wedding march played, Namjoon and Armand's eyes meet one last time, and Armand mouths something at him that he didn't quite understand, it made Armand chuckle and instead pointed at him mouthing you followed by a thumbs up. Still not understanding he turns around to look at Y/n who was a few feet away from him. The sight of her made him gasp quietly, Jin was right and he was glad he listened. It was worth it to see her in white walking down the aisle and remember it for the rest of his life. She looked beautiful it was painful to look at her, he wanted to tear his eyes away from her gaze, but didn't have the heart to look at the love of his life be a vision in white and ignore it.

Y/n was surprised when she spotted Namjoon standing with the rest of the members and her family. She kept her eyes on him until he turned to look at her and for the first time since she turned away from what she felt for him, she finally realized why she fell in love with him all those years ago. When Y/n finally reached the end the aisle, she and Armand smiled at each other before facing the pastor and before he could even get a eord out Armand beat him to it, "Give us a second please," he whispered which surprised the pastor but none the less respected it, turning to Y/n who was staring in space he gently calls her name making her turn to him slowly. Giving her a kind, small smile and nod he says "Go ahead, I'll take care of everything. You don't need to worry about it. I was the one who dragged you into this in the first place."

Y/n looked up at him with teary eyes, "But..."

"Remember what I said an hour ago?" he asks to which she nods in response "Do it."

Turning around, he faces their guests lightly touching her elbow as a way of letting her know she can go, and when he chuckles and tells her to go without making a second thought she grabs the however many yards of tulle of her wedding dress and runs for the exit.

"And she finally lives her Julia Roberts moment," he shakes his head in disbelief as he laughs while everyone gasps at Y/n's actions.

"Everyone calm down, it's okay," Armand reasures them. The seven boys including Namjoon who felt a chill down his spine looks back and forth between the groom and the door that Y/n just disappeared off to. While the entire guests were speaking amongst each other in loud volumes, Armand makes his way towards Namjoon grinning like a fool, "Go after her," he says making Namjoon stare it him as if he's lost his mind

"What?!" Namjoon says in disbelief that is sounded as if he squeaked "What the fuck are you going on about?"

"Just go. Go find her, you know where. Tell her hiw you really feel," Armand says

"I have no clue what you're talking about, man," he denies

"Stop lying to me and to everyone including yourself, Namjoon," Armand exclaimed with a chuckle "We all know you love her, and she's in love with you,"

"That-... that is not true," Namjoon denies once more "She's supposed to be marrying you,"

"Out of convenience because I needed to get married for my father to pass the business on to me and she knew that from the beginning!" he interrupts Namjoon "We fell in love but I she stayed because she was heartbroken after seeing you with somebody else!" The other six boys who were listening were finding the story entertaining and they listened intently with wide eyes and jaws dropped.

"Y/n has been in love with you even before I met her, she's told me that but when she saw all of you in a club and you were with another girl, she got jealous and told me she doesn't love you anymore. But, brother, I know the look she gives you and the looks you give her when no body else is looking, now go. You know exactly where to find her, "

" Go! " the other members start yelling at him and start pushing him towards the exit

"Hey bro," Y/n best friend yells out "Bring her back here and get married or I'm marrying Jungkook,"

"Hurry back, please," Jungkook whispers at him before pushing him to the exit, all the members behind him. Namjoon's driver was already waiting for him in the car at the valet and as soon as he sits his driver gives him a loud laugh as he drives to the main road yelling "I told you so!" as they sped away, not knowing the other members were all packed up like sardines in a car following them.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

Y/n walked the halls of high school that he and Namjoon attended back when they were teenagers. It was pouring outside and she didn't bring a jacket or change out of her dress when she ran away. The students who saw her asked her if she was okay and why she was crying, explaining that they were tears of joy they waited on the roof of the school's entrance until their parents picked them up. Not being able to enter the school she walked around the building until she reached a nearby gazebo, the exact spot where she and Namjoon first locked eyes and exchanged awkward smiles at each other. The ends of her dress were turning brown with all the rainwater and mud she ran into, she was thankful that even though she was wearing heels they were closed shoes protecting most of her feet from rain.

Sitting on the gazebo bench, she leans down to take off her shoes, massaging her feet as she places both of it on the bench as she sat sideways. She was quite thankful that she was able to grab a taxi that took her halfway to the school with a small amount of money her best friend put in the pockets of her dress. Yes, she had her dress customized to have pockets and she was glad that it came in handy. Gazing out into the football field, she thought about how her body and her mind dragged her there. It was an unconscious thing that she did. Whenever she fought with Namjoon or Armand, or anyone for that matter, they would always find her here sitting on the gazebo. It was what Hobi called a Safe Zone, somewhere no one could get mad or attack her. It was her second safe zone anyway, first being Namjoon, but she stopped running to Namjoon unless she was devastated. He was the only one who was able to comfort her in ways Armand couldn't and he knew that.

That's why when he heard the faint footsteps of Y/n behind her, he had an inkling that the wedding wasn't going to happen from the way he saw her crying as she ran up the stairs and how devastated Namjoon looked as the car drove away. He knew that she finally found out that Namjoon was in love with her and he was okay with that, he accepted it. He even went up to her room hours after she arrived, he was about to knock on the door when he heard a loud sob and her quiet cries. He knew from that moment that the time he feared arrived but he wasn't angry, he was sad not for himself but for the both of them. For a precious friendship possibly broken.

"Armand?" she quietly calls for him making turn around and seeing her in her dress he thought she'd make a beautiful bride but not for him. Shaking her head with tears in her eyes, she starts apologizing to him.To her surprise, Armands steps forward and wraps his arms around her, rubbing her back gently "I know, I know. It's okay," he tries to soothe her "You can cry, it's okay. It's just us." And he let her. For a good few minutes he let her cry, tears staining his suit but he didn't mind.

"What am I supposed to do?" she asked when finally got the chance to breathe

"I'm not really sure what to tell you, Y/n, because as much as I want to marry you 'cause I love you and I can't force you to marry me when we both know that you're really in love with him."

"How come every one knows that?"

"Because we've all seen signs but chose to ignore it or shrug it off, simply because of the fact that we're dating. But every one could see right through the two of you, even I did.

"I'm not mad at you for being in love with him while you were with me, I just wished you realized sooner. It would've been less miserable and less painful for you both." he admitted, taking her hand he kisses her knuckles "I accept if you don't want to go through with the wedding anymore, but please do me a favor and walk down the aisle so they wouldn't think you just bailed on the wedding. You can run away right before everyone sits down. Just look around for a bit, you put a lot of hard work planning what you wanted,

"It just so happens that it's with the wrong guy," he smiles "Go be happy, love." he leans forward to kiss her forehead "You deserve happiness with the man you truly love,"

Namjoon asked to be dropped off at Y/n apartment thinking she would be there but tye receptionist mentioned that she didn't see Y/n enter the building making Namjoon runnto his building that was next door to see if she was waiting by his front door only to be disappointed. Walking back to the car he finally spots the car behind his driver and walks up to it, only to find his brothers squeezed in between the two rows of the Starex.

"What are you guys doing here?" he asks eyebrows pulling together

"Did you really think we were going to let run out to look for her on your own?!" Yoongi shot back at him "How in the world were you going to look for her?"

"You went to the most obvious places she would never go" Jin pointed out "She would never go back to her place or yours, it's not a great idea to wind down in a closed off area,"

"Well where do you think she went if you all think you're damned geniuses?" Namjoon exclaimed out of frustration "She's out in the middle of Seoul all alone in a fucking wedding gown and it's raining!"

"Watch your language, Namjoon-ah," Jin said in a stern voice that he rarely uses on his younger brothers "You don't have to be mad at us when all we're trying to do is help," Namjoon immediately backed down not wanting the eldest to be upset with him.

"I just..." he started "I need to find her, she gets sick easily and I don't want her to get hurt, she's out there all alone-"

"You're not kids anymore, Namjoon-ah," Yoongi tells him "She could handle herself, but I know what you mean about her being alonenand needing to find her asap. So start using that brain of yours to think about where she could go, somewhere only the two of you would know.

"There are so many places we went to over the past fifteen years, how am I supposed to remember all of them?" he says in a panic as a thunder rumbles above them

"Do you think she'd go to hyung's parents?" Jimin asks them

"To Ilsan?" Namjoon asks "It's too far away, and she wouldn't go there knowing my parents aren't..." he stops mid-sentence, looking at the road seeing that there wasn't too much traffic ahead, he was mentally calculating time

"What's wrong, hyung?" Taehyung asks him, looking at where he was looking

"Home," Namjoon finally says in a quiet voice "Home. I know where she is," he says in a firmer voice before running back to his car and tells the driver where to go and his brothers follow right behind him.

~~~~~^^~~~~~~~~^^^^

"I swear we're gonna get arrested, Namjoon-ah," Y/n says in a panic holding his hand in a death grip, but he didn't mind. They're both usually paired up together with a senior back in high school because of how clumsy and heavy-handed, but Y/n was naturally clumsier than heavy-handed, that talent was something that Namjoon excelled in. But what they're doing was completely reckless.

"It's not breaking and entering, babe," he teases, Y/n blushed at the endearment hiding her face on his shoulder "The gazebo is outside and the place isn't even gated, it's practically part of the park's property if you follow the invisible line"

"I don't care, out school thinks it theirs I'm not disrespecting their decisions considering the fact that I need to graduate and not get expelled or arrested for trespassing,"

"Let them try," he mutters as they walk nearer to the gazebo

"You're an idiot," she sighs "We both are..."

"Welcome home, baby," he jokes as they step into the gazebo, their surroundings were only lit by the moonlight and a street lamp "The baby's all tucked in bed and fast asleep,"

"Keep joking around like that and you just might have to marry me,"

"Don't dare me," he chuckles "It's gonna be your problem, I'm not Jin hyung or Yoongi hyung. I won't be able to cook for you,"

"Or keep the place clean," you laugh

"Ya!" he exclaimed too loudly making him cover his mouth and Y/n silently laughs "You're lucky you don't live with us,"

"What are you going to do?" she dared "Vacuum the place in the early morning? You must have forgotten that I'm a heavy sleeper,"

"You sleep like Jungkook, nothing can wake you up except for food," he smiles as he comfortably places his arm on the bench behind her. Behind them was a fence that separated the school from the park where there was a couple by the swing set.

"You know we could just get married and not tell anyone," he tries to dare her "The city hall isn't that far all we gotta do is wait for the next available date,"

"You're crazy," she chuckled "Focus on your debut and your dream, not to mention you have to finish school and all. When you're done with all of that, let's talk weddings and marriage, and every thing in between,"

"How about we live together till then?" he proposed "We'll have a little house, maybe two bedrooms one for us, the other for an office and maybe in the future it will turn into a nursery,"

"You're too drunk," she laughs off his offer nit knowing how serious he was "We should have stayed with soju instead of shifting gears to whiskey,"

"I'm serious," he protests eyes wide as he gently places another hand on the table, leaning closer to her "We could get married when I've saved up for a wedding you want once the debut becomes a success,"

"Namjoon-ah," she started "Listen to what you're saying. This isn't a joke, we have our own dreams to make come true. Are you absolutely sure you want to start family before you could even stand on your own two feet? Bangtan's debut is next week and you're thinking about getting married,

"If does become a success, you won't have time for a relationship let alone a family of your own until the dust has settled," she watches Namjoon's reaction as he looks away from her, he knew he should have confessed earlier before Bang PD-nim announced their upcoming debut. But deep down, he knew she was right. However, he was persistent he wanted to be with her before someone else could step in. He had a feeling he was going to lose her once his focus fully shifts to being the leader of Bangtan.

"For now, we can enjoy this friendship," she says smiling as she was rubbing his shoulder, but Namjoon thinks that it was his heart that needed to be in your touch to heal from this rejection "and we could call this little gazebo 'home' if you want. Our 'little home', a place only we know and the only place we can truly be ourselves and be comfortable."

"This gazebo is home if you're here," he partially agrees with her "If you're not here, this is just another gazebo. You're my home, Y/n,"

"Ditto, nerd," she sighs resting her head on the shoulder she was rubbing. Placing a small kiss on his shoulder she whispers "Go win their hearts, Namjoon-ah. I know the seven of you guys are gonna make it big. You have something others don't,"

"Hmm... And what would that be?"

"Passion, patience, determination, one dream and the best part, you have each other." Y/n smiles to herself, "But the biggest flex your team has is that they have you as their leader, it takes a great team to succeed, but a great leader will make a great team succeed be even better,

So, believe me when I say you'll make it big. And I'm gonna be right behind you, watching all of you reach your dreams and live it" she said proudly.

Namjoon let the tears flooding his eyes fall as he kisses the top of her head. He knew that he had to succeed to make her proud, he finally compromised with himself that he should make her proud and come back to her when the right time comes.

"Just don't forget about me, Joonie," she teases "I'll forever be your number one fan,"

"Don't be ridiculous, Y/n-ssi. You're going to be right next to me the whole ride, you gonna be with me all the time. I'll make sure of it."

That early morning, Namjoon walked her back to her dorm before going back home to his dorm. Not completely happy about being rejected by Y/n, but feeling more determined. It was like adding wood to a campfire, add more and the fire becomes bigger, that fire was his determination. Little did he know, she was gonna end up moving om with her life without him as he focused more and more on his job.

"YA! I've been looking everywhere for you," a voice says behind Y/n making her turn around quickly as she snaps out of her thoughts. Namjoon always thought that she never remembered that night because of how drunk she was, but that was the evening that Y/n found out that she had a pretty high tolerance with alcohol that over the years whenever the boys got drunk, Yoongi and Y/n would be the last ones standing. A secret that Yoongi kept, knowing that it would be a useful talent of hers in the future, and, man was he right .

"Do you know how fucking worried I was about you?!" he asks her his tone indicating a hint of anger with the concern laced in his voice "You could get sick with how reckless you are. Can't you see it's pouring and you're in a fucking dress?!" Standing in the rain, Namjoon's chopped blonde hair was wet and so was his dress shirt and coat. Y/n couldn't place the look he had in his face, no doubt he looked worried and mad, but there was something else. Longing, she decided, and hope. Both a very dangerous combination.

"Go home, Namjoon-ah," she says through the the noise of the rain splattering on the roof of the gazebo and the pavement "You don't have to worry about me, I'll just grab a bus home."

"Like hell you are," he scoffed "And I'm not done talking"

Y/n wanted to take her shoes and throw it at him, and she was seconds from doing so. Not like it was the first time she threw a shoe at him.

"What the hell happened?" he asks and she rolled her eyes "Why did you run away from the wedding? People are getting more and more worried about you, you should go back and get dried up. Armand sent me to get you."

"He didn't send you, dad did." Y/n says "Dad was the last person to talk to Armand before I walked down the aisle. So, it's most likely dad.

And don't fucking ask me what happened when you were the one who sent a hard drive filled of videos of you getting trashed," she started fuming "Stop pretending like you didn't say the things you said last night to put me where I am right now, you little piece of shit!" she grabbed her shoe and hurled it at his direction aiming for his head only to surprise her when he ducked to the side and dodged it like a pro making the boys in the car who were watching the entire thing happening with Jungkook and Hobi taking videos, howl at how impressive it was.

"Oooh!," Hobi chuckled "Oh he's gonna be in trouble for dodging that one!" all of them laughed as Jimin asked "We're such bad friends for filming this,"

"Hey, now," Jin said from the passenger seat "At least we came to support him, and we're not just his friends, we're family too,"

"You measly little fucker," Y/N gritted as she threw another one this time the show landed on his muscled bicep "You dare," she threw a bracelet she was wearing "fucking" she struggled with taking the viel from her head before bundling it into a ball and throwing it at him "dodge me. You asshole!" From the car, Hobi snort-laughed as they continued filming "Told you," making Jimin lightly hit his arm as they all chuckled.

"Call me whatever you want, Y/n, if it's going to make you sleep better tonight," Namjoon said to her his tone returning to how he started when he arrived "If it makes you fucking happier do it,"

"Why did you show up?" Y/n demanded as she walked up to him not caring about getting rained on, a part of Namjoon wanted to pull her back in the gazebo but he was frozen at the sight before him, just like how frozen he was in his place when she walked the aisle not less than 2 hours ago, "What made you think you could just show up?! Didn't you say you weren't going to be there? Did you finally muster up the courage to stop being god damned coward? You fucking bastard!" she yelled and cried, she was pushing him away from her over and over again, and Namjoon let her slam her fists on his chest repeatedly, but to his surprise she didn't hit him as hard as he thought she would. Gently grabbing her wrists, he wraps her arms around his torso pulling her close in a hug as he placed a hand behind her head and another one around her back. Y/n stiffened under his touch before she relaxed and quietly sobbed with her face on his coat, soaked in the rain and her tears.

Without any hesitation he places a kiss on the top of her head before gently holding her face with both hands and leaning down just so his lips were near hers, but he didn't move. Instead he waited for her, and when she finally understood why he didn't move and longingly stared at her lips, she did the one thing they've both been waiting for since they fell in love with each other in high school and finally, her lips met his. When Namjoon pulled away, resting his forehead on hers, he whispers to her "I'm never letting you go again. You're not going to get rid me that easily this time around," Y/n giggled as she leans up again for another kiss and Namjoon gladly kissed her back, finally tasting the lips he's been craving for so long.

Back in the car, the boys were giggling and smiling like high schoolers. Jungkook was still filming the entire thing and the audio surely caught all of their side comments and the noises they all made when they finally kissed for the first time.

"Now that," Jin pointed out his window, "Is better than any existing and upcoming dramas on TV,"

"Definitely," Yoongi smiled

"We finally don't have to deal with a grumpy Namjoon hyung," Taehyung sighed happily "Our world is finally at peace"

"You can't say that," Jungkook objected chuckling, "Now they're gonna get married and have kids, hyung. We're ginna have little Namjoons running around the office," Hobi laughed out loud, clapping as he did. Jimin stared at him with wide puppy eyes, "W-wait... But they're both clumsy," he pointed out, then he muttered to himself "that means their kids are gonna be... Aiiishh-"

Opening the window next to Hobi and pushing out most of his upper body out, not caring about the rain he yells out to the couple who we're smiling at each other through their tears that were getting mixed with the rain that was falling on them, "YA! YOU BETTER NOT BE MAKING KIDS SOON, YOU IDIOTS!" this time tue other members laughter reached their ears, the car no longer soundproof because of the opened window. Namjoon looked back at his friend and he tightened his arms around Y/n, "I got bad news for you, Jimin-ah," he smiles "You might see them sooner than you think," this time along with the sound of laughter mainly Hobi's due to his reaction to Jimin's wide eyed look at the couple, joined a few sounds of complaints mainly from Yoongi and Jin who knew immediately that they can't say no if the time comes for them to be babysitters for Y/n's kids, but decided to give complaining a try if it means it will buy them time to mentally prepare for mini-me's of the middle child of Bangtan.

Namjoon ignores the other members and turns back around to the gazebo walking towards it with his hand still holding Y/n as they sit.

"You ruined my wedding," she muttered lamely while they were seated inside the gazebo, arms still around each other.

"We'll have a better one," he promised her "that's if you want one. I mean it, what I said; I'm not letting you go again. It was the biggest mistake I made, I'm not going to make that mistake again."

"A wedding with you? And if I don't want to be with you?" she says almost in a daring manner, her chin resting on his chest as she looks up at his face

"Move in with me or start a family with me, either way, be with me; be mine and I'll be yours" He says, and at that moment Y/n recalls the early morning they got drunk and how he called the gazebo their home "I just want to be with you, that's all I want. Stay with me, please" Y/n watched Namjoon's every move and if back then he was recklessly discussing marriage with her with no clue about what the future holds for them both. Now, he knows exactly what he wants and it's to marry her, spend his life with her.

After a beat, she smiles and pulls him in to press a kiss on his cheek.

"Is that a yes?"

"Only one way to find out, Namjoon-ah" she grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Epilogue anyone?🤣) Thank you for reading, please leave you feedback in the comments or send me an ask and please reblog if you enjoyed it.

Permanent taglist (always open) :

@lovergirl1316 @buttvi @borahae-reads @lemonadecandycandy @misshale21 @damn-u-min-yoongi @tattoomom11 @chimchimmarie @katskeigo

[what-if-nct]

My friend i havent talked to in a while told me she got into kpop while we wernt talking (bc of life getting in the way. Ahhh the mid-20s...), and it's been a few months. She also likes NCT and Stray Kids! Her biases are Yangyang and Jeongin which is funny. Both menaces both maknaes both babied. Both bite. Both considered the fashionistas of the group (Jeongin has better style tho sorry YY).

Something that's always interesting to me is spotting patterns to see the type of people your friends like/date. Like how one of my friends keeps dating the same type of person or how different my taste is from my other friends'. It's interesting because it really does remind me of differences we all have as someone who's a homebody and rarely goes out. Also, interacting w people of diff sexualities, as someone who considers themself unlabeled (i think i might be a lesbian, but maybe I also like men?). It's fun and interesting! I usually don't have these types of conversations over text bc I'm a bad texter, I'm more of a talker/caller.

How about you btw? Do you like texting or calling more? :)

someone choosing Yangyang and Jeongin as their biases at the same time makes so much sense. They're really similar and I kinda wanna see they're dynamic do they mellow each other or make each other worse. I'm going with worse.

And it's really interesting to see the patterns of who your friends date and find attractive. Like my best friend kinda surprises me sometimes cause it's so varied this has been since middle school. A while ago she said I like pretty young guys and she likes old ugly guys to describe our different types. But she has a wonderful fiance now and I feel like I have two moms when I go out with them. my type has been pretty concrete except for some outliers when I was bored. But for the most part it's tall skinny guys with long hair some have had short hair. Or they're 5'5 and lower but still long hair. Seriously it's either 5'10 & up or 5'5 & below almost never any in-between. They're also more than likely anime nerds. they just all end up being anime nerds for some reason. Or stoners, whole lot of stoners. And I think it kinda bleeds into my biases cause Chan and Xiaojun are my shortest biases. Hendery and Yuta are in the middle and the rest are 5'10 and up and almost all of them have had long hair. I blame my childhood crush on Eric Matthews for that. Also blonde guys my love for blonde guys is honestly shameful. Dated too many. They've all been pretty sweet though.

And I'm okay at texting I don't mind it but I do prefer calling or talking cause I am such a talker it's easier for me to get my thoughts across. plus my train of thought changes so much that text can't keep up. A lot of times if I don't feel like texting I just send voice memos or use voice to text which I don't use often cause my speech pattern is very "So like and like but like I mean like you know right" Which in my world that is a complete sentence. But I love a good long phone call. If I could send voice memos on asks I would.

[willowfolksong]

hi i just found your blog recently, i almost finished all of the fics and i love it? you're such a talented writer! im so excited to see the next chapter of your miya twins fic btw! then i saw your request are open so im so excited to send one! may i request some angst to fluff with unrequited to requited love trope (actually it's friend to lovers too hehe) and the character is akaashi x f!reader? like they're childhood friend and he's been in love with her for a long time but he knows she's just not into that at that time like she always thought that 'the right person will come at the right time' so he still waiting for her then one day she sees akaashi differently and just realized the the right person always with her all of this time. im sorry if this is too specific>< and im sorry for my broken english too. thankyou and have a good day!🥰

paper planes and shojo manga

- Akaashi Keiji x Reader

- SFW

a/n: hi anon!!!!! first of all, don't apologize for your english!!!! I understood you perfectly! Second, thank you so much for your words. 🥺❤ I feel so happy that you think that way about my blog and my writing! And about my miya conundrum fic too!!! Honestly, thank you. I'm beyond grateful for words of love like this! ❤❤And here's your request! I'm such a sucker for unrequited to requited love, so I had the best time writing it. And dont worry about being too specific! Specific requests are the best! hope you like it and always tell me what you think and if you need anything changed!

Love,

Willow ❄

Requests are open! ❄

The first time you two meet, you have a manga book in your hands. And it's funny, because neither of you can read yet. That's why you're there, on your first day of primary school.

"I just like the pictures and the colors" you tell him, turning the page "Wanna read it with me?"

"I wouldn't call it reading if we're not actually reading" he tells you, but sits beside you nonetheless.

You talk about everything you see, pointing at every characters you think is cute and theorizing about what you think they're probably saying. He nods at all, absentmindedly.

That day, he makes his first friend.

He sits beside you, and you like to throw little paper planes at him when he's not looking, and pass him small notes with silly jokes and dumb drawings of the teacher. He keeps all of them, stuffed in the bottom of his backpack until middle school arrives, and he empties the bag on the bed and every little paper you ever passed him during class comes falling down, like snow. He looks at them— eyes scanning your handwriting in those bright colors you like to use, from the glittery pens you insist on buying. He takes them all and puts them in a jar on his desk, right next to the picture of the two of you in front of the school.

He realizes he likes you in your second year of middle school, when you start talking about boys as more than just regular people to hang around with. You still read manga— and now that you can also understand what the characters are saying, it has become more like an obsession for you, so it's in a comic book store where he first notices. He's examining a book he grabbed from a nearby shell when you come running towards him, face flushed and out of breath.

"Okay, so don't look now" you tell him, and he refrains from pointing out that he can't look at anything, since you're both surrounded by shelves "But the guy on the register is really cute"

He frowns, having lost any interest in the book in his hands "What?"

"He's really cute" you say again, giggling "I need to buy more stuff so I can spend more time in front of him"

You end up buying the two new volumes of your favorite manga series, as well as a complete new set of one you've heard people talking about, saying it was good. He stands behind you, having bought nothing for himself, as you twirl your hair around your finger and laugh at the jokes the guy working on the register makes.

Akaashi goes back home to stand in front of the mirror beside his bed. He doesn't look at all like the guy from the store. His hair and eyes are dark, and he's wearing nothing but a simple white t-shirt and some pants. He looks to the side, to the desk where he has more stuff about you than himself.

He pushes the twinge of sadness in his chest aside, in favor of texting you to see if you got home safely.

He catches you in his arms and spins you around with ease, resisting the urge to bury his nose in your hair. He's sweaty from the game, and it's already good enough that you let him hug you in your nice dress.

"You did so good Keiji! You're the best in the team!" you yell, when your feet touch the ground again, shooting an apologetic look at one of his teammates passing by your side in that exact moment.

"I wouldn't say I am the best" he says, chuckling fondly "But thank you. And I'm glad you came"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world! It's so fun to watch you play volleyball!"

"Is it?"

You vigorously nod "It is! You're also the only one that puts some passion to the game. Are your teammates even trying?"

He refrains from telling you that you're the main reason for his excitement.

You have your first date ever on your third year, arguing that it's your last chance for dating anyone from class anymore, since you'll all probably be going to different high schools.

'You could date him', he thinks while he listens to you ramble about the lucky guy, nodding along as you walk down the school hallways.

'You could date him', he thinks as he walks you home, and you insist for him to come inside with you to help you stay calm.

'You could date him', because there's a picture of the two of you during a school field trip by your bedside table, and the stuffed animal he won for you in the summer fair is resting against your pillow.

'You could date him', he says to himself, as he waves goodbye to you and watches you walk away, on your way to a date with a boy that doesn't knows about your favorite food, or color, or about the little things you do when you're nervous and everything else that makes you simply you.

You call him later, when he's already in bed and dozing off, to tell him the date didn't go as you expected, and the guy turned out to be kind of a douch bag. You're not crying, but you sound so utterly disappointed and tired that he can't just go to sleep and not do something; so he turns on his laptop and spends the night googling any new manga you haven't read yet. He ends up learning a lot about genres and styles of drawings, and when the morning light shines through his window, he has a full list of recommendations ready for you.

It's been a long time since he figured out how reading cheers you up.

He finds out about Bokuto Koutaro thanks to a high school volleyball video, in wich the passion for the game is so clear on the ace face that Akaashi actually spends the whole match following him around with his eyes, intent on every one of his moves. He decides that he will be attending Fukurodani Academy the next day, and it's beyond thrilled to find out that you'll also be going there.

"So you'll keep playing volleyball in high school then?" you ask him on your way home.

He nods "Yes, I think so"

You hum, pushing a lock of hair behind your ear "And you really want to be on Fukurodani's team because of this Bokuto guy, right?"

"Well, they do have a pretty solid team, it's not only about him" he tells you, watching as your mouth forms a perfect 'o' "But yeah... his passion for playing did impressed me. It's so different from the guys I've played with this three years"

You wink at him, amused "Should I be jealous of this guy, Keiji? The way you talk about him is too much"

He laughs and grabs his bag a little tighter. You should hear how he talks about you.

Bokuto Koutaro turns out to be more than just the guy that impressed him enough to chose to attend Fukurodani Academy. He soon becomes Akaashi's friend, and by extension yours too. He has a bubbly personality and the most loud voice Akaashi's ever heard, and his mood is as ever changing as the moon, and he can be a little overwhelming at times, but being with him is fun regardless, and soon the three of you become an inseparable trio, despite Bokuto being your senpai.

"You should tell her" Bokuto says one day after practice, completely out of the blue "Want me to tell her for you or something?"

Akaashi pauses, avoiding Bokuto's eyes because he knows, without asking, what he's refering to "I'm not following"

When Bokuto says your name, he blinks and pushes his locker room door closed "I mean, you would have to be blind not to see it"

"We're just friends"

Bokuto shrugs, both of his hands behind his back "I mean, sure. But like, the way you look at her. It's the same way I look at the ball before serving"

Akaashi laughs at the analogy, taking his stuff to go home "I bet it is"

You start dating Konoha on your second year of high school, and Akaashi stands in front of his mirror the day he finds out, the same as he did many years ago after you flirted with that guy from the comic book store. Once again, nothing but normal eyes and hair stares back at him. Konoha has blond hair. Maybe, he was always too plain for being something other than your friend.

Bokuto tries to cheer him up, and even goes as far as to give Konoha the cold shoulder for a week, until Akaashi asks him to stop, because this isn't anyone's fault. Bokuto also offers to tell you about his feelings, but Akaashi quickly dismisses that option. You don't see him as anything but your best friend, and he would never dare to ruin that.

He keeps himself busy by reading the manga he knows you like, in the places you used to hang out before your days were filled with dates and romantic escapades. He hangs around Bokuto more, plays volleyball more, and tries to put upside down the picture of the two of you he has on his desk, right next to the jar still filled with all the paper planes you sent flying towards him a long time ago. It lasts for a day, before he has to place the picture back up again.

He needs to see your face before going to sleep.

He hugs you a little too tight after his game against Eiwa High, during the Tokyo Nationals. He's thankful for Bokuto distracting everyone else on the team— including Konoha — with his yelling about winning and looking cool, and this time, Akaashi does buryes his nose on your hair.

"You were as cool as always" you tell him, leaning forward to whisper in his ear "Much more cool than Bokuto, but don't tell him I said that"

"Your secret is safe with me" he reassures you, and the two of you laugh at the same time.

"I kind of miss you, you know?" you tell him, and it's so sudenly and he's still recovering from that victory high, that your words punch all the air out of him "I'm sorry if we haven't been spending that much time together... I never realized having a boyfriend could be so draining"

"Are you happy?" he asks you, and you stop talking to look him in the eyes.

"What?"

"Are you happy?" he asks again, and he doesn't wants his thoughts to linger on how much it takes you to answer.

"Yeah, I am"

"Then that's all that matters to me"

You end up breaking up with Konoha a couple of days before him and Bokuto's graduation, and Akaashi can't say he's glad, because he isn't. He's just relieved. Bokuto is leaving, but you're staying with him, and things might return to normal now. To the way they used to.

"It's just weird, you know?" you tell him, as the two of you walk back home after dropping Bokuto at his place "I don't... feel bad"

"You don't?"

"I mean, yeah. I'll probably miss him. But not too much?" you say, frowning.

Akaashi nods, not too sure on what to answer "I see"

"It's just... you know? I've always thought that the right person would come at the right time. It's silly, right? Might be all those shojo mangas I've read, acting up on me"

"I don't think it's silly" Akaashi says, because somehow, he thinks he feels the same.

His right person came around twelve years ago, and its walking by his side right now.

"Well, maybe Konoha was never the right person. And maybe high school wasn't the right time either" you reason, taping your bottom lip with your finger "What do you think, Keiji?"

He thinks walking home beside you is the best feeling in the world.

He's going to a different college. He's going to a different college and you're not sure why, but the thought leaves you in tears. He tells you one day, during lunch, his eyes never leaving his bento. He wants to major in Literature. You congratulate him, telling him you know he'll do great. When you get home, you throw your bag in a corner and plop on the bed without even taking your uniform off.

The next day is not any easier, and you start to question your attitude. Akaashi and you would remain friends, you're sure of that, even if he goes to a different school than you for the first time ever. So then what's the problem? You don't find it that day, but when you get home, you notice for the first time that you have an entire wall covered in yours and Akaashi's pictures.

"I've never asked you this" you tell him, sitting cross legged on his bed, with a Math book on your lap "But what on earth is in that jar?"

Akaashi follows your gaze, and you notice him hesitate for a moment before answering "The little airplanes and notes you used to throw at me when we were in primary school"

You blink, something heavy taking hold of your throat "You kept those?"

"Yeah"

You go back home and like a robot, walk towards your closet and dig around your stuff without really registering what you're doing. You find your old backpack in the back, a light layer of dust covering it. You empty it on the floor. Inside, its every little note Akaashi sent back, those times he didn't think the teacher would caught him passing notes to your desk behind his back.

You sit in the middle of the mess and cry, because you've realized for the first time that maybe you've been in love with Akaashi forever.

You ask him to meet you at the store he's been accompanying you since the two of you met, to buy the mangas you love. You notice him eyeing the cashier wearily, but he doesn't says anything and you're too nervous to point random facts out. You stop in front of a shelf on the back, the one with the shojo mangas, and turn to him slowly, taking a gulp of air.

"Something wrong?" he asks you, worry evident on his face.

You pick up a random book out of the shelve to your left and open it, not paying real attention to anything inside "Say, Keiji..."

"Yeah?"

"What do you think is the best way of confessing to someone... in a shojo manga?"

He eyes the book in your hand, and then looks back at you "I don't know. I suppose it depends"

"Depends on what?"

"On the characters" he explains, and you nod, chewing on your bottom lip "Sometimes an out of the blue, surprise confession is best for certain characters. After you never even noticed they liked each other"

"Right"

He shrugs "Those are pretty common"

"And other times?"

He hums, glancing at his side and taking a look at some of the titles lined up there "Other times it's something that happens after a long wait, and you know at least one of them has been pining from afar"

You swallow down your nerves "And those are... those are the best right?"

His gaze snaps back to you "What?"

"Yeah... you know..." you say, fumbling with your words "Sometimes a girl has been in love with a guy for a long time, but it's been entirely oblivious too and even dated other boys" you notice him tense, clenching and unclenching his fists, but you're too busy burning a hole in the pages of the book you're holding to life your eyes towards him "And then one day... the girl wakes up and can't stand the idea of the guy just slipping away, and the pain just makes her realize that she's in love. With the guy, of course" you clear your throat "Might have been for a long time"

He takes a couple of seconds to answer, and when he does, his voice is nothing but a whisper "And how would the girl confess her love then?"

"Well..." your hands are trembling as you talk, and you wet your lips before finishing your sentence "She might do it in a comic book store. You know. Self-conscious literature and all that"

Akaashi says your name then, and you weakly nod and don't put up any resistance as he takes the book from your hands, grabbing your shin and making you look him in the eyes.

"Do you want me to show you what usually happens after a shojo manga confession?" he asks, his breath ghosting your lips.

"Yes please"

He kisses you softly at first, a feather light touch that leaves you wanting more, because you've never felt this much from just a single kiss. You almost whine in relieve when he halfheartedly places the book back on the shelf to take your head in both of his hands and part your lips with his, deepening the kiss and pushing you against the wall. His tongue tastes of desperation, and bottled up feelings, and his body fits against yours like a puzzle you've spent too long trying to solve.

"I'm sorry if this... if I'm ruining anything" you tell him between kisses, and he throws his head back and laughs— the most beautiful sound you've ever heard.

"Ruin? I've been waiting my whole life for you. And I was willing to keep waiting forever"

You chuckle, eyes filling with tears— this time of joy "Good thing our shojo manga doesn't have the budget for that many chapters, huh?"

You go to different colleges, but your newfound love remains strong. Akaashi would end up working for a manga magazine later on, and you think it couldn't have been any more fitting for your own shojo story, as you sweep the dust off the desk where now two jars full of little paper planes rest together.

[goshikitsutomusmommy]

I’m not sure if you’re ok with trend requests but can you please write for “I have a boyfriend, he goes to a different school” trend with haikyuu boys? Like obviously faking having a s/o with any characters of your choice, if not, then please ignore this💕💕 your page is so cute btw🥰🥰

“I Have a Boyfriend, He Goes to a Different School” Trend with Haikyu!! Teams

Synopsis : You Lie About Having a Partner and This is How the Haikyu!! Boys React

Genre : Comedy , fluff

Pairing(s) : Inarizaki x Manager! reader , Seijoh x Manager! reader , Shiratorizawa x Manager! reader

Word Count : 0.76k words

Warning(s) : She/her pronouns used

Masterlist Link : Here

“Yeah, actually, just letting you know... I have a boyfriend who attends a different school, in a different prefecture as well.", you announce as the entire Inarizaki members have bewilderment written all over their expressions.

The Miya twins happened to be the first to break out in laughter. You cannot help but feel somewhat offended, querying what could be so hilarious about you having a significant other.

Soon Suna follows over in their laughter with muffled snickers of his own, which encourages Ginjima to join in as well.

Ojiro being the gentlemen he is, attempts to showcase an earnest expression out of respect. However, the quiver of his bottom lip threatening to betray him tells you a whole different story.

"Oh, that's pretty interestin'! How long have ya been dating? Can we meet 'im?!" Akagi guilibly believes your trickery.

"Am pretty sure that [Name]-Chan here is just jokin' 'round, ya know 'er, so silly!" Atsumu quickly steps up and puts an end to the false narrative Akagi accepted.

"Why wouldn't she have a boyfriend? [Name]-Chan is the prettiest person ever! Anyone would be lucky to be a potential partner of 'ers.", you could feel hot tears on the brim of your eyes approaching to disappoint your frantic efforts.

"Akagi-Senpai, yer the best! We don't deserve ya," you exclaim as the tears glide down your face. "Excuse me while a go cry in the storage room now. Miyas, am beating ya identical dunces in a moment.”

   "Everyone, I have an announcement to make; I have a boyfriend that goes to a different school, he lives in another prefecture too. You probably never heard of him.", you declare to the Seijoh boys as you meet their doubtful gazes.

"Liar." Kyotani 'Mad-Dog' Kentaro quickly accuses you before you could dupe any person in the room. "Why wouldn't I have a significant other, huh?" you challenge immediately after.

   "[Name]-Chan lying about having a boyfriend is none of our—" Oikawa was instantly interrupted by a harsh thud of a volleyball smacking him in the back of his head. "Whether or not she has a partner is none of your business, Shittykawa." Iwaizumi criticizes the Aoba Johsai captain for conversing so condescendingly with their manager. 

   Matsukawa and Hanamaki were lovingly cheering in your favor for finally accomplishing your long-awaited mission of getting a significant other. They were a charming pair that you were more than honored to be a friend of, unlike the so-called charismatic captain of Seijoh.

Yahaba appears to be disheartened by the news he had just overheard. Meanwhile, Watari tried his best to reassure his friend that he's still got a chance in the long run. 

   Stirring in your lap, Kunimi wakes up due to the commotion his team members have caused. "What happened?" he groggily asks, evidently fatigued. "Nothing, just letting the team know about my boyfriend." he hums in response, nuzzling his head back in your lap, planning to rest once again.

It was moments like these that you couldn't help but compare him to an adorable petite kitten.

"Hey, what did I miss?" Kindaichi asks, perplexed. "I have been betrayed by my lover!" exclaims Yahaba as Watari holds him back from tackling you in an embrace.

   "Prepare yourselves for have I, [Surname] [Name], have pitying news to present; I have a boyfriend, he attends a different academy in a whole separate prefecture. Now, don't be too upset. It is only reasonable for someone like me to have a partner." you declare, obtaining your presence heavy and sharp throughout the Shiratorizawa enormous gym. 

   Reon nods hesitant, baffled as to why you're asserting your relationship status so dramatically. "Yeah, right." Shirabu lets out an inaudible scoff.

   Goshiki stares at you with stars in his eyes, "You're so cool, Senpai! I always knew you would be the first to get a partner. You're pretty, and your confidence radiates so flawlessly." he praises with the slightest blush adorning his chubby cheeks.

   You silently coo at how charming he unintentionally is, pinching his cheeks— more like dragging him around by his cheeks, leading them to redden even more than they previously were. Semi promptly comes to his Kouhai's rescue and attempts to peel your hands off of his cheeks.

   Tendou laughs at the scene in front of him as Goshiki rubs his now numb face, and you being at the receiving end of another lecture via Semi about not harming your Kouhais— no matter how cute they are at that moment.

Ushijima joins in his best friend's laughter with soft chuckles of his own. He wouldn't replace this for the world, and he loves the team dearly.

Author’s Note : KAHZWJS THANK YOUU AND YES YES I’M MORE THAN OKAY WITH TREND REQUESTS😚😚 I hope you don’t mind me doing this to my top three favorite Haikyuu teams! This was a very fun idea, thank you for wanting me to write this🫂

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

Shit that happened in Soy Luna

Please read my list for Violetta too

Yep. Let's go. Spoilers ahead if you some reason wanna watch it yourself (but I got spoiled about everything before I even started watching so. Eh.)

There's a running theme of people getting kissed without their consent. Like it happens. To a lot of people.

Mostly to Luna, the main character, who got kissed against her consent by TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE.

Ok so: Sharon is a woman. An evil woman. Luna's parents work for her and therefore they live in her mansion. She is Luna's aunt, but Luna doesn't know it because she's adopted and don't know her biological family. Sharon doesn't know it either until season 2.

And when she does know... she wanna make sure Luna never finds out. She goes to her adoptive daughter Ámbar, who she has told everyone is just her goddaughter (why?? Idk I guess she doesn't want to be recognized as a mother?) and tells Ámbar that she's her long lost niece, Sol Benson.

So Ámbar gets a fucking identity crisis. TWICE. Once when she finds out she's Sol Benson and once when she finds out she's actually NOT Sol Benson, but Luna is.

And then she gets a third identity crisis and turns goth, but more on that later

To make an ASOUE reference... Sharon and Ámbar are firestarters. Like if anyone would ever make an asoue au it would fucking WORK because they're literally firestarters, and Sharon is obsessed with a fortune that doesn't belong to her and also her brother-in-law who she was in love with (she even took his last name in his honor after he died)

Sharon burns down a mansion twice and Ámbar burns down a roller skates rink

Oh yeah. While this dramatic family drama is happening we have the plot of a group of quirky friends riding roller skates <3 So yes it's like two shows in one you're watching

Ámbar once was so horny that she daydreamed about her crush in a punk outfit on a motorcycle, and they sang a duet while she repeatedly sang "TAKE ME!!!!"

And btw, when I first translated that word (she sings "Llevame" and I translated it), google translate said it was "ride me" and that's even funnier

Luna's best friend Nina had a secret online persona that everyone had a crush on, and it went so far that other people pretended to be her persona

A girl named Jazmin gets famous online by gossiping about her friends and apparently everyone is okay with this

Ok no they aren't always ok with it, but they forgive it very easily

Luna and Nina had sleepovers like every other episode for a while

This girl named Yam sang a literal love song to her best friend Jim, and they drove away the focus from them because Luna's love interest Matteo had to go talk to Luna in a park or something

Jim and Yam once broke a pipe and had to wear oversized suits because their clothes were wet

They also once dyed their hair silver by accident and went around school in hats and thought no one would notice

Ámbar once just watched Luna sleep while they shared a hotel room

At the same hotel, Luna's two love interests Matteo and Simón shared a room, and Matteo started talking in his sleep while Simón had a livestream with his band in the middle of the night

Simón once left tray of rose pedals from Ámbar's room to the main hallway, then they kissed and had implied sex or something

Simón had a crush on Luna in season 1, in season 2 they were the best of friends, and then in season 3 Luna had a crush on him. This did not lead anywhere.

Matteo once climbed a fence just because he wanted to show Luna a video, and then he fell off the fence and fucking died

Ok no he didn't die but he had this weirdass fantasy that he and Luna started making out, when in reality Luna was calling an ambulance

The house maid Amanda was normal in season 1, then in season 2 she got an imaginary boyfriend that she believes is real

Ámbar and Luna went on a skating date once and they had it off screen

Nina and her mom moved in with her mom's "best friend" and the two women were only best friends who wanted to live together, nothing more, WE SWEAR

The best friend then disappears

A man named Roberto just dies after the second episode

Nina breaks up with her boyfriend because they were too much of a healthy couple and we can't have that

Ámbar, after turning goth, graffiti paints her whole room black

Luna always dreams about the future and everyone is like "nah that's a dream <3" every single time

Simón moved from Mexico just to be with Luna and for the first weeks he lived in the mansion garage until some dudes looking for a band member offered him to stay at their apartment

This boy named Ramiro just raps and breakdances through every situation and no one questions it

He also third wheels some lesbians (Jim and Yam)

Luna dated Simón for like 10 episodes and never told her parents (even if they prob knew)

There's these twins who pretend to be each other simply to cause chaos and nothing else

The mansion burned down and then they just start next episode with "1 month later" and everything is like. Forgotten I guess

Sharon went blind

A boy named Michel just appeared to be an exchange student, and then he left because he was going to be an exchange student somewhere else

This asshole named Benicio dressed as Simón to kiss Ámbar

Their old roller skates coach Tamara, before leaving, lets Luna, a 16 year old, be in charge of the rink

No one can tell each other anything in the mansion, because if they do, Sharon's assistant Rey just appears like "WHAT WERE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!"

The season 3 intro is a dubstep version for some reason

The characters more or less stop going to school the further we go. Like, school was an important plot in s1, and in the other two seasons they are like. Wearing school uniforms but never attending classes

Sharon put her own father in a mental institution because he knew the truth about everything

That's all I came up with now... there's a lot more but that's that for now.

[twstheadcanons]

This is a lore question and a slightly specific one. Cater as a character and otherwise is super interesting to me but at the same time insanely confusing. While at first I thought he would end up having maybe slightly abusive family there's a possibility that's not the case. His sister's seem to enjoy dolling him up and his mother seems to go along with it and his father's a bit more absent. I think I would mainly like to know what his true self is truly reflecting and also if Trey seems to know about this 'true version'. Don't feel pressured to anwser this if you can't btw ❣️

Cater fans come get yall’s food.

S, iideally I’d go through events Cater’s prominent in (Beans Day, Halloween), but that would just make this whole post longer.  So I’ll be using Cater’s card stories for now.  What we know about Cater, on the surface level, is that he comes across as happy-go-lucky, energetic, social, trendy, superficial, flaky, and insensitive at times.  But that’s Cater on a surface level.

So for Cater, his major issues from his background are:

his family frequently moving to accommodate his father’s occupation as a banker

his sisters dragging him into their own interests that he was expected to accommodate as well

Cater repeatedly states he disliked getting dragged around by his sisters and having cutesy stuff he wasn’t genuinely interested in shoved into his face.  This would even happen on his birthday, where his sisters got him things they’re more likely to enjoy, which made Cater feel frustrated since he was supposed to be the focus on his own birthday.  But despite that annoyance, Cater understands his sisters didn’t really mean any harm.  From the sounds of it, they liked hanging out with Cater, and assumed that Cater enjoyed how they spent time together as well since Cater preferred to go with the flow, rather than rock the boat.  

In his Bday SSR, Cater mentions that his sisters became more considerate of his own interests and asked him what he wanted.  All three coming from a family where they move and lose close friends a lot, the sisters are probably close and want to stay close to their brother as well, since they’re the only consistent company in a similar age range.  His sisters are each other’s best friends, Cater didn’t have that growing up.  He also mentions his sisters and mother’s sweets-making kick, and how he eventually got over having sweets every day.  But when he protested, it’d disappoint and sadden them/they’d have dejected looks on their faces, which Cater didn’t know how to handle, so he made himself go along with their whims to keep them happy.  

This pours into his social media life, where he’s a peppy, cheery guy that posts upbeat content and responds with light, casual, carefree messages to people.  His Lab SR literally has him state that he ‘should always be happy and excited, after all’.  So, clearly, whatever dynamic the Diamond family has, while not what I’d call something as heavy as abuse, isn’t considerate of Cater’s feelings and views Cater’s ‘go with the flow’ ways as approval.  If he ‘breaks character’ of the devil-may-care person he is on the surface, it raises questions, and Cater would rather just avoid all that and enjoy himself instead of getting involved in anything heavy.

Again, Cater doesn’t like to rock the boat.  He also mentions in his Lab SR that this obsession with cutesy stuff became rather invasive, and he’d even be criticised or second-guessed if he didn’t go along with the idea.  Cater ends up accommodating that interest to prevent any debate, even if he didn’t actually care for them.  That said, with such an emphasis on aesthetics being the way he grew up, Cater has a good understanding and practical knowledge of decour and eye-catching designs, which makes him helpful and invaluable when the time calls for decour.  This is something Cater knows he’s good at, and enjoys showing off since the focus is on himself and he’s acknowledged for his skills.

With their family moving all the time, Caters gained and lost friends a lot.  Cater has an outgoing personality, at this point, it’s safe to assume he’s an extrovert, so making friends comes naturally to him.  But when you’re moving a lot, maybe sometimes in the middle of a school term, .  Cater needs engagement and social interaction, but at this point in his life, he’s tired of trying to keep up with old and new friends on deep levels, hence his interest and obsession with social media.

One thing to note about Cater: he likes cutting corners.  a lot.

In his R card “Portrait of Rosalia”, it’s understood that Cater being nice to Rosalia by throwing her a party with some lively students around is a way for him to get on her good side, because Rosalia overhears the teachers’ discussions of tests and future lessons so that he wouldn’t have to study for an upcoming history test: while Cater’s idea of a party to lift Rosalia’s spirits is in good nature, he wants something out of it that benefits him.  But while disappointed the plan didn’t work, he’s quick to brush it off, and Rosalia’s anger, by mentioning that she’s cuter when uptight anyway.

In his PE card “This betrayer!” Cater only have five laps left to do in PE.  But he hates how sweaty he is and how tedious the overall task is.  So he uses his UM to try and avoid doing all five laps himself.  Riddle catches him red-handed, and Cater tries - albeit I’m sure he knows it’s a lost cause - to flatter Riddle at the last minute.  Trey’s also involved, and despite leaving Cater in the dust, Trey also returns with Riddle, because Trey knows that Cater’s the type that tries to cut corners whenever possible, something against the rules in Heartslabyul.  Honestly, as far as Trey goes, Trey’s someone used to the way Riddle holds himself back.  Cater’s exterior personality wouldn’t be hard for Trey to recognise as Cater pushing himself or exaggerating points of his personality just to keep up an image. especially after being in the same dorm for three years.

In short, while he isn’t malicious about majority of the time, Cater will use others to get out situations and tasks he wants no part of.  This is a huge thing reflected in his UM, as it allows Cater to be in more than one place, so that he personally doesn’t have to be involved.  Growing up with two pushy older sisters, it makes he develops a UM that complements a need for escape when pure wit won’t work.  And despite being someone with a superficial interest in trends, that experience accumulates in him understanding the basics about social media and how it affects others, himself included, since it became the only way he could stay in contact with acquaintances and ‘friends’ from previous years. 

 Cater has a good understanding of how people, in general, work, especially those in his agegroup, which makes him rather crafty when he wants to string others along and get out of a situation.  This doesn’t make Cater a mean or conniving person, and in fact, he’s generally amicable and social.  Cater lives by a pretty ‘live in the moment’ credo.  He enjoys having fun and not getting overly serious about issues when he can help it.  There are instances where he doesn’t care about the situation he’s in, or thinks it’s lame/boring, but he tries to make the most of it as something to post about on MagiCam later to engage in low-effort social interaction for a mental break. 

Cater pretty much states this in his Halloween SSR:

“If I left there, they remained there. That’s why I’d rather have a casual and happy time with everyone instead of going steady. It’s like a circus troupe, you know, having fun hanging with people all over the world and then leaving. And that’s why MagiCam is the best. I suddenly got messages from acquaintances from the school I went to 3 years ago. Aren’t my casual and light relationships multiplying? It’s lovely! “

Social media helps him keep in contact with people on a low-effort level, so the risk of moving doesn’t damage his relationships online like it would physical friendships.  As for family, Cater’s feelings towards his family are difficult, tricky ones he has problems with.  He certainly doesn’t hate them, but their lifestyle, the moving and pushy personalities, don’t mesh well with Cater’s personality overall.  When Lilia tries to relate to Cater’s experiences of fleeting relationships, Cater can’t help but dismiss Lilia’s empathy as surface-level, since, to CATER’S knowledge (it’s not like he knows Lilia’s old as shit), Lilia’s always lived in the VoT with his own family and friends, which hits a sore spot with Cater:

““Cater: ….Family…huh.

Flashback Lilia: I feel like I understand you. But it is just as Cater says, it might be the truth that you should not attach yourself too much to one person in particular.

Flashback ends Cater: (That was full of lies. For a guy who grew up in the same place and never had to deal with rebuilding relations over and over… He wouldn’t understand my worthless and meaningless feelings.)

/Notification

Cater: Hello, Trey. What’s up? Huh? Are we doing our rehearsal for our night show at the stamp rally now? And is Deuce from my committee lacking in hands, so Ace is helping him out? Darn, Ace is definitely going to use this to ask me for a favor later!

Cater: Argh! And is Riddle on the verge of a rampage? I’ll be back soon, Trey, please calm him! It was such a pain getting involved in the biggest crisis of this Halloween week! No, for real! I’m not lying. That’s why you don’t have to say such cold things to me, kay? URGH, TREY, YOU’RE SO CRUEL!!

Cater: Now that Diasomnia’s turmoil has settled, it’s time to change the mood. No matter how you slice it, we’ll still separate if we become 4th years… It would be different if I repeated a year though. Anyway, I should just enjoy the memories I’m making “now”! I’ll surprise everyone with this charming skeleton costume! I’ll show them my serious side!”

Cater calls his own feelings ‘worthless and meaningless’, which likely ties into how he got dragged into his mother and sisters’ own interests over his own, and sometimes even criticised if he didn’t go with their flow.  He also expects the friendships he’s made in NRC (as we see with him talking to Trey about the rest of the Heartslabyul cast), to inevitably disappear after he and Trey are fourth years with their own internships and lives to live.  Because to Cater, the future of his life and relationships appear disruptive and inconsistent, so instead of fretting about them, he wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he’s doing at all times, hence why he cuts corners to make things easier on himself.  This is why he can come across as superficial and easy to get along with, because he doesn’t want to fret over the details.

unrelated but we’re team ‘former dorm leader cater’ here because him doing it because it sounds cool and fun fits perfectly with his personality

[vitessastvdy]

I finished Initial d! (my edit above, like if you save:))

I'm so happy. It took me less then a month. It was so interesting I couldn't put it down. The world of street racers in the 90s. I'm in love with the late 90s and early 2000s. Life was a lot more simplier back then.

Immidiately after I watched the last ep of final stage I had teares in my eyes. So much happend in the past six stages I just got so emotional. First time for an anime tbh.

The philosophy behind it was amazing and simple at the same time.

spoliers ahead

-----------------------------------------

The scene that was appearing threw the fifth stage was when the older chubby guy who was driving an GT-R (if I remember correctly) asked Keisuke, Ryosuke and Takumi why they race. Tbh I can't remember what Takumi said (Ik he's a main character and all that jazz, oh well). Keisuke answered bc it is a proof he's a masohist (I cracked up at that). And Ryosuke said a dream. I was confused at what he meant by that, but after the whole suicide thing I figured out the meaning by the Project D name before he said it himself hehe

I remember I tried to guess what does D stand for. For example: drift, destination... And when I got it I was like "Gotcha bish!"

-----------------------------------------

I don't know why was every one bashing the animation. I didn't even notice that much of a difference between third- fourth and fifth-finale stage. Three companies were working on initial from start till the end. Give em a break.

I also want to point out the number of outfits in the anime and the manga. It was so cool that you can see characters style evolve as they mature. Keisuke started from wearing hoodies to polo shirts so that in the fifth and finale stages he started wearing dress shirts.

The healthy rivalry between Takumi and Keisuke is the most beautiful thing people in the same team can have. They thought more of the other one then themselves. They looked up at each other. Just beautiful.

I found it really interesting bc they touched up on some problems of young adultes. Clearly the police wasn't one lmao. Iketani and Wataru were the only ones who vomplained that they don't have money. Bruh even Takumi was lucky, Bunta pulled out new engine from the hat literaly.

The moment that stayed on my mind threw the series was when Takumi in Itsuki missed summer brake and when they had to find stable jobs. I'm third year in high school and after all this corona shit I will try again to find a part-time job, so I was like I will experience that too, damn.

Btw do you think that Itsuki's life is kind of pathethic, ik it's a strong word. But like imagine having a best friend that is wunderkind for driving and their you like wuhu you can do it. Also he always blindly says that Takumi is going to win. Most of the people in the crowd analyse and study his driving and then say whose gonna win. But Itsuki all away in Gunma knows he is going to win like dude, you're just a puppy. In highschool he worked at the gas station part-time and now he just continues doing the same thing. Is his only dream to work at the gas station? Maybe he will inheriet the station idk.

*I'm not try to offend anyone who workes at a gas station or has a similar kind of job. It's hard and honest work. In an anime it's not as fascinating as pro racer ya know.

The cutest moto of the series. I cracked up every time the thrio fantastico didn't have luck in love XD

The scenes in extra stage were too much. You know what I mean ;)

Almost forgot about the music!

EUROBEAT 4LIFE!

Favourite songs: Make up your mind, gas gas gas and madoka

________________

Favourite characters

Keisuke

If you haven't already figured it out hahaha. I don't have things like a husbando or that sort of thing. He just motivates me to do more, to do better. His impulsivness reminds of my own. You can clearly see his grown a lot. He understands that his brother was there for him. And the fact that student became better than the master is just amazing to me.

Sayuki

-I'm just sad that she didn't drove

- I love that she's independant and can hold her own. Remind me of myself a little.

-great friend

-also the friendship with Shingo is a mood

Comment whose your favourite character and song, and why.

I know this is not indepth analasys. I just wanted to share my thoughts with the rest of the fandom. And for those who are thinking about picking it up, I higly recommend it if you're into jdm, tofu and young adulte stuff.

I showed my friend Keisuke. And she got interested so I showed her the Kyoko tragedy. After few days she sent me edits of initial d races and thought they were so cool. I had to simplfy car terminology for her but overall she really likes it. She doesn't know anything about cars so will see how it goes.

[queer-as-frikc]

My coming out story is weird, it gets a lil transphobic so tw near the end tw long post too

So, pretty much throughout my time growing up through elementary school and half of middle school, i grew up in a white middle class area. I didnt know about the LGBTQ+ or anything other than what I saw, which was white people and an occasional poc. Eventually I had to move and I ended up in a super diverse area, and ended up becoming best friends with this person (they are ftm now so imma use the right pronouns but they were f when this story mostly takes place) he told me all about things I didnt know, specifically the LGBTQ+ community and that he was pan, and it was new information so just like any 13 year old learning new things, I questioned myself, I questioned if I could like the same sex or not or possibly more.

Sadly, drama happened between my best friend, his girlfriend and I, so thing got a little weird. But there was a time in winter, when he was off that relationship for more than a month and he said he'd like to date me, and I really thought about it before hand and said yeah, I couldnt tell you how happy I was to have this experience.

I told my mom that night, in a round about way cuz I was nervous, "Hey mom, what if I liked girls?" She told me she doesnt think that I do, because I always expressed feelings for guys, and when I tell her I didnt really understand what being gay was when I was younger, I didn't really know it was a possibility. She snapped at me and said, "Unless you are willing to kiss a girl and do the other stuff, you arent gay at all."

Eventually I have a sit down conversation with her, about how confusing this all was and how I wish I knew how I felt, and so on. She said she had a similar questioning phase but it never stuck so she doesnt think I am.

Like a month later I figure it out and dude that was so gratifying. I came out as bi to my mom, who just dismissed the whole thing, but I was terrified to tell my uncle (it's a long story about that, no it's not "sweet home Alabama") because he always said bi's were wh*res so yeah. I ended up telling him, and he goes, "You know my opinion on it but that doesnt mean that I'll disown you or anything." Btw the relationship (dating wise) with my best friend after he came out as ftm because he went back to his ex, it's all cool tho.

So that was that, or so I thought. It was my first year of high school, and I finally really understood the definition of pan, what was holding me back though was the trans experience, I thought because I didnt know what it was like, I couldnt be pan, even though I didnt have a preference, turns out it just means you like people no matter their gender and it like, clicked finally so yeah. I've told my family about that since but I a similar reaction: my mom said she doesnt think I am and she lectured me on my generation having so many labels and how she hated it. My uncle said he appreciated that I was pan more than me being bi which confused me but he just had a better view of pansexual than bisexual. (I explained to both of them what the difference was but idk man)

I believe it was my second year of high school when I really started to question my gender, and that was mostly because I saw a video of what gender dysphoria looks like if it's not that strong and you arent aware for ftm. So like wearing bagging clothes all the time, always wearing sports bras, and practically no other bra, feeling really good if someone accidentally calls you sir, etc. And I was like, oml it's me. But it wasnt, I didnt find that out until later tho. So, with my friend group, I find a name that seems to fit me well and ask them to address me by it and he/him pronouns, as like a test of sorts. (All of my friends are gay in some way so it was cool) In the end tho, I got a little iffy about the whole thing and wouldnt ever correct them at times or it was just off for me. I felt really bad because I thought that they might have thought that I was just trying to force myself to be more like them, but I wasnt, i still felt bad though and kinda dropped it.

I'm not sure 100% how I figured it out tho, but I remember talking to my best friend (not the same one from middle school, they were my best friend as well but they arent the same person) about the whole experience and I believe they brought up the idea of genderfulid, and I was like :0.... what that. They explain it, you go aall over the gender spectrum, some days you might feel like a boy, others you might feel like you have no gender, some days you might feel like your gender is something completely weird and different, that's just what it is. And I was like, "It fits but like, I barely feel femme at any point in time, maybe like once a year." And they tell me, that's ok and stuff as long as my gender just decides to be a completely weird and went all over the place, it counted, so I was like, "I finally figured it out!!!" And i was so happy.

Then came the time I was comfortable enough to tell my parents. I had been using the label genderfuild for over half a year already and I thought that it was what I was so it was ok to tell them. I saw how ok me being gay went, so I was nervous but not as nervous as I should have been, probably. I told my mom first, she went on a similar rant of her no liking my generations labels and such, but it went fine, I explained it, I thought I was through, I thought I was fine, apparently not. One day I'm in the shower and I hear my mom being very expressive with what ever shes talking about to my uncle, which is fine, she needs someone to vent to sometimes. When I get out though, and I can here her clearly, I hear sees complaining about what I told her recently, that I'm genderfulid, but instead of saying that, she only says I want to be a boy. (Oh no) So shes complaining to him, asking why I cant be more like her and just be a masculine girl and be fine, why do I have to fit in with the crowd of my generation to feel special, why cant I just be fine with who I am now? Etc.

The sad thing is, that night, I was going out shopping for pants and underwear with my uncle because I needed some and I wore men's pants already at that point, because they are more durable, and stuff so I knew it was gonna be a long ride. My mom was snippy with me that whole night, just the entire time which sucked.

When we finally left to go get clothes though, I didnt know it could get worse. My uncle lectured me about how that's just my generations fad, and how his was making tattoos and piercings ok in the work place and mine is being trans a gay and all that crap, and that I'm just trying to fit in, I'm not being myself, no matter how much I chop myself up and cut my hair and take hormones my chromosomes will never change and so I can never be an actual guy. He also said that I would bring just more attention to myself being a woman who does guy things rather than try and be one, and he thinks I'm doing this all for attention. I was mad but silent at this point, I didnt want to cause anything to happen. He ended up asking me, "So did you pick a different name?" I was surprised but I said yeah, and my friends were using it and it seemed to fit better. He asked me what it was and fear over took my body. I told him, "I'll only tell you if you dont use it against me if your mad." He says, "i cant promise that." And then gets mad because I wont tell him. Though I do, because I feel obligated since hes buying me clothes. To be even more confusing, he buys me guys underwear, and undershirts along with the predetermined pants he promised me and now I'm so confused.

But it gets even worse. When we get home, my mom freaks out on him because be bought me all that mens stuff and she said he was encouraging my behavior and stuff, he defended with it's just clothes, and yah it is. Eventually things settle down, obviously my mom isnt talking to be, but that's for the best at this point. I'm in the living room with my uncle and he just then starts harassing me with questions like, how do you know? he asks. "Well, I just feel that way, same as you." I say. But why do you wanna be a guy? he asks. "I dont wanna be a guy, it's just weird that way. Also it's not me being a guy, it me being many more than that," I say. He says that's bullsh*t. I offer to show him videos that better explain what trans is and how it's an actual sciencey thing and stuff but he said he wont take a video because he wants me to say it. And then he just goes off, saying the name I picked out shows how self centered I am because I am selfish, he kept asking me if i liked to fight, to catch and play with bugs, to be strong, to be angry all the time, and all these stereotypes for men and I just left, and went to bed. He wasnt going to listen to me, so there wasnt a point to me staying.

But, it gets worse. The morning comes and I'm awoken by the slam of my door by my uncle and the laughter of my mom. My uncle starts being really aggressive and starts cleaning my room, I only have clothes on the floor mostly so that's all it was, but he starts saying, well if you're gonna be a man, imma start training you like one, the man of the house picks up after everyone, the man of the house does everything he can to help the house run smoothly, the man of the house has to be strong, and all that stuff. (Which I thought was funny because he was "the man of the house" yet I did everything, and still do. I clean up most after him, funny huh.) And, I know what's happening and so I stay in bed, I don't want this to happen. But I literally get ripped out of my bed by my uncle and get told to stop being a little b*tch and a brat because I'm being selfish by my mom and I'm yelled at to sit in the living room and wait while my uncle cleans my room. When hes done hes starts lecturing me and being all aggressive and in my face. He keeps asking me a million questions with the tone that he didnt care so I knew he wouldn't listen. Eventually, him and my mom leave, I'm told to stay there until I get back. When they do get back, they act like everything is fine, nothing happened between them and I and it's just been so hard for me to talk to them about that since.

I'm greatful that I dont have to deal with that anymore but every time something that that is brought up with my family, I panic so much now. I'm fine and I'm safe but it was very traumatic for me. And uh, thanks for listening.

hey, thank you so much for sharing your story. this was just. so heartbreaking. noone deserves to have a person like your uncle in their life. im so sorry you had to go through all of that. i hope you’re in a much better place now <3 (also i loveeddd reading about how you figured it out) =)

again, tysm <3