#she really needs to create a child that becomes an accountant

[fazcinatingblog]

Don't you hate it when your boss is like "do not send this out until I approve the invoice" and then 5-7 business days later, she says to increase the invoice by $5 and

[bibibbon]

smth i hate abt hori is how easy it would’ve been to use the lov to show how hero society lets people slip through the cracks as a result creates villains, but he never fully expands on the idea.

jin’s parents died when he was in *middle school* MIDDLE SCHOOL! which means he could’ve been anywhere between 12-14. and then because of a motorcycle accident that *wasn’t his fault* he got a criminal record, was fired from his job, and became homeless. and then he just spiraled from there.

toga is biologically wired be to fascinated and obsessed with blood. but instead of helping her, her parents are disgusted by her and force her to suppress herself until she inevitably snaps.

dabi is a product of his fathers abuse and it was allowed to go on for decades because his father is a famous pro hero

compress is just an unapologetic evil bastard tho and i love him for that

This is also one of my problems with horis writing!!! Villains in MHA all had wasted potential and I absolutely hated the way their arcs went!

I guess the only arc that I can semi agree on is toga himiko's arc to a certain extent but that even has wasted potential that I talk about down below 👇. I discuss what togas arc could of been and different directions her character could of went.

In my opinion himiko was already introduced as somewhat irredeemable. The first time we see her we are told that she killed 6 people known so far and on around 5 of them she performed blood letting. Also her first victim she literally sliced him up and started drinking his blood (some including I theorise that she maybe even ate some of his body parts). I think it adds to the story simply because togas love or idea of love is based on her becoming that person and having parts of them on her whether that be literal or metaphorical.

I personally like the idea that toga is an irredeemable victim. Toga is someone who was failed by the system and had went through a lot for sure but the actions she did were also things that she should be accounted for ( I talk more about toga and what makes her different from lady nagant in another post). In the end I personally enjoy seeing toga be a humanised not redeemed victim of society that has also commited many crimes.

When it comes to other members of the league I feel like they could of all had better arcs in general.

I remember talking to @doodlegirl1998 and she suggested that twice and togas characters could of very much switched roles as twice is a character who parallels more with ochako (both struggling financially) and hawks would get more repercussions for killing a child (toga). However, I also do like twices death but I do have some problems like how I wish his death would of been thoroughly explored and we see how it impacted everyone or we should of gotten more from twice himself in general.

Dabi deserved better and I really would of wanted him to have a redemption arc, receive some concequences but end up with the todoroki family WITH ENJI DEAD (I HATE HIM!). I hated the whole Dabi always had an ice quirk and that he was just the second choice, always the second choice all along.

Shigaraki and just how much AFO was involved ruined everything for me also Shigaraki knowing about AFO was a horrible twist which made shigarakis characterisation even more inconsistent. I would of liked to see a Shigaraki redemption where he himself works towards one by starting to question AFO and get into the leader role a whole lot more while using the MVA to his advantage to get information, resources and more.

Spinner could of ended up being the better stain and learned form stains mistakes while also changing with shigaraki. I also feel like he needed more build up with his own counterpart like shoji and a thorough explanation and development of the whole hetamorphis discrimination thing.

Compress was evil for fun and it's fun to have those types of characters. One thing that I really would of liked to explore is compress's and magne's interactions. I feel like their arcs could of been interwoven (maybe I ship them a little who knows 🤷‍♀️) magne's death should of had more substance to it and all it just felt lacking and compress's disappearance the same.

Now when it comes to minor villains Iam a huge advocate for MUSTARD!! AND GIVING US A MUSTARD REDEMPTION 👇👇👇

I also think that muscular and moonfish should of obviously went to prison but that this could of been used as a way to shake the leagues trust for shigaraki. If any of the league members were to end up in jail would shigaraki help them? Maybe he won't as he didn't do that to muscular or moonfish or maybe he has stated to care for them more and he would as he is growing into that leadership role.

I would have it so that the Dr garaki is just an evil menace who starts to become much more greedy and manic causing AFO's death and going insane.

Kurogiri or kurooboro in this case would go through a different type arc that's down below.

In the end all of the villain characters or characters that don't up hold the status quo are victims of society. I think your ask could also apply to the hero characters that are also harmed by the system like hawks and izuku.

[meta-squash]

Some random maybe rambling thoughts about Jack and his feelings towards his team:

I think Jack's love for, relationship with, and treatment of each individual member of his team is really interesting.

Owen and Tosh are the two team members he truly hand-picked. He followed Owen and recruited him. He literally tracked Tosh down and made a deal to get her out of a UNIT prison. He did his research finding them, making sure they were right, convincing them to join him. He did, essentially, save them and allow them a space to remake themselves.

And for the most part he treats the two of them in a sort of paternal way. Owen, especially, but both of them. He's firm when he needs to be, and gentle when he needs to be, but there's this sort of distant yet intense protectiveness of them. Like the way a parent still sees their child as a vulnerable thing that needs caring for, even after their child is a fully grown adult. His love for them is extremely protective, but he's not close with them, he doesn't confess his thoughts or feelings to them except in dire circumstances like in Dead Man Walking when he's with Owen in the jail.

So his loss of them is a loss of a father because, in a sense, he created who they were in Torchwood. He found them, worked to recruit them. He gave them a space to grow and learn and change and hone their talents, and he supported and taught and molded them. They were part of his earliest hand-picked team, too, so they were there for long enough that they saw the growing pains, and they were his, in a way that I think he was sort of convinced they'd be with him for a long time, which is why he was so desperate to bring Owen back the first time. He loved them so much he kind of forgot Torchwood has a high mortality rate, sort of in the way a parent assumes they won't bury their child.

On the other hand, both Ianto and Gwen kind of recruited themselves. Ianto harassed Jack into a job, and Gwen unintentionally brute-forced herself out of Retcon in such a spectacularly dramatic way that it got her a job. They found him, not the other way around.

Jack's relationship with them is different. He's closer to them, less paternal, more confessional, more romantic. It's interesting that he sees them both as potential (and in Ianto's case, eventual) love interests. It seems like he doesn't feel quite as responsible for them, or at least he feels responsible in a different way. He's able to open up to them about himself in a way that he doesn't do with Tosh and Owen. And he's not as put off when they question him. It's almost as if because they independently forced themselves into the job, they're more like equals, or rivals, or something. There's a different sort of potential relationship there from Owen and Tosh.

But it also means that he doesn't or can't love them in the same way. I think somehow he subconsciously thinks he can stop himself from falling in love romantically, but he doesn't seem to think about that parental type of love. So he tries to keep his distance from Gwen and Ianto a bit, knowing he'll hurt them and they'll hurt him. But he doesn't take Owen and Tosh into account. But it does mean that Ianto's loss is different one. It's a grief of a romantic type, the loss of a lover, but it's also this awful "what if" that hangs there, what if Jack had been willing to be closer, had been willing to have a proper relationship with Ianto while it lasted instead of this sort of weird undefined thing, what if Ianto had lived, etc. And Gwen, too, becomes a "what if," in a living sense, once she's married to Rhys. That frisson is always there between them, but once she and Rhys are married it becomes a sort of hypothetical between them, what if she'd chosen Jack, what if they took it past the abstraction of yearning into something real, what if what if, etc. Only it's not mourning, it's something else entirely because she's still there with him.

I just find it so interesting that the two hand-picked members Jack seems to see as his children and the two who forced their way into to Torchwood he seems to see as potential romantic interests.

[antispopausandstuff]

SPOP and the problem with "you vs. me"

.

you know the drill, this will be very long and may be scattered.

in attempts to show a more completed picture, i will be referencing arcane to compare sibling // familial dynamics and how the respective medias represented them.

.

as adora is our main protagonist and catra was an main antagonist, a lot of the show's focus is on their characters and arcs ( or a lack thereof ). however, because of the blatant favoritism of catra over adora, rather than it being relatively equal or at least addressed in a more healthier way, this results in both the show and fandom diminishing adora's trauma and showcasing catra's.

the "you vs. me" conflict is a standard trope in fiction and is very much a struggle relationships have in real life, due to many issues including, but not excluded to, honesty, deceit, manipulation, accountability issues, anger issues, victimization, villainization, etc.

in fact, in terms of it being a trope, you could say that almost all of fiction relies on this, especially with protagonist vs. antagonist scenarios, such as batman & joker, superman & lex luthor, sonic & eggman, aang & ozai, korra & kuvira, or, in this case, adora & catra.

but when i'm referencing this trope, i'm specifically referring it to be in a familial context, such as zuko & azula, eda & lilith, vi & jinx, and so on and so forth.

now, what makes adora and catra so different from most other relationships that fall under this trope is because of one problem:

inconsistency.

despite the abuse being the center reason why adora and catra are separated and at odds with each other, the show is more focused on the effects of catra's trauma rather than the cause.

she is flippant with shadow weaver, doesn't hold her in very high regard as an authority or maternal figure, and just generally doesn't show any possible affection or positive emotion towards shadow weaver unless it has something to do with proving her wrong until s2, when s1 already establishes a hostile relationship between the two and catra explicitly stating she doesn't need shadow weaver.

now, this isn't to say that the cycle of abuse is a straight line. the writers can have catra show animosity towards shadow weaver and still make a relationship where she ends up being the victim of manipulation and hostility. but how they did it is the issue.

let's compare her story to jinx's.

parental situation - unlike catra, powder did not have a negative relationship with vander. but it wasn't a necessarily positive one, either. it was more awkward, silent, and not really given a chance to grow and develop into something more loving.

i don't doubt vander cared for powder, but it wasn't the exact way he cared for vi. the only thing they had in common was that they loved vi, but even that was in different ways ( parent // sibling ).

meanwhile, catra's relationship with shadow weaver has no actual room for plausible deniability on either end, but more importantly, catra's end.

there's no mother gothel-esc scene where shadow weaver love-bombs and gaslights her, no 'loving' manipulation, there's barely even a power imbalance, it's just animosity on both ends in the establishing season.

all of those scenes are towards adora instead, creating a rapunzel // mother gothel dynamic, like mentioned, as shadow weaver groomed her, used her for power, and raised her to be the perfect child soldier.

akin to mother gothel, after adora left the horde, shadow weaver become hyper-focused on getting her back and returning to the status quo, and both abusers do this by manipulation, sabotage, gaslighting, and instilling fear into their victims.

we don't get this with catra until s2.

the reason why this doesn't work is because:

catra is fully aware of the horde

catra is fully aware of shadow weaver

catra references // insults adora for being manipulated

catra establishing she doesn't need or want shadow weaver

catra broke shadow weaver's mask // source of power

all in s1.

which is why, when you watch s2, you might be wondering "why did she fall for that?" if you recall earlier scenes of basically admonishing adora for being a victim of abuse herself.

"she was desperate!" you say. but just because catra was desperate doesn't mean that she had to change her tune, especially since shadow weaver has literally no power over her.

it'd make a lot more sense for her to make a deal with shadow weaver rather than suddenly questioning shadow weaver on why she abused her, then begging her to help.

maybe, if the writers still wanted to continue with the cycle of abuse, the deal could've been a way for catra to be slowly manipulated and throw her off, anyway. because she was once on equal footing with her abusive mother, but now is beneath her for xyz reasons.

writing wise, it just makes no sense for us to be sympathetic to catra in s2 when it's been shown several times that any chance of a less than hostile relationship is impossible between them because they both hate each other.

origin of villainy - now, from catra's perspective, she blames adora and sometimes shadow weaver for her 'downfall', but simultaneously continues to have her own independence and choice to become evil. this is something the show states bluntly, despite still being wishy-washy in s5. catra chose to stay. catra chose to be evil.

the true origin of her choices lie in wanting to be powerful and ruling over the horde as revenge for who looked down on her ( shadow weaver, mainly ).

in fact, she pretty much says so in this line ( in 'Promise', s1 ):

"i don't WANT to leave. what don't you understand about that? i'm not afraid of shadow weaver anymore, and i'm a better force captain than you could've ever been."

catra desires power over love, but relied on adora to get that power through several years of abuse that continues on in their older teen, young adult lives.

what's the first thing that catra does when adora strays?

she electrocutes her, twice, and threatens to do it again.

she portrays it like it was an accident, but her face right after she shocks adora the first time is pure anger. when the moment passes, there's no apologetic look, she looks more 'awkward, if anything.

then when adora tries to get up, she shocks her again and justifies it by saying it was a "reflex". while i think she's full of shit, i do think this line holds at least some truth, as catra's had a clear pattern of putting adora in physical harm when she gets 'out of line' ever since they were kids.

like catra, powder does believe that her source of villainy ( if she even sees it as that, at first ) is also from vi leaving her. however, powder has more reason to believe she was abandoned than catra does.

why?

choice.

catra had a blatant, clear, on the table choice to join the rebellion and leave the horde, have a healthier, happier life, and stay away from shadow weaver. every time adora asks ( 3 times ), she doesn't push catra once she says no, but accepts it, however disappointed she may be, which is a stark contrast to how catra reacts to rejection.

neither vi or powder had the choice of staying together and running away. vi had a reaction that most people would have when powder accidentally killed basically their whole family, but she showed immense regret and walked away to take a breather.

but, as she wasn't able to communicate that, powder saw that as vi leaving and not coming back.

and then silco came in. vi was going to go back, going to try to save powder, but then marcus got involved, knocked her out, and took her to prison.

basically, fate fucked around with them. it was all just bad timing. neither vi or powder could play with the cards they were dealt with.

catra basically said "no, fuck you" and then turned around and victimized herself over and over, while still trying to maintain her own autonomy at the same time.

developing villainy // spiral - powder turning into jinx is tragic because it all started from an accident. because powder was a child that didn't mean to hurt or kill anyone and was taken advantage of in her time of need. because while suffering from psychosis and abandonment, silco preyed on her ( i'm not going to debate this with you, don't start a fight in the comments ).

catra turning into a horde general is visually displayed as devastating in s4, but it's very weak, writing wise, once you take a look at the full picture for all of its amateurish details.

catra participated in all of this willingly. it's very difficult to sympathize with someone who knows what they're doing and doesn't give a damn about who they're hurting.

catra's already had spirals. s1, s2, and s3. if you take off the rose-colored glasses, this gets exhausting and feels more pathetic than anything else.

catra's worst was in s3, not s4. and it was only about shadow weaver for maybe five minutes until it went back to being about her obsession for adora to be her meat shield. you can't really get any worse than destroying the entire universe, engaging in extreme sadism, and killing a monarch all out of spite for one person.

this was, supposedly, her wake-up call season, but catra doesn't change until s5 and the 'wake-up call' is garbage, telling us that she didn't mean any of the things she did or said, she didn't mean to hurt and abuse people, she didn't mean to send entrapta off to beast island, she didn't mean to threaten scorpia multiple times, yada, yada, yada, while also potentially victim-blaming her, and also saying "well, fuck you, it's all your fault lol". it's sloppy.

she had a mental breakdown because scorpia left her? oh no. how sad.

she starts hallucinating scorpia's laugh and thinks she's coming back? oh wow. tragic.

she starts pushing people away, for the millionth time, and victimizing herself again? aww. who woulda thunk it.

all of it falls under "what did you expect?" when you look through the many holes in SPOP's story.

and yet, despite it all, despite the fact that she committed universal genocide, death of a monarch, aggravated assault // attempted murder, attempted murder // suicide, etc., etc...

she's 'redeemed' by a hallucination in a ship that somehow tells her that she was the one who drove adora away, when she fucking knows that already.

jinx is eventually aware of herself and vi, as much as she can be, and continues the path to villainy because she's already gone too far. vi may forgive her, but she's killed a lot of people and is a criminal. not a petty thief, but a murderer.

the show helps us sympathize with jinx, but they don't erase what her actions, they don't erase her crimes, and still embrace writing her as a villain // antagonist that can't and won't go back.

catra has bare minimum sympathy from me. it's terrible that she was abused, but the show doesn't write it well or consistently enough for me to fully care and go "it's really sad that she's become a bad person", but rather "if you died, i'd be thankful".

that's harsh, maybe, but i don't see any other option, except for her being jailed for life, as a satisfying conclusion for her. because i don't care enough to wish a better life for her in canon.

the "you vs. me" problem in SPOP is that catra is constantly pushing this ideology in almost every single situation, even when it is not applicable, and it forces fans to view it the same, if not worse.

it's not specifically about shadow weaver, but more about what can give catra control in whichever situation that can allow her to victimize herself and // or dominate the other party.

and, as a result, to this day, catra is still seen as the biggest victim of the entire cast.

[swordsandarms]

i know you just tend to lurk (me too) but your fandomised rhaegar thoughts are very validating lol. ive always thought blue roses are symbolic of a child born from love, not symbolic of a woman. like lyanna has the roses cause she's jon's mother and rhaegar's love, not because they're her "thing"? never thought that was far fetched til coming online lmao.

OK, this was in my drafts for like a decade.

The roses aren't really the child or the woman, but a representation of the (tragic, but bittersweet) love itself. Though, of course, Jon as the "fruit"/"proof" of it is still at the centre of it all.

Used to hate the concept of "tragedy" and not understand how that can be compelling/satisfying. Turns out a lot of tragedy is badly done, hence the feeling of meaningless/pointlessness of it all some of them give you. Look at HOTD. The problem with the writing is that everything is made meaningless, not that your "favourite" isn't winning everything. It is the fact that it's all bitter and no sweet at the end of the day. (Not the book version, which is also a matter of how much better ASOIAF handles the "continuation" of the tragedy better than GOT).

I see Rhaelya as a representation of the concept: "The love was there. It didn't save anyone, it didn't change anything, but the love was there."

Once you get to look at it like that, it becomes very annoying when people in the fandom sound like a broken record of "what's nice about this?? EveRYoNE dIeS". Yeah, that's how tragedies work, but look at it as such and you'll see the nice, too.

It's not about how "oh, why would you think the author is trying to paint Romeo and Juliet as a romance when he liked Rosaline before, and now suddenly her overnight?"/"oh, it's all about how they are dumb teenagers messing up"/"oh, isn't Orpheus the dumbest for turning round".

Romeo and Juliet are young people finding a shiny thing in a shitty society that creates generational cycles of pain and hate for stupid reasons. The ending is satisfying not because the love is successful but because the characters - and readers are meant to - finally get that. Orpheus turns round because he loves Eurydice and if you did you would, too.

Westeros is a hellscape of ambition, heartlessness, and corruption. Everyone is stabbing everyone's back for a bit more of land, a bit more of wealth, a bit more political influence. Selling and pawning their loved ones for a corn chip. (Controversial opinion, neither Elia or Lyanna should have been in that position, but that's the reason why, "loving families" and all. Even more Controversial, Rhaegar shouldn't have been in that position also. And that's the "good" people - as Controversial as people might think that statement is for Rhaegar. But also OH, you mean selling off Cersei didn't work out well cause she was meant to be a pretty object and didn't have to be taught about armies and resources, just vanity? Or Lysa for some reason wasn't all that grateful to papa to give armies to the great alliance when they needed them, for reasons of keeping the one "trueborn child" she had sheltered, cause that's the one thing you promised her she could get if she did your bidding?) Looking away from what is fair when it is "lawful" according to the status quo (and fandom finds it easy to pinpoint it when it's someone deemed hateworthy, but will be 1000% lenient towards a Ned Stark, and will even hold characters they hate accountable when putting FAIRNESS ABOVE LAW).

And the thing about ASOIAF fandom is THEY LOVE THIS SHIT. They love to romanticise it all. But there's the paradox of it all. Romanticising comes with this idea of unrealistic wistfulness, I guess. If a character lives in "the cruel real world", the romanticised ideal is nice to think about. If they actually reach for ideals, they are fools who should get real about living in the "cruel real world".

Oop, I ventured far from the point. But I just love the whole CONCEPT of the blue rose at its roots. 💙 It literally means just that at its roots. Something wistful but unattainable.

[mins-fins]

space science.

&&. poor you, poor miserable, troubled, unfavorable you.

pairing: liu yangyang x m!reader

genre: angst, bittersweet tragedy 🙁

warnings: mentions of abuse

word count: 1.7k

notes: i wanted to make people sad today guys 😆 okay i didnt mean to make this my yangyang fic debut on my account and im sorry but you guys.. it's just needed okay! i need to make a whole wayv angst thing wait………(hendery is next 😈)

"what do you wanna be when you grow up?"

you whisper against yangyang's ears, eyes closed as you lean your head onto his shoulder. your arms were wrapped around his chest, leaning on his shoulders as he carried you on his back, his hands rested on your thighs. yangyang's eyes trailed over the path before him, observing the familiar rock pattern littering the ground, one he recognizes.

yangyang had nothing in mind, too focused on the weight on his back, seemingly unbothered even with how long the two of you have been walking.

"i don't know yet.." he mutters, his voice low as he continued walking, showing no signs of tiredness in his voice or actions. he continued to walk forward, venturing through the forest down a familiar path, one he'd walk down so many times when he was younger.

you hold onto yangyang tightly, scared he might be mad at having to carry you. that probably isn't the case, especially because he's never had any trouble carrying you before, but that doesn't stop the thoughts from invading your mind.

"does y/n still dream of becoming an astronaut?" yangyang asks, his shoes stepping on rocks and dust, creating sounds that echoed in the forest. his question is meant to be a distraction for you, it's meant to make you forget the pain you are currently in. the more he thought about it, the more he remembered details of your life that he thought he'd long since forgotten.

it was when you two were in elementary school, you told him that you wanted to be an astronaut when you grew up.

i want to see the stars up close! he remembers you exclaiming, so passionately, eyes shining so bright, it was like they were stars themselves.

years have passed, and that dream was nothing more than the fantasies created by a child. you created it as an escape, the stars in the sky were the only things that truly gave you hope in times where you were suffering at home.

whenever you couldn't take it, you'd find yourself at a familiar place, your safe place, as you liked to call it, a place that only the two of you knew about. a small secluded treehouse in the forest behind his parents house, where you could escape from the chaos of your home life, where you could peacefully sit and stare the stars.

you'd always make wishes on the stars, hoping that one day, your life would become just a little more bearable, that mom wouldn't be mad at you all the time, that your dreams would become a reality in somehow or another.

you had now been reduced to nothing but a fragile human being, one who couldn't be put back together no matter how much yangyang tried.

"i don't want to anymore.." you mutter, blinking your tears away as you stare at yangyang's face. you give a sad smile, and continue. "i just want to be with you forever" you whisper, hiding your face in his neck.

yangyang smiles bitterly at the statement, the chances of that happening was slim to none. it was an innocent statement, yes, but with the way you two had turned out, the idea of you two staying seemed more harmful to you than anything.

yangyang loves you, really, he does— but he can't help you.

his emotions always confuse him when he's with you, he can't control the overwhelming sadness, anger, or happiness he feels when around you.

but what can he even do? it's not like you did all of this to yourself, you were never given a happy life because your mother is a bitter women, hated seeing you turn into everything she couldn't— to the point that she'd destroy anything that made you happy.

he could never do anything to help you, all he could do was watch, observe. he would see all the new bruises on your body and be absolutely useless in the situation.

he would always offer to carry you when you were especially hurt, which pretty much became the thing for you too. there would be moments where you'd be too slow, so hurt that walking would hurt you, and yangyang wouldn't even ask, he'd just let you jump on his back and he'd carry you to your safe place.

sometimes, yangyang feels guilty, because no matter what, he can't save you.

sometimes; not always.

helping you has always been yangyang's thing, from the moment the two of you met at five, the idea of being able to help you, save you from the nightmare which was your moms house, was what constantly reassured him.

he promised you that someday, he'd get you out of there, that the two of you could run away together forever, and you wouldn't have to worry about your parents, or school, or hurting.

you were so beautiful, so innocent, you had a smile so bright it seemed that you could heal all disasters with it. yangyang never knew why the urge to protect you seemed to come naturally, but it just did, you didn't deserve to be in that kind of environment, he couldn't believe the kinds of things your mom put you through.

you were vulnerable, so easy to break.

and so is he— but yangyang would never admit it, because the idea of anybody seeing that side of him made him want to vomit, no one, and he means no one is allowed to know that, because it's stupid, it's idiotic, it's—

he can't explain it, he feels like he's wasting his time trying to come up with excuses in his mind.

he doesn't even know if he can muster up enough mind to actually look at you.

your a crybaby, weak, pathetic, stupid—

oh poor poor y/n, poor sad y/n, poor y/n who can't stand up for himself, poor y/n who still believes the stars will save him, poor little y/n whose been reduced to nothing but a fragile mess!

though the words always work their way into yangyang's mind, he could never leave you behind.

yangyang finally stops, having made it to the destination you begged him to take you too.

he originally wanted to refuse— because after all this time you couldn't just keep running away from your problems, choosing to go to some treehouse in the middle of a forest and wishing on the stars instead of confronting your issues head on, like you should be.

but no matter how hard he tried, yangyang didn't refuse, just bit his tongue and agreed. making you unhappy was the last thing he wanted to do, you were hurt, in pain, unwell, and if this was the one thing he could do for you, then so be it.

yangyang curses himself for easily being influenced by you..

"yangyang.. i love you" you whisper, voice shaky as you spoke. yangyang hums, hiking you higher up his back as he climbs the stairs to your safe place.

"i love you too, y/n.." he says back, his expression remaining empty as he gives a mere glance at your face, at your watery eyes.

yangyang slowly takes you off his back, placing you down onto the couch right beside the entrance. he performs the action gently, as if afraid of breaking you if he dropped you down too recklessly.

your obsessed, says yangyang's friends, you've become too attached to him, always clinging onto him no matter what. you shouldn't be putting all your issues onto his shoulders, being dependent on him to always help you when your in need, he deserves better, they all say, better than you.

yangyang knows you too well to even be annoyed by how you act anymore. your presence has become comforting to him, it's not exactly easy to explain, because he'd probably come off as creepy if he even tried to voice his thoughts about you, he's just so used to you being there beside him—

like there's something wrong when you aren't there with him.

people say that the love you harbor for yangyang isn't normal, your more infatuated than in love, people say that yangyang should run while he has the chance..

but yangyang knows more than they do, you could never truly hurt him even if you wanted to, you can't even hurt a fly, let alone hurt him. he's pretty much the only person keeping you up, you'd be gone if he wasn't around, you need him.

he's the only person you can count on, your mother is shitty and your father is gone.

"are we going to look at the stars?" your voice snaps yangyang out his distracting thoughts process, and you immediately circle your arms around his waist when he places himself beside you.

yangyang lets you squeeze him, your cold fingers rub against the skin of his waist, but he doesn't even shiver at the touch anymore, instead settling into the solace of it, a feeling he recognizes from you.

he doesn't respond immediately, instead pointing up at the opening in the ceiling, where they could clearly see the stars through the glass. yangyang had installed it into the treehouse himself so you could stare at the stars without having to go outside.

"orion" he states, his other arm coming to rest around your waist. "and ursa major".

"i guess were not seeing cassiopeia tonight.." you mutter, not exactly to yangyang, but more to yourself. your voice conveys disappointment, but you quickly shake off whatever thoughts you were having.

"you can still make a wish, though".

yangyang knows you, he knows you so well, it was often that you'd make a wish when you saw the constellation cassiopeia, thinking of it as a good luck charm because of it's connection to your birthday.

you lower your head, eyes pointed to the floor. "they never come true anyway.."

yangyang slowly retracts his hand and moves it to intertwine your fingers, he doesn't say any more, and neither do you, a comfortable silence settles between you two.

"aren't you afraid y/n?"

the question is a surprising one, but you don't say much about it, just let out an airy laugh, giving a little squeeze at his hand. "i'll be alright because your here".

a small smile comes to your face, but it's sad, your unwell, your sick, your sad, and yangyang can't help you, no matter how much he tries.

oh poor you—

whose been reduced to nothing but a fragile mess.

[wiitzend]

the problem with this whole child stars situation and that brings me back to cole sprouse’s interview (yeah, i know he is problematic too) but he spoke about how his mom pushed him both him and his brother to work as a kids to sort of full-fill her dreams as an artist and also to help them financially since she was a single mom and i get that but this is the thing that also demi lovato said, at one point she wants financially sustaining her entire family and this creates a weird power imbalance where she not longer viewed her mom as a authority figure because she was acting as the breadwinner of the family.

a lot of parents know they’re setting up their kids to this situations and yet want to ignore it because they want the money and for their child’s to keep paying the bills. only alexa nickola’s mom was like yeah no, we’re leaving at the first sign that something was really wrong.

alyson stoner in her podcast (worth watching) also speaks about how if you notice a lot of the productions nowadays take place in states where rules against child actors aren’t in action for example altlanta so it’s easier for production to manipulate it. I know a big portion of child actors have had some horrible experiences at some degree and most don’t want to either relieve that or admit that it happened to them. and that’s fair.

i agree 100%.

i genuinely don't understand a parent's wish to live vicariously through their own children and push them to become child stars when they willingly know the dangers that can come from that. if you have to work extra hours as a single parent to support your children then that's what just what you have to do as an adult. you never made it in hollywood and you're still bitter because of that? too damn bad. get over it. some of these parents play an equal hand in their children's abuse and they need to be held accountable as well.

i think it's incredibly valid that some child actors don't want to reveal that happened to them when working on these tv shows/movies. some of these stories are pretty horrific, i just hope they get the help they need to heal and move on so the people who abused them won't be able to steal another minute of their peace and well-being.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

The Girl Who Accidentally Broke The Universe

Hi, so I've had a little bit of interest on here recently about the book I've written and am currently querying so thank you guys for that, I've honestly taken a little creative hit because publishing is a tough industry to break into and the rejection is quite draining but I'm really trying to fall back in love with my manuscript right now so I thought I'd tell you all a bit about it!

A lonely goddess. A girl who's the last of her kind. A lost boy. A garden child. A missing princess. A monster. And the end of the universe. What could go wrong?

Oh, that's right - everything.

Meet Kala Sparsdon: the girl who broke the entire universe

… Twice.

In her defence, it was an accident. Sort of. Up until around eight months ago, Kala had about as normal a life as she thought she'd get - yes, it's a bit boring, and yes, she's haunted by her constant nightmares, and yes, she has no idea what she's supposed to do with her life, but she's happy and safe and all she needs in the world is the love and support of her best friend Olivia Greene. But when Olivia is killed before her eyes and Kala flees the crime scene in panic, everything she's ever known is thrown into question. As she runs from Olivia's attacker, she meets the mysterious Sienna Haden and Karter Kershaw - who claim not to be human. What started as night terrors becomes an all too real world of magic, mystery, politics, and danger as a bewildered Kala is named the saviour of this enticing new society on the verge of war with its own gods.

The Girl Who Accidentally Broke the Universe is a retrospective narrative recorded by a group of historians attempting to create an accurate and accessible account of the supposed end of the universe. Their first point of call for interview was Kala and she agreed to help create the account on the condition that it must be told almost entirely in her own voice. Upon agreement from the historians, Kala recorded herself explaining her story for it to be transcribed by an editor, who adds further details, any necessary explanations, and occasionally personal opinions to the story through footnotes over the course of the book.

As much as I have a never-ending love/hate relationship with my own writing, I know that I truly love this story and I had so much fun writing it (even if sometimes it made me want to bang my head against a table) and it would mean the absolute world to me to one day be able to share it as an actual book. If anyone wants to hear anything more about it in the future then please let me know, and thanks so much for reading this post because even just this little bit is (excluding the industry) the most I've shared about it anywhere except for in long rants to my friends (who I'm sure are fed up of hearing it by now, love you my darlings thanks for putting up with me)

[wildpeachfarm]

this is meant lighthearted : instead of “all men are trash, women do no wrong” a secret third thing “PEOPLE suck in general”

as someone who grew up with an absent father who tried to make life difficult for my mother once she took him to court for child support for me and my siblings - ing…I grew up with a not nice view of older men BUT my grandpa was a big big influence in not making men a negative experience for us.

the recent shift of the last 4-5 years has been worrying. I used to liked jkr and could emphasize where she was coming from originally. but it was scary to see the gradual descent into where she is now and the stuff she is saying. Bc she is so far removed from what she originally stood for. It can happen to anyone, I even get worried if I’m on that slope sometimes. This whole situation had me second guessing myself bc I gave gnf time and believed in him. I had a moment when a few female creators made remarks (not from mc community) and I checked myself bc I was scared I was falling into the conservative rhetoric to blame women and protect men. Then I saw others who had more information and actually looked into it and also found this blog where the nuances were being discussed and let out a breath of relief that I was just using my critical thinking skills lmao

There are so many men out there who just aren’t given a chance bc society is set up for them to fall into a certain role. And I think a lot of men are trying to break that role and stereotypes. I became a dream fan bc I saw him doing this, saw a gamerboy in 2020 who was passionate and excelled at the game but didn’t fall into the toxicity of the space, actively fought against it.

and women should not be encouraged to drag men through hell bc they feel empowered by the rhetoric of recent years. women can and are just as selfish and shitty people as men. Sometimes they are worse

we’ve gone so far off center, we’ve essentially gone from one extreme to another. Which I learned two years ago was called terfs 😂 the movement needs to go back to its previous meaning. Feminism is not solely female empowerment it is the deconstructing of the patriarchal roles and belief that push men and women into boxes. Feminism, as I was taught over a decade ago, was the fight for women and MEN to be equal and have the same rights and opportunities. We can uplift women without putting down men. if this feminist movement doesn’t correct itself, it will allow more men like andrew tate to grow and influence young men.

The lack of female representation in the sphere cannot be corrected by women. It just can’t. Men need to be part of the change bc if the environment is not corrected, women cannot succeed and thrive. They can become successful but the hate and obstacles directed towards them is crazy. This is in general not just for streaming.

It can’t just be women solidarity, men need to learn and actively engage in calling out misogynist behavior. Women need to talk with their males friends and call them out when they say or act in disgusting ways. Women need to hold women accountable as well! It is unfair and unattainable to put female equality solely in the hands of women. We need to All work together.

Puffy is so good at this when she streams, especially on the smp. Hell, she even created a whole villain arc to call out the people telling her to “be a therapist to Tommy, omg your like dreams mom”. Puffy is awesome 🥹

men =/ bad

women =/ good

PREACH ANON

this breaks it all down so well and i really sympathize with you about having a poor view of some men in your life and trying to not let that influence your views but also not go so far off the other end that you end up blindly defending them without critical thinking.

Really important discussions and introspection about how your thought processes work that I think everyone should have at least once when situations like this come up

[barebevil]

I'll start with my pitch. This is a full soliloquy that i break out into whenever i talk to someone who shows just the barest modicum of interest in reading the book. I'm a great conversationalist don't worry about it. THE TRAITOR BARU CORMORANT IS A BOOK ABOUT BARU CORMORANT. When baru is a child her home is subject to foreign imperial expansion, by means of economics and education, she is discovered by an agent of this empire to be a math genius and is enrolled in an imperial school where she makes it her mission to prove herself an impress the powers that be in order to earn a favorable position and climb the hierarchy of power within the empire, for you see she means to behold the very machinations of the imperial machine. and she means to burn it all down from the inside. but in order to do so, to climb, to impress, she has to compromise everything about herself. she cant have personal values, personal relationships, morals, and no goals but this one: more power and more influence. She cannot be herself or she will doom herself and everything she's already sacrificed will have been for naught. (At this point is when I'll usually pivot and say the following--) I've cried over a book before, I've been moved to tears by books before, sometimes because something is sad, or it is joyous, whatever. i've cried over books before is the point, and i thought, as i was nearing the end of THE TRAITOR BARU CORMORANT that perhaps this would be such an instance. I thought, and no spoilies but, well, i was in the final stretch and thought that probably the end might make me cry. Reader it did not. Have you ever read something that was so viscerally upsetting that you skipping right past crying and went straight to nausea? because that's what happened to me. Not one tear, but a single sentence made me feel like i was genuinely going to throw up. Fuck this book is so fucking good. I really thought i might throw up thats how sad and upset i was. and it was PERFECT. What happened was exactly what needed to happen. Again, no spoilies but oh my god. Nauseous. AND THAT'S JUST THE FIRST BOOK. We then follow Baru as she achieves every single one of her goals, and goes more insane in the process. With every victory she destroys herself more, with every sacrifice she curries more favor. And she only becomes more insane and more horny. And now you may ask yourself, what does horny have to do with it? EVERYTHING. The higher she climbs, the more she injures and destroys and compromises herself, the more separation she creates between her mind and her body, the more removed she becomes from herself, the harder it becomes to unify the two, to satisfy any carnal need, harder to do as much as identify her own desires much less realize them. She loses herself, she wins, she loses more, she wins more.

The most common criticism i've seen online of the first book in the serious is that it's boring. First of all get better soon. second of all, YES Baru is an accountant she deals a lot in economic policy and money and numbers but oh my god its THRILLINGGGGG. I happen to find math quite romantic and poetic and I know that's not everyone's bag, but when in book 2 a whole page is dedicated to the description of one mathematical axiom as a metaphor for a situation Baru is trying to deal with, here i WAS almost moved to tears. It's such a good book.

Oh and did I mention? (I did not) The characters are all fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. It's wall to wall fucking hits, Seth Dickinson my close personal friend Seth Dickinson oh my god your mind your mind!!!!!!!!!!!

[arithedingas]

realized i haven't posted a single thing about river on here so have her ref + her eventual staff and a couple of aus (info about everything under the cut)

River

child of the mistress and alice, following the events of "stingstress"

raised in ultraprison, so she doesn't really see alice as a parent in any way

bruce is basically her stepfather

very much a hippie, though with a heavily suppressed sadistic side

likes giving nicknames hehe

like the mistress, she's capable of drastic changes in personality. however, river's is triggered by anything that takes away her optimism, and essentially turns her into a beatnik lol

River's staff

when river inherits ultraprison/starts her own branch of ultraprison she's pretty much given a bunch (or maybe all) of the mistress' robots

due to both loneliness and wanting to give her "workers" the freedom of choice she pretty much tried to install freewill/sentience into all of them

most of them either a) ended up being destroyed in the process, b) created very dangerous robots that needed to be put down anyways, or c) pretty much left as soon as they could. the four pictured are pretty much the only successful ones that stuck around

Lily ("Lil")

river's first successful (comparatively at least) attempt at giving a robot free will and it not either leaving or going crazy

basically river's right-hand woman and advisor, she checks up on the other staff members and gives river status reports regularly

despite her free will she isn't much of an independent thinker, being essentially a yes-man to river on anything, much to river's chagrin ("what was the point in me giving you free will if you're not going to use it?")

Lewis ("Lewey" or "Loo Loo", formerly "Lewisia")

he covers accounting/budgeting, file upkeep, and even medical matters when necessary, as well as any other minor tasks that need to be done around rivers prison

he's a bit stoic and can be a know-it-all at times lol

Lilac and Lavender ("Lila" and "Lav")

prison guards essentially

lilac tends to be too lenient, while lav is too vicious/domineering, so river always keeps them together so that they can balance each other out

The Matron AU

basically the mistress changes back to her old self early enough into river's childhood that she's still impressionable

river grows up to become known as "the matron", a warden who's just as harsh and domineering as her mother, if not more so due to her sadism, which she doesn't try suppressing at all

Lady "R" AU

the mistress changes back to her old self during rivers teen years

needless to say, a large rift is formed between the mistress and river, ultimately culminating in river running away

eventually she adopts the alias "lady r" and starts her new life as a radical anarchist-activist, with a focus on prison abolition

she pretty much tries to shut down/destroy as many jails/prisons as possible, with a major focus on eventually destroying Ultraprison

while superjail isn't as big a target on her list as Ultraprison, she still hopes to destroy it too eventually. And maybe she does? Or at the very least does a lot of damage to it lol

[wearentdelulu]

Into you~ Chapter three🔞

The weekend rolled by in a blur. Kook spent the entire time working out and debating on what to say to ‘A’. He didn’t understand why it’s taking him this long to message her, but every time he attempts to type out a message he deletes it. And this pisses him off. Why the hell is he so hesitant? The more he thinks about how ridiculous he’s being the more frustrated he becomes and when he’s frustrated he needs to fuck. It’s the only healthy outlet he can think of.

He calls Yuna only to be left with her voicemail. Is she serious? This is the second time this month that this has happened. What’s the point of a fuck buddy when she’s almost never available? He throws his phone on his bed thinking of something to do to get his mind off of things. He looks at his monitor and thinks if he should stream. Maybe he could tease ‘A’ a little bit. So that’s exactly what he does. As he streams and looks over at the comments he feels a sense of pride knowing that ‘A’ is somewhere in there watching him. She’s probably shaking in her boots as he speaks.

“Oh? You all seen my instagram story?” He chuckles. “What can I say? The letter ‘A’ just might be my favorite letter now.”

Yeah that’ll get her for sure. He would love to see her reaction to his words. He knows for a fact that he’s getting her worked up over this, and he loves it.

Meanwhile Anya was sleeping. She stayed up late the whole weekend trying to convince herself that Kook isn’t interested in her. He’s just doing fan service, but Anya catches herself practically stalking his instagram account. She can’t help but picture what he could look like. Is he tall? He’s definitely muscular by the way he talks about how much he works out. What color are his eyes? What does his smile look like? She lets out a sigh and takes a deep breath, her mind going overdrive. It was now almost 4:00am she should rest but every time she closes her eyes she pictures a faceless man hovering over her.

“Mmm you’re dreaming about me?”

She hears a familiar voice. The voice she can pick out from a crowd of people. Her subconscious mind creating the illusion of Kook in her dreams. She follows the voice in her dreams, the sound echoed through her mind.

“A…..”

“Kook….” She finds herself in the darkness with a single light in the distance. As she walks towards the light she sees a tall figure in the middle. His back was faced away from her. Was that Kook? What did he want? She stops behind him and takes a deep breath. Who could this be?Hesitantly she taps his shoulder and a familiar face turns to her.

“Jeon?” She said confused. Why is he here? Where did Kook go? Jeon opens his mouth to speak but before she could hear his voice she wakes up to a notification from her phone. “What the hell?” What kind of dream was that? She stretches and looks over at the time. Damn she really slept in late. She reached for her phone and checks the notification.

Her heart stops.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Kook ends the stream satisfied with the amount of flirting he did. For some reason Kook really enjoys this. He pictures a faceless girl blushing like a child at his words. It’s like doing fan service, but since when did he have this much fun doing it? Maybe it’s because the way ‘A’ is so bold. First she praises him and then she’s calling him cocky. She’s different and Kook likes it. He always had a thing for girls who stood up for themselves. It was hot. Most women in his case would drop to their knees if he gave them a glance. It was flattering of course but it gets boring over time.

Kook stands up and walks into the living room with a satisfied smile on his face. He sees Jimin scrolling on his phone, he clears his throat trying to get his attention.

“Let me guess……she called me an asshole?” Kook says flopping next to Jimin. “No no that’s too easy. Mmm she called me a dick didn’t she?”

Jimin looks at him with a confused expression. “What are you talking about?”

Kook huffs out a laugh. Now of all times Jimin was to play dumb. Kook isn’t stupid. “What did she tell you this time?”

“Who?” Jimin says furrowing his eyebrows. Kook rolls his eyes, tiring of playing this stupid guessing game.

“A, I know she texted you while I was on stream. So what did she say this time?”

“She didn’t text me. I don’t even think she’s online.” Kook’s smile falls. What? She didn’t even see the stream? She’s always in his streams, she’s a fan. Why the hell wasn’t she there to see him flirt with her? “I gave you her username why don’t you just text her and ask yourself.”

That’s true he does have her username. Why the hell didn’t she join the live? That’s a reasonable question to ask her, isn’t it? After days of not knowing what to say to her he seems like this is a good way to start. So he grabs his phone and goes to message her.

Kook?! He texted her?! How did he even manage to get her information? Anya blinks a few times to make sure this isn’t a dream. Kook actually texted her. Okay okay she needs to relax and just reply back before he loses interest.

Wow he’s persistent. Who knew he was this straight forward. Oh right Anya knew, because she knew almost everything about him.

Kook grins at his phone. A feeling of excitement in his eyes. She sure didn’t hold back. He expected her to be fangirling over him maybe even apologizing to him, but nope she’s just the same. Kook gets up from his spot next to Jimin and goes into his room to finish the conversation with ‘A’.

Kook flops on his bed smiling once again at his phone, loving the reaction he’s getting from her.

Anya was slightly still freaking out, but she really liked the attention she’s getting from him. He went out of his way to privately text her just because she overslept and missed his live. Does he do this with his other fans? Why text her privately? Does he care? Anya shakes her head and just decides to be in this moment with him. Who knows when this will happen again.

Kook stays up all night texting back and forth with ‘A’ it’s almost 2:00am and he never stays up this late, especially when he has classes tomorrow morning. But Kook didn’t want to stop. He wanted to make sure he had her undivided attention since she missed his live. Maybe he likes the attention or maybe it’s something else, he doesn’t know what yet. Eventually exhaustion catches up to him and he falls asleep and lucky for him so does ‘A’. He falls asleep feeling satisfied and a sense of peace. It was a new and weird feeling that Kook wasn’t used to and he doesn’t want it to stop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours turned into a few days of straight texting back and forth with Kook. Anya didn’t expect this to last this long. She definitely didn’t expect this to feel so easy. Talking to him feels so comfortable and relaxed despite his cockiness. Even that didn’t annoy her like she thought it might. She’s been so attached to texting Kook she completely forgets about Jeon……until he bumps into her on the way to class. Her head was down looking at her phone replying back to a stupid gif Kook sent her, before she could send her message she feels her shoulder bump into someone else’s. She looks up to be face to face with Jeon. She’s never been this close to him before and she immediately panics.

“I-I’m so sorry I….I wasn’t paying attention…” she says looking at anything but those pretty doe eyes. Gosh they look even better up close. He looks at her with a nonchalant expression. Is he mad? Angry? Annoyed? In love? Just kidding he’s not in love. Anya couldn’t read his expression so she feels like she should leave. “I’m really sorry.” She says taking a step back, but she bumps into someone else. The small gap that separated her and Jeon was immediately closed up. As she was just about to fall he catches her by her waist. Her hands landing on his shoulders. Then she does the thing she shouldn’t have. She looks up. Her eyes meeting his in a heated gaze.

“Are-…..” he whispers but stops himself. She’s never heard him speak and she couldn’t hear him whispering with the loud background. The two of them stay like this until Anya pulls away feeling way too delusional right now.

“I-I’m sorry again I…I um….” She takes a deep breath stilling her nerves. Come on Anya don’t embarrass yourself in front of the hottest guy…..ever. She reaches a hand out. “Uh hi my name is-

“Hey.” A beautiful girl says as she walks up towards Jeon, putting her hand with his. Anya recognizes her…..It’s Yuna……probably the most beautiful girl in the entire school. Of course they’re dating. It makes sense after all. Hot guy, hot girl they’re a power couple. Anya pulls her hand away, feeling stupid for attempting to introduce herself. What did she think would happen? “oh hey I’m Anya I’ve seen you before in class and you’re really hot, wanna get married?” It was stupid and Anya feels embarrassed. She tries to hide her disappointment not wanting to look like a pathetic loser in front of them. “Sorry again…..um bye.” She walks away in the different directions not evening knowing where she’s supposed to go.

Kook watches her leaving feeling a pang of sympathy towards the girl. Something about her seems familiar……Lost in thought he feels Yuna grabbing his wrist and pulling him in the nearest empty classroom. She closes the door and locks it behind her. “We have about 30 minutes to ourselves.” She steps closer pushing him against the desk. “I’m in the mood……you look really hot today.”

Kook groans in frustration. “Well I’m not.” To be honest ever since he’s been messaging ’A’ he hasn’t been frustrated enough to fuck Yuna, or horny. Him and Yuna haven’t fucked in a week and he didn’t even care to notice.

Yuna scoffs not believing him for a second. “Yeah right….” She starts to undo his jacket and he grabs her wrist holding it firm.

“I’m not in the fucking mood.” He drops her wrist moving towards the door, but before he can exit she stops him. A look of determination on her face.

“What’s your deal?”

His deal? His deal is that he didn’t want to fuck her. Especially not in the empty classroom and most importantly not while he had someone else on his mind.

“I just said I’m not in the fucking mood. I have work today anyways so move.” Kook lied he’s off work today but he needed to get out of here. He waited for her to get out of his way and after what feels like eternity she finally moves with a frustrated sigh.

“What am I supposed to do now?”

“Don’t care figure it out.” With that Kook walks out leaving Yuna alone in the classroom. Once he’s in the hallways he scans the crowd hoping to find that girl from earlier. He didn’t get to formally apologize and he really did feel bad. She looked familiar. He must’ve seen her in one of his classes but he doesn’t know which one. He makes a mental note to apologize to her next time he sees her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the embarrassing encounter Anya had with Jeon she goes home. She thinks back at the way he looked up close. He’s eyes, his lip piercing, his eyebrow piercing, even his detailed tattoos. Sighing she walks into the kitchen to heat up a frozen dinner. As she rips off the plastic her phone dings. She looks at the notification and sees it’s from Kook. A small smile appears on her face as she opens the message.

He stops replying as Anya puts her food in the microwave. She waits for the three bubbles to pop up but they don’t. Before she could text him again her phone rings. It’s him. He’s calling her…

Her heart pounds, her palms are sweating, what does she do? Does she ignore him? What if he gets uninterested. She doesn’t want to lose his attention but-

“Hello?” He says on the other line. When did she even answer the phone? “You there?”

She clears her throat stilling her voice. “Hey yeah I’m here. I uh didn’t expect you to call.”

He was quiet for a moment. A long moment. Did he hang up? Did she sound like a man? Was he busy? Oh god this is so embarrassing. What does she even do in this situation?

Kook recognizes that voice. Didn’t he hear it today?………That girl! The one who bumped into him right? It had to be her. No it was her. They had the same quiver in their voice. Yes it’s her……and Kook didn’t expect for her to sound like…….home? He already gotten used to texting her and teasing her but he didn’t have a face or a voice to go off of this whole time. Now he does. He seen her in person. They go to the same school. She close to him, and she doesn’t even know it.

“Um Kook?”

He snaps out of his thoughts. He needs to keep his composure.

“You sound exactly how I thought you would.”

Anya blushes. God he’s doing something to her and she can’t get enough. “What does that supposed to mean exactly?”

Kook smiles at her sassy response. “Exactly what it means, it’s cute alright?” It was more than cute, but he didn’t want her to know that. Kook smiles back to their reaction from earlier today. The way she looked when she bumped into him. If he knew she was ‘A’ he would’ve paid more attention to her physical appearance. But all he could focus on at that time was her eyes…..those glossy beautiful eyes. He could’ve sworn he saw a whole galaxy in them. Was that cringey? He’s never cared this much about someone, let alone her eyes……He clears his throat pushing away those weird thoughts. As he was about to speak he hears beeping on the other line……is that a microwave?

“What are you eating?” Kook ask trying to change the topic.

“Oh I have a frozen meal in the microwave. Let me grab it real quick.”

He scoffs on the other line. Frozen meal? That’s all she’s eating? “You do know how unhealthy those are right? You’re killing yourself with those.”

“I can’t cook so these are always a good option.”

“You can’t live off those forever. You need home cooked meals.” Kook stated. Is she seriously eating nothing but instant noodles? Does she not have anyone in here life to cook for her? He wanted to know. He wanted to know everything about her and more, but he didn’t want to come off as desperate because he isn’t………yep definitely not desperate.

“Well if I cook I’ll burn my house down and I can’t have that-“

“I’ll cook for you.” Kook said out loud. Shit! He meant to say that in his head but his mouth moved faster. There’s no turning back now he might as well go with it.

“You can cook?” Anya asks.

“Obviously I can pretty much do everything and you eating packaged food is screaming “Kook please save me I’m completely helpless”. He grins. It was true. She obviously doesn’t have anyone to make sure she’s eating well, kook might as well do it.

“Wow you’re really ignorant you know that?”

“Hey don’t call me when you’re in the hospital for food poisoning or something because of all the processed food you eat.”

“Okay I won’t.”

Kook scoffs. She’s a stubborn one, but he doesn’t want to give up. He wants to crack those walls she has built up.

“What kind of fan doesn’t listen to their idol.”

Anya laughs on the other end. “My idol? You want me to bow down at your feet and submit to you or something?”

“Mmm submit to me huh….” Her saying that made a heat rush through him. He can imagine it. Her fully submitted to him and just him. Is it weird for him to be feeling this way for a girl he just met. Something about this situation makes him feel……..god something so different. He wants to know what it is and if she feels it too.

[miracles-and-butterflies]

Hello! Hope I'm doing this right :)

Sooooo about the Brooklyn 99 au................ I am very excited and wanted to ask if triplets and Alma (and Pedro) are in the picture too? And who is the new captain, is it who I think it is? 😀🫢

And is the precinct like Casita? Maybe it is a really old place and it creaks sometimes and it sounds like it's talking? And maybe the characters interpret the precinct 'talking' according to their needs (like, Mirabel or Dolores - to prove their point, or Camilo - to have an excuse to fool around)?

And do the Madrigals fall in the established characters (e.g. I suppose Camilo could be Peralta, Luisa or Isabela - Rosa and etc.)?

And how does Aaron look like?

And do you mind if I come up with a kind of a story with this au? I have an idea, and I think it would get richer once I hear your answers!

There is no right or wrong way to do it, don’t worry!

I love it when people send me tons to answer.

This is going to be a long one.

Alma, Julieta, Pepa and their husbands are in the picture too, yes. But serve as relatively background roles, I’m afraid - to fill the parental relationships that you see in B99. They’ve been split, so each of them does parent one of their respective “kids”. There is an exception to this, however, as Pedro, Antonio and Bruno (we’ll come back to him) aren’t related to any of the “kids” at all and are their own characters.

Alma is Bruno’s mother

Julieta is Luisa and Mirabel’s mother

Agustín is Isabela’s father

Pepa is Camilo’s mother

Félix is Dolores’ father

However, they all keep elements of both their canon parents.

E.g.

Mirabel’s design is inspired by Agustín - very classy and formal in her dress.

But yes, Bruno (who keeps the surname Madrigal) is going to be their new captain.

~~~

The precinct is how you see it in the show. Modern building.

Casita, however, plays a role as the local bar in place of Shaw’s. Where it is in fact old and creaking. A theory is passed around that the place is haunted - though that is mainly to scare off firefighters, and occasionally Mirabel (Camilo likes winding her up)*. In saying that, there has been unexplained accounts of strange things happening.

The odd door might hit you if you get too riled up. The chairs always seem to be there to catch you. There’s a few tiles that seemingly clink to the music. Etc.

*To note - Mirabel was in a collapsing building as a child and she still gets freaked out over any building being potentially broken or unsafe.

~~~

They somewhat fall into established characters. Some more than others:

Camilo is Jake

Aaron is Charles

Osvaldo is Hitchcock

Rendon is Scully

Dolores is Amy (NOT romantically)

Isabela and Luisa both flick back and forth between being Rosa & Gina. Isa can’t do the more stoic and silent demeanour of Rosa, while Luisa isn’t quite as bold and verbally brutal as Gina.

Mirabel doesn’t really fit with any pre-established character, but is somehow the mother of the squad (in spite of literally being the youngest and having no authority). If you consider Terry being the father. So there’s that.

Bruno initially starts off a lot like Holt, but slowly becomes more of himself as time progresses and Camilo starts bringing out his more chaotic side.

~~~

Aaron was purely created for the purpose of giving Camilo his own Boyle.

I’ve been using this kid (from the Where Is Bruno Hiding? Book) as inspiration for his design:

~~~

I am absolutely honoured that you’ve taken such an interest in my AU. I’d love to hear more of your story idea first, if that’s alright.

It is still new and I haven’t done much for it yet myself, as this is the first ask I’ve received from it.

[ramonag-if]

You know, I wasn't even upset about the events of chapter 7, at first. Then I read all the posts here and was like...

You know?

Seriously, (as the MC) I could maybe forgive Salyra as a person in time. I've even felt bad at times responding with the more aggressive angry choices.

But Salyra coupled with her new family, particularly Danzor, (Rana is a child so we'll just be jealous of her and leave it at that.) she just becomes down right insufferable and I know exactly what it is.

It's the gaslighting. In this last chapter, that conversation the MC has with Salyra and Danzor, Rana did not need to be there. In fact, her being there made it more difficult to truly express how bitter, angry, and anxious my MC was. I wanted to needle Salyra. I wanted to check Danzor. But Rana being there like some sort of prop made things difficult.

I just don't think Salyra really understands how bad the MCs life in Salt Bay truly was. I'm convinced she used her divine command power to force Ahlf into taking the MC. Leaving a child with an emotionally unavailable man ( who they didn't even know) who couldn't love them barely even loved themselves. A whole village that despised them and heaps of verbal, emotional abuse and neglect.

My math is probably off, but the time the MC went to the festival and was nearly beaten to death, Salyra and Danzor were what celebrating Rana's birth?

When the MC tells Salyra,'You know nothing,' it's the truth. She hasn't even really asked. She's just like, meet these new people I built a happier life with without you.

Speaking with Danzor is worse because he all but says he condones her actions.

Woe is Salyra, who abandoned a five year old. Woe is Salyra, who really struggled these many years. It was so hard for Salyra.

But what about the MC? Their being forced into the dynamic where they come off as the bad guy!

Sorry for the rant. I really do love this story. You've created a magnificent world, and I think even the people who despise Danzor now have to recognize a character you've just introduced has had such a profound effect on us already. It really speaks to your outstanding prowess as a great writer. I can't wait for May to be over so that I can join your Patreon. I'm afraid of these side stories rumors, though...

Those aggressive choices do border on the harsher side at times, but when you're angry, sometimes you just have to let it out 😂

Salyra really doesn't know what the MC went through on account of Ahlf not being completely honest in his letters to her. He kept the MC's life vague and Salyra somewhat deluded herself into believing that the MC had a normal-ish childhood without her.

You are right, during the festival, Rana was born in the same year 😅

Danzor is Salyra's number one supporter, so he'll never concede to her flaws and poor decisions from the past or going forward.

Thank you so much for your support and being so kind! I try to make each character as realistic as possible, especially with their flaws and actions, so I'm glad Danzor is being received with some enthusiasm (no matter how bad 😅).

[balis77]

Gonna do a hot take here: A lot of people, in-universe and out, are forgetting how much of a victim Eri herself is here. 

Like, looking at all her actions and dialogue so far, it’s becoming clear that even though she was aware enough of Prospera’s manipulations to try and save Suletta from them, she’s just as under her mother’s hold as her sister is/was. Look at her dialogue in Cradle Planet.

That last one in particular is pretty sad to me. Someone else’s curse. That’s what she basically considers herself. The fate of being Prospera’s tool to avenge both her husband and her daughter’s death. That’s her role, she’s accepted it because, as a Permet-bound consciousness, she doesn’t have any other option. It’s quite literally illegal for her to exist. And making it worse is actually looking at everything else.

Prospera couldn’t hear Eri until she got to Permet Score 8. She certainly knew Eri was there, but there’s no indication anyone other than Suletta could have even somewhat communicated with her all that time. She only became a Gundam when she was 8. Aerial is a child who spent 17 years hearing only about how she’ll be part of her mother’s revenge. A child who spent 17 years being effectively half-intentionally groomed into becoming a weapon. Sure, Prospera wants her to “be free”, but one, we’ve already seen how hollow her definition of “free” is when it comes to Suletta, and two, that doesn’t account for the fact Eri herself has been spending all that time effectively being an audience for all of Prospera’s revenge plans, being convinced over and over again that they needed to avenge what happened during the Vanadis incident. Her whole current body as Aerial was practically created to do so. It doesn’t matter if she doesn’t even want it; she doesn’t have a choice. She was literally made to help her mother do this. Her own feelings don’t matter; she has to meet her mother’s expectations, especially after how hard said mother has been working on it.

And now, we reach the most recent episode. Where she basically forces Suletta away so she doesn’t get involved in the terror attack Prospera causes. Where she effectively kick-starts a complete massacre of innocents just because its part of her mom’s plan. Suletta recognizes it; for all of Prospera’s statements about “freeing Eri”, Eri doesn’t have a choice in it. She can only try and make sure the one person she cares about is out of the crossfire. After all, who is she to deny her mother that she owes everything to the revenge she’s been working towards all these years. Prospera needs her, she can’t just let her down.

She got the mindset the same way Suletta did; being raised by a master manipulator like Prospera. Even if it wasn’t intentional on her part for Eri, Prospera had the same effect on both her daughters. 

And for all of Prospera’s bullshit about doing this for Eri, she still can’t really hear her daughter’s voice. This is her revenge, not theirs.

[mayamarvil]

Maybe this is a bit of a strange take but I don't really see anything wrong with Talia's parenting style. Like I know it's not good, but if we were to look at it from a different perspective that took into account cultural differences, then yeah, it makes sense for Talia to be hard on Damian.

Honestly it just looked like a more intense version of having immigrant parents. And as child of immigrants when I was reading it I was like, "Yeah, within the context of them being in an assassin murder cult and Talia being a woman, it makes sense for Talia to do all this."

So it all like starts when Talia's young and living it up. Everything is great, she's a princess, she's wealthy beyond belief, she has access to almost any resource possible, she's probably one of the best female fighters of her time. Like things are really looking good for Talia.

But in the back of her mind she has this inkling that no matter what she does she'll always just be second in command to her immortal father. But it's fine right? Because it will only be a matter of time before either Ra's dies or he realizes that Talia is a worthy heir. So Talia holds on to that belief no matter how much something in the back of her mind says that she'll always just be second in command.

But then all of a sudden Talia meets this guy, and he's different. He has these strange ideas of what a good world looks like, of how things should be done. And it's all very different from what Talia knows, from what she grew up with. But he's kind, he doesn't undermine Talia's skills and see's her as an equal. And he's so confident that he can change the world, together, with Talia. So she can't really help but to fall in love with this dude. And the best part is her father likes him.

So she and this dude end up in a whirlwind romance, and it's amazing. It's everything Talia's ever wanted. Because finally Talia has a chance to prove herself, sure she'll need his dude to help her get to where she wants to be, but she'll get there, and he'll make sure he helps Talia achieve her goals. And they're happy together, Talia's pregnant, they'll start a family together, and they'll change the world together.

When Talia tells him the good news, he's happy too, but then he says that Talia has to leave everything behind, everything she knows is wrong and none of it has any place in the new life they'll create together. And suddenly Talia realizes two things, that she must always be the one to push aside their desires and wants for the wants and desires of some man, and that she's tired of always being second.

But Talia has something, something small and growing, something that won't have to be second their whole life. That whatever Talia was never able to achieve, that whatever freedom Talia was never able to get, she'll make sure this small, growing child gets it. She'll make sure this child gets everything they ever want. So she says a small lie to protect this small growing child, because this child will be her legacy.

So Talia raises the child in secret, gives it every resource to become the best, raises it with a strict hand so he'll never falter or stumble, so he'll never accept anything less than first place. But as the boy grows Talia realizes that there is so much life in the boy, that his eyes spark with the same light it used to when Talia was young and in love. And Talia comes to the realization that this child would never be a continuation of her failed legacy, no this child should be free to forge his own legacy without being shackled to a dream that isn't his own.

So Talia lets the boy go to the only man she knows is kind, will see him as an equal, that will show him how a person can change the world. It hurts her to let the boy go, to let her legacy go across the ocean. But there is comfort in knowing that she raised the boy to accept nothing but the best, that the boy will never fumble of falter to achieve whatever he wants, because as much as the boy is his father's son, he is also her's.