#she has to say about trans men
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Was that first glance truly a gay little moment between Mizu and Akemi, or was she actually surprised (maybe even a little jealous?) that femininity could even look like that? Lavish, spoiled, seemingly loved or at least, something to be desired. I think it's pretty sure that she does not grasp how Akemi's life is a prison just as much as hers. That much is clear in their dialogues and her behavior towards her.
What if that dialogue (you, magical forest creature spoiling your good chances at a good life etc etc) was actually lowkey jealousy? of a life she herself would never get to experience as a woman? of being allowed to be a woman AND have a chance at happiness?
#am I crazy?#I don't think Mizu is transmasc#they made it pretty specific in that 'I had to be' answer when she was asked if she WANTED to be a man#(and I'm saying this as a trans person so put down the guns before you reply to this please)#and she likely has a bunch of trauma from her ''mother'' forcing her to grow up as a boy instead of a girl#wondering what her life could've looked like otherwise#I think that resentment towards her blue eyes and white father isn't only about death and grief and all that it could also be#because of how she was stripped of her identity as a girl-woman from day 1 to stay ALIVE#we'll see in the 2nd season probably#someone said in London it'll probably be the first time she's seen as japanese#and I'd go as far as saying#the first time they may not even treat her as a man too#with how often asian men are feminized and disrespected in general around that time period...#Blue Eye Samurai#Mizu BES#Mizu Blue Eye Samurai
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its past midnight and time to yap about Mouthwashing. Anyway obviously we don't see the Specific Events only how the characters react but with Anya... Okay I'm going to talk about the Sexual Assault not with Specific Details but that's what the post is about so
Anyways she reads to me as very like... trying to downplay the severity to herself. Like thinking through it (not having the exact quotes but) I feel like it'd be an unfortunately natural reaction- if you were stuck with 4 guys and the guy with the second highest position on the ship assaulted you depending on the situation. I feel like its not hard to imagine you'd try and reframe it as Less Bad to cope because let me be honest if I had to confront the implications of that, mainly the fact he could do it again and I wouldn't have any real way of dealing with it without complicating things even further bc he doesn't just have a close relationship with the guy with the Most Power on the ship, he also is in charge of keeping Me and The Other People On The Ship Safe, i would be in deep denial just to not lose my god damn mind like thats so fucking scary. And then the implication you tried to talk to the captain and even if he wasn't cruel he didn't Understand the Severity of what you were suggesting is like. Besides feeling afraid it could genuinely really fuck with my own perception bc like "if this guy who I trust says he's not a bad person maybe I'm just overreacting?" is. Again unfortunately understandable.
And again I'll say that Anya fully breaks down when the news breaks that pony express is fucked and like. 1. I think that's related to her own finances (and also. Literally just realized the way an abortion could interact badly with "no savings" like I Just Processed that fact. Like I knew "oh if she couldn't abort having to support a child wouldn't just be traumatic but also fucking nightmarish finance wise" but even having an abortion could make things so much harder.) 2. Jimmy LASHES OUT at Curly OPENLY. again based on my interpretation of Mildly In Denial To Cope this would. Like. Really fuck with that because it goes from "I trust the captain and I don't want to be afraid of my crewmate for a year" to "oh he is willing to verbally abuse the captain, who is his friend" and realizing I wasn't overreacting.
I also wanna point to the dead pixel conversation and obv it's symbolic but idk if it's meant as "there's a dead pixel that Anya noticed and she's using the topic to like test the waters" or if it's "anya is literally just trying to figure out Curly's thought process" which isn't like super important but like. Focusing on the way she starts the conversation by saying that she "Likes the illusion the screen has". (I don't remember the exact words sorry) But that's really interesting to me bc obviously you can read into Curly not seeing the dead pixel and instead focusing on the bigger picture (and how the dead pixel "doesn't ruin the illusion") but I think it's really interesting that Anya starts by talking Positively about the screen even though the dead pixel is there (and she can't stop thinking about it)
Like thinking through implications option 1: she's talking about the screen and uses the dead pixel to get a feel for how Curly responds to her bringing up issues
2: she's being entirely metaphorical and still trying to sort of self soothe- seeking external validation that the dead pixel Isn't Actually That Big A Deal (and therefore she's just overthinking)
3: idk how to phrase this exactly but ppl have talked Abt the way she talks to Jimmy, how it indicates a sort of "Fawn" response where she tries to keep him calm with compliments and stuff, and her talking about "enjoying the illusion" is her trying to do something similar with Curly- essentially starting the metaphor by downplaying the issue
Anyway. I don't know if I have a full conclusion but another thing is I think ppl need to acknowledge that while Curly fucked up and harmed Anya (mainly thru inaction). He's not uniquely shitty. Most people will be in a situation where they act similarly, and that DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS. I AM NOT SAYING CURLY IS ANY BETTER. I am saying that you need to be able to recognize your capacity for harm thru inaction and understand that like. He's not uniquely terrible he's just Normal Levels Of Unhelpful, which in a situation like Anya's is Dangerous
Like. Basically you can say "fuck jimmy fuck curly" all you want but you need to be able to understand that everyone including yourself has the same capacity for harm
#Mouthwashing spoilers#Rape ment#SA ment#Ask to tag#Idk I will say with the Anya thing: I'm a little bit speaking from personal experience#Of. There are things that I think about like ''ppl say These Things (that I experienced) are Very Bad but I don't think that's the case#For me'' like. Not consciously ''oh I'm over reacting'' but more ''well maybe my situation is different'' and it's really hard to figure ou#How much of that is genuinely the case and how much is denial y'know. 👍#Also Curly is a trans guy to me bc I'm hungry for characters who are trans men and just as culpable of willful ignorance and harm#As cis men. Anyway if anyone has a diff take on Anya's situation and)or mindset I'm open to hear it this is just my thoughts#Based on how the scenes read to me.#Also like the situation is delicate and this isn't like A Perfect Fix but genuinely Curly should've given Anya the gun#I don't think she would've shot it but it works as a Defensive Threat in a way that would give her security and also deter jimmy from being#A fucking problem because he doesn't experience consequences for his actions due to a mix of Captain's Friend and#''we can't really do shit to him or we lose our co-pilot'' (even tho he fucking sucks at his job they don't learn that until he#Is The Captain so they likely assume he's at least fucking. Functional and they would be worse off with him out of commission. Y'know)#But then again Jimmy's allergic to responsibility and consequences to the point of murder suicide so maybe Anya wouldve had to shoot him#Idk. Imagine me pacing full of rage. Imagining a universe where Anya can just fucking go to med school and doesn't have to deal with#The pony express. FUCK THE PONY EXPRESS
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watching one piece with your father is so humbling because one moment you’re monologuing to him about how incredible Arlong Park is and next thing you know he’s looking at you with a poker face and goes “you just want to marry Nami.” Like okay dad yeah fair but like, THATS BESIDES THE POINT
#chia’s life#one piece#nami#nami one piece#both my parents still can’t believe I am bi#by which I mean they keep asking me whether I’m sure I like men#I came out when I was 11 except my parents always knew I was gay and they just couldn’t imagine me with a man#don’t know what that says about me#also my mother has the most bullshittily good gaydar#one time she he/him-ed this one friend of mine and I was like mom they’re a girl#then next year he came out as trans#and my mom was like he just… felt like a guy#again idk what that says about her but it’s the truth#wlw
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Lightcannon and arcane tumblr rate my Zaun family interactions now
#lightcannon#vi arcane#jinx arcane#good silco#silco arcane#dad silco#vi and silco#jinx and vi#jinx and silco#zaun family#thats just gonna be the tag i use til i find a real one for them :sob:#I firmly believe jinx would call silco homophobic about stupid shit while she says incredibly homophobic shit on the regular accidentally#'kinda fucking gay you like kissing men and shit. pussy scare you or smth' she says while drinking a juice box on her trans father's desk +#at 9am with just boxers and a tank top on.#she's only accidentally homophobic because she has no fucking filter and doesn't rethink fucking anything#also aroace jinx but just because i think this should be canon
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god i hate everyone
#who thought it would be cute to immediately start ribbing me about how hairy and bald and ugly im gonna be when i go on t#one. im taking minoxidil. two. i wanna be hairy. and three. im not transitioning to attract you guys im transitioning to attract other trans#people! other trans guys find it hot come on!#like ok so dads brother is out here rn right#so first mom tells me hes gonna ask me questions about being trans. ok fine.#second she starts going on about how i had to be emotionally vulnerable with like 3 different therapists for this. whatever.#then when i start participating in the conversation she immediately asks “so how are you feeling about losing all your hair”#THEN she has the audacity to say to my uncle “yeah its sort of a gamble hes either gonna end up hairy like the italian side or fairly#baby smooth like yall“ when she fucking KNOWS that im dysphoric about my lack of body hair#and this happens every time! and its out of nowhere constantly!#all the while the cis men in the room are fucking bullying me with all this toxic masculinity bullshit!#sometimes i just wish i had never come out is all im saying#kept this a secret until i became an adult yknow. yeah i would have to do everything myself but it wouldn't be like this#just because i told you that you could call me a fag doesnt mean youre suddenly allowed to do microagressions constantly#shes tickled to fucking death with calling my future bottom growth my “teenie weenie” what the fuck! what the fuck!!!#and meanwhile every time i try to say words or make a joke my dad and grandpa jump on the fucking opportunity to correct me! or cut me off!#sorry im fucking exhausted i barely slept at all the night before last and got i think maybe 7 hours of sleep at most last night#and i just got out of therapy which always wears me out
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Do you enjoy t4t eiffera headcanons because I just think they have t4t vibes
oh, i feel SO guilty for this one... i've actually been trying to write a post about why eiffel/hera as a cis guy/trans woman relationship resonates with me... like, the things that make hera read as trans to me are canonically things eiffel does not experience and is often kinda ignorant about. a big part of their relationship development relies on eiffel learning to decenter his own perspective and recognize that certain things will impact hera more profoundly because of who she is. eiffel reads as especially cis to me in a way that not many characters do, and part of it is... it's not that his backstory, lack of self-awareness, or various other faults could only belong to a cis guy, but those things would read very differently if they were written with any other intent. in eiffel's pop culture worldview, he conceptualizes himself as the everyman, the 'default' person, and i think there's something very intentional that's being deconstructed, with that context.
that said, though: i know how personal trans headcanons can be, and if you resonate with eiffel in that way, i think that's wonderful.
#i'm sorry!! thank you for asking. i'm just not the right person for this one unfortunately#like part of what makes hera read as trans to me is that she has to constantly be aware of all these things#re: presentation and physicality and safety and identity and navigating relationships etc.#that eiffel kinda gets to take for granted.#the lack of understanding people have for hera's circumstances that is so often. not at all malicious. but just ignorant oversight#because they don't share her experiences and never thought to consider what certain things might be like for her.#like i think. canonically a lot of the work that has to be done in their relationship. is the kind of stuff#that people are hoping to /avoid/ by being t4t#and i don't say that as a slight against eiffel or anything because obviously i love him. and in a way it's kind of an outlet for me#because i am attracted to cis men but i won't pretend there aren't like. anxieties i have about that. anyway#i will elaborate if i ever actually get around to writing that post#asks
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i think everyone on sunnytwt needs to be sat down so i can explain to them what basic human empathy is. and then maybe i put them in a blender until they agree to write meta about the characters instead of whether or not charlie day got facial reconstruction surgery.
#ada speaks#u do not exist in a vacuum and your words have the capability to harm others#celebrities may not see your tweets but your balding transmasc mutual and your follower who feels self conscious about her nose will#it is fucking bizarre the way these people conduct themselves online#really. really fucking weird man#and then you see them acting like ppl are 'defending rich white men'#instead of taking issue with the actual shit theyre saying#whether or not you think rcg has been 'under the knife' or not#a) how is this any of your business. you are not entitled to this info nor do you have a free pass to criticize someone's personal choice#b) ask yourself why you feel you need to critique alleged surgeries and how they stack up to imposed conventional beauty standards#c) you do not *own* them. you can have opinions on your own attraction to them but#a person getting plastic surgery or hair plugs or whatever is up to them. not you. if it helps to make them feel better then who cares.#just because it doesn't make them attractive to YOU doesn't mean its okay to point and laugh#if a trans guy got top surgery and it was 'botched' would you act like they were stupid for getting it in the first place?#if a trans woman decided she wanted to surgically shave her jaw would you shame her for that?#it's their body. it's not yours.#for the record i don't believe any of them have gotten work done but think its a stupid thing to speculate on regardless#ive watched family members go through plastic surgeries of varying success. ive seen them get botox and hair plugs and everything#normal everyday people do it and it's not always about vanity#it can be for gender reaffirming reasons (and yes this includes when cis people do it) to alleviate dysphoria#trying to point out alleged surgical alterations made is just. gross#not to mention that holy shit MOST of the shit ppl are saying is like. age. different hairstyles. different facial expressions.#maybe if these people actually watched the show theyd be able to see the gang in action instead of staring at pics like spot the difference
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irt to that heteronormative bg3 content I actually think the one that bothers me the most is karlach. there's so much het content for her, to the point I avoid her tag
#if you think she'd be cute with a specific guy at least trans his gender and make her a cute girl instead!#i have the most 'she would not say that' feelings about karlach#the butch woman barbarian who swears a lot gets flustered around a guy and wears sundresses now#the faggy guy gets with a petite woman and has a bazillion kids with her#it's awful#it's giving let women like men#let men be masculine#i see how it is
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today i had this Vivid memory flash through my mind of kissing my ex boyfriend (this was like 2018) and i felt so viscerally fucking revolted and I gotta say. it is truly impressive that I didn’t realise I’m a lesbian sooner than fucking half a year ago
#z talks#like the misidentifying as ace was Inevitable i think. that was due to repression that realising i didnt like men would not have fixed#(context: id’d as bi ace like. i wanna say 2016/17-2021/22 sometime and then went into ace and Questioning)#remember the time i really solidly settled on being aro because ‘romance has never not felt like a chore and putting on a facade’#babe no thats because your most recent and also singular long term relationship was with a Man#and thats the only one youre looking back on#its so funny how i dated a guy and it was so thoroughly Meh that i just didnt feel like pursuing anything romantic for a very long time#(A REACTION I HAD NOT HAD AFTER MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS WITH GIRLS)#And DIDN’T somehow consider that maybe I just Didn’t Like Guys#its nothing i grieve or feel sad about dw its honestly mostly funny to look back on#no wrongs were committed and i dont hold a grudge against the guy it was just me being confused and compheted#(…which is also a weird word to apply because at the time i identified and was out to my friends as a trans guy Binary.#This Was Also Wrong.)#was a weird time man. a truly weird time#anyway. all is well i have now been on 2 dates with a really cute girl and she gave me tulips <3#as part of a Care Delivery bc i had a Migraine and No Painkillers Or Snacks#get well flowers <333333#and now i dream of kissing her under the moonlight#With the uh. Hornetposting lately it May seem unlikely but yes I DO interact with real women! Romantically!#They coexist Wonderfully <3#Anyway. I’m gonna go to bed#Realising that im a lesbian solved all my identity problems including my fucking gender which is just fantastic#I am very happy and whenever I think of being a lesbian it grounds me to reality a little bit stronger and i go yeah. Yeah.
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okay i get it but i also think its important to acknowledge that there is a difference between knowing from an audience standpoint that a character should be queer VS it firmly being acknowledged verbally within the narrative as a solid aspect of that character's identity irrefutably
#this reminds me of keeley jones from ted lasso like i get it shes “always” been bisexual but its so hard to tell if the writer is being#sincere in their representation or not#people joke about queerness bc haha lol look a gay person or look hot super model slept with woman#in keeley's case it was literally a joke intended to shock rebecca like that is not confirmation that is a joke the writer is making#it needs to be said or expressed in a way that is outside of a throwaway haha gotcha joke#the doctor has been kissed by men and kissed men in moments of celebration and theyve been laughed off#hes made comments that the audience is SUPPOSED TO think are jokes. queer audiences just see past that and straight audiences dont#its important that it was not only said but talked about even if it was in passing. it wasnt a punchline or the set up for a joke#donna comments that a man is hot > the doctor agrees enthusiastically that the man was really hot >#they both acknowledge the doctors attraction to men and his openness about it > donna says it was always obvious#its not about creating his queerness its always been there its about finally being in a place to say it out loud#from a narrative standpoint you could say now he's the kind of person who talks openly about his attraction and feelings#from an audience standpoint i hope we can acknowledge that its bc they couldnt outright say he was bisexual/lesbian/queer/trans/nombinary#now they can#thats the difference i think#doctor who
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I have a feeling my mom is slowly falling down an alt right/radfem pipeline on tik tok and it's scaring me
#being ao casual about covid#acting like people arent fucking immunocompromised#acting like those people should just ''stay inside''#saying a bunch of fucking gender essentialist bull shit#the other day she described something as being ''so boy'' (the thing was ten minute power hour)#and she has told me several times ''i feel better about you having a woman doctor than a man doctor''#and i mean any kind of doctor. like a fucking orthodontist.#she acts like men are innately horrible people that are going to hurt every woman ever#and i count as a woman who is going to be hurt. because I'm a perisex AFAB person.#and when i bring up terf and rad fem shit she's always like ''yknow they have a point'' LIKE GIRL. THEY USE THAT SHIT TO ARGUE THAT I#SHOULDN'T EXIST AND AM A TERRIBLE GENDER TRAITOR.#OKAY. DO YOU GET IT.#every month she becomes more and more dead set on this ideology. it scares me that one day she'll stop supporting me being trans#and i know so many people have it worse with parents who were never supportive in the first place#but it's fucking terrifying to slowly watch your own parent parrot the same misinformation that used to subjugate and harm you#it's scary being uncertain of when your parent is just gonna turn against you#it's like watching someone rot in real time#someone who has control over your entire life#tw vent
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every day I have visions of transmasc Quark and transfemme Rom
#star trek: ds9#quark#rom#Quark who flaunts his misogyny like its a badge of honour both because Thats How Ferengi Men Are#but also because of internalized misogyny#growing up having to constantly prove himself as a Real Man#lashing out at Rom who is so much more feminine because in his head he's doing him a favour#Rom growing up not fitting in with boys but having an easier time with girls#having these longings he doesnt have the words for#getting married and having a child because thats the expectation#I dont think Rom would crack the shell until like. being with Leeta#looking longing at some of her outfits and watching her when she does her makeup#Leeta picks up on it before Rom ever says anything and is like 'hold my hand. lets get you estrogen.'#listen I have a lot of feelings about trans culture on Ferenginar#and how trans people would be viewed#I feel like its a thing thats not entirely acknowledged#but you get a lot of stories of women who 'dressed as men' for their entire lives#men who would go naked- or wear flashy feminine clothing from other worlds#whispers of people making up their own pronouns because I feel like the Ferengi language only has the two genders- male and female#I think its less a case of outright hateful transphobia and more a 'we are not going to acknowledge this and try to ignore it as a society'#I think a lot about trans Ferengi ok.
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pov your dad sends you an article about elliot page and says it’s a good read and you start crying 👍
#idk it’s like.#my mom constantly making excuses and being so quick to defend herself for misgendering people#the conversation we had the other day in which she called being trans a trend#meanwhile my dad reading articles about Elliot page and going out of his way to read about trans people#that time he picked up a book in a bookstore called like how to use the singluar they a guide for cis people or something#him being probably worse than my mom at not misgendering people but always apologizing and sounding sincere about it#my mom still being in denial about me being a lesbian#while he has accepted it fully to the point of being comfortable making a joke about it the other night#not a mean or homophobic joke just a lighthearted joke about me not liking men#I haven’t stopped thinking about that moment if only he knew how much that meant to me#my mom is the louder voice in the household and so a lot of the time I take the things she says and ascribe them to my parents collectively#but that’s not the case here#it makes me feel so warm#one day I’ll thank him for this#sometimes opal says stuff
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also re my second eldest sister her coming out as trans is really enlightening and i will never not think about this one time when i was watching rocky horror and she was like. i HATE this movie SO much and i was like okay elaborate and she was like well you see i just don't think... it's right..... for "men" ..... to dress like that....... like you can feel like a woman but do you have to make it so obvious to the rest of the world ? and this was a good 8 years ago but now i'm just like oh baby girl lmao
#the amount of repressed shit this girl would say out of NOWHERE god bless#or the one time she was like. i am a straight man obviously#and i was like uh huh sure we'll continue w that premise go on#and she was like. BUT. i think. i would like to be with a trans woman. who cares if she has a dick thats still a lady#and i was like correct right. yes.#and she proceeded to talk for like 15 minutes about why she wanted to date a trans woman i'm like. okay. well. right.#OR the time when me them and their ex were discussing gender and she was like#i'm a man. obviously (....) but i dont feel like A Man you know like gender is weird and fake and every man is a woman#and im just. okay. well. i do not think cis men feel that way beloved but i'm gonna let you carry on
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I'm interested in the fact that many of the cultural genders that historically have allowed a crossing from man-to-woman or woman-to-man, have still maintained boundaries on what the actions of man and woman are (that is, a woman-to-man goes through the actions of manhood as dictated within x culture, and vice versa), which includes modern-day-terminology heterosexuality
want to do a deep dive at some point into
genders that exist outside of or in conversation with man-or-woman (so perhaps fluid or situational, as well as full-time something else)
genders that exist alongside something we may call homo- or bisexuality
#i do know of some ofc but im also curious about people within the above more narrow structures#that defied/defy those notions culturally and/or create/d a new cultural gender paradigm#like how you'll see tales of this woman acts like a man so we accept her as a man and she has relationships with a woman#there's a certain permeability here of what we may call lesbianism and gender#what would it be to say this woman acts like a man so we accept her as a man and she has relationships with men#where have we perhaps not gone as deeply as we can because we're limited by current-day binaries of homo- and heterosexuality#im feeling a little clumsy with this language but it's all ive got atm#until i go deeper#gender stuff#queer stuff#will also call it:#trans stuff#gender history
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One day I will stop looking up triggering things on the internet I promise
#it was jkr this time folksssss#she has got so much louder and more vitriolic#I think my most unpopular opinion is that the whole ‘you should die’ and ‘violence upon ye’ stuff made things worse#not saying she deserved to have her views supported bc holy shit. even that first essay was full of inconsistencies and false info#plus it was pretty infantilising about ftm trans people#who I notice she rarely discusses#the whole thing was a mess but written prettily enough to appeal to some people but that is a topic that’s been covered#anyway my point is that I can see that a natural conclusion to seeing people baying for blood is to run in the other direction#and I just bet all the terms were rubbing their little terf hands together in glee#you know that post about cults and cult adjacent religions and churches?#the one that talked about how these people send new recruits to knock on doors to make them feel othered and alienated#and how that sets them up perfectly to put themselves in the position of protector and comforter etc#yeah I think about that in relation to terfs and jkr A Lot#of course jkr has a fuck ton of privileges due to the whole money thing#but she didn’t always have that and she is pretty clearly not worked through the trauma she’s experienced at the hands of men#so yeah#I may be wrong but I sure do wonder about it#also I hope this doesn’t come off as being a jkr apologist bc Ew.#whether or not it was avoidable doesn’t matter when the reality is that she’s consistently causing harm#having free will means that when you’re being a dick it’s your responsibility#and if it’s your responsibility then you need to work on that and make a genuine apology tour instead of digging your heels in#or blaming it entirely on your circumstances for that matter#if jkr were to get out of the terf cult now and cited the same reasons I think things got this bad she’d still have to make big steps#towards fixing what she broke and apologising for her behaviour#and also she would need to learn to be okay with not being forgiven by everyone#I doubt it’ll happen though. she’s in pretty feckin deep
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