#she had like. a purpose in the story.
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menstits · 1 year ago
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fontaines archon quest is probably the first time in genshin that replaying it gives you a new context of how furina acts like its crazy...watching my oomf play when i finished and seeing furina almost on the verge on a breakdown even on the first acts when most people thought she was just the typical chuniibyou ojousama in charge...crazy.
YEAH like... god it's really crazy especially with furina's initial approach at trying to be the archon like... What could have been her own way of doing it if the crowd hadn't immediately shot down her attempt at being genuine . Like how different that was from the way she had to act for the following 500 years... Man.🧍‍♂️
#asks#anonymous#they really have come a long way from the first few arcs#like. mondstadt was clearly a prelude and liyue was funny enough but neither of them was especially emotionally impactful#inazuma sucked ass beyond belief sorry.#sumeru was better to me like the deal with nahida and rukkhadevata was interesting and i liked dottore cameo and like#at least it felt like all the characters involved like. had a purpose and knew each other#because a lot of what bothered me about inazuma was also like how disjointed the cast felt and how superfluous like half of the cast was#like the resistance was so fucking pointless they didn't do anything and i didn't give a fuck about the random npc soldier either#while like... at least dunyarzad in sumeru was more interesting and they handled the theme of like...#terminal illness and chronic illness decently enough#in inazuma i legit wws like who the fuck is this again whenever teppei showed up and the story acted like we were supposed to know him#while like#I'm sooo glad that in fontaine they focused mainly on the playable cast and made them have interesting dynamics amongst each other#AND made them also like. all be present during furina's trial (except wrio and sigewinne i guess but like. that's fine. their deal IS that#they're a bit isolated from the outside world)#or i mean ig sigewinne did show up but she hsrdly said much#like sorry idk why both in inazuma and sumeru they tried to stick a random npc in there tyat we were supposed to get attached to for no#reason. instead of giving more development to the playable characters? and as i said i didn't even mine dunyarzad much because at least#she had like. a purpose in the story.#anyway sorry that i put my longer response in the tag instead of the actual post#ALSO. this gives me high hopes for snezhnaya. god please please be good I've been hyped about genshin russia since i got into the game#I'm not even thinking about natlan I'm scared it's gonna be racist again#anyway.#bye
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mayasaura · 7 months ago
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Hey, anyone else think it's super duper suspicious that the Reverend Parents kicked off their abominable baby scheme pretty much simultaneously to Gideon Nav, key to the Tomb, landing on the Ninth? Gideon's more than a year but less than two years older than Harrow. So give it nine months gestation, a few months for prep and planning, and Gideon's arrival lands at exactly the place on the timeline you'd look for an inciting event to the creche massacre
And like, the Revs didn't seem shocked when they heard Harrow had opened the Tomb. They listened solemnly to Gideon spill the beans and then quietly shuffled themselves off the mortal coil, intending to take their pint sized single-serving generation with them. As far as we know they never pressured Harrow to continue the Ninth, either. They checked to make sure she was a powerful necromancer, and that was it. It's almost like they'd been waiting for this.
It's just a hell of a lot of coincidences piling up. Makes me wonder what they knew, who they'd been talking to. How much didn't they tell Harrow?
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lilianade-comics · 3 months ago
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My brain gaslit me into believing that Valerie got her outfit upgrade in D-Stabilized because she was the only remotely acceptable thing about that episode, so imagine my surprise upon watching Flirting With Disaster again and Technus, Lord of Drip and Shipping Gray Ghost, shoots her with the drip-upgrade beam and she (and everyone else standing around her) doesn't even question it.
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roseworth · 5 months ago
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grabs you by the shoulders and screams alex's death WAS misogynistic!!!! comparing it to uncle ben's death doesnt change that!!!!!!! the intention was for it to be an uncle ben death but the execution of it made it misogynistic because it was cruel and unnecessary!!!!!!!!!!
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misersdream · 7 days ago
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fanart of the wolfey con perish cookie... cookie con perish
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was obsessed with this thing ever since it was slowly revealed on stream i had to draw it
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bonefall · 9 months ago
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So, your Clear Sky post is absolutely horrifying, but it was very needed, so thank you. What are your general thoughts on tackling his abuse for the AU? Like you've said, pretending he's a good guy is not the way to go, but are you planning on toning down *some* of the situations, just to give some of the cats a break? Clear Sky is a very realistic depiction of abusers, but that seems to come across even without victim number 25, yknow? I'm very curious about how you'd like to go about this.
My most recent big change was bringing Slash back into the fold, because I realized that it was actually a disservice to not address where DOTC's themes dip into Colonialism. It's a hard topic, and I'm still trying to work out the details, but I realized it was important.
With how BB!DOTC is such a MASSIVE overhaul, to properly address abuse and the ways it impacts you, ableism and its violence, and xenophobia broadly, a huge reworking of Slash belonged here too. He's one of the greatest examples of how badly WC demonizes non-Clanborn cats. I shouldn't dance around it.
That's what I need to do with Skystar.
MANY of his victims have happier endings than canon, though. Bumble is one of the most famous, bumped up into a major character and directly responsible for the formation of ThunderClan. Bright Storm is taking most of Gray Wing's roles. Birch and Alder are getting examined, with either a father who wants his kids back or Milkweed as the mate of Misty.
A lot of people will die because of him, even more will be hurt, but I see BB!DOTC as a story about victims and survivors.
Others might grab POVs here and there, but as a response to canon which I feel is Clear Sky's story told in many parts, I center this rewrite around Thunder Storm. The path of kindness he marches down, with love and with anger, and the people he helps.
So BB!Star Flower...
Previously I was playing her as ENTIRELY just manipulating Clear Sky. She was loyal to One Eye and trying to get at Skystar to bleed him dry for 8 lives to sacrifice; but connected to Thunderstar over recognizing him as a victim who deserves her idea of justice. So, she offers Thunderstar the final kill, so her father will be grateful to him and he'll get power AND the death of his abuser.
(When Thunderstar looks upon Skystar, pathetic and neutralized down to one life, he thinks about the collateral damage that will descend upon the forest if he accepts the deal. He decides that he has found the line between Justice and Justification. Of course he wants the power to make his enemies cower, protect his people, and eliminate Clear Sky so he never threatens them again; that's not the problem.
He can still do these things. He wouldn't NEED the power of a war god to do so.
But if One Eye returns, he will be endlessly hungry, ruthlessly dedicated to revenge, and set out to devour the whole forest. Everything would get worse, and even more people he loves would die. It's where his desire to destroy a monster would lead to him BECOMING one.)
Even on its face, it was previously missing an element. There's a step between "Starf decides to bring One Eye back" and "Starf offers Thunderstar the final kill" that was bare. This is the piece that was missing-- That she, herself, is trying to reach out to the only person who's ever really understood her.
But more importantly... I do feel this topic belongs here, in BB!DOTC. Abuse is a MAJOR theme. SKYSTAR is a monster already. He's harmed two wives in BB (Bright Storm and Falling Cry) and played toxic games with all three kits (Thunder Storm, Pale Sky, Tiger Sky).
And I'd avoid Star Flower being abused... why? Because it's uncomfortable to confront the pattern that Clear Sky displays? That in-canon, he tries to cut all his victims into the same ideal shape, from Storm to Thunder to Star Flower? ...it should be uncomfortable. Everything that I described in Clear Sky Is A Monster is rooted in the same desire for control, power, and punishment most abusive people share, he just happens to be a severe example.
Yes. That includes how he treats his child and romantic partners. The parallels that are drawn between Starf and Thunder are there because he wants power in the form of obedience. Starf replaces the son as a narrative award for his "growth" of not killing random people anymore for a while.
A cookie cutter is an effective tool because IT ONLY MAKES ONE SHAPE.
You know what's more uncomfortable? Reading canon!DOTC and seeing someone who hurt you reflected almost perfectly in the character the writers think did nothing wrong. Because of "good intentions" that were not there.
I will say though, just to be clear; I don't see a purpose in being more than PG-13 about serious topics for this project. I promise none of my intentions have changed. Nothing will be more graphic or gorey than canon WC-- just more intentional.
I'm keeping the sacrifice because it's dope. No one is taking this from me. Girl Moment: Killed her awful husband 8 times to count as 8 sacrifices and offered the last life to her buddy as a show of good will. How else do you make friends outside of high school
But I know now that Star Flower NEEDS to keep the canon fact she has very little agency, UNTIL that moment she snaps.
She's sacrificing one abuser to try and bring back a bigger, badder one, because in spite of everything, her father One Eye always made her feel safe. Even though he promised her off to Skystar, and expected her to be willing to die for him. She's followed every command, every order, past the death of his mortal vessel.
The first, and only, selfish choice she's ever made was in reaching out to Thunderstar to offer him the power of her father.
Thunderstar's Justice is a story about a Thunder Storm at the pinnacle of his arc, how the survivors of his Clan are settling into the new normal after the carnage of The First Battle, how Skystar's arrogance brings a violent god to the Forest... and the connection Thunderstar makes with the daughter of a monster.
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ef-1 · 10 months ago
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A day after Daniel fucks over Yuki, you post a photo of yourself wearing enchante,, you're not slick
Skinny white girl like Ricciardo? Ground breaking lol
it's so tragic how you're just gonna have to die mad about it 💋
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blaithnne · 4 months ago
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Anders has inordinate amounts of annoying little brother energy, which is ironic considering the main person you see that dynamic unfold with is his ex-wife.
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martyrbat · 1 year ago
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a female character isn't allowed to be a character that is also female. she isn't allowed her own agency and complex motives nor any deeper emotions without it being centered around the male cast around her or a child. even if she's not a mother, she remains one because she could always potentially become a mother or she is the ‘mom character’ to the men/children around her and her actions MUST reflect that. if they don't, she's labeled a selfish bitch. if she is an (actual) mother than that's all she is—she isnt allowed deeper characterization or discussion because thats all she'll ever be, that's all she was made to be. male characters are allowed to be fathers (lireral or in the sense of providing for the people around them) with deeper feelings but a mother? never a mother.
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uniquezombiedestiny · 11 months ago
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disease of the body, disease of the mind
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problemswithbooks · 5 months ago
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BNHA Ch. 429
So, I guess Toga is dead, and people are losing it.
I get why people liked her--she was actually queer, being pan/bisexual. She was representation for them and that's rare in shonen manga. But here's the thing--she was bad representation at best and insulting at worst. Nor do I think she was made queer because Hori really wanted to represent a queer girl. Himiko was always the author's poorly hidden fetish--she just was. She liked girls as much as boys because Hori wanted to draw a girl touching sexually on another girl. You can see this in how he draws her and Ochako in solo pics together.
I mean, people seem to understand this when it comes to Momo and her outfit being overly sexual or that both Himiko and Hagakure's Quirks either leave them naked or they have to be naked to use them. These are excuses to draw girls in a sexual manner. Himiko being into other girls is the same thing and that's the kindest interpretation.
Given how Himiko acts and her Quirk being heavily coded sexual desire, and therefore her use of it against someone unwilling being sexual assault, it could just being playing into harmful stereotypes of predatory gays.
As a queer person myself I just found Toga insulting. She was designed to be overly sexual and give the male author a female character that he could draw being suggestive with his other female characters. When he did flesh out her character, her backstory was eventually the trope/fear of straight people, that gay people will be so overcome with their lust that they end up sexually assaulting them.
In the end Ochako accepts this part of Toga and says she'll giver her blood forever, but as much as a lot of readers took that that as some deep lesbian confession, for me it really fell flat. Hori never really gave any of the main kids time to actually learn about their villain or show how that changed their minds toward them. Shoto only works because Touya is his brother (even though he admits he barely remembers him). But Ochako goes from not thinking of Toga at all pre-first war, to one thought about her during her speech, to suddenly caring about her so much she--given how Toga's quirk is coded, is willing to essentially fulfill Toga's kink for the rest of their lives.
It's weird and it comes out of nowhere. It's made even stranger because Toga doesn't actually change or show remorse for anything she did, which included personally hunting and murdering people before she joined the LOV. None of the death and destruction she is also partially responsible for is brought up either, something that Ochako was rightfully upset about during the first war when less people and property had been destroyed. Ochako just accepts everything about her suddenly and her past serious crimes are forgotten so they can cuddle and cry.
Am I shocked Toga died--a little. I didn't think Hori would have the guts to kill off a young girl character, especially one that he clearly got a lot of joy drawing in sexy poses. But at the same time, once he killed off Shigaraki and ended Touya's story with his slow death, I'm not surprised he went the same route with Toga.
This isn't Naruto--Hori isn't really kind to characters that do something wrong, especially if they don't try and change. Enji, Bakugo, Hawks, and Aoyama all sort of got punished for what they did. Enji is the worst off, being permanently crippled, missing an arm and burned everywhere. Bakugo's hand is damaged, his heart weaker, plus he feels bad that Izuku lost his Quirk so they can't compete the same way he wanted them to. Aoyama, despite doing way less wrong and even helping his class during the forest raid, still leaves school because he doesn't feel he earned being there yet. Hawks lost his Quirk and even though him running the HPSC could be seen as good for him, Hawks always wanted a break, but now he has one of the most time consuming and stressful jobs out there.
So, if this is what characters who actively did good things and even changed and fought to be better get, what would characters who never changed and never did anything positive for anyone but their friends/themselves get?
Before the last Arc started, when so many people said the LoV were 100% going to be redeemed I had doubts and always thought it wouldn't make sense with how the story presented redemption or treated other non-LoV villains in the past. That if the main LoV did get some happy ending where they were bffs with the main cast it would clash with how other characters had been treated.
That doesn't mean that I think how Shigaraki, Toga, and Touya ended up in the manga was well done. I think their endings fit far better then a last minute redemption would have, but at the same time you can feel how rushed everything has been since the end of the first war arc. Hori was done with this story months if not years ago, yet he was contractually obligated to finish it. Because of that I think he left out as much as possible. As much as I think he's written some pretty obsessive stuff, particularly towards women, I can't really fully blame him cutting corners or the story being shit at the end.
We know Manga authors, particularly those that work with Jump are treated like shit. That they suffer incredibly long hours at times not even getting to go home for days. We've gotten messages for Hori saying he's sick quite a few times. On top of that, weekly story telling is not a great way to tell a cohesive narrative. Ideas probably change week to week or at least month to month and you can't go back and change the last chapter no matter how much you need or want to. Then you remember he also gave a lot of ideas to the people who made the movies, which would also change his plans for how he wanted the main story to go.
The story is bad--it has been for a while, but I think a lot of people put their hopes on their favorite characters getting a happy ending, even when there were signs that probably wasn't going to be the case. I know how much it sucks when a character you love gets a shitty ending (Stain was my fav, but he got an absolute dogshit ending) but at least, knowing what I know about the industry I can't really blame Hori the way I see some other people doing. Criticize it, sure, but saying Hori hates his readers or is horrible writer isn't true. BNHA was popular for a reason--he's great with characters and the beginning of the story had some great pacing. We'll never know, but I wouldn't be surprised if BNHA could have been amazing if Hori had been treated better and the story hadn't needed a chapter every week.
If anything BNHA has taught me how much a story suffers when authors/artists are treated like crap and forced to work past burnout.
#bnha 429#bnha spoilers#bnha critical#bnha#idk i just feel bad for the guy#i think he's sexist as shit#but no one deserves to work under such bad conditions#and frankly idk how any weekly story turns out any good#especially when its gone on for so many years#like when you think about it the chapters aren't even real full chapters#they're like half or even a quarter of a chapter that you'd find in a book or monthly manga#of course you're your going to have an incoherent story when you write like that#I mean the only other thing written like that are some fanfictions#and those authors can and often do go back and edit things#heck I've seen some that go on hiatus with the specific purpose of overhauling the entire backlog of chapters to make it a better overall#and I think part of why BNHA is perhaps worse then other weekly shonen is because he had a lot he wanted to say#on top of trying to find things that kept him invested in a story he clearly was tired of writing#I mean Lady Nagnat is great example#he watched a movie and thought the female assassin character was cool and it got him excited to draw/write#so he shoehorned in this character that was really only there because she made the story more fun for him to write and draw for a while#like American comics aren't great either when it comes to consistency or coherent plots sometimes#but I do wonder if BNHA might have been better if Hori could have left a story bible and basic outlines of what his plans were#and then someone else could have worked on it instead#because he really didn't seem very into by the end of the first war arc#like I think he wished that had been the end#but it wasn't and he was really tired and burned out#and probably already working on fumes
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fragmentedblade · 6 months ago
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The "Dan Heng is Dan Feng" dogmatics annoy me a lot. It entirely brushes off one of the most interesting and prevalent questions posed by the game, incarnated by several characters and stories that give the question different hues with different potential answers, and a constant also in HI3, like a thread waving the two games together
#The question about what makes a person themselves is super interesting#Is it the memories? Is it personality? Is it body? Is it resemblance? What about narrative reiteration?#Bronya is not Silver Wolf but they're both HI3 Bronya but also they're not#Is March the same person she once was? What about the Trailblazer? Welt looks at Himeko and Silver Wolf and feels like drowning#but he is looking at nothing other than something eerily recognisable#Vidyadhara are reborn anew as if washed clean but Dan Heng's process was skewed. What does it mean to Dan Heng?#He has the body he has the moves he has the stern haughty air he has muddy memories he can't quite recall but something stays#Is he or is he not the same? Where does one end and the other start? Where do they overlap?#Does how others regard him influence whether he is or isn't Dan Feng?#Does the memories of others weight more than your own memories and will?#What does constitute a person? How is selfhood constructed? What are the ontological implications of all this?#If you respond to these questions one way in one context when it comes to one character‚ can you confidently reply the same thing#in a different context for a different character? If not‚ why? What does it say?#It's not a straight up answer. The question is what's interesting and it's what makes Dan Heng's story interesting#Seeing it dogmatically negated mainly for the purpose of a ship annoys me a lot#It is a constant in HSR but it's even more clear after playing HI3. This problematic about what constitute identify and selfhood#and whether or not they're the same thing is a constant there too. With Kiana‚ with Otto‚ with Kevin‚ with Fu Hua‚ with the simulations#of the Flame Chasers most notably with Mobius but in general with the continuation of their goals and feelings‚ Klein as human and as ELF‚#the iteration of consciences of the Herrschers‚ the puppets of the Herrscher of Domination‚ the influence of the Herrscher of Corruption‚#the many times characters are found in different universes being slightly different yet recognisable‚ the amount of times characters seem#to reiterate existences in different eras‚ echoing past selves with past faces yet different‚...#And usually it's not easy to respond to all of them with the same answer‚ which only opens more questions. It's extremely interesting#and it's obviously a topic Honkai as a game cares about a lot. But no. Nothing matters. Dan Heng *is* Dan Feng yes or yes no questions asked#No problematic. No questioning. No doubts. All usually because of a ship. That the drive. I don't know... I'm all for shipping#but I quite dislike when shipping gets so out of hand it crushes and brushes off good writing or core motifs in a text. It's... shabby#And it saddens me haha. Why do you even care about these characters and their dynamic if you're erasing core traits of them as characters?#Abfkabdkkd anyway...#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#But I had to vent a little. It annoys me a lot this kind of approach to analysis what can I say
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citylighten · 27 days ago
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i kept getting notifications of rohan misbehaving at school last night and it was so ooc because he has the practice makes perfect trait so he's ALWAYS focused and i find him whipping out his homework on his own, then these teachers call up Zoe accusing him of cheating and having rigged science projects??
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he's stayed doing his best but the staff hates him! idk! feels racist forreal :/
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trickerys-domain · 2 months ago
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I was tagged by @contrivedcoincidences6 to make my OCs this picrew!! Thank you for tagging me, I finally got it done lol!!!
Iseya Tabris: A headstrong and compassionate duelist/assassin rogue. Blunt, and sometimes vengeful, to those who show corruption, incompetence, or cross her; but endlessly kind to those in need. Absolutely did not want to get married, but always wore Nelaros's ring to honor his sacrifice and as a reminder (yes, I did full ass sacrifice a whole item spot for this in game the whole game). Iseya thought she would always sacrifice anything for her family and people, including her found family and her lover Alistair. She was prepared to die to stop the blight, and would have if not for Morrigan's offer.
*Hilariously I named my Warden years prior to the release of The Last Flight novel, but it really added a great element to her character.
Marian Hawke: A two-handy Reaver Purple Hawke who loves her family especially her sister. Even Gamlen grows on her after the death of her monther as she finally is worn down enough to see him better. Marian starts off as a confident sassy jokster who tries her best to make a new life, but as the years go on and she loses and lose and loses, her jokes become a coping mechanism. A mean streak also appears. By the end she's so tired and depressed that she doesn't even notice Anders pulling away from her. She spares and stands by him anyway because she needs this one thing to stay in her life.
*I just really like the default Hawke Names, I think they fit Hawke really well.
Shiren'ne Lavellen: A compassionate, kind, yet firm and decisive person, Shiren'ne prepared her whole life to become a worthy Keeper for her clan. Yet after she ends up with a new calling she takes it with stride, understanding her role in the world is now beyond just her people, but she always rebuffs being sent by Andraste and stands by her gods. Shiren'ne's favourite thing about the Inquisition was getting to know everyone and learn so much about other cultures and customs, and was always happy to share and demonstrate her Dalish culture (within reason). And although she had been so ready to be Keeper and she is Dalish to her core, after everything she knew she could never return and instead found a new quiet life with Cullen. Shiren'ne prefers slower ritual and practical magics and leans towards old nature and healing (I wish spirit healer had been a subclass), but is eager to learn about the fade, spirits, and the journey of ones soul after death, showing this by choosing vallaslin for Falon'Din.
*Took some research, but her name essentially means Voice of the Journey. She chose the name herself for her Valleslin ceremony as part of accepting and stepping into her role as First.
No pressure tag to @wolfwhisperertf, @the-nameless-nerd, and anyone else who wants to ❤️
#this took so much longer to than it should have and I wrote so much more than expected#pls see more info and fun fact in tags if interested#also Contrivedcoincedences6 you and I made such similar hawkes and inquisitors#i had to rewrite them so many times to not feel like I just straight copied you#love that tho#Iseya Tabris being named after a city elf warden hero of the previous blight only to then become the hero of the 4th blight#also using dubious magic to win the day because they both knew they would do anything to end it is so delicious#that really fell into my favour huh lol#also if what i read is correct its even funnier because Tabris means 'person who embodies the soul/ideal/personality of a previous person'#its just too good#My Hawke also genuinely kinda respects the Arishok and is bummed to fight him but greatfull he's being honorable about it#also she ends up super disappointed in Aveline for becoming what she wanted to fix#Bethany is with the wardens and while Hawke is glad she's alive she also know its not where Bethany wants to be and feels so guilty#Shiren'ne's post Inquisition feeling are very much Frodo about the shire after his journey#Her purpose and experience and soul are just so changed she can never truly go back no matter how much she may want to#The first time I played Inquisition my lavellen had mythal vallaslin and it fits the story really well#but when i went to do my world state replay for veilguard I decided to go Falon'Din instead as the Vallaslin called to me#it changed how I played my lavellen so much but in all the best ways I love how she is now#also her being essentially Ameridan's shadow is so poetic#dragon age ocs#dragon age
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yellow-dejavu · 11 months ago
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#dark netflix#eva's world#erit lux#apocalypse family#1888 gang#shitpost#memes#i posted this#even though eva's world is the one that received more attention there's still a bunch of things that they didn't show#i will never get over of Egon as a traveler#they show it one time and pretended that i didn't wanted to know everything about it#also all the characters that we never saw in their eva's world version#i'm gonna suposse that they all have bangs#s3 barely showed any interaction between the four and somehow I can't stop thinking about them#claudia was the leader and the only adult they have in their lives#jonas was everyone's favorite sad boy#the two of them learned sign language#elisabeth was the little one and she was adored by all of them#noah and his 1920s boy attitude was somehow the comedic relief of the group#they were like a sad sitcom and i'm sure they felt less sad because of elisabeth#claudia and elisabeth were the smart ones of the group#noah and jonas were smart too but they also were noah and jonas#they were like a family#i have no proof but no doubt either#poor agnes was born in the 1888 timeline and also had so little screen time#maybe baran and jantje realized that 1888 was the time period when magnus x franziska did something apart from loving each other#and inmediatley discarded the possibility of showing it because they went like “nope doing something onscreen defies their whole purpose”#i will always sound crazy talking about how beautiful Bartosz and Silja's love story is when they only have four scenes#this show had a weird 50something having to take care of a group of teenagers in the 19th & 20th century and decided not to elaborate on it#this show is so iconic
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juliareed · 4 months ago
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Fandom: Alias Relationships: Sark/Sydney Song: Spiracle by Flower Face Content warnings: Blood, death, violence, spiders, insects, flashing lights
#aliasedit#alias#sydney bristow#julian sark#sark x sydney#ssplus#fanvid#myedit#s/s dares to ask a question#what if your mother created a killing machine and that machine was obsessed with you BECAUSE it's your mother who made him.#like it's a part of his code your mother designed. or not code - but because he learned everything about the world by watching her.#like the only kind of humanity your mother allowed him - the only kind of humanity left after she was done with him - was this.#because it's the only kind of humanity she allowed to herself.#to not ever be completely sure if your mother ever loved you and then learn something like this?#what if your mother's killing machine grew up hearing stories about you.#what if your mother's killing machine looked up to you as a child and wanted to make your mother proud just like you did.#what if your mother's killing machine learned about your existence a full decade before the two of you met.#what if your mother's killing machine was conditioned to love you.#what if your mother on purpose designed her killing machine to be flawed. to have a weakness that shouldn't be there.#from her words all to protect you. and what if one day her plan backfired.#what if one day your mother's killing machine turned against your mother for you. turned against his creator for you.#what if your mother's secret plan worked A LITTLE BIT TOO WELL and she lost control over you both. what then. literally what then!!!!!!!#also i don't think we talk enough about that scene in conscious where in sydney's dream jack turns into sark's father.#what if i dreamed my father was your father. what if you said my mother was like your mother. what exactly does that make us.#and what if we also shared a name. what if a part of me - the part i feared the most - had your name.#while working on this realized also that i want a fic where every day for months sydney sees a ghost of someone sark killed.#it's always someone different. and at some point it starts to feel like it's never going to end.#the ghosts will be right there with her for the rest of her life. as always i just want#some sydney introspection and sydney grappling with the idea that her own mother turned a human being into THIS.#which goes along with facing the fact that it could have been her on his place.
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