#sharon’s is a joke obviously

[jubshead]

So we’re in agreement that this is canon… right?

[ultimate-shipper-trash-blog]

Together or Separate

Eddie is pissed.

He knew the risks, he did, he didn't care. The rewards were worth it.

Getting to hold Steve's hand, getting to love him. Who cares if his boyfriend gets flirted with from time to time and he can't do anything to stop it...no biggie...right?

Who cares if their waitress is laughing a little too loudly at a joke that certainly was not a joke. Who returned with their drinks with a button undone on her uniform. Who hasn't given Eddie the time of day and keeps leaning a little too closely to Steve...on their anniversary.

Steve slams on his foot the minute she turns back again.

"Bitch!" Eddie yelps.

"Sorry! What's going on with you? I've been calling your name and trying to get your attention-"

"At least somebody wants my attention."

"Oh is that what this is about? The waitress?" Steve rolls his eyes.

Eddie doesn't dignify that with a response. He huffs and digs a little more into his seat.

"Eds you know we can't do anything in public...you don't think I don't want to hold your hand across the table? To sit in a booth so I can wrap my arm around you?"

Eddie sits up a little more, "Steve I-"

"Alright gentleman!" The waitress interrupts. "Here's the check for the meal." She slides it closer to Steve, her phone number very obviously printed on it.

"You know, I forgot to ask, together or separate?" She flashes Eddie a forced smile.

A dark shadow passes across Eddie's face. They always have to pay separately. Stupid small town. Stupid Reagan. He was going to take advantage of this opportunity though.

"I guess we can pay together since the check is already here." Eddie reaches a hand into his pocket to search for his wallet. He's about to put the bills together when Steve let's out a girlish giggle.

Both Eddie and the waitress are staring at him in shock. Eddie's never heard that noise from him before.

"Steve? Are you-"

"Oh! Isn't he just dreamy?" Steve flutters his lashes at the waitress.

"...him?"

Eddie tries not to take offense to that.

"Steve, what are you doing?"

Steve's smile is evil. His eyes have a terrible sparkle to them. "Taking care of things dear."

The waitress jumps back in shock.

"We never get to go out anymore, he's so busy providing for me. It's so nice of him to pay for dinner isn't it?" Steve blows a kiss at Eddie and the waitress has gone pale.

"It's our anniversary you know? We can't normally advertise our relationship you know? Some people are awfully rude to us. You've been so sweet to us Sharon."

Oh so that's her name.

Eddie couldn't care less.

Steve turns his megawatt smile to him now. Not even giving Sharon another minute of his time.

"Of-of course. People can be so rude to such a lovely...couple. I'll be right back with your change."

"Keep it." Eddie says, standing from the table and walking over to Steve. "Ready to go sweetheart?" He holds out his elbow.

Steve grabs it and giggles as they leave.

"That was some risky move Stevie."

"I don't actually give a fuck." He leans his head on Eddie's shoulder as they walk home. He can feel Steve's smile pressed into his shirt. He finds he can't keep his own smile off his face.

"Happy anniversary."

----

I'm back bitches!

I wrote this on my lunch break:P

Kind of inspired by the date I went on where we paid separately and it ended on a nice note of friendship

[lucianalight]

Well, that episode was depressing. I'm so sad and heartbroken for Agatha and Alice and Teen.

The speed with which the coven tried to punish Agatha was disappointing. Like what did she even do to you? She helped Jen and Alice. The reason you all could survive the last two trials was her. And yet they failed her and they were ready to leave her behind when she was begging them not to. After they found out about her past no less.

I've talked about her similarities with Loki and his story before, but it's still surprising how much they are alike and treated alike. Vilified, scapegoated, misunderstood, blamed. I mean look at this

And the way she begs her coven who were about to fucking hurt her just moments ago, to not leave her because she can be good, broke my heart to pieces. Just like she was begging her first coven and her mother. Just like Loki who tried to be a good son to have his father's love.

The way both her and Loki didn't want to be alone. Like she didn't even try to defend herself when they were all threatening her with different kinds of punishments and just made a joke. But leaving her alone was the worst punishment wasn't it. And her losing control was the result of that. Just like when she couldn't control her power when her family tried to execute her. She couldn't control it again because again her mother and her new coven hurt her.

And all the time the other witches were standing around uselessly either judging her or screaming at her to stop. Forgetting the trials were about facing their fears and they were NOT HELPING BY MAKING AGATHA'S FEARS COME TRUE INSTEAD OF HELPING HER THROUGH THEM LIKE SHE DID FOR THEM.

If it wasn't for Teen none of them would leave that trial alive. It was Nicholas' voice that made Agatha snap out of it. The voice of someone she knew who loved her.

And speaking of Teen he's certainly Billy isn't he. And obviously he doesn't need more power. And what Agatha told him, that he is a hypocrite just like his mother, make me think perhaps those theories that he killed Sharon are true. Didn't Agatha said "I didn't think you had it in you" and winked at Teen in that scene? And maybe she pretended she was possessed by Sharon to see his reaction? Wasn't this what she meant by implying Teen has killed for his agenda?

Also the way she changed from sad and honest, to spiteful and heartless because Teen hurt her and was being a hypocrite? JUST LIKE LOKI WHEN HE IS HURT😭

Anyway, this episode made me love Rio more. She's a true Agatha stan. And Alice deserved better :(

[gavillain]

My thoughts and theories after Agatha All Along episode 3. Read no further if you haven't seen the episode yet.

SHARON NOOOOOOO :'( Honestly, with the way Agatha brought her along essentially to be a meat shield, it's not surprising that she died so early on the journey down the Witches' Road, but I was still surprised that they killed off the comic relief this early. But I caught that they didn't add Sharon's hair to the antidote when brewing the potion, and I think that'll be discussed next episode. The show definitely had to establish the stakes of the Road as life or death early on, and Sharon was the only character who they COULD kill off since she was the only one without a mystery to solve. Still, sad to see her go.

In more important news, though, MEPHISTO GOT NAME DROPPED. HE'S COMING ASDFGHJKL; Listen, after all the speculation we were all doing during WandaVision about Mephisto showing up, to hear him get referenced makes me EXCITED to see if that's just going to be a world building detail or if he's going to be relevant in the story.

Agatha giving up her son, Nicholas Scratch, for the Darkhold was established as a part of her reputation in this episode. The trailers confirm that it's a bit more complicated than that, so I'm curious to know the full story. Right now, I'm theorizing that the hair in the locket is Nicholas's, and, if you remember from WandaVision, she plucked that locket off of her mother's corpse after stealing mommy's powers. So, I'm fairly certain Agatha sacrificing Nicholas is tied in with why her mother tried to have her executed back in the 1600s, and maybe Mama Harkness did something that resulted in her grandson's death? I dunno, but I wanna know! I think Nicholas Scratch IS still alive, though, and I think he's going to be the twist Big Bad of the show.

Teen is pretty obviously Billy Kaplan, and it's so obvious in fact that I wonder if it's going to be a bait and switch and he's somehow Nicholas? But like... maybe I'm overthinking it and it's only obvious that he's Billy to us comics fans. For normies watching this with only WandaVision and Multiverse of Madness for context, him being Billy WOULD be a really interesting twist, so we'll see! Regardless, he's the only person on the Road who I am reasonably certain is going to make it out alive.

The hallucinations for Lilia, Jennifer, and Alice were all interesting, though they left more questions than answers: *Lilia saw what looked like Russian royalty taunting her saying "they're all dead" as they took on more decayed and corpselike forms. I joked to my boyfriend that it was the Romanovs, but that's honestly not necessarily out of the question. Lilia in the comics is the "queen of the gypsies" in Scarlet Witch's childhood, so maybe in this verse, she was a part of the Sokovian royal family before their dynasty was killed off by revolutionaries that led to the political turmoil of Sokovia that we saw in Age of Ultron. Being a psychic, I'm willing to bet Lilia survived because she saw the massacre coming but no one else believed her, sort of a Cassandra figure. I could be WAY off base, but I like my theory.

*Jennifer is the one who I have the least read on her hallucination with the weird man trying to drown her. We know that she is bound, unable to use her powers, so is this man maybe the one who bound her? Or is he someone else tied to the events that led to her being bound? She's been bound for a little over a hundred years, and the man's clothes seemed to be from that time period. In the comics, she's from Florida and was an ally of Man-Thing, so maybe something in her story is going to tie back into Werewolf by Night? We'll have to see!

*Alice's hallucinations are the most straight forward, she saw her mother weeping because her grandmother had passed away and the mother felt it. We know her mom was a witch, and we can pretty safely assume that the grandmother was one too, I think. The mother mentions that since whatever killed the grandmother got her, now it's after her, and since we know Alice's mom is dead in the present day, that would mean that this mysterious force is now after Alice too. What is this force, though? Alice tells Teen that she has a tattoo that wards off a curse that plagues her family bloodline that her mother made her get, so is it just this curse that's after her or is it connected to something else? In the trailer, we see Alice exploding with fire as a demonic entity emerges from her. I doubt this is Mephisto, since I think if Mephisto has ties to anyone here, it'll be Teen or Rio, but maybe some subordinate of his? In the comics, she and Wanda worked together to defeat a being called Dark Tongji. I think it's likely that he's the being hunting her bloodline.

Then a few notes from earlier:

1. The Salem Seven - I went back to WandaVision for a refresher, and, not counting Agatha's mom, the coven that Agatha murders and drains of their magic in her backstory numbers at seven and they were in Salem... I'm putting money that the Salem Seven is what's left of Agatha's old coven hunting her down, or at least their descendants.

2. Rio keeps getting hints that keep lining up to hint that she's a genderbent version of Blackheart, which has me excited! I don't know if they're actually going to go this route, and her being a "Green Witch" kinda makes it a bit weird. But they keep reiterating "black heart" in relation to her and now they've referenced Mephisto, his father. So I think if Rio isn't literally Blackheart, she's at least possessed by him. We'll have to see. But I do love the crackship of Agatha Harkness/genderbent Blackheart for lesbian Marvel villain lovers. That tickles me XD

Overall, SUPER into this show thus far, and I LOVE that there's so much mystery and intrigue to piece together! I CAN'T WAIT FOR EPISODE FOUR, I NEED IT NOOWWWWWWWWWW

[minisitod123]

HEADCANON: ABACELSUS AND SLARON OR SHAYER

My headcanon is that both Slayer and Aba tend to argue often, slayer because he loves to bother aba, but he doesn't do it in a bad way, he just likes to joke with her and aba doesn't like slayer at all, she often invites him to a rematch (which she obviously loses). While they argue among themselves, Paracelsus and Sharon sit down to drink tea and eat cookies while they chat quietly with each other.

Slayer and Paracelsus sometimes walk together for a while to chat about their past lives and the our wives. slayer would be happy to see the process of his friend and paracelsus, although at first he would be embarrassed to remember their first meeting, he would not feel resentment towards him, on the contrary, he would be happy to form a friendship with him. If paracelsus were to become human, the slayer would teach him how to dance and dress elegantly, something paracelsus would have difficulty with. Aba becomes nervous imagining what slayer would do to her husband, but Sharon calms her down by inviting her to tea for the two of them.

Sharon and ABA would have a good time together, Aba would feel some envy of sharon's personality and appearance, she believes that she will not be a great wife like sharon. She realizes this and tells him that she doesn't need to be a "perfect woman" or a "perfect wife" for her husband to love her more. They would both chat about their husbands and even go shopping together (and Elphet too lol).

Here I imagine their dialogues:

Slayer: Seriously, of all people, why did you choose to be with that…thing?.

Aba: for your information, paracelsus IS NOT A THING, he is more than a key or axe, he is MY HUSBAND, MY MAN, the person who will always support me, my-

Slayer: the question was for paracelsus.😒

Sharon: And have you thought about when you will show her the surprise of your new body?.

Paracelsus: Not yet, I want her to feel super safe to be able to show-

Aba: PARACELSUS!!! I'm sorry dear, but I invited slayer to a rematch, so I need you right now ok?.

Paracelsus: hell aba, again?!.

-- Slayer: Come on paracelsus.

Paracelsus: no.

Slayer: what? but why not?!.

Paracelsus: I already told you, slayer, I am not like you, an "dandy vampire", just because I have this body now does not mean that I will become an "elegant husband and dancer".

Slayer: don't you want to impress your wife, paracelsus? If you wish, I can take the place of aba, so that I can guide you.

Paracelsus: what?.

--

Aba: I wish… I wish I were a perfect wife for paracelsus.

Sharon: Aba dear, you don't need to be a "perfect wife" or "perfect woman" for Paracelsus, and I've seen the love they have for each other. Do you know something? Paracelsus has changed a lot thanks to you Aba, you changed him and he changed you. They are perfect for each other darling.

Aba: d-da-darling?.

Sharon: oh *let out a little laugh* don't take it literally, it's just a way of saying affection, you're my new friend aba, well if you think it's okay for us to be friends.

Aba: a-friends?...well...that's.. sound nice, I wonder if elphet or testament mind that I'm with another friend?.

--

Aba: but dear!.

Paracelsus: aba, we already talked about this. We didn't come here to seek revenge, and I'm not going to fight alongside you against slayer, we're going to have a good meeting of friends, of husbands and wives, nothing more, so calm down please, okay dear?.

Aba: b-but...

Sharon: we already talked about this slayer, one more joke and you'll see.

Slayer: oh come on dear, you know I don't mean the jokes seriously.

Sharon: your jokes are very pointless, slayer, you know very well what Aba is like, so I don't want any more bad jokes.

Paracelsus: and fewer fights between the two

Slayer and aba: b-but..

Paracelsus and Sharon: *in a firm voice* YOU BOTH, APOLOGIZE RIGHT NOW!

Aba and Slayer: ........ *with disgust* sorry.

*and so, the 4 of them spent a nice afternoon drinking tea and eating cookies*

[southparkhcsocs]

I NEED WEDDING HCS WITH THE MAIN FOUR + BUTTERS 😭😭

Really fun writing this one! i thought i was gonna struggle

i hope you like it :3

Stan Marsh

Wants to help plan

live band please

didn't want to invite his dad

Sharon kinda made him although she understood

there would just be more problems if Randy wasn't invited

will cry as soon as he sees you

and I don't mean a single tear

i mean ugly sobbing

he's so lucky

can barely get through his vows

for the first time in years he gets that urge to vomit

thank-fucking-ly he doesn't throw up

his speech at the reception is sweet and short

mostly about how he's the luckiest guy in the world

3 tier chocolate

Kyle Broflovski

with you every step of the way

a lot of arguments about what flowers, colours, flavour of the cake

you'd both had to compromise

speechless, blushing mess when he see's you in your dress

like it's funny how red he's got

he stuttered when saying his vows and thinks he ruined the whole day

apologises so much

he made sure not to fuck up when "you may kiss" came along lemme tell you

Shelia shook

your dad shook

you 😏

dude knows how to use his tongue idk what to tell you

his speech was perfect, the right amount of sweet, funny and embarrassing

2 tier vanilla

Kenny McCormick

shocking not a shotgun wedding

doesn't get involved with planning

like so much so it's annoying

"but it's your day"

no fuck you Ken it's your day too!

will make sure the wedding location is completely safe

bro doesn't want to die on his wedding day

looks so fucking happy seeing you in your dress

like he's smug that he's locking you in

his vows are full of inside jokes and innuendos

same with his speech

with btw

almost missed the dinner because as soon as you both walked down the isle he was whispering all sorts of filthy things to you

but you don't want to mess up your hair and makeup

2 tier toffee sponge

Eric Cartman

SAID he's not going to help plan

but will dig at almost everything you chose

almost cancel the whole thing

why are you marrying him??

turns out the one thing you got right is your dress

because it wiped that damn smirk off his face when you came down the isle

he sooooo wanted to be angry

but how could he when you looked that beautiful

ofc he didn't write any vows

thought he'd just wing it

but shit, now he's all flustered!

he manages to spill out some crap about how lucky he is and how beautiful you are

and then he wouldn't stop

in his eyes it was just you and him and he gushed and gushed

until one of the guests cleared their throat

fuck never seen him redder

luckily he writ down his dinner speech

it was incredibly short and all about how you were the lucky one

4 tier red velvet

Leopold "Butters" Stotch

helps with the planning just right

but asks some stupid questions

wedding in Hawaii otherwise he's grounded

you obviously didn't want to invite his parents but they're his parents

his vows are sweet, about how he's devoted to you

trips a bit as you both walk down the isle

and really hope you're not mad at him because of it

and of course you're not

how could you be mad at him

his speech was pretty much the same as his vows

cupcake tower

[veliseraptor]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, please reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love.💛💛💛

ooh interesting interesting. I actually did this one not too long ago but I can do it again, with a different set of fics this time. these are pretty much all pulled from my Author's Favorites series on AO3

our love would live a half-life on the surface (MDZS/CQL)

Possibly I'd rate this one as the most fucked up xuexiao I've written; definitely it's the most fucked up ostensible fix-it fic. and like! I did fix it! sort of! some things anyway!

It was really fun to write because of how deeply it's set in Xue Yang's POV, and the fun of trying to convey what's going on outside of his blinkered and undeniably skewed understanding of the world. I also had a lot of fun balancing between the genuinely fucked up nature of what Xue Yang is doing throughout this fic and his genuine desire to make things better and just completely failing to understand how to go about doing that.

“Why’s it matter?” Xue Yang snapped. “It doesn’t. Or it doesn’t need to. So you killed some people. So what? I get you’re upset about it right now - obviously - but it’s not like you need to be. They weren’t anyone important.” “Everyone is important,” Xiao Xingchen said. “Bullshit,” Xue Yang said firmly. “Most people aren’t. Why do they matter so much to you anyway? It’s not like you knew them. Most of them,” he amended, before Xiao Xingchen could bring up fucking Zichen. “So just - forget about it.” Xiao Xingchen made a faint sound at the back of his throat. “Is there anything human in you at all,” he said, and Xue Yang sank his teeth into his cheek, the taste of blood spreading across his tongue. He yanked the bandage the rest of the way off. “Probably not,” he said hoarsely, and started cleaning the blood off Xiao Xingchen’s face where it’d gotten smeared all over his cheeks and around his eyes. Gently. He didn’t want to actually hurt him.

what little girls are made of (MCU)

I went back and forth on a few different MCU fics but decided on this one because it gets a little less love than a lot of them and I'm deeply fond of it. I love Natasha dearly and one of the things I love about her is the potential for how weird she can be. And also I'm always on a campaign to give her more female friends.

“Is that how you usually make friends?” she asked. Natasha cocked her head to the side like she was thinking. “I made one of them by pretending to be someone else so she’d hire me,” she said. “That’s different.” It sounded like a joke. Sharon suspected it was also serious. “Then there’s Maria – I was a hundred-ten pounds of pissed off at the world when I met her. The other ones…one I met through an alien invasion and one was trying to kill me. Then there’s Wilson – I did knock on his door first.” Sharon stared at her. Romanoff smiled, a little – still sharp but maybe a little brittle. “I don’t really do usual, Agent Carter.”

Ground Zero (MDZS/CQL)

I wrote this one in an afternoon and I'm happy enough with it that I've never written another version, which is kind of saying something. I'll often circle around pivotal events in a characters' life and write a few different versions of them, and the finger-crushening is so central to Xue Yang's story that I might've done the same, but I ended up satisfied enough with this version to pretty much leave it alone as my Definitive Account (more or less).

I think what I was trying to convey here on a visceral level was the horror and the pain of that experience, which I think sometimes gets minimized into "just lost a finger." And the surrounding circumstances that shape and define Xue Yang's understanding of the world going forward because of it.

“What’s one more dead beggar?” A sigh. “If I cut off the hand there’s good odds he’ll bleed to death. If I don’t there’s good odds it’ll go foul and he’ll die in a week. What do you want?” Don’t take my hand, he thought dazedly. Don’t. Please don’t. “Start with the finger,” said the other voice. “Then we’ll see.” “Fine, fine.” Xue Yang could feel his breathing coming faster. He opened his eyes just long enough to see the man weighing a butcher’s knife, then slammed them closed again, heart pounding in his stomach. He screamed when the man touched what was left of his little finger, pulling it away from the others. Thrashed, reflexively, trying to get away. “Hold still, you little cur,” the man said harshly, and the knife went through easy like it’d gone easy into Xiao Hu when the bodyguard had stabbed him for cutting a gentry purse. Honestly, he barely even felt the cut itself.

The Sad Heart of Ruth (A Song of Ice and Fire)

An old fic but I'm still happy with it! Which isn't always the case. Throwback to a fandom I haven't written for in years but a relationship I still have a lot of feelings about. A serious outlier, in terms of my ships, but one I'm inexplicably fond of nonetheless.

And yeah, me writing about grief again. I'm always writing about grief.

It was small things she remembered. The warmth he radiated when they lay in bed together. The way his forehead crinkled when he was thinking hard about something. The strange, shy, hesitant (naïve) joy she’d felt on their wedding day. The way he’d cried into her shoulder when he’d heard of his brother’s deaths. “The King in the North is dead,” the Blackfish said, his face like carved stone. “Oh,” she said.

The Season of Grace Coming Out of the Void (Black Jewels Trilogy)

Another throwback to an old fandom that's kind of an eternal fandom in some ways; I'm very proud of this brief snippet of an AU. I think it came out well and (surprisingly) concise for what it is; it could've gotten very elaborate but I think it's stronger as the short piece that I left it.

He’d had them back a week when Daemon turned up in his study halfway through the night and announced casually, “If you do anything to Lucivar, I’ll kill you.” Saetan set down his pen and looked at his namesake. He expected to see anger, or suspicion. He found nothing. Just blank gold eyes looking placidly back at him. A shiver crawled down his spine. Saetan nodded once. “Understood,” he said. Daemon ghosted back out the door. Saetan stared after him, and wondered if he was supposed to be happy that his boys were talking to each other.

passing this one on to @ameliarating, @brawlite, @mostfacinorous, @maester-of-spreadsheets, and @feralkwe!

[sashaisready]

The Blood Pact: Chapter 6 - Trust me, you will

Bucky Barnes Vampire AU x Female Reader

Reeling from a bad break-up, you're desperately trying to find a new place to live but the Brooklyn rental market is a complete nightmare. You take a chance on an intriguing newspaper ad and enquire about a room in a shared house, where you'd be living with two mysterious men. The catch is that they want something other than your money for you to pay the rent...the one thing they don't have

Series Masterlist

Chapter 7

Hello! Warnings in this chapter for: Peter being a dick, Bucky being a dick, Steve being oblivious, maybe some slight noncon as reader has been drinking - but she's an enthusiastic participant. Also reader feeling insecure and some hints at slut/sexuality shaming.

“So what happened to Sharon?” You asked Peter as the two of you walked down the street towards your house. “Normally she’s stuck to you like a barnacle on a boat”.

He grimaced slightly. “We…uh. Had a fight. So she left early”.

“Ah. I see” you replied, feeling a small surge of satisfaction. “Something you can work out I’m sure?”

“Mmm. Probably. But she wasn’t happy” he said quietly, shoving his hands in his pockets. He always did that when he was uncomfortable.

“What did you do, Quill?” You asked. 

“Well. It was about you, actually”.

“Me??”

“Try not to be so gleeful about it”.

“Peter, please. I’m not gleeful”.

A lie.

“Just tell me”.

“Well,” he started, clearly uncomfortable to be sharing this (which you loved). “I told her that I thought you were looking really good tonight. And she flipped out, saying I wasn’t over you”.

You nodded, covering your mouth and pretending to cough so he didn’t see your smile. “I see. Well I’m flattered, but yeah as a general rule it’s best not to tell your girlfriend that you think other women look good” you told him gently.

“Yeah. I’ve learnt that one now”.

You both laughed for a moment and for a brief second it was like old times again, before it all got so ugly. 

“So are you seeing anyone right now?” He asked, clearly trying to appear casual and make small talk but very obviously fishing for information.

You winced. “Uh…no. Not really”.

Peter laughed. “Well I know that face. Who is he?”

You rolled your eyes, knowing him well enough to understand he wouldn’t let this go. So you gave it up for an easier life. 

“Just a guy. I liked him. I thought he liked me too. But he basically told me we couldn’t be together, and made me feel stupid for thinking he saw me in that way” you said quietly. 

You were surprised you’d told him anything. But actually it was nice to share it with someone even vaguely, it wasn’t like you could talk about this with anyone else.

Peter nodded and let out a low whistle. “Well, that really sucks”.

“It does indeed”.

“But let’s be real here” he continued. “Clearly he’s a deeply stupid man if he doesn’t see you that way. His loss entirely”.

Your mouth formed a tiny ‘o’ of surprise, you were caught off guard by his words. He hadn’t said anything that nice to you in years.

“Huh…wow. Thanks Peter” you responded sincerely. “I appreciate it”.

You walked the rest of the way just chatting and making silly jokes. It was weirdly comforting to be back in his presence, like slipping on an old, comfortable sweater you’d had for years. 

You finally approached the house and stopped by the front door.

“Well, this is me. Thanks for walking me back, Peter. I appreciate it”.

He looked up at the house and whistled admiringly. “Wow, quite a place you’ve got here”.

“Yeah. A little nicer than that first apartment we got together, you remember that one?” You giggled. 

“Oh yeah. But that wasn’t our apartment. That was actually the cockroaches’ apartment. We were subletting from them” he beamed. 

You cracked up. “Fuck, don’t remind me…”

You both laughed for a moment when you found yourself locking eyes. Before you knew it he had pushed you against the wall and was kissing you. You let him. Maybe it was partly the booze. Maybe because he was that old, comfy sweater after all. You needed a bit of comfort lately. 

The kiss was nice. Familiar, well worn. A little sloppy. Not a patch on Bucky’s kiss, but Bucky’s no longer mattered. 

Unbeknownst to you the security camera whirred above your heads, observing unseen as you became reacquainted with your former boyfriend. It watched you for a few seconds before flipping back to its original place.

You pulled away. 

“Peter we can’t do this. It’s not fair on Sharon…” you protested as you pushed him away from you.

“Don’t worry about Sharon…” he said softly as he tried to dive back in, his hands finding your hips. “Maybe she was right, maybe I’m not over you…”

You nearly relented again. He just felt so…warm. So solid. So familiar. 

“Why don’t you take me inside and I’ll show you how much I’ve missed you?” he whispered in your ear. 

“No. Stop” you said firmly, realising the drink had left you woozy and vulnerable. You weren’t thinking straight. “You can’t do to her what you did to me. It’s not fair, Peter”.

He rolled his eyes. “Really? You’re still not over that?”

You glared back at him, aghast. Suddenly that old familiar sweater was full of moth-eaten holes and loose stitches. Why wear that old, threadbare garment when there are so many better sweaters in the world?! 

“No. Funnily enough I’m not over my long term boyfriend cheating on me in a bathroom…that I walked in on…during my friend’s party I had brought him to as my guest”. 

Peter rolled his eyes. “Oh whatever. You’re such a fuckin’ drama queen. Always have been. No wonder your new man doesn’t want to deal with your bullshit. Peace out” he scoffed and gave you a patronising wave before heading in the opposite direction.

You screamed an obscenity after him as he went. Not your finest hour, but it felt good in the moment.

You took a moment to laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of it all before gathering yourself and your keys and heading into the house. You took a few deep breaths trying to keep your anger at bay, firing off a text to Wanda to let her know you were home safe and you urgently needed a debrief tomorrow. What the hell were you thinking letting Peter worm his way back in like that?? Hadn’t you learnt your lesson yet? You were an idiot.

As you stumbled inside you were planning to just grab some water and go straight to bed. But of course your nocturnal roommates were at their usual spot at the kitchen table. Great. Just what you needed right now - small talk.

“Hey you, how was your night?” Steve asked cheerily. 

Bucky was next to him but said nothing, just sat stonily watching you. Not creepy at all. 

“Yeah it was fun, thanks” you managed to respond more merrily than you really felt, before downing a glass of water at the sink. “Looking forward to my bed though”. 

“Surprised you’re going up there alone” Bucky spat.

You flinched, shocked he’d even spoken to you at all - let alone with that tone. Steve looked similarly puzzled as you both turned to look at Bucky.

“Excuse me?” You asked dubiously.

“I said I’m surprised you’re going to bed by yourself” he said again, unperturbed.

“Yeah I heard you the first time” you shot back. “But what exactly are you implying?”

Bucky sat back in his chair. “I saw you. On the security monitor, when you got back to the house”.

You felt yourself flush slightly as you realised he’d seen your kiss with Peter. 

“And? I don’t see how that’s any of your business” you exclaimed. 

“It’s not. I’m just checking you’re looking after yourself, after all we have a vested interest if you’re being careless and your blood is at risk as a result” he replied nonchalantly.

Your eyes widened and you silently raged at his implication. 

“Wait, what is…” asked Steve, completely lost.

“I’m not being careless” you spat back. “Last time I checked there was nothing in our contract about who I’m fucking, and not that I need to justify anything to you - but I’m not ignorant - I know what contraception is”.

Realisation dawned on Steve who shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “Oh…”

Bucky scowled, but he nodded. “Good. As long as we’re clear”.

“Crystal” you muttered back sarcastically. “Now can I go to bed or do you need to issue me an STD test?”

Bucky just ignored you as you stomped off upstairs, you wished Steve a good night and swayed slightly as you felt the effects of your overindulgence. Once safely in your room you kicked your shoes off and pulled off your dress, stripping down to just your bra and underwear. 

You laid down on your bed for a moment and pulled a pillow to your mouth, letting the softness absorb a short scream of frustration as you pushed it against your face. Between Peter and Bucky you were officially Done. You’d truly had enough of men who berated you and made you feel small. Enough was enough. 

You got up and crossed the room to go take your make up off when you someone knocked on your door. You rolled your eyes, men really gave you no peace at the moment. You assumed it was Steve coming to check you were alright after yet another run in with the world’s worst roommate.

You stomped over and flung it open, surprised to find Bucky standing there. He opened his mouth to speak but a look of surprise came over his face as his wide eyes tore down your torso. You blinked in confusion for a short second before realising what was happening.

You were only wearing your underwear.

The heady mix of drink and anger meant you’d completely forgotten that you’d already stripped off when you’d heard the knocking.

You yelped and went to cover yourself as Bucky covered his eyes and spun around, apologising profusely as you swore and pulled your long nightshirt over your head to preserve your modesty.

“Why did you answer the door??” he choked out as you pulled the shirt down over your panties.

“I forgot! Give a break” you huffed. “Okay, you can turn around now…”

Bucky turned back to you, keeping his eyes on the floor. “I didn’t really see…” he said awkwardly.

“Don’t…” you warned, a finger pointed in his face. “What do you want anyway? Here to check I’m not hiding any men under my bed?”

“No…look. Can I come in?”

You reluctantly sighed and gestured him step into the room. You sank down onto the bed as he closed the door. You were very aware he hadn’t been in here since that night he told you nothing could happen between the both of you. You wondered if he was thinking about that, too.

He shuffled awkwardly on the spot and it was probably the first time you’d seen him anywhere close to flustered. Normally he was collected, stoic even. Impossible to read.

“What I said back there…it was unnecessary and rude, and I’m sorry. It was uncalled for. You’re right, it’s none of my business” he told you. “I know I haven’t exactly treated you very kindly recently. I’ve been really shitty to you, and I want to tell you I’m sorry”.

You blinked, surprised at the admission. He watched you carefully, his eyes never leaving yours. He looked sincere, actually remorseful. In spite of everything, you felt that familiar tingle of desire as you looked back at him.

“Oh…thanks” you responded. “Wow, that’s actually…very mature of you. Did you have a personality transplant while I was out?”

He frowned. “Help me out, I’m trying here…”

You held up your hands. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I appreciate you acknowledging it and apologising. It means a lot”.

He nodded. There was a beat of silence as you stared at each other, not sure what to say next. It had been awkward and uncomfortable between you for some time now, it was as if you’d both forgotten how to exist alongside each other without some sort of uneasy tension hanging over you.

“So, who was he?” Bucky asked.

You rolled your eyes. “Ugh. Nobody. My ex, I had a momentary lapse of judgement. Mainly alcohol fuelled” you sighed.

“Your ex who cheated on you?” Bucky replied, suddenly very interested.

“The very same. And please, I don’t want to hear any shit about it. My threshold is at capacity”.

Bucky shook his head. “I’m not going to give you shit” he said firmly.

You inhaled. “Apparently I never really learn. You’d think I’d have it through my thick skull by now. I can only seem to hook the terrible ones. I guess that’s all I’m good for” you laughed half-heartedly.

You weren’t really sure where that came from, or why you told Bucky, you were just feeling a little…down. The drink and run in with Peter had zapped a big chunk of your confidence.

“Don’t talk about yourself like that” Bucky scolded.

You were taken aback by that. Normally he would take any opportunity to torture you. At least…he used to. You didn’t really know what to say.

The silence was thick in the air as you thought about how to respond.

“So you don’t think I’m a drama queen?” you croaked, your voice small. Peter’s earlier words echoing in your ears.

Bucky furrowed his brows his confusion. “Uh…no? Why would you think that?”

You shrugged. “It’s nothing. Something someone said to me tonight. Ignore me…I’m just feeling a bit low”.

Bucky watched you carefully. He seemed concerned. You supposed he’d only ever seen you fiery and sniping at him, he didn’t know what to do with this version of you. After what seemed like a lifetime, he finally spoke.

“You know you’re…uh….gorgeous, right?” he told you softly. “That you could have any man you wanted?”

“Don’t make fun of me, Bucky” you replied, your voice small as you assumed he was playing one of his pranks. You couldn’t handle his cruelty at the moment.

“I’m not!” he spat. “Don’t play dumb.”

You gawped up at him, then looked back down in your lap. It felt like he was luring you into another of his mean tricks.

Bucky suddenly seemed to understand you weren’t playing, his face morphing into concern. He crossed the room and slowly kneeled in front of you. He placed an ice cold finger under your chin and propped your head up to look at him. Your eyes slowly travelled up from the floor to meet his. You felt exposed under the intensity of his gaze, your breathing getting heavier as he moved a strand of your hair away from your face.

“I mean it, Doll” he told you with rare sincerity. “I wish you could see what I see”.

You just stared back at him open mouthed, too shocked by this 180 flip to form any words.

“You drive me crazy. You know that?” he said gently. “When I saw you in that dress earlier…and then with that guy…I just lost it…don’t even get me started on seeing you undressed…”

You practically squeaked, unable to take it all in. He tenderly slid his fingers into your hair, never dropping his gaze.

“B-but I don’t get it. I thought I was nothing special, and you didn’t want anything to do with me…you’ve basically ignored me for weeks…” you stammered.

Bucky shook his head and sighed regretfully. “It’s because you’re something special that I said that. I’m sorry that I hurt you, Doll. I just thought it would be easier to be around you if I kept my distance, maybe pushing you away would mean my feelings for you would fade. I know I’ve been an ass, but I would never want to take advantage of you. Even at the start, that’s why I gave you a hard time – I couldn’t deal with how you made me feel. I know that’s not an excuse.”.

You blinked back at him, the gravity of his confession slowly sinking in. You thought about how he’d toyed with you, how he’d berated you. You thought about all of it with fresh eyes through this new lens. What Steve meant that time in the kitchen. All of this time, he had felt it too. He felt what you felt.

His finger traced along your cheek, moving down to your jawline. His touch was almost hypnotic, you had no words.

“I’m sorry that I made you doubt yourself in any way. You deserve better than that” he whispered.

“So…you do like me?” you asked him shyly.

He sighed again. “I do. I can’t deny it any longer. But it’s wrong, Doll. This wasn’t meant to happen. The whole thing is fucked up, even Steve saw what was happening and warned me to stop. But I can’t stay away from you. I can’t-”

You cut him off as you flung yourself at him, buoyed by your Dutch courage and unable to resist any longer. You pushed him to the floor, straddling him as your mouth found his and you kissed him deeply. He didn’t hesitate to respond, his urgent hands pulling you closer towards him as you grinded your hips into his. He flipped you over so that he was suddenly on top, causing you to shriek in surprise. Now in control he effortlessly lifted you onto the bed without breaking the kiss, pulling the sheets back with one hand as he held you with the other. You never got used to how easily he and Steve could lift you. He placed you delicately down on the bed and broke away from you, caressing your face with his thumb.

“We can’t right now” he whispered, his breathing slightly laboured. “Steve will get suspicious because I’ve been in here for so long. And you need to sleep it off”.

You whined petulantly and shot up. “You’re leaving??”

He nodded.

You scoffed in disbelief, trying to ignore the throbbing between your legs. “You can’t leave now? After all that?!”

He grinned deviously and suddenly he was back to the Bucky you knew all too well.

“I can and I will. Get some sleep. Sober up. I’m not going anywhere, we’ll continue this tomorrow. We need to talk. Remember Steve is out meeting some of our friends so we’ll have the place to ourselves. We’re in no rush, Doll. I’m going to take my time with you”.

You scowled at him, outraged that he’d built you up just to leave you hanging. But he was right, Steve had plans tomorrow – you remembered now. He’d been excited all week. Maybe it would be better to do this, whatever this was, without any potential interruptions.

But still…

“Maybe I won’t to want to by then…” you whimpered childishly.

Bucky just laughed, leaning in closer so that he was only an inch away from your face. “Oh Doll, trust me – you will” he practically purred, his voice low and gravelly.

He smirked as he watched you flush at that, knowing full well how riled up you were. He placed a finger against your cheek, letting out a small groan as he marvelled at the warmth radiating against his frigid flesh. As a parting gift, he leaned over and languidly licked a long stripe up your neck to your jawline, causing your entire body to shiver.

You gawked at him with betrayal in your eyes, wild with lust. Hardly able to believe he was leaving you in this…condition.

“Until tomorrow” he whispered, shooting one final smirk at you as he slipped out of the room.

You furiously threw a pillow at the door where he’d been, it slammed with a neat thud as it bounced off the wood. You growled with frustration and threw yourself back onto the bed, wrapping the sheets over yourself and turning over onto your side as you flicked off the light. That bastard, how the hell were you supposed to get any sleep now?! This was a great injustice, a terrible crime.

You laid there in the dark thinking about everything he’d said, trying to absorb the weight of what he’d told you. You were still reeling from his confession, unable to grasp that this whole time he’d been grappling with his own feelings for you. Part of you felt annoyed that he’d played games with you like this, keeping you at arm’s length on his terms – but you also understood why. This wasn’t exactly an ideal situation, it wasn’t appropriate – clearly he was hoping his attraction to you would fade and life in the house could remain simple. You couldn’t deny you had your own reservations too, unsure how it would work and how the dynamic would change. You didn’t like the idea of keeping anything from Steve either, he’d been so good to you. You supposed you could always move out and end the arrangement…but the thought of starting the apartment hunting again filled you with dread.

But mainly you felt…well, excited. There had been something between you and Bucky since the start, something that had crept out in his feeds and generally caused you to provoke one another in your day to day (well…night to night) interactions. Some sort of raw chemistry neither of you could ignore. You couldn’t fully articulate what it was, but it thrilled you – all you could really focus on was your anticipation to explore it, and worry about the consequences later.

[sebastianstansqueen]

Lost In The Shadows: Part Nine

/N: Hey guys, been through a lot for a bit, start giving me Ideas for what type of series you want to see next, i'm curious and finished writing this one so lets see if I can start getting parts out more frequently, If you want to be Tagged, either send an ask or comment on this or click on Taglist open.

Wordcount: 2,414

Warnings: slight angst, Sharon, and fluff, if I forgot anything let me know please!

Masterlist // Series Masterlist // Taglist open// 

Tags: @cherryblossomsky - - @babylooneytoonz - @wonderlandfandomkingdom - @miraclesoflove - @amelia-song-pond - @leyannrae - @avengerlex - @pineprincess - @nik2write - @dorothea-hwldr - @rosie-posie08 - @scxrletrecsmarvel - @sebsgirl71479- @missvelvetsstuff - @hadesownhell - @casa-boiardi - @winterslove1917- @hallecarey1 - @ash-craze - @barnesxstan - @unaxv - @bethexo07 - @itsmytimetoodream - @sebastians-love -

Y/n wiggled around the kitchen as she worked on making breakfast, she was no expert when it came to food, but she was trying. She had music playing kinda loud but not so loud that Bucky would hear from the master bedroom. She was trying multitasking on pancakes, eggs, and bacon, her current least favorite of the three was the bacon with grease popping up, freaking her out every so often. So as she moved about listening to the music while making sure the food didn’t burn, she missed Bucky’s initial entrance. “You know how to cook?” He joked tilting his head, with a little laugh, Y/n hadn’t heard his morning voice before but she liked it.

She laughed along with him.“Sort of. I’m trying, and possibly failing.” She looked at the food, removing the pancake that just finished cooking. 

Bucky moved across the room standing near her grabbing one of her cooked pieces of bacon and eating it. “A little over cooked but whatever.” He shrugged off. 

“Blame it for that, the oil kept on popping out at me!” She blamed, soon begging to laugh at her fake whining.

Bucky laughed with her. “When’s your next day off?” He leaned against the counter looking at her as she finished up the food. 

“Sort of whenever I want, but I got to go in today.” She explained as she began dishing up food for both of them. “Why?”

“Well, since we’ve gotten back, I’ve had time to finish my car, and I wanna take you on a drive.” He smiled up at her. Y/n nodded along, liking the idea of it, they sat at the table, continuing to talk for a bit, until Y/n got up to go get ready for work. 

Bucky had been in the middle of working out when Steve texted him. ‘I’m having a barbecue tonight, around six, do you want to come?’ 

Bucky obviously wanted to go, he hadn’t seen Steve since before the wedding, which had been a while ago. Bucky was an instant replay, while Y/n was usually so busy it sometimes took hours to get a reply, and he didn’t want to call because it probably wasn’t important enough. He sighed, deciding to just try and call her, and if she didn’t answer he’d completely understood. The phone rang for a moment, it took a moment for her to pick up but soon her voice rang out through the speaker. “Bucky?”

“Hey, sorry for calling, but um my friend Steve is having a barbecue today around six, I want to go, but I wanted to see if you did too.” He explained in a rush, even though their relationship had gotten better, Y/n still was very much the same when it came to work. 

Y/n’s eyes widened not expecting the sudden invitation, she turned to look through a two way mirror where she could see one of Rumlow’s guys, that Andy had found dealing something on her territory, completely covered in his own blood if he was gonna keep siglent Y/n wouldn’t take it easy. She looked down at the clothes she’d chosen for that day, her white shirt was possibly completely destroyed but it didn’t matter she was going to be burnt later that day, she looked at the time, three hours till it started. “Uh, Yeah I’ll be home soon.” They said bye before ending the call. Y/n walked back into the room where two of her men stood on either side of Rumlows guy. “You two finish this up, if he doesn't talk, by two, chop him up and throw him in the hudson.” She ordered, before marching out of the dimly lit building. 

Y/n made her way out to The SUV, she began texting Andy telling him she’d get her car tomorrow, updating him about Rumlows guy, and explaining she was leaving early, which seemed to have shocked Andy, because his caller ID had popped up. “When do you ever leave early of your free will?” He asked with exaggerated shock, right after Y/n put him on speaker.

“Relax, Bucky’s friend is having a barbecue, he wants me to go, and I need to get cleaned up, before.” She explained shortly, well yes it was that, but she was secretly happy to spend more time with Bucky, she typed away at her phone getting something sorted for later.

“You don’t seem like the type to go to a barbecue, the last however long I’ve known you not once have I ever heard a word about a barbecue till now.” He began teasing her.

She rolled her eyes with a playful smile tugging at her lips. “I’ll talk to you later. Go check on the guys at the warehouse later.” 

“Okay, talk to you tomorrow bye.” He said into the phone before ending the call. 

When Y/n got home, she immediately made her way up to the shower in her bedroom, she used a light purple loofa to help wash away the blood and other grime that might have gotten on her, as she did so soon the bathroom doors opened and her eyes widened, connecting with blue ones. “Sorry!” Bucky said immediately, walking out and closing the door. 

Y/n laughed lightly before calling out. “Bucky, it’s okay, just grab what you need.” There was so much fog around the glass of the shower that she probably looked like a human shaped blob on the other side. 

“When did you get home?” Bucky asked as he opened the door and quickly went to grab a few things. 

“Not that long ago, I needed some time to get ready, work was dirty today.” She shrugged while saying it, continuing to scrub, Bucky made a sound of understanding, before he left.

She wrapped herself in a towel, moving into the bedroom, she found a box sitting neatly on the made bed, she opened it finding exactly what she had expected. Most of her clothes weren’t for being out in the heat for too long, usually she’d be switching from air conditioned building to air conditioned building, being outside wasn’t something she didn’t usually do, save for when she had gone on vacation with Bucky. She pulled out the outfit, first pulling out the plain white shirt, followed by light pink shorts, and lastly white tennis shoes, she blow dried and straightened her hair, before applying some make up. 

Bucky felt still slightly embarrassed after walking into the bathroom while Y/n was showering, as his brain continued to fester on his embarrassment he heard the clearing of a throat, he turned to see Y/n, she looked different, good, but different. For instance she seemed shorter  because of her not wearing her heels, he’d seen her a few times barefoot or in flats on rare occasions but it still took a little getting used to. Then his eyes shifted up to what she was actually wearing, the shirt and shorts were something he couldn’t imagine being in her wardrobe but she still looked gorgeous. “Ready to go?” She asked, looking at him. 

He nodded. “Y-yeah, how do you look better than me and we’re going to my friends barbecue?” He joked as he led the way towards the garage, he wouldn’t miss this chance to take Y/n, in his car. 

Y/n smiled and thanked him for the compliment, she took him in form the moment she saw him, with light blue jeans, a white tank top and a tan verging on white button up shirt over it with the sleeves rolled just above his elbow. As she realized they were making the way towards his car her brows furrowed. “Really?” She asked with a smile.

Bucky nodded with a smile of his own. “Yeah, you ready for speed?” He opened the passenger door for her. 

“I guess.” She shrugged, Bucky soon got into the driver's seat and pulled out of the garage. She’d speed after shoot outs and other work related things, she’s never just done that for fun though. Before Y/n had married Henry, she was a law abiding citizen just like most of New York, and until finding out what her father actually did for a living, she thought she was just an heiress. 

“What happened today that caused you to get dirty?” Bucky asked, knowing it could have been a million different things. 

“Drug stuff.” She said as if it were casual, then she sighed and shook her head. “Brock Rumlow is trying to sneak stuff under my nose.”

“Whos, Brock?” He asked with furrowed brows looking at Y/n swiftly before shifting back to the road. 

“Brock owns a drug cartel, and he wanted to become a partner of mine, but I shut it down, I don’t trust anything he’s got here.” She stated seriously. 

“Is he dangerous?” Bucky asked, Y/n caught the hit of concern in his voice. 

She shook her head. “I don’t think so, possibly just stupid, but if it does turn out to be dangerous, you’ll be like second to know.” She promised.

Soon they pulled up to a set of three story brown stones, her eyes scanned around just for safety, before following Bucky up the steps to the front door, after he knocked, the door opened a few moments later, a blond on the opposite end, Y/n remembered him from the wedding. “Hey.” He greeted Bucky, and then turned to Y/n. “Hello, Mis-”

She cut him off. “Please, if you're a friend of Bucky’s you can call me Y/n.” She smiled, holding out her hand. 

“Okay, uh I’m Steve, it’s nice to officially meet you.” He shook her hand as he spoke, soon letting it go before greeting them both in, first thing he did was introduce them to his girlfriend Sharon. “Sharon, this is Bucky, and his wife Y/n.”

“Bucky, nice to meet you, I’ve heard so much about you from Steve.” She smiled, shaking his hand, then she turned to Y/n.

“Hey, Little sister.” Y/n smirked looking at the woman who looked nothing like her, pulling her into a hug, usually a display of affection but this was anything but. 

“You have a sister?” Bucky, and Steve seemed to have said at the same time. 

Y/n pulled out of the hug first putting on a fake smile, showing Sharon the mood to put on. “Yeah, we’ve been out of touch since mom died.” That wasn’t a lie but it also wasn’t the full truth.  “Well, Steve, now that I know you're dating my sister, I’ve got to know everything about you.” She smiled, leading the blond to his backyard, to talk in private. “So, Steve, what do you do, to afford this beautiful home?” She asked standing beside him at the grill. 

“I’m the captain of a police precinct.” He told her honestly, making her nervous, wondering if this was a trap to arrest her, he clearly knew who she was. “Don’t worry, I have a rule with Bucky’s family, that I’ll follow with you, so long as I don’t see you do anything illegal I won’t arrest you. Is, Sharon, apart of the-”

“No, well, I don’t think so, I haven’t talked to her in a while so your guess is as good as mine.” Y/n shrugged, her eyes soon followed as Sharon and Bucky marched out of the house, Y/n’s eyes were glued on her sister not sure of what she intended. Y/n wasn’t going to be the one to break Steve's heart, but Sharon was certainly very deeply involved in the business, so Y/n didn’t understand why she was here playing a cute little girlfriend wearing a white sundress.

The barbecue went well, Y/n chose to minimally talk to her sister, and Bucky could tell something was up, so he knew to ask  about it later. Y/n stayed until Bucky wanted to go, she could tell he was happy, and comfortable with his friends, and that made her happy to see, and she wouldn’t take it away. A few of them had come up and told Y/n about Bucky being an idiot in high school, while protecting Steve from bullies, some of them making her laugh.

 Steve said bye to Bucky, while Sharon seemed to not want to look Y/n’s way, not wanting to attempt the facade of happy sisters. As Bucky pulled away he looked at Y/n, who looked at ease, and happy. “So what's between you and your sister?” He asked seemingly out of nowhere.  

The question had taken Y/n off guard, she hadn’t realized Bucky had seen through her facade. “We’ve never gotten along.” Y/n rolled her eyes, lulling her head to look at him. “And when mom died when she was eight-teen she ran off, which now looking at it I should have probably done the same thing.” Then she sighed feeling bad, she didn’t want to hurt Bucky or Steve, he genuinely seemed nice. “Look, Bucky, I didn’t want to say anything to Steve because we barely know each other, but I would suggest him try to leave Sharron, I think she is up to something.” She spoke honestly. 

Bucky’s brows furrowed. “She seems nice, what would she be up to?” Y/n looked at him as if he were joking. “You do know what I do to make money right?” She rolled her eyes. “Fine, ignore what your wife is saying about her sister, whom you just met.” She looked out the window, her mood dampening from his dismissal of her warning.

“It’s not that I’m ignoring what you're saying but do you even have proof?” Bucky asked, looking at her for an answer for that. 

“No, but I know my sister, I think better than you.” She rolled her eyes, shaking her head, once again. Then as they continued driving, in a stuffy silence, streets passed by as lights in the dark night and as they pulled to a simple stop at a light, still not even close to home, a low beet began to sound Y/n's brows furrowed as she began to look around the vehicle, for the source of the noise, it soon sped up and as soon as the light turned green and Bucky pressed his foot on the gas everything went black. 

[puppypeter]

PLEASE tell us more about your oc who was Roy's guardian at Sunderland and the domino effect it had on his relationships with older women I am on my KNEES!!!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏

I am once more circling back to my obsession with the potential of Sunderland!Roy and this headcannon has consumed my every waking thought. I NEED a fic that just chronicles Roy's experience growing up with her and the subsequent visits he pays her as he grows up. GIVE THAT MAN A PSEUDO-MOTHER FIGURE AND DO IT NOOOOOW‼️‼️‼️

Hahahahah I haven't fully thought her trough to be honest. It mostly came from the fact that I relate to Roy a lot and there's a recurring joke with my friends of how I somehow end up surrounded by older women, even my choice of gym class is a bunch of middle aged women and me (i'm 27), it's not even really a mum thing but for some reason you just kind of feel more relaxed around them? Like to me it's because they're so chill and they've been my age so when I stress about something and they "honey" me (in a caring way) it's just nice ahah (also I think brett goldstein said he also does a gym class with a bunch of women so maybe the yoga mums are a thing irl?)

Anyway - Sunderland Roy definitely needs more exploration. I like to think baby roy was a bit of a softie/dork and that being around his host allowed him the safety of being himself but then perhaps he got moved later on and combined with the struggle of not processing his grandad's passing and losing this supportive figure led to a lot of anger and obviously the being so good in an environment very fuelled by masculinity could have been the mix that gave us current roy.

I like to picture her as a much older woman but that doesn't really work unless instead of current-roy reuniting with her it's more of him going back to try and find her post-retirement when reflecting on his career (maybe talked about her with Dr Sharon when asked about if he's ever felt safe) and finding out she had passed years prior and dealing with the grief and feelings around that.

Or if she was younger like in her late 40s/early 50s making her around 80+ today they could still reconnect. Maybe she was a big football fan and he goes looking for her and then brings her to a match or something. I think he would totally take over financially if she needed like her place paid for, but not in a show off way, just to give her peace of mind. Also, love if she had been single when she was a host and later discovered she was a lesbian and married a woman or something. Like something something her, without fully knowing, being a safe space for little queer roy who also maybe wasn't really sure what he was feeling, but he never felt judged etc and I think that's also where he would;ve developed his strong hatred for bullies. She was a badass of sorts (also idk if you care for royjamie at all but i feel like it would be cute if seeing jamie and georgie is what made him think of her again and even more adorable if they were in an established but fairly new-ish relationship and he is invited to spend christmas with them and he brings her alongside ruth and phoebe)

[x-plain-cherik-ffs]

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE VS MCU - the post.

We’re going to compare both universes :), so buckle up and get ready bc this is gonna be a wild ride.

( this isn’t my way to try and point which one is better, I love them both, but it’s my opinion )

1- THE AVENGERS.

MCU’s avengers are full of angst. I think their film has the biggest joke count, but they spend like 80% of the saga arguing, which, I gotta admit, makes better their bonding moments, but still.

Steve’s the leader.

AA’s avengers are the dream team. They do not work together anymore but they assemble one more time to save their friend ( because that’s what they are, friends ) and then keep working together. They know each other, they understand how everyone works and are practically a well-oiled machine.

Tony is the leader.

MCU’s Avengers work together because they need to, AA’s because they want to, and it shows in the team dynamics.

2- STEVE AND TECH/PAST

Both Steves are old men, so we obviously can’t expect them to be as skilled with technology as anyone who was born after the eighties.

MCU’s Steve lives in the past. He tries to adapt to the future but we can’t see him actually trying to live there. When he has the chance to go live with Peggy in the 50s, he takes it. We don’t know if he gave it much thought, but he spent years in the twentieth century and he still couldn’t find a single reason to stay.

( Natasha and Tony were dead, but he still had Buck, Sam, Clint, Thor, Bruce Sharon, Peter P, the rest of the avengers… )

When AA’s Steve was given the opportunity to return to the Second World War with Peggy, he realised that his life was now there.

He was used to searching on the internet, and holograms, and murderous robots, and phone calls, and spaceships and else. He was used to the avengers, to having a team. A family.

And he knew he couldn’t give that up.

He wants to honor his past, not live in it.

[ also here’s a link with cool headcanons I really liked about this ]

As OP said in her post: people like to forget that modern technology is really intuitive, and Steve shouldn’t have that much trouble using it.

Pd: in AA there’s a scene in which Tony promises Steve to help him understand technology, one step at a time without it being overwhelming, if he teaches him how to be a little more “Analog”.

I’m not saying either of them ( Steves ) loves technology, but only one of them introduces it into his life and is eager to learn about it even if it’s hard for him.

3- HOWARD STARK

I wanted to talk about it given that in both universes Howard has appeared and/or has been talked about by Tony.

Neither AA nor MCU had me satisfied with this point.

⛔️( TW: alcoholism, parent abuse, underage drinking until after the green light )⛔️

Howard Stark is known to be a shitty dad in every universe. In the comics, he verbally and physically abused Tony and because of that he turned his back to people, because they, unlike machines, were too unpredictable. He forced him to drink alcohol from a young age, he tried to trade him to Dracula for immortality, he fought him in hell, he sent him to a boarding school because he wasn’t “man enough” and there are many fucking more.

Both Tonys have trouble with self-worth, building relationships, talking his problems, showing weakness and are always trying to make themselves necessary, and whose fault is that? Exactly. ✳️

They spent years resenting Howard for everything he did and everything he was not ( a caring, supportive, DECENT parent ) ( which they had all the right to do ), and still they tried to live up to his expectations. Even dead he was still making them feel not enough.

He always compared them to Steve Rogers, the perfect soldier and the perfect man, which made Tony resent Steve too when he met him.

What does this prove? Resentment is corrosive ( see what I did there? ) and Tony had no reason to love Howard! He only felt bad, insecure and unsafe around him, and all he makes him feel before and after his death was self-loath and resentment.

Maybe AA and MCU’s Howard didn’t do all that, but the series/films still showed that he wasn’t a good father either.

MCU’s Howard told Tony in endgame he already loved his son even if he hadn’t even been born yet. [ literal words: Let me tell you, that kid’s not even here yet, and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him ] This initially comes as sweet, right? Because he loved Tony.

But when you think about it, this means that Tony didn’t live up to his expectations, like it was his fault his father didn’t like/love him and he failed even if he didn’t do anything. He literally said he loved him more when he wasn’t there than when he was. He told him he did something wrong, when all he was doing was be himself.

No wonder he has self-esteem issues.

He didn’t do anything for him, except filling him up with trauma.

Both Howards said that Tony was their greatest creation. ( MCU’s a few moments after neglecting him and make him feel like a nuisance ), as if the way Tony turned out ( a good, intelligent, caring man ) had anything to do with him. He turned out that way TO NOT BE like him. Because all the shit he had to go through made him care.

He was never there for Tony, he TAPED himself doing fatherly-things instead of teaching them to his own son personally ( okay, he died, but Tony was like 17 when he did, he had the time, he just didn’t spend it with him ) [ https://smthgavengersassemble.tumblr.com/post/160060510540 ]

And when Steve talks about them in both universes, he does it as if he were a hero and Tony had to make him proud. AND TONY AGREES.

[ AA 2x17- Transcript -

Tony: you don’t get it, Arsenal was my father’s greatest creation

Steve: no, you don’t get it. Arsenal’s not you father’s greatest creation. You are. Make him proud, Tony ]

*GASPS*

THE AUDACITY!

When they met him as their adult-selves, they hugged him and had conversations with him as if he wasn’t ( in the best case ) an absent parent and ( in the worst ) an abusive one.

[ Here’s a nice post about that ]

So can anyone really be mad about Tony not trusting people or coming off as “mean” or “harsh” just because he’s afraid of getting hurt?

Next time I talk to a Howard Stark apologist I will commit a crime.

4- TEAM DYNAMICS

AA’s Tony is the leader, though he’ll take Steve advice blindly. He usually calls the shots but everyone’s free to give their ideas ( which will be heard and taken into consideration ). The rest of the team mostly just follow Steve and Tony’s orders because in the heat of the battle there isn’t much time for consideration.

AA’s Tony is sarcastic, charismatic, practical, intelligent ( duh ) and mathematical. He’s all about probabilities and physics and stuff, but he also has his moments of what I call “believing in the power of love”, which basically means acknowledging that being human, “vulnerable” and different from each other is what actually makes them invincible and unbreakable.

When he jokes he does it to make people believe he’s funny or to make them laugh ( at least that’s what I think )

MCU’s Tony is all of the above except “the power of love” moments. He loves humanity but he doesn’t acknowledge it as much as AA’s does.

When he jokes he doesn’t do it to come up as “funny”. He’ll say everything and If it’s fun, cool. If not, he doesn’t care.

He’s cool, tired, and he has spent all of the saga adopting every child he’s come across [ Dad!Tony Stark ]

AA’s Steve is way less problematic than MCU’s. He’s lighter, takes things seriously but not to an extreme. He cares about trainings and being prepared, he takes his job seriously and is very responsible.

MCU’s Steve is more serious, we don’t see him worry a lot about everyone training, just him. He cares about plans and preparation. He is also more conflictive.

In AA when Steve and Tony have a disagreement they talk, and they don’t attack each other ( verbally or physically ). They communicate. In the MCU all they do is fight and accuse each other, never really talking, but arguing because the other doesn’t make things the way they would.

[ this post shows the differences between AA and MCU’s Steve ( and Stony ) perfectly: ]

Clint ( ah, where to begin with )

AA’s Clint has nothing to do with MCU’s.

They literally just share the name and the aim.

AA’s is more like 616’s Clint. He’s carefree, cocky, fun, cool… he’s like the teenager who thought he was a cool kid. He loves food and 80% of his dialogues are bad puns ( or really good ones ), and he wears glasses because of the aesthetic.

MCU’s is serious, a certified dad. He jokes sometimes but nothing to really remember him for.

Nat is Clint’s best friend in every universe.

Gotta admit it, I like MCU’s Nat more than I do AA’s ( even though

In AA she is like this serious, mean, badass, harsh, mom of the group lesbian. ( she’s not a lesbian but she could be ), and I love her, but MCU’s more elegant while still being all of the above, and that’s the Natasha we love and would die for.

AA’s Thor is comics’ Thor. He talks like he’s a thousand years old ( which he is ) and has all this respect for the war and the customs of each culture.

MCU’s Thor is like some dummy in comparison. In the first two movies he’s serious and war-like, but in the last two he’s a lighter, funnier, sort-of-dumber version. ( Don’t saying I don’t love him, NOBODY CAN HATE THOR )

Now Hulk. In AA we usually just get to see Hulk, not Banner, and we gotta admit that Hulk is smarter in the series than in the MCU.

In the MCU we get to see Banner, which is a plus, and even though he’s not my favourite character I don’t dislike him.

And last, but not least, Falcon. Now if the hawkeyes were different, this is a whole other level.

They don’t have ANYTHING in common. Not even the age.

They’re both Sam Wilson and they’re both Falcon. That’s it.

In AA he’s practically still a kid, he’s like 20 years old and really smart. He usually helps Tony in the lab and creates stuff of his own too, but he shares Steve’s patriotism. He’s a mommy’s kid and he’s the newbie, but he doesn’t really shine.

In the MCU he’s a middle-aged man, ex-soldier and gives the best advice. He’s really sure of himself, he started off as a secondary character but now he’s a protagonist and captain America ( loved that ). He really steals the thunder when he’s in the scene, and he’s cool af.

AA’s avengers are much closer than MCU’s. They share things in common, experiences, they live together. There’s a certain domesticity we can see in each chapter, plus the banter and the “Hulk finished all the popcorn” stuff. They also help each other out, they have their bonding moments, they get over their pasts with each other’s help… they can count on each other unconditionally.

[ There was a time they were fighting Thanos and they won, so they were in the tricarrier and Steve felt something was off. He acted in consequence, and told the team Thanos was messing with their minds. He said “don’t you feel something’s not right?” ( or something like that ) and Tony answered “No, but if you do that’s good enough for me”. AND THEY ALL FOUGHT AGAINST THANOS. Now, THAT’s TRUST. THAT’s TEAMWORK ]

( credit to @justlous-art )

In the MCU they have some sort of strict-work relationship because they’ve proved that they can’t be together without a war for more than five minutes, at least on screen. We’ve seen them have parties and eat together, but it’s not like they’re actually connecting ( short of Nat & Clint, Nat & Steve and Hulk/Banner & Thor ).

That doesn’t mean they don’t care for each other deeply or that they can’t be considered friends, after all they’ve been through together there’s no doubt they care, just that they don’t share the same relationship and there are some parts missing.

5- AVENGERS DISASSEMBLED/CIVIL WAR

Now here’s something really simple and really complicated at the same time.

These two events happened because of different reasons.

When the avengers disassembled in AA it was because Tony kept important secrets regarding the team’s and Earth’s well-being and safety. He was putting them in danger, running blindly into the unknown, and Steve gave him a few opportunities to amend that, and he knew that he was on thin ice, but still he didn’t.

Steve told him he couldn’t be in a team where he couldn’t trust the leadership, so he left, and Hulk, Falcon and Natasha left with him.

They formed two different teams, one lead by Tony and other by Steve ( who was working with shield ) and even though they weren’t on talking terms, they still worked together ( not merrily, there was a lot of angst between them ) to save the Earth.

MCU’s reason to disband was that they didn’t agree on the sokovia accords

( here’s how each Steve thinks about that btw )

I admit it makes a little sense given the government’s punishments, but it all went downhill in the moment the winter soldier came up.

Now, I understand that MCU’s reason to cause a civil war was much bigger than the accords, and their reactions weren’t so off given that the winter soldier was the murderer of Tony’s parents and Bucky was Steve’s best friend, so I’m not gonna comment on that because I myself couldn’t have done it better.

We all can understand that in the heat of the moment we don’t make rational decisions, and peace was not an option in the moment Tony discovered Steve knew almost everything from the beginning and didn’t tell him. ( that was a shitty-person move ) ( Steve totally took Tony’s trust, spat on it and threw it under a truck )

In the link above we can see this gif, which I think counts as a conclusion for this point.

6- STONY

This is the last point, and the one I’ve been looking forward to.

There’s no doubt AA’s Stony is full of sweet, playful banter, care, mistakes, amends, fun, trust and forgiveness.

AA’s stony is the home of gay!Tony and bi!Steve, the fluff one-shot. Mutual pining, best friends to lovers, idiots in love!

MCU’s is more of a bi!Tony, gay!Steve, angsty 300k slowburn. It’s the enemies to lovers version, full of hurt/comfort.

It completely depends on what you want, and that’s totally up to the viewer/reader.

( I personally love AA :)) )

AND THAT’S IT!! THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED-TALK!

This one is the friends-to-lovers, established relationship, fluff, one-shot version. The bi!Steve, gay!Tony version.

MCU’s Stony is the Angsty enemies-to-lovers and emotional hurt-comfort slow burn. The bi!Tony, gay!Steve version.

( credit to @dakt37 )

What you choose depends on what you like best, it’s simply a matter of preferences.

[coachbeards]

like my biggest thing is that i don’t mind ted lasso being referred to as show about mental health!!! it’s just. I don’t get why they’re PRAISED for it. why they go to the white house to praise themselves for it considering,,,,,, Ted’s mental health worsened in season three, they had rebecca see a psychic instead of a therapist, they only put roy in therapy in the last like minute of the show, they made a joke about jamie seeing sharon because unlike keeley “she’s actually paid to listen to you talk” and they just treated it like a. oh haha jamie talks so much about himself haha. beard’s mental health was only addressed in like one episode (two if you count mom city but still they didn’t really delve into his mental health, just that he betrayed ted) and they kept making jokes about his obviously abusive relationship,,,,,, like. ted lasso is about mental health yeah but. God. them praising themselves about it and talking so much about men’s mental health and everything …idk.

[rilu-artblog]

You ever see a take so bad about that it makes you want to actually post something?

Anyways Gerald and Sheila do love each other, they just happen to be characters in a long running dark comedy cable tv show so of course their relationship is gonna appear whack sometimes

Warning for discussion of characters fictional sex life below, no photos but I just wanna make sure y’all know what you’re in for:

1. “They’re not sexually attracted to each other anymore”

Bro what show are you watching??

These two have literally never cheated on the other (both of the Cartman’s dad episodes imply that they both slept with Liane so maybe they did have a threesome) and Gerald not getting an erection that one ep is because.

He’s an older guy. Not because he’s not attracted to his wife anymore. In fact it’s probably why they do their UPS role plays and why Sheila is ok with Gerald watching porn, it shows how healthy their sex life is. Like, Sheila straight up had sex with Chef and was just outside the room like how was it honey :)

We clearly see them having sex with each other many times, but I’ve seen some arguments say that because their room is dark when they have sex, it clearly means Gerald doesn’t want to see Sheila and hates having sex with her? I’m sure many couples have sex in low lighting, but in-universe they probably turn off the lights so that their kids don’t come into the room (which clearly never works lol). Or out of universe, the network won’t allow them to show a full sex scene on cable tv (considering they also don’t allow them to show full frontal nudity except for the movie and streaming eps).

Anyways, tldr: the Broflovski’s love having sex with each other probably to the detriment of their sons lol.

2. However, I can get why some people don’t see them as emotionally loving each other. We see lots of moments where Gerald is scared of Sheila and Sheila can get really pissed off with him.

And of course, a lot of these moments come from Gerald, as while he’s not wrong sometimes that Sheila can be meddlesome, he does hide a lot of his shit from her because he’s afraid of being (rightfully) punished. Especially in season 20, we do see Sheila miss him and try to be open with him, Gerald doesn’t reciprocate not because he doesn’t love her but because he’s focused on his trolling.

We can either assume their relationship is always like this outside of season 20, where Sheila is putting in more effort than Gerald, or assume that this is just a special circumstance and Gerald is a bit more attentive outside of this season (which I think the show kinda implies? Idk might just be me lol).

3. So are these two an unhealthy relationship? Mmm depends, in the real world obviously yeah. But in the context of South Park the show, not at all.

Whenever people go “oh minor character’s parents are the healthiest/best parents on the show and have the best relationship” it’s like…well yeah duh, we don’t know anything about them.

As parents of the main characters, they are hands down the most loving. They’re not shown fighting with each other or cheating on each other (the hot tub incident is iffy but I think Gerald is just stupid when it comes to friendships lol). They definitely have their flaws, but never in a way where it feels like Sheila is parenting her husband, she rightfully calls him out.

It might seem like a low bar but again, considering the show, the two of them treat each other kinda ok. Season 20 really soured their relationship for a lot of fans, which is expected, but I think for current fans who’ve gone through the 3 almost divorces of Randy/Sharon, any marriage that doesn’t rely on “god I hate my nagging wife” jokes is a relief.

TLDR: You can like or hate characters for literally any reason, people can depict them any way they want, I just got really annoyed for no reason lol

[mischief-and-tea-by-the-sea]

Fandom asks for MCU <3! 3, 5 (Loki), 6, 9, 17 (Tony), 22 (Emma)

3. NoTP?

Scott Summers/Jean Grey, Logan/Jean Grey, Anyone/Jean Grey (I mean, if I have to have her around in a fic and shipped with anyone, it's usually another character I don't dig either), Steve Rogers/Peggy Carter, Anyone/Peggy Carter, Steve Rogers/Sharon Carter, Steve, Bucky, Sam/Brock Rumlow, Tony Stark/Pepper Potts (I mean, I can deal with their relationship as a past relationship turned best friends, but I'm not gonna read or write their ship as I think they weren't really healthy for each other - like Ross and Rachel.) Loki/Grandmaster (I will make references to it as a past thing that Loki did for survival but he hates it). Loki/Thor (There's some pretty-pretty artwork out there, and I will acknowledge that it's gorgeous and can enjoy it as artwork, but as an actual pairing, no. Just not my thing.)

5. Out of all your fanworks that include [Loki], which is your favourite?

Obviously, my on-going WIP series Hemispheres would be the top of that favorite list, but then I'd have to say I'm torn between these two:

What's on your mind, half of the time, (brother mine)

and

A little shy and sad of eye but very wise was he

Both of them feature Loki in vulnerable moments. The first one, he's like 5 and tiny and adorable and scared of the storm. He gets to meet a stranger who boosts his confidence a little. And the second one, he comes back after a grueling time in Asgard with Thor, who's still being far too bullying, and his friends and is really low about it, and Tony gathers everyone up to make a blanket fort (as Loki's never experienced one before), order Loki's favorite take-out, and watch movies to comfort him. Wholly self-indulgent on the comfort side.

6. Show us a bit of a WIP!

From "Too weird to live, too rare to die" (Justin Hammer/Loki)

“So Loki made friends with Natasha by helping her with mission stuff?” Justin roped them back around to the other topic. 

Nodding, he answered, “Yeah.  He did some spellwork for her.  Imbued it into a piece of jewelry that essentially all she’s gotta do is think about how she wants to look, and that’s how she looks.  The spell lasts as long as she needs it to, and then when she’s ready to not look different, she just thinks of herself and bam.  Nat again.  No more dying her hair unless she wants to, no more contacts, no more tech that can blitz out on her.” 

Justin looked impressed.  A little skeptical, him being a tech and science guy like Tony, especially tech, but still impressed.  He wondered how Loki’s ‘magic’ could be utilized in their own tech, but he figured Tony had already been thinking about that. 

“Nice.  Sounds like he’s much better as an ally than an adversary,” Justin remarked as he finished with the last of the dishes.  He dried his hands and hung up the towel again. 

Tony took in how easily Justin took on the domestic task of dishes.  Seems like he learned some humility in prison, after all, and wasn’t looking to be waited on anymore.  Perhaps there was hope for guys like them after all. 

“Much better as an ally, though don’t let the gentle smiles and the fun tea parties he has with Morgan fool you.  He’s still dangerous when he wants to be.  He’s like a cat.  Don’t rub him the wrong way or you’ll find his claws slashing your hamstrings,” he joked, but the serious look in Tony’s eyes said he wasn’t actually joking. 

Justin walked over to the fridge, grabbing a glass along the way, and filled it up with ice and water.  He took Tony’s glass from him to fill it up, too, and handed it back, refusing to see the pleasant surprise in that gaze that followed him around to take a seat at one of the tall chairs at the counter.  Cold, pure water rushed down his throat and gave him time to think of how to respond to what Tony said.  Setting the glass on the counter, Justin turned it around and around, watching as the water remained calm even in its movement. 

“You think Loki’s dangerous to people here and you let him stay?  He’s really close to Morgan from what I hear.  I don’t see him much.  Passing in the halls, when we eat.  That’s about it, but your kid adores him.”  Justin let out a breathy laugh.  “I think she adores all of us, though, so I think that’s just her.  Big heart.”  Like her dad. 

Moving across the kitchen so he could belly up to the counter next to Justin, Tony took a drink of his water and set the glass down.  Two men, both at one time consumed by the big buck, by reputation and prestige and power, by controlling the playing field where weapons and tech were concerned, rivals – not bitterly so but rivals nevertheless, now sitting side by side, drinking fucking water for fuck’s sake, when they used to be dripping in the finest whiskey and women.  Burying the hatchet, and not in each other’s skulls. 

Tony never would’ve believed it could happen, especially not after he and Rhodey had to face down Vanko and the shitstorm he brought that Justin bankrolled. 

It was kind of nice, though, given that one of the last people Tony’d wronged in the past had injected his ex with Extremis, which still made Pepper a fiery handful to deal with, but at least, they’d gotten a handle on it for her so that she did set people on fire with her fists anymore.  While he’d never specifically wronged Justin the way he had Aldrich Killian (and really wronged was a little strong for just saying he’d been a spoiled dismissive asshole), he had been a dismissive asshole, which pushed Justin to make one of the worst decisions of his life. 

“I don’t think Loki’s a danger to Morgan ever,” Tony finally stated and tilted his head to meet Justin’s curious stare.  “I don’t think Loki’s a danger to me or Bruce or probably not Thor anymore.  Not since we’ve all sorta ganged up on Thor and told him not to be a dick to his brother.  The stabbing’s stopped at any rate.  You, though.  He doesn’t know you well enough yet, so I’d just say...tread carefully.  You never know when you’ll end up on a mission with him.” 

“Yeah, about that,” a voice from behind them announced. 

Tony and Justin swiveled their seats. 

Phil Coulson met their eyes. 

9. Write a recommendation of someone else's fic you enjoyed!

Okay look, I have so many bookmarks and fics I could recommend that are tear-jerkers, kept me on the edge of my seat through months and months, that made me swoon, and I could easily give any and all of those. I could and I would! But this asks for one fic, and I'm gonna go with one that made me LOL so hard it woke up dog up from a nap in the other room and had my sister asking me if I was okay because for a second, I couldn't breathe.

Clark's Chicken by @kleenexwoman

I don't normally read DC fanfic. I like DC okay enough to know generally who the major players are, but I'm not invested. However, I am invested in my friends and their creative sparks, unless I'm just really not at all into a particular fandom. I can't really write a full review to say what it's about other than it's not exactly safe for work, definitely not for kids, though teenagers would love this, I think. I think that's why I love it - I'm still 12 and masturbation and fart jokes make me giggle. (There are no fart jokes in this, but discussion around masturbation is.) I want as many people as possible to read this fic because all the laughter in the world could finally heal humanity, I think, and if we could all laugh our asses off at this one, it could drive out the darkness all around us these days. Seriously, I believe this fic has the potential to lighten the world, to drive out the fascists, to heal the sick and sad, to build a protective bubble around the vulnerable - all through the laughter that this fic will grace people with. READ IT AND LEAVE KLEENEXWOMAN SOME LOVE ON IT.

17. What's a book, movie, or show you think [Tony] would like?

Book - American Gods - He really rooted for the New Gods at first, especially Technical Boy and Media, but somewhere in it, he really dug Mr. Wednesday, Mr. World (and especially Mr. World's reveal).

Movie - Real Genius

Show - McGyver (remake)

22. Give us a headcanon for [Emma]

So many people give Emma shit for being cold, stand-offish, and snobby, and because of this, Emma performs that to perfection. However, around those who see past this barrier, she's loving, warm, tender, kind, encouraging, compassionate, and has one of the biggest hearts they've ever met - and she uses her big bucks to take care of the people she loves.

Thanks for the asks!!!

Fandom Ask Game.

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | Cop (Harris, 1988)

Given how textureless and calibrated for mass appeal so many of Hollywood’s current movie stars are, it kinda rocks that somebody like James Woods could headline movies back in the day, someone who had no superficially appealing qualities beyond a certain reptilian magnetism and a knack for rendering profane dialogue dancerly with his delivery. You could say that Michael Douglas fit in the same category, but I think there’s an aspirational quality to the Douglas persona. Sure, he was a piece of shit, but he was also banging Sharon Stone and making millions of dollars at the same time. Nobody aspires to be James Woods. Nobody wakes up and says “I wanna grow a vagina in my chest” or “I wanna be sweaty and coked out and deeply unpleasant to everyone around me”. If you’re reading this, I’m referring to your characters, Mr. Woods. Please don’t sue. Also, can you please call up S. Craig Zahler and get him to put you in a movie? Anyway, as a screen presence, he was the epitome of scumbag swagger, a quality this movie makes the most of.

When I’d last watched this, I’d considered it a decent movie with a great Woods performance in the middle. Revisiting it, I suppose that’s still true, but I’m more receptive these days to a movie built around an electric central performance. James B. Harris’ direction is somewhere between perfunctory and sturdy, which lets Woods’ verbal gymnastics pop all the more. The sleaze emanating from Woods pollutes the seemingly conventional movie around him. Woods does a lot of the same shit that happens in every other cop movie, but instead of cheering him on, Harris’s direction observes, the lack of editorializing letting you grasp pretty quickly that what he’s doing is maybe not good. To paraphrase Letterboxd user Kai Perrignon’s astute review, the fact that this doesn’t fully hang together as an investigative thriller is maybe the point, as it becomes a document of Woods’ profound shittiness. Now on paper this is a much more respectable affair, but the infamous ending leaves you with the same unsettled, punch to the stomach quality you get with the sleazier Bronson Cannon joints.

***SPOILERS BELOW***

I think the one weak point in the movie is the Lesley Ann Warren character. Warren plays a feminist bookstore proprietor (in that she owns a feminist bookstore and happens to be a feminist herself, so the label is true however you read it), who in her first scene with Woods falls for his charms after momentary resistance and ends up going to bed with him the same night, instead of, I dunno, busting out the pepper spray. Jokes aside, Warren is good in the role, and I think there might have been a way to handle this arc without truncating it so obviously. I suppose between her and the killer being a sensitive male feminist carrying out misogynist serial murders, there’s something potentially satirical here, even if it isn’t really pulled off onscreen. But I think any peripheral weaknesses become non-issues given how much Woods dominates the movie.

[cantsayidont]

Movies movies movies:

THE WITCH WHO CAME FROM THE SEA (1976): Disquieting, bloody psychological drama, directed by Matt Cimber (later the founder of G.L.O.W., and the basis for the "Sam Sylvia" character played by Marc Maron on the 2017–2019 G.L.O.W. TV series), about a disturbed young woman named Molly (Millie Perkins, wife of screenwriter Robert Thorn), whose horrifying history of childhood abuse causes her to sublimate sexual attraction into dissociative homicidal fits, when she isn't doting on her two young nephews or drinking herself into a haze. Vibes like an exploitation movie, but too arty and surreal to really qualify as one, and it doesn't ever feel quite like a horror movie despite the lurid subject matter; probably the closest comparison is Abel Ferrara's MS.45, with which it would make an apt double bill. Demands strong CWs for CSA and suicide, both of which are pretty rough, but it definitely makes an impression, perhaps most strikingly in the later scenes where Molly's seedy boss (Lonny Chapman) and bitchy coworker (Peggy Feury) begin to grasp how unhinged Molly has really become, leading to a disturbing finale. Too unsettling to easily recommend, hard to forget.

ALICE GOODBODY (1974): Lightweight, smutty exploitation movie, written, produced, and directed by Tom Scheuer, starring Sharon Kelly as a starstruck Hollywood waitress who loves old movies and movie stars (most of whom the people she meets in the industry have barely even heard of) and who is determined to get a small part in a new musical about Julius Caesar, even though it means sleeping with almost everyone in town. A kind of cheerful low-stakes sex comedy they don't make anymore: The situation is obviously sleazy, but not in any way that ever puts Alice in any particular jeopardy (she's in far more danger on set, where she keeps suffering different workplace accidents). The movie's central running joke is that the men whose favor she's supposed to be cultivating are at least as fixated on their own weird obsessions and neuroses as on sex, something Alice just has to sort of work around as best she can, which ends up making her sympathetic and even relatable. More likable than you'd think.

SPICE WORLD (1997): Delightfully dopey Girl Power homage to Richard Lester's A HARD DAY'S NIGHT, starring the Spice Girls, Richard E. Grant at his Richard E. Grantiest, and a cast of thousands. (Just picking out all the cameos and guest stars is half the fun.) This is what I think the Greta Gerwig BARBIE movie was going for: obviously a commercial product, and making no apologies for its mercantile ambitions, but self-aware enough and full of enough sly piss-taking to be thoroughly enjoyable even if you aren't in (or never had) a Spice Girls phase. Goes on a bit too long, but Grant's outfits alone are worth sticking it out for, and the bridge-jumping climax is very funny.

KALIFORNIA (1993): Mordant thriller starring a disconcertingly young-looking David Duchovny as Brian Kessler, a young writer who blows his advance for a new book about serial killers on an old convertible for him and his horny art photographer girlfriend Carrie Laughlin (Michelle Forbes, with disconcerting bangs) to drive across the country, photographing famous murder sites. Along the way, they pick up a couple of hitchhiking hicks, Early Grayce (Brad Pitt) and Adele Comers (Juliette Lewis), to help pay for gas, not realizing that Early is a paroled convict who's just murdered someone and has no qualms about dropping more bodies along the way. Tim Metcalfe's script (with obligatory '90s voiceover narration) scores some points early on in its depiction of Brian and Carrie's obvious classism and brittle middle-class hipster intellectualism, but the story ends up validating their prejudices rather than questioning them, which keeps the film from being entirely satisfying despite its effectiveness as a thriller. The cast is very good, with Pitt and Forbes the real standouts — Pitt plays Early as a man who draws no line between aw-shucks Southern congeniality and murderous rage, while Forbes makes Carrie's mix of ambition, appetite, and roiling intensity so vivid that you come away wondering what she's doing with Brian, who Duchovny plays as a somewhat gormless jackass. As for Lewis, suffice to say this would make an interesting double bill with NATURAL BORN KILLERS, released about a year later, where she plays a variation on the same damaged theme.