#sent there for a diagnosis
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You know what at this point I feel like maybe I just need to either get institutionalised again or start an internship again because I feel like I am getting nothing.
#sorry after going down a rabbit hole i realised that there are a lot of very vague things wrong with most of my characters#and that perhaps i should make. less vague things wrong with them.#like more specific things#and i understand the theory of a lot of conditions but that doesnt mean anything#thats jackshit#and naturally in my life i have met a lot of people with various conditions bu the sample is still fairly limited#ive met people with OCD; with various anxiety disorders; people with various eating disorder; i live with one ed myself; ive met#people with schizophrenia both treated and untreated; ive met people with bipolar; ive met people with schizoaffective;#ive met people in a state of active psychotic episode; ive met people DID and OSDD; ive met people with PTSD;#ive met people with cluster C PDs and people who have BPD like me and ive met exactly one (1) person with NPD (about whom#docs arent fully sure yet)#but thats all. and its like. cool. ok. no idea about cluster A except for me (STPD) and no idea about the lived realities of the rest of#cluster B and no idea about some forms of depression and no idea about a lot of things. so its like. cool. i sure love not knowing.#its like. ok. do i have to get locked up again to meet new kinds of people or?#the thing is that probably wouldnt help i can tell you right here right now thered be like uuuuuh 50 % ED recovery people;#25 % affective disorders; including like one bipolar person probably; 15 % OCD patients and 10 % of undiagnosed people#sent there for a diagnosis#thats actually literally the average population of a psych ward. been there three times happens every time#i mean im exaggerating but you get me
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in honor of anatomy of a rose debuting this weekend...
some memes
#chao time#anatomy of a terrarium#michael fully throws nick to the floor it's incredibly funny#michael when you least expect him for real.#charlie tries to have a serious conversation about nick's diagnosis#bc it's obvious nick is like#pretending he isn't bipolar bc he eall can't deal and the entire time#nick is on too many sedatives to even move or speak so he's just STARING at him#Charlie: IT'S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD#Nick: -frog blink-#nick also makes the fool's choice to flush his meds bc he thinks he's recovered from bpd#and ends up walking to the ocean without telling anyone.#hence why michael throws him to the floor over it.#nick's just trying to have his hysterical woman sent to the sea to recover moment#tao is also there i should mention that#nick: manic and chatty#tao: wow i love you so much if you hang up this phone im gonna kms.#nick: damn :/// guess i can't kms rn.
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me: so yeah i feel super dizzy and lightheaded when i stand up and also just at random times of the day and also my heart just starts pounding randomly and it skips a beat randomly at least once a day and im also experiencing these other small things that i realized probably arent normal
the cardiologist: yeah, your heart’s beating too fast, but that’s just Normal Teenager Things™️! probably just like dehydration or something lol
#at least he sent me for blood tests and stuff#(which all came back normal)#and i have to wear a heart monitor for three days#my parents got mad at me because its been happening for a while and i didnt say anything#but in my defense i genuinely just didnt know that it wasnt normal#i thought that it just happened sometimes#also i didnt know the amount until i actually started to have to track it for the heart monitor#and maybe im not drinking Enough water but i genuinely dont think thats the main issue#i could be completely wrong but it feels like its more than that#we’ll see i guess#once im done with this and they get the results in and decide if they want to just brush it off or whatever#also had a nurse who was like weirdly insistent that i mustve been drinking a shit ton of soft drinks#just cause i mentioned that ill have a soft drink with meals sometimes (not nearly to the extent she was trying to say)#and she wouldnt believe me or my mom when we said that the soft drinks are pretty much always zero-sugar zero-caffeine#tachycardia#i mean thats what the doctor said it looks like#i dont really know what else to tag#chronic illness#maybe???#i dont know i dont have a diagnosis or anything so i dont wanna be like “oh thats def what that is”#also#pots#possibly#i did a shit ton of research on my own and i just really felt like what i was experiencing was lining up with it#but i dont wanna self diagnose
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I have a meeting on Monday with a social worker to review my medical history so I was checking and printing everything and the first unspecified abdominal pain I had diagnosed it’s from 2022, damn
Have been in a “tummy hurt send help” state for longer than I thought
#also the fact the diagnosis is literally unspecified abdominal pain???#and they just sent me home like that#your honor I had a tumor on my intestines thank you for nothing
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idk whats worse the idea that my parents genuinely dont believe that mental illness exist or the apparent reality that they Do believe in mental illness they just dont think people need accommodations or medication. is this a joke. taps on the glass let me out of my enclosure
#i didnt tell them abt my dyscalculia or the autism but i did tell them about the adhd and the anxiety#they were both like 'oh we've known since u were a kid' AND U DID NOTHING ABT IT ????????#and my dad pulled the 'oh haha u just wanted the diagnosis so u could get special treatment for school' what if i beat the shit out of u#i cant believe my parents watched me in high school fighting for my fucking life to pass my classes#and just. didnt think it was worth seeking a diagnosis or accommodations.#theyre such like. throw you in the deep end so you'll learn how to swim kind of ppl. but would it kill u to throw me a life jacket. would i#also !! to the anon who sent me the long message abt whether i should tell my parents about my diagnoses#that was very nice of u thank you :] i kept it in my inbox so i could look at it lol#anyways. ugh its fine its whatever. the response i expected tbh. whatever!#jc.txt
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For the record I spent months going back on forth on whether or not to talk to my doctor about the possibility of me being Autistic, getting my self so worked up over the fear that I was giving my self an incorrect self diagnosis and would be laughed out of the hospital. Or that, like my ADHD diagnosis, it would take an incredibly emotionally taxing year before I got an answer, until I finally worked up the balls to just get it over with.
I spoke to the guy for like 10 minutes before he went “yeah you’re definitely autistic, we’ll mail you a questionnaire for you to answer but that’s really just a formality, you’re a clear case”
#the autism closet was made of glass I FUCKING GUESS#I just wanted to share this#he caught me SO off guard it was so funny#he finished asking me questions and just sent “yeah so I can give you an autism diagnosis’’ and I said you can do what now#cause I shit you not for my ADHD diagnosis it took over a year#it was horrific lmao#and then it took another year to get medicated#but this MF diagnosed me with autism and prescribed antidepressants in the same half hour meeting#all whilst some medical student was sitting in the corner taking notes on my autism#autism#textpost#Sadie thinkin#Sadie Shitposting#shitpost#meme#adhd
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i know i'm not a medical professional but i simply could not imagine withholding a diagnosis because your 5 year old patient's mother doesn't fully understand the condition
#one of my students had a paediatrician appointment today and we thought he would walk out of it with a [redacted] diagnosis#bc we did the assessments the doctor had asked us to do and sent her all the reports#but the doctor decided to “give his mother time to read and better understand [redacted] before giving the diagnosis”#i'm sorry but what the FUCK#like mate YOU asked US to do an assessment. but you didn't talk to the parents about what [redacted] is???????#so now this child doesn't get to have his needs met and the support he needs to access school in a way that is meaningful to him???#be so fucking for real#i very rarely talk about work on here bc hello government employee but i am so heated about this#i cried on the phone to my partner when i called him about it lmao#neptune speaks
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changeline blood is the only thing that can melt the white wax seals on the acceptance letters.
#random thoughts#these letters are sent to all changelings across timelines once they turn twelve.#(obviously nobody knew about the koivunen siblings until a few years later. so they got theirs late.)#they are a request for a diagnosis into angel akathaemia.#first they diagnose the placement and deviation. and then a few tests to prove intelligence.#if the tests are failed then they are sent to a lower scholys depending on their placement.#there are three of these. because. three placements. so. (':
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today i learned there are only two doctors in my entire state that specialize in my very common nervous system disorder, and one actually had to close his waitlist because it was over two years long. so best of LUCK to me trying to actually get a formal diagnosis or any sort of treatment. meanwhile my health deteriorates every single day so cooooooooooooool 👍
#hikey#disabled lyfe#it's become increasingly more obvious lately that everything that ails me connects back to my nervous system#which makes me kinda wanna cry bc i literally saw a neurologist years ago and she damn near laughed me out of her office for bringing up EDS#like i presented to her with so many symptoms and so much pain and she really told me 'i don't know why they sent you here i can't help you'#like maybe if she had believed me and listened to me back then i could have started this diagnosis journey THEN#and probably avoided ever getting so sick too#bc i am Not Well and it's getting worse and idk what else to do honestly
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i got like 10 people to take the RAADS-R test today
the topic of autism and self diagnosis came up again, and i always go "the first place i went to told me to pay $3000 for the assessment + with a diagnosis there comes a ton of legal barriers such as immigration, so until all of that stops being a thing, self diagnosis is totally okay as long as you're looking at reputable sources for that information"
which became people comparing RAADS-R scores, and then more people started the test as well.
Out of everyone there, one person got below an 80— with a 20. (The threshold for autism is 60+/240, I got a score of 190)
#and i got to talk to a bunch of people about synesthesia and hyper/a-phantasia as well#i sent so many people links to websites today#and i find it funny that i spend most autism conversations deterring people from getting a formal diagnosis despite having one myself#i think if you can get supports through a different diagnosis with less weird legal issues then absolutely do that instead#i was extremely lucky to get in with a psychiatrist that did assessments for free eventually#but the first place was like “our ASD assessment service is a total cost of around $3000”#also referring all the autistic people to autism supports (there's so many good ones in my city and i know them all)#i am also love learning more about the overlap between queer identities and autism (and just neurodivergency in general)#i personally know some of the people doing research in that area and I've participated in like 8 different projects#anyways yeah i thought it was funny that out of 15 people there was 1 allistic person#autism#actually autistic#autistic#actuallyautistic
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on the train to my new gender therapist and looking out the window the world is so pretty <3
#switching gender therapists bc i wasn't vibing with my old one and it was in a different location from my endo#but now i have to have new intake talks and I'm a little nervous#i mean i already have that stupid diagnosis and started T but i still need to get top surgery#and i hope they won't give me issues for that (I'm afraid I was too honest in the questionnaire they sent me)#so I'm just scrolling Tumblr and looking at the pretty world outside to distract myself#and listening to music#blake rouse#found him randomly the other day and have had it on repeat since#vincent.txt
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me when i spend all morning filling out important forms and sending important emails like Hell Yea i am indeed the Productive Boi nobody can stop me from Doing Tasks (as if i hadn't been procrastinating all of these things for Literal Months smh my head)
#so silly that to get an adhd diagnosis#you have to fill out questionnaires and write emails in your own time#with no deadline#like cmon#you do understand your target audience right#but yea today is the day#i'm finally Doing Stuff#and i also sent some forms to do with gender stuff#and emailed my mentor for mental health support and stuff#yippee
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good morning <3 !!
#ooc; onion girl enthusiast#((i just had a call from a place about a form i submitted about getting an adhd diagnosis))#(( and it went well i almost cried jkffd))#((i *did* cry a little when we hung up))#((i dunno what it is about these peoples voices but theyre so calming it makes me wanna bawl immediately))#((anyway my forms been sent to a different place to be looked at so where they'll decide if they think i actually have it..fingers crossed)#((i'll be waiting anxiously but god im happy i got the ball rolling))#((hope youre all well this holiday season!! <3 <3 hopefully i can write a bit today <3))
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so i guess i probably have interstitial cystitis
#this is the diagnosis i was least hoping for#if it was small kidney stones like i thought they coulda just blasted them with a laser and wrote me a flomax rx and sent me on my merry way#instead i get diagnosed with chronic piss your pants disease#interstitial cystitis#chronic pain#personal
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you are here with us in spirit (this is one of my favest ts songs btw)
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THABK U <3 im always there in spirit with u
#btw im going to read the fic u sent me#but i have to read another one first#bcs me and my friend r playing a silly little game#of like doing things the first time again sfter my autism diagnosis lol#and i want the first fic i read to be sometimes i think im a killer by r3medial ch8os#u should read it btw its SO GOOD#moots <33#kavya <3
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“April has school.”
“April’s always had school, and that never stopped her before.”
“April has college.”
“She did her assignments here in the lair. She can multitask!”
“Hmm.” Splinter grumbled, snuggling in under the blanket. “She did not get me sweet and sour pork when I asked.”
“Well, she—” Raph started, then squinted at him suspiciously. “Wait. She said you only surfaced to get cake.”
“And she’s tattling on me!”
#rottmnt#rottmnt fic#infinite ricochet#yes this is v. late but IN MY DEFENSE#I got an ADHD diagnosis which ironically sent my brain out to lunch for a few days#kindly endure my terrible photopea job
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