chaoortu

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Hey, I just wanted to tell you that i’m so happy you decided to make Nick trans in your poppyseed universe and also in your new baby fic. I really feel like there is a serious lack of trans Nick fics. Like in 90% of the stories where one of them is trans it’s always Charlie. And while there are so many really amazing stories, that bring some real value to the fandom, there are also a lot of fics where it’s GLARINGLY obvious why they made Charlie trans (for multiple reasons)…. and it’s a bit upsetting tho, lol

So yeah, thank you for writing these incredible stories and also for showing that masculine guys can be trans too 🩷

Dude, yeah. That was a big part of why I made Nick trans in that fic series and why he's trans in the new baby series. There aren't many trans!Nick fics and like obviously I took matters into my own hands with that. In general, in a lot of fandoms, trying to find trans fics where the more masculine character is ftm is incredibly difficult for ... reasons! I think about this sort of thing a lot especially because I do cover trans parenthood in these fics-- I want to make sure that it doesn't come across as if I've made Nick trans for the express purpose of reproduction/sex/etc. you know? And it's also important to me to show Charlie, a gay man, being romantically and sexually interested in his trans partner. It's not at all lost upon me that a lot of people make Charlie trans because with Nick being bi it "makes more sense" but I've never been able to relate to that personally. Like on one hand I'm sure a lot of people hit Charlie with the trans beam because he's more relatable than Nick is to the audience, more feminine, easier to project onto, but I'm always like hm. Also like I am a more masculine trans person and I want to see myself sometimes in the space I navigate and I couldn't in a lot of the fics I was picking up, so I made my own about it. Idk i feel like I have so much to say about like trans character dynamics bc on one hand, a lot of those fics are written by fellow trans people, on the other I'm just like fuck dude. How many fics about periods can there be? (this is generalized and not just about HS) like the typical: "today i woke up and put on my binder, because i'm dysphoric. :(" kind of thing, i get it. i really do but being trans is such a spectrum and i like to do more sometimes. Literally anytime, I freaking love writing them.

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Also come like Mid-September I will probably be putting all of my fics on pause to focus on kinktober. Yes, I'm cooking something up. I hope everyone is prepared for my narlie secretary au.

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how’s the accidental baby fic going? hoping you are still really enjoying writing it

it's going v good! i'm about 10k words in and it's... fun so far, definitely a bit campier than what i normally do (i think?), just finished up Nick basically telling Charlie he does NOT believe in sparks but he believes in their daughter and if Charlie cannot love Phil (their kid) as much as Nick does, than he literally won't accept anything else. Which is both fucked up but if we consider Nick's trauma from having an absent dad-- I don't think he'd accept anything less, you know? and the whole time Charlie's just like really fucking in love with this man even when he's being mean to him and he's still coping with the knowledge that he has an ENTIRE TWO YEAR OLD.

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nick nelson is neurodivergent, chapter by chapter analysis is coming back. i found my og post and im gonna pick up where i think i left off.

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just saw an hs tweet abt autistic nick nelson... my impact... my agenda... it's finally spreading.

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smthn that i really do love about horses is their personalities. i love that some horses are dumb, that some are so sweet and loving, and others are mean as fuck and yet all of them still communicate the same way and you can learn to communicate back. there's something about connecting with a 1000lb+ mammal with a gentle press of your calf or looking a certain direction, your body leaning subconsciously one way and the horse follows because it wants to go where you do too. or when you're working a horse who's just recovered enough from an injury to be ridden again and they start going fast, and they get excited. it's like riding around on a mini freight train. or when horses know what to expect and when you don't deliver, they simply won't do what you want them to until you ask correctly. only you are in control of the moment when you're around a horse. they can kill you. they can kill you so easily which is why you need to learn how to communicate with them, what makes them tick, if they're ticklish, if they hate men or are perhaps a little too affectionate. i nearly got kicked square in the face by a horse and it was one of the single most terrifying yet thrilling experiences of my life solely because i knew the horse well enough to know both why she tried to kick me and that i could jump back without scaring her further. horses are a perfect lesson in communication, power, and patience and i feel lucky every single day that i get to be around them.

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avalanche

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Joy Sullivan, from “Soup”, Instructions for Traveling West

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The Horseman's Companion. Written by Margaret Shelf. Illustrated by Wesley Dennis. 1949.

Internet Archive

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I think the concept of introversion may have harmed a lot of people, tbh

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did you change nicks birthday in you adored me before?

... no i just forgot when his birthday was so now it's the 17th....

dw our king is still a virgo

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sometimes im really fucking glad i recovered from my ed bc i just a housed a foot long from subway in under five minutes and instead of crying screaming throwing up about it i'm drinking my iced coffee and going about my day with zero of the guilt i used to have. #win

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i need to eat a food. none of the food in the house is The Right Food. what is the right food? only god knows. and we're not on speaking terms right now.

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this is a sign to update your wips

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I have to say I love all your fics. Where do you get your ideas from?

ty!!! so this is going to sound very egotistical and like tooting my own horn. generally speaking, they just come from my head although i pull a LOT of inspiration from the shows, movies, and books i read. i watch at least two movies a week and although i am in a reading slump now (which i think is contributing to my writer's anxiety LOL), i was reading like 2-3 books enough so my creative well is usually like overflowing.

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are we going to get to find out more about the younger kids before you wrap up and the winner is??

they are five, i'm doing my best to show y'all more about them.

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do you think you’ll ever rewrite a fic like won’t get fooled again? The way you were writing that was SO good

im actually planning on rewriting it/tackling it at a different angle bc again-- the thing that made me go oH NO was that i absolutely only liked writing nick's povs and i hated doing a canon rewrite. so, im thinking abt actually starting it with the paris trip meeting and moving it forward from there bc all i actually wanted to rewrite was paris trip and post-paris trip and THIS IS HS, EVERYONE ALREADY KNOWS HOW NARLIE KNOW ONE ANOTHER and it's fic and i want to have fun. also ty layss i love seeing u in my activity section it's so good to get a ask from u i'm kissing ur head through the screen. muah. but only if you like that sort of thing, if not, i'm def not kissing ur head through the screen