#scheduled this til after the exam

[instantkingjustaddtea]

The sources for this exam are hilarious.

Prime minister doesn't know how many shots are in a prime-minister salute and gets the number wrong by 3 shots

He refers to "Gerhart" as "Gert" in a public interview

Greenland: We recognize it would be benificial to open for fishing, but only under state control and in accordance with laws specified by comittee. Prime minister: Yah, we can do things before the comittee, they'll take years anyhow, you go ahead. Greenland: no.

As far as I can tell atm, one dude has invented a whole other dude to just to be mad at him for rules dude1 himself broke.

[cauldroncreations]

why did god think it would be so funny to give me a terrible terrible phobia of anything to do with losing teeth or tooth pain or infection while also forcing me to go through some of the most horrifying tooth related ailments

[ros3ybabe]

Daily Check-in: April 24, 2024 🎀

Wednesday started out so rough, I had a really bad stress breakdown from the pressure I was putting on myself for the exam I have today (Thursday), but luckily my dad was able to calm me down over the phone and my boyfriend motivated me and encouraged me. I don't feel as stressed out anymore, I know that I know the material and I'll do great! (it's a chemistry exam)

🩷 What I Accomplished:

studied chemistry for a good bit

completed 3 chemistry homework assignments

scheduled a make-up quiz for my psyc class

did the Total Body Pilates video from Blogilates

did the 11 minute Wake Up Yoga from Yoga with Adriene

did my morning skincare and journaling

actually, just did my entire morning routine and felt great about it

shipped off shorts I sold on depop

went to chemistry lecture to review for the exam

went to my virtual appointment with a registered dietitian and set some goals for the next 2 weeks

decided to join a step challenge with my health insurance company to win points (they have some cool things in their points shop, plus extra steps during the day is good for my health!)

washed my laundry

made a brain dump list for the remainder of the week

💞 Good Things That Happened:

I really like the dietitian I met with and have another appointment with her in 2 weeks

I really enjoyed using my new 40oz Simple Modern insulated tumbler cup

didn't let my stress breakdown make me go home, very proud of myself for sticking to my plans

went to sleep early

sold another item on depop!

I felt very reassured that I know the content that is going to be on my upcoming exam

the guy who makes sushi at my campus food court made sushi for me and held it until I went to get it so no one would buy it, i could've cried it was so nice of him

I drank coffee on campus and it didn't hurt my stomach for once!

💔 What Could've Gone Better:

need to put less pressure on myself

had some issues with food after my dietitian appointment (sometimes thinking too much about food can be triggering for me, tbh, but my goals are nutrient based which is helpful!!)

started crying before I went to bed because I was feeling oddly emotional (I think I'm starting my period soon)

had to turn down a work shift because I had too much school stuff and that appointment (I need the money so bad tho)

did not drink near enough water

need to be more patient and gentle with myself

also need to really figure out what's going on with my priorities, I keep struggling to do the things I say I'm going to do which is difficult for me to deal with sometimes

need to remember progress over perfection, 50% is always better then doing 0% of something

💗 Stuff For Thursday

clean my room

listen to a podcast episode

maybe do some more laundry

make a grocery list

clean my bathroom

therapy today over video call

reschedule a morning appointment

chemistry exam tonight

try to ship off the shirt I sold on depop

do some more planning and organizing for my life

that's all for now! Thursdays gonna be good. My exam is gonna go great! I have confidence in myself, and my knowledge and I know I've got this!

til next time lovelies 🩷

💕 Song of The Day: Baddie by IVE

Gotta remind myself of this sometimes <3

[woso-dreamzzz]

bambi’s relationship with alexia is so so complex and sad to me ohmy (sorry for the long msg!)

can’t fault alexia for the postpartum and her initial feelings towards bambi. everything for her was difficult and at the end of the day, she decided to go through with the pregnancy and carry bambi til she was ready to be introduced to the world. alexia can’t be faulted for not feeling an initial connection. nothing is perfect, and their relationship (like bambi’s train) is quite fragile.

i’m pretty sure i mentioned it before but i feel like alexia’s behaviours/attitudes towards bambi manifest in very selfish ways. bambi after the “Before” is someone for alexia to keep, to create a false image of what alexia thinks is a perfect family. before the “Before,” alexia wishes for bambi to start looking like her because MAYBE that’ll make her feel more connected. this makes me wish that bambi never looked like alexia until jenni’s version occurs, where bambi had no semblance of alexia’s features and jaume looked like his grandfather, whom he got his name from.

i feel like bambi would’ve overheard alexia going on and on about how perfectly jaume fits in the picture—because to bambi, that’s all alexia’s ever really cared about: if things fit into the timeline. fit into the family. fit into alexia’s schedule, alexia’s life, alexia’s wishes and wants and desires. in bambi��s POV, she’s nothing but the little girl who so happened to impede on alexia life with the worst timing ever. to bambi, alexia never wanted her. bambi doesn’t fit in (she doesn’t look like any of her known relatives), she doesn’t excel at football, and she feels like she definitely does not have anything in common with alexia.

so, the move to mexico is good for her. jenni’s great at implementing a system, thinking ahead, and prioritizes bambi above everything. there are regular video calls and visits for alba and eli, jenni knows mexico will be a culture shock so she does her best to acclimate bambi to her new home. all of alexia’s teammates are on speed dial for whenever bambi wants to call any of them. alexia definitely walks in on mapi and ingrid saying they hope bambi’s received the new train in the mail and that they’re so proud of bambi for landing the lead role in her first recital in mexico—one she ultimately finds out alba and eli flew out to go see without telling alexia.

with the move to mexico, alexia only yearns for bambi more. after all—distance makes the heart grow fonder… but in this case it’s just alexia wishing for something only because she doesn’t have it. to alexia, jenni’s version bambi begins to grow into her features and soon resembles alexia in the most heartbreaking way. bambi shares almost all of alexia’s features to a T but all of her mannerisms are picked up from jenni. it’s a cruel reminder to alexia to watch little bambi become alexia’s mini me from a distance, especially because bambi credits all of her joys in life to jenni, her “true mama.”

a really bad for bambi and alexia tho, following injured: before! deep frowns and all the love to both of them. <3

how are exams going tho, my friend? hope you’re almost done :) do you have anything planned for the summer? 🌷

Alexia suffered pretty badly from post-partum depression. She wasn't expecting it so it hit like a truck.

Injured!Alexia's love for Bambi does manifest as her being fairly selfish (but only in the main story of Injured, she eases up in Alexia's Version). Alexia and Bambi had a rough start to their relationship so Alexia was never quite sure how she was meant to act with Bambi because everyone just kept telling her about how much love she'd have for her once Bambi was out and never mentioned any of the hardship so Alexia's fairly wary when other people tell her what they do with their kids. Alexia found that being a bit selfish with Bambi worked and she didn't want anything to go wrong (it did) so she just kept it as it was.

The best thing Alexia did in Jenni's Version was get over her selfishness to let Bambi have the best chance. Of course she regrets it a little bit because she's very quickly cut out of Bambi's life and only hears things second hand but she also doesn't regret it because she's the one that made the choice to go to Jaume first instead of Bambi and she's the one that decided she couldn't change enough to let Bambi have the best life possible with her.

(I just took an exam today. It was horrible. I waffled for ages so I've no idea how I actually did. Just the exam today and then the exam on Thursday and I'm officially done. I'm out with my friend on Friday to to Toby Carvery and then I move out on Sunday!

I haven't really got any plans. I head back to work in June and I already know I'm going to hate it yet again but whatever, I need the money 🤷‍♀️)

[iantimony]

tues

last tuesday in my apartment! going away for ~6 weeks! trying to be normal about it! posting this pretty early in the day compared to normal because i woke up insanely early from my roommate's cat yelling ... then i got bad period cramps and languished in bed with a heating pad for way too long ... did not end up going to my office today, oops ...

listening: like many others i have gotten sucked into the kendrick/drake Beef. i do sporadically listen to hip hop and rap in general but somehow had never gotten around to kendrick. better late than never, i suppose! this is not news but he's really good!! i listened to 'good kid, m.A.A.d city' for the first time and it's just really really good. i cannot recommend a Single Favorite Song the way i sometimes do with albums i like just because this is one of the ones that i let wash over me as an entire cohesive unit. do recommend if you have somehow lived under a rock like me.

reading: mostly fallow. some academic paper stuff. biting my nails about prelim exam things.

watching: dunmeshi and asobi.

playing: ran an insane dnd session saturday for the online weekly group that i got roped into earlier this year ... i'm glad i'm running it, i'm having a lot of fun with it, but my god. we decided to do a 'slightly' longer session than normal because we're not gonna get to play for about a month due to scheduling/travel of various people. it was Six Hours Long. AND THEY COULD HAVE KEPT GOING. killing myself For Real. but actually i do have fun i just. woof. i am excited to have a bit of a break from it. the only tabletop thing i will be doing with that group until like...june 8??? maybe even the week after? is i set up a spindlewheel spreadsheet for me and one of the players! he had to go awol for a few weeks and we're doing a little spindlewheel game as a way to plot out what his character was up to in that period, very fun, will be low-pressure and asynchronous.

making: trying to finish up some pottery stuff before i leave town! carving in crows into this bowl that i will be painting in with black:

handles added to the new cave painting mugs:

and i went to life drawing again for the first time this year! i will not be back at that specific studio til july lol rip but i plan on going to a local place at least once when i'm at home :) 3 min poses, last sketchy one is a 5-minute, and then the hour long!

finally, the bookbinding stuff i did last week and forgor to post! the little one is scraps to test coptic binding, the bigger one behind it is going to be a travel journal for when i'm in the UK for two weeks :)

eating: really really fallow. a lot of eating out and scrounging frozens because i'm leaving town for a while. hoping to cook for my family while i'm at home. i did eat basically an entire jar of grilled olives from trader joes.

misc: i cannot believe how slow this semester went for most of it and then how fast it's been for the end. good god. i leave my apartment in an hour to go get my brother from the airport, we hang for a few days, and then off i go on saturday! fucked up for real! i'm very excited to see my boyfriend and then go abroad though (!!!), less looking forward to feeling like i'm trapped at home again, but maybe this time will be fine (doubt but hopeful). god i need to think about packing, huh. fuckin hell.

[stevenbasic]

GITJ Post 281: Thinking About Her

I’d gotten to work a bit late that Friday, having been exhausted from yesterday and sleeping for more than twelve hours. The office, once I finally made it downstairs from my room, was abuzz with energy. Though my schedule didn’t start ‘til eleven, Vida and Morgan were seeing patients; the girls wanted to take it easy on me, I guess. And so here I was in my office, sipping on the glass of warmed-up milk Melissa had left for me along with a note. She was sorry to have to miss our Friday meeting, occupied in the other wing helping sort out some things with the construction teams. She’d be there most of the day. Huh, that’s too bad,  I thought. I’d been looking forward to seeing her. The world seemed emptier, and definitely colder, without the idea of her being around. I shivered, in fact, despite the warm milk and despite the suit jacket I wore over my too-large button-down shirt. Had someone turned down the heat?  I found myself sniffing the little yellow sticky note, hoping for an extra whiff of her perfume, and beginning to thumb through her Instagram archive for maybe my thousandth time, looking for some warmth. A couple minutes in, my cock already swollen and having attracted the unconscious rubs and attention of my right hand through my khakis, a text came through from Melissa. It’s weird but if I didn’t know better I’d say she was spying on me haha, and knows she’s on my mind…

Yes, yes, I admit it: I missed her. 

My day was not too busy with patients but nonetheless it went along quickly enough. I found myself always hoping I’d see Melissa when I came out of an exam room, or hear her voice down the hall. But apparently she was still tied up next door with the construction. We chatted through texts a bit; I did my best to sound flirty and funny, and asked if they needed my help or input. Nope, she said I didn’t have anything to worry about. Despite how badly I wanted to stay relaxed about the whole thing I couldn’t help but think: what in god’s name were they doing over there?? And - why didn’t they want my opinions? They were, to the best of my knowledge, building new medical suites. What sort of decisions was Melissa making that I shouldn’t at least be consulted on?? Melissa had her…ummm…better qualities. Her strengths. The abilities needed to plan out a new medical office were, I was sure, not among them.

But maybe she’d surprise me.

Anyway, thinking about her - what we did together yesterday, and the promise of what we might do together next time we could be alone - kept me from perseverating too much on all that. In the name of not sounding too eager and desperate, I held out as long as I could but by midafternoon I’d asked her, through texts, for another date…that evening in fact, if she was free. I felt my heart sink when she said she’d be “doing something” with her mom. But she told me how - what? What’s this? - Marisela was setting up a television for me in my apartment, as we spoke, that very afternoon. How did she get into my place? Why didn’t they ask me if I wanted a television? But concerns like that didn’t seem to bother Melissa too much, and apparently I was getting a free TV out of the deal…I didn’t dare ask from where. “We don’t want you to be bored!” Melissa said, apparently knowing I didn’t have a television before and probably couldn’t afford it after my devastating divorce. Great, but, still…how embarrassing was that, accepting a gift like charity? Having a girl set it up for you in your apartment?

That bothered me, a little, I guess. But as my casual conversations with Melissa went on over the afternoon, and we set up a date of sorts (I guess I’d be going out with the lot of them…)

Other things started to bother me as well. I thought back on the pictures and disturbing messages I’d gotten from Angie last night. How did she know about…all that? The intimacy Melissa and I had shared? Some of it was, like, really private stuff, and kind of embarrassing. Jesus, I remember being lifted, carried like a child, talking with her about our size differences, basically being a worshipful simp…and somehow I kinda think Angie had heard about it all. Thinking Melissa was that open about us with her friends made me uneasy, for sure. Even over the airwaves, through our text bubbles, Melissa could sense my unrest, that something was on my mind.

…jesus. I couldn’t help but have thoughts, images…a shrunken little prince, surrounded by his harem.

=====================================

Patreon? Try it I think you'll like it.

[springdandelixn]

Missed Chances and Broken Promises - Part I

Summary: Choices have been made and the consequences must be endured.

Warnings: Angst—that's my warning

Characters: Loki x F!Reader

A/N: I started out on tumblr waaaaay back but it was only October last year that people started reading my work and those people are my fellow Loki lovers. BCD was such a hit when I first released it and it was an angst piece that, I am confident to say, broke some hearts. So here's another as my special day approaches, my gift to you people who have brought me where I am today. Thank you! ❤️

p.s. This is a continuation of my Loki University AU fics Secret Serenade and Study Buddy.

Your feedbacks and reblogs would be very much appreciated. Enjoy! ❤️

Leaning his back against the headboard of his bed, Loki closes his eyes and murmurs back to himself the lecture he’s been reading for the past hour. 

Exam week is over for most of the students in the university, and he should be amongst the them, partying the nights away to celebrate a job well done. But a night of staying up late to help you study caused him to sleep through his alarm and miss the last test he was supposed to take the morning after. 

It was worth it. He told himself after scheduling a make-up test with his professor. You passed, and to him, that was most important. And he couldn’t be any prouder to have all your hard work paid off. Definitely worth it. 

The knock on his door takes him by surprise, his forehead creasing in annoyance for disturbing his time to review. He told the other to keep it down, to not bother him for tonight. Even getting into an argument with Sam when he decided to blast the speakers in the living room, the squabble only subsiding if his brother, Thor, and Steve didn’t interfere.

He keeps his eyes closed, hoping that if he ignores whoever is on the other side that they would get the message, go away, and leave him alone. But they don’t, the knock only becoming more insistent this time, Loki inhaling deeply in an attempt to calm the irritation bubbling within when he hears his brother’s voice.

“Go away, Thor,” Loki calls from his bed. “I specifically requested to not be disturbed.”

“But brother—someone here wants to see you.” He responds, amusement evident in his voice.

He groans and then rolls his eyes as he gets out of bed. “Well, did you tell them I was—” He starts, ready to throw his brother away, but his voice dies in his mouth when his eyes land on you standing beside his brother.

“I did tell her that you were busy but she was pushy.” Thor chuckles, his hand playfully resting atop your head. “And you know I can never say no to this lady.” He adds. 

“Sorry, Lo.” You giggle and jokingly nudge Thor with your elbow. “I was hoping to talk to you for a bit.” You reason, mirth present in your eyes. “I promise to be quick then I can get out of your hair.” The smile you give him makes his breath hitch. 

“I—” He gets flustered, his hands turning sweaty at your unexpected visit.

“Maybe we should wait til he’s finished studying.” Thor offers, Loki suddenly going into a surge of panic as he darts his eyes from his brother and then at you. “You can join me and the boys for a game of beer pong while you wait—that is, if you’re up for it.” He doesn’t know why but the smirk his brother gives you makes his blood boil. “Natasha’s stopping by as well.”

“That won’t be necessary, brother.” Loki butts in, his throat bobbing as he swallows thickly when both pairs of eyes land on him. He faces you. “I can be bothered for a few minutes.” He says with a nod, pushing his door open and gesturing for you to walk in.

“Are you sure? I really don’t want to intru—”

“It’s fine, darling.” Loki smiles, his hand slightly twitching before he pushes his confidence to the front and reaches out to take your hand in his. “Please, you know you’re welcome any time.”

“Great! Because I would have been really sad if you kicked me out.” You kid before giving Thor’s hand a light pat and taking it off your head. “I might have time to beat your ass at beer pong later, big guy.” Thor laughs at your playful taunt. 

“Oh, but I was practicing.” He grins before facing his brother. “Don’t keep her too long, brother. Or you can—up to you.” Loki could feel his face heat up when Thor winks at him, not missing the innuendo he sent his way. He waves his brother away to which Thor holds his hands up in defense before leaving the both of you. 

Loki keeps his eyes on his brother’s back before focusing his attention completely on you, a smile gracing his lips as he leads you into his room and closes the door. 

He loves how comfortable you are in his space, immediately hopping onto his bed and grabbing the notebook he dropped atop the sheets, flicking through the pages. Loki could feel his heart beating at a quick pace, his mind going blank as all he could see and think of is you underneath his sheets and waking up to your face every morning for the rest of his days. 

“How’s the studying going?” Your question pulls him out of his thoughts and he smiles when you pat the space beside you, moving to take a seat and curling his arm around your waist when you cuddle closer to him. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were dropping by?” He asks, his fingers lightly tapping your side. “I could have just gone over to your dorm.”

“I wanted to surprise you.” You say, glee lacing your voice. “Besides, Wand has Vision over and you don’t want to hear what they do behind closed doors.” He laughs upon seeing you cringe, taking the chance to lean his body against yours and pull you closer. “Oh, and I got you this.”

Loki keeps his eyes on you when you hop out of his bed, leaning over his desk and opening a bag he didn’t notice you carrying earlier. Curiosity mares his face then surprise when you pull out a bottle of tequila from inside your pack. 

“What’s this?” He asks.

“It’s an apology present.” You utter, bouncing back to sit beside him and thrusting the bottle in his hands. “I know you missed your test because of me and I wanted to make it up to you.” 

He looks at the bottle, hands caressing the glass while his thumb runs over the label. 

“I know it’s not what you’re used to,” You begin and he looks up at you, the shy smile on your face making his heart feel full. “but it’s the best one I could find within the budget, and around the area.”

“It’s fine. I like it.” He says.

“Liar.” You tease and grab the bottle from his hands, twisting the cap open before tossing it at his desk.

“No really. I do.” Loki grins and takes the bottle back in his hands. “Thank you, darling.”

The blush creeping up your neck and face doesn’t go unnoticed, Loki reaching up to caress your face, his thumb gently rubbing circles against the apple of your cheek. His breath catches in his throat when you take his hand and lean against his touch. Instinctively, he scoots closer, pulling his leg up to the bed and chuckling when you suddenly sit between his thighs.

“Well go on.” You blurt out, his eyes remaining on your face when you give his hand a light nudge. “Drink it. Then I’ll drink next.”

He stares at the bottle and then lifts it to his lips. It couldn’t be that bad. He thinks. All tequilas taste the same. But as the amber liquid slides down his throat, he couldn’t have been more wrong. He coughs after taking a swing, his face turning sour then shuts his eyes tight before repeatedly swallowing his saliva to rid the acrid taste from his mouth.

“Ugh—That’s delicious.” He grunts.

“You’re such a liar, Odinson.” He catches you rolling your eyes when he opens his, relieving himself of the liquor when you grab it from him and take a sip yourself.

“Are you alright?” Loki asks, laughter escaping his lips when you begin coughing all the same. Loki takes the bottle from you and carefully discards it at the foot of his bed before placing his hand on your back and rubbing circles against it to help ease your obvious discomfort.

“You’re right.” You heave and face Loki. “That tasted great.”

“Best tequila you ever had?” He asks sarcastically.

You laugh. “The best.”

“Loki?” 

The memory suddenly fades and he’s transported back into the present when he feels a hand carefully rest against his thigh. He blinks and faces Clarice who looks at him with worry etched on her face. “Are you alright, dear?” She inquires. “You seem to have drifted off for a second there.”

He looks around and takes in his surroundings. He’s in her—their apartment—the atmosphere warm and inviting with the aroma of the scented candles filling the living room. Yes, as comforting as it feels, Loki can’t seem to find a sense of belonging despite living there for almost a year. 

“Ah, yes—” He turns back to his girlfriend, pushing away the uncertainty that looms over him. “The tequila just reminded me of something.” He says, eyes drifting down to the tumbler he’s nursing against his knee, the ice of his drink already melted, diluting the alcohol.

“Oh?” There’s curiosity in her voice, Loki moving on the couch when she takes a seat beside him, wrapping his arm around her shoulders when she scooches closer and rests her head against his shoulder. “It must have been something special for you to lose yourself in it.” She says.

It was. He tells himself, for that’s the truth. 

Every moment he spent with you, even before you both shared that kiss on the beach, he treasured. Especially the ones where you both weren’t bound by the expectations of relationships, simply being friends yet also so much more. How you both tip-toed around your feelings for one another. Each memory engraved, not only in his head but in his heart.

But all of that is now in the past and he refuses to reminisce and dwell in a time that no longer matters, that no longer exists. There’s nothing to be had living in the past, nothing to be gained from missing what had already happened and thinking about what could have been for he’s already made his choice.

So he does what he does best. 

“Really, darling. It was nothing important.” He lies.

I no longer keep a tag list but if you want to be kept updated on my fics, follow my side blog @springdandelixn-archives and turn on notifications.

[sirensea14]

Doodled Allen my beloved comfort character. Im still listening to his song even after breaking down. But halfway in the doodle, i lost some motivation to draw. Im just mentally tired, thats all. I dont know what should i fucking do anymore. Someone please bring me to an asylum or anywhere where i can die. Im feeling way too fucking low tonight.

The doodle didnt help either. I only have little mental energy left to post and rant this shit. And this fucking school is rushing us. Too many deadlines, too many formulas, too many prelims before exams. And the schedule's all hectic due to the extreme heat.

I dont know, i dont fucking know. And i dont even know about what im saying to you that 'i dont know'. My mind is so confused. Spiraling. Its a whirl of chaos of either too many or too little thoughts. This mental tiredness thing happened way too suddenly.

Im so fucking tired but its only a few weeks left til this sy's gonna end. All i need is just a fucking peaceful sleep and enough free time for art.

[sdumpdiary]

diary entry 01

I wasn’t sure of what to post as my first entry in this dump diary but since I view this diary as a way to remember starting the life i’ve been dreaming to live, i will start with me reaching my dream of becoming a doctor.

I have always joked about having no one to blame but myself on why I ended up having sleepless nights and unpaid / underpaid labor as a medical student / intern. I did not come from a family of doctors nor did I have any person or big thing influence me. The dream and calling was all… me! Going through medical school all whilst under a pandemic was not how I imagined it to be. It was definitely harder and lots of tears were shed. But before I knew it, I was in the hospital as a clerk slaving away, then I was graduating from medical school. After which, a year of internship also passed and the board exam anxiety kicked in.

Board review season came along and it was a gruelling 2 months of non-stop studying. My schedule was packed and I followed it as much as I can. I would wake up at 6AM to make breakfast, start my video lectures and handout at 7AM. Take my lunch at 12-1PM. Start studying again by 1PM til about 10PM at night. Sometimes my friend and I would go to a café or a study hub and we would spend the entire day studying. That went on for 2 months everyday. Even on my scheduled rest days, I would squeeze in 4-6 hrs of studying. Moreover, what I think I did right was that I made sure I slept around 6 hrs every night which was a huge factor to why I was able to study well during the day. I also took necessary mini breaks in between.

I had a total of 2 breakdowns while reviewing and 1 breakdown in the middle of boards. The latter breakdown was after day 3 of the exams wherein I encountered one of the most difficult exams in my life (the board exam in general was pretty fucking hard). It made me lose confidence in myself and I actually thought that maybe there’s a chance that I won’t make it. And that broke me.

Waiting for the results was even more painful because I would have bouts of anxiety attacks whenever I would get triggered by anything boards related. Then it happened: Oct 19 at 12:30AM, the results were released. I was in my condo unit alone and asleep. I purposely slept through it because the wait was killing me. I got multiple missed calls from my boyfriend and my cousin who was all the way in UAE. I woke up to answer my bf’s call and heard “congratulations doktora”. And all I did was smile in disbelief and all I felt was happiness. It did not soak in at that moment still. I hurriedly called my family to wake them up and tell them about the news that they have been waiting for for days. My mom cried tears of joy and my dad and siblings all congratulated me. It was surreal, at that moment I felt relief. I felt as if I gave back the most precious thing I could back to my parents. All of the breakdowns, the endless coffees, the numerous dried up highlighters were all worth it. I did it. This time, I can say that I really did it.

[whatrmywordsworth]

salt air

You weren’t mine. 

When we were walking back to your house, skin burned from the sun, sand glued to our feets. I told you the worst joke you’ve ever heard and you bursted out laughing. Soon, I did too. Your eyes filled with tears and blocked your view, but I guess it didn’t matter since your hand found mine. That was all I needed. I breathed in the sea breeze and the smell of your wet hair. You brought me closer and kissed me as if the world would end the very next minute.

You weren’t mine. 

When the old door creaked as you opened it. “My parents won’t be home ‘til evening”, you’d say. You took my palm, squeezed it gently and started walking to the stairs. My bare feets were slowly adjusting to the warmth of the carpet leading to your chamber of secrets. I landed on your bed, among snow-white sheets, newly changed. You laid next to me. I never needed anything more. Your pointing finger was painting things on my left cheek. You smiled and I smiled. Your lips parted and three words came out of your mouth. I nodded shakily and assured you that it was what I wanted. 

It was just a summer thing. 

When I stole the red wine from my grandpa’s cabinet and got drunk after one glass. You were sitting on the floor, faraway, slurping yours, watching me as I was dancing around the room. You seemed to be absent, so I started making silly sounds, I may’ve burped, when you spitted out the wine. It took you back from wherever in your thoughts you were with her and it made you sad. I tripped over as I was stepping closer to you. The floor was cluttered with our shoes, uno cards, pawns and my perfumes. It was an obstacle course, preventing me from reaching you. She was an obstacle course, keeping you away from me.

You weren’t mine.

When I was waiting for you to call me once the summer ended and you never did. I was swallowed by school again. Paperworks, exams and sleep-lacking nights full of books and tired eyes. I was busy, but not busy enough to erase you from my schedule. Friends would ask me out, I’d say “Sure, I’ll come,” but then drop out at the very last second. Keeping myself delusional that you’d reach out. Days turned into weeks, nights turned into forever without a word from you. I should’ve known, still, I kept the guard. As the winter came, I gradually started to realise the dreadful truth.

It was just a summer thing.

[autobot2001]

A New Challenge

@mediwhumpmay: dizzy @themerrywhumpofmay: "Take a break." (Snippet from Hidden Killer) 

Prowl has been helping the police with the serial killer investigation. With the number of victims adding up, he sees this case as urgent. Denying the lack of clues to lead to an arrest. He's been working on the case for sixteen hours a day. Hating the endless circle of reviewing the little evidence the police has.

Three days of this schedule starts to affect him. He starts feeling dizzy. Prowl thinks he's dehydrated, but drinking water doesn't help him. "You're overworked," Ratchet tells him, "it's obvious without a health exam." "Take a break," Optimus insists, "you know this case is unfortunately at a standstill," Prowl knows Optimus will order him if he has to. Ratchet will declare Prowl unfit for duty if he has to, "I believe you have another case to deal with. If you know what I mean." Prowl realizes he shoved building a friendship with Jamie to the side even while wanting to work on it for a year. What irony I thought of that when the Holiday Killer first showed up. Now he's back, and I remember how I wanted to work on my friendship with Jamie. Prowl thinks. Ratchet does order Prowl to rest for the day. He and Optimus want to talk to Jamie's guardians.

Prowl goes to his room and back to bed, hoping the dizziness doesn't last all day. It's not long before he has a headache. I guess I'm staying here all day. Prowl realizes. Drift texts him about being informed about his new assignment. Prowl hates how Drift is calling this an assistant. The conversation ends after Drift's text agreeing, saying it's an assignment isn't great. By now, the light from his phone is bothering Prowl. He hides under the blankets. Hoping his heavy schedule doesn't turn into a migraine. Relieved he's not feeling dizzy.

Prowl ends up falling asleep. Waking up at noon and feeling like he wasted the morning away. Even if he knows he has a task now, he needs to learn not to cause things like spending time with friends to become a task. Whether ordered to or not. Then he realizes when was the last time he did anything fun with the Autobots? "How hasn't Optimus lectured me about this yet?" Prowl sighs, "even if it's just because we're on Earth that the war isn't non-stop, I'm amazed it took til now for Optimus to say something. This is my fault, even if the issue is working too much."

"You can't blame yourself," Drift tells him, "you need to do better with your work/ life balance, but with Jamie's cross-dimensional traveling and mental health, this will be a challenge." Prowl knows Jamie's history but has yet to learn how things have been the past year. He is concerned about how worried Drift is but knows Drift would tell Optimus if this is a bad idea.

With how bad Prowl's work/ life balance is, Drift is determining what the second in command is interested in doing for fun. Prowl is embarrassed he has no answers, at least for suggestions for group activities. "Take her to McDonald's for lunch," Sunstreaker suggests, "it's lunchtime, and he won't like what Jamie watched and definitely not video games." This is going to be harder than I thought. Prowl sighs. "Seriously, you need to do better with your work/life balance," Sunstreaker comments, "and with Jamie's social anxiety, this won't be easy." "I know, and I think being second in command isn't going to help me." "You know Jamie is complicated, Prowl," Optimus adds, "you need to be patient with her. You'll have something else to do until the case isn't at a standstill and afterward."

( This is what came to mind though it's complete — Prowl accepting he needs to do better with his work/ life balance — but incomplete because how does he achieve this? Will he succeed? I feel like this is another subplot that will appear in several stories but will have an endpoint compared to my other subplots)

[ros3ybabe]

Day 16 - 90 Day Challenge 🎀

I was still in a lot of pain yesterday (Thursday), it was a very odd pain, but I've woken up today (Friday) and it's finally gone! I'm excited because now I can move around without that uncomfortable feeling. I still didn't do much yesterday but I figured it was worth an update, regardless. That's the point of this challenege. Accountability and consistency.

🏋‍♀️ Physical Health

walked to work (~20 min)

scheduled my gym times for today and next week

found out the gym hours for my campus gym for the first part of winter break so I can schedule in gym time for then too

🧠 Mental Health

made myself get up and out of bed after work to curb how I was feeling (felt kinda numb and decided I needed to do something productive about it)

❤️ Emotional Health

therapy appointment! (may have been my last one until january, thank you gobernment for ending my health insurance coverage today)

was honest with my boyfriend about how I was feeling (was super grateful with how he handled it, hes so patient and understanding and kind to me, I'm so happy with my relationship with this man. I love him, so much)

📚 Intellectual Health

completed the respiratory lab report for my Anatomy lab

made a list of things to accomplish Friday morning (at the study room I booked)

filled in my planner with the rest of the assignment I have due

🏘 Adulting

worked a ~4 hour shift (recieved an actual frozen ham as our christmas gift from work)

cooked spaghetti for dinner for myself (needed comfort food)

cleared my old food out of the fridge

got my work schedule for next week figured out (my last week of work before the break, I could cry because I'm not going to see my work bestie until probably march of next year - she's super pregnant and due in the beginning of January)

filled in my budget for November and realized I spent over my means

deleted shopping apps from my phone

made a tentative lost of some goals for 2024 (might post them! thinking of breaking it down into monthly, quarterly, and yearly stuff)

zoom called my loving boyfriend <3

🥰 Self Love/Care

full morning skincare

full night skincare (I love how my face feels and looks after I oil cleanse)

I actually did a good amount of things yesterday, surprising with how much time I spent in bed not feeling like myself. But today is going to be a good day! My goals for today are to have a decent morning routine, finish and submit my final research study paper for my psyc class, attend the make up lab session for anatomy, attend the lan session for my psyc final exam (that's on monday), go to the gym, and make it through my work shift.

til next time lovelies 🩷

[leam1983]

Moisture

So, yeah. Gots me a brain scan scheduled for tomorrow evening, so I'm under the medical obligation to hydrate like my life depends on emptying two bathtubs' worth of glug-glug juice before the next 24 hours end. As to why, it's because iodine is a bitch to properly evacuate post-exam, Lube up those kidneys, apparently, and things get much easier.

The problem is, as stated before, I have asthma. I have my ISO 9002 certs in Mucus Production, and my lungs produce the finest, clearest ooze in all the land. When I'm less obsessively soaked, it has a bit of a phlegmmy consistency that, paradoxically, makes it easier to ignore. I can breathe easily for several hours, normally, and suddenly feel the need to duck to the side and out of sight to scrape my airways. Without too much water content, the entire excess mass comes out in one go, ready to be either spat or sneezed into oblivion.

Now, though, this shit's liquid as fuck. It's just slightly grippy and doesn't follow along with my attempts to free up my trachea, which makes me cough more and irritates my airways. I haven't driven myself to nausea in decades and yet here I am, fetching a bowl from the kitchen...

Walt glances at me. "Oh, I don't need you to start on the potatoes until about six, you've still got an hour to go."

I respond by inhaling as if the intake were an extra pair of arms I were shoving down my throat-hole, and producing the kind of wheezing cough you'd expect out of someone who's treated their lungs for a grafted-on Party Mix box of Pall Malls.

"Yeah, that's not for the potatoes..." I say. Sarah doesn't really know what to do, but Walt gestures for patience as he sets the kettle to boil and picks another bowl.

"You never told me," asks the big guy, "did your parents ever try clapping?"

Ah, yes, the time-honored tradition of bashing an asthmatic person's back until everything that's stuck to their lungs falls off and surrenders to that Final Cough of Attained Pulmonary Freedom. I haven't had one of those in years, and non-asthma-savvy parents and wet noodles always misconstrue it as abuse.

"Yeah," I croak. "Wanna slap the fuck out of me?"

Walter rolls up his sleeves and puts on a fake Country Bumpkin accent. "'Til yer nice an' cleared up, boy," he says.

I hack up again. "This is why I'm such a stingy drinker, honestly..."

Sarah goes to work on the potatoes. "Focus on the high notes you'll be able to hit after this!"

Minutes later, I'm in this weird situation where Walt is beating the crap out of my exposed back - but I don't want him to stop. I'll be red as a tomato and maybe even bruised in one or two spots, but I'm finally getting rid of that wretched alveolar payload.

I try imagining this in the context of another dinner with our gay friends. "So anyway, Walt beat the shit out of me. It was awesome."

If awkwardness had a prize or an honorary mention, I'd probably earn one of those.

[fridgrave2-0]

dude you literally saved my life, now I understand a LOT

so, about russian education system. imo it's really simple, but my english can suck while I'm explaining it so feel free to ask questions

first of all, most of us start in kindergarten. from age 3 to 7 kids go to kindergarten, it's just a mass babysitting from 7am to 7pm, but kids also learn stuff like reading, counting and everything like that. there is a sleep time after lunch and game time outside on the territory. there are kids who skip kindergarten and learn basics at home with their parents, it's totally ok

when you are 7-8 yo, you go in the elementary school. you stay in this school for the next 11 years, and go in the same building. usually first and half of a second floor of the building is given to all elementary grades. we have four of them. usually for every grade we have two-three parallels with 20-30 kids in each parallel. every parallel has it's own letter like 1А 1Б 1В (numbers change with every grade, but letters stay. like in the fifth grade parallel Б would be called 5Б)

every parallel has it's own class supervisor or idk how to call that. basically in the elementary school 90% of your lessons (or periods or classes or how do you call the amount of the studying time) you have with that class supervisor who also cares about you and works with the parents. you can have some different teachers (like foreign language teacher or PE), but most of your time you spend in your own classroom. if I remember correctly, the classes you have in elementary school are: math, russian, literature, the world around (basically it's the most simple stuff from geography physics biology and so on), music, art and one to pick: religion or secular ethics. also since my school was with deep french education, i was leaning french too.

usually you have 3-4 lessons per day in elementary school, so you go home around 1pm. one lesson is 45 minutes, the day starts at 9am. breaks are usually 10-20 min. also we mostly use quarters of the academic year

after four grades of elementary school at age 11-12 you are getting the whole package of a true school experience. now every lesson takes it's own classroom and it's own teacher. one of those teachers becomes your supervisor, they still work with the parents (and do all the museum theater graveyards (don't ask) funny stuff outside the school)

i think I need to point out what we don't choose anything we study in school. it may range from school to school, but we all have the same classes we take 'til the end of the school. those classes are: algebra, geometry, russian, literature, french (+english), history, social studies, geography, biology, physics, chemistry, PE, music/art, computer science, fundamentals of life safety, household (usually it's separated by gender like cooking-sewing for girls and carpentry-idk-some-weird-shit for boys but our parallels at least were doing all of it) and perhaps something else what I forgot. also we study for 6 day a week with sunday free, and we don't have any clubs. my parallel had a strong connections with the literature teacher, she was putting different plays on our little school stage, but it wasn't something what you could've just participate in. the "theater kids" were basically her favorites

our schedule works this way: usually you have a russian and/or literature & algebra and/or geometry every day. it's our main subjects what are also a part of a unified state exam (use or ЕГЭ on russian). i will talk about this exam later. for now, you have 6-7 classes per day (maybe 5-6 at saturday), you go home around 3pm. some kids have sections after school (it's basically everything from sports to extra lessons to prepare for the exams).

sometimes it happens when parallel looses a lot of students (they change school) that it became so small what it needs to be united with other parallels. it happened to me twice. i was in 6В (В is V on russian and it's our third letter in the alphabet) when we were separated and send to two first parallels. I chose 7A for my next year, and in our 10th grade we were united into one single parallel aka 10A

the thing is, the middle school is usually enough for people if they don't want to go in the university. the middle school is 5-9th grades, and then is high school — 10-11th grades. you can leave school and go to college after 9 years. all you need to do is pass a general state exam (gse or ОГЭ). it has two phased russian: verbal exam in the beginning/middle of the second semester and a writing exam with basic math in the end of an academic year. after that you get your certificate of middle basic degree (or education) and can go in college (for russian people college is a place where you can get a middle professional degree. it's not prestige or something)

or you can go in the high school. it's just two last grades, nothing different in classes, but in the end you pass your unified state exams, and this is where the fun begins. most of the student should choose their future profession when they are 16, because high school is mostly a preparation for the fucking USE which are known for being stupidly hard and have nothing to do with thing you've been studying since your 5th grade. so russian students have to speedrun the subjects they need for the universities in two years

when the high school ends, you pass your obligatory russian and basic math (unless your uni needs a complicated math) and other subjects of your choice. as I know, you can pass those exams even years after you graduated if you want to go in an university at your 30s or something. but even after graduating you get your certificate of the middle general degree and you can try yourself in many jobs from that point (if someone would want to give you a chance), but a good prestige job takes a high degree from uni (even if won't be used)

and I can't really tell anything about universities or colleges because I dropped it before I got my middle professional degree. anyway, I bet I made things sound more complicated than they actually are, sorry for that. ask me anything you want about it if you want more info <3

can someone describe me how american schools and education system works bc im almost 22, saw some media about usa high school but i still have to fcking clue what is happening there

and if you are interested i can tell you how russian schools work

[wheelsup]

please brace yourselves, i went on a big fic reading binge last night and i have recs queued to post once every hour today. it’s loving fic writers day today.

[twilghtkoo]

bf!haechan tiktok series

i hate all men...but when he..

pairings: bf!haechan x fem!reader

genre: fluff

warnings: none

i hate all men...but when he...

“come on,” he softly mumbled, picking up your tiny figure in his arms. taking you away from your desk that was filled with papers crumbled and scattered, your laptop that was close to dying from low battery, and empty cups of iced coffee.

you were so stressed out and had no motivation left, you found out this morning from your professor that you had failed your math exam, but because you’ve done so well in has class for the past year he is letting you retake it. the thing is, is that you’ve used up all your mental capacity to study for it the first time and you don’t know if you can cram in all that information into your brain for a second time.

you ended up at your desk all day long, trying to study for it. your boyfriend arrived at your place pretty late after his schedules, you guys usually call each other when you both wakeup but he didn’t receive a call from you, not even texts, so he wanted to check up on you.

but when he walked into your apartment and saw you, dried up tears down your reddened cheeks, eyes red, hair disheveled, his heart dropped. you looked so drained and tired, he knows you’ve been at that desk all day without taking care of yourself.

he carries you into the bathroom, setting you up on the counter. he rubs the outer part of your thighs before walking into your room and coming back with a change of clothes. he helps you take off your clothes, brushing out your hair softly.

he kisses the tiny tears that fall down your cheeks ever time you blinked. the silence between you both and just his presence was so comforting.

he fills up your tub with warm water til it reaches a good amount, he helps you get in. as soon as the warm water reached your shoulders, all your muscles relaxed.

your boyfriend washes your hair and helps you wash your body before it was time to come out. you managed to get dressed yourself and brush your teeth, he tells you to wait on the bed as he gets all your skin care stuff.

haechan returns shortly, climbing on the bed to sit behind you, you sitting between his legs. he brushes out your hair, brushing from the bottom up. he then moves you, so you both are facing each other, legs crisscrossed.

he applies your skin care stuff on your face, the amount of times he’s slept over at your place or vice versa, you guys always do your skin care routine together. so he knows what yours is.

once he’s done, he kisses your nose and then your forehead. he leaves to put everything back in the bathroom and to clean up. as you climbed inside your bed, your boyfriend goes inside your closet to take one of his shirts and shorts for bed.

you felt the bed dip beside you before his arms encased you. you turn your body around so your facing him.

“thank you.” you softly whispered, placing a kiss on his lips.

“of course bubs, i don’t wanna see you overworking yourself again.” he tells you.

you nod, nuzzling your head into the crook of his neck before sleep took you both.