#romantic dating apps like
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really wanna hook up but im shy and dating apps scare me :(
#advice is welcome /gen#i got tinder once and talked to one person for like 5 minutes and they were nice but i got scared and deleted my account and the apo#Cause like the idea of someone wanting to gauge if they want to be in a relationship with me like romantically and seriously FREAKS ME OUT#atleast when i dont know them well#for whatever reason someone flirting with me just cause they wanna fuck is more comfortable for me than like#romantic dating apps like#idk man#im a virgin and im sick of being scared of sex#thats why im trying to be more open about it#nsft
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maybe it’s partially exacerbated by my therapists multi session run of attempting to figure out what the fuck is wrong with me cos i haven’t dated anyone. and he doesn’t like my answer that dating would eat into my chilling and spending time with my friends time.
#he keeps BRINGING IT UP even though i don’t ever bring it up cos it’s not a big deal to me#like i was talking about a family issue and he was like OH do you think THATS why you’re not dating#BRO NO#i’m not dating because A) no one want me B) i hate dating apps and#C) and most importantly i’ve dedicated my life to chilling and spending time with my friends#AND NO IM NOT AROMANTIC OR ASEXUAL IM JUST NOT ALL CONSUMED BY THE DESIRE TO BE IN A ROMANTIC PARTNERSHIP#not that there’s anything wrong with that *seinfeld hand raise* but it’s not me#and he’s literally scratching his head about it#bro now you’re making ME stressed about it#like obviously i’ve had the self doubt my entire gay life but maybe that’s part of why it’s haunting me now#runaway scones
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Man, seeing all the valentines day decorations in stores n shit is just reminding me how much I fucking Hate valentines day
#speculation nation#negative/#it was the last normal day my dad was alive. he went to the hospital in the early am hours of the 15th and died early on the 17th#he liked bringing the daily papers with him in his lunchbox to work. the very last one that we found tucked inside was for the 14th.#i had a valentines day date planned for the evening of the 16th. canceled of course.#i wasnt too fond of the holiday even before last year. as a grey aro that struggles with these things i find it too saccharine and stifling#but now all i can think about when i see those decorations is the fact that he mightve drunk himself into organ failure that night#the final straw on the camel's back. it all came crumbling down.#wonder if i can end up with a romantic partner that doesnt care about valentines day. it's kind of the expectation if ur dating someone#to care about it. but i dont wanna. id rather just plug my ears and wish it all away.#wake me up when september ends and all that business. except it's february for me.#sigh. i swear im doing okay with the Grief Recovery and all that shit. but it's gonna get rougher again as it draws closer.#an anniversary. as remarkable and horrible as the first year since your father died.#need to lay off trying to join any dating apps until after this. given how quickly i succeeded in finding someone with the first try#i dont wanna be seeing anyone by the time that date rolls around. itd make me sick to try to celebrate valentines day this year.#who knows maybe ill crack open a cold one in his honor. as a fun little joke.
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Imagine:
an aro-centric friend-finding/qpr/dating/hookup/etc. app called "Cupid's Aro"
#I wish this was a real thing#just having a way to find other aro people who are looking for other aro people#want a queerplatonic relationship? cupid's aro#want more aro friends? cupid's aro#want to start or join a commune full of aros? cupid's aro#want to date without worrying too much about how your partner would feel about you being aro? cupid's aro#want to just have fun [wink wink nudge nudge] without worrying too much about it getting romantic? cupid's aro#want a dating app/adjacent app where you can highlight tertiary attractions? cupid's aro#want a dating app/adjacent app that caters to aromantic identities and experiences? cupid's aro#like. someone make this a thing#I just don't know how to make it real#aromanticism#aro-spec#arospec#aromantic spectrum#aromantic#aro#aromanticity
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concept of love: 🥰👍❤️✨️😍💖❤️🔥🥰🫶💕💘
reality of meeting new people and dating: 😬👎🙃🗑😵💫❌️🫣🫠⁉️💩😐🚫
#awful awful awful#every time i meet someone and decide to give them a chance it's always a mistake#dating is the worst but also i dont even date basically bc i almost never get that far tbh#maybe im just the pickiest person alive but i really don't think my standards are that high#yet it feels like i never meet anyone who fits my bare minimum requirements from a romantic partner#AND THEN the feelings are nonexistent#i knowwww im capable of love and yet maybe im incapable of love 😐#why does it feel like its so easy for everyone else#i feel like almost nobody even has to put effort into meeting new people and they just fall in love and end up happy#and i go to like social events and groups and places.....i joined two dating apps in the spring 🤡....for what#i wish i was more okay w being alone and i usually am but then i get lonely :(#like im so obsessed w the concept of love but but.......never gonna experience that tbh#this has been a shitpost#and that makes trying worse.....like better to not try and then not fail and feel pathetic for trying lmao#so it's either sabotage my own happiness by never trying or taking risks or sabotage myself by getting my hopes up for nothing repeatedly#instead of just being okay alone#anyway........am i insane or am i just 27......
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#i got myself a boyfriend#i am officially his girlfriend#actually obsessed with him#he is such a kind person 🥹#he introduced me to his closest friends last night too#and his best friend texted him afterwards and she was like 'I really like her' about me#i just#cant believe ive met him#(yes via dating app but we figured out that we vaguely came across each other before and would have crossed paths through other ways again#in the future)#so we're like f a t e#hes also taller than me by like an ich or two#which i like so much bc ik already 6'1/186cm#i am so stupidly happy with him#personal#i cant believe me going out and being 'I'm gonna get myself a romantic partner to be in a relationship with' actually fucking workedddd#he is my first relationship#🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹
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not to get too existential on main or anything but like. maybe there isn’t someone for everyone, romantically speaking. maybe some of us are just meant to be alone. because just the thought of having to date people, having to open up/alter your home and your life for someone else in the name of romantic partnership seems so exhausting to me, especially after trying for so long and constantly being let down in one way or another. i have gotten to the point in life where i am SO happy being alone. do i sometimes crave intimacy like any other human being? sure. but my peace doesn’t feel worth sacrificing to maybe find someone i can tolerate most of the time.
#much to think about#and for the record I feel like I may fall somewhere on the ace spectrum so sex isn’t really even an issue for me#like I could go the rest of my life without having sex with someone and it really wouldn’t bother me#also as an otherwise heterosexual cisgender woman my prospects on men are just… Not Great#also I should mention I am not aromantic#I am very much romantic actually#but I just feel like I’ll be alone forever because I refuse to settle#and I also refuse to use dating apps and that is unfortunately where most people my age range in their late 20s/early 30s meet people#and I think they are dumb and I don’t want to do that#plus I am vehemently childfree so there goes a lot of men lol but ones I wouldn’t be interested in anyways
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I'm gonna be honest. I want a fwb who is chill with sometimes just getting super stoned, eating junk food and just cuddling while we watch cooking shows.
I can't cook all that well but I'm 100% that person who sits there and tries to direct what they're doing from the couch. 😆
#My last partner was ace so we could be romantically involved and just chill but I desperately want a chill cuddle buddy.#We have great taste in snacks and movies too. predominantly horror but ya know...#Personal#Just wish I wasn't so bad with dating apps. ugh.#Also someone who appreciates neck nuzzling and the occasional nibble because I am like my cat.
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ik most people on this website love to complain about dating and apps or whatever being like awkward or forced relationships and that can be true, like dating is for sure awkward, especially app dating, but also??? hot take i think it's fun. getting to know someone and discovering that u like them is fun. god knows ive been on plenty of shitty dates but when you go on one and it goes well?? you get the first date banter going??? and then you come home excited about where it's gonna go??? that's fucking amazing im sorry, i just can't relate to anyone who says they hate dating as a concept
#to be fair i am on a break from doing it rn because i was a lil exhausted#but i just had a string of bad luck and i need some time to myself (or at least off of dating apps specifically bc yikes)#doesn't mean i hate the concept entirely#i feel like dating (even when it's not serious and never gets serious) has led me to some rly interesting experiences in my life#at this point i feel like i should clarify like. obviously if u don't enjoy romance then u shouldn't date lol#but this isn't addressed to people who simply have no desire to date#im talking about people who do want a romantic relationship but constantly complain about dating#and it's like i mean. u might get lucky and find someone another way#but i also don't think dating sucks...... i think it just requires being open minded and able to brush things off easily#bri babbles
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You ever feel like you'll never find romantic love in your life
#cookie talks#just. thinking about how my older brother is married and my older sister is engaged#and how my longest relationship was like. 5 months and half of that time was spent long distance bc covid lockdown happened#like. that was 4 years ago. fuck.#and my relationship before that was maybe a month and a half#i just. idk man. ive had like. crushes and stuff and ive tried dating apps occasionally but nothing has ever stuck#and i do love my friends and appreciate them and platonic love is amazing. but sometimes. sometimes i want romantic love too.#it doesn't help that i have the whole 'i want to move out of the country' thing looming over my head so i feel guilty for wanting a#romantic interest bc of the complications that would bring. i feel like im not allowed to have any until after that happens
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#me#personal#want to meet new people#not sure how though#don’t want to try dating apps either#I feel like they don’t have what I’m looking for#honestly looking for friendships but a romantic relationship would be nice too#lol
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had to block the op of that "dating apps dont get it i wanna have a crush" post bc it made me so mad
#the perspective of people who have not used dating apps much at all honestly!#my ex and i met on bumble#we then had a wicked months long slow burn that largely took place over text#bc we were both too shy to do anything more than friendly in person#we're still super close bc we started from a base of friendship#but regardless#my current gf? i refused to let myself acknowledge romantic feelings for her#bc she had a complicated situation and i was scared of getting hurt#literally did not let myself fall for her til she moved in with me#and we also met on bumble#like#the only information the dating app gives you is#'this person most likely thinks im cute'#that's barely anything!#you can go a million places with that#and i have absolutely had unrequited crushes thru dating apps#or requited ones that took ages to develop (like that ex)#its just. its just a form of meeting people. thats it.
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bisexuality update! today i was getting ice cream and a guy walked in. extremely short, and looked like the type of guy who regularly yells at another guy on the streets of hoboken outside of the local deli about the yankees. and i thought you know what actually i might want to fuck him. !!!!!!!
#this is fucking progress i think yeah????? like the first real life man ive ever encountered who i can recognize im attracted to! woo hoo!#if i’d have matched w him on a dating app i absolutely would have met up with him at a dunkin or smth! i cannot see myself romantically with#him or men in general and i don’t think that will ever change but like dude i want to take that man’s virginity with a neon pink strap and b#e his big spoon when it’s over while we watch cake boss or some shit on the tv. i sneak out as he’s drifting off and he doesn’t see me again#until we’re fucking again; maybe he’s in charge this time at least at first but once i get my mouth on him he gets all babygirl-ified and i#lay him down and take care of him….#this is hilarious and i’m high key very happy for myself bc like dude i know i have so much internalized biphobia so being able to recognize#that i’m attracted to him????? fuck yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!#i want to take this man’s virginity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Listening to people talk about how they get matches on dating apps and compliments from people but “they’re just so ugly :(“. Or people with an active love life talk about how they’re the person nobody notices, the person who doesn’t get dates or romantic attention ect. creates such a pit in my stomach. I feel ill.
#vent tw#ill ill ill#I know it’s my own fault. I don’t put myself in situations where I could meet somebody. I don’t like the thought of dating apps.#and in the end even if I like the thought of a romantic relationship. would that even be a good idea right now#but still it makes me feel so. hopeless.#I don’t feel unattractive or unlovable#I feel nonexistent#I feel like a ghost#I am by definition a background character#in some way it’s probably a good thing#I don’t get harassed or bothered while I’m out. I just do my own thing and people leave me alone#but when I go out with others I am always the least interesting person there#strangers will strike up conversations with my friends but there is no reason to even acknowledge me#I’ve added ghost to my cycle of things#sometimes I feel like a vampire. sometimes an alien. and lately. a ghost
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anyway i clowned too close to the sun
#op#im sooo scared of leading ppl on or something.......#i have no clue whats normal with dating ive gone on like 2 dates with this guy and im talking to a woman as well and im like#is that morally incorrect#im leaning towards no hence me still being here but it feels strange but i also dont know whats normal#and whats allowed#guy & i havent discussed anything or done anything romantic/sexual yet#aside from . the dates but those were really just like friend vibes#the girl i just established with that we're both looking for romantic/sexual relationship#but also i met them both on a dating app so like#i think at this point its not anything yet but it could become an issue in the future#if anyone has thoughts. pls let me know#yay or nay . slay or nay#this is like a fun gameshow its like is! faulkner! being! unethical!
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my mom : damn you have two partners. could never be me.
also my mom : *hooked up with every man alive*
#it's so funny#men love her so much it's hilarious#she's on a dating app and sometimes shows me the guys she matches w/ bc funny#and last time a kid MY age like 19 was like hey :) and I LOST IT#it's SO FUNNY#my mom chilling on her dating app :#dude the age of her kid : hi ma'am 😘#like my mom's à cougar but NOT THAT MUCH LMFAO#forever funny to me#btw. I know that hookups and romantic partners aren't the same. but yknow#clearly if she wanted she could get a fucking harem
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