#roach is a goat

[kirchefuchs]

I finally got around to watching Starship for the first time a week or so ago, and Bug has been on my mind a lot since. So I may have filled up a sketchbook page mostly with doodles of him :) (with some added bonus Roach and goat Ted)

[lobotomy-jpeg]

Goats :)

[id: Digital sketch of Roach and Izzy from OFMD. This is a modern au. They're both smiling, holding a baby goat each. Izzy is holding a little brown and black goat and Roach is holding a white one, and their faces are touching. Both Roach and Izzy are dressed warmly. /end id]

[kikueatgoo]

woah mama !! goth goat girl !! 🖤🐐

(՞っ ̫ _՞)ᐝ they're available on toyhouse for purchase / trade.

[space-r0ach]

HEAR ME OUT- WHAT IF THE GOAT WAS JUST ON OF NARINDERS OLD VESSELS? JUST REVIVED SOMEHOW??

Im GOINGF INSANE OVER THEM

[halsins-herbal-underpants]

man I wish I knew more about the Witcher bc I seriously legit super want to write a Geralt x Halsin fic I could read the books and read synopsis of the games I suppose but like....research....

[charlott2n]

the temple of online teens to thirty somethings who listen to swans and natural snow buildings and the microphones and black midi and car seat headrest and coil and daughters and duster and godspeed you black emperor and have a nice life and neutral milk hotel and sigur ros and songs ohia and xiu xiu and animal collective and aphex twin and my bloody valentine and the velvet underground and talking heads and kate bush and joanna newsom and nick drake and captain beefheart and fishmans and the residents and les rallizes denudes and the smiths and the gerogerigegege and kero kero bonito and death grips and bjork and stereolab and radiohead and kanye west and slint and slowdive and cocteau twins and nas and a tribe called quest and elliott smith and television and pixies and sonic youth and dinosaur junior and the strokes and pharoah sanders and talk talk and black country new road and sufjan stevens and ajj and jeff buckley and sweet trip and leonard cohen and frank zappa and depeche mode and the clash and the stooges and unwound and tom waits and boards of canada and fiona apple and arcade fire and brian eno and boris and merzbow and sunn 0))) and melvins and ween and mount eerie and portishead and lcd soundsystem and wilco and big thief and pavement and kraftwerk and candy claws and yes and gang of four and sun kil moon and sun ra and burzum and death in june and current 93 and nurse with wound and psychic tv and this heat and wire and nick cave and bob dylan and the dismemberment plan and grouper and the brave little abacus and herbie hancock and beach house and patti smith and charles mingus and fugazi and minutemen and american football and yo la tengo and boredoms and wipers and the mars volta and fleet foxes and oasis and pulp and big star and sophie and flying lotus and the flaming lips and thundercat and mf doom and weezer and stars of the lid and jeff rosenstock and red house painters and tim hecker and steve reich and david bowie and lou reed and nico and jpegmafia and danny brown and husker du and misfits and r.e.m. and the replacements and soft machine and van der graaf generator and scott walker and philip glass and pj harvey and low and big black and new order and magdalena bay and steve roach and neu and can and magma and spiritualized and mort garson and henry cow and john zorn and faust and ornette coleman and xtc and the books and oneohtrix point never and nujabes and de la soul and rush and king gizzard and the lizard wizard and the cure and capn jazz and mitski and lana del rey and weyes blood and bon iver and giles corey and silver jews and the mountain goats and clipping and machine girl and deaths dynamic shroud Has just fallen into the ocean. ssorry

[lay-z]

I'm sorry, but this is so self-indulgent, it hurts. I've been thinking about it since it happened...So, here goes nothing. Also, this took a turn while I wrote it, because I have no control over myself and usually change plotlines mid-writing. MINORS, DNI - 18+ only !!! Pairing: f!reader x John 'Soap' MacTavish Warnings/Info: German reader 🇩🇪; trash talk; banter; cussing; Scottish slang (I feel like that should count as a warning...); German language; fuckbuddies to lovers; sexual tension; explicit smut; unprotected sex; some jealousy; dom!Soap; fluff

“Ach, ye gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me, lass!" Soap scoffs loudly as soon as he sees you swagger in to the private 141 rec room inside the HQ with a smug smile on your lips and that popular pink football jersey of the German national team adorning your body. 

Soap is wearing his new cobalt blue Scotland jersey himself; fabric straining around his bulging biceps, stretching over his broad chest, and fitting snugly around his narrow waist like a second skin, because he's bought it a size too small on purpose.  

Captain Price and Gaz are both showing off their support and colours by wearing their white England jerseys, naturally, while Ghost doesn't seem to care much because 'our bloody team isn't playing tonight anyways'. Keegan is wearing a vintage looking Portugal jersey, because 'Cristiano is still the fucking goat', and Roach is just happy to be there, really. He's more into American football, but he doesn't dare to speak that thought out loud tonight. 

The atmosphere is light-hearted, riddled with boisterous laughter, crude banter and the smells of Price's cigar smoke, savoury snacks, hefty beer and hard liquor, while the group is gathered around the sofa in front of the large flat TV screen mounted on the wall, either sitting on its plush cushions or on one of the office chairs borrowed from one of the nearby meeting rooms.  

Tensions are high, especially between you and Soap as the group waits for the preliminary reporting and interviews to end and the match to finally begin. 

Germany vs. Scotland, the first opening match for this year's European Football Championship tournament. 

Soap chokes up during Scotland's national anthem, overwhelmed by the sheer pride his fellow countrymen display in the stadium in Munich, while you merely stand with your hand over your heart as the German national anthem is sung next – singing your own national anthem and showing any kind of patriotism for your country, always makes you feel weird somehow; many thanks to inherited generational shame.  

Still, you feel a tiny bit of pride as you witness your own compatriots sing the anthem just as noisily as the Scots. 

"That a rare smile I spy on yer lips, lassie?" Soap teases after the anthems are finished, nudging his elbow against your upper arm while he's holding a bottle of beer in his hand. He loves to tease you with stereotypes that don't even apply to you most times, but he does it, nonetheless.  

"Ye like how yer fellow Krauts have shown some pride in their country, eh?" He snickers, earning a sharp, scolding glare from Captain Price.  

"Careful, MacTavish," the Captain chides from his chair next to the couch, his voice muffled by the cigar he's currently chewing on, while the others chuckle and snort among each other, "Keep the bloody banter above the belt, son."  

However, you simply click your tongue and roll your eyes at him as Soap continues to grin at you. Both of you know that he doesn't mean any menace by it, and you've said way worse stuff to each other in the past anyway – all in the name of good-natured, friendly banter, of course. Besides, you live for the constant banter and bickering between you two. It's pretty much the main foundation of your friendship, and what inevitably lead to your affair.  

"Very proud of my Krauts, yeah," you retort eventually, completely unfazed by the "slur", poking his large biceps with your forefinger harshly as you shoot him a mock glare, "I'll be even prouder when our team has completely annihilated yours, Scotch." 

Soap's chest rumbles with a low grunt at your name calling, and he loves how you defy him easily, as he lets his dark blue eyes roam over your figure appreciatively. He notices how the fabric of your jersey clings to your upper body, accentuating your delicious curves and ample chest, and how the thin collar hugs your pretty neck, making him want to wrap his hand around your throat just like he did last night. 

Gaz chuckles at your comment and even Ghost snorts quietly behind his balaclava, while Soap narrows his eyes at you playfully, now towering as he takes one more step towards you; close enough for you to tilt your head back slightly to keep eye contact with him.  

Gods, you love how tall he is compared to you; how he could easily bend you to his will if he wanted to. 

Soap notices how your pupils dilate as you hold his gaze fiercely and he can already feel his blood heat up in his veins with excitement, rushing south. He clenches his jaw as you bat your eyelashes up at him with that bratty smirk of yours and his fingers tighten around the cold beer bottle in his hand, the other one stuffed into the pocket of his jeans, to keep himself from grabbing and bending you over the couch in front of everyone, including your superiors.  

The tension between you two is becoming more noticeable to everyone present now, all thick and palpable.  

"Is – is that behaviour considered normal for them?" Roach enquires in a hushed whisper as he leans in to speak to the other men, shoving another handful of salted and roasted peanuts into his mouth while his eyes flicker back and forth between you and Soap. He's more interested in whatever is going on between the two Sergeants than the goddamn soccer game on TV. 

Keegan simply nods with an affirming hum as he lifts the rim of his beer bottle to his lips, eyes glued to the TV, while Gaz answers verbally, also not taking his eyes off the screen. 

"Aye," the latter confirms, "Just ignore them, Sanderson. We don't interfere, unless they get physical. Right, Captain?" 

The older male nods firmly in return, his face a mask of seriousness as he watches the kick-off with intrigue, taking a slow sip of his glass of bourbon. 

"And even then, only if it's not sexual." Ghost adds gruffly, though one can practically hear that he's smirking beneath his mask. The Lieutenant has never said it out loud yet, but he is very much aware of the thing that has been going on between his Sergeant's for a while now.  

Soap manages to stay cocky after the first two goals for the German soccer team, despite his teammates and, especially, your teasing. The third one, a penalty goal, makes him break out in a sweat with both anger and devastation, all hope for a win now gone at once.  

The Germans don't stop there, though. 

You're tugging at Soap's arm, his jersey, jumping up and down like some excited bunny, laughing and cheering hysterically after having had a few drinks at this point, celebrating with the rest of the team, while the Scotsman looks on with a sour, stony expression.  

He doesn't even know when everyone else suddenly became a fan of the goddamn Germans, all he knows is that his team is losing, and he's currently outnumbered by impostors. Creepin' Jesus, even Roach is cheering for them! He should've known better than to watch the bloody game with you and the lads. 

"Aw, come on, Soapey!" You coo at him condescendingly, grinning widely as he crosses his arms in front of his chest with a huff, rolling his shoulders coolly as if he's not incredibly vexed, "Are you not enjoying the game, huh?" 

"Ach," he scoffs, shrugging off your hand from his shoulder like a petulant child, "Away an bile yer heid." 

"English, MacTavish!" Ghost scolds from his seat on the couch, having heard the insult despite the noise in the room, and you can see how badly Soap wants to flip the Lieutenant off.  

"Ah, ah, ah, Johnny," you butt in a with a smug tone to your voice, "Be nice now. Your boys can still win thi–" 

Your voice is cut off by loud cheering as Germany scores their fourth goal. 

"Fuckin' sore winner, hen," Soap grunts as he bullies his cock deeper into your quivering cunt; right up to the hilt, stretching your velvety walls and hitting your g-spot repeatedly while you're burying your face into the soft pillows on the mattress beneath you, muffling your desperate noises as you take his fat cock like the good little bonnie you usually are behind closed doors. 

In this position, he has the best view on your delicious curves and soft skin, now adorned with his deep blue Scotland jersey after he’d swiftly pulled the German one off you once you were in your bedroom; the fabric now rucked up to your shoulder blades, one hand of his fisting the stretchy fabric tightly to keep you exposed. 

"Teasin' me all fuckin’ night," he huffs through gritted teeth as his blunt nails dig into your skin, tightening his grip around the fat on your hips with his other hand, so you can't escape him, "Over some fuckin' football game." 

While Soap rolls and thrusts his hips in a steady, brutal rhythm, positioned between his spread knees behind you, you're grabbing fistfuls of your blanket as you moan and whimper helplessly, dampening the white sheets with your drool, taking everything he's giving you in retaliation to your bratty behaviour back at the rec room. 

Soap had immediately grabbed a tight hold of your wrist and pulled you out of the room, towards the 141 quarters, as soon as the final whistle had rung out, ending the match with a terrible loss for Scotland. He didn’t bear to stand a minute longer to listen to his and your teammates mockery, and he didn’t care about the confused looks everyone, except Ghost, were shooting you and him as you’d left together. 

He doesn’t care much anymore that Scotland lost to Germany – 5:1; it just so happens to be the perfect excuse to completely wreck you tonight, and Soap keeps telling himself that it’s not at all because he’s witnessed Keegan getting friendly with you over the past few times the team went out to the pub on base. You two might not be official, but you’re still his – and his only.

His friend, his fuckbuddy, his lover.

"You're jus'.... mad they– a-ah~" You slur, but your words are cut off by another pathetic moan that is ripped from your throat when Soap grabs you by the nape of your neck suddenly, like a dog would grab her puppies, squeezing your flesh and muscle with his calloused hand to keep you in place, then pulls his thick cock out up to its angry-red tip only to pound back into you with determined fervour to finally shut you up for good. 

No, Soap is not mad about the bloody game – he’s mad that you’d spent halftime sitting on Keegan’s lap like an obedient puppy when the latter had asked you to take a seat, because the chairs were taken and Ghost took up most space on the sofa – and Soap was too proud to tell you to sit on his lap instead.

The bed rocks and creaks under your combined weight, hitting the wall repeatedly with a very telling “thudthudthudthud–” for your surrounding neighbours, your teammates, while the warm glow of your bedside lamp casts a lewd shadow of your current activity on the white walls of your bedroom. Fuck, Soap hopes Keegan can hear you two going at it in his apartment.

“What was that, bonnie? Ye said sum’?” the Scotsman grits out mockingly, biting his lower lip, nostrils flaring with exerted breaths as he squeezes your neck tighter, forcing you to arch your back and your pretty ass up into him as he pounds into you; skin slapping skin as his balls tap against your clit with each deep and rapid thrust. 

Meanwhile, you don’t even register his teasing words anymore as you’re fully focused on the mind-blowing pleasure Soap is giving you; hard and dominating and the opposite of how the usually treats you during sex.  

Your eyes roll back, toes curling as the tension of your impending climax begins to build up, up, up then; heat blossoming in your lower abdomen as he keeps pushing you towards the edge with each delightful rock of his powerful hips and his girthy cock ramming into your sweet spot.  

However, Soap knows those sounds you’re making all too well already; the way you’re breathing pattern changes, the higher pitch of your wanton moans and sweet cries of pleasure, the way your walls begin to clench harder around his thick length, practically sucking him in deeper into your silky heat – he can read all the signs like the bloody morning paper, knows you’re about to cum on his dick... 

And despite his own pleasure licking and tingling at his lower spine, making his burly muscles tense and twitch and his balls tighten with the inevitable – he stops his movements at once, ruins both your orgasms, and pulls his throbbing cock from your soppy, warm cunt. Glancing down briefly, Soap sees his bare cock glistening with your slick, creamy arousal and his pearly pre-cum gathering at the base of his cock, and the sight makes him shudder and groan with excitement. 

He can’t have you cum like this tonight, though, fucking you doggy – Gods, no. Soap needs to watch you fall apart on his cock, needs to see your gorgeous features contort in pleasure and your reaction when he spills his thick load into you for the very first time without anything holding him back and separating him from you – knowing he’s the only one able to have you like this.

“Up,” he grunts out next, simultaneously pulling you upwards by your neck while he feels your rapidly fluttering pulse under his fingertips, until your back is flush with his sweat-slicked and bare, heaving chest while his rock hard cock rubs and pokes along your ass cheeks, “Gimme yer mouth.”  

Cranking your neck towards him obediently, Soap reaches out and cups the side of your jawline to angle your face to his liking, capturing your mouth in a sloppy kiss and swiftly plunging his hot tongue past your lips. Your eyes flutter shut as you moan into his mouth while his other large hand snakes around your body, slipping beneath his jersey you’re wearing, cupping and groping your plump tits greedily, pinching your stiff nipples with the rough pads of his thumb and forefinger.

Soap goes on to shift and manhandle you into a different position and you gladly let him. 

He pushes you down onto your back, smirking to himself when you spread your legs for him all too eagerly, making grabby hands with a frustrated pout to have him on top of you again – it’s adorable, really, and he appreciates the view of your pussy, all puffy and wet for him, before he nestles himself between your thighs – the place that has easily become his favourite over the past few months.

 “Yer such a brat,” Soap chuckles darkly as he grabs one of your legs by your calf to hike it up over his broad shoulder, then the other, before he spits into his palm and gives his cock a few good pumps with his fist, tapping and rubbing the swollen tip on your sensitive clit teasingly until you let out a needy whine, one hand of yours reaching up to hold on to the back of his neck, tugging at his short Mohawk.

You’re his brat, though. Emphasis on his.

“And you’re such an ass tonight, Johnny,” you mewl in return and suck in a breath when Soap aligns his thick tip with your slick hole, pushing in halfway with one languid thrust and leaving you both breathless again. 

“’m not an arse,” he objects with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he watches you bite your lower lip raw to keep your lewd noises at bay, “Ye just have a way of drivin’ me doolally, hen.” He counters, and then leans in to crash your lips together once more, folding your legs up even further while his cock sinks into your cunt fully, followed by a guttural moan of his when he feels your walls clench and tighten around him, squeezing him until his muscles tremble with restraint.

He groans against your lips; the feeling of your throbbing heat and the taste of your soft tongue flicking and lapping against his is nearly enough to make him cum on the spot. It’s almost like he can feel your heartbeat through your snug, perfect pussy, and it nearly drives him to the brink of madness each time you let him fuck you.

“You can’t say shit like doolally and not expect me to laugh,” you snicker softly, nipping at his lower lip as you lock eyes with him, batting your eyelashes, “Sounds fucking ridiculous.” 

Soap grins in return and continues his deep, deliberate thrusts into your delicious cunt. His heart always flutters giddily whenever you gaze into his eyes with that cheeky look of yours, especially when his cock is buried to the hilt inside you, stretching you out with every inch he has to offer.

“Say some in German then,” he croons lowly, nudging his nose below your chin to make you tilt your head up to give him better access to your neck before he begins peppering wet, hot kisses along your pulse point, sucking a purple love bite into your creamy skin to mark you up. “I wanna laugh, too,” he grumbles between nips and pecks. 

You click your tongue in mock annoyance, enjoying his ministrations and the way his beard tickles your skin too much to be mad at his teasing, and you tug on his short hair a little harder before raking your nails over his scalp until he purrs against your skin in pure bliss. Soap can feel how you swallow hard as he licks a long stripe from your collarbone up your throat, then your walls clench tightly around his cock and he grits his teeth as another pleasant shudder runs down his spine.  

“Say. Sum’. To. Me. Lass.” He demands, this time punctuating each word with a sudden deep and sharp rock of his hips that makes the bed’s headboard hit the wall again. 

Your eyes flutter shut with a breathy moan and your brain short-circuits while each of his thrusts makes a jolt of hot searing pleasure shoot right into your core, making your spine tingle and your body tense with bliss. 

“Ich liebe dich,” you blurt out unintentionally instead of an insult, your speech slurred and unintelligible as he presses his weight further into you, knocking the breath out of your lungs in this position. Your eyes widen as soon as you realize what you’ve just confessed and you pray he didn’t understand that. 

Soap doesn’t speak German, but those words do sound familiar. 

His stomach tightens, his heart skips a heavy beat while his mind begins to race, and his rhythm falters momentarily before he picks up his pace again, fucking into you fast, deep and thoroughly to drown out the sudden wave of foreign emotions on the brink of overwhelming him. 

“Again,” he demands against your ear, gripping your body tightly and keeping you in place on the mattress as he ruts into your cunt with newfound vigor and goad, his pelvis stimulating your clit with each sharp snap of his hips.

“Say –“ He gets a hold of your jaw, curling his large hand around it to make you look at him while he grits his teeth, huffing like some feral bull. “– that again.”

Reaching one hand out behind you, you brace your flat palm against the headboard while your other hand keeps holding on to the back of his neck, fingernails digging into thick muscle and skin as you cling onto him desperately.

“F-fuck, Johnny!” You cry out. “Ich liebe dich, du Vollidiot!” you repeat in between breathy, high-pitched moans, though more confident this time, before your eyes roll back in pleasure with another loud moan of his given name.

Soap can barely keep it together then. His heart nearly bursts out of his chest and his jaw clenches so hard, the veins in his neck start protruding and fluttering with his rapid pulse as he feels you come apart around his cock; your tight, soppy walls convulsing and clenching, pushing and coaxing him to his own sudden release.

And he lets go of your jaw, clutches the pillow next to your head tightly as he buries his face into the crook of your neck, groaning and moaning shamelessly as his body seizes up, balls tightening almost painfully before he spends his thick cum into your perfect cunt.

You wince and exhale a hiss when Soap leans back to look at you and lowers your legs at last, letting you stretch out your sore muscles while he stays buried inside you, moving his hips almost lazily and caressing your burning leg muscles soothingly while both your bodies keep twitching and shaking with small aftershocks. You can feel his warm cum and your own wetness leaking and dripping down your ass crack, ruining your bed sheets below – and you remember that you did actually let him fuck you raw this time in a fit of frivolity.

Your blurry vision becomes clear again once you blink away the haziness and then you already feel Soap’s calloused fingers tracing your jawline, his deep blue eyes drinking in your gorgeous, flushed features almost reverently.

“What?” You ask defensively, looking up at his ruggedly handsome face, now squirming under his uncharacteristically tender gaze and the feeling of his softening cock still resting all snug inside your cunt, acting as if you haven’t just professed your love to him, after weeks of dancing around the topic.

“Well,” he begins, clearing his throat after another beat of awkward silence as he can feel his cheeks begin to heat up with a burning blush,

“Ye cannae finally confess ye love me an’ not expect me ta combust, luv.”

[cherie-doll]

𓆩♡𓆪 Headcanon: Convincing Them To Get A Pet

⊱⊰ Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Phillip Graves, Keegan, Hesh Walker, Logan Walker, König, Horangi, Nikto

Price

You kept bringing stray cats home

Every time you walk through the door, hands buried in the pockets of your tightly wrapped coat, John turns his head and asks "What've you got in there?"

"I don't know what you're talking about" and a meow can be heard coming from inside your coat

He makes you take it off to find a cat and her kittens snug and warm in the inner pockets

"They were cold..." you say sheepishly when he sighs

Ghost

He has to take care of you and now you want a pet??

Says he has enough on his plate with just you

You’re blowing up his phone sending him videos of animals or shoving the phone in his face

“Simon, Simon! Look at this! We should totally get one.”

“…That’s a spider. Why would you want that?”

Soap

He had also been wanting a pet for some time now, he had an exotic animal in mind until you got chickens

"...Are we going to eat it?"

"Johnny, no."

Now he has to wake up early and feed them every day when the sun rises to when the sun goes down

The chickens have grown on him and he's even named them, gets upset when you or someone jokes about eating them

Gaz

Is totally fine with any pet as long as it’s nothing too out of the ordinary, so you got bunnies

You'll let them roam around the house sometimes and Kyle hates when you do that because they tend to chew things and it's somehow always his things

Imagine Kyle falling asleep in your bed with the pink comforters and the adorable fluffy baby bunnies (yes i'm making a reference to that one tiktok)

Roach

Unfortunately for both of you, you are weak when it comes to animals

You’re both fawning over the cats and dogs in the animal shelter, cuddling with the baby goats at the local farm even if they’re chewing your clothes and head butting you

Together you’ve owned your weird assortment of pets; ducks, goats, spiders, snakes etc.

I headcanon Gary is a nerd when it comes to snakes and bugs

Alejandro

In the moment, you manage to convince him pretty easily, until you actually bring home the dog you wanted

Pretends he doesn’t like petting it or getting near it

Even curses when he has to get up at night to let it out for it to use the bathroom

But ofc within a month he’s totally smitten over your pit bull

Spends money on buying it nice collars and food, taking it out for a drive in his truck frequently

When cooking on the grill he always buys extra meat just for your dog

Phillip Graves

I like to think he has a soft spot for animals and agreed to going along with you when deciding what animal to adopt

What he didn't expect was to be pulling into a ranch and looking at horses

He expected to be looking at dogs or cats or a fish even

Now he's helping you muck out the stall for the beautiful pinto you bought

Helps brush her down and keep its mane and tail smooth to enter it in shows and competitions

Keegan

He knew you'd been wanting a pet for a while now because every time you visited someone who owned a pet you'd asked if you could play or pet them

You probably spent longer bonding with animals than with humans

Decided to surprise you with a talking parrot

Every now and then he'll teach it cute phrases like "I love you", the parrot will sometimes pick up some colorful language from Keegan

Hesh Walker

He caved in and originally thought of gifting you a pretty Siamese cat before thinking he'd like to play a little prank on you

As a joke, he gave you two rats, each with a pink bow on them

David would've started laughing if it weren't for you growing attached to them, eventually he did tell you he intended to buy you a cat

The rats were quite intelligent and learned tricks fast and frequently played games so both you and David decided to keep them and forget about the original plan of getting a cat

Logan Walker

He could never say no to you

However, you had owned a dog before, Logan wasn't fond of cats and you didn't want something like a lizard or a fish that would stay inside a tank all the time

The perfect opportunity came up when you had the chance to adopt a baby cow, a calf who had lost its mother

You both agreed, there was extra unused backyard space

The calf was named "Moonpie"

König

You really wanted a pet, but König couldn't understand why

"We already have a pet"

It was an iguana, which König already owned when you moved in with him

You weren't very fond of it because of an anecdote that occurred the first time you were over at König's place; you had seen a long tail in between the couch cushions and thinking it was a stuffed animal or a toy you pull at it only to see the iguana moving

It still freaks you out to this day when you remember how flaky and weird the scales felt

Horangi

He agreed and suggested he be the one to go pick out a pet from the shelter

You stood at the door when you heard his car ready to meet your new pet only to be met with a plastic container

Upon opening the box you're shocked to see he brought home a snake, he just snickers as he picks it up, holding it as the boa wraps around his arm biceps

"You wanted a pet, didn't you?"

Nikto

You had spent months trying to convince him to get a pet, to which he kept saying no to

"Come on Andre, a dog wouldn't be as bad as a kid"

He had no reaction other than just a grunt, but next time he came home from deployment he set a portable crate down

You rushed excitedly when you heard squeals thinking it was a puppy, after three weeks you notice the brownish fur begin to lighten and spots appearing

"Where did you say you got the dog from?''

"Did I ever say it was a dog?"

Post inspired by this cutie:

Everyone say "Thank you Corazòn"

[femoso-seben]

Livestock AU

Where Cod characters are hybrids living on a farm -------------------

Price and Alejandro were raised together, as guardian livestock animals they were raised together. Alejandro is a Llama hybrid and is trained to attack dog-like creatures he guards over the sheep. When Gaz the young border collie Hybrid was introduced he had to work with a very aggressive Llama that didn’t like his dog shape.

Ghost is a Kangal, like Price but much bigger. Ghost comes from a puppy mill and has to fight to get food. Very quiet dog unless intimidating the coyotes and wolves. Ghost learns quickly and tends to be the most independent but always comes back to check in with his fellow livestock dogs.

Soap is a Great Pyrenees who generally do anything required of him, mostly looking after the ducks, ducks, and goose. Very playful and young still learning the ropes but very good at his job does sleep during the day since he needs to be active at night. If he sees an unattended egg left over night will eat it.

Lastly is Gaz a border collie and very good at his job if he finds anyone miss behaving (most Soap sometimes Roach) he will bite them near the next to correct that behavior.

Laswell and Roach are both Barn cat hybrids. Laswell usually does all the recon missions and gets the boys to then check things out if she finds something suspicious. Roach is a rescue dumpster cat who survives being poisoned a few times. Very rambunctious and follows the guardian dogs around. Ghost is very fond of the silent cat, you will find Roach sneaking bites of Ghost dog food.

Lastly only recently added is an Alpaca. Rudy is situated with the Goats and as their alarm system acts like a less aggressive Alejandro. Alejandro and Rudy do see each other as packmates as well as their individual herd.

Nik is an old police dog who retired as a family dog, and will help out once in awhile when the urge to work hits him.

The livestock guardians’ main rival is a pack of wolves led by Graves. His shadow is a large pack of wolves that tries the farm every once in a while.

Another group is a group of Coyotes led by Valeria. She has gotten a few Birds from Soap which really upsets him.

The farm is currently being invaded by rats Led by Makarov and Laswell is trying her damnest to hunt him down, he and his Konni group are aggravating the farmer.

The farmer decided to get a few more barn cats.

Reader is a small kitten from another farm with too many cats they and their two friends, Farah a brownish cat hybrid, and Alex a big sandy color cat are added. Turns out Alex is the son of Laswell one of her litters.

Reader is treated like an eyesore by the older guardians until they are old enough to train, learn, and join the workforce. Reader mostly wonders around seeing each group and how they work, and finding their spot to rest in. Makarov once scared them and got scolded by Price. -------

It stupid idea idk was inspired a little by @tacticalanklebiter3000 and @frogchiro and the Hybrid side of Cod community

[callofdutydecor]

Okay but like I'm gonna do a little series-

Previously

Next

It's called 'Farmers Land'

It's about the men being the animal hybrids I think they would be

Aka

Captain John Price: The farmer, but with a twist (⁠๑⁠♡⁠⌓⁠♡⁠๑⁠) He would definitely be a bull Farmer!! And I don't mean he only takes care of the bulls, I mean he is one!! His feet are hooves, bull horns, and a bull tail!! (⁠๑⁠♡⁠⌓⁠♡⁠๑⁠)

Lieutenant Simon 'Ghost' Riley: Guard WolfDog hybrid!! It's hands and feet have lil beans(⁠〃ﾟ⁠3ﾟ⁠〃⁠) tail and ears galore(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠✧⁠*⁠。

Sergeant Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick: herding dog!!(⁠๑⁠♡⁠⌓⁠♡⁠๑⁠) I personally think he would be a Border Collie since they are(I think) 1/6 British herding doggies!!(⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡

Sergeant John/Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish: Of course like a cliche, another Gaurd dog!!(⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡ I feel like he would be a golden retriever!! And Like Simon he would have hand and feet beans, tail, and ears!!꒰⁠⑅⁠ᵕ⁠༚⁠ᵕ⁠꒱⁠˖⁠♡

Former Soviet Army Senior Sergeant Nikolai: Would be one of the bulls!!(⁠´⁠∩⁠｡⁠•⁠ ⁠ᵕ⁠ ⁠•⁠｡⁠∩⁠`⁠) He's so protective and gets along with the other animals so well!!♡⁠(⁠Ӧ⁠ｖ⁠Ӧ⁠｡⁠)

Commander Phillip Graves: A coyote!! (⁠♡⁠ω⁠♡⁠ ⁠)~ he's a wild coyote!! And is like Simon and ghost with his features!!(⁠~⁠￣⁠³⁠￣⁠)⁠~

Colonel Alejandro Vargas: I feel like he would be a Jaguar!!(⁠´⁠ε⁠｀⁠ ⁠) He is feral!! He can also purr and sometimes even meows!! (⁠♡⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠♡⁠)

Sergeant Major Rodolfo 'Rudy' Parra: I feel like he would be a cougar!! In a two man pack with Alejandro!!ෆ⁠╹⁠ ⁠.̮⁠ ⁠╹⁠ෆ he is also feral!!

Sergeant Gary 'Roach' Sanderson: I think he would be a farm animal, many a goat, ram, or pygmy, which I think is just the British ram- (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠)

Valeria 'El Sin Nombre' Garza: I think she would be a snake!!(⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠) Not just any snake tho!!(⁠ꏿ⁠﹏⁠ꏿ⁠;⁠) She would be a venomous jumping snake! Of course she's a wild snake!!(⁠●⁠´⁠⌓⁠`⁠●⁠)

Colonel König: A deer!!(⁠♡⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠♡⁠) But of course a German deer, so I think he would be close to a sika deer!!(⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠♡⁠) He's a wild deer and is in a two man pack with Horangi!!(⁠♡⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠)

Operator Kim 'Horangi' Hong-Jin: Tiger!!(⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠♡⁠ ⁠) But, like with könig, a Korean tiger, so a Siberian tiger!!(◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿⁠)

Vladimir Makarov: A wild Silver fox!!(⁠♡⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠♡⁠)

And finally

You: A kitty!! But not just any kitty! I wanna make sure my readers are the most beautiful kitty in the world!! So youz my lovies, are the Balinese cat!! So colorful and fluffy!!(⁠っ⁠˘⁠з⁠♡⁠(˘⁠⌣⁠˘⁠ ⁠)

I will make the first chapter soon!!

You can also find me on Wattpad!!

My account name is

EmmasDecor

[clovreat3r]

I agree how did you

Wip

BROOOOOOO WHAT WHY IS HE SO AWESOME HOW DID I GET OBSESSED WITH THAT THING

[dickfuckk]

Everything we know about s2 so far (plot-ish)

Pearl necklace + important addition

Spanish Jackie fights with Blackbeard

Roach is in a dinghy with other characters at some point

Roach is having “the best day ever” and it’s very relaxing. He’s with someone else by a stream

Roach and Fang paint their faces white

Lesbian pirates (one of them is called Archie)

Blackbeard? Possibly makes Archie fight her gf to the death?

Izzy most likely loses his foot

Izzy gets better/redemption arc? (16:30 min)

A character calling himself Prince Ricky will meet Stede

Lucius is most likely alive and 100% in the season

They trained a rat (but might have cut that scene)

The Revenge will most likely burn or blow up [x] (+ so much more)

There’s a torturer and he’s going all in with the torture

Stede becomes a man (28 min.)

There’s going to be a wedding [x]

This is the groom so most likely not someone from the crew getting married

Red flag/Chinese pirate crew

"Swampy town folk"

There will most likely be a cave scene (+ much more)

They’re most likely filming in real water for some scenes

Hornigold

Lighthouse scene

Jim will most likely be making out with someone

Alex Sherman has a cameo in it

Tight pants

New costumes (8:30 min) [x] - Wee John's new costume in particular should be great (45:50 min)

"Cool guest stars" (and most likely a Prince soundtrack)

Jim is going to be wearing crocs

Goat [x]

Stormy weather and ep9 sky?

Rory might be there (just bc she's unsure if she's allowed to mention him lmao)

More action than season 1 (53 min) [x] [x] [x] (+ much more)

8 episodes in total

The "dudes" will be dressed up as the British and sing Rule Britannia in powdered wigs

Timeskip

And of course my season 2 crew list

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana Mini-HCs: Brainrot's Masterlist, Pt 5

M6 and lunchables

MC gives M6 a drink called "gender fluid"

M6 when MC likes "kid's shows"

M6 making art

M6 on MC's trauma anniversary

When MC grew up on the docks

M6 playing instruments

M6 with a highschool crush

When MC has a shy familiar

When MC catches the bridal bouquet

M6 when MC breaks their hand and can't play games

M6 when their kid does the same dangerous stuff they did

When MC returns after a long trip

With a Clown!MC

MC has a spider familiar

M6 waking up to MC on the floor

MC breaks their bones because of a roach

M6 get turned into mythical creatures

M6 when MC clings to them like a koala

When MC's parent is cold and demanding

MC with chronic nightmares

M6 at a friend's wedding

Vesuvia Weekly: First (Platonic) Kiss

When MC has allergies

M6 forget to give their familiar a treat

M6 vs horrible goose

Werewolf MC

M6 and interior decorating

MC visiting the beginning of their route

MC wears clothes with M6's face

When MC sleeps like a vampire

M6 hear you say "I love you" while they're sleeping

MC moves the room onto the ceiling

Vesuvia Weekly (poorly doodled): M6 as mermaids

When M6 miss MC at work (poorly doodled)

Modern M6's jobs

When MC likes to be talked to sleep

When MC imitates M6

Styling MC's hair

M6 vs Mechanical Bull

M6 trying to make up

Adopt-a-goat with the M6

When MC's bad at remembering names

When MC's familiar is a little bit of a jerk

M6 helping MC mourn their Aunt

What M6 bring to show and tell

When MC and M6's relationship is forbidden

M6 being MC's lucky charm

MC is a Royal Guard

With a nocturnal familiar

When MC has alien antennas

M6's favorite IRL occasions

Things I associate with M6

MC with a lot of tattoos

Winged!MC hugging the M6

When MC floats in their sleep

With a gardener MC

M6 on laughing gas

M6 helping MC wash their hair

When MC is a deep sleeper

M6 when you give them the Djungelskog

Pride Month

When MC and M6 used to be rivals

Helping MC use trans tape

When MC is bad with money

When MC stays angry at Lucio

M6 when MC overuses their magic

M6 waiting for MC

When MC drops their phone in water

With a mind-reader MC

When MC knows lots of trivia

M6 sit in MC's lap

M6 with a gentlemanly MC

When MC plays otome games

M6 when MC is religious

When MC's accent slips out

When MC has eczema

Nighttime routines

When M6 turn into a small, wounded animal

MC with scoliosis

With a fox familiar

How M6 handle their crushes

M6 find a child with the same trauma as them

With a crybaby MC

When MC has narcolepsy

MC teaching M6 magic

When MC used to be royalty

With a very feminine MC

M6 with a randomly contorting MC

When MC has anxiety

Using poetry to compliment M6

Asking M6 "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

When MC has abandonment issues

When MC loves tea

Asking M6 to kiss it better

When MC has asthma

Visiting non-Vesuvian MC's home country

MC who uses shovels as a weapon

M6 when MC is covered in stitches and limps

When tourist!MC has to go home

[wearfinethingsalltoowell]

Remember when Stede brought Ed back with the power of love and remember when Oluwande got kissed by the pirate queen while doing little kicky legs and remember when Fang protected a goat from a torturer and remember when Edward Teach wore a cat bell and potato sack and remember when Roach made a giant cake for his friends who were upset and remember when Frenchie brought the crew together with a party for a made up holiday and remember

[cod-dump]

Roach after Ghost allows him to do something against regulations: I convinced him with my boyish charm

Gaz: More like you annoyed him to the point he would agree to anything to get you to leave him alone

Roach: What matters is that I get a pet goat, not how we got there

[thedemonofcat]

The name Roach is what Geralt gives to not just his horses but to every animal he has encountered.

There have been,

Goat Roach’s

Pig Roach’s

Chicken Roach’s

Cow Roach’s

Cat Roach’s

Dog Roach’s

Rabbit Roach’s

At this point, Jaskier is very glad that Geralt didnt meet Ciri and has a baby. Otherwise, the poor girl's name would have been Roach