#really relatable im sure
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sin eater
#sorry its been a minute!!! the horrors. you understand.#anyways yall ready for another gloom tag essay because here we go!!!#im constantly thinking about the ramifications of uzi literally eating cyn and her now being apart of her.#specifically how it impacts uzi mentally. like dgmw i LOVE the silly cyntail shenanigans in fanart (ive also contributed to this) however#when i really think about it in relation to uzi's arc i go crazy insane#uzi is a character who is grasping for control after a lifetime of not having it.#she has no control over how her peers treat her. she has no control over khan neglecting her for reasons that arent her fault.#she quite literally has no control over the solver taking her over and making her do monstrous things against her will#which solidifies her feelings of being a freak monster who everyone was right to outcast and mistreat.#because im Unwell i interpret her calling herself god as a way to convince herself of having control- and to lock away feelings of impurity#if anyone is in control- if anyone is loved and cherished despite any and all wrong doings- its a god.#and that all comes to a head when she eats the heart of cyn thereby destroying the AS- a literal manifestation of a corrupted god- for good#finally taking back control from the entity that had been terrorizing and traumatizing both her and her loved ones. but did she really?#cyn is apart of her now. powerless sure- but that doesnt take away the horrors she wrought previously#and even so- has uzi ever stopped being just a host? do you think shes terrified of cyn regaining power out of the blue?#do you think uzi ever stops feeling like a monster?#“sin eating” was a thing that happened where someone would consume ritual foods to take on the sins of a recently deceased person#thus absolving said deceased person of any sins and putting them onto the sin eater. being a sin eater ensured eternal damnation.#and i just think about that a lot. when applying that (symbolically ofc(somewhat literally. she very much is a cyn eater)) to what uzi did.#“gloom you're reading way too much into this” THE LITTLE GOTH ROBOT. MAKES ME INSANE IN THE HEAD. OK!!!!!#gloom.art#murder drones#murder drones fanart#murder drones uzi#uzi murder drones#uzi doorman#uzi md#md uzi#uzi fanart
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Elendil makes this genre of face whenever he's mildly perturbed. Peeved. Perplexed. His flabbers gasted
#personal faves are the middle + bottom right + middle 2 on the left (which are all coincidentally related to Isildur being a menace)#Lloyd said in an interview that Isildur reminds Elendil of his younger self#which really explains his reactions to him getting up to shenanigans lmao#not to cover up the cute little shrimp in the meme BUT#all of these except the top left one are from season 1#however that look of confused concern to Earien reminded me of the others#I'm sure there's about to be a lot more he looks quite befuddled in the preview when Miriel puts her hand on his chest#Elendil#Lloyd Owen#The Rings of Power#Elendilf#Rings of Power#TROP#ROP#the lord of the rings#the lord of the rings: the rings of power#lotr: rop#lotr#Numenor#lotr memes#rop memes#trop memes#me when im huh??? im wuh????#that tag is not gonna help me find this again later lol
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#i don't really have friends like that#except my wife we are also besties#but we have the same internet experience so we have similar humor#but im sure this will be relatable to someone out there
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MERSKELES PART 3!
Definitely not mermay anymore but here's the last 3 sirens I wanted to do
and some explanation on why I choose what I did under the cut
(little warning for parasites on fresh's section)
So from left to right
Dream is a golden colored koi carp fish, I picked it because they are very pretty and they represent a lot of positive things like luck and fortune, some people even wish on them to make their dreams come true :> I also thought of the legend where a golden koi fish climbs a large waterfall to turn into a dragon, so they have some mythical legends as well. In terms of the actual fish, Koi are very sociable and sturdy, they also live for quite awhile.
Nightmare is a coelacanth, he should probably be an octopus considering he has tentacles, but I really wanted to make him a coelacanth because I think they are neat. Coelacanth's are very old with the latest fossils being over 400 million years old, they were thought to be extinct until one was found in 1938, grandpa nightmare. They are also nocturnal, sleeping in caves during the day, they live deep in the ocean as well.
Fresh is actually a two in one, he is a rainbow parrotfish with a tongue-eating louse in his mouth. Out of alI the bright fish I did a parrotfish because I really like their gradients, and I think the magenta fins fit his jacket. He's a parasite inside of a Sans body, so I picked a fish parasite to go along with the fish half of his body. I chose the tongue-eating louse, a type of parasite that replaces a fish's tongue. It first severs the blood vessels to the tongue and once it falls off takes its place. feeding on nutrients and acting as a new tongue for the rest of the fish's life, very cool and terrifying.
#parasite#No irl photos or anything but warning for describing how the parasite invades a fish#Tongue eating louse dont affect parrotfish Im pretty sure but Im ignoring that for fantasy#Fresh was also a combo between the Rainbow and bicolor parrot fish for the colors I put rainbow on the sheet because it sounds cooler#I love coelacanths sm they are like one of the neatest fish#I remember really liking relicanth as a pokemon and then realizing it was actually a real animal???? Phenomenal#Also someone requested dust If youre reading this I think he would be an eel of some sort#maybe a Gulper eel?#Angler fish would be cool too but only the females have the classic light lure on their heads#The dragon koi legend Im pretty sure is the inspiration for magicarp and its golden shiny#I would say im done with fish for now but im not I love fish Ill probably do something else aquatic related at some point lmao#Mermay#its july :''')#my art#my utmv art#utmv#fresh sans#nightmare sans#dream sans#dreamtale#utau#undertale au#sans au#siren#mermaid
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screenshot redraw! though i took creative liberty in making it rain here even though it isnt (yet) in the screenshot bc i thought it'd be cool (i also enjoy drawing water droplets)
there are two versions of the drawing here, the first one is edited for mobile to get it to look closer to my intended colors, while the second one is the original from my computer. the third image here being the original screenshot, lol
#my art#revolutionary girl utena#rgu#juri arisugawa#hate how different the computer vs mobile colors are... the original looks so dark on my phone </3#my computer always displays colors lighter than they appear so unfortunately a lot of my drawings look darker than intended on mobile#sometimes the difference isnt too bad but this time it was. pretty obvious#hence two versions of the drawing#anyway im very happy with how this turned out#the original screenshot just stuck with me and. im not sure what it is about it that i like so much#but i just really wanted to draw it#still got two other rgu related drawings to finish but at least i got one done#anyways its 3 am... time for me to depart to eepytown#2023
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hi 😁
#sorry for disappearing even though i had really big plans and all in 2023#i dont feel comfy disclosing but ive had really bad health problems for a while#im only just recovering and slowly getting back into fandom spaces and games and stuff#im kinda out of date with my twst info so not sure when im gonna write again but ill try#if anyone has resources for like summaries or character stuff hmu yall 😭 what even happened since theb#not twst related
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What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)
#witch hat tag#orufrey#er.... i'm too tired to have anything to say..i worked several days on this.#wait.. didn't i say just recently here that i probably wouldn't ever depict 'what if alaira is qifrey's sort-of ex'. What's going on#i don't even remember deciding to draw this..it's all a blur..i'm not sure why i WOULD decide to draw delicate scenes in my head#that i wouldn't really want to share with anyone/discuss so why did i draw it...#some part of me really really wants to draw things that are more and more true to myself...#maybe because of my alienation with most romance/shipping/dynamics the rest of the world depicts.#orufrey really is perfectly suited to me - what i read in the text and what is in my head. well anyway#i am TIRED of drawing poses and angles and..maybe now i will actually take a break from drawing bc of the tediousness of Angles#btw it really is a 'stretch of time' . . . assuming witches graduate age 18-20#well orufrey are canonically 30-ish. they've only had agott around for presumably about TWO years (?) bc she took the test age 10#and it feels like oru moving in/unknown atelier acquisition/building (?) .. i guess that could be a year or so before agott at most#(she was the first disciple) so... ????????? What about the other 7 or so years ?!?!?!!?!?! Unemployed Brimhat Hatred era#that time is very nebulous. after qifrey went to the tower i feel like it's been implied he and oru drifted apart a little.#certainly they didn't live together at first... no way. that doesn't feel like how it is based on things oru has said about becoming Eye#idk. I'm tired now. i don't usually think of alaira as necessarily qifrey's ex and this being how things went in that 'sliver of time'.#i usually prefer the idea that they have their first kiss with each other in their 30s cause That's Just The Orufrey Lifestyle#just felt like making a more relatable alternative view of my own Cai Orufrey Canon one time. btw im a big monoshipper and it hurt a bit#let's leave it there. this is surely the most i've worked on a 'single' art - though now i realise just how much longer the fic took :')
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I'm so over the victimhood complex of feminine cis women.
Gender diversity isn't a threat. Diversity in gender presentation isn't a threat.
Femininity is not equivalent to purity and innocence.
Femininity can still be harmful when enforced on people who don't want it. Women and feminine people can still do harm. Femininity can still be weaponized, especially white femininity.
#Im just so over this shit#as a transmasc person#people really need to reevaluate the way they treat more masc presenting people and aesthetics#and cool it with the radfem type shit#men and masculinity arent inherently bad#femininity isnt inherently good#cis women aren't the allies everyone thinks they are#queer discourse#transmasc#transmasculine#transman#nonbinary#non binary#enby#androphobia#transandrophobia#also#like#HUGE s/o to masc or tomboy trans women#im sure that shit is hard on yall too#and yall are so cool#trans#transgender#yes this is related to idiots on reddit#who insist my little pony must be feminine and for girls only#because its more innocent and pure#or some bullshit#imagine being bothered by the idea that non women like my little pony#in the year 2024#fantasy is for everyone
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#im so sad it was such a good ask blog too but my mood has been so severely impacted by it i literally could not handle it anymore#big surprise your favorite character being put through constant and severe turmoil is emotionally damaging. who wouldve guessed#it makes me sad people are so fucking mean too :^(#<- in relation to some of the asks folks send in to guide stories along#like sure cute aggression yeah whatever but some of yall are straight up cruel for no reason. ill never understand it#i really wish i had the heart to keep following this blog bc its such a huge and beautiful passion project... but im sensitive:^(#even if its fictional#sorry to the mutual i had to break </3 wahhhh#late night personal posting. goodnight#laika originals#oh should i tag this as uhhh#vent#? kind of not really im just talking here
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A little costume with eyebrow whiskers again.. making their return lol..
#fantasy costume#fantasy fashion#fantasy aesthetic#No idea what to tag this generally or which tags are even used on tumblr lol... I think thats the thing I'm worst at with social media#is just knowing how to understand and use tags. I think I take them too literally or something or have trouble categorizing#Since I go to the tag and check it and it's too scattered of a group of things then I'm not sure whether something fits there#or not since it's like 'eh.. well.. there are also a lot of things in there that ARENt like what i'm posting''#I have like the opposite problem of those spam blogs that will tag their posts with 800 barely related things. like a picture of a random#girl in a dress and it's tagged 'the simpsons. macklemore. downton abbey. fortnite. girly things. gothic horror. vibes. brad pitt. golf.''#or whatever lol.. where I will feel like if less than 85% of the tag is exactly completely related to what im posting then its like 'eh...#maybe I shouldnt post there...who knows what its even for.. . what if theres some tv show named 'fantasy costume' which im unaware of#and people will assume i'm mocking the show' or some weird thing like that. Anyway lol#Another one I almost didn't post since I've just hated all my costumes recently.. I'm not sure why.. maybe my camera is getting old??#Because they look fine in person - it's more specifically that I dont like the PICTURES of them for the past 2-3 yrs or so. like i know#it's not my facial features it's more like... the lighting or something?? I just always feel so much like it looks nothing like how it#did in the mirror in real life. Like the colors will be off or it will be too bright or weirdly shadowed or something. maybe one day I#accidentally changed a setting on my camera and never changed it back. But it used to be a lot easier to find images I was okay with. -_-#I did just really want to do the eyebrow whiskers again though since I've always found them fun. And also to use the star things as part of#mouth jewelry. They're actually just star shaped paperclips that I kind of bent to be larger. Then the green shawl thing is a pillowcase#Looking back on it I would've liked to do horns or something since the top of the head is a bit bare lol#self
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Childhood Antecedents of Multiple Personality - Richard P. Kluft
Q.10 Have you ever gotten angry at other people? I don't think I've gotten angry before. Isn't it kind of disgraceful to get angry?
#milgram#mikoto milgram#Mikoto#mikoto posting#im pretty sure i actually read a lot of this book awhile back but. well. the dissociation do be dissociating bc i dont remember 95% of it#BUT! i DO remember this one specific excerpt!!!! i remember thsi very well#and i remember when i first saw this interro answer i was immediately reminded of this excerpt#but i couldnt remember Where i had seen it so i thought maybe i was just going crazy or something and had made it up--#BUT I FINALLY FOUND IT#''however she had two alternates--'' TRIKOTO CONFIRMED!!??! 😱🤯 /j#tbh mikoto is kinda funny bc he seems fake as shit (and i mean. ig technically he is) and ppl clown on him for it#but in reality he just has DID and doesn't even know hes being fake 😭#its really funny bc its very relatable#mikoto: ive never really gotten angry i dont think :0#john beating up someone behind him with a bat in pure unfiltered rage: so true mikoto youre perfect sweetie
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Look.
Ace Attorney fandom.
I know why people don't like Turnabout Bigtop. I am among the people who dislike Turnabout Bigtop.
But I GET why people like the case. I'm not going to be one of those annoying people who just blindly dump on it because I hate those mfs too.
Thing about Bigtop isn't that it sucks. Thing isn't the weird grooming stuff (though that is a huge part of it). It's not that it could've been good.
It's that - in my personal OPINION - it could have been *great*.
I think it had the potential to be one of the best third cases in the trilogy. It had everything; a fun and goofy setting fit for a pretty dang goofy lawyer game - where the environment itself had jokes and quips and one-liners and mishaps and tomfoolery written all over it, it had the previous case introducing a very interesting and important plotline that gave background for one of the more well-loved characters while also introducing an equally fucked up and lovable new one who was a child forced into a shit childhood of naivete in a CIRCUS with another character who was very naive and childish - whose interactions could have been funny and cute and reflective of said shit from the previous case (seriously she becomes such an important character in the 4th case, WHY would they not include her in this one for some character development? How did they fuck up letting a CHILD explore a CIRCUS?? That would have made the interactions flow MUCH better).
They had a pretty good, sympathetic killer imo, a morally dubious victim, an asshole of a client (who was pretty flat admittedly in-game, but I like his weird, topsy-turvy reasoning for it in the anime. Also, I think Max being kinda a dick would have bode well for the themes of Farewell since most of his clients up to this point have been like...nice? Not nice, but sympathetic, but him having to defend someone who's innocent but a prick would have shown him that just because someone is an asshole, doesn't mean they deserve to suffer for it and that they have the potential to grow as people, which is almost a complete foil to what Matt was. Ultimately, I would have loved the contrast of them as clients and I think it would have also served as character development for Phoenix, especially with his low-empathy tendencies).
They just didn't think that far ahead. They just didn't execute it well enough. They just decided to make three of the adult characters fight for the hand in marriage of a teenage girl. (Bat's part of the story was actually kinda good if he was just YOUNGER, I think him doing that for Regina would have been a stupid thing someone in the circus would do to impress their crush. Damn you Ace Attorney and your weird treatment of underage girls!!)
It just flopped and that's ok.
Even though it kinda sucked, it can still mean something to me.
Also I'm a Moe Curls apologist. I liked him, shut up.
#didn't care for the dialogue either.#DON'T GET ME STARTED ABOUT FRANZISKA DON'T DON'T DON'T DON'T DON'T YOU DARE GET ME STARTED#THIS CASE WAS SO GOOD FOR HER DEVELOPMENT THAT'S NOT EVEN A “COULD HAVE” THING#sure she could've been fleshed out a bit more#but the stuff we get from our interactions with her in this case is GOOD. SHIT. It's just that this case is so hated that it's overshadowed#and yeah. i like Moe Curls. i think he's cool and he added some flair in an otherwise bleak case.#i think his whole unfunny clown schtick was very entertaining. it reminded me of this one shel silverstein poem i loved as a kid#clooney the clown.#tbh ive wanted to rewrite Bigtop for a while now#get a script together and all that. but im an amateur writer who's burnt out as shit and never posts anything writing related#except analysis i get way too excited and proud of. oh well#maybe someday.#also rq why does every other tripple-a game get really good in depth analysis video essays#with their complex literary themes talked about#but with Ace Attorney - a game about reading longer than most books - half the fans have the absolute most dogshit literacy comprehension#it's actually painful. ESPECIALLY with Franziska's character#anyway i'll stop.#ace attorney trilogy#ace attorney#ace attorney justice for all#turnabout big top#franziska von karma#phoenix wright#phoenix wright ace attorney#pearl fey#farewell my turnabout#moe curls#regina berry#ig ore if this is incomprehensible i did not proofread this.#i simply do not like how fran's only traits to somea these mfs is “annoying overemotional teenager haha grumpy whip lady”
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I don't have the proper words to like describe it aptly, but the song 'same train home', despite it coming right after a gruesome tragedy, is just so fuckin soft and warm and comforting and not just in the 🎶"Oh let them stare in judgment, let them witness this/ Swan leans into Mercy, pulls her deep into a kiss" 🎶 sense (though I will argue that section is one of the best written parts of Warriors). I mean it in the sense of the train being the only constant among the lives of new yorkers in the story and how both the warriors and us, the audience, enjoy brief respites in it. I dunno how to fuckin describe really I'm at a loss now, but I like the brief comfort everyone involved takes in it as both the audience and the characters near the end of the story. oh and it also does help that the song is like genuinely fuckin beautiful
#im no new yorker so like i cant say this fkr sure#but im getting the feeling that the subways and all that train transpo is a big part of new york culture#and that finding brief respites in subways amidst the chaos of new york is a commonality#alongside the implication that everyone is like i dunno equal in a sense that they're all taking the same train home#it really does seem like a shared experience and a vital part of new york culture from my perspective as a outsider so like#yea i dunno i really dont havr the words#but i like how comforting it is#and i can kinda relate to it with the ph jeepneys and all that so yea#warriors#warriors album#warriors musical
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tired: caine x pomni, in the sense that caine is trying to keep her there forever with his own malicious intentions (and pomni has given up entirely, probably on the verge of abstracting if caine will even LET her), or pomni is using the relation in order to escape . very bad. very ooc. what is wrong with you
wired: caine x pomni: in the sense that they both understand that they cannot be together forever and that's ok. they still love eachother so so SO much nothing can change that and are ACTIVELY working to help pomni escape in a way that she can bring caine with her.
sometimes they find themselves thinking "i want to be with you forever", then pausing and going "...when exactly is 'forever', really?". sometimes one panics over the idea of being abandoned and going back to square one all over again, or one of them abstracting, or some horrible event that will separate the two. but they understand that the shitty situation exists and is stopping them from anything further, and they're trying to fix it as best as they can. and even if they do part one day (in the case that caine is unable to, somehow, come to the physical world), who cares? they'll have one another in their hearts, holding their memory close for as long as they live
then again it's 8 in the morning, im half-asleep, and have no idea what im doing
#ask 2 tag#i dont know im seeing a bit of art where pomni is sad and has genuinely given up and allowed caine's whims and “malice” on her#(very ooc#really#its so gross#oh my god stop it)#like really ive seen it im gonna keep it as vague as possible#but like... gross? he would never do that#i might just be crazy (fixated since the january teaser)#but he is NOT the guy to willingly harm someone#yeah sure i need to admit the relation is messy considering blah blah 'le wacky web god and the human soul that got dragged in by something#that we arent sure of yet' but making it straight ABUSE? you're weird!#please block me if you do that...so srs#the amazing digital circus#tadc#showtime#flippy.txt
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HEY DONT BE SAD!!!! LOVELETTER!!!!!!
#claude looping au#in craft and cages#isat claude#isat loop#<- kinda sorta#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#isat act 6 secret encounter spoilers#<- both of these r vauge but. yknow. im always cautious#is act 3 the? one im thinking of?? m not sure#“im not really doing any refs that aren’t artfight related’ WRONG. loveletter#it is. six hours old. and now it exists. half temped 2 toss them onto artfight for the funsies#super super tldr loveletter is what the theoretical Loop Claude would be in ICAC#something something love hate encarnate. it’s based on solar flares#anyways it has. built in coattails.#chimera draws
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Have I stated how much I hate the whole "Strong Black Woman" archetype and how much it's hurt me as a disabled person? I could go on for hours about how much this has such a detrimental effect on disabled black people. (And honestly just any in general who doesn't fit inside the mold.) But honestly, I'm just too tired of being forced into a role that I can't fill. It's taxing for me both physically and mentally. I wish more people would just understand that I can't do it.
#im exhausted#im just so exhausted#a vent?#not really because im just mad#im sure many of you can relate#ok to reblog#ok to rb#jay's tism thoughts#autizzy#autistic black people#black neurodivergent#black mental health#black women#black people#black and autistic#black autistic#autistic black girl#actually autistic#autism#autistic problems#being autistic#autism things#autistic feels#autistic culture
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