#random bullshit from my brain
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That par doesn't even kour
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something something blood-soaked hands cradling your face something something
anyway here's the post btw
#what if post dp3 logan struggles to emotionally accept that wade Will Actually For Real Survive Anything#and one time they are fighting some random baddies#and they somehow get in a few shots straight to wade's cranium and he drops like a bag of slutty slutty potatoes#and logan goes full berserker trying to get to him#like he just massacres everyone in his way and wade still isnt getting up ohnoohnoohnonotagainohno#(healing factor or no a few direct shots to the brain stem/t box take a bit to recover from)#(no more than five minutes but it's an eternity to logan)#and his heart sinks to the very core of the earth as he kneels down next to wade's body#and his hands are shaking and soaked in blood and he can't seem to sheathe his claws in his dazed adrenalined state#he tries to peel back wade's mask and fear is just *pounding* through his system because in that moment#all he can see are the xmen dead in massive pools of blood#and that feeling of unreality is rushing over him like thiscantbehappeningthiscantbehappeningnotagainohgodnotagain#wade's still and unresponsive and there is so Much BLOOD (hard to tell how much is Wade's and how much is just on his hands)#and logan doesn't even realize he's crying until suddenly wade's eyes light up like a computer restarting#and he's smiling and gasping and joking immediately#“well howdy there hot stuff what did I miss?”#and then he clocks that logan is Not Okay#“... well gee willikers golly goddamn peanut 'twas only a flesh wound! no need to go all waterworks over lil ol me”#“you know it would take a helluva lot more than that to make me shuffle off this here mortal coil!”#“see all better I'm hunky dory peachy keen right as fucking rain”#“I mean cmon I can't have been out for more than five minutes so let's just go back to you being exasperated with my bullshit antics okay??#“...okay sugarboobs? snookums? babycakes?.... Logan?”#and they just sit there on the floor holding each other for a while#wade babbling and logan crying about everything he's lost and wondering distantly how he has come to care so much#about this blithering jokester in like barely a week#that the thought of losing him brought him crashing back to the worst memory of his extremely rough life#anyway that's enough tag mini fic lolol I'm having feelings about my own drawing I guess 😵#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine art
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the father [solar lunacy] the son [you move to dayshift but aren't paid any more, go figure] and the holy spirit [i see you, sundrop!]
#random thoughts#fnaf#solar lunacy because it's what people think of when they think about iconic sun and moon fics (and for good reason)#(bamsara is a master at subtext and creating little scenes that all build up to a beautiful picture)#dayshift go figure because god. the corporate bullshit. the domestic bullshit. THE VIRUS BULLSHIT.#and also because it features my all-time favorite original character (drumroll please)#dundundundundun RILEY GREENE OF I SEE YOU SUNDROP FAME#god what didn't i see you sundrop do right. the characterization. the slow build up of dread throughout the entire fic. riley greene.#IT IS 106 CHAPTERS NOT INCLUDING A POSSIBLE FUTURE EPILOGUE#god sorry to the other two fics on my list but reading i see you sundrop broke my brain a little#the scenes with riley's mother. THE SCENES WITH RILEY'S MOTHER OH MY GOD#you can tell a fic is good when it gets you to give a shit about an oc that hard#their CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT??? WHICH IN TURN FED DIRECTLY INTO WILLIAM AFTON'S DEMISE?????#I AM DEAD. I AM DECEASED.#im rereading solar lunacy rn if you can't tell lol i went on a spree#fucking love the concept of sun not being completely isolated from moon and his illness god fuck#solar lunacy 🤝 i see you sundrop: we're gonna have some wild fucking takes on moon's illness in relation to sun#me: oh god thank god some good fucking food#and OBIWAN??? OF DAYSHIFT GO FIGURE FAME???#best oc side character i think. i want to see him and sun just go at it for an hour shooting the shit#don't really have much else to say on dayshift go figure right now cuz its on SUCH a cliffhanger#that's kind of taking over my mind rn idkwettl#i could go on for hours about i see you sundrop though. that fic grabbed me by the throat and threw me down the stairs#binged that shit in two days#sun mentions having a crush on riley once and it's never mentioned again and that kind of fucks actually#the other two are romance fic and they're REALLY GOOD AT IT OH MY GOD#solar lunacy. just in general. makes me blush so hard it's not funny#OH SPEAKING OF BLUSHING#THE MC IN DAYSHIFT GO FIGURE KEEPS GETTING FLUSTERED IT'S SO CUTE#dayshift go figure is more of a typical 'i am in love and refuse to acknowledge it' fic it's so adorable
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I'm being so serious rn if I ever talk about doing another fringe festival run in the next like 3 years at least send me to fucking therapy. It is a cry for help. This is bad for me.
#im over halfway at least. but fucking christ.#ive barely seen anyone i care about for weeks. im hardly sleeping. im in knee braces and im still in pain.#13 hours a day of people yelling at me. the busiest ive ever seen public transport. eating the most random sporadic shit.#no hobbies. very few friends or family. crying twice a day. i still havent been paid. binding!! binding 7am til midnight!!!! daily!!!!!#my whole body hurts im physically mentally emotionally exhausted im desperately lonely im not doing the things that make me feel fulfilled#when my loved ones are free im either working or passed out in pain and exhaustion#the boss is enabling all sorts of bullshit yet again#im not able to be a person anyone i care about deserves to know#and that makes me not want to know me either#that is at least when i have enough fractions of a spoon left to feel anything at all except upset or numb#i NEED this all to be over#my next free day is my sisters 21st birthday next month my fucking baby sister is turning 21 and i dont know what to get her#i dont have a brain im not being!! a person worth knowing!!!!#my gran fucking fell the other day she's hurt ive not visited her in ages bc of work and finance i want to see my wee gran i want#to buy her ice cream and tell her i love her#i had to clean up an old guy who smashed his face on the pavement today and im just putting That trauma off til at least mid September#my BEST FRIEND gets MARRIED next week#and i can barely think about it because im on empty#im on below empty#they deserve so much better from me#im out. im not doing this again. not like this.
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hunter zolomon, what in the ever loving fuck is going on in your head.
i absolutely fucking love the way he spent so much time working with thawne, had access to every single bit of info in the museum's archives, claims to be an even better flash expert than thawne, SURELY has to KNOW how much of a time altering genius he is from numerous examples (and i doubt any of the 2 epic cringefails are now known to anyone but thawne himself) but still questions eobard's intellectual abilities even more than me here.
hunter. bestie. please name one single thing you were right about besides the clown. please
#insert wii music#his parallel with barry doesnt work A SINGLE BIT. TF WAS HE ONNNNN#yeah sure your own mistake=some rando from the future who got mad at you for 1 phrase and made it your problem. sure hunter. totally same.#AND HIS DADDY FUCKING ISSUES PROJECTED ONTO THE BLACK FLASH?? OF ALL THINGS????#my poor sweet speedster personification of death you did NOT deserve to put up with all this bullshit with those 2 yellow assholes :(#i wish i had the mental capacity to check out other comics including him. the guy is fucking hilarious#he has so SO much potential both comedic and tragic which is practically never discussed#and his main point about having to know pain to act properly heroic makes sense!! i could even agree with that!!#he DESERVES to be obsessed with and have every panel and word of his overanalyzed like i do with thawne#i mean. thawne is at least explainable by his brainrotting crush. HUNTER HAS NONE OF THE SORTS. HES MOTIVATED PURELY BY IDEOLOGY.#PURELY BY HIS DELUDED ASS BELIEFS ABOUT FLASHES AND HEROING AND TRAGEDY TM (and thawne ig??). HES JUST LIKE _THAT_ __RATIONALLY__.#but alas he has his f*nish l*ne moments with wally and im NOT experiencing them. may non-rebirth hunter zolomon remain a mystery to me#i will forever be mad at cw for changing his wonderful amazing and absolutely insane character to a random maniac from earth 2#people who know hunter only from that were ROBBED AF. THIS IS SO UNFAIR#in conclusion i want him on my desk with an open skull for the brain worm examination. NOW.#hunter zolomon#zoom#the black flash#the flash#dc
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Ngl, I feel a little too self-indulgent with Clarice sometimes. At the very least, she's easily outclassed by almost every other vigilante in Gotham. Idk, I've had the vigilante idea in my head for over a year, but I do sometimes play around with her remaining with Jon, but I'm too attached at this point so 🤷♂️
#shiversverse#oc: clarice keeny#ughhhhh my brain keeps doing the thing where i post something about my ocs and then get anxious about them being too self-indulgent#i mean i guess i can have both options being canon for SV considering comic books love bullshit about alternate timelines and whatnot#i think looking at all those mary sue litmus tests back in the early 2010s melted my brain#i mean i think i've suitably nerfed her from being unrealistic for the medium considering she really only gets along with Steph#i think i want to keep her from most of the major rogues gallery and let her fight the more obscure members#i have a huge soft spot for random villains that only show up in the 90s#might let her fight film freak due to the whole “scream queen” and horror film connection#or tally man (i read an issue or two with him for knightfall is he even canon anymore??)#welp now i'm rambling
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Staying up late intentionally: hahaha hee hee >:)
Staying up late because your shitty brain won't produce the sleep juice: I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory
#hiiii why have i been stricken with sudden random insomnia#motherfucker i spent 3 hours lying in the dark with my eyes closed and am no closer to sleep than when i started#my brain's so lucky it's inside my skull it knows i'd fight it over this bullshit if i could#also was anyone gonna tell me that was a hamilton reference lmao i got it from the tumblr post about when you're swimming#and a plant touches your leg
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I'll learn an infinite amount of information as long as you don't format the website or learning environment to make it seem that I am intentionally being educated.
#decided i dont wanna go to school presently#but i dont wanna get a smooth brain either#so i started doing khan academy#and my brain shut down#previously was flying away at learning random bullshit about population genetics from youtube vids and Wikipedia articles#but now the website is formal and i don't wanna#:(((#you gotta trick me ya see#come to the lecture dressed like a street rat or I'm not gonna listen to u
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#it really pisses me off that some of my rl friends make up the most ELABORATE lies to come across as tough#like#i get youre from cali but you and your whole fam didnt get out of the car at a traffic light when you were fucking 6#to try and beat up some guys that threw gang signs at you#your grandad and his brother didnt just beat the shit out of random people at the bar just cause they didnt like someones face#youre not related to the fucking Kennedys#like i cant even talk to him about shit im going through without him going on a loud ass rant about some bullshit#that has nothing to do with what we're talking about#like im trying to rant about my piece of shit uncle and he starts going off about how people always think hes on roids (hes a bodybuilder)#like no offense to anyone from cali but im so fucking tired of people from cali telling me bullshit just cause they think its tough#“im trained in MMA too” literally just said that while i type talking about how hes got “pre workout permanently in my brain” and goes#“thats a dangerous combo. Dangerously trained and dangerous mentality” BITCH YOU LEGIT CRIED OVER KILLING A FRUIT FLY I DONT WANNA HEAR IT#fucking shit im so sick of this shit
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every hex haywire stream is titled something like "my heart bleeds black🖤" and it's something like yoshi story
#man if I was a nijisanji streamer I would take my kayfabe even more seriously. those titles would be incomprehensible bullshit#Stuff like “TEN SCARY THINGS YOU DIDN'T THINK WERE REAL” with like random shit circled on a Super Mario 64 stream#“WHAT IS THE GOVERNMENT HIDING FROM YOU? UL DAH CORRUPTION EXPOSED!!!!”#“MIND WIPING TECHNOLOGY REVEALED: TETRIS: DOES IT EAT YOUR BRAIN CELLS????? (REAL)”#“DEFINITIVE PROOF OF ALIEN LIFE!!! DON'T BE FOOLED! GLOBAL COVERUP OF GIANT BALL TRAGEDY ON TAPE”
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switched from libreoffice to wps because reasons
i'm a bit more used to wps layout (i have it on my phone) but now it won't stop messing up the text formatting when i copy paste text from somewhere else eg ao3 😢 i can only either paste them exactly as how they appear on the webpage or with formatting removed. tried the 'match current format' option and i still lost the formatting
why do microsoft gotta have to be such a bitch
#random#to hell with 360 needing an account and internet and shit to function 🙄#i miss windows 7#things used to be sensible back then#anyone can help me with this#tried re downloading ms 2016/2019 to no avail#couldn't activate them even when the key seem to work#my old ms word was a native install that come with the laptop when i bought it#so i don't have the old key/file with me#and microsoft is being so damn difficult about it#we didn't have to deal with shit like this pre win 10#with all these 'always connected' and 'cloud' bullshit#microsoft ain't getting any money from me EVER#my brain and me
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Had a psychologically revealing work dream about leadership insecurity and anxiety set in an abandoned shopping mall. While I was walking towards the exit just before I woke up, a circle pit formed behind and technically distantly ahead of me around a large empty display area. I was the leader and I was bad at setting an example but I tried and people followed!
#what a layered dream#I feel weirdly peaceful#most of my dreams are just random bullshit or amazing stories or fucking terrifying#I woke up from this one feeling like I learned something#maybe my brain was like enough dicking around#make this OBVIOUS#dream#dreams#all the subtlety of a sledgehammer#I wasn’t working retail in the dream#I was going through some kind of interview with an old coordinator at my current job#where she acted annoyed and like I was very blatantly hurting my career by not being confident in my growth and skills#it wasn’t like she was trying to boost my confidence she was like oh it says here you’ve improved on this#can you explain why you haven’t#PHEW#jesspost
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⊹₊ ⋆ ㅤ— “FEEL YOU FROM THE INSIDE . .ᐟᅟ ”
part 1 | part 2
wrd count: 1304
warnings: smut, fem!reader x josh, dry-humping, drinking, josh is a pervert, semi-plot, make out, drunk reader, smutty indications, aggressive teasing
a/n : my bi-monthly drop!!!! wrote this for my dear friend adri, and me :3 but also because i just finished until dawn and this sexy man is EVERYWHERE… will be writing more of him soon. stay tuned ! ;)
you knew your limits when it came to alcohol, what you could handle and what you couldn’t.
but joshua washington had to be the world's best sweet talker. because you’d convinced everyone at the lodge you’d be the most sober.
now you were the only one slurring out a random song with an empty bottle of expensive vodka wrapped around your perfectly jeweled up and manicured hand.
“jooooosssshhhhh…” you slurred to him, clinging onto his bicep that felt oddly larger than usual. all he could do was give that signature sexy laugh and shake his head at you.
he was gentle with you, still obviously teasing but not to an extent.
the boy knew you weren’t 100% yourself when you got this drunk.
“mhm, that’s my name.” he said to you, the two of you weren’t necessarily separated from the group, but you weren’t close enough to be in their conversations.
that was always the case when the two of you were together.
but to him, close was never close enough.
you were rubbing your face all on his flannel, cheek chubbying up and only looking up at him through your eyelids.
eyes big and full of drunken content.
to him, you were just so pretty vulnerable.
the way he was looking down at you was almost straight out of a cheap porno.
his wide eyes, now low and full of an extreme emotion that your weak brain couldn’t understand.
but you had an idea that it was what you were wearing, not to toot your own horn.
soft layers: a tight white tank top stacked with a hot pink zip-up that had fur on the hood and graphics on the back, your tight denim shorts and fleece tights that were meant to keep you warm, but anyone with a right mind knew they were just for show.
technically… you had packed more outfits like this for the trip, but that’s because you weren’t expecting the cabin to be so bitterly cold.
so it wasn’t really even your fault.
in reality, you were dressing this way on purpose.
okay maybe you were dressed like this because you loved the attention.
the peering looks he gave you anytime you walked by, the snarky comments that left his perfect mouth.
who were you to blame? look at that man.
“feelin’ clingy tonight, huh?” he taunted, laughing in your face at the way you were holding onto him and gawking.
“me—? clingy? y’r funny, washington…” all you could do was stutter and stumble on your words.
he made you nervous and you were so intoxicated you could barely think before speaking.
holding him like this made you imagine all the possibilities. all the things you could be doing to each other right now.
and it almost felt like he was thinking the same, like you were always riding on the same wavelength.
you know something else you could ride on.
it was stupid to imagine but there’s always been a tension between you two, so thick and palpable that it left you knees-weak every time he flirted with you.
“let’s just cut the bullshit. c’mon.” before you could even process that he was talking to you, a rough set of calluses were wrapped around your forearm, tugging you somewhere in the lodge that you couldn’t quite comprehend.
the second you heard a door close behind you two, you realized you were in the master bedroom,
only knowing this due to the sudden change of temperature in the room compared to the living room.
“wha- aren’t they gonna n— notice that we’re gone?” you were confused, but you trusted him.
despite the evident look of hunger and lust in his eyes. you trusted yourself in his hands.
“i don’t care. i just needed to get you alone.” his mouth made its way to your ear, slowly, as his warm breath came to touch with your skin,
your body froze up at the sudden attention, making you feel warm. “y/n. almost years i’ve been fantasizing about you, ever since we met,” he paused and cautiously reached for your hips.
his hands were warm and you felt safe, once you processed his words you became putty in them.
“huh?”
was all you could mutter out, keeping yourself in place by grabbing onto his triceps, looking up at him through your full and wispy eyelashes.
“i’m sayin’ i wanna fuck you, pornstar. your skin is so soft and warm. i wanna know,” he paused to straighten himself up and look at you.
“i wanna know what it feels like inside that pussy of yours.”
drunk, he was drunk this had to be the drinks talking. there was no way this was real.
even if he was intoxicated, that didn’t stop his words from going straight in between your legs. arousal pooling onto your lacy panties.
could’ve sworn your eyes started to roll back at the dirty talk, he was so good at it too.
“y’don’t mean that—“ he quickly cut you off, pulling you in nice and personal and grabbing at the plush skin that was covered by tight denim. “i do. with every fiber in me, i swear i do.”
the physical attention was overwhelming, and the verbal one was even more intense. you didn’t know what else to do but to give in to something you’ve been praying for for so long.
you couldn’t even suck in a breath before he was crashing his lips onto yours.
it was a kiss that made you dizzy, you melted into it though, wrapping yourself onto him.
he led you backwards, kissing you still while he was walking, pressing your back against whatever wall was close; stabilizing you with his knee between your legs.
you were holding onto the hair on the back of his head for dear life, loving the hot and messy kiss so much that it turned you on.
all the sexual frustration of not getting any in almost a year turned you into some horn dog.
your head was spinning, you could barely make out a thought. josh’s hand began to unzip your jacket, sliding it off your body while his lips started roaming down your neck.
“i ca— can’t take it,” a whine slipped out of your lips, head turned to face away from him to hide away your embarrassment.
this didn’t stop him though, you felt him smile against your skin and only itch on more.
rutting your hips for you against his clothed leg while he started sucking ravishingly against your neck, josh himself could barely keep himself from grinning at how much he’s won.
josh was the type for messy and quick sex. but when he thinks of having it with you, he wants it hard and slow.
painfully slow. so he can make you take in everything, make you feel everything all at once.
his fingers started sliding off the straps of your tight shirt, lips starting to make contact with the plush skin of your breasts.
“so fuckin’ sexy. just like i imagined. you g’nna let me give it to you? hm?” he was teasing, words muffled by the way he had his lips wrapped around your nipple.
“god i can’t wait to fill you up. gonna tell chris how good this pussy is.” josh snickered, grinning at the mess he was making of you.
and he hadn’t even fucked you yet.
he brought himself up to bite on your ear, hands teasing your breasts as your hips (which had minds of their own) kept grinding on his knee, the friction making your brain go into mush.
your mind was completely blown, blank and empty.
fingers were digging and wrinkling up his flannel as your mouth was agape.
you were all hot and bothered, needing and yearning for more.
if you felt this good only from foreplay, imagine how good being so full of his dick was gonna be.
you couldn’t wait.
you were letting out noises you didn’t even know you could make,
and he was barely getting started.
#heldbykento#fan fiction#until dawn#josh washington#josh until dawn#joshua washington#josh washington x reader#until dawn fanfics#reader x joshua washington#smut fanfiction#josh washington smut#writing
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There's a good reason why I try not to argue publicly with anyone under 18, and it's not that I think they're inherently stupid, it's not that I think their brains are "underdeveloped", it's not that I think they can "do no wrong", it's that I never know how much freedom they actually have to think freely, or how many of their opinions are actually their own. Of course, under-18s *can be* capable of thinking for themselves and developing their own opinions, but (here in the US at least) law and culture put a lot of roadblocks on their ability to do so.
Of course parents and teachers cannot actually control the inner thoughts of the children they wield power over, but they can restrict the information that they have access to, can punish them for saying the wrong things, can cut them off from healthy diverse social groups, and can convince the child their thoughts are being monitored through religion, psychology, and other appeals to higher authority.
Thus if a random teenager says some headass shit in my mentions I have no way of knowing if these are opinions they arrived at on their own, or if they are dogmas forced on them by the people holding food and shelter over their head. If it's the latter, there's nothing to be gained from a public confrontation: people are generally unwilling to change their opinions in a direction that threatens their social support system, and they are especially unwilling to do so at the behest of an internet stranger who cannot offer alternative forms of support. If a teen is genuinely curious about my opinion (that is *if they consent* to a discussion of disagreements) and if I have the mental bandwidth for a potentially emotionally loaded conversation, yeah I'll have it, but I'm not gonna maintain any illusions about my ability to change their mind until they can find a way to live independently.
This is also why my leniency toward the not-yet-adult tends to also extend to the recently-adult. Coming up with a system of beliefs that you're actually willing to stand behind? Shit takes time, and I'm not necessarily gonna expect it of a 20-year-old who may, for all I know, have been living under conditions of near-absolute control up until their 18th birthday. Sure they may be opening their mind in college, or college may be their parents way of keeping them too occupied with busywork to develop new opinions, as they continue to hold financial support over their head. It's around their mid-twenties that I'm willing to go full gloves-off antagonistic with strangers, knowing that they've had a few years of legal and social adulthood under their belt, and that even if they're still financially dependent on their parents it's a different sort of dependence, one where they're given default legal permission to run away from home.
A lot of people are deeply uncomfortable with this line of thinking because if you look too far into the factors that influence young people's thoughts, you eventually have to start asking yourself which forces of dependency are influencing your own beliefs and opinions. Yeah, as an independent adult you may have the option to quit your job, divorce your spouse, ditch your friends, move to another country, but realistically how many of these can you accomplish at the same time? How many do you even want to? And how are all of these forces *in aggregate* setting the acceptable limits of what you're allowed to think and feel? It can be upsetting to think of yourself this way, it can be easier to think of yourself as a true free thinker and children as mindless automatons, but I urge you to think of mentally coercive environments as a continuum rather than a binary. The point is not to free yourself from all influence, but to gain the ability to see yourself as an influenced mind, and to have compassion for those dealing with all the bullshit you don't have to anymore.
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Watermelon Sugar
Eddie Munson x Fem Reader
summary: Eddie shows you the eight wonder of the world. his mouth.
warnings: reader and eddie are 18+, established relationship, fluff, Eddie being a munch. nicknames/pet names used (baby, honey, sweetheart, etc.) MINORS DNI 18+ smut: fem oral receiving, blowjobs mentioned, talks of past sexual experiences, praise/body worship, swearing. *Skin Color/Ethnicity not mentioned! not proofread, spelling errors and horrible writing.
if I miss anything plz lmk!
a/n: hello my loves! thank you all for the kind words and reactions on my last couple of posts! as you all know smut is not my forte but I felt the need to write this. am I projecting??? maybe but we’re gonna pretend that i'm not :)
The low hum of Steve Nicks’ voice plays through Eddie’s room, the soundtrack of your makeout session with your boyfriend. Orange glow from the late afternoon sun comes through the window, an angelic glow casting around the frizz of the mentalhead’s hair.
It started as an innocent day, hanging out together in a comfortable silence in his room. Him doodling in his notebook and you flipping through one of his old comic books. Somewhere along the way a featherlight touch turned into shared giggles, sitting in his lap turned into a chaste kiss, and it ended up with him in between your parted knees, kissing like his life depended on it.
A curtain of curls block out the skylight, tender lips on yours like melted honey, and big hands roaming down the expanse of your body. When Eddie moves away from your mouth, he takes the oxygen from your lungs with him and you whimper at the loss.
"Gonna let me have a taste of you, pretty girl?" Big doe eyes shine down to you, way too eager and excited. Your stomach twists into knots, the training you put yourself through in case of this moment, has all been for nothing. What do you say to the man that hovers over you with so much love in his eyes?
"How about I suck you off instead, hmm?" You try to come off as sensual but instead you sound scared.
It's an offer that you've made so many times over the short course of your relationship with Eddie. This was your first real relationship besides the eight grade love affair you had with Simon Willard. That only lasted a week.
You weren't anywhere near a virgin, that so called sacred part of yourself is now in the possession of a random boy you met on vacation before your senior year. Hookups weren't uncommon to you but what was uncommon to you was the affection you received during the sex.
People you've hooked up with never really cared to get you nice and ready the way Eddie does, prepping you with two or more fingers, working you open so that it doesn't hurt going in. Guys didn't care if you got off or not, they were just looking for a hole to fill and someone who wouldn't get clingy.
You had guy friends, including Eddie before you started dating, and you heard the horror stories they had of going down on a girl. It was never in mean spirit, although the discussion should've stayed in the bedroom, but it still scared you shitless. How one girl didn't properly take care of herself, causing the smell to be rancid. This girl didn't wipe the right way, leaving scraps of toilet paper down there. And the one that really settled itself into your brain, was how good or bad a girl tasted.
Of course you, and all of your guy friends, knew that girls didn't taste like ice cream, or strawberries, or candy. It was made up, another bullshit beauty standard for woman to worry about.
You had paid attention to the way guys would ask you if you wanted it done. The way they would sigh and roll their eyes like it was the biggest task of their lives. You would end up telling them that you're more of a giver than receiver, and that you just weren't interested in that whole thing. When they would release a breath of relief you would fill with shame, almost like you were the one who requested it to be done and had been turned down. The embarrassment of rejection you didn't even ask for.
So when you and Eddie first had sex as boyfriend and girlfriend, you made it your mission to never let that horrid question come from his mouth. You always made sure to offer him head first, and if it looked like he was about to ask, you'd simply tell him you couldn't wait anymore.
Now here you are, under him, ready and willing to take him in your mouth, and he's gotten the question out before you could beat him to the punch.
"Ya know I will never say no to that, sweetheart. But-"
Uh oh. That's the word that comes before a life or death sentence. It's hanging heavy over you, the once comfortable silence is now killing you. Squeezing all of the air out of your body, limbs going numb with the loss of circulation, all the while your ears ring like an explosion has gone off.
"I want to return the favor." It's so sincere when he says it and it makes you want to cry. A boyish smile taking over his mouth, deep dimples appearing on the fat of his cheeks.
You must look like you've seen a ghost because the pretty smile that was written on his face is now taken over by worry.
"I mean, I don't have to. It's just- I feel like," Eddie's a panicked mess, backing his face further away from your own. The small bubble of love that the two of you created has now been popped with your own doubts and fears.
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable, I just thought I could make you feel good s'all." The confident man that you know all too well is now reduced to a fumbling and anxious person. His fingers work at the chunky silver ring on his finger, twisting and twisting and twisting it around.
"You just always, I don't know. It just always seems like you never ask for head and I just wanted to offer it to you, I guess."
The whiskey eyes that never left your gaze won't even look at you anymore. Focusing on that damn ring that goes faster and faster the longer you wait to respond. You want to run and hide. Dig a deep hole and never come out. Your lovely boyfriend who's done nothing but treat you like the queen of the goddamn universe, now thinks he's made you uncomfortable.
Embarrassment rushes through your veins, throat closing with the grip of shame making it harder to breathe. Tears prick your eyes, hot and heavy, ready to fall at the drop of a dime. You feel so guilty for not just telling him the truth, for not saying all the concerns that you had. Even before you started dating Eddie always confided in you, telling you the deepest secrets that kept him up at night and you couldn't even tell him this one thing.
"I'm embarrassed." It comes out in a sniffle, lip wobbling beneath the teeth that hold it down, trying to make it go away.
"I'm just embarrassed I won't be good. That I'll be another conversation for you and the boys to drink to. Will I taste good? Do I smell weird? Does it look pretty? All of these questions circle my brain and I'm so fucking scared that you won't like me anymore." It comes out like word vomit, so fast and uneven in tone that you're not sure if it even made sense.
You don't have time to think it over anyway, Eddie's too quick putting his hands on your cheeks, gently making you look up at him. The same kind eyes that you always see meet yours. Thumbs gentle swipe the fat tears off of your face, his cold hands extinguish the flames of your skin.
"Honey, I promise you I would never, ever do some dumb shit like that. What the guys and I talk about is irrelevant, half the time they don't even know what they're talking about. I felt the same way when you wanted to suck me off the first time, every single question you ask yourself is what I ask myself." Eddie's eyes are searching yours, looking and waiting to see the dread leave your head.
"Like I said before, I would never want you to be uncomfortable but if you're okay with it, I'd really," He places a gentle kiss on your forehead, "really," he continues to place more delicate kisses around your face, "really love to make you feel so fucking good."
When he's done, he looks back down to you with a dopey smile, he's low and hazy drunk off of you. A smile tugs on your own lips, so warm and fuzzy off of him. You know he means it and you feel sad that you even questioned him. Childish laughter rings out between the two of you when he pinches your sides, tickling out the stiffness in your body.
When the laughter dies down, he asks you again by cocking his eyebrow up in question. Nodding your head, you give him a confident yes, something you didn't feel the first time he asked.
Moving down your body, trails of kisses are left on your skin, mapping out his journey to your center. When he reaches the hem of your pants, he looks up to you once more waiting for a reply. Encouraging him to go further, his chilled fingers douses the warmth radiating off of you.
Leaving you only in your polka dot designed panties, Eddie teases you by running his fingers up and down your thighs.
"I gotta say bub, I love the pink dots. Top notch fashion if I don't say so myself." Eddie jokes and it makes you giggle. Swatting lightly at him, he returns the laughter.
"I'm not lying, I swear! If only you know what you do to me." As much of a joker Eddie is, he was never one to joke about your beauty. He found everything you did, said, and wore so fucking breathtaking and flawless, he'd probably get hard from the sight of you in a Tin Man costume.
"If you, at any time, want me to stop just tell me. I won't get mad, just let me know, okay?" Eyebrows scrunched with seriousness, Eddie makes sure to be loud and clear with his instructions.
"I promise, Eds." You say and he takes that as the green light.
Eddie's index finger teases your cloth slit, running up and down so slowly it feels like torture. When you lift your hips looking for more friction he snorts lightly.
"Patience, my love." His fingers continue to dance over your panties, running back to the top of the band and pulling them down in a swift motion.
When the cool air hits your wet seat, you whimper slightly at the feeling. Eddie has seen your pussy multiple times, but when he spreads it with his fingers, you can't help but feel shy, closing your legs around his arm.
"Don't go shy on me, baby. I just wanna see the prettiest picture I've ever seen." His eyes are still trained on the glistening of your sex, glimmering like bright pools of water.
It feels like an hour of no movement from Eddie before he goes to change his position between your legs. Shuffling back on his knees, he picks your thighs up to place on his shoulders as he lays on his stomach.
Still having doubts, you lean up on your elbows, watching your boyfriend to see what his reaction is. To your surprise, he looks like a kid in a candy store, awe and wonder swimming around in the big brown pools of his eyes.
When an obscene sniff rings through the air, you can't help but cringe a little. Waiting for him to look repulsed, you're again astonished when all your met with is a feral look.
Very tentatively, he runs his flat tongue from your hole to the top of your clit. Moaning deeply, he moves his gave up to you. A smirk breaks out on his features, so devilishly and mischievously.
"Oh baby, you have no fucking clue how good you taste." There is no questioning in his cadence. It's smug and cocky and it makes you shiver with need.
Repeating his motions from before, you mewl at the feeling, lifting your hips again. The chuckle that comes from Eddie vibrates off of you, make you move you squirm. Reaching his strong hands around your thighs, he holds you in place with his firm grip.
When the wet muscle breaches your needy hole, you fall back onto the bed moaning out in pleasure. He works your open with it, flicking it in and out efficiently.
Pulling out of you, he moves up to your bundle of nerves. Starting slowly, he circles around once or twice, before working it in figure eights.
You melt into the bed like a popsicle on a hot summers day. There's not a single thought in your head other than the feeling of his mouth. You're a livewire come to life, so sensitive and lost in the haze of pleasure.
You think this is the precipice of ecstasy but then one of his thick fingers enter you and his mouth sucks hard on your pulsing clit.
It feels like fireworks on the fourth of July, bright and explosive, big loud bangs ringing out into the night sky. It's like the feeling of going down the big drop on a rollercoaster, tingling deep in your belly and a rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins. It's like winning first place, heartwarming and shocking all at the same time.
You feel all these things at the same time, every single one of them caused by the actions of your boyfriends mouth. It's overwhelming and so fucking delicious but you can't say anything than cry out in bliss.
Letting go of your clit with a pop, Eddie's head pokes up at you like an excited puppy. "S'it feel good baby?" You want to answer, you really do but the way he sneaks a second finger into you and crooks them at the perfect angle makes you lose all motor skills.
"Awe, honey" he coos mockingly, "Is it that good?"
"S'good Eds, so good." You're a blubbering, crying mess. So hooked on the feeling of him, hooking on the feeling of how he made you feel.
He doesn't say anything else, too busy pushing his face back between your legs. His motions go faster, fingers hitting that sweet spot inside of you that he only managed to find, his mouth switching between motions, driving you closer to the edge as he does.
The string in your belly is pulling tighter and tighter, barley hanging together by a thread. You're a thrashing, sweaty mess on his bed, gripping the pillow underneath your head that your knuckles will probably be stuck in that position. You don't care, not when he's moving his head back and forth, slurping up your wetness like a handmade milkshake.
It's filthy, down right dirty the way it sounds. The noises that carry out into his room echo so loud the neighbors could probably hear. The squelch of your wetness being pounded into by his hand, the way he's drinking you up like a dehydrated plant, the moans that escape out of your parted lips.
"Eddie, please. FUCK, please." You're blathering at him, not even sure at what you're asking for.
Separating himself from you again, he continues working his fingers deep into you.
"You wanna cum, pretty girl? S'that it? Wanna cum all over my fingers?" You moan louder in response, clenching around him harder as you do.
"Go ahead, be a good good and cum for me. Come on, honey. Cum for me." That's all you need to hear before you're hurtling off the edge of your release.
You release with a silent cry, all the air being punched right out of you. Your body feels weightless, like you were thrown up into the clouds and not being able to come down.
Your whole body shakes, tears streaming down your face, all while your hole pulses and quivers around Eddie's fingers. A gush of wetness coats his fingers, a big puddle under your ass, leaving another stain on his bed seats.
He watches in awe as you hit your peak, how your back arches off of the bed and how you look so fucking perfect like this. The shy girl that never got experience this kind joy, now swims in the ocean of euphoria of the climax. He feels so lucky to witness this, to be the first and last person to ever see you this vulnerable.
Eddie wishes he could paint this moment, make a portrait of the way your kiss bitten lips form the perfect O, make the brushstrokes of your hair and some of it sticks to your sweaty face. You're so beautiful and he doesn't know how blessed to be yours.
When you float back down to earth, to the springy mattress of Eddie's, you take a moment to catch your breath. When he removes his fingers from you, you weakly hiss from movement and he offers a quiet sorry.
Moving back up to his knees, he hovers over you and smiles brightly down at you. Smiling weakly back at you, he uses the hand that's not supporting his weight to place it on your jaw. His thumb brushes back and forth and you melt right into it.
"How was that?" Pink tints his cheeks, grinning ear to ear.
You chuckle weakly, shaking your head in disbelief.
"I think I went to outer space for a second there."
A booming laugh leaves his chest and it makes you smile even harder. Your heart feels so full and so happy. You're so in love with him and it makes you delirious. You want to see him like this for the rest of your life, big smiles and even big laughter, so pretty and delicate only for you.
"Well I'm glad you enjoyed yourself there, space cadet." Leaning down to press his lips to yours, your soak in the feeling of it. When he moves away you pout at him, and he bops you on the nose with his finger.
"I was thinkin' I could return the favor, big boy." You whisper seductively.
"Oh baby, that sounds wonderful but-," He makes eye contact with you, "I need to be in you like yesterday because that, right there was the hottest thing I've ever witness."
"I happen to be a romantic. So I shall wait until my fair maiden is okay to resume our activities." Closing his eyes with pride, he places a hand on his heart.
Hiding your face with your hands, you bust out laughing at his little antics and when you peek between his fingers you see his teeth flashing back at you. Removing your hands from your face, you tuck a loose tendril behind his ear.
"You're a dork, but that sounds good to me."
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Thank you all for reading! I loves you all and hope you enjoyed!!!
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#eddie munson smut#eddie munson#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x you#eddie munson blurb#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson fic
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the madman's mind
mattheo riddle x Ravenclaw!fem!reader this is my first time writing for mattheo... I will get back to my husband theo soon though I just came up with this idea and it didnt seem very theo fitting
bullshitting (v.) - when someone has no fucking clue what they are talking about, yet insists on trying to get others to believe him/her.
"Want to hear some random facts about mice?" + "You're such a liar!"
Talking out of one's ass is a unique skill. One that Mattheo Riddle had been honing since... well since forever. Sometimes it proved to be rather difficult especially when considering that Mattheo didn't actually have lips on his rear. Probably.
Nonetheless, he really was quite proud of his ability to talk about absolutely nothing in long winded and intricate-sounding sentences. So much so that he often found himself able to convince even a few Ravenclaws of "facts" that he'd come up with on the spot. Well, there was one Ravenclaw that he'd never quite managed to fool.
Y/n was everything Mattheo shouldn't like in a girl. She was rude, judgmental, and far too stiff for her age.
And yet, she was all that he could think about.
How could he like someone who was determined to make him look like an idiot in front of the entire student body? And how could a girl possibly look so beautiful while doing so? Honestly, more than anything, it confused him.
A snapping sound pulled Mattheo back to reality. You were in front of him, right hand on a bumped out hip, and left snapping in front of his face. He tried to force a sneer onto his face, but the way that the sun setting over the courtyard bathed you in such a perfect light made it hard for him to bullshit even himself.
"Are you even listening to me Riddle?"
No.
When you started to turn away, Mattheo knew he had to do something to keep your attention on him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a scraggly looking mouse run over the cobble.
"Do you want to hear a fact about mice?"
When you stopped but didn't say anything, he took that as a cue to continue.
Shit. Shit. Now he had to make something up on the fly. But you'd turned to look at him with those eyes of yours again. Every thought he'd ever had crawled out through his ear and he swears he heard parts of his brain splattering on the ground next to his feet.
"They... mate for life?"
Immediately, your beautiful eyes rolled so far back Mattheo thought you'd passed out from his stupidity.
"You're such a liar!" But your bite wasn't in it. All the animosity that your voice usually held was choked behind the giggles that escaped in between your words. Then and there, Mattheo decided that he would gladly be the world's biggest idiot if it meant you'd keep laughing like that. If you'd keep looking at him like that.
Fuck, he was in deep.
#slytherin boys#slytherin#slytherin boys x reader#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle x reader
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