#can you explain why you haven’t
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Had a psychologically revealing work dream about leadership insecurity and anxiety set in an abandoned shopping mall. While I was walking towards the exit just before I woke up, a circle pit formed behind and technically distantly ahead of me around a large empty display area. I was the leader and I was bad at setting an example but I tried and people followed!
#what a layered dream#I feel weirdly peaceful#most of my dreams are just random bullshit or amazing stories or fucking terrifying#I woke up from this one feeling like I learned something#maybe my brain was like enough dicking around#make this OBVIOUS#dream#dreams#all the subtlety of a sledgehammer#I wasn’t working retail in the dream#I was going through some kind of interview with an old coordinator at my current job#where she acted annoyed and like I was very blatantly hurting my career by not being confident in my growth and skills#it wasn’t like she was trying to boost my confidence she was like oh it says here you’ve improved on this#can you explain why you haven’t#PHEW#jesspost
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Prompt:
Jason keeps accidentally drawing parallels between his running away to Ethiopia and getting killed.
He leaves a note saying he‘ll be back soon? Three terrified bats AND a supe crashing through the roof of a 7/11.
Casually mentioning he‘ll be going overseas to check up on a lead? Surprise! Nightwing‘s going the same way! What a coincidence!
Jason pushes someone off the roof? “Don’t worry Jaylad, I know it was an accident!!!!”
The next gig takes place at an abandoned warehouse? “Explosives whomst?? No, Jason, of course I didn’t scout the area beforehand. Don’t be absurd. Your bombs?? Oh, those were yours?”
Look, it’s not that Jason doesn’t appreciate a demonstration of how much they care. But he’s getting seriously fed up with the level of overprotectiveness everyone’s displaying.
Although, in retrospect, he could have handled this whole thing better than having an open spat with Bruce and then disappearing on them for two months straight. Oops.
(In his defense, Kori got them cards for a once-in-life-time-space-opera.)
#prompt#still stuck in the hospital and I need something to giggle at rn#and what’s better for it than some batfam crack#Jason did not think that last one through#that stunt was not worth Bruce having a genuine and full blown meltdown#also can someone please explain why everyone’s got contingency plans for Nightwing on display?#what do you mean you haven’t slept for a week Tim?#WGAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR’RE LEGALLY A ROGUE NOW!?#Kori I need you to extend our space trip-#Kori: hell no you’re on your own bye#Kori: Roy get Biz and then we’re outta here#Kori: we’ll check back next year if earth still exists#Alfred: … I take it I can store the guns back in their appropriate places?#Jason: ????????????????#jason todd#batfamily#dick grayson#bruce wayne#batfam#robin#tim drake#red hood#unhinged family#protective#I snuck a teeny tiny amount of implied superbat in here#because Clark has adopted all the bat children sorry I don’t make the rules
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I don’t know how to explain any more clearly that it doesn’t MATTER if it seems legitimate to you. You have got to fact check every single headline and post and claim on the left just like you need to do on the right.
The left is NOT immune to misinformation and rushed reporting. And the more emotionally polarizing or shocking the talking points, sound bytes, and headlines are, the worse it is and more frequently it happens.
Learn to verify through multiple independent sources. If you can’t do that, you can’t trust it.
If you have to wait extra hours for the real information to come through vetted channels—NOT just one individual somewhere everyone links to, and not just one single media source either, EVEN if it’s a major news network—thats just how it has to be. What news outside of genuine local disasters near you TRULY needs your outrage and post-sharing in the next hour specifically?
Misinformation works best by not seeming like misinformation and by fitting in with the rest of what you already expect to see. It doesn’t help anyone to not be able to recognize and avoid the stuff.
#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?#and before I get any angry anons saying I’m making the argument that both sides are the same#I am not. and nowhere did I say that#and if your immediate reaction to any amount of criticism of leftist spaces or communication#is knee jerk outrage and defensiveness#this is an invitation to explore why that is for you.#this isn’t about anyone on here this is from conversations I’ve had with a few people IRL who have shared leftist misinformation a lot#so if you’re feeling attacked by this post and I haven’t directly spoken to you multiple times about misinformation with you responding bac#this isn’t. a vague post. about you. okay?#I cannot reiterate enough THIS IS AFTER IRL INTERACTIONS NOT A CAL OUT VAGUEPOST#and as one final note. IF YOU FOLLOW PEOPLE. WHO CONSTANTLY USE. THE MOST INFLAMMATORY WORDING CHOICES POSSIBLE.#YOU SHOULD NOT FOLLOW THOSE PEOPLE NO MATTER WHAT THEY TALK ABOUT.#no one communicating in true good faith to ALL PEOPLE about facts uses loaded language more than occasionally#the sooner you learn that the better. and that really starts narrowing down the pool of who you want to actually listen to (while still#verifying anything they tell you)#get higher standards!!!! and read some books or watch lectures about actual effective communication to broad groups without using tribalism#and also. anyone on the left trying to convince you of massive efforts and conspiracies that are anti everything#is also wrong 99% of the time and not a good source to listen to#never EVER assume conspiracy when it can be more simply explained through either#ignorance obliviousness incompetence financial greed or misunderstandings#the end. I’m really done this time. I’m just sick of seeing so many people fall prey to this#shh katie#cult escapee#politics and current events#don’t get swept up in the constant tsunami of performative online activism#election 2024#world events
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The doc and the has-been.
#gotham#gotham fox#gotham 2014#edward nygma#leslie thompkins#my Art#edlee#you can view that tag as platonic or romantic btw. I view edlee as queerplatonic personally#I’m not going to explain why they’re dogs here if I haven’t mentioned the dog shit to you ur just gonna have to figure it out. Sorry#I know this painting has imperfections and the picture here shines too much BUT SHHHHHHHHH LEAVE ME ALONEEEEE#They’re really fucking special to me so uh. Hope you enjoy this as much as I did painting it#sorry for not updating my fic with them together I will just when I have motivation and time. Hope this will be enough of them for now#the the reason Ed has no glasses here was they were hard to paint in and he’s laying down anyways so.
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i offhandedly mentioned having seen a movie from the 2000s to my friend and she was genuinely flabbergasted because she thought i “only watched old movies”
#i was like GIRL THE SECOND TO LAST FILM I WATCHED WAS FROM *THIS YEAR*!!!!!!!!#she was SHOCKED#just for that i watched ANOTHER film from this year bc i MUST beat the allegations#i tried to explain The List to her and how i break it up by decade and have intentionally tried to diversity what i watch#and TO BE FAIR to me#the films i have shown her so far have been from the 90s 60s and 40s#which is a BIG range if i do say so myself#like. sorry we haven’t watched any current films together…#you literally LIVE in a building with a theater in it#FIGURE IT OUT#seriously tho i am so grateful to have someone who will watch films with me#i ordered Citizen Kane on Blu-ray so we can watch it together#bc she told this CRAZY story about her shitty ex#and in the back of my head i was like ‘you KNOW what this reminds me of…’#so i intentionally waited to offer to show it to her until we were past the breakup situation#but NOW i am hype#and she is hype#and to be fair that’s probably why she thinks i only watch old movies#but it’s not even old to me#like. if it has sound it’s not old…#i’m gonna have SO much fun in my intro to film history class if i get to take it#my goal is to have already seen every film they discuss in the class so that i can just chill out and enjoy it#the final project is comparing and contrasting two films of your choice and i’m still figuring out what i want to do#excited regardless tho#i’m taking it my last semester as a treat for finishing my degree <33
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i’ve been having a hard time realizing and grieving my naivety/lack of intuition, especially relating to autism and ocd. there’s smth so helpless in feeling like you can’t trust yourself. but i think i’m starting to reach a point of balance. ik i don’t have the best judgment, but maybe my intuition can be the kindness i judged as naivety
i just couldn’t accept the idea that kindness (as far as i understood it at least) could have led me into harm’s way, especially bc protecting myself feels so “cruel,” so maybe that’s not the narrative i have to accept. sometimes i feel like i’m slipping into old habits when i catch myself giving someone a second chance, or the benefit of the doubt, but it’s not the same now as it was before. kindness never led me into harm’s way, it was my lack of trust in myself. i don’t need to dial in my kindness, i just need to strengthen my trust. i need to practice informed kindness
#this sounds so obvious writing it out and i’m sure it’s smth most ppl innately understand#but i have a huge fear of becoming jaded and i thought self-improvement meant i would lose a part of myself#i only recently found out that other ppl have to choose to care. did everyone else know this. did you guys know that caring is a choice#learning this has explained. SO MUCH. abt the way ppl have treated and interacted w me#so i’ve had to force myself to care less abt things this yr and let me tell you it’s been a hellish learning curve lmao#i think for the best tho. i think being more discerning is helping me strengthen my self-trust#i don’t think anyone in my life can tell that anything’s changed either so that’s good. it means i haven’t lost anything#just gaining#danbles#autisms#ocd#edit: i don’t want to conflate caring w kindness btw that’s not what i meant#idk how to explain it actually writing this out made me tired. kindness comes from caring but caring can be cruel too#which is why i want to care less to be able to keep being kind#or smth like that. idk it’s 3am gn
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Dabi / Todoroki Touya & @medusashima
How you meet.
You look completely fuckable in your outfit, and he’s not the only one that’s noticed it. There’s guys that stop mid-conversation to follow your movements as you walk by, childish wolf whistles like you’ll come on command (and maybe you will, but not like this Dabi thinks) or the ones that make an absolute fool of themselves by trying to talk to you. Those ones piss him off even more, because they think they actually have a chance with you. Dabi is far more subtle, and even with absolutely no game he’s still better than all these fuckers.
What’s worse is they always try and do it during a set, trying to shout in your ear over the loud riffs of music that blast through the speakers. Not that you’d want to talk to them anyway, but they could at least have some fucking etiquette right?
Dabi wasn’t jealous, he never got jealous— or at least that’s what he was telling himself as he decided to cut in. Crushing his plastic cup beneath a steel-toed combat boot as he made his way over to you. He was just doing his community service for the day, being a real philantophist— he was a fucking saint.
You stumble in shock as a guy twice your size barges past you with no regard, knocking your— very expensive— drink to the ground with no care. You’re already prepared to cuss the asshole out for having absolutely no manners a tatted hand reached out to grab his forearm.
“Better watch where you’re going, asshole.” Dabi speaks smoothly, his voice carries even over the loud music as the guy, who was preparing to fight, takes one look at him before backing down.
“What were you drinking, sweetheart?” Dabi motions to the plastic cup that now lay empty and lifeless between you as you tell him your drink of choice, “And I’ll take a beer since you made me miss the last fuckin’ song.”
You can’t hide that you’re grateful, even if you could’ve dealt with that guy yourself this was certainly much quicker. The drunk loser didn’t seem to know how to take no for an answer, even though your pretty much told him to fuck off it seemed far more affective coming from the broody male standing beside you now.
But what you don’t expect, is for the large, hulking brute of a man to actually come back with two drinks in his hands. Handing them off to the tatted guy before practically scampering away.
The guy hands you the drink with a smirk as he continues to stand beside you while the band plays, at least having the common courtesy not to interrupt their set.
And that’s how you find yourself waking up in your hotel room with a complete stranger and your fishnets ripped. And it works out for Dabi too because he scored a pretty girl, and he definitely didn’t book a hotel room.😭
#I was actually gonna pair you with shindou but I panicked at the last second#cause I was like stop Jo no one wants a shindou matchup#but god he’d fit your vibe SO well Dusa#I can explain why more if you want but yeah Dabi got lucky with you this time#jos festival matchups#ask games#ask game#but also I haven’t decided who I’d ship you with in bllk yet!!#I’m still pondering#I kinda like a match with Chigiri#kunigami would worship you#or Reo’s pretty goth girlfriend ugh
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oversharing in the tags time :)
#i think it’s time i go back to therapy#i keep having recurring nightmares about my ex best friend#or dreams where she reaches out to me. and explains why she cut me out#backstory. in high school had a lesbian toxic situationship with my#bestie. THEN i had another one. which kinda overlapped? the first one was open but also just messy#anyways. jade and i were like together for a year. then she got a boyfriend one day and i had a breakdown#it happened just after high school and i was sooooo … unwell. wasn’t out to my family felt like i was gonna die etc etc#(this is all pre dnp btw) anyways next year i found dnp. a couple months later she broke up with her bf#and we sorted dated for a while (this whole time we’d been just friends and i was still not really over it but hiding it)#and then she dated ANOTHER guy. they broke up and she had a breakdown and moved 9 hours away. i went#to visit her for a month. we like kinda dated again then and i thought we could make it work. then 2020. no travel#so she started dating a guy. didn’t tell me. even though we spoke every day. she moved in with him#then she breaks up with him mid 2021. i started dating my gf. but Jade was clingy and it was awkward#she started dating a sketchy guy who was homophobic. i went and visited her a few times#start of 2023 she tells me she wants to make more of an effort cause he didn’t like her friends so she cut everyone out. then she ghosted#in feb 2023. we had tickets for#mcr in march. i had to text her cause she’d blocked me on messenger and said im going to the concert whether she’s there or not#she said ‘yeah no worries! you can take someone else in my place too 😎’ she used that fucking emoji#and I haven’t spoken to her since. I think she quit her job . and that guy was not a nice man#so I still worry about her#writing this all down makes me realise she was a bitch and I deserve better#but I just want closure. it isn’t fair she replied so casually to my text when I said ‘you’ve blocked me’#it isn’t fair she HAS MY SIGNED COPY OF DANS BOOK#anyways. I need therapy to get over this#and I haven’t even written about my family issues (im#out and they’re supportive but my god they fucked me#up as a kid)#if you read this hi 👋 hope you are having a lovely day#don’t get in lesbian situationships!!!
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Bestie when are you dropping the next chapter
Before you come for me you did say to ask you anything
Yeah I guess that’s on me but uhh idk if you’ve been on my page recently but I was just violently sick for the past like four days and I have multiple assignments and exams (one being that I need write an entire short story for which has been taking up most of my time) so there’s no set time it’ll get posted when it gets posted 👍
#I’m not trying to come after you#bestie#but um#I have a life#I was sick#I have a full time job#im a full time student#also when I say you can ask me anything I really do mean it#but there’s no reason to get an attitude with me#because I will come back with one#also me explaining why it’s not out#is not coming for you#it’s explaining the fact#that fanfiction is my free time hobby#and I haven’t had free time recently#so please#be patient#and I’m sorry for the wait#thank you
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I hope your days aren't as heavy and dark, I am sending all the positive thoughts your way. You deserve the best, fairy princess. <3
😭
#I’ve been getting such sweet asks#I can’t tell you how much they mean to me right now#unfortunately my days have been pretty dark and overwhelming#struggling more than I ever have before tbh#and I’ve struggled most of my life so that’s saying something#also tried to go on TikTok for a little bit and oh BOY that was a bad decision#I might come back sometime soon#it’s just hard when my meds and everything have been making me very sex repulsed 😬#and half of the posts on my feed are very sexy related lol#so I guess that’s probably the main reason I haven’t been on here as much as I used to#also really don’t have the energy to reply or talk to people anymore#(sorry to anyone who has tried to DM me or contact me in any way -#I’ve barely been able to get out of bed so I definitely don’t have the energy to reply to people)#fun fact I went on TikTok finally cause everyone keeps talking about it#somehow ended up on the abortion debate side of TikTok???? so I kept seeing these bullshit debates#the final straw was the other day I saw some dipshit put as their claim ‘prochoice is a mental illness’#don’t even get me started on that it makes me so made I start to shake#I’m sorry but that is so offensive to people who are struggling with real mental illnesses???#went up as a guest (surprisingly) and was trying to explain how ridiculous that statement was and one of the people literally said#‘this is not a safe space’#lol ok byeeeee#obviously not expecting every where to be a safe space but for someone to literally SAY that is wild to me#I always try to keep a safe space no matter who I’m talking to or what about#that still is bothering me so so much#main reason why I’m still on there is cause I love this creator and want to support her as much as possible#but idk how much longer I can be on there… was even thinking about trying to post and make money over there#but ha ha ha guess not#back to square one#I’m running out of space as always but thank you so so so much for the kind words they mean the world to me!! also FAIRY princess???#I’ve never heard that before 🥹🥹🥹 thank you thank you thank you wishing you a lovely day 🫶
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Erm. Get redesigned/finally given a final design because half of these guys existed in doodles only for months. Yes I will be doing the others just wanted to get these fuckers (directed at 313 specifically) done first :3
#Me when I still am very in love with the concept of like all of the CDs#So enjoy all of the silly little guys (and singular bitchass motherfucker (I hate 313 can you tell))#Fate and narrative#Next areeeee ummmm wsit#3013 2587 1684 1479 and 404. Don’t ask why I put them in that order#And then the final batch will hopefully be: 333 440 2888 and 835-597 (yes that is one CD—there’s this whole thing I’ll explain it if asked)#Oh yeah and one mystery design that will be a shadow in the third page because they haven’t been introduced yet :3#S.K draws
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How to explain that going to church makes me hurt and angry, but not going to church makes me sad and depressed.
#I need to go to Mass. I need to get over the anxiety mental block and just go.#blue chatter#it’s just. I’ve only gone a couple times this semester and every time has left me feeling more empty and hurt than when I walked in#and I know Mass is more than just how you feel. and that it matters that I am there where God calls me to be#I know.#I wish nobody there knew me so they wouldn’t be so worried and ask questions about where I’ve been#it’s like. I cannot possibly explain to my church friends why I haven’t been showing up.#it’s not even scrupulosity anymore it’s just. I can’t be here. I don’t belong here.#and the new priest is trying *so hard*. I’ve been honest with him about how I’m struggling.#but it’s just. there’s something missing. he wants to include the congregation but fundamentally doesn’t understand what that means.#‘everyone is welcome. No I will not make an effort to include marginalized people. they’re welcome bc they can Walk In The Door.’#and I know it’s not that the church has changed#if anything I’d be having the same issues with the old priest. I’m the one who’s changed.#but instead of spending my Sundays with God I’m just. melting into a puddle of Sad. and that’s not good for my faith life.#I need to do *something*. I just. any time I think of trying a new church i feel exhausted.#God please help me.#I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t want to be alone and miserable and losing touch with my faith
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I was showing my mother Amphibia and I think I may have forgotten that some people aren’t autistic.
#wren rambles#because she did not understand why I love Marcy so much#and I don’t think that’s something I can explain if you haven’t lived the life of someone who felt isolated in the way Marcy did#and for that matter if you don’t hyperfixate you probably won’t get why Marcy is so happy there#I did learn though that my social persona has been tracking off of Anne for a while#apparently I sound a lot like her and that’s pretty cool
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nothing grinds my gears quite like a second “why haven’t you responded to me yet” message a mere 1-2 days after the original text
#personal#of course something like further elaboration or a change in subject would be valid#im saying literally like along the lines of ‘why haven’t you responded’#im not saying no situation ever demands it but that urgency every time we text is so exhausting#like give me a little bit of time. i say 3-5 days is more reasonable but i’m personally fine with full weeks in between#and i understand the logic of ‘oh they’re not responding to me -> possibly feel bad about it possibly neutral -> i’ll just give them a#reminder so they know no hard feelings’ i really do understand that#but the constant demand of respond to a thousand texts within a day#is personally too much and honestly just not something i’m interested in participating in#and i have said before ‘im not on my phone that much. that is simply how long it takes me to respond to messages. if it’s urgent either#call or say it is urgent that way i know’#AND importantly ‘i don’t go on my phone when i’m hanging out with people’ because that’s almost always what the situation is#and i try so hard to not be annoyed bc i know their intentions are not bad and they just want to talk to me#but idk how many time i have it in me to explain that to the same ppl over and over#and it would be less annoying if there wasn’t a habit of like forgetting this kind of thing about me. i don’t know a better way to say it#anyway. trying so hard to not make this is ‘this is what’s wrong with everyone today’ or ‘i’m so unique’ thing bc i realize how close this#annoyance can get to those places & they’re very much not the attitude i’m coming into this with#ok rant over :p
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Only stressful thing about Stardew Valley is trying to pick who to romance tbh
#i went into this game knowing nothing but that there are 12 eligible people you can marry#and i was like ‘okay i want to meet them all organically and try to discover their personalities and decide who i want based on that’#but everyone is adorable and i just. whoooo do i pick#i mean the first person that i was like ‘oh he’s cute’ was harvey which is Really funny because apparently part of his description is that#he’s not that noticeable and isn’t a very interesting guy#so why did i on day 2 burst into the clinic with the express purpose of trying to flirt with him 🧐 explain that#i like elliot as well though. here is proof of how much i like elliot: i saved up 300 logs before i managed to upgrade my inventory AND#while desperately trying to save up money (i.e. could’ve reallllly done with selling those logs lol) just so i could repair that bridge#by his cabin. i really thought that might be the way to his heart lmao. but zilch! nada#at least i have a new fishing spot now 🫠 we’re just going to pretend i didn’t try to handyman my way into his life#but then i really like alex’s himbo vibe! and i already have a heart with penny!! and abigail is super cute!!!#i don’t know what to DO. i don’t even know how to do this lol. currently i just try to talk to harvey and elliot and tbh whoever else#is around at least once per day. but like. should i be bestowing gifts? should i get my shit wrecked so i land in the clinic? idk#i mean i haven’t even expanded my farm yet so that has to be a priority. i can’t move anybody into my shack. i don’t think the dog#even wants to be there lmao#personal
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…
#hi I’m going to complain for a quick second#so my parents have not contributed a fucking cent to my higher edumacation besides maybe three train tickets#I have paid two semesters so far by my self and with my grandmother giving me some money to help for transportation but that’s legit it#like my parents haven’t financially helped me at all okay#so my dad was going to do taxes today and he told me to print out the college tax thing and I got angry at him#because fuck you use me as a discount when you start to actually help me out at all#so we’re yelling at each other and he’s like oh isn’t there a parent account I can log into and I explain that no it’s fucking college#you do not have a day at all#he does not like this because he really likes being in control of shit#but it’s funny because for the first 16 years of my life he couldn’t give a shit less about my education last two years of HS he tries#to give unhelpful advice that just led to more stress (as in I got a 90 on a test and he’d ask why it wasn’t 100)#so we’re yelling at each other and my sister says to just ignore it because someone might aswell clame it for taxes instead of the state#and yeah sure fine but at least provide some support for me. or fucking tell me you’re proud of me that’s it that’s all I want#the only thing he has given me for school was a fucking BC tee shirt off of Amazon… that’s it#so now we are just fucking avoiding each other and it’s fucking awkward but my mom is treating it like I’m the bad guy here because#I’m angry they told me I had to go to college and now they won’t help me#like I understand that a lot of people don’t have their parents support to pay for college and they do drive me to the train station but#it’s just rude. and I can’t even talk to him about it because oh no big man feelings get hurt when $ is a topic but like grow the fuck up
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