#punny nature
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Flutter Through 200+ Butterfly Puns That Will Make Your Heart Take Wing
Ready to flutter into a world of laughter? Our butterfly puns are sure to lift your spirits and spread joy like a garden full of blooming flowers.
Whether you’re a nature lover or just in need of a good laugh, these puns will make your heart soar. From delicate wordplay to colorful humor, there’s something here to tickle everyone’s fancy.
Get ready to fly high with laughter as you explore the pun-filled world of butterflies. For more winged humor, take a look at our collection of puns.
Read: Butterfly Bonanza: 200+ Puns That Will Have You Fluttering with Laughter and Spreading Joy
#butterfly humor#fluttering puns#nature jokes#insect wordplay#garden humor#flying puns#butterfly jokes#whimsical humor#punny nature#colorful puns
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Part 6 of Arc II (Part 32)
the elevator music is kokomo btw sksksk
⇇ | ⇽ | index | ⇾ (censored) | ⇾ (gore)
#rottmnt#rottmnt leonardo#residuum#rottmnt residuum comic#c#g#tw ptsd#me. naively: this sequence will only take four parts at most! easy#wrong#characters actually have to react to things and you know#have character#i blame my drafting process#also i realized that my natural dry wit and sarcasm a leo joke does not make#this boy is all puns and wordplay#and i am not naturally punny#...is my wordplay too subtle?
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What a treet!
#it's not a typo im just punny#nature#photography#nature photography#summer#naturecore#trees#sunny day#blue skies#tree
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Winging a caption just beak-ause
#cardinal#artists on tumblr#art#nature#photography#beauty#nature photography#photographers on tumblr#mama cardinal#mama bird#bird photography#bird lovers#nest#nesting#beak#orange#punny#pun#mother bird#mother nature#ebb and flow#eb and grow#winging it
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#geology#geography#geo#geomorphology#mineralogy#mineral#rock#igneous#metamorphic#pun#joke#funny#humor#geoscience#meme#wearytaco#cummingtonite#orthoclase#landforms#minerals#feldspar#geology humor#punny#dad jokes#soils#Geoscientist#hydrology#earth science#earth#natural
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a stellar portrait
#queueue#ha ha#punny#birdblr#bird#Original Photography#photography#my photography#original photographer#photographers of tumblr#photographers on tumblr#lensblr#original photography blog#cottage#cottagecore#cottage core#grandma core#nature photography#nature#uncropped nature#wildlife#wildlife photography#wildlife photographer#critter#animal
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really enjoying how silly the joker is in his original appearances in batman issue 1 like. he sure is killing people but he is so so so silly goofy about it. its so so good to me personally
#and same w dick like. hes SO silly and i feel his punny nature and joking vibes are the same as the 60s teen titans and its so so so good#batman liveblog#sorry im thinking about it like. ik hes popular bc obviously he is but god dick grayson's robin is so so good to me personally. v excited+#to get further into it and get so so attached to everyone but idk. its so good so far minus like. the horrors in some of them lol
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ICE why people get hyped about this weather. SNOW way to avoid it. been about 10-12 yr since we got this much downfall of pretty snow :)
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artistic, photog photo to inspire poetry from nature photo
poem 1:
not symmetrical love but fits together like a puzzle piece, rare to find perfect symmetry
as soon as the wind blows
poem 2: moving on. bot finished yet. fix typo later. txt msg. revisions mtr so do omissions in crt academic admissions etc inspire grammar grandma grandsamandma gramma samma
#poetry#poet#photography#nature#poem1#puns#punnies#doubleentendre#millientendre#punnies vs bunnies#i love bunnies theyre cute but rabbits are more mature
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200+ Clever Dirt Puns That Will Have You Chuckling All The Way Through
Dirt puns have a special way of bringing humor out of the ground, literally! From gardening jokes to digging up some light-hearted wordplay, dirt puns are both earthy and fun.
Whether you’re a fan of gardening or just enjoy a good pun, you’re in the right place for some soil-filled laughter.
Get ready to get your hands dirty with over 200 dirt puns that are sure to plant a smile on your face. These puns dig deep into all things soil-related, so sit back, relax, and let these jokes sprout some joy in your day.
20 Dirt Puns That Will Have You Laughing From the Ground Up
“I’m soil over this joke!”
“You dirt me right!”
“I’m rooted in good humor.”
“Digging up jokes is my kind of fun!”
“I soil myself with laughter every time!”
“You’re un-be-leaf-able!”
“It’s about thyme for a dirt pun.”
“Lettuce turnip the soil and laugh!”
“Life’s a garden — dig it!”
“I’m soil-d over these jokes!”
“That pun is dirt cheap.”
“You’re trowel-y funny!”
“I’m all dug in on this!”
“That’s some grade-A soil humor!”
“I’m rooting for you!”
“These puns are blooming hilarious.”
“Sow many jokes, so little thyme.”
“I rake in the laughs every time!”
“Weed be crazy not to enjoy these puns.”
“I can dig it!”
Read: 200+ Dirt Puns That Will Leave You Rolling in the Soil
#gardening humor#dirty jokes#soil laughs#nature puns#plant lovers#witty puns#garden jokes#punny fun#earth humor#hilarious dirt jokes
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Mini crack
Lan: what else can you modify about yourself?
Mega: you mean other than my height?
Lan: yeah
Mega: well I can change the color of my suit, and take off my helmet
Lan: I know about those. I mean things I don't know about and I can't chan- I mean
Mega: you want to try override my modify program don't you? Well too bad it's so locked up only I can access it
Lan: I just wanna know what else you can do
Mega: that lie was so bad, even I can make something up better
Lan: Oh come on!
Mega: What else could you possibly want to change about me, other than my height?
Lan: I don't know, maybe your permanent humor program?
Mega: ...Permanent humor program?
Lan: Yeah? Isn't that why you pun all the time? You've got a humor program locked up in there don't you?
Mega: ...Lan, I don't have a humor program installed
Lan: Wait, so your lame puns are just a part of your actual personality?
Mega: THEY AREN'T LAME! Wait a minute...YOU THOUGHT MY JOKES WERE JUST PART OF THE HUMOR PROGRAM THE ENTIRE TIME?!
Lan: WHY WOULDN'T I THINK THAT?!
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4 cheers and 1 low energy grunt for Suncerto! Once the punny name came to mind I knew I had to make something for Sunflora. It keeps a lot of Sunflora's traits, so it's also a pure Grass with Chlorophyll and Solar Power, but replaces Early Bird with Natural Cure. I've also had an idea for all of the multi-headed mons out there with Bicker, a new move that makes all of them argue with each other and raises the user's lowest stat by +3, so the 30 base speed might be a little nyoomier than expected with that and Chlorophyll.
#pokemon#fakemon#sunkern#sunflora#sunflower#pixel art#original character#Silly Billy vs. the unmatched power of the sunflower
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care compassion love for others is way to happiness
Selfish self centred self is way to suffering
Happiness - See Elephant playing prank video
All suffering comes from seeking pleasure for self All happiness comes from seeking pleasure for others - Dr Devang H Dattani
Good Morning
See Video For elephant playing prank
Quote / Poem / Poetry / Quotes Of
Bhagwan Sri Sri Sri
Doctor Devang H Dattani
Infinite SriSriSri DDD
Posted By TheBlissCity DDD Team
See The Media Photo Video For
Quoteoftheday
God Morning
#suffering , #pleasure , #bliss , #TheBlissCity , #philosophy , #mindfulness , #DrDevangHDattani , #nature , #awareness , #InfiniteSriSriSriDDD , #quotes , #life , #art , #zen , #awakening , #quote , #spirituality , #photography , #Video , #meditation , #psychology , #poem , #poetry , #motivation , #inspiration , #quoteoftheday , #love , #words , #thoughts , #joy , #pun , #enlightenment , #health , #mental health , #consciousness , #good , #god , #life , #thoughts , #nirvana , #tantra , #yoga , #seeking , #happiness , #self , #others , #photooftheday , #panorama , #clouds , #sun , #video , #landscape , #elephant , #prank , #meme , #joke , #cute animals , #wild life , #memes , #video meme
#cozy#dark academia#cozycore#light academia#elephants#humor#elephant#comedy#artists on tumblr#spilled ink#naturecore#nature photography#wild animals#cute animals#cottagecore#witchblr#clouds#sky#jokes#funny memes#punny#photography#photooftheday#photographers on tumblr#joke#critical role#bliss#posing trunks#reblog
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This request is special to me because my first NSFW Alastor x Reader story on my sideblog was also about Alastor getting head 🤣 (Tell Me I'm Punny) I thought it be fitting/funny if my very first request story for this new blog would also be about Alastor getting head, -sighs- the beauty of ✨️sentimentality✨️ By the way, I took your request quite literally, if ya know what I mean 😏 XOXO, RedVexi💋
SUMMARY: You simply wanted to wake him up...in more ways than one.
WARNING/TAGS: f!reader, oral s*x (m!receiving), handjob, reader is a brat, teasing, established relationship, edging, ruined org*sm, dom/sub undertone, Alastor is not pleased
Like a deer caught in the headlights, you stared at Alastor’s sleeping visage, mesmerized by the sight. It was silly, but you felt an urge to wave your hand before his closed eyes to ensure he was truly asleep.
He lay on his back, lips stretched wide into a close-lipped smile, hands neatly folded one atop the other on his bare chest. His breath was soft and even, mirroring the tranquility of his expression.
For as long as you’d known Alastor, you had never once caught him sleeping. You had long assumed he was an eternal insomniac, his soul never craving or requiring rest – a restless soul, so to speak.
When you had asked him if he ever slept, he would only grin – his trademarked shit-eating grin – and he would pinch your cheeks while wiggling them before promptly changing the topic.
It drove you mad, for you didn’t understand the purpose of his secrecy on this subject.
You knew he was messing with you because he delighted in your curiosity, relishing the chase as you grew increasingly frustrated. Yet now, as your gaze rested on his sleeping figure, you had to suppress a laugh. Trust Alastor to fall deeply asleep only after an intense night of fucking you until you went delirious with pleasure.
Slowly, you sat up and winced at the ache in your backside, a vivid reminder of how he had relentlessly stretched your ass with his shadowy tendril while rubbing your core until you were an absolute sobbing mess. The memory of his touch, the way he played your body like a well-used instrument, sent a shiver down your spine. He was the master at blending the symphony of pain and pleasure that always left you breathless.
Pouting, you glared at Alastor as his body naturally sidled up closer to you, a comfortable sigh escaping his lips. He had promised that yesterday you could control the pace and make all the decisions from start to finish. But, of course, he couldn’t last five freaking minutes before he immediately started calling all the shots.
Even though he gave you mind-blowing orgasm after orgasm, it was the principle of the matter for you. You loved following his instructions in the bedroom, but sometimes you wanted to switch things up a bit – go a little off-script.
Nibbling on the inside of your cheek, a mischievous spirit took over your body, a small act of tomfoolery that you were sure Alastor would approve of if he wasn’t your unsuspecting victim.
Pressing your hand lightly on top of his abdomen, you felt the warmth of his body seep into your palm. Immediately, his muscles tensed, but he remained perfectly still, refusing to open his eyes.
Interesting.
With a wicked grin, you smoothed the planes of his stomach, letting your fingers brush against the fine line of hair leading down to his hips. His breathing hitched ever so slightly, a telltale sign that he was not as asleep as he pretended to be. As your hand continued to move south, you were promptly stopped when the tip of Alastor’s hardened member greeted you. You giggle softly at the prominent bulge he now displayed beneath the sheets.
Slipping the sheet off him, his cock twitched, anticipating your next move. As you positioned yourself between his legs, Alastor spread them, giving you full access to him however you wished to touch him.
“Looks like only half of you is up right now, Al,” you whispered, and you knew he heard you because you could see the ends of his lips twitching upwards. Yet, Alastor, the most stubborn man you had ever met, remained unmoving.
Well, that only worked in your favour considering what you had in store for him.
Bowing your head toward Alastor’s cock, you pressed a gentle kiss on its head, earning a jolt from him. His cock beckoned to enter your mouth as it continuously throbbed against your lips. Humming softly, your tongue peeked out, licking a strip down the length of him. Down, down, down you went until you gave him an open-mouthed kiss on his balls.
A small groan escaped above you, quiet, could almost be mistaken for a shuddering breath. Your hands stroke the sensitive skin of his inner thighs, earning a small jerk of his hip upwards as his cock twitched, wanting to be sheathed into a wet, warm space.
Instead of listening to his demands, you carefully suckled on his left ball, swirling it in your mouth before moving to the other. You took your time, slowly and agonizingly lapping him up, moaning as if you were singing a song of praise from the taste of him.
The points of Alastor’s claw grazed your scalp, earning him another wanton sound from you. As you slowly parted from him, his hands flexed, grabbing a fistful of your hair and dragging your head back to the tip of his cock.
You rolled your eyes at Alastor as you let him grind his hips against your mouth, feeling every ridge and the pull of his foreskin as he rubbed the sensitive tip against your moistened lips. His breath quickened, trying to stifle another quiet moan.
What an impatient man, you thought, deciding that now was the time to exact a small, harmless, vengeance for last night.
Your lips parted, ready to take him in, feeling the heat and firmness of his desire against your tongue. The taste of him, musky and addicting, filled your senses as you enveloped him. Your mouth slid down his length while your fingers wrapped around his base. Your tongue flattened as you felt the force from Alastor’s hand pushing your head down, urging you to take him deeper and deeper.
Moving your hands, you flattened them around the front of his hips, your fingers acting as a frame around his cock. Lower and lower you went, until the tip bumped against the back of your throat.
A louder, deeper, and almost feral growl resounded from above, and Alastor pulled on your hair to get back up until you were at the tip once more. Then, he surged his hips forward, slowly fucking your mouth as you hollowed your cheeks and sucked harder. You felt his thighs tense, his control slipping as he surrendered to the pleasure you were giving him.
The sound of wet slurps and the symphony of your moans and his groans filled the air. Faster and faster, he thrust, the thick, heady taste of his pre-cum slid down your throat. Your fingers drifted down to the taut skin of his balls, feeling them tighten.
You knew he was close.
He was so, very, close.
“Ah, darling –” The moment he called out to you, you immediately pulled your head away from his grasp – away from his weeping, throbbing cock.
Straightening your back, your hair an absolute mess, you stared at Alastor with bemusement dancing along your wet lips. His eyes were blown wide open, and it was almost comical how he looked before you. He was panting, his hands frozen midair where he had last grabbed your hair, and you could tell he was trying to process why you had stopped him from finishing.
His black, slit-like pupils slowly drifted down from the ceiling and landed on your eyes. “Darling,” he purred, his gaze lowering to his wanting, desperate cock before meeting your eyes once more. He gave you a grin, a silent dark warning that if you didn’t finish what you had started, he would make sure that you would do well to remember that from now on tonight.
Undeterred, you wiped away the saliva with the back of your hand before giving him a cheeky grin. “Good morning, Al!” You said in an overly saccharine and exaggerated cheerful tone. His eyes looked less than impressed. Slowly, you prowled up his body, ensuring that your bare, wet, sodden centre smeared against his cock, causing him to shudder. He gripped your hips, forcing you to stay there, to sit right on his cock.
His hardness pressed insistently against your entrance, and the heat between your legs was almost unbearable. You fought the urge to rock your hips, to rub your slick folds against his shaft because you knew that you were just a breath away from losing control and letting Alastor take his fill of you.
Alastor’s eyes darkened with lust and frustration. “You’re playing a dangerous game, darling,” he chuckled tonelessly, “a game you will lose.” He bared his sharp teeth as his claws dug into your hips.
“Something the matter?” you asked, tilting your head with an innocent tone, hardly trying to feign a believable act of ignorance. “Is there something you would like, Al?” Your tone shifted lower, and his eyes flashed with equal parts amusement and irritation.
“I would presume it would be quite obvious what I would want, darling,” his voice strained, yet he tried to keep an upbeat melody in his tone.
Tamping down your laughter, you tapped your lips, mocking the pose of someone deep in thought, before snapping your fingers. Leaning forward, you gave him a chaste kiss on his left cheek. “Did you have a good sleep?” You cooed as you let out a small giggle.
“I guess you do sleep after all!” You said before fully dissolving into bright laughter. You refused to move your body; you refused to rub yourself against him like an animal in heat, no matter how much your body unconsciously squirmed in his grasp.
Alastor’s grip on your hips tightened, his patience wearing thin. “You’re a cheeky little minx, aren’t you?” he growled, eyes darkening with desire.
With a mischievous grin, you leaned closer, your breath hot against his ear. “Maybe I am,” you whispered. “But you had your way last night, so today is my turn.”
Alastor’s lips brushed against your ear as he leaned closer to you, “And pray tell, darling, what is your way?” The heat between you was electric, and you could feel him straining, desperate for friction. “Come now, darling,” he murmured, his voice drenched with need. “Don’t tease me like this.”
“Hmm, maybe,” you paused, and the points of his claws dug in deeper, telling you to get on with it, “if you asked nicely, I might consider it.”
You felt his muscles stiffen before a low rumble resounded in his chest as he held back a dark chuckle. The bruising grip around your hips disappeared. With one hand resting on your back and the other caressing your face, he gave you a small, chaste kiss on your lips.
“Good morning, darling,” his voice took on its characteristic jovial tone, as if he wasn’t hard and wanting, as if you hadn’t just denied him of his sweet release. “I did have a good sleep, thanks for asking!” He gave you another chaste kiss on your lips. “I’m ready to start our day!” He rubbed the tip of his nose against yours, his eyes squinting to make way for his wide grin. “We best get a move on, for I have quite a full day planned for you.”
Suddenly, his eyes glowed a deep crimson red as he jutted his hips upward, letting you feel the heat and the hardened, silken skin of his cock. “Quite a full day, indeed,” his voice deepened, the radio filter crackling and popping in his tone.
You bit down on your lower lip, feeling the phantom pain across your ass cheeks and the coil of heat burning hotter in your core. You had a feeling that tonight, he was going to remind you exactly who was in charge.
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☎️ Calling all Vexi's Fawners and Smexy Fawners ☎️
@todash-darkness @im-so-tired52 @eris-norwega @pentergeist @sirens-and-moonflowers @l3rittany @alastor-simp @yui-onnero @florist-of-the-valley @ustulia @briethekitsune @mistressnya @nyx91 @xalygatorx @jeannyjaykaydeh @zxiiehda14u @pumppkinlynn @red-son-irl @reddisteddie @darling-dovey
#alastor x reader#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#ao3 writer#hazbin hotel fanfiction#ao3 fanfic#alastor#reader insert#fem reader#alastor x reader smut#alastor x oc#alastor x you#alastor hazbin#hazbin alastor x reader#alastor the radio demon#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor is in hell for a reason#alastor is hot#hazbinhotel#hazbin#hazbin hotel fanfic#hazbin fanfic#hazbin smut#alastor smut#hazbin hotel smut#smut writing#smut#hazbin hotel x reader#x reader
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Do you need some Vitamin D? (Incubus! William x Oblivious! F! Reader) [Part 1]
~Hi lovelies, I'm aware I have been a shitty author and disappeared for a long time, but I have been trying to get caught up with real life and honestly kinda hyper-fixated on minecraft for a week but I'm determined to write! I want to give you all the lovely things so here is an extremely belated Valentines Day fic about monstrous William Afton~
~Happy Valentines, Galentines, Pal-entines and fork-tines to you all! Today we're doing something a little bit silly and something very sweet in honour of the romantic day....A silly fic of monster William x oblivious reader, because let's face it, we all have at least one moment where flirting has gone straight over our heads and we missed the boat.~
@ruh--roh-raggy
CW: 18+ MINORS DNI. Fluff, age gap (Reader 20's - William Afton 40's(?)), teratophilia, meet-cute, punny pick-up lines, scenes of working out, minor porn-logic, ditzy! reader, could be classed as bimbo! reader?, size-difference, flirting, monster-lover, sexual innuendos, Monster! AU
William Afton ran his tongue over his teeth as he lost himself in thought once again. His silvery eyes watching you behind gold-framed aviators as you chatted with your co-workers, the blaring and beeping arcade lights casting colours against your skin in a way that made the older man suck a breath in through his teeth and click his tongue disapprovingly at himself. William had excellent control over himself both professionally and personally, there were plenty of times where his nature wanted to take hold of the reigns and control his actions but he rarely let them.
You were his little indulgence.
As the type of creature he was, it was hard to control obsessions and indulgences. Where did the lines cross? It had been years since he last let himself slip over the line and it had resulted in some unwanted agreements and commitments, a fact he was constantly reminded of whenever he received a letter from his thankfully former wife demanding reconciliation. She never knew the real him though, and William couldn't ever remember a person beside his best friend and his best friend's wife that had ever seen the real him. Just as he had seen the real them.
But as you turned and glanced at the older man leaning in the doorway into the 'employees only' corridor and gave him a little bright smile like always, he couldn't help his usually stern expression quirking at the corner of his mouth to return the smile slightly. You had that affect on the taller man, even if you were unaware of it or his perhaps less than selfless intentions behind it all.
You'd been working at Freddy Fazbear's pizza for just over two months, and in that time you'd made plenty of friends amongst the various members of staff. The cooks knew your break order and always happened to have an 'accidental' order of your favourite cheesy garlic sticks when you'd had a tough shift, people knew that they could rely on you to cover shifts when sick or that you actually knew where the first aid box was.
In general, people liked you, even if you were keenly aware of your one persistent flaw. You were...naïve, at times, and sometimes jokes and stories flew over your head whilst talking with other staff members. And sure, sometimes you'd had your female co-workers come up to you after some guy had talked to you and walked away looking dejected, only to be told they were flirting with you. But you weren't looking to change those things about yourself necessarily, and nobody ever said it was a bad thing that perhaps somebody who was interested in you would have to try a little harder to grab your attention.
"Afton's staring at you again." Your co-worker tutted, crossing her arms and making you look over towards him despite her hissed protests. Spotting the taller man with greying temples and those thin gold aviators that gave him a much more sophisticated look despite his yellow pin-stripe shirt that was a little baggy on his seemingly broad body. Giving him a friendly smile as he was indeed looking your way, seeing his usual frown twitch slightly as he nodded at you and shoved off from the wall, beginning to wander back into the halls of the pizzeria. "He's such a creep."
"He's not! Mr. Afton's lovely, maybe he's just shy?" You suggested, making the woman in front of you raise her eyebrow sceptically.
"Maybe if he was in high-school, he's a grown ass man, he should say something to you if he wants to say it!"
"Well, he and Mr. Emily do like to stand around and make sure everything is running smoothly. He's probably staring cause we're standing around." Shrugging your shoulders as your colleague shook her head and threw up her hands with an exasperated sigh.
"He's been staring at you for like....a month now? Anybody would think you were being sized up to be eaten or something. Or maybe he wants to fuck you." Wriggling her eyebrows suggestively, you smacked her arm and felt your cheeks heating up as you shook your head.
"Don't be silly! Or rude! Mr. Afton wouldn't think like that towards any of us, we're part of the Fazbear family!"
The young woman looked over at a couple of their co-workers sneaking kisses in the pass, with copious amounts of tongue like teenagers who had just discovered the concept of french-kiss and were delighted with the prospect. Shaking her own head as you wandered off to continue working, not wanting to disappoint your bosses.
"Yeah, perhaps a little more 'incestuous' than you realise though." Muttering under her breath as she trailed behind you, helping with the cleaning chores you both had to complete before the next dinner rush.
Meanwhile, William made his way into the offices at the back and made the man already inside jump slightly at his sudden entrance. His dark, short curls greying slightly and wearing an obnoxiously yellow shirt and brown slacks that made William's stomach turn slightly at how bright his friend was. Henry smiled at him from his desk and turned back to looking at the papers on his desk, allowing William to squeeze past and slip into his desk in the back.
The wooden top was cluttered with sheets of paper in neat stacks and animatronic parts in various spread states of disarray. Afton despised paperwork being out of place, but something that he deemed creative like his animatronics were fine to be in various messy states, art to him was supposed to be chaotic and messy. But his thoughts were distracted by that little smile you'd given him, running his thumb over his index nail repeatedly as he stared at his desk.
Henry noticed his silence and turned around in the swivel chair, facing his friend with a curiously raised eyebrow before scooting closer and forcing William to look up at the sound. Frown on his face as Henry broke out into a grin.
"You went out to look at that employee again didn't you?" Henry teased, making the taller man groan and rub his face under his glasses, jostling them from the comfortable position they had been in and forcing him to adjust them before he glared at Henry.
"None of your fuckin' business."
"Oh you did! And it our business! Do you think you might...pursue?" He asked, leaning on the edge of William's desk, making the other man sigh and shrug his broad shoulders as he averted his eyes back onto the projects on his desk.
"Been a while since I...Think I'm just an old bastard at this point." A slight smirk tugging at his lips as he watched Henry rolling his eyes, a huffing, snorting sound that William recognised as a more annoyed sound.
"Where did all your bravado go? Are you sure your previous wasn't a succubus or something? Sucked all the life out of you."
"Wouldn't that be fucking ironic. Must've been a vampire, drained me dry and not in the nice way either." Henry pulled a face and leaned over to smack William on the shoulder, the firm clap reminding William how strong Henry was despite his more slender frame and growing stomach from his wife's cooking.
Both men sat there for a moment before Henry sighed, running his fingers through his curls and shaking his head to dislodge the soft round ears from ontop of his head. Feeling his face getting slightly more full as his teeth pulled at his gums uncomfortably, blinking up at William who simply blinked back.
"Nearly new moon huh?"
"Yeah, it fucking sucks that I can't really leave the office or the house in case, but that's what I have my best friend and my wife for, huh?"
"Don't let your wife figure out they're separate titles." William chuckled, watching as Henry stretched his jaw and pawed at his face as he tried to encourage his more ursine features back into place.
"No way, I value my life and she will absolutely hand me my ass in silver bullets." Henry laughed and shook his head, looking back onto his own desk and spotting the poster for an upcoming event that made his face light up in an even brighter smile as he turned back to William. "You know what you should do?"
"What?"
"Ask her to the staff Valentine's staff-do!"
"Absolutely fucking not!"
"Come on, why?" He whined and William huffed, curling his lip up to reveal teeth a little too sharp to be human before he cleared his throat and cracked his neck, giving Henry a much more normal smile afterwards.
"It's so stupid, and plus, I need to refresh my skills, that takes time you know."
"Just go with what you've got! In fact, start today! Go out there and get flirting! If you don't have a date to that staff-do, I swear to god William, I'll bite you."
"Can't pass on the ursanthropy to me, Henry. But the thought of you biting me in any form is unpleasant." William sighed and stood up from his desk, watching Henry scooting back to his desk and rolling his eyes as he sighed.
Afton hated things like Valentine's Day, thought about all the overpriced flowers and chocolates that were out and about and the tacky foil decorations that would be used once and then ripped down within a day and never mentioned again. But Henry, annoyingly, was right about the fact that it was an opportune time to ask you out and flex his fingers with the charm a little.
It didn't take him long to find you, carrying piles of flat pizza boxes to make-up for takeout and humming slightly as you headed down the winding corridor, peeking over the top of the stack to see where you were going before a pair of hands reached out and took some of the boxes on the top.
"Let me get some of that for you, sweetheart." He chuckled, easily holding the boxes in his large hands and making you smile appreciatively, adjusting your grip on your own stack and feeling better that you could see where you were going and wouldn't run into anybody.
"Thanks Mr.Afton! I hope this isn't too much trouble." Watching as William shrugged and chewed over his lip, glancing over you briefly.
"It's no trouble, hey! Do you like raisins?" He asked suddenly, making you pause as you mulled over the question.
"I mean...I'm not keen?"
"Then how about a date?" William grinned from ear to ear, watching your expression gleefully as you blinked up at him.
"I mean..I might like them? Haven't tried raisins in years, I might have to try them again. Thanks for helping Mr. Afton!" You smiled, wandering through the corridor and towards the front of the restaurant once again, not aware of the flabbergasted look on her boss' face as he stared after you.
You weren't sure what had changed the next day when you came in for your shift, early as always and humming to yourself when you cleaned up. Henry Emily and William Afton came in through the front door, silence between them as you noticed that Henry had a pair of dark sunglasses on despite the early morning light and William had on a tight black t-shirt and jeans, looking more like a biker with a bit of a dad-bod going on. Blinking in surprise as neither of them were really dressed in the professional attire you were used to them being in.
"Good morning Mr. Emily, Mr. Afton!" You called out, causing both men to stop and turn their attention towards you. Afton looking at you with that stern expression he always had whilst Henry attempted a smile, although it fell quickly and settled back into a slightly pained look, causing your brow to furrow with concern.
"Ah, morning," your name was added quietly onto the end, Henry reaching up and rubbing his hand over his face. Secretly checking himself for any subtle transformations, William glancing at him from the corner of his eye before turning his attention back to you. "How goes set-up?"
"Well Mr. Emily, although...are you okay? You look a little sick and tired today. Maybe you should be at home?" Voice laden with concern and head tilted slightly as you watched Henry, managing to miss William's slight smile at your concern for his friend. Henry shaking his head and shrugging his shoulders lightly.
"Ah, yeah just not been sleeping well. Not sweet enough dreams perhaps." Trying to put some humour back into his voice as William lit up and decided to try out another technique on you, feeling his face settling into a confident smirk once more as he looked you over. Somehow you made even the uniform look cute.
"Not like you, hey sweetheart? You're sweet and a dream." You turned to look at him as the much taller man spoke, the same blank expression on your face for a moment before you laughed and shook your head shyly, averting your gaze from his silvery eyes. Wondering if you had ever been so close to him, other than when he picked up the pizza boxes for you.
"You're too nice Mr. Afton, I really just try to be myself." Shaking your head and not noticing as Henry scowled at William from the side, shaking his own head and rolling his eyes behind the sunglasses. "Well, I better get back to work, please take care of yourself today Mr. Emily, and please look after him Mr. Afton." Giving each of the older men a smile before turning back to your duties and allowing them to move on. Still curious as to why they were dressed less formally.
Henry all but grabbed William and dragged the taller man into the back areas and to their cramped little office. Both men staring down as Henry took off his sunglasses and revealed his more yellowish green eyes, the pupils blown out as he struggled to keep himself full in check as the new moon was only a day away. Holding onto his friend's thick arms for a moment before crossing his against his chest, foot tapping impatiently as he had to look slightly up to see William's face.
"What the actual fuck was that?"
"What was what, Henry?" William asked coyly, smirking as the werebear before him huffed and growled in annoyance. Narrowing his eyes as Henry gestured back out towards the main floor where you were.
"THAT! Was that you flirting?"
"Yeah? Girls love that shit, just cause you get that whole 'mate' thing doesn't mean everybody does buddy." William rolled his eyes and crossed his own thicker arms across his broad chest, staring down at the smaller man as he shook his head. Henry running his fingers through his dark curls for a moment as an exasperated sigh escaped him.
"When did girls like that, the eighteen-hundreds?"
"Watch it, and it was the eighties as you well know."
"Either way, you're an old bastard."
"Shut the fuck up, Emily." William growled, his own teeth changing slightly as his lip curled and revealed sharper canines than before. His own monstrous nature leaking through his carefully held together image before Henry blinked and he was back to normal.
Both men headed off into the offices, Henry still shaking his head and glancing at William with a sense of disbelief. His friend was loosing his touch and honestly, he wasn't sure what he could do to rectify the situation without being blunt and to the point which would entirely ruin William's whole thing.
"You're possibly the world's worst incubus, William Afton." Henry muttered under his breath, making William snort and smirk in return as the office door opened and he allowed his features to shift slightly. Sharp teeth, flatter more squashed nose and nails sharper as greyish brown fur started to creep down the back of his neck and onto his forehead, mixing into where his salt and pepper hair normally was neatly swiped back.
"Says you, I'm just getting started." His features turning back to normal as he shook his head. Cracking his neck and rolling his shoulders as the monster once against became the man.
Your phone buzzed on the bedspread as you sat eating cereal in bed and watching some true-crime programme that had come on when you turned on the TV. Almost missing the soft sound before you reached for it and tapped the screen with your thumb to light it up, pausing as you saw it was a text notification and heart pounding slightly as you saw the name attached to it.
William Afton.
Tapping it open, you wondered if perhaps he was asking you to cover the shift the next day, since you had a couple of days off. Although it was usually Henry who reached out and he never texted, always phoned since it was 'more professional'. He had looked sick earlier, so it wasn't out of the realms of possibility that he was handing over the responsibility to William to try and limit how much stuff Henry himself had to do. You paused as the text loaded after a moment and your eyes instantly landed on a photo of William.
It took you a moment to register. But it looked like it had been taken from around waist height and pointed up his body, his greying hair slicked back and wet like he'd just gotten out of the shower, those gold wire aviators catching the light but still able to see his grey eyes and his greying beard. His broad chest was covered in a tight purple shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbow, the first three buttons undone and letting you see a touch of his dark chest hair that you somehow never realised you knew would be there.
Confused, you looked at the text that came afterwards, your eyes straying back up to the picture occasionally as you tried to figure out what on earth was going on.
'What do you think to the new shirt?' Still confused, you balanced the bowl of cereal on your lap before texting back, thinking on what to reply as you scanned the picture one more time before your fingers moved across the keyboard.
'It's a nice colour on you Mr. Afton. Did you mean to send this to me though?' Turning back to eating cereal and watching the TV for only a moment before your phone buzzed again and you looked at his name popping up on the screen once more, tapping on it to read as you chewed over your next mouthful.
'Shit, really sorry, this was meant for Henry. Thanks for your feedback though.' You tried for a moment to think how your name might end up next to Henry Emily's in his contacts but didn't think too hard about it, popping another spoonful into your mouth before texting back, wanting to reassure the older man that it was a simple mistake.
'It's no problem, I'm not doing anything at the moment anyway. Was just surprised that you texted me.'
A few minutes passed before your phone vibrated again, and you were welcome to the distraction since the programme had become kind of boring and predictable, it was clear who was the murderer and anything was better than the cliche music and dramatic cuts on the screen.
'Not doing anything? A young lady like you should be out and about! I'm curious as to what type of nothing you're up to now though.' The text made you laugh and shake your head, chuckling as you texted back quickly. You weren't sure what it was about the text exchange with William Afton, but it was enjoyable and you couldn't help the involuntary scroll up in the chain of texts to look at the photo again whilst you waited for his reply after your own.
'Sat in bed, eating cereal and watching TV. Really nothing exciting Mr. Afton. I can imagine your evening is more exciting than mine.'
'Well that rather depends on your definition of exciting. What would you be up to if you didn't have the cereal?' A strange question, but you shrugged and replied in the only way that came to mind. Totally unaware that William Afton was across town and laid in his own bed as soon as you mentioned being in yours, a small smirk on his face with one hand tucked up behind his head as he thought it was genius to potentially lure you into a salacious conversation.
'Get up and get cereal :p'
Your reply left his blinking at his screen and he turned his head to look at the floor length mirror across the room, seeing his more monstrous face staring back at him. Soft bunny ears folded back across his head and covered in a fine layer of salt and pepper fur. His large figure spread out across the bed, his clawed fingers running over his head and flatter face, nose twitching as his now pale purple eyes stared back behind his glasses. The bedding up to his waist hiding most of his transformations, tucking his knees up and curling up his lip to reveal his sharp teeth as his foot stamped in annoyance against the mattress. Crossing his arms around himself in a motion of comfort. The lagomorphic incubus was beginning to doubt his own abilities and he didn't like that.
What was it about you that resisted him so easily? He wasn't entirely sure, but he thought it might have something to do with the fact you had always seemed to have a few things...go over your head, to put it politely. Chewing on his lip as he looked at himself once again in the mirror before he closed his eyes and tapped his head back against the headboard, frustrated that it wasn't going exactly to plan.
Unaware of your boss' frustration, you gave up waiting for him to say something back, glancing at the clock and wondering if perhaps he had simply fallen asleep. But you had a small smile that he had talked to you for so long, and wondered if he had enjoyed the conversation too. Putting the dirty bowl on your nightstand to be cleaned up in the morning and sighing as you settled back into bed.
Scrolling back up, you couldn't help one last look at the picture he had sent, cheeks flushing with heat as you shook your head, tossing the device to one side as you rubbed your face. Wondering what on earth had gotten into you that you kept going back to look at your boss and admire the little features of his face.
#william afton#william afton x reader#springtrap#steve raglan#steve raglan x reader#fnaf movie#springtrap x reader#william afton smut#william afton x you#fnaf x reader#monster au#monster william afton#monster henry emily#incubus
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All AAI2 official English character and case names rated based on whether I think they're better or worse than the fan translation equivalents:
Di-Jun Huang > Di-Jun Wang - It's the same.
Horace Knightley > Bronco Knight - Worse.
Ethan Rooke > Bastian Rook - Worse.
Nicole Swift > Tabby Lloyd - Much better.
Raymond Shields > Eddie Fender - Slightly worse.
Jay Elbird > Rocco Carcerato - Much better.
Simon Keyes > Simeon Saint - Slightly worse.
Sebastian Debeste > Eustace Winner - Sounds worse, fits better.
Justine Courtney > Verity Gavèlle - Much better.
Sirhan Dogen > Bodhidharma Kanis - Much better.
Patricia Roland > Fifi Laguarde - Much better, they've already done "patrol" twice.
Jeff Master > Samson Tangaroa - More unique, less punny. Not sure.
Katherine Hall > Judy Bound - Slightly worse because no food pun.
Isaac Dover > Artie Frost - References his nature as an artist, better.
Pierre Hoquet > Paul Halique - Same as Japanese name, no longer parrot.
Dane Gustavia > Carmelo Gusto - Worse, doesn't sound as awesome.
Delicia Scones > Delicia Scone - It's the same.
Karin Jenson > Florence Niedler - Much better. Florence Nightingale and needles.
Bonnie Young > Hilda Hertz - Better, because alliterative.
Jill Crane > Rosie Ringer - Better, alliterative. Different nursery rhyme.
Blaise Debeste > Excelsius Winner - The absolute Winner among these names. It's so pompous, contains "celsius" and "excel" and just sounds like he went to Oxford.
John Marsh > Shaun Fenn - It's the same. Shaun means John and fen means marsh.
Amy Marsh > Amelie Fenn - It's the same.
Dai-Long Lang > Da-Long Lang - It's the same.
Jack Cameron > Alf Aldown - Better, only because it's a Deid Mann tier awful name rather than a boring realistic name.
Turnabout Target > Turnabout Trigger - Better, sounds more like a presidential assassination attempt.
The Imprisoned Turnabout > The Captive Turnabout - Better, less long-winded.
The Inherited Turnabout > Turnabout Legacy - Better for same reason as above.
The Forgotten Turnabout > A Turnabout Forsaken - Sounds more pretentious, but probably better because less confusion with The Lost Turnabout, where Phoenix forgets.
The Grand Turnabout > Turnabout for the Ages - Worse, I think. It sounds cooler, but doesn't have any chess connotations. They should have called it "The Grandmaster's Turnabout" or "Turnabout Checkmate", I think.
Also, have updated case cards to help you get used to the new names.
EDIT;
Some extra things:
* iFly Airlines in AAI1 has been reverted to its Japanese name of "GoYou". This was probably done because iFly is the name of a real Russian airline with global sanctions against it since 2022.
* As a result, Hugo Ifly is now Ugo Hughes and the tanuki called Mr. Ifly is now Captain Ugo.
* Moozilla is now Taurusaurus, which I think is a better name.
* The Grand Tower is now the Bigg Building, suggesting that Big is not merely its size, but a Mr. Bigg is its proprietor.
* The Zodiac Hall galleries are now referred to as seasonal "Wings" rather than "Palaces". Makes more sense.
* Edgeworth Law Offices is now referred to as Edgeworth and Co. Law Offices, the Co. being Eddie Fender (aka Ray Shields). Again, makes more sense.
* Rocky the bear is now Teddy, since his owner is now already Rocco as a Rocky reference.
* Anubis the hunting dog is now Helmut, a lame pun on "hell mutt".
* Astique the elephant is now Azea, like an "Asian" elephant.
* Ally the alligator is still the same. Regina Berry is not very good at naming animals.
#ace attorney investigations#ace attorney#aai2#aai2 spoilers#miles edgeworth#localization#taurusaurus#excelsius winner
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