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rosewater-chlxe · 4 years

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matter of time | ashton irwin

✖ Summary: After a reckless night of finally leaving your toxic relationship, you roamed the street searching for some kind of hope. That’s when you stumbled across a car with a certain hazel-eyed stranger and took a chance; throughout a now much warmer moment in time, you learned his name: Ashton.

✖ genre ; fluff, comfort, angst (happy ending)

✖ warnings ; mention of abuse/manipulation

✖ requested - yes | no

a/n: this is heavily inspired by ‘drive’ & matter of time (interlude) on superbloom, and written for comfort <3

masterlist

The sound of your apartment door slamming felt almost relieving, yet somehow still reckoning in your blur of a mind; as every memory started flashing like headlights in the corners of your head, your vision became less and less useful. Those saltwater tears falling from your cluttered eyelashes started hitting the cold pavement below you as you felt a piece of you shatter within each step you took.

You checked the time on your phone, 2am. 12 unread texts, 4 unanswered calls. You wanted to run, but where would you go? You wanted to drop the phone held in your hand and make the screen unreadable. You wanted to take a flight back home, but with what cash, with what luggage?

The words that terrible, monstrous man had spoken echoed in your ears like a broken record; Your now ex-boyfriend.

After all that time of him telling you that you aren’t good enough; that you need to listen to his every single syllable, every dreadful sentence he dare spoke, you finally left. All of that heartache and rage for what? Every night alone, every day stuck in his shadow, only as a silhouette; every time you looked in the mirror to see nothing but shades of violet, yellow and blue on your skin. Every single breath you took was held in, and now your lungs aren’t sure of how to handle all of the fresh air.

You didn’t have your mind set on moving to California, but that night terror of a man made every single decision. You wanted nothing more than to take a breather and sit at your actual home for a while before the move, but it was almost instant. The apartment with him was never a home; barely a living space.

The street you walked upon was empty of people; only houses with their lights off. Quickly you noticed a car behind you, playing music at the loudest volume. The car pulled into the driveway ahead of you; there were two people left in the car, but only one left the front passenger seat. A dark haired man wearing a green hoodie with the word ‘empathy’ written on the front entered the house as the car backed out of the driveway once more.

Though when the car backed out, the driver waited. You cautiously continued walking and as you were about to pass the car, the passenger seat window rolled down all the way. You stopped and looked in to see a stranger with the kindest smile you had ever laid your eyes upon; the man had dark, wavy, medium length hair and hazel eyes. He was dressed in a satin, black button down shirt with black jeans that had rips near his knees.

You were timid and incredibly cautious as you took a quick look around in his car, searching for any warning signs or red flags; you found not a single one. You glanced at the paused song on what was most likely his playlist. Lullaby by The Cure.

Finally, as the man before you speaks, you snap out of your own thoughts.

“I apologize if I seem like some creepy lingerer, but I seen you walking by yourself and it’s 2am,” he spoke, “are you okay?” he questioned with a kind, welcoming tone. You watched his eyes glance at the tear stains covering your cheeks, and you noticed his eyebrows slightly furrow.

“My name is Ashton by the way, and It’d be no problem to take you where you need to go,” he said followed by a small pause, “though if it would make you more comfortable I can call my friend Sierra to help,” he finished.

Your exterior softened as you realized you had no reason to even have the smallest concern about this so-called Ashton, realizing he’s a genuine person just by the few sentences he’s said to you.

“Are you sure? I could just walk by myself, I’m sure you need to get home-” you questioned before he quickly interrupted,

“Positive. I wouldn’t want anyone wandering the streets of California this late, hop in!” he enthusiastically answered, making sure you felt as if you could trust him.

You entered the car, feeling more comfortable than you ever had in the apartment though you were next to someone you had never met before. The aroma in the car was coming from Ashton himself, his cologne so vibrant in scent that in lingered wherever he was; your senses were filled with the smell of dozens of flowers in the sunshine during the summer. The scent was the first thing that had given your soul warmth for what felt like the first time in years.

“Thank you for being so kind, it truly does mean the world to me,” you said to him in a genuine tone with a sigh of relief, “I’m Y/N.”

“What might you be up to walking around here at 2am, Y/N?” he asked as you watched him turn his right turn signal on, glancing over you with a slight smile.

“That’s a very long, dreadful story,” you said with a hint of bitterness and forced laughter, still being sweet as you smiled at him.

He smiled with a bit of sorrow in his eyes, realizing something bad must have happened. He studied your facial expression and body language for any signs to find a light, almost unnoticeable bruise on your wrist as well as your timidly fingers dancing upon one another when he asked; he had a slight frown as you fidgeted.

“I don’t know what happened and I’m sure it’s none of my business, but I’d like you to know that you aren’t alone though it may feel that way. It’s the sappy shit everyone says and I don’t know if you wanna hear it, but it does get better with time. You just gotta give it a chance y’know?” he said to you in now a more calming, comforting tone.

You felt tears well up in your eyes once more, not remembering what this kindness felt like; it was completely unfamiliar to you, yet it made you feel like you were home.

“Thank you, Ashton. You’re a very lovely human being,” you said to him with a soft smile, “to sum up the entire thing, I have- had been with someone who wasn’t the best, or wasn’t really good at all to me for way longer than I should’ve been. People always underestimate how hard it can be to leave situations like that.”

He let out a soft sigh as he stopped at the red light in front of you; he tapped on the steering wheel as he thought carefully of what to say. He adjusted his bracelet before turning to face you; it was dark, so he decided not to comment on the outline of tears falling from your cheeks.

“I know that what happened in the amount of time you were with him couldn’t have been easy, probably quite difficult -- and though you don’t deserve going through what you did nor should it have happened, painful lessons can be the perfect tool to grow; to proceed to the next better chapter of your life.” He said to you, truly believing what he was saying rather than just telling you things for reassurance.

You could almost feel the liquid gold that flooded through his veins; the flowers that bloomed in his lungs as he took each breath. Those raven curls fell perfectly along his forehead and right above his eyes, creating such a highly-saturated feeling as you lingered in his atmosphere.

“You’re a beautiful person,” you accidentally let out the repeating sentence in your head, “I mean you’re very sweet,” you attempted to fix your slip up through clumsily placed stutters.

Ashton chuckled with a bright smile on his face, and you could feel every sunbeam exuding from his emotions. His hazel eyes were the softest you’d ever seen, yet they had such potential to be utmost intimidating.

“I think you’re admirable as well, Y/N,” he replied with the sweetest of honey in his tone.

As he pulled into his driveway, reality set in once again. He carefully studied your reactions to see any hesitance or uneasiness.

“Remember, if you aren’t comfortable staying at my place, Sierra lives a few streets away and it wouldn’t be a bother at all to take you there,” he warmly reminded you.

“You’re the nicest person I’ve ever met, I promise I’m comfortable; you are, right?” You responded with a small smile, awaiting his reply.

“Of course,” he nodded, getting out of the car and opening your door.

When you finally entered the well-lit home, you noticed a variety of things: the instruments, the little vintage musical references scattered along the walls, the open notebook sitting on the coffee table; every little trinket revealing more of his personality. You also finally got a more in-detail look of his features. You noticed his tattoos, and as you closely examined each one you yearned knowing the story behind them; you took note of his laid-back demeanor and the smooth ways in which he carried himself.

“You’re a songwriter?” You questioned, hoping your analysis was correct.

“I am actually, more of a drummer though,” he joked, making you let out a light laugh. “Would you like anything to drink or eat? I can grab some more comfortable clothes for you if you’d like?” he considerately asked, giving you a warm smile.

“I would love that, thank you so much; and a water would be great,” you timidly replied, tapping the ends of your fingertips nervously.

“Of course, is there anything else you need? Do you wanna talk about anything?” he asked in a very sweet, quiet tone as he noticed your anxiety.

“Thank you so much, I’m honestly just really exhausted,” you stated, knowing you were actually quite awake; you just needed to let everything out alone as always.

“I understand darling, there’s a spare bedroom upstairs -- I’ll go get the clothes, just make yourself at home,” he kindly said to you, internally questioning your stability. He noticed every single flinch and facial expression of sorrow; this, let alone, filled him with devastation.

You made your way up the stairs, passing photographs on the wall of him and three other men; one of them being the man you seen get out of his car earlier that night. You faintly heard Ashton open the fridge and grab a water, knowing he’d be coming up with you soon. You stopped your curious gazing and entered the spare bedroom; It was mostly empty with a few light decorations, a nightstand, a dresser, and a bed with pale green, silk sheets. You sat down and patiently awaited his arrival, looking down at your swaying legs.

You heard his light footsteps as he entered the room with a small smile on his face, handing you cozy clothing and a water; he gave you an oversized, black hoodie and grey sweatpants. The clothes smelled of his cologne, which brought you some sort of unexplainable comfort.

“If you need absolutely anything, I’ll be right downstairs, okay? Have a lovely sleep, sweet dreams,” he softly spoke, leaving the room and carefully shutting the door behind him.

As quickly as the door closed, tears began to overflow in your eyes; streams of the coldness you felt in your once known monster’s arms went down your cheeks like rivers. The ache in your chest felt like no other; you felt empty and severely heavy at the same time. The room was silent, but the static in your body became blaringly and deafeningly loud. You wanted to scream so hard that your vocal cords would no longer make a sound, and by the silent sobs you produced it was almost as if you did.

Then it stopped.

The static stopped playing, and you were brought back to the moment you were in rather than the past; you heard faint acoustic guitar strings that sounded like a home you’d never felt. You heard singing, but the lyrics through the walls weren’t as clear as you wanted. You heard the raindrops from outside mixed with Ashton’s honey-drenched voice, and that let alone turned every single tear filled with sorrow into softly spilled tears of rosewater.

You sat up from the now wet pillow, and changed into the clothing he offered you. You carefully opened the bedroom door and sat down on one of the stairs, listening from just the wall keeping the two of you distanced.

He sang,

“From the ground up, don't you burn it down Everybody's got the chance to turn it around Rebuild it like a vase, or a shattered crown Dive into the ocean and you'll never drown Darkness shows up, don't you let it grow The light will shine in, then your heart will know That all of these things That cause us pain inside Will come and go When the roses bloom and the record don't scratch Close your eyes, don't you ever look back Painful lessons are a perfect tool Schools in session and the number one rule It’s all just a matter of time,”

after he finished the last few lines, he set down the guitar and wrote down the last few words he sang in his notebook. At this time, you were now leaning against the doorframe admiring his every thought being expressed through the look in his hazel eyes.

“You’re very talented,” you softly spoke not to startle him; though still, for a second, he had wide eyes as he glanced up at you.

“I thought you were asleep,” he lightly laughed, “I’m sorry if I’ve waken you.”

“Not at all,” you smiled to quickly reassure his concerns, “I’m exhausted, but I don’t think sleep is an option,” you admitted; “Honestly, the most calming thing I’ve heard in years is what I just did.”

You watched as the heat on his face began to match your own; suddenly, an idea came to his head.

“I hope this isn’t crossing a boundary or anything, but if you’d like, you could lay down next to me? I mean, I could continue if you’d want that.” He timidly asked, looking for any hesitance in your demeanor. All he seen was a glimpse of hope in your eyes as you joined him on the sofa.

You laid your head down on the opposite side, almost curling up into a ball. As he started playing the first few notes and singing the opening lyrics, you already felt yourself peacefully drift off into sleep. You felt safe. You felt warm, and secure. The newness of every single little feeling in your heart made it’s way to every corner of your body as you had your last conscious thoughts.

A few minutes after Ashton realized you had fallen asleep, he couldn’t resist the sweet smile spreading across his face. He softly set the guitar down and grabbed the blanket laying on the couch, covering you up with it. He placed a gentle kiss on your head and started walking out of the room, but stopped when he reached the doorframe.

He turned around once more and sighed to himself. He glanced at the staircase then back at you; he shook his head in disbelief of his emotions, and laid down with you.

“You’re gonna be the death of me, Y/N.”

fin.

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cheri-translates · 4 years

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[CN] Kiro’s R&S - Youthhood (Eng Translation)

🍒This R&S (少年时代) was part of the Dream Heart Lake event which will unlikely come to EN🍒

Cancelled Kiro’s R&S:

> top experimental subject (by another user)

> stunning young idol

> youthhood ♡

> heaven’s home for children (by another user)

[ Chapter 1]

Kiro sits on the highest flight of steps of TKTS. With the scorching sun directly overhead, he’s queuing to purchase discounted tickets to “Wicked” with Pei En.

TKTS, which sells discounted tickets, is located in the bustling Times Square in New York, USA. Behind it is the NASDAQ screen, and on both sides are shops selling Disney products and all sorts of fast fashion brands. The buildings in front and in the surroundings have gigantic, neat and pretty advertisements.

Among them, a gigantic “The Avengers” poster above the subway is the most attention grabbing.

This is a representation of the era. It’s a symbol of the 20th century, and is also similar to the cyberpunk world of “Blade Runner”.

“I’ve got the tickets!”

Pei En waves the two tickets to “Wicked” in his hand. Pei En is the guitarist in his band. Kiro’s agency formed a band for him, and most of the band members are French locals. Only Pei En is of mixed blood like Kiro - a child from a Jew and an Asian.

“If the performance had gone smoothly, we would have reached earlier!”

They have a final performance in New York as part of their tour, and would have to leave after, rushing to Los Angeles, California.

“This time, I’m going to hide the donuts in an even more secret location so the person who inspects the tickets wouldn’t discover them!”

While Kiro says this, he finishes the donut in his hand.

Donuts from Dunkin’ Donuts are very sticky. Only Kiro can treat such things as delicacies.

His ringtone sounds. With a glance at the number on the screen, he hangs up immediately. Pei En is very curious to know who the caller is. He has expressed curiosity regarding everything involving Kiro, and Kiro knows why.

“Is it that fellow Lawrence again?” Pei En asks. Lawrence is the agent of their band.

“Nope, but it’s definitely a harassment call.”

“It should be.”

Pei En seems to be a carbon copy of Kiro. Aside from his hair not being golden coloured, he is extremely similar to Kiro in terms of bubbliness and openness, and how simple-minded he is.

[ Chapter 2 ]

After purchasing the tickets, both of them return to the agency. Lawrence is at the side, looking through the program booklet for their performance tonight. Lawrence is overwhelmingly ambitious. He won’t give up until he bags a Grammy Award for the band.

“Did you know? Another group of strange people came to look for you again.”

The moment Lawrence sees Kiro, he pulls the latter to a corner. Pei En curiously watches on.

“What kind of people did you provoke? They look like they shouldn’t be trifled with.”

Kiro shakes his head. “What do you mean by ‘they’? Fans?”

When Lawrence sees the innocent and harmless expression on Kiro’s face again, he knows that his questions wouldn’t get him anywhere. Kiro always manages to find ways to conceal himself.

“How’s the preparation for the concert? You’re the lead singer, and all the girls are flocking here for you!”

“I’ll definitely perform even better than usual!”

Kiro looks to be full of zest and in high spirits. He genuinely loves being on stage, and loves how he radiates brilliance. Who doesn’t like seeing fans go into a frenzy over them and be captivated by them? It enables Kiro to fully feel that he is still living on this earth. And that on this earth, there are still so many people who like him...

“I’m guessing you went to buy a souvenir again today.”

Lawrence comes to such a conclusion after glancing at Kiro’s bag. Kiro has a hobby - to buy some souvenirs wherever he goes, whenever convenient.

From Paris to Munich, Zurich to Stockholm, Vancouver to Montreal - wherever he goes on tour, he would buy local fridge magnets and postcards, and he would always buy two sets.

He wants to collect these things, so if a day comes when he can meet her again, he would show them to her, and say:

“Look! This world is so beautiful, and you no longer have to be afraid.”

But till now, he has yet to find her. He remembers her eyes. One day, he will find her in a vast sea of people.

“Did you know that the agency from China has sent someone to negotiate with us? They want you to sign on with them, and the amount they’re giving you is basically--”

Lawrence’s tone is exaggerated. “How are people in China so wealthy!”

“What if I said that I wanted to go to China?”

“Hey, buddy, the band can’t do without you.”

“Haha, Pei En is much more outstanding than I am.”

At this point, Pei En is still watching them. Kiro understands him too well. He’s much too curious. Also, he’s only curious about Kiro, which could very quickly expose Kiro’s hidden identity.

Did that group of people actually send Pei En to monitor him...

He kind of underestimates Pei En though.

“But that fellow is always so absent-minded. God knows what he’s thinking about.”

[ Chapter Three ]

Americans enjoy overstating things. At one moment, they go “only God knows...”, and at another moment, they go “for the sake of God...”. Some people can’t stand it, but Kiro finds it very interesting.

Very quickly, Kiro begins rehearsing with the band. His style of singing changes a lot. When they were in Europe, they mostly played rock music. When they reached America, they started playing country or jazz music.

Kiro likes the southern accent of the keyboardist from California. But Lawrence prohibits it. “The southern accent is the most crude and coarse form of English! Why can’t you learn the way the British speak?”

Lawrence has always favoured people who can speak eloquent British English - to him, only such people are refined and elegant. But Kiro grew up in France. When he first started learning English, he tended to pronounce “ch” as “sh”. Actually, French is genuinely elegant and pleasant to listen to. And English tinged with a slight French accent can make one absorbed in it.

The concert ended smoothly.

The fans are cheering in a frenzy outside, wanting them to perform one more song. But the agent has already told them to leave.

Pei En and Kiro take a car and rush to the theatre to watch “Wicked”. This is the final Broadway show they want to watch, and it was a shame that Kiro didn't get to watch the well-known Hamilton.

At the entrance, that group of fellows stopped him again.

The person standing at the forefront is a Caucasian woman. She walks up to Kiro elegantly and greets him, signalling for the person next to her to bring Pei En away.

“I’ve already given you a response through e-mail, and I hope you won’t disturb me again.”

The Caucasian woman proceeds as usual, showing him an FBI ID.

Kiro grumbles in his heart.

“I swear I won’t disclose the contents of ‘The Avengers’. Even though I’ve already watched it on my laptop, I’ll definitely watch it again in the cinema!”

The Caucasian woman laughs.

“Mr Kiro, you’re very humorous. Even though we know that apart from Disney, you’ve also hacked into Universal Studios and Paramount Pictures, we’re not here to talk about this.”

She continues: “KEY - that’s you, isn’t it?”

[ Chapter 4 ]

Kiro doesn’t respond, his eyes widening as he glances around.

“In order to track down your IP address, we had to destroy four computers.”

“Are you looking for me to make compensation for the computers?”

“Mr Kiro. Ten years ago, you expended no effort to hack into our computers, and left behind a string of mysterious characters.”

The Caucasian woman smiles at him amiably. Kiro’s expression grows serious. Ten years ago, that KEY who hacked into their organisation wasn’t him...

“Ten years later, you’re back again. I think you're trying to provoke us.”

“I don’t have such an intention.”

“Whether or not you do, we can’t let you continue this way. Mr Kiro, this is a serious issue. We are now sending you a sincere invitation, and we hope to work together to do more noble things.”

Kiro is silent. He had previously found a clue leading to his own master. Finding out that he had entered the American FBI website and left behind a series of symbols - he thinks this is message to him from his master. As such, he entered it as well, and found that series of symbols, but until now hasn’t been able to decipher it.

It’s a series of very strange symbols, reminiscent of a new language formed using Latin and Roman symbols. He managed to decipher it a little, and it appears that the series of symbols seem to be pointing him to a location.

And the FBI had found him quickly, sending him an e-mail. It was a solemn reminder that if he was unwilling to be enlisted by them, he would lose his rights to use a computer forever.

“You’ve stated these things clearly in the e-mail, and I’ve already replied.”

“I don't think you have considered the severity of this matter. Mr Kiro, we can detain you.”

"In that case, I’ll just sing in jail then!”

Seeing the displeased look on the Caucasian woman’s face, Kiro continues smiling simple-mindedly.

“I hope you wouldn’t regret this in the future.” The Caucasian woman leaves a final statement that is often found in a script for a classic villain. She leaves with the large group of people.

Pei En walks over frantically, and Kiro walks towards him as well.

“Tell them that I’ve met with some trouble, and will need to leave America immediately.”

Pei En pretends to be puzzled.

“You understand the meaning in my words, don’t you?”

For the first time, Kiro looks at him seriously. During serious moments, he doesn’t smile.

“Where do you plan to go? We can send you to Russia.”

Pei En is no longer smiling. His expression changes, along with his entire aura.

As expected, Pei En is much too similar to him. If Kiro were to leave the band, Pei En could take over his position as the lead singer, and that group of people had considered this fact too.

[ Chapter 5 ]

The face of the little girl surfaces in Kiro’s mind again.

The girl is lying with him, and is all smiles as she looks at him.

“Don’t be afraid. When I’m out, I’ll buy you donuts, okay?”

The girl draws the shape of a donut in the air.

Back then, Kiro didn’t speak. He just stared at the ceiling in a dazed state.

“Don’t worry that I won’t have enough money. My dad will give it to me.”

Kiro remains wordless, quietly listening to the little girl speak.

The little girl struggles to pull on his hand.

Their fingers lace together, the warmth from her palm gradually coursing into Kiro’s heart.

“Don’t be afraid. I’ll protect you.”

Kiro turns to look at her - to look at her determined brown eyes, to look at how the corners of her lips angle upwards. Kiro slowly learns how to curl the corners of his lips from her. It’s the first smile to appear on his face.

Suddenly, the door is flung open. A group of people wearing doctor’s coats enter and drag him away. The little girl watches him in a daze, and he stares back at her. They agreed to go out to have donuts - can they still eat them?

“I want to return to China.”

Pei En shakes his head, alarm in his eyes. “Why? There’s so much freedom here, and I’m the only one who monitors you. And I’m inclined to trust you more now. You won’t betray us.”

“No... I still want to go back.”

Not just for the little girl. The symbols left behind by his master seem to point to a certain location in China... Where exactly is it? And why did he leave the symbols with the FBI? Could it be the place he’s hiding at right now?

No matter what, he wants to solve this riddle.

“All right. I’ll handle it for you as soon as I can. I think you’d have to use a false identity this time.”

“As long as everything goes smoothly, it’s fine.”

“Don’t worry, there’s nothing they can’t do.”

He wants to wait till he returns to China before telling Lawrence about what happened. Lawrence will definitely be extremely frantic. After all, he’s been following Kiro ever since he debuted in France.

And Pei En will definitely be happy. He can finally take over Kiro and become the favourite member of the group, and obtain love from the fans.

Kiro is someone who doesn’t lack love. But he always subconsciously wishes that he could obtain even more love. More and more...

[ Chapter 6 ]

Before Kiro retuned, Pei En gave him materials pertaining to the agency in China.

“Your agent is called Savin. He doesn’t seem as eager for instant success and quick profits as Lawrence. Mr Savin is a very amiable person, and you should be very happy interacting with him.”

“Is he one of your people?”

“I don’t know.”

“You really don’t know?”

Pei En shakes his head. “I rank too low, so I don’t have the right to ask. I’m just an elementary spy.”

Kiro nods, taking his luggage and preparing to leave. He’ll set things straight eventually.

“Kiro, I don’t think you’re transparent. They say that what’s in your heart is easy to guess, which is why they put me by your side. But I think they have underestimated you.”

Kiro looks at Pei En’s troubled eyes, then showcases his signature sunny smile.

“How can that be? Do you want a postcard? When I get to China, I’ll mail you one. I also want to mail them to Lawrence and the members from the band. Treat it as an apology.”

Like Kiro, Pei En showcases a sunny smile. “In that case, we’ll wait for your news. You’ll definitely be at the height of popularity in China.”

“Let’s work hard together.”

“Yes!”

After parting with Pei En, who has been with together with him from morning to night for so long, Kiro lifts his luggage and embarks on an unknown journey.

As what Pei En said, he isn’t transparent. His brilliant smile conceals something underneath, just as the brilliant sun shrouds darkness underneath.

Hidden in the depths of his secrets are things even darkness doesn’t know of. If darkness had a mind of its own, it might think it doesn’t fit with this pure and simple youth.

Just as how everyone think he’s a simple, innocent Kiro, the sunlight casted on him can pierce through him completely, the rays of light refracting onto the floor.

Actually, since a very long time ago, he was no longer a youth...

But, for her sake, he's willing to become a youth again.

“Don’t be afraid, I’ll protect you.”

He once again recalls what the girl said to him.

“This time, I’ll be the one protecting you.” Kiro says excitedly. He stands outside the JFK Airport, his eyes staring directly at the sun.

“I’ll find you, and protect you. I even have a mountain of souvenirs stored in my luggage. I’ll give them all to you. And my purest heart - I’ll give it to you too!”

Other cancelled R&S: here

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc kiro #cncancelled #my emotions went on a field trip while translating this

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staticscreenwriting · 4 years

Text

California Summer - B.H. Smut [two]

Synopsis: Kings Cove California is Billy Hargrove’s hometown. It’s also a popular summer vacation destination for rich couples and their spoiled kids. (Y/N) is one of those rich girls. Proper, sweet, innocent. Only that all bores her to death and Billy is just the adventure she’s been looking for. It’s all fun and games. A summer fling. Not strings attached. Right?

Inspired by the song “Young & Dumb” by Cigarettes After Sex.

Part 1

A/N: There is smut in this, babes. Please if that is not for you, don’t read it. Also do not interact if you’re under 18, that’s just not cool. Kay, thanks ♥

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]

The air is hot and sweltering on Tuesday. A blue sky filled with thick grey clouds. There’s a sizzling in the air. A promise of rain. A promise of a storm.

Billy steps out of his car and onto the white gravel driveway of the (Y/L/N)’s holiday estate. It’s a grand house. These people are rich and they want you to know it. Nothing is subtle or modest. It wants to be seen, to be stared at, to be wanted. This house demands your attention. Thinking about it, Billy thinks it’s fitting that (Y/N) lives here. She too, demands people’s attention. Undivided.

He steps up to the door, his black polo shirt proudly displaying the “ Franklin and Company cleaning and maintenance service” logo in his right chest. Mr Franklin said company uniforms are a good way to increase the team spirit. Billy suspects it’s just another way for those rich assholes to further distance themselves from peasants like him.

The doorbell chimes up in some melodic little tune. Even the god damn doorbell is over the top. A deep disdain settles inside Billy’s bones, takes residence in his heart. He wonders if those people truly know what suffering means. He wonders if financial stability and a luxurious lifestyle can soften the blow of a heartache. Wonder if he’d still be this bitter, if his heart would still feel this heavy, if he was the one living in a house like this.

When the door swings open, Billy is greeted by Mr. (Y/L/N) and his smile that’s just too big. There’s a certain size a smile should have and his smile exceeds that size. It’s unsettling. With his bright white teeth and the moustache, he looks like some kind of cheesy 60s Batman villain.

“ Hi, Billy. Good to see you. So here’s the thing — “ he then starts to proceed a dramatic monologue about the broken filter system of their pool. Billy only half listens, his mind wandering through the halls of this mansion. He wonders if she’s home. Wonders what her room looks like. Wonders if she can still feel his lips on hers. Taste him. Feel him inside her.

As they walk through the main living room, Billy’s eyes fall onto a picture on the mantlepiece of their elaborate fireplace. (Y/N) smiles brightly back at him from the photograph, draped in a long white dress and long opera gloves. It almost looks like a wedding gown only she looks way too young in this picture and there’s no husband to be seen. She smiles so big, so radiant but there’s something in her eyes. The same riddle he’s tried to figure out that day he picked her up in the rain. A kind of sadness that is both so familiar, and so foreign to him.

“ Joan and I are gonna be out all day but if you need anything, my daughter (Y/N) should be around. She’s a nice girl, I’m sure she’ll be pleased to lend you a hand. “

Billy has to stop himself from choking on his own spit. If only this man knew what his girl gets up to when dad’s not looking.

“ Alright, that’s fine. “

“ Good. Good. Now if you’ll excuse me. “

“ Sure, yeah. Have a good day.”

Mr. (Y/L/N) walks back towards the entrance hall, this house has a goddamn entrance hall. A second later his wife steps up next to him, big floppy hat on her head, fancy-looking silk scarf around her neck. That one probably cost more than Billy pays in rent every month.

The way the interact makes him feel uneasy. There’s no affection there, no kindness. It all is very stoic and structured and empty. He wonders if rich people are all this hollow, if it comes with the territory. If maybe there are certain expectations put on you when you’re loaded and to fulfil those you have to lose part of yourself in the process.

“ Bunny, we’re off “ (Y/N)’s father yells up the stairs to be met with her voice calling down a disgruntled “okay” a few seconds later.

Bunny. They call her bunny. This day is getting better and better. With a smirk on his face, Billy grabs his tools and drags himself out towards the pool into the hot California sun.

The filter is fixed in a matter of minutes, then he cleans the pool, mows the lawn, scraps dirt out of the rain gutter. All while the hot sun is beating down on him, burning his skin and making him sweat. What he wouldn’t give for a bit of rain or a dip in the ocean.

Just as he’s packing up his tools, a loud banging sound from the inside catches Billy’s attention, followed by a string of curses. There’s no doubt in his mind it’s her. Her voice still fresh on his mind as she whispers dirty words into his ears while he dreams.

Rounding the corner, he catches sight of her, sitting on the bottom step of the stairs, rubbing her knee and contorting her face in a display of pain.

“ Are you okay? “

“ Yeah, just tried taking two steps at once and uh — didn’t go so well, “ (Y/N) replies as she gets up and dusts herself off.

Whenever Billy thinks of her, his mind always wanders back to that first night he caught sight of her. Her flowy skirt, the flower in her hair, the too big denim jacket. Something about her then looked almost ethereal. Like she didn’t belong with anyone around her. Like she didn’t belong to this place. To this earth.

Looking at her now, Billy almost can’t believe it’s the same person. She’s wearing cut off jeans shorts, socks with that frilly lace stuff stick out from her beat-up tennis shoes and the I ♥ New York shirt that’s draped over her body is at least two sizes too big and has no doubt seen a few years pass already.

“ Look at you, Mr. Polo shirt! “

“ Stop! “

“ It’s cute! “

“ It’s company policy.”

“ Aw no, does it limit your freedom for self-expression? “

“ Why are you taking the piss? I saw the picture on the fireplace. Cute wedding dress. Prom? “

(Y/N) does that thing that’s neither a scoff nor a laugh and yet both at once. She walks up to the fireplace and takes the frame in her hands. There it is again, the sadness in her eyes. Even though she’s smirking there’s a fundamental sadness so deeply engrained in her beautiful eyes that Billy almost regrets having mentioned the photo.

“ Not prom, goof. My cotillion”

“ Your what now? “

“ My debutante ball. It’s a formal presentation of young women to introduce them into society. “

“ Sounds like a cattle auction to me. “

This time she fully scoffs, no laughter or smirk anywhere in sight. “ You might have a point.”

“ So what they like, offered you or — “

It’s such a strange concept, Billy isn’t even able to wrap his head around it. A formal presentation of young women already sounds wrong. Just thinking about her being paraded around leaves a sour taste on his tongue.

“ Kinda yeah. I mean it’s nothing sexual or anything but uh — well. There’s a bunch of girls in matching dresses who all get introduced individually. They put a real emphasis on who your parents are so people are immediately aware your family is loaded. Then the dad’s guide the girls across the stage and hand them over to the escort. Usually, an equally rich male around the same age who’d be a wonderful addition to the family. Then there’s this specific curtsy every debutante has to perform …”

“ Are you fucking with me right now? “

“ Absolutely not. It’s a real big deal. They have a serious committee and everything.”

“ Well you look miserable in that picture. “

“ Oh I was. I didn’t wanna do it in the first place and then my dad also told me that I couldn’t have my boyfriend at the time be my escort because apparently he wasn't good enough or his family wasn't prestigious enough. I really liked that boy too. I was so sad. “

“ Why’d you do it then? “

“ Well all my friends did it and then dad also pulled the mom card so — “

As those words fall from her lips, her eye glass over a little, as if she just started dreaming or let her mind wander someplace else. Billy always felt like it was weird, the way he observes people, the way he notices things. But when you grow up in a house that’s so loud and so angry, you start to notice the quiet things. It’s a survival instinct. Noticing the little things can save your life.

“ The mom card?”

“ Yeah. Said my mom always wanted to see me as a debutante. Said I should do it to honor her memory. Even had her own cotillion dress shipped in from my grandparents place to use the fabric for mine. “

Dead mother. There it is. One little puzzle piece to slide into place. A step in the right direction in figuring out the riddle that’s her mind. Dead mother. It’s not a pain he knows but one he can imagine. His own mother was the best person he knew, an angel in his eyes. He loved her more than he ever loved another person. Then she left and ripped his heart straight from his chest. Maybe he doesn’t know what it’s like losing your mother to death but he does know what it feels like having a mother one day and then not having one the next and feeling so terribly alone in the world.

“ So Joan’s not — “

“ She’s my mother too. Mom died when I was 6, dad and Joan married when I was 10. She’s been in my life not longer than my mother was. I love her so much but I also miss my actual mom. “

He doesn’t know what make the words fall from his mouth so easily, as if they don’t weight a million tons on his heart. But something tells him that he can be honest with her. Maybe it’s a certain comfort that two people can only find in shared pain.

“ My mom fucked off when I was 9. Just up and left, to be with some guy she’d met at her job as a waitress. A fucking dentist of all people. Haven’t seen her since. “

“ Fuck, that sucks. “

“ Yeah it’s whatever.” Billy shrugs. It’s not whatever and they both know it but it’s one thing to tell her about his mother, it’s another to open up his entire chest and let her see all the cracks in his heart. That’s a vulnerability he’s not willing to show her.

“ Well this is turning into a gloom-fest, huh. Do you wanna get outta here and do something? “

He really does. The heaviness on his heart feels suffocating. Like someone is squeezing his chest, breaking ribs in the process.

“ Sure. What’s your plan?”

“ No plan. How about the beach? “

Billy smiles at her suggestion. “ Sounds good. “

“ Man, your car is clean. I didn’t even notice the first time. “ (Y/N) remarks as the drive along the sleepy town of Kings Cove. The windows are rolled down and a soft wind sweeps through them, making (Y/N) hair fly around her face. Her feet are kicked up on the dashboard and her red lips are pulled into a teasing smirk.

“ It’s my baby, I like it when she’s clean. “

“ She? “

“ Mmh.”

“ Does she have a name? “

“ No. You wanna make a suggestion?”

“ Hmmm how about — (Y/N) ?”

“ That’s your name. “

“ It’s a good name !”

“ Not naming my car after you.” Billy chuckles.

“ Okay. How about Lilly? “

Billy shrugs. Honestly, he has no interest in naming his car but if it makes her happy, he might as well entertain the thought. “Sure, fine with me.”

She’s quiet for a moment before she speaks up again. “ You wanna know what Lilly needs? “

“ No. “

“ Some decor. Some personality. Like some dice hanging from the mirror or — or a dashboard dancer. Like a hula girl. “

“ Absolutely not. “

(Y/N) gasps “ I know! A dancing Elvis. You know the ones! You need one of those. “

Billy has to wince at the thought of a cheap plastic figure vaguely resembling Elvis stuck to his front window so it can dance on the dashboard.

“ Or I could not do that. I like my car the way it is. Thank you very much. “

(Y/N) just smiles and maybe that’s enough for right now. There are more secrets hidden in the corner of her lips, in the glint of her eyes, in the way the sun falls on her face. But those can stay there for right now. All that matter in that moment is the cheesy Don Henley song playing from the stereo and the red of her fingernails tapping along to the beat and the way life feels weightless then.

“ This is so beautiful. “ (Y/N)’s words are hardly louder than a whisper. Her voice is overtaken by a peaceful sense of awe and admiration. Her bare feet are buried into the still warm sand as the sky around them shines in hues of pinks and oranges.

“ I can’t believe you get to see this every day of your life. You can just decide you want to watch the sunset over the ocean and do it. “

Billy shrugs as if it’s nothing when in reality he knows exactly how much this really means. Living in Hawkins, away from the ocean and his home and his heart, it made him realise how much he really loves this place. How his heart will forever be bound to the sea and the waves and the freedom it gives him.

“ I guess it’s pretty cool. “

“ You guess? Billy this is — this is spectacular. Sitting here and just taking it all in makes me feel fearless and invincible and brave. Like the world is so big and vast and there’s so much still for me to discover and experience and I can actually do it. “

“ What’s stopping you ? You got all the money in the world. “

He wonders if she can hear the spark of resentment that his voice carries. Billy doesn’t put it there on purpose, it’s just something so deeply edged into his genetics it’s hard to get rid off. Life’s hard for everyone, he knows that. The logical part of his brain does. But being financially stable surely helps soften the blow.

“ Not if you ask my parents. They’re just waiting for me to find a suitable husband whos family is at least as rich as mine if not richer. Then settle down in a nice big house, pop out a few kids — be miserable forever. “

He doesn’t know what to say to that. There’s a certain familiarity in her words. Billy knows exactly what it feels like being stuck in a situation that makes you miserable and to feel like you will never get out of it. Even though both their situations couldn’t be more different, there’s a shared sense of captivity.

“ I’m sorry, I’m being a huge whiny bitch about this. Poor rich girl with her rich girl problems. “

Though her words are meant to sound airy and light, they are all but that. There’s a heaviness to them. A sincerity.

“ Don’t be stupid. This is your future. Your life. You get to bitch about it. If not about that then what about? “

Billy succeeds in making her crack a smile. A small success in the grand scheme of things, but a success nonetheless.

“ What would you wanna do? If your parents had no say in it ? “

Her sight settles on the setting sun, her chest heaves with big breaths. As if she’s trying to catch the moment in her lungs and keep it there forever.

“ Last year I started studying photography in New York. My parents thought I was working an internship at a family friend’s firm. I wasn’t. When they found out they made me drop out and come back home. That’s why I wasn’t around last year. That’s what I wanna do. But my parents they are — my dad grew up during a time when art wasn’t a career that could really put food on the table. He’s a businessman, a hard worker. He sees numbers before anything else. And I don’t think he’s doing this to be mean or anything. It’s just what he knows. Dreams were not something he could chase and survive it. It was eat or dream. I think he wants to spare me that life. I just wish he would take the time to even as much as look at my pictures. They’re good. “

“ You should show me some. “

To be quite honest, it’s not about the pictures. Billy has never been a particularly artsy person nor does he care for photography. But this is important to her, this is where her heart is. No one has ever believe in him, he knows the empty feeling that comes with that realisation. If he can be the one person to show her that her dreams and her talent matter, then it’s worth it.

“ Yeah? “

“ Sure, why not? “

“ Alright, I will. Think I can mix in some naughty ones. “

Billy raises his eyebrow. “Oh really? “

“ Mmmh.”

Her lips don’t taste like slurpee this time. They taste like summer heat and salt and warmth. A little like cigarette smoke and mint chewing gum.

Her fingers tangle in his locks, tugging deliciously as her tongue curls around his. It’s softer than the kisses in his kitchen, not fueled by lust but by a shared comfort in each other.

“ What was that for? “ he asks as they pull away, far enough to talk to each other but close enough to breath in each other’s air.

“ For listening. And for — caring.”

Billy’s lips decent back on hers, then her cheek, her neck. Her skin feels soft and warm underneath him. He can feel her pulse quickening as he softly sucks at the delicate spot where her neck meets her shoulder.

“ You can’t leave hickeys!”

“ Why not? “ he murmures against her.

“ Got this thing at the country club in a few days. My dress doesn’t have a turtleneck. Dad’s gonna kill me if he sees it. “

Of course her family frequents the country club the town over, it’s so fitting. Billy’s been there a few times, tending to their greenery and fixing stuff. It brings good money and he got to eat their for free which was nice. But looking at all the rich people in their fancy clothes drinking champagne by the pool was — strange. Johnny works there as a waiter part time and always has the most ridiculous but funny stories to tell.

“ Aw, daddy’s little girl not allowed to kiss boys? “ Billy mocks, not making any attempt at moving his lips away from her neck until she nudges him off and pushes him down onto the warm sand.

“ Oh I do more than just kiss them. “ (Y/N)’s voice is laced with lust and passion and sultriness.

Soft warm kisses wander down his neck, as her hands leave trails up and down his stomach underneath his shirt. In a swift motion she pushes the fabric up, to pepper gentle kisses on his chest, his stomach, down to the edge of his pants.

Billy can feel the blood rushing through him, can feel the adrenaline flowing through his veins. A tingling sensation builds up. Is there anything better than a girl sucking you off with the sun setting over the ocean in the background? Not really, he’s fairly sure about that.

(Y/N) hands fumble with the zipper of his jeans before she pulls them down just enough for his dick to pop out.

The way she looks up at him, eyes filled with a mixture of mischief and innocence. The way she bites her lip in anticipation — it kills him. This is his day of reckoning. This is the end and god does he love it.

Billy is fully aware of what's happening as she swirls her tongue around the head of his dick but his mind is swimming, his heart is pounding. Maybe it’s her or maybe it’s the moment, he doesn’t know. All he does know is that sometimes life can be real fucking sweet. Especially when your cock’s soft and warm in a pretty girl’s mouth.

She hollows her cheeks, goes fast then slow, moves her hand along her lips in a perfect rhythm of pure lust. It’s wet and warm and tight and perfect.

An alternating pattern of kitten licks and deep strokes drive him crazy. She swallows around him like the goddamn patron saint of sucking cock, takes him so deep he’s fairly sure they should grant her some award for it.

When he feels the tidal wave of passion crash onto him and pull him under, drown him in ecstasy, he buries his fingers into her hair, pulls her closer, moves his hip faster — fucks her mouth. And she moans, every once in a while looking up at him with those eyes — those damn beautiful eyes. And there’s a smirk playing on her lips, around his dick, every once in a while. She enjoys this too and that’s what sends him over the edge.

Billy cums just as the sun sets behind the horizon, that one moment when the world is pure gold. He doesn’t see that though, doesn’t realise. All he sees is her eyes and her smile and the way she wipes her lips and all the riddles he wants to solve that live in her heart and all the things he wants to explore with her.

“ You’re welcome.” she says and giggle as she crawls back up to lay beside him, propped up on her elbows, eyes set on the horizon.

“ Uh-huh. “ Billy’s mind is still hazy, words can hardly form least of all make sense.

“ I can’t believe you get this view every day. “

He’s not sure whether she’s talking to him or to herself, maybe a little of both. What he’s sure of though, is that his view is much nice right now. Her, free and wild and — beautiful, sitting and watching as the world turns pink and orange and gold for one last time before nightfall.

It’s quiet for a moment as they catch their breath, as she takes it all in and Billy tries to shake off the fogginess in his brain. It’s quiet and peaceful and safe and comfortable.

And then she speaks up again.

“ You should come to the country club thing. “

And his heart sinks because — absolutely fucking not.

#billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove imagines #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fanfic #stranger things smut #stranger things imagine #stranger things imagines

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havethetimeofyourstyles · 4 years

Text

Chapter Five. Missed You

the scene is set in 1956, a young man moved to Hollywood to follow his dreams of becoming an actor. But with little money and a struggle to keep his apartment, he is approached by a man who offers him a job at Sweetland.

a/n: hopefully this will mend your hearts from the last chapter! this chapter is dedicated to my best friend ira @stylesloveclub who is quite literally my real life Frances, ily :’)

SERIES MASTERLIST | JOIN THE TAGLIST chapter word count: 9.2k

warnings: biphobia, y/n going tf off, and fluff

LETS TALK ABOUT CN! let me know your thoughts!

pls rb to share! <3

It’s been a while since you ever felt happy again.

You missed the way you would laugh with your friends freely, or the way you feel yourself blush, making the corners of your lips turn up into a smile. But ever since that day, something inside of you switched.

Ever since that day, you weren’t the same person anymore. You held so much pain and anger inside of your heart that there couldn’t have possibly been anyone to switch that back to your normal, besides one person of course.

But the pain and anger wasn’t just from that one day; it was the built up emotions you kept inside of you for years causing you to lash out, and that day was the last straw.

A week after that horrid day, you were able to get out of bed as you left your ruffled warm sheets and tear damped pillowcases. Frances and Alice had told the staff you weren’t feeling well that entire week, and luckily they understood and were able to find a replacement for your class.

You didn’t get out of your room until everyone in the house had left in the morning, which was about eight a.m, and you were locked away in your room before they were able to see you as they arrived home. You really didn’t want to see anyone; the presence of any other breathing soul was out of your favor during that week as you just wanted to wallow your way through the days.

You figured, after that week, that you needed to get back to work. It wasn’t like you to be so in your feelings and to practically stay in bed for an entire week, but the pain was so very different from anything else you’ve ever felt. You missed him dearly, that’s a given. And if you couldn’t be with him, then you were fine with just being friends. His presence around you is what you really wanted; you just needed him to be around, but you couldn’t get into contact with him--it was like he fell on the face of the earth.

On your first day back, you had a morning class as did Frances, so she wanted to pick you up and get coffee before you both headed to work. Alice had a class later that day, so it was just the two of you. But you enjoyed spending time with them individually.

“Hey, doll! Hop in,” Frances smiled, tapping the leather seat beside her, and you got into her lavender Chevrolet convertible.

“Thanks for picking me up,” you said softly, looking at her. She smiled, turning your head to look at you, and finding such a heartbroken woman who desperately needed some sleep from the heartache and exhaustion.

“Anything for you,” she said back, grabbing your hand as she drove.

Frances had picked you up an hour earlier than when classes began, wanting to just talk and listen to you, and if you didn’t want to do either, she just wanted to keep you company, wanting to be there for you.

The car was parked on the curb in front of the coffeehouse, which was around the corner from the studio. As you walked in, you were met with the aroma of fresh brewed coffee; the scent filled your senses as you felt as if you were in a cabin in front of the fire on a cold day. It was definitely not a cold day as you wore black shorts that stopped mid thigh and a cropped black t-shirt; Frances was wearing the same, but she wore white shorts and a baby purple cropped tee, and you loved how much she loved the color lavender.

“Go find us a table,” she said, insisting on paying for the coffee. The coffeehouse wasn’t that packed—a few people working as they wrote or read the newspaper.

You found a seat next to the window on the side of the shop, and waited for your hot drink as you watched the sun proceed to get brighter and brighter as the minutes went by, and you were too distracted to notice Frances sitting in front of you, drinking her coffee, and you assumed she might’ve been sitting in front of you for a while.

“Thank you for the coffee,” you said, picking the hot drink up and blowing on it for it to cool down.

“Of course.”

It was completely silent between you two as you both drank your coffees and enjoyed the comfortable silence. It was times like these where you appreciated Frances. Without a doubt you love your little group, but when the three of you are together, it can be very chaotic—fun but chaotic to the point where you’re a bit overwhelmed. But with Frances, you were able to be comfortable in just sitting across from one another without saying a word. She knew how to have fun agreeably, but she knew how to be that friend that let you take your time or to simply just keep you company when you’re feeling lonely.

After a while, you looked at her, and she was already looking at you, but her eyes perked up and she had a bright smile on her face.

“Thank you again, doll-”

“You need to stop thanking me,” she giggled, causing the corners of your mouth to turn up slightly.

“I mean it though. I can’t thank you enough for what you’ve done—Alice too. You always call me to see if I’m fine, and you picked me up, like that’s so sweet of you,” you said, tears welling up in your eyes. She reached her hand across the table to hold yours.

“Of course, I’m gonna be here for you. We’re best friends—have been for years now. And you’ve been through a lot. It’s time we hold some of the weight for you,” she said with a small nod. Her words caused the tears in your eyes to fall, like they triggered them to flow as they pleased because you’ve been wanting to hear those words for a long while now.

“You’re the best. I’m so thankful for you,” you said as you tried to contain your sobs. Frances got up from her seat and walked over to your side as you scored to the seat next to you so she could sit on the seat you were in prior.

She hugged you into her chest as you quietly sobbed into her neck while she soothed your back to comfort you. To outsiders, they were probably thinking how early it is for a breakdown, and you agreed, it was too early. However, you were in a bubble with your greatest friend as she was combing through your hair, comforting you through your greatest pain, and the outside world meant nothing at the moment.

It was 10 minutes before class started when you and Frances entered the studio the week after locking yourself up; Susan greeted you with a big smile as Frances said she’ll see you after class and walked down the opposite hallway.

“Welcome back, lady,” she had said with bright eyes. You softly smiled at her, immediately regretted agreeing to any social interaction--not that Susan wasn’t the sweetest person you’ve met, but you were still broken and sad.

“Hi, Susan,” you said to her as a pained smile on your face as you walked by her desk. But before you walked any further down the hall to your class, you backed up slightly to stand next to the reception desk. Her brows raised, waiting for you to speak. “Uh, did I happen to get any calls while I was away? Did someone call for me?” You asked warily, not knowing what answer you wanted to hear.

“Nope. No calls were made for you. It was a pretty slow week,” she replied back, her usual smile on her face. Your heart sank a little, hoping a certain someone would have called you.

“Tell me about it,” you had muttered under your breath. “Thank you though,” you spoke directly to her before you walked away.

And it was like that for the longest time; you asking Susan if you had gotten any calls after each class and her saying no. You figured she had caught on a bit from your constant asking, but it was a bit upsetting to hear that no every single time. You just wanted a single call from him; to ask him if he was okay, where he’s been, and to simply just hear his voice.

The voice that had brought you immediate comfort and ease from your crazy and busy life. The sound that was music to your ears when he laughed or talked to you in his deep sultry voice. And you just wanted him to tell you that he was okay. You could practically hear his voice in your head as if it were the only sound you memorized. The way he said ‘sweet girl’ was like the line in a song that you would repeat over and over again because it just gave you ultimate chills.

You heard so crisp and so clearly; he would say ‘sweet girl, I’m doing okay. Don’t worry about me.’ But you couldn’t help but worry about him.

You missed your honey dearly.

And you continued missing him.

Up until now, you hadn’t stopped thinking about him. Six months later, there was just something about him that never left your mind and especially your heart. The hole in your chest was enough to explain to yourself how you felt, and it wasn’t normal to feel this way.

“Hey! I know you’re in your feelings at the moment, but would you please sing along with us?” Alice asked from the seat next to you as you heard Frances mutter a ‘please’ from the backseat.

You three were on your way to San Diego for a little trip girls trip. Although it was January and the weather would most likely be cold, you three were still on break as the studio hadn’t resumed classes just yet because of the holiday. But they would be back on next week, so you three wanted to have a mini getaway for a little bit before you have to go back to reality.

“Okay, okay,” you playfully rolled your eyes at them as they saw your little gesture through your sunglasses.

The three of you sang along to Elvis as you drove to San Diego. It was still quite sunny despite the month being January, but the air was crisp and cool. Cold enough so you could wear a sweater and some pants since California cold is cold to Californians.

The drive was about a four hour drive from Beverly Hills, and you three stayed at a hotel walking distance from La Jolla beach. The trip was only three days because what’s really there to do besides go to the beach everyday, especially when it was cold out.

“Okay, dolls, are we ready to go?” Alice asked you and Frances as you all settled into the hotel. You two nodded excitedly, grabbing your towels and blankets before heading out of the hotel and to the beach.

You all figured out that the water was way too cold for a swim, but the sun was bright still as you three sat on your towels, all facing each other. You had bought some fruit for a little market that was on the way to the beach.

“Think we picked a good spot--so many cute people around,” Frances said. You looked around to observe some of the men and women that were relaxing on the sand or in their swimsuits. You nodded in agreement as you took a bite out of your watermelon slice.

“Ooh! I think that lady is looking at you doll,” Alice said excitedly. You looked at her and she pointed her head to the direction of the woman, and you turned your head slowly to find a beautiful woman in her swimsuit, smiling and waving at you. Politely, you smiled back at her.

“Are you going to go talk to her?” Frances asked, and you shrugged.

You knew that they were just trying to help the heartache in your chest that has been mending for the last six months. But if you still felt the same amount of pain as you did six months ago, you weren’t quite ready to move on yet.

“Think you need that, doll. How are you gonna move on if the only people you really socialize with are us two?” Alice said, and she had a point. It was difficult to move past everything because you’ve locked yourself away and only limited yourself to some social interaction with people you already know. “It’ll be a nice change. And if you don’t want to talk to her, then come back here and you could talk to us! At least you tried,” Alice reassured you, and Frances nodded alongside her.

You smiled softly at the both of them, and slowly nodded. You at least wanted to try, and being somewhere that’s four hours away from your home was a nice start. Handing your fruit to Frances, not wanting your fruit to get a sand flavor, and you got up. Your girls cheered you on, yelling out ‘that’s the spirit!’ and ‘so proud of you, doll’ as you slowly walked over to the woman who was sitting in her beach chair.

“Hi,” you nervously said to the woman.

“Hey, cutie. Was just looking at you,” she complimented with a smirk, looking up at you.

“Uh, yeah. My friends told me,” you said, turning around to point to them. But you also turned around just to see their reassuring smiles because you were actually quite nervous. And when you saw them beaming, giving you a thumbs up, you turned back around.

“Well, would you like to sit?” She offered, and you said a soft ‘okay’ before sitting down on the towel in front of her, practically at her feet. “I’m Catherine, by the way,” she said, sticking her hand out. She looked a bit older than you--probably in her late twenties. She had beautiful blonde hair that was put in a high ponytail as she wore a cream colored two piece swimsuit.

“Nice to meet you,” you said, shaking her hand as you told her your name.

“Such a beautiful name for you,” she winked at you, flirting with you slightly.

For the next thirty minutes, you and Catherine got to know one another, and you thought she was nice; she was very friendly, often stealing some innocent touches to your shoulder or your arm as she laughed about god knows what you said.

Suddenly, someone walked under the umbrella and Catherine handed the other woman a towel before she sat down on the beach chair next to Catherine’s. They smiled at each other, and you looked between them; a silence fell through you as they talked.

“The water felt great,” the woman said, and Catherine smiled, roaming her hand on the woman’s arm as she did to you.

“Oh, by the way. This is Milly, my girlfriend,” Catherine introduced. Your eyes widened, feeling shocked as she didn’t mention that she had a girlfriend when she was flirting with you and touching your arm.

“Hi, uhm, I should get back to my friends then,” you stood up from your crouch position, dusting your bottom off from the sand that had gotten on the towel.

“Wait, we actually want you to stay,” Milly said before you had a chance to walk away. “Catherine and I are together, but we were curious about exploring with another partner, and we both saw you sit with your friends, and thought you were absolutely gorgeous,” she explained.

You blushed, a bit flustered from what she said. You’ve never explored with two partners before, and you were curious as to how that’ll go down. But in total honesty, you weren’t feeling it.

“That’s nice of you, thank you for choosing me, I guess?” You chuckled, cursing at yourself for how dumb that sounded. “But to be honest, I’m a bit heartbroken at the moment, so I’m not in the mood,” you said honestly.

“Oh no, how could some girl break your heart?” Catherine said, assuming that it was a girl that got you sad.

“I-It wasn’t a girl, actually. It was a guy,” you corrected. Catherine and Milly looked at each other confusingly, and soon after Milly scoffed.

“Wait, so you don’t like girls?” Milly asked, needing some sort of confirmation.

“I do! I like men and women. I’m bisexual,” you said, crossing your arms in defense, feeling like this was all going to end badly.

“You like both...” Catherine said shockingly and you nodded as you took deep breaths. You tried keeping yourself together, not wanting to make a scene at the beach as everyone was minding their own business, as you looked at them with a stern look.

“So you just couldn’t choose,” Milly said. You gave her a scowl look, furrowing your brows as the two laughed slightly.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” you said, rolling your eyes. You turned around, not wanting to be around the presence of people who put you down for your sexuality. So, you walked through the sand back to your friends as they were about fifteen feet away from the two. As you walked you heard them call out to you.

“We know being gay isn’t appreciated here, but you being greedy and liking both? Are you okay, sweetie?” They called out, followed by laughter.

Alice and Frances looked at each other confusingly, wondering what the hell happened back there before you grabbed your fruit bowl from Frances hands and marched back over to them, squishing the watermelon cubes with your hands so the juices of the fruit spilled out, and the fruit itself turned into mush. They didn’t see you coming as they were still laughing and making jokes about your sexuality.

And before you knew what you were doing, you dumped the entire bowl onto Catherine’s head, watching the fruit spill down her hair and onto her body as she gasped loudly. Milly gasped as well, shocked that you did such a thing.

“Next time you want to make fun of someone’s sexuality, think again. Don’t fuck with us, I mean it,” you warned as your voice was tough and strong; the complete opposite as what it was when you were talking to her. You walked away to your friends as you saw both of their jaws dropped with an amused look as they were still confused but totally backed you up on what you did, even if they haven’t gotten a clue why you did what you did.

Once you got back to them, you picked up your purse and said, “Let’s go.” The both of them nodded, excited to hear what just happened as you all gathered your stuff as you heard curse from Catherine and Milly calling you a greedy and spoiled bitch. As you walked, you turned around, blowing them a kiss for shits and giggles.

“Oh my god! What the fuck just happened?!” Frances asked as she laughed.

You three stopped in front of the hotel as they both followed your lead, sitting on the curb, both on your sides. As you took deep breaths, you had so much adrenaline from the events that had just happened, but not even a minute later, you started laughing hysterically, which Alice and Frances found amusing so they joined you.

“Oh god…” you said once you calmed down. “That was such a rush--I’ve never done that before,” you told them, chuckling.

“Well, you never do things without reason, so it must’ve been a great reason,” Alice said, leaning her elbows on her knees.

You then proceeded to tell them what happened from the moment you walked over to Catherine to the moment you felt so uncomfortable as they practically bullied you because of your sexuality.

“Yeah, she deserved that shit,” Frances said from next to you.

“Definitely. Can people just get over themselves and mind their own damn business?” Alice scoffed, rolling her eyes as she scoffed, saying that she would have done a lot more than throwing fruit on her if she were you.

“I’m so over people saying shit,” you said tiredly, wanting people to accept you as who you are, but in this day and age, it’s difficult to.

“Don’t worry about them, doll. You’ve got us,” Frances said, giving you a hug and Alice joins in as well, and you tell them that you love them. You put your arms around your two best friends, thinking that this is the most fun you’ve had in a very long time. And even though it caused a scene where you had to ruin someone’s hair and their swimsuit as they said nasty things to you, you had your dolls by your side, reminding yourself that no matter where you are in life mentally and physically, you’ll always have them.

And you appreciated that so much.

After an eventful day to start the trip, you decided you needed a drink. So, you three found yourself at a bar in Downtown as you chatted among them in a booth as you ate peanuts and drank one too many ‘gin and sins’ that made you buzzed and fuzzed.

But that didn’t stop you from ordering more for the three of you nor did that stop you from accepting cocktails from Alice because she kept ordering as well. And the only responsible one between the three of you was Frances, which isn’t old news. Sometimes she liked to get down and dirty, but she didn’t like to have too much alcohol in her system, which you totally respect.

But ‘gin and sins’ were your favorite, and when you said you needed a drink, you needed a drink.

“Alright, think that’s enough for the both of you,” Frances said, limiting you and Alice.

“Noo,” you whined. “One more? Please?” You reach across the table, making grabby hands at Frances. Alice nodded next to you. She was more tipsy than drunk, and you on the other hand, were drunk.

“You said that in the last four rounds! I’m cutting you off,” Frances said sternly, and your eyes widened.

“Damn, okay,” you said, slowly sitting up.

“We should go,” Alice suggested.

“No, you know what we should do? We should dance!” You suggested an even better choice, getting up from your seat as you danced in front of your table, Frances and Alice got out of the booth as well. You were shaking and swiveling your hips in a sexy manner, or you’re trying to be, and you’re not aware of the people coming into the bar and the people sitting peacefully in their seats as some watched you with an amusing smile or a confused expression. But you didn’t give a fuck as you kept dancing.

“Alright, dancing queen. Let’s go back to the hotel,” Alice said as you huffed and stopped dancing while you pouted.

As you three were walking out, Alice and Frances on both of your sides, helping you walk, five people came in all at once, causing you all to move to the side and wait for them to clear the door. You watched them walk in, and suddenly your eyes widened and you were complete shock.

Alice and Frances slightly rugged at you since you weren’t walking at all, but you told them to wait.

“What’s wrong?” Frances asked, and you let both of your arms go from their hold. They followed your line of vision and looked at each other in confusion.

“Doll?” Alice called out to you.

“Harry…”

“C’mon-” Frances said as she tried to interlace your arm with hers, but you interrupted her.

“No!” You took your arm away from her. “Harry is right there,” you pointed towards the bar, and their head turned. Tears were welling up in your eyes as you felt so overwhelmed from seeing him again for the first time in six months.

Before you knew what your drunk self was doing, you started walking towards the bar, and your friends quickly followed behind as they tried to reach for your arms, but you pulled them away before they could even grasp it. Once you got to the bar, you leaned your left arm against it as you faced him.

“Harry,” you simply said. The man turned towards you, looking at you confusingly, but you were still convinced that it was Harry right in front of you. “Listen…” you said, trailing your words off as you weren’t prepared whatsoever to have him in front of you.

After a whole six months of figuring what you would say to him if you were to meet him again; going through the words in your head and falling asleep to the thought of talking to him again, you stood there with your mouth slightly open but no words fell through your lips. A sad expression was present on your face as your mending heart was pounding through your chest, begging him to heal you fully.

He looked at you, wondering if you were going to say anything and possibly wondering why a random girl would go up to him and call him Harry. And it’s the fact that he wasn’t saying anything either is what hurt you too. But you decided to speak up because if you didn’t now, then you would regret it later.

“Harry…I missed you,” you said, voice slightly cracking just as your heart was as well. “Six months without you was hell, and I never want to go through that again. But if you don’t want to see me anymore, then that’s fine,” you told him, voice coming out in a sad tone as you didn’t want to go through your days without having him in your life.

“Doll, we should go,” Frances said as she and Alice lightly grabbed your arm and tugged you backwards. “I’m sorry,” you heard her tell him.

“Wait,” you said, and you reached up to the man and kissed his cheek softly. You didn’t care if it was Harry or not, but you’ve had pent up emotions for so long that you just needed to let them out. And even if it was Harry, you weren’t going to leave him without kissing him, although you’d rather it be his lips than his cheek as you longed to feel his lips against yours again.

You despised that your last kiss with him happened under those events that night. That it led to something so heartbreaking and painful that you didn’t know when you would feel his touch again. You didn’t get the chance to anticipate the next time you’d be in his arms again. That the last time you heard the words ‘sweet girl’ from his mouth was when he was trying to comfort you from the pain you were both about to endure. And it’s like a broken record in your head, playing over and over again, and you don’t want to fix the broken record because then your favorite sound would disappear into the midst of nothingness.

Alice and Frances pulled you away from him as they guided you towards the exit and back to the hotel. Not surprising, but you cried the entire way to the room until your friends put you under the covers and wiped your makeup off as you told them how much you missed Harry and you just wanted to talk to him; that seeing him at the bar, even if it wasn’t him, had made the sadness in your chest come back because of how much you missed him.

They simply didn’t know what to tell you but feel sad for you knowing how much pain you were in. They hated seeing you so upset to the point where you didn’t act like yourself anymore. But they will always remain by your side as they kept telling you that you were going to be okay.

You woke up in a small state of panic as you weren’t aware of your surroundings and the feeling of the bed not being your own. With a slight headache and the taste of the alcohol on your tongue the night prior, there were continuous knocks on the door that made you roll your eyes and groan as it interrupted your state of deep slumber.

Lazily, you got up and looked at the bed next to you to find it empty as Alice and Frances didn’t seem like they were in the room either. You assumed they probably went out to get some food and bring it back as they talked about, and you also assumed that they had forgotten the room key, which is why they were banging on the door at ten in the morning.

“Okay, I’m coming, jeez!” You yelled out as you rubbed your eyes and lightly yawned, walking towards the door. You unlocked the door, opening it as you looked down because of the light and said, “Why must you knock on the door so loud?” Once your eyes adjusted from the brightness of the outside, it widened as the figure in front of you was not who you were expecting.

You blinked a couple of times, not sure if you were dreaming or drunk as your jaw dropped, not expecting to see Harry in front of you.

“Hi,” he simply said. It was a simple greeting and you wished he said a full on sentence just so you could hear his voice again, but something in you freaked out, causing you to slam the door in his face.

“Oh my god…” you said to yourself as you paced the carpeted hotel room. You tugged on your hair, taking deep breaths as you muttered to yourself about how he can’t really be outside of your room right now and you were just hallucinating that he was here. But when you heard the knock again, you were taken back to reality as you jolted your head towards the door and realized that you completely shut the door in his face. “Fuck,” you muttered as you quickly walked towards the door, opening it once again and meeting his eyes.

Harry gave you a small smile as he took in your presence again. It was a long six months of missing you and wishing you were in his arms again. He longed to see your pretty face and beautiful smile again, and being in front of you felt a bit overwhelming for him that his heart pounded and his eyes glossed. He truly couldn’t believe he was standing in front of you, and even in your wakened state, he still found you the most beautiful person ever.

“Harry,” you said as if you were calling out to him, believing but not believing he was in your vision.

“Uh, hi,” he said again hesitantly. He was definitely nervous, and you were too.

“W-What…what are you doing here?” You asked, crossing your arms and subtly trying to fix your messy bed hair. But he looked great as usual; he wore a red and yellow striped t-shirt with some grey trousers, and pale yellow loafers. Harry was the type of person who could make anything look good, and you were absolutely jealous of him for that. He didn’t look all that different from when you last saw him; his hair was still the same, but he had a slight stubble on his jaw.

“I came here to see you.”

“How did you know I was here?” You leaned against the door, still debating in your head if you should invite him in or not.

“Frances and Alice. They told me to come to your room last night,” he said, chuckling slightly.

“Last night…” you said, not thinking anything of it. “Oh, last night!” You repeated, realizing that last night was the night you apparently saw him, and it seemed like you did. “Oh my god,” you said as you buried your face into your hands, groaning in embarrassment. “That really was you, huh?” You asked, not taking your hands away from your face, but separating your fingers as your eyes peeked out.

“Yeah, it was me at the bar,” he said, giggling as he remembered the events that happened last night.

“See, I knew it was you! I had the smallest doubt that it wasn’t but convinced myself that it was,” you shook your head, chuckling. “Wait, that means you heard everything, and I really kissed you,” you said as you gasped softly. Harry blushed in response as he smiled lightly at you. “How did you know I was there?”

“I didn’t. I was there with some friends and I didn’t see you until you came up to me. Was completely surprised to be honest. And then Alice came up to me, after Frances dragged you away, to tell me to come up to your room today. So here I am,” he explained, which makes much more sense on why they disappeared in the morning and why Harry’s standing at your door.

“Here you are,” you said softly. It briefly went silent between you two; so many unspoken words between you as you two wanted to blurt so many things out, but you really wanted to sit down and have a real and mature conversation with him. “So, uh, do you want to hang out today? Figured we have a lot to talk about.”

“I’d love to. I’m free the whole day, so we can do anything,” he said, and you nodded.

“Do you want to go down to the beach? I can just get ready quickly and we can hang out over there?” You asked nervously, even though he already said yes to hanging out with you.

“Yeah, okay. That sounds great. I’ll, uh, wait for you out here?” He said, backing up slightly from the door frame so he’s completely standing outside.

“Okay, cool,” you said, immediately slapping yourself mentally once those words came out of your mouth. Harry seemed to find that amusing as he laughed a bit as he saw you beating yourself up over what you had said.

“Cool,” he said back, in a way to make you feel better about saying it, and your face had gone flustered as you slowly closed the door.

“I’ll be quick.”

“I’ll be right here.”

You nodded your head as you closed the door, closing your eyes as you took the deepest breath that you were holding ever since you saw him.

“Really? Cool?” You said to yourself, rolling your eyes as you groaned before you quickly got ready.

You were ready in 15 minutes as you wore a plain white knitted sweater and some leggings, considering it was a bit breezy outside, and you and Harry walked to the beach. Luckily, the beach was only about a five minute walk, and the walk was filled with silence as nothing came out of both of your mouths.

It was a nice day out considering the month still being winter, as the sun was out and slightly shining with the clouds present. You and Harry found a spot on the beach where there weren't that many people around to interrupt you both from your conversation.

Laying the towel down, Harry helped you as he held the other end to straighten it out, and you two sat next to each other. There was a bit of space between you two, and it definitely felt weird that you didn’t close the gap to sit closer to him, but in all honesty, you didn’t know if that was crossing the line. Plus, you didn’t know where you two stood either.

Your heart was pounding as you kept your hands in your lap from showing him how shakily nervous you were to be finally sitting next to him. And Harry was no better; he wasn’t saying anything because of the fact that he was also anxious as well. He was nervous that he would say the wrong thing to you, and he didn’t know if you were angry with him for disappearing for a whole six months.

After ten minutes of looking out into the ocean as the sun lightly hit your skins, you finally spoke.

“So…” you started, not finishing nor knowing what to say. Harry turned towards you, thankful that you were the one to start talking. “How are you, Harry?” You asked, and he somewhat cringed at the sound of his name as he missed the way ‘honey’ fell through your sweet lips.

“I’m, uh, I’m doing okay. How are you?” He answered, and you just shrugged your shoulders as you sighed. “Are you doing okay?”

“Y’know, I thought I was—doing okay. I mean, I was better than I was six months ago, but seeing you…” you said, looking him in the eye as memories of him leaving and running off came back to you. But you knew it wasn’t his fault; he did what he had and was told to do. “It just reminded me how much I missed you so much. And how much the last six months for me were hell because you weren’t around and I didn’t have contact with you,” you purse your lips, and Harry frowned, feeling guilty for not even calling you back.

“I’m sorry-”

“No, no. Don’t be. I understand,” you interrupted, but he shook his head in disagreement.

“Listen, not calling you was entirely my fault—I could’ve just…” he trailed off, not knowing how to word his thought properly.

“Harry, what happened during those months? I called and called, I stayed in front of your apartment complex and waited for you for hours, but you never showed up,” you said, not meaning to make him feel bad, but you were telling the truth. Harry frowned even more, looking down onto his lap.

Taking a deep breath, he looked up at you again as he spoke, “Okay. I’m going to tell you everything, just listen to what I have to say first before you decide if you want to be angry with me, alright?”

You nodded, not saying anything as you waited to hear what he had to say. But you knew you weren’t going to get angry with him, you simply just wanted to hear what the hell happened to him and why he went M.I.A for six months.

“After that night,” he started, not explaining any further of what that night was because you already knew, and it was hard to look and talk about what happened that day. “A few days later, I got a call from Shareen. She told me to come to the studio for a chat, and I thought it was going to be about the role. That maybe your father had a change of heart and decided to cast me, but I was wrong.”

Your brows furrowed, already furious that Harry going missing could have possibly involved Richard and you despised him even more for that, but you continued listening.

“I went to Shareen’s office, but she directed me to your father’s, and he said he wanted to talk to me. Was practically nervous at this point.”

“Harry, what did he say?” You asked as you grew impatient.

“Told me that if I stayed away from you, then he wouldn’t ruin the career that hadn’t even started. He said that he’s not going to cast me for the movie I auditioned for, but maybe the next one,” Harry said sadly, remembering how down he felt when he left his office and the studio. He was so close to having the career he wanted; so close to having his dream come true, but they were crushed right in front of him in the matter of seconds.

“What the actual fuck…” you said in a calm manner as you were trying not to lash out in public and in front of Harry.

“Hey, I’m so sorry. That’s the reason why I didn’t call because he told me to stay away, and it was hard to and I should’ve gone against his wishes, but it’s my career, y’know? I couldn’t risk not having my dream come true, and I hope you understand why I didn’t come to see you anymore. But know that it was a difficult decision to make because I was close to risking everything for you until Daren slapped some sense into me,” he explained quickly, not wanting you to be mad at him, but he would be if he were you.

“No, no. I’m not mad at you,” you said as your hand touched his face, cupping his cheek. Harry immediately got chills from the contact, and he missed your touch dearly. “I understand why you did what you had to do. You made a sacrifice for yourself, so I would never be mad at you for that. If you were to give up everything for me, then I would be mad,” you said softly, looking at the man that has had your heart for the last months.

“So, you’re not mad?” He asked, needing reassurance.

“No, of course not, honey. I’m glad you had to do what was best for you,” you told him honestly. “Yeah, it hurt not being able to talk to you or see you, and practically not know where you were, but look at us now. We’re right in front of each other and that’s all that matters.”

It was really all that mattered to you. You were never one to hold onto your anger and you were very forgiving in the sense, but being mad or upset at Harry didn’t exist because he did everything with good reason.

Harry blushed at the sound of his pet name coming from your lips. Missing that name was an understatement; he longed to hear it again, and throughout those months, he had no idea when he would hear it, but now it was the sound of relief and reunion.

“I’ve missed you calling me that,” he said, face being flustered. You moved to lay on your stomach, and he copied your actions as you two lay, facing each other.

The sun was getting a bit brighter, so Harry pulled out his sunglasses, putting them on and you gave him a smile. You were already wearing white heart sunglasses, but you took your pair off and reached forward to take his sunglasses off, and put them on you. They were a pair of red lensed sunglasses that were heart shaped as well, and you adored them. Harry chuckled as you put your sunglasses on him.

“These are like the glasses I would wear. Did you take them from me?” You teased, and Harry giggled, adjusting your white heart sunglasses on his face.

“I bought them because they reminded me of you,” he said honestly, and you blushed, smiling at him softly. Your heart instantly swooned once he said those words, and all you wanted to do was kiss him. “They look better on you anyways,” he complimented.

“Those look really good on you too,” you said back. You missed the back and forth, complimenting or banter with him. It was fun and light, and made you want more with him. It was something you thought about daily when you were away from him, and having it back made you feel so overwhelmed with happiness and joy.

“So, what’s been going on with you?” He asked after the glances that you two made each other made him flustered.

“Guess it’s my turn to tell my part, huh?” You chuckled,

“Only if you want to. I’m here to listen if you’d like,” he said. You smiled, happy he never changed his mannerism. He’s always been a gentleman to you and everyone, and that’s one of the things you loved about him.

“I wanna tell you,” you stated, and Harry nodded, waiting for you patiently to speak. “I wasn’t really doing okay, to be honest. I was a mess, and I haven’t really been myself since that day. Watching you leave was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, and not knowing when I would see you again comes right next to it. After about two months, I finally talked to my father. That ended messy because he had all these plans for me with my ex, Chris, about business and marriage and I never wanted them. Then it got to the point where I was crying in front of him because you weren’t in my life anymore. And I’ve never cried in front of him before, so it was quite the surprise for him,” you ended with a chuckle, and Harry nodded his head throughout you speaking, listening to you intently and taking your words in.

“Did things get better?” Harry asked, curiously, wondering if her father changed his attitude.

“No. He said some shit about if I can’t tolerate him or proceed with his plans, then I should move out. So, I did just that.” Harry’s eyes widened, shocked but relieved because you were somewhat free.

“You did?”

“Yeah, I’ve been living with Frances for about four months now, but I might move out soon just to get out of her hair, so we can have her own space. But I’m better now than I was for my entire 23 years of life when I was in that house,” you said in almost a relief. You’ve practically been miserable in that household; filled with toxicity and loveless people.

Jane had been sad to see you go, but she still encouraged you. She was the hardest one to say goodbye to, but she understood why you wanted to leave. There had been many tears as she watched you pack your suitcase into your car, and she sent you off with telling you to find the boy that “captured your heart.”

“I’m proud of you for doing that. I know you didn’t tell me much about your family and how you grew up, but from what it seemed like, you weren’t happy there. So I’m glad you have your freedom now,” he said honestly with a smile, not wanting you to seem offended. And you weren’t because he was completely right.

For a moment, you two shared glances and basked in the sun as you both laid under it. There was no action of moving closer than how you were now, but the thought of doing so made you both nervous.

“Are you still working at Sweetland?” You asked suddenly but curiously, breaking the silence between you two as the outside world of the ocean and birds filled the words.

“No, I’m not, actually. I quit about two months ago, but I still visit every week because I’ve grown quite attached to everyone there,” he said with a breathy laugh.

“Why did you quit, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“I kind of wanted a different job, and I wanted to do something I was good at. Not sure if sex is the answer to that,” he smirked, and your eyes widened.

“Oh, you’re definitely good at sex-” you paused as your cheeks had gone flustered because of what you said. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that out loud, and that was definitely crossing-”

Harry interrupted your rambling by stroking your cheek with his thumb. The action had caught you by surprise, but it definitely shut your mouth up. His stare was so passionate and intense that you felt like you were being put under his spell. His spell of comfort and familiarity. The spell of love. But you had been under that spell since you met him, and there was no way he was going to reverse it.

The thought of wanting to kiss him had never left your mind; you just wanted to pull him in for a kiss to relieve your need as the touch of his lips make you feel alive every time he kissed you.

“I’ve missed you,” he said in a hushed voice for only you to hear. Despite the crowd being relatively loud as the time goes by and more people visit the beach, you felt like you were the only two to ever exist at the moment. There was no one around to pop the bubble you two created.

“I’ve missed you so much more,” you whispered back, looking up and down from his lips and eyes.

He was doing the same, although his gaze held a little longer onto your lips as he noticed your lips being like strawberry lipstick from the many lollipops you’ve probably eaten. But nonetheless, his favorite lips are yours.

“I’m sorry for being so M.I.A,” he said once more.

“Stop being sorry. You’re here now,” you grabbed his hand that was resting against the towel as your face cuddled more into his hand.

“I was actually out of state. That’s why I wasn’t around.” Your brows raised, and he continued, “Went to go visit my mum in New York.”

“Really?” He nodded.

“Yeah. Hadn’t seen her in about a year, so I decided to save up a ton and go see her. Then I stayed for about two months, which was when I quit my job. I actually got back last week, and some guys at the shop wanted to make a trip down here, and then I saw you.”

“Yeah…” you said softly.

“When I saw you last night at the bar, I really couldn’t believe it. And then when you came up to me, my heart was beating so fast, but time stopped. You were talking to me all drunk, debating with yourself if it was really me or not, and then you fuckin’ kissed me, and I felt over the moon but I was still in shock,” he chuckled remembering how he felt the night prior.

“Knew in my heart that it was you, so I couldn’t resist myself from going up to you,” you told him honestly. Harry blushed, always loving your words and how honest you were.

He moved his position back to a sitting upright as his legs were bent and his arms resting on his knees. He motioned you to sit between his legs and you happily obliged, immediately moving to sit in between them as your back rested on his chest. This was the closest you’ve ever been with him in six months, and you were taking it all in as he wrapped his arms around shoulders, and you placed your arms on top of his.

The feeling of his body so close to yours had made you feel nostalgic. The moments where you two would lie in bed after sex or when he would put his arm around you as you walked the streets; those were the moments you missed the most because you felt so connected to him physically and emotionally. You longed for his warmth when you would go home to an empty bed and a bad day. You craved for his touch when you would lie awake at night as you stared at the ceiling, wondering what he was doing.

But this moment was worth all the pain and heartache that you had to go through the past months. It was the only thing you were looking forward to when you were to be reunited with him again, and you almost forgot the feeling of his arms around you when you were stuck in your own world as you missed the security of his warmth.

And you were happy.

After another hour or two of relaxing on the beach in each other’s arms, you two decided to call it a day. You held Harry’s hand all the way back to your hotel room, and the separation was something you weren’t looking forward to.

“Alright, I’ll see you soon, okay?” He said as he pulled you into a hug. Your head rested on his chest, hearing his beating heart pound through his chest as you wrapped your arms tightly around him—maybe too tightly. “Woah, woah. Might break me if you hug me any tighter,” he said jokingly. You embarrassingly loosened your arms, but you were still pressed up against him. You looked up at him, chin against his chest instead of the side of your face.

You gave him a small smile, but there was a hint of sadness, he could tell. And he knew exactly why there was a tinge of sadness.

“Hey, sweet girl,” he said softly, and your heart immediately started beating quite fast, but it swooned. The pet name that you hadn’t heard in so long was finally back, and throughout the whole day on the beach, you were wondering when or if he would call you that again. And when you finally heard it, the words were soft and slick like butter like you wanted to indulge into the sweetness of his words.

Your eyes welled up with tears, “I’ve been wanting to hear you say that again for so long.”

“Then I should’ve said it earlier, but I didn’t know if I was crossing the line.”

“You’re never crossing the line with me,”

Harry smiled, showing his dimples that you’ve missed, and he placed his hands on the side of your face before kissing your forehead softly, lingering his lips a little longer than he should have, but you didn’t mind whatsoever.

He let go, raking his hands down both of your arms before holding your hand with his. “I should get going.”

“Okay,” you responded as you nodded your head. He let go of one hand as he tried to walk away, but the hand that was still holding his, pulled him back. Harry studied your face as a frown was present.

“Listen to me, okay? When I say I’ll see you soon, I don’t mean six months anymore. I mean in the next couple of days, but right now we have to get back to our friends, alright?” He said, looking you intently in the eyes. You sighed and nodded, believing that it won’t be months on end until you see him again. “Never gonna go that long without seeing you again. Hurts too much,” he pulled you in for one last hug, kissing the top of your head. “I’ll see you soon—I mean it,” he said once he let go.

“Okay. I’ll see you soon, honey,” you let go of his hands as he slowly walked away. From a distance, he blew you a big kiss, and you caught his air kiss as you made a fist and brought it to your heart. “I’ll be waiting for the real thing!” You called out and you saw him smile widely.

“Oh, I’ll definitely be there to give it to you! Soon, my sweet girl!” He yelled out back to you before blowing you multiple more kisses.

At this point, you couldn’t stop beaming as you watched him walk away from your line of vision. The last time you watched him leave had ended in heartbreak, followed by heartache. But this time, you smiled as you watched him leave, knowing that you would be able to see him very soon and not wonder when you would.

And you couldn’t wait to see his bright eyes and beautiful smile again, and of course, give a kiss to his pink lips.

come chat with me in my inbox!

CHAPTER SIX WILL BE POSTED SOON!

taglist babies: @froggystyles @outofsstyles @whoschantel @4592222 @groovybaybee @bfharry @wellbafineline @tfonty @bfilipa52 @afire-hes @thorsangel @brrilliant-harry @apples2019 @bbymichelleee @harrys-cherrry @ggaayyyong @heslilac @hufflepuff-always-and-forever @sozvuchiy @mellamolayla @eviewildflower @pcterparxer

#cloud nine #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #harry styles dirty imagine #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #bi!reader #harry styles writing #harry styles series #actor!harry #boyfriend!harry #hs #harry #harry styles

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starsbythepocketful12 · 4 years

Text

headcanons cause i’m in flarrie hours

they are THE couple when it comes to halloween costumes

all their outfits for big events (parties, gigs where dirty candy and/or jatp perform) are coordinated

carrie my femme queen & flynn my nonbinary lesbian darling

go to protests & marches together

flynn lends carrie books by her favorite Black female authors & carrie lends her books by her favorite sapphic poets

they make playlists about each other but the other doesn’t know they do it (julie & kayla are the only ones permitted to know of the existence of these playlists & have been sworn to secrecy, though julie has a strong suspicion carrie also makes playlists about flynn and vice versa)

have a joint pinterest account for their wedding moodboard

carrie adopted a tiger cub and named it flynn for their three month anniversary

they go to the mall together every other weekend and shop, which they both love to do and when they get home they always model the new outfits they bought

flynn squeals every time they see a dog in public and always runs over and asks if they can pet it and carrie always watches her with such a fond look that the owner almost always makes a comment on what a lovely couple they are or asks how long they’ve been together (something that has actually been happening since even before they were dating, and back then you can imagine the flustered ness it caused)

flynn often comes to watch dirty candy rehearsals, cheer them on, make sure they’re staying hydrated/taking snack breaks and that carrie’s not overworking herself

carrie is the first person that flynn tells she wants to DJ professionally and carrie gets her her first gig

eventually flynn gets into producing as well and ends up making a track for carrie, who writes lyrics to it and it becomes dirty candy’s most successful song to date

carrie says i love you first one saturday afternoon while they’re watching a movie on flynn’s computer in her room. flynn laughs at a joke and carrie looks over at her, her beautiful, incredible girlfriend, and simply can’t resist the urge to say it

flynn’s shocked into silence so carrie panics and leaves and doesn’t answer flynn’s messages

that night flynn shows up at the wilson mansion and throws rocks at carrie’s window until she comes out

flynn is upset with carrie for running out and ghosting her and carrie’s trying to defend herself so they argue but then flynn interrupts carrie by kissing her and breathlessly saying, “i love you.” carrie kisses her and not another word on it is said

carrie steals flynn’s hats

they’re not really PDA-y, they just happen to engage in a lot of unconscious, casual affection, like flynn often absentmindedly intertwines their pinkies and carrie doesn’t realize her arm is around flynn’s shoulders until she’s doing it

even after months of dating will still flirt like they’re in their enemies who are secretly very attracted to e/o era

flynn really loves art, particularly murals, so she drags carrie to a lot of gallery openings and museums

at one point when flynn’s going through a hard time carrie enlists all their friends for help making a giant mural full of drawings of things that make her happy

flynn happy cries when she sees it and is pretty much always seen hugging carrie for the rest of that night

only really cuddle when one (or both) of them is sleepy, though flynn does often sit on carrie’s lap

before starting to date, carrie would tease flynn for having stuffed animals during their sleepovers at flynn’s until they started dating and flynn started spending more time at carrie’s and flynn discovers that her girlfriend’s a little hypocrite

flynn has a younger sister and brother (sister is six, brother is four) and they absolutely ADORE carrie and think she’s the coolest and carrie thinks they’re the cutest

flynn’s like no they’re little demons and carrie’s says who says demons can’t be cute? you once called me a demon right, and im cute, aren’t i? and flynn rolls her eyes and fights back a smile

flynn also has a college aged older sister who she looks up to a lot, like that’s her hero and absolute role model, so naturally carrie’s terrified to meet her, and though she tries to appear intimidating at first, she can’t keep up the act for long and starts being friendly with carrie pretty much right away

one day they’re supposed to go on a date but carrie’s sick and forgot to text flynn telling her not to come so flynn shows up at her house but stays anyway to look after her

flynn reads to her and makes her soup

trevor & flynn play video games while carrie naps

flynn makes jewelry in her free time and consults carrie for her thoughts on every piece (in junior year she starts selling them at school & turns out to be quite the entrepreneur)

they have an inside joke about cosmo and wanda

a couple of the dirty candy members sometimes jokingly flirt with flynn and are like “watch out! we’re gonna steal your girl!” and carrie gets possessive and apologizes for it pretty quickly but flynn thinks it’s hot so it works out pretty well

will watch bad rom coms to make fun of straight people and throw popcorn at the screen when they get together

pet/nick names: care, baby, babe, love, (from carrie to flynn who shuts down upon hearing it) honey, (flynn to carrie, who becomes very giddy the first time flynn says it in a text message) sweetheart

if you couldn’t tell before they ofc have an enemies to friends to lovers arc

move in together after graduating, neither planning on going to college (julie goes to berkeley and nick some other place in california where they have lacrosse cause that’s the sport he plays right) and their parents think it’ll be a disaster but it actually goes really well

the first couple of weeks they fight more, all petty arguments mostly out of the stress of moving, but they always talk it out

it doesn’t take long for them to be happy they’re living together and feel really glad they took that step

two years after graduating flynn gives her a promise ring

carrie cries her eyes out and replies “of fucking course, you dumb fuck” when flynn asks if she’ll take it

ten years later carrie’s a successful pop star/choreographer & flynn’s a record breaking producer/DJ and they’re about to buy a house when they realize they never got married

it’s just a moment where they’re relaxing together on the couch and suddenly are like. oh

and proceed to burst out laughing

it’s a small ceremony, thrown together in just three weeks

carrie wears a short, light pink dress with a heart cutout in the back that would probably be more suited for a high school sophomore’s spring fling but no one cares

flynn wears a suit, and is walked down the aisle by her older sister

they both tear up upon seeing each other and sob through the vows (the traditional pre written ones, they wrote vows for each other but they recite them to the other when they’re alone, so it’s something special only they can share)

julie & kayla are the maids of honor, nick and alex are the best men

julie & luke’s five year old hernando is the ring bearer & alex and willie’s three year old umi is the flower child

trevor, flynn’s older sister and parents cry

even flynn’s now teenage younger siblings, who as of late have often been stereotypically cynical and moody shed tears

jatp perform at the reception (they have also become a hit band at this point)

when they get back from the honeymoon the first thing they do is get a dog

they adopt a golden doodle rescue named stella

a couple years later they start talking about kids and look into getting a sperm donor

because they love being competitive they do little games to decide who will be the one to carry the baby

it’s all jokes though, they decided at the start of the process that it would be flynn for the first kid and carrie for the second

but then SURPRISE flynn has twins

a boy and a girl named tyler and ollie (who’s who i won’t tell you cause fuck gender)

they don’t even talk about carrie getting pregnant now cause they’re busy with the babies and trying to manage their careers but one night, when the kids are eight, and flynn has just flopped onto the couch with a dramatic sigh after putting them to bed, carrie puts down her kindle and quietly says that she wants another kid.

they talk for hours because while flynn wants another kid too, when you’re both celebrities with demanding jobs and people constantly trying to peer into your life, that decision involves even more factors

they decide to have another kid and carrie chooses to take a step back from her career for now-she’ll return to it eventually but for now she wants to be able to just be a parent without worrying about work and not have to deal with the guilt that comes with working when she feels like she should be being a parent

though the kids have always been their main priority and they have done quite well dividing their time between work and being with them, and have done decently shielding them from the public eye (majority of the pictures of ollie & tyler that the public has are blurry candids, and the few high quality ones are from when they were three and they no longer look like that anyway so it’s all good)

it’s a harder process for carrie to get pregnant as she’s almost 40 and flynn was 31 when she had tyler and ollie

but it happens though they’re careful about choosing the sperm donor-even briefly consider asking reggie or nick-because with this kind of thing there’s always the risk that other parent could track down where their kid ended up and want to be a part of that kid’s life later on which is uber complicated for many reasons so they get those scary possibilities out of the way by just finding someone who they know wants to be in the child’s life

preston choi, a thai & korean american mathematics professor ends up being their guy

he’s immensely genuine, sweet, respectful, polite, and gentlemanly

when he came out at fifteen his parents kicked him out of the house

it was a long and difficult journey but they’re in a decent place now

but it’s not the family he wants to have and he’s tried but has yet to find a partner

but doesn’t want to wait to have kids so here he is, more than happy to co parent with flynn and carrie

so that’s what they do! tyler and ollie become big siblings to miles wilson-choi on december 10th, 2044

miles grows up in the most multicultural home ever, being fluent in 4 languages (English, AAVE, Spanish thanks to their tia julie, Korean, and Thai) all their life

tyler & ollie welcome preston and miles into the family with open arms, as well as the addition of korean and thai cuisine to the already amazing dinner tables they had of soul and caribbean food

when miles is seven carrie goes back to work full time, with preston’s assurance that he’s got this when her and flynn are busy and tyler and ollie (who are now fifteen) promising they’ll help out as well

at that point the long awaited julie and the phantoms/carrie and flynn wilson collaboration FINALLY happens

flynn wins her 28th grammy for it, leaving her tied with beyoncé for most grammys won by any woman ever (its julie’s 14th, luke’s 6th, and carrie’s 12th, and the band’s collective 10th cause alex never did any solo projects and reggie released one country album but it didn’t win any grammys rip though it was nominated for 2 CMAs)

#whew this got away from me #im sorry idk why this ended up being so long #like i legitimately apologize #idk what happened #long post #jatp #julie and the phantoms #flynn jatp #carrie wilson #carrie jatp #flarrie #flarrie jatp #headcanons

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beca-mitchell · 5 years

Text

fool’s gold (1/1)

Summary: Beca finds herself in Colorado bidding on a date with one Chloe Beale. Accidentally, of course. Besides, it’s for charity. Set after PP3.

Word count: 4,216

Rating: T

Read below or on AO3.

Beca finds out about it accidentally. A total accident wherein she did not intend to find out this information. She had been perusing the Bellas groupchat, a chat which she had been slightly too busy to participate in recently, when something caught her eye.

Chloe’s name plus the word “date”. It had taken a few tries and a few shaky swipes of her finger before she figures out that Chloe is participating in some charity event.

Beca hesitates at first, about to type out a message to Chloe right in the groupchat, but she quickly switches over to her private conversation with Chloe and winces when she realizes that her and Chloe haven’t really kept up an ongoing text conversation (and hardly any phone calls) over the past few months.

Beca sighs, flipping back to the groupchat and hoping against hope that somebody else—probably Aubrey or Flo—will ask Chloe about it.

Flo F. What kind of charity is it?

Chloe Every year, the senior vet students run some kind of fundraiser. This year it's for research. In the past, this auction thing has been a huge hit!!

Fat Amy So you’re selling your body? Nothing wrong with that of course.

Chloe No, I’m just…auctioning off a date.

Beca puts her phone down slowly.

Had three and a half years really flown by that quickly? Chloe was almost done with veterinary school and Beca felt like she was still struggling to stay afloat herself.

Well, that was a little untrue. Six Billboard Top 100 hits, a Grammy nomination, a North American tour with an international tour on its way, her first album had gone platinum with the second hot on its heels—

It’s just that Chloe Beale had always seemed so wholly unattainable even with everything that had transpired between them. And Beca wasn’t completely stupid, she knew some of this was her own fault, but life just came at her too fucking fast.

(This being the whole ‘we definitely have feelings for each other but we are also definitely not doing anything about it because one of us is in Colorado and the other is in California sometimes but not always’ thing. God, that always knocked the wind out of Beca. In any case, it had been one weekend of Chloe visiting Los Angeles and a drunken kiss that led to a little more, but nothing really, then an unspoken decision to never speak about it again.

Yeah. This.)

— — — — —

It takes Beca another two hours to finally message Chloe and she almost has a heart attack when she pulls up their conversation.

Chloe’s last sweet dreams! xo stares back at her accusingly.

Beca So, a date huh?

She groans.

Yes, obviously a date. Aubrey already asked for more details an hour ago and the groupchat had long moved on.

Chloe’s reply is nearly instantaneous.

Chloe ??

Beca The whole auction thing you know for charity

Chloe oh haha, yeah. It’ll be nothing. Just some rich student with too much to spend. I don’t have my hopes up or anything.

But if Chloe could have her hopes for somebody in particular…Beca’s fingers tap anxiously on the edge of her table as she stares back at Chloe’s innocent-enough message.

Beca oh, well fingers crossed lol

Chloe yeah.

Beca winces at the one-word response, telling herself not to read too much into it—it doesn’t mean anything, they’re fine, they’re fine, they’re fine—

Chloe I miss you

She sighs in relief.

Beca miss you too chlo

— — — — —

“You didn’t ask her out yet?” is Theo’s confused inquiry. “Wait, you weren’t dating already?”

“Just—just look up flights to Colorado.”

“I’m not your assistant, just in case you forgot.”

“I know, but Jeff’s on the fritz today and I don’t need another snide remark from him.”

“Snide remark? About what?”

“…about Chloe.”

“Ah.”

— — — — —

Beca isn’t sure how she ends up here, but she ends up doing some casual research about this supposed senior tradition at CSU’s veterinary college and it ends up being more of a thing than Beca originally expects. Like a super serious thing where people buy tickets to attend.

All proceeds go to the National Animal Disease Center and the Animal Welfare Institute. Tickets at the door will be $55.

Beca stares at the long list of details and scrolls for an embarrassing amount of time until she finds a list of “Auction Participants”. She exhales noisily through her nose when she finds Chloe’s name, surprised to see separate profiles attached to all the students participating.

Chloe Beale, Rising 4th Year Veterinary Student, DVM Candidate

Chloe enjoys singing and morning runs. She will probably fight you over whether the CSU Rams could hold up against the Barden University Knights. In her spare time, she enjoys volunteering at Larimer Humane Society as well as the CSU Zoo. You might have seen her running a few weekend educational programs for children 10 and under.

PS. She’s single!

Beca isn’t sure what grates on her more, the fact that the description doesn’t say anything about how Chloe hums her favorite songs when she gets nervous, or how Chloe’s hair grows at least a shade and a half lighter during the summer, or—or how Chloe can talk at length about nearly anything if she thinks it’s something that another person will find interesting. She is selfless and beautiful inside and out.

And that last line. Beca’s fist clenches. She isn’t sure why it annoys her so much, but she hates the idea of this auction gimmick even if she knows instinctively that it is all in good fun and Chloe genuinely wouldn’t have consented to it if she didn’t believe in it or trust everybody who would be participating. Still, maybe Beca doesn’t want Chloe to…be single.

Her brow furrows at that last tapered-off thought.

To distract herself, she taps Theo’s number into her phone and waits with bated breath.

“Hello?”

“Did you book the ticket yet?” she asks in lieu of greeting.

She’ll let his amused chuckle slide this once.

— — — — —

So maybe it isn’t really an accident.

She’s in Fort Collins, Colorado, on a beautiful but pretty damn chilly campus. Beca pulls her windbreaker tighter around herself and tugs her scarf up over her mouth and nose. She hasn’t been recognized yet, but she has a suspicion that there have been two young ladies following her, but she can’t be certain.

Though her fame is manageable, it still flares up unexpectedly and at inopportune times.

Like the last time she had visited Chloe on campus and they had spent the weekend eating at Chloe’s favorite spots and drinking cheap wine until they were laughing and leaning heavily against each other. Beca had loved the scent of Chloe’s shampoo as it wafted up from where Chloe had her head pressed against Beca’s shoulder and neck, her giggles tapering off into nothing. Back then, they hadn’t kissed yet—Beca was still recovering from the sting of seeing Chloe kiss Chicago even though it had happened months prior, but nothing had ever transpired.

And for a moment, when Chloe lifted her head off Beca’s shoulder, Beca had thought Chloe was going to kiss her. And she wouldn’t have minded, not at all. It had been something she had been thinking about for so long that Beca’s heart began to pound in anticipation. Then Chloe’s roommate had let herself into the apartment despite Chloe’s insistence they were going to be alone and she had recognized Beca surprisingly quick considering Beca had only one or two viral music videos released at the time. Beca hadn’t been sure, but Chloe had looked supremely disappointed.

Focusing back on the present, Beca gazes at the familiar, yet unfamiliar campus. She had made sure earlier that there hadn’t been a completely strict dress code for the event and opts for a loose wool sweater and nice jeans (a memory of Chloe’s fleeting “those jeans make your ass look good” passes through her mind, but she pays it no mind). She buys a lanyard with the CSU name and mascot emblazoned on it. Just to add to the look.

She finds the student center soon enough. Happy to be out of the chill for a moment, Beca pulls her scarf down but leaves her toque on, keeping it tight over her eyebrows.

“Hey,” a voice calls instantly and Beca jumps because for a moment, it sounds like Chloe. But that would be impossible, she’s barely been there five seconds— “I know you, you’re Chloe’s friend, right?”

Beca turns to see young man, around her age, smiling in a completely nonthreatening manner. She vaguely recognizes him from some of Chloe’s social media posts, but she can’t quite place his name. “Hi,” she says instead.

“Did Chloe invite you to this?” he asks, sounding entirely too amused for Beca’s liking.

“Uh…” Beca isn’t sure what the better answer would be—yes, Chloe invited poor hapless Beca Mitchell to watch her get auctioned off and alternatively the implication that Chloe would need some pull from somebody like Beca which is dumb because despite the crappy dating profile on the website, Chloe needs no help at all; or no, Beca invited herself because she’s there on a mission. “Hm,” she says evasively instead. “Sorry, what was your name again?”

“Benjamin, but you can call me—”

Beca smiles. “Ben,” she finishes. It’s cute how much he reminds her of Benji. “Chloe posts about you a lot.”

“Yeah, we kind of…” he laughs, pushing up his glasses. “Bonded, I guess. She’s been a good friend. Helped set me up with my boyfriend.” He nods his head towards the door. “Want to come sit with us? We’re mainly here for the show and the food. Do you have your ticket?”

Beca blushes but tamps it down as best as she can. “Uh no, I was gonna buy at the door.”

He grins again, but says nothing about that. “Okay, we’ll see you inside. We’re kind of near the back. Turn left when you get in.”

— — — — —

The emcee is fairly decent and Beca cracks a laugh at a few jokes. She has a pretty good view of the stage and she feels comfortable enough sitting near Chloe’s friends. They seem to take a shine to her and teasingly press an auction paddle into her hands.

“For an emergency,” Ben says, mirth in his eyes. And something akin to knowing, as if he knows something Beca doesn’t. She tries to scowl at him, but she misses that opportunity because Chloe is being walked on stage looking like—

“Oh,” Beca murmurs, blushing when she can feel eyes on her. There is no way Chloe can see her in the crowd because she’s sure the spotlight is bright enough based on Chloe’s squint and embarrassed smile. But otherwise, Chloe looks stunning, wearing a pretty blue sundress and white doctor’s coat. Beca blinks back the unexpected surge of emotion—not quite tears, but her eyes do sting a little—that she gets upon seeing Chloe in person for the first time in at least a year.

God, she had gone a whole year without seeing Chloe’s face—without having Chloe’s hands to hold and Chloe’s arms around her.

She never wants to do that again. She never wants to be apart from Chloe for that long, too afraid of her own feelings to push for something she knows Chloe wants as well. She had seen it in Chloe’s eyes over the past decade and more of knowing her. Chloe, her best friend and confidante—the person who most got on her nerves but also knew how to put her back together in more ways than one—

“We’ll start the bidding at fifty dollars! Ten-dollar interval minimum, please and thank you.”

There’s some cheering and laughter in the crowd from a group near the front. Chloe blushes again under the spotlight, but she flips off the group whom Beca assumes consists of people Chloe knows well enough.

“That’s kind of low,” Beca comments.

“You should bid,” Vlad, Ben’s boyfriend, suggests.

“No, I’m just here for support,” Beca replies distractedly as another person bids up to $100. Beca’s fingers tighten momentarily around the paddle before she relaxes and wills herself to scan the crowd as nonchalantly as possible. But before she can really settle down—

“Two hundred!”

It’s arguably the biggest jump Beca has heard over the last few auctions and the murmur that rushes through the crowd indicates that they think it’s something worthwhile as well.

Beca tries not to think about how she made two-hundred dollars in the first minute—probably less—of releasing her second single on Spotify.

“Two-fifty,” a female voice calls out, distinctly confident and self-assured. Beca notes that the blush on Chloe’s face is a little different now, this time a little shy and demure like she knows that person and is touched by the gesture.

“Who is that?” Beca asks quickly.

“Oh, I think that was Amelia,” Vlad says when he notices that his boyfriend is not responding. “She’s in Chloe’s cohort.”

But who is she, Beca wants to demand further.

“Two-seventy,” the same male voice from earlier counters, though with a tinge of hesitation.

“Three hundred,” ‘Amelia’ counters.

A pause. “Three-twenty.”

“Four-fifty.” Without hesitation. An excited murmur ripples through the crowd. Chloe’s hands are now covering her face, but Beca sees that she’s smiling ever so slightly.

“She likes her,” Ben says simply.

“Who likes who.” Beca considers this a very important distinction.

“Amelia likes Chloe.”

“And does Chloe like Amelia?”

“They’re friends.” He stares at Beca pointedly. “Like you guys are friends, right? So what’s a little competition.”

“But Chloe and I are—we’re—”

Beca finds she has no real justification, no real insight to offer because she and Chloe have been teetering on that edge of almost for so long that she has forgotten what it meant when competition came along.

Until Chicago.

And before that, for Chloe, Jesse, but Beca had been nearly completely blind to it.

And now this.

Beca’s hand is rising before she can stop herself. Her brain seems to shut down completely—the rational part at least—as her heart grabs the reins. It’s stupid, it’s archaic, but this is for Chloe (almost literally, but Beca will never succumb to the belief that this is any valid way to date somebody). “Seven hundred,” she calls out. Her eyes widen when heads swivel to her and she quickly ducks, pulling her scarf back up to her nose and mouth. She waves her paddle above her head, too embarrassed to see whether Chloe’s eyes are scanning the crowd for her.

“Holy shit,” Ben mutters.

“Eight hundred,” Amelia counters somewhere in the distance, but suddenly Beca’s ears are roaring with the oddest sound—like a chorus of fucking angels or something.

“Oh my God, the animals are lucky today,” somebody mutters somewhere to Beca’s left.

“A thousand,” Beca counters.

“Um—” Ben seems to think better of it and clamps his mouth shut, though he looks like he might laugh, or worse, smile at Beca. God.

“A thousa—”

Beca’s had it. “Two thousand!”

The shocked silence that follows is enough to tell Beca that she’s completely lost it.

(But she lost it long ago—somewhere between agreeing to join an all-female acapella group when she was eighteen because of that girl with blue eyes and a killer voice and that chaotic year that followed, somehow ending with her kissing the wrong person at the end of it all. No more of that.)

“Um,” the auctioneer has apparently lost all capabilities of auctioneering. “I…guess…? Sold to—” He peers over the crowd. “You?” he asks again, still unsure. “For two thousand dollars.”

Beca quickly presses the paddle into Ben’s hands and sinks lower in her seat, distinctly avoiding all eye contact. Those closest to her finally seem to catch on and she catches the faintest hint of whispers.

“Is that…?”

“No fucking way.”

“God, I knew Beale was lying when she said they weren’t hooking up.”

Beca tries not to think about any of that, suddenly very interested in the patterns on the carpeted floor.

— — — — —

Beca i did something really stupid

Aubrey Yes, the auction was livestreamed. Chloe sent me a link.

Beca holy fuck could you see me???

Aubrey No, but thank you for confirming. Two thousand dollars, Beca Mitchell.

Beca is about to type something incredibly cheesy in response to the mild snark in Aubrey’s text, but she is distracted by Ben’s shadow appearing over her.

“Hey, so uh, you have to actually meet Chloe backstage. To set up the details and stuff. And they’re going to need a check or some other form of payment? For that two thousand dollars you just dropped?”

“Do they accept Amex,” Beca deadpans.

“Yes, I believe so. So now that that’s covered, shall we?” He holds out an arm for Beca.

Beca sighs and clicks off her phone, decidedly ignoring the very long paragraph of text Aubrey just sent to her (she caught words like “my best friend” and “hurt her” and “bear trap” so she figures that’s something she can laugh or cry over when she is inevitably sent back on a plane to Los Angeles).

“Does she know it’s me?” Beca finally asks.

“I honestly don’t know. You’re kind of short and I don’t think she could actually see you.”

“Oh, that’s good,” Beca says, feeling lightheaded.

“It’s going to be fine.”

“Yeah, of course, why wouldn’t it be? We’re friends. We’ve done stupid shit before. She stayed back three years to just be part of an acapella group.” And to be with you, an annoying voice sounds in her head.

Oh, that was actually Ben. Who sounded eerily like Aubrey in that moment. Beca steps away from him.

He stares at her pointedly, pointing at the door.

Fuck, Beca thinks.

It is a simple study room and when Beca opens it, she isn’t expecting the space to be so small and so brightly lit. She winces immediately and nearly steps back out, but Chloe’s gasp is enough to keep her rooted to the spot.

“Beca,” Chloe squeaks. “What the fu—what are you doing here?”

“Hi,” Beca says, waving. Chloe continues to gape at her. “Hi?” Beca tries again.

Before she realizes what’s happening, Chloe is flying towards her and wrapping her arms so tightly around Beca that all the air rushes out of her in one fell swoop. She has enough sense to grip tightly at the back of Chloe’s coat, her fingers scrabbling on the thick, coarse fabric until they settle easily into each other like no time had passed before.

Beca sighs—literally sighs—like a disgusting teenager in love and she kind of thinks Chloe does the same before Chloe is pulling back and punching her in the arm oncee she’s at arm’s length.

“Ow! What the hell?”

“You seriously paid two thousand dollars?”

Oh right, that happened and was still happening.

“It was an accident,” Beca says instinctively and defensively.

“You raised the price by a thousand dollars accidentally,” Chloe clarifies.

“Don’t—don’t call it a price, like you’re…” Beca gestures uncomfortably. “Like you’re on sale or something. And I totally believe it’s your right to do what you want with your body and stuff because you should be allowed to have all that agency and—”

“Wow, Beca slow down.” Chloe grins affectionately. “Nobody’s doing anything with my body, not without my permission anyway. These things usually just end in a quick dinner or like. Laser tag or something. It’s never that serious.”

“I knew that,” Beca says quickly, trying to ignore her own blush at Chloe’s choice of words. “I just…I wanted to be…I wanted to,” she takes a steadying breath, “go on a date with you. And be your girlfriend. And do couple-y things. Because we’d be dating…as girlfriends.”

“You did?” Chloe asks quietly and so delicately that Beca’s breath catches. She tries to maintain eye contact as best as she can.

The air around them feels so heavy. “So much.”

“So you…” Chloe’s brow furrows. “Came to Colorado and paid two thousand dollars to go on a date with me? And I’m assuming you flew…so even more than two thousand dollars.”

“I…it sounds weird. I know. I’m weird. I just—” Beca heaves a breath. “I panicked, okay? I had this crazy vision of you ending up with somebody…with somebody else. That wasn’t me. And that sounds crazy jealous and crazy possessive and I have no right, but I’ve been thinking about you so much and I don’t know that I’ve ever really stopped thinking about you since that first day at the activities fair that entire fucking lifetime ago.” Beca feels winded suddenly and quickly looks up at Chloe with desperation. “I should have just…” she trails off, unsure.

She should have never let Chloe slip away the first time. Then the second time when she had the chance. When Chloe met her in the middle so many times before.

“Beca,” Chloe whispers, pulling her out of her swirling thoughts. “It’s…” She struggles to think of a word for a moment. “It’s okay. I’m not mad, I promise. It’s just…a lot.”

“I’m just so sorry because it seems like I’m always like…just one step off from you. And I just want to be on the same page. I want to be what you deserve.”

“Me too,” Chloe replies, reaching forward to take Beca’s hand. She doesn’t hold Beca’s hand however, opting instead to gently grip her wrist, her thumb beginning to trace soothing circles along her wristbone. “I want to be what you deserve too.”

Beca swallows the immediate protest. She lets it die in her throat because she knows Chloe is right—that they have so much to work on. But they can do it together.

“Things have been weird between us, haven’t they?” Beca asks quietly. She fixes her gaze on the “Since you came to visit me. And we…” she swallows. “We kissed.”

“We did,” Chloe murmurs.

“And have things been weird?” Beca presses.

“A little,” Chloe admits after a pause. “But things have always been a little weird between us.” A small smile slips across her lips as she uses her free hand to tilt Beca’s chin up so their gazes meet once more. “But I’ve liked that.”

“You have?”

Chloe shrugs. “Kind of.”

“We…we don’t have to go on this date, you know?” Beca clarifies, eyes flicking between Chloe’s eyes and her lips frantically. Chloe draws closer. “We…” Beca’s voice cracks. “Don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“What do you want to do?” Chloe asks, her finger still tracing the underside of Beca’s jaw and the side of her neck.

Beca’s eyes flutter shut. “I want to kiss you again. If that’s okay.”

“Do you…” Chloe’s breath is warm against Beca’s mouth as she moves closer still. “Do you…have another thousand dollars?”

Beca’s eyes would fly open if she weren’t completely lost in the sensation of both of Chloe’s hands coming up to tangle into her hair. She moans at the sensation before she can help herself and immediately closes the distance between them, their lips bumping uncomfortably for a second before they settle into a somewhat familiar rhythm. Just like that, with a hint of banter and the way their touches soothe each other, they settle back into familiarity—back into what made them work all those years ago.

Instantly, Chloe’s body seems to press into hers with ease. Chloe’s head tilts and her mouth parts and Beca just about loses her mind. She reaches up to grab Chloe’s shoulders with difficulty before she moves her hands down to hold Chloe’s waist while subtly tugging her closer. Chloe sighs a little into the kiss before she pulls back with Beca’s lower lip trapped between her teeth for a brief moment.

Beca shudders. “Unfair,” she murmurs, momentarily forgetting her own name. Chloe’s name. Amelia. Ben.

There is nothing but this moment, with Beca’s heart threatening to burst from nerves and excitement and passion and sheer joy at the feeling of having the woman she loves in her arms once more.

“Never wait that long to ask me out again,” Chloe teases, pressing her forehead against Beca’s. “This was like…weirdly romantic, but I don’t need you to drop two thousand dollars. No matter how rich you are, miss Grammy nominee.”

Beca tilts her head to steal another kiss. “Again? As in we’re going to have multiple dates.”

“If you play your cards right.” Chloe’s nose brushes against Beca’s lightly. “Not your fancy credit card though.”

“Oh,” Beca says because Chloe’s hands are tugging through her hair again and somehow her toque is on the floor and they’re kissing again.

She could get used to this.

But of course:

“Wait ‘til I tell the girls you paid two thousand dollars to go on a date with me.” She doesn't need to sound so smug, but Beca would be remiss if she didn't acknowledge how hot Chloe sounds saying that.

It isn’t an accident that Beca shuts her up with a kiss.

fin.

#bechloe #fanfiction #pitch perfect #beca mitchell #chloe beale #my fanfic #mine #text #fool's gold

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howaminotinthestrokesyet · 3 years

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Behind The Album: St. Anger/Some Kind of Monster

St. Anger

Metallica‘s eighth studio album was released in 2003 produced for the last time by Bob Rock. The record has largely been seen as the worst one ever released by the band. Some very troublesome issues led up to the making of this release beginning in January 2001 when Jason Newsted quit the group. He had come to the other band members as they began talks about a new album with the request to wait a year, so he could work on his side project band Echobrain . James Hetfield flatly refused in not allowing this to occur. He was rumored to say this at the time of Newsted’s request. “When someone does a side project, it takes away from the strength of Metallica", and that a side project is "like cheating on your wife in a way.” The bassist argued that Hetfield had contributed to the South Park film’s soundtrack, as well as to Corrosion of Conformity albums. The singer responded by saying that he never included his name to those titles and absolutely did not try to sell it. On January 17, Jason Newsted released a statement resigning from Metallica. He was quitting for “private and personal reasons, and the physical damage I have done to myself over the years while playing the music that I love.” Years later, Lars Ulrich would say in an interview that unfortunately Newsted had to be sacrificed in order to save the band. There existed deeper issues between himself and James Hetfield that still needed to be addressed. He further said that the band as it exists now is how they should have existed when Newsted was a member of the group.

Metallica still decided to proceed with a new album anyway as they hired Joe Berlinger and Bruce Sinofski to document via film the entire recording process. Three months later James Hetfield put the entire project on hold as he entered rehab for alcoholism and other addictions. He would get out of rehab in December 2001, but the band would not enter the studio until April 2002. Upon his return, he was only allowed to work four hours a day because the rest of his time was to be spent with his family. Due to Metallica‘s internal issues along with Hetfield’s return from rehab, the band hired a personal enhancement coach by the name of Phil Towle to work through their issues. For his part, Newsted would make the comment that the decision to hire a therapist was "really fucking lame and weak.” The day that he actually quit came after a 9.5 hour band meeting that would be the first one with Towle. All of this would be documented in the film Some Kind of Monster, which depicts Metallica almost breaking up in the most honest music film probably ever portraying an actual train wreck happening in front of your eyes.

In May 2002, the band actually sat down and started recording the actual album at what is called HQ, their own studio in San Rafael, California. The decision was made to have Bob Rock play bass on the album instead of hiring a new person immediately. They would record the record, then look for someone after the fact. James Hetfield would say this about the record. “There's two years of condensed emotion in this. We've gone through a lot of personal changes, struggles, epiphanies, it's deep. It's so deep lyrically and musically. [St. Anger] is just the best that it can be from us right now." From the outset, the group wanted to create a very raw type of sound to symbolize the state of their emotions over the previous couple of years. The album also represented another major departure for the band as they embraced aspects of nu metal, speed metal, and alternative metal. They worked with Rock to make an album that embraced an unpolished sound, which meant he barely mixed the recording at all. He would elaborate on the entire thought process of St. Anger’s production. “We wanted to do something to shake up radio and the way everything else sounds. To me, this album sounds like four guys in a garage getting together and writing rock songs. There was really no time to get amazing performances out of James. We liked the raw performances. And we didn't do what everyone does and what I've been guilty of for a long time, which is tuning vocals. We just did it, boom, and that was it." Another fateful decision came in the fact that Kirk Hammett did not play any guitar solos on the album. He would later say in an interview that they tried to use some, but it kept sounding like an afterthought rather than an organic part of the song. The biggest criticism of St. Anger represented the drumming of Lars Ulrich, who made the decision not to use a snare on his snare drum. Ulrich said, "One day I forgot to turn the snare on because I wasn't thinking about this stuff. At the playbacks, I decided I was really liking what I was hearing—it had a different ambience. It sang back to me in a beautiful way." This makes the drumming sound include a giant ringing noise throughout the 75 minute LP.

Metallica would release the new album in June 2003, but they did so five days ahead of schedule due to their ongoing battle with Napster. They did not want any songs to be illegally downloaded and leaked ahead of time. The release debuted at number one on the Billboard chart selling 417,000 copies in its first week. The lead single “St. Anger” would go on to win a Grammy for Best Metal Song. Three other singles were released with the second track “Frantic” going all the way to number two on the mainstream rock charts. Reviews by critics were mixed over the band’s new sound. They liked the raw passion found on the album, but they continually commented that it sounded terrible. Adrien Begran of Pop Matters had this observation. “While it's an ungodly mess at times, what you hear on this album is a band playing with passion for the first time in years." Other reviews remained positive like Rolling Stone praised the band for stripping down metal to its bare essentials without the need for solos, choruses, and any kind of structure whatsoever. Other critics were not so complimentary of the record. Pitchfork had this to say about it. Ulrich was “playing a drum set consisting of steel drums, aluminum toms, programmed double kicks, and a broken church bell. The kit's high-end clamor ignored the basic principles of drumming: timekeeping. Hetfield and Hammett's guitars underwent more processing than cat food. When they both speedstrummed through St. Anger, and most other movements, [Hetfield and Hammett] seemed to overwhelm each other with different, terrible noise. Also the duration of most songs made it boring to hear them." Ouch. Years later, Lars would still stand behind his decision about the snare drum on the album. James Hetfield also agreed that he would not change it, but did note that production mistakes may have been made. “St. Anger could use a little less tin snare drum, but those things are what make those records part of our history."

Some Kind of Monster

The minute the filmmakers came in around April 2001, Metallica seemed to be slowly imploding. There existed a definite tension between all the band members as they were struggling to come up with new ideas for music, while at the same time wanting drastically to get away from one another. One issue became an even greater snag when Hetfield left for rehab, but they continued to film Hammett and Ulrich’s therapy sessions. Berlinger would say this about filming those meetings. “Lars felt the therapy sessions were actually enabled by the presence of the cameras. He felt the cameras forced them to be honest." Upon Hetfield’s return from rehab, the singer wondered whether they should even continue filming the sessions, but changed his mind once he saw the raw footage. Elektra Records now began to become concerned over the rising cost of the filming and wondered whether they should turn it into a reality show. Metallica told them that they had envisioned a documentary film, so they bought the rights to it for $4.3 million. Hetfield continued to have some misgivings about various scenes included in the film. For example, Lars and his wife sell an art piece for $13.4 million at an auction, which he thought was “downright embarrassing.” The drummer would not relent on this saying that his passion for art is a vital piece of his personality. “If you're going to paint a portrait of the people in Metallica, that has to play a role, because that is who I am."

The documentary’s plot also included some very strange and surreal scenes. For one, Lars interviews Dave Mustaine of Megadeth asking him about the past. Another scene shows all three band members attending a live concert by Newsted’s band Echobrain, where you can see Lars complain about not being able to keep his own band together. As recording begins, Hetfield and Ulrich go to war with one another. The singer demands the conditions that any recorded material can only be discussed in his presence. The drummer comes back at him saying that he is too controlling which led to a major confrontation. Hetfield then says to the camera that his need to control everything probably stems from his fear of abandonment in childhood. For his part, Kirk Hammett always remained calm no matter what does to a lesser extent complain about the complete absence of guitar solos. Gradually, their chemistry begins to improve as they work toward the finished product. They begin to work a lot of their problems out by writing lyrics to individual songs. Ulrich is able to release some feelings about the Napster lawsuit by writing the lyrics to “Shoot Me Again.” As the band begins to get along much better, they stop listening to any advice from Towle. The group thinks that he has become too much a part of their inner circle, so the need arose to distance themselves from him. The therapist becomes very defensive when they approach him about restricting access. Towards the end of the film, they hire Robert Trujillo as their new bassist because they were scheduled to perform on MTV Icon. A bone of contention over the years was the fact that Trujillo’s $1 million signing bonus was included in the film. Upon the movie’s release, Some Kind of Monster received mostly positive reviews by critics earning an 89 on Rotten Tomatoes. Owen Gleiberman of Entertainment Weekly said this, “One of the most revelatory rock portraits ever made."

Lars Ulrich would say upon reflection that it was one of the first times that the band had actually communicated with each other without the assistance of alcohol. Dave Mustaine caused a little bit of drama as he denied the band from using any footage of his interview with Lars in 2001. They still included the footage because he had previously signed a release giving them access and the right to use it. The Megadeth singer would call this the “final betrayal” until six years later when they reconciled during a concert. At the time, Ulrich responded by saying this about Mustaine. “So put these three facts down, he was in our band for a year. He never played on a Metallica record [official release], and it was 22 years ago. It's pretty absurd that it still can be that big a deal."

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neverleaveyoubehind · 4 years

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Teen Wolf : 1x01 “Wolf Moon”

OMG they look so young! This whole episode has made me feel so old, I can’t believe that it’s been 9 years since this aired. I still remember watching this after middle school and now, it’s been almost a decade, I’m in college , I’m a full adult, unbelievable!

Let’s proceed with the actual reaction, though.

The first scene it’s surprisingly good, I mean, the way it starts all somber with the creepy music, you see all the police department and the Sheriff arriving to the woods, all the police dogs barking , the fog ,... I really liked it. Actually, I had forgotten about this scene in particular.

Like, we actually get to see the Sheriff a little bit, in my mind we weren’t introduced to the Sheriff until later in the episode. That was cool, knowing that he’s the first important character we see (even though you need to be paying a lot of attention to see that it’s him, because they just focus on showing his arm or something like that )

Suddenly, the music changes into an upbeat song, and we are in Scotts house. (God, seeing Scott fixing the Lacrosse stick gave me ALL the nostalgic feelings I could handle) Tyler Posey looks so young, like a little baby, he changes so much during the years. Not like Dylan who looks exactly the same but , with longer hair 9 years later.

Anyway, we have baby Scott (that’s how I will be referring to him for the next 2 seasons aprox) working out , being teenagery , brushing his teeth (his sink worried me a bit, maybe they should think about investing in a new one ‘cause that one looks nasty) Then, he hears a noise and freaks out. BTW, Scotts hair is a whole situation, it’s way too long for such a small face.

He freaks out, gets out of the house with a baseball bat,which might have been the highlight of my day (also,the baseball bat as a deathly weapon was Scott’s idea first ,ladies and gentlemen, let’s take that into consideration) and we are finally introduced to Stiles.

What better way to introduce him than having him hanging for his first 2 minutes on screen? (he being completely unfazed by it, and carrying the conversation like nothing was wrong, is my favorite thing in the world and the reason why I love Stiles so much) if this whole scene isn’t the reason why everyone kept watching the pilot, Idk what to tell you.

Ok, then, after the best interaction ever, Stiles has somewhat convinced Scott to go look for the body in the woods. Because, yes people, there’s a body , this body is missing a half and Stiles wants to find it. Like, of course he does, this man thinks he’s a detective or something (And yes, I did say a half because we don’t know which part is missing) So, in what has to be the most teenager/peer pressure way (reluctantly following your best friend trough the woods with a murderer on the loose) our story begins.

We have Stiles and Scott walking around trying to find the body (every sentence that leaves Dylan's mouth during this episode is gold, that's really my opinion) Scotty is worried about the prospect of founding not only the body but, the murderer, Stiles is living his best life, joking around, walking way too fast for our asthmatic baby Scott, and that's how they get separated.

We properly meet one of the best characters of the show, the sheriff Stilinski, after Stiles gets scared by another deputy that thinks he’s the murderer, and Stiles leaves with his dad. So, now we have us a baby Scott walking alone, in the dark, back home.

He’s walking for a bit, with creppy background music and various animal noises (the music and the ambiance of this show are great. Props to the music team, honestly) Then, he reaches a clearing in the middle of the forest, takes out his inhaler, and when he is about to use it, a bunch of deer bump into him causing him to fall to the ground and drop the inhaler. (I bet he was more worried about dying crushed by deer than losing it, though) When the deer have gone their merry way,and he no longer thinks he’s going to die, he gets up and starts looking for the inhaler with the light of his cell phone (with the light of the screen to be precise. Scotty isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed), but he doesn’t find his inhaler, he finds... The body (the upper part, in case someone was wondering)

Then, Scotty jumps back from the scare, and falls down a hill. When he gets up, a huge black monster attacks him and baby Scott gets bitten!

(The CGI of the first season is truly horrifying but, don’t panic my friends, it will get better)

Baby Scott runs as good as he can manage ,after being bitten by an unknown huge thing and having lost his inhaler,through the woods until he reaches the road, where he is almost hit by a car (our homeboy Scotty is having a really bad night)

SPOILER

The fact that he gets almost run over by Allison and her mom , who aren’t even in the show yet is amazing. Jeff did truly love this 2 because their storyline is truly wonderful, their whole relationship is handled with such care and a lot of attention to details. It makes my heart soft.

SPOILER

They go to school, Jackson looks like an asshole and turns out to be an asshole, normal High School shit. Scotty shows Stiles his bandage and tells him that a wolf bit him, then Stiles proceeds to laugh his ass off because there hasn’t been wolfs in California in like 60 years (Stiles is the kind of person that knows that type of thing) and , baby Scott tells him that he found the body.

Then this whole hilarious scene happens:

They go to class and Scotty starts hearing a phone ringing and turns out he’s the only one hearing it (obviously dude, you’re a werewolf) because it’s the phone of a new girl that’s outside of the High School waiting for the headmaster (I guess, I though someone else was but maybe that hasn’t happened,yet) this new girl is talking on the phone with her mom and she realizes that she forgot to bring a pen (really? You forget to bring a pen to your first day of High School? Someone wasn’t prepared)

So the headmaster brings the new girl to Scotty’s class , her name is Allison, and baby Scott has a crush on her the second he sees her (puppy love has never been more fitting )

Then, he does that whole thing of giving her a pen that she didn’t ask for (if I was Allison I’d be creeped out that someone just gave me a pen after I said outside of the building that I didn’t have one but, IDK, maybe it’s just me)

Anyway, Lydia and Allison become BFFs ,they have Lacrosse practice (we hear the Lacrosse background music for the first time) and surprise, Baby Scott didn’t suck (we also meet Coach aka the most important person of Beacon Hills high school) After school Stiles and Scott go back to the wood to look for the body and the inhaler (seriously, do this kids never learn?) while Stiles jokes about Scotty being a werewolf,and Derek Hale makes his first appearance (God Derek looks like Edward Cullen in this episode) he gives Scott his inhaler back and tells them to get out of his property (like an old man)

Stiles tells Scotty that almost all of Derek’s family died in a fire in his house and baby Scott leaves to go to work. He goes to feed the cats and they freak out, Allison comes to the vet hysterical with a dog she run over , this cutie moment happens :

Baby Scott is in love, so he asks her out to Lydia’s party that friday, Allison is also in love so she says yes. Scotty goes to sleep feeling on cloud nine and wakes up in the middle of the woods (it was a full moon the night before) he sees the big monster that attacked him the other night starts running and ends up falling in someone’s pool (Baby Scott is way to ripped for an asthmatic little kid but, ok)

He goes to school , Jackson interrogates him about steroids (fuck off Jackson, no one likes you. Well, maybe Lydia, but that’s it) Scotty freaks out about sleepwalking 40 miles into the woods, they go to Lacrosse practice and Scotty makes first line so he’s going to be playing in their first Lacrosse game of the year ,Stiles is suspicious because Scott was awful at Lacrosse like 2 days ago , and suddenly he’s a pro (like he should be, honestly, people should listen to Stiles more)

Stiles goes home researches a freaking ton about lycanthropy and werewolfs and decides that yes, his best friend is a werewolf (just like that, that was his first option and he stuck to it) he calls Scotty, tells him that he should cancel his date with Allison just in case he tries to kill her but Scott ignores him.

Melissa and baby Scott have a nice mother-son moment before his first ever date (with a lot more mentions of teenage pregnancies and underage sex for what one would expect from a first date)

Baby Scott takes Allison to the party, everything is going great, until it isn’t. Suddenly Scott starts feeling the bloodlust and the changes that Stiles had warned him about, so he leaves the party (leaving Allison alone without as mush as an apology, and without a way to get back home) Do not fear, though. Derek offers to take her home so everything’s great.

Scotty goes home while having a whole freak out and tells Stiles (who has followed him because he’s the best friend anyone could ever have) that Derek is the werewolf that bit him. Stiles tells Scotty that Derek took Allison home, Baby Scott leaves to have a fucking argument with Derek, and Stiles goes to Allison’s house (Allison was just fine so Stiles leaves)

Scotty and Derek get attacked by werewolf hunters (needless to say, Scotty won’t be sleeping in a while)

In the morning Stiles picks him up from the woods. At school Scotty apologizes to Allison, she forgives him because they are in love (or stupid , if I had been left like that in the first date I wouldn’t have forgiven him) and we are introduced to Allison’s dad

Wait, did I say Allison’s dad? I meant the werewolf hunter that tried to kill him the night before.

Wow that was a roller coaster of emotions ! What did you guys think? Did you remember all of what actually happens ? Did you also realize that you’ve been mixing what happens in each season together into one big season? Because I did

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shemakesmusic-uk · 4 years

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Jorja Smith has unveiled a standout new video for latest track ‘By Any Means’. The powerful video (directed by Otis Dominique and Ellington Hammond) shines a spotlight on communities across the UK, complimenting the track’s vital message around social issues and the civil rights movement. As noted by Jorja about the track: "The inspiration behind 'By Any Means' really came from going to the Black Lives Matter protest and leaving thinking, what can I do to keep this conversation going? It’s not just a post on social media, it's life.” ‘By Any Means’ is the first track to be unveiled from a new project titled ‘Reprise’, curated by the team at Roc Nation with the sole aim of bringing awareness to social justice issues. A portion of proceeds will go to funding organisations that support victims of police brutality, hate crimes, and other violations of civil rights. [via Dork]

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Madison, WI-bred and Chicago-based band Slow Pulp recently announced Moveys, their self-produced debut album, and shared its first single 'Idaho.' Now the band shares another song off of the forthcoming record, entitled 'Falling Apart.' The track, featuring Alex G collaborator Molly Gemer on violin, is accompanied by a fantastical music video about feeling lost in a familiar landscape. Director Jake Lazovick, places Emily in a transient world, surrounded by flying objects and missing pieces. The clip features nostalgic animations, body doubles for social distancing purposes, and an homage to Massey's background as a ballet dancer. Read more about the song from Massey below: "As we were finishing up writing the album my parents got into a serious car accident and I came back home to help take care of them. A couple of weeks later COVID-19 started getting worse in the US, and quarantine began. Life felt completely surreal, everything had drastically changed and at such a rapid pace. It was especially strange because everyone was experiencing the same thing at the same time, but couldn’t be physically with each other to support each other. I felt like I couldn’t process any emotions I had about the whole ordeal because I had to keep it together to take care of my family. It became easier to stay numb, and create a facade that I was doing ok, than it was to release any type of healthy emotion for a long time. Luckily I did allow myself to have a full on breakdown induced by a stubbed toe and confusion over taxes, sometimes it’s the littlest things that finally get you."

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Soap Detox met a party, and somehow their friendship sustained during the lengthy hangover that followed. A frisky Swedish three-piece with a lust for melody and good times, their raucous garage-pop is already making waves in their homeland. A full EP is incoming, with Soap Detox trailing this with their irresistible new single 'Give Me Gore'. A three minute fuzz pop wonder, it's a clanking, cheeky, subversive statement from a group who thrive on such things. The video features their shorn-headed lead singer in full form, accompanied by her band mates. Directed by Evelyn Del Carmen and Ebba Sylvan, you can check it out above. [via Clash]

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It’s been a decade since we’ve heard from multi-hyphenate musician and producer The Angel, who last made a splash as a musician in 2009 with her single 'Ultra Light,' which featured the singer/producer Jhelisa on vocals. Focusing more on her career in film/TV composition and music production in recent years, she’s planning to return to recording her own music later this year with a new LP entitled Xtra Sensory Goodness. Now we’re getting the first taste of this project, which is yet another collaboration with the vocalist Jhelisa. “Jhelisa and I have become close friends over the years,” she explains. “There’s a lot of sisterly love and mutual respect between us, so Jhelisa already understood the mournful weight of the track before I asked to feature her. I’m always grateful that she’s willing to experiment with me because it’s not something she does lightly. Jhelisa beautifully channels the essence of whatever emotion needs to come through in the most evocative and visceral way.” The song arrives beautifully packaged with an entrancing video directed by none other than Mark Pellington (along with co-directors Sergio Pinheiro and Sweeten), known for his concert docs for Pearl Jam, INXS, and The Flaming Lips, as well as an extensive music-videography including iconic visuals for Public Enemy, Nine Inch Nails, and plenty more artists. “I wanted the song to sound like a memory, like you’ve entered someone else’s dream space,” The Angel continues, noting how the video perfectly syncs to the song’s mood. “The emotion is contained, very internal, so I juxtaposed a vocal vulnerability against a driving, incessant rhythm, where you can feel the underlying tension at the same time as experiencing the gentle plea, ‘Where’s my shelter…?’” [via Flood]

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A few weeks ago, Ciara gave birth to her son Win. Last night, she shared a video that she evidently recorded while she was very, very pregnant. Ciara’s new song 'Rooted' is a statement of Black pride, a clear statement of solidarity with the protest movement that’s swept across America and the rest of the world these past few months. It’s a hard, kinetic track with vocals from the songwriter Esther Dean. But the song, at least right now, feels more like a vehicle for the video. Like a lot of Ciara videos, the 'Rooted'” clip is built around bodies dancing. In this one, though, one of those bodies belongs to Ciara, who dances with her belly exposed and who looks like she’s about to give birth any second. To watch someone dance this hard while that pregnant is an actual marvel, a near-superhuman feat. The 'Rooted' video is full of Black iconography, and it features the faces of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor. All throughout, Ciara presents an image of motherly strength. Annie Bercy directs. [via Stereogum]

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Hazel English releases the new video for her single ‘Five And Dime’ taken from her debut album Wake UP! which is out now on Marathon Artists. ‘Five and Dime’ is a woozy, idyllic view into Hazel’s world, which is built on timeless-sounding melodies, retro-tinged soundscapes and a knack for resonant lyrics. The mid-tempo number is reminiscent of the playful love songs of ’60s pop, as Hazel frustratedly muses on a love interest who is consuming her thoughts and detracting from her focus, “Gotta get away cause you’re taking up all of my time / You know I need my space so I’m heading to the Five and Dime.” Speaking about the new video, Hazel says: “'Five and Dime' is about longing for escape and freedom so I thought it would be fun to create an idyllic beach vacation, constructed from a set with cardboard cut out waves and fake palm trees. The idea behind it is that while I'm fantasizing about escaping to a tropical place, it's clear I'm just kind of stuck in this pretend version of it. I wanted to evoke the nostalgia of Hollywood musicals from the '50s and '60s, complete with dance choreography and bright colourful costumes.”

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Katy Perry has released her second video for 'Smile,' featuring the pop star playing a video game version of herself as she battles giant spiders, circus trapeze acts and more while dressed as a clown. Much of the video is in CGI, with a live-action Perry playing the video game in her house (while also dressed as a clown). [via Rolling Stone]

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Global superstar, Miley Cyrus has unveiled 'Midnight Sky,' a track that showcases a new direction for the always evolving artist. The song, which was inspired by the past year of her life, is accompanied by a video that Miley self-directed. In creating the song and video, Miley drew from strong female musical icons, like Stevie Nicks, Joan Jett, and Debbie Harry, who have always been so generous, and have been her greatest allies and inspiration. The video showcases Miley as her true self: unapologetic, diverse, sexy, confident, experimental, and strong. The video takes viewers through Miley’s creative vision which displays her complete control of the narrative often told through the mouths of the media. Miley is at peace with who she is and has nothing to prove. As a musician she continues to push boundaries and experiment with her sound and look. Miley has proven to be many things, but boring is not one of them.

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Chelsea Collins is nonconformist pop singer with a vision. For the captivating new 'Water Run Dry,' a collaboration with rapper, singer and fellow Bay Area-native 24kGoldn, Collins's infectious pop melodies glide over a hypnotic beat. Relatable lyrics about a faltering relationship reveal a depth of experience for the 21-year-old, with a wistful chorus lamenting, "there's no good in goodbye." The Roxana Baldovin-directed visuals for the track are an eyeful — Collins and 24kGoldn play house in an oversized, colorful California dollhouse, interspersed with images of a little girl playing with literal Barbies. The message? "I wanted this song and video to execute the world that's inside of my head — somewhat similar to a weird vintage rom com where at first the drama of love is so toxic, passionate and thrilling but eventually my lover and I have a happy ending," Collins tells NYLON. "Unfortunately reality isn't as fun and it kinda feels like some cranky dude is controlling your path, who's lowkey salty whenever something feels too amazing," she continues. "My intuition will tell me to run, but I'm notorious for acting like a Stepford wife, trying to recreate my past feelings yet they're all super robotic. Maybe one day I'll get lucky and love won't have to be so bittersweet, but until then I'll learn to smile even when things blow up in my face." [via NYLON]

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Kali Uchis shared the visuals for her latest single 'Aquí Yo Mando' on Monday. Featuring a verse in Spanglish by Rico Nasty, the single is Kali's first release since her TO FEEL ALIVE EP from earlier this year. The Phillipa Price-directed clip finds the pair on a weapons-filled rampage, dropping bodies in underground parking lots and filming each other along the way. With co-production by reggaeton hitmaker Tainy, the booming track sees Uchis assertively laying some ground rules over trappy 808s. "Haces todo lo que diga (You do everything that I say)," she raps. “Si estás conmigo solo mando yo (If you’re with me, only I call the shots).” [via The FADER]

#videos of the week #jorja smith #slow pulp #soap detox #the angel #jhelisa #ciara #hazel english #katy perry #miley cyrus #chelsea collins #kali uchis #rico nasty

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