#pregnancy is basically body horror to me

[mind-ctrl]

I really wish period tracking apps had a childfree version so it’ll stop saying shit about pregnancy and conceiving.

Like I have been sterilized, tubes removed, pussy is now a graveyard but I don’t like being constantly reminded that society views my body parts as an incubator 🤮

[poobit]

i have many thoughts on how Mouthwashing handles the themes of abuse and the symbolism around it especially as a survivor ... im not gnna hold back so -

first of all i think since its clear the point Jimmy is dismissive of Anya´s personhood and his perception is warped towards what he does as a Captain rather than what he does as a man, it makes sense she doesnt get her own labyrinth or such , i cant argue around that because its realistic he´s so male focused he cant even bother to truly think about what he did to her, i would love it if Wrong Organ decides to do a side story vignette of her own perspective and view in the future if the game proves its successful enough for side content like that.

Assault is something usually not handled with subtlety in games, i think what struck me the most was how real the dialogue of her coping and suicidal ideations and how Curly responded to it felt , the dancing around the subject, the deflection, the "whats next" of the ever impending consequence of pregnancy, how Anya pleads for help from the person she trusts but nonetheless a man unequipped and too emotionally attached to the abuser to be able to confront him, its so real, Curly´s lack of initiative is something Jimmy fully takes advantage of the moment things dont go his way, he turns everyone against him even as a helpless body on a bed because he needed to be in control of the situation, thats what abusers do.

A more sensationalistic game would have easily played Anya´s helplessness and assault for shock for sure, because it would be easy, she is the archetypical victim trope, shes modeled in Wendy Torrance likeness from The Shining, shes meek and unsure of herself and Jimmy shoots her down from the very beginning to make her feel unqualified and cornered, but the furthest the games goes is making Jimmy terror towards the pregnancy and the baby as a boogeyman that crawls and tramples over him. No sights of bleeding legs or her crying or screaming and much less present objectification of her body (which is something that i always think the horror genre has such a struggle not grabbing onto, sexuality is mostly always played up in assault stories especially if the victim is an adult woman), she remains a fully clothed figure and maintains the agency to her own demise, away from Jimmy and beside Curly, which is tragic and obviously still a symptom of horror´s proclivity to back female characters into corners of self inflicted punishment, but the alternative would have been that sooner or later, Jimmy would have killed her.

Its clear to me that the game used Curly´s state as a way to put a barrier between Jimmy and Anya, we dont objectify Anya, but we objectify Curly, Anya doesnt just feel pained and unable to handle Curly´s medication because shes in a sensitive state, her comments about his noises and such draws a line between her trauma and her perception of things as Her fault, she cant handle hearing his struggles and cries trying to swallow a pill because it reminds her of her own helplessness, so she leaves the task to Jimmy, someone who has no qualms in forcing someone down, the emphasis of every treatment as a repetitive process and the sound design is all very poignant and for me, a great way to handle assault as a metaphor, Curly did not consent to being in this position, it is very much still Jimmy´s fault and the fact that Jimmy is basically keeping him alive against his will even to the last moment of the game says everything, Jimmy doesnt love Curly the same way he doesnt love Anya.

The horses are not lost on me, i think horses as animals are often seen as "viril" symbols, strong and often volatile, they can be often hard to mount but when one does the rider and animal are seen as this one all powerful entity, like centaurs, which also carry symbolism of assaulters mind you, so while maybe not intentional on the dev´s part i think it still points to the Horse as a symbol still important in the game, the only spoken audio lines of dialog come from the Pony Express mascot Polle itself, and they are the first to actually confront Jimmy´s self centered line of thought and over-focusing on Curly, if the Tulpar is akin to a beast of a burden then Jimmy beat the dead horse way long ago.

All in this to say that Mouthwashing was a really good experience and i really hope the dev team is interested on expanding a bit more on it because i trust their vision.

[lesbianholyspirit]

My newest take is that Elden Ring is just as much about visceral femininity and motherhood as bloodborne is.

Marika isn’t just Queen Marika the Eternal, she’s also Mother Marika. She leaves an offering to her grandmother.

The shamans that were shoved into jars by the hornsent appear feminine, and while it’s hard to say if they are women due to the horrific mass their bodies have become, they all bear a striking resemblance to Marika herself.

Metyr Mother of Fingers is the best example of visceral motherhood I think, I mean just look at her

She’s a horrifying mass of fingers that spits her children out of a fleshy hole on her front throughout the fight. She’s the first daughter of the greater will and it was her abandonment by her parent that led to everything in the whole world being fucked up basically (at least that’s my understanding after finishing Ymir’s questline).

Edit: now that I think about it, her fight did really remind me of Rom the Vacuous Spider if she was 100% more aggressive and made of fingers.

The body horror inherent to pregnancy and birth is something I wish more things explored because for me personally it’s something that lowkey terrifies me, knowing my body could go through something like that. It’s why bloodborne quickly became my favorite game in the whole series, and why I’ve been loving the elden ring dlc so so much.

I wish I had a better analysis on this, and there is so much more I would talk about, but I just needed to air these thoughts before they drive me insane.

[luvneymar]

okey, take this as a suggestion!!! imagine Neymar fulfilling all the whims of his wife pregnant with twins, need to live that dream :((♡♡

ilyyy ♡:3

PREGNANT PICKLES — NEYMAR JR

— SUMMARY: Neymar fulfills all the whims of his wife pregnant especially your odd food cravings.

PARING: young!neymar x young!reader

It was around 2am and you were tossing and turning in your sleep, being pregnant with twins was sort of a miracle but it was also a nightmare for you; a stomach sleeper.

The first time you realized you couldn’t sleep on your stomach you were heartbroken, but your amazing boyfriend bought you some pregnancy contraption that allowed you to sleep onto your stomach.

You shot up from your sleep feeling pain shoot all over your body, or rather just hot flashes. You sat up adjusting your pregnancy pillows as you stared out the window admiring the Brazilian night sky.

As you caressed your very pregnant belly you begun to feel discomfort; in your stomach as it rumbled loudly alerting you that it needed more food —despite you eating just 3 hours ago.

Contemplating what you should eat you felt your son kick you in your side clearly annoyed that you wouldn’t feed him; how did you know it was your son? Your daughter was pretty mellow only slightly giving you discomfort as she turned over.

But your son? Lord he was a beast. Especially at night when you were trying to get some sleep, kicking, turning, whatever he could do to disturb you. You swung your swollen legs to the side of the bed as you slid down until you could exit the bed.

You walked over to Neymar’s side of the bed standing there hesitant to wake him seeing after his snoring adorable face, Neymar didn’t get much sleep ever since he switched clubs and found out you were pregnant.

You hadn’t realized you looked like some crazy woman straight out of a horror movie till Neymar jolted away after seeing some figure standing over him. “What the fuck— God! Baby are you trying to give me a heart attack?”

Neymar pulled his hand from under the pillow and wrapped it around your waist pulling you into him as you sat on the edge of the bed leaning into Neymar as he rubbed his hand up and down your back. “Is everything alright?”

“Hungry, the babies are hungry. For peanut butter covered pickles & chocolate syrup with whiskey. Oh! And a ghost pepper.” You whispered as you wrapped your arm around your boyfriend playing with his hair, he chuckled hearing your odd cravings.

“Baby you can’t drink whiskey remember?” He reminded you as he helped you off the bed getting up right behind you placing both of his hands on your waist directing you to the door as you both walked towards the kitchen. “Oh yeah, I’ll just drink the chocolate syrup then.”

“I don’t think that’s possible, Meu Amour.” He laughed at your delusions, once you both reached the kitchen he sat you down at the island chair before walking towards the kitchen grabbing all the ingredients.

Once he grabbed all the ingredients you requested he begun to plate them exactly to your specifications as if it was second nature; which really? It was. “Baby?”

“Mmh?” He hummed out as he drizzled the chocolate syrup on the peanut butter covered pickles, he begun breathing through his nose as the smell was to repulsive for his nose, but Neymar loves you so he put up with it anyway.

“Do you wanna try these with me? They’re really good.” You smiled at him as you took a bite out of the diabolical meal you were craving, he turned to you with a bright smile on his face before continuing, “No. No thanks baby.”

“Suit yourself.” You hummed as you took a bite into your ghost pepper biting the whole pepper off, ever since you got pregnant your tastes have changed drastically & you’ve basically lost your sense of spice, sweetness & everything else between the lines.

As you continued to munch on your food you noticed Neymar was staring at you, palm on resting on his cheek with a stupid smile on his face as he stared at you like a lovesick puppy.

“What? Something on my face?” You muttered out chewing on your food as you look up at your husband with a confused Bambi look on your face causing him to chuckle at your cuteness.

“Nothing I just love you.” He muttered as he made his way across the island table to give you a forehead kiss. Hearing his words made you tear up in happiness along with the excess hormones.

Seeing you begin to cry sent Neymar in a panic unsure as what to do despite this happening millions of times, “Baby why are you crying? Is it something I said?” He panicked hovering over you.

“N-No! No it’s just, You’re so nice a-and sweet to me even when I look like a fat pregnant lady! Just ignore me it’ll stop soon.” You sobbed through your sentence pushing Neymar as he tried to wipe your tears.

“How can I ignore my wife when she’s crying?” He replied pulling you in for a hug until your tears stopped, which they didn’t. You just begun to sob harder hearing his sweet words.

“When your wife is drowning in estrogen & hormones because she’s carry two of your children.” You replied finally wiping away your tears.

“And I thank God & you for that everyday.” Neymar kissed you on your forehead once again before sitting beside you on the island taking your hand into his.

“You better, I feel like i’m going to burst every second of the day.” You grumbled biting off another piece of your last pickle covered in mustard.

Neymar lightly laughed at your confession kissing your head as he got up placing your plate into the sink. “I love you, too baby.”

“I never said that.” Swinging your feet that barely touched the floor in the chair, you begun to spin around lightly as not to get dizzy.

“But I know it, and you know it. So you don’t have to say it.” He replied, once he finished washing your plate he made his way back to your side to help you get out of the chair.

Neymar kissed your cheek as he helped you walk back the bedroom, once you reached the bedroom he tucked you into your side of the bed soon joining you.

Once you both were settled he turned on face you giving you a quick kiss on your lips before turning off the night light. “Good?”

“Good.” You smiled at him before pulling the covers over you as you felt Neymar pulled your body into his arm wrapped around your waist.

[master-sass-blast]

Let's (Not) Party, Baby.

Summary: You rub your swollen belly, both fond and exhausted. “I think it just feels weird to me. Like, the gender reveal party was to celebrate the healthy pregnancy lasting so long. But I just feel really weird about being, like, ‘I’m growing a human, come give me shit.’”

Kitty laughs as she unwraps another bar of chocolate. “Well, I think it’s the duty of the community to support pregnant mothers, y’know? It’s about equipping the parents with what they need to care for the baby.”

“Yeah, but everything I’ve read about and seen online is a whole spectacle,” you grumble. “And, honestly, I don’t have the energy for a party. I’m fucking tired. I feel bloated and sore. I don’t want to have a party where I have to put on real pants and eat melted candy bars out of diapers.”

Kitty stills, then slowly looks over at you with a wide-eyed expression of horror. “That’s a thing?”

“It’s a game,” you answer with a roll of your eyes. “You’re supposed to guess which kind of candy it is.”

Pairing(s): Piotr Rasputin x Reader, Kitty Pryde x Illyana Rasputin.

Rating: G.

Word count: 4.3k.

Set after "S'mores for Two."

Author's Note: Me? Posting more than once a year? Surely not.

In other news, my CFS/other body and brain shit is still overwhelming. It basically took dragging myself through editing to be able to post this latest round of fics (for those of you who don't check out my other works, no worries, but I like to post in little caches so that everything is updated mostly together). I'm not trying to vie for pity; I'm really fucking proud of myself for pushing through and being able to post. I had an unofficial goal of wanting to post more fics before April was over (because April is my birth month), and I did it! I am that bitch!

Thank you all for your patience -and all the comments! They really kept me going when the grind of editing was starting to wear me down.

Happy Reading!

“I guess I’m just not sure what to do.”

Kitty nods as she paints your fingernails a pretty shade of shimmering lilac. “Well, I think it just depends on, like, what you and Piotr want to do, y’know?”

The two of you are on the family room couch; you’ve both taken over the space a bit, actually. It’s a scheduled at home spa day, courtesy of Kitty. There’s dozens of bottles of nail polish lined up on the coffee table, next to two discarded face mask wrappers, a tub of coarse sugar scrub, a sleeve of cotton discs, and an entire store's worth of toners and moisturizers. There’s a half-empty pizza box on one end of the table, several bars of chocolate (and more wrappers), an open jar of pickles (the good, Kosher deli kind, according to Kitty), and a cereal bowl half-filled with peanut butter.

You swipe one end of a pickle spear through your bowl of peanut butter, then crunch down. I mean, I know that’s the point, but… “I think it’s more, like,” you begin once you’ve swallowed, “that I never thought I’d be in this position in life. And that if I ever did get to this stage in life–” you gesture vaguely around you with your munched-on pickle spear “–that I’d automatically know what to do.”

Kitty nods, curly hair bobbing with the motion of her head. “I get you.” She finishes your right hand, then screws the lid back onto the corresponding bottle of polish. “It’s, like, hard to wrap your head around.”

“Yeah. I mean–” You pause to load more peanut butter onto your pickle, which is harder than it sounds. “How are you even supposed to plan baby shower stuff?”

It’s a quandary that’s been gnawing on the back of your mind for months now. The gender reveal party, at least, had been easy. Tasty food, balloon with colored confetti inside, Aiden’s photography team because you and Piotr had wanted pictures, done. It’d been a celebration of having a pregnancy last long enough to see the baby’s gender –and a wonderful day where you and Piotr learned you’d be welcoming a daughter in a few months.

Trying to plan a baby shower, however…

You rub your swollen belly, both fond and exhausted. Your eviction date is coming for you, Masha, whether you like it or not. “I think it just feels weird to me. Like, the gender reveal party was to celebrate the healthy pregnancy lasting so long. We all ate food and enjoyed each other’s company. But I just feel really weird about being, like, ‘I’m growing a human, come give me shit.’”

Kitty laughs as she unwraps another bar of chocolate. “Well, I think it’s the duty of the community to support pregnant mothers, y’know? It’s about equipping the parents with what they need to care for the baby.”

“Yeah, but everything I’ve read about and seen online is a whole spectacle,” you grumble. You hold your hand out for a square of chocolate, then pop the piece Kitty gives you into your mouth. “And, honestly,” you continue as you tuck the chocolate into your cheek like a hamster, “I don’t have the energy for a party. I’m fucking tired. I feel bloated and sore. I don’t want to have a party where I have to put on real pants and eat melted candy bars out of diapers.”

Kitty stills, then slowly looks over at you with a wide-eyed expression of horror. “That’s a thing?”

“It’s a game,” you answer with a roll of your eyes. “You’re supposed to guess which kind of candy it is.”

She gags, then shakes her head. “Fuck that. That’s just gross.”

“Exactly!”

Kitty eats a few squares of chocolate, expression contemplative. Once she swallows, she says, “I guess I don’t see it as that big of a deal –not having a baby shower and all that. We don’t have baby showers in Jewish circles.”

“Oh.” Your brows lift upwards. “Why not?”

“It’s considered inauspicious,” she explains. “My best friend’s older sister’s parents kept all the baby stuff at their house until she gave birth. Then, they went over to her and husband’s place and set everything up for when she came home.”

“Oh.” You cock your head to one side, considering, then grimace and shrug. “We already have the nursery part way set up, though–”

“I didn’t mean that, like, that should do the same thing,” Kitty interjects. “I meant it, like, whatever you do should serve you and your happiness.” She offers you a reassuring smile. “There is no real rule about what’s normal or not. If a baby shower sounds exhausting, then don’t do it.”

“But people might be expecting for us to have one,” you sigh wearily, “so they can celebrate.”

“Fuck them and their expectations.” Kitty grins when you laugh. “I’m serious! All that matters is what makes you happy.”

“And Piotr,” you tack on once you catch your breath. “And he might want one.”

“Well, there’s only one way to find that out–” Kitty twists towards the front of the house when the front door swings open, then thumps shut. “Hey, speak of the man!”

Piotr pauses his conversation with Illyana as he looks towards you. He glances at you, eyebrows raised, then at Kitty, then back at you again. “Chto?”

“Your wife has a question for you!” Kitty hollers before flashing a dazzling, enraptured grin at Illyana. “Hi, baby!”

Piotr takes off his shoes, then strolls towards you. “You have question, myshka? Is everything okay?”

“Well, first things first.” You cock your head back so you can look up at him. “Will you give me a kiss, even though I’ve been eating peanut butter on pickles?”

He smirks, then bends down and presses his lips against yours.

“Aaw, what a man,” Kitty croons. She cocks her head back when Illyana approaches the couch. “Will you kiss me, even though I’ve been eating pickles without peanut butter?”

Illyana chuckles, then cups Kitty’s chin with her hand and kisses her girlfriend. She looks up when you and Piotr share a grin, then gently tugs on Kitty’s elbow. “Davay.”

“Help yourself to the pizza!” Kitty tosses over her shoulder as Illyana ushers her towards the front of the house (and away from prying eyes).

Piotr kisses the top of your head, then circles around the couch and sits down next to you. The couch creaks beneath him as he helps himself to a slice of cheese pizza, then again when he leans back and settles in. “Ty v poryadke?”

“Da,” you assure him. “I was just talking to Kitty about baby shower stuff.”

Piotr’s brows draw together as he chews a mouthful of pizza. He swallows, then says, “I thought baby showers were not held in Jewish communities.”

“They aren’t. It was more like…” You gesture vaguely with one hand and sigh. “I don’t know if I want to have a baby shower. I’m so tired, and I feel like a boat, and I don’t want to wear pants.”

Piotr lets out a bellowing laugh mid bite, then quickly claps one hand over his mouth. He finishes chewing between giggles, then swallows and sighs. “Oh, moya serdtse. One day, there will be pants that you like.”

“Doubtful.” You smirk, but it quickly gives way to weariness. “I mean… I just don’t know if I have the energy to deal with a baby shower, y’know? But if you want one, I don’t want to take that away from you.”

“What I want–” Piotr sets his partial pizza slice down on a piece of paper towel, then leans over and draws you into his arms. “I want you to be happy and well.” He kisses the crown of your head, then tucks your head beneath his chin. “Masha will be loved and cared for regardless of having baby shower. If you are tired, then you deserve to rest, myshka.”

“Yeah,” you agree as you bury your face in his burly chest, “but if everyone’s expecting us to have one–”

“‘Everyone’ does not get say,” Piotr interrupts gently. “If they wish to help or give gifts, they know where to find us.”

You sigh, then nuzzle against his shirt when he starts stroking your hair. “Maybe we can have, like, a nice dinner or something? With family and close friends? And some help to finish setting up the nursery?”

Piotr gently rubs your back. “That sounds nice.”

“Cool.” You sigh again, far more relaxed this time, then lean over and grab your jar of pickles. “Want a pickle?”

Piotr hums, then nods and plucks a pickle spear out of the jar. “Spasibo.”

“Konechno,” you say before kissing his cheek.

…

“Thanks again for driving me,” you say as you stretch your seatbelt around your swollen belly. “I’ve just been so tired lately that driving isn’t really a good idea.”

“Konechno, ptitsa,” Alex says as she starts the engine on her truck. “How did your appointment go?”

“Good,” you sigh as you stretch and settle into the passenger seat. “Everything’s looking good. Baby’s healthy. Blood sugar looks good. My iron’s still low, though, so I’m taking a higher dose of supplements and I need to be careful about overtiring myself.”

Alex hums and nods as she navigates out of the clinic parking lot. “What can we help with at home?”

“Uh…” Your face and mind go blank. You try, unsuccessfully, to kickstart your brain, then rub your face with your hands when your mind refuses to cooperate. “I think that’d be a difficult question without factoring in pregnancy brain.”

“Fair enough,” Alex chuckles.

“Man, I thought I was spacey before,” you lament. “And then it was bad enough weaning off my meds, but now–” You stop mid-sentence and gape when you see the sign for a McDonalds. “McFlurry.”

Alex laughs again, then changes lanes and drives into the McDonald’s parking lot.

One order for a large fry and an Oreo McFlurry later, the two of you are back on the road and headed for home.

You hum contentedly as you swirl a few fries in your McFlurry. Before you can indulge, though, your addled brain kicks back into gear. “Oh. Did you have a baby shower when you were pregnant with Mikhail?”

“No.” Alex pauses to turn, then explains, “It’s considered back luck in Russian culture. Most expecting parents won’t have one or purchase things for the baby until they are born.”

“Oh.” You blink a few times –the curse under your breath when McFlurry drips off your fries and onto your shirt. You shove your fries and remaining McFlurry “dip” into your mouth, then wipe down your shirt with a tissue (not that it does much good). Once you’re cleaner, and you’ve swallowed, you ask, “Then why was Piotr so ambivalent about whether we have one or not?”

“Because that boy will follow you to the ends of Earth if you asked,” Alex answers with a smirk. “And he’s Americanized a bit since moving here. Plus, we didn’t necessarily raise our kids to be so superstitious. Nikolai and I saw it as more to not ask about someone’s pregnancy unless they wanted to share, rather than luck related. We still prepared a nursery for Mikhail and stocked up on supplies.” She drums her fingers against the steering wheel while you wait behind another car. “To be honest, even if parties were part of our culture, I wasn’t in any shape for one.” She chuckles ruefully beneath her breath. “I was a wreck during that pregnancy.”

“Honestly, I feel the same way,” you admit with a heavy sigh. “I’m so tired, and sore, and I don’t want to wear pants.” You smile when Alex laughs, then continue with your griping. “Plus, all of the shit I’ve seen for baby showers just… doesn’t appeal? I don’t have the energy to decorate, and apparently there’s games you can play? But it’s weird stuff like melting candy bars in diapers, then having everyone try and guess what kind of candy it is–”

Alex grimaces. “That sounds disgusting.”

“Yeah. Plus, if I’m getting candy, I just want to eat the candy.”

“Understandable and wise.”

“We talked about having family and friends over for dinner,” you continue after grinning, “and to have some help around the house and finishing the nursery… but, like, how do you ask people ‘hey, come bring some food and hang out and help us with the nursery and house stuff because we’re expecting a baby?’”

Alex smirks and shoots you a sidelong glance. “That seemed pretty coherent to me.”

“That’s not what I–” You stick your tongue out at her when she laughs. “You know what I mean.”

“I do,” she assures you. She brakes for a red light, then looks over and puts one hand on your shoulder. “Just ask, ptitsa. Ask, and we’ll be there.”

You smile, and place your hand over hers. “Thanks, Alex.”

…

“I was thinking of actually printing invitations? I don’t know why, I just think it’d be funny.” You spit toothpaste foam into the sink, then resume brushing your teeth. “We could print an extra one to keep. It’d be, like, a cute memory thing.”

Piotr smiles at you in the bathroom mirror, amused. “We could. What would these hypothetical invitations say?”

“I dunno.” You rinse your mouth and toothbrush, then stick your toothbrush in the little holder you keep on the sink. “‘We’re having a baby; come eat food about it.’ Whatever works, honestly.” When he chuckles, you turn to face him. “Do you have a better idea?”

Piotr laughs, shakes his head, then bends and kisses the top of your head. “I trust your creative vision, myshka.”

“Damn straight.” You smirk, self-satisfied, then turn back to the sink and resume your bedtime routine. Floss, fluoride, wash face… what kind of food are you supposed to serve at a baby shower? “What kind of food would we have?”

“Uh…” Piotr clears his throat. “I am not sure,” he calls from the bedroom. “Perhaps we should discuss in morning. Take night to sleep on ideas.”

Your reflection scrunches its face as you floss. “I don’t think it’s that serious. It’s just, like, a potluck dinner. Almost anything would work.”

There’s a pause, and then your husband’s heavy footsteps approach the bathroom. He leans around the doorway and meets your gaze in the mirror, lips pursed. “Da. However…” He tucks his tongue inside his cheek and looks away. “Your nighttime cravings are… ravenous. And unpredictable.”

“I am not that bad!” You blow a raspberry at him over your shoulder, then toss your used flosser in the trash. “Fine. We’ll talk about food in the morning.” You reach for the bottle of fluoride –then gasp and scamper to the bathroom door. “We should have pancakes for breakfast!”

Piotr laughs and nods as he turns down the bed. “Pancakes for breakfast, very good.”

“With blueberries!”

“With blueberries.”

Pleased, you smile, then head back to the sink. Once you’re done with your routine, you head to bed and heft yourself onto the mattress.

Piotr, the saint he is, helps arrange pillows behind you to support your back. He leans over to watch as you scroll through YouTube. “Ah, nighttime listenings.” He holds out one hand. “Would you like me to find Among Us gameplay for you?”

“I can do it,” you insist, frowning. “I’m pregnant, not missing my hands.”

“Nyet, nyet,” he agrees. “But–”

“‘History of Americana Diner Food.’” You gasp when you see a thumbnail displaying burgers, fries, and a milkshake. Your stomach growls, and you groan. “Oh, burgers sound so good.”

Piotr bites the inside of his lower lip when you gaze up at him pleadingly. He hesitates, then sighs and relents with a soft laugh. “Davay, myshka. Let’s get you burger.”

You coo happily, then leverage yourself out of bed. “Just for that, I’ll share my fries with you.”

…

“I meant to ask you something earlier.”

Piotr glances over as you rummage through your take-out bag, then turns his attention back to the road. “Chto?”

“Why –that smells so fucking good.” You stop to cram a few fries in your mouth, then continue once you’ve swallowed. “Why aren’t you bothered by baby shower stuff?”

There’s a long silence. Then, with quiet bewilderment, Piotr says, “I think I am not understanding your meaning.”

“I mean… Your mom said that baby showers are inauspicious in Russia. But, when I asked you if we had to do one, you seemed ambivalent about it all.”

“I do not believe much in luck,” Piotr says after a moment, shrugging. “Some things are beyond control, da, but choices are what impact outcomes. Not unseen forces.” He pauses to change lanes, then adds, “And I want to be sensitive to you. You had bad upbringing. If there was something you wanted in preparation for our baby, for healing, then I want to make sure that happens.”

“Not everything comes down to my shitty childhood,” you press. “I’m not the only person in this relationship, and this isn’t just my baby we’re expecting.” You wolf down a few more fries. “I don’t want you to set aside what you’re comfortable with just because I had fuckheads for parents. This is all supposed to be about compromise.”

“I am not making myself uncomfortable, dorogoy,” Piotr assures you, tone gentle. He takes one hand off the wheel and takes hold of yours. “I think baby showers as tradition –as mandatory–is foolish. But if you want one to celebrate our baby, that would make me very happy. And if you just want to rest, that makes me happy, also. Khorosho?”

“Alright.” You squeeze his hand lovingly, then reach into your bag and retrieve a few fries. “Open up.”

Piotr chuckles, then opens his mouth and lets you feed him fries. “Spasibo.”

…

The two of you settle on printing one commemorative flier, just for the two of you, then email your prospective guests. The promise is for a breakfast-style buffet of sorts; the two of you will provide the blinis, kasha, and some beef bacon (so Kitty can partake), and everyone else has been asked to bring their favorite breakfast dish.

You bust out laughing when Wade –with Nate and Russell in tow–shows up with a trunk full of Poptarts. “You would!”

“We are not keeping all of those,” Piotr mutters as he eyes the wall of blue boxes uneasily.

“Says you,” you tease. “I’m eating for two! These should last us… oh, about a week.”

Ellie and Yukio supply doughnuts and muffins, Neena comes with a box of freshly made breakfast burritos, and Alex, Nikolai, and Mikhail bring a veritable feast of traditional toppings for the blinis and set up to make fresh latkes.

Kitty and Illyana arrive last.

You blink rapidly when you see the numerous bags and containers carried between the two young women. “You didn’t have to–”

“You’re the one who said to bring breakfast foods!” Kitty interrupts with a cheery grin.

You eye the gallon plastic bowl in her hands with mild suspicion. “What kind of breakfast is that?”

“Okay, this–” she gestures with the bowl as she bustles into the kitchen “–isn’t breakfast, but my mom heard that you’re pregnant, and she wanted to send along some food to help you guys out. This–” she lifts the bowl again “–is cholent, and ���Yana’s got some roast chicken and challah from mom, for you guys, too. Do you have room in your fridge? Anyway,” she continues as Piotr starts rearranging the fridge contents to make room for everything, “we brought good bagels and toppings for them, because you can’t have breakfast without bagels.” She turns, finally catches sight of all the food in the kitchen, and her jaw drops. “Oh shit.”

“If you leave hungry, is own fault,” Nikolai announces while grating potatoes.

“Hey, that’s my kind of party!” Kitty says with a laugh. “Let me get my skillet and shit set up, and then I’ll start helping you, Nick. Where should I drop everything?”

“We have counter space for you over there,” Piotr says, pointing towards the back of the kitchen. “And vegan pancake mix.”

“There’s dairy free breakfast burritos for you in the paper bag!” Neena calls out. “And the guy doesn’t use pork for any of his recipes.”

“And the pork gelatin free toaster pastries!” Russell adds.

“The doughnuts back there are parve, too,” Ellie pipes up.

Kitty beams. “Thank you so much. You guys are awesome!”

You smile, and pause for a moment to take it all in.

It’s been an inexorably long journey. As far as you’ve come from your past, there are times where you still can’t believe you’ve made it here –somewhere good, and healthy, and safe. It almost feels like a dream. Or a magical trance. Or like you’re watching a movie, and you’re waiting for the credits to start rolling and for the house lights to turn on.

But it’s real. You’re in a beautiful home, with a wonderful husband, surrounded by people who love, respect, and care about you and each other. And you have a baby on the way, on top of it all.

“Myshka?” Piotr places a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“I’m okay,” you assure him quietly as you wipe tears away from your eyes. “Just very happy.”

Piotr smiles softly, then bends down and kisses your forehead. “I love you very much, moya serdtse.”

“I love you, too.” You tug him down by the collar until you can kiss his cheek, then pat his chest when he straightens back up. “Alright, let’s get this show on the road.”

“Uh, only if you’re sitting down.” Kitty blocks you when you try to enter the kitchen. “Pretty sure you’re supposed to be resting? Doctor’s orders and all that?”

You purse your lips. “You guys are guests–”

“And we’re here to help.” Neena gently takes you by the shoulders and ushers you towards the couch. “So, let us help.”

“Resting is good, myshka,” Piotr starts when you protest.

“Aren’t we here to help both of you?” Ellie pipes up, voice flat but eyes glinting with unmistakable mischief.

“Yeah, but who’s gonna muscle Colossus out of the kitchen?” Russell stage whispers in reply.

All heads turn towards Alex.

Piotr’s confident expression quickly slips away as his mother looks him dead in the eye. “Mama…”

“Are you going to sit?” she asks in Russian.

“Bozhe ty moi –I am not pregnant,” Piotr insists. “I can help.”

Alex sighs, then rounds the kitchen island. “Alright.”

“Nyet, nyet, I am not, mama don’t –blyat!”

You laugh along with everyone else when Alex scoops Piotr up bridal-style.

She carries him over to the couch, then sets him down with surprising gentleness. “Be good,” she admonishes lovingly in Russian. She kisses Piotr’s forehead, then glances meaningfully at you. “Rub your wife’s shoulders.”

Piotr chuckles, somewhat exasperated, and rolls his eyes as his mother strides back to the kitchen. “I am grown man, you know.”

“Da,” Alex agrees without turning back. “You are heavy like one.”

You giggle when Piotr rolls his eyes again, then reach over and grab his hand. You fix him with your prettiest, most pleading eyes when he looks at you. “You don’t want to sit with me?”

“I always want to sit with you,” Piotr assures you, relenting immediately. He moves closer to you, then puts one arm around your shoulders. “Would you like me to rub your back?”

“Oh, always.” You lean against your husband, then relax as he starts rubbing your sore back with his thumbs. You groan, eyes sliding shut, and bask –in him, in the warmth of your home, in the happy chatter and delicious aromas wafting from the kitchen.

Your life certainly feels full of magic.

...

Epilogue:

“Insert Leg A into Slot G–”

“That doesn’t fucking tell me which shitbag it is!” Wade snaps. He snatches the instructions out of your hands, scans the page, then growls and hurls the paper against the floor. “You’re a goddamn rocking chair! No one fucking asked you to run the elementary school accelerated program!”

“Definitely comes with the same baggage,” Neena mutters.

Wade looks over his shoulder at her, then back at you. “Remind me why she’s being the peanut gallery again, instead of using her internal magic eight ball to help us?”

Neena rolls her eyes. “For the last time, that’s not how my powers work.”

“Not to mention they’re probably already maxed to keep you from throwing the materials through the window,” you mumble under your breath.

Things would’ve been simpler if you’d just purchased a pre-assembled rocking chair. Unfortunately, not many of them come rated from someone of Piotr’s size (or the wear and tear you’re both certain that your baby –and, eventually, kids–will put the seat through).

“I keep telling you guys, you’re going about this all wrong!” Kitty calls as she carries the vacuum cleaner down the hall.

“Yes, do enlighten us, Ms. ‘Quantumania Axed the Best Character,’” Wade grumbles.

Kitty stares at him for a long moment, face scrunched up in conclusion. “...Right.”

“KURT WAS A GEM, AND WE ALL KNOW IT!”

“Look, you guys just need to let Alex and Ellie do this,” Kitty presses on as she gestures to the mess of wooden slats and rocking chair pieces on the ground. “It’s butch magic. They’ll sort it out in, like, ten minutes.”

“I already told you, Katherine,” Ellie hollers from down the stairs, “I can’t assemble a fucking chair!”

“Fine, Ellen!” Kitty shouts back. “Then just let Alex do it! Honestly, you have a hyper-competent badass in the house, and you don’t stick her on IKEA assembly? The fuck is wrong with you all!”

“Let’s keep things moving, please.” Alex’s voice and footsteps echo up the stairwell. “And reasonably calm,” she adds with a knowing look at Kitty. There’s a pause until Kitty nods and heads off, and then Alex appears in the nursery doorway. “What am I doing now?”

“How good are you at assembling rocking chairs?” Neena asks.

Alex chuckles, then plucks the instructions off the floor. “I’ll give it a go.”

[kennycatchabreak]

the pregnancy story line has been useless in my opinion and just a reason to make a woman suffer

fatima thought she couldn’t have kids, so you give her a fake pregnancy?

like even if fromville as an entity is doing this for shits and giggles, it’s lazy writing…

if you wanted to get into body horror, the pregnancy wasn’t needed cuz you can lose teeth and eat rotten shit from high levels of stress

or since this is a supernatural place, she could have contracted the worms, entering a parasitic relationship where they’re eating her from the inside, controlling her to feed on rotting flesh/food simultaneously

is this all we have to offer women in horror/sci-fi? the fear of unhealthy pregnancy and not being believed? like what makes this more innovative than what already happens irl?

like atp have fatima turn into one of those mole faced bitches and have her and ellis navigate their love story. ellis has to keep his wedding vows to fatima despite her transformation and she’s slowly slipping away —no longer craving to eat but craving to kill for satisfaction, devoid of humanity. now ellis is tasked with reminding her why she loves him and the townspeople

hell this could set up a theory that the moles become evil cuz they no longer have loved ones fighting for them so they literally become hollow, bile filled creatures that used to be HUMAN

cuz there’s those scenes of smiley touching things and turning the steering wheel, then jasmine looking in the mirror almost somber to the fact that she kills for pleasure. like they were once people, what the fuck happened?

with creature fatima, she could go in the underground tunnels and we spend time learning about this mole community and who they serve (the entity on the colony house radio/liu house phone)

<><><>

also the whole “why doesn’t anyone believe me?” thing is tired now. we already did that with boyd but a writer obviously is tired of it too cuz marielle comments on that

we are in a supernatural town. anything coming out of someone’s mouth is finna be believe to me atp ( i swear to god by the time we get to randall’s cicadas, victor’s jasper and elgin’s ghost, i better not see another person question them)

the first time with sara was like “okay, strange. i can see why ppl don’t believe her really cuz so far this hasn’t happened.”

then boyd’s worm arm is like “leering on medical racism. the man needs help.”

now tabby and fatima is “no one believes women, especially woc”

let’s move away from this if you’re not going really tackle it. lets get to actually solving what’s going on with this freak ass town

what does jasper know?

who is kimono lady?

what’s up with bottle tree?

what’s up with the cellars?

what’s up with effigy cabin and the three red rocks?

where the fuck is the motel?

who is communicating to jim from the radio and phones?

who’s dead body is in elgin’s cellar?

who are the ankoohey kids?

what did julie, randall, and mari see?

why randall got cicadas?

<><><>

like lets wrap fatima up by next episode, deadass

she’s not pregnant so what is she? answer it now, so we can move tf on

or atp put her ass in the box for killing tillie along with acosta and let’s see if they take fatima cuz she’s special? or maybe fatima rips out the box herself?

also crazy how tabby is the only women moving the story forward meaningfully and not just having stuff happen to her and she react to it. she actively making decisions

i honestly advocate that fatima run and go find out what tf is wrong with her by herself. give her the reigns

<><><>

if i’m being honest this feels like a boyd redemption arc. fatima is going to go crazy and he’s going to have to save her because he couldn’t save abby for ellis

or ellis is either going to take boyd’s place in this situation and get a chance to save fatima, resulting in ellis feeling like he can’t put his full faith in his father to save everyone. so, he basically begins undermining boyd cuz if he can save fatima how come boyd couldn’t save abby?

or ellis is going to have to kill fatima, re-traumatizing both boyd and ellis, but especially boyd because he has to watch his son make the same decision he did

<><><>

but essentially fatima becomes a pawn to teach men a lesson while she suffers for no reason

tian chen’s murder already fulfilled that arc of “i can’t save anyone” because fromville via the creatures committing torture in front of him

and i’m not saying boyd should not have any lingering feelings about how he failed tian chen, but he shouldn’t be re-learning this lesson because kenny already gave him that reassurance of “there was nothing you could do cuz you’re human”

i hope this show doesn’t become boyd goes on the same journey to come to the same conclusion each time

and i hope they don’t keep using women to fulfill that

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

kenjaku is genuinely so creepy and i think that’s one of the reason why i love him SOOO much !! ive always had a liking towards characters who are insanely messed up and grotesque and kenny is like the perfect example of that. hes gross like — actually. i think hes a good example of how genuinely fucked up jjk is, and as much as people hate him i think he’s such an amazing character. gege’s dark writing when it comes to him and sukuna is so IWHSHSBSHEWJW !! sukuna being a cannibal and his entire thing revolving around cooking is so cool to me. like his entire character circles around things like that. he can use fire which.. cooking! when you cook you can eat! sukuna eats ppl.. his malevolent shrine is just a bunch of slashes which cut you to death and when you cook you’re usually cutting and chopping things.. with kenjaku and the whole pregnancy thing as well.. the womb.. it’s like disturbing and honestly it makes ppl a little sick but i find it so interesting because that kind of writing i LOVELOVEEE SMM!! kenjaku was willing to do the most nasty things just to get his plan to work. he’s such a scum of the earth guy sigh.. that’s why im so SOO happy i found this blog because you also like kenjaku and i can safely talk about my love for him without getting jumped 💔 im really sorry this is so long!! im just really happy it’s a safe spot to talk about these things! i love horror :3

i love kenny 🐑

THIS THIS THIS THIS . GOD. THIS.

i literally love you so much lambnon you worded this perfectly….. i loveeeee horror elements in fiction and i agree that jjk does it so so SO well!!!! sukuna & kenjaku are such great examples because not only are they morally reprehensible in really disgusting ways, they also … feel literally no shame over it. they never try to justify it . morality doesn’t even exist to them, and i think villains like that are sooo fun <33

sukuna’s cannibalism and general thematic ties to food & eating is SO tasty especially since it all goes back to him eating his twin in the womb … it’s like eating is a curse that follows him around but he’s made it into a point of pride. you know? he’s so unabashedly awful and i loveeee that about him…..

AND KENJAKU. i agree on all points!!!! everything!!!!!! he’s soooooo creepy and so eerie and so gross. i find it really funny and fitting that even sukuna thinks of kenjaku as a freak LMAO. which is . extra interesting when you remember that the womb is a special place even to sukuna… and kenny sort of… perverts it. he makes it into his own science lab. it’s so twisted and sickening and tasty because kenjaku doesn’t just impregnate that woman from the kamo clan, he impregnates himself!!!! and i can only imagine that he did it partially just out of worldly curiosity which is….. sooo . him? he’s so insane? 😭

literally nothing is off limits to kenjaku, and that makes him such a fun villain….

^ i think he says it best himself :3c

the womb motif in general is also so . Good… the motherism of it all….. i’m forever bitter that we never got to see his domain in action because the fact that it’s basically a manifestation of a womb realm is soooooo fucking sick oh my god. body horror is so scary to me but also so insanely tasty and the fact that kenjaku’s whole character revolves around it just!!! scratches my brain. no pun intended.

anyway …. this ask made me a little insane. i’m so happy to have you here lambnon!!!! :’3 this blog will always be a safe space for lovers of the grotesque / of kenjaku in general <333 our beloved scum!!!

[theblackcatspeaks]

A Youji Sakiyama analysis

A living hell in your own body.

CW: Pregnacy, rape, male pregnancy, abuse, violence, etc. Basically, a whole NitroChiral+ game.

Please be aware that this analysis will contain spoilers from the route of Makoto and the game itself.

So, here it is.

Basically, I've been meaning to write this analysis for a while now. I waited until I finished the route of Makoto, but I'll continue on making these analysis while I do the rest.

I can admit that I wasn't not expecting to connect to Youji that much, but I surprised myself. I connected to him quite A LOT, something that hasn't occurred when referring to masculine leaning characters.

From the beginning we can see that he's the protagonist of the story, suffering from an illness that makes him weak. Having to lose time out of school due of it, Youji doesn't really seem to care about his surroundings. There's an anxiety that keeps him still, between the looks of his classmates and his daily routine.

Of course there's not a direct mention of the figure of Mary, if you're someone who has been in a catholic environment; you can tell that the feminine concept is what makes the game so important. Youji, as we soon discover through the playthrough, he is a Mesu. A parasite lives inside his body and makes him suffer symptoms of pregnancy and PMS.

From the beginning of the game we learn that there's a lot of biblical references, later we find out that the cult that exists in the Sweet Pool universe worships Sodom. For those that are not familiarized with Biblical Mythos, Sodom was the city of sinners and sodomy. God punished the citizens for their sins. The cult worships the city.

Now, going back to the virgin Mary figure. Who's Mary? Mary was the Mother of Jesus and the most important female figure for Catholics, second is Mary Magdalene.

Right in the beginning of the game we can see that in the shoe racks, there's an statue of the Virgin Mary holding a baby, her son, Jesus. Mary was impregnated by the Holy Spirit, without a sin. Her body is pure and an example of what an ideal wife and mother should be, faithful to her faith.

Youji is the opposite.

When Youji gets his first "period", I couldn't help but feel sadness. It reminded me when I first had mine when I turned 11 years old, coming back to school and suddenly feeling hot blood between legs; realizing with horror that I was able to get pregnant. Youji doesn't understand what is happening with his body and t his terrifies him.

In that very moment, Youji turned into an object of desire to others. Makoto, who was his only friend at school started to get attracted to him due the pheromones he is emanating. Zenya too, realizing that he is also one of his kind, since Zenya's family is part of the cult that I mentioned later.

Zenya couldn't become an Osu, a High Class male, with the Sodom parasyte, ending up severely traumatized and wanting to prove himself and his family that he can become one. In his ending, he ends up abusing Youji and violently does do so.

There's no happiness for Youji in his routes, but I'll mainly speak about his ending in Makoto's. Youji ends up cannibalized and raped by his best friend. If you are a someone with fem traits or appearance, you'll get definitely targeted by people who desire to touch you, or in the worst cases, to abuse you.

What I am explaining in this analysis, if you have female traits, you'll become an object of desire. If you bleed, you become something to produce. Youji turns into a whore and a virgin if you know about the Madonna complex.

As someone who deals with PCOS, having periods turned into a nightmare. Back in summer of 2022, I remember bleeding for almost two months, never knowing when it was going to end. I felt like there was a hell inside of me and that's why I connected so deeply to Youji and the parasite inside of him.

I think I'll write more of Youji later, but if there's something I can say about Sweet Pool that makes it different than DMMD, (I love both, truly, I had a very deep obsession with it back in 2014-2015), is that Sweet Pool connects to the female monstrosity.

Bleeding is something feminine and a monstrosity. Hence why is there so many horror movies that depicts motherhood and the female body like an Alien for example. I wouldn't say Youji accepts the parasite, but he ends up talking to them in a way.

Nobody was there for Youji but the statue of Mary in his school, observing how his body turned into the object of adoration and hate. Like hers.

[romchat]

Director Deep Dive: The “Feminine Gaze” of Zeng Qingjie (A Familiar Stranger, Butterflied Lover)

What does it mean to film something through a “feminine gaze”? 

Unsurprisingly, this is a tough question to answer. In filmmaking, the feminine gaze is usually offered as an alternative to the “male gaze” or the ways movies and tv depict women as passive sex objects. Although filmmakers and scholars disagree over the definition and even value of the term, I like to think that, in its most basic form, the feminine gaze is visual storytelling that subverts or redefines how gender looks on screen.

I think one director whose visual storytelling often taps into that feminine gaze is Zeng Qingjie so I thought it would be interesting to discuss some of the stylistic choices that make his work unique.

I first came across Zeng’s work via the short dramas A Familiar Stranger and Butterflied Lover.

What struck me about these two fantasy romances is how different they feel despite having relatively standard plots for their genre. Both dramas are dreamy and refreshingly sensual and intimate. They touch on taboo topics like menstruation, abortion, and the dangers of pregnancy while also quietly challenging traditional gender roles. But most interesting to me is how they center their women protagonists not just in the plot but in the way the camera captures their image. These are women stories and it's evident down to the cinematography.

Style Element: Subjectivity

For instance, Zeng's visual storytelling often uses subjectivity.

Subjective cinematography is when we the viewers see what a character sees or feel what a character feels because of the camera’s position, movement, lenses, etc. It’s considered a critical feature of the feminine gaze because it forces us to recognize the thoughts and feelings of women characters who are often overlooked in traditional media.

Zeng adopts several cinematography techniques to put the audience in the mind of his women protagonists, and together these techniques encourage us to empathize with them, especially in their darkest moments.

One of my favorite examples of this is an early scene of Butterflied Lover.

In the drama, Tang Qianyue, the FL, has been infected by a poison that turns people into monsters known as "butterfly slaves". Qianyue knows she has been infected but to appear normal in front of her loved ones secretly suppresses her monster form. One day, however, she begins turning into a butterfly slave against her will.

As seen above, the scene of her transformation consists of many long shots that showcase the full horror of her monster form.

But the scene ends with a close-up of her face, the camera lingering on the anguish she feels at her body betraying her. Look at how the camera keeps her face in focus but her claws blur with the background, her blood-red eyes hidden in shadow. Zeng wants us to understand how she feels in this moment, not what danger she presents. She might be a monster but we feel pity for her rather than hate or disgust because of the humanizing subjectivity of the camera language.

(Side Note: I don't think it's an accident that most of the infected people shown in their butterfly slave form are women given that monsters in media often symbolize the unknown or uncontrollable elements of the feminine experience. It makes me wonder about the role of female monsters in Chinese myth and whether there are parallels to their patriarchal meaning in Ancient Greek mythology.)

I think another good example of this humanizing camera language is in the sexual assault scene of A Familiar Stranger.

Unlike many shows that depict sexual assault in an erotic way (i.e., filmed to make us sexually excited about a woman’s powerlessness and nakedness), Zeng uses a combination of close-ups, shallow depth of field, and canted angles to make us feel the violation. With the intimate but disorienting effect of these camera techniques, we feel Shi Qi's duress but also clearly see her attacker's abuse of power. We feel what she feels and therefore have a better understanding of what it's like being a woman trying to navigate the world. It’s an awful moment but one that doesn't objectify or visually disempower her as a character.

Style Element: Sexuality and Feminine Desire

(Side Note: Woot woot pregnancy sex)

Zeng also challenges the ways women's bodies are typically objectified on screen by how he portrays his characters' sexuality. In his dramas, women aren't sex objects but instead subjects who experience sexual desire and express their sensuality.

I love the intro of A Familiar Stranger for this very reason.

The show opens with the camera languidly panning across a line of bare legs and scantily clad bodies, their owners posed seductively. It’s a stereotypical example of the male gaze reducing women to their bodies.

But then Zeng's subverts this male gaze when he has one of the women look right into the camera in a subtle fourth wall break.

According to filmmaker-critic Joey Soloway, such moments are an example of "returning the gaze" and are a way for women characters to articulate how they feel about being seen as objects:

"When a female character breaks the fourth wall, they acknowledge the reality that they are being watched and are refusing to remain passive in that. Instead of being gazed upon, they remind us of their agency by directly addressing us and giving us insight into what they’re thinking and what emotions their actions are being motivated by." (Mariel Cipriaso)

Through this technique, we learn that the seductive performance is not for the benefit of some man on screen (or in the audience) but instead themselves. These women, who also happen to be sex workers, are posing for a portrait as a cheeky way to celebrate their own beauty and sensuality divorced from the services they provide male clients (with some sapphic undertones to boot!).

They are in control of the camera not the other way around. 

Ultimately, these are stories where women find pleasure, and the intimacy scenes reflect that.

Everything is softly lit and impressionistically shot as if the characters are lost in the haze of their mutual desire. The use of close-up and extreme close-up shots further play with our senses, giving us the tactile feeling of skin on skin, breath against breath. Unlike stories filmed through the male gaze, Zeng’s camera doesn’t reduce his women characters to body parts and mere receptacles of male desire—they’re active participants who desire and enjoy their partners just as much.

And what I find particularly interesting is that the scenes don’t just “center” these women’s POV but instead show how sex (and touch more broadly) is a vehicle for emotional intimacy and the impact of that intimacy on their male partners. (That hand flex below is giving Mr. Darcy.) Sex and physical intimacy between men and women is transformative not exploitative.

In these two dramas, women aren't objects of desire that men use for their own pleasure but instead subjects who are seen as such by the other characters* and, most importantly, Zeng Qingjie's camera.

(*Side Note: See @well-dressedwords' excellent analysis about the ML in A Familiar Stranger. His intuitive trust towards the FL is an example of seeing her as a subject. He doesn't recognize her for superficial reasons like beauty but her character, which he was able to glean when they first meet and she saves him--hence the title A Familiar Stranger.)

[maisonaime]

Ilithyia's Blessings

I got Covid-19 as a college graduation/early Christmas present :) enjoy the fruits of me being stuck in my parent's basement.

Summary: Rewrite of Feyre's reaction to finding out about the risks of her pregnancy! I (like many) hated how this was dealt with, and would personally love to see her rip the entire IC a new one for that bullshit. Diverges from canon the moment Nesta leaves the townhouse. Heavy angst and hurt for all, BUT a happy ending! Please note that I am atrocious at writing dialogue so forgive me.

Warnings: Pregnancy complications, family dysfunction, mentions of past trauma, emotionally abusive & generally unhinged behavior from all!

Part 1:

As the last of Nesta’s burning fury trailed out of the door after her, Feyre’s eyes once again met Amren’s. The tears there had turned sharp as glass shards. Power imbued with the abundance of life nestled in the High Lady choked the air of the townhouse, damp and salty and so very wrong. They had been so very wrong. 

Amren did not falter, but her stance was one of false ease. She had never wished so badly to be well-versed in the nuances of emoting and made a note to herself to observe her peers' reactions more closely; that she might glean some useful mimicry for a similar situation in the future. A creature of preternatural stillnesses and pregnant silences, Amren waited until Feyre spoke in a voice so deep it may have been derived from the pits of the Mountains themselves. 

“How long have you all known?” 

“You should really ask your ma–” bared teeth cut her off.

“I asked you Amren. How long?” Feyre snarled.

It was becoming uncomfortable to breathe, reminiscent of the cloistered air of the Prison. Amren was struck with the sudden realization that her powers were no match for her High Lady, not anymore.  

“Too long” she admitted unflinchingly. “I will apologize for my part in it, but Rhysand had his reasons and I saw the practicality of it. As your friend, I know it was wrong. You must understand Feyre, I have to be the one person who can separate emotion from decisions in this Court, it’s my first nature and my duty as Rhys’ second.”

Feyre just stood there, eyes wide, breathing hard. Her tattooed hands still clutching her stomach as though the babe would rip its way into the world for all the horror she felt in that moment.

“Has it ever once occurred to you…” – her voice burned through the condensed ether like the birth of a star, Amren winced – “has it ever once occurred to any of you, that when Rhys made me High Lady, he made me High Lady of this Court, not just his High Lady. I am High Lady of the Night Court, I am your damn High Lady. And if you Amren are his second, then you are also mine.”

Tiny ancient one be damned, she needed backup for this. She only prayed Varian had the good sense to bring Elain back to the townhouse, no one else would do any good for this moment. 

And to think I was lecturing Nesta on respect.” she seethed. “To think that I’ve put up with this ridiculous sequestering of my family by my family. Elain and Nesta are flailing as they grapple with bodies and lives they were born and bred to fear, just as I did. We treat Elain like a vapid flower as if she is not burdened to see between fucking worlds. And you all act as though Nesta’s viciousness will tear chunks out of me but you forget she is my sister. I have known her my whole life and she has not torn my throat out yet. Vicious she may be, but at least she’s godsdamn honest.”

“No one is denying this Feyre but I don’t see–” 

“What this has to do with me? With my child? There’s plenty you lot are failing to fucking grapple with right now. The very basic premises of duty and friendship to start with. What about the principle of allowing a female control over her own life, her own body?” there was a jagged edge of panic making its way into her tone, the air grew impossibly tighter. 

At that moment the door banged open once again and Amren winced again as Morrigan pushed her way into the room against the wave of unyielding magic pulsing from Feyre. She silently cursed Varian.

“Feyre, I’m so sorry. If we had thought there was any other way to keep you and the babe safe–” she began before she was cut off by a dark wave of Feyre’s magic. Not the same magic that silenced Tamlin’s voice at the meeting of the High Lords, but a plume of magic that quite literally took the place of the air in Mor’s lungs, bringing her swiftly, silently to her knees.

“Surely you aren’t going to tell me you knew what was best for my womb Morrigan, you couldn’t even protect your own from desecration.” Feyre spat down at her.

Amren stood frozen in horror, watching Mor claw at her neck, eyes bulging and mouth agape like a fish out of water. The spell lasted only moments before air rushed back into her purpling face with a harsh gasp, but both Fae were still frozen in place before their High Lady. 

“You all seem to have forgotten, that I live and breathe the powers of all the Courts of Prythian. That I am Made, my sisters and I. We are creatures to be feared and served before we are loved. You’ve failed me, and in doing so you’ve failed this Court. Make sure you let Rhysand see me say that when he looks into your mind.”

Mor blanched, “Feyre you can’t leave now, Rhys and Madja are so close to finding an answer.” Where the hell was Rhys, how had he not yet sensed the chaos threatening to level the entire block of buildings the townhouse occupied?

“I can and I will. I am not safe here, nor is my child. I will seek refuge where I can find healers and friends who will allow me the dignity of deciding what I do with my body, my child. That I would put my life in the hands of a healer who answers to my mate over me, a husband who seeks to deceive me and involve my entire family in doing so? No, I would be a fool to give away my life so passively.” she paced before them frantically, power collecting into thick bands that coiled around Feyre in a churning, horrid shield. 

No longer their friend, no longer their family. A mother and a female burning with primal rage and fear for the safety of her child, guaranteed only by her ability to protect it. Protect it from the world, and in these agonized moments, protect it from her family. A family that could no longer be trusted.

“He will rip apart the world to find you and the babe Feyre, this won’t do any good.” Amren spoke as bluntly as usual, but the edge in her tone betrayed her wariness. 

“Let him try. I’ve never had the chance to test my powers against him, have never needed to until now. I confess I’m curious to see if I can inspire the fear in him that he’s attributed to my name.” The crazed glint in Feyre’s watery eyes was wholly unnerving. 

“Feyre, I’m begging you, don’t do this. We all lived with the fear of losing each other during the war– you and Rhys actually did. Don’t let this tear us all apart again.” Mor was practically weeping, still draped at Feyre’s feet in submission.

“Mor, it’s not my decisions that have led us here. I’ll leave it to you all to decide how to proceed; this Court seems to conceive of its most coordinated efforts without my knowledge.” Feyre had stopped pacing and closed her eyes, all of that asphyxiating power rushing from the room back into those bands of black power coalescing around her. The hair on the back of Amren’s neck stood tall.

“Will you return girl?” she asked quietly, refusing to look away from the fierce specter of power they had so woefully forsaken. Accepting that there was little they could do to stop the events that had been set in motion.

Feyre’s head snapped to her, eyes black with rage, looking every bit the Made Fae that could undo curses and courts. 

“I will return when I have proven to you all that I can give birth to my son without your duplicitous interference. I will return when I have a Court and friends and a mate that I trust to bend the knee, not bring me to my own.” she said with finality. 

The vortex of power around Feyre crackled and snapped as Rhys’ careful warding of Feyre’s body collapsed under her iron will. A new source of power, alarmed and frenetic and reeking of Rhys, swept through Velaris and into the townhouse. It crashed into the whorls of Feyre’s might with a piercing screech. The windows shattered sending glass through the air. Amren and Mor curled into themselves to avoid the spray.

When the chimes of falling glass had stopped and Mor and Amren could uncover their eyes, Feyre was gone. Where her scent, her power, her body had overwhelmed the room, there was absolutely nothing left to indicate that the High Lady of Night had ever stepped foot in the townhouse. 

Somewhere in the distance, mountains rumbled, birds took flight and the citizens of Velaris cowered as Rhysand let out an unearthly roar. 

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

The ask about reader asking their yandere if he’d love them if they were a worm is hilarious. Especially Acheron, since he literally gives the correct answer!

So that made me start thinking about his and reader’s story again…It’d be interesting to see a continuation of the story with reader changing over time

Initially tries to run away from Acheron, and takes advantage of the new “body hopping” skill since she’s now a parasite. Eventually she starts to embrace her new ability of body hopping, and likes to “play pretend” with Acheron taking over peoples’ lives. (It’s basically playing dress-up to her, by choosing a “new character,” new lifestyle, etc.)

It’d definitely be fun to see Acheron’s reactions to reader. After all, they’re in love, together forever!

And one more thought I had given the potential children issue/solution between Acheron and reader…Acheron easily extracts, freezes, and preserves reader’s original eggs. Overtime, Acheron finds a distant relative whose looks and intelligence are strikingly similar to his original body. A near exact copy. You know the drill…Acheron inhabits the distant relative’s body, and is then able to IVF reader’s eggs with his new body’s sperm. Reader goes through pregnancy, and now the children are successfully genetically reader’s and Acheron’s. Not children belonging genetically to the original owners of the random bodies they inhabit. Perhaps I’m overthinking this, but I think this’d ensure to Acheron and reader that their children will inherit their traits, and be more receptive to the whole parasite transformation thing once the children reach adulthood

It’s also so cute to think of Acheron nursing back reader in her parasite form if any accidents occur. Instead of just putting her in a jar, he has a little luxurious dollhouse for her to relax in. I don’t know how I can spin this body horror story into a fluffy cute thing. Something must be wrong with my brain. And sorry for this long post!

Thanks!!! 💝

Oh he will definitely have fun chasing you around. Hopping bodies one after another, always finding you as some sort of weird hivemind connection to him, the prime parasite. But, if you were willing and is actually just enjoying body hopping, he would also take part in the role plays both of you will get on to.

But of course, it was short lived. Both of you can't let the cops in on your case now. That would be a tragedy.

About the pregnancy. He will be opposed to the notion of hunting down a family member. Sure, it's YOUR eggs, but it's not his sperm. It's still another guy's sperm fertilizing yours and all hell will break loose if that will happen. Weirdly enough, he will be okay fathering a kid not born out of your original egg and sperm, but not your original, and his descendant's spunk. Definitely not.

A solution for this, is probably, in his first, original life, he stashed some of his dna, and that included his sperm. When he burnt his house down, he grabbed his original DNA samples also and ran off. Maybe for some experiment in the future? It would be a coincidence though that he met you, want to have a kid with you, remembering he still have his sperm, reinvigorated it to life, and birthed your child.

And the doll house is cute. He will find it childish for sure, but if you like it that way, who is he to judge?

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

Funny pinned post time bc it felt more convenient ⬇⬇

Hi I'm Mick aprofessionalwithoutstandards (or Maria, or Mickey), I'm twenty, bisexual, bigender transmasculine she/him, Latino, weird in the head, all that good. I might talk kinda strangely or not respond at all sometimes, so bear with me, it's all on me n not you. I'm almost always not trying to start shit. I really do love talking to people so always feel free to talk :)

This is my tf2 blog and has always been only a tf2 blog, sometimes I post Portal stuff too

I make posts. I failed to start an original post tag so most original posts are just tagged #tf2

This is not a primarily NSFW blog but I do reblog porn and have genuine, non-jokey conversations about sex and kink from time to time (the latter is much more common than the former). All of that is tagged under "#mick dicks", so block that tag if you don't want to see any of that sort of content

"#open mick night" is a wreck of a tag but technically it's for anything more personal or anecdotal. Sometimes it means "not tf2" but more often it means "gameplay anecdote"

"#mick fics" is my fic tag. I think my art tag is just "#my art" but I don't draw for tf2 a lot </3 "#oc tag" is for my ocs

I tag for slurs (reclaimed or otherwise), excessive gore, body horror, drugs, and mentions of pregnancy more explicit than the baboon uterus. If you want something else to be tagged, feel free to ask me, but full transparency I will not tag for blood, light gore, or guns. They're kind of unavoidable

I like Sniper, I main Sniper, I even, as the kids say, kin Sniper. This isn't like a roleplay blog or anything, referring to me as him and him as me is just done bc it goes to my head

Not like a dedicated ship blog but I do post a lot of ship stuff. Primarily swordvan, bushmed, demomedic, and funny adminsniper, but you'll basically see everything here from time to time. I try to keep it all tagged for your convenience

The only thing I ask is that you don't send me stuff abt sniperscout/speedingbullet, it's not like a "dni" you can interact if you post that idc but it's a big personal preference and I'd like to have that respected, tysm Oh also no scoutpauling asks tysm

I don't really have a dni but I am just going to ask people to be normal. I'm just some guy and people who send me asks and stuff are also just some guys, respect me and respect other people. I know there can feel like a disconnect but I do see everything people say in my notes and I'm generally trying to cultivate a nice positive setting for everyone lmao. When I complain abt stuff don't take it too seriously lol, we're all just here to have fun

Figured I should stick this on here somewhere: I've never watched Emesis Blue, I don't know what Freak Fortress is, I have never played Team Fortress Classic and I do not care, and I have little to no interest in "fem fortress"posting (I do not consider the trans/nonbinary headcanons I have for some characters to be "fem fortress"). Nothing against any of these things, I just don't really care about them and won't be able to answer questions about them

Main is @biracy (so I reply and send asks from here), ao3 is biracy, Steam acc is Grampus Gaming

[doublydaring]

can you explain the michael psychosomatic kittens curse to me please it's been bothering me for upwards of a week

it would be an honor. it's kind of a long story but luckily I'm at work.

1. I was drawing pictures of Mike and Peter on zoom with my bestest friend Cal and I was drawing their beautiful 70s long hair as I am wont to do. A thought occurred in my head that the color of their hairs together would make a beautiful tortoiseshell cat. This prompted me to say aloud: "They would have beautiful kittens." Which of course raised questions. I wasn't even really thinking about kitten pregnancy at this point I was just thinking about their hair. But kitten pregnancy sprung forth none the less.

2. The household has been on kind of a Phyllis kick lately because I have a 73 slide long PowerPoint on the Monkees that I have been workshopping into a sort of combination stand up comedy/performance art piece. Our second focus group (the cast of rocky horror) said that they liked it but wanted more interpersonal drama. So I added Peter and Davy's fight and a "wife timeline" so we've been thinking about Monkee wives and I recently read Mike's book and Phyllis I think we can all agree is one of the most interesting and under-examined people in the whole Monkee cluster fuck.

3. So Mike is pregnant with Kittens. Because he and Peter would have beautiful kittens. And we all agree that being pregnant would be a good thing for Mike Nesmith. On a physical level it would suit him but also from a sort of pseudo feminist perspective where he is forced to take on the burden of """"womanhood"""" we feel it could help to facilitate understanding to what he's putting these women through.

4. So it becomes sort of body horror, where he is forced to confront the physical and emotional labor that he has been foisting on Phyllis and then neglecting her but in becoming pregnant he understands her and their relationship blossoms. We decide that Phyllis sort of has a mental break and convinces herself that she's going to trick Mike into thinking he's pregnant so that he understands just for a moment what she's going through. We try to come up with ways you could try to convince a man he is pregnant (this is difficult).

5. We realize we have lost the kitten plot. But Riley (who has been here the whole time because we share a room but I didn't want to introduce to many characters into this) has been taking a class on monsters and the monstrous and there is this medieval medical belief called "the maternal imagination" which is basically the idea that if you are pregnant and get scared by a mouse your baby will be born mouselike. Or if you are looking at a picture of a man who is not your husband while you conceive a baby the baby will look like the man in the picture, not it's actual father. It's a very interesting sort of belief.

6. So we decide that Mike stumbles upon a sick kitten one day and brings it home and is positively doting. Phyllis and his real life children remain secondary. He's about work and this fucking kitten. And so of course it becomes the object of Phyllis’s ire. And she hates that right? Because it's a sick and tiny kitten. And really she should hate Mike (but she cannot hate Mike this is a fundamental truth of her character). But she decides that she can make him understand. By making him think he's pregnant. And she goes to bed that night and has a dream that she gives birth to kittens.

7. Of course this is totally delusional he's never going to think he's pregnant but weirdly, he starts to ... act pregnant? In ways that she would have absolutely no control over. He's got that glow and he's gaining weight and most of all he's happy and is spending a lot more time at home hanging around. And she starts to get all doting excited husband on him. And their relationship is a lot more tenable now that their roles have subtly shifted. Because she is the responsible one right? But previously she'd have to defer to him and he had to perform this masculine patriarch role and neither of them are brave enough to challenge it but they both feel wrong fulfilling those roles. This is just right. But it's also very fucking wrong. Because Mike is pregnant??? And it's getting pretty undeniable. It is also clear that whatever is in there is not a baby. Phyllis has had babies and this is four little squirmy things. And so eventually Mike has kittens and it is not clarified how physically this happens but it does and it fixes him.

Sorry. I know this is pretty much batshit insane but it is the story.

[useless-pvppy]

Hewooo this will be da official intro post to my lil blog here so hav fun reading and getting to know me woof! ૮⍝• ᴥ •⍝ა

Introduction💛:

Name: Pup! or Puppy! or mutt! or whatever you wanna call me woof! ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა

Pronouns: He/It only!!!!! no they/them!! no fem pronouns!!!

Age: 20+ ! yey!

Sexuality: uhhhm this one's a weird one, definitely aro, sexuality wise i dunno rly!! as long as u can fuck me, w a strap or w ur own thing then im down! woof! probably leaning more towards mlm tho but once again, whatever works!

Bottom only! maybeeee switch but Im still figuring that one out so for now sub only too ૮u ﻌ u ა

Pre-t sadge but we keep barking wauf

also im a furry but i suck and havent made a fursona yet but whatev!!! still a furry wauf wauf

Stuffs I like ૮₍ ´ ꒳ `₎ა♡ (to be updated? I forget many things all da time sowy):

petplay/puppyplay ofc, collars/leashes, being tied up, somno, cnc, dubcon, knives, marking, tentacles, piss, hypno, breeding, age gaps, age play, corruption, edging, basically full control over me i like that yeppers, degrading, humiliation, praise, plushie humping!, being cut And cutting others!!! if im obsessed w u i wanna cut u up all cute!!!, gags, overstim, size diff.., cockwarming.., stalking! monsterfucking:>, fauxcest + theres pwobably more i forgor, feel free to ask me!!

Stuffs I don't like ૮ – ﻌ–ა :

foodplay is big yucky for me, degrading if its directed at my body is big no am insecure TwT, scat yucky, any form of forced fem or detrans/misgendering thing is a no.. if i wanna wear a skirt and be cute i will but dont call me girly names!!!!!, pregnancy yucky...

uhmm honestly theres not many things I wouldnt at least try once so yeah once again be normal and ask if ya arent sure!!!!! ill more than likely answer nodders :3

DNI: general dni yakno the drill, sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, zionist, maga dumb fucks gtfo!!, under 18/ageless blogs pls leave! (as long as u state youre over 18 somewhere its okie, no need to be specific just pls dont be a child!!!!!), antis, ppl who cant differentiate fiction/fantasy from reality! hetero men!sorry but am not a girl so i dont want u interacting if u view me as one!!!

thats about it for dni! if you dont like smth on my blog feel free to leave wauf! if you think im morally bad bcoz of da stuffs i like thats ur opinion but i dont care so dont tell me! just leave ^-^

wauf im super-duper bad at introductions so am not even rly sure what else to add >~< iguessss general just stuffs about me? i like video games altho most of da games i like i never played coz ive never had a laptop or pc for them, am still just using my roomie's stuff TwT, i draw sometimes which is very epic very cool wauf! also i bark a lot in text and type weirdge sorry!!! alsoalso i luv horror stuffs and scary stuff!!! horror games r superduper my favourite but i do scare easily but that doesnt matter!!! i also like cute stuff like sanrio stuffs and plushies and cute clothes and sharkies!!!! ya ya! I call myself emo so thats what i am i guess!!

also for rulez and stuff on what u can send as asks!!!! well i dunno! whatever ya want! be horny or just talk to me about whatever wauf!! beware if u make me flustered and horny enough times i might become obsessed w u and I'll wanna stalk u and cut u so !!! beware of weirdo puppy here!!

alsoalso im pretty shy at first, and uh in general honestly, and pretty bad at this whole human interaction stuff (im a puppy !!! how would i kno how to talk to you humans >~<) if we arent mutuals u cant dm me sowy!

I wont giv you my discord or any other social media right away!! im too paranoid and shy for that sorta stuff so i gotta proper trust u! or u gotta catch me be real desperate but we will see iguess! also wont send u nudes! i never even taken any so no chance youd get one!

my shyness also comes from da fact im very inexperienced in everything ever so like...yeah...cbfnhfdnbfndbg IDK!!!! WHATEVR!!! IM BAD AT TALKIN ABOUT THIS STUFF!!! WHATEVR!!! teach me mayb 👉👈

alsoalso im!..okay i cry Very easily if i start getting embarrassed i start tearing up and the more u tease me about it the more I'll cry.. i can't help it and i can't control it i jus cry rly easily (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠)

very veryvery autistically obsessed w my soulmate!!! coz yes i do hav one!!! this blog is for funsies and to be horny w other horny folks but at da end of da day most of my brain and thoughts r occupied by one person only wauf!! once again am aro and shes aro too so what we hav is special!!! more than romantic nd more than platonic iss secret third thing which is primal obsession w one another!!! theyre my owner and i am theirz das how it workz!!! I feel like i should mention dis jus in case anyone tries for anythin long term over here! sorry not gonn happen! wauf💛 ehhmmvnv probably shouldve mentioned dis sooner but am bad at realisin non aro folk might try for things nd also wasn sure how she'd feel about it nd i kept forgettin to ask but whatev now u know!! will be usin #catto posts for posts that remind me of him or posts i make about her wauf!

Okie thats all!!! i think!! im tryna figure out how im gonna tag stuff so for now #pupper rambles for my text posts, #pupper pics for pics of me :3c, #pupper answers for answered asks!

Send asks!! talk to me pwease!!! giv me attention!! woof!!

-Pup ♡ ૮₍˶Ó﹏Ò ˶₎ა

[plethomacademia]

CW related to my loss, gonna jump but this is just kind of haunting me

In my state, the people who do ultrasounds cannot tell you the results, they basically cannot show any emotion about what they are seeing. Every other time I had an ultrasound for like my thyroid or my heart, the techs did their jobs without much talking. This time, she never stopped. I keep thinking about how my tech chatted away about her recent wisdom teeth extraction while taking pictures of a dead baby. Just an astounding ability to perform and hide what she knew would be terrible news. Moving the wand, following the protocol, documenting this long dead baby so that this woman and her partner can be told bad news later in the day, long after they have left her table.

There is so much body horror and weirdness that goes on with pregnancy that I am going to mine for ages but this, there's no angle on this that I do not find fascinating and horrifying.

[the1975attheirverybest]

cannot stop thinking about baby's first snowman!!

picture a chunky ass baby with curly hair (rip her mum who had the worst pregnancy heartburn because matty's hair genes refused to be suppressed) all bundled up in her puffy northface coat (but of course) and a beanie that's just a bit big for her so it keeps falling in her eyes and matty or missus has to keep pushing it back. and it's been snowing in england with the snow actually settling, proper white december so they decide to let her make a snowman.

of course she demands he have a carrot nose and that he's called olaf (idk if matty's impressed or thinks his child is basic) anyway because she's the sweetest child ever she wraps her scarf around it at the end i think because "he might get cold otherwise" 🥹

STOP THATS SO CUTEEEE. DO YOU HEAR THAT, VEE? THATS THE SOUND OF MY HEART BURSTING WITH CUTENESS.

I think Matty’s laughing and taking pictures of the beanie slipping over her eyes and the missus is like scolding him for laughing at his own child’s expense and like cuffing the beanie so it sits nicely on her head. Which of course only lasts for about 5 seconds. She peeks over Matty’s shoulder to see that all the pictures and videos that he’s taking show a tiny child swallowed up by the puffer jacket and the beanie and scarf, all that’s visible is her slightly pink cheeks and her giant goofy smile (which she gets from her dad).

At first little girl is concerned because the ground underneath her feet has gone “crunchy.” Like it makes noise when she steps over it with her teeny tiny snow boots. So she freezes in place and starts crying. It takes a bit of convincing and repeatedly telling her that it’s like Anna and Elsa for her to decide to accept that she’s safe.

Matty, of course, thinks that she would enjoy herself a lot more if she knew the endless fun that is to be had with snow. So he shows her how to make snowballs using Mommy as “target practice.”

But matty has no idea he’s created a monster. She, is, her father’s daughter after all. He goes to pick her up and she smashed a snowball right into his face. It hurts, like, a lot, as anyone who’s been hit in the face with a snowball undoubtedly knows (me). But he’s not about to make her feel bad so he just keeps a straight face and smiles at her.

She insists she’s tall enough to build the snowman but even though its bottom half is getting to be bigger than her. Matty lets her think shes contributing significantly to the snowman but in reality, half the snow is falling out of her tiny little palm before it even reaches the body of the snowman. Without mom and dad, Olaf would be a dream. But she’s so proud of herself and giggling and constantly repeating “it’s a snowman!” so they indulge her.

When it’s all done, they ask her if she wants to take a picture next to it. “What shall we call him? What’s his name?”

She instantly says “Olaf”

Matty goes to say something, but his wife knows him well enough to stop him. “Let her. She’s a child.”

“An unoriginal child?”

“No. Just a child.”

“Fine, okay, he’s Olaf today, but we’re getting her more winter themed kid films. Being a child is no excuse for being basic.” (Spoiler alert: she’s one of those incredibly picky kids. Much to Matty’s horror, she refuses to try out other snowmen but will insist on replaying “let it go” like sixteen million times all winter.)

They set up the camera, go to stand next to Olaf, and that’s when she gives him her scarf.

Matty’s like “you’re so sweet” and she says she didn’t want him to be cold. We’re all wearing stuff and he’s not. Right then and there, he starts sobbing. The missus begs him to cut it out and stop scaring his daughter but he just says she’s already got good big sister instincts and we should just give her a sibling.