#possibly schizophrenic

[the-daughter-of-lilith]

There’s no way I could ever be involved in any sort of “social movement” since coming to terms with the fact that I’m autistic. (Possibly even schizophrenic…)

You want me to be a “cryptic” messenger? You want me to decipher cryptic messages? You want me to lead a group in some situation? You want me to be “apart” of a group?

No thanks. It’s physically impossible for my brain to comprehend anything that’s not directly in front of me or speaking to me in a direct, transparent manner. I may be good at pattern recognition and attentiveness to sounds, but I’ve still gotten into lots of trouble due to being incapable of comprehending neurotypical language.

The sad reality is that I’m not the only neurodivergent person that’s mentally incapable of being apart of any social movements in today’s world. I’m lucky enough to even be able to hold down a job, have a partner, and live on my own to be honest…

Nothing lasts forever!

[yippee-boi09]

I made sum art (and yes, @damagedcoda6669 , I'm sick in the head as well)

...ooooooga boooogaaaa... mentaaal illneeeeessss... oooooooohhh... (I'm working to get a proper diagnosis by my doctor btw so idk yet)

[donttellourtherapist]

Fun fact. The “episode” we had last year could have just been the beginning of the prodomal phase of the psychosis and this is now the active phase.:) /neg

If we actually have schizophrenia I will literally cry and be inconsolable the last thing we need is another chronic genuinely life altering and disabling disorder.. I mean if that is the case at least we will be able to get treated but we will literally be on antipsychotics FOR THE REST OF OUR LIFE and ik that’s not different from realizing we will be in on our antidepressant/anti anxiety med for the rest of our life but that- our anxiety and depression have been with us our whole life. Something like schizophrenia would be so much change in so little time it’s so scary to think about.

[cyanidist]

Currently hallucinating “Blank Space” by Taylor Swift on repeat… not cool dudes

[starryeyesstarryskies]

my friend will not respond for like two minutes and my brain will be like "welp. either he hates us forever or he has been murdered. we will never see him again." like logically i know there's like a 0.1% chance of that being true but i just can't shake it.

[ceask]

My cat always scratches at doors at random times in the night. Usually around 2, 4, and 6am. That's because this little bitch doesn't have a regular sleeping pattern and takes power naps, and gets a little concerned when she wakes up at night and everyone else is just. Not there??? We're not walking around, we're not talking, we're in our rooms alone and we're sleeping??? My cat cannot comprehend it.

And you know who else takes power naps instead of sleeping at night? You know who I snatched that headcanon from? (Pretty sure it was Dark)

Dust.

Dust literally saves everyone from Killer's cats scratching at doors and waking them up in the middle of the night. His sleeping patterns coincidentally matched up with the cats. So when a cat is wandering around, it would usually just scratch into Dust's room and calm down. Bonus if Dust and Killer actually share a room, and when they go to sleep all the cats are with Killer and when they wake up they're all with Dust. (Upsets Killer to no end.)

Okay, from here cw/tw? for schizophrenia and a semi-detailed hallucination episode

With my headcanon that Dust has schizophrenia, this would be an absolute nightmare for him.

A symptom of schizophrenia is hearing voices and sounds that aren't there. His main hallucination would be Phantom, and I've read that the voices schizophrenic people hear are usually far away. Like they are literally in the walls/srs.

Now imagine Dust hallucinating Phantom, while also hearing cats scratch at his door. Do you know how badly it would fuck with him. He would hear a voice from the wall, and assume that someone is trying to crawl into his room and scratch open the walls. So he just sits on his bed and hyperventilates. Bonus if the episode would involve physical hallucinations, with hands roaming on his face, head, shoulders, neck. And then with the sound of the scratching his brain would automatically make him feel nails scraping at his arms and legs.

[boydyke]

little schizophrenic thing you don't rlly think about unless you Are schizophrenic / otherwise psychotic. when I hear people but don't immediately see them (or the source of the sound) I sorta stand awkwardly for a moment looking around, just because it's a mere possibility that it wasn't real. (it's usually real in my case, but yknow) I'm not sure how others interpret it when they see me though

[archtheghost]

Well, it also could be DID or just schizophrenia, the latter would explain a Lot that happens in the bible

Christianity is a hive mind

[ididntorderthesoup]

Unhinged take: I'm tired of pretending I'm just paranoid or delusional. I am being followed by parasitic beings that are part flesh part spirit. They have many disguises and can hide very well. I've seen them for years and I've tried hard to both warn people and hide from them.

There I said it.

"It's not rational" "what evidence do you have outside of your own direct experience?" "What are the chances you're right vs it's your schizoaffective "

I don't care I don't care I don't care

It's real to me.

[vamp-luvr999]

Off topic post, but I’m needing some moots rn. Or just someone to talk to who already isn’t a friend, I’d like some friends on the Schizospec!!

[yippee-boi09]

POV: Your realize the friend who abandoned you turned out to (POSSIBLY) be your fp for the past 5 years and because you (POSSIBLY) have bpd you've lost who you are to this person entirely

(TW: Eyestrain, derealization, SH, disassociation, mental health)

+ One without eyestrain

[theygender]

This has been on my mind for weeks and I talked to my therapist about it today and told my girlfriend about it too so now it's time for me to update the gay people in my phone: I may have schizotypal personality disorder

[luckyshouse]

as a kid my favorite game to play with my grandparents was "zoo" where my grandma would make a pillow fort around me and then go do things around the house, and id pretend to be a zoo animal who broke out of their cage and go and find her. i always wonder if my parents or grandparents ever make up weird spiritual stories of how like, it was destined i was always going to lash out and break free or something.

[irena-dubrovnaa]

as much as i do agree that western christians are sometimes harmful in the way they teach their faith i am farrr less likely to listen to any sort of religious "deconstruction" if it's coming from a white antitheist

[tanadrin]

hey, while you're answering SR asks---one thing that I wasn't clear on after reading through the tag. SR has a really _deep_ history of human civilization, tens of thousands of years or more, right? and it's definitely explicit that a lot of cultures have lost technology over time, or explicitly stopped "progressing" technologically (that one plateau culture), which is why it's bounced around basically the same tech level that whole time (with anachrotech pockets). But I'm not clear on _why_ that is.

Is it 1. that you're implying that this is actually likely to happen to any civilization on long timescales, and modern Earth monotonic progress is temporary, 2. that it's caused somehow by the semisymbiotic native SR life (some of the stories seem to imply periodic catastrophes driven by its influence? are those frequent & big enough to hold tech progress back overall?) 3. SR society Just Does That because of some combination of resource factors and social structures 4. something else?

Your intuitions are correct--there is indeed a reason for it! It's mostly the second thing.

But there have actually been two great technological stagnations in the history of humanity, and the longer and bigger one was before they arrived on Sogant Raha.

In order for the setting to work (mostly-terraformed alien planet), humans had to have some means of resurrecting species from genetic samples or records, but my intention was always that the beginning of the Exile is very much a near-future, or possibly alternate-present event: humans were forced to spread out among the stars by a catastrophe that made Earth at least temporarily uninhabitable, and they did so, at least initially, with crude Project Orion-type spacecraft, because that's all they had available. This universe doesn't have FTL travel, and Earthlike worlds are comparatively rare, so even when they settled in other solar systems, they did so in pressure domes and grew their food hydroponically.

This created a situation not incomparable to the Paleolithic phase of human history on Earth: extremely slow population growth, very little spare productive capacity, little room for experimentation or innovation. For the exiles who eventually arrived at Sogant Raha aboard the Ammas Echor, this era lasted about four hundred thousand years. The people of the Ammas Echor would have been more technologically advanced than the first exiles who left Earth, but not fantastically so. They simply did not have the resource budget for it. Nowadays, we can afford to invest in experimentation and in r&d that may not pan out; in an environment when even a small hit to your energy budget means people are going to die, you stick with the techniques you know for a fact work, and if you innovate, you do so slowly.

Once the Ammas Echor reached Sogant Raha, simply the fact they could walk around in an oxygen-rich atmosphere that was a comfortable temperature and grow food in any patch of open ground that got good sunlight would have been a phenomenal luxury. They certainly had the technology to grow quickly, and to rapidly innovate again. And they did aim to do that, at first (despite, y'know, centuries of hidebound traditionalism that come from hidebound traditionalism being the difference between survival and extinction of your whole lineage). But catastrophe soon struck in the form of a virulent disease that seemed to be caused by native alien microorganisms.

There were other catastrophes after, and some were human-caused (devastating wars, or environmental collapses like the Burning Spring). But many were not; many can indeed be traced back to the tahar, the genus of acytic symbiont that makes its home in the tissues and cells of endobiota and xenobiota alike. These have probably been equal to, or significantly worse than, many of the purely "human-caused" disasters. But the dividing line isn't always so clear; if an apparently random mutation in the tahar's signalling mechanism is, as a side effect, causing heightened aggression across a whole continent for a hundred years, then the wars that result might well be a human disaster, but in a purely causal sense they're not solely humanity's fault.

I think left to their own devices--if they had found a world without the tahar--the people of the Ammas Echor would have rapidly built up an industrial base and flourished. Indeed, they had a rather fantastical idea at one point to try to build a beacon to signal to other exiles that Paradise had been found. Alas, the planet had other plans.

[transfemgorgug]

saw a tiktok about a schizophrenic man committing a violent hate crime and a lot of the comments were fearmongering about schizophrenic people in general, not the specific situation. and it just got me thinking about how schizophrenia is treated in media and the news, how you only hear about schizophrenic people when they’ve committed a violent crime, how society says these people need to be locked up in mental institutions for their own good, and like. i feel like people don’t understand that bodily autonomy applies to everybody. yes, even truly awful people. and truly awful people who happen to be mentally ill are not awful because of their mental illness, the two are totally unrelated. obviously, someone who’s committing violent hate crimes should not be allowed to continue to do those crimes. but just because a person poses a threat, the way to neutralize that threat is not involuntary commitment. because when you start to shove the “bad” crazy people in mental institutions against their will, that opens the gates for all mentally ill people to be institutionalized.