#points at ned

[meet-the-net]

"Purely for highly professional and coworker-y reasons. Team bonding and whatnot... Shh."

Have you ever wanted the chance to draw ur oc pulling a gun on Brodie while giving Brady a kiss on the cheek? Or ur sona giving them both a pat on the head? Or maybe you'd wanna draw a random clown hitting them in the face with a pie? No? Well too bad! Now's your chance anyways! Feel free to draw whatever you'd like fitting between here. They're being paid to stand there so make em work for it!

Merry Smissmass! And don't forget- give em a vote in the @tf2occontest on Dec 29th! Single versions under the cut!

[ladystoneboobs]

so, one aspect of catelyn which i think is underrated (certainly the biggest adaptation loss which nobody talks about) is her, let's say superstitiousness, or better yet, let's call it genre-savviness, being one of the few adult characters open to magic and the supernatural in this fantasy world. we first meet her in the godswood, home of gods which are not truly hers, yet she is still very aware of their power. when she and ned talk of the deserter he killed, he hopes he won't have to go with the nw to deal with mance rayder, but she has even more fear of that idea bc there are worse things beyond the wall than just wildlings. ned scoffs and says she's been listening to old nan too much, but she's right. we already know from the prologue that she's right! and here she is, understanding the genre of their world better than her husband, who was actually born and spent his earliest years in this northern land of deep magic, listening to old nan's stories. same with the direwolves, where she was uncomfortable with them at first, but later believed in them as guardians from the old gods even after robb had lost his own faith. and once again, we know she's right even if she doesn't know the evidence to back up her instincts, bc summer and shaggydog did not fail bran and rickon and robb was almost certainly a warg like his brothers. (perhaps making it more fitting that she's the one brought back as a fantasy vengeance monster, not ned and robb, the most unbelieving dead starks.) and in her 2nd agot chapter, everyone focuses on her ambition in wanting ned to agree to the hand job (pun intended) and sansa's betrothal, and while she does recognize the value of their daughter being a future queen more than ned does, that's only her stated argument bc she thinks it's rational enough for ned to listen to. (if ambitious matchmaking were as important to her as to her father she never would have made those frey betrothals fandom loves to blame her for.) in her own head there's a deeper urge driving her. she keeps thinking of the dead direwolf with antlers in its throat, an omen which filled her with dread from the first she heard of it, before robert's arrival, and thinking of it again is what makes her desperate to convince ned not to refuse robert. she had to make him see. and really, she's not wrong, as jon snow would say. the dead direwolf was an omen of ned and robert getting each other killed. it's just one of those misread portents, with no way of knowing the danger to ned was in his loyalty to robert, not conflict with him. BUT the next time she's dealing with baratheons, she knows exactly what she's talking about. it's catelyn, not brienne, who sees the shadow slaying renly, and explains that it was stannis who did that through some dark magic. with no way of knowing how it was achieved and no prior expectation that such a thing were ever possible, she realizes with no hestitation that stannis was guilty and that his red witch was capable of pulling this off somehow. really, the only instinct of the supernatural she's wholly wrong about is her insistence that varys gathered his knowledge through some dark enchantment. however, though that might offend varys, given his own personal experience with a sorcerer, i'd say it's a reasonable assumption without knowing the dude had children moving through walls everywhere like oversized rodents. and imo it just shows she had a healthy respect and awe for varys's power which most other characters lack.

oh, oh, and let's not forget that she also believed in the curse of harrenhal, from her own childhood and the stories old nan told her kids. "and every house that held Harrenhal since had come to misfortune. Strong it might be, but it was a dark place, and cursed. 'I would not have Robb fight a battle in the shadow of that keep,' Catelyn admitted." sure, that wasn't enough to save robb, but he did not die from the curse of harrenhal. that doom was meant for his enemies from tywin lannister to roose bolton.

[maidensfantasy]

love how fucked up the ned/robert dynamic is. they grew up together and got attached because they both have brothers they aren’t close to and replace with one another despite the jarring similarities (brandon and stannis). ned loving robert despite the atrocities he committed and the ones he refused to condemn, hiding himself in the north so he doesn’t have to be faced with how much of a monster his friend actually is and feeding that lie to his children. robert forcing ned to come south with him and run his kingdom all under the premise they were always meant to rule together (they were full on married for the entirety of agot tbh). robert projecting how much he wanted to be with ned onto lyanna. robert loving ned arguably more than anyone else in his life and despite all that he refuses to respect his boundaries and wishes. their entire agot relationship is held together by nostalgia and like 20 layers of traumabonding that neither would ever work through. ned getting himself killed because he loved robert too much. god what the fuck is wrong with those two.

[holocrone]

PUSHING DAISIES 1.03 › The Fun in Funeral

[atopvisenyashill]

i hate when ned gets dragged into this “second brothers who have a complex” thing esp when it’s a “well ALL the houses have this problem” ned doesn’t actually!!!! ned shows us no jealousy over brandon being heir to winterfell, what ned shows is a very obvious and deep seated discomfort with the fact that his brother was brutally violently murdered and next thing ned knows he has his brother’s job, his brother’s house, and his brother’s wife!!! that feels a little different to me, don’t insult my man here by comparing him to your floppy ass second sons who are mad they’re gonna get the world handed to them but their brother gets slightly more handed to him!!!!

[froggerland]

„Not if it’s you.“

Gaaahhhhh this took way too long and I wish I’d gone with a colder color scheme but here we are

Anyways I’m participating in the Terror Bingo btw!! This is for the prompt „Mental Health Issues“ and I know Collins would’ve been the obvious choice but I’m a „edward little gets seasonal depression as soon as the sun is gone for 3 days (maybe also just regular depression during croziers withdrawal when things start going south, please get him out of there)“ truther

I like the thought of Jopson being ever the Steward and looking after his 1st Lieutenant who hasn’t left the bed in several days

(Btw please ignore Joppers hand I’m really trying to improve on that)

Version without text:

[edorazzi]

Due to scheduling conflicts we're celebrating Tintin Day early this month! 🥳

Someone said in tags that they could totally see Tintin needing International Rescuing at some point. What better way for the Hood to put iR's integrity on the line than revealing all to a world-famous reporter? Would the Tracys jeopardise their whole operation to save just one life?!

(Un)fortunately Tintin hasn't shown up at work since 1929, so the only sacrifice here will be an old man's dignity. Again. 🪦

[greywoe]

"The she-wolf laid into the squires with a tourney sword, scattering them all. The crannogman was bruised and bloodied, so she took him back to her lair to clean his cuts and bind them up with linen."

[lvcashael]

"close"

[erinwantstowrite]

MY BOY NED IS TRANS IN LOF???? 🥹🥹🥹

HE IS!!!!

[danytheconqueror-jonthewhitewolf]

[ilynpilled]

So I was on reddit and I saw someone saying this in response to somebody else saying there would be no character in asoiaf that wouldn't have killed aerys in jaime's place:

"Once the Rossart was dead, there was virtually no threat of wildfire nukes. There was practically no reason to kill him. He wanted to kill him."

And I just..get so frustated bc, let's put it this way: aerys is the king, that alone makes everyone around him be his yes man, add to this that the king is a mad fucker and will kill anyone if he so much as wakes up with a bad mood and you have the unlucky pleasure of passing by him in the morning, everyone around him will be even less inclined to so much as question him. This is a court that just watches as the king kills anyone, even high lords, in unnecessarily cruel ways just bc, as he killed one of his hand's bc he refused to carry out one of his orders or something, even the queen has no protection against the king. These are the ppl surrounding the king. So you're telling me that the city will be safe from going kaboom just bc you, the 17yo hostage guard, killed one of the king's MANY pyromancers and put the king in a cell? No one will see the mad fucker in a cell and get him out? Once out of his cell, the mad fucker totally will not turn and say "hey, this bitch put me, the king, in jail, that's treason, kill him" and they will just not do it? You're telling me the other pyromancers totally did not have a back up plan of "if they didn't hear from Rossart every 2 hours or something push the nuclear button"? No? Everything would be totally fine as long as you kill the ONE errand man but keep alive the man giving the orders everyone feels compelled to obey, be it by duty or fear, that's totally fine right? it'll work out, promise ✊

the thing about redditors is that they cannot read and they also refuse to engage with what this story is actually exploring like a good 90% of the time

[chiropteracupola]

lhqr outfit musings... (underlayers, everyday outfits, performance / out on the town outfits)

[la-pheacienne]

I just LOVE how both in got and hotd we have established that the root of all evil is women who *checks notes* enjoy sex! consistency is important right? I mean GOD FORBID we genuinely root for anyone that isn't nEd FuCKinG sTark the paragon of big dick masculine honor! who are we gonna root for? a flagrant philanderer that started the war because she's a whore? pwease

but at least they're criticizing monarchy you guyzzz hashtag anti war hashtag subversion!! definitely promising!! never been done before!!!

[ladystoneboobs]

no of fence to jon snow fans who for some reason care about his exact age, but these discussions just annoy me no end. not only bc there's no way any weirwood flashbacks bran has to rhaegar/lyanna will come with time/datestamps, but also bc there's always comments like this:

SEVERAL turns of the moon (ie, months)?! have these people never seen a human baby before or just have no concept of their ages? even if we take into account travel time from the toj to wf, meaning jon was not a newborn too fresh out the oven when catelyn and robb arrived, there's still a difference between a newborn and a 3mo and an even bigger difference between those infants and an older baby 5-7mo. there's very good reasons these lines were cut. whatever birthdates can be worked out internally for jon and robb from when they're first mentioned as 15 and 16 don't matter in the end, bc grrm doesn't care about a consistent timeline and the actual text of catelyn's pov and ned's convo with robert about cheating on her should outweigh any guesstimates about jon's official nameday wrt robb's. catelyn may not have cared for jon, but she would sure as hell have noticed his nameday if it came before robb's and made him ned's firstborn. if jon's birthday canonically came before robb's then either ned's cover story would not involve adultery (not impossible for him to sire a bastard before his wedding), or he'd just give jon a new nameday along with his new name to fit the adultery lie. it makes no sense for him to lie about one and not the other, undermining the big lie with a little public clue of his story not adding up. whatever else she was as a stepmother, cat wasn't stupid and a bastard who was actually the eldest son being raised alongside her trueborn heir could be an even bigger insult than whether he was born of adultery or not.

BUT, the unknowability of jon's true birthday is not the only reason this annoys me, it's bc this is all based on the assumption that jon must be older since rhaegar/lyanna ran off together before ned married cat, as if both boys must have been conceived asap as robb canonically was when his parents consummated their marriage. and that's not how human reproduction works! even if you don't understand how fast babies grow in the first year, you should know that people who get pregnant do so through ovulation cycles and a lucky sperm finding an egg and all that, not just immediately getting knocked up as soon as one has p-in-v sex for the first time. not unless you only know mean girls sex ed where if you have sex you will get pregnant and die. (even tho lyanna did die, there's plenty of canon examples where pregnancy did not lead straight to death. also examples of people who did not get pregnant right away and even some who are/were sexually active and childless without always having moon tea on hand.) we can't know how long lyanna was having sex before that sperm+egg match happened or even how long she was with rhaegar before losing her technical virginity. if they were married, doesn't it make sense to think they didn't consummate their relationship until the wedding night either? that's the only leverage there is to ensure a status as wife rather than just mistress.

and while i just said grrm doesn't care about exact timelines and a lot is still foggy surrounding the rebellion and esp rhaegar, there is one timemarker wrt robert's rebellion he voluntarily threw in, time and time again: that stannis was besieged at storm's end for almost a whole year. that siege, which mind you, did not match the duration of the entire war. it only started after robert won his battles at gulltown and summerhall, returned to storm's end, and then went out and lost the battle of ashford, leaving his homeland open to the reachermen. the same siege which only ended when ned made a detour there after the sack of king's landing, before going to the toj. even if lyanna may not have given birth that exact day ned found her, she could only be waiting in that bloody bed for weeks at the most, not months. so if rhaegar knocked her up the very same night he carried her off and jon was still a newborn when ned found her after the siege of storm's end had ended, wouldn't that mean lyanna was pregnant for well over a year? that's not how human pregnancy works either! so, maybe that's proof that jon and robb, whichever order they were actually born in, were actually very close in age as babies, much closer than if they were both conceived asap.

and really, jon's actual birthdate does not matter imho, when he was raised not just as the bastard to robb's trueborn heir, but with robb also known by catelyn and the world as ned's firstborn (which he was, in any case, as jon was ned's nephew by birth). what difference could a birthdate before robb's make (even were there some means of discovery) after ned, cat, and robb are all dead? if one is looking only at his birth parents then he's only a firstborn child on lyanna's side, but definitely a second son on rhaegar's side. maybe he was always meant to be a second son with a not much older half-brother! even if the aegon fka young griff is not in fact rhaegar's son, he'll still be known as aegon vi targaryen, meaning jon will never be known as any father's elder son. if i may reference mean girls again, it's not going to happen.

[atopvisenyashill]

i was thinking more about characters Performing Gender, but not necessarily Transgressing Gender. I wound up focusing on Ned and Sansa bc I feel like I understand them the most but-

Sansa as a hostage is imo the most obvious (bc it’s so well done) moment of someone clearly Performing Gender but not being transgressive in that performance. Which isn’t to say it’s not a complicated performance; it’s a fine line Sansa walks between weaponizing her gender to protect herself without seeming too fake. She’s trying to placate the Lannisters by playing the perfect, dedicated, air headed betrothed because it’s the only defense she has - if she outwardly rebels, she will be punished in a likely violent and/or sexual way (which isn’t even conjecture - when she says “or maybe he’ll give me yours” Joffrey has her struck with an armored hand). She’s not quite successful in being convincing but that’s because it’s a rather extreme situation; despite no one believing her, she does make herself seem meek and stupid enough that no one suspects she’s plotting to escape with Dontos until she’s well away from KL. The fact that she even has Dontos to confide in is because of Sansa’s relationship with gender! When she saves him, she covers her rebellious slip by playing up Joffrey’s intelligence & his role as King; she reaches for “tools” of her gender AND of ~proper manhood~ to save a life and herself from another beating. Her retreats into the godswood and silence are very much Sansa attempting to recharge from these draining interactions, the same way a knight would need to stop and eat and rest after a fight. She is fighting, constantly, by forcing herself to stay within the narrow confines of a specific type of gender performance as a way of shielding herself from harm.

Ned yelling at Cat is another big one, and I’ve seen the scene referred to as Ned using his patriarchal power to scare Cat, which is a great description. It feels like a Performance because Ned is putting on this terrifying Lord Stark mask in an attempt to get Catelyn to stop asking about Jon (and Lyanna). This is not how he usually acts with those he loves! When Ned is with His People, he is welcoming of questions, curiosity, emotion, even transgressive thought (to a point! the idea that Ned is a feminist because he lets Arya learn to fight is Not accurate but you can’t deny he allows significantly more flexibility wrt gender expression than most of the fathers we meet in this series. the bar is in hell tho). Yet when Cat asks him about Jon’s mother, Ned scares her so well she stops asking & still remembers the moment bitterly over a decade later. And if that snippet we see through Bran’s eyes of Ned praying that Cat will forgive him does come after she asks (like it’s suspected), it’s clear not only that this is a performance he’s putting on & weaponizing against Cat, it’s one he does not like using as a weapon against someone he is close to. After using the power his gender gives him to cause harm, he retreats to the godswood and silence to pray and rest, much like Sansa. A spiritual cleanse, the way a soldier may pray after battle, to reset and reconnect Being A Proper Man to Being A Kind Man.

I think there’s something interesting in that two of the characters most widely defined by how well they adhere to Westerosi gender norms both dislike feeling like they had to weaponize their gender. They are exhausted by the performance, because it’s a performance. This isn’t Sansa getting excited over tourneys, or Ned teaching his sons to fight; it’s toxic masculinity, it’s structural misogyny. It’s something they’re good at, excel at, and connected to something they enjoy but when it’s paired with violence, whether done by Ned or done to Sansa, it crosses over in their minds from an innate part of themselves (The Gender) to a performance necessary due to survival (The Gender Role). And that after these performances, both retreat to nature & god as a way of resting and cleansing from the experience.