#plus the app we use for journaling is a mood tracker and we wanted to actually track how activities affect our moods

[thethingything]

catching up with missed journal entries from months ago using random shit we wrote down at the time plus stuff from our search history and tumblr posts and stuff, and we got to an entry for a day that was apparently so stressful we started shaking and getting a migraine before we'd even started writing it so that's something

[entity9silvergen]

How to Track Your Gender Fluidity

Recently I made a post with a screenshot of my gender tracker and was asked how I track my gender’s fluidity. I’ve been meaning to make an instructional post on how to set up the app so I redownloaded the app on a spare phone to show you guys.

In this tutorial, I will explain how to edit the MoodFlow App to track the fluidity of gender including changes and intensity, how to keep the app locked so others cannot look at your data, and how tracking genderfluidity can help someone better understand their gender identity. I will also provide some alternatives if you cannot use this app.

This method of tracking can be used by genderfluid, genderfaun, genderfae, genderflor, gendersylph, genderflux, fluidflux, boyflux, girlflux, enbyflux, questioning individuals, or anyone else on the genderfluid spectrum. Some personalization may be necessary but this tutorial will cover it.

Step 1: Downloading

You want to start by downloading the MoodFlow App.

As you can see, it is intended to be a mood tracker but there are customizable features so you can use it to track other things. It is available for free on the App Store and Google Play.

Step 2: Account Set up

The app will ask you to create an account. You will be prompted to put in your name and birthdate. These are optional. 

Step 3: Color Palette

As part of the account set up, you will be asked to pick a color palette. You can change these later or customize them but this is the first important thing when it comes to tracking your gender. The app intends these colors to represent how you’re feeling (very bad, bad, okay, good, very good) but we will be using them to loosely represent your spectrum of gender. Later, these colors will make it easy to visually track your gender. There are five colors but it is okay if you have more than five genders. We will get to that later. They’re more like umbrellas for now. These colors will be a broad, simplified representation which gender you are experiencing on a given days. We will now look at the palettes (see below).

As a genderfaun individual, I personally use the "Default-Balance” palette (purple, purple-blue, blue, blue-green, green) to represent non-binary (purple), male (blue), agender (green), and the genders in between (purple-blue for bigender and blue-green for demigender). It is not a perfect system it works for me.

If you are a genderfae individual, I recommend the “Silver to Purple,” or “Sunset” palettes to represent how your gender varies from feminine, to neutral, to faded or whatever else.

If your fluidity covers the whole spectrum, I’d recommend “Farfalle,” “Sea and Sun,” “Pink to Blue,” “Yellows and Blues,” or “Kilimanjaro.” They have a range of masculine and feminine colors as well as some neutral grounds and mixes.

For any boyfluxes or masculine genderflux people, “Grey Means Neutral,” “By The Lake,” “Tea,” or “Into the Distance” could be used to represent the varying intensity of your gender.

For any girlfluxes or feminine genderflux people, “Raise the Lantern” or “All Pastel Everything” could be used to represent the changing intensity of your gender.

“Gray Scale Me” is a good choice for any genderflux individual with only one gender.

“Mojito,” “Outerspace,” and “Into The Distance” are good choices for people who are xenogender, agender, or just do not like the traditional “masculine vs feminine" system.

Again, you can edit these later, make a custom color palette, or you can just ignore using colors and use other features (explained later) but having a color palette to represent the range of your genderfludity is helpful. You don’t have to use these recommendations either. For me, I associate genders with their flags so I pick colors similar to those but you can do whatever feels right. Any color can represent any gender. You can also play around with it later to find whatever colors fit you best.

Step 4: Settings

When you are done setting up your account, you will open the screen to a calendar.

If you tap the three bars on the top, you will be given a sidebar where you can visit your settings.

In the settings, you can change your personal information, log in and out of your account, enable or disable notifications, and change your rating colors (the color palette).

Step 5: Personalization and Security

Within the settings, you will see the options to change your emotions & ratings, background, activities, and add a pinlock.

The background change is self-explanatory. There's a wide variety of stock images that are very nice but you can also add your own. I like using flags. If you’ve seen any of my old posts, I use a design with cats in the colors of the transflag. If you would like any wallpapers, you can ask me, you can check out r/lgbtwallpaper, just use google images, take your own photo, or use your own art.

You can use the pinlock to prevent other people from looking at your data. If you are in the closet, this can be a very useful so people don’t look at your information. Make sure you remember your pin though. 

You can also back up data here but that is something to worry about later.

You can make other changes as well depending on preference.

Step 6: Gender(s), Pronouns, Intensity, etc.

Open emotions & ratings to create your genders. You can also add genders later when you are making entries but it is easy to do here.

Here, you can rename your colors. Where it says rating, just tap the words next to it and you can change it.

To make genders, start by picking your layout. The options are grid, mix, segment, and segment #2. I personally like using segment #2. The layout will separate your genders into four categories. You cannot rename the categories (they will be labeled positive & energized, positive & calm, negative & calm, and negative & energized) so if seeing them bothers you, pick mix. For the tutorial, I am picking segment #2.

You will then see a section labeled editor. You will have the option to add emotions and remove emotions. Start by removing all of the emotions. It starts with 60 (the maximum) so this may take some time.

Once you’ve deleted all the emotions, you can add your genders. It will prompt you to name it and put it in a category (positive & energized, positive & calm, negative & calm, and negative & energized). The categories don’t affect anything but it will change the order the genders are displayed and how they will appear in the app’s analysis features. 

Since I am fluidflux and like using the segment #2 layout, I like to order them by intensity. I put libragenders and agender under positive & energized, demigenders under positive & calm, paragenders under negative & calm, and “full” genders under negative & energized. If you are not genderflux, I would recommend sorting them by feminine, masculine, neutral/ other, xenogender, unsure, etc. Again, this depends on the individual so you may want to play around with it. Here is mine:

After you create and organize all of your genders, return to your settings and scroll down to activities. Like before, delete all the activities. 

Below, there are a collection of icons. Tap one and you will be able to create an activity. I like to track what pronouns I use, the intensity of my gender, and how fluid or static my gender is. You can also add things like how you’re experiencing gender dysphoria or euphoria that day, your gender expression, and how you are presenting that day. There are many icons to choose from so pick which ones you think suit which thing best.

Step 7: Tracking Your Gender

To track your gender, exit your settings to the app’s homescreen. If you are having trouble finding it, tap the middle option on the bar on the bottom that says “Feed.” Then, in the same spot, tap the plus (+) button. You will be taken to a screen where you add your entry for the day. You should ideally add one entry per day. You need to pick a color summarizing your gender for the day and can select the individual genders you are feeling at the time. Here, you can also add or remove genders by hitting customize.

Hit continue to move to activities. Here, you can select pronouns, intensity, etc. You also have the option of adding photos or listing medication. Listing medication is helpful if you are on testosterone or estrogen and the photos are helpful if you want to remember how you are presenting that day or want to track the effects of HRT.

There is also a place to type labeled journal if you would like to write a more detailed explanation of how you’re experiencing gender or if anything noteworthy has occurred. 

By hitting customize, you can enable or disable features. A feature you can enable is tracking sleep. Sleep is tracked on a sliding scale so genderflux individuals can use this to track the intensity of their gender as well.

Step 8: Viewing Your Gender

You can best view your gender from the homescreen/ the feed. Any entries from that day will be shown at the top. By tapping it, you have the option of editing it if you would like to change something later. I would recommend not deleting genders from your entry if your gender changes during the day and instead indicating in some way that it changed.

You can scroll down to see the calendar for that month. Each day will be highlighted with the color you choose that day, making it easy to see any patterns. This is why we choose colors representing masculinity, femininity, neutrality, etc rather than having colors represent individual genders.

On the bottom bar, you can tap calendar to see other months’ data.

The journal section is the place to write down any detailed entries. The insight section will provide some analysis of your entries. 

The most useful data is at the top. It will display the oscillation of your gender and the spread over an adjustable period of time based on color.

Below, it will also show how many times you selected a specific gender, pronoun, intensity, etc.

Step 9: More Personalization

Everyone’s gender is different. You may need to edit this further to fit your fluidity. Some people have less than five genders they are fluid between so each color could represent one gender, some people may want different colors to represent different umbrellas of gender, and more. 

If you are multigender/ experience more than one gender at a time, it can be kind of difficult figuring out how to add an entry for that. Adding more genders and activities can make it more detailed. It just depends how specific you want your tracker to be.

Just play around with it and figure out what is right for you.

Step 10: Why Tracking Your Gender Is Helpful

Pretty much every trans person has those self-doubt moments and people on the genderfluid spectrum often experience that to a greater degree. I think we all know that feeling when your gender changes and you wonder “What if I’ve been this the whole time?” Very scary, especially if you’re just beginning to figure yourself out or if you’ve already come out.

Tracking your gender helps with that feeling. By having something physical you can look at that proves your gender really was a different one in the past and you weren’t faking or deceiving yourself.

You can see my tracking from 2021 above. I started a new gender tracker this year. In 2020, my gender was actually male (blue) most of the time and my gender would change in some way every few days. As you can see, I was non-binary or bigender for pretty much all of January this year and flipped to libramasculine on the final day. That is very unusual for me so if I was not tracking my gender, I wouldn’t know my gender fluidity was following an abnormal pattern and I likely would have doubted myself a lot and questioned if I was ever really a boy.

If you are questioning your gender identity, a tracker can be helpful because it is more reliable than your memory, assuming you don’t delete anything. There is less room for doubt if you are looking at evidence you really did experience something. And, if you are questioning the fluidity of your gender, the same thing applies.

Of course, someone who is not genderfluid can try this and if you later realize you are not genderfluid despite having varied data on a tracker, that is okay as well. This is a helpful tool but it is not for everyone and ultimately you are the best judge of your identity.

If you cannot use this app, you can also use a calendar or planner. If you are in the closet, marking each day with a colored highlighter isn’t that suspicious. You can also write down the genders you experience on different days and such. You could also try using a period tracker but that may be more difficult since you usually cannot change the settings and symptoms on those.

Anyway, I hope this was helpful. Let me know if you end up using this. Feel free to ask questions to me privately or in the comments or share this post with others. Have fun tracking your gender guys, gals, and non-binary pals!

[reflectionsofneptune]

a little thread on self-care apps

in honour of Saturn and Jupiter doing their ting in Aquarius, here’s a thread of some free apps you can try out for self-care.

I hope this provides a lil bit of value for you. 

oak.

has three different options for meditations you can do such as a mindful meditation, a loving kindness meditation and an unguided meditation. I personally like the unguided meditation because I can have a bit more control by putting an interval timer, changing the background noise and time duration. plus there’s a countdown option too before you begin, which I love so that I can try and prepare before the meditation actually starts. so many times mediations start right off the bat, and well, I just wasn’t ready ha. as well as that, it gives you personal stats on how you’re doing and also the community who have download this app are doing. you can see how many people are mediating/breathing right now which I find motivating. also has options for breathing exercises and for winding down to sleep. 

eternal sunshine

this app really has a lot to offer. so many guided meditations including ones to aid you in developing your chakras, or help you with anxiety before a test, or do when there is a full or new moon. I did a pre-ritual meditation which included tapping into the elements and let me tell you, the tea I got from the upcoming monthly tarot spread was scorching. we love to see it. it has affirmations for the chakras for example, and then affirmation exercises which allow you to get even more involved. for people who want more accountability they have seven day meditations, too. you can opt into little tidbits of prayers and wisdom to show up on your phone throughout the day. but what I really value about this app is the inspirational talks they offer. it covers a range of topics, like gratitude, dealing with anger, suicide, not giving up. real life shit. 

feelyou

a mood-tracker app where you can post how you feel at any time. the great thing about this app is you can be totally anonymous. people from around the world can ‘feel you’ on whatever you post, and reply with support. the feelings options you have are calm, anxious, happy, sad, terrible and amazing. stats are provided too so you can see percentages of how many people with the app feel the same as you. there are communities you can join or make too. there’s a huge variety on there, from LGBTQA+ groups, BTS groups, cosplay groups, gratitude groups, cancer support groups and cooking groups. I even saw a group titled “I’m here to listen.” and for me, that was poignant because for someone, that’s all they want at the end of the day. 

#selfcare

the. cutest. app. right off the bat, it will remind you to bring awareness to your body. where you’re keeping tension. it will remind you to breathe. accountability. it will ask you questions that encourage you to reflect more. the apps background is that of a bedroom with a person under the covers whose skin colour can be changed. but it’s interactive. you have an altar, you have tarot cards which you can pull a daily pull from. there’s a candle you can use to aid you in setting intentions or do candle gazing. for some people, I know even before COVID-19 happened couldn’t or didn’t want to leave their bedroom. the act of tidying up their room was something they found difficult. in the app, you can tidy up clothes on the floor which to me is a very satisfying little feature. there’s a journal option which you can customise, as well as a tape recorder so you can vocally get what you need off your chest. there’s so many other features, but get this. there’s a lil baby black cat you can interact with too. what more could you want? this app holds space for you. 

aloebud (only available on iPhone)

designed in a teal (?) colour in a grid layout, for me this app is aesthetically pleasing. the whole point of it is that you choose activity cards of things such as hydrating yourself, breathing, connecting with others, taking a break. you can customise it so you can have reminders to do these things at a set time/day of the week, too. the app gives you an option to check in to keep accountability or to reflect on the theme of an activity card to gain more presence. there is a “people” activity card too, and one of the prompts it gives you is to write an encouraging message to your future self. that screams Saturn in Aquarius to me. there’s an activity log which allows you to congratulate on yourself on things you’ve done throughout the day. 

stoic (only available on iPhone)

this is another app that just screams daddy’s home. (Saturn rules Aquarius in traditional rulership) based on the concept of stoicism, the colour scheme is black and white. very fitting. also very fitting that an aries stellium introduced me to this concept. like most self-care apps, it has a range of exercises you can do but what makes this one different is that they have something called “fear setting”. a three-step exercise that encourages you to go deep into what is holding you back right now. as well as that, there’s an option to do negative visualisation which is meant to further build up gratitude in your life. in the journal entries you can complete, there is an option to draw/scribble/doodle something along with your words which is fun. lastly, with every exercise they provide, they really get to the nitty gritty of what it does for you. they provide links to ted talks, or give you example scenarios so you can better relate. it’s all laid out for you. 

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Submission

tw: cleaning stress, mild hoarding, unhealthy weight loss mention.

hello, lovely mods! you can tag me as Ari to make sure i see your answer, please.

i know you’ve received some questions regarding cleaning and hoarding before so i just wanted to ask for advice in regards to my own situation. basically my room’s condition is really stressing me out. i’ve been watching some videos of extreme hoarders and my room isn’t at that level. i don’t keep pizza boxes, bottles, or other types of trash, but i don’t think all the items i have are necessary either. i do not have my own transportation to take me somewhere like a donation site. i don’t have any friends or siblings or cousins who can come by and take some of my old stuff. we don’t live in a good area for a garage sale. i’ve thought of selling online but there’s a number of reasons why i can’t (i don’t have transportation to the post office, i don’t have a way to receive payment through online transactions). for clothes, i did try plato’s closet once but they wouldn’t accept my clothes because i don’t own any brand name stuff plus the employees were very snobby and classist.

clothes are what my parents complain about me keeping the most, but i had several weight fluctuations and don’t feel comfortable letting go of my clothes. when i was much heavier, i wore baggy jeans and wore a C cup, but then i became very underweight so now i only fit into leggings, and bras without cups, like running bras. (i am hoping to regain my weight and fit into my old clothes again, since this was not a healthy or positive weight loss, but it has been a long process and i have to stick to extra-small clothes for now) i also have some items i want to keep but don’t know if i have room for. for example, i have a lot of books and my mental state has been too low for reading, i am dealing with trauma and panic disorder, but i know at some point, i will feel in the mood to read again and it’s just been hard for me to be in that mindset recently. i also keep a lot of journals for mental health purposes, and yes i know mood tracker apps exist but it is a lot more cathartic for me to actually write with pen in a notebook and it’s a way for me to keep track of my progress, treatments, and so on (so it’s the type of info i might not want to put on an app anyway for privacy reasons). anyway, when i “clean” since i can’t throw those things away, it sort of feels like i’m just moving stuff around, making new piles but not getting rid of any actual stuff. i find myself feeling super stressed. the one thing i’ve done is to not bring in more items, so at least i’m not adding to the mess. but this still just seems so hard to handle. please give me some advice when you can. thank you. signed, Ari - Hey there Ari,

First of all, I want to commend you for reaching out and for recognizing that you want to work on this. I will direct you to this ask that a fellow mod answered regarding hoarding. There, you’ll find a number of resources for hoarding behavior. Even if you do not meet the technical definition for hoarding, you’re absolutely valid to use the resources and coping skills that one would suggest for a hoarder. 

There may be ways for you to sell things locally, such as Facebook Marketplace, where the buyer could give you cash and come to you. To parse through your clothes, make sure you’re in an okay mindset first. Then, look at just a few clothes and decide if you can sell them, throw them in the garbage, or keep them. Don’t overwhelm yourself by trying to get through all of your old clothes in one sitting. It’s absolutely okay to keep a good amount of the old clothes, since you’re recovering and will need them in the future. That’s honestly a great, hopeful, beautiful idea. If possible, I would communicate this to your parents so hopefully they lay off a bit and understand that keeping those particular items is beneficial. 

Take care.

- Misa

[techno12]

Mobile healthcare apps

INTRODUCTION

Fitness is important to everyone. It can help you feel better, have more energy, and live a healthier lifestyle. But it can also be difficult to stick to a fitness routine because it requires a lot of discipline and commitment. we will be reviewing mobile healthcare apps to see which ones are worth your time. We will be reviewing apps that provide services like weight management, depression treatment, and sleep tracking. Mobile App Development Company in Bangalore With the rise of mobile health applications, it's easier than ever to stay healthy. our research found that some of these apps are better than others, so take a look and get yourself some better health! Get Healthy with These Fitness Tips

Weight management apps

To manage weight effectively, it is important to choose the right type of app. There are many types of apps available, but some are better than others. Here are some of the best weight management apps that are available.

1. Weight Watchers This app is specifically made for people who are trying to lose weight. It is a great app to use to help you stay on track. However, it should be noted that this app is not a free app.

2. MyFitnessPal This is another great weight management app that is free to use. It is a very popular and well-known app that is used by people all over the world.

3. Apple Watch If you are looking for a weight management app that is compatible with your Apple Watch, this is the app for you. You can use this app to monitor your weight and food intake.

4. Weight Loss Calculator This app is great for people who are trying to lose weight. It is a free app that is available for both Apple and Android devices.

5. Fitbit If you are looking for a weight management app compatible with your Fitbit, this is the app for health management.

Depression treatment apps

One of the most important tools for patients with depression is a mobile healthcare app. This tool allows you to self-monitor your condition and monitor the progress you are making. The following mobile healthcare apps have been reviewed and are currently available in the market:

1. Mood notes - This mobile app allows you to track your mood, thoughts, and feelings in a journal. It can also provide you with advice to help you through your depression.

2. Mood Journal - This app allows you to track your moods and thoughts in a journal. It also provides you with insights into how your mood changes and how you can help yourself.

3. Mood Kit - This app is designed to help you understand your mood and give you advice on how to manage your condition.

4. Mood Kit Plus - This app is a mood tracker that can be used to monitor your mood and give you insights into how your mood changes.

5. Mood Diary - This app allows you to record your moods and thoughts in a journal. It also tracks your moods and gives you insights into how your mood changes.

6. Moods - This app is designed to help you understand your mood.

Sleep tracking apps

There are many apps available for people who are looking for a way to track their sleep patterns. These apps are typically used to help people understand their sleep habits and see how they can improve. These apps can be helpful for people who are suffering from sleep disorders, insomnia, or jet lag. They can also be helpful for people who want to understand their sleep patterns and why they wake up feeling tired. The nine apps mentioned are Sleep Cycle, Sleep As Android, Sleep Time, Sleep Cycle Alarm Clock, Sleep Time Alarm Clock, Sleep Time, Sleep Cycle, Sleep Watch, and Sleepy Time.

Conclusion

There are many ways to stay healthy in today’s world. With so many apps to choose from, it can be difficult to find the right one. And with so many apps available, it can be difficult to know which one is the best. Healthcare apps are a great way to manage your health, no matter where you go. Whether you’re sick, or you’re just looking for ways to be healthier, mobile apps can help you keep track of your health. But with so many on the market, it can be difficult to decide which apps are worth your time.

Brillmindz is one of the top mobile app and game app development companies in India. We have a team of skilled developers who work on different platforms. We have successfully developed many apps with various clients from all over the world. We can help you build your dream app with our mobile app design and development services. We have expert developers who can build any app for any operating system.

Visit more: Mobile Game development company in India

email us: info@brillmindz.com

[pissmood]

basically im just going to use this as a mood tracker and journal bc everythibg in the app store costs money that i dont have bc my account is $-300 because the hotel charges are still pending on my account! i dont really want to use an app anyway because what if i dont end up liking it? and most of them are like $30 a year or some shit and its stupid to me. every time im at work i look at the journal section and think about buying one but for some reason im scared. what if someone i know reads it? of course thats always an option here but idk, something about typing into the void seems safer because i have plausible deniability that its me, plus i can just delete a tumblr easily. plus the idea of strangers reading about my thoughts and my day is weirdly therapeutic sounding. maybe someone new will reach out and i’ll make a friend. probably not, but the chance is not 0.

anyway today was pretty okay. im 2 days in to my week off of work. i took a week off because ive been feeling overwhelmed and my partner said he doesnt mind. i didnt do a single thing today. just played around on my phone, didnt even play a video game, unless you count shining nikki lol. side note, im absolutely obsessed with nikki, theres a new event going in game and her dialogue makes me think she’s autistic which is probably why i love her so much lol. but yea, mainly just hung around all day, i put on lingerie because i thought my bf would like it, which he did, but idk i was hoping for something more romantic than what happened but oh well. after that i had a job interview at an ice cream shop, and i tried it out while i was there and it was delicious. then we went grocery shopping and went down every isle :). after getting home we ate snacks and i watched more tiktoks. i saw one that was like “POV: u grew up with a single mom in the early 2000s” and it showed a bunch of pics that really reminded me of my mom. it made me sad. ive been missing her a lot lately, i dont know why. i just wish i could talk to her, maybe see if being 24 was this fucking hard and desperate feeling for her too. idk. and then me and my partner were just talking about whatever and he mentioned how much he just doesnt want to do anything, and it made me realize how much i force him to do stuff with me. he never complained about it and when i brought it up he said he doesnt really mind, but i want to do better for him. i always ask him to take me places and do things with me on his days off, and i need to give him space to breathe. he works way harder than i ever could, and i dont really let him rest. i mean im taking a whole week off after we ALREADY took a weekend together to see my family because im so burnt out and stressed, i need to let him have time to do nothing too. i meed to respect his time and space like he does for me. i know he said he doesnt mind running errands eith me on his off days but idk. i just want to do right by him.

basically im just writing all this stuff down because i need to be able to self reflect, i meed to be able to get this all out and i dont know how else to do it. i want to write here about my day every day. ive been so overwhelmed recently and maybe this will help. maybe seeing it all written out will make me realize its not that bad and im just being a dramatic baby about everything. but yea i just want to be able to liveblog my life LMAO. tomorrow should be fun because me and my partner are going to my friends house to watch the meteor shower. very excited about that :).

[rediscoveringmichelle]

Where to start? Resources to help on the road to recovery.

Okay a bit of a brain dump but I thought I would put together a list of some of the resources that helped me with recovering from an obsession with exercise and healthy eating. This may be helpful to those struggling or parents of those struggling to understand what their child may be going through and the help they might need.

1. Therapy – this is THE most important one for me and one I didn’t really do enough of until after I gained back the weight. I think it would have been better for me to go during recovery, but it all depends on whether you are ready to admit you have a problem to yourself and then to someone else. Eating disorders are usually a symptom of an underlying problem – perhaps a desire for control and safety when life feels out of control elsewhere or a desire to fit in and be liked by others in order to accept yourself. Therefore in order to really recover it is important to get to the root of why it has developed in order to heal your relationship with yourself so that you can start living your life again.

2. Books – I have always loved learning, especially through reading self-care or non-fiction books. Any time I discover a new topic I’m interested in I get lost in it and want to educate myself on everything to do with it. Some of the books that have helped me on my journey:

a. Intuitive Living by Pandora Paloma – about understanding where your relationship with food comes from and it was a good starting point for me to realise there was something deeper behind what I was going through. Lots of exercises to work through to think about the type of person you are and your early memories of food and body image.

b. Just Eat It by Laura Thomas – Mum (not so subtly) left this around the house and during lockdown I decided to pick it up and give it a go. My eyes were opened. This book is about Intuitive Eating but it is really so much more than that. It is about learning to trust our bodies again and tune in to our internal cues, rather than looking externally to trackers, social media or a time on the clock for when and how to eat or exercise.

c. The Comparison Cure by Lucy Sheridan – I have always suffered with tendency to compare myself to others – my body, career success and relationships – never quite feeling like I have matched up. I heard Lucy being interviewed on a podcast and decided to read her book. This book helps you to list the areas of your life where you experience comparison tendencies the most and then understand why this is. Through doing exercises and journaling it helps you to discover your core values and who you truly are. Lucy’s theory is that by being your authentic self and feeling like you are reaching your goals you won’t feel a need to compare yourself anymore and can find happiness in yourself and in your life.

d. Women Don’t Owe You Pretty by Florence Given– a good starting point for questioning why we do the things we do as women. Why do we wear make-up, shave our legs and wear tight clothes? You might be thinking that is gross and that the thought of not shaving it a step too far. But I’m not asking you not to do and neither is Florence. She is just asking you to start questioning why you do it. Most of the reasons stem back to wanting to please men, so that we can be loved. And don’t get me wrong I still shave my legs, but it’s about helping you to understand that you shouldn’t feel a need to please men and that you can learn to love yourself, regardless of whether others love you.

e. The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown – I don’t know about you, but I am a massive perfectionist. And I know that is the standard response in an interview to the question ‘what is your biggest weakness?’ and is seen as a cop out! People think its really a big plus. But for me it isn’t. It has led me to procrastinate, to not push myself to present at work and get the visibility I need to be promoted because my presentation ‘isn’t quite there yet’. I tend to only want to try things if I think I will be good at them. I either do things perfectly or not at all (like exercising every day or never). It has led me to feel no matter what I do, its never quite good enough. This can be incredibly tiring and mentally draining. Brené tries to encourage us to be vulnerable and to not be afraid of just showing up as we are, warts and all.

f. Untamed by Glennon Doyle – more of a story of her life and realisation that as women we constantly put others first. That the biggest compliment we can pay a woman is that she is selfless. But by being selfish, putting your needs first, you can have more energy and power to help others. If you always put others first, there is no one left there to give.

g. Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport – so not really a book on eating disorders or body image but a real eye opener. I read this before the Social Dilemma came out on Netflix and this goes through a lot of the same topics on the negatives of social media. However, this is more about how to get back your life outside social media. I went from someone who posted multiple times a week, every moment of her day, to not at all, and I still don’t have the apps on my phone. The book helped me to realise that I didn’t know what I wanted to do any more as I only ever did things that I thought would get likes on Instagram. I started to fill the evenings I had spent scrolling out living a life and the one I wanted to live. A very important step for me in recovery and I noticed a massive change in my mood once I did this.

h. Be Your Own Best Friend: The Glorious Truths of Being Female by Chessie King – I feel like all women should read this book. Chessie is a breathe of fresh air and although we as women are more than our bodies, Chessie helps you to realise that the most important relationship you have is with yourself and that you are stuck with this body so you can either spend your life hating it and punishing it or just start loving it.

i. More Than a Body by Lexie Kite and Lyndsay Kite – I found a lot of the books on body positivity easier to understand and get on board with when I was thinner. But I’ll be honest, when I started to put on weight the concept of body positivity became harder. My body was changing every week, so I didn’t know how to love it. The minute I would accept it, it would change again, and I was back at square one. But this book goes beyond body positivity and teaches us to see ourselves as more than a body. To think of our bodies as instruments for doing the things we want to do, rather than ornaments to be looked at.

j. No Period Now What by Dr. Nicola Rinaldi – my most recent read. After regaining weight, no longer feeling cold all of the time and feeling like I could laugh again, my period still hasn’t come back. This book led me to going to the doctors and learning more about why this could be happening and to then reaching out to a therapist to help understand my body image issues in order to reduce my stress levels. Can be shocking to read at first as I certainly wasn’t ready for this approach last year but have now come to terms with the fact that I just have to try it. As I have nothing left to lose.

3. Podcasts – I’m a big fan of podcasts. I started with the first one below and then found more through listening to the podcasts of Laura’s guests. A nice snippet into a concept without reading a whole book and a nice listen for a walk.

a. Don’t Salt My Game by Laura Thomas – lots of interviews with people that have gone through similar experiences and come through the other side, a helpful listen and a nice accompaniment to her book.

b. Train Happy by Tally Rye – Tally has lots of energy and passion for finding fun ways to move. She interviews people on topics to do with intuitive movement, exercise and body image. She also has a book that I am yet to read.

c. Food Psych Podcast with Christy Harrison – I listened to a couple of episodes of this alongside Don’t Salt My Game at the start and helped understand some more of the science.

d. Holistic Health Radio with Sarah Liz King – an interesting podcast to understand more about Hypothalamic Amenorrhea (no period due to too much exercise, stress or undereating) and helpful tips for getting your period back!

4. Family and Friends – this was a hard one for me. Admitting I was wrong and that I had gone too far after a long time of telling people they didn’t understand and that I was fine. But ultimately, I found that by being honest I had nothing to fear as it was all out there and that by being open about my struggles I could potentially help someone else from having to go through what I did.

This is a bit of a work in progress list and I will continue to add to it as I go but I hope you find it helpful. I can only offer advice from my experiences but ultimately if you are struggling a therapist, registered dietitian or a doctor may be the best place to start.

[mikeyd1986]

MIKEY’S PERSONAL BLOG 135, December 2018

Last Saturday night, I attended the CinFull Fitness Christmas break-up held at The Main Cafe Bar Restaurant in Berwick. Considering that I had to work for 9 hours and quickly got myself changed after work (into an ugly Christmas sweater of course), I was amazed at how “awake” I was. The restaurant was a lot more fully booked than I expected and I could tell that the staff were flat off their feet. I easily found the table that Cinamon booked for us so I just decided to walk on over.

The sad reality is that I hardly ever go out socially so tonight I was making the most of it. Still, I was being sensible with my alcohol intake especially when I had to get up early for work the next day. Cinamon made up these cute little gift bags with a personalised name tag, each containing some bath bombs and choccies. It was a really sweet and thoughtful gesture. I decided to order the poached chicken with chips, which ironically was the first meal to arrive considering I got there a bit late.

Even though social situations will continue to be a challenge for me, I was doing my best simply tuning into the conversations happening around me. As I’ve stated before in previous blogs, it takes a while for me to be comfortable enough to open up about myself to people. I guess it’s a self-defensive mechanism of mine, being cautious about who I trust and trying my best not to get hurt. I’m certainly not a closed book either, simply just shy and reserved.

I could also tell that these girls (and guy) were all pretty relaxed around me. That actually puts me at ease because I know girls can have preconceived notions about men but the truth is that they have nothing to fear. I try to be the most easy going, friendly, caring, humble man because that’s my nature. We did have plenty of laughs and somehow I managed to stay for over 2 hours, which is a pretty big achievement for me.

I didn’t even need to rush over to the toilet once (for a mental regroup) so that shows my progress with being in social situations. I enjoyed my night and I’m really looking forward to smashing more fitness and confidence goals in 2019 with CinFull Fitness.

On Monday afternoon, I had an appointment with my occupational therapist Ambika from Everyday Independence. I was feeling a bit nervous and apprehensive today as I really didn’t know what I’d be in for. I did my best to create a calming, relaxed space in the dining room with my folder full of notes, a notepad, glass of water and radio playing softly in the background. At least I could say that I was physically prepared for this.

The appointment seemed to go pretty smoothly as Ambika gauged what I needed assistance with at home and together we put together a helpful weekly planner to add household chores to including cooking, cleaning, dusting vacuuming, sweeping, wiping certain rooms of the house. She also made it realistic and manageable, considering I don’t do many of these tasks currently, in order to build up motivation and confidence gradually.

She’s set me the task of preparing my own recipe for dinner including writing out a shopping list and buying all the ingredients. Sounds simple enough, it’s just the “doing” part now. Ambika also recommended a few apps I could use to help with moods, coping strategies for stress and anxiety as well as daily planning and checklists. These are Daylio - Diary, Journal and Mood Tracker, Headspace: Meditation and Mindfulness and Google Keep - Notes & Lists.  

On Monday night, I attended my last Boxing class for the year with Cinamon Guerin at CinFull Fitness in Narre Warren South. It’s hard to believe that it’s been five months since I’ve joined this group and I can definitely see the improvements I’ve made with my confidence, focus, determination and drive. I’ve always been slow to warm up when it comes to learning boxing techniques and combos but it doesn’t take me long before I’ve “got it”. https://www.expertboxing.com/boxing-basics/how-to-box/the-beginners-guide-to-boxing

It was just a couple of us tonight (Sam, Sarah and myself) but I was content with that. I was actually worried that I wouldn’t get there on time with all the local peak-hour traffic making me run late but I made it. We did some EMOM (Every Minute on the Minute) drills which involved 10 jabs, 20 uppercuts, 30 highs and 40 hooks plus 4 side to side straddles, 10 star jumps, a squat hold and 10 V-crunches. Plus some continuous walking combos which made us all laugh.  

I’m hoping that in the new year, I’ll be able to come to classes more regularly and even stick around for a “double” one time. But right now I know my limits in terms of physical fitness. It’s something I need to continue to work on so that I don’t get as tired or fatigued as often. It’s about forming better habits and smashing through goals gradually. It doesn’t matter how many times I go off track, I’m going to keep bringing myself back.

On Tuesday morning, Mum and I attended the City of Casey - School Crossing Supervisor’s Christmas social function held at Zagame's Berwick Hotel. Switching the venue from last year’s event at the Lynbrook Hotel to here seemed like a good idea on paper considering how large the turnout was. Sadly, they still ran into a few problems such as using a “random bingo number” system to organise everyone’s meal orders. It was chaotic and messy to say the least especially with Sonya having to yell out the numbers instead of using a microphone. Going table by table would have been much more efficient but never mind.

We were lucky to sit in a comfy circular booth near the rear of the Sports Bar with Mum’s friend Val plus Kay and Ray. They put on a Morning Melodies performance for an hour, playing a mixture of Christmas songs (Hark Now Hear The Angels Sing, Blue Christmas, Rockin’ Around The Christmas Tree) and a few classics including ABBA’s Dancing Queen and Honey Honey, You’re The One That I Want by John Travolta & Olivia Newton John and Sugar, Honey Honey by The Archies.

After the drama with the main meals was over, Dreena (the School Crossing Co-ordinator) announced a few years of service awards and drew out some door prizes. Mum was lucky enough to win one which I was very pleased about. As expected, I got asked the question of what I’ll be doing next year. I always find it really daunting and hard answering because I never really know myself. I’ve lived this year pretty much day to day.

It’s like people expect you to have your life mapped out for the next 5-10 years but in reality, I’m lucky to plan a month in advance. However, I am considering enroling in one of the free TAFE courses such as the Certificate IV in Mental Health as I have personal experience as well as a keen interest in that area. Plus I still have a burning passion for creative writing including blogs and music/movie reviews and also getting back into art again. So there you go. Hopefully that’s a satisfying enough answer for those wondering.

On Tuesday night, I went to the final Body Balance class for 2018 with Astrid held at YMCA Casey RACE in Cranbourne East. I was still feeling very tense through my upper back and shoulders after my boxing session last night so I figured some yoga and pilates stretches should help with that. We did the new release (number 83) which features tracks including Towards The Sun by Rhianna, Die Young by Sylvan Esso, There She Goes by Leon Bridges, I Need a Forest Fire by James Blake & Bon Iver. https://www.lesmills.com/workouts/fitness-classes/bodybalance/#facType=modal&filterType=0&classes=bb

Overall, this wasn’t a bad release. The balance tracks and Pilates were the most challenging parts for me but I did what I could given my limitations. Here is a breakdown of the exercises: Tai Chi Warm Up (Overhead arm circles, Flowing Water arms), Sun Salutations (Forward Fold, Low Lunge, Downward Facing Dog, Plank, Crocodile, Baby Cobra), Standing Strength (Warrior 1, Warrior 2, Joyful Warrior, Intense Pose), Balance (Half Moon pose, Falling Star pose), Pilates Core (Foot circles, V-crunches, Bicycle crunches, Bow pose), Twists and Seated Poses (Swan pose, Wide Legged Forward Fold with Side Stretches, Half Lord of the Fishes pose), Hamstrings (Butterfly pose, Happy Baby pose) and Relaxation. https://www.livestrong.com/article/39660-body-balance-class/

On Friday morning, I had my first appointment with a speech pathologist named Amon from Everyday Independence. Was it going to be like the opening scene from Everybody Loves Raymond? (THEY’RE COMING! Come and sing a song of joy!). Probably not. That’s just my anxiety trying hard to freak me out. New person alert. Oh shit! It’s something I need to seriously confront in order to gain more self confidence really. And the reality is that he’s here to help me. https://www.everydayind.com.au/our-therapies/speech-pathology/

Today’s assessment involved being asked a lot of scerario-based questions related to my communication skills and how I talk with people I know and people I’m not familiar with. It was pretty difficult and confronting at times especially the part on making conversation. This is an area where I have huge issues and a lot of sensitivity about ever since my childhood. Plus it’s really draining answering questions for 1.5 hours. https://www.everydayind.com.au/therapy/communications-skills/

Luckily, Amon was very friendly and easy going. It was just tough coming up with decent answers like how I respond in certain situations and trying to remember specific examples of times when this happened. When you’re in a brain fog or you simply can’t come up with anything, it’s embarrassing as. But Amon was quite patient during these awkward silences and didn’t push me too hard.

We also came up with a couple of goals to work towards over the next 12 months. This includes: Being more confident and using strategies to make conversation with others, especially people that I’m not familiar with. Developing friendships with people I feel comfortable with and be able to spend time socially with in the future. I rated my level of importance has high for both of these goals. Hopefully 2019 will be a more successful year for me in terms of achieving more self-confidence and better communication.

“The cold wind is blowin' and the streets are getting dark. I'm writin' you a letter and I don't know where to start. The bells will be ringin' Saint John the Divine. I get a little lonely every year around this time...I've got to know (Nobody ought to be all alone on Christmas). Where do the lonely hearts go (Nobody ought to be all alone on Christmas). Oh cause' nobody ought to be all alone on Christmas.” Darlene Love - All Alone On Christmas (1992)

“All around the world. Anticipation. 'Cause here it comes again (you see). No matter where you are. It could be near or far. But it still feels like Christmas time to me. I tell you what you already know. Forget and ready to let it go. The countdown has begun. Whether you're in the mmh. North, South, it's all the same. Let your troubles fade away. Get ready to love everyone.” Kylie Minogue & Dannii Minogue - 100 Degrees (2015)

[fashiontrendin-blog]

15 celebrities wearing nipple pasties & being totally extra about it 💁

http://fashion-trendin.com/15-celebrities-wearing-nipple-pasties-being-totally-extra-about-it-%f0%9f%92%81/

15 celebrities wearing nipple pasties & being totally extra about it 💁

It’s fashion’s cleverest workaround: What do you do if you want to show your boobs but not expose that ‘hotly-debated’ areola? Rock a nipple pastie, o’ course.

Miley Cyrus, Kendall Jenner and Lady Gaga are staunch purveyors of the pastie, and it’s only becoming more and more popular. Nipple pasties are very ‘Saint Laurent’ at the moment and coincide with fashion’s current obsession with everything sheer.

Some celebrities have even taken to not bothering to cover their unspeakables at all. Go, Rihanna!

Here we have 13 celebrities who have rocked nipple pasties and have been totally un-low key about the whole thing…

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[30daysnophone]

Day Zero

The day it happened perfectly represents a pretty typical day in my life—running around the city using various modes of transportation for back-to-back events. After work, I walked from the Loop to River North to meet up with my roommate. His parents were in town from Canada, so several of us were getting together for a big group dinner. 

My plan was to meet up with them around 6pm, stay for the beginning of dinner, then head across town to Jefferson Park for a meeting around 7pm. Of course, everything took longer than usual (everyone was running 10 minutes late, then the restaurant estimated a 2 hour wait, so we decided to walk to another restaurant instead, etc.) I ended up having to call a Lyft before dinner was served to get to my 7:30 meeting on time.

As I exited my Lyft and walked to our meeting spot—the construction site of a new coffee shop—I placed my phone in my coat pocket. Except, I completely missed my coat pocket and sent my phone tumbling onto the concrete pavement.

After quickly assessing the damage (a VERY cracked screen), I successfully placed my phone into my pocket and forgot about it until an hour later as I was waiting for the train to go home.

Tiny fragments of the glass stuck to the bottom of my pocket as the screen turned vibrant colors whenever I pressed on it. I decided it was best to not use it, and once I got home, I looked up options on how to repair it.

Of course, I had just paid off my lease on the thing, making me the proud owner of a dying iPhone 6 Plus. My timing has always been impeccable.

Repair Options + Costs:

$175: Replace phone with a refurbished model using insurance

$70-125: Replace screen

Two more years of my soul: Upgrade phone and start a new lease

Yeah. Screw that. I’m going phoneless.

Why Go Phoneless?

Back in 2014, I deleted my Facebook account for about 3 months and found that it impacted daily life in a positive manner. I put more effort into communicating with friends, I wasted less time, and I was in an overall better mood.

Since then, I’ve been wanting to do a similar experiment with my smart phone, but several reasons kept me from going through with it: 1) I work in social media marketing; 2) I rely on several different apps to communicate with colleagues, friends, and family members; 3) Music is my lifeblood and how I get through long commutes; 4) My phone is my alarm clock, calendar, calculator, camera, flashlight, checkbook, transit tracker, entertainment hub, journal, notetaker, newspaper, audio recorder, [insert function here]. 

Needless to say, being without a phone is a bit... disassociating.

For the next 30 days, I will be tracking how not having a phone impacts my job, social interactions, time management skills, and overall wellbeing. At the end of each day, I’ll write up a summary on these four factors and post it here.

Privilege and iPhones

Last month, Utah Republican Jason Chaffetz criticized low-income Americans, saying that instead of spending their money on a smart phone, they should invest in a health care plan. I vehemently disagree with this statement. As a middle class American with no chronic health issues, I argue that having a smart phone has given me greater returns than health insurance.

Having a smart phone has enabled me to be responsive and manage work-related projects while out of the office. I use it as a tool to keep track of my budget and schedule, and because I work in social media marketing, communication, and live events, my phone has been a vital tool in my professional success. 

Can we live without a smart phone? Absolutely. Does having a smart phone make our lives easier? Absolutely.

The fact that I have a laptop and easy access to WIFI is why it’s possible for me to live without a smart phone for 30 days. This is a cute experiment, and I’m well aware of how much it reeks of privilege.

Perhaps examining that privilege is a larger goal of this project. We’ll see.