#pepperony moments
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Something tells me that that wasn't the most silent break down...
Totino: "Yeah, no KIDDIN'! I bet we scared ol' Peppino up there half to death- I asked you to do this to be STEALTHY, not to whack something so hard you shake the damn foundations!"
Noisette: "Connard- you give me something to hit things with and I'M GONNA HIT THINGS WITH IT! What part of that little transaction don't you understand!"
Totino: "You are simply impossible, you know that?"
Noisette: "It's part of my loveable charm, I'll have you know!"
Totino: "That loveable charm is gonna get us both KILLED, OR WORSE!"
Noisette: "Sounds like someone's jealous that he lost all of his loveable charm when h... when... c'est quoi ça???"
Totino: "Ah well! Don't you worry a hair on your head- I'll forgive you, considerin' you got the job done!"
Totino: "We'll be out of that Italian's sight in no time with a quick trip through one of these babies!"
Noisette: "WHAT."
#pepperoni tower au#secret time !!!#pizza tower au#pizza tower#main tag moment. look at my eye painting boy/ref/lh
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blah blah everything isn’t about ships blah blah BUT why have Sylki moments and a kiss if there’s a track called Lokius and then second season rolls around and suddenly the kiss is kinda retconned (or at least further enforces that it was just a distraction) but you have Sylvie being emotional after talking to Loki at a record shop but then have Mobius be the person Loki watches over—
#bruh what is going on#was sylki a mistake for the writers? did they realize lokius was more profitable? but lokius the track came before season 1 ended so no ??#or was sylki always a sibling thing and people misread??? but no say what you want but they had moments in s1#but Mobius and Loki forever had moments tooooo#bro what is even going on#say what you want about stony and pepperony but at least we knew who was really canon because it was explicitly shown to the audience#lokius#loki show#loki season 2#mobius#loki x mobius#mcu loki#mobius m mobius#loki spoilers#loki laufeyson#mobius and loki
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Apparently (according to a friend) taking all the pepperoni off a frozen pizza and reorganizing it so they're actually spread out evenly before baking is a "top ten autistic moment". Whateverrr 🙄🙄🙄🙄
#that's fair though. I understand#I dont want them overlapped or only on one side or whatever! they have to be spread out evenly! pepperoni in every bite!#he said I was right for it but also that it's going in my ''roswell top ten autistic moments'' list..... lmao#this seems normal to me. I mean I know not everyone does it but it didn't even cross my mind that it would be considered silly ajhfkshfk#said it so casually tonight. ''usually when I make pizzas I organize the pepperoni but this has other toppings so I'm not gonna. sorry''#which was followed immediately by a laugh and him saying ''new top ten autistic moment'' akhfkshfkshfmh#WHATEVEER....#I was TRYING to be CONSIDERATE and say sorry this pizza is gonna look messy instead of so neat 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄#roz posts
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...
i accidentally killed him.
...
i'm sorry snotty. maybe in another save file, i'll be snotty certified....
#pizza tower#EVEN PEPPINO IS DISAPPOINTED IN ME WHAAAAHHHH#this is a certified pizza tower moment#« pepperoni secrets
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Oni, I can’t take it, hold me.
(Always.)
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I am now full of a 2.78 pepperoni pizza combo from Sam’s club and feeling fucking decadent my guys
#was going back and forth over whether or not to buy myself lunch because I had just bought myself a sundae yesterday as a treat for making#it through the week but I hadn’t eaten today and was already at the grocery store like 50 minutes away from home so I hit the bullet and#that thing was like four pounds of cheese and pepperoni it was incredible#I think no one in this food court is savoring and luxuriating as much as I am in this moment lol#everyone go treat yourself
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I feel so cheated sometimes bc I fucking hate the taste and smell of meat (I categorize seafood as meat too) and beans
I'm Mexican-American
My Mexican mother is considered the best in the family for Mexican cuisine, everyone loves her food and I can't eat most of it
I can't eat it or smell it without wanting to gag (I don't, but I need to leave after a while to get a break)
Mexican food is considered one of the best food cultures in the world, my mother was born and raised in Jalisco and brought all the recipes she learned from her mother with her
I grew up on fast food and faster/easier recipes because she needed to put more time and effort into cooking for the rest of the family
I also grew up in Los Angeles, one of the best places in the US for authentic Mexican food. We'd go to Mexican restaurants when she didn't feel like cooking (and on one memorable occasion, a house/restaurant that was recommended to my parents at church lol), and if not Mexican restaurants, then some fast food place or seafood buffets. I stopped going out to eat with family often in my teens bc it wasn't worth taking me. I also remember being judged and just hated the experience and would make up excuses to not go
I don't know, I was on my tiktok fyp and I kept getting a lot of stuff about Mexican food and I just hate being reminded of my fucking defects so much. I didn't choose to utterly despise meat and beans and I feel so left out of my own culture. If I could eat it, I would, but I can't.
My siblings grew up on all of these amazing foods, and I grew up right alongside them, eating something else.
#at least i'll always have my taquitos de queso and tostadas con col#and my fruit or vegetable salads with lime and tajin (chamoy optional)#one time i was making myself a tofu stirfry and my uncle made a joke about how i should have been born asian#bc i love tofu and i make the occasional asian dish#and while it didn't really bother me at the moment. it just makes up one part of the collective memory in my life of food trauma#it sounds a bit extreme but i think it is a bit. i have issues with food and sometimes guard my food a bit too much bc it's mine!#you can eat whatever the fuck you want don't fucking take my food away from me!#y'know?#still thinking about that time all of the only cheese pizza was eaten and all was left was pepperoni and supreme#i almost cried#anyway just venting ig this got away from me#i will never shut up about my fucked up relationship with food and eating in front of people even family#hasan't#personal#like actually personal not just my usual personal tag#venting#self pity#mexican food#i lowkey get triggered by people who say the best way to experience culture is through food and then it's just a list of food with meat#i can't#just...i need to start eating indian food fr fr
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peperony and chease
#pizza tower#character: pepperoni goblin#character: the vigilante#also get used to these awkward snuggle moments#there's a lot
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rigby tag dump !
🦝 rigby // ic / how in the h are we gonna fix this s ? 🦝 rigby // musings / stop talking !!! 🦝 rigby // about / my pepperonis are roasting up here 🦝 rigby // likes / aesthetics / it's like barfing rainbows into my eyes 🦝 rigby // music / going to this concert could be the biggest moment of my life 🦝 rigby // starter call / did you go to medical school in the last five seconds 🦝 rigby // visage / man defaces self for prize
#🦝 rigby // ic / how in the h are we gonna fix this s ?#🦝 rigby // musings / stop talking !!!#🦝 rigby // about / my pepperonis are roasting up here#🦝 rigby // likes / aesthetics / it's like barfing rainbows into my eyes#🦝 rigby // music / going to this concert could be the biggest moment of my life#🦝 rigby // starter call / did you go to medical school in the last five seconds#🦝 rigby // visage / man defaces self for prize
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reblogging just for @little-seed's tags. i'm dying.
ritsu having the boring flavorless version of shou's favorite food is so funny to me i know every meal these two share is a nightmare. like shou and ritsu share a box of popcorn chicken and its already a little on the spicy side for ritsu but still tolerable and shou's like "man this is plain :/" and pulls out like 20 packets of chili garlic sauce from his pockets and drenches the whole thing and ritsu had already long since finished his drink so by the time they're done eating ritsu is like shaking and sweating and crying
#YES#YOU SEE MY VISION#forever hcing Ritsu as liking pepperoni pizza without the pepperoni#and ppl are like “just order cheese??”#but it's not about having plain pizza it's about having the toppings cooked in the pepperoni flavor#but the pepperoni themselves are too spicy.#His family is fine with this bc it makes ordering pizza way more convenient than having to order multiple types#and no one's gonna complain about extra pepperoni.#Ritsu has been doing this for YEARS and has a whole system down on when to peel off the pepperoni so as not#to burn his fingers or rip off all the cheese with them--but also still leave the cheese supple and warm enough to#still be enjoyable and not make the pepperoni hard to pick off from being stuck to cooled cheese.#He has a system. His family is used to this. he doesn't have friends to eat out with who have witnessed his pizza habits.#No one brings this up ever.#Enter Suzuki Shou#they eat pizza for the first time together and Shou orders a sausage for himself and a pepperoni for Ritsu bc he. Asked for pepperoni. He i#eating the pizza ta tho??? He is staring at his slice and occasionally poking it while they carry on conversation as normal#and like. Okay. Maybe it tastes funny and Ritsu's just being polite --but has he even tried it yet? No#not other than ripping off a piece of the crust which is a weird pizza behavior in its own right.#And then Ritsu starts methodically peeling and stacking the pepperoni like he's done this a million times#and Shou is not listening to the conversation anymore he is watching Ritsu#And finally when Ritsu takes his first real bite of pizza he's like “i could have ordered you cheese”#But and Ritsu can already feel the tired annoyance ready to set in while he explains but#Shou isn't looking at him like he's some smatr alec hellbent on making life more difficult for himself#He's looking at Ritsu like Ritsu must be holding some secret treasure that he wants in on. Now. and he might be willing to jump across the#table and take a bite of the pizza himself just to find out.#Suffice to say Shou takes the detailed explanation in stride and is privately thrilled to be friends with such a weirdo who will give him#his pepperoni. He also immediately wants to know if it's the same for sausage pizza but Ritsu has never tried bc#picking out sausage bits is too messy. Shou suggests using his powers WHICH. RITSU HAS NEVER THOUGHT OF BEFORE THIS MOMENT#They can't try with Shou's bc he drowns his pizza in red pepper flakes and they both agree that would probably permanently alter Ritsu#for the worst lol BUT cue their next pizza date being them picking the toppings off pizza slices for Ritsu to try.
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A guest? No no no, more of an intruder, I'd gather. They aren't supposed to be here, right? Guests are welcomed. Intruders are not.
Fakino: "Euqnuihc È? Oaic-" (Hello? Is anyone-)
Fakino: "EEP!"
???: "You- You think you can just-a BARGE INTO MY R- BARGE IN AND-A, and ATTACK ME WHILE I'M NOT-A LOOKING?!"
???: "Why... why I-a oughta to- I should just-"
???: "... Wait..."
Peppino: "You... Fakino?"
#pepperoni tower au#more to come tomorrow of these two!!!#actually yknow what im pretty proud of this one#pizza tower#main tag moments perhaps#!!!!!!
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Times Square at Night: The City That Never Sleeps Shines with Positive Energy
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#ave new york#best pizza#broadway show#city pizza#clothing toys#coal fired oven#disney merchandise pepperoni pizza#disney princess#disney store#famous original rays#fresh ingredients#fresh mozzarella#john s of times square#mickey mouse#midnight moment#ray s pizza#times square#times square arts#Times Square at Night - Urbanchats#tomato sauce#Urbanchats#york city
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𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐝 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞'𝐬 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦
↳ summary: the x-men can't seem to leave you alone, even if you've made it clear that you want nothing to do with them. as a last-ditch effort, they send logan, who's a little different than the rest
↳ notes: man writing this fucked me up. i kept editing it because i didn't like how it sounded, so some feedback would be much appreciated
↳ warnings: mentions of blowing things up in a past instance, but no one died. reader is a mutant and their powers are kept ambiguous, but it is implied they can somehow cause explosions
↳ song: promiscuous—nelly furtado
masterlist | commissions | carrd
The first time they sent someone, you had been excepting it
You weren't dumb. You knew the difference between an innocent bystander and a hired gun; or at least something along those lines. The way people walked talked and carried themselves was always a dead giveaway, and recently you had been surrounded by a few too many intense stares and stiff shoulders for your liking. A lot more than you were used to, in fact. Maybe that's what prompted you to start taking a new way home from work instead of the usual combination of cross walks and dirty bus seats.
The quick guy with silver hair was their first attempt at contact. You had found him waiting outside your apartment for you to get home all but a week after noticing the new attention on you, and you would have ignored him too if it wasn't for the fact that he was sitting on the outside your balcony, kicking his feet merrily off the side about ten stories above the pavement below without a care in the world. And with what looked like a twinkie in his hand, too.
You'd closed the blinds without a second thought, tossing him a fake grin and a little wave when he eventually turned around as you slammed them shut. You were fairly certain he could have stopped you in no time flat, if the way you would watch him zip away in the blink of an eye later said anything, but you took a heat-of-the-moment gamble and were satisfied when all your efforts got was a whine from the other side of your window pane. His mouth was too full of pre-packaged pastry to say anything in the moment, you realized
"Not interested." You called over your back as you began to retreat into your kitchen without another moments notice.
"You haven't even heard what I want!" He said thickly, clearly trying to swallow as he spoke. You must have startled him a little then. Good.
"And I don't need to."
He left a few minutes later when his one sided conversationalist skills got him no where, and you responded by throwing a frozen pizza in the lower half of your oven.
You had been craving pepperoni all day anyway.
The second person try was a bit more aggressive.
They didn't have the decency to wait for you to come home this time. Instead, you found yourself looking up from your laptop as a chair was pulled out across from you at the quaint table you sat at. It made a scraping noise, and you tensed the muscles in your hands for a moment at the sound.
"Can I help you." Your eyebrow quirked up as you looked at the woman across from you. She had blonde hair, and what you thought were the brownest eyes you had even seen. You had trouble looking anywhere but into them for a second. When they hit the light, you swore they turned yellow just for a moment, and she looked about as annoyed as you were that she was sitting by you. You didn't have to wait long to find out why.
"We've been trying to reach you." The surrounding noise of the café hardly disturbed the hard tone in her voice. "You're avoiding us."
At least this time these people had the common sense to approach you in public. If you were any form of confrontational, which you very much weren't, you could have started a fight the last time. Who knows if you would have won against super speed and whatever else the first guy had— you weren't exactly sure about the extent of his powers, and at this point didn't care —but the point remains that some damage could have been done. Now, in the middle of a coffee shop on a busy afternoon, it would be a bit harder to start a fight. Not that you were seriously concidering it. If anything, you wanted to duck into a large crowd just to loose this new recruiter, or whatever they were called. You didn't exactly know if they had a name for this type of situation.
"I have no idea who you are." Your tone matched her own, dealing out the half lie nonchalantly. You weren't technically wrong, really. You didn't know her, nor did you know that other man that had shown up before. But you knew what they wanted, and you'd be damned if they didn't pin you down without a bit of a struggle.
Moving with a speed quick enough to get your message across, but not fast enough as to alert any of the surrounding coustomers that something was up, you closed your laptop, abandoned your now lukewarm drink, and started for the door. You only paused in your movements after a weight settled over the back of your shoulder, and you carefully turned your neck to look down at the hand resting firmly on you.
"I don't recommend doing that." You said with a bit of a warning tone in your voice, looking her right in the eyes as you did so. They had since shifted from dark brown to an almost hazel shade, and you filed that information away for later use.
Her grip remained where it was for a moment. Then a thought seemed to cross her mind, and she let go of her hold on your shirt; even if a bit reluctantly.
You didn't stick around to see if anything else would happen. You just made your way out of the shop and into the bustling street, not caring if she followed. They already knew where you lived anyway.
"Taxi!!"
The final person they sent for you, you hadn't seen coming.
Every other time— from the teleporting blue kid, to the woman with white hair and fair skin, and even the tall guy in glasses that had turned a little blue when you pushed your way past him —you had been able to prepare beforehand. At the very least you were able to lock your doors before going out and about your day. You knew that wouldn't stop them in the slightest, but it was a silent message to stay out of your business.
But this guy? This guy just didn't care at all.
"You know, you're really nailing this first impression thing."
A gruff voice sprang to life at the same moment that your hallway lights did, doing a fine job at catching you off guard. You managed to not jump, but with the way the intruders lips tilted up, you figured he knew he had surprised you.
"Oh, fuck my life."
You were really not feeling like another impromptu visit tonight. You had gotten home from a rough day of work a couple of hours ago, only to realize that you had finally blown through all your food, and was once more sent back out into the city to look for a grocery store. You had been looking forward to finally resting your feet, and maybe your eyes a few hours earlier than planned, and you most certainly weren't in the right state of mind to entertain this hulking figure of a man and the proposition that came with him.
You looked at him harshly. He had muscles for days, and a brown leather jacket to accentuate just how large he was. You knew for a fact that he was a few weight classes up from the last guy that had been sent to your house, and you wondered if this was their way of trying to intimidate you into forcefully accepting their offer.
Tiny scars dotted his face and the skin on his neck. You wondered why there were so few, considering that you already knew what he did for a living, but also knew better than to question someone like him. Especially since he was already standing in the doorway to your home, looking like he owned the place.
"Go away." You didn't grant him any sort of emotion in your voice as you walked in the direction of your fridge. The plastic bags full of your food for the week swung in your arms, and for a moment you thought this new guy was going to block your way into the rest of the house before he backed off with a roll of his shoulders.
You clocked his broad chest and bruised knuckles out of the corner of your eyes as you opened the ice box and slowly placed some frozen veggies in side by side. He had either gotten here straight from a fight, or was itching for one. You figured it was probably the former considering he hadn't jumped you the second you walked through the door. Or you know, maybe he just had fucked up hands. You could never tell with people at this point.
"You're pleasant." The mans wry smile was nothing but headache educing as you finished putting the cold groceries up. You snorted with hollow amusement.
"Try being stalked for a month and a half. It really makes you feel like being hospitable."
"Try being the guy that gets sent to get in contact with you. It ain't exactly the way I wanted to be spending my Friday night either." He parroted back your words while running a hand down his face and across what you had since recognized as mutton chops in the process.
"When are you going to tell that professor of yours that I'm not interested in his little passion project." You think that might have been the first time you ever directly acknowledged what exactly was going on. Every other time you had just told the other person to get lost or slammed a door in their face to really get the point across, but the way this guy was looking at you gave you the feeling that he wouldn't be as easy to shoo away as the others, and you weren't really feeling up for a giant display of effort right about now.
"You could always tell him yourself, bub." His eyes followed your face as you crossed the room to stop in front of him, hand outstretched with something that ignited a small smirk on his face.
"Trying to bribe me?" He asked, going to take the fresh beer you offered him all the same. You shook your head.
"No. My master plan actually consists of getting you shit-faced drunk so you guys will finally leave me alone." You watched as his hand hesitated in mid-air slightly, and you misinterpreted his silent amusement at your jab for skepticism. "I've just got too much beer and a stranger in my apartment that's not going to leave me alone anytime soon, that’s all." You relented with a shrug.
"Fair enough." He took the brown bottle by the neck and popped open the top without so much as looking around for a bottle opener. When the cap went rushing to the floor less than a second later, you squinted.
"What are you then? Super strong? Or is your power alcoholism." That got a rough chuckle out of him. He swallowed about half of the bottle in one go before answering, and you sucked at your teeth as he did so.
"Something like that."
"Wow. Really feeling the comradery here." You didn't miss the way he deadpanned at that, and you figured he was thinking about all of the times you had kicked every other pursuer to the curb without even letting them get a word in edge wise. Still, you pushed on. "Remind me how its fair that you and your friends know all about me, but I have a new hero-of-the-week showing up on my doorstep every other day without so much as a clue as to what they could do to me?"
"About as fair as your little accident in Colorado." He responded without a seconds hesitation. You felt a little perspiration form on the back of your neck, and chalked it up to the lack of a.c in the room. Even if it was anything but.
"If you're here to try and convince me to join your little superhero team, I hate to tell you, but it isn't going to work. Just like it didn't work the past ten times." You ignored his last comment and made yourself comfortable on your living room couch. "Do you have a name? I've never really stuck around to talk to one of you this long before, and it's annoying to keep rendering to you as 'some guy' in my head."
He paused abruptly while drinking the beer, and you barely held back from rolling your eyes at his change in mood.
"It's Logan." He finally bit out reluctantly. You got the feeling that the only reason he told you was because he was here by request. If it has been any other circumstances, you had no doubts that he would have told you to fuck off. He gave off that energy.
"You already know mine, so I'm not gonna bother." You kicked your feet up and let your head hit the back of the couch with a sigh. "Just let me know when you finally get bored and head out. I want to make sure my landlord knows to blacklist you from the building after you're gone."
"Is this how you got everyone else to leave? By annoying them to death?" Logan sounded more entertained then you would have liked, and you blamed it on the beer.
"Depends. Is it working?"
"I've been sleeping at a school filled with screaming kids for the past few weeks. You're going to have to try harder than that to get me out of here." He took another swig.
"What will it take to get you to leave me alone. All of you." Your voice dipped out of it's usually casual tone for a more annoyed one. You were used to playing the long game when it came to getting people to leave you alone, but at this point it was getting ridiculous with the amount of people that they were throwing at you, and it was starting to wear you out. You weren't sure if Logan could tell your patience was being tested, and you weren't sure if you wanted him to.
Logan raised one eyebrow in your direction as an answer to your question, and you sighed.
"I'm not taking a stupid fucking spot on the X-Men if that's what you're implying. What do I have to do to convince you guys that I'm not up for it; blow up a building on accident or something?" The word 'again' went unsaid, but the implication was there.
You watched as Logan seemed to throw something around in his mind for a moment.
"Do you want to know why I joined the X-Men?" He eventually asked.
"Because you had nothing else to do with yourself other than styling your hair real stupid? Seriously what's with this horn thing you've got going in."
"I joined because they helped pull me off a dark path, kid." He barreled past your sarcasm, shutting you down quicker than you would like to admit. His tone was laced with something you recognized all as hatred, and you knew it wasn't directed at you, but rather himself. You knew the feeling all too well.
"I was running from something that I didn't even know I was trying to avoid." He continued. "And if it wasn't for the Professor and his 'stupid fucking team', I wouldn't have ever stopped."
For the first time in the past few minutes, you allowed one of your walls to come down as he spoke. You stared at him with a tired look lingering behind your gaze, choosing this time to listen rather than to ignore.
"I'm not running from anything." Even as you said it, you knew it was a lie. Logan didn't even have to look at you for you to sigh and lean forward again.
"I can see why the Professor wants you on the team." You felt the cushions on the opposite end of your couch dip slowly as he sat down. The now empty beer bottle was still in his hand, but as you looked over at Logan, you found his eyes filled to the brim with nothing but the honest truth.
It was a strange, tense moment. Both you and Logan could admit that. You were clearly filled with regret for your past actions, no matter how accidental they might have been, and conflicted with yourself because of it. Logan could do nothing more but watch as you battled with yourself over his words. His original plan had been to come here, show off a claw or two if needed, and bring you back to the school with a characteristic scowl on his face. But all that was thrown out the window when you offered him a beer, and when he was finally able to get a good look at you.
You looked exactly how he used to before one of his old cage matches. Detached and losing yourself. He could see it in your eyes.
The room delved into silence. You wrung your hands together and planted your feet. Logan watched as you seemed to have a silent conversation with yourself, and he began to regret not pacing himself with the beer. He wasn't anywhere near affected by the alcohol, that's to say. He just wished he had something to do other than sit in your home with squared shoulders and a furrowed brow.
"If I took one trip over to the place, would you guys let up on whatever this is?" You finally asked. Logan pushed down a faint smirk as you turned your neck to look at him.
"Sure."
You didn't say anything else, and you didn't have to. You got up without another word and grabbed a bag from a nearby closet. Logan found himself leaning on your doorframe as you stuffed a few essentials down into your travel bag in the room over, and he remained there until you finished.
"Still curious about my powers?" Logan decided to bait you just a little further as you shut the door to your apartment with a click of your keys, and he had trouble keeping a straight face when you looked back at him with curiosity dancing across your features.
Without saying anything, he held one of his hands up, and let you watch as his trademark claws popped up slowly. Like seasonal weeds in a garden full of flowers. The appendages let out a slight sliding noise as they did so, and you blinked once. Twice. Three times.
"And I thought my powers were bad." You finally said after a moment, and Logan scoffed at you.
"Kid, everyone thinks their powers are bad at first."
You seemed to take that as a challenge, and Logan watched as a bit of that fire that he'd heard about from Storm and the others flared up in you.
"Yeah? You ever accidently blow up a boiler room and take out half your high school's classes, big guy?" Your grin was all teeth as the two of you made your way down the complex hallway. Logan slowed his pace so you could keep up, and turned around so he could fully look at you as he walked backwards.
"Big guy?" He questioned you with a tilted of his head, looking about as unimpressed as he could.
"I mean yeah." You snickered. "Just look at your, well, everything." You took to gesturing at his entire being, something that got you a huff from the other man.
"Maybe you're just small." He shot back. You laughed and shook your head, looking down at yourself. Yeah right.
"And maybe I'm right, and you're just freakishly big."
Your banter continued all the way down to the elevator, where you had a hard time holding in your laughter as Logan accidentally almost stabbed the down button with his claws, apparently having forgotten that they were even out.
You couldn't help but wonder if he was always like this; if everyone at the school was like this.
Maybe going for a visit wasn't as much as a bad idea as you'd thought.
#xmen#xmen x reader#xmen x you#xmen x y/n#wolverine#logan howlett#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine x y/n#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x y/n#peter maximoff#mystique#charles xavier#x reader#one shot
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snake spotted!!
Came across Pepperoni praying to snake Jesus I assume.
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My beloved requested we get pizza tonight from the place I got fired. It’s been long enough that I’m not salty, it’s good pizza.
It was packed which wasn’t too unusual for a Friday night but the line was crawling at a super slow pace which was unusual. As we got closer we realized there was a massive table full of uncooked pizzas waiting to go in the oven. Which like, how?
We also saw they didn’t have dough pressed and ready and were frantically doing that while restocking the line with pepperoni and mushrooms.
A harried man shouted it would be at least a 30 minute wait. After a moment he added that they were hiring. It took every ounce of willpower not to shout that that I’d been fired once already but I’d go for twice.
I kept looking for a reason for this predicament. What had happened to set them so far behind? Why hadn’t they had a ton of dough pressed and ready for a Friday night? It seemed absurd that they couldn’t handle a Friday crowd.
After waiting for thirty minutes in line, we got up to order. The girl misspelled my name in the most bizarre way I’ve ever seen in the manner of someone who’s brain has moved passed stress into madness.
She didn’t have dough to make our pizzas but was gamely pressing on with taking our order when the fire alarm got pulled.
The whole restaurant had to empty and the staff looked like they were at the end of their ropes. We got outside and my beloved was ravenous. They had sat in traffic for an hour to get here from work. I kissed their face and told them I’d go pick up pizza at another location and meet them at home. They thanked me effusively and we parted. I saw the fire truck arrive as I pulled away.
When I arrived the other location was *dead*. There were only three customers. But I immediately recognized one of them as the girl who had been behind us in line at the last place. “Are you…?” I asked
“Yes. What do you want to bet they pulled that alarm themselves?”
We laughed and finally got our pizzas, drifting our separate ways after our shared unreasonably long quest for dinner.
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Lando, Sicilian Crust, Red Sauce, Pepperoni, Tomatoes, Mushrooms, Coke, Root beer, Lemonade, Sparkling Water.
But the scenario is the readers got thick thighs, and she’s a little chubby (coming from a chubby girl🥹), she’s constantly talking down on her self and insecure. And lando won’t have it, so he is desperate to make her feel better about herself. (Make sex in front of a mirror?) 
Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu
sicilian dating red sauce rough sex pepperoni "Be a good girl, and you'll get what you want" tomatoes "Do you enjoy pissing me off?" mushrooms "Wrong, wanna try again" coke spanking root beer daddy kink lemonade body worship sparkling water spitting dessert yes served by Lando Norris
AN - Omg yay! I loved getting this request as I am also a fellow chubby girl! If anyone else has plus size requests please send them in as I am passionate about wanting there to be representation for everyone <3 Lee-Lee
TW - spanking, spitting into mouth, blow job, unprotected sex, cum swallowing, some degrading terms, body worship and appreciation
WC
Y/N POV
I groan again while staring into the mirror. I knew I wasn't the ideal wag and I will never understand why Lando had picked me. The reflection in the mirror showed me a girl with thighs that touched, wide-set hips, and a belly that most people made sure to point out in the comment section of any photos released of me.
I stare a few more seconds before I start pinching at my sides trying to see how soft they had grown over the past few months. I feel the tears well in my eyes when I realize nothing is changing. I had tried dieting but then after a few weeks and a couple pounds down I find myself giving up again.
I'm so lost in my own world of self-hatred I don't hear Lando come home and I sure as hell don't hear him come into the bathroom leaving again the door frame with his arms crossed.
"Do you enjoy pissing me off?" Lando suddenly announces making me jump slightly and wrap my arms around my body to try and hide still embarrassed at being caught.
"Lando, I- I was just getting ready for the day," I lie softly not even believing myself. Lando raises a brow at me before approaching making me step back slightly. When Lando reaches me he softly removes my arms from my body just eying me up and down. I feel myself growing red in embarrassment not enjoying the feeling of his eyes on my bare body.
Wordlessly Lando takes my hips into his hands gently squeezing them before turning me towards the mirror so I can stare at myself. With Lando standing behind my I feel his arms wrapped around my hips while starting to trail his hands up and down in admiration.
"So beautiful," Lando mumbles softly placing a soft kiss on my should. I try my best to keep eye contact with Lando not wanting to see my body against his touch knowing my thighs would dwarf his wandering hands.
"I love you," Lando says softly starting to trail kisses around my shoulders and the back of my neck making my breathing pick up.
"So fucking beautiful," Lando says while pinching my hip softly before rubbing it in a soothing manner.
"Watch yourself in the mirror," Lando says roughly making my eyes instantly snap to where his hand is now wandering up my sides grazes his touch past my stomach roll before settling his hands near my face.
When his fingers graze my lips he mutters a soft beautiful before trailing his hands to my heavy tits giving them a stong squeeze making me gaso.
"These tits are gonna be the death of me one day, so fucking good," Lando says confidently giving one of my nipples a soft flick instantly making it harden.
"And this," Lando started while rubbing my stomach softly making me cringe away from his touch making him drop his hands to his sides and stare at me in the mirror.
"Wrong, wanna try again," Lando says after a moment before bringing his hands back to my stomach this time trying to relax into his touch.
"This stomach you love to pinch and probe at, will one day carry our children. That thought alone makes me hard," Lando says softly making me gasp when he grinds his jean-covered crotch into my thick ass letting me know just the sight of me turned him on.
"I wish you could see yourself through my eyes," Lando adds softly moving his hands down to my thighs giving them a soft rub before landing a soft slap on them making me whine.
"And these fucking thighs! My favorite thing in the world. After a good race, I just wanna burry my face between them, after a bad race I can't wait to get back to the hotel to hide between them and let all my problems away, these are the best thing the Lord could have blessed me with," Lando says softly while rubbing them. He was back to laying soft kisses around my neck before I feel his teeth sink into the side of my neck before leaving a small hickey.
"Oh! And this fucking pussy," Lando says softly digging his fingers through my folds finding them to be coated in a light layer of my juices. Having Lando softly rubbing his hands around my body had definitely turned me on a bit.
"This pussy and the best pussy a man could have. Too bad I will never share it again," Lando says softly before lifting my thigh and resting my foot on the counter so he can burry his fingers into my pussy making me gasp and throw my head back onto Lando's shoulder when he hits my G-spot.
"Feels so good," I whine softly clenching around Lando's fingers before they're ripped out of my pussy leaving me gasping for a breath,
"No daddy," I whine not wanting him to stop.
"Be a good girl, and you'll get what you want. Count them for me," Lando says roughly letting me know he was about to spank me.
The first slap rang out through the room startling me just a bit.
"one" i mumble softly.
"two" I groan a little louder after the second much harsher slap landed on my left ass cheek.
"I love the way your ass shakes when I slap it," Lando said before landing another rough slap on the exact same spot making me scream out softly.
"three," I finally gasp out still trying to catch my breath.
"four," I scream out with the fourth slap lands on the top of my right ass cheek.
"Last one," Lando says softly while rubbing his hand over the last spank he had landed.
"Five, oh my god," I scream while my knees buckle only staying up because of Lando's strong grip. The last one was always the hardest one but today it was so much harder than normal. It knocked the wind out of me in shock.
"Did so good for me. Took your punishment so well baby," Lando says softly turning me around to give me a soft kiss.
"Open," lando says roughly cleaning moving from punishment mode to 'I ned to fuck you right now' mode.
When I part my lips and open my mouth I wait as Lando gather s a bit of spit before spitting right down my throat some hitting my bottom lip making me moan before swallowing.
"Good girl," Lando says before flipping me back to look at myself in the mirror again. Lando was still fully dressed which changed rather quickly cause he started stripping down not having any time to waste.
When I feel Lando poking at my folds I moan softly while pushing my hips back trying to get some kind of stimulation which finally came when Lando roughly sunk down fully into me.
"Oh god," I moan out when his hips hit my sore ass making the the slight burning sensation instantly turn from pain to pleasure.
“It’s too much, daddy,” I moan when Lando speeds up his thrusting making me grip onto the counter harder to make sure I don’t fall.
“Watch the mirror, I want you to see how beautiful you are,” Lando grunts while reaching between our bodies to find my swollen clit to give it a few pinches before rubbing it in circles.
“God, you have the wettest fucking pussy, baby girl,” Lando groans collectiving some on his fingers before bringing his wet fingers to his mouth and cleaning them off while moaning at the flavor.
“You’re fucking delicious baby,” Lando whispers while bringing his fingers back to my clit making me instantly tense around Lando’s cock in anticipation of an orgasm.
“Can I cum,” I moan feeling my orgasm approaching making Lando speed up his actions, and throwing me off the edge and into a knee buckling orgasm as soon as he have me the go ahead.
“Fuck daddy,” I scream out as I feel the peak of my orgasm hit, making the world around me go dark slightly letting my body feel all of the pleasure coursing through my body. Lando helps me ride out the longest orgasm I’ve ever had before softly slipping out of my pussy making me whine from overstimulation.
“On you knees,” Lando grunts making me turn around and drop to my knees and instantly reach for his cock but he pulls away while shaking his head.
“I need you to listen to me real quick,” Lando says making me nod and trail my eyes from his soaked cock up to his eyes to show he has my full attention.
“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. You have been my best friend our entire relationship and I have loved every aspect of who you are. So I’ll be damned if you hate even the smallest speck on yourself when all I can ever fucking see is perfection,” Lando tells me softly making me smile back at him.
“It’s just hard sometimes. I see the girls who would do anything for even a second of your times. I see the other wags and can’t help but compare. And i see the comments, i know you see them too and while even if I was skinny they would still find a reason to be dicks it’s just hard sometimes,” I tell him softly making him scoff each time I compared myself to someone else but watched as his eyes softened at the mention of the comments.
“All Im saying is I better not come back home to find you pinching your sides or damn near in tears at the sight you see in the mirror,” Lando says back making me nod my head.
“Daddy can I please finish you off now,” I whine getting impatient with staring at his hard cock. Lando just chuckles before stepping closer and leaning down slightly to spit in my mouth again. I savor the flavor this time before swallowing his spit.
When I open my mouth again Lando instantly shoves his cock down my throat making me gag slightly.
“Prettiest fucking slut Ive ever laid eyes on.” Lando groans still on his complimenting run but too lost in the pleasure to not throw in some teasing nicknames.
I feel Lando’s pace start to falter which makes me bob my head faster wanting to keep the same momentum as he starts cumming down my throat.
I do my best to swallow every drop he gives me before he’s slowly pulling out if my mouth. I feel a bit of cum leak down the side of my lips and before I can wipe it away Lando is crashing his lips onto mine now caring about the cum.
“I love you so much! Be nice to yourself,” Lando tells me softly making me nod my head in agreement.
When Lando helps me from the cold ground he draws us a bath. When we both sink into the hot water I can see the stress of the day melt away for Labdo while I i feel all my tense muscles slowly start to relax.
“What triggered it?” Lando asked softly.
“I was getting ready to take a shower and kinda got lost,” i replied back softly making Lando wrap his arms around me a little tighter.
“M’sorry I wasn’t here early to prevent it,” he tells me while leaning down to place a soft kiss on my cheek.
“Wasnt your fault,” I reply back shrugging a little. We both know I would do it again but I also knew it didn’t matter to Lando cause I was always gonna be his girl.
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