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writingsoftarnishedsilver · 12 days ago

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Through Her Eyes | Sebastian Sallow x OC #8

seb is really out here ruining all my fluff with angst

Summary: In a Halloween-themed celebration for Sebastian's birthday, his friends, led by Evangeline, prepare a surprise party in the Room of Requirement. Despite the fun and warmth of the night, Sebastian’s unspoken feelings for Evangeline become complicated by jealousy over her relationship with Lysander.

Words: 6,931

Tags: Halloween Birthday Party, Spin The Bottle, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Memory Vial, Pensieve Gift, Friends To Lovers, Slow Burn, Bittersweets, Longing, Jealousy, Unspoken Feelings, Love Triangle

Read more stories about Sebastian and Evangeline

The Room of Requirement hummed with excitement, alive with floating jack-o'-lanterns, enchanted pumpkins with toothy grins, and flickering candles casting ghostly shadows along the walls draped in cobwebs. Evangeline adjusted a crooked pumpkin on one of the tables, her eyes sparkling with anticipation as she watched her friends milling about, preparing the final touches for the party. She glanced over at Ominis, who was busy fiddling with the floating candles, their dim lights casting a warm glow over his determined face.

The rest of their friends were scattered across the room, each in a creative costume and contributing to the spooky setup in their own way. Garreth was dressed as a dashing pirate, eye patch included, and had filled the punch bowl with one of his experimental potions that emitted a faint mist and sparkled with swirling colors. Leander, meanwhile, had chosen to be a muggle detective, complete with a comically oversized magnifying glass, which he was using to inspect the decorations with an exaggerated air of seriousness, much to everyone’s amusement.

“Do you think Sebastian’ll actually wear a costume?” Evangeline asked, hiding a smile as she adjusted the black lace mask over her eyes.

Ominis smirked, a glint of amusement flickering across his usually calm face. "Oh, he’ll wear one. I told him it was mandatory."

Natty and Cressida were at one of the tables near the door, arranging an array of snacks, each enchanted with small charms that made the treats wobble, glow, or emit faint, amusing noises. Natty, dressed as a lioness, was laughing at the enchanted pastries every time they tried to escape their plate, while Cressida, dressed in a shimmering fairy costume with wings that twitched every so often, laughed at the display.

“Honestly, this might be one of our best setups yet,” Imelda commented from her perch on a table, where she was setting up a bowl of sweets to jinx anyone who tried to take too many. Dressed as a vampire, with fangs glinting in the candlelight, she looked at the enchanted treats with an almost predatory gleam in her eyes.

Nearby, Violet, decked out in full ghostly attire with shimmering gauzy fabric flowing around her, adjusted the lighting charms to dim the corners of the room, making the jack-o'-lanterns’ grins appear even more sinister. “I think it’s wonderful that we’re doing this for him,” she murmured, her gaze softening as she glanced around the room. “Knowing Sebastian, he’ll probably act all nonchalant, but I think he’ll appreciate it.”

As the final touches came together, Evangeline took a step back to take in the scene. Floating candles cast a dim, warm light over her friends, all of whom were now gathered around, beaming and admiring their hard work. Everyone was dressed in full costume, looking both ridiculous and wonderful, the festive energy filling the room with an almost tangible warmth.

"Alright, places, everyone!" Poppy, dressed as a mischievous goblin, announced as she positioned herself near the door. "He’ll be here any moment, thanks to Ominis’ perfectly vague instructions.”

Evangeline tugged at the edges of her costume as she joined her friends, smoothing the fabric as her eyes darted toward the door. She couldn’t shake the slight twist of nerves in her chest, knowing this surprise might stir up bittersweet memories for Sebastian. The party was as much for him as it was for her friends, who had all wanted to show him a night filled with warmth and laughter instead of the quiet sadness he usually wore on his birthday.

A few muffled footsteps echoed from the hallway, and the group held their breath, still as statues as the doorknob turned. A moment later, the door swung open, and there stood Sebastian, his brow furrowed, eyes narrowing as he took in the dark, glowing room. He was dressed in a sly-looking devil costume, complete with dark horns and a grin that looked both amused and curious.

“SURPRISE!” the entire group yelled, bursting into applause and cheers as Sebastian froze in the doorway, clearly stunned. His smirk faltered, surprise flickering over his face as he looked at the assembled group, each one grinning back at him from behind ridiculous masks, wings, and cloaks.

“Alright,” he finally said, a genuine smile breaking through his surprise, “I did not see that coming.”

“Good, because it’s nearly impossible to surprise you,” Evangeline laughed, stepping forward to meet him. “Welcome to your Halloween birthday bash!”

Sebastian looked at her, his expression softening before he scanned the room, taking in the decorations—the enchanted pumpkins and cobwebs glimmering, the punch bowl swirling with mist, and the assortment of sweets and cakes practically alive with charms. The flicker of sadness that usually haunted his gaze on his birthday seemed to fade just slightly, replaced by a look of warmth.

“It’s brilliant,” he murmured, “Thank you, all of you.”

In no time, the party slipped into an excitable rhythm, laughter and music filling the air as their friends drifted from one group to another, each corner of the room brimming with life. Sebastian was pulled into a dance with Imelda, who twirled him around with surprising strength, making everyone cheer. Natty and Cressida performed a duet of exaggerated ghostly wails that had the room in stitches, while Garreth enchanted the punch to glow a haunting green, daring everyone to taste it.

In an instant, the enchanted punch was a hit, with misty tendrils swirling in the air above their cups, and each sip left them feeling light and a little bolder. Sebastian, typically reserved on his birthday, found himself laughing and enjoying the evening, the usual melancholy of the day replaced by the warmth and energy of his friends.

Evangeline watched as he moved through the room, bantering with Garreth over the potion he’d put in the punch, teasing Natty about her lioness costume, and even joining Poppy in a playful dance when she grabbed his hand and spun him around. The sight warmed her heart, and she couldn’t help but smile, knowing he was able to lose himself in the moment. Tonight, he looked truly carefree, the weight he usually carried absent, if only for a while.

As the night wore on and the drinks flowed freely, Leander clinked his cup for attention, an impish grin spreading across his face. “Alright, alright! I’ve got an idea to make this night even more… interesting,” he announced, holding up a bottle he’d procured from Garreth’s stash. “Let’s play spin the bottle!”

A wave of laughter, gasps, and protests erupted. Some of the group exchanged looks, while others leaned forward with immediate interest.

“Oh, Merlin, this again?” Sebastian scoffed, crossing his arms with a dubious look. He glanced around the circle, his gaze briefly catching Evangeline’s before he quickly looked away, his expression guarded.

Garreth raised an eyebrow, egging him on. “What, Sallow? You scared?”

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Please, I’m not scared. Just seems like a ridiculous game,” he muttered, though his arms remained firmly crossed, a hint of tension in his stance.

Evangeline shifted nervously beside her friends, who were all stifling knowing smiles. Natty nudged her with an encouraging grin, whispering, “Come on, Evie, it’s just a game.”

Evangeline forced a smile, her heart racing as she considered it. Her friends, especially Ominis, were well aware of her feelings for Sebastian, and she knew they’d be watching closely. She stole a quick glance at Sebastian, who was still resisting, though his eyes held a flicker of something… apprehensive. The thought made her pulse quicken.

She took a deep breath, fingers nervously twisting at the hem of her sleeve. This was supposed to be fun, and everyone else seemed unfazed. But her mind was racing. If she ended up having to kiss Sebastian—her heart leaped at the thought—and yet, the idea terrified her just as much as it thrilled her. She knew her friends would be watching, waiting for the moment they all knew she secretly hoped for.

“Oh, come on, it’s just a bit of fun!” Garreth grinned mischievously, giving Sebastian a look. “It’s nearly Halloween, it’s your birthday—don’t be a coward.”

Leander smirked, holding the bottle out with an air of challenge. “You can sit this out, Sallow, but everyone else is joining in.”

Sebastian hesitated, his expression wavering between annoyance and something that looked suspiciously like fear. Finally, with a resigned sigh, he dropped down into the forming circle, muttering, “Fine."

Evangeline’s heart stuttered as she found herself joining the circle too, each movement filled with anticipation. Her friends exchanged knowing glances, barely able to contain their excitement. Ominis sat quietly, though she knew he was well aware of her nerves, and his faint smirk told her he’d likely enjoy watching this play out.

Garreth reached out and the bottle whirled around the circle, gleaming as it caught the candlelight, and Evangeline held her breath, hoping she wouldn’t end up on the spot too soon.

Eventually, it slowed to a stop, pointing at Violet. Laughter erupted as Garreth, dressed in his pirate costume, exaggerated a swooning look, clutching his chest dramatically before leaning over to plant a peck on Violet’s lips. She rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide the smile tugging at her lips. “Such charm, Weasley,” she teased, pushing him back with a playful shove.

Next, Natty’s turn came, and the bottle pointed at Amit, who fidgeted nervously, adjusting his glasses as Natty gave him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, Amit,” she said with a soft laugh, leaning in to give him a quick, friendly kiss. Amit turned a shade of red that matched Garreth’s pirate bandana, prompting a round of applause and good-natured teasing from the circle.

When Imelda spun, the bottle landed on Leander, who gave a confident smirk. Imelda rolled her eyes but leaned in, placing a quick peck on his lips. “Don’t let it go to your head, Prewett,” she muttered, and Leander grinned as if he’d just won a Quidditch match.

Cressida’s spin landed her with Poppy, and they both burst into laughter, leaning in for a quick, exaggerated kiss that left everyone whistling and hollering in excitement.

Evangeline’s nerves grew with each spin, a mix of excitement and anxiety churning in her stomach. She tried to stay calm, laughing along with her friends, but every time the bottle inched close to her, her heart raced faster.

Ominis reached for the bottle, giving it a casual flick with his wrist. The bottle spun around, glinting in the dim light as it slowed and finally landed on Adelaide. Evangeline noticed a brief flicker of hesitation in Ominis’s expression—so subtle that most would have missed it. But she saw it, the barely perceptible tightening of his jaw, the slight shift in his posture.

Still, he leaned in, his expression calm, and gave Adelaide a quick, polite kiss. Adelaide blushed, looking both surprised and pleased, while Ominis leaned back with a slight smile, though Evangeline could tell his heart wasn’t in it.

Her heart gave a strange, empathetic pang, recognizing that Ominis, too, had someone on his mind. And from Evie could tell, it wasn't Adelaide.

Finally, it was Sebastian’s turn, and Evangeline could sense Ominis casting her a knowing glance, his lips twitching with a barely concealed smirk. Her heart raced, and she barely registered the chatter around her as Sebastian reached for the bottle with an exaggerated, reluctant sigh.

“Oh, go on, Sallow,” Garreth teased, elbowing him. “Don’t look so grim."

Sebastian huffed, shooting Garreth a mock glare, but Evangeline didn’t miss the way his hand hesitated for just a split second before spinning the bottle. He gave it a flick, and they all watched as it whirled around, catching flickers of candlelight in the dim room, casting fleeting sparks across the faces gathered around the circle.

The bottle slowed, its pace dwindling as it spun closer and closer toward her. Evangeline felt every inch of its rotation like the beat of a drum in her chest, each flicker of candlelight off the glass holding her captive. And then, finally, it landed on her. The air seemed to vanish from the room as a hush fell over the circle, and her heart leapt—this could be it.

She was in love with him, and had been for over a year. She’d spent countless nights dreaming about this moment, the moment he might look at her and truly see her, might kiss her and let his walls down. And now, here it was, all because of a silly, ridiculous game that might change everything. Her pulse quickened, her breath hitching in anticipation as she met his familiar gaze, heart pounding with a mixture of excitement, fear, and desperate hope.

The room seemed to hum with energy, her friends holding their breaths as they watched the two of them, expressions full of unspoken excitement. She could feel the collective thrill and anticipation around them, her friends barely containing their glee that, at long last, something might happen.

But when she looked at Sebastian, her heart sank. He looked… taken aback. The usual mischief was gone from his eyes, replaced with an almost startled expression, his lips pressed together in a thin line. A flicker of something like hesitation crossed his face, and he glanced around the circle as if searching for an escape. She felt her heart drop, the warmth in her chest replaced by a sudden chill. He didn’t want this, she realized with a painful certainty.

He didn’t want to kiss her.

Her cheeks warmed as he leaned in, but she knew, deep down, this wasn’t going to be what she had imagined. He was close enough now that she could smell the faint hint of spice and autumn leaves that clung to him after a day spent outside. Her eyes fluttered shut, steeling herself for the feel of his lips, bracing for the kiss she had longed for. Just once. Just one kiss.

But as his breath ghosted over her skin, he shifted at the last second, pressing a soft, polite kiss to her cheek instead. His hand rested briefly on her shoulder, but it was a gesture so fleeting it might have never been there at all. He pulled back just as quickly, and her heart clenched painfully, the moment slipping away like sand through her fingers. The warmth she’d hoped for, the magic she’d dreamed of… it wasn’t there.

Around them, her friends exchanged bewildered glances, their expressions a mixture of confusion and pity as they watched Sebastian pull away, his face a mask of casual indifference. No one said a word, but the silence spoke volumes. The unspoken rules of the game had been broken, and everyone knew it. She swallowed the ache, her forced smile trembling at the edges as she tried to mask the disappointment that pooled in her chest like ice.

Sebastian gave an awkward chuckle, shrugging it off as if nothing had happened while the group of friends glanced at each other again, their confusion thick in the air, but the game went on, the bottle spinning to the next person.

Evangeline barely registered it, the lighthearted chatter and laughter around her fading into a distant hum. Her heart felt heavy, hollowed out, as though something precious had been taken and she hadn’t been quick enough to hold onto it. Across the circle, Ominis caught her gaze, his expression soft with sympathy, and she could see in his eyes that he knew exactly how she felt. He gave her a slight, understanding nod, his silent presence a small comfort amid the ache.

The night continued on—the Room of Requirement filled with laughing faces, swirling lights, and the vibrant music. But Sebastian couldn’t focus. His mind kept looping back to that moment, that one breathless second when the bottle had landed on her. Evangeline. The warmth of her cheeks, the way her eyes had softened as she looked at him. And he’d ruined it. He’d wanted to kiss her, Merlin, he’d wanted to.

The moment the bottle landed on her, his heart had skipped a beat, a reckless thrill racing through him at the thought. He’d barely let himself hope he’d have a moment like that with her, and now, having had it, he couldn’t believe he’d let it slip away. But as much as he wanted it—wanted her—he’d held back.

Because if he kissed her, he feared he’d never be able to go back to the way things were. He’d be left with nothing but the hollow ache of knowing what it felt like to hold her, to taste the possibility that had lingered between them for so long. And a kiss in a game, under the teasing gazes of their friends, wasn’t how he wanted it. Not for her, and not for himself.

As the party drifted into late evening and Garreth’s punch had made more than a few rounds, Sebastian felt the effects, his usual defenses slipping with each drink. He found himself withdrawing from the noise, letting the crowd drift past him as he walked toward a quiet alcove. The dim light from the enchanted candles flickered across the room, and he stood alone, looking out over the scene, the bittersweet mix of celebration and longing simmering within him.

He barely noticed her approach until she was beside him, her soft steps barely audible over the distant laughter. “Sebastian,” she said quietly, her voice like a balm, both soothing and unsettling. She leaned against the stone wall beside him, her gaze following his out over the crowd.

For a while, neither of them spoke, and he wondered what she might be thinking about as they stood there together, cloaked in the soft glow of the enchanted candles. He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, taking in the familiar lines of her face, the way her hazel gaze softened as she watched their friends laughing and dancing in the distance. Did she feel the same pull—the same magnetic tension that he struggled against every time they were together? He wondered if maybe a part of her had wanted him to kiss her just as much as he had. The thought both thrilled and terrified him.

Evangeline eventually spoke, her expression both pensive and slightly wistful. “Having fun?"

Sebastian let out a quiet laugh, one that felt forced. “Yeah,” he replied, his gaze drifting over the crowd of their friends, their laughter and movement casting shadows against the flickering candlelight. “It’s… better than I expected, actually.” He turned to her, searching her face. “What about you?”

She gave him a small smile, though there was something guarded in her eyes. “It’s been lovely. It means a lot, you know… to see you happy.” Her gaze softened as she looked at him, and for a fleeting moment, he thought he saw something there—something that mirrored the turmoil inside him.

The words nearly caught in his throat, but he forced them out anyway, trying to sound casual. “Well, thanks to you and Ominis, I suppose,” he said, his voice quieter. “You two really went all out.”

Evangeline looked down, brushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “You deserve it. I know birthdays haven’t been… easy for you since Anne got sick,” she said softly, her voice laced with understanding.

For a moment, Sebastian was at a loss for words. He wanted to reach out, to close the small space between them and tell her how much that meant to him, how much she meant to him. But instead, he only managed a soft, “Thank you.”

A comfortable silence fell between them as they watched the party from their secluded corner, a strange mix of longing and contentment settling over him. It was a rare, fragile moment—one that felt painfully perfect in its simplicity. He could almost forget the ache in his chest, the words he was too afraid to say.

After a moment, Evangeline’s voice broke the quiet. “Do you ever think about… what comes after all this? After Hogwarts?”

Sebastian’s gaze flickered over to her, surprised by the question. “Sometimes,” he admitted, leaning back against the wall. “It’s strange to think about life beyond these walls, isn’t it? There’s so much out there, but… I don’t know what it looks like without all of this. Without… us.”

Evangeline’s lips curved into a faint smile, her gaze drifting thoughtfully over the room. “Yeah,” she murmured, a wistfulness in her tone. “It’s hard to picture what comes next,” She paused, her fingers tracing patterns along the edge of her costume sleeve, as if searching for the right words. “Sometimes, I wonder if what we went through was supposed to give us answers. To help us figure out who we are… what we want.”

Sebastian studied her, his gaze softened with an empathy he rarely showed. “And did it?” he asked gently. “Give you those answers?”

She hesitated, a flicker of uncertainty crossing her face. “Not exactly.” Her voice grew softer. “Sometimes, I think about Professor Fig, the repository… everything we went through. It changed so much, and sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing, if not taking the power was the best choice.” She sighed, her voice barely above a whisper. “And what that choice says about me.”

Sebastian’s heart twisted, the weight of her uncertainty settling over him. He reached out, his hand brushing against her arm in a soft, reassuring touch. “Evie, you made the choice because it was right. Because you’re good.” His voice softened, each word laced with a quiet intensity. “Not many people would be able to choose what’s right over what’s… tempting.”

Her eyes met his, filled with an almost vulnerable openness. “I thought it would make things easier, knowing I’d done the right thing. But it’s just…” She let out a soft sigh, her gaze shifting as she struggled to put her feelings into words. "I worry about what might happen when I'm not here anymore. Not near Hogwarts to protect it. To keep it safe, I suppose.”

Sebastian’s heart tightened, and he moved his hand from her arm to gently clasp her hand, grounding her with his touch. “Evie, listen to me,” he said, his voice steady. “You did everything you could. More than anyone else could have. And Hogwarts… it’ll stand because of you. You’re leaving it better than it was.” He paused, searching her face, his own expression softening. “You’re leaving all of us better than we were.”

Evangeline’s eyes shone, her resolve wavering just slightly as she absorbed his words. “I hope so,” she murmured, a faint smile tugging at her lips.

They stood there, her hand still in his, and for a brief moment, the world outside of this quiet corner fell away. He could feel her warmth, steadying him, grounding him in a way nothing else could. It was moments like these that reminded him why he held back earlier. How could he risk losing this—their closeness, this fragile understanding that neither of them dared to put into words?

Evangeline looked down at their entwined hands, a slight blush creeping into her cheeks. She bit her lip, "Follow me."

Sebastian’s heart raced as he followed Evangeline out of the Room of Requirement, the warmth of her hand lingering even after she let go. The castle corridors were shrouded in darkness, only faintly illuminated by the flickering light of torches as they passed.

It was well past curfew, but they slipped through the halls with ease, their countless nights of sneaking out together having made them experts in the art of silent movement through the castle’s winding corridors.

Sebastian could feel his pulse thrumming in his veins, his thoughts tangled with possibilities, as they finally reached the entrance to the Gryffindor common room.

When they stopped, Evangeline turned to him with a slight smile, her face illuminated by the faint glow of torchlight. “Wait here,” she whispered, her eyes sparkling with a mysterious warmth. Before he could say anything, she disappeared through the portrait hole, leaving him alone in the dim hallway.

Sebastian’s heart raced, and he shifted his weight, glancing around as he waited.

He was left alone with his thoughts, with the lingering warmth of her hand, and the sharp, unmistakable realization of just how much she meant to him.

After a few minutes, the portrait swung open again, and Evangeline emerged, holding two small packages in her hands. She paused, her gaze softening as she looked at him, and then she held out a simple, neatly wrapped parcel.

“This one’s from Anne,” she said gently, her voice laced with an understanding that only she could offer. “She sent it to me last week, asked me to hold onto it for you until today.”

Sebastian swallowed, the sight of the package stirring a bittersweet ache within him. He took it carefully, his fingers grazing hers as he did. “Thank you, Evie,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. He could feel the weight of Anne’s gift in his hands—a reminder of the family he missed, of the ties that had once been his whole world.

With reverence, Sebastian carefully pulled away the wrapping on Anne's gift, revealing a small, weathered pocket watch. His breath hitched, a wave of emotion striking him as he turned it over in his hands. It was his father’s—a family heirloom he'd thought lost long ago. The polished silver face was engraved with his father’s initials and the date he’d received it, his own birthday, from years before. The watch was slightly scuffed, well-loved, and just seeing it again brought back memories of his father winding it each morning, the ticking sound that had once been as familiar to him as his own heartbeat.

He ran his fingers over the engraving, his gaze fixed on the worn, intricate details, and a knot of both longing and gratitude tightened in his chest. "I… I can’t believe she found this." Sebastian murmured, "It... used to be my father's."

Evangeline’s eyes softened, "In her letter she said she thought it was time you had it,” she stepped closer, her hand resting lightly on his arm. “That it would mean something for you to carry a part of him with you.”

Sebastian’s grip on the watch tightened as he looked down at it, unable to speak for a moment. There was a bittersweet comfort in holding it, knowing that Anne had thought of him enough to pass it along despite everything that had happened. And then there was Evangeline, standing here, offering a quiet reassurance that felt as necessary as the gift itself.

Slowly, he tucked the watch into the inner pocket of his robe, close to his heart, and turned back to her. "Thank you for holding onto it for me. And for Anne."

Evangeline’s gaze held his, her lips curving into a gentle smile. “You don’t need to thank me."

He looked down, letting the moment wash over him before he turned his attention to the second package Evangeline held. It was slightly larger, wrapped with a bit more care, a delicate ribbon tied around it.

“And this one?” he asked quietly, a hint of curiosity in his voice.

Evangeline smiled, her cheeks pink as she offered it to him. “This one’s from me. I… wanted to give it to you in a moment just between us.”

Sebastian took the package slowly, his heart pounding as he felt her words sink in. “Just between us,” he repeated softly, the warmth of her gaze settling over him.

Sebastian’s fingers traced the edge of her package, carefully untying the delicate ribbon and peeling back the wrapping. Inside, he found a small, elegant vial, its glass shimmering faintly with a hint of opalescent light. Within the vial swirled a silvery, ethereal substance—a memory. He stared at it, momentarily at a loss, glancing up at her with a questioning look.

Evangeline smiled, her eyes warm and a little shy. “It’s a memory,” she explained softly, her voice barely more than a murmur. “One we share. A moment I… wanted to make sure neither of us forget.”

The significance of the gift settled over him, his heart pounding as he held the vial with a reverence he hadn’t felt in a long time. “Evie,” he breathed, almost unable to process the sentiment, the meaning behind such a gift. “You… bottled a memory for me?”

Her blush deepened, and she gave a soft laugh, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “I know it’s a bit sentimental,” she admitted, “but… it means a lot to me.” She cleared her throat, attempting a more casual tone. “And, of course, that’s not the entire gift. I… ordered a Pensieve to go with it. It should have arrived already, but it got delayed in the post.” She gave him an apologetic shrug. “I suppose I got a bit ahead of myself with the idea.”

A smile tugged at Sebastian’s lips as he absorbed her words, his heart swelling with something he couldn’t quite name. The gift—this memory, preserved so carefully for him—was like a piece of her, a part of her heart offered with trust he hadn’t known he’d been longing for.

“It’s perfect,” he murmured, his gaze steady and unguarded as he looked at her. “Really, Evie. I don’t know what to say.” He wanted to reach out, to pull her close and let her know just how much this gift meant, how much she meant to him. But instead, he only tightened his grip on the vial, feeling the smooth glass cool against his fingers, grounding him.

“What memory did you…” he hesitated, feeling suddenly vulnerable for even asking. “What memory did you choose?”

Evangeline’s smile softened, "If I told you, that'd ruin the surprise, Sebastian."

Sebastian swallowed her words, the mystery in her eyes drawing him deeper into a tangled knot of emotions he couldn’t shake. The vial in his hand felt fragile, precious, and he clung to it, heart swelling with a bittersweet ache. He’d never been given anything quite like this before—something so carefully thought out, a piece of her she’d chosen to share with him. And the knowledge that it would forever be theirs, just the two of them, made him feel both elated and painfully aware of the line he could never seem to cross.

They continued to talk in quiet tones, laughing softly at shared memories, his heart racing with each glance she gave him. But despite the warmth in her eyes, the easy familiarity between them, a darker thought began to creep in, unbidden and relentless. Tonight was special, yes, but it also served as a harsh reminder of the boundaries that lay between them. And when he saw her with Lysander—saw how comfortable, how uncomplicated it was—he felt that knot of jealousy tighten in his chest.

The memory of Lysander’s easy smile, the way Evangeline seemed to shine with confidence around him, flashed in Sebastian’s mind, and he couldn’t keep his thoughts from spiraling. He knew Lysander was everything he wasn’t—steady, dependable, someone who could offer her a life free of turmoil. And now, with her standing here, giving him a gift so intimate, so meaningful, he could barely stand the thought of sharing even a sliver of her attention with someone else.

Sebastian clenched his jaw, trying to keep his frustration in check, but the words slipped out before he could stop them. “I’m surprised Clearwater hasn't come looking for you; it's a Friday night afterall."

Evangeline chuckled awkwardly, "I mean, it's your birthday Sebastian. I told Lysander I would be unavailable."

Sebastian’s heart twisted at her words. The knowledge that she was here, that she’d chosen to spend his birthday with him, should have been enough to ease his insecurities, but the thought that Lysander had become such a natural part of her life, someone she felt the need to keep informed, burned under his skin, jealousy tightening in his chest despite himself.

He forced a smirk, trying to mask the turmoil inside. “How noble of him,” he muttered, “Allowing you to spend one night away from his constant attention.”

Evangeline’s smile faltered, the light in her eyes dimming as she looked at him, a hint of hurt flickering across her face. “Sebastian,” she said softly, her tone cautious, as if trying to gauge his mood. “You know it’s not like that. Lysander… he doesn’t expect me to choose between him and my friends.”

The words stung, hitting a raw nerve he hadn’t expected. “Well, isn’t he perfect?” he muttered, bitterness seeping through despite himself. “I’m glad he’s so understanding.”

Evangeline’s face fell, her brows knitting together as she searched his expression, clearly taken aback. “Why are you saying this?"

The question struck him, soft and pleading, pulling him back from the edge of his frustration. Her gaze held a flicker of confusion and hurt, and for a moment, he hated himself for ruining this—this quiet, intimate moment she’d created just for him. But he couldn't stop, the words spilling out before he could stop himself.

“Because it bothers me, Evie,” He raked a hand through his hair, glancing away from her, unable to meet her eyes. “It bothers me that you’re practically attached at the hip with Clearwater these days. That you’re not making time for us, for your friends.”

Even as he said it, Sebastian knew it wasn’t true—not entirely. She was still here, wasn’t she? She’d chosen to spend his birthday with him instead of Lysander, even bringing him a gift that had clearly taken thought and effort. But his jealousy demanded an outlet, and this excuse—this flimsy, ridiculous excuse—was the only shield he could throw up to protect himself from admitting the truth.

Evangeline blinked, her brow furrowing in confusion. “What are you talking about?” she asked, her voice soft but tinged with disbelief. “Sebastian, I see you all the time. Just because I’m with Lysander doesn’t mean I’ve abandoned anyone.”

He forced a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “Could’ve fooled me,” he muttered, his voice laced with a sarcasm that felt more like a defense mechanism than genuine anger. “Lately, it feels like he gets the best of you, and the rest of us just… get whatever’s left over.”

Her expression faltered, a flicker of hurt crossing her face. “That’s not fair,” she said quietly, stepping closer. “You know that’s not true. I’ve been trying to balance everything—”

“Balance?” he interrupted, the word tasting sour as he said it. He didn’t even know what he was arguing anymore, only that the knot in his chest kept tightening. “Sure, Evie. Balance. If that’s what you call it.”

She shook her head slowly, her voice soft but hurt. “So, what? You think I should just… what, stop seeing Lysander to make you feel better?"

The hurt in her voice cut through his anger, leaving him feeling hollow and ashamed, but he still couldn’t bring himself to say what he wanted, what he really felt. Instead, he looked away, his jaw tight, unwilling to let her see the vulnerability in his eyes.

Evangeline waited for a moment, as if hoping he might say something, anything, to take back his words. But when he didn’t, her shoulders slumped, and she nodded, resignation settling over her.

“Fine,” she whispered, the warmth in her voice replaced by a quiet sadness. “Goodnight, Sebastian.”

With that, she turned and walked back to the portrait hole, disappearing into the Gryffindor common room without looking back. ________________

It was about a week later when Sebastian received the pensieve Evie had sent him. The package arrived during breakfast in the Great Hall, owl-delivered with an unassuming brown wrapping and a simple note attached.

For your birthday, a bit late but I hope it’s worth the wait. - E

Sebastian’s heart tightened as he read her familiar handwriting, memories of his birthday flooding back—the warmth of her hand in his, the quiet comfort of their conversation before everything had fallen apart. He hadn’t spoken to her since, hadn’t been able to face the sadness in her eyes he’d caused, or the hurt he’d heard in her voice. He felt a sharp pang of regret now, staring at her note, knowing that the pensieve was meant as a way to share that memory she’d gifted him in the vial.

With a sigh, he gently opened the package, revealing a small, polished pensieve, its surface reflecting the candlelight in shimmering waves. It was beautiful—clearly chosen with care.

Sebastian barely registered the bustling hallways as he made his way back to the Slytherin common room, his heart pounding with anticipation. He knew he’d be late to class, but the thought of Evangeline’s memory, sitting here in his hands, waiting to be seen, pulled him forward like a magnet. The curiosity—the need to know what she’d chosen to preserve, to share with him—overpowered everything else.

He reached his dormitory, shut the door firmly behind him, and set the pensieve down on his bed, his hands trembling as he uncorked the vial. Pouring the shimmering, silvery substance into the basin, he watched as it swirled into shapes and patterns, inviting him in. He took a steadying breath, then leaned forward, dipping his face into the pensieve.

The world shifted, and in an instant, he was transported into her memory.

It was a bright, warm day by the Black Lake. He and Evangeline sat on the shore, their shoes discarded as they dangled their feet in the cool water, laughing as they skipped stones across the surface.

Sebastian remembered that day in fifth year—a rare, blissful afternoon when nothing weighed on them. No school, no worries about Anne, Ranrok, or the shadow of responsibilities; it had been just the two of them, lost in a world that felt entirely their own. The lake sparkled under the warm sunlight, glinting like scattered diamonds, while the gentle sound of the water met their laughter. And he could see it now, the way she had looked at him then, her gaze soft and steady, studying him as though she were trying to memorize every line of his face.

There was something in her eyes that made his heart clench—something vulnerable, hopeful, loving. Then she leaned her head against his shoulder, letting out a contented sigh as they watched the ripples on the lake, their breaths falling into an easy rhythm. He remembered the warmth of that moment, how he’d felt a sudden, unspoken understanding settle over them, like an invisible thread weaving their souls together.

As he watched on, Sebastian became acutely aware of details he hadn’t noticed back then, as if seeing himself through her eyes was revealing parts of himself he’d never fully understood. He caught faint whiffs of the breeze coming off the lake, and in the memory, he could smell his own familiar scent mingling with hers. The faintest hint of cedar and parchment, of some warmth he hadn't realized he always carried with him. The way she’d bottled this detail, even something so small and unnoticed, made him see how much she’d remembered him exactly as he was, how every part of him was imprinted in her mind.

When his fifth-year self shifted to toss a stone across the lake, Evangeline watched him with a soft, lingering gaze, her lips curving into the smallest, most secretive of smiles. He realized she must have looked at him like this a thousand times, a mixture of admiration and fondness in her eyes, a look he’d always missed.

The memory unfolded in soft, unspoken simplicity, each detail preserved like a quiet confession. Through her eyes, he saw himself—looking younger, his laughter unrestrained, his gaze lighter. He saw the trust between them, a bond so natural he’d barely questioned it at the time. He remembered his heart racing at her closeness, and now, with a bittersweet clarity, he realized they had shared a steady, quiet love that had been there all along, even back then.

As the memory began to fade, an ache settled deep in his chest. Evie hadn’t just preserved their day by the lake; she’d captured a piece of his soul that he hadn’t even realized he’d entrusted to her. In sharing this memory, she’d offered him a reminder of the closeness they’d shared, of the way they’d seen each other before everything had become so complicated. It was a moment he could return to, a way to feel how she saw him—how she’d treasured him, just as he was.

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deepwaterdreams · 1 year ago

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To know when to stop

I'm writing a fic set post-hogwarts legacy on ao3, here's a snippet of the first chapter ;)

Summary : A decade has passed, and despite all her efforts, there were memories Agnes could not just forget about. Perhaps the key was to remember, to be whole again. Even if it meant remembering him.

______________________________________________________________

It spread and a pensieve came out of it. Above, there were phials, identical. In a way, they were the same: just as precious and painful, they all had that common element she tried to forget for a decade, hopelessly, uselessly. With caution, she opened one.

She poured the content in the pensieve, slowly. The curls and clouds forming inside seemed harmonious and strangely familiar, they called for her. Had she really no other choice? She was already in so much pain, would she be able to endure more? She forgot for a reason. But as of now, she could not keep going as she did. She was weak, but she had to be strong, for Anne, for Ominis, for their child. She had to be. How could she help them if she was weak and incomplete? Too bad for her if she was hurting, she had to bear it. With an inhale of oxygen filled with fear, she dived into it, already feeling tears forming in her eyes.

“When you said you could help me with care for magical creatures class, I expected we would go outside, you know, with the magical creatures that is? Shah is strangely made to resist the cold night, but still, that is a bit much to say she is a creature, even for me …”

“Are you finished?”, Agnes laughed.

“Never, I would even say that is part of my charming personality”.

She rolled her eyes and smiled at the same time. She would never say it to his face, but Sebastian was absolutely right. She just knew that if she looked at him, she would see that mischief she loved dancing in his eyes, that cocky smile of his and raised eyebrows as the sign he is damn proud of himself. She would not give him the satisfaction to know how much he was right. Instead, she just kept walking until she was in that familiar place. She stopped and started to pace in front of the empty wall. Sebastian looked at her, confused.

“Are you feeling alright?”, he asked, “Did someone cursed you or something?”

“Wait and see”.

The door appeared as expected in front of them. She took a certain pleasure in seeing her friend dumbstruck and she opened the door with a ceremonious teasing gesture, inviting him to go inside with a caricatural “after you dear sir” and a bow just as exaggerated.

“How did you find this place?”, he asked.

Inside, he saw the giant hippogriff statue in the middle of the room and the – too many? – numerous pots where she grew variety of plants she would use in potions during her potion classes or her many adventures and explorations. She saw him look at her never-ending libraries, full of books, with a certain want. His eyes then went to the vivarium in front of him, then on the others. A sudden crack startle Sebastian and he looked curiously at the house-elf that appeared in the room.

“Hello Deek”, she greeted.

“Do we have a special guest today?”, he simply asked after bending his head as a greeting.

“Sebastian is a friend”, she explained, “he needs help for our care for magical creatures class, I thought we could show him the one we saved and that it wouldn’t bother professor Weasley”.

“Deek thinks it is a good idea”, the creatures answered, way to happy to show to someone the good work they did with all those creatures.

“Come”, she said to Sebastian, way to surprised by everything to say or do anything really.

She took the stairs to her right and went up. Sebastian hurried to be by her side and leaned towards her.

“You’ve got a house-elf?”, he shouted-whispered, “What in Merlin’s name is this room?”.

“The Room of Requirement, and you haven’t seen half of it yet”.

Once they reached the vivarium she wanted to show him, she stopped and Sebastian seemed strangely focused.

“When we are inside, stay by my side. They don’t know you, but if you stay close to me, they should understand you are a friend”, she explained.

“They should?”, he repeated, uncertainty in his voice. “Wait, who is “they”?”.

She simply smiled and entered the vivarium. The light, which was so different inside, blinded her for a second to the point where she felt like the world turned completely white all the sudden. The air and the sea-spray tickled her nose, and she could not help but feel instantly relaxed. She heard Sebastian cursed again behind her.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”, she laughed, “Look! Highwing is coming to say hi!”

The hippogriff landed and trotted in her direction happily, hoping to be petted, probably for a treat if possible as well, as the little curious glutton she was.

“It’s … incredible”, Sebastian gasped.

“Professor Weasley showed me this room, so that I can work and catch up with the other students”, Agnes explained.

“The Undercroft is pale in comparison …”

“I like the Undercroft! Besides, I don’t learn the same things in both rooms. You should bow, hippogriffs are proud, you need to show them you respect them. Don’t straighten up until I say so”.

Clumsily, she saw Sebastian do exactly that. Highwing tilted her head several times, came closer to sniff him and eventually, she bowed in front of the Slytherin boy. She accepted him.

“See?”, she said enthusiastically, “She likes you already, you are doing great”.

“If you say so … Kneazles are yowling every time I get to close to their taste, even puffskeins go avay when they see me”, he grumbled.

“Let’s say you may be too … direct?”

“Direct? What do you mean?”

“Well, maybe a bit rough or brutish. You are too impatient with creatures. You need to be softer with them”.

“I can be soft!”

She laughed while taking Highwing’s head in her hands to place a noisy kiss at the base of her beak. She shook her head at the gesture, but she then proceeded to rub her head on her little human, to show her own affection.

“You can touch her, if you want to”, she offered.

“I want to keep both my hands”, he simply replied.

“Highwing is adorable!”

“Until you’re missing your nose. Even professor Howin would tell you so”.

“Professor Howin is not here and she doesn’t know what we went through together. Some ordeals just bound beings”.

“Like a troll attack, for example?”

She giggled when he brought that memory back. If that troll attack was not that terrifying and ravaging, she would gladly relive that first day in Hogwarts.

“We still had a great time in the Three Broomsticks”, she countered.

“Before or after Rockwood and Harlow threats?”, he grinned.

“Fine, fine, but how did you say it again? I would say that is part of my charming personality”.

“Alright, you win this one”.

With a flick of her wand, she made a brush appeared. Knowing full well the object, Highwing turned a bit so that she could be brushed exactly to the spots she enjoyed most.

“We decided to save creatures with Deek”, she started. “There are a lot of poachers around and we don’t really know what they are doing to creatures after they caught them. But we figured it couldn’t be good, not according to Deek’s experience, and he was previously owned by a poacher before working at Hogwarts. We just want to help”.

Sebastian said nothing and she didn’t know what to expect. Would he be on her side? Would he say she is mental to go after poachers? Would he understand her quest to help just animals?Highwing peeped happily under the strokes of the brush.

“Look at her, isn’t she amazing?”, she said, full of admiration for the creature in front of her.

“Amazing indeed …”

She turned her head to look at the Slytherin boy. He too had a look of admiration in his eyes, only he was staring at her. She chose to focus on the hippogriff to conceal her blushing cheeks. In the sky, she heard Caligo called for his partner, followed by the fwooper couple Filipine’s and Fernand’s chirping.

“Are you going to keep them here?”, Sebastian asked then.

“Where do you want me to keep them otherwise?”

Highwing kept peeping under the petting she was receiving, rubbing her head again and again against Agnes’s robe. Clearly it was not black anymore, spots of dust and slobber of different creatures. A small price to pay if you asked her, to received gesture of affection from equally impetuous and adorable creatures.

“Outside?”, he suggested.

“What about poachers?”, she said, mortified. “They know Highwing and Caligo. Charlotte was terrified because she was locked in a cage, in the middle of the Forbidden Forrest. Jack was going to be killed because he was stealing treasures in Irondale”.

Just to think of her little nifflers and their doom if she hadn’t been there and hadn’t rescued them in time brought tears into her eyes.

“You realise you can’t save them all?”, he asked.

He was worried for her, she understood. Clearly, he did not care as much as her about her creatures, but he did care about her. He did care about how it would affect her. She sighed, sadly. She knew he was right.

“I know”, she admitted. “Not all of them, but at least, for some, I can try to give them a home. A home feels nice when you are scared and alone”.

He did not say a thing for a while. Highwing started to run after Caligo and both hippogriffs flew away, majestic. How she loved those creatures, she found them being so proud, so beautiful, so free. The speed of their gallop, the exhilaration of their flight … Sometimes, she envied them, wished to be similar. She sat in the sand, simply enjoying the view, the breeze. She felt Sebastian doing the same next to her.

“You never speak of it, I can help but wonder”, Sebastian started cautiously, “How is your home? I never heard you say a thing about your family while I harp on about mine”.

“Nothing to say about it, really”, she shrugged.

“I won’t insist if you don’t want to talk about it, I was just curious”.

“I … grew up in an orphanage, near London”.

She looked at the boy next to her. She was waiting for a quick remark, a reaction, something, just to cut the tension that was building. But he said nothing, instead, he just offered a understanding look and encouraged her to carry on with her story.

“I was adopted once”, she revealed. “They took me back because they couldn't handle me. I told them I saw fairies and that I liked when the nice lady from next door came to play with me in my room. They just could take it anymore”.

“Why? It was only words from a child, it was a bit extreme”.

“The nice lady from next door was dead long before I arrived, there was only her husband in the house. I think I saw her ghost, but since they were Muggles, they couldn’t see her. As for fairies, I think I only saw small lights, similar to what I see with ancient magic. But I insisted so much they couldn’t bear it anymore. I didn’t correspond to their idea of the perfect family”.

“Still, they brought you back like an old used cauldron …”

He wasn’t wrong, of course, still, it hurt to hear it. Typical Sebastian: sympathising while hurting, or the other way around. He was always double-edged, but she was still so certain he possessed a good heart. He just never thought before talking or acting.

“I eventually understood that I had to be more discreet to be accepted”, she went on. “So I blended. It worked, but too well I suppose. I was never adopted again, and now I’m too old”.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s … like pets? There are more chances to be adopted as a child. A child is cute, adorable. Nobody wants a troubled teenager. It also means I have to find a job quickly because when I turn sixteen, I’m not able to live in the orphanage anymore, and I will be in the street, alone, homeless and poor”.

She hugged her knees to have a semblance of reassurance. She was able to forget about all of that, with Professor Fig’s arrival in her room, their private lesson in the professor’s house, the goblin rebellion, ancient magic and so on. It was a heavy burden to bear, but she could just forget about her life for a moment, forget about her problem, forget about her.

“You won’t be alone. The professors know about this, right? And even if they can’t do anything, we don’t need them, we’ll figure something out”.

She smiled, a sad smile, before looking at him. In his eyes, she could see that determined spark, bright in his brown tender eyes. Who was she to take that away from him?

“You don’t believe me”, he stated, a bit disappointed.

“It’s not that”, she sighed. “I just know how it always ends. Every friend I could have and who were adopted all swore we wouldn’t become stranger. I never heard of them after that. I get it: they want to live their orphan life behind them, build something new. Once, former orphan came back, asking for a job. He went away without one. But before he went away, he told us that once we are out, we were alone”.

“In your Muggle world, maybe. But in our world, it’s different, better. We are better. I will help you, I swear. I just need to think of a way to do it, but it still easier than curing Anne. You’ll see, I’ll help you both, I won’t break my promise”.

Equally impetuous and adorable. Sebastian was not that different from her darling hippogriffs: proud, not always when he should be, loyal, sometimes to a terrifying point. She laughed, maybe it was her nerves breaking, maybe it was the immense overwhelming gratitude she was feeling. What did she do to deserve such a friend? She felt without realising she was crying tears on her cheeks. It was probably the nerves then.

Hesitantly, Sebastian came closer to her, put his arm around her shoulders and hugged her awkwardly. She nestled against him, crying without restrain.

“Maybe I should not promise anything”, he joked. “Not if I get this type of reaction”.

She laughed. Of course she laughed while crying when she was in his arms. Only him could do that. She pulled away from him, wiping off her tears and smiled at him.

“There, much better”, he said. “With a smile that pretty, it would be a shame if I couldn’t see it more.”

“What a charmer”.

“Tell me it’s not working!”

“Thanks”, she said more seriously. “I never spoke about it, to anyone”.

“Well then, that would be another one of our secrets. Only ours”.

She took her head out of the pensieve, her cheeks were wet, soaked. The liquid in pensieve never left a trace, nor was it damp. She put the memory in its phials hastily, closed it, locked the cabinet, and ran away [...].

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