#past life therapy near me
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awarenesshealing · 1 year ago
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Unlock the mysteries of your soul with Past Life Regression » . Explore your hidden history, gain insights, and release blockages. Our expert therapists guide your journey. Embark on this transformative experience and discover a deeper understanding of yourself. Book now to delve into your past and enrich your present. 🔮🌟 #PastLifeRegression #SoulExploration #SelfDiscovery
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orcelito · 7 months ago
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It's a little funny. I spend so much time compartmentalizing that I convince myself I'm totally fine, of course, all the time.
But when I was filling out the questionnaire before my therapy appointment yesterday, it was like
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.... OK yea maybe I have some problems
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Also this one 😂😂😂
#speculation nation#it's ok i am now in therapy and we have weekly appointments set up#i havent always had the best experiences with therapy. and by that i mean it has never really been helpful to me#mostly tho bc it's been depression therapists. and i dont actually have depression.#what i DO have is trauma! and barely managed adhd and fibromyalgia.#and especially grief trauma in the past 5 years. oh God do i have grief trauma.#but i searched Specifically for a grief therapist with this. so she should be equipped to properly help me.#ive managed to reach an okay place regarding my old traumas. but this stuff. man it's hard.#i pushed myself to a near panic attack the other day upon realizing the painting i have is an authentic lithograph#& the realization that i am carrying the mantle of several generations of my family now.#most of the generations above me are now dead. so it's up to us to carry on their memories#and i am The One who is unapologetically incredibly tacky. up to me to carry that legacy.#it's pressure. weight that i didnt want. but i dont want to ignore it bc i dont want them to be forgotten.#so im hoping that with therapy. she can help me sort things out so it's less... difficult.#help me remember them without being paralyzed with panic and dread.#and maybe help me with my death paranoia...? 😅 i dont like feeling like anyone in my life could die at any time.#inevitable after my uncle died with only a month's warning and my dad died with barely more than a day's warning.#idk. for someone whose will to live comes from the people i love. it's rather paralyzing.#just gotta cling to the people i have left. and hold them dear.#negative/#kinda but not really. tagging just in case considering the subject matter.#idk im just trying to sort things out. no one goes through this many sudden deaths without a severe complex over it.#but. im in therapy now. and im trying. i am.
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melissalwatkins · 1 year ago
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Website : https://www.melissalwatkins.com/
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Hello, I'm Melissa L Watkins, an Intuitive Coach, Personal Coach, and Medium. As the Founder of Guidance 311, I offer online/zoom medium sessions, intuitive guidance sessions, and integrative energy therapy sessions. With my extensive expertise as an IET® Master-Instructor Teacher and Evidential Medium, I possess a range of gifts, including clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience, and claircognizance. By connecting with spirit and working with the Angels, crossed over loved ones, and your higher-self, I can help you tap into the Universal Energy of Love, enabling you to experience healing and relief.
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smaranalife · 9 days ago
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awakeningloveindia · 2 months ago
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Explore Past Life Regression, Online Tarot Reading, and Chakra Healing Courses Online
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The demand for spiritual growth and personal development has led to a surge in online learning opportunities for those interested in expanding their knowledge and skills in holistic healing practices. If you are drawn to exploring your past lives, developing your intuitive abilities, or balancing your energy centers, there are courses available that cater to these interests. The convenience and accessibility of online learning make it easier than ever to engage in transformative practices such as the Past Life Regression Course Online, Online Tarot Reading Course, and Chakra Healing Course.
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Taking a Past Life Regression Course Online allows learners to study at their own pace and from the comfort of their homes. These courses often include video lectures, guided regressions, and live sessions with experienced practitioners. By enrolling in such a course, you can learn how to facilitate past life regressions for yourself and others, providing a unique and powerful way to heal and understand your life's journey.
The benefits of exploring past lives include gaining clarity about unresolved issues, releasing deep-seated fears, understanding karmic relationships, and finding a sense of purpose. Many people report feeling a greater connection to their higher self and a deeper understanding of their life’s mission after experiencing past life regression.
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higherloveqhhtfl · 10 months ago
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Website : https://www.higherloveqhht.com
Address : 4210 Valley Ridge Boulevard, Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida, USA
Higher Love Healing specializes in Quantum Healing Hypnosis Technique (QHHT), offering transformative sessions that delve into past-life regression and subconscious exploration for holistic wellbeing. The services are designed to unlock deeper insights and emotional healing, facilitated by Moly, a dedicated practitioner with a passion for guiding individuals through their journey of self-discovery and healing.
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myperthhypnotherapyau · 2 years ago
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Are you worried about your children or teenager?
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If you feel something’s wrong, then it’s time to seek help. The teenage years can leave parents feeling shut-out and lost, not knowing if it’s ‘just a phase’ or if there’s something deeper going on.
When you look back on your own teens it’s easy to think you’re over reacting, but today’s teenagers face a completely different set of challenges. Which is why you need a different set of tools to reach them.
More Update Please visit - https://myperthhypnotherapy.com.au/services/children-teenagers/
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oceantornadoo · 9 months ago
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IDK! HEAR ME OUT THO!!!
Simon, staging the break in and what not so he could push you back into his arms??? INSANE!
Delicious story. Thank you for the food! <3
so originally when i made that last fic (which unexpectedly blew up tysm everyone) i added in the creepy elements almost on accident?? but this and another reply has me thinking...
tw: slight humiliation (but you'll like it)=
simon riley wasn't a bad man. he also wasn't a bad husband. at least that's what he told himself.
when you had presented him with those divorce papers a bit ago (13 months and 4 days, but who was counting), he thought it was a bluff. a joke. he had gone too far in your last argument, and that was your reaction. when he told you he'd go to therapy, you stared at him with a look he'd only see on men in the battlefield. dead all the way through, a walking husk. so he signed them and went to therapy anyways.
the whole time, this whole 13-month break, where you had been 'building a new life' or whatever, he had been planning. internalizing the commentary his therapist would make, and then spitting it back out to you while you moved out of his place. every time you seemed to forget one extra box, and who's to say if he hid a couple in his room? he had a plan.
over time, simon really seemed to have learned so much from therapy. so much about communication. he had become open and welcoming, far from that man who would respond to your complaints with hard stares and a lack of words. so maybe you met for coffee a couple of times and that's how he knew about the cafe by your new place. maybe that's how he tailed you one night after a date, just to make sure this new guy didn't try anything (and not to figure out your unit number). whatever he did, he played a dangerous game by letting you have this illusion of freedom while balancing his presence in your life, just enough to make you want more. after weeks and week of stagnant progress, he needed one extra push. something small, not even a shove.
and if he happened to mention your unit number to a bunch of shady guys that hung out in the alley by your building? happened to brag about your pretty pussy and sweet-smelling panties? maybe mention your habit of not locking the window when you left for work? who's to say. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
and now here you were, back in his arms where you belonged. a little frightened but comforted in the knowledge that he could protect you. the ghost wasn't shed when he took his mask off, but you didn't need to know that.
--
your body was so used to being in simon's arms you didn't even realize you had been grinding on him for the past ten minutes. his boxers you wore were sticky with arousal as you grinded against his clothed cock in the dark. even in your dream, it was simon underneath you, no one else. "si." you panted, a near-whisper that only a military man could have heard. "dove?" he adjusted your sleeping positions, tossing the covers to give you more room to maneuver against him.
"i know i said that thing about the line not being crossed." he gave you a low chuckle. silly little girl. you had finally realized how much you needed him and he was going to milk you for all you were worth. "and?" you stopped. shit. he needed to seem more responsive. he moved you from his thigh to his boner using one arm, the other one snaking its way under your shirt to stroke your back. you moaned as he massaged the tension from the day's earlier events away, giving you sweet relief. the sweetness of the massage made a hard contrast to the friction in your core as he rubbed you against his hardened cock.
"spit it out, baby." he growled. "can you-fuck." his hand had moved to the back of your neck now, holding it in a tight grip. his hand was so large he could feel the pulse points on either side of your jaw, heart racing. finally. "can you get me off? just this once?" he snorted, moving you up and down against him faster, dragging your sensitive clit over and over. "what's the magic word?" he flipped you both around, pressing his body weight on top of you.
simon turned the light on, wanting to see how needy you were. you were panting, shirt sticky with sweat as your chest moved up and down with exertion. he hiked up your shirt and took off your boxers, exposing your sticky cunt to the cool air. he took a sniff of the fabric, noting your small gasp as if you didn't know how obsessed he was with you already. "magic word." your mouth dropped. guess you weren't getting off that easily. "please, simon." he clucked his tongue at that. "ghost?" he left out a short laugh, arms reaching out to tug his shirt off of you. your nipples were so hard, aching to be pinched and sucked just how you liked them. "not ghost." he reached over to his nightstand, pulling something out of the drawer. he fumbled with his hand for a second, then held yours up to the light as he slipped something on it.
"husband." the words left your mouth in a whoosh, eyes transfixed on your wedding ring that was on your hand. the one you had flung at him after he complained about the divorce papers, the one you said you'd rather die than wear again. and here it was, right back on your finger, sparkling in the lamplight.
simon captured your mouth in a rough kiss, entering you with his ring and middle finger at the same time. "so willing for your husband, hm? all puffy and wet. look at your cunt, darling." you both looked down at your pussy at the same time. it was squelching, your vibrator sessions not holding a candle to what your ex husband could do to you. you were almost embarrassed by how desperate your pussy looked, clit enlarged from its earlier friction. his fingers worked in and out of you, wedding ring covered in slick. you watched as he pressed his thumb to your clit in small circles, a tightening sensation in your lower belly rising to the surface. "simon, si-fuck" he gave your pussy a small slap, pulling his fingers out as you addressed him incorrectly. "husband, please." he entered you again roughly, drawing a low moan from you. he captured your nipple in his mouth, teething it just enough to make you hurt. punishment.
"please please please i'm right ther-" he pressed hard against your clit and sent you careening off the edge into your orgasm, back bowing off the bed. simon gave you small love bites as you recovered, hand still working your cunt to draw out your orgasm.
finally, he removed his fingers and drew back from you, forcing eye contact. he put both in his mouth, moaning at the taste of your arousal mixed with the metal from the wedding band. your jaw was still open, looking at him like you had never seen him before. like the sheep's skin had finally been removed, and now only the wolf remained.
"let's get you to bed, wife."
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phntmeii · 1 year ago
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Hil
Im not sure if your taking requests for writing, but if you are I was wondering if you could do a slashers × S/O who is very strong but doesn't look it?
If that makes sense...
Like the S/O is very sweet, short and small, like she looks petite and fragile but it turns out she can easily lift extremely heavy things, or can punch really hard.
Like even harder or stronger than the slasher.
If you could specifically add Bo Sinclair, Vincent Sinclair, (NBC) Hannibal and Will, and maybe Thomas Hetwit?
Sorry I don't know if that's too much to ask for, I just love your writing so much!
Being Stronger than Slashers .
[ SFW + Fem Terms]
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Pairings: Bo Sinclair, Vincent Sinclair, Hannibal Lecter, Will Graham, Thomas Hewitt x petite!strong!Reader General Warnings: Descriptions of Gore/Blood, Violence, Slightly OOC, Descriptions of panic attack/episode, Manipulative behavior mention
A/N: ty anon for request <33 Back to slashers :) Sad I haven’t posted more of them literally in Halloween month but I’m working on it (last second lol) </33
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Bo Sinclair
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Absolutely turned on to the fucking max when he sees your strength.
Small, sweet partners was always his type. He just loves fulfilling the typical male stereotype of being a protector over his partner.
When he turned the corner, looking to finish off the last victim of the lot within his abandoned town, only to see something better.
He watched as you effortlessly were carrying the body of the victim over your shoulder like it was nothing. Head completely caved in, more of a mass of flesh and blood than an identifiable person. Your other hand held a bloodied hammer.
Bo was completely still, but not of fear. He was standing there like a man who had completely re-fallen in love again.
His eyes were shining as his grin grew wide. Approaching, he was nothing but prideful.
His voice was light with a chuckle, thumb brushing away the blood on your cheek. “Shit, sweetheart… Never knew a pretty girl like you was so… strong. I love it.”
Vincent Sinclair
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Vincent was overprotective a lot of the time. He was insistent you were never near his work nor would you be involved when victims were in town.
He loved you too much to have you a part of him and his brothers’ work.
Vincent was slightly startled, hearing the door of his studio open. He knew both his brothers were out.
Seeing it was you, he approached, silently looking down at you. You could tell there was an air of disappointment at you being in his studio when he didn’t want you to be.
A ragged, strained voice spoke from behind his mask, “Why?”
With a shrug of your shoulders and a smile, you walked past him, further into the studio. “Bo said he needed a box in here.”
Watching you walk past, his eyes were hidden but widened as he watched you easily lift up a heavy table to look under it, scrolling past the items underneath it.
He approached confused but didn’t stop you. “Oh! Here it is!” Your arms held up a filled box of tools and parts.
Vincent followed you around curiously for the rest of the day like a shadow. He was completely fascinated by your strength, wanting to see it again.
Once you returned from helping Bo, Vincent couldn't let go of you. He kept his arms around you, head on your shoulder. His quiet, strained voice simply said, "Show me again... Please?"
Hannibal Lecter
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Hannibal always held an air of curiosity about you. Your sweet nature was like an untainted part of his life. A woman so far from himself.
Hannibal’s curiosity was never-ending. He took advantage of his intelligence to learn as much as he could. Stalking, Manipulative behaviors in “therapy”, etc.
You were almost always at his place. He liked it better that way although it provided some maintenance when it came to his extracurricular activities.
Hannibal had been making another of his fancy dinners for the two of you. The presentation had to be precise and perfect. Presentation was half the work for him.
He absentmindedly spoke while you were cutting vegetables beside him, “I have not set the chairs. I will do so in a moment, my love.”
Immediately, you wanted to assist. You always liked helping out. “I’ve got it!”
Watching you walk away, he expected to finish his current task before going off to assist you. Instead, he looked up to the doorway to see you easily walking past with a heavy wooden chair in each hand, easily carrying the two like they were just a stack of papers.
A small smirk curled at his lips as his hands slowed in their work. He whispered to himself, knowing his eager curiosity was not wasted, “You are… a delight, my love. You will make for something truly wonderful.”
Will Graham
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Will was someone who was vigilant and aware. His mind always raced a million miles an hour with tiny observations and connections.
There was something about you but he just couldn’t place it.
But, what was there to prove? You were sweet and kind, seeming so far from what he knew. That was part of why he held love for you—You weren’t him.
Will was in his head again, silently panicked by his own mind. It was torturous to live in a prison of his own violent thoughts.
You were someone who always noticed. Always could pick up when these episodes started.
Holding his hands and speaking sweetly to him to draw him back to reality, unfortunately, wasn’t working this time.
His eyes kept darting back and forth while his breath quickened. With him standing still, quivering, you had to make the choice.
With simple ease, you picked Will up bridal style, walking away with him.
It took him a moment to realize what happened, breaking out of being inside his head. His eyes just stared at you when he was placed onto his bed, sweat drenching his forehead.
He broke out into a small smile, absentmindedly licking his lips, as was his habit. "I... didn't know you could do that."
"Is it a bad thing?"
"No. It's... really attractive, actually."
Thomas Hewitt
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Tommy was always a protector. Toward his family, it was evident. A given. Toward you, it was an inherent need.
The last thing he'd ever want is for you to be hurt, especially when victims come around.
He would lead you and Luda Mae into a room, having you two barricade it while him and Hoyt took care of the unfortunate victims who made their way to the wrong home.
You waited, albeit anxiously. And it only grew once you heard a loud thud followed by Hoyt's yelling.
"Goddammit, Tommy! The fuck are you doin'?"
Immediately you knew something went wrong. Despite Luda Mae trying to keep you in the room, you ripped away the makeshift barricade on the door and rushed out.
Tommy was on all fours, holding the side of his head. A man, you assumed one of the few victims, held a hammer in his hand. He quivered holding it, as if horrified by his own self-defense.
Without thinking, you grabbed the nearest chair, pulling back and cracking it hard against the man. Aimed for his head, he dropped to the floor unconscious by the impact.
You rushed over to Tommy's side, panicked. "Tommy! Tommy! God- Are you okay?"
His arm just instinctively shot out and held you to his body, protecting you in his mind. He opened his eyes and looked past you to see the victim with broken wooden pieces of the chair on top of him.
With his mask on, his expression was hidden. But inside, his heart warmed at how you were strong enough to protect him too. His own protector.
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shallowseeker · 3 months ago
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And yeah, it sucks, and Dean was cruel and murderous and dehumanizing, but on the other hand, 14 days isn't very long.
And yet, at 14 days, things were already starting to repair and heal with Jack just a little bit, even before Cas came back.
(I've seen it said that this didn't occur till after Cas came back, but in 13x04, Jack's behavior and personality are what began to thaw Dean out and, per the script, "put chinks in his armor.”)
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Interestingly, even back in 13x02, Dean’s body language doesn't match his words. Here it reads as "move behind me."
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By the end of 13x04, Dean and Jack are tentatively starting to like each other. They're even a little bit alike in this scene:
*THEM: not looking directly at each other as they say HEY awkwardly*
Jack: Hey.
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*Dean, doing the same thing*
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This is also maybe the first time Dean calls Jack by his name? (I'd have to check, but I think so.)
*Dean’s eyes flitting around nervously*
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Dean: “You did good today (pause) Jack”
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Yeah, I think you can make a well-argued case for something-something “conditional love.”
But given the Kelly-Cas brainwashing and everything else that came before, I’d say it’s not unreasonable for Jack to like having established trust. To have earned trust.
Earning trust is important in all relationships, not necessarily always an evil “conditional” thing.
///
Then Dean goes and apologizes to Sam, saying that he was out of line during the therapy session and that he's sorry for being a dick lately.
It's sweet, but also, no one is being very empathetic to Dean and his losses. But I think by this point in Dean's life, Dean's not really expecting that either.
He’s only able to get that support from one person in his life right now: Jody Mills. (13x03) Which is part of why he felt comfy taking the case with her, I think.
Later in this scene, in a break with his past tendencies, Dean will actually try to rely on Sam:
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DEAN: And he tapped his power and saved our asses, so that's a win.
Sam was right about one thing, though. It wasn't Jack’s powers that impressed Dean, or even being saved. It was the effort.
(Jack's personality was already thawing Dean, too.)
///
The rest of the scene is sweet. Dean tries to see Sam's perspective, and Sam tries to see Dean's.
It's a trading of strength and hope, which is how real families are, too. Our strength and resilience wax and wane, and we share our burdens, but we try to share our hope, too.
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This is a rare occasion: Dean is trying to share a burden; he lets Sam know how bad it really is.
(Dundundun! Ellen Harvelle would be proud.)
Dean is accepting that Sam isn't going to get there on his own. So he spells out his despair for him. The Cas of it all.
And Sam seems to get that it’s a Cas thing. That's clear in his behavior in the next episode. And Sam wants to be there for Dean, I don't think that's a lie, but…
Sam ALWAYS wants Dean to tell him stuff like this, to talk out the big stuff. But one of Sam’s hopes is that talking things out will fix them.
(Classic Type-A kinda mentality.)
But THIS? Cas’s death isn't fixable, not quite as nebulous as the mom-in-Apocalypse-World-problem is. (In fact, I wouldn't put it past Sam to have been up all night researching, finding NO way to get Cas back. Alternatively, the constant casework could represent just utter denial.)
Anyhoo, Sam's grieving the losses too, but Dean is different. And unfortunately for Sam, John Winchester's grief was so horrendous and frightening that seeing Dean's, uh, particular kind of grief triggers Sam's panic response.
Just look at Sam’s face here.
SAM's BRAIN: brrrrrrrr RED ALERT brrrrr RED ALERT
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*Meanwhile*
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///
Next episode (13x05):
We find Sam in a state of near-panic. Just look at that face:
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And actually, looking at Sam's D8> here…
..I think it's possible that he TOTALLY knew what the PB&J stuff was about, and his brain went into a meat grinder of:
OH NO FUCK NO NO NOT THIS--I RECOGNIZE THIS. THIS KIND OF GRIEF RUINED MY CHILDHOOD!!!!!111
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{8[
Don't Grieve in Front of Me Dean (analysis)
Don't Grieve in Front of Me Dean Redux (s7 analysis)
///
So.
Sam finds a case about best friends. Makes you wonder what he was googling to find it...
And Sam’s distress surrounding the case is interesting, because he is behaving so DIFFERENTLY than he was in 13x02 and 13x03:
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Dean: *cue surprise*
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Dean is weirded out. Maybe he figured Sam would let him take a real break, or maybe it's just that the timing of Sam’s suggestion of leaving Jack behind feels weird now.
They’ve switched places.
Dean was eager to leave Jack in 13x03, and Sam was the one insisting on them staying with Jack to help him “learn to control his powers.”
Now, in about two weeks’ time, Sam’s like—“Jack has TV! We’ll put up extra warding! It’ll be fiiiine!”
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Dean’s brain, probably: Hmmm. Sam is trying to cheer me up, but wow are these about-faces on what's bad parenting and what's good parenting kinda fucked up.
///
And at the end of the episode, Dean tries again to tell Sam just how bad it is (mirroring Mary's willingness to offer up “not being okay” in s12):
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And Sam is pretty much at sea.
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awarenesshealing · 1 year ago
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suzukiblu · 4 months ago
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WIP excerpt for S; the puzzle trap sex-room. tw: discussion of past dubcon/underage sex, past grooming, unhealthy coping mechanisms. (( chrono || non-chrono ))
"It's fine, Jesus," Superboy says, more than a little frustrated with literally every-fucking-thing at this point. "I mean the pollen and the livestreaming and the deathtrap were all extremely fucking shitty but for, like, the millionth time, it was just sex." 
"Sex with someone that you aren't attracted to who is a gender that you aren't attracted to," Robin says tightly, clenching his fists down by his sides. Superboy does not look anywhere near Superman. 
Goddammit, he thinks. 
"No," he says, just pretending they're alone in this stupid cave because it's not actually cool to make Robin think the situation is any worse than it already is, and Robin's the one who already got upset enough to fucking puke over the situation, so . . . "Like I was kinda annoyed over the hair-pulling thing and you were pretty pushy and I definitely did want a condom involved, but–just, look, that problem is not a problem, alright? Neither of those problems are, uh . . . problems. And what do you care, anyway, nobody's gonna think you're into dick just because you got roofied into oblivion and fucked the only convenient mouth in the room." 
God, though, only he could ever possibly be enough of a fucking loser to end up having to confess to the stupid sexuality crisis he's been having in the fucking Batcave. In front of Batman. In front of Superman! Like–sure, why not, this might as well happen. Why not! 
Robin stares at him. 
"You have a crush on me?" he asks in obvious disbelief. 
"I didn't say I had a crush on you, Jesus," Superboy grumbles, re-folding his arms and very, very firmly still not looking anywhere near Superman. Or anywhere near Batman either, just while he's at it. But admittedly it's mostly Superman he's not looking at. "Ego much, birdboy?" 
"You have a crush on me," Robin repeats, covering his face with his hands again, and Superboy scowls at him and does not blush. "You have a crush on me and I made you go down on me in a deathtrap without even kissing you first." 
"Brush your teeth and we'll talk," Superboy says with a dismissive shrug, since Robin again did very literally just puke in that trash can and all. And like, yeah, the guy doesn't even like guys, but the flippancy is just a reflex at this point. 
Robin splays his fingers and stares at him. 
"Go to therapy and we'll talk," he says. Superboy scowls at him again. Rude. 
“Look who’s fucking talking, Bat-boy,” he says. “Are we all done freaking out about nothing now? Can I go get back to my life, please?” 
“Superboy, if you would be willing to talk to . . . someone . . .” Superman starts in a very careful tone that Superboy immediately hates the sound of. 
“Yeah, no,” he says in exasperation, just–not looking at him, still. “Therapy is for supervillains in Gotham and civilians fresh out of crisis situations, not for perfectly fine active duty superheroes who are just bad at problem-solving under pressure.” 
“You solved the puzzle perfectly, actually,” Batman says, just as neutral as before. 
“How are you making that sound like a bad thing?!” Superboy demands, shooting him a dirty look.
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topguncortez · 1 year ago
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Are You With Me? | Ch I
| Jake Seresin x Shy!Wifey
series masterlist | next part
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synopsis: Jake gets a terrifying call in the middle of the night that has him rushing to his ex-wife's side. Y/N is put in the middle of two men who she cared about. The Seresins get shocking news.
word count: 2.2k
warnings: emergency rooms, medical inaccuracies, mentions of blood, childhood cancer, fighting, divorce, mentions of cheating
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“What happened?” Jake asked, out of breath as he ran down the corridor. He had just fallen asleep when he got a frantic call from his ex wife. He could hardly make out the words she was saying to him, but he managed to understand that she was taking their daughter to the ER. It was like a hot knife in Jake’s chest as he sprinted out of bed and broke nearly all traffic laws to get to the hospital. 
Y/N’s was shaking like a leaf in the wind, as she took a step away from the large window where she had been watching doctors and nurses tend to her child, “I-I don’t know,” Her voice was thick with tears, her eyes and nose red. The only thing she wore was a nightgown and a jacket over it, “Ella, sh-she has had this cough and it hasn’t gone away and she started complaining about not being able to breathe and then. . .” Y/N sucked in a deep breath, trying to slow her heart rate down, “There was so much blood.” 
“Shh, shh,” Jake pulled her into his chest, cradling the back of her head. A loud sob racked through her body, and Jake held her tighter, “Let’s go sit down, okay? I’ll get you some tea and a snack.”
Y/N nodded her head, and let Jake guide her through the hospital to the waiting room. Her body felt heavy as she collapsed in the chair. The only image flashing through her mind was of her daughter standing in the doorway of her room with blood all over her shirt. Y/N closed her eyes, rubbing them with the heel of her hand. Ella had been complaining about her chest hurting and this persistent cough that would not go away. Y/N just thought it was her being sick with the common cold. 
“Here,” Jake said, holding a foam cup and a granola bar out to his ex-wife. Y/N gingerly took the items and Jake sat down in the chair next to her. The tension stretched over them as they both sat in silence, Y/N nibbling on the granola bar and Jake fiddling with his fingers. The last time they had sat this close to one another was when they were in couples therapy. Most of the time, if they had to sit near each other, they would put one of the kids in the middle. 
“I’m sorry I called you so early,” Y/N mumbled, breaking the silence. 
Jake looked at her, a small frown on his face, “I’d rather you did than wait until morning. I know you hate doctors.”
“Had to get over that this past year.” 
A year. It had been a whole year since Jake signed those papers, and Y/N had walked out of his life. It had been a year of utter misery for the both of them, but their pride got in the way of being able to admit that. It had been a year of awkward conversations while dropping the kids off at each other’s houses. A year of avoiding each other at Dagger family events. A year of tears and aching hearts when the other mentioned going out on a date. A year of suffering because of one mistake. 
“Well, Ella is my daughter,” Jake said, sitting up in his seat, “And I am going to be here for my daughter, no matter what time it is.” 
They both agreed in the divorce to keep things as civil as they possibly could for the sake of the children. Jake didn’t fight Y/N on custody, only asking that he gets them on the weekends. Y/N still allowed Jake to come over as often as he wanted to, and he was at the house most nights. Jake hated going home to that small on-base house that was nothing compared to the beautiful craftsman they had bought together after Eli was born. Y/N let Jake stay for dinner, and help with bath time, before getting the kids to bed. It was always awkward when he’d leave for the night; both of them wanting to ask the other if they would stay. 
“I know,” Y/N swallowed, “I just. . . I don’t know.” 
The silence stretched back over them. The lobby of the emergency room was surprisingly busy for an early Tuesday morning. Drunkards were waiting to get fluids to sober up. A couple who looked like they were about to have a baby sat in the corner, the man coaxing his wife through breathing exercises. A sad looking elderly man with a deep frown etched on his face. A mother holding her child to her chest, soothing his hiccups. Y/N longed to be able to be back with Ella, but the doctors had ushered her out of the room when Ella quit breathing. 
Y/N was lost in her thoughts when a voice called out to her, “Y/N.” 
“Miles,” She stood up from her chair, “W-what’s going on? Is Ella alright?” 
“You’re my daughter’s doctor?” Jake said, eyeing Miles up and down. 
Y/N shot a glare in Jake’s direction. Now was not the time to get in a pissing match. 
“I am,” Miles said, brushing off Jake’s comment, “I was working a round in the ER when she came in. I’m also lead pediatric surgeon.” 
Rolling his eyes, Jake muttered, “Of course you are.”
“Anyway,” Miles continued, “We ran some tests on Ella, a simple blood test and then an X-Ray,” He paused for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. Y/N’s hand reached out for Jake’s on instinct, squeezing it, “Her blood test came back showing signs of abnormal cell growth, and there’s a small mass on the right lower lobe of her lung.” 
It was as if Miles had slugged Y/N in the chest. She sat down, afraid her knees were going to give out if she were still standing. The words Miles and Jake were sharing might as well have been a world away, as none of it was making sense to her. 
“How did this happen?” Y/N asked, her voice felt foreign to her as she looked up at the men, “How did I miss this?” 
“We don’t really know,” Miles said softly, “Sometimes, the body just creates abnormal cells. Lung cancer in kids looks totally different than lung cancer in adults. It’s not your fault.” 
Y/N nodded her head and looked down at her hands, “So what do we do?” 
“We’re gonna discharge her for today, and send you home with some medicine to help suppress the cough. Then we’re gonna get you set up with an oncology appointment, run some more tests and we’ll go from there.” 
“Can we see her?” Jake asked. 
“Of course,” Miles nodded his head, and told them Ella’s room number. 
Jake sat down next to Y/N, letting out a deep sigh. This was the last thing he thought was going to happen when Y/N called him at 2:30 in the morning. The only person Jake knew to have lung cancer was his grandfather, and it was a bitter end to his life. Hospitals, and oxygen masks, and not being able to do anything but lay in a bed and wait for death to come. It wasn’t what he imagined for his little girl. Not in this lifetime. 
“You never told me what happened between you and Miles?” Jake asked, looking over at Y/N. 
She let out a sigh, stretching her arms out and flexing her fingers, “Just didn’t work out.” 
Truth was, Y/N was so irrevocably in love with Jake, that being with Miles was only going to cause more harm than good. Miles had been the perfect guy; he was respectful, kind, he cared about Y/N’s kids and treated them with respect as well. He also loved her, flaws and all. And that was the issue. Miles loved Y/N more than Y/N could ever love him. It broke her heart to have to break up with him, but she couldn’t let him continue to think that something was going to happen. 
Jake hummed, “I thought you two were going to get-” 
“Can we not talk about my love life right now?” Y/N snapped, looking at her ex, “Now is not the time.” 
“I’m sorry,” Jake apologized, “She’s going to be okay, ya know?” Y/N’s eyes filled with unshed tears, “She’s strong and healthy, just like you.” 
Y/N nodded her head, “I know. It’s just not what I want for her. I hate this!” 
Jake wrapped his arm around Y/N’s shoulder and brought her into him. He hated seeing her cry and in the past year, he had seen her shed a lot of tears. Over the years, Y/N got better at stuffing her emotions down. It was hard raising kids with a husband who flew jets at supersonic speed into dangerous territories. She had to become both mentally and physically strong to withstand the months of Jake being gone and her left to raise the kids. Now, those emotions came crumbling down. 
“Let’s go back and see her, okay?” Jake asked, pressing a kiss to Y/N’s temple. She wordlessly nodded her head and Jake stood up, helping her to her feet. 
They rode the elevator in silence up to the pediatric floor where Ella was. When the doors opened they were met with bright colored green and blue walls with various animals painted on them. Children were just starting to wake up on the floor, as nurses and aids went into their rooms with colorful cups of medicine. Some parents had spent the night, sleeping on a cot next to their child’s bed, other parents were just arriving with cups of coffee and tired looks on their faces. Y/N was surprised at how warm the unit felt. That was the one thing she hated about hospitals. They always felt so cold and lonely. But the pediatric ward was filled with bright smiles, and laughter. 
Jake knocked on the door to Ella’s room, which had a painted unicorn on it, “Knock, knock,” He said, slowly opening the door. 
“Daddy!” Ella exclaimed. Jake rushed over to the bed, and hugged his little girl tightly. He wasn’t sure if it was because of her illness, but she felt smaller in his arms than she had ever felt, “I missed you.” 
“Missed you too Ella Bella,” Jake said softly, and placed a kiss on her temple, “How are you feeling?” He helped her lay back in bed, and covered her with a blanket. Y/N silently walked to the otherside of Ella’s bed as Jake sat down on the small mattress. 
“I’m tired,” Ella yawned, “Nurse Becky gave me strawberry jell-o and Auntie Val saw me when I had my pictures done!” 
“She did?” Y/N asked, trying her best to sound happy. She made a mental note to contact her best friend and tell her how thankful she was for her visit to Ella. If there was one thing about Val Machado, it was that she was going to care of her friends’ kids. Val even said once the Seresin kids were basically her kids and vice versa. 
“Yes! She gave me a unicorn sticker! Like the one on the door!” Ella held up the sticker that was on her hospital gown. 
“That’s beautiful baby,” Jake said, his green eyes full of love as he brushed his hand over her cheek. 
“Daddy,” Ella said softly, “Can I go home now?” 
“Yes Elles,” Jake nodded his head, “We’re gonna go home. You, me, and Mommy.” 
A weird feeling went through Y/N’s chest when Jake said they were all going home. She tried her best to ignore it, knowing that Jake was only saying words to comfort their daughter. When a nurse came in, Y/N and Jake excused themselves to go sign some paperwork and set up the next doctor’s appointment. They sat on opposite sides of a round table, Jake filling out insurance forms while Y/N sighed Ella’s discharge forms. 
“You shouldn’t have told her that you were coming home,” Y/N muttered. 
Jake furrowed his eyebrows, “Why? I am coming home with you guys.” 
“Jake,” Y/N sighed, setting the pen down. 
“No,” Jake answered, “I am not just gonna go back to base and pretend like everything is fine and dandy. Cause it’s not fine and dandy, Y/N. Our child is sick.”
“I know,” Y/N’s voice became thick with tears, “I know this, Jake.” 
“Then don’t push me away,” Jake sounded defeated, “Not now. Not when we need each other the most.” 
Y/N let out a shaky sigh, “I just don’t know if I can forgive you.” 
“You don’t have to,” Jake said, getting up from his chair and going over to kneel in front of his wife. He grabebd her hands in his, running his thumbs over the back of them, “You don’t have to forgive me now or ever. But you need someone to rely on and be there just as much as I need someone to rely on and be there. This isn’t going to be easy. . . but we are the only ones who will understand what we are going through. We need each other right now.” 
Y/N bit her lip and nodded her head, “Okay.” 
“Okay?” Jake asked, his eyes full of hope and longing. 
“Okay,” Y/N said again, sniffling, “Let’s go take our baby home.”
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suhkusa · 4 months ago
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EGOIST 22. FINAL.
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PAIRING. Atsumu Miya x f!Reader
CW. timeskip, angst, fluff, little surprise at the end
A/N. this is it!!! thank you for those who have stuck around for the past year, i'm sorry it's taken me this long but i hope it was somewhat worth the wait!!! i enjoyed reading your comments and asks about the series sm. this series challenged me in many ways, but helped me get back into writing. i love u all sm and thank u again <3 ps if u have any questions or want me to answer some “whats if”s feel free to send an ask!!!
-> MASTERLIST.
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3 YEARS LATER.
Atsumu is absolutely hyped. 
He’s finally here, the real big stage. The Olympics. 
Never in a million years would he have thought that he’d get here alongside many other amazing volleyball players. He’s snapped out of his thoughts when he hears his name being announced, leaving from under the stadium seats to run out to the main courts, allowing himself to flourish in the loud cheers. 
Atsumu was on his A-Game, he didn’t care who he’d have to go against, he was determined to win. 
The rest of his team came out shortly after Atsumu, the group of them huddled up near the coaches as the other team was loudly called out. The first match they had was against the U.S, and something about that sounded familiar, though he didn’t bother to think too much into it. He squinted as he listened to his coach yap about doing good out there and not let them get under their skins.
After the other team is lined up, the Japan team is lined up in front of them. There’s some commencement announcements that are being played on the speaker, allowing Atsumu some time to enter the zone. 
When the whistle blows, everyone takes their positions. Atsumu is ready. 
The match starts with the sound of a buzzer. And everyone is on the move. 
The U.S’ team was definitely a challenge for Japan’s, but after the rigorous training they’ve been put through, the win was more than easy to steal, the match ending at the 4th set with Japan named the winners.
Everyone cheered as they celebrated their victory in the main court. As Atsumu’s eyes scanned through the U.S’ team, his eye was caught on a woman who stood by the coaches.
His gaze went right past her at first until he backtracked and looked again, this time more intently. 
The adrenaline running through his body stopped almost entirely as he froze in place.
It couldn’t be, could it?
–––
It’s hard to celebrate along with the rest of the team when his heart and his mind caught on to you. 
After going to multiple therapy sessions, he’d finally found it in him to let you go. From his mind at least, not so much his heart. 
But it felt like all the progress he was so proud of himself for making just washed down the drain. Just at the mere sight of you. Did you see him? Were you proud of him even though you were on the opposite side of the court? Were you involved with any of those men on that team? How have you been? You cut your hair? Seeing you let the many thoughts that he thought he had locked away loose. Though, he wasn’t sure if he was so mad at the occurrence.
Perhaps it was fate’s cruel way of reminding him that his past never really goes away. But even so, he knows better than to go out of his way to find you. The last time he talked to you was a hard time in his life, and you made it more than clear that you wanted nothing to do with him.
“You coming, Miya?” his teammate, Sakusa Kiyoomi, called out to him. The two had been chosen from the MSBY team together, alongside Hinata and Bokuto. 
“What, where?” Atsumu replies, a confused look on his face as his eyes meet Sakusa’s.
“The guys wanted to go to the Olympic Conference party, it’s at the facility down the street,” Sakusa is applying hand sanitizer to his hands as he continues, “Participants in the Olympics are all invited, but you don’t have to if you’re tired,”
Atsumu gets up, stretching his limbs out before finally deciding on going. “Sure, I wouldn’t mind getting some fresh air,”
The two of them join the others as they make their way into the shuttle that’d take them to the Olympic Conference. 
The place is bigger than it looks on the outside. He sees people from the swimming events and even the ice-skating events. The amount of people nearly overwhelms him, which is surprising for Atsumu Miya since he usually enjoys parties. He wasn’t quite sure where to go so he opted to follow Sakusa around, joining him in getting a drink by the bar.
“Be sure not to drink too much,” Sakusa turns to the other man as they both down the drinks they were given. Atsumu gives him a funny look, “I’m serious, we still have matches to play,”
“Obviously, I’m not stupid,” Atsumu rolls his eyes, “Just needed something to take the edge off, y’know?”
Sakusa raises his eyebrows in turn before gesturing to Atsumu that he was gonna go. “Oh, I’ll follow,” Atsumu replies.
“You sure?” Sakusa looks back at him.
Atsumu confused, an eyebrow raising in response, “What? Yeah, I don’t have anywhere else to go, Shoyo and Kou already went their own ways,”
“Ookay, then,”
Atsumu is surprised as he follows Sakusa through the crowd. He wonders where they’re going as they leave the big crowd and make their way to the smaller party rooms. 
“Kiyoomi!” a voice calls, and it causes him to freeze in his steps.
The other man walks a bit further up, leaving Atsumu behind. Atsumu watches as a smaller figure embraces Sakusa in a hug. 
“It’s been a while, Y/N,” 
The sound of your name was almost foreign. Genuinely, it feels like he hasn’t heard that name in a millenia. He isn’t sure if he should go or keep standing there like an idiot, but fate chooses for him as you let go of the black-haired man and catch a glimpse of Atsumu behind him.
This is what Sakusa was talking about.
“Oh,” falls from your lips, “Atsumu? Is that you?”
He feels almost faint at the sound of his name coming from your mouth, your voice. His response comes out on his own.
“Y-Yeah, it’s been a while, huh?” He curses himself for the tenseness of his words. 
You give him a smile, saying something to Sakusa that he can’t quite interpret before you walk closer to him. Were you coming up to him or walking past him? His mind turns to goo as you’re a breath away. 
“Did you want to come outside with me? It’s a little hot,”
It wasn’t that hot, it was actually somewhat cold, but Atsumu nodded and followed your lead. He doesn’t want to say too much, he’s scared. He’s scared if he were to say the wrong thing, he’d wake up from this dream.
Atsumu’s getting deja vu as you lead him through the big crowd and through the double doors. 
The two of you stand beside each other, letting the cool air blow past. It’s silent aside from the cars that drive by, and the distant music coming from inside. 
Atsumu is getting anxious with every passing second, he can’t stop himself from speaking. 
“How have you been?” He's thankful the words that escape are normal and not created off the impulsive thoughts he had earlier. 
He hears you take a deep breath before you respond, “I’ve been good, like actually. It’s really nice in California,”
You sound genuine and it makes him a little less tense.
“At first it was hard, since I only understood a bit of English, but I guess Duolingo really helps you out,” you laugh, “But I’ve met so many people, a lot of celebrities especially since they come to the games sometimes,”
“That’s good, Y/N,” Atsumu gives. He’s not sure what else to say. 
There’s a hesitant look in your eyes, “How… how have you been?”
“I’ve been good, too. My brother recommended me to his therapist so I did that for a while,” your eyes widened in surprise at that. 
“That’s good, Atsumu,”
He nods, “Yeah. Other than that, it’s been the same old, just playing volleyball,”
The two of you sit in another round of silence.
He’s surprised when you’re the one who brings up the subject he’s been dying to know.
“Have you been seeing anyone else?” your eyes find a place in the opposite direction of him.
“No, not at all. Not since, well, you know,” he beats himself up mentally for the way he worded that. Was that necessary? “And you?”
“Nope, I’ve been too busy, but I’d be lying if I said I’ve been celibate while here,” you let out a breathy laugh. “Party culture is huge in California,”
Your words prick a little at Atsumu’s heart, but who was he to judge?
“That’s cool,” a faux laugh escapes his mouth.
“I’m sorry,” your words caught him off guard, “I can’t lie to you, I have your name blocked on everything, so I didn’t know you were on the Japan National Team, but I’m proud of you,”
“It was definitely a shock to see your face from across the court,” you continue. “I hate to bring up the past, but I’m sorry for how harsh I was that night,”
“It’s fine, it was my fault,” Atsumu smiles down at you.
“Time away allowed me to really get in tune with my emotions and thoughts, and I finally think I was able to really forgive you. I mean not that it matters, I just think seeing you made me feel nostalgic,”
He laughs, “No, I get it. I feel similar,”
“To be honest, I wasn’t planning on seeing or talking to you at all during my time here. I was hoping we just wouldn’t cross paths, but I’m glad we did talk. Genuinely,”
“Same, Y/N. I’ve been thinking about you since I saw you on the court, and it was really scary considering I haven’t thought about you that much since years ago. But talking to you really helped, and I think maybe I finally got the closure my therapist was talking about,”
You share a small smile, “That’s good,”
The wind blows a bit harsher, the passage of time didn’t really click with Atsumu until now.
“You want to head inside?” he holds an arm out, which you hook onto.
“Sure,”
The rest of the Japan team are huddled in their own little group when the two of you approach them. Shot glasses are shoved into your hands before you can rebuttal. 
“I really shouldn’t–” Atsumu pushes. 
“Just do it, Tsum-Tsum,” Bokuto smiles.
Cheers, echoes through the air as the lot of you raise your glasses and down the hard liquor.
“I’m gonna find a seat just in case I collapse,” you whisper into his ear. He chuckles to himself when he remembers how much of a lightweight you are.
“I’ll come with,”
He’s surprised how quick you are to start yapping. Laughing as you go on and on about your ventures in California. It’s interesting though. The states made you glow and have definitely changed your demeanor. 
“I miss home, though,” you whine, “But I’m glad I’m coming home soon,”
Your words cause a brow of his to rise, “Soon?”
“Did Omi not tell you?” you mumble, there’s a confused-worried look on your face, “I’m coming back to Japan after the Olympics,”
“What?”
Your eyes widen, “W-Why? Should I not?”
“NO- I mean no, that’s great news,”
He can see you visibly settle down at his words. The two of your bodies melt into the couch as the time passes. He’s looking around, watching the other party goers have their own fun. Your breath falls into harmony with his own. 
The news you just dropped on him was definitely a shocker. He wasn’t quite sure how to process it.
Would you be coming back to MSBY? Probably not, huh? Maybe a nearby team? Maybe he should stop getting ahead of himself. He looks down at you, your eyes are dozing off. 
“Atsumu,” your voice is small as it calls out for him.
“Yeah?”
“Do you still like me?”
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FORGIVE OR FORGET
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© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2024. do not repost or change.
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marasvenus · 1 year ago
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What Does Your Future Spouse’s Dark Side Look Like? — [♡] ;
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Pile One ༣
Cards: The Sun, The Moon, Queen of Wands, King of Cups, The Fool, The World, Strength, Seven of Cups, Five of Cups
Your Future Spouse seems to hold in a lot of emotion. It seems like they have a side of them that’s shown to the public/those around them and a side to them that they keep to themselves. The side that others see is very self assured, stoic, hard working, straight forward, etc. and there’s another side of them with insecurity, doubt, fear, etc. that they hide from others and I think they also try to neglect that side of them themselves. They struggle with feeling invalid and unworthy but refuse to open up to those around them. It’s like they don’t even give themselves the option of vulnerability or true connection with others out of fear of rejection. They’re afraid others will reject them the way they’ve rejected themselves for so long. They are their own biggest critic and are very harsh on themselves.
They seem to be empathetic towards others and incredibly understanding of others and their situations. They might be an older sibling or just seen as a mentor or parental figure to others. They seem very wise but may struggle with connection with others. I’m hearing “tolerate it” by Taylor Swift. They may unknowingly neglect the needs and emotions of those around them because of this lack of vulnerability on their side. They do care and are an incredibly caring and emotional person but their inability to meet others have way and connection in a real and emotional way is a huge blockage for them in their personal relationships.
I do believe they will overcome and work through this before you meet them but it will take some time. I think their love and dedication to those around them will be the driving force behind this change in them.
Pile Two ༣
Cards: The Hermit, Five of Wands, Page of Wands, Page of Pentacles, Six of Wands, Queen of Pentacles, The Sun, The Chariot, The Lovers, Five of Wands, Three of Pentacles
It seems your future spouse comes from a very long and difficult history of abuse. Possibly very extreme abuse and they could be in therapy for it. They may have had to move out and pave their own way at a very young age or were possibly in foster care until they aged out of it. They’ve had to struggle through a lot on their own, though and build a life for themselves. It does seem they’ve built a very good life for themselves, though. I think they could be business owners or something like that. For some of you, they may own a tattoo or barber shop.
Your future spouse may be very friendly, social and kind but I think very few know what they’ve actually been through. I think they have a select few very close friends that they trust and that probably knew them as a child when they were experiencing the trauma they went through. Your future spouse may struggle with mental health and go through periods of time where they isolate themselves. If they own a business they may take time away from work during these periods of isolation and they just stay home. I do believe they have a very good support system that helps them out of this place, though.
I also think they have other ways of coping with their struggles like going to the gym, possibly meditating outside and walking. Being near large bodies of water also seems to help them. It may remind them of a childhood memory that was good. Possibly camping at a lake or maybe they lived near a body of water. For some of you, your future spouse may be Scottish. That was oddly specific but came in randomly lol.
Overall, your future spouse seems to be very kind and warm to anyone they meet and most of the time they seem to come off very happy and extroverted but they do struggle with past trauma and mental health and they fall into periods of deep depression and isolation that they may struggle to get out of but they have a good support system and good coping mechanisms that they utilize to pull themselves out of these difficult places.
Pile Three ༣
Cards: Eight of Swords, Ten of Swords, Page of Wands, Seven of Swords, King of Pentacles, The Chariot, The Moon, The Fool, Death, Five of Pentacles, The Magician, Knight of Wands, Queen of Swords, Two of Cups, Knight of Swords
I think your future spouse is their own worst enemy. They hold themselves back from so much. They’re bad about self sabotaging and letting their fears and anxieties hold them back from going after what they want. They lose opportunity after opportunity because they take any chance to achieve their goals/dreams away from themselves before anyone else can. They allow the fear of rejection or failure to keep them in this box where there’s no room for growth or development.
I think they have friends/family around them that consistently lift them up and encourage them to go after what they want and I think that encouragement work for a short period of time but they always immediately start tearing themselves down and erasing any progress those around them have made on their self confidence and assurance in themselves. They give themselves no opportunity for growth or change and honestly may have a sort of victim mindset where they blame their lack of growth or forward movement on their circumstances or “lack of opportunity”.
I think this will change for them though because I think a friend or family member, possibly a male friend or older brother? Will sit them down and be brutally honest them and that’s really what your Future Spouse needs. I think once their own illusions are broken down, they’ll finally see that the sky really is the limit for them and they have so much opportunity and potential for growth and expansion in all aspects of their life. It will take a lot of time and failure before they get to that place, though.
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awakeningloveindia · 1 year ago
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