#overall i try to be trusting and understanding because i believe people are more good than bad

[hiddenwritingsintheworld]

Cruel Summer Ch. 7

Donations | Thoughts & Feelings | Cruel Summer Series | Chapter 6

You grinned at the crowd as you grabbed your guitar and stood at the mic. “Welcome to the acoustic set!” you laughed as they all cheered loudly. “So originally I was going to sing a few songs that you guys already know.” You grinned as they continued to cheer. “But…I have a very special reason for wanting to play this one song…it's new, never before been heard by ANYONE but my manager…so I hope you’ll like it!” you grinned as you began to strum the guitar. 

‘This happens once every few lifetimes

These chemicals hit me like white wine

What if I told you I'm back?

The hospital was a drag

Worst sleep that I ever had

I circled you on a map

I haven't come around in so long

But I'm coming back so strong’ 

You beamed as you stepped by to strum for a few moments before stepping back up to the mic. 

‘So when I touch down

Call the amateurs and

Cut 'em from the team

Ditch the clowns, get the crown

Baby I'm the one to beat

Cause the sign on your heart

Said it's still reserved for me

Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

Hey you, what if I told you we're cool?

That child's play back in school

Is forgiven under my rule

I haven't come around in so long

But I'm making a comeback to where I belong …’ 

You continued the song, singing and glancing toward the VIP tent with a large smile covering your face. You wanted Chris to enjoy this as much as you’d enjoyed being loved by someone so openly. 

‘These blokes warm the benches

We been on a winning streak

He jokes that it's heroin but this time with an "E"

Cause the sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me

Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads

Beer sticking to the floor

Cheers chanted, cause they said

There was no chance, trying to be

The greatest in the league

Where's the trophy?

He just comes running over to me’

As you finished playing the song, the crowd erupted in cheers. You saw people taking photos of the VIP area as well, so you stood and laughed softly while they filmed, took photos of themselves with you in the background, and just overall cheered with excitement. You moved over to the piano, sitting down and smiling out at the crowd as you moved toward the mic. “Now this one? This one you definitely know.” you leaned back and began playing ‘Daylight’ inciting more screams and cheering. 

‘My love was as cruel as the cities I lived in

Everyone looked worse in the light

There are so many lines that I've crossed unforgiven

I'll tell you the truth, but never goodbye

I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you

I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you

I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night

And now I see daylight, I only see daylight’ 

Chris watched proudly as you sang, he couldn’t believe you two were together and happy. Even given how hectic your lives had been lately, you two still made time for each other. He grinned watching you as others watched him, taking photos and videos. Which you both would gush over later. He couldn’t wait to show you off to all your friends either. He was finally happy, finally with someone who cared about him as a person, and not because of who he was. 

‘Luck of the draw only draws the unlucky

And so I became the butt of the joke

I wounded the good and I trusted the wicked

Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke

Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down

Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town

Threw out our cloaks and our daggers because it's morning now

It's brighter now, now

As you performed, you couldn’t stop smiling; you hoped he would listen to these words and understand how in love you were with him. As the song came to an end, Chris cheered and whistled loudly as you bowed. 

You finished the concert, blowing a kiss to the crowd before going backstage to meet Chris. He stood there, grinning as you leaped into his arms, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. “Incredible,” he whispered as you grinned. “Yeah? You like the new song?” you asked as he chuckled, Y/E/C shining brightly as you looked up at him, “I loved it. I love you,” he said as you stared into his eyes, a grin taking over your features. “I love you too,” you whispered, pressing your lips into his again. 

Once you changed into a pair of sun bleached jeans, a white tank top with a tan crocheted beach top over it. You hopped into the car with Chris and took off on what would turn out to be a life changing weekend. 

When you both arrived, Chris told you he was going down to the beach where the guys were hanging out around a fire, and you decided to look for the girls. You found them all out on the back patio, and walked through the kitchen to access the back patio. There was Scarlet, along with Ali and a few of her friends. “Hey!” you were speaking to Scarlet, who stood up and grinned, however Ali practically shoved her out of the way and bear hugged you. “Oh my god!” she giggled again, clearly tipsy if not drunk already. “I can’t believe you’re here!” She shouted laughing with her friends. You looked from her to Scarlet and smiled. “Yep!” it was a fake smile but you attempted to look happy. “We have to get you a drink before we make our way down to the beach where the guys are!” she said as she drugged you into the house. 

-Chris’s POV-

You greeted the guys as you approached them, seeing Robert, Jeremy, Mark, Sebastian, and Anthony. The rest of the group was either guys that Chris knew from his life or his family members, like his brother. “Hemsworth! About time you showed up!” Evans laughed as the girls squealing on the deck cause all the guys to look up there. “What’s she doing here? Thought she wasn’t invited Evans.” Robert asked, trying to stifle a laugh. “She wasn’t.” Evans replied in a sharp, venom dripping tone as his nostrils flared a bit. “She came with me. Is there something wrong with her being here?” you asked as everyone got a seat around the fire. 

“Come on Hemsworth we’ve all seen the tabloids…we know you guys are at the very least fucking.” Jeremy said laughing as Mark winched glancing up at you. “Whoa…no, we’re just old friends hanging out. What’s wrong with that?” you asked as the group settled down and glanced at Evans. “Dude…you don’t want to get mixed up in that. Y/N….she’s a nice girl? Bro she’s fuckin psycho. We used to hook up when we all filmed together, she’s a clingy bitch and lousy in bed, the worst mistake I ever made. Just trust me, plus…we’ve all seen it…she used to beg me to film it.” Evans said as a few of the guys tried to hide their laughter. 

You raised an eyebrow. “What are you guys talking about? Y/N & I are friends, I’d never dream of dating her. Not in a million years.” you said before the girls giggled from behind you as Ali rushed past, straight into Evans arms. “Look who decided to show up!” she laughed looking at Y/N as she stood by you. 

-Y/N POV- 

You’d never felt so out of place and awkward in your entire life, hearing the man you were in love with say he’d never date you in a million years stung, alot. The guys were staring at you, some were smirking and eyeing your body, others wouldn’t even meet your eyes, while a few winked, licked their lips and made kissy faces at you. “Y/N has agreed to sing a couple of songs for us!” Ali beamed before looking at you as you looked surprised. “And I know just the songs!” you went to protest but no one backed you up. Not even Hemsworth. 

You felt like everyone knew something you didn’t and what made it worse, was overhearing Chris say he’d never date you. You looked surprised to see Ali reappear with a guitar and leaned over to you as you took a seat around the fire. “Can you play…Is It Over Now? And “Slut!”?” she gave you the fakest puppy eyes and in your gut, you knew. She knew. They all fucking knew. 

You swallowed, and strummed the guitar and tuned it before looking up and across the fire. You saw Chris sitting with Evans and a couple other cast members not even looking at you. Scarlet held a sad look on her face as you began to sing.

Tag List: @notebooks-of-nonsense @fdl305 @bval-1 @calimoi @syntheticavenger

[lakemichigans]

how r u doing today ?? sending u love and vibes 〰️〰️〰️〰️<3<3<3

thank you 🥺💖 i'm okay i just wish i didn't have to work until close tonight. i think i'm going to talk to my boss about working early mornings instead because i don't feel safe walking outside at night anymore and it scares me that someone can memorize my schedule & route home if they pay enough attention. but i'm also scared to rock the boat when i've only been working here for a month :( all the people i work with have been really protective of me so far and i think they would understand but i hate being a burden more than anything

[bnnuy-wabbit]

Man, I'm gonna be honest. I played the two partnered endings back to back to see the differences and I like the detective kuuno ending more than the one where we recruit kim! Its just much more fulfilling emotionally!!!!

Kim is overall very serious and composed about stuff and hes well respected by the other cops. When you get to keep your job and recruit him it DOES feel good!! Because it was smooth and really cool of him to defend you like that and you've gotten yourself a friend! a friend who truly trusts you and believes in you. Kim is the nicest and most patient man on planet earth.

But Cuno??? It's a different message. Cuno knows fuckall. Nobody there respects him and he doesnt have the measured responses and fancy words kim has, just pure utter PASSION. He almost cries of RAGE when people dont listen to him when you're trying to convince everybody about the Phasmid. Jean specifically is a cunt to Cuno and spaces out all the time and doesnt listen to anything he says ("you're hearing, but you're not listening"). Nobody believes him. Nobody takes him seriously. He's used to that, i bet.

During the islet section, Cuno is A LOT like Harry. having him around as your partner isnt like having kim at all. he doesnt help with cop stuff or adult stuff. rather, he says your lines for you. i just played the one with kim and CUNO SAYS WHAT YOU WOULD SAY IF YOU WERE WITH KIM. he has the same thought processes as You do. he asks questions just like you do. he acts a bit like you do. he makes comments you would sometimes. He literally says YOUR lines in his runs. and hes impulsive and a child, so he asks it willy nilly. you have to be the responsible one now, you need to hold him back if anything.

And then the way cuno literally BEGS the officers to let him join? to take him away from martinaise, to give him a better chance at life. Hell do anything, he promises to stop saying shit, he promises to behave. Just get him OUT of there. It feels like there are WAY more stakes, so the emotional payoff is MUCH higher

(If you like cuno of course. Which i do. theres a LOT to unpack regarding that boy.)

Like, seeing him EXCITEDLY skipping to the coupris kineema and opening the door to the other cops?? It feels good!!!! It feels really good! Like on top of everything you did, you also got to take this kid out of that shithole, to give him a chance.

You Must Understand.

Cuno mirrors Harry in MANY ways.

Nobody respects Harry, nobody respects cuno either. Harrys just some insane alcoholic, cunos just a delinquent kid. Neither are considered particularly trustworthy by the people who interact with them in daily life. HOWEVER. cuno has the spark and excitement harry lacks when harry lets him come along. he has hope. he wants to help, he wants to participate even if he doesn't quite know what he's doing. Why? Because if you got him in your party in the first place, it means he feels comfortable around you! For real, when you get that kid to respect YOU he REALLY starts trusting and looking up to you. He's ride or die. For hells sake he chooses HARRY over cunoesse! You don't belittle him and his interests like Cunoesse does! He gets to be unashamedly himself! Plus you're HIS pig. He already very much has a cop/detective fixation and during the entire time he's around harry he's absolutely PUMPED to be solving the crime with him and he's more than willing to help you out and give his two cents on the matter even if he doesn't really know anything about anything.

And so WHAT if he's just some kid? So what if he's POOR and doesn't have a camera to photograph the phasmid? He talks about harry a LOT more than kim does and with awe in his voice. He defends harry until the fucking end and he does NOT stop. He literally doesn't shut up. he just keeps fucking GOING. He blurts stuff out to defend you even if it's not helpful because he respects harry!!! truly respects him! he WANTS to help. he'll say stuff even if his words fail to convey properly what he means.

And then what?? You do the same for him. Well, youre giving me a chance right? Then take the kid along, he helped. He has nothing, his dad is a wasted dying drunkard (like me) and hes poor (like me). But he did good (i did too). He has potential (do do i). Hell behave (i'm trying to behave). Hell be a good detective (like me. he's just like me). PLEASE take him in (you're giving me a second chance, give him one too).

I Need you to understand. In my playthrough i got harry talking about how he feels like he had children at home when he's asked if he has a family. He feels like he has children, daughters. But alas. You're hit at the end of the game with Dora's 'i terminated our pregnancy because youre poor.' I get a feel that he WANTED to be a father. He wanted a family, but he was just So Fucking Mentally Ill about Everything it never came to be.

But honestly? He'd be an alright mentor figure. He clearly enjoys older kids, despite what he says about not being good with kids. He was a high school teacher! He's Clearly used to dealing with older kids and delinquents and he can talk to them like an equal, if he wants to, he can crack them too! He can be understanding.

And so what? Hell never have Dora's kids, but then he, harry (the drunken cunt) (the cunt everybody hates) (the fucking asshole), can be nice to this delinquent addict child a bunch of times (a foul mouthed jackass) (everybody Loathes that kid) (he doesnt know love) and then said kid starts following him like a lost puppy the moment harry needs company THE MOST. He accepts The Cuno. They have each other's back. They don't give up on each other. They want life to change for the better. Yknow???????

Cuno's ending hits muuuuch harder because of all that. Anyways. Yeah. rant over

[slowlydifferentbluebird]

The morning Shift - Hybrid AU

Hello there! Before the next part of the Aespa Au and the TripleS fic(still deciding which members), I wanted to drop this work of mine. I don't if the Hybrid AU is something my public is interested in, but I still wanted to give It a try. So let me know if you liked this and if you want more❤️

Can someone be employee of the month and the same time the biggest problem of the workplace? I know it sounds absurd, but it's the truth. One first hypothesis would be a case of nepotism: someone working there just because a parent or a friend is a top name of that agency; but no, it was not definitely your case. You really love this job and anything related to it. You always give all yourself, making the biggest effort to always execute your duty in the best and most correct way. But let's take one step at a time: what even is your job?

The answer is technically very easy: you work in a shelter, just not a normal one; the one where you are employeed takes care of hybrids, half-animal, half-human. Said in this way someone could believe we are talking about centaurs or mermaids, but they are not that mythical. Let's take in example the race you working with, the cat-hybrid race: they are basically normal people with few animals features like tails or cat ears. The rest of their "being hybrid" is really showed in their behaviour and antics, rather than in their body. I'm sure a description of a typical work shift of yours will be enough to make anyone understand.

Your routine starts kinda early in the morning: at 7 a.m. you arrive at the shelter, still kinda sleepy and groggy. Luckily you are immediately welcomed by one of the guests of the building. Two long arms takes you in a soft embrace, keeping you close from snuggling against your chest. "Good morning, Sakura, already out of your room today?", you asked, giggling, while kindly stroking her hair, making her cat hair move in response out of excitement. "Mmh, good morning. Yes, I felt like I had sleep enough tonight", she mumbled against your body, eyes closed in relax. You knew very well that she was lying: Sakura was very affectionate towards you and she had nightmares when you were not there for the night shift. You kinda solved the problem spraying her cushion with your perfume, but still her sleep was not the best; so her way to compensate that was literally waiting for you behind the entrance door. She had a very calm personality overall, so the staff of the place just let her be. "I see. Should we go wake up your roommate?", you proposed patting her head. Kkura just nooded and let you, starting to follow you really close from behind.

Despite this initial moment, Sakura was very mature and she rarely let herself go to these affectionate moments, especially in front of other guests. She often help you with your duties and kinda keeps everyone in check, so it's not easy to see her softer side, maybe the only one, except you, who know the japanese so well was her roommate and best friend. "Goooood morning, babyyyyyy", a loud and high voice shouted, someone jumping with so much strenght at you to send you on the floor. "Chae, be careful, you're hurting our caretaker", Sakura scolded her younger friend, crossing her arms. "Don't worry, she didn't hurt me, she just needs her morning cuddles", you reassured, hiding the pain with a big smile and focusing on scratching the forehead of Chae, making her cutely growls in satisfaction, her tail moving quickly. Chaewon story was particular: in fact despite she arrived in your shelter by mistake, because she was not a cat hybrid like all the others, but a cheetah hybrid. It was kinda a common mistake when they are young, but she was in fact different. At the start she was very aggressive and she didn't trust anyone, so she was about to be sent away...then you tried to get closer. You have always been kind and sweet, even when she was showing her worst behaviour, even hurting you, but you already knew that she was not bad, just very scared. And you were right: in no time she got very affectionate to you and also kinda protective. Not a single scratch would have appeared on your body under sight...well, except the ones caused by her cuddles.

After being held down by the blondie until her her cuddles hunger was satisfied, you slowly got up, helped by Sakura."Well, you already know at this point, I have to go to check the others", you explained, trying to go out of the door; however a pouting Chae was helding your hand to not let you go, her cheetah ears down. Even the mature Sakura was not completely enthusiast of the idea of you not being with them. "Oh, come on, don't make those faces, you're gonna break my heart. We're gonna see again in like 15 minutes. Breakfast, do you remember?", you reassured them, instantly bringing their smiles back and their ears up. You don't get how this scene repeats itself at every morning shift, but you could tell the separation anxiety was real for them, probably later they would asked for more of your attentions. However this sounded like a problem for your future self. You directed towards the next room, you knocked, asking for the permission to go inside. A soft "come in" was received as answer.

Opening the door, such a mesmerizing sight was waiting for you: this long figure was sat under the window, reading a book in silence. Her pale skin shining under the light of the sun, her long black hair almost covering her cat ears and falling on her shoulder, her black tail hidden between her legs. "Here you are, you are some minutes late today", she made you notice smiling elegantly, before closing her book and and shift her gaze towards your face. She gently patted the spot next to her, signaling that she wanted you close to her. Mina is not the biggest yapper between the guest, but you know her well enough to always understand perfectly her body language and her intentions. "You don't miss a thing, uh? I feel like I'm the one under your control", you joke, sitting next to her, your arm brushing against your skin. "I'm just very careful with things I like", she smirked before placing her head on your shoulder and humming softly. Yeah, Mina thought about you as her stuff, it was not rare for cat hybrids to be possessive, but it was quite surprising from the most introverted between the guest. You two just stayed her, enjoying each other company and the fresh wind entering from the window.

"Where's the baby?", you asked suddendly after few minutes. The cozy atmposhere created thanks to Mina almost made you forget that it was also the room of someone else with a very different vibe. "Oh, probably right now she's playing with Ka-", Mina' sentence was interrupted when someone thrown herself over you two, squeezing both of you in a pressing hug. "Oof-, I wish I could have your energies in the morning, Kyujin", you sighed, gently patting the back of the youngest guest, that was being lively and energetic as her usual. "But you have the whole me instead, isn't it even better?", the young girl replied, affectionately rubbing her head against your neck, enjoying the warmth feeling. Mina gave you an apologetic look, but you just shrugged and shaked your head to reassure her that everything was fine. It was your idea to put the calmest and the most chaotic catgirls together in the same room, and so far Mina had made a great job in taking care of Kyujin; and on the contrary, the youngest was the right person to energize the soft girl, given that often she would just lay and don't socialize at all. "You're lucky you're a cutie or I would have scolded you", you said, sitting up and caressing the ears of a purring Kyujin. "I don't believe you a tiny bit: you're too kind to scold me", she chuckled, making you roll your eyes back playfully. But she wasn't wrong tho, you rarely get mad at them and maybe that was the reason you go along with all of them.

"Come on, baby, let the caretaker go: we have to get ready for breakfast too", Mina said softly, caressing the hair of the younger girl. "Oow, fine. See you later then", she nodded, listening well to Mina words. You gave both of them few more pats before heading out. The positive side of the morning shift is that there are only few guests to take care of, just six to be precise; many others are going to wake up just for lunch and even after. At this point there are just two girls missing to check up and to call for eating all together; however even before reaching their room, you met one of them in the hallway: she was at the exact center of the passage, standing and staring at you, her tail moving left and right uncontrollably. "Karina, what are you doing here?", you asked, walking towards her, stopping just at few steps away from her. "I smelled your scent, so I just ran in your direction", she explained proudly, a silly smile printed on her face, her pupils basically taking the shape of a heart while looking at you; Karina was with no doubts the worst at hiding her feelings. "Good job, I was coming to you anyway, so you made my life more simple in this way, good girl", you praised her, scratching her chin, making her melt in your touch. If before her tail was already moving without control, now it was going totally crazy. She was so lost in the moment that she didn't even realize when she let out a loud meow, that echoed in the hallway. "I love when you call me a good girl", she admitted, beaming in your vision. "Then keep being one and wait for me and the others in the kitchen, alright?", you winked at her, making her heartbeat rise. She quickly nodded and then ran as fast as she can towards the kitchen, leaving you amused.

After seeing Karina disappear at the end of the corridor, you kept going your way, till reaching the final room: the door was open but you still need to get prepared for it. "I'm coming in, Irene", you warned from outside, but you got no response. You stretched your neck, took a big breath and finally went in. The moment you put your foot inside the room, you could feel her gaze penetrating your soul, a cold smile used like a mask. She silently got up and started walking in a circle around you. "Why am I always the last that you greet at morning?", she inquired, her eyes judging you. "Always is a big word, it's just something that happens sometimes", you chuckled nervously, trying to not fold under her gaze. "Mmh, is that so? Are you not avoiding me?", she shoot her next question, this time stopping and taking your hand in yours. You were not lying honestly, it simply was that her room was the most distant from the entrance of the building. "Yes, Irene, I assure you. You know that I care about you", you tried to convince her about your sincerity. Irene cold smile seemed to turn into a softer one...and yet, she still decided to take a bite of your hand. It was nothing too strong or dangerous, just painful enough to remind you she was not fooling around. "Ouch, why? I'm being honest", you yelped in pain, confused by her act. "I know, but I'm still pissed at you for being the last", a hint of cuteness in her voice, before licking the spot where she bit you.

You waited until Irene finished to medicate the wound that she made herself. Irene was the oldest of the bunch, she was also older than you, so for her it was natural to see you as someone to take care of, even if her jealousy attacks were the biggest threats for you at work. Being on Irene bad side meant to have an hard time everyday, luckily it was not your case: she seemed interested into you since your first day of work. Your kind ways to interact with everyone quickly made Irene have a soft spot for you. "All done, you're like new. Now let's go eat or I'll take another chomp from you", she teased you playfully, licking her own lips. "Alright, let's go, I bet they are waiting for us in th-", you tried to lead the way, but you felt Irene body remaining still; you looked at her, once more confused. "Today I don't feel like walking", she said with a sly smile. You knew exactly what she had in mind, being the oldest didn't mean acting like it in Irene vocabulary. You gave her your back and squatted: immediately Irene got up on your back, putting her arms around your neck to keep her balance and using your body as a pillow for her head. With Irene on your back, you finally went for kitchen, ready to give a start to the day of the shelter.

Now, as everyone can see, you are perfect for this job: you're kind and understanding, you know how to behave with every girl, and the guests love you and listen to you well. Of course you are the employee of the month...since months. Then what is the deal? Why are you the biggest problem of your workplace? Well, the girls love you too much! They are so affectionate towards you that they don't want to get adopted and leave the place. But honestly in a world where the hybrids are not accepted by everyone being so different from "normal people", the boss is just satisfied of how happy the guests are in the shelter. And maybe a promotion will arrive soon...

[cringefail-clown]

Jakehal is very fun. But why dirkkri? I dont understand what's appealing about it :? confused

theres a lot of things i like about dirkri and honestly i dont even know where to start lmfao

first of all, and its mostly a funny reason - davekat on crack. like some traces of davekat are still there - the arguing about shit, stoic facade vs emotional mess, all the good stuff, but its also so much more exaggerated it makes it this much more ridiculous. gets even better when you consider them under the lense of swap aus like alphaswitch or tbau, where they land on the meteor together. theyre most likely hunting each other for sports by the year two

second of all, the funney. theyd be so fucking funny together. their smallest arguments would take like twenty pages of non-stop flow of red-orange text to resolve, and not because they came to a consensus but because some third party physically dragged them away from their electronics. it doesnt do any good, since it only gives them both time to think over new arguments to use, and theyre back at it as soon as they get their phones back. like if we had a tournament about which ship would do the most collateral damage to the overall group, i think these two would be Up There. karkat would gauge his eyes out from frustration, because now not only does he have to deal with his piece of shit, know-it-all other self, but now theres also Fucking Dirk thrown into the mix. their home life is absolute insanity, a small jab about the other forgetting to buy sugar once again devolves into a screaming match about the merits and flaws of communism or some other inane shit. and theyre doing it for fun, they enjoy debating with each other, because often times they have vastly different opinions, and comparing their beliefs challenges them intelectually and morally. from the outside perspective theyre one of the most dysfunctional pair in the paradox space, when in fact thats simply how they want their relationship to be, and it makes them better people overall.

third reason is that theyre thematically delicious. dirk is a control freak, micromanaging his and his friends constantly. hes terrified of losing control, but hes also desperate for someone to just tell him what the fuck he should do. dirk doesnt think he should be in control of others, because he believes hes a naturally evil person capable of horrible acts, at the same time he doesnt trust anyone else to get things done but himself. hes a whole collection of contradictions.

kankri desperately needs to be in control as well. hes constantly injecting himself into conversations he has no business being in, trying to find someone thatd listen to what he has to say. hes wants to guide others, but his efforts are flawed, because he doesnt listen to other perspectives - hes got tunnel vision, as he thinks hes the one in the right while everyone else is wrong or ignorant (cringefail seer literally). he doesnt trust anyone else to make decisions for him, and becomes defensive when he thinks others are attempting to coddle him. his ass was definitely culled on beforus.

theyre also both so fucking lonely. dirk conciously tries to put difference between himself and his friends, worrying hell "corrupt" them. kankri tries to connect to his friends, but his behavior alienates him from them to the point of no one except maybe porrim want to have anything to do with him.

my point is, kankri wants to guide people but has to learn to listen to others and reflect on his own flawed opinions. dirk has to learn to trust that people closest to him can get shit done on their own and loosen up, as well as realise hes not evil at the core. them helping each other out - dirk teaching kankri about different perspectives, kankri teaching dirk about letting others do their thing - is something i think about a lot.

also i like to think theyd spar for fun a lot as well. its not really a reason and wholly my own personal headcanon but i wanna mention it as well bc its so funny to me. i like the idea of kankris behaviour being a complete reverse of karkat - where karkat is all bark no bite and doesnt like fighting or violence, kankri puts up a front of the beacon of love and peace and tolerance, but in his free time he gets his rifle and goes shooting at the fucking squirrels or some shit. i think he wouldnt have the same qualms about strifing as karkat. like dirk would try to jokingly jab his finger at kankris side and he would just fucking flip him over his shoulder and onto the table breaking it in half, because he doesnt like being touched unexpectedly and by gods dirk when will you fucking learn. he goes from 0 to 100 real fast. its such a hysterical concept for me.

[nightbunnyusagi]

Autism and tactlessness

I don't know if this is part of the general autistic experience or is more specific to people who grew undiagnosed — I can only speak for myself — but something that really bothers me and makes social situations far more exhaustive than I think they could be, is policing everything I say.

I was diagnosed with ASD after adulthood, but I didn't need a paper to see, throughout my whole life, that I struggled and suffer the effects from it. And one thing is that I am aware, as my loved ones like to point out, that I am "tactless" a lot of the times, which can mean I don't realize when I'm being rude, annoying or inconvenient, specially when I can't understand why that'd be.

Because of that, I was often corrected while growing up. Things that I said that were plainly honest, spontaneous or curious were pointed out as bad, usually without a good explanation on why it was bad, just that it was. After that, I'd usually be punished in a way or another, being not getting an explanation, receiving silent treatment and being ignored, having people mad at me, shouting at me, blaming me for a myriad of things or accusing me of things, laughing at me. All that came off as a punishment for being and talking the way I was.

Years ahead, now that I am an adult, I realized I learned something. Instead of learning why saying certain things is bad, I learned to be scared of what I say. I feel tense and constantly try to analyze what I'm gonna say even when that is meaningless because I can't find what could be bad about it in my memories. If I get too relaxed and let the words slip away, I get anxious I might've offended someone. I'm constantly scared to be offensive and be punished again.

That also means I am always scared of being abandoned by the people I love, and my first assumption will always be that I did something offensive without realizing. I know I'm an overall grumpy person, but I tend to be scared of people when they're mad, I tend to get anxious that they'll never want to talk to me again and I'll be alone.

I am exhausted of fights that I don't understand why even happen. Of not understanding why people get mad at me. Of feeling rejected by people I trusted and loved. Of overanalyzing everything I say and still being scared of going through all that again.

Disclaimer: I am one autistic person, late diagnosed and mid-low support needs, talking about my experiences and opinions that I believe are related to autism. I do not speak for other autistic people, only for myself.

[fragmentedblade]

I think taking the kids to a park or something could make Kalpas a little better. Violent-playing with them may make him laugh. There's no cure for whatever Aponia, Vill-V, Elysia, Kevin and Fu Hua have going on. Su is on very thin ice and needs to chill. Pardofelis is kind of there. Mobius can stay I guess. Sakura is so bland she too can stay but for literally the opposite reason. Eden is on the same page as Kalpas imo

I can't believe Kalpas is literally the most normal and bearable person among the Flame Chasers

[hollowed-theory-hall]

your personal favorite Dad Harry headcanons ?

And I'm not talking about Harry being a dad to his toddler/infant/pre pubescent kids because we all know he would be a mushy, endearing, gentle mess of a dad. But like what kind of a father will he be to his teen/adult children ?

I think he would be a great Dad, still silly and goofy but also a bit disciplinary. Suppressive in nature given to the heavy trauma he carries. I think he would break a lot generational trauma cycles and try his best to show affection but I feel like Harry would refrain from showing his vulnerability to his kids. He would share very little of his life's events or raw emotions with them but he would create a safe space for his children to share anything and everything with him. I believe he would raise his children to be kind, mature people and they will be able to break through the wall and soothe their father out of his cocoon later in life.

But what do you think ?

Anonymous asked:

hellooooo!! so i’ve seen this topic floating around a lot, especially in fanfictions, and i was wondering what your take is on it: harry and children. would harry be a good parent? would he be inclined towards children? have a natural knack for dealing/interacting with them? or would he be too impatient, too emotionally repressed, just too uncomfortable overall to really connect with them truly? it’s more a question of children overall, since i can imagine interactions with his own kids would be maybe different, but feel free to tackle both topics if inspiration hits!!

Kinda talked about Harry as a parent here already.

But, overall, I think he'd be a good dad, though a bit awkward about discipline (he would probably take cues from the other parent on this matter). As I think with his childhood, he wouldn't really feel comfortable sending a child to their room, though, he'd probably shout on occasion.

He'd never abuse his kids (or any kids). Ever. Harry would never.

I agree Harry would probably show a tough front in front of his kids but make sure to be available to them when they're younger, but once they're older he'd probably grow more open with them. I think he'd definitely show them all the affection he never received.

For the other questions of the second anon, I think Harry would be inclined to have children. Harry wants a family because he never got to have one, and I think, that extends to having kids.

I also think he'd be super caring to children in general, like, I think he'd try to be for Teddy what Sirius was to him as a fun and caring godfather he could trust with anything. I think he'd get along with Ron and Hermione's kids too, like, I think Romione's children would love cool Uncle Harry that everyone stares at in awe when he takes them for ice cream, but he also pretends to be stunned when they wave sticks at him while running around the garden. I think Harry's kids, and the kids of people he's close to would get really weird whenever someone talks about the saviour Harry Potter. They scrunch up their face in confusion because he's not at all that serious and they heard him make a very unflattering impression of the head auror yesterday's dinner with Ron while Hermione shook her head smiling.

But if these kids were ever in danger, they'd see why people are in awe of Harry. He's going to be so scary when protecting his kids/Teddy/Romione's kids/etc.

I think he would get somewhat annoyed with random kids who want his autograph on the street or things like that, though. But, he'd just sigh and sign whatever they want "because they're kids, they don't know better". When an adult asks for an autograph on the street though, he'd be much less understanding and way ruder.

[wordsmithic]

Hi, sorry if this comes out as a ramble, but your Troy ask made me rewatch the movie (for the umpteenth time, lol), and it brought a lot of old feelings back, both good and bad. The good is how much I adored the Iliad as a child and that's something that still thrives today—since I was a kid, I loved Greek mythology in general, partly because I'm Palestinian/a fellow Eastern Mediterranean, so there is a lot of overlap in our histories, cultures, customs and myths, but the Iliad has always been a favorite. Hektor is my favorite character (and I love him and Andromache), but I also have an immense soft spot for Briseis... and now to get to the bad, rewatching Troy reminded me how a lot of people erase her and her role—and her romance—to Achilles in modern retellings. Now, I'm not going to argue which Achilles ship is the best (especially because that man is a hoe, if we're being honest), I don't care. My problem is the modern erasure of Briseis and the other women in Achilles's life that are romantically entangled with him being reduced to, "He's gay, actually." It reads biphobic if you believe him queer (Patroclus too, who had many named women concubines/slaves), first off, misogynist second. He has a son with his foster "sister," Deidamia, and in some versions even married. In the Iliad especially, Patroclus tells Briseis Achilles will marry her and Achilles himself refers to her as his wife/bride, stopping a whole war when she's taken, and she's even allowed to aid in Patroclus's funeral rights. In some versions, Achilles falls for Polyxena, and tries to make peace with Troy so he can marry her. In the afterlife, Achilles chooses Helen as his wife for some reason. Just... all these women, with complex situations and feelings, are all reduced or erased in modern tellings (and usually for a man/Patroclus), and it makes me want to scream. People use the excuse of, "We don't like the romantic situation they're in," but then claim to "better" it by... erasing or reducing these women and their complex roles and feelings from the story overall? Brieseis, for example, mutually loved Achilles and saw him as a husband... he also killed her first husband and brothers, and you can argue part of her love is out of the need for survival. Yet, she greatly mourned him when he was killed, too. And if exploring this complexity is still not your yum, what about Polyxena? Wouldn't she fit the girlboss archetype of using Achilles' affections to gain his trust, before stabbing him in the back (literally)? Or Deidamia, who's young and left at home, bereft of her husband and son? Heck, try and fill in the gaps how Achilles x Hellen happened, if you must. All these women have an important role in the story, and to Achilles, that could be explored—but people don't because they dismiss what's already there or don't know anything about The Iliad outside modern retellings (mainly The Song of Achilles). So, we get people claiming things that are untrue ("Achilles and Patroclus are exclusively gay!"... in some myths, they're actually relatives/distant cousins, fun fact 😭), and acting like they fixed something by "adding" onto "flat female characters" in a way that reads inauthentic and ignorant to the source material. I get wanting to prop up one's chosen ship, it's just the hypocrisy of promising to be more progressive in one area, but diminishing the progressiveness of another, that kills me. Anyway! Sorry for the rant, I just have a lot of feelings I wanted to share because of the movie and I know you've talked about all this before—it's just something hard to discuss on the internet without people coming down your throat 🥲. Anyhow, justice for Briseis, is my rallying cry, I love her so much, queen made a whole war stop for her and managed to escape from Agamemnon unscathed. Queen who launched a thousand ships to my heart 🫶🏻.

I'm glad you re-watched it! It's a beloved of many Greeks since the movie is quite epic and makes you understand some of the original's glory. Hector, Andromache and Briseis are some of my fave characters in the movie, and it made me also look out for those characters when they appear in the text.

Btw, I would love to know a Palestinian's pov on our shared traditions and myths, how do you guys learn the Greek myths, what parts of them have had perhaps an affect on your heritage and since when, etc! 😍

Briseis' situation is complicated one because many people won't catch the nuance of her living in a patriarchal society as a war captive and thus developing a strange co-dependence to her captors. In addition, the Homeric Epics are a work changed by time in the Greek society, as people added and altered stuff, so many storylines have been affected by other layers of patriarchal societies. So of course the notion of "slave girl mourning her captor's friend" would seem natural, because they probably don't consider a slave woman's POV. Or perhaps she was in the mourning because she had to be there as a woman "belonging" to the Greeks, and the text does not mention it explicitly because it a given for the era. (I don't recall the whole relevant text sorry)

I am not sure if the average author - judging by what is published in the Anglophone market - can handle the complexity of Briseis and other women in the Trojan war. For Briseis one could go for a romance there but they'd have to depict all of her psychosynthesis properly, so it doesn't come off as "Achilles killed my family but he is hot so I love him". To be fair, it is a challenging task but I am still sad that I haven't heard retellings that do this well. Such a retelling done well would be chef's kiss!

As you said, unfortunately, the writers for now focus on the couple Achilles x Patroclus which, ok, let's accept it since it's a ship and there is some background to it (although those guys are most likely 1) cousins 2) very close to each other like brethren in a way westerners misinterpret). I've enjoyed Song of Achilles and I am surely not against such works, but you are right that the female heroines are reduced to flat characters. A fandom full of women manages to be misogynistic - again. We shouldn't be surprised because misogynistic influences are very strong in our societies still, although many don't see it 😕

[nyxtsu]

Yap session about Zane~Chan

Zana/Zane~Chan gets a lot of hate as a ship, but I think it's the healthiest romance in the series.

I personally don't think it's THAT rushed, maybe towards the end, but they didn't just come out of nowhere, it was set up in s2 and they had moments here and there in seasons after that. It was clear even before Starlight that it was set up to be something in the future. But that's besides the point. Their relationship shows healthy communication and growth between two people, and an overall good representation of how a relationship should be. It shows mistakes and flaws within the relationship, and how it's important to communicate and try to fix these things.

Despite how Nana is in relationships, and despite how Zane had never been in a relationship before, it's surprisingly the most mature romance we see.

In the beginning, we see Nana sort of trying to rush things, like she's known to do. Zane tells her that it's okay to go slow and that it's best for them. She takes this criticism and tries to better herself. Zane comes out of his shell a bit more thanks to Nana. In the 'Nana accidentally kissing Garroth' thing, Zane showed true maturity in the way he handled that. He was sad at first, but once Nana explained, he said he believed her. He believed her because he trusted her. That kind of trust is so important in relationships. I think they both truly try to understand each other, because they genuinely care. I think that's a great representation of problems within relationships and working past them. For a Minecraft roleplay.

A lot of Zane's growth as a character was on his own or with the help of Aphmau at the beginning of Mystreet, but we definitely see even more of it in his relationship with Nana. This is how it should be! A character going through self improvement on their own, throughout a series. We see him grow as a character, we got more lore as we went on, saw him warm up to the people around him, etc.

But Nana... my babygirl... what did they do to you...

In Starlight, Nana felt like a character thrown in there as a love interest for Zane. Her character didn't have much growth or depth before that, and all of a sudden in Starlight she's telling her deepest darkest secrets to Zane. While I think that they really did grow closer in "Aphmau's Year", and I do not think she was wrong for suddenly telling him about her past, it felt like bad writing on Jessons part. It just gives the feeling of "oh lets finally give this female character some depth so she can be with this male character." If that makes sense. I wish she had that growth or that lore was revealed earlier on, not just for her relationship with Zane.

So, of course Zana has its faults here and there, but I don't think it's because of their relationship dynamic or anything, I think it's the fault of bad writing (especially on Nana's part). If their story had more thought put into it, and the writers weren't so focused on one ship(Aarmau), it would have been much better. I still think it's great, and I love them, but it could have been better.

Nonetheless, they have a healthy relationship, and they send a good message to the young audience about how things work in relationships. They don't have a very suspicious age gap! And they don't punch each other or sexualize each other to a concerning degree!! Stares at Aarmau and Travelyn.

[cosmicjoke]

So the AoT short story "First Whiff: Mike Zacharias was really cute and one of the only interactions I can recall between Levi and Mike. It revolves around Mike running into Levi early on after Levi's recruitment into the SC, and trying to tell him about the storage area for facility the SC is staying in, but not getting very far because Levi cuts him off and tells him he's already been told about it and that he's in charge of getting the supplies for that night. Mike thinks about how he's not good at or interested in talking himself, and is about the end the conversation, when he smells the tea Levi is carrying, and asks him about it.

Levi is suspicious over how Mike could possibly know he's carrying tea, and asks him to explain, at which point Mike reveals to Levi his heightened ability to pick up certain scents. Levi doesn't quite know if he should believe him. He's uncertain of Mike and mistrustful, which makes sense, given the circumstances under which Levi was taken into the SC, and Mike realizes that. He thinks about how they can't afford to lose Levi as an asset to the SC, so he goes onto explain about how it's easier to pick up the scent of the objects Levi is carrying because he's cleaner than everyone else, and after that, Levi becomes less defensive and suspicious. He talks about how he thought nobody there knew the first thing about cleaning, but he guesses now that there's "somebody who understands a little." There's a time jump in the next section, after Levi's been in the SC for a while and it shows Levi and Mike talking, with Levi wanting Mike's opinion about where to buy the best tea, etc... He even joins in with Nanaba and Mike in some banter about how, once he retires from the SC, Mike will easily be able to find work as a reviewer for luxury goods.

What's cool and interesting about this story is that it shows how Mike's effort to notice something personal about Levi was all it took for Levi to become less suspicious and start to develop a friendship with him. I don't think Levi got a whole lot of that in his early days in the corps. Most people treated him and his friends like pariah's and were dismissive of them and their right to be there, but it shows, I think, how Levi really isn't as closed off or reluctant to socialize as he might appear. The fact Levi automatically becomes less cautious around Mike just from Mike bothering to talk to him like a person says a lot. We see the same thing in Levi's interaction with Hange in "No Regrets". Levi's been conditioned to be wary of people, because he grew up in a place where people were ready and willing to stab you in the back, but the way he relaxes around both Mike and Hange in these early interactions, just from them showing him a little kindness, shows Levi's own, open heart. And that really is one of Levi's most remarkable qualities. The fact that, despite being conditioned to expect the worst from people, he still has such a capacity to trust and open himself up to others. That's also exemplified in his relationship with Furlan and Isabel. It's a nice look into Levi's and Mike's dynamic, too, which we don't get much of, if at all, in the manga. It definitely gives you the sense that Levi likely got along with Mike more than most people. There's a lot of similarity there between them, obviously in them each, respectively, being the strongest soldiers in the SC, but also in their overall, more withdrawn and quiet demeanor. It makes it all the sadder that Mike died so early on in the story. I think that must have been a big blow to Levi.

[astroyongie]

Stray Kids April Reading 2024

note: please take my words with a grain of salt

Bangchan

Love: It does look like Chan was able to get closer to his crush and that things have been developing so far, however there’s still a lot of miscommunication and not enough emotional connection between the two. Chan might be trying too hard as well, and not listening to his crush's need before engaging themselves in a possible relationship. it feels like his crush isn't in a relationship anymore and be might the reason why 

Career: there’s a lot happening in their career, either the preparation of new music, preparations for new tours, ect that is putting Chan in a more complicated position because he lacks some foresight in some situations. he has been having a hard time adjusting to everything that has been happening on his life. he also wants to stay o the same path instead of trying new things like some members have been asking for 

Self: he is doing okay, both physically and mentally. he has been working  a lot on his inner self and on his self worth and trust. At the moment he believes that he is able to conquer anything and despite these initial fears. Chan has also been turning more into faith when it comes to managing his fears of the unknown 

Minho

Love: Boy is frustrated as hell. I believe that he is still in a  relationship with their partner but that things haven't been the same since september. they haven't seen each other much outside of their work which also makes things complicated (due to the lack of time). His partner is also putting a lot of red light on Minho’s actions, which makes him hasty in a sense. there’s high chances the relationship won't work 

Career: at least in his work space things have been doing well and more healthy. Minho has been helping his teammates a lot and he has finally found a healthy way to cope with everything while being productive. he is also happy with how things are turning out of the group. he got especially close to the younger members 

Self: I still believe that he suffers a lot with his mental health (and his relationship also doesn't help him at all). he is in a vulnerable position emotionally and he gets easily overwhelmed and sensitive. there’s way too much grief he needs to work on 

Changbin

Love: single as always, not looking for any relationship at the moment changbin is already battling against his own mind and his own self. He was however a lot of inner turmoils because it feel like he does have a crush on someone but he isn't exploiting it because he understands that he isn't on a good place to engage relationships 

Career: Things are complicated as well. I don't think Changbin has been having the best relationships with his teammates but also with the people he has been working with. That is because his relationships are usually filled with jealousy and sabotaging from other people and it has impacted a lot on his capacity of trusting people around him. I believe at the moment, the environment he is in and the career itself is the most toxic place for Changbin to be which is really sad

Self: without any surprise, hsi mental health hasn't improved. I sense some depressive energy around him, but also more of dark energy and thoughts surrounding him this probably linked to his work , his self worth and an overall burnout). JYP should pay more attention to him and allow him to rest

Hyunjin

Love: Okay so lmao this is a huge thing but take it LIGHTLY!. It does seem like Hyunjin and his crush have finally parted ways. To prove his point hyunjin is currently seeing someone else (it looks like this person is an idol as well) and they have been trying to get something out of here. now in my opinion, he doesn't have feelings for this person but that is probably trying to move in by using this person while also showing his crush that “he doesn't need them”

Career: career wise things seem to be going well for him. one a first instance his relationship with the members seem to be going well and also his sponsor has been also to get him another exclusive contract (so there’s chances to see Hyunjin from April-June to travel somewhere for his endorsement or for some type of public appearance). he getting the bag and the connections 

Self: Despite all of it, I think Hyunjin is also in a dark place at the moment. Firstly because he is trying to portray himself as someone he isn't and also because he is using his wealth to protect himself and to create an image that doesn't suit him. but he is hungry for change in his life which is making him take reckless decisions 

Han

Love: the relationship he had in September is finished now. things didn't work well and the co dependency was becoming toxic and his partner took the decision to call it quits. however Han is upset about it and isnt accepting the break up very well (he probably still is in denial about the whole thing as well)

Career: he has been feeling lonely lately. there’s a chance that Hna has been self isolating himself from the members and also has been procrastinating when it comes to work (like for example husband been writing his music or hasn't been contributing a lot artistically speaking) because he just isn't feeling the spark on it lately

Self: Emotionally there’s a lot happening and i think that Han needs to work on his emotions and also let go of things that isn't serving well (and in this same case, accepting that his relationship wasn't going to work no matter what he did). he is probably very dispirited and struggling to push forward 

Felix

Love: Listen y’all.. this guy is also in a very new relationship that started very recently. I have no idea who the person is and how the relationship is going exactly because I didn't get much information. All I can say is that Felix seems to have switched his whole personality (this person isn't the type of person i ever thought he would go for) so I wonder if this is an experiment or if in contrary there are really feelings here.

Career: He hasn’t been talking much with his members either, and has kept an introverted self around them mostly because there’s some members he doesn't want to talk with (cough cough). in any case i believe that he is overwhelmed and way too overwork to actually focus on things properly 

Self: Everything that he has been speaking on social media is a simple side of his idol image. It does seem like Felix is refuging in his idol image because it's the only thing that has been protecting him from the reality of his life. his self expression feels pushy and fake and i wonder if his love life, his whale drastic change is due to something hat has happened this last weeks

Seungmin

Love: Seungmin is still dating the same person however it does seem that lately he has been rather moody about his love life. that mostly because he has a sense of extreme jealousy toward his partner and he doesn't know how to deal with it. Instead of communicating he has been lashing out and just is unrealistic with his own thoughts. there’s the need of him to come down from his delusions 

Career: There has been a conflict between him and another member (I couldn't figure out who) which has provoked some tension in the group. although the problem as been fixed by the management team, Seungmin still holds a few grudges that he hasn't processed 

Self: Other than that, he is doing okay emotionally and physically. he is happy with the life he has and despite the stuff that sometimes happen he is able to regulate his emotions well. he just needs sometimes, a little time to figure it out 

IN

Love: still single and still enjoying his life as a boy of his age. Jeongin isn't interested in anyone, he has a lot of flings opportunities and people around him love him easily. honestly he is just a young boy who is living a life of a person single of his age which is actually healthy 

Career: Boyis thriving on his career, he has the good people around him and he has also a good relationship with everyone he works with. his sponsor is also doing wonders when it comes to Joenging’s lifestyle which is a good thing. he is overall happy with his career life 

Self: He has been doubting a little about the honesty of some people around him but he tries to hide it. I think Jeongin is also going through some sensitive stuff and things that make him a little more immature and emotional but this is also linked to his young age and lack of experiences.

[cowgirlcherrie]

hiii :) i was wondering if you could do headcanons of modern! ellie

Hiii lovie of course!!!! ♡♡

a/n: this is kinda drabble-ish but would love to do more of these, so keep requesting them LOL! This is a little sporadic but I love it, so I hope you enjoy <3

warnings(?): not really much mostly fluff sfw, with slight suggestive undertones but really if you squiiint

modern! Ellie headcanons

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

♡ Ellie would definitely be in college, part of her doesn't know fully why she applied but she was giving it a shot

♡ totally an undecided major, science? teaching? psychology? She really doesn't know at first but settled on psychology so she could get her degree

♡ makes you wear a necklace with her initial on it (totally possessive)

♡ magically always had weed, which was also confusing at first but she just had that good of connections around town with local plugs and dispensaries.

♡ always has a blunt tucked behind one ear

♡ makes you trim her hair because she doesn’t trust anyone else touching anything on her body.

♡ always loosing her lighter so you bedazzled it and she literally never lost it after that, she would rather die before losing that lighter now

♡ if you have stuffed animals, she tries to remember their names but gets them wrong every time

♡ A few months into dating when labels were now on the relationship, would gift you little things and act like it wasn't her.

♡ once gifted you pre-rolled blunts and you were definitely confused but before you could give them back would kiss your cheeks before saying "No take backs"

♡ keys jingle when she walks, and it's loud asf too!!

♡ whenever you can't find her she's definitely in the gym

♡ low-key would get addicted to going in her free-time ( gym rat ellie ?????)

♡ definitely rubs your back while you are studying or working from home, keeps one arm rubbing circles in your lower back and another on her phone, she enjoyed the comfort of being close even though you kept shushing her. (she’s definitely playing subway surfers or scrolling on tiktok)

strong believer that she would accidentally get tiktok famous, but everything she would post after that one thirst trap would be just videos of you

♡ loves dressing you up, quite literally sits at the edge of the bed while you try on different clothes leaning back as you come out of the bathroom,

"Twirl for me doll,"

" I love that color, you should wear that more often"

♡ one day when you see her playing guitar and beg on her lap that you want to learn, Ellie will literally take you to the guitar center the next day to get you your very own

♡ spoils the crap out of you!!!!!

♡ lovesss teasing you and resting her hands on your upper thigh especially when you wear something revealing like skirts or shorts, she tucks her hand way too close up.

♡ touchy touchy touchy! always has to be touching you somehow

♡ leaving kisses on your neck 24/7 because of the way you jump when her lips touch your skin

♡ skincare nights go so crazy, took a lot of convincing, but will be right next to you with a facemask on while you watch a good show

♡ definitely dominant 80% of the time

♡ pet name Warriorrrr ( baby this...doll that) she literally doesn't stop

♡ if you ever go to a party together definitely shares alcohol with you so you don't drink too much

♡ if you are drunk after will take your make-up off and do your night time routine for you

♡ wakes up late as fuck!!! totally wakes up at 2pm like its nothing

♡ definitely mean to everyone else but you.

I'm talking about glaring at people 24/7, crazy attitudes, and people basically asking for permission before they speak.

♡ whenever she catches you doing your natural hair, begs to help which results in her wanting to do it every washday

♡ at first, Ellie didn't understand the hype behind matching fits but does it just for you

♡ overall Ellie is just a simp for you like literally only cares about you, weed, and getting money

[what0smart]

Absolute Power:Superson thoughts!!!

Spoilers!!!!!!

As much as I would love to make an essay on this I don't think there's any way I could organize my thoughts enough for it to be good so I'm just gonna list out my thoughts on my favorite parts!

You can find my thoughts on the first 8 pages we got as previews here (page posting limit lol)

Nia understanding that while Jon often fights alone or for people, he desperately wants to fight alongside others or for them to fight for him.

This whole page is so great, I love the direct acknowledgement that Jon has been constantly fighting and all the times he had to fight alone. I will take the volcano and Ultraman where and whenever lol

Jon clearly has been suppressing his trauma and his constant fighting to make sure he doesn't lose anything like when he lost everything as a kid is clearly taking it's toll. Nia telling Jon he doesn't need to fight for everyone else constantly and it's okay to choose himself at times. This will come back in a conversation with Jay.

I am holding out having any feelings on this cause a large part of me refuses to believe DC would actually kill her, but if she is actually dead I'm gonna come back later and stare at this page in the saddest way possible.

He's so petty it kills me lmao

While it stresses me out to see them fight I love seeing them work through it, and it really shows the differences between them especially as this whole event has probably had a major impact on Jay in a negative way.

Jon realizing that he was trying to save the idea or memory of Nia over his Boyfriend after everything that's happened and deciding to prioritize what he wants, which is Jay. (more thoughts on this page at the end lol)

I think the Amazonians asking Jon for help was kind of a reminder to Jay of who Jon is at his core. Similarly to how Jon understood he probably can't dissuade Jay from hating Nia, I think Jay was reminded that Jon is just a forgiving and loving person, it is what drew Jay to Jon in the first place and that he shouldn't expect him to have the same reaction he has to Nia's death. I think Jay was going to say yes no matter what after this realization but I feel he normally would have thought about it more but decided to take that risk and give Jon a yes so he wouldn't be worried about it while in battle, you can see Jon flies away with a much more ready attitude.

Jon's "new place" is in his dreams, I had a worry Jon was just offering to live together with Jay because he thought it's what Jay would want but the fact that this is here means he has been dreaming of living in San Francisco for a while now, and the fact that Jay not being there destroying the dream really hits it home that being with Jay is what he wants. This is not Jon trying to make sure everyone in his life is happy at the cost of his own, this is Jon listening to what Nia told him to do and is choosing himself by following his dreams.

Final thoughts

Overall I really loved this issue and it really hit my expectations. It was very tough to follow at times but that's typical of dream sequences and this issue did it well, can't wait to see how Absolute Power ends and if Amanda will FINALLY face the consequences for her actions. I'll be holding out my comments on Nia until we know for certain she's dead, Nicole loves tormenting her characters so I wouldn't be surprised but I think she would also love to continue the beef between her and Jay. I'm extremely interested and hope Nicole or Sina do something in the future for Jay and Jon because right now they are probably the people at DC who I trust the most with the boys!!!

[rouge-fauna]

Not to bring up the topic I said I wouldn’t talk about again, but I told my therapist who specializes in working with autistic people about the conversation between Tubbo and Dream and how it was textbook autism miscommunication and she told me today she watched about 25min of the stream. So here are her thoughts, not necessarily mine (keep in mind I did give her some context but not a lot so this is basically an unbiased clinical outside observation of just part of the vod):

Dream’s voice sounds really nice and deep and makes a good podcast voice

The conversation was infuriating and went in circles, not going anywhere and she was surprised anyone could listen to more than 15 minutes of it.

Tubbo’s motivation seemed to be first and foremost for the views and clout and such which ends up skewing how he leads the conversation and asks questions.

But while Tubbo’s main motivation is for fame and fortune, he did still seem to try and help Dream and didn’t seem malicious even if heavily biased and with an ulterior motive.

Tubbo seemed to have prepared certain phrases and sentences like the ones about Dream driving things away from the point

She actually agrees with Tubbo and her initial perception of Dream is that he seemed like the type of guy to get drunk and go off about woman and needed an attitude adjustment, noting that she thought it was weird he would joke around with the word “whore.” Though she also noted that that didn’t mean she thought he was sexist or misogynistic at least any more than typical guys but that he could be better and appreciated his intention to stop using the word.

Now here are some things she noted that she sees in many of her clients all the time, which are very typical traits of autism:

Dream seemed to be genuine to the point he considered people his friends who aren’t and needs to probably develop a filter to know who he can trust and who he needs to guard himself from, including the internet. He needs to develop a separation being how he acts while under the microscope and how he acts in private around close people.

Dream genuinely seemed to not understand but was trying to and he asked for specific examples, which is hard for others to give, but he seemed to actually need those to understand.

He seemed to struggle with understanding the difference between intention and impact. Tubbo seemed more focused on the impact and Dream seemed focused on intention - well he didn’t intend for a certain outcome therefore he isn’t guilty or needs to address it.

In summary, she agreed with me that the issues of the conversation were such textbook autism. Something she’d worked with just about all of her clients as autistic people struggle with needing to understand what they did in order to take accountability and have the mindset that if their intention wasn’t bad then the impact doesn’t matter so much. Like most autistic people, what Dream could benefit from is learning the importance of impact and how for the non-autistic that is more important than intent and how he probably needs to filter his behavior a bit and not be so much of himself in public because he’s under such a microscope and some of his friends seem to not really be his friend.

So, basically she agreed with me overall, especially over the autism pieces present and I believe some of these things I’ve talked more in detail about, especially Impact vs Intention, so I’m gonna leave things here. Just thought I’d share her thoughts incase you were interested in what a psychologist who specializes in autism thinks of the situation. And just to be clear, this is all really her opinion so I’m not going to argue with it or whatever because I can’t speak for her, just thought I’d share it. :)

[max-nicoxfandom]

Some trauma/whump/abuse scenarios for you, because your character can be traumatized without having the literal joker for a parent. Like not all abuse is so outward, I would argue that most abuse looks more like this.

Feel free to add your own, this is just stuff I've experienced

Yelling. I don't mean being yelled at. I mean a child being in a household where their guardian is always stressed and always yelling. It puts your body in fight or flight mode for all of eternity, trust

Sex and other adult topics being discussed with or around a child before they can understand what they're talking about

In the same vein, adults talking about a child while right in front of their face, and not caring what they hear or believing that they don't understand what they're hearing (they always do)

Gaslighting. Phrases like "you dreamt that" "you're being too sensitive" "that never happened" "don't lie"(while telling the truth)

Guardians not supporting the child's interests, or even down right denouncing them, whether they do it by taking the interest away or insulting the child for participating or some secret third thing

Misplaced anger/adult taking out anger on the child

Food scarcity, specifically by refusing to buy food that a picky eater would eat, or not having enough money to keep food on the table

In a similar vein, buying luxury items like game systems, new clothes, TV's, etc, while not being able to afford to put food on the table (and if you want to be even cooler the guardian will make the child feel bad for complaining about not having basic needs met by pointing out all of their luxury items they've been bought, double points if the child didn't want or ask for any of it)

Being treated as a burden, or saying things like "you're too/so expensive" "you're so needy" "you're too spoiled"

Guardian A trying to turn their child against guardian B, making themselves look like the better caretaker or better person.

Guardian who treats their child as a friend, or overall not having enough boundaries between parent and child

Emotional absents. Being there, but never engaging with their child. On the flip side, forcing their kid to participate in something bc the guardian likes it, even if the child hates it

Parentifying their child or forcing them to take care of their household in an adult manner, like helping raise the other children, housework above their skill level, paying bills, etc

Lack of privacy. A guardian telling people about something the child doesn't want people to know about. It could be an embarrassing story, it could be about their sexuality, it could be something that sounds harmless

Physical abuse but only while inebriated, and being (what's at least perceived as) a good parent otherwise

Preventing a child from sleeping while they're tired/extreme sleep deprivation

Repeatedly breaking their trust, like not doing things they promised they would do, saying things they don't mean, bring people who don't like their child around their child, ect

Name calling

Feel free to add your own, or hop into my askbox !! It is always open !!