#outside the gender binary

[a-confused-loser-venting]

after years of identifying as non-binary, i think im starting to experience the judgement of not comforting or fitting the gender binary for other people.

i been managing living closeted with a masc style but now that im channeling both my femininity and masculinity it seems to be bothering people or confuses them more on who i am.

for everyone around me, one day im trying makeup, wearing a skirt and buying cute plushies, then the next day im wearing jorts, binding and listening to nu metal.

my mom actually said that “some crisis happened” just because i haven’t worn a skirt in a while when i have and still do.

i know the examples that im providing are very stereotypical, but thats only because i genuinely like those things. i dont see the things im doing either for girls or boys, i see them as things i like. for everyone im always changing one or the other when i just want to be both without everyone making it a big deal.

let me have baggy clothes and cute skirts and thigh highs. let me wear guyliner and lipstick. let me wear slutty lace panties and Five Nights at Freddy boxer briefs.

like, let me live my life!!

[just-your-average-tangerine]

The line between binary and nonbinary trans people is nowhere near as clean as some of yall think it is

[livinginadumpster]

The way Dead Boy Detectives handles queerness and labeling of sexuality is honestly so refreshing. The way it's handled makes is very obvious that it's not the kind of media in which characters are assumed straight until proven otherwise; the characters' sexualities are left undefined because the focus isn't on specific labels, it's on the relationships between characters.

As the show goes on, it becomes abundantly clear that the characters' sexualities are a non-factor. Sure, Jenny dates women, but a label is never put on that. Same with Edwin - he is clearly interested in men, but not once in the show is he labeled as gay. It's not necessary in either case; labeling these characters wouldn't add anything to their stories or character arcs. The show is completely relaxed about labels because they're almost never a part of or even relevant to the plot.

And so, in a show that is so utterly unconcerned with labels, it would also be exceeding strange to impose the label of "straight" on any character. Characters like Charles and Crystal, who clearly demonstrate attraction to the opposite gender, don't come across as strictly heterosexual, they come across as people experiencing human emotions. And a character like Niko, who never expresses romantic attraction to anyone, really can't be assumed heterosexual either, because it simply wouldn't be in line with what we know about her.

Heterosexuality never comes across as the default in this universe. It never seemed as if the writers automatically assumed any character, no matter how background, to be straight. Queerness is explored not as a defiance of the norm but as just another way of loving someone. In a world where being queer is always viewed as alternate or deviant, and where coming out is a lifelong process that begins again every time you meet someone new because you're always assumed cishet, this kind of complete abolishment of heteronormativity is a breath of fresh air. Seeing queerness handled in such a casual way onscreen honestly feels a little bit revolutionary.

[etz-ashashiyot]

Sorry not sorry, but if you're cis I'm 1000% uninterested in your hot takes on how much gendered privilege trans men have

I literally do not fucking care

[shoezuki]

hot take but 'choosing' to be a woman and present as a woman and be seen as a woman is the epitome of 'true' womanhood rather than the idea of a woman being innately. seeing urself and society and the binaristic construct of gender and saying 'i am a woman no matter what whether the world agrees with me or not' goes harder than anythin terfs can say

[penumbralwoods]

more nonbinary characters with absolutely no indication or confirmation of "which direction" they transitioned from nowwwwww

[vatt1vv]

I’m being a hater real quick. You trans women sy truthers have your fun I too enjoy imagining sy with tits…. HOWEVER it’s way too simple a solution to sy’s gender weirdness. He has way too much of a complicated relationship with gender for it to simply be ‘Teehee estrogen would save him’ break free from the gender binary embrace genderqueer sy

[yardsards]

think of a character that isn't canonically trans that you headcanon as being trans-masculine. (if you have multiple, just choose one arbitrarily or pick your favourite)

trans-feminine headcanon poll

[sovamurka]

i just KNOW that if sevika was a man, people would be shipping sevilco like crazy, making analysis of even tiniest bits of interactions, screaming "HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE ANYTHING BETWEEN THEM???"

[marihem]

All I know is I just want to spend the majority of my life with you

The actual very first doodle where I finally put my QPR Frans idea on canvas. Man I really love thinking about queer relationships

Please feel free to ask me anything about their relationship too

[kirkwallguy]

i do keep trying to write something meaningful about taash's storyline but i always get stumped when i try to talk about the conclusion because it's so insane. "hey btw my mother just died protecting me. she was an immigrant whose culture was deeply important to her which caused conflict between us because i left the country too young for it to have much significance to me. she would probably want me to do something with her body in a way that honoured the culture she most closely identified with. however i (the writer using my dragon age character as a mouthpiece) personally think that this culture is inferior regressive less nice to trans people so i feel icky about it :( should i just honour her in accordance to the culture that i feel is better personally because they (the three characters we see) respect my pronouns?" like. to be clear this is absolutely something the most out of touch person you know would say in the vent channel of a discord server. but i don't want to be rewarded with an armour for participating in it.

[diphowell]

dan calling himself a formless blob and having the announcer in tit make it clear formless blobs are nonbinary...

[speakercrab666]

"what are you" a cognitohazard. a co- do i really have to explain the SCP foundation to u rn. on tumblr dot com be so fr.

[townofcadence]

Happy Trans Day of Visibility 💛🧡💚

[synapple]

soooo fucked up that everyone’s too busy objectifying cicero and miraak to give a shit about the best character in skyrim (karliah thievesguild)

[nonbinarynow]

"It is fatal for anyone who writes to think of their sex. It is fatal to be a man or woman pure and simple; one must be woman-manly or man-womanly. It is fatal for a woman to lay the least stress on any grievance; to plead even with justice any cause; in any way to speak consciously as a woman. And fatal is no figure of speech; for anything written with that conscious bias is doomed to death. It ceases to be fertilized. Brilliant and effective, powerful and masterly, as it may appear for a day or two, it must wither at nightfall; it cannot grow in the minds of others. Some collaboration has to take place in the mind between the woman and the man before the art of creation can be accomplished. Some marriage of opposites has to be consummated. The whole of the mind must lie wide open if we are to get the sense that the writer is communicating his experience with perfect fullness."

- Virginia Woolf, A Room of Ones Own, 1929

I adore this quotation, not just as a womanist feminist, not just as a writer who seeks to write about experiences other than my own, but as a transandrogynous person, who understands the beautiful, natural creativity and empathy that mental androgyny lends me access to. The word is bipartite, dichotomised into a binary, where one must be better than the other. It is not in our nature to just hold two states, two things as equal. There will always be a victor and a failure. A better and a worse. But to choose to marry those two things into one, to force both to coexist in one life, to consciously (because as humans, it's in our nature, but consciously choosing this path is different) combine aspects of both into your everyday reshapes the mental experience into an androgynous one, with the ability to debinarise and marry every single little binarised thing; from the manner of blinking to the theory produced on the human condition and the science of life and creation.

In a world of binary dichotomies, to exist in a mental state that incooperates all aspects of the binary, to marry all of its silly divisions, to live as proof you dont have to lock your mind into "one or the other" brings forward the capability to expand ones own thinking long beyond what was previously thought, to access the "whole mind." To live as an androgynous, or at least as a being unaffiliated with the gender binary, shows an incredible ability to break away from the notion you must perceive, experience and live in the world only one way; it is the realisation that you are locking up half of your human experience. It is the realisation that you are falling into a pit of "pure simplicity." The death of new thought, the death of unity and the death of the complexities of human expression is surely inbound if not for beings of androgyny redefining the human experience out of these unmarriable dichotomies; man-womanliness and woman-manliness allows access to new perspectives on old concepts, and the birth of new ones. Birth that cannot happen in a mind confined to the rigidness that is binary thought. This is evidenced in real life, through people who live outside the binary, present outside the binary, transitionwithin the binary offering new perspectives to those who don't, and to all others who resist the binary.

This is the birth of new, beautiful, creative and expansive minds and communities. The breaking down of the rigid colonial capitalist thought that permeates all of society. Seeking empathy across false borders, the unity of all people, and the understanding between the man and the woman. Helping people realise that they are capable of androgynous thought despite being binary, by being someone who is a unification or a disassociation with it. Androgyny is universally understood in binary individuals, it helps them understand the opposite from their perspective. Helping them see that they are more similar than they think, but it will take active mental androgyny to help realise this fact. Helping the creativity, the empathy, the understanding "grow in the minds of others." Mental androgyny is radical in the sense that is the realisation of shared humanity, with baseless binarisation being a detriment to society. Below is my personal favourite quote on androgyny, ever.

"The androgynous mind is resonant and porous; that it transmits emotion without impediment; that it is naturally creative, incandescent, and undivided."

- Virginia Woolf, A Room Of Ones Own, 1929