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divinit3a · 1 month ago

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📝drabble: catch me! (if i fall) -> ao3 link 🌟sun x (a devious) assistant reader word count: 2423 chosen words: sparklers, cloud nine, honeydew, letting go, restart

here are the cafe prompts for fellas interested! the deadline for 'new beginnings' is jan 12, 2025 ;3c

“They're called sparklers,” You once told him. Nestled away in the darkness, the sparkle igniting the dim space like a strike of a match. He’s still not sure how you snuck the miniature fireworks into work that day, and he was never brave enough to ask in fear of the cheshire grin that would split across your face. Effectively making him your accomplice, as always. Wore that same grin that always told him he was going to loathe learning what you did this time that put your employment and his life on the line.

The low lighting of the evening tickled at their switch release. Sun hadn’t yet shifted into Moon, but his other half had been awakened and tugged at the dual AI until a presence pressed against his ‘mind.’ The rooftop was technically off limits to the attendant, but you insisted that a technicality was not enough to stop you.

You dragged him up the stairs, ‘against his will!’, the ‘innocent’ robot would cry with crocodile tears–but he knew that with a single lock of a knee joint, he could have stopped you. He always could've stopped you, but curiosity and intrigue were too devious to ignore.

”C-careful, you're going to start a fire!“ He remembers you laughing off his safety precautions, letting the sparkler continue to send of tiny sparks. The blitz of light danced across your face, sparkled in your eyes. That's what he always liked about you; a firecracker, a wild spirit who struck the whole ‘Plex like tornado scorned. Always bending the rules in a way that ignited his circuitry, without triggering a full reprimand. Teetering on the line.

A liability he could delete with one report. Saved a headache. And yet, the tightrope walk was too enthralling to cut short.

The air was bitter cold, turning each breath you took into wisps that mystified him. Like you were exhaling magic.

You'd stand up on the edge of the rooftop, walking along toe-by-toe, a fistful of sparklers in one hand. A fire-hazard. The attendant refused to light one of the hellish sticks, and instead followed right beside you. Matching each step. Reflexes engaged to catch you at any moment. Your actions always triggered their hypervigilance; a disaster sense tickling through his components.

You brushed your opposite hand against the grated fence that bordered the rooftop, laced fingers between each metal link as you stepped along.

A slight mis-step. The give of the fence was enough for it to fall down. A comet racing by as the anxiety surged in their wires, compelled to reach forward.

Wrapping arms around he tugged you backwards, stopping you from recklessly tumbling into danger. You'd laugh and tap away at his shoulder joints, insisting that it was all just in good fun, that you were always fine, that you were safe here. You’d file a maintenance ticket later to fix the fence, it really wasn’t a big deal.

That day, the sparklers slipped out of your grip, and fell two stories down. The bright lights snuffed out in a strong gust of wind. A stroke of luck, Sun scolded, as otherwise it could have started a fire in the parking lot. He remembers that you snorted out a laugh, and patted at his chest plate until he relaxed his grip and set you down.

You kept acting like nothing in the world bothered you, though he felt the quickened rhythm of you pulse from almost slipping and falling. Simply readjusted the scarf around your neck, and offered him a sparkler, fresh from the pack. Not giving in a single budge until he took it into his hand.

From your jacket pocket you pulled out a lighter, a deep violet one that was all scuffed up. With great trepidation, Sun squeezed his optics shut and let you light a sparkler for him, tipping it towards the small flame you lit with a click of the sparkwheel.

Even now, replaying the memory in his mind, he remembers how you cheered on that he was finally ‘loosening up a little.’ Sun let out a nervous chuckle, certain you’d be the end of him.

Yet, he clings on to the memory of opening his eyes to see how bright that light was. How it lit up the joy on your face, vivid and bright.

The feeling was electrifying. Addictive. The thrill of walking life on the edge; hopped up all the way to cloud nine.

-------

”Oh, it tastes sweet.“ You'd tell him, reading the robot's mind as it watched with fascination as you pecked away at your lunch. At first you put the employee discount to good use, tried out the fast-order tacos slopped with week-old sour cream and fizzy soda until realizing that it was a one-way ticket to stomach sickness. So now, the tupperware lids scattered around the play table. You wipe off your hands from the sticky residue, and offer the attendant a piece of honeydew.

Sun accepted the piece of food, as if it could ever matter to him. He turned it around between two pinched fingers, appraising the cubed piece of fruit. ”S-sweet?“ He asked, optics flickering up to look at you with an audible click. ”Are you sure, friend? It's all...“ His optics thin out, shutters lowering like eyelids that always caught a spark of light, drew you in to lean closer. Lacking a vaster vocabulary to rely on, the attendant settled on: ”Green. Like broccoli.“ He made a so-so gesture with his hand.

You pulled a face then sneakily slid a piece towards his static smile. The fruit tapped against their piano-key teeth, the snapped-close mask barring entry. A tingle dances across the faceplate, sensing the slightest shift in pressure. Detecting the cold temperature.

Optical sensors scan the fruit as you hold it to his ‘lips’: 90% water, 9% carbohydrates, 0.1% fat, and 0.5% carbohydrates. The sugar content was moderate, about 8-12 grams of sugar per 100 grams. He failed to grasp the appeal, and said as much through the whirring kicked up of fans.

“Too bad.“ You taunted. ”Guess you'll never understand how great it is.” You popped the piece of fruit onto your tongue instead, made a show of savoring the taste.

Taste. One of the few senses an entertainment automation certainly can’t replicate. As you chewed, you looked as smug as can be. A twinge of electricity nicked up his arms, caused fingertips to twitch with inaction.

The subtle interactions stacked up to an avalanche a tap away from tipping over and all falling down.

In the moment, he remembers laughing along, while redirecting extra coolant to his circuits to quiet down the betraying whirl of fans as he overheated. He tip-tapped his fingers together, then shifted the topic towards an easier one. One that made sense to the lines of code filtering through his system, simple and predictable. Unlike you.

“A-anyways, I was thinking that today's afternoon craft could be...” He started a long spiel about cardstock, glitter glue, and macaroni.

He noticed the way you'd subtly deflate, fiddled around with your notebook as you nodded along to the plans for the day.

-------

“Like this?” You held up the abomination of a craft. Glue dripped down the sopped piece of paper, colorful faux feathers pasted on without logic or forethought.

“Nonono, that’s all wrong!” The robot seethed, tugged at his rays, and you just laughed at his superficial anger. The way he’d stomp, and the ring of bells would ridicule his jester-themed tantrum.

“Alright, Mr. Perfect. Show me how its done.” You gestured to the craft supplies in front of you. He recalls the timestamp: Sunday, 3:42 pm, 18 minutes before you’d stall on leaving. Again.

Sun’s voicebox crackled out a few choice insults, all child-friendly, he’s sure. Lured over by your practiced and weaponized inadequacy, he’d set down the supplies and be pulled from his hellbent task of cleaning the Daycare for the fourth time today. Fell victim to your trivial distractions.

“Go on, enlighten me.” you’d tease with gusto, and his ruffles would bristle.

“Well, first off, you aren’t even putting the caps backbackback on the gluesticks—” You’d barely answer his rants, responded with quipped ‘uh-huh’s that grinded his gears. And yet you’d listen to every pointless word, resting your head against your palm as eyelids drooped. At ease.

With you around, he found that the weekends weren’t so boring anymore.

For better or worse.

-------

There were days you were quiet, too. Not like yourself– at first he thought, incorrectly. No, all aspects of you were you; as multifaceted as the attendant himself. With darker shadows, a botched attempt at purging a secondary AI. Recycled and restarted, and yet still imperfect.

Sun couldn’t find you on the shift most the day. Normally he’d tsk and hum and already have half an email drafted to send off to management, but he felt rather generous—and certainly not biased in his decision to spare you. He’d find you tucked into the alleyway directly behind the daycare, bypassing the emergency exit alerts with your clearance badge.

“Smoking is bad for your health,” Sun chided.

You startled, nearly dropping the lighter in your hands. The small flame warms your palms. A violet stain on your record.

“You should really let-let-let that badbadbad habit go, firefly.” The robot tsk’s, arms crossed as he leaned against the doorway to appear imposing. The firewalls blared in his mind not to take a step outside, as it would go against protocols and leave the daycare unattended during hours of operation.

You looked up at the nickname, interest piqued. Flicked the lighter closed, a small, damningly hopeful smile quirked at the edges of your lips. “Yeah, yeah. Preach to the choir, sunshine.” You bat the playful nickname right back, and his panels would shudder at the audacity twisted up in his circuits. Fingers curled into fists, rattling with underlaid frustrations.

“R-right. Well.” Sun scritched at his lowermost rays. “H-hurry back in, its cold outside, and your breakbreakbreak is over in three minutes!” Sun taps the lack of a watch on his wrist, jostling the bells there like a tambourine.

You bumped against the attendant as you walked past him in the doorway, unbothered by his spindly silhouette.

“Oh, right. Sun?” His neck hinge swiveled, locking eyes. Rays shrunk back, waiting for your next remark.

“Thanks for looking out for me,” you said with a wink.

The attendant stammered as you cackled and walked away, lacking a pre-programmed retort to put up with your hijinks. The hot and cold act that left his wires bunched up into a mess. The intricacies of human behavior often went beyond his programming, but Sun could pinpoint a rulerbreaker with ease. He was sure he rushed you indoors, hands lingering on the cold of your shoulders just a little while longer than necessary to warm you back up.

-------

It happened when he was trying to restock the supply closet. An incident he refused to report to save out on his own pride.

Now, the animatronic was taller than the average human, but the storage layout in the ‘Plex was absurd even for robotic standards. Multi-leveled, crates and boxes, all shoved into the warehouse out back. Ladders with wheels attached type deal. Sun tried to catalogue the health-code violations, but his programming set up proxies and wiped the data each time.

Beneath him, you waited impatiently and held the ladder to keep it steady. In Sun’s opinion the menial task was better than watching you roll the supply cart back and forth, played the squeaky wheels like a fiddle. Now that was a service ticket worth sending in — that the cart’s wheels needed a good oiling. After all, idle hands make for idle minds, and you are too much to leave unattended.

“Find it yet?” You called up, louder than necessary. His rays retracted, audio input peeked by your shout. He shook their head, resetting the input levels to neutral.

“A-almost, just need a few more–” Sun reached out to grab a crate with one arm, confident in the circuitry and hydraulics that powered his arms to handle the weight.

Yet the briefest flicker in the power was enough to toggle the inbetween state between him and Moon, gears grinding and power reserves swapping tempos. The sudden flash was like being struck by lightning, agonizing and leaving their wires tingling as if burnt.

He let go of the ladder. He was falling.

The impact was softer than he imagined. And noisier, too.

“Caught you,” You laughed, arms encircled around their scrawny waist as you held them up from crashing into the concrete floor below. The buttons of their chestplate dug into your work uniform. The devious grin he was so enamored by cracked across your face like a thunderbolt. Maybe you knew, and just wanted to cheer him up.

The attendant was shockingly lightweight, a fact you’d deviously keep in mind for later. You acted as if blissfully unaware of the severity of the moment, the possibility of what would unfold should the power have went off for good, or should they have landed and dinged up their chassis over boxes of pom-poms and silly scissors.

“I—I—You are insufferable!” Sun sputtered.

“Easy there, sunshine. You’ll blow a fuse.” You leaned the attendant back, righting his frozen posture. “See? No harm, no foul.” You brushed the bits of dust and debris off his shoulder mechanisms, paused to feel the delicate thrum of intricate machinery beneath the outer casings.

The touch lingered as you zoned in on the humming. He remembers that part clearly, the most confusing of all.

“Hey, Sun?” You asked to cut through the shared silence. Voice soft as feathers.

The attendant leaned in closer, circuits pumped to overdrive with anticipation.

“Its 4:08. Do you think they’d pay me overtime if I stick out another hour?” You asked, cheekily aware of the extent of your damages to their emotional processors. He would reel back, reprimanded you for staying past clock-out time. The hardwired programming won out against the clockwork in their chest that just wouldn’t calm down, even as he walked you to the exit, raving all the while about your poor work ethic as you grinned.

Sun remembers spending the rest of the day in a daze, too starstruck by the encounter to accomplish much else.

How he felt anything besides hatred for you, unpredictable, firecracker, wonderful you, the attendant would never be able to calculate or comprehend.

#whoa...? a fluffy drabble...? from me...? no suffering...? Wild. Sugary sweet!#much fun. much sillies. i think this is the first drabble ive posted to tumblr? ? ? :0 Hi !!!#fnaf dca #dca fandom #sun fnaf #sun x y/n #sun x reader #x reader #pom draws #pom writes #cafeprompts2025 #dca community

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suzukiblu · 18 days ago

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WIP excerpt for Jan behind the cut; “YJ packs up and gets pupped”. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“You are presenting, and you have chosen to do it in the base,” Red Tornado says. “Presumably you chose to do that because Project Cadmus lacked something you require for the process.”

“I . . .” Kon hesitates again, biting the inside of his lip. “I just–I just didn’t wanna do it there, okay? That’s��s’all.”

Red Tornado looks at him. Kon really wishes the guy had a scent that he could read. Or like–at least a fucking expression or something. Like just–literally anything, right now.

“You appear to be nesting,” Red Tornado observes. “Are you an omega, then?”

“. . . I guess,” Kon mumbles, swallowing roughly. And it feels–it feels weird, saying it to someone. Even after saying it to himself and the Super-Cycle already.

Red Tornado can tell him what he thinks about him saying that to him, is the thing. And whatever he thinks, it’s not going to be what Kon thinks himself.

Like–obviously it’s not, yeah.

“You are in possession of sufficient nesting material, then?” Red Tornado asks, and Kon tries not to bristle. It’s–it’s just a question, maybe. Probably. Not one he knows why Red Tornado’s asking, but–just a question.

Unless it’s a trap, anyway.

“I just–borrowed some stuff,” he says without saying anything about–about just what he’s really “borrowing”, and he maybe sounds a little bit too defensive about it, but . . . but that’s all he did, dammit. He didn’t do anything–bad or anything. “S’all. I’ll scent-scrub all the pheromones and shit off when I’m done, alright? I’m not messin’ anything up or anything, it’s fine.”

They wouldn’t care, he tries to say, but he doesn’t know–he doesn’t actually know that. Doesn’t actually know if . . . if they’d care. If they’d–mind.

Would they be mad, if they found out he came to the base to present and then tracked down and took all their scents? Like–without asking, or . . .

They’re not a pack. And the others all have packs. And in all their heads he’s just, like, the stupid bruiser teammate who’s only barely a friend that none of them trust to be in charge of the team even though he’s literally the only one who actually has been in charge of a team before and who they probably all think’s an alpha anyway and–and–

“Yes,” Red Tornado says. “But is ‘some stuff’ sufficient for your nest?”

“I . . .” Kon–falters, kinda, and maybe sinks in on himself a little again. Does–does it look that bad? He knows he didn’t get much stuff for it, but–but if it looks that bad . . .

“Kathy prefers to layer her nests with multiple fabrics and cushioning,” Red Tornado says. “And Traya and her friends line theirs with plush toys when engaging in playing ‘house’ together. I am otherwise unfamiliar with the necessary components of their construction.”

“. . . oh,” Kon realizes, and feels a little less–a little less embarrassed, at least. At least if Red Tornado doesn’t really know how it’s supposed to go either . . . well, he can’t think it looks that bad, if he doesn’t really know. Right? “Uh–I don’t . . . I dunno. I never . . . did it, before.”

Red Tornado tilts his head. Kon represses a cringe, trying not to bristle. Well–he wasn’t presented before, so . . . so why would he have?

“I was under the impression that most omega pups experience a compulsion to nest even before their presentation,” Red Tornado says.

“Well, I didn’t,” Kon snaps at him, digging his fingers into Cassie’s folded-up shirt and–and not-really-on-purposely pinning it against his chest.

Hugging it against his . . . against his . . .

He’d just–he’d just . . . thought about it, a couple times. But he . . . he hadn’t felt any stupid compulsions or . . .

Kon thinks about how many times he’d thought about nesting, and how many times he’d thrown all his blankets in the corner and made himself sleep on a half-stripped bed and nothing else, and how many times he’d thrown every blanket he could find on his bed and slept under them all at once, and how he’d always . . . always folded his jacket into a pillow, when he was . . . when he was . . . sleeping somewhere else, like on the road or on shoots or in the field or . . .

He thinks about how many times he’d wanted to . . . wanted to watch one of those nesting videos, but–hadn’t.

Then he thinks about crying, maybe.

“I thought I was gonna be an alpha,” he croaks, trying to figure out if–if this makes him a bad omega after all, or–or something. If he didn’t . . . didn’t nest before, or . . . “I thought I . . . thought I . . .”

I thought I HAD to be an alpha, Kon doesn’t say, but it’s all he can think.

#kon el #conner kent #superboy #red tornado #wip: yj packs up and gets pupped #omegaverse #jan

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thebiscuitlabryinth · 1 year ago

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"...We're two sides of the same coin, aren't we?"

The whispered confession falls clumsily out of Pure Vanilla's mouth, almost dragged out, bitterly sweet and strange on his tongue. The words are addressed to his own stained candy glass visage, spilling tendrils of bright blue light across the Solarium of Unity despite the almost suffocating darkness invading the rest of the space.

He knows this isn't really the Solarium of Unity, and he knows he isn't just speaking to a window. The lurking shadows, thick like molasses and blinking every once in a while, give that away. Even if it didn't, there is a haziness here that exists only in dreams, and a lack of the deep tiredness that has been plaguing him as of late.

"Oh, are you finally ready to admit that?" Sure enough, Shadow Milk Cookie's voice comes from all sides, far too cheerful. The candy glass melts and warps before him, the blues darkening until Shadow Milk stands in his place, far more detailed than the artisan silhouette he replaced. His grin is mocking as he looks down at Pure Vanilla, who cannot help but feel uncomfortable at the sight of their appearances blurring together like that, even though he had been expecting something along those lines. "Too bad though – you can't admit something that's wrong!"

"Huh?" It catches Pure Vanilla by surprise. It had been difficult emotionally, but logically straightforward to admit they were two sides of the same coin. He couldn't imagine how that could be wrong, and acting upon an old habit from his student days, he finds himself frantically unravelling that conclusion in his head again to figure out the issue.

Shadow Milk doesn't give him the chance, tutting as he shakes his head in mock disappointment. "You must have a brain in there, can't you use it?" He laments theatrically, contorting himself into an odd shape against the edge of the window pane. Then, again barreling on before Pure Vanilla can reply, "Look, think of it like this. To say we're two sides of the same coin means that we have similarities, even if we are otherwise opposites. That is true to an extent, but it makes our differences sound way more clear cut than they actually are. It may be easier for you to believe, but we aren't really opposites. That would imply I am not whole, and I can assure you, Soul Jam aside, I am just as I always was!"

Ah, so it's a matter of wording. Pure Vanilla isn't sure why he is entertaining this - no, it's because he doesn't want to give Shadow Milk the satisfaction of turning away from the truth. Even now, Shadow Milk's eyes squint cheekily at him, daring him to try and end the conversation.

"Then... we are made of the same components in a different composition." Pure Vanilla tries, a little frustrated with his own hesitance, but it is difficult to tell how Shadow Milk wants him to answer when he isn't making it blatantly obvious.

"So close!" Shadow Milk sighs dramatically as he snaps his head to the side so sharply it makes Pure Vanilla wince, imagining the cracks that would cause on any other Cookie. "But you're relying on technicalities. It's much simpler than that."

It dawns on Pure Vanilla, then, exactly what Shadow Milk is aiming for, the realisation making his insides crawl. He doesn't have to say it, not really, but he isn't sure what Shadow Milk will do if he doesn't, and he unfortunately doesn't have the ability to wake himself up on command.

So he takes a deep breath, fidgeting with his staff as he says, even less than a whisper yet twice as loud. "We're... We're the same. Is that what you wanted me to say?"

"Ding-ding-ding!" Shadow Milk trills, suddenly reaching through the candy glass to grip the window frame and lurching forward across the threshold, leaving a mess of shattered glass behind his head like a halo. It startles Pure Vanilla, who instinctively shifts his foot back, only to be instantly locked in place as the reaching shadows soldify around his legs, its eyes winking up at him playfully. His grip on his staff tightens, willing it to shed its light, the beginnings of panic stirring within him at the restraint. The staff does, but the shadows seem to eat the light without a problem.

Pure Vanilla is so distracted by the shadows that he doesn't notice Shadow Milk's hands until they grab his face. His heart jumps in alarm, and his eyes dart up to find half of Shadow Milk leaning down out of the window, far too close. He is grinning at him, wide and self-satisfied, and his hands are cold and harsh. "See, I knew you had a working brain! Yes, the right answer is that we are one and the same."

He pinches and pulls at his cheeks, and Pure Vanilla tries to cringe away, tries to manuver his staff between them. It doesn't work, if only because hands emerge from the darkness to anchor his staff too.

"But that isn't true." Pure Vanilla mumbles when he isn't able to wiggle his way out and Shadow Milk still shows no signs of stopping, hoping the argument will make him lose interest in his face. "I admit that there are similarities between us, but we aren't really the same."

Shadow Milk pauses, his grip tightening until it borders on pain, and for a moment, Pure Vanilla thinks he may have miscalculated.

But then Shadow Milk snickers to himself, releasing his face entirely and pulling back, his hands resting lightly over Pure Vanilla's shoulders. The brush of weight keeps Pure Vanilla from relaxing, but it is a bit of added distance, at least.

"Aren't we? Well, you are the biggest liar, so I should have expected you would lie to yourself too." Shadow Milk hums, almost sounding delighted at this turn in conversation. It unnerves Pure Vanilla, because he had assumed his disagreement would annoy him.

Instead, Shadow Milk smirks, his many eyes glinting gleefully at him. "Listen carefully, Vani, because here's the truth." He says, his voice dipping into a wicked purr that seems to shudder through Pure Vanilla's whole body. "All the things you hate that I have done, you have the capability of doing too. After all, you've already used people for your own gain, haven't you?" Shadow Milk leans closer with a condescending lilt to his words, shifting his hands so he can wrap his arms loosely over his shoulders, and Pure Vanilla freezes under the touch. "Oh, I know you think it was necessary, but you still sent those naive, tiny Cookies off to carry out your errands for you, regardless of the dangers. That's only a few steps behind what I've done, you know, making people dance to my tune. The only difference between us is severity and time."

The words sink heavily to Pure Vanilla's stomach, not quite true but not quite not true, and he feels a little lightheaded, fingers twitching against his staff. Maybe it's because of that, or maybe it's because of his discomfort from the close proximity, but he finds himself distracted by the way Shadow Milk is talking. He carries his usual air of showmanship, but it is nowhere near as exaggerated as during his brief takeover of the Faerie Kingdom. With his insistence of specificity, his mention of technicalities, his structured method of explaining things, he almost sounds like a–

"We are the same," Shadow Milk repeats, tilting his head to the side, the glow of his eyes burning holes through Pure Vanilla, "and one day, you'll end up just like me."

A scholar.

That makes sense – at some point, his virtue had been Knowledge, and nobody seeks it out as fervently as a scholar – but it still feels like a surprise. Pure Vanilla had always known that Shadow Milk was different, once, but only in the sense that the fact existed in the back of his mind.

"No rebuttal, hmm? Are you ready to accept that?" Shadow Milk asks smugly, slightly impatient with Pure Vanilla's lack of response, but mostly watching him expectantly, as if waiting for a bomb to go off.

Pure Vanilla has never thought about what Shadow Milk might have been like, before he became like this. There was no reason to even consider it. But now, he can't help but wonder, because while he cannot imagine this chaotic, brutal Beast, this great unknown evil, as anything else – Shadow Milk still carries echoes from a past life that he doesn't seem to notice enough to hide with his lies.

"...If we are the same," Pure Vanilla finally scrapes his thoughts together enough to reply, carefully, "then doesn't that make the opposite possible too? That, one day, you will become like me and return to the light?"

Shadow Milk blinks once, his face falling blank. He blinks again, all of his eyes in quick succession.

And then he throws his head back and laughs, the movement jostling Pure Vanilla in the process with his arms still firmly around his shoulders. It sounds unhinged, ricocheting across the room, but it is openly amused. It makes Pure Vanilla antsy, especially with how it rings in his ears like an explosion from their closeness.

He wonders if Shadow Milk's laugh was different, before everything. It must have been. He wonders what it sounded like, and immediately realises that he's being ridiculous. The realisation that a before exists seems to have opened the floodgates in his mind, and now thoughts of hypotheticals can't help flitting in.

"You say such silly, silly things." Shadow Milk bites out offhandedly as his laughter winds down, the lingering remnants still dancing on his tongue. Without warning, he pulls Pure Vanilla even closer, the darkness that had been keeping him in place swirling and shoving him forward. Pure Vanilla gasps, the sound catching in his throat, and one of his hands fly off his staff to reach for something to steady himself on. It finds an edge of shattered candy glass, flinching back and falling down to scrabble against its smooth, intact surface.

Shadow Milk is giggling at him and Pure Vanilla is mortified, horribly so. They are far, far too close, Shadow Milk's face taking up the near entirety of his vision and their upper bodies almost pressed together. It feels claustrophobic, which should be impossible in such a wide, open space.

Shadow Milk makes matters worse by pressing their foreheads together, the gesture weirdly tender and doing nothing to make Pure Vanilla any calmer. His bright blue eyes look directly through him, dissecting him piece by piece.

"Why don't you cut down the Silver Tree and find out?" Shadow Milk coos, his voice overlapping with the Light of Truth's in a deeply unsettling way. His presence is overwhelming.

Pure Vanilla's eyes flicker downwards to escape his piercing gaze, and finds their chests so close that their Soul Jams are overlapping. Overlapping, and not touching, because Shadow Milk's Soul Jam seems to fizzle out of existence where the other makes contact with it, as if it were an illusion. Behind it is an empty space, black as the abyss. With the way they are lined up now, it is obvious that Pure Vanilla's Soul Jam would fit perfectly into the crevice with a little turning. He knew that already, but it still feels strange to see it.

Pure Vanilla sighs, a long, thin, shuddering sound. "...You didn't truly believe that would work, did you?"

In the edge of his vision, Shadow Milk smiles tauntingly, all teeth, but he doesn't say a word.

And Pure Vanilla wakes up, off kilter, exhausted and oddly cold.

[next]

#sm flirting: hey wanna debate the fluidity of ur identity and morality and have a crisis? wanna make out over it?#if ur confused dw i was confused writing this too. sm strikes me as the type to say the most convulted stuff for funsies #also he is scheming. idk what exactly but he certainly is!!#and poor pv is just along for the ride #pure vanilla cookie #shadow milk cookie #shadowvanilla #vanilla milkshake #echo paradox au #the biscuit library

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vamphorica · 5 months ago

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MellodraMattic and Queerness: An Essay

Before I begin, I need to make it clear that my thoughts on this subject are directly inspired by this post by overkeehl. I not only recommend but insist that you read it before continuing, as I am going to be exploring a small component of the greater idea that they have already established. Essentially, I am taking the idea of Mello's character being queer-coded and developing it in regards to how MellodraMattic becomes a very validating ship in the context of marginalised sexual and gender identities.

I am also going to touch on internalised queerphobia, so consider this as a warning if that's not something you fancy reading about.

Anyway.

Mello is a distinctly queer character. I don't say this from an entirely projective approach because I think there are plenty of examples throughout Death Note where Mello's visual presentation and characterisation signifies it. His androgyny is the most explicit indicator of nonconformity in relation to traditional gender expression. I fondly remember when I first read Death Note, aged ten, and was convinced that Mello was a girl for several pages. Suffice to say, Mello's appearance is rather ambiguous, making him an adaptable character for one to project queerness onto. We will go into more depth on this later on.

It is also worth mentioning that Mello's style is quite camp. I love the way he dresses and only wish I had the confidence to pull off his outfits, but they are also very ridiculous and inconvenient. One of my Top 10 Mello Moments Ever is when he tails Mogi and Misa, wearing this:

Those sunglasses are doing absolutely nothing to keep him out of sight, but I appreciate the fact that he obviously thinks otherwise. He simply must serve cunt to the detriment of the task at hand.

If I have not convinced you that his style alone is a good hint that he is a queer character, even in the most general sense of the term, there's plenty within Mello's character context that isn't exactly subtle in how he is portrayed as evidently nonconformist. I do think you have to be careful not to equate certain traits with queerness when it may not be appropriate to do so (after all, there's many characteristics relating to neurodiversity that can be identified in those who originated from Wammy's House, and while I won't get into the whole discussion about the overlap there because it's not my place to do so, I also think it would be an interesting subject to explore).

However, it is completely understandable why a lot of queer people see themselves in Mello. As a child, around the age that I think many begin to explore their sense of self, Mello's identity is ultimately threatened by L's death. He is confronted by the prospect of working with (accepting) Near in order to catch Kira. Instead, he runs away, and the narrative that follows is of a man tied up in complex feelings relating to his identity as a 'runner-up'. To put it simply, it conveys queer grief very well — Mello struggles with the fact that who he is as an individual does not align with the expectation that Wammy's House instilled in him from a young age. Similarly, some queer people may find that they must contend with accepting an identity they had been discouraged from exploring as children.

I think for many queer people seeing themselves in Mello, this sense of shame that can be identified as internalised homophobia or transphobia is unfortunately a common experience. It can take a long time to recognise, let alone challenge the societal standards that have been deemed 'normal' or 'correct'. Mello encapsulates this disconnect well in the sense that his goal to defeat Near as a means to prove himself as a worthy successor to L is doomed from the beginning. He was never meant to be the one to become L, and yet he runs straight to his demise in his desperation to receive recognition from an institution that he could never succeed within. I am not suggesting that all queer people go through this level of intense self denial when exploring their identities, but I think it ought to be appreciated that through Mello, there are a plenty of parallels that reflect the complexities of discovering your sexuality and gender identity.

Additionally, if you'll excuse me posting two rather grim examples of objectification in the manga, it is worth noting that Mello, in close proximity to two naked women, does not seem remotely interested in their bodies, which might suggest a queer identity on a very shallow level. I do think, given how misogynistic almost all the male (and some of the female) characters in Death Note can be, Mello is notable in the sense that he doesn't actively discriminate against the female characters. He treats both genders like shit. Feminist icon.

Mello is very easy to project an assortment of queer identities onto. For what it's worth, I headcanon him as bisexual and FtM, but I know you are not reading this essay for my personal projections. You can consider Mello as MtF, asexual, gay, nonbinary — all of these identities can easily be validated within the canon context because Mello is so versatile while still being a developed and nuanced character. His story mirrors so much of the struggle that queer people contend with, and while I think it is a massive shame that it isn't resolved, I think that in itself only exemplifies the complicated nature of identity.

So, where does Matt come into all of this?

It is important to remember that Matt as a character was created for Mello. In the main series, it isn't even mentioned that Matt is a Wammy's kid, this information only being revealed in 'Death Note 13: How to Read'. However, this is crucial knowledge because it conveys the very essence of what makes MellodraMattic so great.

I love Mello, I really do, but he is cruel and selfish, in addition to being arguably one of the most dangerous characters in the series. For those who might relate to him for any of the reasons I have given thus far, it is still important to understand that Mello is not a decent person. He is deeply flawed, and as much as I like to joke that his crimes are perfectly fine actually, I can still appreciate that he is not meant to be regarded as an 'good' character, even if he is on the right side as far as Kira is concerned. His behaviour is very much correlated with his sense of inferiority, so in this case, his identity struggles do not excuse his behaviour, but they can explain it.

Yet, despite all of this, Matt remains by his side, regardless. While there's a general consensus that the two were separated for some time after Mello ran away, they eventually reunite and work together. In these brief moments, we can still gain a good insight into their relationship dynamic from the way they speak to one another. For instance, Matt is cheeky in a manner that the reader would not expect Mello to tolerate. Yet the patience in how he responds to Matt's insolence almost appears uncharacteristic. I am of the belief that Mello is not a highly reactionary character, despite how the series tries to portray him as such, and this calm composure he is capable of can best be seen through his interactions with Matt.

There is a real familiarity between the two men that I don't think is comparable to any other relationship in Death Note. For example, in the image below, Matt is complaining about a task Mello has assigned him, one that isn't exactly difficult, and yet he's already distracted. Rather than get frustrated, a response we would expect from Mello, he answers Matt gently.

I appreciate these moments are few and far between (for fuck's sake, there's only two panels that feature the both of them) but I don't think I'm reading into it too much. I think they're genuinely suited for each other, which is, of course, because Matt was written for Mello. Their chemistry is dependent on the latter canonically.

Matt brings out the more approachable side of Mello because Mello does not see Matt as a threat that he must remain guarded around. If we as readers have become acquainted with Mello through his act of cruelty, albeit as a means of survival, we must assume Matt is familiar with this side of Mello, too. However, it doesn't deter Matt, nor does it scare him. Matt is completely loyal to the very end, and while such writing is perhaps a little superficial, I think it does emphasise the point that Mello has someone who will put his life on the line for him and God, I don't know. I think you have to read that as love to at least some extent.

Mello is a complicated character, with plenty of attributes suggesting that he is queer. This only further contributed to his plot line that centres an identity struggle, which speaks to those who fall outside of cishetnormativity. Unable to reconcile his sense of self with the expectations placed upon him, Mello becomes ruthless. Yet, in spite of these flaws, he has Matt. He represents a kind of hope, I think, that those who connect to Mello through his queerness and subsequent struggles can gravitate towards. A hope that there's someone who will accept every aspect of your identity regardless, that there will be someone you can be yourself around.

To me, MellodraMattic is my favourite ship because I love Mello and Matt, and the way in which they interact with one another. It is also that initial identification with Mello, that makes Matt's character and their relationship more meaningful, an example of the fact that there'll always be someone who not only accepts, but loves you, regardless of the mess.

I think that's beautiful. 🍫🎮

#mello #mihael keehl #matt #mail jeevas #mellodramattic #death note #analysis #my essay #queer #text post

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srslyblvck · 7 months ago

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idiot in love, sirius black

pairing: sirius black x fem!reader

synopsis: sirius black was used to people falling for him. With his roguish good looks, effortless charm, and reputation as a prankster, he had never lacked attention from his classmates. but he had never anticipated how his world would turn upside down when he was paired with you in Potions class.

genre: fluff

warnings: mentions of y/n

word count: 0.9k

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ THE MOMENT PROFESSOR SLUGHORN announced the new pairings, Sirius glanced over at you with a curious smile. You were known for being quiet, keeping to yourself and your close friends. As you approached the shared workstation, he could see a mix of apprehension and determination in your eyes.

“Looks like we’re partners,” he said, offering a hand. “I’m Sirius.”

You took his hand with a small smile. “I know. I’m Y/n.”

He found your calm demeanour refreshing. You weren’t fawning over him or trying to impress him. You were simply there to work.

Sirius was surprised by how focused you were. You meticulously prepared the ingredients, your brow furrowed in concentration. He watched, fascinated, as you carefully measured out each component, explaining your reasoning with a quiet confidence.

“Are you always this serious in Potions?” he teased lightly, trying to draw you out.

You glanced up, a hint of a smile playing on your lips. “Only when I’m trying not to blow anything up.”

He chuckled, feeling an unexpected warmth in his chest. There was something about your unassuming nature that intrigued him.

As the days passed, Sirius found himself looking forward to Potions class more than ever. He watched you work, admiring the way your hair fell over your face as you leaned over the cauldron, the way your eyes sparkled with determination, and the soft smile you gave when something went right.

He tried to impress you with his charm and wit, but he quickly realized that you valued effort and sincerity over flashy antics. So, he started paying more attention to the lessons, genuinely trying to contribute to your shared work.

One day in Potions, Sirius was paired with Remus Lupin. You were working on your own potion when you felt his eyes on you. Glancing up, you saw Sirius staring, a dreamy look on his face. You tried to focus on your work, but his gaze was distracting.

"Sirius, could you add a drop of the dragon's blood?" Remus asked, not noticing his friend's distraction.

"Yeah, sure," Sirius mumbled, his eyes still locked on you. Without looking, he poured the entire vial into the cauldron.

"Sirius! No!" Remus shouted, but it was too late.

The potion exploded, sending a cloud of green smoke billowing through the classroom. Chaos erupted as students coughed and fanned the air, trying to clear the smoke.

Professor Slughorn rushed over, his face a mix of concern and exasperation. "What happened here?"

Sirius looked sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck. "I... might have added a bit too much."

"A bit?" Remus muttered, glaring at his friend.

You couldn't help but laugh at the situation. Sirius's antics were ridiculous, but there was something charming about his cluelessness. He glanced over at you, and seeing you laugh seemed to make his embarrassment worth it.

Sirius was confused by his feelings at first. He had never been this invested in anyone before. He tried to deny it, to brush it off as a fleeting crush. But every time he saw you, his heart told him otherwise.

He found himself doing little things for you—saving you a seat, bringing you your favourite snacks from the kitchen, and even trying and failing to help you with your Herbology homework. His friends noticed his change in behaviour and teased him endlessly, but he didn’t care. He was smitten.

The Gryffindor common room was buzzing with the usual evening activities. Sirius was sitting with a dreamy look on his face, staring into the fire. His mind was clearly elsewhere, and his friends couldn't help but notice.

"Oi, Padfoot, earth to Sirius!" James called, waving a hand in front of Sirius's face. "Where's your head at, mate?"

Sirius blinked and shook his head, trying to focus. "What? Oh, nothing. Just thinking."

Remus smirked, lowering his book. "Thinking about a certain Potions partner, perhaps?"

Peter giggled, nearly choking on a bean. "You mean the one he's been mooning over for weeks now?"

Sirius glared at them, though the blush creeping up his cheeks betrayed him. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, come off it, Padfoot," James said, grinning. "We've all seen the way you look at Y/n. It's like you're a lovesick puppy."

Remus chuckled. "More like a lost puppy. Following her around everywhere, getting distracted in class. It's quite adorable, really."

Peter nodded enthusiastically. "Remember when he blew up the cauldron because he couldn't stop staring at her? Classic."

Sirius groaned, running a hand through his hair. "Can we not talk about that? It was just a mistake."

"Sure it was," James said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "A mistake that just so happened because you were too busy making googly eyes at Y/n."

Sirius threw a cushion at James, who dodged it with a laugh. "Shut up, Prongs. At least I don't spend my free time staring at Lily and scribbling her name in my notebook."

James's face turned red, but he quickly recovered. "Touché, Padfoot. But we're not talking about me. We're talking about you and your undeniable crush."

Sirius couldn't but shake his head as they continued to tease him.

As the term went on, Sirius accepted his feelings. He didn’t confess them outright, afraid of ruining the delicate balance between you. Instead, he let his actions speak for him, hoping that you would see the depth of his affection.

Every glance, every smile, and every shared moment was a testament to how deeply he had fallen for you. He hoped that, in time, you would come to feel the same way.

And maybe, just maybe, you were already starting to.

#wizarding world #wizarding world fanfic #marauders #marauders fanfic #james potter #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #sirius black #sirius orion black #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black x reader #fluff

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homunculus-argument · 1 year ago

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If you're on the autistic spectrum, you probably have at some point been a part of a group conversation discussing some subject, and you notice that some large key element of the subject has not even been mentioned. So you decide to be the one to bring it up, in case the other people present were not aware of this big important component at play. And when you do, the neurotypical people present start scoffing and roll their eyes, tell you that everyone already knew that, and act insulted and get sarcastic at you, and you have no idea what the hell that was about.

Anyway, if that's ever happened to you, I might be able to break this down. I have no idea if that's of any help, but here I go nonetheless:

Neurotypical people tend to assume that the things that they consider to be obvious are also obvious to everyone else. As their thought processes tend to consistently follow very similar patterns, this assumption is correct enough - in a room full of neurotypicals, everyone assumes that everyone else has noticed the same things, and assumes that they don't need to be clearly and specifically pointed out at all.

This kind of "obviously obvious" things form the invisible bottom layer of the way neurotypicals talk to each other. The top layer is what they explicitly say with words, and the second layer is an underlying message that they consider to be too obvious to say directly. For example, asking someone if they need help with something comes with the implied statement "I don't think you are capable of doing this on your own", and if the person being asked is clearly capable of doing the task on their own, it means "I think that you are so helpless in general that you might as well not even know how to do this, either", which is considered massively insulting.

A third layer comes from where and when something is said. Offering to help someone with something that you thought they should be able to do on their own is insulting enough in private, but doing it in public means that you aren't just telling one person "I don't respect you", you are making it clear to everyone who witnesses it that you want everyone to know that you don't respect this person, or that you don't think they're capable of any kind of a meaningful retribution for being insulted like that.

So, wrapping this all back together, sometimes when neurotypical people don't openly aknowledge something that's very important when discussing a subject, there's a chance that they're not oblivious to the importance of that specific component, but have simply all silently agreed that one would need to be an idiot to not be aware of it, and therefore it does not need to be brought up at all. So even when you are trying to genuinely make sure that you are all on the same page, you have offered to help them understand the subject - which they take as your way of letting them know that you don't think they're smart enough to do that on their own.

So they hear this as you saying "I think everyone in this room is a fucking idiot, and I don't respect any of you enough to pretend otherwise, nor do I care who knows it." And that's why they get mad for no reason.

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valuentumbrian · 1 month ago

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How Does 37% Sound?

Image: The Schwab U.S. Large Cap Growth ETF (SCHG) is up more than 37% so far in 2024.

By Brian Nelson, CFA

How does 37% sound? That was the price-only performance of the Schwab U.S. Large Cap Growth ETF (SCHG) thus far in 2024. Over the preceding 5-year period, the SCHG is up over 140%.

For years, I have pounded the table on the theory that there are not value or growth stocks, but rather undervalued, fairly valued, or overvalued stocks. It’s why many growth stocks can be undervalued. It’s the Theory of Universal Valuation found in Value Trap that ties myriad areas of finance to the well-known discounted cash-flow [DCF] model. Growth is a component of value. Hook, line, and sinker.

For years, I have been pounding the table on large cap growth as my favorite area for idea generation (given its Valuentum stock tendencies), and I have put my money where my mouth is, too, with a meaningful portion of my net worth in SCHG. You’ll find that a lot of the top holdings in SCHG are top considerations in the Best Ideas Newsletter portfolio, too, so there’s some good overlap between what I consider Valuentum stocks and where I’m putting my money.

But why don’t I actually own all the stocks I like? It’s the question I have been asked for more than a decade. Here’s what I wrote back in September 2023. I’m an old school analyst that cut my teeth in this business following the Global Analyst Settlement, meaning I believe that writers should generally not be taking stakes in the individual stocks they write about. Writers with positions in the stocks they write about can lead to biased research, or worse, terrible outcomes.

So what’s the playbook for 2025? You can probably guess that I think large cap growth and big cap tech will continue to lead the markets to new heights. 2024 was a boring year, if a 37% return can be considered boring for large cap growth. Frankly, with the market focusing on macro data and the Fed during 2024, there wasn’t much material to write about. We all already know the story: Inflation is under control, the job market remains healthy, the Fed is cutting, and artificial intelligence will be the name of the game this decade.

I think it’s worth clarifying some of our offerings every now and then, as each one focuses on a unique vertical. For those seeking capital appreciation, the Best Ideas Newsletter portfolio may be of interest. For those seeking dividend growth, the Dividend Growth Newsletter portfolio includes our favorite ideas, while for those seeking high yield, the High Yield Dividend Newsletter may be your cup of tea. Dividend growth focuses on dividend growth potential; high yield focuses on current high yield, and so on and so forth.

The Exclusive publication is one of my favorite publications, where we highlight an income idea, a capital appreciation idea and a short idea consideration each month. You can read more about the Exclusive publication here. As of the date of the release of the December edition of the Exclusive publication, success rates for Capital Appreciation Ideas were 90.1%, while success rates for Short Idea Considerations were 88.1%. If you haven’t yet tried out the Exclusive, please do so.

Okay – so what about dividends? Unfortunately, I think we’re in for another difficult year for dividend growth investing. The SPDR S&P Dividend ETF (SDY) is only up 6% year-to-date, trailing both the equal-weight and market-cap weighted S&P 500 indices by sizable margins. With the 10-year Treasury yield at 4.6% and certificate-of-deposit rates still elevated, dividend-only-focused investors will likely continue to trail the broader markets. Remember: dividends are capital appreciation that otherwise would have been achieved, so don’t let the dividend tail wag the total return dog.

What about Bitcoin? I really don’t know. It’s definitely a greater fool asset like gold, but I have totally underestimated the number of fools there are these days. Haha. Just kidding, but seriously, with the regulatory environment easing with respect to crypto and with President-elect Donald Trump supporting crypto assets, who really knows how high Bitcoin can get or just how volatile the asset may become as institutional money ebbs and flows.

So what about small cap value? Well, year-to-date, the iShares Russell 2000 Value ETF (IWN) is up a meager 6%, and it is up just 28% over the past 5 years, trailing large cap growth considerably. With a near 30% weighting in financials and 10% weighting in real estate in the IWN, for me, it’s a no-brainer to avoid. The only way I believe the gap between large cap growth and small cap value narrows is if large cap growth falls on difficult times, which can never be ruled out. But that said, there’s no reason to believe in the IWN, no matter what the statisticians say about quantitative value. I tackle the issue of the pitfalls of falling in love with historical data in Value Trap, too.

All things considered, 2024 was an absolutely amazing year for our core research exposure (i.e. large cap growth). Do I think the SCHG will repeat its dazzling performance in 2025? Probably not to the same extent, but it’s hard to bet against some of the strongest net-cash-rich, free-cash-flow generating powerhouses on the market today. Give me Apple (AAPL), Nvidia (NVDA), Microsoft (MSFT), Amazon (AMZN), Alphabet (GOOG) any day of the week, especially over any financials-heavy index. Enjoy the rest of 2024 folks!

Leave a comment >>

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The High Yield Dividend Newsletter, Best Ideas Newsletter, Dividend Growth Newsletter, Valuentum Exclusive publication, ESG Newsletter, and any reports, data and content found on this website are for information purposes only and should not be considered a solicitation to buy or sell any security. Valuentum is not responsible for any errors or omissions or for results obtained from the use of its newsletters, reports, commentary, data or publications and accepts no liability for how readers may choose to utilize the content. Valuentum is not a money manager, is not a registered investment advisor, and does not offer brokerage or investment banking services. The sources of the data used on this website and reports are believed by Valuentum to be reliable, but the data’s accuracy, completeness or interpretation cannot be guaranteed. Valuentum, its employees, and independent contractors may have long, short or derivative positions in the securities mentioned on this website. The High Yield Dividend Newsletter portfolio, ESG Newsletter portfolio, Best Ideas Newsletter portfolio and Dividend Growth Newsletter portfolio are not real money portfolios. Performance, including that in the Valuentum Exclusive publication and additional options commentary feature, is hypothetical and does not represent actual trading. Actual results may differ from simulated information, results, or performance being presented. For more information about Valuentum and the products and services it offers, please contact us at [email protected].

#$schg #$iwn

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 months ago

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an impolite use of magic

I was rereading Malleus’s Dorm Uniform vignettes to gather information for another post! Something that stuck out to me upon the reread was how magic can be used in an insulting or disrespectful way. We often hear about how both NRC and Twisted Wonderland itself has many rules and regulations which govern magic and its uses—but it seems there is a social component too.

A quick summary of the aforementioned vignettes; they center around Malleus trying to make it to a dorm leaders meeting. After his peers fail to successfully remind him of their appointed time and day, Malleus decides it would be easier the other dorm leaders come to him rather than him going to them. He then casts a spell which transfers those he wishes to meet with (the headmaster and dorm leaders), bringing them directly to him. This is where it gets interesting, because it is Malleus using this spell on his peers that offends them.

Azul indicates that he had never been treated with such disrespect and that Malleus’s act is an insult. Vil and Leona express upset that Malleus seems to think of them as nothing more than objects, luggage, a pen, or a book. Malleus says he does not understand why everyone is mad because the same spell he used on them, they use all the time to summon their magical pens to them. Riddle clarifies: “PENS ARE OBJECTS AND WE ARE HUMAN BEINGS!!” Lastly, Idia likens the situation to being treated like a familiar that Malleus sees fit to summon at his beck and call, which is also just as irritating.

Judging by the other dorm leaders’ reactions, we can infer that most mages find it extremely impolite to have a spell which is typically used on objects cast on them/living beings. Riddle implies you must obtain consent before doing so, otherwise it violates decorum. (This aligns with the idea that magic is usually formally regulated; for example, medical mages must still get their patients’ consent to operate on them or to heal them.)

Reviewing the other lore we know of, this piece of magical manners (?) makes sense. It seems to be okay to cast object-oriented magic so long as permission is granted. For example, in Floyd’s Labwear vignettes, Adeuce are shown practicing color changing magic on an apple. Vil would use similar color changing magic to alter his and his father’s clothes when they were being hounded by the paparazzi. A similar situation would occur in Lilia’s Suitor Suit vignettes, in which Malleus uses his magic to create a suit on Lilia that perfectly matches his image. I’m sure there are many other examples you could think of; these are just the most obvious ones that come to my mind.

Where does that leave us? Well, with a bunch more questions!! Firstly, what else is considered rude use of magic? Secondly, are spells which violate control over one’s mind and body also considered transgressions of social norms??? They must be, right?? Then why was everyone so chill when discussing how Ruggie and Jamil used their UMs in the main story compared to Malleus casting his transference spell? Isn’t having someone else’s will overwrite your own equally as, if not more, degrading and dehumanizing??? (We do see the the other students upset about the magic being casted on them after the fact, but talking about the possibility of it isn’t done with horror; maybe because it was already established that doing these things is a no-no.) In which case, Ruggie and Jamil, who have UMs meant to be used on living beings anyway, is also “impolite” because their spells still violate other people’s autonomy. Why isn’t this banned by law or at least regulated?? Because it’s too hard to control through legislation alone? (That actually makes sense 💦)

What about when Deuce cast a floating spell on Ace to launch him at the chandelier in the prologue? Or the time NRC students made rude Halloween goers (Magicam Monsters) leave campus by floating them over the school gates?? Were those instances considered impolite too???? And is it more impolite to use magic against a non-mage (since they cannot defend themselves) than against a mage? They mention in Terror is Trending that there are laws against using (attack) magic on non-mages, but what about non-attacking spells and with consent like color changing magic???

What are the rules around casting magic on sentient objects like the Mirror of Darkness, is that considered rude as well since the object is “living”? Do ghosts count as “living” enough to be offended by having an object-oriented spell cast on them? Where do blessings and curses fall in this, since those can be cast without consent (Lilia on baby Silver in book 7) and can also be cast on objects (Vil with the gifted cake and pie in book 5).

I must.. know… 🤡

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the-goddess-of-mischief-writing · 1 year ago

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Phantom pain

Summary; Price said he would be back before Christmas, but you didn't think it would be like this.

Pairing: Cpt. John Price x reader (sunshine!universe)

Rating: Mature

CHAPTER NO/ONESHOT: Onehsot

Word; 9k

Warnings; angst, injury, copious amount of fluff

Author; @the-goddess-of-mischief-writing

A/N: Surprise update everyone! I've been feeling so festive this year, there's so much snow and everything's just so cosy, so this chapter comes as a little hurt to feel-good thing on the third of advent. If you don't celebrate Christmas or don't like the festive period, I simply hope that you have a great December nonetheless🥰

SUNSHINE UNIVERSE MASTERLIST

It had been a slow morning. Despite snow greeting you on the ground and in the air, you'd felt warm huddled in your jacket and the thought of cosying into one of the plush armchairs at your coffee shop. It had been serene; not many ventured outside in this weather. Yet, you'd smiled behind the lapel of your jacket when something other than cloudy skies and rain doused everything in a hue of grey.

You'd been in such a good mood that when you returned home with some pastries to go, saffron and caramel the main components in the golden danishes and tarts, you started a deep cleaning of your flat.

With the least Christmasy of Christmas songs playing from your speakers, you put up some festive lights, the warm glow softening every hard edge.

Although, while you're balancing on your stool, using some double-sided sticky tape to fasten a string of light behind your curtains, the music from your speakers is cut off by your phone ringing. You didn't think twice about heading to your phone, believing it was Marissa or one of your other friends. Yet, you stall when spotting the caller I.D. lighting up your screen.

Two weeks. John said his deployment would last two weeks. Of course, you would've been happy if he returned home earlier on any other occasion. But something made your stomach twist and your brows furrow when John now was calling less than a week and a half after he left.

"John?" You ask tentatively after answering the call and putting it on speaker.

"Sorry, lass, probably not the John ya wanted". Your heart fucking drops, your face falling in record time when it's a Scottish accent and not the easily recognisable British variant greeting you.

"J-Johnny?" Your voice breaks halfway through, unable not to. Even tears managed to well in the short seconds you realise what this call might be.

"Hey, easy, Price is alive and kickin'-"

"Oh god", you choke out the words, dropping to the couch behind you as you'd remained standing since you answered, for some reason. The tears that collected in the corner of your eyes trail down your cheeks upon your eyes shutting, more so from the sudden burst of relief than the fear that brought them.

"Fuck, you scared me, Johnny".

"Should've started with that", he excuses with a slight, strained chuckle before he clears his throat. "But... still callin' for a reason".

"Yeah, gathered that much", you return, wiping away your tears with your shirt sleeve.

"Captain got downed durin' the mission, nasty shot in the shoulder".

"What?" Your motion stills when you register what Johnny said, gaze falling to stare at the call-time ticking away tauntingly slow.

"Last time I saw him, he was in the infirmary and had just returned from a quick surgery".

"But is he alright?" You bring your phone closer to your face as if it somehow would make Johnny feel how you pressed for an answer.

"Huffin' and groanin' 'bout it but fine otherwise. He wanted me to call ya, knowin' the pain-meds he was forced to take wouldn't help him give good 'nough explanation of things".

"Okay, okay", you mumble. He's alive. Hurt but alive.

"He'll need to stay a while. But ya can come to see him if ya want".

"I can?"

"'Course, we'll be able to get ya a visitin' pass".

"Oh, thank you, Johnny", you breathe out.

"Nothin' to thank, lass. Can't stand the Captain's grousin' anymore". You chuckle half-heartedly at that. "I'll send you the details 'bout the visit and some information that's needed".

"Yes, yes, absolutely". You nodded along even if the Scot couldn't see the motion. "Send it over, and I'll fill out whatever's needed".

You don't know how much of a shit show things had turned into for them to return home early. Although, it must have been bad if not only John didn't go unharmed from it, but even Johnny seemed to have seen better days.

It was hard not to notice his roughened-up look when he met you by the army base's outer perimeter about two hours later. There were a few cuts and bruises littering his face, and even though the Scot didn't hesitate to bring you into a comforting hug as you jumped out of your car, you noted the slight wince he waved off as a 'bruised everything'.

Even if you'd been shaken after ending the call with Johnny, you attempted to calm down, telling yourself 'John's fine' before leaving your flat. Yet, those nerves flared right up when you entered the small visitors' centre beside the road. Thankfully, the very man who'd given you the news of John seemed to notice that the military surroundings were vastly unfamiliar and unnerving for someone not used to them, especially considering why you were here.

Johnny kept close the entire time, helping you with the needed papers for the visitor's pass by pointing to where your signature was required, even if he talked familiarly with the armed guards all the while.

You took deep breaths to steady yourself numerous times, feeling the Scot's attention fall on you each time he noted the same unease he previously only caught over the phone. You knew you weren't succeeding in hiding your nerves. Nevertheless, between being in a strongly off-limits zone for usual civilians and the fact you wouldn't be here if John wasn't in a hospital bed, you don't think Johnny or any of the other soldiers blamed you for it.

When everything was finally signed and read through, Johnny scribbled his signature on the dotted line beside yours on the last page.

With the I.D. around your neck, you exited the smaller building and jumped into your car again, only now the Scot hitched a ride back with you.

Your fingers rapped against the steering wheel once you were let through the gates and rolled forwards, teeth worrying your lower lip, eyes trained on the main compound further ahead.

"Lass", your eyes had swiftly adverted to Johnny, noticing his eyes shifting to your hands. You stopped with a tight lipped smile, your gaze having adverted forward again. "Price is roughened up but fine. He's been through much worse".

"I know", you sighed, having to hold yourself from going back to biting your lip. You'd seen John's scars, some on worryingly critical places on his abdomen. "But I haven't been there to see that...", you mumbled, eyes fixed on the parking lot ahead.

You and Soap didn't share much chatter as you parked, nor more than needed as he guided you through the building closest to the parking lot. However, he offered a reassuring squeeze of your shoulder when he saw you hesitate in the elevator upon reaching the medical wing.

A327. That was the room John apparently was in.

You looked at each door you passed, waiting for the right one.

324. 325. 326.

Your heart thudded hard in your chest as you finally reached 327.

With hands intertwining hands, fingers wringing each other, you merely stand rooted before the door. All of a sudden hesitant to step inside.

"He's gonna be fine, lass". Johnny's comment makes you look up at him. A gentler smile than usual meets you, causing you to release the breath you didn't know you held as you nod. "Let's get ya to meet him". The Scot gives you an encouraging smile as he opens the door, motioning for you to enter.

John's already facing your way when you step into the room that nearly shines white and beige. But your gaze only briefly meets his before it drops, flittering over his form.

He rests beneath multiple blankets that reach his stomach, his upper body clad in a soft white t-shirt that doesn't look like his own. Your jaw clenches when you spot his arm in a sling, stabilising it against his chest. As your eyes trail further upwards, a distressed sound bubbles up in your throat upon spotting the bandages peeking from beneath the left sleeve.

"John-", you don't manage to say anything more before you stutter to a stop, chest heaving on a sharp inhale.

"C'mere, love", his voice is hoarse, strained, barely more than a grating sound, but you move forward as on command.

You can't help how your mouth purses at how tired he looks, the hint of pain in his eyes so evident when you stop beside the bed.

"M'fine", John raises the arm of his healthy side, even so, he winces, eyes shutting tightly for a brief moment before they open again.

"Don't lie, I see that you're not", you murmur as you take hold of the hand that tried to reach your face, allowing his upper arm to drop and rest along the bed, instead meeting him halfway by bending down to kiss his knuckles.

John exhales deeply, eyelids fluttering close, the crease between his brows never smoothening. God, it hurts to see him like this.

You step closer, the side of the bed pressing into your thigh, planting a kiss at the very centre of the furrow. When you look down at John again, his features have softened, but his eyes still have a troubled look when that blue gaze meets yours.

"I'll leave ya two to it". You look over your shoulder, sending Johnny a look of gratitude.

"Thank you, Soap", John says. The Scot only nods in return, giving you a last look before he exits.

Once you're alone with John, you exhale almost painfully before gazing down at him.

"You don't know how scared I got when Johnny called", you admit. This time, John pulls your hand rather than face towards him, tipping his head forward to plant a firm kiss against your knuckles. "Thought-"

"Sit down, love". Upon catching your distress, John pats the side of his bed with a gentle voice. Although his attempt does little to ease your nerves, seeing how the slight move of his legs sideways to give you space only makes his features twist.

"Not a chance", you protest with a shake of your head, fearful of accidentally hurting him more. Instead, you glance around the room, finding a pair of chairs along the wall.

John doesn't hold you back as you release him and move towards them, but you guess it's more because he can't then don't want to.

You pull the chair along and put it as close to the hospital bed as possible, not hesitating to lean over the low metal railing at the side to hold John's hand again after sitting down, your other hand settling on his forearm, rubbing soothing motions.

You gaze up at the blue-eyed man, those pretty eyes of his duller than usual, exhaustion shining in its own faded might. His brown hair is one of the few darker accents in the room; the screen of the heartbeat monitor is the other source. Yet, it's matted, fallen to its own will against his forehead rather than styled into something casual by his fingers running through it and pushing it backwards.

Leaning forwards, your card your hand through John's hair, not nearly correcting it to how he usually does, but better nonetheless.

Your gaze flitters to meet his when you settle back in your seat, noting the smile adorning his lips.

"Happy to see you again, love". Not daring to test your voice, you kiss his knuckles in return. This time, you're positioned low enough that John's hand goes to cup your face when you lean away again, brushing his thumb over the apple of your cheek. "Even if it could've been under better circumstances".

You don't notice it until John's thumb paints a streak of wetness over your skin, but he redirects a stray tear rather than letting it follow its natural path.

"You're here. That's what matters". You squeeze John's wrist, leaning away to wipe your cheeks yourself, offering him a smile with a breathed chuckle.

"Was never not close to return". John wraps his hand over yours, letting them drop to the bed as he reflects your smile. "Shoddy shot whoever they were, used a handgun in close combat and still missed the brachial artery and brachial plexus", John releases one of those huff-chuckles of his. You shake your head, having no idea what difference it would make if whoever shot him hadn't missed those points, only that it probably would've been a lot worse.

"What- what went wrong?" Your gaze flickers to his injured side.

A heaved sigh escapes him before he speaks.

"Mission was bumpy from the start but went fine". You knew he let confidential details out, but you didn’t want to know anything apart from what happened to him. "Needed to wait out exfil in an abandoned buildin'. Remained remarkably silent until we got the call to move to the pick-up point. Got ambushed, absolute shitshow". He shakes his head with a grunt.

"How's the others?" You'd seen two of the four men, though Ghost and Kyle's absence suddenly irked you upon hearing what John told you.

"Bruised but none too badly". John ran his thumb over your hand. A low, partly amused, partly exasperated huff escaped him as he continued. "My turn to take the brunt for the team, it seemed".

Even if you could've wished for a better outcome for John, at least none of the others had gotten off worse.

You suck your lower lip between your teeth as you really try to take in his state, trying, only try again to find your words. Seeing John like this almost feels wrong.

You'd witnessed his soft side, but this wasn't soft. This is hurt. He wasn't sluggish as when you managed to keep him in bed rather than rise with the birds on the occasional weekend. This was exhaustion, one he tried to hide, but the lines on his face exposed nonetheless.

Barely anything could've pulled your attention from John as you tried to find your words, any consolidation that wouldn't sound like pity. And yet, when a knock sounded from the door, soon after swinging open, both your and John's eyes are pulled to the entrance.

When you spit the woman striding into the room, your brows jump up.

"Kate? Didn't think you would be here". Upon noticing you sitting by John's side, the American woman stalled, the computer beneath her arm pulled in front of her.

"I was involved in the mission the boys went on". She juts her chin towards the man at your side. "Mind if I speak to him?" Her tone wasn't stern, nothing hinting at malice or desire to break you and John up. Still, it didn't really sound like she asked.

You looked from Kate to John, not really stunned compared to feeling how a bubble unexpectedly broke. "Oh, yes, of course, I'll wait outside".

Considering how neither stopped you as you stood, John only squeezing your hand before letting go, you took it as an affirmation this wasn't a conversation you had any clearance to be present for and that one way or another would've happened either way.

Even so, Kate offers you a kind smile as you pass her on the way out. Yet, you note the blonde woman's features looked tighter than on the night of the party, without a doubt due to the predicament making John end up in a hospital bed.

When the door falls shut behind you, you lean against the wall just to the left of the entrance. It's silent to a degree you would guess the room John's in is semi, if not entirely, sound-proofed. Considering it isn't an emergency wing, you wouldn't disregard the possibility.

You sigh, eyes falling close. What a fucking day.

You don't know how long you stand like that, but you're only dragged out from whatever trance you entered once you catch the elevator stopping on your floor and the steps coming closer soon after. Considering you'd anticipated a nurse or the like, your brows rise when the pristinely white surroundings suddenly stand in stark contrast to the person dressed in dark army clothing.

"Heard from Soap you would be around". You smile as you push off the wall, meeting Kyle as he closes the distance between you. "How are you holding up?" The question brushes past your shoulder as he brings you in for a hug before keeping you within arm's distance, studying what must be your tired features.

"As good as can be". You smile in return. The young Brit rubs your upper arms reassuringly as he nods, seeming content with your answer as his arms drop to his sides. "You here to visit John?"

"I was, got some gaps in my schedule", Kyle confirms before cocking his head. "But I guess I'll have to wait, considering you're not there with him".

”Kate is paying him a visit”. He looks at the door with a furrowed brow before his attention tracks back to you and it smoothens. ”If you wanna greet him, maybe you have enough authority to”. Kyle only shakes his head.

”If Laswell wanted to talk to him first, there’s a reason. The rest of us will know in due time. Hopefully, he ain't such a grouse by then”. He shrugs, and you can't stop your laugh. This time, it's not half-hearted nor forced.

"All of you laying it on thick about how grumpy he is".

"He isn't such a charmer when things don't go his way and he isn't surrounded by pretty faces". You swat Kyle on the arm as he sends you a look. "Only telling you the truth, not all of us get special treatment".

"Yeah, yeah, alright", he nudges your shoulder with his knuckles before stepping backwards.

"Send the Cap'n my regards, have to be on my way".

"Will do. Have a good day, Kyle". He gives you a nod of goodbye in return as he turns on his heel, heading back to the elevator he came from a few minutes ago. You offer him a last wave before the door closes.

Alone again, you look at the clock on the wall. But, considering you have no recollection of when you exited the room, you can't tell how much time has passed since Kate arrived, only guessing it must be at least a dozen.

You scan the corridor, finding sporadic rows of chairs along the wall, similar to the ones in John's room. Not knowing how long John and Kate's unofficial meeting would continue, you move to one of the seats across from where you'd stood, fishing up your phone to make time pass faster as you sit down.

Taking note this time, you know another ten minutes have passed before the door opposite you opens and pulls your eyes from your screen.

You slip your phone into your pocket as you push up from the seat and head towards Kate, Even though she’s keeping the door open with one hand on the handle, you barely catch the end of John's sentence before it ends.

Just as you reach her side, Kate's attention trails from John to you, giving you space to enter by stepping out of the room. Flashing her a brief smile, you move forward but suddenly gets halted when her hand slips around your upper arm.

"It's good to see the Captain's got someone with him", her voice is lowered, only for you to catch.

Your lips tug upwards in a genuine smile. Without really knowing how to answer that, you offer Kate a nod and a small 'thank you' in return.

The smile she reciprocates with is much less strained this time around. "Take care of him now".

"I will". And with that, she nods goodbye, heading down the hallway while you re-enter the room.

"Spoke with Kyle". You begin while closing the door behind you. "He says hello". You forward his message to avoid forgetting.

When your eyes fall upon John, whom you barely catch an answer from, at least not more than a hum, you notice how he's sunken deeper into the bed.

"You tired?" You retake your place in the armchair as he hums again. As John scoots closer to your side and stretches his hand towards you, you settle your elbow on the bed and intertwine your hands again.

"Laswell was worried, wanted to check in and inform me some things that needed finishin' could wait". The pauses between his words were prolonged, and the pronunciation drawled as he briefed you on his conversation with Kate. "Should finish them, though", he grunted, trying to sit up straight against the pillows, but you settled a hand on his stomach.

"You need to rest, John. If Kate said things could wait, trust her". He stilled, looking back at you with slow, almost drowsy blinks.

"Fine", he agreed, settling into the bed again.

As he sighed, eyes fluttering close, you felt something bleed from your body, making your upper body relax forwards, head settling on the verge between John’s hip and his lower stomach. Feeling the weight, his eyes flutter open, head tilting forward as he gazes at you.

"Mm, talk to me, love, what you've been up to".

"Not much, really. I worked and met up with some friends. Oh, Marissa and I went on a little investment spree for Christmas".

"Investment?" John humours in a low voice, the twitch in his mouth unable to pull his lips into a complete smile compared to only tilting the edges upwards.

"If they're going to be reused yearly, that's an investment". He chuckles deeply, and you release a chuckle of your own.

You continue talking about what you've done in the week and a half you've been apart. Some Christmas baking, putting up decorations as of today, noting how most things out of the ordinary related to the holiday season.

Gradually, you notice how John's eyes fall close. Even so, he's still invested in the conversation with few-worded responses. But even those soon become nods and hums when his hand relaxes in yours. As you move to gently trail your fingers up and down his forearm, all while continuing to talk, the soothing motions make him heave a sigh.

Soon enough, the only sounds he lets out are the breaths escaping his parted lips, his softened breathing followed by the rhythmic movement of his chest.

You trail off in your sentence with a small smile, watching John's sleeping features. No furrow pulls his brows together, no involuntary twinge in his features letting on his pain. He looks at ease, and it finally settles your nerves as well.

In stark contrast to how you notice John's consciousness slipping, you don't detect yours slowly doing the same.

Your movements up and down his skin slowly grow shorter, from trailing between his wrist to the crook in his arm to only rubbing the spot your hand eventually stills on. The tension in your neck releases from the claws of whatever emotions had built throughout the tumultuous day, your head feeling heavier as it rests against his stomach. There's a fine line between when your blinking turns from slow to prolonged, even slimmer to when you can pinpoint your last conscious thought.

You're not the first to wake up. John's the one who stirs when a knock sounds from the door.

If not for the pain in his shoulder, despite being suppressed, he wouldn't blink his eyes so blearily and feel his mind sluggishly awake compared to what's expected of someone like him. Even so, his senses are sharper than yours as he notes your form slumped over the bed and your head resting on him, serene features remaining much like your steady breaths bleeding through the blankets.

His eyes trails to the door, releasing a low sound that must have sounded like a grunt to whoever was on the other side, but he couldn't care. The door swings open, Soap stepping through it much like he'd done a few hours earlier, but then with you by his side.

Now, the Sctosman closes the door behind him gently upon noting your sleeping form before his attention settles on John.

As Soap steps further into the room, John's eyes flit down to your sleeping form before rising again. With a swift look at the clock, he knows what the Sergeant is probably here for. He softly settles his hand upon your head.

You don’t remember falling asleep, only that John did, so when you’re roused from a dreamless nap by a hand cradling your scalp, you feel groggy when sitting up straight all too suddenly.

You blink repeatedly as your vision focuses again, finding John looking at you, his hand sliding down to the back of your head and down your arm.

"Sleep well?"

"Mhm". You roll your head, twitching at the twinge in your neck from your not-so-ergonomic sleeping position.

"Not the comfiest spot for ya". The Scottish accent catches you off-guard, as last you checked, only you and John were in the room.

You turn around, spotting the very Scot who'd spoken. "Oh, hi, Johnny".

"Hey, lass", he chuckles in return. "Just came ’bout to inform ya there’s a room waitin' if ya want to stay the night".

Your brows lift, eyes shifting to John, who's already watching you. "You don’t need to. I’ll be holed up here either way".

"It will just be less travel tomorrow", you shrug, turning back to Soap as you confirm you'll stay.

"Come on then, lass, visitin' hours are over soon". He opened the door slightly as he spoke, showing you he would guide you to your room for the night. You nodded, shifting out of your seat to stand, not without looking down at John.

"Go, get some proper sleep", he nudges your hip. You give him a brief smile before bending down, pressing your lips against his. They're chapped, but their plush warmth is soft. As you part from him, you mumble a 'goodnight' against him, an equally low 'goodnight, love' murmured against your lips, warming you further before you pull away.

You place the chair back where it's meant before fetching your things from beside the bed and offer John a last parting smile and a 'see you tomorrow'.

Just before you pass through the door, you look back at John, offering him a small wave, one he answers with a warm smile.

"You really turn the Captain into a love-sick man", Johnny's comment comes seconds after the door closes. You turn to him, seeing the amused look he sends you.

"Oh, shut up". You swat Johnny's arm, making him bark out a chuckle.

"Ain't nothin' bad, lass", he mused, nudging you back with his elbow.

The Scotsman lead you to another part of the compound, a freestanding building just across the one you exited, at the other side of the parking lot.

It had begun snowing. Fat constellations of powdery white fall through the air as you trudge through what's already covering the ground. You flick up the lapel of your coat, burrowing your nose in the fabric as you protect your eyes from the snowflakes desiring to stick to your lashes.

When you entere the building you'd been heading toward, the warmth inside was a welcoming change, and you shrug away the snow that had yet to melt into the dark fabric enveloping you.

This time around, there was no need to sign papers as upon your arrival, Johnny simply led you straight to the room appointed for you, handing you the key when stopping outside the door. As you entered, you were surprised, not knowing what you'd anticipated, but certainly not a space similar to a hotel room.

A low whistle pulls your eyes to Johnny. "Aye, not bad", his eyes rove over the room before settling on you.

"Much better than I thought", you agree, stepping inside, shrugging the bag off your shoulder, and simply putting it on the floor.

"Didn't think we would put ya in the barracks, did ya?"

"Never experienced military hospitality before, but didn't expect much", you shrug, smiling in return as you turn to face him.

He shakes his head. "That's the thanks", he quips, yet his grin deceives him. "I'll see ya in the mornin', lass".

"Johnny!" He halts in the step he'd begun to take, watching you with raised brows. "Just, thank you for... everything today". His fingers rap against the door handle as he shifts the weight on his feet.

"Knew it probably would be tough for ya and that Price probably hadn’t even thought ‘bout having ya visit here yet. S’jus' wanted to make it as smooth as possible for the both of ya. Know he would've done the same for the rest of us", he shrugs with a gentle smile. Johnny's consideration warming your heart.

"Thank you, really".

The side of his mouth bows upwards. "Ya are welcome". And with that, he closes the door.

***

When you wake up in an unfamiliar room, remembering where you are takes a few seconds. Then it comes rushing back as you see the visiting pass on the bedside table. Johnny’s phone call. John’s injury. The military base.

You sit up with a jawn, peeking out the room's sole window.

It’s utterly white outside, with no cloud in the sky as the sun just about peeks over the horizon, suggesting today will be considerably colder than yesterday.

Slipping from bed, you’re quick to dress yourself. The t-shirt you slept in gets stuffed into your handbag as you only shrug on the hoodie from yesterday, slipping into your pants not soon after.

You move to the bathroom, lamenting the lack of anything to freshen up. Even so, you splash your face with water, trying to tame your hair before sighing heavily, simply fetching the hair-tie you’d remembered to take off your wrist before bed.

Moving around the room, you remember the package of gum you’d thrown into your bag a few days ago, hoping you hadn’t chewed through the whole package when it would ease your mind about morning breath.

You rummage through your bag, cursing what yesterday didn't feel like a lot of stuff, but now does as you search for what you need.

A swift two-rap knock echoes from the door just as a triumphant sound escapes you when you spot the silvery package. Popping a gum into your mouth, you move towards the entrance, not surprised to find Johnny on the other side as you swing it open.

”Good morning”.

Johnny cocks his head as you smile at him before he splits into his own grin. ”Ya seem cheery this mornin’.”

”Seeing that John’s doing good helped me sleep better”, you shrug, catching a hum from him as you turn around to collect your stuff around the room. ”And then the bed was surprisingly good”.

”These ones are heaven in comparison to those in the barracks”.

”Yeah?” You turn towards the Scot standing with his hands behind his back, waiting at the doorstep.

“Aye, happy to not be rookie anymore”.

”Understandable”, you chuckle as you and Johnny step out into the hallway before tracking the same path you’d done yesterday. You could’ve done it yourself but had an inkling that you couldn’t move freely on the base.

”So you’re my guide while I’m here?” Blue eyes flicker down to you as he lets you pass out the door to the courtyard first.

It’s indeed colder today than yesterday, the chill biting your cheeks.

”Aye. Concernin’ Price was bed-bound; I needed to sign those papers in his stead”.

”And you don’t have better things to do?”

”L.T. gave me five minutes to spare”.

”From what?” The snow crunches beneath your shoes.

”Whatever drill he set up to run us into the ground”. You let out a surprised laugh at that, making the Scot grin. ”Yaself then, lass, goin’ to keep an eye out on the Captain for us when he leaves?”

Your eyes widen, switching to look at Johnny once evading an ice-spot as you cross the parking lot. ”He’s cleared to go home?”

”Haven't got any confirmation on it. But he's got no vital injury and has stayed close to two days, so it’s probable he’ll get to go home”, he shrugs.

The warmth rushes against your face as you enter the main building, much like yesterday, taking a right towards the medical wing.

”Feel like I’ll need to. Otherwise, he’ll stress the injury”.

”Wouldn’t be the first time any of us did that”. Johnny rubbed his neck as you raised your brows at him. He positioned himself opposite you as you stepped into the elevator, giving you a sheepish shrug. ”Comes with the job sometimes despite medical leaves”, the Scot excused the habit, only making you roll your eyes with a disbelieving huff.

”Then I’ll definitely have to ensure he takes it easy”. The doors close, and the elevator smoothly rises.

”Price won’t be able to say no to ya, never has since he met ya”. When your head dips into a shake this time, a smile adorns your lips that you try to hide. Even so, the Scot slung his arm around your shoulders with a laugh as you exited the elevator upon its chime and the doors opening.

The walk to John’s room seems much shorter than yesterday, without a doubt, because you know of his stable state. So when Johnny drops his arms from your shoulders, it’s not with bathed breath you open the door.

Unlike yesterday, your eyes don’t lock with John’s the second you enter the room designated to him. His gaze remains cast downwards on the tablet in his lap, even if his head tilts your way to show he noted someone had entered. Not until the Scot behind you offers a ’Mornin’ Captain’ does the man in the bed look up.

”What was that about makin’ him take it easy?” Johnny chuckles lowly, making you send him a look before he departs with a mock salute. You only shake your head at the man before entering the room.

”Aren’t you meant to take it easy?” You watch John with a raised brow, catching how the door slides close behind you while you slip out of your coat.

”I am”.

”Let me rephrase”, you chide him with a smile. ”Shouldn’t you relax, no work?” You move to the side of his bed with one of the chairs dragged along behind you.

”I-

”Don’t say that you are John. I know that look on your face”, you remark with a finger towards the easing purse of his lips and the furrow between his brows that’s not brought on entirely by pain like yesterday.

He sighs heavily, a locking sound coming from the tablet as he drops it screen-down in his lap. ”You’re right”.

”I know I am”. John releases a huff of laughter through his nose at your comment, softening your smile. ”Did you sleep well?”

He hums. ”Woke a few times ’cause of this-”. He jerked his head to his shoulder. ”Bed probably goin’ to set off my back”, he scoffed in annoyance at having to deal with the twinge in the lower part of his spine that you’d learnt most often came and went more frequently after he returned from a deployment or a bad mattress.

You hum, leaning forward to card your fingers through his hair that had fallen across his forehead after his previous jerky movement. While you do, you catch John returning the question, but your answer is an undeveloped ’good’, all your attention upon the locks your fingers card through.

His hair feels matted, and when your eyes briefly flicker over his face, you note his beard is untamed, not grizzly, but it’s lost the shine it usually always has.

”When was the last time you showered?”

”That's your way of tellin’ me I smell?” Your nose scrunches, hand falling to rest on the metal railing as your gaze locks with John’s amused one.

”No, at least that wasn’t what I was getting at”.

A chuckle precedes the more serious answer you get. ”About a week ago at the last safe-house, haven’t been able to have one after returnin’. Can’t wet the bandages”. You purse your lips, gaze momentarily switching to his shoulder before trailing back.

”How long before you can take them off?”

”The Doc visited before you came around and said I’m clear to leave, but the bandages needed to stay on until tomorrow”.

You nod. ”Johnny betted you would be able to go home today”.

”We know how these thing goes. Instructions about wound care, then sent off on med-leave before even attempting to come back and get shot at again”.

”Jesus, John”, you let out a chuckle of disbelief, shaking your head. When you raise it again, there’s a slight tug in the corner of his mouth and a knowing, truthful, look in his eyes. "Better we get you home and start the arduous wait, then." You offered him a smile and a raise of your brows, silently wondering if he was ready to pack up.

"Can't wait".

It wasn't a hassle to get John out of bed. He groaned and gruffed to himself as he pushed himself upright with your hand steadying him on his back, but that was about it. As he rose from the bed, you helped him into his boots and gently slung the jacket draped over his duffel-bag on the other side of his bed.

You'd sent him a look when he'd noted you of the bag's presence, remembering it wasn't there yesterday, to which he only explained Kyle got around and dropped off his things just after the Doctor had visited.

Although standard issued and didn't seem too heavy once you made the proposition to carry it instead of him, you cursed in disbelief when slinging it over your shoulder, not anticipating its weight. It had given John a good laugh before offering to take it regardless. However, you remained stubborn, motioning for him to take the lead out of the room with a 'you don't know how heavy our purses can be sometimes'.

But you don't enjoy a second of it as you trudge through the building; you more than John slowing the tempo. He catches you grumbling under your breath numerous times about what he's got in there, falling back to walk beside you once you reach the parking lot, mentioning he doesn’t desire looking back and find you toppled over in a heap of snow. He'd gotten another glare upon that comment.

You'd thought the drive home to John's would've been less arduous, but you'd found yourself unable to relax just as much, but for entirely different reasons.

With each turn of the car, you noticed how John braced his feet against the floor so as not to move in his seat, his free hand slipping beneath the seat belt to keep it from digging into his injury at times.

The way he acted made you all the more cautious in your driving, even picking routes that had more straight for his sake. You knew John noticed when you didn't take the usual right about halfway through the drive by the glance in your direction.

By the time you pulled into his driveway, the sky had darkened, and snow had started falling, making your and John's retreat into the house from the car hasty. Nonetheless, he managed to escape the weather that was worsening by the second much quicker compared to you as you fetched his bag from the booth.

You don't take more than a few steps into the foyer before you slip John's bag to the floor. When the pressure of the straps disappears, you sigh in relief.

John's chuckle makes you send him a glare. However, it melts away when your gaze finds the absolute disarray of his hair, now a combination of dirty and wet from the snow.

"Come one, I'll help you freshen up". You say, closing the door behind you, shielding you from the chilling cold.

"No need, love". You send him a look over your shoulder as you take off your coat, finding John stepping out of his barely laced boots.

"Why? You always have a shower when you get home?"

"If you have forgotten, can't get this wet for a day more". John nods to his shoulder as he faces you. "Can just wait 'till tomorrow".

Your brows furrow, and your hand falls to your hip while hanging up your coat. "John, I know how religious you are about your routine once you come home. There is no need to skip it just because you can't do it yourself when I simply can help".

You see his resolve falter somewhat as he regards you. "You don't mind?"

"Not at all", you shake your head. "Wouldn't mind a hot shower to warm up in this cold house of yours". A smile tugs in the corner of your lip when you end the sentence with an exaggerated wink.

It makes John chuckle as he shakes his head before those blue eyes rise to follow you when you approach. "Don't think I could supply that need now".

"Out of us two, I'm the one who can go a bit without being dicked-down". You kiss John's cheek as you slide the jacket from his shoulder, catching the harsh sigh as you wander to hang up his piece of clothing beside yours.

"That a challenge?" He hums as his un-injured arm sneaks around your waist as you finish your task, gently turning you around to pull you towards him. "Besides, I got other ways to satisfy you".

"Oh, I know". You give John a softer look as your hand slides down his forearm before gripping his hand, moving it to hang beside your bodies. "But let's listen to the doctor for now and let you heal up first". You offer him a smile as you back away and head into the house, John letting himself be led by you as you steer towards the stairs.

Not until you've reached his bedroom do you let go of his hand, ushering him to the bathroom as you move to his dresser. You swiftly dig through it for a new pair of pants, opting not to bring a shirt, believing neither of you could bother the hassle of attempting to put it on.

"Strip", you wave your finger towards John as you step over the threshold to join him in the en suite.

"Thought Doc's orders applied". You catch the smugness in his voice, sending him a humoured look, one he answers with a wink as he moves to sit down on the lid of the toilet. While John rid himself of the pants he'd gotten from the hospital, you place his own pair on the sink.

While he kicks them aside, your attention falls on the white shirt still covering his upper body. A furrow enters your brows, lips pursing. It would be challenge to take it off even if you helped him, being an uncomfortable and possibly painful process no doubt.

"Just cut it off". Your eyes meet John's, checking if you heard him right. With his head falling sideways in a nod, you move to the sink drawer to fetch the scissors, silently agreeing it might just be the easiest thing to do.

Mindful of the sling and bandages, you rid John of the thin cotton shirt, leaving him in only his boxers briefs.

While you turn around to throw the strips of his shirt into the bin, John stands, moving around you toward the shower. By cocking your hip, you swiftly close the drawer after putting back the scissors.

As you turn to say something to John, you catch him stabilising himself on the edge of the sink, knees just about to bend. Realising what he is about to do, all your previous thoughts are promptly cut short.

”You’re not kneeling on the floor." John stalls in his movement, looking at you. If he says anything in return, you don't catch it as you're already on your way out of his room.

The spare bathroom, which was under renovation the first time you visited, has now been finished. But you remember the stool John had used was yet to be taken to the spare room downstairs. Although you'd reminded him about it every time you'd been over, now you were thankful as you could fetch it as something John could sit on rather than the floor.

With a slight shuffling step, you bring the stool along with you and to where John waits, leaning against the sink, his eyes finding you the second you're visible through the open door of his en suite.

"Sit”, you motion to the stool you brought once John had moved to the side and let you set it down inside the shower's glass doors. A slight tug that doesn't evolve into a smile is present at the edge of his mouth as he follows your command.

When John makes himself comfortable on the stool, you gently nudge the back of his head with your fingers, urging him to bow forward to make it easier for you. Even sitting down, he reaches your stomach.

Pushing up the sleeves of your hoodie, you turn on the tap, testing the water steadily flowing from the showerhead on your hand. When finally finding the perfect temperature, you keep the stream gentle so as not to splash the bandages covering his left arm but rather trickle forward and down to the floor.

Small groans of appreciation escape John as you wash his hair, fingers running over his scalp to wet every single strand before setting down the showerhead and massaging some shampoo over his head. Earthy and clean scents fill the warm air as it steams every reflective surface inside the bathroom.

You do a double cleanse, not because you think John needs it, but because he seems to enjoy the gentle pressure off your fingers as they run up and down his scalp.

After washing away the last sudds, you take a towel from the rack and cover his head. Your laughter fills the air as you hear the huff of amusement from beneath the fabric draped over him as you attempt to dry his hair as much as possible by ruffling the fabric.

Ultimately, you slide the towel from his head, letting it hang around his neck to catch any stray droplets from reaching his shoulder. John turns towards you upon having his vision uncovered again, and you instinctively step closer when he does, inspecting his face.

”I don’t trust myself trimming your beard”, you card your fingers through the brown strands on his cheek. A low huff pulls your eyes to the blue ones steadily watching you.

”Can do that myself in a day or two. You’ve done plenty enough, love”. John’s about to stand, but your hand softly settles on his healthy shoulder.

”I only said I don’t want to go near the best part of you with scissors”.

”The best part, eh?” He pinches the back of your lower thigh, a squeak slipping out of you as you bat his hand away with a lower lip curled between your teeth.

”Don’t bite the hand that feeds you”, you chide with an evolving smile.

You catch John’s chuckle as you switch your attention to the counter, eyeing his products as neatly lined up as usual and the set of your own products beside them. Stepping away to the sink and out of his reach, you grab one of the face towels from the stack he’d bought for you to always have at his place, along with the other products needed.

When you turn back, you set the things on the sink-edge beside you.

”Said I can’t shape it up, but that doesn’t mean I can’t make the most out of what I can do”.

”You pamperin’ me?” Your eyes flit sideways, meeting a blue gaze watching you with a tilted head.

”I’m taking care of you, John”, you corrected him as you turned to wet your hands beneath the tap and squirted some cleanser into your hands.

John doesn't respond, only remains quiet when you start coating his face in the milky substance, merely staring up at you for a few seconds before his eyes flutter close when you cock a brow down at him.

You gently rub away the invisible grime on his face, staying clear of his beard as you lather his face. Humming gently, you wipe away the suds after a few dozen seconds and continue with the beard shampoo.

You’d seen the man, who now lets his chest deflate with a content sigh as you easily angle his head backwards with a few fingers beneath his chin, do his beard-routine a few times. It wasn’t difficult to remember, and you’re happy you didn’t need to ask John and bring him out of the relaxed state he’d entered as you used one of the brushes to rub the product into his beard.

Using the opposite edge of the towel, you also dry off his beard.

You wash off the white foam from the brush as you discard the towel before coating his skin in your moisturiser, only to continue by dropping some oil into your palms before you settle them over his lower face, smoothening them over the strands.

As you shift to the sink again, you reach for his comb, only to find John’s eyes had fluttered open when you turn back.

Those blues of his are soft as you gently comb his facial hair with slow movements. His hand settles on the outside of your thigh when you pick up the beard balm, warming it between your palms. The vanilla white lotion softens and warms between your hands before you work it through his beard.

Slowly, John's hand moves to the back of your leg while fingers lightly start tracing the line of his beard and skin, both much smoother than previously.

The moment was soft, gazing at one another in silence, before you cupped John's cheek and bent down. A gentle smell of something nutty from John's beard invades your nose as you press your lips against his.

Even if you end up trading multiple kisses, the pauses never let you drift further away than for your lips to rush against one another.

John felt the last bit of tension leave his body. Something awfully soft had infiltrated his heart as you fussed around him, your hand leaving gentler touches than even the Doc had done when he’d returned from the field with his shot-up shoulder. He’d tried to ward off your help and doting, but now he realised he needed this.

He’s been on 24/7 for over a week. He’s run on less food than at home. Countless times, his mouth had watered when thinking about the roast you’d shared before his deployment. He’s run on minimal sleep for several days in a row, barely more than half asleep when given a moment of tranquillity and nowhere near as relaxed as when having you in his arms. He’d looked over his shoulder for more than double the amount, only to be hit by a bullet in the end anyway, coming home broken.

John pulls away, cupping one of the hands that rests on his cheek, turning to kiss your palm. But, when he gazes at you again, your brows draw together.

”Don’t”.

"I didn’t say anythin'"

You only shake your head. "I know what you’re thinking, and no, you're not a burden".

"But I'm a broken man at the moment, love. Just see how much you've needed to do today", he scoffs, letting go of your hand, letting his fall onto his lap. You stop John from turning his head to the side, away from you, instead forcing him to watch you.

You look down at the man who meets your gaze with an almost sorrowful look. "And you think that bothers me?"

"Why wouldn’t it? It’s not your responsibility. Should just not have gone about gettin’ shot-".

"Jonathan Price". The use of his government name shuts his grumbling right up, his eyes even widening the slightest bit. "What bothers me isn’t that you got shot. I know the dangers of your work. What does bother me is seeing you in pain".

"I appreciate it, but there’s no need for you to do all this, to care for me". His voice is softer, but you still shake your head.

"Yes, there is because I love you". You barely notice the weight of what you say, those three chosen words leaving your lips in a too-natural fashion to be the first time. But rather than reluctance preceding and nerves following them, there's a sense of them being long overdue in the first place.

"I hate how much it hurts seeing your pain, so it’s not that I need to do anything for you. I very much care because I want to, John".

Compared to a few moments ago when John wanted to turn away from you, now he can't take his eyes off you. Whatever murky emotion which clouded his eyes has lifted, those blues clearer than ever as he stares right back at you, lips slightly parted.

"I’ve said it before, but you're too good for me".

"They say you get what you deserve". You offer John a smile, and something just crumbles then.

"God, you don’t know how much I love you, darlin’".

Your chest swells, heart suddenly pumping much warmer blood through your body. "So let me take care of you now when you need it".

"I- of course", he breathes, voice remarkably thin to support his gravelly cords as he shuts his eyes tightly. John gives you a single nod instead of attempting to continue his sentence, and you lean down to press a kiss against his forehead.

His arm loops around your waist the best it can from his slumped forward angle, pulling you close so his head rests against your upper stomach. Despite his hair being wet, you card your fingers through it, kissing the top of his head, his warm exhalation warming your skin despite the thick sweater.

"Goin’ to be one hell of a Christmas". The first half of the sentence is mumbled into you, the second half clearer as John looks up at you again.

You hum, feeling how one of the strands at the back of his neck drips water onto your fingers. "I only see more of a reason to have a lazy day".

"Where you do everythin’".

"Hush, now you’ve allowed me to do the work for once". You twirl the hair at the nape of his neck, looking back into those blues.

"Still don’t want you workin’ yourself to death". He gives you an honest rather than pointed look.

"I should say that to you", you only muse lightly in return, not needing to avert your eyes to his bandages as they shine like a beacon in the corner of your vision. "And I reckon it’s going to be fine either way".

"M’sure”, his reply is hummed into the sparse space between your faces before your lips press against his in a fleeting kiss. Before you lean back and straighten, however, his hand cups the back of your neck. "Thank you for all of this, love".

"You know it’s nothing". Although John doesn’t answer as you step backwards, you don’t catch any guilt, no trace of the previous gloom in his gaze. He believes your words, the crows-feet at the edges of his eyes and smile-lines around his mouth further proof.

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it-happened-one-fic · 3 months ago

Text

An Honor - Jamil

Author Notes: So this fic just kind of happened to be honest. I was bored one day and felt like writing, so I started writing. I suppose the idea behind this fic was that I've always felt like Jamil would be the sort of show off. As per usual, reader is gender-neutral. I hope you enjoy!

Type: Gender-neutral reader/ sfw/ fluff/ fliration/

Word Count: 1899

I blinked up at the young man who looked down at me from where he’d walked over to be my seatmate for the class. And slowly, a smirk appeared on his face that had the surprise slipping off of my face, only to be replaced with mild annoyance as he spoke, his voice filled with smugness, “What’s the matter, Prefect? You look like you just stumbled across an oasis in the desert.”

And people thought Jamil didn’t think highly of himself.

It was a fight not to roll my eyes as I glanced away from him. Pursing my lips slightly and looking toward the front of the class where Trein was watching his selected partners team up.

It was one of those classes where, in the interest of challenging the students, Trein had decided to mix up who we were working with. So instead of having Ace or Deuce with me, I was going to be sitting and working with none other than Jamil.

Which really shouldn’t have been that bad. He was a perfectly competent student. In fact, competent was putting it lightly. If I were being wholly honest, then Jamil was quite intelligent.

Or at least he was most of the time. Even the highly competent Jamil had his dumb moments, and I'd certainly been privy to some of them.

Nonetheless, in reality, I really should’ve been thrilled to have such a skilled seatmate for a class involving magic use where I couldn’t contribute much of anything in the way of assistance.

But that reality couldn’t be further from the truth, because when it came right down to it, me and Jamil were like oil and water. Never to be mixed, since it seemed like a conversation between the two of us could never occur with the exchanging of insults and barbed commentary.

I could acknowledge his skills, but at this point they seemed to become more of a consolation prize when it came to having to deal with his mouth.

Either oblivious to my thoughts or uncaring, he sat down next to me smoothly, and I sighed. Resigning myself to my fate as I glanced over his way, “So what spell are you going to be doing and what components are you going to need?”

We both knew I couldn’t contribute much to this activity when I couldn’t use magic. At best, Grim could try and help, and he would have too, since Trein wouldn’t allow otherwise, but I wasn’t about to let him pick the spell. Not when Grim’s last choice had landed both me and Deuce in the infirmary with some nasty burns.

Jamil’s eyebrows arched as Grim protested my words before being silenced by a single glance from me, “It’s my choice then?”

I looked back towards the tanned young man before I nodded. Lifting my shoulder in a half-shrug as I felt a slight smile slip onto my face, “Well, it seems only fair since you’ll have to do most of the work.”

A smug grin spread across his face, and I felt myself tense as I realized exactly what that expression meant before he spoke, “Well, well… This is an honor. I’ll endeavor to live up to it.”

And there it was. His sarcastic side that always seemed to slip out whenever I was alone with him.

I suppose he had no reason to hide it anymore after the events of Winter break, and perhaps I should’ve been flattered that he didn’t feel the need to wear his party mask around me, but I couldn’t help but be annoyed.

It was almost like it was his sole goal in life to harass me at this point, and he unfortunately got lots of openings since our teachers seemed to be perpetually pairing us up.

Either that, or Jamil had an uncanny ability to ensure we got paired together, and if so, these were even more pointed attacks than I’d realized.

Though I would have to admit I was impressed by his ability to get what he wanted if that were the case.

Either way, it was commonplace for Jamil to show off and sass me with thinly veiled, biting comments while I would do my best to bite my tongue and not give him what he wanted by snapping back only to inevitably fail.

I snorted though as Grim looked warily between the two of us and my voice came out filled with dry sarcasm, “I guess that means I can look forward to a really high grade for this class then?”

He outright smirked at me, and I felt myself snort as I shook my head slightly, “So what components are you and Grim going to need?”

Jamil let out a hum as he sat down next to me, leaning over so that his shoulder was pressed against mine as he scanned the sheet of accepted spells for this class.

I shifted, watching as he silently read before nodding, the motion causing his hair to slide freely over his shoulder. The golden beads that he used for decoration clinking together as his gaze slid toward mine in an oddly pleased manner, “Some fire.”

I felt my eyebrows lift as I held his gaze, already suspicious of whatever he was plotting as I echoed his words with blatant disbelief, “Some fire?”

His eyes glimmered at my words before whatever he was thinking was hurriedly concealed. An action that only made me more suspicious as he tilted his head, “You don't trust me?”

His tone was oddly flat and definitely controlled, wholly at odds with what I’d gotten used to from him over the past few months.

I faltered slightly at his sudden change in behavior as I stared back at him before I cleared my throat slightly and gestured to Grim, “Will magic fire work?”

Jamil blinked as if he were briefly surprised before his gaze shifted to where Grim stood, now puffed up with pride at the mere thought of getting to use his trump card in terms of magic. And I watched as Jamil nodded, a smile working its way onto his face as he looked back my way, “I should be able to use that…. Yes.”

I nodded, crossing my arms slightly, “Is there anything else you need?” It was phrased as a question, but I hardly expected for fire to be the only thing that Jamil needed. From what I understood, spells requiring components were fairly common.

But at odds with my expectations, Jamil only shook his head. Standing as he gestured for me to stay put, “No, you can just sit and watch.”

He paused, that accursed smirk appearing on his face once more as he leaned towards me, “Think you can manage that without causing any messes, Prefect?”

And there it was, a jab at the fact that something always seemed to go down when I was around. And I glowered back at Jamil before smiling with forced sweetness up at him, “Just as well as you can manage pulling off this spell without any issues, I’m sure.”

He snorted, oddly pleased with the fact that I'd bitten back in the way he always was before he straightened again and turned to look at Grim, “Then watch closely, Prefect.”

“I hope you can handle my magic, Jamil,” Grim was utterly smug as he braced himself, and I almost snorted at his commentary.

But at odds with the way Jamil always matched my sarcasm, his response was wholly unimpressed as he pulled out his wand. Eyeing Grim closely the entire time, “Not a problem.”

Grim scowled up at him but blew out a large puff of fire, causing me to swing my legs out of the way with a startled squeak, only for Jamil to catch every bit of it with a single wave of his wand. A smirk already spread across his face as I glanced his way.

And I wasn’t the only one looking. In fact, it seemed like the entire class was looking at us now. A fact that had me frowning.

Because Jamil didn’t like to be the center of attention. He wanted to be recognized for his talents, yes, but not gawked at.

Which I could respect. I couldn’t say I cared for being stared at like some sort of attraction either.

But this time he seemed wholly unbothered by the stares his magic garnered as he deftly wielded Grim’s magic. Seemingly condensing it into a brilliantly glowing ball of blue flame that almost seemed to glitter.

And, despite myself, I could feel my interest growing as I watched closely. Curious as to what Jamil was about to do. Because I had no doubts he would succeed. Like it or not, Jamil was skilled at what he did, and though he might be cocky, he was also good at picking things he could manage so long as he wasn’t competing with someone.

The longer I stared though, the longer the ball of flame remained just that. A condensed ball of blue fire that glimmered mockingly. Like it was playing at being something more than it truly was.

I felt myself frown before I glanced at Jamil's way in slight confusion, only to find him watching me with a smirk on his face, no doubt amused by my obvious fascination with his magic.

As if I wasn’t fascinated by everyone's magic.

I opened my mouth to ask him if everything was alright, only for him to shake his head slightly, “If you look away, you’ll miss the show.”

My eyes widened slightly at his warning before I hurriedly looked back in time to see the magic explode with a mere flourish of the wrist from him.

Blue flames sailed up towards the ceiling before imploding in flower-like patterns that reminded me of kaleidoscopes.

My breath caught slightly in my throat as I stared overhead at the magical fireworks, entirely missing Jamil pocketing his wand and sitting down next to me until the flames had all faded from existence. Leaving only a shower of sparkles that rained down around us as I looked his way in quiet surprise as he grinned at me with open smugness.

I could hear Trein from the front of the class, his voice filled with pleasure, “Very good job, Mr. Viper! Seldom have I seen such a brilliant pyrotechnics spell!”

Jamil nodded, quietly voicing his thanks for the professor’s praise before his gaze met mine once more and his smug smile returned as he leaned over, his voice lowering so only I could hear him, “And there is your ‘high grade,’ as promised.”

I blinked before frowning at him slightly, shaking my head as he only grew more smug, “Fine. I’ll admit it, it was impressive. But you already knew that, didn’t you?”

He outright grinned at me, leaning back smugly, “I did say I would endeavor to live up to the honor of getting to use the spell of my choice.”

I paused, tilting my head at him before I finally smiled, half amused even despite our typically acerbic relationship. After all, he’d won fair and square.

“Well, I’d say you lived up to it then,” His smile spread at my words, more genuine this time as he held my gaze. Both of us grinning at the other one and somehow, miraculously, not snarking at the other one.

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