#otherkin discourse

[draagonprincess]

Why must otherkin argue over terminology when we could be having the weirdest possible blunt rotation

[moved-to-piersgender]

It's all "be gay do crimes" "cringe culture is dead uwu" until y'all lay your eyes upon someone genuinely weird/transgressive like nonhuman-identifying people, or kinky people, or even neurodivergent people who can't mask to your satisfaction and suddenly y'all are chomping at the bit to become attack dogs for an oppressive social order/"normalcy"

[nyctohyloph0bia]

Honestly y'all need to chill with the "nonhumaness needs to be involuntary!"

The only reason you're saying that is due to wanting to present 'valid' enough for outsiders. It's not a choice so they won't bully you, like they do furries or other people.

And I hear you cry "but KFF!". KFF aren't nonhuman, they just relate. If someone comes over to me and says "I choose to be nonhuman today, I am nonhuman no matter what other ppl tell me. I genuinely identify as nonhuman." That isn't KFF, that's a nonhuman.

Truly, I'll just go "woah...that's so based". Because truly, what are our differences? We both genuinely identify as nonhuman....and yeah that's about it.

You might say, "they don't experience shifts!" There's nonhumans that don't experience shifts. And there's humans that experience shifts, we call it the "shifter's disease". Basically when a full human researches or is around nonhumans and begins feeling phantoms or feeling nonhuman, despite not being nonhuman. So it isn't exclusive to us.

"They don't have noemata!" There's nonhumans that don't have noemata.

"They don't suffer species dysphoria." Theres nonhumans that don't experience species dysphoria. Also cool transmed rethoric.

"They weren't born with it!" There's nonhumans that become nonhuman later on in life.

"They didn't wish their whole life to be a different species!" And? I can imagine there's some nonhumans that didn't even realize they wanted to be/were a different species.

"It's disrespectful to nonhumans that suffer due to their identity!" Another cool transmed rethoric. It's only disrespectful to you because you're up your own ass and believe that anyone who didn't suffer like you did, that didn't have it as hard as you isn't as valid as yourself. But what you don't realize is by having that belief you are excluding such a large portion of your community.

There's involuntary nonhumans who don't suffer from their identity at all and they're still part of our community.

The line between voluntary and involuntary can get blurry very quickly and hard to describe. But truly, you are no one to say who can use a label that rightfully describes their experiences.

Get real and truly think about why you're so upset at someone having a good faith identity.

[infinitedraconity]

This post just got a burst of notes, what happened?

An Otherkin's Guide to Interacting with the Media

Step 1: Don't.

[prodigal-bloodkin]

Disappointed but not surprised by the reactionary disgust at alterhumans discussing our sexuality. Alterhumanity doesn't end where the bedroom starts.

Nor are packers inherently sexual. It's just gear. Self expression is not abuse.

[psychology-department]

i'm starting to feel less and less safe in this site as a fictionkin, so i just wanted to call out (factkin dni please):

INTERACT WITH THIS POST IF YOU'RE FICTIONKIN

INTERACT IF YOU RESPECT ALL KINTYPES REGARDLESS OF MEDIA

[lizardywizard]

This! Radical acceptance and blind faith are not the same.

Radical acceptance, in my understanding, is about questioning your kneejeek impulse to pick someone apart just because you're personally uncomfortable. You don't have to like everyone in the community, and you're even allowed to think a microlabsl is silly or weird.

But you also have to question your own "ick" response and the part of you that tells you that your first emotional reaction to something is correct, and when you find something that makes you feel that way, go and do research as to whether it actually is this terrible thing you've been afraid of. That's the "radical" part: you have to be willing to change when you get new knowledge. That's hard.

And then, even if you decide you're personally uncomfortable with something, don't be a gatekeeper about it. That's the "acceptance" part. If you genuinely have evidence that someone's doing direct harm (e.g. animal abuse), don't be a lone keyboard warrior - gather the community about it. Actual animal abusers get kicked out pretty fast here.

Otherwise, unfollow/block/mute if you have to. It's up to you to decide where you draw the line of real harm, but if making people justify their cane use is on the same side to you as preventing actual physical harm, despite other disabled people saying that normalisation of aids in society would help them, you're not very radical or accepting, and you're not going to get far in anything labelled "punk". Because gatekeeping does harm to your community too.

Question things, be willing to accept you're wrong, don't be a dick. If you value your personal, inner kneejeek reaction-as-scepticism over "letting people do thing", you're still welcome in the otherkin community, but you're not a punk, yeah?

Signed, someone who uses a cane because I have shitty hips sometimes, and also finds it species euphoric.

I’m heavily pro-endo so that statement was meant literally (polytherian does not experience any form of plurality but calls themselves a system purely based on having multiple theriotypes).

Even if we were just talking about self expression. As a disabled person, does being radically accepting mean I have to accept nonhumans who are not disabled (who have said they are not disabled) using medical equipment to express their nonhumanity (i.e. someone using a cane solely for the purpose of showing they should not be bipedal). Because, it’s their right to express that way but it doesn’t sit right with me that I’m watching someone use medical equipment as an accessory. It’s not harmful but it’s also not something I can agree with.

I guess my point is. Where do you draw the line with radical acceptance? If we believe everyone about everything, if we accept every form of expression, at what point can we recognize what is harmful and not? If a couple people are hurt by it, is that harmful or just a personal opinion?

By no means is any of this meant as an attack. I’m really just trying to figure out where the radically accepting folks come from (as I once thought myself to be RA but found it brought on much toxicity and drama to spaces that weren’t that way before). As I said. I love Beastpunk for all its other qualities… just not the radically accepting (basically blind faith in my opinion) part…

Look, as someone who walks with a cane and wishes it was as well-loved and accepted an accessory as glasses currently are, so I'd get less shit about using one and accessibility for canes would be more baseline, I think you seriously need to reconsider why you can't agree with that. And why, even though you openly admit it isn't harmful, it's still being used as an example in this scenario.

Let's open the doors on this-- we're talking about a concept where we are trusting people to know themselves better than we know them, and where we are accepting the aspects about people that they cannot change, and where we are accepting people's non-harmful forms of self-expression. Where does any of that suddenly scoop your ability to think critically and deeply about information being presented to you out of your skull? I'm hunting through my essay and, you know, I simply just can't find the part where we yoink out your common sense or ability to question others.

Beastpunk is against plenty of harmful ideaologies and communities-- like pshifting, for instance, for historical reasons as outlined in the essay. You can be beastpunk and have opinions about what constitutes harm and what doesn't. But, as I said before, you're conflating radical acceptance as spoken of here with tucking tail and showing off your throat and belly, so to speak. You are confusing radical acceptance within this framework with an inability to confront others and to dig in deep to question why you are uncomfortable with something to decide if it really truly causes harm or if it's just internalized shit you need to unpack (re: the cane thing). And look, I cannot give you that skill. And being beastpunk requires that skill.

I cannot in good faith recommend beastpunk to you when you have so blatantly misunderstood what it represents, and seem to have a total inability to grasp one of the underlying, core principles of it.

Other folks are also welcome to chime in.

[literally-tomura]

I don't know where this idea that fictionkins can't have memories and that memories are a fictive only thing came from... I keep seeing it (especially on TikTok) and it's incredibly frustrating

Fictionkins definitely have memories. Calling us delusional is one ableist and two just rewashed anti fickin talk

[monsterkin-culture-is]

Why So Serious? There's No Wrong Way To Be Kin.

- OtherKin Ramble 💫

Prenote: I've been thinking about how to word this for like a month now and I'm still not sure so don't treat this as like a proper essay, more of a thought-dump. This is not being said in a critical tone. ALSO a couple of you might've seen the accidental half-baked version anyway this is it finished.

This might be a HotTake™️ (I doubt it) but people take kinsidering way too seriously.

The main type of kinsider post I've seen is "Is X possible?" Usually in the form of: "Can I be kin of X?" "Can X trigger a kinshift?" etc etc etc. To the first question: Yes. The answer is yes. There are so few rules to being kin, there is no reason you cannot be kin of whatever. Conceptkin exists - kintypes don't even have to be living things or anything physical! To the second question: Kin is not a science. There is no ruleset to how it works. If something triggers a kinshift for you, it's a valid kinshift trigger.

Kinsidering is NOT the same as self-diagnosis. You do not need years of research. You do not need to treat labels with the upmost sensitivity. You DEFINITELY DO NOT have to be right the first time. Experimenting with labels is, in my opinion, the best way to know if they fit. Placeholder labels are also not only valid but common. And even then, you don't have to label anything if you're not ready.

The kin community fundamentally works on respect. Mutual respect. As long as you come in here with an open mind & an open heart & a genuine good-faith mindset, you're okay, you're valid and you're probably going to have a good time!

Anyway that's all for now, I'm sure I'll make a follow up. Feel free to continue the conversation yourselves/send feedback in the notes!

I really want to state that any harsh tone in this is not intentional, nor directed to new kins. If it's targeting anyone, it's the people that make newbies feel like they have to walk on eggshells.

To the new kin: If someone is sending you hate over honest mistakes and genuine questions - they're not someone whose opinion matters. Honestly this goes for topics outside kin too. If you're respectful and not purposely ignorant, then there's really no reason for hatred.

[the-fallen-collective]

emails are not shown, everything is put in a way where you can provide reasoning (preferred but not required) and putting your tumblr user is optional

This is the one time where our dni does not apply because we would like responses from a lot of people

If you see this, it’d be greatly appreciated if you could take it and reblog it /nf

This is really just an experiment we���re doing ourselves to see other’s views and opinions (also out of boredom. Boredom creates curiosity)

(So sorry for the cross tagging but is it cross tagging if it applies?)

We do not agree with everything mentioned in the form. We actually disagree with a lot of it or have differing/complicated opinions from different alters

[the-masked-bandits-system]

i’m so curious:

edit: not trying to equate these things! just trying to see the overlap and how folks describe their experiences

us, we’re currently unsure 😅

also looking for ways to explain to people why we might have certain items like ears/tail without being like, “hi i’m deeply traumatized” if they don’t know about our cdd

maybe this is too niche a question for this tumblr but i am curious to hear anyone’s experiences :) i’m adding a ton of tags i hope that’s not bothersome /gen

[cavaliercanine]

ive been thinking about this for a while and y'know. there isn't actually a big difference between someone asking you not to refer to them as human and someone asking you to use gender neutral language for them. ive seen fellow queer people (mostly on twitter) whine and scream and shit their pants over being asked to not call someone human, as if that is somehow different from a transphobe throwing a fit about being asked to use singular they for someone? how often does that even come up? do you seriously refer to others often enough with the word "human" that being asked not to is a major inconvenience? I don't know how to finish this post but you get the idea it's hypocritical and annoying

[maeinthekinning]

Stop saying normal when you mean respectful. Many things it's normal to be disrespectful and outright bigoted.

Stop saying normalize (push to be viewed as common or to increase rates of to a normal level) when you mean destigmatize.

Trust me, it helps your point more.

[moved-to-darkplanets]

This is something that has worried me in the past so prehaps it may help someone else to hear too: You cannot accidentally be KFF. It's literally not possible. Kin-for-fun is a specific online subculture with their own terminology, behaviors, and expectations united by the fact they're ""kinning"" stuff because they just want to fuck around online and make jokes, and don't mean thier connection to or with their "kins" in any genuinely introspective way. If you are genuinely interested in the topic AT ALL you're not KFF even if you can't produce masterpiece essays about yourself. Even if you can't easily slot yourself into a label. Even if figuring yourself out takes a while. There's no time limit.

[hellhour]

meow

[gold-snek-hoe]

Hello and welcome to Opinions from an Internet Nobody. Today's essay:

"Ger therapy" is the new "You need Jesus": One Weirdo's Navigation through Cultural Shame

This is a supposedly well-meaning sentiment that is often weaponized against people who are behaving outside of perceived cultural norms. It's a favorite of homophobes who see queerness/transness as a mental illness, but I've been seeing it used to demonize kink (which historically is often linked to queerness), and more generally any "weird" behavior that makes people uncomfortable.

For example, otherkin, systems (especially those with fictives), and people who take fictional characters as partners. Y'know, "weirdos" who "can't separate reality from fiction." And, sure, sometimes there can be a problem with that distinction, but I know as well as you that most internet strangers saying "get therapy" don't actually give a shit about the mental health of those they target. It's code for "your behavior makes me uncomfortable, stop it."

Same sentiment as "you need Jesus."

This has actually taken me a long time to figure out. I've been in therapy for my entire adult life, working through various traumas, severe depression, anxiety, all that. Those were the biggest problems as they negatively impacted, and often endangered, my life. It was only after my hospitalization in 2020, where I was finally put on much needed medication, that I could start to grow into myself.

I changed my name. I top surgery. I came out as polyamorous. I finally got my official autism diagnosis. Now I'm fuckin' married! But... there are still things I'm working through in therapy. Mainly, shame over my "weirder" behaviors. My current therapist has been a huge blessing in helping me accept the things I was too ashamed to admit.

Now, I feel comfortable enough to share.

I'm otherkin. Always have been. My connection to my humanity is tenuous, and I'm sure that's connected to my autism. When mad, I feel phantom horns sprouting from my forehead. I have a tail that swishes back and forth at the base of my spine. In my soul, I am monstrous, and years of therapy has not erased that.

I feel like I'm only half in the physical world most of the time. This doesn't hinder my real-world success (I graduated college Summa Cum Laude, have an IMDB page, and am on my third book), but informs the way I look at the world. There's a whole other universe in my head that hums along with me in my day-to-day. That's part of why I'm so skilled as a writer. To ask me to divorce from that is to tell me to stop existing. Sorry, it's how I've always operated.

Lastly, and this is the one I'm really anxious about, I have a fictional husband. Now, looking at my blog, you might say "yeah, no shit," but I don't just ship myself with him. I mean I practice pop-culture Witchcraft, and the Goblin King is my patron. I mean I have a Labyrinth-themed tarot deck that I talk to him with. I mean I held a ritual to spiritually marry him. Basically, I Snape-wived myself.

And guess what? My therapist isn't concerned. It's not hurting my ability to live my life. I have other interests, hobbies, and goals outside of him, which he actively encourages in all our tarot sessions! I wouldn't be doing this if he didn't support me. My IRL spouse is usually there for whatever magical shit I'm doing, and supports me! Some of my closest friends know, and the only complaint I've gotten is "this guy seems important to you, I wish you told me sooner." Hell, my MOTHER knows and supports me, which is huge, because our relationship was pretty damaged after I came out as trans.

If you have a problem with the way I live my life, when literally nobody else does, take a good long look at why. You don't give a fuck about my mental health. You just don't like that I'm weird.

Tl;dr: My mental health is better than it's ever been since embracing the weird, so leave me and my imaginary husband Marak Sixfinger alone.