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#other than that im very fond of them
creaturetap · 22 days
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merfolk varieties based on specific sea creatures!! i always love bringing real-world animals into fantasy designs
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nyaskitten · 1 year
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One day I truly wanna just get sooo deep into the different cultures that kind of exist in Ninjago but in the weird Ninjago fashion of taking bits and pieces and horribly misrepresenting them.
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yume-fanfare · 1 year
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also my future masterpiece for when im done with it
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mxbitters · 1 year
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my cramps are very bad and i am hungry and kind of want 2 cry but at least i can make them be in love <3
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princekirijo · 1 year
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If you're willing to... tell me a bit about Spiderfiend!
Alright its time. So Spiderfiend in short is my Spidersona! He's very similar to me but not exactly. I changed like little details about him and also how he looks too (he's way buffer than me LMAO and his face is slightly different). For some basic details:
Name: Prince Parker Current Alias: Spiderfiend Pronouns: He/Him Reality: Earth 1408 Identity: Secret known only to Gwen Stacy Height: 5'10 Eye Color: Dark Brown Hair Color: Auburn (reddish brown basically) Family: Unnamed Birth family, Dr Odelia Octavius (adoptive mother), May Parker (adoptive mother - deceased). Friends: Gwen Stacy Love Interest: Rose Jane (RJ) Watson
Bitten by: Spiny Orb Weaver genetically altered by the scientists at OckTech Powers: Wall Crawling, Regeneration, Superhuman Strength/Stamina/Speed/Agility/Durability/Reflexes, Spider Sense, Organic Webs (come from his wrist ONLY), Retractable Claws Demonic Powers: Pyrokinesis, Extra Enhanced Supernatural Eyes (basically four extra eyes that help him see spirits and in the dark), Extra Arms (they're like spirit arms?? Idk how to describe them). Weaknesses: Salt.
Bio: Prince Parker was 15 yrs old when he got bit. It happened on a school field trip to OckTech industries, he had been separated for the group looking for the bathroom and stumbled upon an unused lab. A small orb weaver crawled onto him and bit him on the arm. What Prince didn't realize is that this spider was deceased, but currently possessed by a high ranking Prince of Hell, Mordred. Naturally after being bit, he started to feel a little sick and was taken home. When he got home, he passed out and woke up in a strange fiery throne room, Mordred's domain. Here Mordred explains that (for reasons that are unknown to himself) a number of demons have escaped Hell (Hell is just a demon dimension I haven't thought about it much more than that) and he needs a human to help him bring them back. He argues that because he has made Prince a stronger human (had to spider bite him) he owes him. He then asks Prince to sign a contract: in exchange for even more power Prince would become a pawn an ambassador of sorts for Mordred and help him return the demons back to hell (aka Mordred takes Prince's soul). However Mordred kinda fucks up his own contract (he's not the most diligent of demons) and the actual terms are basically that they own each other's souls. Prince suggests that instead they work together as partners, and that he will happily send the demons back to where they came from, and in return Mordred can help him protect the people of New York. Mordred reluctantly agrees and Prince wakes up. And thus, Spiderfiend, the spider who harnesses the power of a demon to fight demons and humans alike and protects New York!
That's the main kinda info and origin story. I'm gonna put some more notes undercut if you're interested :]
So these are the extra notes:
So I mentioned in the lil bio that May is dead. That is what Miguel would consider Fiend's canon event! When Prince was 12, he and May were coming home from a day out (idk I haven't got all the details yet ahah) and they got mugged by thugs. The thugs might belong to a group that could be important late? I'm kinda starting a lot of stuff from scratch after I scrapped my old lore so a lot of this stuff is subject to change. Anyway May tried to reason with them, thugs didn't listen and one of them ended up accidentally shooting May. The ambulance + police + Odelia arrived to find young Prince crying holding his adoptive mother who was very much dead. This death really changed Prince and its why he demanded that Mordred help him protect others, because he always dreamed of being strong enough to protect others, because he failed to protect May (he blames himself for her death).
Yes Odelia is Doc Ock. She also created the spider that bit Prince. She also knows Spiderfiend is Prince, and is aware Prince knows. Prince knows she's Doc Ock but doesn't she knows he's Spiderfiend. It's complicated 💀
I mentioned before that Mordred gives Prince rings. Basically for every demon power Prince gets, Mordred give him a silver ring. These rings cannot be taken off, as they are proof of the contract between the two. Now for most Spidermen the uncle Ben saying is "with great power comes great responsibility". For Fiend however, its Mordred who delivers the line "great power comes at a great price". That's because with every ring, Prince becomes a little more... corrupted. The corruption which would eventually make him lose his mind and go out of control, (this would happen once there's a ring on all his fingers i.e. 10 rings). It also affects his body in the form of these scar/tattoo like markings. That's why Prince only has a small amount of demon powers, because with every demonic power he gains, he slowly loses his mind (this is not something Mordred can prevent something something nature of humans and demons interacting). Also as for how the powers are picked, usually Prince will pick them based on the dire situation he's in.
The last little note is that some of the villains in my universe will be classic Spiderman villains with a demonic twist. I think the two big ones would be Lizard - Curt Conners got possessed by a high ranking demon and was transformed into a reptile like demon - and Norman Osborn aka Green Goblin - who I will say nothing about for now. There will probably be more but that's all I have for now.
Oh and currently the suit is black and purple! Black and purple being colors associated with demons and corruption and are also intimidating which fits Fiend pretty well (Fiend is only intimidating in appearance though that mf is goofy as hell 💀). If you wanna see my current draft the suit I could share it in dms I'm too shy to post it rn 👉👈
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rigels-nigels · 11 months
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Girl help I've acquired possibly yet another expensive hobby
#op#2 of them in fact#currently making a frame weaving loom (and by that i mean my dad idk enough about wood working and this wood is too expensive to fuck up)#and getting into mechanical keyboards#i already have a lotta yarn so the real costs rn are the keyboards#which are like at least 100usd a pop#what sucks is that they all seem to be 60% keyboards or tkl's and like. i need my fn and number pad keys pls and thx#debated sacrificing the num pad and getting a seperate one bc wowza these custom boards are absolutely gorgeous but#i am on such a budget and a cheap (cheap!!!) keyboard i found that i quite like is still gonna run me 200cad#if i got a pretty keeb and a seperate numpad i could easily be looking at $500+ like lordy#that's not even counting the switches i want to get (gateron baby kangs which are. $66. I'm assuming in usd bc it doesn't actually say)#anyway debating on whether or not i should order the keyboard now or wait till later cuz like is it even gonna be there later?#so much of this stuff is temporary and u never know#its a 96% keyboard and it has a calculator button!! only other board ive seen with that is my dads maybe 2005 wireless microsoft#so useful tbh#such a pretty board too all things considered#and finding a nice board like that with the numpad is not easy lemme tell ya like i was truly considering a ducky which.#i cant say im quite fond of their logo among other things#i think its more of a cream than white but u cant win em all#hmm to purchase now or to not purchase now‚ that is the question.... i could technically afford it but then#there's ComicCon + cost of supplies and whatnot for opening up my shop which is gonna be probably at least a hundred...#and then i would like to get some nice wool skirts for the winter/now bc pants are of the devil which is gonna be another 100/150 or so...#augh#i think the government should give me more money i think that would be very sexy of them to do#anyway can you believe i went on my phone to find a banana bread recipe then did all this instead? crazy#hashtag adhd life
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junk-culture · 11 months
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HMMMM..... omd playing near me very soon.... and tickets are still available...........
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arataka-reigen · 9 months
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jason decided to bury those feelings deep down inside him. sent them right to the pits of tartarus where no one would ever see em.
He is so valid for that
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meowmeowmessi · 1 year
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NOT THIS??? https://twitter.com/Teta_2023/status/1644126646415560706
They act like the terms of his contract aren't publicly available and we didn't see it all play out since last season omg they really believe this innocent little blorbo image they've made up for this grown ass man and his European superiority complex so tired of them
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angelsdean · 2 years
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following around 50 chill spn blogs is thee only way to experience this fandom like literally all i want to see is destiel and talk abt deancas being in lorrrveee 
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I've been thinking a lot lately about Delirium and the way she speaks. She talks around a concept, never hitting it head on but glancing off through a series of metaphors and related concepts that explain things far better than wording them straight might. It's very relatable, and I think that's why I like her; that's how I think.
To me, the world isn't composed of precisely defined concepts but a series of interconnected existences which can all, ultimately, be related to each other. I also experience things in the incredibly specific manner Delirium seems to. I have sensitivities largely untethered from aversions, meaning that while I don't often find things deeply unpleasant or intolerable, I still experience them with an unusual specificity which often defies concise explanation. The best way I can convey certain feelings or experiences is through other feelings, experiences, and concepts to weave together a series of approximations that through their similar and dissimilar traits narrow down to what I'm trying to describe. Delirium does this too, and it's treated as a part of her that's no better or worse than any other. There are those that don't understand and those that do, and those that at least try to are awarded for their efforts because finally and most importantly, she genuinely has something to say. Her speech patterns are deceptively rambling because she takes a long time to say what she means to say, while simultaneously saying exactly it.
Delirium is neurodivergent coded in such a cathartic way because of this. I feel her frustration and joy because I know what it's like to be the person trying to explain something that has no words to assign, asking all of the time if there's a word for what she's feeling as a rhetorical and genuine question so that she can explain something without explaining it and call into question why we feel everything must be precisely laid in the place of as few words as possible. She is incredibly intelligent, but loses track of all of what's happening in a far more obvious way than most because there's just so much to keep track of, which is also very relatable as a neurodivergent person. Without putting labels on the experience, she perfectly captures it. I just... I like Delirium quite a lot, and think she'd be very good at post-modern literature.
#i hope to god this comprehensible#im trying so hard to get this shit in a line exactly becaude of why i like her#theres jusy SO MUCH to say its very hard to keep it straight and many more things to focus on beyond it#i love that delirium is treated by the narrative as an intelligent and wise being that just conveys that in an unconventional way#shes like my mirror metaphor. no mirror can light upon the minutae without shattering and no shattered mirror can see the bigger picture.#shes shattered but knows from when she was whole what the full picture looks like but she gets lost in all of the fragments#which gives her an incredibly unique and valuable perspective#at a surface level it seems as if she's an offensive depiction of mental illness but once you go deeper you realize shes not for the very-#reason she at first seemed to be. she embodies what is looked down upon but its told through side comments and events that theres more to-#her than the seeming irrationality.#she picks up and puts things down as she remembers them but that doesnt mean any one thing is any less valuable than any other#the ephemeral quality of her attentions dont diminish their value.#i have a lot of thoughts about her i just. am very fond.#and the way she and dream truly demonstrate the dichotomy of mental illness and neurodivergence makes me froth at the mouth.#he knows what shes saying most of the time and knows where shes at whether he admits it to himself or not because shes just externalizing-#what exists solely internally for him. hes better at masking and that is their difference which makes Such a statement oh my god when you-#think about how each are treated and understood.#it took me like. two weeks to organize these thoughts btw. they float in little brain clouds <3#i need to watch everything everywhere all at once#anyway#delirium of the endless#the sandman meta#the sandman#raspberry rambles
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cescalr · 2 years
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Buffy is so insane about Spike for real
#their enmity is baked into their very beings hes a predator of humans shes a predator of vampires and yet#ehen she says she qants him out of her life for good she doesnt wven try and kill him she just uninvites him from her house like girl what#and then four episodes later she kisses him flat on the mouth like honey..... pls make sense#buffy is so fucked up and spike is so fucked up so it works but any other ship tries to be like them fails bc they always#screw up the power dynamics and motivations and like#buffy sees spike as inhuman as less than as inferior as unworthy as wrong and bad and everything she shouldnt want but in a very#like a very specific way like hes just not a person to her for ages she has a huge complex abt it but also#shes the one person to treat him like a man and not a monster and its like love. pls. buffy pls.#im just saying that buffy is equally as crazy wet rat pathetic romantic as spike shes just not as much of a poet so she prefers to display#this through actions rather than worda. we hear spike's sanity re buffy slowly spiralling and we See buffy's#spike dowsnt beleive her words buffy dowsnt belibe his actions ahhhhhh#(her love language is actions its why she kisses him s5 and shes so fond in s7 his love language is words but he cant trust hers and she#cant trust his so-)#im normal about this. i watched buffy ages 6-14 im soooo normal about this#spuffy wasnt a major facet of my life growing up nooo not at all#(first proper actual otp of mine was spuffy for real. theyre so weird ♡)#spuffy is why i like steo maleo staleo theyre soooo spuffy fucked up triad my beloved !*#*♡#not typing that out again to replace the ! with ♡ anyways carrying on#my taste in buffy ships is a little questionable but im right that spuffy is the best and epitome and the one and only the blueprint and#the spuffy its The etl and nothinf should try and copy it because thats a TERRIBLE IDEA OH GOD#if you dont do spuffy exactly right (even btvs kinda fucked up w seeing red. i get the intent but Oh God)#then you get something unhealthy in a bad way rather than an interesting intermediary (s6) before it gets good (s7) way#like buffy treats him like shit so he treats her like shit so she treats him like shit so he- its cyclical but spike chooses to break the#cycle to maybe go die instead of continue their hurting of each other but its#a little too late and horribly timed so its#complicated and then he goes crazy and buffy doesnt know what to feel and its hhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!#s7 spuffy ♡♡♡♡ s6 fucked up spuffy ♡♡♡ s5 buildup spuffy ♡♡♡♡ s4 pre spuffy ♡♡♡♡ love all spuffy#their ship name is as messy as they sre spuffy that sounds terrible ♡ love that for them#i dont talk about btvs on here much anymore but know im really really fond of it in a totally normal way
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get-more-bald · 18 days
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one thing I dislike about the extended edition is that the added characters are voice-acted in english and no other translation as far as I know
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fedoranon · 5 months
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Call me Peerless Cucumber the way I keep reading books that skate around the interesting bits of the story all fucking day, leaving me to yell at the clouds, shaking my fist impotently
3 in a row!!!!!!
#the fucking strength of will its taking to not tag the books rn with how sleep deprived and crabby i am is2g#at least two of them are very popular; when/if i wanna nuke my blog i might post the rants#its called the *** *** series not the a bunch of very nice aliens eat various meals series#the other one!!! sets up a very interesting frame story mystery and then infodumps all the main characters back stories#(which last centuries because Wizards™) meanwhile im like?!?! what about the mystery?!??!?#and the third one i dealt with for the whole first book because other than the mid sex tangents the plot was ~fairly competently moved along#not a fan of the one person = one unique power setup but whatever its popular rn and xmen did it well so it is possible#but in the 2nd book one of the pov characters just kept going 'there she is. the woman i had sex with. i sure did have sex with her. and wan#t to do it again. too bad she hates me. but! someday she wont hate me or will at least be resigned to having sex with me!' and like he alway#s was obsessed with her but in the 1st book he at least had a goal and a whole arc going from indifference to hate to begrudging respect to#fond exasperation to hero worship to having sex to wishing he didnt have to betray her. which was movement !!!#like i knew it was a romance novel but when she's like 'i have to negotiate with the prince to find a place for my people' and he's like#'shes so hot in those pants' im just 🤦#anyway i probably will finish the first book i was complaining about in the hopes that we do circle back to the mystery & bc i listed them#from most to least recent lol#so yeah. 👑🥒 out lmao
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m4tthewmurd0ck · 3 months
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did some force take you because i didn’t pray?
── aegon x fem!reader (you’re one of helaena’s lady’s in waiting)
the 2 times Aegon had someone there to comfort him
(i’m slightly changing things but just go with it pls)
small a/n before we begin: no use of y/n, i do my best to avoid descriptors BUT do use she / her and mention reader being shorter than aegon. when he hugs / holds you he is able to rest his head on yours. also i know everyone has titles and long names but to save time and also make it easier i just use first names. changing aegon’s rant just so im not word for word with the show.
also disclaimer: i know aegon is not a good person by any means! this is just the alternate reality version of him where things could turn out different if he’s shown genuine love and care
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For as long as you’ve known the Targaryen family, it dawns on you one day that you’ve never seen Aegon cry.
In the beginning, that didn’t mean much. You were one of Helaena’s ladies’ in waiting, and only ever saw the then prince on occasion.
Then Aegon was crowned King, and you saw him a bit more as Helaena was required to be present at what felt like too many ceremonies. Because you were almost exactly the same age, although it was against an unspoken rule, she came to see you as a friend.
When the twins were born and Helaena saw how good you were with them, it seemed to anyone who was around that she wanted you near at all times. She practically begged you to begin sleeping in her chambers to help with the fussing and crying at night, and of course you said yes. It occurred to you later that night that she could’ve just demanded it.
It wasn’t long at all before the twins also formed an attachment, as their mothers need to have you close by didn’t lessen even as they got older.
Though they both loved you, Jaehaerys in particular, was very fond of you. Jaehaera was a lot more independent and chose to play with her dolls or little trinkets by herself. But the boy, the other ladies’ in waiting and even Helaena herself, often called him your little shadow.
Whatever task you were given, it wasn’t uncommon for Jaehaerys to be nearby. As he grew a little older, he began to ask questions.
Once, he asked why his mother wore such fancy dresses, but yours and the rest of the ladies’ were only ever plain. It hadn’t occurred to you that because you spent so much time with him and had a big hand in raising him, he saw you as family and genuinely didn’t understand why you dressed differently.
Luckily, you didn’t need to answer. Aegon appeared from around the corner, calling for his son. Once Jaehaerys ran to him, he gave you a nod before grabbing his sons hand and leading him in the opposite direction.
To the King, you were a mystery. He knew his sister preferred you to the other ladies’ in waiting, and he knew she’d rather you over any of them to be looking after the twins when she was busy, but he didn’t know why. Still, his sister was set in her ways, and in the end he simply decided it was best to not ask questions. Even he could see that you cared deeply for his children, and for him that was enough.
On the day Aegon wished for his son to sit in on a council meeting, Jaehaerys was being a bit difficult that morning. For whatever reason, he refused to go unless it was you that escorted him.
After assuring him that you’d only get the boy in the room and then quickly make your exit, Aegon nodded and led the 2 of you into the room.
Just like you knew he would, Jaehaerys immediately went for “the ball” as he called it, in front of Tyland Lannister. You could see irritation immediately all over the man’s face, but to his credit he did his best to hide it.
The third time the ball was grabbed, you were the only one that heard it when Tyland snapped. The meeting hadn’t yet begun but you could see he already wished it to be over.
“That child doesn’t belong in here,” he muttered to himself, unaware that you could hear him.
“I will escort him to his mothers chambers now. Is the heir to the throne bothering you a bit too much?” That last bit slipped out, and you immediately regretted it as the room grew silent and all eyes turned to the 3 of you. After a few tense seconds, most everyone resumed their conversations.
You slowly stood up, Jaehaerys now on your back as that was the only way he agreed to leave the room. “Apologies Ser Lan—”
“Hold on,” the room stilled once again when it was Aegon that spoke this time. He looked at you, then back at Tyland. “She has nothing to apologize for. And I believe she asked you a question. Is the heir to the throne, my son, is he bothering you?”
Even Alicent opted to look down and fiddle with her hands rather than step in. You didn’t think you’d ever been more grateful for Aegon that in that moment.
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ONE.
On the night Jaehaerys was murdered, you were knocked unconscious. You’d later find out it was the man they called Blood that hurt you, but at the time all you knew / remembered was waking to a loud noise. Immediately you got out of bed, but before you could properly realize what was happening, you felt something sharp across your cheek. And before you’d even had time to cry out, something hard hit the side of your head, causing everything to go dark.
When you woke, you ignored the maesters requests to stay in bed. As soon as you stood up, you almost wished you’d listened as you immediately felt dizzy. That was also when you felt the stinging pain of the cut on your cheek. The maester explained that you wouldn’t need to have it stitched up, but he hadn’t yet bandaged you because even in your sleep, you tossed and turn whenever he tried to tend to that injury.
After agreeing to not over exert yourself, you were off to find Helaena. It was then that another one of the ladies’ in waiting broke the news to you.
When you were let in to Alicent’s chambers, and locked eyes with Helaena, she immediately stood up from her spot on the floor and ran to you, Jaehaera still held tightly in her arms.
“Are you alright?” You knew she would be with the maester if she were injured, but you still had to ask. “They said—”
“He’s dead,” was all Helaena could say. That and “they killed him”.
What felt like an eternity later, and you’d gotten Jaehaera to sleep and convinced Helaena to at least lay down with her, you were unsure of what to do. Only a few moments later, you found yourself wandering the halls. Every inch of the place had been searched almost immediately, so you know that the halls were alright once again.
Part of you felt like you didn’t have a right to mourn Jaehaerys, as he wasn’t actually your son. You were just trying to process the fact that you’d never see his little smile again. Never again would you turn a corner and be greeted with that sweet voice asking where the 2 of you were going, because him staying with anyone else was out of the question.
You were one of the first to hold him after he was born, and had seen him every day since. To already be in a world where he no longer existed, it seemed cruel.
When you stopped walking, you realized that you’d come to Aegon’s chambers. The doors were obviously closed, and you had only managed to take a few steps back the way you came, when you heard them open.
“Oh, good,” you turned around, surprised that it was Alicent that had spoken. “Did Helaena send you?”
You stuttered as you tried to form a response, but she seemed to take your silence as a confirmation.
“He’s distraught, obviously. I’m not sure he’ll speak to you but…” she seemed unsure of herself. In the end she sort of motioned towards the doors, before turning and walking away.
Before you even raised your hand to knock, you heard sobbing. It was then that you realized you were wrong. Yes, your heart could break even more.
It didn’t escape your notice that Alicent left the room as her son was sobbing. You knew she wasn’t the comforting type, but you couldn’t imagine simply walking the other way.
After a few knocks, you weren’t surprised when there was no answer. As you slowly opened the door, then shut it behind you, you thought to yourself that you should’ve thought about what to say beforehand. Here was this normally stone-faced man, showing more emotion now than he had in the entire time you’d known him. And after more thought, you realized that perhaps Alicent had tried to comfort him but was asked to leave.
“Who is there?” Aegon finally seemed to notice someone else’s presence, but hadn’t actually looked up. His head remained in his hands, and you could hear him trying to quiet his cries.
“I am sorry, I— I just thought I should check on you.” You noticed how pathetic you sounded only after the words left your mouth.
He let out a humorless chuckle, then slowly stood up and made his way towards you. “Check up on me?”
You nodded. “I just wanted to see how you were doing. Stupid question to ask if you’re okay, I know.”
He studied your face for a moment, and his guard came down ever so slightly. He believed your concern to be genuine. And for Gods sakes, his own mother couldn’t even comfort him. She left quietly and Aegon knew it was in the hopes that he wouldn’t know she’d ever entered the room.
Still, he couldn’t bring himself to answer you. Instead he returned to his sitting position, once again leaning forward so that his head was in his hands.
“I should’ve been there,” he spoke so softly that you didn’t quite hear him.
“Pardon?”
He looked up at you, fresh tears in his eyes. “I should’ve been there!” When he saw how you flinched, he regretted being so loud. But a larger part of him didn’t care. You were the first person to allow him to speak freely. He needed to let out his emotions somewhere. “I should have been there. But I thought who’d be stupid enough to try anything here? Look at how wrong I was.”
“There’s nothing you could’ve done,” you shook your head.
“That is bullshit!” He stood up and began pacing back and forth. “My son is DEAD! It was an act of revenge, why else do you think the rest of you were left alive?”
You were about to ask if they already know who is responsible, but it’s as if he read your mind.
“My brother kills her son, so she has taken it upon herself to exact revenge, a son for a son!” He laughs, but again there is no humor in his tone. “My son, the heir to the throne, he is gone. Murdered while he slept and I did nothing!”
As he sat crying, you kneeled in front of him. Trying not to think about it too much, you placed your hands on his and forced him to look at you.
“Everyone around knows how much you love that boy. And he loved you just as much.” You decided it was better to not repeat that he couldn’t have done anything. Right now in front of you, was a father who needed to grieve.
Aegon knew he should be cautious. His sister knew you well, but he did not. He was already ashamed that you’ve seen him cry. Yet you didn’t seem repulsed. You allowed him to rant and didn’t try to shove advice down his throat. His son was gone, but you reminded him of the love that existed, that still exists.
The angry part of him wanted to shout at you to leave, but he couldn’t bring himself to yell again in that moment. So he allowed your hands to remain on his as he cried for his son.
You prayed that no one would walk in, as you stood up and pulled Aegon up with you. Before he could ask what was happening, you gave him a hug.
His first instinct was again, one of anger. He resisted the brief urge to push you away. After a few seconds, he even surprised himself when he almost melted into your touch. He genuinely couldn’t remember the last time he was in someone else’s embrace like this. And you didn’t ask questions. You only held him and listened to his heartbeat.
He found himself crying again as he returned the gesture and wrapped his arms around you. Although he knew he could never speak of this, and he’d have to ask that you not do the same at some point, he allowed himself to do nothing but mourn the loss of his son as you held him in your arms, and you in his.
He was grateful that at least in this moment, you allowed him to grieve.
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TWO.
After that, there was a noticeable change. Aegon gravitated towards you if he entered a room and you were already there. Everyone noticed, but none dared to speak on the matter, not even Alicent or Otto.
You heard about the meeting in which it was ultimately decided that Jaehaerys’ body would be placed on a carriage led through the streets, so that the public might see just what Queen Rhaenyra was capable of. You didn’t think this was her doing. How could a mother who has just lost her son, inflict that pain onto someone else? Surely she wouldn’t. But everyone else was so sure. And you were but a low-born lady in waiting, so you remained silent.
The thought of Jaehaerys being used, paraded through the streets for all to gawk at, it angered you. Yes, he was a prince. And you understood the message that they hoped it would send, but it didn’t make you any less upset. He was just a boy. You thought of the boy who would run into your embrace whenever you walked in to his mothers chambers.
You couldn’t even imagine how Aegon was feeling. He loved that boy deeply, and you had no doubt that he was pressured into agreeing.
That same night, you were abruptly woken up. Immediately you looked to Helaena’s bed, filled with relief to see her and Jaehaera fast asleep. But it alarmed you that it was Ser Criston Cole of all people, who’d woken you up.
He put a finger to his lips, then turned and exited the room. You made sure you looked at least half decent before you followed him, wondering what on earth possessed him to wake you at such an hour.
“I—” He looked unsure of where to start.
“Has something happened?”
“It’s the King.” He didn’t wait for you to respond, instead turning and practically running out of the room.
As you chased after him, it did occur to you that it was odd for him to fetch the King’s sisters ladies’ in waiting. You also realized that he never technically responded when you asked if something happened.
When the 2 of you finally reached Aegon’s chambers, Criston didn’t even open the door. He didn’t need to though, you could hear the shouting and loud noises from outside.
“Who else is in there?” You fiddled with your hands, unsure of what you were walking into.
Criston merely shook his head. “No one. He kicked everyone out. But I know you helped him that— that night. Can you…?”
Without giving it a second thought, you nodded. Instead of leaving, Criston sort of stood guard right outside the door. You’d seen Aegon angry before, and were secretly relieved that he was outside should anything go wrong.
This time, you didn’t bother knocking. You did, however, try to open and then close the door as quietly as possible.
“I declare war!” It was the first thing you heard since entering the room, and you didn’t bother asking who he was declaring war on.
“My King —”
It was as if he was in a sort of angry trance. You speaking didn’t even cause him to look in your direction.
“I want them all dead! They’ll all pay for this, every fucking one of them!” As he spoke, he moved about the room destroying King Viserys’ carefully and meticulously constructed display.
You could see he needed to let his anger out. And didn’t exactly want to approach him while he held something that could hurt you. Not that he intentionally would, but seeing as he had no reaction to you calling out to him, you didn’t think it wise to sneak up on him.
As the smashing and destruction went on, you could see Aegon begin to wear himself out. It wasn’t so much that the anger was leaving his body, but rather that he was losing the energy to continue. Now, you thought to yourself, was a good time to gauge where he’s at mentally / emotionally.
“My King—” you tried again. This would be a moment you’d come to regret, seeing as you hadn’t considered the fact that Aegon was so blinded by his rage that he hadn’t noticed it was you in the room. Sure he heard the doors open and close, but he assumed it had been one of his men.
Not registering who it was that just spoke, and only hearing that someone was interrupting his rampage, he turned around with an arm swung out. It ended up being sort of a backhanded slap, and unfortunately he was wearing a ring.
Once he realized it was you that he’d just harmed, Aegon froze. His eyes widened and he immediately dropped to his knees.
“Are you hurt? Did I— did I…” He didn’t seem to know what he wanted to ask.
You put a hand to your cheek and examined your fingers, nothing a small amount of blood. He hit almost exactly where you were cut, and by the feel of it you guessed that his hit reopened the wound.
“It’s fine,” you tried to reassure him. “I am sure I will be healed in no time. There is no need—” Before you could finish speaking, he’d fled from the room, but not before hurriedly asking you to stay put.
Only a short while later he returned with the maester quickly following behind him.
As the man tended to your face, you could practically see the gears turning in his head as he debated on speaking. In the end, he decided to ask the question.
“How did you manage to reopen this wound?”
Luckily for you, you’d studied the room and had your answer prepared.
You pointed to a spot on the floor where a glass of wine lay spilt. “I slipped just there. Tried to steady myself and ended up landing on my face and cutting it with one of the broken pieces.”
Because you spoke immediately and with such confidence, your lie was believed.
“Might not heal as well if it’s opened a third time. Still doesn’t need stitches, just try not to fall again, eh?” He gave you a pat on the shoulder before giving you a small jar of ointment to apply to the cut, instructing you to apply it once a day.
As soon as the man left the room, you studied Aegon. He was pacing the entire time, only stopping once the maester had left.
“Why?” He whispered.
You knew what he was asking. “I did not think it would do any good for him to know the truth. I know you didn’t mean to,” you shrugged.
He was almost in a state of shock. Here he’d just injured you, accidentally, sure, but it was still done in anger. And it wasn’t that long ago that he broke down in front of you. Despite all of that, you were still kind to him. You covered for him.
Aegon fell to his knees once again in front of a large portion of the mess he created. “I’m sorry,” he spoke softly.
“My King you do not need to apologize. As I said, I know it wasn’t on purpose.”
He looked up at you, fresh tears in his eyes, and you lost count on how many times your heart broke for him. You joined him on the floor, and put what you hoped was a comforting hand on his shoulder.
“I can’t do anything right,” the first tear fell, but he didn’t bother wiping it away. “I allowed men to break in and murder my son, and this is twice now you’re hurt because of me.”
The fact that he blamed himself for it still, brought tears to your eyes as well.
“No one thinks this was your doing, and I swear to you that I don’t blame you.”
He was silent for a moment, deep in thought. “How am I meant to continue?”
His question caught you off guard. “Pardon?”
“My son is dead. Murdered, and my dear sister that claims to be the rightful heir may not have held the knife but I know she commanded the men that did. How am I supposed to to sit on the throne and continue to rule as if none of this has happened?”
“I do not think anyone expects you to act as if nothing has happened —”
Hearing that caused Aegon to laugh. “Have you met my mother? She is one of the many against me declaring war.”
“This tragedy —”
He cuts you off once again. “Tragedy? Hah! Understatement of the fucking year. And people are already speaking about my sons murder as if it’s a lesson! My grandfather, dear old Otto Hightower, wants to parade my sons body for all to see. Says it will show them the kind of Queen that Rhaenyra really is. You should’ve seen how many nodded their heads in agreement. How do I just hand him over to be stared at, as if he is no more than a piece of meat on display at the market?”
“I hate this,” you finally get a chance to speak. “Jaehaerys was the sweetest little boy I kno—knew. And I wish his death wasn’t being used in this way. A tragedy should not always be a lesson. Sometimes it should be allowed to be just that, a tragedy. I am truly sorry you are having to deal with all of this.”
Something about what you’ve said causes tears to spring to Aegon’s eyes. Perhaps it’s the way you speak so kindly of his son. He knows you genuinely loved the boy, after all. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” His quiet sobs begin as he echoes your use of those 2 words, and when you turned to face him, he practically falls into your embrace. You stop counting how many times he utters I’m sorry. In between the I’m sorry’s, he mostly said his sons name, but you heard your name as well as Helaena and Jaehaera’s.
Night turned into morning and Aegon finds himself in your arms once again. Eventually his sobs had slowed down, and he fell asleep, laying on the hard floor with his head in your lap.
As he slept, you allowed yourself to run your hands through his hair, just for a moment. Aegon let out a content sigh, finding comfort in your movements even in his sleep.
Here was this boy who was feared by many, who didn’t ever want anyone to see him as weak, and yet twice he allowed himself to cry and grieve in front of you.
At some point, you gently wake Aegon and convince him to get into bed.
As you take one last look at him before exiting his chambers, you can’t help but silently hope that the future would be a little kinder to him.
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esoteriamaya · 1 month
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Astro Observations Pt.. ????
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No, I cant keep up with the number. Lol. Lets go!
7th house placements def need to pick a side. They also need to put their foot down. Never let people who disrespect you back in. And if you're going to cut off one person for doing it, you gotta do it with everyone else. Just cause they relationship is long term doesn't mean much.
10th house placements need to focus on the things they truly love vs always digging into what they need to do for their career. Worry less about your ambitions from time to time and enjoy the flow. I know ti sucks but, you gotta relax a little.
Sun/Pluto placements can have a lot of rebirth experiences, but one thing that is important is their for growth. Which always seems to come through transformation, but not all the time. It comes through people, and the expression of being around people who love you. Thats what transform them the most. They need the world to truly see them for who they are, other wise they will only show one side of them, and that will ultimately be the version they transform into but it will only kill them from the inside and not benefit them.
Venus/Neptune placements have an inkling for romanticism, fantasy and philosophy in their relationships. They need something that makes them breathe words of enlightenment, purity and emotion. They have the tendency to make things seem more than what they are, rose colored glasses are no match for them at times. A little insight on them is that their emotions can go a little array when they aren't surrounded by the right people. They tend to suck in energy like a sponge, this is neptune energy. But with them you can notice a small difference between them and their lovers, like is it making them glow or is it draining? Thats what they need to ask themselves at times.
Jupiter in the 11th house can proudly be the most optimistic friend in the group. They could become the leader of an organization. They could be the one people come to for advice on certain matters or they could easily be someone people go to when they want to learn more about something. Very charismatic and sharp. Stern but sweet. A little rough around the edges but they get things done!
5th house Suns have a universe of emotions that express themselves in all types of ways. They'll have kids that are just as sweet & charismatic as them. They are a NATURAL at making people laugh! They normally have gorgeous spirits and people do enjoy their company.
Gemini placements have an alluring nature to them due to their minds. Their mysticism is through the art of words and are very tricky individuals. They have come here to master the mind and find ways to fully express their intellect in hopes to connect with as many as possible. They are a one of one when it comes to this area of life.
Moon in the 1st are seen as thoughtful, loving sweet creatures who everyone seems to be super fond of. They hide a lot of their emotions but sometimes we can tell when they're not okay.
Theres just something about them that brightens a persons day. They try to make a good example to others by the why they embrace their feelings and this usually inspires others to do the same.
Sun square neptune - Might be in the wrong crowd from time to time. Has to stay sober most of the time, getting into drugs and alcohol can be addictive and might not be worth it at times. Genuinely misunderstood. Might need a doctor to figure out why they act the way that they do (all jokes).
Very spiritual, this is contained tho. They dont really open up to people about religion or anything connected to spirituality/God. Its their own thing, and its very special/private to them.
Moon/Uranus placements - Needs a doctor. Okay im joking lol. Anyways their lucky to have this one because their minds are very capable of entering into mass amounts of information that is truly locked away from the rest of the world. Like their neptune friends, they have a connection to divine sources that strikes down to them from time to time almost like a brain blast. Could be a oracle, psychic, someone who just knows whats going to happen in the next years to come etc. Could be really creative too.
4th house placements can be friends you can depend on all of the time. They have a warm, soothing personality and their the type of friends you grow up into adulthood with.
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