#other friends. like everyone else does. I don’t do anything or see anyone. I just obsess over a special interest and rot in my room
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klaineharmony · 3 days ago
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Why We Ship: Josh/Donna (The West Wing)
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Okay, friends. This post has been sitting in my drafts for SIX YEARS. (No kidding.) And since my West Wing obsession is currently on full display, I am finally going to talk about the OTP to end all OTPs: to wit, exactly why we ship Josh Lyman and Donnatella Moss untill the end of time.
I have to preface this post with a couple of things. First, this year is the 25th Anniversary of Season 1 of this incredible show, and I have been so emotional seeing the reunion photos, Janel’s article about Donna, her exchange with Brad on Twitter, Mary McCormack and Melissa Fitzgerald’s new book, the cast’s appearance on the Emmys, just everything that has been about celebrating this show that won 26 Emmys, in large part due to a flawless cast and Aaron Sorkin’s writing. (Where did the time go?!)
Second: a bit of fandom history as I lived it. What I want everyone to understand about these two is that we ALL shipped them. Every single one of us, from Season 1 onward. It didn’t matter who else you shipped (and you could ship other couples, it was fine!), who else you thought could have been a couple, who else was paired off with whom in the show - we all shipped Josh and Donna. I’ve never seen anything like it before or since. It wasn’t the original plan for them to end up as a couple, but they had such chemistry, and Brad and Janel are so exquisitely perfect at what they do, that they created seven seasons of flirting and hilarity and angst and heartache that had you rooting for Josh and Donna the whole way. 
Third, and this is just me talking: Aaron Sorkin left the show after Season 4, and he left this perfect setup for Josh and Donna to get together. I don’t know who was in the room after he was, but they decided to write another 2 1/2 seasons of agony. Of absolutely soul-shredding agony, watching Josh and Donna break each other into pieces before finally sorting themselves out. In one way I really love that arc - it gave Donna a lot of wonderful independence and let her become her own person, away from Josh, and I love that for her! Not to mention that it allowed Brad and Janel to show entirely new dimensions of their characters, and the ways they interacted when things were hard, and angry, and resentful, and Josh and Donna had to find some way to function without each other. The acting is masterful. In another way, it was so painful to watch that I wished (at the time) that the writers would have taken Aaron’s opening and found a less gut-wrenching way for them to form a relationship as a couple. I occasionally still wish that, as the painful section of Josh and Donna’s relationship was in the darkest and most stressful part of the show as well. It felt like the writers started going for grim realism instead of Aaron’s signature brand of hope. It was hard to watch, and honestly still is, despite the still incredible writing and acting.
All of that is my preface to singing the praises of these two to the skies and beyond. Why do we ship Josh and Donna? Let me count the ways.
First: these two know the best and the worst about each other almost from the get-go. Before Donna even meets Josh, she knows he’s frantically busy, bad at answering his phone, totally disorganized in his office, and high maintenance in general. Josh figures out her history with Dr. Freeride during their first conversation, but he’s also impressed with her earnestnesss and determination. We also know that he ends up at Donna’s apartment sometimes when he’s drunk. We know Donna keeps boundaries around him after he’s shot. Donna is the one who figures out that Josh probably has PTSD, before anyone else does. We see Josh basically put his job on the line to protect Donna when she lies under oath to Cliff Calley. These two protect each other, fiercely and with everything they have.
Second: their banter is an art form. It is flirty and hilarious, and also smart and clever, and in the midst of it you realize just how smart Donna is. She can keep up with Josh Lyman! The smartest guy in the Democratic Party! What’s more, she’s not afraid to challenge him and tell him he’s wrong. And Josh loves that about her. As much as he teases her about her positions and her questions and her endless challenges to him, he loves that she isn’t scared of him and is willing to push him to be better. How many people tell Josh Lyman no, or even dare to argue with him?? Almost no one, and they can’t even begin to be as funny and attractive as Donna when they do manage it. And sometimes it goes from arguing policy to being downright flirty, and you just want them to give in and kiss already! It’s about the *tension.*
Third: All the silent communication. There is a post on my dash somewhere that has all kinds of gifs of Josh and Donna touching each other in all these little ways, and a quote from Janel where she talks about how she and Brad found all of them, all these little touches that indicated sexual tension and flirtatiousness but also affection and familiarity. Josh and Donna are also masters of looks that speak. They can look at each other in all kinds of ways, and exchange all kinds of information without saying a word - and most of the time we as viewers know exactly what that exchange is, which just says volumes about Brad and Janel’s acting skills. 
Fourth: Even when things are at their worst, even when Josh and Donna are hurt and angry and barely speaking, you can see how much they still love each other. You can see they want to fix things and just don’t know how, don’t know what to do to move past the anger and hurt feelings and sense of betrayal. Even though they are both in tremendous pain, you never get the sense that they stop loving each other, just that they are at a point where they need to be apart long enough to sort themselves out individually, before they can come back together. And as painful as it is to watch, it’s also quite extraordinary.
Bottom line: Josh and Donna love each other. They adore each other. They fight for each other, and are willing to risk everything for each other, again and again. Their love and connection is never absent and always visible, whether they are flirting or arguing or absolutely furious, whether they are protective or panicked or exultant. They love each other through every moment of everything, and it’s impossible not to love watching them while they find their way to each other.
See the previous entries in this series (and please feel free to add your own!):
Neo/Trinity (The Matrix)
Steve/Peggy (Marvel/MCU)
Jack/Sarah (Newsies)
Harry/Hermione (Harry Potter)
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seilon · 1 year ago
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man im really fucking bad at hanging out with people no wonder i have like two friends
#sometimes it’s worse than usual and tonight was one of those times#I just. couldn’t get myself to be interested in doing anything they wanted to do#just was not having a good time and for no real reason#also every time they talk about stuff they do with other friends and whatever it hits unreasonably hard that oh yeah! I don’t have#other friends. like everyone else does. I don’t do anything or see anyone. I just obsess over a special interest and rot in my room#and it’s completely my own fault because I can’t fucking socialize#idk but anyway that’s just. a part of it. aside from that i was just. yeah not interested in anything#I wasn’t even tired or lethargic or anything like I usually am so it’s just a fucking waste of everyone’s time including mine#that I’m. like this#idk. I should drink a lot more next time. probably.#im more sociable and actually somewhat enjoyable to be around that way. sucks that it takes so fucking much to get me drunk lol#god I hate being like this I hate that social conditions have to be so specific or else my brain short circuits like this#I honestly think it was largely something to do with there being two people hanging out that usually aren’t there#even if they’re not new people to me or anything and they’re friends and all#I guess I was just kind of only in the headspace to hang out way more casually with the two main people I tend to be around the most#conveniently the two people who have played yakuza and aren’t as annoyed by me playing it or talking about it or whatever#I hate being so consumed by interests like this where I literally don’t want to talk about anything else basically#I wish I could actually infodump to my friends#but yeah . only one of them I sorta do that to and even that I’m just. idk I still feel like I can very easily be too much#there’s something very wrong with me#and now I’m gonna feel bad the rest of the week because that was my only shot at social interaction for the week. and now I’ll be in my room#being. the mentally ill husk of a person that I am the rest of the week.#woohoo#im going to split my skull open I hate this I hate being so bad at being a person#kibumblabs
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nanamis-angel · 3 months ago
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𝐈𝐧 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 ♡︎
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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ৹ You and Suguru have been dating in secret and it hasn't been easy but it's totally worth it. So, while at a party, Suguru slips away to see you, not thinking anyone is around. But just how long does it take Satoru and Shoko to figure out what's going on?
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ৹ suguru x fem!reader, fluff, making out (oop), you and suguru get caught kissing (losers lol), suguru is annoyed, satoru is the annoyer ™, shoko is a girls girl, yaga mention.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ৹ 2.1k
𝐚/𝐧 ৹ was literally in class when I got this idea so I started writing it in my notebook. i'm shameless (hearts divider by @/s-h-o-w-y).
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“You could have practically any girl here, Suguru and yet you keep ignoring them all!” Gojo exclaimed at his best friend. The two of them, along with you and Shoko were at a house party of a friend. And despite his flirty personality, he noticed that a lot of the girls their age seemed to flock to Suguru. Yet he ignored their advances every single time.
“I’m just not interested,” Geto replied, putting his hands in his pockets.
Satoru scoffed. “C’mon, you can’t possibly be serious. We’re at a party, have some fun! It’s not like Yaga is breathing down our necks right now or anything.”
But again, Suguru shook his head. “Knock yourself out, I’ll pass.” He shrugged it off.
Up until a couple of months ago, the two boys would go out and meet plenty of girls and would just have fun. But as of late, Suguru had just been ignoring any girls who came his way. Politely, of course, but he always made sure that they knew he was simply uninterested. Gojo would watch as Suguru would turn them away, his jaw agape. He simply couldn’t understand it.
Truth was, Suguru had been dating you for the past couple of months but the two of you had mutually decided to keep it a secret for the first little bit. You were still navigating relationships and you wanted that aspect of privacy. Suguru, of course, wanted to give it to you. But that did make seeing each other quite difficult.
At first, Suguru had no desire to attend these parties anymore. Knowing that he’d be approached by the girls there. But Satoru begged him every time, not knowing about his relationship with you. You didn’t want Suguru to miss out on the fun and told him to go anyway. So, he did. He’d just turn away any girl who’d come his way.
Especially since you wanted to keep things on the down low, he couldn’t just tell these girls that he had a girlfriend without the possibility of the word getting out to your friends.
Satoru glanced at two girls who had their eyes set on him. “Suit yourself.” He shrugged off before putting on a flashy grin and walking towards the girls.
The moment Satoru was distracted, Suguru let out a sigh of relief. “Finally,” he groaned. “That should keep him busy for a while.”
Now was finally his time to slip away—to slip away and find you. You had wandered off with Shoko ten minutes ago and he was already itching to see you again. He pulled out his phone and texted you.
“Where are you and Shoko?”
Moments later, your text popped up on his screen. “Don’t know where Shoko went but I’m down near the bathroom.”
Suguru smiled at your message—finally, he could just be with you alone, even if it was just for a minute. He made his way through the house, ignoring anyone and everyone he walked past. He just wanted to see you and he was determined to do so.
Turning around the corner, Suguru saw you in the hallway, leaning against one of the walls and his face lit up. Shoko was nowhere in sight, and neither was anyone else, just you. He understood you wanted to keep the relationship a secret but boy did it make things hard sometimes.
“There you are,” He said, walking up to you. Immediately, his arms were around your waist, and his chin was propped up on your shoulder. “Felt like I was going to suffocate back there.” He mumbled.
You chuckled a little. “That bad, huh?” You asked him with playful empathy.
Suguru nodded his head. “Satoru can’t take a hint that I’m not interested in any of the girls here. But I can’t just outright say why.” He sighed. Keeping your relationship a secret was hard—especially from his best friend.
Mr. “Six eyes sees all, nosey, and in everyone’s business Satoru Gojo” was hard to keep a secret from. Especially when he didn’t understand why Suguru was so uninterested in the girls around him all of a sudden.
There was no rule in school saying you couldn’t date other students—however, Yaga viewed relationships in school as a distraction and while if he found out you and Suguru were together, he couldn’t do much about it, he would just make it very obvious that he didn’t approve. Which in turn, would just make things awkward.
So, all of this together was the reason why your relationship was so private and secret.
“But now… I don’t have to deal with any of these pesky people.” Suguru grinned down at you. Within seconds, he pulled you into one of the rooms right by the bathroom, just so he could kiss you in private—away from everyone else, hoping nobody would come stumbling across the two of you.
Putting far too much faith that no one would, Suguru didn’t close the door all the way. Instead, he got straight to it, not wasting any time by pressing his lips against yours. You were a little taken aback by the sudden kiss and his eagerness but you reciprocated with fervor.
It had been hard having to sneak around all the time to do something as easy and simple as kissing; like conveniently going to the bathrooms around the same time while in class—or saying you were going to get some of the cursed weapons from the shed and Suguru would offer to “come help” you every time.
Needless to say, he was making up for all of the times he wanted to kiss you but couldn’t. He understood and respected your wishes to keep things private but boy were there enough times when he wanted to kiss you, no matter who was around.
His hands slipped from your back, down to your hips, giving them a firm but gentle squeeze. The only time you pulled away was to catch a breath, only for you to reconnect your lips with his moments later. With his hands still on your hips, he pulled you closer, kissing you harder.
Suguru was a great kisser���granted you had no one to compare him to since he was your first boyfriend but he made you feel alive every single time. He was the epitome of an amazing boyfriend. Respectful, sweet, with just the right amount of playfulness. You swore you could love him forever.
You don’t even remember when you fell for him but you were so glad you did.
But before you could continue, you heard a very familiar voice near the doorway, which caused you both to freeze right in your tracks. “Am I interrupting something?”
It was Shoko, standing in the doorway with a little mischievous grin on her face. You finally pulled away from Suguru, your face as red as a tomato and your eyes as wide as ever. “S-Shoko! Where—how’d you get here?” You asked, stumbling over your words.
“Smoke break in the bathroom,” She said, holding up a cigarette.
Of course, a smoke break. In the bathroom. In the bathroom right next to the room, you were just making out with Suguru in. Suguru mentally cursed himself for not closing the door all the way. At least that would’ve given you a second or two to pull away from each other and make things look normal.
“So, how long has this been going on?” Shoko asked, clearly not giving up on her curiosity.
“Um,” You looked at the ground for a moment. “About three and a half months…”
Shoko looked a little surprised. “Wow, that long? I always assumed something was going on between the two of you but I didn’t know you were together—especially for that long already.” She replied. It was decently impressive, given how strict and nosey Yaga was. Not to mention how nosey Satoru was. “And whose idea was it to keep this a secret for so long?”
Suguru pointed at you almost immediately and Shoko let out a snort at his quickness, provoking you to roll your eyes. Shoko’s eyes moved to Suguru. “And just where is Satoru?” She asked, knowing that the two of them were practically attached at the hip on nights like these.
Suguru sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “He’s occupied talking to some girls who were flirting with him earlier.” He answered, feeling slightly bad that he had just dipped. “I took that as a chance to come find [name].”
Shoko’s lips tugged into a grin as she looked you up and down; your lips were still slightly swollen from the passionate kisses you had just shared. “I can see that.” She teased.
Shoko had been your best friend ever since attending school but for some reason, you wanted to die of embarrassment. You wanted nothing more than to crawl into a little ball and blip out of existence. It was pretty embarrassing when you were caught making out with someone, even if it was your best friend who caught you.
“Honestly? I’m just impressed you two managed to keep this a secret for so long.” She said, crossing her arms. “Yaga-sensei is practically breathing down our necks most days and Gojo is awfully nosey.”
“Trust me, it hasn’t been easy,” Suguru muttered under his breath, earning a quick glance from you.
“You’re not going to tell Yaga, are you?” You asked Shoko. Shoko wasn’t a snitch—you knew that much but there was a little anxiety in the back of your mind that word might somehow get out to your teacher and make things awkward in places like the classroom.
“You won’t hear a word from me,” Shoko replied.
You let out a relieved sigh and smiled but it got you wondering why you were even anxious to say something about your relationship before. You reached out and your fingers laced with Suguru’s and he squeezed your hand.
However, just moments later, you heard footsteps coming from behind Shoko and towards the doorway to the room. It was Satoru, stumbling over after hearing your voices. “Is Suguru over here? He just disappeared.” He said, his voice slightly dazed.
But his slight daze immediately went away when he saw you standing right next to Suguru, your hand in his. “Ooooohhh what’s going on here?” He teased, leaning his arm on Shoko’s shoulder. It was pretty obvious what was going on. He had observed enough, and Suguru had talked about you enough to know that you liked each other at the very least.
Shoko rolled him off her shoulder and you narrowed your eyes at Satoru. You knew it was practically impossible for him to keep his mouth shut about certain things and you weren’t taking any chances.
“Keep. Your. Mouth. Shut.” You said firmly. You almost sounded like a mother scolding a young child.
“Okay fine,” He groaned, knowing there was no use in fighting you. He could tease or annoy Suguru all day but you were definitely not the girl he wanted to cross. You were not as forgiving as your boyfriend was. “How come I’m the last one to know about this though?” He looked at Suguru, feigning humorous offense.
Suguru began to walk towards the door, your hand still in his. There was no use in trying to hide anything around Shoko and Satoru anymore, so why would he? “Because you have trouble keeping quiet about certain things.” He replied to Satoru as he passed by him. “AKA you have a big mouth.”
Shoko just snickered, following you and Suguru out of the room. “What? What do you mean?” Satoru exclaimed, following behind the three of you. “I can keep a secret! I promise. C’mon you guys I’m not that bad!”
“Name one secret you’ve kept,” You said, looking back at him over your shoulder.
Satoru hesitated as if he was trying to think of one he could say. But then he crossed his arms and turned his nose up. “Well, I can’t say them because they’re a secret, obviously.”
Although this was obviously not true, it earned around of laughs from the three of you as you returned to the party. Even though this wasn’t how you planned your night to go, part of you was quite relieved that you no longer had to hide your relationship with Suguru around Shoko and Satoru. It felt like a weight had been taken off of your shoulders.
And Suguru? He was the most relieved out of all of them.
And he definitely kissed you a lot that night.
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literaryavenger · 7 months ago
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Obsessed
Summary: Your crush on Bucky may be getting out of control.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader
Warnings: Dramatic Reader. Language. Angst. Fluff. My poor attempts at being Funny.
Word Count: 1.4K I'm physically incapable of making anything short.
A/N: I wrote this in like 2 hours and I don't even know what this is, just... Yeah.
Masterlist
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This is terrible.
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to you.
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone. It's just the most horrible, dreadful, awful thing that could’ve ever happen to yo-
“Would you stop staring at him for fuck's sakes!” Natasha's hissed words make your eyes snap to her and finally away from the metal armed Supersoldier lifting weights. Shirtless.
You don't know when Bucky stopped feeling self-conscious enough to allow him to workout in nothing but a pair of gym shorts, but it has become literal torture for you.
Needless to say, Bucky's current level of undress is making it impossible for you to concentrate on the stretching you're supposed to be doing before your sparring match with Natasha.
But your very thoughtful and not at all exasperated friend makes sure to keep your attention on her during the entirety of our match by thoroughly kicking your ass.
What a lovely best friend you have.
Anyways.
Your entire mood shifts with one not intentionally overheard conversation. Steve enters the gym and goes straight to Bucky, who was putting his weight set down.
“She’s here!” Is all the blonde says to his friend and your heart stops at the way Bucky’s face lights up with a smile, not needing any more information before following Steve out of the gym.
She’s here? Who the fuck is she? Does Bucky have a girlfriend? And most importantly, she’s here? In the Compound?
Natasha can almost see the gears turning in your brain as you make no attempts to move from the mat after she knocked you on your ass for the hundredth time today. You didn’t even seem to notice her hand offering you help to get up, your eyes still looking where Bucky was just a moment ago, staring at nothing in particular while your brain drowns in your overthinking.
Natasha sighs and decides to end the match here, kneeling down in front of you and placing her hands on your shoulders, shaking you gently to snap you out of it.
“Don’t overthink this.” She tells you when she’s sure she has your attention. “It’s probably just a friend visiting.” She tries to comfort you, but you both know that’s highly unlikely. 
Bucky has no other friends outside the team. He doesn’t know how to talk to civilians anymore after everything he’s been through, and gave up trying to after the hundredth time he saw fear in a person’s eyes just by recognizing him. So his friend circle now includes the team and the agents of SHIELD that are not intimidated by him. Point is, every friend he has already lives in the Compound.
So who the fuck is here just to see him? 
Natasha can see that this is a lost battle, your eyes barely concentrating on her as you start drowning in your mind again. All she can do when you’re like this is try to distract you and keep you out of your head. So she takes your hand and helps you up, leading the way to the common room to watch one of your beloved romcoms together, because that’s how much she loves you.
Big mistake.
“Y/N! Y/N!” The excited high-pitched voice came just seconds after you set foot in the common room. And that’s about the only warning you got before the excited 5-year-old jumped on you, your reflexes thankfully quick enough to catch her.
“Hi, Maguna!�� You say while chuckling as the little girl hugs you. “You seem excited today. Did you get into the sugar cabinet again?”
Morgan giggles at your joke and shakes her hand before taking your face in her little hands and dramatically saying, “No! A princess came to visit uncle Bucky! A real princess.”
You frown, confused at what she’s talking about, before you look around the room and finally notice everyone else in it. Pepper and Tony are on the couch, looking at you lovingly as you interact with their daughter.
You love Morgan, she’s like a little sister. You never miss an opportunity to babysit her and you spend as much time with her as you can. She also loves you, out of all the Avengers you’re her favorite, much to everyone’s dismay. She calls them all ‘aunt’ and ‘uncle’, but you’re just Y/N. You’re her big sister, you don’t need a title. Which is why you're the only one other than Tony allowed to call her 'Maguna'.
Then you notice the other people in the room: Steve, Bucky and… Shuri. The fucking Princess of Wakanda, standing in the common room of the Avengers Compound and just smiling at you as you carry Morgan.
You’ve never met Shuri, but you know she played an important part in deprogramming the Winter Soldier out of Bucky, and you’re grateful to her for it. She’s important to Bucky, and you can’t believe you forgot Bucky has Wakandan friends.
You put Morgan down on the ground again and the little girl takes your hand and aggressively steers you towards where Steve, Bucky and Shuri are standing, clearly thrilled to be in the presence of a real life princess.
“Hi, I’m Shuri.” She offers you her hand when you get close enough and you shake it with your free hand while introducing yourself.
There’s a bit of an awkward pause and you’re about to say the first thing that pops into your head when Morgan thankfully saves you by pulling on your hand, making you look at her. She tells you to come close and, chuckling, you kneel beside her so she can whisper conspiratorially in your ear.
“She’s a princess and she’s really pretty, but I still like you better.” She whispers and you can’t help but laugh.
God, you love this little girl.
You smile brightly at her and launch a tickle attack, her adorable giggles filling the room as everyone looks at you two with warm smiles.
Your attention is solely on Morgan, until you unintentionally hear the whispered conversation between Shuri and Bucky.
“So, this is the girl, huh? She’s pretty.” Shuri says and your heart skips a beat. 
You glance at them as discreetly as you can while still tickling Morgan, only to find Bucky looking at someone behind you. You turn around less carefully and see Sharon just entered the room, and she's also looking at Bucky with a smirk. You quickly return your attention to Morgan, but your mind is going a thousand miles a minute.
Of course he’d like someone more like Sharon. She’s pretty, she’s talented, she’s a total badass and she’s not afraid to go after what she wants.
She’s not a mass of anxiety in the shape of a woman that overthinks everything and becomes a flustered mess every time she’s even near Bucky.
It’s time to admit it to yourself: Bucky just doesn’t see you like that and you need to move on. 
Natasha is right, your obsession with Bucky needs to end.
What you don’t see is Bucky almost glaring at Sharon because he knows damn well why she’s smirking. She came in just before Shuri whispered to Bucky, when he was very intent on looking at you with heart eyes as you played with Morgan.
Just before you looked at him, Bucky noticed Sharon and he had to hold in a groan at her because he knows that she’s never gonna let him live this down.
Both Sharon and Steve have tried really hard to convince Bucky that you like him back and he should make a move on you. But Bucky, being as stubborn as they come, never believes them.
He obviously makes you uncomfortable, you’re always stuttering when he’s around and you avoid eye contact whenever possible. He’s just glad that you can stand his presence enough for the two of you to work together when necessary and to hang out with the rest of the team without problems.
So he just enjoys looking at you from a distance. He loves watching you play with Morgan and his thoughts always run wild with images of you playing like that with kids that are yours and his.
But he knows that’s never going to happen. Why would you like a damaged, PTSD ridden soldier that can’t even make it through the night without waking up from a nightmare? No, that’s definitely not your type.
Bucky accepts the truth: He doesn’t deserve you and you don’t see him like that anyways. 
It doesn’t matter that Sam thinks he’s obsessed, that won’t stop him from looking at you whenever he’s lucky enough to get a glimpse of his little ray of sunshine.
Requested taglist: @vicmc624 @matchat3a @nerd-without-a-cause @sapphirebarnes @cjand10 @mostlymarvelgirl @julvrs @blackhawkfanatic @lillianacristina @armystay89 @imdoingbetternow @spookyparadisesheep @elizalexwil @aceofhearts25 @dontworryboutitsweetheartxx-blog @justab-eautifulmess @buggy14 @thedonswife13
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leaawrites · 2 months ago
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Please Please Please (OB3)
Ollie Bearman x fem!reader
Summary: The internet can be a cruel place, especially when no one knows your boyfriend is taken, and rumors seem to be loved by the f1 community.
Warnings: allegations of cheating, cursing, crying, alcohol,
Wordcount: 1.5k
Masterlist, Short n'Sweet Series
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“Holy shit.”
Y/n looked from the dance floor to her friend, who was sitting opposite of the table they were all gathered around in a club way too fancy for a simple night out. She was just filming a video of her other friend, Kasey, dancing with her boyfriend; liking to capture any moment of life possibly.
“What?” Y/n asked, stop recording in case something terrible has happened. You never knew who would see those videos one day.
She watched Lily, the one who spoke first, look up at her, her eyes filled with guilt. A guilt she could see was growing into pity by the second. Y/n furrowed her eyebrows together, looking at the other two around her to find answer in them, but she didn’t. It was all just a single feeling. Pity.
“What happened?” She asked again, fear and panic creeping up her spine.
Lily turned her phone around, showing her the screen in front of her. There was a photo of someone who looked like her boyfriend, dancing with another girl. Tears threatened to leave her eyes, the make up on her face scolding her for crying over something so stupid.
She didn’t even know if it was him
It could just be a friend of his he hadn’t introduced her to yet. (she couldn’t really blame him, he knew her friends barely too. They were only dating for about 3 months now and with his job as a future F1 driver, the media went crazy over him at the moment.)
He promised her, he would always be there for her.
Kasey stumbled over to the table, clutching her boyfriends hand and giggling. The alcohol in her blood rushing her heartbeat to a new high. She bent down, leaving a kiss on Y/n’s cheek, who was still sitting as if she was paralyzed.
Sinking down on the chair next top her, she said, “I saw you filming. Thank you for being the best friend anyone could wish for. Ollie’s really lucky to have you.” Her voice still boomed over the others, but the music was a bit quieter than on the dance floor. They all heard her, loud and clear.
Y/n started picking at her nails at the mention of his name, the phone still in her hands. Looking down on it, she felt a tear slip past her eye and down on the screen. His profile facing her, not looking at her. He was looking at her. The girl he was so close with. It couldn’t be him. It couldn’t. He would never do something like this, right? He would never hurt her like this. This wasn’t him. It couldn’t be.
“What’s wrong, love?” Kasey asked, sensing the strange behavior of her friend. Y/n’s body collapsed into her arms, tears streaming down her face. She put the phone on the table, clear for everyone to see.
Please, please, please, don’t let it be him.
“That motherfucker,” Kasey cursed him, watching the screen, sobering up rather quickly now that the anger flooded her veins instead. “Who does he think he is? A red bull driver? No, he’s with Haas.”
Lily took her phone back, dialing his number, ready to call in case Y/n wanted to. Kasey rubbed the girl’s arm in comfort, looking at her boyfriend to tell him to get the car ready outside the club. She wanted to go home, so much was clear.
“It’s probably just his British nicety shining through,” Lily tried to make him seem innocent. She knew how shitty it was, but she also knew that the internet lied about most things. Y/n didn’t know the truth, she shouldn’t be too quick to assume anything.
The group was hesitant about Ollie from the beginning, wanting to protect Y/n from future heartbreak or problems like these. The internet and how people felt bigger through it. Putting their opinion higher than anyone else’s, because there no one truly knew them. They knew she would get hate for dating him, they knew he had the ability to make her feel like the most worthless person to ever exist. But she loved him and so they watched the tale unfold with suspicion.
“You wanna go home?” Kasey cooed, making the girl nod and wipe her eyes.
With her head low, she walked as quick as she could, avoiding the crowd like she was a fallen soldier. Holding back the evidence of failing in fear of seeming weak.
Ollie made sure they were staying between them, not showing her off to the public and seemingly being single to the fans, just in case they would ruin what they had. As it seems, he could do it all by himself.
" I need to talk to him,” she mumbled as the stumbled out of the club, holding on to Lily’s hand in fear of tripping in her state. The girl only handed her her phone, the number already ready.
Excusing herself to a more secluded place, Y/n walked over to the other side of the small parking lot beneath a street light so that they could still see her. Kasey explained to her boyfriend what she was doing.
Y/n took a deep breath before exhaling and waiting for a second until her voice seemed stable enough to talk to him. It rang three times before he finally picked up. The music in the background fading as he answered and walked further away to hear her more clearly.
“Lily?” he asked.
Right, she thought, it wasn’t her phone.
“Is everything alright? Is Y/n okay?” he continued asking, sounding slightly panicked.
“I’m fine,” the girl answered.
“Y/n?” Ollie asked, surprised to hear his girlfriend’s voice on the other side of the line. “What is going on? Do you need my help? Did your phone die again?”
“No, uhm, I actually wanted to talk to you about something,” she said, her voice wavering and eventually breaking.
“Hold up, let me get out of here so I can listen to you properly.” Y/n waited, legs trembling, while the music was completely gone after a door closed on Ollie’s side. “What is it? Did you cry? You sound like it. Did you hurt yourself or anything?”
“If you don’t want me, you should say it before I fall even more for you, you know?” She said, tears falling again.
“What?” Ollie was shocked. She imagined his eyebrows creasing together, his eyes filling with panic, his heartbeat picking up. She wanted him to hurt when she did too. It were his own actions in the end after all. “I don’t understand what you mean? Not wanting you? How could you even say something like that? Of course I want you.”
“Do you also want her?” It was now or never, and if she had to get the truth out of him, she might as well make it quick.
“What? Who?” he asked again. Confused. Trying to wrap his head around where she got the feeling from that they weren’t serious.
“The girl in the photos from tonight?” she continued talking. “I saw them, OK? You don’t have to lie anymore. Please, Ollie, please tell me the truth. Please.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said honestly.
“Lily showed me photos of you in the club tonight with a girl. You seemed cozy. Close.” She bit her lip from crying even more. Now that the words left her mouth, they felt more real too. More threatening.
“What did she look like? What did I look like?” He had to make sure she trusted him and that was by showing her that whatever she saw, wasn’t real.
“You looked normal?” she said, confused as to what he wanted the answers for. “White shirt, brown hair. I don’t know, Ollie, I don’t know what she looked like, I couldn’t look at her.” She started sobbing again, hand over her mouth to stifle the pathetic sounds coming from her. “I just couldn’t have it be real. I couldn’t.”
“It’s not,” he said, assuring her. His heart broke at the mere thought of hurting her. Hiding her was his way of protecting her, but maybe it wasn’t the best way to do it. Maybe that only made it worse. “What you saw, it was not real. I know what you’re talking about, I know about the pictures. Arthur showed them to me a few seconds before you called. I wanted to call you, I really did. You were just the first one to do so.”
“It wasn’t you?” she asked to make sure. A burden falling from her heart at the relief of not losing him like this.
“It’s not me,” he said. After a moment of silence he added, “I’ll pick you up, okay? We’ll get home and talk about everything, alright?”
“Yes.” she nodded even though he couldn’t see her. Smiling at the knowing of the truth. “I love you, Ollie.”
“I love you too.”
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totalswag · 8 months ago
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unfold — RAFE CAMERON
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authors note sorry for not posting as much with fics, life got a little to serious for a moment. huge thank you for 600+ followers you guys are absolutely amazing ugh. this idea came in mind randomly one day and rafe little unfolding with his enemy is...
summary you have been rafe camerons shit list for a long time now. what happens when you attend a party at tannyhill and somehow make Rafe cameron fold
warnings mentions of smoking, drinking, cussing, partying
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Rafe Cameron, kook king, as people would say.
He’s one of the most popular people in outer banks. Just hearing his name sends shivers down people's spines. He has girls practically on their knees for him left and right. There’s something about him that captivates them.
But, you don't want to mess with him either. You don’t want to be on his bad side. When he walks into a room, everyone stops and looks at him with fear or wondering what he's gonna do. He loves the fact that he has that effect on others. It helps boost his ego.
Rafe Cameron, on the other hand, has had you on his shitlist for a long time. You enjoy antagonizing and teasing him. You enjoy seeing him furious when you do things that irritate him. People warn you, but you dismiss them since he never does anything about it. He’s never and will never do anything in ways to hurt you physically. 
Rafe’s throwing a party at his house tonight. Of course he didn’t invite you. He knows you’ll show up regardless because that's how you are. Word spreads quickly on the island.
"Y/N, I didn't expect to see you here?" stated one of your close friends, Hailey, smiles as she hugged you.
You initially stated that you would not attend a party because you were not in the mood to do anything this weekend other than sit at home and watch movies. However, once you found that Rafe was throwing a party and happened to live down the road from you, you had no choice but to come and make your presence known. 
“Oh well you know me, gotta make my presence known” you chuckle, taking a sip of your drink, scanning the room.
“If you wanna find Rafe, I’m pretty sure he’s somewhere in the living room or doing coke out back with the guys” Hailey whispers in your ear, winking.
Hailey is very well aware that you enjoy annoying the crap out of the Cameron boy. She claims it's for her own entertainment. She's waiting for you two to crack because she knows you are into each other but won't confess it.
"Let's go on the dance floor?" You insist as you take her hand in yours and walk her past the crowd to the living room.
The two of you start dancing to the beat of the music. A few people you recognize from school come up, catching you off by surprise. You girls end up dancing with each other for half of the night alongside the crowd.
“I’m gonna head to the bathroom real quick” you whisper in her ear. 
“Okay, be safe” she replies back, squeezing your hand before you start walking away.
You bump into a muscular body on your way to the bathroom, and you look up to Rafe, who is already glaring down at you with a stern expression, as if he's about to argue about the fact that you're at his party. You can sense the tension in his body building. You like it.
A smile forms on your lips, and your pointer finger grips and plays with his chain, "looks like someone isn't happy to see me, huh?" You sarcastically remark, waiting for him to snatch your hand away from his chain.
"My night was going great before I bumped into you, Y/N," he replies with a harsh tone with a slight hint sarcastic, rolling his eyes. 
"Aw, are you not excited to see me?" you cynically pout.
Rafe is trying so hard to go off like he usually does with you. You know how to get under his skin unlike anyone else. He hates that you have that effect on him that just snaps.
"You really don't want to start it with me right now, Y/N," he says harshly and sternly. Looking in his eyes, you can see he's had coke and drank.
"Oh, but I really want to start, Rafe," you remark as you move closer, chests meeting.
You couldn’t help but feel the sexual tension growing between the both of you. This is the first time you are feeling it. You’ve always wondered why he never did anything about your behavior towards him. Actually, no one doesn’t know why, only Rafe does. 
Hailey stood a few feet away, watching the whole thing unfold. She had to remove herself from the large crowd of people around her to watch her best friend.
Before Rafe can respond, Kelce walks up to tell Rafe to go in the backyard because there’s something he needs to show him.
"Oh, hey Y/N, it's good to see you and looking beautiful as always" Kelce smiles giving you a warm hug.
"It's to see you too Kelce and thank you" you reply while pulling away from the hug.
“Nice seeing you Rafe” you wave innocently, smiling, then flipping him off with a straight face.
You both know you’ll run into each other again tonight.
When you make your way back to Hailey, she’s laughing over the interaction she watched. You tell her to shut it before she says anything else. You drag her down the hall into the bathroom to pee and talk about what happened.
“I love seeing you do that to him” Hailey laughs, taking a sip of her drink, jumping on the bathroom sink.
In answer, you grin, lifting your finger and moving it back and forth, "The way he was ready to go off on me but cut off when Kelce told him to go in the backyard made me wanna laugh in his face."
After the bathroom, you both headed into the kitchen to get another drink from the coolers. The kitchen was occupied with people getting drinks or simply standing and talking.
Hailey began talking to this guy she'd been eyeing for a while. 
You lean in to whisper in her ear, "I'm gonna let you be, call or text me if you need anything," and she smiles back, reassuring you she’ll be okay.
You scan the room, unsure of what or who you're looking for. Something inside you tells you to go find Rafe and annoy the living shit out of him. Topper and Kelce noticed you examining the room from afar and approached you. 
The two wave as they approach you, you wave back smiling.
“Hello boys” you smile, “enjoying the party?” you ask, taking a sip of your drink.
The last time you saw Kelce he was drunk but not drunk enough. Now here he is half an hour later crossed.
“Fuck yeah, we are crossed” Kelce chuckles, throwing his head back.
Topper agrees with a nod.
“Oh, I can tell,” you reply.
Topper turns around when he sees Rafe making his way over. The two boys take a step back, revealing you. Rafe stops his tracks, rolling his eyes, tongue runs over his bottom lip, annoyed.
Perfect timing to annoy him.
The two boys let out a chuckle, shaking their heads from the look on Rafe’s furious look. 
Something leads you to take Rafe's hand and lead him to the large crowd. You follow your gut and approach him gently. You gaze up to him, who is already staring at you with such intensity that it sends shivers down your spine. You grab his hand in yours and bring him towards the large crowd in the living room.
Topper and Kelce’s jaws dropped when they watched Rafe follow you into the crowd. For one, Rafe never does that with you, ever. They give each other the look of you just saw that too look.
"Please tell me Rafe just let her do that?" Topper blurts with confusion spread all over his face.
Kelce rubbed his eye to make sure he was seeing the same thing as Topper.
When you come to stop, turn around and face him. You can tell he's irritated that you dragged him to the center of the dance floor. But you're wondering why he let you do it.
"Why did you lead me here, Y/N?" Rafe questions.
"I wanna dance, Rafe, and you are gonna dance with me," you chuckle, grabbing both Rafe's hands and resting them on your waist while maintaining eye contact with him.
He shrugs his shoulders, turns your body around, making you gasp, catching you off guard. Now your back is against his front. 
You tilt your head back, swaying your hips to the rhythm of the music while his hands rest themselves on your waist.
As you continue to dance to the music, Rafe leans down to your ear, “you are playing a dangerous game with me, Y/N” the thrill in your blood went through the roof by his comment.
With a smirk, you close your eyes and place your left hand on the back of his neck, drawing his head down so you could whisper in his ear. The sound of his steady breathing may be felt against your skin.
"What kind of game are you implying?" you asked, touching the ends of his hair behind his head.
"C'mon, you can't tell me you haven't been enjoying this, Y/N? You know what I mean," he says, knowing what he means as he’s directing both hands from your waist to the center of your stomach and back to your waist, attempting to catch you off guard, but you refuse to let it happen.
You know that he knows you love annoying the shit out of him but he can tell by the way your body reacts to his touch that has him a little intrigued.
In reaction, you back yourself into his front, drawing a sigh from his lips before spinning around, stepping on your tiptoes and putting your arms around his neck.
You feel something hard pressing against your stomach. In that moment you knew where the night was gonna take you both.
You two make eye contact.
You notice his eyes looking at your lips then your eyes, going back and forth.
“If you’re gonna look at my lips you should just kiss them” you remark with sass which didn’t make him quite happy but you didn’t care.
He leans closer, and your faces get inches closer and closer. At this time, both of your breaths are increasing, but no one is moving. You lean forward and extend the tip of your tongue, allowing it to touch Rafe's upper lip.
Rafe's demeanor shifted, which concerned you a little because you'd seen how aggressive he can be but he'd never hurt you. He grabs your wrist and brings you through the enormous home and upstairs to his bedroom, which is down a hallway and out of hearing. 
As you passed past people, they were taken aback to find you holding hands with Rafe Cameron as you walked the stairs. You can imagine the amount of discussion and publishing on social media.
"You never know when to shut up and take a hint, little one," he says with his back to you, locking his bedroom door before turning around backing you up against the edge of his bed.
"I actually do know when to shut up, mister," you respond, still standing firm. 
Rafe catches you off guard by pushing you onto his bed, opening your legs so he can stand between them, and smoothly moving his hands up and down your thighs. 
"Oh, do you, Princess? Let's see how that goes while you're screaming my name beneath me.”
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soobnny · 4 months ago
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dating him | lee know
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❝ come over, the cats miss you ❞
chan | LEE KNOW | changbin | hyunjin | han | felix | seungmin | jeongin
if he wasn’t a menace before (impossible btw), he sure as hell is now
this man is relentless
teasing as his love language
just loves riling you up bc he thinks ur reactions are so cute
and he smirks a lot too
if he wasn’t so damn attractive, u would’ve wiped that smirk off his face !!!!!
“wait min, i got a text”
“nice to know you have friends”
u hate him 😭😭😭😭😭
he’s such a little shit that he’s even rilling u up during ur dates
like
laser tag games where he kisses you to distract you before taking you out
HE’S SO MEAN
he’d push you against the wall with a sly smirk and you think you won’t fall for it again, but you do
every single time
u should’ve known better
this is lee “resident cheater in all possible games” minho
anyways
he is also an ass lover ❤️❤️❤️
i’m sorry but u cannot go into a relationship with him without expecting him to always have his hand on ur ass in some way
so in short
the trope is giving u thought he was out of ur league but he’s actually a weirdo
so now u’re dating the Weird Kid
(u wouldn’t want it any other way)
his other love language is acts of service
i said in my chan one that minho also gives Chief Hong from hometown cha3
like tell me i’m wrong
man wife #2
he is ur personal handyman
he’s just good at everything
will most probably only do it for u tho
seungmin: hyung can u fix my sink
minho: no
seungmin catching strays 😂😂
you: babe—
minho: what do you need me to do now
he says it in fake annoyance too
but he’s got his tools in his hand already ready to do whatever u want
obsessed i tell u
he drives u around too
if you have an event, a party, a project, anywhere you need to be
he’ll drive u there
he always makes time
AND he picks you up too like shut up
it could be a party that finishes at 2am and he’s just waiting for your call to pick you up
sometimes, you tell him he can just sleep early bc your friend will give you a ride home
when you get home, look … he’s still awake
he’s been waiting for you to come home this whole time to make sure you’re safe
BUT he doesn’t say anything
the moment he sees you’re alive and breathing (and doesn’t need taking care of), he’s on his way to the bedroom to sleep
when u look around, he’s done the chores already
he just does things to lessen the load that u might have u know
if u’re so stressed with anything, he’d silently clean up ur room or bring u food
so u don’t have to think about that anymore
also the best chef in town btw
he likes cooking together
and by cooking together i mean like he does all the work and u just stay there and keep him company
he can’t risk ur clumsy ass injuring urself
comforts u thru his cooking too
would baby u and feed u when u’re sad
his favorite dates with u are quiet, homemade dinners
just likes being with u and u only
away from everyone else
as niki would say, i don’t like anyone except sometimes you
it’s in moments like those that he just unwinds and shows u his softer sides
he’s honestly just so gentle and soft
he looks at u with stars in his eyes
ugh such an attentive listener too
sometimes u think he isn’t listening, but he’s got it all memorized
“yeah u mentioned it on our date 3 months ago”
like damn
anyways, moving on
his pet names for u give olden times
honey, darling, jagi
but also loser, idiot, stupid girl (endearingly)
so u two are giving me old married couple
u’d both wake up early and have coffee or tea together and just talk abt anything
also this is far into the future but like
sneak peek at minho as ur husband
i think u two would be the type to have a garden
like gardening would be ur little hobby
he grows fruits and vegetables
u beg to grow flowers
OK BACK TO BOYFRIEND MINHO
randomly sending selfies thru the day
THOSE selfies
u know what i’m talking abt
forces u to send selfies back
(ur photos are all saved and hidden in his phone but he will never tell u that)
oh u’ve also become his cats’ mom btw
one of ur favorite errands to do is going grocery shopping for his cats
u’d always end up buying them a gift
“u’re the reason my cats are spoiled”
SUUUUUUURE minho suuuuuuure
cat fashion shows
like dress to IMPRESS
(btw idk why but i feel like u could force him to play roblox with u)
he also uses his cats to lure u to visit him btw
“soonie misses u, u’re being a bad mother”
it’s just him who misses u let’s be real
and if ur favorite thing to do with him is cat shopping, his is walking by the han river with you
he loves walking
esp when it’s with you
just a peaceful walk tbh like yall don’t even have to say anything
tho sometimes when he’s feeling playful, he’d suddenly play tag with you
ends with both of u just sitting by the river and looking at the lights and the stars and holding hands or maybe ur head on his shoulder
damn wish that were me fr
when u go home, u watch some variant of a trashy reality tv show together
u’ve basically seen it all
but if anyone were to ask u what happened in those shows, yall wouldn’t know
u two were too busy just making out instead of paying attention
or falling asleep
old married couple i’m telling u
expect to also be dragged into his camping
when he has particularly long days off, he’d propose going camping together
ah, the beauty of warm bonfires and quiet conversations
he’d take good care of you the whole time
like yessss do your job as a man and fix up this entire camping site
and he does
tho, aside from camping, he’d also suggest hiking to take in the view of the mountains and the pretty sky
u’d wake up early on both occasions just to watch the sun rise
in contrast to these very productive activities, sometimes minho also just loves lazy sundays where you just cuddle for the entirety of the day
what more could he want
u and his cats with him
that’s honestly just the dream
good luck cat mom
have fun acting like an old married couple with lee know
he is the dream man
nonchalant to anyone else except u
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note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy
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lionhanie · 5 months ago
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leehan as your boyfriend! ♡
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established relationship, PURE fluff, leehan x reader, leehan is IN LOVE with you, also not proofread LOL!!!!!!!
word count: ~800 i think lol
warnings: none
a/n: i can't lie this whole thing was sooo self indulgent i just love him so bad #GUILTY!
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literally does everything in his power to make you smile and feel good... #1 boyfriend in the world i fear!
he must have the ability to read the minds of the people he loves bc he just knows what you need all the time
...or rather than this, all of his opinions and preferences become whatever you like! (without complaint ofc, because he’s okay with anything as long as you’re satisfied)
this makes me think he’s rlly big on quality time because he seems like the type of bf to be content with just. whatever! as long as you’re there ^_^
quite literally only has eyes for you
he doesn’t really *intend* to do this, but it is so difficult for him to focus on anyone else if he has *you* there with him
everyone will always complain when they hangout with just you two bc they will always end up feeling like a third wheel :skull: 
even if you try to tease him for literally adoring you 24/7 he wouldn’t even be flustered or embarrassed. he would just nod and smile in agreeance U_U
he’ll always go out of his way to compliment you too, telling you how cute you look or how good you are at doing something. he gets a little shy every time you compliment him, but he always recovers by turning the praise back to you
even though he isn’t the best texter, i imagine he would put in extra effort to keep you updated throughout the day-- especially if it's hard to spend a lot of time together in person
you're just going about your day at school/work and you hear a notification on your phone... it's leehan sending you like 10 different angles of the new friends he got for his fish tank
or it's one of his selfies that are either 1) blurry, 2) crop out like 80% of his face, 3) at an unnatural selfie angle, or 4) all of the above. regardless, he's still your handsome boyfriend & looks amazing in every pic he sends
unironically i think he would be a DRY texter LMFAO but the way he communicates is kind of endearing. rather than sending messages, he def has a concerningly large album of reaction pics he uses for every possible situation (including ones he made himself using pics of you & the members)
dates with him are SO fun.
again, he doesn't really care too much about what you two do as long as he gets to spend time together... he's just down to try Anything and Everything so you guys never really run out of things to do together
being so eager to try new activities, i can 100% see him suggesting the most obscure data ideas & being so genuinely excited to do it no matter how odd it may seem given the context
cause Boy wdym you think fishing in a river at 12am is a fun idea for a date... it’s not necessarily like you were going to say no .... but also… this isn’t a common date activity, right?
i think he loves staying in with you the most….. sleepover!!! :3
especially after you both had tiring days; spending a night in with each other never fails to recharge you both!
ordering any food you want (he isn’t planning on eating much, so he’d rather get something you’re craving) ((after a couple bites he sits back and watches you eat w/ the biggest grin on his face))
but i think the absolute BEST part of the night is when the two of you are side by side at the bathroom counter doing a Twelve Step Skincare Routine that leehan made himself
and you’re giggling the whole time bc he takes his skincare SERIOUSLY. (that one mf who don’t play about his skincare bye)
i think he’d be super attentive, but silently though
you’d never know he’s constantly keeping track of your reactions to certain things, your different routines, your food preferences, the types of clothes you like
Ok in theory it /sounds/ creepy but he just puts in the effort to observe the way you like to do things so he can help you whenever you need it
IMAGINE you’re running late & you can’t find your phone /again/ and you’re lowkey freaking out because you Need To Leave Now but leehan just steadies you and hands you your phone
and ur kind of in awe ??? i've been looking for this for ten minutes now... How Do you have this …?
he just shrugs and explains “you always leave it underneath the blanket when you make the bed so i figured it might be there again" and motions for you to hurry before you’re late
or maybe you’re feeling under the weather & you ask him to make you a hot drink to help soothe your throat and he comes back with a mug of tea made EXACTLY how you make it for yourself
you're pleasantly surprised upon taking your first sip because …you don’t recall ever telling him how you like your tea? 
then he's sitting there with stars in his eyes and saying “i made it properly, right? :3” (clearly very proud of himself bc he remembered how you like it)
doesn't seem like the type to be too extra when it comes to PDA. if anything, he prefers small and/or secret interactions in public (it feels more intimate if only you guys know what's happening)
head pats. that’s it. he thinks the way you literally melt whenever he pats your head is the most endearing thing ever, so he'll save it /specifically/ when you're out w/ a group of people because he loves seeing you so flustered afterwards
keeping a hand on the small of your back or resting his arm on the back of your chair when you're sitting next to each other
holding your hand in his under the table, giving it a gentle squeeze as the two of you continue to talk with the others at the table
at the end of the day... he just loves you so dearly & couldn't be happier knowing that he can call you his, and you can call him yours :,)
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© lionhanie 2024 ; all rights reserved!
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racecardilfs · 5 months ago
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aegean - fa14 smau
fernando alonso x fem!singer!reader
summary: fernando alonso and his girlfriend break up, but is it really over?
warnings: angst no fluff! some slut shaming moments, fernando does NOT look good in this one, but theres more going on behind the scenes i promise xx
a/n: this has no specific face claim, and the songs mentioned are from a variety of artists! there will be a list at the end of the post ♡ there is a part two to this all planned out, it will be posted shortly, hopefully!
my masterlist ❀ part two
Twitter
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yourusername: NO YOU!!
alexandrasainmleux: pretty pretty girl!!
yourusername: can’t wait for another date with you gorgeous 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 charles_leclerc: excuse me? yourusername: you’re excused, vroom vroom boy 😒
user1: gorgeous gorgeous girls have breakup parties together
yourusername: you know it!!! user2: CONFIRMATION? IM DEVASTATED. RUINED. WALKING INTO THE OCEAN.
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Liked by f1, astonmartinf1, and 375,599 others
fernandoalo_official Greece, you were beautiful🤩A few days off before it’s back to the track again! 🏎️
User3: Sir, I don’t know what you did, but you better fix it right the fuck now.
User4: how do you know it was his fault? we don't know anything yet User3: bc that woman is literally a saint, there’s no way it was her fault User5: don’t get me wrong, i love y/n so much, but there’s no way for us to know what happened. it might not have been anyones fault, and neither of them need this energy if they’re trying to get over their breakup :’( i’m rooting for both of them
Hater1: Always knew she was bad for you, congrats man!
astonmartinf1: see you soon, sir!
Twitter
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Instagram
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Liked by yourbsf1, charles_leclerc, maisiehpeters, and 264,978 others
yourusername been a little busy lately, but i’ve got something cooking for you all!
yourbsf2: love you so big <3
yourusername: i love you the biggest! 💓
alexandrasaintmleux: can’t wait for everyone else to hear it!!
user6: PLEASE TELL US WHAT YOU KNOW!!!! 🙏 alexandrasaintmleux: 🤫
user 7: oh… this is gonna wreck me, isnt it.
lilymhe: yeah… you’ll thank her though
user8: the last photo 💔 i promise it gets easier, y/n
Liked by yourusername
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Liked by finneas, coltonherta, yukitsunoda0511, and 516,785 others
yourusername remember when i said i had something cooking? my album ‘aegean’ is out now. a lot of love and hurt went into this album, and now it’s yours. i hope it means as much to you as it does to me <333
finneas: it was such a blast to work with you on this album, lets do it again soon!!
yourusername: yes please!
francisca.cgomes: so proud of you babe, just lmk when you want to run away and elope!
yourusername: my bags are packed and waiting! pierregasly: guess i’ll just leave you both to it 🧍
yourbsf2: wow look at how cool and pretty and talented my best friend is, everyone!!!
yourusername: ugh i love you so much
alexandrasaintmleux: still so excited!!! can we please go get late night ice cream to celebrate
yourbsf1: seconded francisca.cgomes: thirded! yourusername: ok to the groupchat before this is a long chain xx alexandrasaintmleux: as you wish, babe 👩‍❤️‍👩
user8: oh my god???? surprise drop???? queen behavior
user9: i’m not crying, YOU’RE crying!
user10: ur crying too, dont lie! user9: ok yeah. have you HEARD aegean? how could i not be screaming crying throwing up.
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Liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, yourbsf1, and 228,531 others
lilymhe this amazing, beautiful girl did something amazing and beautiful again! y/n, i am so so proud of everything you’ve accomplished. please never let the hurt keep you down, because you are absolutely incredible. We will always be there to pick you back up if you need it! midnight ice creams with you are something i will cherish forever 🫶
tagged: yourusername, yourbsf1, your bsf2, alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes, maisiehpeters
yourusername: i love you sooo much lily <33333 thank you for being such an incredible friend
lilymhe: i love you forever 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
francisca.cgomes: pretty best friends stick together forever and ever
yourusername: men are temporary, girlfriends are forever
maisiehpeters: might need to move to monaco so i can come to every midnight ice cream from now on
lilymhe: you’re welcome every time!
user11: how do i get this kind of female friendship in my life? 🥺
yourusername: be kind, be yourself, and be open! your people will find you, user11 💕 user11: OMG HI QUEEN ILYSM KEEP BEING YOU!!! thank you so much!
Twitter
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Fernando Alonso's Instagram messages
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a/n: and that's my first fic! first smau too, so i hope the formatting isn't too bad? i love when reader is friends w the wags, but i also always love to have y/n have friends outside of the paddock, so i hope no one minded! sorry if any of the wags are ooc i just rlly needed a big group of girl friends for this and idk how normal people talk. also was this just propaganda for some of my fav songs/artists? maybe 🤭i'm actually super nervous about this, so i hope you all enjoyed!!! please send me any questions or comments you have!
the songs mentioned are:
While You Were Sleeping - Laufey
Black Hole - boygenius
Lovesick - Laufey
Goddess - Laufey
Wendy - Maisie Peters
anything - Adrianne Lenker
opposite - Sabrina Carpenter
Aegean - Push Baby
Mud - Delaney Bailey
things i wish you said - Sabrina Carpenter
(I Would Have Followed You) - Delaney Bailey
475 notes · View notes
princessbrunette · 5 months ago
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john b had these big firm hands.
not because you’d been studying them or anything, you just very quickly learnt this about him when you’d joined the group — the way the other pogues would complain about aches and knots in their back only to have it quickly resolved by the brunette. with the little crush you’d developed on him, you’d find yourself complaining more and more about your own pains — perhaps when on your period or after a long day, and he’d be happy to help you. that’s what he did, he was a problem solver.
what you failed to realise is how much john b enjoyed it too.
in a general sense, sure. like mentioned, he liked to help people and fix everyone’s problems for them— and being such an active group, it was often physical pains causing them strife. whether it would be a knuckle in popes calf or an elbow in jj’s shoulder, they were appreciative.
“you should be like, studying to do this for a living bro. you got a gift.” the blonde would comment after john b had cracked his shoulder, to which the brunette would shrug it off with a—
“yeah, like i can afford that.”
you don’t realise, but soon enough the routledge boy starts to pay a little more attention to you specifically, and no one knows or cares why enough to comment on it. he’d started to ask, instead of waiting for you to complain about it. asking ‘does this hurt? does this hurt?’ as he moves you in different positions because he thought you looked ‘a little stiff’ that day.
you liked it. you liked holding his attention. john b was the leader, somehow the main character in everyone’s life— so you revelled in the attention he’d give you whilst playing the group chiropractor. it made you feel special when he singled you out.
he seemed to have this belief, that you were way more tense than anyone else in the group. he’d hooked his fingers into the idea that because you happened to have anxiety, your body would too suffer. this might’ve been true, maybe you were more tense than everyone and it showed— probably naturally less comfortable around the group seeing as you were the newest addition, but the likelihood was that john b had only convinced you and everyone else of this because he just adored getting his hands on you.
he likes the way your skin feels soft compared to the callous palms and nicked fingertips of his own. he likes the way the fat of your flesh moulds and succumbs to his touch. he likes the way he’s developed enough natural strength over the years to manoeuvre you any which way he wanted, his own warm little rag doll for the time being that sent his imagination running rampant when he’d put you in more vulnerable positions. he loved the way your brows would furrow when he’d crack the right spot or dig his hands in the right place at the right pressure. the way your lips would part with a little whimper when there’s an audible crack.
his voice was what made it enjoyable for you a lot of the time. not that it didn’t feel great, but john b had a ‘talk you through it’ kind of voice. warm, kind, comforting, rumbles in your ear when he’s slotted up behind you, performing his magic until you click somewhere you didn’t think you could.
“how we feeling? hm?” he’d ask, and you could hear the casual smile in his tone without looking, a face that you didn’t have to look at with your eyes to know it was there because you’d seen it so many times.
his cock would always twitch when you’d respond. the prettiest, whiny tone when you were especially relaxed and off guard, a tone that even had jj’s ears perking up from across the room occasionally. “feels so good, john b.” now you didn’t have to say his name, too.
he told himself it was normal to feel that way about a friend as long as there was a boundary. you were pretty, and soft— he’d be a fool not to find that attractive. what he did feel guilty about, was the indulgence. it wasn’t gentlemanly of him, something he prided himself on being. he couldn’t let anyone know he’d continue the fantasy later on, replaying your satisfied mewls in his brain like a broken record, the sounds morphing and twisting, moulding like clay in the hands of his imagination as he attempts to twist it into sounds of sex. he can still feel the heat of your skin beneath his hands through his minds eye, but this time he’d be pushing your lower back down to make you arch as you take his dick deeper.
he recalls the squishiness of your thighs that one time he worked the knots out, and this time uses the memory to fuel the thought of pushing your thighs up against you whilst nuzzling his nose against your clit and lapping up the juices you’d leaked from him rubbing on your body prior. he hears it again, “feels so good, john b.” but this time your head is thrown back, your tits are spilling from that little bra that peeks from your shirts, your clits throbbing against his tongue.
he makes a mess on his fist each night he thinks about it, and wonders how often he can get away with touching you up under the guise of a massage.
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lookingfxryou · 5 months ago
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Flustered
Notes: A series of small snippets exploring Giyuu and reader’s idiots to lovers relationship <3
prev - next
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
“I could just stare at you forever.”
“Creep.” Came Giyuu’s reply to your flirtation which only made you sigh dramatically.
“Come on! That was a good one! Didn’t you feel your heart skip a beat?” You weren’t one to back down so easily though.
You had befriended the Water Hashira after much efforts and stubbornness from your side, until the poor man had finally relented and did you the honor of replying to your questions.
Lately though, much to Giyuu’s annoyance, you had started flirting with him. (I’m not flirting with you! I’m just trying to make you blush. Don’t think so highly of yourself.”)
And he would rather die before admitting that your one liners, indeed, had some kind of effect on him. You couldn’t really tell though, with the way he always gave you a deadpan expression and a scathing retort. God, he hoped you did not know, he wouldn’t be able to live with himself.
(Why does he think that, though?)
“The only thing I felt was wanting to reach home faster.”
You pouted and walked a few steps ahead of him, turning back to look at him and walking backwards.
“One of these days, I’ll make you blush so hard that you’ll have a nosebleed.”
That unwillingly pulled out a smile from him which had you beaming. Now that he looked at you, you were really beautiful. Sure you were one of the strongest slayers and had prevailed against a lot of deadly opponents, but there was something about your smile, the way it had your eyes crinkling, that gave him pause. Made him think of you in a totally different way.
Shaking his head, your conversation stopped as you reached his house. You wasted no time in going ahead and calling out for Tanjiro and Nezuko.
(What even were they doing in his home, he had no clue anymore. Something about being in the most quiet and inconspicuous place. As if there was anything inconspicuous about those two.)
“Don’t you have to go home?” He called out making his way inside and you stopped before furrowing your brows at him.
“Don’t steal my babies from me.”
He just sighed and went ahead to his room. God, you were infuriating, had no sense of personal space, kept talking to him–
“Did he come around then?” He could hear Tanjiro’s voice, dull since they were probably farther from his private quarters, but his nonetheless.
He could hear your giggles.
“You are too optimistic, Tanjiro. He still thinks I’m just trying to make him blush.”
A pause.
“Which is true, I suppose, but he doesn’t really take my words seriously.”
“Why don’t you just tell him that you like him?”
Giyuu felt his breath hitch at Tanjiro’s words. There was no way that you liked him. The antisocial, rude, idiotic him.
“And risk him completely shutting down on me, and everyone else? No, I can be patient. Besides I got him to smile today!”
He could hear Tanjiro’s exclamations but his heart was beating so fast that he couldn’t even think properly. Did you really–? But you could choose anyone else–? Why him?
Your voice turned lower, more serious and Giyuu had to strain his ears to hear your next words.
“He’s one of the kindest people I know, Tanjiro. And maybe he doesn’t see it himself but I do. I see the way he is with strangers, helping silently, not asking for anything. I see him with you and Nezuko and how much he cares, even if he doesn’t show it. He deserves so much more and I hope he will get it someday. Until then, I’ll be his friend and stay by his side.”
This was not happening, no, no, no. He could feel it, his skin getting clammy, heart beating fast and the heating of his face.
You thought this much about him?
Your conversation turned to other topics after that and Giyuu moved away to go outside where the cool air caressed his warm, blushing cheeks.
You would never let him live it down if you saw him like this.
Well, since you came all this way to his home, he supposed it was only natural to ask you to have lunch together.
Along with Tanjiro and Nezuko, of course!
Just a normal lunch with friends.
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munsonkitten · 1 year ago
Text
It starts small.
Steve buys Eddie a handful of cassettes after the whole Upside Down business. Drops them unceremoniously in Eddie’s lap while Eddie’s laid up in the hospital. Eddie pulls them all out of the plastic bag and lays them out in his lap while Steve stands a few feet away, arms crossed protectively over his torn up middle.
“I got things on your vest,” Steve says as Eddie takes in the titles. “I figured everything in your room’s probably gone now, but I still have your vest, and I’ll — I’ll give it back. When you get out of here. It’s safe in my room. But, just — yeah, the tapes are things you have on it.”
Dio’s The Last in Line, Motorhead’s Ace of Spades, Metallica’s Ride the Lightning, Judas Priest’s Screaming for Vengeance, and WASP’s self-titled album.
“I almost bought you more, but I wasn’t sure what else, and I don’t know much about your music, so I just got those. I was going to bring you my Walkman, but I couldn’t find it,” Steve says. “I think one of the kids borrowed it and never gave it back, actually.”
Eddie still hasn’t said anything yet. He’s still taking in the gift in his lap, can’t even comprehend that Steve wanted to give him more.
“Uh,” Eddie says, trying to get his brain working again. “Yeah. Man. Fuck, dude. Thanks. Seriously. Don’t worry about the Walkman, really. This is nice, Harrington.”
“Yeah, no problem, Munson,” Steve says softly. He goes and sits in one of the chairs in Eddie’s hospital room, and stays there until the kids come running from Max’s overcrowded room to ask for a ride home.
Eddie lays there with his tapes spread out over his lap, and he finds himself smiling down at them. He doesn’t even have anything to listen to them on, but he thinks it might be the most thoughtful gift he’s ever gotten from anyone other than Wayne.
It’s nice, he thinks, that he might be becoming friends with Steve Harrington. It’s nice, he thinks, that even when they’re no longer fighting for their lives, Steve might want to stick around.
He didn’t expect that.
Eddie’s in the hospital for two weeks, and Steve stops by almost every day. He sits for a while, sometimes they talk, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes Eddie wakes up and sees Steve sleeping in one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs. He doesn’t wake him, just smiles to himself because Steve’s tired, but he doesn’t want Eddie to be alone.
It’s been a while since Eddie’s had a friend the same age as him. Jeff and Grant are both two years younger than him, Gareth is four years, and Henderson, Wheeler, and Sinclair are all five or six years younger. He has friends, but Steve feels different, just a few months younger but already graduated. In a way, it makes Eddie feel younger, still being in high school and all.
He doesn’t really think that should matter, but it kind of does. All his younger friends look up to him, he’s always the one making plans and making sure everyone sticks to them, he’s the one in charge of it all — the older one. But when Steve’s around — Steve, with his real job, and high school diploma, and his nice car, and the brood of children he chases after, Steve, who’s an adult in all the ways Eddie himself feels like he’s not — Eddie feels like he can sit back and let someone else do all of that.
When Steve’s around, it feels like he has someone to care for him and look out for him the way he’s done for the others.
It starts to ease everything he’s carried for so long.
* * *
The next time Steve buys something for Eddie, it’s even smaller.
In fact, it’s so small that Eddie doesn’t even notice it at first because Steve was actually really sneaky about it. Eddie would almost find it cute, if he were allowed to think about Steve that way. He’s not, to be clear. It goes against his Munson Doctrine to have crushes on the jocks, rich kids, and straight boys, of which Steve is all three, but if he wasn’t, then yeah, Eddie would find it cute that Steve is sneaking him tiny gifts when he isn’t looking.
There’s a keychain on his van keys that he certainly didn’t get for himself. He notices it one day during a get together at Harrington’s house. Eddie just got out of the hospital a few days ago, and everyone insisted on throwing a party. Now kids are running around Steve’s backyard, yelling and hollering and trying not to fall in the freezing cold pool. It’s still too early in the spring to swim.
Even Max, barely out of the hospital herself, is being wheeled around in her wheelchair by nothing more than El’s mind powers.
It’s kind of fucking insane, to be honest.
But Eddie needs to go out to his car to get his pain meds because he’s really starting to feel the length of the day in his aching joints and healing wounds, so he grabs his keys off Steve’s counter where he left them, and that’s when he sees it.
A tiny metal bat dangling from his keys.
He knows it was Steve because Steve was the only one in the house when he got here and set his stuff down in the kitchen, and no one else has gone inside since Eddie found his way to the backyard, so of course it was Steve.
Eddie doesn’t mention it, just smiles to himself and runs his fingers over the pointed wings.
He sees Steve looking at him when he comes back into the kitchen. Eddie raises his hand and shakes his pill bottle at him, and without another word, Steve goes to the cupboard to get a glass that he fills with water.
Eddie sets his keys back down on the kitchen counter as Steve slides the glass of water over to him. Steve nods at the keys, and Eddie grins at him.
“Thank you,” Eddie says.
“I have a matching one,” Steve says, turning back toward the sink to look out the window above it. “Just, you know, because…”
He gestures at his torso, and then over at Eddie, and Eddie nods. He gets it.
It makes him feel a little bit closer to Steve. Even if Eddie isn’t allowed to crush on him, he’s happy to have someone who gets him. Who understands what he went through, and feels similar pain.
It’s like Steve’s saying You’re with me now, we’re connected, and you’re not getting rid of me.
Read on AO3
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nagichi-boop · 2 years ago
Text
SHADOW IS WRITTEN SO WELL IN THE MURDER OF SONIC THE HEDGEHOG!!
First of all, just him showing up to Amy’s party is a step up from his recent “I will do everything myself, I hate everyone, imma fight you” attitude that we have seen. Secondly, and idk if it was intentional, but him attending shows he cares about Amy. He’s always had a special place for her after the events of SA2, so it’s nice to see him showing up for something that maybe isn’t his style for her sake. (Parties aren’t really his thing, after all.)
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT
It’s also really sweet of him to go through so many lengths to try and get Amy’s present. I definitely don’t think he forgot to get her a present, he genuinely just didn’t seem to know that it was a social norm to bring presents to a birthday. If he really didn’t care, he either wouldn’t have gotten her anything or he would’ve given her a rushed gift. But no, he went through a lot of effort, basically foregoing the game, just to stall Amy so he could get her a present she would enjoy.
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And not just any present - he remembered her mentioning a specific band she liked and that she hadn’t seen them live. This not only suggests he listens to her and remembers what she tells him, but also implies that he has had multiple conversations with her. Clearly he must have also done some research too since he knew that the tickets were going live soon. He thought this through, even if it was a bit last minute, and did his best to get the tickets (even though he admits to not being the best with computers, which is also nice because usually Shadow just insists he’s the best at everything). I also think it was sweet that he didn’t heavily protest Amy’s suggestion to see the band together. He hesitated, but then yielded. This…for a character who recently has been written to be quite selfish.
He seemed upset that he couldn’t keep this a surprise, but he also didn’t become enraged or lash out at Tails and MC/Barry. In fact, he didn’t really lash out at anyone at any point which is refreshing, since in most Sonic media that’s his go-to emotion.
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Most of his expressions throughout the game are fairly gentle in fact. Sure, he doesn’t smile, but he also isn’t actively angry. And the one expression where he does seem a bit negative just seems like his resting expression, or at absolute worse just a little annoyed. He’s very mellow throughout the game and it’s refreshing.
Even after he has finished talking to Amy, Tails and MC/Barry, he offers to stay with them and help them with the investigation. Normally in Sonic media, Shadow has no interest in helping others and only really cooperates if there’s a mutual goal/interest. And even then, he tends try to do things on his own. But in this game? He actually cooperates, and what’s more, he goes out of his way to offer his help.
So far I’ve mostly talked about his attitude towards Amy. But what’s his attitude towards Sonic? People debate back and forth on whether Shadow hates Sonic and the recent games and media have made it seem like he does hate Sonic. But in this game? I wouldn’t say so. I mean, he’s literally hanging out with him and his friends and instead of having beef with Sonic, he just focused on making Amy happy. And even when the situation gets more dire and Sonic is found to be knocked out, he doesn’t make any snarky comments or anything. In fact, he actually helps to tend to Sonic’s condition, even if it was just checking his pulse. If he rly didn’t care, he would’ve left it to everyone else.
Man, I could talk for hours about Shadow in this game. I can’t believe this April Fools prank game is actually the best characterisation for Shadow we’ve had recently. He’s not overly aggressive, he isn’t selfish, he isn’t super edgy. He is still sorta cold, but he’s not rude or mean. He’s actually really kind (in his own way), putting his needs and desires on hold to make Amy’s birthday fun and to help everyone out. I seriously hope that Shadow is written more like this in the future and not like he has been. Maybe Sega wasn’t joking about taking on board the complaints of the fandom.
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lovebugism · 2 years ago
Note
Virgin!Eddie thoughts?
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THE CUSTOMER'S ALWAYS RIGHT | quid pro quo
summary: eddie muson is a virgin and doesn't want anyone to know (because being an adult who's never fucked anyone is a total reputation ruiner). but you, his favorite customer, are more than willing to change that. pairing: eddie munson / f!reader word count: 6.5k (holy shit this was supposed to be a blurb) warnings: talks of virginity and masturbation, the word "tit" too many times, a handjob (sorta?) 18+ mdni a/n: you asked for thoughts but i had way too many of them for a single post so i might turn this into a whole virgin!eddie series that will only see the light of day if you guys are into this so... no pressure &lt;3
( MASTERLIST ) | ( NEXT )
You were Eddie’s favorite customer, though that went without saying. It was something both of you were more than aware of. Albeit it, it was a little strange, since he — the supplier of your weed — was essentially paying for your high. He doesn’t mind it, though. He never did. You made it up for him in other ways; and, no, it’s not as perverted as it sounds.
It’s actually much, much weirder.
It was your fourth time meeting with him but your first time without any money to give him in exchange. You’re all pink and fidgeting and feeling like a total loser as you shift on the hard wooden bench across from him.
Your gaze is tilted away from his and down at your hands where you twist the rings on your fingers — “I was supposed to get paid last Friday, but my boss is paying me weekly now instead of every two weeks, so he completely changed my payday on me, and he swears he told me about it, but he totally didn’t— anyway, that’s beside the point. I don’t have any money to give you, or like, at all. Genuinely. I’m gonna be lucky if I get to eat anything other than top ramen for the next few days.”
“Damn,” he laughs, not in amusement at your situation but rather pitying you for it. “That sucks—”
“That sounds like I’m guilt-tripping you, doesn’t it?” you keep rambling. “I’m really not. I’m just trying to be honest. I’m not, like, trying to do you over or anything. I swear. You probably don’t even care. You’re my drug dealer, not my friend, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't— I’m making a total fool out of myself, aren’t I?”
“No, not at all,” Eddie assures sincerely, the hint of a smile curling at the corner of his lips. That’s all he can muster. He feels like the fool right about now because your words sting a little harder than intended. 
He always considered you a friend. Or, at least, a whole lot more than just a client. You’re the only customer he has fun with, who he can laugh with, who doesn’t just hang around long enough for him to hand you your drugs like everyone else does, who actually cares enough to make conversation with him.  
Maybe that’s why he chose to give it to you for free that day. 
Because he’s started to grow fond of you (and because he genuinely believes that you’re in a bad way and that money’s a little too tight for you right now. He knows all too well what that’s like.) 
But he asks you for a favor in return when you take the plastic baggie from him. It has him blushing with embarrassment like you’d been just minutes before. He can’t meet your gaze as he says the words, but he can feel the incredulous beam of it piercing holes into him.
“You, Eddie Munson, are willing to give me weed, for free, as long as I… help you pass your next English exam?”
You weren’t repeating it to mock him or to make him feel bad for being a third-year senior. You’re just actually shocked because you know a thing or two about the Munson’s. You know that his Uncle is working two jobs, and his nephew has resorted to drug dealing to compensate for their being strapped for cash. You also know that suppliers giving out anything for free is bad for business, so it’s essentially unheard of. 
And aside from all that, Eddie wanting to study — to want to try to be good at something rather than just winging it and hoping for the best — was almost as surprising as him wanting you to be the one to help him. You literally have Gareth, his best friend, in your English class, and he’s way better at it than you are.
You try to find what makes you somehow special but come up short.
“Is that, like, really weird?” he wonders meekly, scrunching his nose and peering at you through his lashes. His eyes are the color of chocolate syrup, you notice then. Like, exactly. And they have a sort of sheen to them beneath the sun, like he's trapped a star inside of them.
“Yes,” you answer with a laugh that's as light as air. “Considering you could’ve offered literally anything else. Like, I don’t know— groping my tits or something.”
It’s what you were half-expecting. Not because you thought Eddie was that kind of guy, but because that’s how it often went down, at least in porn. A busty (broke) blonde orders a pizza, a man with an enormous dick delivers it… It’s a tale as old as time, really.
Your words make him tense for the second time in five minutes. 
He almost wants to be offended that you’d think of him that way, but his yearning far overpowers his wounded ego.
He’s got a soft heart. That offer never would’ve crossed his mind, and even if it did, he’d never be stupid enough to say it out loud. But he didn’t realize how much he liked you until right then. It wasn’t just a friend caring for another friend, but a boy with a crush on a girl eons out of his league (with boobs he would happily touch if she’d let him).
He clears his throat and irrationally prays that you aren’t a mind reader.
“I’m down if you are,” he answers with a playful lilt to his voice that makes you giggle again. He’s happy to hear it. Your laugh is like being basked in sunshine. He wants to keep it in his pocket when he gets lost in the shade. 
That’s the moment that started it all — the strange friendship that formed out of practically nothing. Who knew what being poor, free weed, an historically low GPA, and a missed opportunity for tit-groping could do to two people?
From then on, all your weed was free. As long as you broke down all the themes in Of Mice and Men for him, of course. And then, when he ultimately aced that paper, he wanted to run his D&D campaign by you — “So, you know, it isn’t totally lame when I show it to the rest of Hellfire.”
“Of course, it’s gonna be lame,” you deadpan from across the rotting bench. “It’s Dungeons and Dragons.”
He goes red at that, a flash of pink blotched around his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. He glows cherry with embarrassment and smiles faintly as he looks down at his hand, fidgeting with his silver skull ring. It’s cute. Too cute. The kind of cute that makes you grin to yourself without even thinking about it.
“I’m kidding, Eds—”
Eds. That was new, the boy remarks to himself. Not the nickname itself, perhaps, but the fact that you were the one calling him by it. You’re getting more comfortable with him. He likes that. It gives him a false hope; that one day he’ll be a friend to you and not just your dealer.
“—It sounds really fun actually,” you assure him with nod and a twinkling gaze that proves you sincere. “As long as you’ll smoke with me during.”
“I don’t really like to use my own product…” That was a lie. Mostly. He didn’t like to smoke his own stuff because that burned a hole into his profits. But that didn’t mean he didn’t do it. It was far too tempting to have a tin full of so much weed never more than just a few inches away.
Now he’s got a pretty girl in front of him, wanting to smoke with him, wanting to spend time with him. Hell’s freezing over as they speak and that certainly calls for a celebratory smoke session.
A smirk pulls at his pink lips and he tilts his head, bringing his ear to his shoulder, as he looks at you with a glimmering umber gaze.
“But I’m willing to make an exception. Just for you.”
Eddie swears you blush at that, but he catches only the shortest glimpse of your crimson cheeks before you duck your gaze to the table. The beam on your face is only half-washed away, however, when you turn up to look at him again. You look shy, almost, as you peer at him through your lashes.
“You’ll basically have to start from scratch too, you know that, right? I don’t know anything about that shit.”
“Well, I’m glad I can be your first,” he quips.
You laugh again. It’s like the pinky-orange of a sunset. He could paint it if he had the right supplies. And a set of hands that were good for things other than rolling die and playing guitar.
It was his first time, really. In every aspect of the phrase.
It was the first time a girl’s ever offered to hang out with him and not the other way around. The first time a customer’s ever offered to share their weed with him. The first time someone’s ever wanted him to explain his favorite hobby and not care that he’s been rambling for the better part of an hour. 
He doesn’t even notice that he hasn’t shut up since he started talking, mostly because you aren’t giving him that look of annoyance people usually have when he hasn’t gotten the hint. Most couldn’t care less about goblins and villains and battles and knights and princesses — princess knights.
It’s more interesting than you ever hoped a board game could be, but less so as enchanting as the glow Eddie’s got about him as he rambles on and on about something that makes him so happy.
He’s beaming and he doesn’t even realize it. He has no idea he could light up an entire solar system with the smile on his face. You’d tell him if it didn’t feel totally inappropriate.
It takes two weeks to perfect the campaign, which isn’t at all long if you compare it to the year it took him to build it from scratch. When the Cult of Vecna (you pat yourself on the back for coming up with the name) is polished and Hellfire worthy, Eddie starts giving you weed... just because.
There’s nothing left for him to offer in exchange. And he isn’t going to turn his favorite customer down for anything.
“What? No tutoring? No D&D campaign?” you wonder with furrowed brows and a face contorted in confusion.
Eddie shrugs and swings the baggie full of greenery back and forth with the tip of his pointed finger. “Nope. I’m passing English and the campaign’s all finished — the guys love it, by the way. Thanks to you. You’ve helped me out with enough shit, so… just take it.”
“Well, now I just feel bad,” you reject with a scrunched nose, displeased at the idea of taking something and not doing anything for it in return. He can hardly afford it to begin with, much less without anything in exchange. “You're basically paying for my weed already. I can’t just take it.”
“You could,” the boy lilts with a sardonic nod. “My hand's getting a little tired here, sweetheart.”
You huff and reach across the bench for the plastic baggie. Your face is still twisted with an absentminded annoyance and your gaze still uncertain. “You sure it’s okay?”
“Yeah. Cross my heart.”
“Fine.”
“Unless groping your tits is still on the table, of course,” he squints playfully over at you and then smiles softly at the recollection of the conversation from many moons ago.
It was supposed to be a joke. But you’re not laughing.
And when you nod at him, he isn’t either.
It’s got him nearly choking on air and sputtering for a response. “No, I was— I was just— It was a joke. I was just kidding.”
“I know. But, I don’t know, I’m down if you are,” you shrug. “That’s what you said before, right?”
And Eddie has no idea what to say to that. Of course, he wants to. There are a billion things he wants to do. He wants to graduate, he wants to play a show at the Madison Square Garden with Corroded Coffin, he wants to bend you over this table and fuck you silly.
He could do all those things if he were a different person, but he wasn’t. He’s just some guy who can’t pass an English class he's already taken three times, with a mediocre band that plays in front of about five drunks (if they’re lucky), who has a crush on a girl who’s offering to let him feel her up for a short-lived high. 
He repeats that last part to himself in his head a couple times. It sounds like a dream he had once. He pinches the skin of his wrist, just to make sure, and winces when it starts to hurt.
It’s real, you’re real, and that’s the scariest part. 
Because he’s never actually seen boobs that weren’t projected from a television screen through the grainy film of a VHS tape, or pictured in a crinkled magazine he stole from a gas station — let alone touched one. And the second he puts his hands on you, and you feel him shaking like a leaf and totally unsure of what to do, you’ll know that. 
That is, if he doesn’t come in his pants first.
He’s terrified that when you do realize that he’s a complete and utter, absolute and proper virgin, you’ll think he’s significantly less cool. And he can’t have that.
It’s bad for clientele. They’ll stop seeing him as the mysterious metalhead from the wrong side of the tracks but rather as some teddy bear who’s never actually been inside a woman.
He could probably handle the potential drop in income and the talks around school. Hell, he could even handle all the shit Jason Carver would spew at him if he knew. But the idea that you’ll stop wanting to hang out with him — he isn’t sure if he could take that.
He doesn’t notice that he hasn’t said a word until you’re speaking again. And even then, it’s all muffled like he’s underwater. 
“I can come over tonight, if you want.”
No, he thinks to himself. That’s far too early. I have to lose my virginity and learn everything there is to possibly know about sex first.
“I... I can’t. Hellfire,” he answers, almost slurring, still caught in a stupor.
“Tomorrow, then,” you challenge at his rejection. You cross your arms and lean over the table as you squint at him. The wind rustling through the trees carries the warmth of your floral-vanilla scent over to him, like a lullaby, or a magic spell.
As though he needed something else to make him all stupid.
Suddenly you're ten feet tall. Eddie feels like an ant. You could crush him if you wanted. You have all the power and the look you give him tells him that you know that. He fidgets on the hard wooden seat but can’t seem to break your stare. His voice is tight and a few octaves higher as he answers — “Yeah. Tomorrow sounds good. Great, even.”
“Cool,” you’re suddenly beaming. You stand from the bench and saunter off, tossing a look and a wave over your shoulder as you shout, “See you tomorrow, Eds!”
He has to jerk off after that one. He counts himself lucky that he made it to his van before he exploded completely.
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Eddie has to become a sex god in twenty-four hours and he doesn’t know where to start. 
So, like any master procrastinator, he doesn’t. He just worries about it all night and the following day. He turns himself into a big ball of anxiety (if you touched him, he'd probably shock you) and it’s left him in the sort of worry that doesn’t let him sit still for too long.
Wayne’s sitting in his recliner, trying to eat his late lunch before he heads off to work the graveyard shift. It’s hard to enjoy his sandwich or the latest episode of Miami Vice playing on the television ahead of him when his nephew keeps bouncing in and out of the room. Making brief conversation, rearranging the knickknacks on the coffee table, coming in just to stand in place for a few minutes before leaving again to rustle in other parts of the small trailer. 
At one point, he comes in with the fucking vacuum and nudges at the man’s work boots until he kicks his feet up. Wayne’s never seen him do a chore in his life.
“What the hell has gotten into you today, boy?” the man complains through turkey, cheese, and bread.
“Nothing. What are you talking about? I’m perfectly normal.”
He’s never been normal a day in his life either.
Eddie disappears out of the room a second later with the whirring of the vacuum in tow. Wayne shakes his head to himself. “Boy’s gonna be the death of me,” he mumbles and takes another too large bite.
It’s unlike Eddie not to tell his uncle things, especially things weighing so heavy on his chest that they're starting to feel like pure steel. But his uncle doesn’t ask any questions, and Eddie’s grateful.
How the hell is he supposed to tell Wayne that a cute girl is coming over and that he’s jacked off three times at the thought of her?
Once in his bed, the first thing he did that day when he woke up from a dream about you that felt a little too real; the second in the shower when the cold water wouldn’t kill the boner he’d gotten; and the third in his bedroom, in the shirt he’d peeled off hardly ten minutes beforehand when he got into a bath. It made him feel dirty again though his skin was perfectly clean.
Wayne would think he was joking. At least with the “cute girl” part. He’d probably pat him on the back for the second one — “oh, to be young again,” he'd mumble to himself while simultaneously deciding to leave well enough alone.
Eddie’s so nervous he doesn’t know what to do with himself. 
You’ve got him practicing what to do in the mirror, trying to plan the conversation, ironing out the wrinkles of what might happen. “Hi—” he starts but then shakes his head and clears his throat. His voice is deeper as he continues, “Hey, how are you doing? Oh, that’s cool, I’m good too— shit, this is so fucking lame.”
He wonders how you’ll go about it. If you’ll offer first, or if he needs to ask. If you’ll make small talk or if you’ll just straight up take off your shirt. He’d take either, honestly.
He jerks off one more time, just for good measure, after Wayne’s left for work. He’s already tired and his dick is practically raw with how much it’s been tugged at, but he hopes it’ll stop him from getting hard the second you walk through the door. And he figures with the amount he’s come that day, he’s a whole less likely to do it in his pants when he touches you.
You knock on the door at 7 o’clock sharp, like you planned it down to the minute.
He straightens out his leather jacket when he stands abruptly from the couch. He rushes to the door and then hesitates with his hand on the rusted brass handle — because he doesn’t want to seem too eager, right? 
He leans to the side to look in the dirty glass mirror hanging by the coat rack, brushing through his curly locks in attempts to tame them. Then he shakes his head so they’re wild again.
He finds you standing on his porch in a tight-black sweater that dips down at your chest; the pendant of your necklace sparkles under the yellow nightlight perched on the outside wall. It’s paired with a white nylon skirt that stops at your thigh.
He’s only seen girls on TV in the suede boots you’re wearing — the kind that’s tight up to your ankle with a short and chunky heel. They match the color of your skirt. He wonders if they were expensive and how much you’ve worn them; they look brand new, like you’ve brought them down from the top of your closet just for him.
You’ve got a stack of thick tapes in one hand and a brown paper bag of snacks in the other.
“What… What’s all this?” he wonders, not displeased at your effort but shocked by it nonetheless.
“Thought we could have a movie night,” you shrug then slide by him and into the trailer. He shuts the door behind you and watches from afar as you set the sack down. It’s not quite flat on the bottom so it topples over and spills some of its content onto the coffee table — red hot chips and sour gummy worms.
“You mentioned that you’d never seen Fast Times a couple weeks ago, so I decided to go rent a copy at Family Video, right? And then I started talking to Robin and she started showing me all the new movies that just came in, so I got a little carried away—”
You're rambling, he notices, almost like you’re nervous.
It makes him feel slightly better, knowing this obviously wasn’t your first time hanging out with a guy (or being touched by one, if he ever got to that part), but that you were nervous nonetheless. Like you wanted this — whatever this was — to go well just as much as he did.
Eddie puts the tape into the VHS player when you’re headed back from the kitchen with a bowl of popcorn in hand. You sit it on the table before plopping yourself in the middle of the couch — the boy across the living room has no idea you spent the two-and-a-half minutes it took to cook the snack debating on where to sit.
You feared sitting too far on one side might spook him from sitting next to you, that he’d think you didn’t want to sit next to him. So you place yourself snuggly in the middle of the decade-old sofa and hope you don’t seem too eager.
Your heart sinks to your ass when Eddie sits so far on the edge he’s practically sitting on the arm of it.
You muster a smile and try to make a joke of it. “I don’t have cooties or anything, Eds.”
“Promise?” he lilts. The way his voice shakes is purely for comedic effect. Obviously.
“Cross my heart.”
He hopes that by playing it off, you won’t notice how anxious he is about sitting next to you. But when he plants himself beside you, just close enough so that the rough fabric of his jeans scratches your knee every time he fidgets, it’s a little like sitting next to a rock. You spend the first half of the movie wondering if he’s nervous too or if he really just didn’t want to sit this close to you.
The film keeps playing and he keeps snacking — eating chips and Oreos and popcorn in a rotation before combining all three and marveling at the taste; “You’ve got to try this!” he exclaims to you with raised brows and wide eyes. He eventually forgets to be nervous.
That is, until Fast Times hits 53 minutes and 5 seconds.
The smooth bass of Moving in Stereo plays lowly in the background as Phoebe Cates rises from the pool water, clad in a small red bikini. The chlorine-laced drops of water glisten off of her tanned skin. “Hi, Brad. You know how cute I always thought you were,” you quote quietly along with her.
Your eyes are as glued to the television as Eddie’s when she starts to unlatch her top, like it’s the first time you’re seeing it too. You joked to Robin once that you couldn't wait until they made this movie in 3D.
Eddie gets hard as a rock, then. In every sense of the phrase.
“She’s hot, right?” you ask him.
“Yeah,” he answers. He clears his throat when the word comes out too tight. “Totally.”
“That’s how I knew Robin was gay, you know? We watched this when I slept over at her house one time and I woke up in the middle of the night and found her playing this scene over and over again,” you confess with a laugh and hope your best friend won’t be too angry you told him this. “She was sitting, like, two inches away from the screen.”
“Really?”
“Mhm. And when we made out afterward, that really sealed the deal—”
“Holy shit—” he sputters before he can stop it. “—Are you joking?”
Please, say yes before I come in my jeans, he thinks to himself.
“Why?” you challenge, shooting him an arched brow over your shoulder. “Does that change anything?”
“What? No! Of— Of course not!” It just makes you, like, ten times fucking hotter, that’s all.
“Good,” you nod and then turn back to the television. You move on quickly, and Eddie’s grateful. You keep telling the story like it’s one you tell all your friends.
“I asked her why she was watching it without me, and she said she got bored, but I already knew why she was watching it, you know? I guess I just wanted to hear her say it. So I just came out with it — ‘If you want to look at a pair of tits, I’m literally right here.’”
Eddie’s so entranced by your words it’s like you're telling him a bedtime story. He’s looking at you so intently, his gaze locked to your profile like he’s trying to commit it to memory. And when you finally turn to look at him again, he can’t seem to turn away, to even pretend like he wasn’t just hopelessly staring at you.
“So, then it became this whole thing, right? Like, I’ll show mine if you show yours. And then she got all awkward and nervous and lost in her head, kinda like you right now, and then I leaned in…” you trail off quietly, doing it in time as the words leave your mouth. So teasingly and breathtakingly slow. Eddie finds himself drifting closer to you, too, like a bayman to a siren’s call. “Just like this… And then I—”
You don’t have a chance to finish your sentence.
Eddie’s already kissing you before he realizes what he’s doing. Your noses knock together, the tip of his crushed against the side of yours. The sweet flavor of your strawberry chapstick evades his mouth when your lips press together.
He’s as shocked as you are.
He’s wanted to kiss many pretty girls in his life, but this was the first time he's actually ever done it.
You feel his face burn red against you when he realizes what he’s just done. He tries to pull away from you, but you keep him there with a hand on the back of his head; deepening the kiss and telling him that you want this — that you’ve always wanted this — without actually saying the words.
Refusing to separate from him, you maneuver yourself to face him more as press yourself against his side and tuck your knees beneath you. You caress the rough pad of his tongue with yours all the while, one hand balled in the shoulder of his t-shirt and the other anchoring itself to his curls.
You wait patiently for him to take action. To grip your waist. To lay you back on the couch. To climb over you and take what’s his.
He never does.
He hardly even touches you. He’s got one palm on your hip, but it’s so featherlight that it’s barely even there. His other hand is clutching the pillow on his lap with a white-knuckled grip, like he’s fighting to contain himself in some way. But you want him to let go. To lose himself with you.
The cushion had been there for most of the movie, something to keep in his absentminded hold and get crumbs all over. You wonder, now, if it’s a shield for something else.
Your lips click wetly when you part from him. A small smile forms on your mouth when you notice a string of spit threatening to connect the both of you. It breaks apart, landing cold below your mouth, and you wipe it away with the back of your hand.
“Are you hard?”’ you wonder through bated breaths, coming right and just saying it.
Eddie’s eyes go somehow wider and his mouth falls agape. “Uh… No?”
Giggling, you ask, “Is that a question?”
“Maybe.”
“So what’s the answer?” you pry.
“Honestly?” he starts with a heavy breath and heavier eyes, still trying to joke. “Whatever makes me sound super cool and mysterious and sexy.”
“I’ve always thought you were all those things,” you confess with a soft laugh, twisting a strand of his hair with the tip of your finger.
“…Really?” he can’t help but wonder. Those words are about the most shocking thing that’s happened so far this evening.
“Yeah,” you nod, then tease: “Because you've never lied to me.”
So tell me the truth, he can hear the words jumbling around in your head. So does. He swallows thickly and then admits, voice cracking halfway through his confession, “I’m so hard that it fucking hurts, sweetheart.”
You’re smiling like the Chesire Cat at that, big and sly and mischievous. You have all the power and you know it.
“Can I make you feel better?” you whisper to him, lilting like you're taunting him. You mean it, though, and he knows that because you’re already tugging at the pillow in his lap. You don’t fight to snatch it away completely. You leave just enough room to allow him to say no. But his grip on the thing relaxes and allows you to slide the cushion slowly from his crotch.
He can’t say the words because his tongue is suddenly heavy in his mouth and his throat is closing on him. So he just nods, peering at you with eyes hooded with ecstasy.
You go back to kissing him, then, unhurriedly this time. You allow yourself to feel all of him, to hold his face in your hands and explore all the bits of him you never got the chance to before now. You do it more so in an effort to get him to relax, to forget to be nervous, but it only half-works.
He gets more comfortable with himself with time. The hand on your waist finds a more confident purchase there and the other climbs up to your face, cradling your jaw while his ringed fingers get lost in the strands of your hair. Then he starts to kiss you back harder, more earnestly than before, like he’s trying to prove something. Trying to tell you everything like this than with words he can’t seem to say out loud.
He forgets to be nervous again when your lips fit together like pieces of a puzzle — the kind with the funky edges, the kind you know goes together because there’s only two in the whole bunch like it. He stops worrying if he’s doing it right.
His breath is warm and heavy as it fans against your cupid’s bow. He’d rather take in small pieces of oxygen like this than stop kissing you now. You feel the same way as you straddle his thigh, careful not to move with too much haste that it knocks your lips apart.
Eddie’s legs part for you on instinct. When you settle more comfortably against him, he can feel the warmth radiating between your thighs through the thick fabric of his jeans. He wishes he was naked right now, more so that you were, so he can feel all of you, bare against his skin.
But he takes what he can get for now. And tries not to burst completely at the thought that the only thing separating you from him was the thin layer of your cotton underwear.
It’s hard not to think about your own pleasure like this. You could so easily move your hips against his thigh, let the rugged fabric of his jeans and your panties do all the work against your clit and bring you to a swift release. You want to. You’re sure Eddie would want you to if you asked him. But it strangely seems less important now.
Because you know you’re minutes away from making Eddie come so hard his legs shake. And you always wanted to know what he looked like when he came.
Your hand worms out of his hair and down his neck. Your fingernails trail lightly over his skin, leaving visible chill bumps in their wake. Your palm falls down his chest and stomach, smooth like drops of summer rain. The print of his Def Leppard tee is rough and cracked with age. You wonder how long he’s had it, how often he’s worn it, as your hand settles again. This time on his belt.
For a split second, he’s anxious about you seeing his dick. What if you think it’s too small? He thinks to himself. What if you think it’s too ugly? But then he realizes you’re not even trying to take off his jeans. You just rest your palm over the rough material of the denim and grip him through it.
A groan crawls up his throat and out of his mouth. His head falls backward and lands against the back of the couch.
He’s bigger than you thought, and warm against the tender skin of your hand, even through his boxers and his pants. It’d be ever warmer if you were feeling the real thing, you discern, but you figure you’ll save that for another time. Because even though it’s not the real thing and there are so many layers separating your fingers from his cock, Eddie’s letting out small and breathy moans that tell you that you’re touching him just right. The more you squeeze, the louder he gets.
“Is this okay?” you whisper to him.
“Are you kidding?” he retorts with a breathless laugh. “I feel like I’m in heaven right now.”
“Just wait until you come,” you giggle. It makes him moan again. His eyes fall shut because he knows he’s moments away from feeling what it’s like — not to come, obviously, but for it to be from your hand and not his. 
You massage him through his jeans, feeling him grow somehow harder with each caress of your fingers. Peering down at him, you can see his jaw clenching, the way it moves his temples, and the muscles in his neck straining as he climbs the peak of pleasure.
“If you think this feels good now, just wait until you're inside me,” you purr to him.
“Oh, fuck,” he drawls shakily at your words. He doesn’t know if you’re being serious or not. He wants so much to believe that it’s a promise, though. The idea that he could unbuckle his belt right now, free his cock from its restraints and slip your panties to the side and take you, just like this, with you on top of him and riding him for all he’s worth, that nearly does him in.
But he’s fighting to keep it at bay. To let this moment last as long as he can. Because it’s entirely likely that he’ll come and you’ll never want to do this again. It’s even more likely that he’ll wake up from this way too vivid fantasy he’s concocted in his brain. How good can dreams get until they’re nightmares again?
The hand on your hip darts to wrap around your wrist.
“What’s wrong?” you ask him, gaze sober and sincere.
Eddie breathes out a tremble sigh of relief when you slow your motions against him. “I just…” he breathes heavily. And swallows. “I really don’t want to come in my jeans.”
You’re smiling again at that, pleased at how good you're making him feel. Like the pleasure is foreign to him. He can feel your grin as you lean down to kiss him. It’s a chaste peck, like you're just sprinkling yourself there so it can linger the rest of the night. 
Your kiss is far more fervent against his neck, wetter and more passionate. His skin has a faint taste of salt, like he’d been sweating. And he was, for the entire day that he anticipated your arrival, though there was never an ounce of him expecting this. You bite at the strained tendon and marvel as he shudders beneath you.
“It’s okay,” you leave your promise against his skin. “I’ll wash them for you after. Like a good little housewife—”
It was a joke and he knows it because you’re laughing at the absurdity of your words, at the reality of them. You’re probably the only person in the world giving your drug dealer a handjob for free weed and then offering to wash his damp bottoms when he comes in them — calling yourself his fucking housewife. But, for a reason he can’t explain, that’s what gets him.
Not marrying you, perhaps, but the idea that he could have this feeling forever. That you could bring him to complete and utter, blinding bliss and then take care of him while he comes back to earth. 
You give him an especially tough squeeze that sends a moan spilling roughly from his throat. His hips jerk up to their own according, his thigh jamming into your clothed pussy — he swears he hears you moan — and his toes curl in his boots.
He doesn’t let go of your hand as he comes. He grasps your wrist and presses you further against him. His grip is almost too tight but you don’t mind it, not when you can feel the denim growing damp with the evidence of his orgasm.
Eddie doesn’t feel anything for a while after that. It’s just pure pleasure for several long moments. The fuzziness of his climax, your hand pressed against him, your warmth still pressed against his thigh.
But then the high fades away like a rolling summer cloud and he starts to feel the wet patch forming in his clothes. The fabric of his thin boxer starts to stick to him and he almost feels gross, like he’s a teenager again who can’t so much as look at a woman with needing to come.
But then he sees the way you look at him, grinning like a cat who got the cream — because, in some ways, you are. You look like you're proud of him. Like you’re secretly wondering how many times you can do that before it’s too much. He wants to find out too.
You plant another kiss to his lips. Just because you can.
“Take your pants off, Munson,” you mumble against his mouth, kissing him one more time for good measure before pulling away again.
“Oh— shit— wait, really?” he sputters. “I thought you were joking about— about me being… I— I don’t know if I have any condoms.”
He totally does, in an unopened box under his bed, collecting dust. 
You don’t need to know that, though.
“I meant for washing them so you can change,” you laugh at his embarrassment. The sound somehow makes him feel better even though you’re slightly making fun of him. You shrug and arch a brow at him, lilting, “But… I’m down if you are.”
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have any more virgin!eddie thoughts? or just thoughts about my writing/requests in general? leave them here if you want! ꒰◍ᐡᐤᐡ◍꒱
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in-another-april · 7 months ago
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hey carmen!!
i love your writing so so much:(( the way you characterize Spencer is so sweetie pie:((
Do you mind giving us some sweetie pie spencer bestie to lover content!! this is a suuperr niche request so no pressure obvie!!
i love love this request thank u so much!!! let me know if you want me to change anything, i hope u enjoy <3
Before you get together, there is going to be so much mutual pining. Spencer is a mixture of insecure and clueless, he really cannot tell that you're trying to hit on him. Even when he can, he dismisses it as him just taking it the wrong way, because surely someone as perfect and wonderful as you wouldn't like him like that, right?
Literally everyone except for the two of you can tell you're in love, he is so not subtle!! You're the first person he looks for in a room, he practically sprints to sit next to you before anyone else can, and he gets so, so pouty whenever someone else tries to flirt with you. One time you come into work complaining about forgetting your jacket at home and he jumps out of his chair insisting, "You can borrow mine!!"
And, yeah, he doesn't get any work done that day, too busy blushing and staring at you in his clothes.  You conveniently "forget" to give it back, and he conveniently "forgets" to ask.
You're always looking for an excuse to be near each other, to touch each other: You fall asleep on his shoulder on the jet, he rests his head against yours. He takes your hand when he notices you seem stressed, you affectionately brush your thumb along the back of his hand. One of you goes in for a hug, the other holds on just long enough to be considered more than friendly...
And you are both still so oblivious!! No matter how many times you go to look at him and find he's already staring at you. No matter how many times you’re both reading/looking at something for a case and he leans in way closer than necessary to see it. (“Spencer, don’t you have your own copy?” “…I… seem to have misplaced it.”) Neither of you ever confront these obvious feelings.
Until!!!
A new agent on your floor assumes you’re together, complimenting what a cute couple you are. Spencer, of course, loses it, getting all bright red and completely flustered because there is nothing more that he wants than to be considered your boyfriend, even if it’s just being mistaken as such. (He’ll take what he can get.) But you take his reaction as him being uncomfortable with the idea, and in an attempt to ease his concern (even if it does break your heart), you quickly correct them that oh, no, you’re just friends.
Then Spencer’s face falls and his heart is the one that’s breaking because why were you so quick to correct them? Do you really not like the idea of being with him that much? He knows it’s silly to be upset, you’re not together and you never did anything to suggest you were (completely wrong but we’ll let it slide) but there was a small part of him that really hoped that maybe, possibly, his feelings were reciprocated.
But now, clearly, they’re not, and he can’t help himself from avoiding you the next day because it hurts to be around you knowing he doesn’t have a chance. But then it only gets worse because it hurts just as much to be away from you, and you seem so concerned about him, and oh god he has no idea what to do with himself.
He comes to your apartment after work, and you somehow answer the door right as he starts to knock. The words struggle to come out at first, but then they do, and then he’s rambling, and it’s not entirely intelligible. But you get the gist, and it’s that he’s so in love with you! He seems so frantic that for the first time in your life, you want him to stop talking, so naturally you do what any other normal person would. Kiss him like your life depended on it. Right in your doorway. And. I don’t think there’s anything more I can (or should) say.  
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guided-by-stars · 3 months ago
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One of the aspects of the systems of belief established in ISAT that makes it so fascinating to examine is that they are are centered around praxes that aren’t focused on as much in the major religions in our world.
Much has been said about how the Change belief encourages self-exploration, (transness is seen as holy, exploration of identity is encouraged) and pressures those who don’t want to change who they are (Mirabelle). The underlying core of the Change belief is action. Active Choice is more encouraged than anything else. The choice to change your body, the choice to change yourself, the choice to change your circumstances, the choice to go on a pilgrimage, the choice to learn new skills, etc. Of course passive change is also celebrated- death is seen as just another Change, and I assume that would apply to aging in general (appreciation of elders?), but it’s not as pushed. In this way, the Change belief encourages autonomy, control over your own life, and ownership of your life circumstances.
On the other hand, those who believe in the Universe as a force of power in the world are faced with the opposite pressure. When the King and Siffrin are relating for the first time over their shared culture, they both remember the phrase “The Universe leads, we can only follow.” The underlying core of their belief is that what is fated must happen, it’s inaction. Passivity. Any drastic action that is taken is justified by it being a path the Universe led them on. When the King starts the battle, he says “Let’s see which side the Universe favors!” Whoever ultimately wins at the end was fated to win, and that could never have been changed. It’s about resignation, acceptance.
This ultimately impacts everything about how the story plays out. When Siffrin first realizes he’s in a time loop, he’s excited! The Universe has given him the power to change things! He’s being led on a path where he can protect his friends and make sure everything is alright! They’re fated to win! As the futility of his quest sets in though, he very quickly turns to resignation instead. What’s the point of getting upset over having to die again and again? There’s nothing he can do about it. The Universe leads and he can only follow. If anyone else was the one looping, they would probably react quite differently just due to that.
However, it’s more complex than just that. What about Wish Craft? Isn’t that purely about taking action, making a Change? Well, partially, but because of the culture that everyone who knows about Wish Craft is part of, it’s seen more as appealing to the Universe. Asking, pleading, for the current to bring you down the left stream instead of the right in the fork in the waters. If you gain something from Wish Craft, you were given it, you didn’t take it. Once again, it’s passive. If Wish Craft was a Vaugardian thing, it would certainly be seen differently.
If the Change belief’s focus on action encourages autonomy, control over one’s life, and free will, what does that say about the Universes resignation and acceptance? Once again, I’m reminded of Euphrasie repeating words as if she’s prerecorded, skipping like grooves on a well-worn CD.
There’s also something to be said about how, in the Change religion, they appeal to a deity, one that you can have a personal and positive relationship with, and those who believe in the Universe are believing in an unfeeling force of nature. None of this is to say either is more beneficial than the other, the pressure to always Change can be extremely destructive, and sometimes acceptance is much better than change. It’s just fascinating how much they come into conflict with each other.
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