#or his fragile masculinity if u will

[nevarroes]

page one | page two

now roll over already😖

[coffeeandinsanityy]

I'd go down on my knees to tie my girl's shoe laces anytime, idk what y'all mfs embarrassed about

[thebearer]

I have a violent mental image of coming home from a girls night after ~a few too many bevvies~ seeing ur hot ass man waiting at home and being like ive literally been wanting to fuck u all night and carmy is like uhh baby youre drunk, we absolutely arent doing that rn, can i offer you a snack perhaps and him dealing w his drunk and now emo girl abt how he wont touch u so he clearly doesnt think ur attractive😭

Carmen had a love hate relationship with your girl's night.

Not in the asshole-jagoff protective "I don't trust my girl" fragile masculinity way, but more so in the- and Carmen meant this in the nicest way, he did- that you were a mess when you were drunk.

He'd offered to pick you up, waiting on the curb outside the restaurant while you hugged and waved your friends goodbye before stumbling over to his car.

"Your Uber's here." Carmen grinned, leaning over to push the door open for you.

"Oh, he's a hot Uber driver, too." You grin, plopping into the seat. "Five stars already." You rasp, your lips hovering over his for a sloppy, sweet kiss.

Carmen's blushing, tasting the wine you drank on your tongue. He can feel the flush in your cheeks, the way your hand threads through the curls at the nape of his neck, pulling him closer and closer to you. You'd been drinking wine, so that meant Carmen was in for a night.

The whole ride home, you were handsy. Carmen nearly crashed the car when you palmed his dick unexpectedly through his jeans, grabbing his groin with a tiny smile.

"C'mon," Carmen's breath hitched, gripping the steering wheel hard. "Let go of me, Angel."

"Don't be mean t'me tonight, Carmy, I missed you." You whined, lip jutting dramatically, head falling against the headrest.

"'m not being mean." Carmen looked over at you pointedly, already seeing your lids droop, the small puffs of air passing out of your lips.

"You are." You grumbled, eyes still closed.

Carmen snorted lightly, but let you rest, slumped against the head rest while he fought his way through Chicago traffic and back to the apartment.

There, you'd seemed to gotten revamped even in your sleepy state. Carmen was helping you out of your clothes, you sprawled out on the bed, letting him shimmy your top off when you wrapped your legs around his hips, locking at the ankles and pushing on his back so he was flush against you.

Carmen grunted, hands bracing by your head to stop him while you laughed wildly. "Hey, Carmy." You smiled, glassy eyes dazzling up at him, bottom lip rolling between your teeth.

"What're you doin'?" Carmen couldn't help but laugh, small and breathy, but you were nothing if not persistent. A woman who knew what she wanted, and Carmen respected that.

"Carmy, I told you." You whined, hands wrapping around his neck. "I missed you tonight." Carmen just laughed. You pouted, head swimming while the room spun around you. "I wanna have sex, Carm."

Carmen snorted at your bluntness, pressing a small kiss to the corner of your mouth, trailing light kisses up your arm so you'd release your grip on him. "How about in the morning? When you're feelin'... better." Better was the last thing you'd be in the morning, Carmen knew that, which is why he set out the Advil already.

"You're no fun, Carm." You pouted dramatically, flopping over on your side, still naked from his failed attempts to put clothes on you.

"Baby, please, let me put your sleep clothes on-"

"-No, it's...it's fine, Carm. I'm hot anyways." You mutter, eyes drooping shut already, snuggled into the soft pillows.

Carmen rolled his eyes, wrestling you under the covers before slipping beside you. He had to turn the other way, away so his back was to yours, hoping and willing his erection to die down so he could sleep. He couldn't help how flustered he got, knowing you were naked next to him, hearing you beg to fuck him. And he would, he would fuck you in the morning, when you were sober and a little hungover, clinging to him and claiming his dick was the best hangover remedy there ever was. But for now, he was just happy you were home here, next to him and asleep.

[nile-the-empathy-cleric]

I'm a huge fan of your work, your writing is so beautiful, and the way you add your own personal love of art is just; it's genuinely amazing. I was wondering if you have any paintings that you think each of your favorite characters would represent or maybe even what u see when u look at them. ❤️🖼���🖌

Oh boy do I love this ask! Firstly, than you 🥺 you're too kind 💕

Second I have so many paintings that spring to mind for various characters! Immediately off the bat my brain went right to Lestat and how his presence and aesthetic (especially in 1920s New Orleans) gave gigantic J.C. Leyendecker vibes.

(left) The Sleuth J.C. Leyendecker, ca. 1906 and (right) Arrow Shirt Collar Ad, 1916. By J.C. Leyendecker For Arrow Shirt Collars, 1916

The way Leyendecker plays with shadow, light, and color to project an air of seduction and power is just *chef's kiss.* He is a master at depicting an idealized masculinity that still has a level of vulnerability. I don't think it's just the styling/ fashion of the men in Leyendecker's illustrations that remind me of Lestat, but the features as well. J.C. gives them this attitude of nonchalance but there's something deeply concerned with appearances underneath. Is that not Lestat?

For Claudia there are a couple. First (not a painting but a sculpture) is Degas' The Little Dancer Aged Fourteen. I look at this piece and think of the history of ballet and the connotations of ballet at the time Degas was working. In France at the time ballerinas were highly taken advantage of and exploited. The exploitation was sexual in nature and simultaneously adultified and infantilized. They were highly fetishized. It's very sad and tragic and it reminds me of Claudia. The Little Dancer has an almost defiant energy to her, like there is a sense of pride and restraint, something dignified despite her lesser social standing.

I also see something of Claudia in this piece: Girl in Pink Dress, ca. 1927 by Laura Wheeler Waring. I also think this girl embodies the qualities of both Bailey and Delainey's Claudias–– there's simultaneously an innocence and maturity. I see something similar in Isabella, (aka Young Woman with a Fan), 1906 by Simon Maris and I just think it's neat to see art of Black people done by a white person from the early 1900s that isn't fetishizing or racist (don't look at J.C. Leyendecker's art of Black people, yikes!)

For Louis, my first thought was Derek Fordjour's STRWMN, 2020. It gives NOLA Louis to me in terms of style, but also the colorful and fun energy has the vibes of his little journey of gay self-discovery in Paris. I also see Louis in Lois Mailou Jones' Negro Youth, 1929. It mirrors depressed Louis for me. There is something very fragile in his expression, but you can tell he's trying to be strong, much like Louis.

As for Armand? Well, the number one is Botticelli's Saint Sebastian (it just has an uncanny resemblance to Assad) and the metaphor is too apt to not point out. The other that immediately make me think of Armand is The Abduction of Ganymede by Correggio. It's less the painting and more the myth it's based on, but out of all the Ganymede paintings, Correggio's is my favorite.

And Daniel is just like... any Nan Goldin photo, but I'll pick Heart-shaped bruise, 1980. I don't think I need to give my thoughts here 😂

Thank you again for such a fun ask! I appreciate every message I get from anons and mutuals alike 🥰

[*Edit: Being transparent––I went back and corrected a mistake I made in the original because I don't want an inaccurate/ racist post going around, even after a correction in the reblogs if people aren't seeing the original. I accidentally implied that Laura Wheeler Waring was white. I meant the statement about Simon Maris, who was a Dutch portrait artist. Laura Wheeler Waring was a prominent Black artist. Lesson to self: do not write deeply thoughtful posts at 1 am while you have a fever.]

[doukeshi-kun]

i have some dad!kolya thoughts for u!

he always has his baby lying on his bare chest whenever he watches tv or takes a nap.

he always plays a bit rough with his kids, like play-fighting or literally throwing them in the air to make them laugh (and mama always nearly gets a heart attack).

throws tea parties with his daufhter(s) for their dolls and plushies and nearly has even more fun than she does, he doesn’t just pretend to like it, he really does and is having the time of his life.

when the kids sleep in their parents’ bed, they’re all over him, but he’s such a deep sleeper that he doesn’t mind it (even if they kick him in their sleep).

happily carries his kids in a carrier or sling on hikes or walks. always smooching them. let’s his daughter dress him up and do his hair. zero fragile masculinity to be found.

(lil suggestive) he’s a hot dad fr. when he’s taking his kids to the playground, there’s usually several single moms hitting on him.

snores.

these are all so cute. very very cute and i'm gonna reply one by one

i like to imagine that when dad!nikolai has a baby on his chest, he's gonna pat them, just making sure they're comfy and stay asleep. imagine he's also napping while the tv is on and when mama wants to change the tv, he's like "i'm watching." like any other dads do lol

evie and i have similar discussion about this where he'd play rough with his kids and they actually enjoy it. like, he'd toss them to the pool and mama woukd be worried by how he's tossing the kids and yet the kids would come back to him to get tossed again. karol would definitely do that

tea parties with his daughter is like his favourite activity. he's a girl dad through and through. i think he also takes it a little too seriously as if he is the princess

i don't think he minds about the kids being in his bed but i feel like there will also come a time where he has to carry them back to their rooms lol. bed is the only place he can be a baby to mama ;]

nikolai doesn't have fragile masculinity and i stand by that ( • ̀ω•́ )✧ in fact, he would encourage his daughter to play dress up with him. also, when in love, this man is a simp so he certainly wouldn't let mama do a lot of labour

he is a hot dad fosho. he gets the attention of single mothers but he's loyal to the one and only—but, maybe it's a little different if he's a single dad himself. he's for sure wants to look hot to get the attention of someone else

[glacierclear]

Having some mad fuckboy!Leon thoughts rn

After he's unlearned all the stuff he taught himself and is basically done with the whole fuckboy thing oh man he would be SO soft. Holding your hand? Check. Cuddling at his dorm? Check. Being more gentle and loving during sex? Also check.

Also, stealing his hoodies. He'd melt for sure

oh, for sure. healed fuckboy!leon would be a SIGHT TO BEHOLD.

he wouldn't be perfect...

progress isn't linear. he'd stumble a lot. make a lot of mistakes and backward steps. you would need to be patient. you would need to be careful. especially in the early stages. because damn, he's trying. he's trying so hard. and you need to acknowledge the effort, even if it's hard to see, because any praise towards this will mean so much to him.

it'd come out especially on his bad days. he's more impatient. short-tempered. lashes out over seemingly mundane things. you'll need to be firm but not demeaning. catch his tells, his habits, and figure out the real reason he's behaving the way he is.

you'll need to slowly teach him the true depth of his words. that they hurt you just as much as they hurt him. he's unfamiliar with the idea of accountability, so you need to teach him about consequences. let him know you're upset and angry at him. but just because you're upset doesn't mean he's irredeemable. he'll assume any pushback is you ending things permanently. he needs the space to fuck up and forgive himself.

and damn it all, he's the jealous type. possessive. protective as all hell. it's toxic, and you need to teach him boundaries. it'll be tough. he worked so fucking hard to get you, doesn't he deserve to have you the way he needs? but no. you need freedom. he'll learn eventually, but be prepared to send a lot of "im safe and i miss u" texts to him when you're out with friends.

speaking of toxic. the toxic masculinity will be hell to unpack. sometimes it's nice! he insists on you being passenger princess. he insists on picking up the bill (well, once you're actually dating). he doesn't mind taking care of spiders (and fine, just because you asked nicely, he won't kill them). but...the bads get real bad.

displaying any kind of vulnerable emotion is like pulling teeth. when he's nervous, scared, anxious...he'll take it out on others. or himself. early progress will be made when he's blackout drunk and spilling everything to you. he reveals the deepest, most fragile parts of himself on these nights. it's like he's an entirely different person. and the next morning he'll do his best to sweep it all under the rug, but you have to fight for it. accept him and love him despite how "totally fucking lame" he acted (his words, not yours).

that being said. the good parts? oh yeah. Boyfriend Material 100%.

he'd do anything for you. anything. don't even say shit as a joke because he'll do it. at a certain point he doesn't even care if his friends think he's being stupid. you're his whole world. he'd wear stupid t-shirts for you. go to that concert you're dying to see even if he thinks the music sucks. he'll bash his head into a wall and learn to bake french pastries if it'll get you to smile. through hell and high water, he'll follow.

and yeah, he weans himself off social media. stops posting thirst trap photos and cuts ties with his sneaky links. but the lack of external validation is felt, and it kind of falls on you to fill the void. clingy won't even begin to describe what he is. he'll resort to begging. he will. late to work in the morning? that's not his problem. you're staying in that damn bed and you are cuddling him. you think him wearing tank tops in the middle of December is just a dumb mistake, but you catch on quick when he starts to shiver and needs to huddle you for warmth. "you want me to die of hypothermia? c'mon, babe. get closer." and yeah. those ice cold hands are going straight on your stomach. have fun.

part of the excitement will come from truly learning who he is as a person. most of his herculean facade is a persona. he doesn't actually like beer. he likes dry whiskey and refined clear liquors. he doesn't actually enjoy parties. the crowds make him nauseous, and he can always blame it on the alcohol. he's not actually all that into sports. you figure out he has a well-loved public library card and he knows the mystery section like the back of his hand. he's vibrant. shockingly intelligent. gets that light in his eyes when you nudge him about his interests. it'll be hard to get him to admit it, but his favorite part of the week is huddling on the couch watching nature documentaries with you.

and it's a two-way street. he remembers everything about you. early on in your relationship you casually assume he'll never keep track of the important dates. that's the stereotype, right? you couldn't be more wrong. birthdays. anniversaries. doctor's appointments. your fucking dog's yearly vaccine. he won't necessarily go all-out, not until you're more of a long-term thing, but what he does is meaningful. sincere. you won't get $500 of flowers and chocolate for valentine's day, but he'll abduct you from work, drive you out far, far into the countryside. lay out a patchwork blanket and stare at the night sky. he brought your favorite brand of pita chips and sneakily worms a gift box in your hand. it's that stupid $15 thing that's been sitting in your online shopping cart for weeks that you could never justify buying. and yeah, he'd appreciate a blowjob under the stars, but seeing you happy is enough.

and you could never begin to imagine how loving and passionate he can get during sex. it's totally different than his usual flavor. casual hook-ups and one-night stands are merely a fraction of his power. he tends to avoid intimate gestures on those nights. no eye-contact. hardly any kissing. he likes it rough and he likes it fast. but with you? he takes his time. commits your body to muscle memory. his gaze is intense, and he watches every reaction, trying to map out your flesh like a cartographer. he'll happily make out with you for upwards of a couple hours before you even begin the real foreplay. and you always cum first. always.

oh, but if you're not a fan of PDA...he might be a problem. he's proud of you. you're the hottest thing on two legs as far as he's concerned. he'll have no issue grabbing your ass, wrapping a hand around your waist, kissing along your neck, whispering the most obscene things in your ear. it's not even to make a point. there's no rhyme or reason. he just wants to. and you're right there. and what right does the world have to tell him to stop? does it make people uncomfortable? who cares. he'll lay off if it really bugs you that much...but if he catches anyone staring at you too long he'll ramp it up. it's almost aggressive. you turn to scold him, noticing how his eyes aren't even on you. he's staring at someone else. someone who's looking at what's his.

he's a yes man, too. if you need restraint and careful guidance in your life...he's not the one. he'll support any weird, out of the blue hobby you want to pursue. if you even joke about quitting your job he'll egg you on. "i'll drive right up there and tell your boss i'll fuck his wife!" and you have to talk him down. he'll punch the sun for you. he'll be behind every impulsive purchase. every 4am trip to walmart. every instinct to feed your id. any "little treat" you want to have he'll get it. because you deserve the best. if you ever want to have a stable bank account you need the be the voice of reason. because it's not gonna be him.

yeah. he'll have a lot of problems. don't worry about that. but, at least with fuckboy!leon, you'll almost never have any doubts that he loves you. once you manage to pin his heart on his sleeve, it's there for life and it'll always be yours.

[hotluncheddie]

t4t chubby autistic steddie GO

i have been thinking about this (nsfw from twitter!!) art lately so i am here with u <3

even tho i get nervous to write trans characters, idk why, i just don't wanna mess it up i think

but im doing my best!! bc autistic and gender exploration are very lovely wonderful cozy subjects so i'm gonna focus on that

this is such a string of ideas but - 4 u <3 :3c

Stevie leaves with Eddie and Robin, taking their trust fund and leaving their parents to it - too the rest of their lives - without her. Like the Harringtons always hoped, really.

Stevie doesn't need them, the money is useful but they offer nothing more to her.

She's able to buy an apartment. In Chicago. With her loves. They learn how to live. How to live together. How to be at peace.

There's big bright widows in the main space, with light and air and the sunset. The two bedrooms are cozy and warm and it's a place for them all to grow.

'There's chips here.' Eddie says. They have a matching day off and she's trying to practice what it is to do nothing, to truly rest. Eddie helps, by being there, keeping her still with his hands and his love.

But Stevie tenses up, she was snacking, has been snacking, trying to learn her hunger signals better - what they feel like to her. It was always a rule not to east in her room, not to eat between meals. But she was hungry, she had a snack.

'I'm not judging, I'm saying so we remember to take it out next time one of us goes to the kitchen.' Eddie says, coming back from changing the tape, kissing her. Kissing her and kissing her.

Stevie relaxes.

'You've gained a little weight.' Robin says, laying on Stevies thighs on the couch, crocheting while Stevie watches sports and rubs her knuckles agains her teeth, twirling a strand of Robins hair in her fingers.

She looks down at her best friend. Robin looks back at her.

Robin smiles.

'It's good. You look more like you than you ever have before.'

Stevie smiles back. Tries not to cry.

Stevie letting herself change, relax. Unlearn those eating habits that helped her feel in control. Instead allowing herself to enjoy, and eat the things she wants to, the things she likes.

Eats pasta every night for a month and doesn’t feel bad about it. Doesn’t force herself to eat kale because she hates it, spinach is good enough. She is good enough.

Eddie gets little chubbier, in this new life. After recovering from nearly dying. Explains to Stevie in his long lilting way that he likes it, feels more protected, like his skin isn’t so fragile now.

He’s never liked his body but now he truly knows how short life is, and, maybe he can learn to like this new one. In this new place, in the love that surrounds him.

Plus, the bats destroyed his chest. So without that in the way, no longer lurking and potentially ruining his day. He realises he can shed that background fixation he always seemed to have with thinness. The idea that it would make him look more masculine or more androgynous. Curves were for girls and Eddie was not. That.

But now, now, who fucking cares. He’s alive. He needs to eat.

Steve feels a finger trailing over her hip, dipping into the band of her underwear, skimming over her crack and the the ridges of stretch marks that lead up to her waist.

'So so pretty' Eddie whispers, and it's filled with so much awe, so much grace, so much reverence and love.

Stevie shivers, feeling endless and grounded and like her body is here and hers and everything she ever dreamed of because it exists now.

She puts her hand under her loose shirt, cupping her belly. Skin still sleep warm and the energy of her palm seems to cover her whole body in warmth, in light and softness. Tinging and bright. Still being traced lightly by the love of her life. But being loves by her own hands, now, too.

She exists. And finally, everything is beautiful.

[erosjournal]

*checks the date* oh oct 11 already passed. in honor of national coming out day, we now have my argos 2 queer headcanons (in my au-ish)! i already posted something similar but here u go!

percy jackson

cisgender guy, but breaks gender norms/hj 💪

he/him (they/them r fine but he answers he/him when asked)

bi with a fem leaning. (i believe luke was his gay awakening. i dont ship them, but like nico and percy, yk?)

dating annabeth :)

annabeth chase

cisgender girl, but also breaks gender norms

she/her (also okay w/ they/them)

pan ! (i believe she likes people purely based on their personality and their intelligence, not on gender)

demiromantic (like how her crush on percy developed, and sorta w/ luke)

dating percy

jason grace

cis guy (he has slight internal “toxic/fragile��� masculinity bc hes struggled to be the male leader people expect him to to be tho :/)

he/him

bi with a fem leaning (takes him a while to realize bc be thought he had to like girls… until percy/leo came along 👀)

either dating or crushing on leo (i say either bc u can interpret it as you please. personally, i ship valgrace so yea)

piper mclean

gender non-conforming / demigirl ! (she feels relatively feminine, genderwise not expression, but not fully)

she/they (he/him is eh, they prefer not to use he/him)

queer (mostly attracted to females, but some men slip in. she prefers queer and to not label their sexuality)

expresses their gender fluidly (some days masc, some days fem, some androgynous. she also enjoys shorter hair)

dating or crushing on reyna :)

leo valdez

masculinely gender non-conforming as well (he is mostly masculine, but doesnt think cis male is the best label for his gender. he’s not gender queer though)

he/him (they/them is fine as well, but NO she/her)

poly ! (not polyamorous 😭 basically, he’s attracted to mainly guys and girls with no preference in there)

dating or crushing on jason

hazel levesque

cis girl (even though shes cis, she is now the biggest ally in the 21st century. after learning abt it from nico, she wanted others to feel safe as she did now that there wasn’t as physical racism, idk if that makes sense but whatever)

she/her (i mean, technically they/them is fine but like, she doesn’t introduce herself with them… yk?)

straight and ace (no, shes not ace just bc shes 13-14 yall, people stay ace)

dating frank !

frank zhang

cis guy (same as jason, has a lot of internal “toxic/fragile” masculinity since he was never a super buff and leader typa guy)

he/him

straight and ace as well :)

(btw, his body never physically changes !! )

dating hazel :)

bonus !

nico di angelo

demiboy (or trans masc, or cis. there is no in between)

he/him (they/them r fine as well)

gay (idk what else to say man)

dating will

reyna avila ramirez-arellano

non-binary / gnc / gender queer (their genders more like: im not a girl, im not a guy, but other than that idgaf)

all pronouns (they/them is prefered, but they’re fine with she/her and he/him)

lesbian (into any non-men. idk wtf was going on w/ jason and… ig percy)

dresses very androgynously (lowkey always in armor anyways)

crushing doesnt feel like something reyna would do… but dating / ROMANTICALLY ADMIRING piper

(ALSO! I USE SHE/HER PRONOUNS ON MY OLD FICS FOR THEM, I WILL START USING SHE AND THEY :DD)

also guys, im not using this as an excuse to make all the pjo characters queer. this is just how i interpret and hc them in honor of coming out fay (oct 11) !!

[15-lizards]

how do you think Robert Baratheon felt and thought about Tywin Lannister? Also do you have any thoughts on Jon Arryn?

POV ur Cersei and ur republican dude bro arranged marriage wants to talk about football and beer and make slightly offensive off color jokes with his neo-con return to tradition father in law who is trying to talk about how some ethnic minority is ruining the economy.

But if u want my real thots…he definitely despised Tywin but knew he was useful so he suffered through him. Robert definitely thought they were begrudging allies and equals, but Tywin never had any perceptions other than “I’m playing this guy like a viola”. Robert obviously getting intertwined stay afloat after the war but he knows he can’t get rid of Tywin he’s too important. It wasn’t like he was smart enough to do that anyways. Mostly he just accepts his fate bc he doesn’t like to think critically. What else is new

Weirdly enough Robert also subconsciously knew that Tywin was a threat to his masculinity, even if he couldn’t form the actual thought. He always postured and brushed any sort of intellectualism as being a sign of someone who isn’t a “real man” but that’s what ppl say when they’re defensive. Being made to look like an idiot by his father in law in front of his entire council definitely put him to shame a lot, and when he realized it he channeled it through that hot headed anger we see.

Much to be said about medieval chivalry/masculinity and how fragile it is in this setting but maybe when I’m more coherent

And if you want to know what I think ab Jon Arryn. One of those stand up community leaders who has all his sins brushed under the wrong bc he helped the greater good or whatever. Never mind the whole marrying a teenager thing. Old ass pedophile mostly

[dateamonster]

the good weed will have u waking up the next morning like theres a connecting thread of monster hunting shows where the main characters are simultaneously symbols of the status quo charged with identifying and often eliminating the Others of the world while being othered themselves in such a way that upholding the institutions they do can be read as acting directly against their own best interest. this is especially obvious in something like x-files where the characters are literally agents of the fbi and the show is structured more or less in the format of a police procedural, while half of the main duo is defined primarily by his love and fascination with the paranormal, a curiosity about the greater world which the very powers he serves we know would seek to contain, to secret away, or to destroy. or even like supernatural where monster hunting has this inextricable tie to a sort of stereotypical rugged masculinity and stoicism that is supposed to appeal to the audience even while we see it emotionally and physically destroying the characters who most strive to embody it. within both of these shows, and im sure others within the genre (looking at you buffy, tho i dont have time to unpack all that rn), there is this vein of suppressed queerness that runs through the narrative, as if in embodying this role as the defender of hegemony and eliminator of that which disrupts the perceived natural order, the archtypal monster hunter is made to recognize and subsequently repress the aspects of that cultural deviance that manifest within themself. going back to supernatural, this i think is especially evident in the conflict between the text of show and its large queer fanbase, who seemed to recognize within its otherwise pretty cut and dry story of a manly man who likes cars and guns and follows almost blindly the demands of his patrilinial inheritance a sort of self-parody, the conformity to the role of this cishetpatriarchal protector ideal so complete and almost excessive that it doubles back and becomes a kind of drag, yet so fragile that continuing to uphold it appears to be a constant source of pain and conflict for its characters.

im not saying such and such monster hunter show is inherently a secret queer narrative, but i AM saying every monster hunter is a huge fucking closet case.

[daistea]

thrun is not the submissive one. He might bottom here and there, but that's a position, not a role. I also don't like this shit because I see it with basically every character I like. They're a bit feminine. Okay, sure. But then every edge on them is sanded off until they're disgusting smooth. It's like this gross contradiction of excess fragility. It skeeves me the hell out because it takes a lot of the cool traits and feminizes them totally and basically says "Hey! Being feminine isn't cool or complex or edgy. It's soft." Like. Hey. Hey. That is so fucked? Do you not realize that?

Feminization literally so often takes away what is so interesting and meaningful to a character for the sake of shipping and I've been dealing with it since L fucking Lawliet. And I'm tired. I don't care. Make the guy the bottom if you want. But when people get rid of traits and characterization and change the guy to do it, it's like... ???? I don't know.

Maybe just do it because you want to instead of making it some gender thing? It's weird when people go "femme = bottom". You are remaking gender roles! At that point, I dunno, why are we not writing straight sex?

And honestly, I have lots of thoughts about sexuality and dominance and I think there are so many interesting ways to play it out other than physical strength, which, by the way, if you're going off of that, it's Mithrun!

There's coercion. There's mental dominance. There are so many interesting ways to be dominated beyond pure strength that it seems silly that conquest would come down to only that. You've got this guy, knife-sharp, which is to say smart, and incredibly blunt. He's ruthless, relentless, single-minded. And you're making him the fucking submissive? Like. Okay. Sure. Maybe sometimes. But I also think he's impatient, actually. I think you push him too much when he wants and he decides it's his turn now, and God help you.

There are so many interesting ways to explore the dynamic and the feelings and him as a person. He's a stubborn menace. And it's so neat to make the dom a brat, too! Ugh. The bicker. The banter.

I agree with all u said, here’s a Yeah

I know a lot of it is just societal. We’re trained to assign roles, and when we do that our brains go okay here are the traits associated with those roles :)

I feel like a lot of modern fandom should’ve moved on from that by now, though?? And with dunmeshi especially, you’ve got bearded manly-looking men who cook and garden and sympathize/care for everyone he meets— traditionally feminine traits. You’ve got dwarf women who are stronger than the main character— Namari. Youve got a whole race of characters who look and dress generally feminine, but the main elf is ruthless, he disregards others’ feelings and lives, he’s blunt, he kills people and he does it in a skirt LOL

(I know it’s not technically a skirt but the concept remains ✌️)

Mithrun’s traits are traditionally associated with masculinity. (Women are like that too, though, and actually I want to see more women written like that!) Anyway, despite that, he still gestures in a feminine way sometimes. He’s like if a man and a woman had a baby. Mithrun isn’t necessarily defined by specific roles, which is a consequence of his backstory. That’s how he’s written. He has the capacity to both submit and to dominate— which uh, most real people do, I think. To an extent. I don’t mean sexually, I mean in a relationship. Most emotionally developed people sometimes submit, sometimes grow more dominant, depending on the situation. But what do I know? The world constantly surprises and corrects me.

If ya wanna make Mithrun the bottom in physical moments, go for it. But just because that is considered a traditionally feminine role does not mean he has to be feminine. His characterization/personality does not have to morph and change to fit what sex position you want him in.

Anyway sorry for the rambling, what I’m trying to say is that dungeon meshi has nuanced characters. And I feel like assigning gender roles + the traditional traits of those roles to these characters erases the many dimensions they were written with.

On a physical note, I believe it also subconsciously stems from who’s smaller— another societal norm. I like a good size difference, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t think size necessarily equals role. Just bc Mithrun is shorter and can be easily manhandled does not mean he’s an uwu sub softboy who needs coddling. (I think for him, specifically, it also plays into how his disabilities are subconsciously viewed. But that’s a whole other can of worms to snack on.)

If you insist on giving roles, I think it’s actually more fun to give the little guy the more dominant role!

And I do understand why some people gravitate towards dom/sub top/bottom roles. There’s nothing wrong with that. All I would like to see is some brain power behind the characterization and portrayal.

There’s a lot I can but will not say about shipping in fandom. I adore shipping, don’t get me wrong, but I’m just very funny about Mithrun.

In the end, creativity is about fulfillment and joy and expression! If you wanna use these characters to portray your fantasy/tastes then go ahead. But if you want to portray them in canon-accurate ways, with real relationship dynamics, then all I recommend is to not put as much importance/significance into roles. Look at the characters on their own. Canon is your reference, not fanon.

eepy

[kombuuuu]

I wanna say THAAAAANK YOOUUUU for not writing 42 miles as some stalker obsessive bf like holy shit

There's a weirdly concerning amount of mfs who reallllly want 42 miles to imprison them and shi like 💀 and the ppl who request fanfics of him cheating on gwen with us??? LIKE WHAT?? WHY NOT BOTH????

ur silly little goofy impression of him is so nice to read tysm

YOUREEE WELCOMEEE 🤭🤭🤭‼️‼️

i know baby, i know

the [toxic relationship = hot] girlies did kind of plague the tag for a good while. i’m working very hard to combat this

cheating fics.. ive seen em

i do not in my right mind believe he is ever capable of cheating

my boy was raised by a single ma, in a struggling home, with his momma staying loyal to her dead husband?? completely widowed ??? like cmon u think he’s that dumb be fr

AND YEAH??? WHY NOT BOTH. i need more gwendy action in my life stg

thank kyuuuu :3 i like watching him fumble and trip over himself and get all nervous and goofy and when he fucks up hes aware of it and it’s nothing TOO bad,, you’re just probably upset and he doesn’t know why

“ohhh shit i fucked up real bad” “yeah miles, you did” “well the fuck do i do now??” “figure it out???” “cmon ma, at least give me a clue!” “clue?!— this ain’t blues clues get ur ass outta my room.” “oh fuck, wait—,”

I LOVE HUMAN ERROR!!!! and i truely believe he has absolutely no idea how to make up for things so he just asks his ma

she tells him the secret to wooing a woman is to beg on his damn knees and make a fool outta himself for her [see Miles 42 Headcanon List for longer excerpts of Miles grovelling.]

cause no fragility comes in a masculinity like that

and it works cause who tf wouldn’t forgive that man

[slut4seonghwa]

you stare at the text for what seems like the 100th time today. since you got it, you haven't been able to focus. who knew a simple text that read, "i'm flying out for the weekend, i'll call you when i land", could throw off your whole day.

it was from your ex. it's been 2 years since you broke it off because of his job, that required him to travel all over the world. he asked you to go with him and you rightfully declined because what the fuck do you look like leaving your life behind for a man?

"babe," your boyfriend -- right, you have a boyfriend -- pulls you out of your thoughts, "you've been staring at that text for a while, what's wrong?"

you sigh, "just, an old friend of mine is coming back to town and wants to meet up."

"that's it? then why do you seem so bothered, did you guys fallout or something?"

“something like that.”

"if she's asking to meet up, she probably wants to reconcile."

oh, he wants to do a lot more than reconcile. you know exactly what he wanted when he sent the text. and... it would be nice to see him again, to feel him ag- no! what are you thinking? grow a backbone and stand up!

"maybe he does."

“oh. i’m sure everything will be fine,” he gives you a small reassuring smile.

it probably isn’t wise to keep doing this especially since you actually like your boyfriend, it wouldn’t be fair to him. so you text your ex.

| no, i have a boyfriend now.

| idgaf he can have u after i leave

--

"who's dick is bigger, mine or his?"

you sigh and look away. men and their fragile masculinity. he’s been asking questions about your boyfriend the whole night you’ve linked up.

he grabs you by the jaw to make you face him. "answer."

"his." your response makes him falter, but he quickly picks back up, hitting all the right spots. now, you didn't lie when you said your boyfriend was bigger, but he couldn't use it the way heeseung could.

he catches the indulgence in your face and your soft moans and that strokes his ego. "i bet he doesn't give it to you like i do huh?"

you roll your eyes, "stop talking about my boyfriend and fuck me."

[r4ins]

could u pls make another dick grayson x male reader fic? ^^

Dick Grayson x Top Male Reader

cw. bottom dick x dom male reader

“I thought you Bats didn't approve of gun ownership,” Y/N murmurs when they step over the carpeted threshold. Dick trails him, hands slipped into the back pockets of his jeans. Y/N definitely hasn’t been looking at how they frame that cute ass.

Dick doesn’t seem to notice, his gaze trailing over the wares with aloof curiosity, waiting as Y/N approaches the nearest rack. Doesn’t bother to turn over the gaudy little price tag; he can afford any model he wants.

“I don’t have an issue with you owning guns,” Dick replies lightly, and Y/N hums. “I do have an issue with you using them on innocent civilians, though.”

“What about smart-talking vigilantes?” Y/N quips back, and looks up in time to see the man flush. Dick’s gaze slides away, nonchalant, and he clears his throat.

“I mean for your work. If you’re just looking for some toys to try out at the range, I’m not going to hold you back.”

“And there’s no ulterior motive to wanting to accompany me into a gun shop,” Y/N returns with a crooked brow.

“No,” Dick says, admirably level.

Y/N hums again, and wanders over to the handguns. He palms the nearest, pulling it off the rack to test the grip, smooth his trigger finger down the barrel. “See anything you like?”

Dick smiles. “I don’t want a gun. They’re your thing. I’ve got all I need with my escrima.”

“Sure, Grayson.”

He palms the slide, listening for the satisfying clack of polymer settling. He lifts the firearm and squints his good eye down the sights, aiming for a rack of semiautomatics across the room. Dick’s gaze follows him, but there’s nothing in his expression to give the game away. Doesn’t mean Y/N misses the minute hitch in his heart rate.

He lowers the gun, ejects the empty clip. “So you don’t have an issue with my work?”

Dick makes a complicated expression. “An issue? Maybe. Would I prefer you were putting your talents to better use? Absolutely. Am I going to try to stop you? I’m not that stupid. And you’re holding a gun.”

Y/N snaps the clip back into the well, holding Dick’s gaze as he does. Which means he sees the heat bleed into those blue orbs. “And they say you’re just the pretty one.”

Dick gives him a grin for that, trailing Y/N as he shifts down the wall, setting that gun aside and trying a higher caliber.

“Charming. I am more than just a pretty face though.” When Y/N opens his mouth, Dick cuts him off with, “Don’t tell me I’ve got a pretty ass too. I’ve heard that one before. Come up with something original.”

Y/N grunts, and weighs the new firearm in his palm. It’s heavier, the frame steel. Dick’s throat bobs when he swallows.

“Have any favourites?”

“Favourites?” Dick repeats blankly.

Y/N waggles the gun in his grip. “Any favourites?”

“Oh.” Dick flushes, then nods at the gun in Y/N’s palm. “That one’s bigger.”

Y/N gives him a wry smirk. “Ever the size queen, Grayson.”

Dick scowls. “I didn’t mean like that. You’re big, I figure a bigger gun is something you’re after. Fragile masculinity and all that.”

Y/N toys with the hammer, ratcheting it back slowly under Dick’s burning gaze. “You really don’t know the first thing about guns, do you?”

“I’ve studied guns,” Dick contradicts, hands slipping from his pockets to cross over his chest, defensive. He leans his weight into one hip, considering Y/N’s current fascination. “Bruce gave us all the rundown.”

“You haven’t studied them yourself though, have you? Haven’t gotten familiar with them, intimate.” Y/N’s grin becomes a tad more malicious when Dick shifts at that, so he smothers it back to acceptable impassivity. “You could do with an education, Grayson.”

“And you’re going to teach me, aren’t you?” Dick suggests, crooking a dark brow. He doesn’t look offput by the idea, though.

“Is there anyone who knows guns better than me?” Y/N counters, returning the handgun to its hook. Dick’s expression is just the barest bit crestfallen at the surrender.

He gathers himself rather quickly though, to quip, “Deathstroke.”

Indignation spills across Y/N’s features before he can curb it, displeasure twisting his lips down at the corners. Dick’s grin grows in response.

“Jealous, Y/N?”

“Watch your tone, Dick.”

“Oh no,” Dick purrs, and circles around behind Y/N to lean one hip against the nearest counter, where Y/N’s eyeing the rows of custom engraved bullets with intrigue. “Don’t tell me your ego is that easily bruised.”

“If you want to talk bruises, that can certainly be arranged.”

Dick’s lips tick up another notch. “Bit cliche, don’t you think? You’ve only spanked me - what - forty-five times, at least count? Losing your touch a bit, babe.”

“Or maybe,” Y/N contradicts in a low murmur, “I just know all your kinks so well by now, little bird.”

Dick flushes at the nickname, but lifts his chin an inch, challenging. “I don’t think you know all my kinks.”

Y/N scoffs, and brushes past him to retrieve another firearm, far above where Dick can reach. Doesn’t miss the younger man’s gaze appreciatively trailing the length of his arm when he stretches upward.

He flips the gun over in his palm, watching the light dance down the sleek black metal, the way it catches in Dick’s blue eyes. “You’re not as subtle as you think you are, Grayson.”

“Subtle?” Dick prompts, saccharine.

Y/N glances up, meets that gaze with his own eye.

There’s the sharp, bright chirp of a momentary alarm, and then the electricity snaps with a harsh sizzle, the store falling into immediate dimness around them. Y/N’s gaze goes to the door, to mark the reinforced steel bolt that locks into place. Dick’s gaze sweeps the counter and the unmanned racks.

“Lockdown,” Y/N murmurs, on the lazy side of alert. “Someone tripped the alarm.”

“No one else in the store,” Dick informs him, in quick report. “Unless someone’s in the back.”

They pause for a moment, to note the stillness and the distinct lack of panic.

“False alarm,” Dick entreats, and Y/N nods an agreement.

“No getting out until they reset the breaker, I’d say,” Y/N concurs, shifting around Dick to return the firearm to its shelf. Then he has an idea.

He withdraws the gun, index fingertip stroking the steel.

Waits until Dick’s gaze slowly returns back to the metal, like a moth to flame, before he offers, “I suppose I could give you that lesson while we wait.” The suggestive stroke of his finger down the barrel leaves no room for implication.

“Seriously?” Dick says with a hint of incredulity, and eyes the gun.

Y/N lets it loll in his grip, if only so he can enjoy the way Dick’s eyes fitfully track the firearm. “I need a new gun. It would be negligent of me not to test it before purchase.”

Dick’s gaze flicks to the door, and then the empty counter, skimming that sleek barrel before it jumps back up to Y/N. His pulse is rabbiting. “You’re serious.”

When Y/N just holds his gaze, steady and unwavering, Dick’s throat bobs. He bleats a short, tittering laugh, his gaze flashing to the door again as his weight shifts against the case.

“Here? Right now?”

“Can you think of somewhere better?” Y/N returns, and smirks at the scowl Dick throws him.

So the little bird needs convincing. Y/N’s a regular charmer.

He takes a step forward, ignoring the reflexive tense that halts the air in Dick’s lungs, and stops just short of crowding the boy. Ensures he’s only barely touching the front of Dick’s torso, enough to set the man’s senses to blistering.

Dick swallows again, and looks up to meet his eye.

“I think we both know how this is going to go, little bird,” Y/N murmurs, tone deep in a way that pulls a shiver from the acrobat’s arching spine. He lets his wrist lull until the muzzle of the gun in his palm nudges Dick’s thigh, just so he can enjoy the way the boy flinches at the cold touch, distracted. “The question is whether you still need convincing.”

Dick’s gaze flicks down and back up when the muzzle traces the joint of his thigh and hip, trailing higher before returning. Y/N’s lips quirk at the involuntary shudder it produces.

Then those pretty blue eyes flash across the store one more time, to each corner of the room and back over to the counter. Cataloguing surveillance cameras probably, though he arrives at the same deduction as Y/N; whatever tripped the power to the store probably cut the power to the surveillance feeds too.

All the privacy they need to get started.

Dick shifts then, hands lifting to Y/N’s hips to ease him back a step. Just far enough away from the counter that the little bird can slide down to his knees between Y/N’s boots, eyes locked on his the whole while.

It’s an intoxicating sight, having a man like Dick Grayson willingly sit on his heels at Y/N’s feet. Makes his mind race with wicked possibilities, makes him almost wish they had more than a few minutes before the electricity comes back on.

Let it not be said that Y/N can’t make the most of a time-sensitive situation.

He rolls his wrist, letting the cold metal glide up the angle of the man’s jaw. Dick tilts his head into the motion, giving him a soft little moan when those sights scrape down the ridges of his windpipe and then press in against his pulse. The little notches leave twin marks when Y/N pulls them back, but only so he can nudge Dick’s gaze back up to his own again.

“Didn’t need that much convincing after all,” he points out, and chuckles at the flash in Dick’s gaze. His fingers slip into the man’s dark locks, a hush cresting over his lips as he taps the barrel of the gun against that handsome chin. “Don’t pout, little bird. We both know how much you’ve been begging for a good throat-fucking.”

“Didn’t think I’d be getting it from your gun,” Dick admits. Y/N can tell from the tightness of the words just how affected the man is, see how much he leans into the sensation when Y/N drags the gun up to knock gently against his cheekbone. “You’re not one to share, usually.”

“If you’re going to mouth off,” he warns, “I can give you a nice pretty bruise to remember the occasion by.”

It’s a delightful sight, watching the words tumble through the boy’s skull, seeing the way he conjures and discards quips just as quickly. Weighing the merit of each against the possibility of Y/N knocking his teeth around in retribution.

He settles on, “I can find something else to do with my mouth, sir.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Y/N praises gruffly, and reaffirms his grip on the boy’s hair, holding him steady as he aligns the barrel with those begging lips. He makes sure to stop a few inches short of penetrating the man’s mouth though, just to watch the confusion and then the realisation crest over Dick’s features.

The little bird’s been trained well though, because Y/N doesn’t even have to bleat a guiding command before that tongue dips out to lather the underside in a long, tantalising swipe. Y/N hums an approving note, offering more of the barrel as the man’s enthusiasm rises. There’s something about the sight of those soft, pliant lips caressing hard metal that has Y/N’s blood heating, has him fighting the urge to just fuck straight into the boy’s begging mouth.

“Chamber's empty, right?” Dick asks between dragging kisses down the cold metal.

Y/N gives a responding hum. “Hard to say.”

Dick stills for a beat, eyes flashing up. “Y/N-”

He takes advantage of the man’s slack jaw to press the muzzle between his teeth, ignoring the bleat of surprise in favour of enjoying the way Dick immediately opens to allow the gun entrance. It slides across his tongue, sights clacking on his teeth as it dips inside.

Y/N doesn’t push it farther than that, giving his bird a moment to adjust. Those blue eyes are heated, but from the way his cheeks hollow and those pretty lashes flutter invitingly, Y/N assumes the outrage is fleeting.

“That’s the way,” he purrs in approval, enjoying the shiver that traces down Dick’s spine, the way he tilts his throat open a few inches further. Betters the angle of Y/N’s gun when it slips over his plush lips.

The roll of the flesh beneath the unyielding metal is mesmerising, as is the way the boy takes every slow thrust so readily. He looks completely focused, on his knees, at Y/N’s mercy. Every sense and nerve attuned to the inexorable press of that gun further and further into his throat.

“Come on, little bird,” he coaxes, easing the barrel deeper. “Something tells me you’ve got a little more give in you. I’ve seen you take cock deeper than that.”

Dick whines at the tease, jaw opening farther to let him in, to beckon that gun deeper into his throat. He only gags once, when the sights press against the roof of his mouth, and then he’s drawing in a sharp breath, wresting free of Y/N’s grip in his hair to bear down on the weapon.

When he pulls back up, Y/N only lets him withdraw as far as letting the sights clack against the back of his teeth. Those blue eyes slide up to meet his, awaiting instruction, so Y/N gives it to him.

“How about you tell me how much you want it, little bird?” he suggests, and pumps the gun once, slowly, into his mouth just to watch those gorgeous eyes water. “Convince me how much you need a gun down your throat.”

To his credit, Dick doesn’t try to pull back any further. Not that he’d get far, with Y/N’s unrelenting grip holding him at just the right angle. His tongue dips out once, in an attempt to wet his lips perhaps, before he tries to speak around the barrel filling his mouth.

It’s barely coherent, but Y/N can interpret the sentiment of the, “Please, Y/N,” from the earnestness in the little bird’s eyes. He watches the man swallow, that throat flexing as that tongue withdraws briefly, before he tries again, moaning the words out around the muzzle in his mouth.

Y/N holds him there, lets the man beg and plead around the obstruction for a few seconds longer. Just until he can see the first bead of drool spill over the stretched corners of those lips, see the flush that takes over his cheeks when Dick realises, see the way he tries to angle himself to curb it and finds himself trapped beneath Y/N’s grip.

“What a pretty sight you make,” Y/N coos, tilting his head sideways until the string of drool is caught beneath what remains of the light. If it takes longer to drip down the boy’s chin too, that's just a bonus. “Making a mess of yourself.”

The droplet parts from Dick’s wavering chin, splattering on the toe of Y/N’s boot as they both watch. Y/N takes the moment of distraction to thrust the barrel deep, enjoying the sound of the man’s choke, the slick sound of saliva as he gags, before he withdraws it back to a reasonable length again.

“Just begging for it, aren’t you, slut?” he says quietly, smirking when Dick’s gaze flashes up. It’s wide and open, laid bare for him.

Y/N slides back the gun, ignoring Dick’s bitten down whine as he wipes the weapon clean on each of his cheeks. Feels a thrum of heat at the way Dick’s lashes flutter with shame, at how the spit must feel drying on his skin. Then he returns the gun to rest on the man’s lower lip as he shifts his other hand to unbuckle his belt.

“I don't think I’d even need this,” Y/N ponders aloud, rolling the flesh of Dick’s lip beneath the muzzle, “to get you to take cock like a good whore. You’re eager enough already.”

Dick moans, soft and breathless, when Y/N palms his cock, eyes flickering between the progress of his calloused hand and Y/N’s burning gaze.

“I think you’re just looking for an excuse,” Y/N continues, peeling his jeans down far enough that he can bear his cock to the cool air, and pause to sigh, “so that no one blames you for being the eager little slut you are.”

“Please,” Dick whispers, lips catching on the barrel when he speaks. It kicks Y/N’s pulse up another notch.

“How about you show your gratitude by sucking me and my gun off?” Y/N suggests, enjoying the breath that hitches in the man’s throat. “Then I’ll let you keep the excuse to take back to Daddy Bats when he asks why you were on your knees in broad daylight sucking off a mercenary.”

The groan is much more audible this time, the need obvious in the way his hands fist the material of Y/N’s jeans. He doesn’t keep the bird waiting, angling the gun into the corner of Dick’s lips as he feeds his cock into the vigilante’s mouth.

Dick takes him eagerly, familiarity taking over as he sets to work. Y/N lets him adjust for a few moments before he taps the gun against his cheeks, humming approval when they hollow obediently.

It’s wet and hot, those lips sinful in the way they wrap around Y/N’s cock like they were made for nothing else. The small, pleading moans that spill up the boy’s throat are a gorgeous accompaniment, betraying the need in that heated gaze.

“That’s it, little bird,” Y/N murmurs, chuckling at the whine Dick lathers around his cock. Those pretty lashes flutter when he presses the man’s face down on his cock, gun scraping across his cheekbone to dig into his temple.

He lifts a thumb to draw down the hammer, making sure every click of the mechanism reverberates into the boy’s crooked ear. Those keens rise to a fever pitch when he releases it, his motions growing sloppily desperate as he fucks down onto Y/N. Punctuating each moan with the mercenary’s cock hitting the back of his throat.

“I could blow your brains out, just like this,” Y/N coaxes, and curls his finger off the trigger guard.

Those pretty blues roll, his motions jerking to a surprisingly sudden halt as he shudders. For a moment, Y/N wonders if he’s taken it too far; then the flush spreads over the little bird’s cheeks, a sheepish edge to the gaze he won’t lift to meet Y/N’s eyes.

The realisation crawls over Y/N’s skin like a palpable heat, thundering down to his groin as he fucks tightly into Dick’s slack, recovering mouth. The thought that the man could come just from the threat of a gun has Y/N spilling down his throat, grunting as he empties.

Dick takes it all with only the mildest of chokes, Y/N guiding palm helping him to keep it all down. He settles once the brunt of it is taken, catching his breath when Y/N pulls free and tucks himself away.

“Come on, little bird,” Y/N says, offering a hand to pull Dick up to his feet. He wipes the back of a hand against his lips, still flushed with colour beneath Y/N’s wandering gaze. “There’s a range in the back where we can try this one out. I think we could even fit you beneath the counter if you aren't inclined to watch.”

[garrettwrites]

Warning: discussions of homophobia; extremely negative rant over a popular lgbt book.

Post context: I waited a decade to read a certain retelling book that focuses on the development of an lgbt couple, one which has been discussed over the centuries. I'm doing my best to censor its title and characters, so this post doesn't show up in the tags for people who genuinely love this story. The title, one I now view as overrated, is something along the lines of a song about a certain popular greek hero with long blond hair and a particularly fragile heel. I wanted to read the original, the Iliad, first. I was so excited... and finally, I read the Iliad and other classical texts, I studied ancient history, and I was finally in the mood to start, paired with good knowledge of the characters that would feature in it AND the historical context... Only to find out I shouldn't have waited. 14/15 year old me would have loved this. Current me cannot. I find most reviewers must have either been high while reading, or have taken this book as teenagers, because there is no way an adult over the age of 25 with some degree of reading experience would have not seen the glaring problems with this book.

Disclaimer, if you care - I have no problem with story alterations. I can be critical of them, sure. But even that won't stop me from enjoying something. I think Percy Jackson should have followed a more greek setup, and I don't particularly fancy some of the worldbuilding choices, but those books were and still are among my favourite fantasy stories. Even though they're for children. Even though I've read Tolkien. I'm no elitist, nor do I believe shit can't be changed to make a compelling story. What I do have a problem with is how you present information, and how you distort it.

For instance, if you wanted to write a story about Ariadne and her godly husband set in the year of 1850 for some reason, and make opium play a role? I think that's a fucking weird setting. But it could work, if you stuck true to what characterises them, their relationship, and had a story with a beggining middle and end that tries to show something.

Going back to the retelling that inspired this "rant review". I'll let others more qualified than me to talk about the sexism. What shocked me here was the gay lovestory that reads so homophobic in how cliché it is that it hurts.

This story reads as "when you're so progressive you gotta turn a gay couple made up of two masculine, warrior like, war drowned men into "the hot warrior and his healer who hates fighting" so it fits into (the already sexist/misogynistic) heterosexual couple role".

Because god forbid you have a gay couple where you actually need to deconstruct masculinity without villainizing it. God forbid you actually need to write men into a gay story. God forbid these men are not good, and you need to get into their complexity. God forbid the pov character, who is written as a love struck maiden, has a life outside his strong warrior that helps contextualise his love for him.

Listen. Feminine men are amazing. Gay feminine men are too. I have plenty of original characters that fit within these labels. What I do not do is turn two ancient greek warriors into an early 2000s seme uke yaoi dynamic where one of them is a fragile maiden war tent housewife and the other a very hot but detached strong soldier god man. This is not the story to do that. And even if you play with gender roles and have a man take a more "womanly" role, it's not enough to just genderswap - a character is still badly written regardless of wether they're male or female.

If the housewife character here was a woman, I guarantee everyone who praises this book would be losing their marbles. A woman with no personality outside her lover? Afraid of fighting, of standing up, of speaking up, and this never changes? Who becomes a healer not because she studies it, but because her fragile soul has no other option? Who is passive as all hell in the story until the author remembers she has to die in an impactful manner to trigger her male love interest? That is two dimensional and no way to write a girl, and it's not suddenly okay just because this girl has a dick and is a him.

Yet cause it's gay it's okay to write such an insipid character. Praised even. Which is made even worse, because the original version was a man who yes - indeed - was kind to others yet an absolute beast on the battlefield. Who had opinions and gave counsel. This is not even an original character - I wouldn't criticise an original character as harshly, but this author changed a fighter with incredible skill, who killed a son of a god and was a hero in his own right, into this. A character who yes, was kind and beloved. But touched by war regardless. A character who was loved by those around him, but in this book is ridiculed by these very same people.

Why do you think that is.

And no, trying to make the story more anti war is not an answer. The Iliad is anti war. The Iliad literally comments on how war corrupts what it touches, how it fucked up the lives of everyone involved. This is not a modern take on an old story, because the old story in question already talks about it.

But what can I expect, here. I could call this a work that doesn't know how to write gay men without adhering to (already dated even for straight people) gender roles... but truth is? Author doesn't know how to write women either. The moment you unironically think Helen of Troy is just a vain little hot chick you should not be allowed to write an Iliad retelling, me thinks.

Oh, and let's not get into the fact both main characters are meant to be gay. They're not bisexual. Yet this book - a GAY ROMANCE - is not shy about shoving straight sex scenes onto you. Sex scenes with really no purpose, for they're never brought up again later, and have no story impact.

I am not kidding. Character A gets D pregnant, Character P barely reacts to it, and when D gets upset at P for whatever reason THE TWO OF THEM HAVE SEX TOO. NOTHING AS GAY AS FUCKING THE WOMAN IMPREGNATED BY YOUR BOYFRIEND, UH?! And it's never brought up again! Nobody forces Character P into this yet he willingly goes? Excuse me, if you wanted these characters to have sex with women so casually, why not just make them bisexual and open to banging outside their relationship?

It reads as so disgusting, to have an author clearly lean into a soulmate trope, then just pull some of the most uncomfortable to read sex scenes ever outside that soulmate couple (I love purple prose. Purple prose is probably the only reason I didn't hate this book - the writing was beautiful. But the way the sex with Character D goes... good lord it's written in such a puke inducing way). I'm not against poly in books, what I am against is leaning into monogamous tropes for a gay couple, where you write neither of them as bisexual (which, btw, bi-erasure of the original characters) but then have them bang outside their relationship EVEN when nobody is forcing them to. Never have I read a gay book where straight sex is pushed forward so much. And it's not just even weird for the gay couple, it's also written in a really odd way for the women involved.

"Oh you just don't get the theme! It was out of pity! It was-" turn this into a straight romance and tell me, with a straight face, that this story is well written. Bad character development, bad usage of tropes, terrible pacing, and the use of sex outside the main romance purely for reader self insertion (for it contributes with nothing but shoddy erotica, in a book supposedly about AxP) should not be excused just because a book is gay.

Honestly. "Let people enjoy things" well I propose let me be a hater. I went above and beyond to block the book and character names, let's hope it's enough. But I'm against not criticising things just because they're diverse. It's 2024. There's plenty of authors writing good stories with marginalised people.

And let's talk about LGBT+ worldbuilding, shall we? In the beggining of this book - set in Ancient Greece by the way - it's stated men could take male lovers on the side. Then it's not brought up again, until later a woman tells P many married men take lovers on the side. This girl was originally a sex slave by the way, and here she gets Stockholm Syndrome and falls for P. But then another character tells P he's too old to be into men? So, which is it? It's not even a thing about ancient greek men having that thing where it was accepted for an older man to be sexually involved with a young boy, because here the problem brought up is P being too old, not his lover being too old too.

Oh, and the love interest's (A's) mother. She hates their relationship. We are told she hates their relationship because P is mortal and she doesn't want a mortal to be with her son. Yet later on she arranges a marriage between her son and a MORTAL woman. So is the problem really mortality, or homosexuality?

Why is there modern day homophobia in a story that many praise for historical accuracy?

I honestly hate how people care about representation at the cost of quality. It is mind boggling to me that a woman in this century wrote a book more homophobic and misogynistic than greeks almost 3 thousand years ago did.

[byou-shin]

hi! ive liked your aesthetic and simstyle for a while and i was wondering if you could give tips or sort of walk thru how you make sims? like the face, makeup, skin details, etc. i have trouble making my male sims look as pretty as yours😭 thank u in advance!

Oh thanks so much for the interest! (ㆁᴗㆁ✿) I'm actually surprised people likes my simstyle....

---- How I make my male sims ----

Let's make this handsome guy with me~

NOTES :

all my male sims (masc or fem looking; Adam, Xion, Moa) are made in masculine frames

I don't use alpha skin, but skin overlays. I find it easier to layer makeup and skin details

all of these are my personal preferences, so back to you again for which you want to take from me

Tutorial undercut

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One - choosing skin overlay

First thing I always be choosing skin overlay. I always use Obscurus skin, sometimes Darkstone. I don't like cartoonish looking, but I don't make it way too realistic, so I like it in between realistic and animate. I choose other skin details very later.

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Two - head size & body propotions

a.

After it I choose body preset. After it I will using the EA slider on left whether make it like I want to.

So.. I do really think that EA makes the head size big lol. So I will resize the head using the slider on forehead from afar (zoom out), then make it "slim" by drag the slider to center (still zoom out). Most of the times I max it, but there are sims that I made a liiiiitle bit wider.

See what I mean, right?

b.

If the sim is not tall enough or too short for the character I want to make, I will slider it to using slider in the back of leg

I also slider the back so the sim doesn't have a hunchback. Then usually I will slimmer the neck to max

For fingers I also slide it smaller according to which kind of sim. If I want to make it fragile and delicate, I will slider it to max. If I want to make it masculine still, (or slender) I will slider it until I got the good result I want.

I don't really pay attentions to feet sizes lol, sometimes but rarely, I will slide it smaller or bigger.

c.

Body reshaping is up to my liking actually. Making the shoulders wide or not, it's depend on the sim itself too afterall. So i don't know what to write (u_u;). This guy tho, you can see what I made him like what in introduction post

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Three - choosing eyebrows & face presets

I do this freely actually, depends on the character itself. There are no differences choosing between masc and fem male sims. All is back to the character, even the jaw and chin presets. I do all that in sliding proccess (making it look feminine or masculine). I use both EA Presets or cc creators presets.

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Four - eyebrows & face features shaping/sliders

Actually the process is -> chose preset for one feature -> shape it -> chose preset for another feature -> shape it, but ye lol :3

a.

For eyes, I always slider them smaller, usually max or near to max. Depends again. Sometimes I imagine few sims to extra eyelids tape that makes eyes appear really big (see : Taiga & Asakusa).

If you notice it, in this post my sims have different eye sizes

b.

For nose, usually I will make bigger or smaller as I like (depends on character). But the important is to keep the ratio of the face nicely. Don't make the nose too high or too low. There should be enough gap for lips and nose.

*btw I did the change of skin color after hand reshaping

c.

For eyebrows, is as I said above. Also, it's all depend on the sim face and the makeup look (especially for my vkei sims), so idk what should I say (*´・▿・)ゞ

d.

For mouth, i always make it smaller a bit using the slider on corner of mouth (face zoom out), and make it wider as needed (face zoom out). I always make my sims have relaxed mouth, not frowning but not smiling either. Zoom in shaping is also used of course.

e.

For chin, cheeks, jawline etc. Pay attention to it. I slider it little by little as needed. Chin doesn't have to be small. But for this guy, I made it a lil bit smaller. See the chin or jaw shapes in this post.

f.

Important!! I always size up or down(? the head until it have nice ratio with the teeth. (zoom out face)

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Four - choosing skin details (face & body)

Honestly I do this freely.... if it fits then it fits... lol. Oh also in this part, if I think I should change the skin overlay, then i do it.

a.

Eye details -> if the skin overlay has no eyelids and I want the sim to have it, i'll give them eyelids cc. If I want the sim has eyebags I will give it. Just tiiiiny bit detail. Eyelids cc I use is from Dalsuk and Obscurus. Alsooo, this one is important, I use sclera cc too. I also use eyedepth sometimes.

Also katrina-y eyesocket is good. Sometimes i use it. (See: Xion & Asakusa)

b.

Nose mask/details -> I use nosemask from Obscurus and ddarkstone, faeesih. Depending which suit the best. Not much given to the nose actually.

c.

Mouth details -> i use mouth/smile mask(? from miiko and pralinesims (not always, only if needed). This guy used from miiko

d.

hairline -> I use from setsuki (this time I forgot to gave him hairline but it doesn't show since the hair was covering..

f.

body details -> it depends on the character.. (again). I recommed moonchildlovesthenight abs mask if you want to make muscular sim. This guy though, I didn't add anything to body details.

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After reshaping face features and add skin details~ I really like the nose.

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Five - makeup

How should I describe this part? ( ;´ - `;) it depends on the sim itself. What do you want them to be? But I prepared two option

One is "heavy" look type, like.. some neo-vkei bandmen (I was trying to imitate one of Shiyu from Ashmaze makeup :'D. I need more makeup cc..). But you can also look at my other sims. "Heavy" makeup will carry the atmosphere the sim gives. Take look at Nozomi in this post. He looks mysterious, dark and gloomy.

I will list the makeup cc used, but I'm too tired to link.. zzzzzz

So when i saved this guy I actually deleted the first makeup look... I forgot to add the eyelashes back again..

[BBSims] blush1 RemusSirion_Lipstick_195_Hydra JIUJIANWU 晕染眼影 [PARISE]SelenaEyes(UNNATURALS)

Two is natural beauty type of way. Fresh look. The type to wake up with perfect face, even he was drooling in the sleep. (still depends on the sim characters! In this case, he's the type of people who only uses concealer to hide the face "imperfections").

Makeup cc used.

obscurus_lips_N12 ddarkstonee_eyelashes_N5 [baekbobohu] 04Eyes

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Other tips

Give your male sims eyelashes! Big or not, natural or not.

Use every prossible sliders that is available!

Slide the pupil to imagine them wear big ass contact lens :D (See: Taiga & Asakusa)

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DONE~

whew,, this took me at least 7-ish hours...

so yeah.. I...... hope this helps...?

^_^; .....................