#or either of their mental health

[spenjelly]

So does like… cps not exist in dp?

Cause like.

…

As someone who grew up with the threat of cps. I feel like a mandated reporter ought to have had smth to mandatorially report. Even if they didn’t know about Danny’s alter ego.

Also the fentons are totally fake scientists who know nothing about the scientific process or how to properly form theories and experiments.

[thebibliosphere]

Speaking of therapy, I say, as though we're old friends, and you're not a stranger trapped in this metaphorical elevator with me and you can hear the suspension wires starting to fray.

I've been doing a lot of work recently that's focused on imposter syndrome and the feeling that no matter how well or how much I do, I'm not good enough. That I'm somehow tricking everyone into thinking my work is actually good.

Some days it's a minor niggle in my head that I can gentle and soothe with logic and affirmations. Or smother, depending on the mood. Other times it's loud and all-consuming and the mental anguish it causes me is so real I can feel it twitching in my muscles. This desperate fight-or-flight instinct with nowhere to go and nothing to fight but myself.

Anyway, because I'm several types of Mentally Unwell™, I was switching between workshop sheets ahead of next week. Filling in different forms. (Trying to get a good grade in therapy) And I got my "recognize your harmful ADHD coping mechanisms" worksheet mixed in with the "you're not actually lying to people, you just feel like you are because your brain is full of weasels" worksheet, and seeing them side by side made something go topsy turvy in my head, and I just had to sit and breathe for a couple of minutes until the urge to scream passed. Because it clicked, it all suddenly clicked.

The reason the imposter syndrome workshops and therapy sessions aren't sticking was because I do routinely trick people into thinking I'm someone I'm not.

Because I'm masking my ADHD for their convenience.

I've always known there was something wrong with me. My neurotypical peers made it abundantly clear I didn't fit in or was failing in some way I couldn't see nor remedy, no matter how hard I tried.

So I compressed myself into a workaholic box of hyper-competence in the hopes they'd stop noticing the flaws and exploit like me instead. And then subsequently lived with the daily fear that if they looked too close, they'd realize I'm a monumental fuck up with enough personal baggage to block the Suez Canal.

If you ever need someone to burn themselves to ashes for your comfort and convenience, I'm your gal.

Or I used to. Until I had a bit of a breakdown, and the rubber band holding my brain together snapped and pinged off into the stratosphere, never to be seen again.

Unfortunately, the trauma of living like that didn't also fuck off and instead left a gaping maw where my personality ought to be, so now I get to deal with that aftermath.

And it's that aftermath that's affecting the imposter syndrome shit. Because yes, I am hyper-competent and good at what I do-- but it doesn't feel real because that is how I mask.

And the truly frustrating thing is I am good at what I do. I am not pretending. I worked hard to be good at this. It just feels like I'm dicking around because 90% of my personality turns out to be trauma masquerading as humor in a trenchcoat, and having people genuinely like something weird I'm doing is so foreign my brain has decided it's just another form of masking.

I'm pretending to be a good author so people will think I'm a good author, and my brain thinks we are in Danger of being found out. We are in Danger, and writing is Dangerous because then people will know I'm Weird and not whatever palatable version I've presented myself as for their NT sensibilities.

Like the neurotic vampire with a raging praise kink wasn't an obvious giveaway.

Anyway. I got nothing else. Thanks for listening.

I'm going to go be very normal in another room and not stare into the abyss of my own soul for a bit.

[knight-says-rollout]

“how would it work if Cybertronians had disabilities” “What if there were disabled Cybertronians”

THERE ARE

THERE ARE

loosing my mind at how some things that are So good can be So niche why can’t we just be a hivemind

Just one example, my favorite example, is:

Shattered Glass Soundwave!!!

He’s gone through Multiple reformats varying between with his consent and,,, not. The latest of which took place when they didn’t have many materials

So they used half earth metals half Cybertronian ones

As it turns out? Those two things don’t mix very well. His joints are Horrible. They lock up randomly, the worst of which being the door to his tape deck.

He physically isn’t able to dock his cassettes reliably because they might get stuck in there.

What does he do to fix this? So glad you asked!! He has his own assistive aids, in this case: a portable external carrying case

It was made and personalized to work specifically for him and his situation

I love him

[artuurle]

DUUUUUUDE YOU MADE A SOCIAL BLUNDER- into the oil vat with you.

[tianhai03]

hi hello long time no see and happy halloween everyone. have some michael myers doodles🔪

[chemblrish]

5 December 2024

I've made some minuscule progress on electrochem - I still don't like it but maybe I won't always hate it...? I'm feeling a little sick today but managed to take some notes for the upcoming chromatography final. Hopefully it'll just blow over and not turn into a more serious sickness, but I'm still staying home tomorrow, even if only to keep my germs to myself lol

[cursoulla]

twiddling my thumbs, i realized in ways i rlly do prefer 2010 Nier over the remake. but ofc, i love them both very much. just … smth about the 2010’s. there’s so much charm. i also think nier (adult to be exact) and kainé just look quite nice, even if the faces are a little goofy. and the piss filter + maximum grittiness is peak.

[nicollekidman]

the thing with chappell is that it’s important to be principled, it’s admirable to be outspoken, it’s a good thing that she’s saying what she’s saying in the space that she’s in. but you can’t be those things and also unprepared and unable to take care of yourself when your chosen profession is Public Person. i’ve never disagreed with anything she’s said but if she keeps taking it this hard then her team needs to figure out a way to change the way she currently operates otherwise her career is going to be short and have longterm damage

[moeblob]

Ruining Hank's life with one simple introduction (for the fourth and not final time).

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Ngl I find the idea that killer smells bad (even though he canonically smells good for some reason) just because people think it’s funny or something—or they wanna say “evil bad serial killer inherently ugly and smelly” or “grown man can’t take care of himself haha”—or they want to say he has bad hygiene without acknowledging the reasons why he would (dissociation and lack of identification with his physical form and appearance, his apathy that makes it hard to care enough to even get out of bed, being overworked half to death and constantly being so exhausted he literally faints than falls asleep and that’s only for as long as he’s allowed to sleep, feeling like he’s not even real or alive sometimes—that he is a thing, and a thing does not need or deserve food or a shower and has no need for looking good or put together—feeling he doesn’t deserve anything good) and the fact that—as a trafficking victim—his lack of access to the means to take care of himself is either completely outside of his control or he has to prioritize what is most important to him (something to drink, or brushing your teeth?) or even acknowledging the fact that he could very well have to earn access to things like a shower or a toothbrush depending on the Nightmare interpretation—kinda weird.

[ashethewitch]

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

i haven't watched mha in its entirety so correct me if i'm wrong but bakugou started off as a good example of how privilege can turn people into absolute assholes.

because guess what? bakugou doesn't have a tragic backstory. he doesn't have abusive parents or a dead lover or a torturous childhood. he was, in fact, the "gifted child". people constantly praised him for having such a powerful quirk. his parents seem decent enough. there is no inkling of trauma there, just a man who was so used to being on top that he developed a huge inflated ego and hubris.

and this would have been a good critique of how privileged people often take their experiences for granted, and feel threatened when minorities actually stand up for themselves or gain some attention (see: cishet people complaining about how they didn't get a "straight pride month").

but then the author went and ruined it by not addressing that narrative at all and instead coddling bakugou and having all the other characters put up with his violent tendencies. i don't care if he apologized to midoriya, the fact that it took the author so long to even think of it is bad enough. and the fact that the teachers never try to stop bakugou from bullying the other students, and he apparently goes right back to being an asshole after the apology.. yikes.

there was so much potential to make him interesting character and to address a common social issue, but of course you had to prioritize fanservice instead.

[star-mail]

Hi! I just wanted to say I love your virus shen jiu AU. I'm having severe withdrawals from my antidepressants and my emotions are everywhere but you've made me smile with your art and I just wanted to say thank you! I'm so happy that I get to see your art 🥰💙😊

aa thank youu !! im happy it helps ! even if its just a little bit :D

i still have more ideas for them so you'll have more of the moral support angry man !

i hope everything turns out alright <3

[shouts-into-the-void]

I don't know if I can properly articulate the deep disgust I have for how "ace/aro people can still have sex and/or relationships" and "asexual/aromantic means little-to-no attraction" have been co-opted by non-aspecs in order to dismiss and ignore those identities, not even just in cases to justify shipping characters.

[bigcatbulges]

Source - luodejun

(Artist's Pixiv)

[alecodys]