#or alternatively: 'i fucking hate you' 'i love you too'
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omg can you speak more to your latest post about the reverse happening in 1980, I’ve never about the coherence of the narrative actually :O
Yeah an alternate universe would be crazzyy because our main narrator and star witness of the Beatles would be resident shit stirrer … John Lennon.
John
Fucking
Lennon.
The thing with Paul is that he’s kept to a pretty consistent narrative for the past 40 years or so: John broke up the Beatles cause he wanted to move on, army buddies, they loved each other etc. You can criticise it (I certainly do), but it’s coherent. It’s also one that has allowed John grace and promoted love and community as a core message, something that the other last surviving Beatle Ringo is more than happy to support. It works, we get it, it's a good message in many ways.
Whereas John … wooo boy. The only idea we have of what John would have been like is the 70s where he couldn’t even make a narratively coherent sentence.
If you take his comments and put them together, the Beatles break up was because the guys were blokes he got bored of but also the temple he loved too much but also a marriage that had to end but also a mistake in many ways. Simple, right?
And who was Paul again? Oh, well he was his closest friend ever but also someone he was never very close to and a genius but also artistically dead and yeah, he talks to him often but hasn’t spoken to him in a decade and could talk about him for days but also never thinks about him and is his dear one but also a straight and his ex-coworker who he didnt really work with much … wait no fiance/brother that he would do anything for. Whatever emotion John felt at that moment was his new forever truth/cope and that was the shit he was sticking to on record for those five minutes.
And that’s John in normal factory mode. Now imagine the nuke that would be losing Paul, his Paul. Imagine every extreme feeling and every defense mechanism under the sun all going off at once and right in the interviewer's face like a deranged grief firework show. Then the added mess of Paul being seen as a saint and Paul the person not being there to reality check John’s view of him … chaos. On top of all that, if Yoko is right and John did contemplate an affair with Paul, you think he wouldn’t have spouted that at some point AMONGST OTHER THINGS WE DON’T KNOW ABOUT?
Trying to work out the whole Beatles saga would be like trying to find Bigfoot but the compass is pointing in every direction and through several detours through an inexplicable amount of orgies, scandals and psychosexual drama.
Who were the Beatles? God knows, apparently only the best band ever of bffs/coworkers who were so overrated and boring that John couldn’t wait to leave/never wanted to quit. Who the fuck was Paul McCartney? Duh, the most beautiful perfect wonderful genius man who had ever lived, one of the great loves of John’s life whose memory will stalk his dreams and waking hours until his dying day and has seances for on the reg. Oh he's also a sheep fucking devil who was hated and who intentionally and maliciously slept with half of London and wrote 'nogoodsongsshutup' in an evil plot to trick John to make music with him until Yoko freed him from his spell. What was their relationship? ????????? (okay maybe not everything would have changed lol but we would have so many more details on John’s side). There’d be no message from the Beatles tale, no story, no cohesion. Just a free-for-all pile of disparate tales of love, hate, treepanning and heartache to sift through.
In any case, I would love to see the madness that would be their version of Beatles tumblr.
#Watching John try to cope would be excruciating#but also a rollercoaster ride from start to finish#im pretty sure John would have come out in the 80s/90s#and took Paul with him#regardless of Paul's actual sexuality or inclinations#also ooooh he and/vs Linda#the beatles#john and Paul#There's an alternative universe#would love to compare notes with that universes fandom#Submarine Postbox#anon#ask#ask me anything
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I just binged your Challenges of raising a demon in a day and I love how wholesome it is <3 Your last entry was great too. Like when Al tossed reader off the bed XD...can you ppplllleeeaaaassssseee write it from Alastor's POV?
Thanks, much love!
Hey again Anon 🙂
sounds really interesting so let's try it lol
...
It was approximately 1 am at the Hazbin Hotel by the time Alastor managed to walk into his shared suite to find the lights in the bedroom off and that you had already put your fawn to bed in the ajoining room. The you shaped lump on the bed stirred slightly so he quickly, but silently, made his way to the bathroom to rid himself of the day's stench.
A heavy sigh huffed through his nose as red chunks of viscera easily melted away from his skin in the hot shower. Knowing you'd disprove, he had only told you that he'd be away into the late evening on overlord business in the city and to not wait up for him. Truth is that he went to hunt down the cretins that had whistled and made lewd remarks about you a day earlier. He found out from Niffty, who had accompanied you to the grocery store, and it had made his bood boil.
No one may talk to The Radio Demon's mate in such a disrespectful manner, though he was more than willing to make examples should anyone need reminding.
Coming back to the bedroom, Alastor took a moment to look down onto your beautiful visage laying surrounded by a halo of your curly hair. Your face was completely serene and he could see how well the thin nightgown clung tightly to your more endowed features. He felt, as he always did in these quiet moments, a strong sense of pride that this goddess had accepted his proposal to mate.
Your husband slid into the crimson sheets and leaned over to gently brush his fingers over the wedding band on your slender finger, however, you stirred again and turn away from him on your side. Now that he could clearly see your curves, Alastor couldn't stop himself from reaching out to drag his claws slowly down your side to better feel your plush shape.
But it still wasn't enough.
He found his arms slipping possessively around you as he settled his body close to the soft skin of your back and inhaled your neck. An excited smile cut into his face as the smell of pomegranate and cedar wafted from his wife directly to his crotch. God, you always smelled delightfully of nature. Sweet and dignified, yet wild and unpredictable.
It didn't take long before his excitement made itself physically known and he snapped away his confining clothing, so that, his entire body could press against his beloved doe. You awoke from the feel of his alternate head standing at attention and eagerly sought his lips upon turning in his arms. Alastor felt hands wandering ever downward until you grazed his pelvic bone with a sigh when you understood that he hid nothing from you. He couldn't help but smirk at the blush on your cheeks as your doe eyes looked into his own.
You were still so adorable and his heart skipped a beat when you whined for another kiss ❤️
Alastor, mind fogged by loving lust, completely melted into his mate's sweet sounds and needy touches as he happily reciprocated. You had begun straddling him as he had finally had enough of your nightgown and began to thread it over your stomach when you suddenly froze.
He didn't understand why you whipped your gaze away from him until his blood deprived ears picked up the sound of a pacifier. He's ashamed to admit that he panicked and immediately pushed you off his lap, however noticing that he was too forceful and his goddess was yeeted over the bedside.
But before he could ask if you were alright, the tiny deerling intruder had already began climbing her way up onto the bed.
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Ffffuuuucccckkkkk!
He was explicitly aware that his body was completely uncovered still, except for the blanket that did little to hide his persistent arousal, and quickly snapped on a set of pajamas.
"E-Evie, my darling.", he hated how his voice trembled, "What is it that brings you here so late?"
His only answer was a weak whine as his daughter rubbed her tear stained cheeks, but his instincts picked up on how her ears were folded back and she slightly folded in on herself to seem small.
"Was it another nightmare, sweetheart?", Alastor knew which one and had experienced it himself several times. Deer demon often dreamt of predators lurking around them and of being eaten alive if caught. He could only assume it was because prey animals needed to stay sharp even when asleep. Though, his heart broke for his daughter just the same and he was about to take her into his arms when you had crossed the room to do the same.
In the end, the Radio Demon didn't mind falling asleep wrapped around the two most important people in his life. In fact, he had never felt more at peace than when holding his girls and knowing they were protected in his arms.
...
If this Anon is who I think it is, then I'm pleased to have spent a little extra time on your request and I appreciate you taking the time to send me these asks. 🙂
I really hope you enjoyed reading!
-SSPR
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fuck this shit
have my voice of the broken
and please ignore how elementary my art looks
it's not the full design unfortunately, but a little guy is a little guy, I hope. + the original pencil-and-paper lineart.
now I was gonna go by a specific order, like starting from voice of the hero and all, but broken just resonated with me too much and I thought we could make a pretty neat design out of him so there we have it.
okay I have quite a bit to say about him
come on, the fact that he's the most like me out of all the stp voices surely says something. tower route isn't exactly how my very first playthrough went, true, but once she beat the ever loving crud out of me and the rest of the route unfolded
I had to do a double take he's so real wtf
everything Broken says is something that has definitely passed through my mind at some point or another, especially when it came to a few relationships of mine. the way he just defaults to surrendering. taking the easy way out, the ONLY way out, which is in fact only digging yourself deeper into the problem. somewhere in your subconscious, maybe you know this. but what other choice do you have? she's above you in every way possible. don't you want to please her? isn't this how it's all supposed to go? and, besides, you don't want to taste the alternative.
defiance can't be an option anymore. it's a path fraught with danger and fear and the Broken is blindly submissive because it's the only thing he can be. he can't let himself think like a person or feel like a person or even be a person anymore if it's all just going to get taken away from him.
maybe he's bitter. maybe he hates the world. maybe he wants to let himself feel something that's not simply her, and her, and her.
but it's too risky, too dangerous. and it's so much 'easier' to just...not. just do what she asks, because there's a course of action put before you, and you won't be hurt if you do what she says. and you don't want to be hurt. and everything she's already doing to hurt you is so much better than everything she CAN do if you defy her.
and she loves you. in this twisted, unbalanced, unfair way of hers, she loves you. call it love because you don't want to know what else it can be.
you hate this love. it suffocates you. it drowns you. it seeks out the cracks in your soul. it enters them. it expands them. but it's the only thing left in there anymore.
it may look like a choice when you reciprocate it in the same unjust way. it's turned against you and you're just blocking off your escape, that's what they see. but what does the Broken see? safety. protection. an escape from whatever she can and has thrown upon you if you don't.
you can have "whatever you want" at the cost of a "you."
I feel so bad for him, but I can't help but feel that I...am him. Just 'choosing' to submit and keel over and accept your comfortable little prison is kind of real. It's 'choosing' safety and sloth at the cost of my autonomy, but since when had it even been a choice? external circumstances nudge you towards a corner. your own willpower, or rather lack thereof, backs you further into that corner. the Broken is too familiar.
and yet the way he always makes it a point to hear others out. he empathizes. he soothes. because he doesn't want them to be Broken like he is, or rather, he's the only other one who's just as Broken and he knows how much it sucks. to be at war with yourself all the time yet you yourself are stuck and stagnant and unmoving in everything you know you hate as much as you try to pretend you love. everything you do, every second you live, as wrong as it always feels. he wishes for a choice where he has never had one himself and he can, in a way, live that choice through others.
maybe I'm just projecting idk
fyi there's a reason I gave him that particular hairstyle. it's tied together and weighed down with two teardrop-shaped ornaments. like how he's so restricted and it's heavy, it's so heavy, being sad all the time is a bitch and you can only be tired. yet the braids are still ornate. still straight and silky smooth, still beautiful. but what then? and what if a few strands threaten to escape? it means nothing, it's still what it is. helplessly fixed in place, but who would think about it.
#stp#slay the princess#voice of the broken#vot broken#slay the princess fanart#stp voices#stp textpost#stp analysis
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Fitz' loved ones going "is anyone going to inflict unimaginable trauma on that boy??" and not waiting for an answer
#alternative caption 'scenes that make my blood boil'#we just brought back this teen from death and he's obviously scarred let's hurt him more for funsies#Fitz has 0 male role models that don't fuck him over bc of their own issues - Patience please come back i miss you#chade 'if i was used for decades and took it happily you should too' fallstar#i won't even touch burrich's deal bc he's happy that fitz is alive but still resents him for calling out his flaws#verity 'i gave mind and body for this kingdom why shouldn't you too? farseer#the fact that hipersexuality as a sa trauma response was explained chapters before and Fitz accepted being with Starling bc he felt forged#it's so clear that before that fitz copes with complex emotions w/ substance abuse or getting into wacky situations that force his mind to#only focus on the present for survival#but after being sa'd he escapes that particular shade of trauma by being with Starling and going full hermit#i hate you verity#we shall hunt and eat and sleep and you will heal. oh how i love nighteyes#abuse cw#sa cw#rote#assassin's quest
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Me: All fanfiction is valid!
Also me, gripping my bejeweled chalice in rage: Character x reader is a pox upon the land
#HOT TAKE ALERT#i don't wanna yuck people's yum but i hate that shit#it is fundamentally bad writing because y/n is not a character to be developed#i am also just generally in favor of putting at least *some* veneer of creativity on your wank fantasy#cxr is just mask off fapping#and it feels weirdly low effort compared to the alternatives#i don't think you can really improve very much as a writer if you exclusively write character x reader#it's too awkward to sustain a plot so you just get oneshots and pwp#which have their purpose but you don't want those to be the only tools in your toolbox#not to mention that a lot of the characters read as OOC since we can't see their development of their relationship with y/n#on a personal level it doesn't appeal to me because i don't want to fuck the characters#idk i wonder if cxr is the new mary sue self insert but if so it's less creative than develping an OC!#i'd rather see a million obnoxiously perfect mary sue OCs than a single y/n#fanfic is a labor of love and i wanna see that WORK
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i dont wanna be a dick and act like i have no responsibility in this but after a point dont u think if all you ever say to ur friend is Omg you never make it out why dont you ever come out with us you bail all the time youre such a flake etc. dont u think that person (me) is like. not gonna feel so inclined to. be there
#like. yeah i was bad last semester i get it. and probably i shouldve tried at least once or twice to push thru#but i was so exhausted. and every time they would bring up hanging out it was on my longest days#and when i casually brought this up they were just like Well we have long days too. Okay!#and i love and miss these friends and i know for the most part. or at least think. theyre just teasing#i hate being seen as the flake like any time i do have to be like Oh i cant make that or Shit im sorry i have to bail#i try to offer an alternative???? and they never compromise on that. how is that fair like im not just outright rejecting u all the time#not to mention most of the time last semester it was always gonna be somewhere super easy for them to get home and far from me#im not like constantly holding this against them btw but i feel like they're holding it against me and i dont have any more apologies in me#anyway. that said. if theyre somewhere really expensive and far from me tn and i get out of work early#i. probably will not make it. lol! if theyd be willing to come a little closer to my place to one of the dives or some shit thatd be great#and like im not doing much today until class and work so really like. i WILL try. but i think they could sometimes not go for the most#expensive and inconvenient option as well. and these r all things ill say if it becomes like a problem problem or smth#but rn im not gonna be a dickhead and shit on their plans#but also! ok whatever im not gonna keep going on i just feel shitty im not 100% better from being sick and im just frustrated#about having to fuckign grovel over and over and over. i meant it the first few times now im just like#u could try not to be an asshole to me for five seconds too. like. i am very clearly not someone trying to secretly stop being friends#w yall. things happen#abby talks#and maybe this is an esp sore spot bc like ive certainly had some of you bail on me or be flaky or whatever before. and i didnt throw#a fucking fit to your face about it. probably bc it actually did feel more mean spirited sometimes#OK im sorry im not trying to make my friends sound evil and its mostly just the one and like im working on forgiving her for it cause it#was years ago but also like christ!
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june 27th give it up for june 27th
#purrs#delete later#sure would be an INFINITELY more special and auspicious day if there wasn’t going to be • thunderstorms all day • a budget meeting • two#back to back orientations where i am going to have to take on 2X THE FACILITATION ROLESSSSS 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪 bc we’re doing that now. LMFAOOOOOO#<- and by that i mean splitting up the facilitation so instead of 4 ppl shari ng responsibility for talking AND doing logistics there’s 2#ppl talking and 2 ppl doing logistics. and mutuals need i remind you that facilitating this specific session requires being extremely high#energy and mobile and getting ppl ‘hyped’ and there are 383729473 reasons why that is difficult for me to do in front of 100+ new students#plus three cofacilirators i am scared of / intimidated by for various reasons. im going to be sick soooo genuinely. i HATE this 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣#anyways yeah. today is my one year anniversary and also my first day as an fte so. 🫠 and one year ago today was pretty awful too like my#first day was actually extremely extremely bad and i cried like multiple times every day that week bc it kept getting worse so. love how#things have changed so substantially since then and the things that triggered me on that day aren’t an issue anymore <3 (they are very much#still an issue it’s just the specific people involved have changed bc half the ppl working here including one of my dearest closest#mentors who was deeply involved in that situation have left the university and now it is utterly unrecognizable and every day i wake up in#an alternate universe i know deep down i am not supposed to be in and yet im trapped in it irreversibly and this IS my universe now. lolll 🥰#)) also ik it’s stupid to still be grieving over this but like. the entire way it all went down + the fact that it even did in the first#place and the STAGGGERING consequences of it. are kind of insane. every new development makes me feel more and more like im living in a fake#reality and nothing that is happening is supposed to be happening and im dreaming it all but it’s a bad dream. and idk how to accept#that this is NOT. a dream and that what happened happened and now i have to live with it and stop curling in on myself like a prey animal an#and isolating myself from everyone i love and taking every single conceivable situation badly. like tfw da therapy isn’t working 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#anyways i need to go get ready and practice the fucking 16 page facilitation guide 🙄 see u on the other side lol
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otherwise agreeing with a post except for one line that makes you see red
#i simply think that fashion subcultures should be affordable#like. across the board. lol#which is why i could never wear lolita. that shit gets expensive and the stigma against cheaper alternatives to the big name brands is...#well. fucking nauseating. a lot of the community feels like a pissing contest for how much money you can spend#i understand that it's part of like an escapist hedonistic fantasy but like#escapist hedonistic fantasies shouldn't be restricted to skinny people with money lol#bc let's face it not many brands cater to fat bodies#nor can most fat people find bargains in selling/trading groups because!! it's all skinny people!!#but there's stigma around making your own shit too which!! can be expensive in itself!!#i hate it. i love the style i love the indulgence i love that it enables women to feel beautiful on their own terms.#but that's one part of the culture that needs to fucking die.#anyway. thank you for coming to my tedtalk
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bl3 h2o au is 167 pages condensed [no notes/plans, just pure writing without breaks- the actual document is about 260 pages tho]
ffxv h2o au just hit 145 pages condensed
SOON.
#cruddy rambles#SOON#i should really finish and post chapter 2 i just hate writing the connective tissues lmao#it's done! everything's done! it's regret the chapter! but i just. hnnng. i hate connecting everything for the flow.#i also spend like 7 hours editing when everything's done and i don't wanna >:(#and posting chapter 2 means i gotta post chapter 3 after! and im not done with that one!#fuck!!#instead my brain went: hey. maagho and iwas like shit yeah maagho and also that one alternate ending that's probably eventually going to be#the canon ending because i love it so much#INSTEAD OF. OH. IDK. WRITING CHAPTER 3#do you know how many macarons have been left unbaked. too many!!!#also im totally drawing kingsglaive ravus helping sania study miasma via his old prosthetic [cid cindy and holly make him a new one bc-#the old one was magitek and is implied to have miasma in it which... not healthy!] and this helping her figure out a technical cure for-#ppl who have been infected but not turned yet. compared to luna's magic which ravus doesn't seem to have access to bc not an oracle#because i think it would be sweet if he joined the kingsglaive [BECAUSE HE LIVES] in order to figure out how he's going to-#ensure what Luna wanted wasn't in vain and that includes helping people and healing them [thru aiding sania's research]#and since we're following the episode noctis ending luna lives and they get to meet each other again
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i think im in big trouble
#i hate history so much#i think i once made a post about ''the reason i hate it is because i dont understand it but im getting there and economics is interesting#and politics is too i just hate it because i dont understand it'' bc i genuinely thought so. no i just hate it so fucking much#i have a presentation next week about a current event and i have to answer ''how does this affect canada'' and its gotta talk about either#economics or politics and i know NOTHING about that. literally 0. today this kid got humiliated because his current event was about a#school shooting recently and it was like social psychological soething and no econ/politics and i wanted to die#its gonna be me next week im actually going to cry i hate history guys like. i'd rather physics and thats saying SOMETHING. it also doesnt#help that my history teacher is like. bullshitting everything. he's so smart dont get me wrong. one of the most philosophical and smartest#men i've met but holy jesus fuck he can't teach. he can talk and talk and talk but he doesnt teach you how to get those conclusions and#actually apply them to like stuff. yeah i have to talk about the economy and shit but how do i do that. i can memorize thigns he says but#that's not understanding???? there's an alternate history teacher and im actually going to cry bc hes an actual teacher and he also likes#me very much. (he is literally paying for my physics tutoring...). anyyways that's that.#also at work i won an award for personnel with most customer 5/5 stars#like god i love my job#and today i might or might not have purposely flirted with a man so that he could do the survey that gives me 5/5#lol#produce guy is actually a robot i fear. either that or he genuinely doesn't like me because
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the worst part abt being an adult is that when things go wrong I am the one who is expected to deal with it even if I am not the one that is strictly to blame for things going wrong. what the fuck.
#spam brain#me: ah yes i am moving in july so easy#life: how about you go FUCK yourself and while you're at it suck my entire fucking dick huh#like. like. GOD DAMN IT#i wanted out of this godforsaken city in july i wanted it SO FUCKING BAD and now i have to go around begging the few friends i have#to see if i can crash on their couch for a few months#surprise surprise the answer has been 'no' thus far (which i am not BLAMING them at all but god this whole thing is so annyoing)#i may very well end up having to move to ANOTHER APARTMENT in this godforsaken city BEFORE I MOVE TO TAMPA like????#not what i fucking signed up for#but the alternative is dragging my shit up to ne again and living w my mom and her new fiance for a few motnhs#which is not the WORST thing in the world i love my mom and idc that much abt her fiance he seems fine#but the energy that would take... and i would need to find a new job for like 4 months before i move again.... ugh#plus now i had a date w a guy who is actually cool and actually seems interested in another so like!!! fucking god#THE WHOLE THING IS BULLSHIT. BULLSHIT I SAY. HATE.#wish life was easier but NOOOO that's too much to ask#anyway rant over i'll shut up but i am so pissed abt this whole thing its so unnecessarily annoying istg#non fandom#wish me luck w this whole thing guys please i fucking need it
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nah. fuck kamala. fucking idiots. you people will settle for crumbs if it means the slightest hint of maybe (MAYBE) something helping you. meanwhile it's prisoners being left behind in hurricanes (kamala loves prisons and racism), biological warfare with literal chlorine gas plants blowing up and spreading to 4 states (kamala loves fracking and racism), covid denialism and sickness running rampant (kamala hates public health and loves capitalism and racism) a state that lynched a black man and killed several others (kamala hates black people, wants the death penalty, and is a fucking cop. she's a pig, she loves death and racism), murdering or supporting murderers in the global south (palestine directly, supporting uae in sudan, every sovereign struggle: haiti, cuba, more more more always more always afro, african and/or muslim. she loves domination and racism) a fucking genocide and one of the nastiest most anti human anti palestinian anti black ideology because of america, is the face of the american empire and on top of all that wants republicans to work with her.
if you're so obsessed with imperial colonialism, racial/capitalism and capital exploitation, insane entrenchment and misery then yea say shit like this. can't even make up your mind on what you fucking want in life and now instead of changing shit you want to vote and sit on your ass instead of demanding more and fighting for it. for people to say this shows that NOTHING is off limits absolutely NOTHING. a win fo reither of these people means it is a fucking reward. you want to be a part of that you sick freaks? vote all you fucking want but shut the fuck up about us principled people wanting people to understand the reality of this situation and wanting them to have a little fucking self respect. we cannot put our energy into these evil racist homicidal imperial ghouls; they are killing us. they want us fucking dead. i am a black person i am not an american and i will remain so. that means struggle and it means anger and LOVE. fuck you all. and fuck you for lying it's hella trans people who arent voting for that fucking freak and have remained principled even before 10/7 but if genocide isn't your line (certainly know black american genocide isn't) shut your fucking mouth about shit you don't care or know about.
you settle for nothing now and you'll settle for nothing later. politically impotent intellectually depraved freaks want to call us stupid? get real.
I'm sorry, but I'm just too fucking old to pretend that the presidential ticket of "Person who performed some of the first gay marriages in her state while it was still federally illegal" and "governor who created a trans refuge state while other states were making it illegal to transition" is somehow 'jUsT aS bAd foR QuEer pEopLe' as the ticket promising to reverse marriage equality and make trans healthcare next to impossible.
That is such a monumentally stupid opinion that I'm going to have a hard time believing that you're actually that stupid, and I'll probably just assume you're malicious.
#fuck you#fuck this place#a thot#it's called being fucking principled and knowing that i won't sell my soul for these ppl and call it a day. they are EVIL .THEYRE EVIL.#this country is the biggest ufcking threat to world peace and you wanna scold people about the way they articulate the issue?#we say this because we want people to redirect their energy and LEARN. learn about what's happening and fight. find your local orgs#they may not be great and have issues but connect with people and form your own. read. try to do things online if you can't go outside.#figure out alternatives. read about black people and their resistance about algeria about south africa. get angry. love.#do something ANYTHING but capitulate to this system vote and then be done..........stop trying to convince people and getting angry at us#for refusing to fucking lie. you want us all dead. you hate black people-palestinians-trans ppl (of which someone could be all three)#yea im pissed tf off is this shit happening on this godforsaken website too? this neoliberal drivel. well well well it SUCKS#WE MUST BECOME A MENACE TO OUR ENEMIES
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can I say something controversial?
#I think the trial wasn't preventable because Armand and Lestat's intense love hate beef was too strong for either to wake up and#realize they could both just fight against this as a united front and also put and end to things by literally just#asking Louis what and who he wanted getting verbal affirmation on what he felt#Can't have that though it had to be 'me' and 'he's mine'#not even letting Claudia go fuck off to wherever like it's not their biggest concern what becomes of her#Though this did make another point of contention to not see the forest through the trees#Cause I do really think neither of them are in agreement Louis should die but they aren't exactly helping him because they can't get#their own shit together#Lestat probably doesn't think he deserves to see Louis to talk Armand doesn't want to face up to the truth or possibility of his abandonmen#Armands got his little cooked up idea that they'll just save him at the trail and Lestat's all that's a stupid fucking business plan Louis#wouldn't crawl on back to you after this. Really certain Louis might just choose him or alternatively fuck off.#But Lestat knows Louis can't stay away from him forever so#Though I do think Lestat's more fickle about this whole thing and wants out#But Lestat can't really back down because Armand won't and he won't because the coven won't#And the covens just eating it up because they're getting everything they wanted while the two of them are just miserable#With how TVL goes this telling of events makes some sense in my mind#haven't read the book in ages though but narratively this would be a natural progression i'd think#Like it just culminating into this
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did you know that disney resellers are some of the worst people on the planet and i hope scalpers a very go fuck off and die <3
#i mean this as 'stop hiking up the prices so only middle class people can have silly disney merch'#and i HATE buying licensed things first hand#this goes for big alternative brands too you guys are the fucking worst#i would love to diy shit but buying is so much cheaper#i am very opinionated when it comes to shopping as a lower class plus sized fat person
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the president of the united states: "we need a humanitarian pause"
the president of the united states: [provides israel with more weapons of war]
#this kind of b.s. is why people hate biden#he's better than the alternative but jesus fucking christ#obama was like this too; he was just a better public speaker#this is why I'm an independent#it's no wonder the polls are so close now#and what the fuck is “bidenomics”#not even biden can really tell you what it is#democratic consultants are so fucking out of touch#focus on the voters not yourselves#tell them that you're boring and have spent money on infrastructure#tell them that you support unions and fucking do it (not some halfway pageantry where you fail to support rail workers)#tell them that you're creating jobs in new sectors#tell them repeatedly that you're on their side not the side of the rich#repeat repeat repeat that you're working on reducing student loan debt#talk about “common sense”#I would love to be a political consultant but I wouldn't survive the inbreeding
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#dont read this is just. Venting. the way thats easiest for me to get it all out#not to depressionpost but im so fucking lonely its not even funny#i just would like to be able to feel Loved#which is silly bc logically i KNOW that im loved by my (very small) circle but#object permanence or. I guess emotional permanence or WHATEVER you call it just hasnt worked for me in such a long time#and its so very hard to not lash out and be awful in my misery to the ppl around me whenever that bpd switch gets flipped#ik im overly clingy and annoying and hard to get along with. I love and want to be loved and needed like a whimpering dog. i KNOW this.#and ik it doesnt help that every horrible awful clingy insecurity gets amplified by the abandonment and bullying and hurt ive faced#i constantly feel like ive been left on the curb by my loved ones even though i know thats not whats happening.#like im stuck in last place again and again and again. like im not as good or as cherished as their other people.#Its so hard. it makes me want to say and do awful things bc i feel so Abandoned and I HATE IT!!!!!#i fixate on my loved one and get these possessive and insecure feelings over them and its so UGLY.#it was bad enough in high school but Everything Else Thats Happened has made that problem of mine so much harder to cope with and ignore#train derailed but re: the first point. its so hard for me to actually feel like people care and want me around.#And now ive become too afraid to ask for anything bc of how many times theyve cancelled or forgot or ignored the plans we make together.#like is it a me thing? Am i that forgettable? am i that insufferable? why am i always the odd man out?#ugh#Nothing i said makes sense. But whatever#okay sorry this is just a better alternative than hurting myself so.#i hate being alone. i hate having no support system. i hate being stuck in a traumatic and abusive situation i cant get myself out of.#it gets harder and harder to convince myself to keep going.#every day i wake up feeling so Abandoned that i consider sabotaging every good relationship left in my life rehoming my pets n then kms-ing#haha. 🤟🤟🤟🤟#Its hard dealinh with traumatic personality disorders#while also dealing with perpetual ptsd-triggering and almost complete isolation
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