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sweetsaladpainterranch · 5 days

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First ever fan fic I have ever written, so please don't expect anything great lol but I wanted to give writing a shot after enjoying so many other wonderful creations on here.

Sinner venison is a rare delicacy in Pentagram City so being a doe guarantees you are a target of the carnivores until you meet a certain enchanting lady and strike up an interesting deal that draws the attention of a certain Radio Demon.

***

You Are What They Eat

Chapter 1

Although Hell was indeed a place intended for the worst of souls to be funneled together, there were still territories that required civility among its visitors. Such was Cannibal Town, where the community happily took any opportunity to remind any offending persons of their manners. It was something The Radio Demon quite admired about the sharp-toothed gaggle of cannibal demons; along with their dated fashion and mannerisms.

This understanding is why Alastor excitely stood watching two carnivore demons loudly argue with each other outside of his dear Rosie's emporium. It was bold enough for them to have shown up here in, soiled, tattered clothing, but for them to actually be disturbing the peace with their childish argument. Alastor waited, counting down the seconds until the town had enough of the pair.

"YOU COCKSUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! YOU KNOW I WAS IN FRONT OF YOU!", the tiger shouted, unaware of the crowd beginning to surround him.

The raptor demon fired back, "FUCK YOU! I WAS HERE FIRST, LYING DUMBASS!", also painfully inept towards the now large circle of annoyed townspeople.

The smile on Alastor's face was large and widening as his anticipation climbed for the incoming display of violence. His eyes followed the first strike of a sledgehammer landing against the tiger's left leg, which caused a delicious shriek to be ripped from the assaulted demon. The raptor, however, immediately began to raise his claws in defense only to be slammed to the ground by a group of grinning black-eyed men. Who began chowing down the moment he hit the pavement, which was accompanied by the painful screams of the tiger overcome by the hungry frenzy of his own assailants.

Tempted to join in the bloody revelry, Alastor sighed and made his way up the steps to an already awaiting Rosie. The screams continued to flood the air as he entered his friend's establishment, eager for whatever surprise she had phoned him about that morning.

***One Week Earlier***

You weren't exactly new to Hell, but, being a deer demon, a doe at that, you were a prime candidate for satiating a very limited resource amongst Hell's populace. Sinner venison. Life was, well hell, and you mourned your boring old routine back on Earth as you desperately tried to outrun the shark goons through dingy alleyways and side streets. They yelled which body part they each had dibs on, however, that only made your pace pick up in your fear.

You never thought you'd actually miss your crappy job as a low-paid sanitation worker for a small motel in Georgia that seldom hosted anyone other than loud college students or sleazy men with escorts.

While you were lingering within your memories of the top side, you accidentally ran yourself into a dead-end and spoke a very unladylike curse at your bad luck. Loud footsteps behind you answered the question of whether or not your pursuers had managed to keep up with your deer speed. Fuck my afterlife!

A lone, deep voice spoke up with a dark cadence, "Just turn around nice and easy, little lady. We wouldn't want to over-tenderize you, would we?" The sinister undertone spoken in such a calm demeanor sent unpleasant shivers down your spine.

Still hopelessly staring at the brick wall blocking your escape, you tried to remember the number of times you had escaped these idiots only to be dragged back again and again. On the other hand, you didn't recognize this part of the city so this must be the farthest you've ever made it from Danny's butcher shop. What had that welcome sign you had whirled past say? Carnival Town or maybe Cardinal Town?

Finally turning around, the sharks all grinned in response to your snarl, which was contrasted by your torn clothes and withered appearance, but you did your best to take a fighting stance anyway. You knew you were going to be dragged back to endure more torture, however, you sure as hell weren't going without a fight.

Just before your gang of hunters enclosed upon you, a light and cheerful voice cut through the air, "Excuse me, gentlemen." As all of you turned your attention toward the source of the feminine voice, you couldn't help but momentarily feel a surge of hope. "Could you all please explain why Danny's men are conducting a hunt, and on a poor little thing like her of all people, in my territory?"

You caught sight of a tall woman in a formfitting, floor-length dress and wearing a large-rimmed, feathered hat carrying a red and black parasol. Despite her wide, sharp teeth she looked about as able to fight as you did in your starved and disheveled state. Your hope shriveled up just like that, replaced by fear for this brave, but stupid, stranger.

"Your territory?", the lead shark laughed, "Ha! Sure, a sweet doll like you runs a whole territory.", he scoffed, making the others chuckle. "Now why don't you run along back to wherever the fuck you came from, missy, before we decide to let you tag along to our fine establishment."

Though he was turned away from you, you knew he was dragging his gaze appraisingly over her, "Shit", you thought and knew you couldn't allow another to be caged because of your foolish attempt to escape. "Just go, lady!", you shouted and waved your arms in get away motion, "They're serious! You really don't want to get yourself involved with them!"

Your diversion worked and the men turned their attention back to you and you once again did your best to look as intimidating as possible, but your doe ears were flattened on your head and your tail was standing stiff as a board. Although your vision began to blur from fear and hunger, you continued to look into the lead hunter's eye as your last act of defiance against an inevitable fate.

Suddenly, a surprised shriek rang out into the alley, followed by a spray of something wet and warm. Before the gang could even comprehend what was the cause of the interruption, a red twister of graceful motion cut down the next four shark sinners. The only one remaining, the lead who currently had his large hand wrapped around your arm, took in the scene.

You also looked towards the noise and couldn't believe your eyes as the woman, who you thought had left, smiled manically at him and happily ran a finger over the small sword she had apparently pulled from her parasol.

" CRAZY BITCH! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!"

The tall woman tasted the bloody mess on her finger with a pleased hum, "I just adore shark meat! Haven't had the chance to have it in some time but I guess it's just my lucky day." She smiled like she had just received a nice big plate of her favorite food at a restaurant and only now directed her attention towards the one left.

She raised her sword and pointed it in his direction, aimed at his heart, and fluttered her long eyelashes before calmly answering, "The name is Rosie, charmed to make your acquaintance. However, I'm afraid we don't tolerate that kind of language spoken to a lady here."

She lunged with a smirk.

***

Again my first ever attempt at writing a fan fic, but I hope you enjoyed it! Any opinions are welcome.

XD -S.S.P.R.

#alastor x reader #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel reader x alastor #tumblr noob

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