#or I'm js simply so bad

[deprivedofbraincellsandsleep]

wishing so bad that I was a great writer or artist rn

[lexfoster]

She's asleep in the backseat Looking peaceful enough to me But she's waking up inside a dream Full of screeching tires and fire

[thehouseofurmotha]

Shinsou dating Aizawa's daughter head cannons :)

Pairing: Shinsou x Aizawa!Reader

I'm also working on a soulmate au with Shinsou 🤭 I fear he may be my favorite

• You and him meet when Aizawa asks you to spar with him, as you both have quirks that are less equipped for close range combat. You're in class 1-A too which is the class Shinsou would most likely join when he ends up in the hero course so it just made sense.

• You whoop his ass, he's immediately in love. He thinks you're extremely skilled and talented and pretty much begs you to help train him with your dad.

• Maybe it's because he wants to see you more often, but you don't need to know that.

• You ultimately agree and you and Shinsou pretty muuuuch become besties.

• But this is not enough for this man because he is absolutely enamored with you.

• One day while the two of you are sparing, your father leaves to go get another cup of coffee. And at this point he finally manages to pin you to the ground.

• For whatever reason he decides this is the best time to shoot his shot and is like, "Go on a date with me?" While he's just casually got you pinned to the ground.

• You don't manage to give him an answer before your dad gets back, but after you get up and brush yourself off you look at him and mouth a simple 'yes'.

• He smiles like a madman at this and your father looks at him and asks him what he's smiling about. He quickly goes back to his normal tired resting face with a quick nothing.

• Aizawa def thinks this is weird but he decides not to press any father. He feels bad pressing kids to tell him something they don't really have to.

• You guys go on a few dates before you officially start dating. Your father definitely notices that something about the two of you has changed but he doesn't realize that it has to do with the two of you being together.

• He finds out when he walks into your room while you and Shinsou were supposed to be just hanging out and watching a movie. Which he didn't find odd because the two of you had become fast friends with the friendly competition of sparring. But as he walks into your room to ask the two of you want for dinner he finds the two of you making out.

• He IMMEDIATELY kicks Shinsou out of your guys apartment. He isn't really mad that you guys are together he's just mad that you hid it from him and he had to find out like this.

• You guys have a very long conversation about being safe, and he definitely calls Midnight to handle most of it because he thinks he might just simply pass out from embarrassment. (You as well)

• He tells you he doesn't really care as long as you're happy. But this man does not let Shinsou live it down.

• Bro is fighting for his life during training the next day being worked so hard.

• Shinsou eventually gets back on your dad's good side and he comes over for weekly dinners.

I fear I may have an obsession with dadzawa.. and Shinsou.. I'm simply js a girl though. Anyways I hope you enjoyed :) <3 happy reading!

[clemswinecorner]

Take a break [Harry Lewis/W2S]

Summary: When something's off with Harry, there's probably only one person that can make him feel better: his girlfriend.

Wordcount: 2.1k

Warnings: a bit of anxiety ish and mentioning of a potential burnout. Nothing extremely angsty :)

I'm back! Except not with a driver fic, sorry for these followers. I want to upload more UK YouTube fics so if you like this make sure to follow :))

Main Masterlist

It was Tobi that shot Y/N a text that afternoon. She was sitting in a random café working, rounding off her things before going home, and Harry was somewhere around London recording. Hey Y/N, I think smth is up with Harry. Dunno if anything has been bothering him recently, js wanted to let u know. He acts fine on camera but if ure near, could you hop by? we just finished up the vid, he’ll be in the studio recording the podcast w me josh and Ethan. It didn’t take much convincing, and since she was nearly done, she was in the studio an hour later. One of the production members opened the door, “Hey, I didn’t know you would come by,” the girl smiles at her. “No, wasn’t in the plans, but just picking up Harry,” Y/N explains, walking into the building. When she walks into the studio, Harry is simply listening to a story Ethan is telling, staring into the distance with his mind visibly somewhere else. Tobi spots her before Harry does, greeting her with a subtle nod. She smiles at him as she sits down behind the lights and cameras, out of view. “I know this is a podcast, but I need to pee really bad, can we do a short break please?” Tobi suggests once Ethan is done with his story. He looks at the production members, as Ethan nods in agreement, “yeah, regroup in 10 minutes then. I’ll keep everything rolling, just so you know,” Tobi nods and stands up, walking out the Studio. He gives Y/N a quick smile when passing her, and she stays seated as the boys all relax. “I’m hungry, haven’t eaten much today,” Ethan stands up as Harry pulls out his phone. He nudges the Guernsey boy, “D’you want anything?” To which Harry shakes his head. Ethan frowns but moves away from the desk nonetheless, as Y/N stands up. “Oh, hey, didn’t know you were here!” Ethan says as he passes her. She smiles, hugging him back quickly. “Yeah, I was around, so I figured I’d come by,” she explains. At the sound of the new voice, Harry’s head slowly perks up. A tired smile forms on his face as they make eye contact, with her nodding her head to signal him over. He stands up and walks over to the pair, making Josh look over, giving the girl a quick wave, which she returns. “Hi,” she softly smiles as she lets him embrace her. “Hey, are you okay?” She nods. “Yeah, did you eat anything yet? I heard Ethan just now,” He softly shakes his head as they pull apart, “No, haven’t been too hungry,” he admits, and she sighs with a knowing look. “Don’t forget yourself, Harry. When you’re done, we’re getting some food, yeah. I’ll order it during the recording, and we’ll go pick it up, go home, and have a night us to, yeah. Maybe all of tomorrow, too?” She suggests, and he nods. “Thank you,” He quietly replies, wrapping his arm around her to press a kiss on her hair. 

As they get back to recording the last part of the podcast, Y/N sits back in her original spot. She now finds Harry looking over more often, and she sends him a smile every time. He seemed a bit more relaxed, a bit more involved in the conversations. He was laughing, that stupid half-assed laugh, that made him look too damn cute. She hated it, though— she hated how she could tell he just laughed because of the cameras. Even if he liked the joke, the smile didn’t reach his eyes the way it usually would. Soon enough the recording’s done, and Harry is given the green light to go, the rest of the crew all seeing the tiredness in his body language. As they stand at the car, Tobi has walked out after them to give them a quick goodbye. “See you later bro, take care, yeah?” He simply tells Harry as they clap hands, before the younger steps into the passenger seat. He gives Y/N a proper hug, “Thanks for coming, let me know how he’s doing, please?” She nods as they let go. “Yeah, thanks for texting. He looks pretty overwhelmed, and he didn’t eat much breakfast either, so…” Tobi sighs, as he looks towards the car. “We didn’t really have time to eat, I should’ve pushed to get lunch more,” Y/N shrugs. “Not much to do now. Again, thanks for looking out for him. I’ll see you soon, yeah?” He nods. “Yeah, thank you too. See you Friday,” he mentions, reminding her of the Sidemen’s anniversary party. “See you then, bye Tobi!” She says, stepping into the car. Harry looks up at her with a questioning look on his face, “What were you chatting about?” He asks, dropping his phone in his lap. She looks at him for a second, “Tobi texted me when you were done with the video if I could hop by. He said you acted fine on camera, but something was off, and I was nearly done with work anyway so I wanted to pick you up. He just asked me to let him know if you were okay,” She answers honestly, to which he nods slowly. “Hmm.” A short silence falls between them as she gets settled, looking over at him before turning the key. “Are you, okay?” She asks. He doesn’t reply immediately, fiddling with his phone. “I- I don’t really, uhh, I dunno. I’ve just… It’s weird, I, uh…” He doesn’t seem to find the words, so she puts her hand on his thigh. “That’s okay. You don’t have to talk, we can get home, have some food, maybe a cuddle, and then talk. Or cry, or scream, or say nothing. Whichever, yeah?” He nods as she squeezes his thigh before moving her hand back to the steering wheel. His hands automatically find her body as they pull out the car park, making her smile subconsciously. “Oh, and there’s something else Tobi mentioned, which I almost forgot. We are going to the Sidemen party, which you probably conveniently forgot is this Friday,” she changes the subject, making him groan in fake annoyance.

Y/N collects the food they ordered, and after a short ride with some soft background music, they’re carrying the bags of food inside. “If you want to change, you can do that now, we can watch a movie or some Brooklyn 99. Do you want a drink?” She asks, as he walks towards the bedroom. He nods, “Just a tea please,” he asks, before changing into his pyjamas. She makes them their drinks, making herself an iced tea, and puts them on the coffee table. Walking back to the kitchen to get the bags of food, she sees Harry taking out the plates and cutlery, and smiles at him. “Do you want to watch anything?” He looks at her and shrugs, “Just something quick. Did you watch the race?” He asks, and she nods. “I had it on, yeah, but was working during it. We can watch the race in 30?” She suggests as they sit down on the couch. He nods, leaning over the table to make himself a plate of food. “Yeah, sounds good,” he says, as she finds the compilation of the latest Formula One race. Harry sits closely next to her, thighs touching each other and occasionally leaning backwards, putting his head on her shoulder. 

He was tired, she could tell, and by the time they’d finished the food he was lying on her lap. She softly combs through his hair as the F1 outro played, and she sighs. “Are you alright?” She asks, and he’s quiet for a minute. “I don’t know,” he answered honestly. She motions for him to keep talking, and he sighs. “I’ve just, I’ve been feeling anxious all day and I don’t know why. Didn’t sleep as well either, but that’s not really anything new recently,” he mentions, and she nods. He had been having trouble sleeping recently, falling asleep late and waking up in the middle of the day, unless he had recordings in the morning. “Any reason why? Like, something big happening or a change in something?” He shrugs. “No, not that I can think of. I mean, we have the anniversary coming up and don’t really have anything planned and maybe people will expect something, but that’s not really my doing anyway. I also need to have a video worked out and a more sidemen thing ready by Saturday, but I’ll get that done,” he mentions, rolling his head so he’s looking at her. She looks down at him, looking into his eyes. “I think you should take a break, first, just tonight and tomorrow. No Sidemen business, no YouTube friends, just us. Wasn’t Rosie in Manchester? We could visit her,” she suggests, and he nods. “Yeah, that sounds good,” he softly says. They sit in silence for a bit, thinking about the conversation that just occurred. “If you still feel anxious or weird after that, that’s okay too. We can look into it, if you’ll let me help you, and see what makes you feel better, yeah?” She breaks the silence. He bites his lips as he hesitantly nods. “Hmm. I’m just worried it’s a lasting thing. I’ve got nothing to be stressed about really, people like Simon and JJ are doing way more than I am yet here I am,” he expresses his concerns. “Well, you’ve been doing this for over a decade, baby, and even when you quit uploading you started doing more things for the channel. That and recording not only for the Sidemen but also all of your friends’ channels, plus all the behind the scenes stuff you’re involved in, it’s not hard to be burnt out or overwhelmed,” He nods, fiddling with their hands. “It just feels so unfair to take a break, when I have lots of time off already. I have the one of the easier jobs on the Sidemen channel, you know,” She looks up for a second, thinking about his statement. “Hmm. For you, yeah, but I think Lucy wouldn’t want to switch with you. Just because it’s fun and comes naturally to you doesn’t mean it’s easy, and you don’t work hard,” She explains, to which he nods. “Hmm, I guess that’s true,” he agrees. She shuffles around a bit, and Harry raises his head so she can sit more comfortably. “And like, you have time off, but when do you actually? You’re always recording, or golfing, or on a date with me, which is nice, and you’re busy which is good, and it’s fun, but you know… You need to take care of yourself, have some time for you, as well.” He sighs as he sits up. “Whenever I’m with you is enough. But I do need more time without anything else, maybe,” he admits, grabbing his cup of tea from the table. She smiles at him, “I know you love them, but I know you as well, you’re an introvert. We spend all your other time together, too, which I obviously have zero problems with, but you need your alone time, too,” He looks at her over the rim of his glass. “Don’t be silly, I never need time away from you. Like, I consider nights like this alone time. I can recharge with you,” he sheepishly smiles at her, and she blushes. “I… Wait, that is actually so cute,” She leans against his chest, and he chuckles, wrapping his arms around her. “It’s true,” he simply says, and she giggles. She looks up at him to see him already looking down at her with the same smile still on his face. Despite dating for over two years, it still felt like the honeymoon stage, and the look in their eyes’ says enough. Harry smiles before he presses his lips against hers, and she smiles into the kiss.

Their cups of tea were long forgotten as they get even closer to each other, the kiss filled with love instead of the lust they sometimes were. They both smile into the kiss, just taking in each other's presence, until the sound of the Formula One intro promptly makes them pull away. “Jesus Christ,” Harry just says as Y/N leans into his chest, giggling at the scare. Harry looks for the remote, turning off the video that autoplayed. He looks at her with a loving smile, as she looks up again. “Right, where were we?”

[zealofchronos]

i share ur struggle.. i ACHE for gepard or welt content so hopefully i could request for something like that? im js gonna throw a bunch of ideas and you can choose whichever

relationship hcs (what he’d be like, how does he show his love etc)

sleeping together (take this whichever way you want)

cooking together in the kitchen (im a whore for this stuff idk why😭)

bedroom hcs (kinks, fav positions, literally anything i need it so bad)

KISSING IN THE SNOW W GEPARD😞

anon i hope you know this ask gave me like 5000 braincells. like suddenly i am THINKING. it's so insane how one little ask full of random blurbs gave me so much life to write even just the smallest things.

literally welt and gepard are my two faves rn, i'm fr just waiting for jing yuan to come out. jing yuan my beloved <3<3

but anyway, as for this little ask, i think we'll ease into the hsr content with some fluff ( i am all due for it anyway, i have Not been writing and i also need the fluff because my god does life hit hard ) so sit tight >:)

love and cherishing you ♡ ;; various x gn!reader headcanons

content;- sfw , fluff , headcanons list , how some hsr boys show their love for you ♡♡ , overall just really fluffy because i need toothrotting stomach ache inducing head swirling sweet fluff sometimes... , nothing about getting together but just general hcs on what they'd be like in a relationship , reader is nooooot...? the trailblazer but could possibly be interpreted as such if you squint

characters inc:- welt yang , gepard landau ( includes post-belobog arc content, not extremely spoilery but take note that i chose after the jarillo-vi conclusion to open up more opportunities >:3 )

together with welt yang . . .

welt has lived life longer than perhaps anyone on the express, being from another world and used to living as the first ( second generation ) herrscher of reason, a herrscher that sided with humanity. he didn't expect to get sucked into another adventure, one where he'll meet many companions, see unbelievable sights or even... fall in love.

he's an old soul, yet his heart still has a grand passion for what he does. the fire within him burns, and perhaps, you stoke the flames. a motivation unlike any other to show you the wonders of the galaxy— of every world.

his love is not the most openly shown, an old man can be embarrassed sometimes. especially in the face of his family of the astral express. his affections for you are for you two only. his touches, his words, the little things that make sparks fly are all special and meant for your ears and eyes only. be it in the privacy of his room, or late nights when everyone else is fast asleep, he'll always find a way to make his love for you known when nobody else is looking.

time together with you is always time well spent. he enjoys it perhaps just a little more than going on adventures with everyone. you could be doing anything, and he wouldn't mind simply sitting in silence together with you. it's comforting, relaxing. it's moments like these where he gets to unwind with you. it's essentially a recharge— he doesn't even have to hold you ( but if you'd like that, he'd be more than happy to ).

he used to be an artist— an animation storyboard artist. his skills on paper would definitely outmatch the rest of the crew. he already likes to have his experiences captured in little drawings in his notebook. well, you happen to be one big, long lasting experience. one that he can't wait to see what more comes while experiencing it. you swear that you can catch him gazing at you every other day, and you always see his pencil moving across the papers in his book. inside are sketches of you in all your beauty, how he adores you, even complete with little notes about the things you like.

he wishes to show you the world, all there is to be seen across the entire galaxy. he will be there, to guide you, to accompany you. it's not that he doesn't trust the rest of the crew, but really, this is the closest thing to a date you've ever gotten. taking in the sights of new worlds, creating new memories together, and maybe getting tossed in a bit of trouble along the way. sure, it may be tiring or troublesome, but he wouldn't want to face it with anyone else.

those that come across him know him as welt yang, but this is the name he has inherited. he doesn't tell it often, perhaps, but at least you know him. the real him. he's not just welt to you, but also joachim. it is something he entrusted to you, who he is, who he once was, who he shall become— everything about him.

he adores you, and all your entirety. you are like a burning star in the galaxy above, one that burns with him.

together with gepard landau . . .

gepard, captain of the silvermane guards is a busy, busy man. between his duties as captain and his daily life, he does his best to find time for you. his lack of charm is exactly what makes him charming, some may say. he's no nonsense, stubborn, "famously uncompromising" ( as his sister claims ) with an unmatched loyalty. it sounds horrendous, but perhaps that's exactly why you love him.

you tell him he should prioritise his duty first and foremost, he is an important figure in belobog, after all. and he does, he stubbornly commits to it. even if he can see in your eyes that you're hesitantly letting him go again. it's in these rare moments that he gives you a small, warming smile and a gentle embrace— he tells you that he'll do his best, for the preservation of belobog, for its people— and most importantly, you.

bothering him on patrol isn't one of your favourite activites, there are definitely more enriching things out there, but you still do it from time to time. usually, it's when the nights are a little colder and you can't seem to sleep. it's the same old thing, each and every time. he tells you you should get home, but not after a quick walk together with him. you'd chat about the little things, and he'd even shyly try to hold your hand in such a moment. after that, he personally escorts you back to your residence, and never forgetting to leave without a kiss goodnight. it may be a simple kiss on the back of your hand, or you might get up for a quick kiss on the cheek. you don't know what you do to him.

gepard doesn't strike me as a type that knows a lot in this area. he was born and raised as a noble child, and then went straight into becoming a protector of the city he grew up in. he'd feel a little flustered at a few things, the ideas and thoughts that come to him while together with you. he's even more embarrassed as he goes to his sister for advice on how to deal with such emotions. he reads books, fiction of romance that he does best to turn into your reality. it's not perfect— he's still clueless on what's a really good date— but he's always trying harder just for you.

it's not often that he gets free time, but once he does, he's quick to seek you out... after his sister of course. for many good reasons, actually. other than the usual check in with his sister he loves so dearly, she is more helpful than most others despite her teasing. serval is a big source of support in his relationship with you, not to say you two can't handle it yourselves. he's just rather clueless about love as a whole sometimes, and she's there to give him a little nudge in the right direction. thanks to her, gepard brought you flowers once, and he does it every so often.

never underestimate the lengths he'd go for you. he may be constantly out there in the front lines trying to combat the antimatter legion and the fragmentum, and he may be busy with training the guards or some other silvermane business, but he would always keep you in mind. you're part of his motivation, and you've grown to be the biggest part of it. you could tell him it's nothing important, if you ask for something, like a favour or likewise, but because it's you, he'll put it right at the top of his priorities. you are his priority.

dates are difficult, especially when you're captain of the guards. walking around with him attracts more attention than any other thing, but it doesn't stop him from inviting you out. the luxuries of belobog would be easy for him to indulge in, as a landau and as captain, but truly, simply spending time with him is enough. your favourite dates are ones where you freely walk aimlessly in the day, perhaps after a bite to eat. fresh snowfall is light upon the city streets, unlike the eternal freeze. you find it hard to resist temptation, letting yourself be swept off your feet for a sweet kiss in the everlasting winter snow.

gepard landau has an immense lack of charm. he's stubborn, he's uncompromising, and maybe even a little dense or a little blunt. but the brighter side of these qualities always show around you. he'll find a way to see you, and he won't rest until he has. his lack of knowledge in this department has him cutely flustered from time to time, but also has him doing unknowingly romantic things. he loves you, and he wants you to know that.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

heyy didnt know if you were down for requests but i js though elliot or dom teaching you how to play the guitar would be rlly cute and shit 😭

(also i love ur fics sm like pls marry me)

Okay well this is literally the cutest request ever!

Also you're the cutest, I accept your proposal! Thank you so much for the love and support, I adore you- reach out any time bestie <3

"You should take a break from school, ya know, give your boyfriend some attention while he's here in your vicinity." Elliot whines from the bed, sprawling out across the comforter as he groans, rubbing his tired eyes as I look over at the clock, not expecting it to be well after midnight. Guilt suddenly swarms around me, realizing he's been sitting here for hours, waiting for me to give him attention while I completely and utterly focus on school.

"Finals are coming up soon and I am completely and utterly unprepared." I trail off, the pit in my stomach only growing as I think of my upcoming tests in three different classes, knowing that I'm totally unprepared for all of them combined.

It's been a rough year, don't judge me.

"Well who's fault is that, you decided to wait until the last minute to even start-"

"Don't finish that sentence." I point a finger at him and he laughs, his bright smile making me feel a little bit better as I swing around in my chair, looking back and forth between him and the flashcards in front of me.

"Well, if you wanna take a break and come over here, I promise to help you with your flashcards." I ponder his offer for a minute, not expecting him to offer his help, especially when he hates everything that has to do with school, especially all the science classes that I'm in.

"Really?" I bite at my lip and give him a look, a look that he can tell that I feel bad that he would have to help me but I could never decline the help, especially given how desperate I am.

"Really." He nods firmly and I pause, smiling softly at him as I pull my hair down from it's bun, itching at my scalp with a groan.

"Okay." I launch myself out of my chair, flopping onto the bed beside him as he immediately wraps me in his arms, tightly squeezing me as I let out a brief sigh of relief, not realizing how much I missed his arms around me. It feels like I've been gone a century. "Only like twenty minutes and then I have to get back to studying or else I'm seriously going to fail this exam."

"Sounds good." He sighs, sitting up on the bed as he reaches down beside the bed to grab his guitar, strumming quietly as I settle down beside him, watching him with a fond, loving look.

"How did you learn that?" I ask simply, pulling his gaze away from the instrument but he continues to play, shocking me even more.

"The guitar?" I nod. "It's muscle memory. I can teach you."

"I'll probably be ass at it. I'm not the most musically inclined." I laugh and his eyes widen with a knowing glance and I reach out to smack his arm with a loud, offended laugh.

"Trust me, I know- I hear you singing in the shower." Elliot teases and I gasp, sitting up and giving him the most incredulous look, shocked that he hears me and noting to myself to be quieter with my concerts.

"Rude." I mumble.

"It's a good thing you're cute." He presses his finger to the tip of my nose and it scrunches under his touch, my head tilting playfully at him. "Here, you can strum and I'll show you the fingering of it."

"Fingering." I snort and his jaw drops at my innuendo, pinching my side.

"Shut up." He continues to move his fingers around the strings as I strum softly, my gaze stuck on the way his fingers move without the need for him to even watch what he's doing. "See it's not that bad?"

"Don't your fingers get tired?" I ask, feeling the tips of my fingers burn as if there's carpet burn on the tips of each of them and he gives me a shrug, taking my fingers in his grasp to press a kiss to each individual finger.

"Never, I have fingers of steel."

"Trust me, I know." I mock him and his head tips back in laughter, red dusting his cheeks at my taunting.

"Shut up."

[claymoresword]

I Choose Her | Chapter 15

Hermione Granger x Slytherin Fem!Reader

Summary: You are the daughter of two known death eaters from one of the oldest and richest families in the wizarding world. Are you truly prepared to give up everything you know for Hermione Granger?

Pairing: Hermione x Reader

Wordcount: 4.3k

Warnings: character death, mentions of animal abuse, y/n and hermione are so protective of each other it's sick

Note: Hello! wow this one took forever, I feel bad that I'm always apologizing for delayed updates but oh well here we are :/ this one is more to move the plot forward and I wanted to follow canon in a way that would make sense for this story

anyway, as always thank you so much for the continued support and an even bigger thanks for your patience! crossing my fingers that updates will be more frequent from here on out. that's it, i hope you enjoy this one!

Taglist: @gvrsto @aweidlich @xxsekhmet @arielj @poppyflower-22 @scarleigh1989 @smut-religiously777 @cocoyeehaw @blackbirdv98 @arcturusseer @iamcapitalgbicorn8287 @lonewalker17 @karasonromanoff @httphayn @bigbadsofty07 @cherryflavoredcoke @dumpsapphic @idontwannabehereatm @js-a-writer @baylegend6 @puta1

Hermione stands over you as you hold out the thick strand of hair, pinched in between your fingers.

Harry and Ron stare at it with bated breaths, the air in between the four of you is still; anticipating.

You didn't have to consider for too long to know it belonged to your mother. You had nearly mistaken it for your own, if it weren't for the grayish undertones, only fully visible when illuminated.

It seems every time you saw your mother, her hair would be a shade lighter. As time did its duty, as the years passed, the older each of you got, the less you resembled the other.

You don't see your mother when you look in the mirror, not anymore.

"Are you sure that's hers?" Ron asks as you rise from your crouching position.

The painful lump in your throat prevents you from answering him.

You swallow thickly.

"I'm sure." You finally say.

Silence once again, as Ron reaches out to carefully pick out the strand, retrieving it from your grip, he drops it into the flask he held in his other hand with even more precision.

The only noise that fills the air is a faint sizzle, as the polyjuice potion consumes its final ingredient.

You feel Hermione move to your side, her fingers curl around your bicep, her other hand firmly intertwines with yours.

"Are you certain we'll be allowed into Bellatrix's vault?" Harry asks, he looks at you expectantly and you grace him with an assured nod.

"I've seen my mother retrieve things for her dozens of times, it'll work." You claim, but Harry's immediate skepticism doesn't evade you, and honestly, you can't hold it against him.

Your plan is far from foolproof. Like many times before the four of you are simply hoping to get by on pure chance and luck.

"How do we know what it is, when we get in her vault? I mean, a Horcrux could be anything." Ron asks, a question you were all wondering.

"I'll know." Harry quips plainly.

You glance at Hermione to shoot her a look before returning your attention back to Harry.

"It's hard to explain but– I'll just know." He adds, and none of you wish to push on the subject further.

════════════════════════════════════════════

You watched as Hermione lifted the flask filled with polyjuice to her lips, but then she pauses. Her shoulders rise as she takes a deep breath, as if preparing herself.

"Wait–" You interject, rising from the bed, in three large strides you are standing before your girlfriend.

"Let me drink it." You then place a hand over Hermione's, but she pries it off lightly.

"No, I'll do it." She counters, and you don't attempt to mask your disapproval.

"You can't drink it." Hermione reiterates.

"When we get to Gringotts, it'll appear more believable with you by my side, you know it." She adds, and you hate that Hermione is right.

You sigh.

"Darling, it's too dangerous." You breath out, your hand travels up her forearm, eventually tenderly cupping her face.

Hermione instinctively shuts her eyes at the sensation, she leans into your touch, her muscles no longer tense, her body visibly reacts to your warmth.

"We're all in danger." She finally claims, once your eyes meet again.

"This is the only way. There's another Horcrux hidden in her vault, we just have to find it." Hermione states assuredly but it does nothing to convince you of the plan.

You remain staring at your girlfriend, Hermione always had a way of making your heart feel like it could just implode within your chest.

You are overcome with love, care, and longing, all of these feelings encapsulated in the sheer dread of what's to come, of what might happen.

Hermione finds no trouble in returning your gaze.

This wordless exchange lasts for several seconds until Hermione decides to take advantage of your unmoving state. She leans in, passionately capturing your lips with her own.

Your hands quickly shift to rest on her waist, you then feel Hermione's hand move to the back of your head, pulling you closer.

You are taken aback as she opens her mouth wider, deepening the kiss, soon enough her tongue makes contact with your own.

You have no air left in your lungs, but the last thing you wish to do is pull away.

Hermione lets out a light hum as she presses her body up against yours; her eagerness causes your entire body to tremble, you worry your legs might give out at any moment.

The kiss ends as abruptly as it began.

A sharp gasp leaves Hermione's lips as she takes a step back, as if it proved a real struggle for her to cease the kiss.

Soon a sense of euphoria overcomes your entire being, even if it is fleeting, you feel at peace and it translates into a boyish grin across your face.

Hermione notices, and she has to bite her bottom lip to hide a smile herself.

She places a lingering hand over your chest before shoving you away playfully.

"Go on, wait outside. I'll meet you there." Hermione orders, and you know better than to protest.

════════════════════════════════════════════

You continued to pace back and forth, the usually maddening feeling of sand repeatedly filling your shoes does nothing to distract you.

Trepidation rapidly materializes within you the longer you waited for your girlfriend.

By taking the Polyjuice and assuming your mother's identity, Hermione is putting herself in immense danger, and you are expected to stand by and simply witness it, again.

"It'll be fine." You hear Harry's voice, but you don't acknowledge him.

You can't feel anything beyond the incessant pounding in your head; you possessed barely any strength at all, you mustered just enough to stomach this.

Soon enough, Hermione emerges from the hut and the sight you are met with is unsettling.

The woman standing before you appears to resemble your mother. Wearing the clothes your mother would wear, there was no trace of Hermione, beyond her voice.

Harry and Ron fail to speak alongside your silence. Hermione looks between the three of you impatiently.

"So, how do I look?" She asks, and you can't help but grimace.

"Disturbing." You quip.

Then you had no choice but to look away.

"Come on, let's just get this over with." You release an exasperated breath and Harry emerges next to you with Griphook.

"Griphook you give that to Hermione to hold onto, alright?" The man states, but it mainly sounded like a warning.

The Goblin lets out a subtle gripe as he hesitates, before eventually sheathing the steel into your girlfriend's bag.

"You get us into Bellatrix's vault, and the sword is yours." Harry reassures.

Ron finally takes out his wand so he may alter his own appearance, with a single wave, his hair is inches longer. The beard that appears on his face ages him, and makes him nearly unrecognizable.

"Now remember the plan, I'll be under the cloak with Griphook. Y/n and Hermione you'll try to convince the Goblin to let you through. Ron, you stand back in case anything happens." Harry runs through the plan once more and this time you don't suppress a scoff.

Hermione grabs your arm, wordlessly asking for you to stand down.

"This is a terrible plan." You say it anyway, and Harry doesn't retaliate, instead he nods in agreement.

"I know. But it's still the best one we've got."

════════════════════════════════════════════

You had to remind yourself to breathe as you walked through the doors of Gringotts.

Although certain the anxiety you are feeling at this moment is incomparable to the terror Hermione must be experiencing.

You had to battle every instinct urging you to reach out and hold your girlfriend's hand.

Ron trails closely behind the two of you, Harry and Griphook somewhere close by, hidden by the cloak of invisibility.

You brace yourselves once you get to the podium, a moment passes, but the Goblin on duty fails to acknowledge your presence entirely.

Hermione takes it upon herself to clear her throat.

Still, nothing.

She glances at you for help, and you nod, urging her to speak.

"I wish to enter." Your girlfriend states curtly, her best attempt to appear menacing.

In any other instance you would find it a little humorous, but right now, Hermione's poor imitation only makes you wince.

The Goblin fails to acknowledge either of you still, your patience rapidly thinning out.

"My mother has been sent to clear out Madam Lestrange's vault. I am certain you understand why you mustn't delay us." You say and the creature finally looks up.

His entire demeanor shifts, but it only helped to annoy you further.

"Madam, forgive me I did not realize it was you." Bogrod says, feigned cordiality.

"Of course you may enter.. but first, do you mind presenting your wand?" He adds and there is a pause.

You can sense Hermione's panic, but she tries her best to maintain a composed front.

She folds her arms over her chest.

"I hardly think that's necessary." Hermione states.

"I'm afraid I must insist." The Goblin's grin falters, and you realized you had to quickly step in

"Why?" You say, instinctively stepping forward, partially shielding Hermione with your body.

"New policy, I'm afraid." Bogrod explains, but before you can argue your case, the creature's expression shifts.

Your eyes catch the waft of green smoke seeping into the Goblin's nostrils.

You manage a quick glimpse of what looked like the tip of a wand being retracted, it disappears seemingly into thin air.

Y/n quickly realizes that Harry has sensibly, stepped in before things got ugly.

In an instant, the Goblin changes his tune.

"Very well, Madam, if you will follow me." He says with a dopey smile.

You hear Hermione let out a sigh of relief, you can't help but do the same.

════════════════════════════════════════════

The ride through the dungeons was nothing close to pleasant. The cart transporting you zoomed at an unfathomable speed, the abrupt turns and twists would have made you nauseous, if you weren't feeling sick already.

Hermione continues clutching your hand in hers, tighter than usual, your grip is similar in turn.

Finally, the cart halts, and before you know it, the six of you are free falling dozens of feet.

You reach for your wand in your pocket but Hermione beats you to it.

"Arresto Momentum!" She exclaims, and your bodies hang mid air, inches from the ground. Soon the spell wears off, the six of you fall onto the cold, wet, stone, front first.

"Thank you, Hermione." Harry says, as he helps himself off the ground.

You quickly do the same, rushing over to help your girlfriend up.

Hermione gladly takes your hand, when your eyes meet, you notice her appearance, she is back to her usual self.

The Polyjuice potion had entirely worn off but Bogrod, still under the Imperius curse, is unable to do anything about it.

"Come on, this way." Griphook shouts, he leads the four of you to the vaults.

He navigates the dark cavern with ease, as you try to get your eyes to adjust, a piercing screech fills the air, and it causes both you and Hermione to glance at each other.

You warily follow Griphooks lead, but the sight you're met with when the six of you turn the corner makes your breath catch in your throat.

"That's a Ukrainian Ironbelly–" Ron points out, awe and disbelief you shared.

Then Griphook picks up an object you quickly deduced to be a certain type of bell. As he shakes it, the dragon's screeching intensifies, it flails around as if trying to escape the noise.

It was only then you noticed the thick metal chains around its neck and legs.

"It's been trained to expect pain when it hears this sound." The creature claims and Hermione releases you so she may step forward, following his lead.

She speaks once she is in earshot of the Goblin.

"That's barbaric." Your girlfriend says, a certain tenor to her voice, you knew her well enough to recognize that she was truly indignant.

The dragon's screeching continues as the four of you slip past it.

It only retreats to cowers silently in the corner once the noises from the bell stops.

The vault is now in sight, as the group approaches you can't help but notice that Bogrod has disappeared.

You glance out at where you spotted the Goblin last and sure enough. He was standing in front of the dragon, simply staring at it; the curse has evidently impaired his judgment and all sense of danger.

"Wait– what do we do with him?" You gesture to Bogrod.

Although before anyone can respond, the Ukrainian Ironbelly takes a large step forward, then from its mouth, comes flames, big and blistering enough to turn the entire space scorching hot in an instant.

The once Goblin was now burnt to nothing but ash.

Hermione, Y/n and the boys only manage to stare in utter shock.

"That's unfortunate." Ron finally quips.

"Come on, we don't have much time." Griphook warns, he advances forward and the four of you follow.

As you arrive at the vault, it appears familiar to you, but only distantly.

It was not the vault Snape led you to a few months ago but it appears almost identical.

"Is this where you got the sword?" Hermione asks in a hushed tone, and you quickly shake your head.

"No, the key Snape gave me led to a different vault." You explain, but your girlfriend doesn't say anything, expecting your response.

As the five of you enter Bellatrix's vault, it is worse than you expected.

It is filled with random trinkets, some valuable, some not.

The three of you sport a defeated expression, but Harry was not going to give up so easily.

He steps forward.

"It's in here, I can sense it." He states.

You observe silently as The Chosen One approaches a particular cup, amidst an array of objects that look nearly identical to it.

Soon enough he reaches for it.

Harry holds out the cup, nothing is said, but there is an energy that reverberates through the air.

It's unmistakable. He has a Horcrux in hand.

"Pass me the sword." He extends his arm and Hermione scrambles through her bag, eventually retrieving the steel.

She passes it to Harry, he grips the pommel, but doesn't get the chance to do much else as a noise captures your attention.

Ron knocks over a goblet by accident, instead of breaking as it touches the ground, it only multiplies.

As the duplicate makes contact with another object it does the same thing. Soon objects are spawning at a rapid rate, filling up the already limited vacant space by your feet.

"What's happening?" Hermione exclaims over the loud noise, you instinctively step to her side as she nearly loses her balance.

"It's an enchantment, everything you touch will multiply." The Goblin explains, you aren't given much chance to come up with an escape plan as the objects quickly engulf all five of you.

For what felt like eternity, you fought to keep your head above.

You spot Hermione and Ron doing the same, but you can't see Harry anymore.

Amidst the chaos, somehow, Griphook gets a hold of the Horcrux.

Then, Harry finally emerges from the sea of gold and silver. He frantically looks around, in search of the object, but his attention shifts to the Goblin as he proudly holds up the Horcrux.

"We had a deal, Griphook!" Harry bellows, and the creature only grins, malicious, irritating.

"The cup for the sword!" He strikes up the bargain, and you curse under your breath.

It is getting increasingly difficult to stay afloat, and you watched as Hermione and Ron struggled the same.

Harry begrudgingly hands over the sword, the Goblin then returns the Horcrux back to him.

"I said I'd get you in, I never said anything about getting you out." Griphook quips, he holds his hand up against the door, unlocking it.

Soon the objects begin spilling out of the vault after him but the four of you continue to struggle to make your way to the exit.

If only you could retrieve your wand, you could stop the Goblin from going any further.

"Hermione, can you reach your wand?" You shout, and the struggle in your girlfriend's face is evident.

"I'm trying!" She replies.

After moments of struggle, the four of you miraculously manage to make your way out, but it was too late.

The Goblin is nowhere to be seen.

"Griphook!" Harry calls out in anger, he doesn't expect a reply, and he doesn't receive one.

His voice echoes through the dungeons, and it only works to disturb the dragon ahead.

It lets out another deafening screech.

You approach slowly, in search of the object that you know will subdue the beast, but you can't find it anywhere and you know for certain Griphook is the reason for it.

"The bell- it's gone." You don't try to conceal your distress.

"That foul creature– how are we supposed to get out of here?" Ron curses and you begin looking around for some type of solution, an idea to come to you.

You take an experimental step forward; careful, quiet.

You consider that perhaps, if you moved slowly, the dragon won't react.

However, your theory was quickly proven incorrect as the beast storms towards you within the confines of its chains, soon opening its mouth.

You were only inches away from getting charred alive before Hermione harshly grabbed your arm, yanking you to her side.

The pins you up against the pillar, out of the dragon's sight.

Ron and Harry stood a few paces away, their backs also against the wall.

"What on earth was your plan there?" Hermione hisses, and you are staggered for a moment.

You've never seen her so furious with you.

"I just thought if I moved quietly–" You start, but then another loud noise pierces the atmosphere.

Clearly, your stunt only exacerbated the dragon's already agitated state.

The sounds that follow suggest that the formidable beast was now fighting to be released from its restraints.

"Don't you ever try something like that again–" Hermione warns, her hand still gripping your collar.

You nod apologetically, suddenly you almost feel like a child being reprimanded.

Your girlfriend finally loosens her grip on your shirt.

The beast's actions begin to get larger and louder, in its outrage it clamours at the stone walls, chipping large pieces off.

"What a joke– did we go through all of that just to die in here?" Ron quips.

"We can't apparate.." Your girlfriend mumbles to herself, mentally debating an escape plan.

"Hermione?" Harry asks, it sounds closer to a desperate plea.

You were all stumped, only hoping that the mostly brilliant mind out of the four of you will manage to think of a plan to escape.

Hermione finally looks up at you, and by the look on her face you can tell whatever it might be; she's figured something out.

"I've got an idea, but it's mad." She admits, with a raised voice and truth be told you hated the sound of that.

Harry and Ron stare at her expectantly and you only grow more nervous by the second.

Hermione turns to y/n, you don't speak a word to her but it is not required as she already senses your anxiety, she places a firm hand on your chest right above your heart, you were certain she can feel it pounding against her palm.

"Just trust me." She reassures, too swiftly for your liking, as she completes her sentence she retreats.

You can only anticipate her next move, and it is not one you'd ever expect, in fact it nearly sends you into an early grave.

You watched as Hermione leaped off the balcony, landing on the dragon's back.

"Hermione!" You exclaim.

She struggles to get a grip of the beast for a moment, you are stunned when the dragon stills, it doesn't try to force Hermione off it's back.

"Come on!" Your girlfriend shouts, and you were first to mirror her earlier action. With a single large leap you manage to grab onto the dragon's horns, you pull yourself up, situating yourself behind Hermione.

The dragon reacts the same, but it is too fixated on the chains wrapped around its neck to care.

Soon enough Harry and Ron manage to climb on as well.

There is a point of eery stillness as the dragon seemingly appears too tired to continue fighting.

"Now what?" Harry poses a good question, and you take it upon yourself to fish out your wand.

"Relashio!" In one swift move, you fling the spell, aiming for the dragon's tail.

The beast reacts violently, in the process, the spell breaks the chains tethering it to the ground, finally freeing the beast from its restraints.

"Defodio!" Your girlfriend exclaims as she holds out her own wand, and soon enough, the dragon takes flight, bursting through the ceiling.

In an instant, Gringotts Bank is reduced to fragments of wood, glass and stone as the dragon flees the building, taking the four of you with it.

════════════════════════════════════════════

You have been on dragonback for what felt like hours, however an uncanny feeling of serenity, fills you as the beast flew through the air, past villages and hillsides.

As you approach the vast water, the dragon begins to fly lower; it appears the beast aims to halt its tiresome journey through the city soon.

"We're dropping!" Harry exclaims, panic begins to set in amongst the four of you once again.

"I say we jump!" Ron suggests, but you aren't particularly fond of the idea.

"What?" You bark.

"When?" Hermione chimes in.

"Now!" Harry responds as he lets go, you watched as he falls into the freezing water below.

He is quickly followed by Ron and Hermione, and you let out a groan as you release your grip on the dragon.

"Damn you, Weasley!" You exclaim as you freefall into the lake.

As your body touches the water, it immediately feels like hundreds of blistering hot knives are incessantly puncturing your skin.

It is almost unbearable, but then your head rises to the surface and pure instinct kicks in. The four of you, with some difficulty, eventually manage to swim to shore.

-

Hermione grabs your hand to help you up, in your weakened state you barely manage to climb the cliff.

Harry storms ahead, seemingly unaffected, no doubt driven by pure adrenaline.

"He knows." He blurts out.

"You know who." Harry explains, and Hermione lets go of your hand to catch up to the dark haired man.

"He knows we broke into Gringotts, he knows what we took, and he knows we're hunting Horcruxes." He admits.

"How is it you know?" You ask, jogging slightly to catch up, Ron following closely behind.

"You let him in?" Hermione asks, her tone dissaproving.

"Harry you can't do that–" She says but her bestfriend interrupts.

"Hermione, I can't always help it! Or maybe I can, I don't know." He retaliates.

"Never mind that, what happened?" You interject.

The four of you halt as you get to the top of the cliff.

"Well, he's angry– and scared too." Harry starts, he holds out his hands as Hermione retrieves her bottle of Essence Of Dittany from her bag.

She places a few drops on his palms, doing the same on yours, and then Ron's.

You rub your hands together as Harry continues speaking.

"He knows if we can find and destroy all the Horcruxes, we'll be able to kill him. I reckon he'll do anything to stop that happening." Harry finishes and you scowl at the thought.

Soon, the boys begin stripping so they may change into dry clothes.

Hermione instead retrieves a large blanket from her bag, she drapes it over you, before pulling you close to her body so she may share your warmth.

"There's more– one of them's at Hogwarts." Harry explains.

"What?" Ron says in disbelief and his friend only nods.

"You saw it?" Your girlfriend asks, skeptical.

Harry nods again.

"I saw the castle, and Rowena Ravenclaw. It must have something to do with her, we have to go there now." The Chosen One states, assuredly.

"What? We can't do that, we've got to plan, we've got to figure it out." Hermione counters.

"Hermione when have any of our plans ever actually worked?" Harry recounts, his gaze shifting between y/n, Hermione and Ron.

"We plan, we go there, all hell breaks lose." The dark haired man states, and neither of you have an argument, he was stating the plain truth.

"He's right– just one problem." Ron starts.

"Snape's headmaster now, we can't just walk through the front door."

Then there's a pause.

You can feel Hermione shivering against you, you swiftly wrap an arm around her, an attempt to keep her as close as possible.

"Well, then we'll go to Hogsmeade. To Honeydukes– take the secret passage." Harry offers a solution, and you nod in agreement.

"I think– there's something wrong with him–" He adds, and the three of you wait for Harry to explain.

"In the past, I've always been able to follow his thoughts– now everything just sort of feels disconnected." The dark haired man says, he adjusts the glasses on his face.

"Maybe it's the Horcruxes? Maybe he's growing weaker, maybe he's dying?" Ron suggests but Harry was quick to shake his head.

"No, it's more like he's wounded. If anything he feels more dangerous." Harry states plainly, and now you are shivering for an entirely different reason.

Hermione glances at you, as you exhange a look, you can't help but acknowledge that all too familiar sense of impotence as it looms over all of you.

The uncertainty and impending doom; it feels as though the more Horcruxes you uncover, the more uncertain the end seems.

[veryinjuredperson]

i'm not sure how many people will actually see this post, but anyone who does, hi! i'm vip, and i have some pressing questions on my ol' mind!

so, i'm... severly mental ill, to say the least of it, diagnosed with depression, adhd, anxiety, bpd, professional suspicions of autism and ptsd, and personal suspicions of some sort of dissociative disorder.

to make this easier, im going to breakdown what's been happening...

so, i can't say i've ever noticed being GONE from the present per say, but it's more like... i'm sort of present at all times, but have different personalities or voices who crop up and direct me. my tones change, sometimes my accent changes, my mood changes, the words i use change, certain skill sets might change, thought processes change, etc.

i've struggled with identity for a long time, i just don't like to share that fact usually, particularly because it scares the shit out of me and also due to the fact that i am constantly telling myself that i must be an attention seeker and a faker and a liar, even though i have only spoken about my suspicions of potentially being a system with a single trusted person.

some voices have names, there are several who are at least based on fictional characters, and others who aren't... sometimes i can communicate more clearly between separate voices, and other times it feels like one train of thought that's jumping back and forth for a single mental conversation, like i say something and then respond to myself but it still doesn't feel like just me? i have had people point out that i'm acting different before, but i have a consistent stream of consciousness, so i feel like that's kind of... idk... i feel like that's not how systems work, is it? bc it's less like individual people who take the reigns and more like i am a sort of central core, and then there are little voices or influences, some stronger or bolder than others, who sort of... blend in with me? and influence what i'm doing... so like... i know what's going on, i feel in control, but i don't feel... normal?

if anyone has any way they can help me decipher some of this, please let me know. for now, i've taken to using plural kit and simply plural to log these personality shifts.

i do intend to speak to a psychiatrist and/or at least a therapist about this, but i haven't been able to get that far quite yet. any help in the meantime would be greatly appreciated.

( i have trauma, but a lot of my childhood from at least anything prior to 6th grade is rather blurry, there's memories here and there, some clearer than others, some just gone, i know i've had some pretty bad medical trauma all prior to the age of three, but also some beyond that, i know my parents have always fought a lot, i know that i never stayed in one school for longer than a single grade year, i know i had very inconsistent friendships, i know i played pretend or even "played games with myself" including "hide and seek" which was... generally just sad... but yeah, i do have trauma, i js dont know if it's enough to cause what happened? oh! i also started school a year earlier than most, so i turned 10 part way into 5th grade, i know a lot of sources say that this stuff had to happen prior to... 9? 7? it's unclear... but... just letting that be known )

[callatia]

— 𝓌hen they kiss you

ㅤ𓏵ㅤ⠀⠀⠀featuring. tashi duncan, art donaldson, patrick zweig

genre. suggestive—mainly js making out— fem!reader ( MASTERLIST )

my bad if there's any errors !!! ⭐️

TASHI DUNCAN

"ugh— today was exhausting," you grunt, exhaling shakily. bound with exhaustion, your head fell against tashi's shoulder. forced to practice for hours on end alongside tashi, it was difficult to not be stricken by fatigue.

and well, tashi? the girl just sat there beside you, barely sweating in comparison to you. she simply looked at you, her eyes intense yet gentle—the same sense of gentle you adored.

"it sure was," she agrees, a chuckle escaping her breath, "but it was worth it, being able to practice with you."

it was absurd how easy it was for tashi to make your breath hitch—to make your head spin. to put it simply, you adored tashi so much, and the sincerity laced in her words just made your heart race even more.

"yeah— yeah, it definitely was," you agreed, as you tried to hold back an ear-to-ear grin.

before advancing, she took your hand in hers, her thumb hovering over your knuckles, "i think, that there's just something about you—something i can't figure out," she whispered, her gaze fixated on you, "yet, it makes every moment with you special."

you knew what was coming—who wouldn't? you two never put a label on your relationship, yet both of you knew it was more than a simple friendship. beneath your nervousness, your breath hitched in anticipation.

hastily, her hands moved to the back of your neck, her touch firm and precise, as she pressed closer to you.

her lips captured yours in a kiss that was anything but gentle. it's as if she was waiting every moment, storing it inside her heart, to just kiss you. she kissed you as if she couldn't get enough, her mouth hastily moving against yours with an urgency.

tashi's hands soon found its way to your hip, holding you firmly against the lockers. you melted against her, your thighs clenching, as you found yourself wishing for more.

"been wanting to do this since forever," tashi drawls against your lips, her, her words almost desperate sounding. you had to bite down on your lower lip to restrain yourself from ripping her shirt off then and there.

her kisses were unrestrained, almost eager to finally be against yours. tashi nipped at your lower lip, teasing you before deepening the kiss, her tongue exploring your mouth fervently.

bringing herself closer to you, tashi bit your lower lip again, grinning at the way you slightly winced. shortly, her hand slid further up your shirt, making you shiver.

ART DONALDSON

art was no fair by any means; from the moment he saw you, he knew he had to make you his.

your breath hitches once art barged into your dorm room, as you find yourself growing flushed from the sight of a disheveled art—a hand over your heart signaling your surprise.

"what are you doin' here?" you mumble under your breath while art sauntered over to you, a smirk playing on his face.

"my bad," he drawls, his voice smooth and calm, "didn't mean to barge in like this."

"—although, i had to see you."

you smile at him before shrugging, "you could've called at least."

art's gaze softened, a playful glint on his eyes as he spoke, "so you don't like my surprises, huh?" as he steps closer, you could feel his breath against your lips—almost like an invitation.

you roll your eyes, feeling a warmth spread around your face at his sudden bluntness; he was so close to you, and you could practically feel his lips, but what was he thinking?

tonight, it was like no other—a confident in art's demeanor was clear, and that made your heart skip a beat. his eyes immediately locks onto yours, making your breath hitch in anticipation.

"you wanna know why i'm actually here?" he muses, his hands resting on your hips. though, shortly after, he closes the gap between the two of you, his hand hastily pressing against your lower back. guiding you back, he gently pushes you back against the soft mattress of your bed.

his actions took your breath away, catching you off guard, and as you looked up at him, art's eyes locked onto you.

"i just… couldn't help myself—couldn't get you out of my head," he whispers against your lips, and without another word, he captured your lips that was both confident and passionate.

his mouth moves against yours in a precise movement, conquering with a fervor that left both you and art for more. in fact, you found yourself surrendering to his overwhelming desire, letting him lead you.

his lips were hungry, and you could never deny art—not when he was so magnetic. your hands shortly found their way to his chest, feeling his abs tightly before he pulls away slowly, her lips brushing against yours.

"you're irresistible, you know that?" art admits, a grin playing on his face before his hands slid lower.

PATRICK ZWEIG

patrick sighs out heavenly, cradling you into his embrace. you rarely ever see patrick due to both your packed schedules, and it was shown through the way you two held onto each other firmly.

his thumb traces your lower lip before speaking up, "you look tired, you know," making you slightly tilt your head.

"nonsense," you shrugged, your hands were dancing over the edge of his shirt, gently hooking your index finger to meet his bare neck. his body shivered at the trifling lace of your hands on his neck.

a strong feeling of gratitude—they always came back to patrick whenever he missed you and simply just wanted to be against your plush lips forever. his lips, previously gliding over yours, now were hastily against yours, making your breath quicken.

desire floods through your veins when patrick wraps his arms around your waist, immediately pressing you closer against him. a smirk pulls at his teeth before he deepened the kiss even more, a heat curled up at your cheeks.

unexpectedly, patrick pulls away, only to bury his head against the nook of your neck, lips locking against your soft skin. you shudder against the rush of patrick's sloppy, wet kisses against your skin.

your hands stilled against his back for a quick second before sliding up, making patrick hoist you up onto the bed. your hands soon found refuge in his dark hair, entangled in his locks.

"having fun there, huh?" patrick chuckles, a hint of a teasing smile playing on his face before he searched for your lips hungrily.

his lips needy and full of hunger against yours, making you tremble beneath him. meekly nodding, a broken moan escapes your mouth.

[bambisnc]

a guide to : whispers of sealook high [ft. ot7 riize!]

okay lovely player, here and now i, the creator, will be explaining to you how this game (series) will play out.

throughout the storyline, you will meet different characters. you can choose to play through their routes and make choices specific to them; but you must remember to not neglect your duties and relationships towards the other characters.

should you happen to make a wrong decision, you will get a BAD END. there may be multiple of these scattered throughout; so beware!

in most cases, you will get the option to simply go back and restart from whichever point you choose. however, certain cases will involve polls via which all the players must make one collective decision. whichever option wins the poll will become the only playable option.

for example; say there's a poll which poses the question of choosing which riize member you wish to hangout with for the day. if sungchan wins the poll (i.e. has the maximum number of votes) you will only get to hangout with him (meaning, i will write only for him).

this is a new concept i'm trying out, so i'm mainly winging everything; hence i am definitely more than open to any suggestions or tips or even some ideas that you might want to see here!

notes : not anything too hugebut im swamped w overthinking rn so!! js a little explanation/intro for the series <3 and the header did take me 3 hours tyfa! and obviously tumblr fucjed up how it looks so click for better qquality OH AND THE LITTLE DOODLES KINDA GIVE HINTS ABOUT ALL THE CHARAS !!! SO HEHE HAVE FUN W THAT <3

[p-oisn]

✪ moot appreciation time ! tag some of your fav moots and share what you love about them ! then place this in other blogs asks !

okay I tried including as many ppl as possible but these are the ones I can list from the top of my head / interact w the most so </3

@pupicito : SUUPER CUTE ACC ??? like every mb is so unique n cool everyone should frame fish's mbs on their wall 🤕 n also so supportive like every post of theirs deserves a billion notes . alsososo thee most fun person to talk to ever 😞 js so sweet I wake up solely to look at fish's mbs they are so perfect i could talk abt them forever

@wiotas : I was acc so happy when I found out we knew each otber from like late 2022 ish i forgot ... (you knew me since my wannabe edgy phase but 😨) bc i rmb wanting to be your friend so bad bc you seemed so cool n now we're moots ?!?! you're so sweet liek omg ☹️☹️☹️ you always are so supportive n everytime you use my mbs as your theme i feel like biting into a brick wall BC WDYM you like my mbs enough to use them as your theme that's such an honour coming from you esp ?! 😞

@y-vna : DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ??? like oooh I'm so happy to have ari as a moot I don't even know what I did to deserve her 😞 n also you have such stunning jaw dropping toe curling stomach churning mbs like omg ???? giggling everytime I get an mb from from you bc it's literally like a blessing 🤞🏼🤞🏼 n js soo supportive

@jeonzio : scremaing and yelling everytime I look at your acc bc everything and I mean EVERYTHING abt is soooo pretty n pleasing to look at ?? you're soo sweet n also the cutest person ever !! idk what else to say but like live laugh love tee 🤕 I will forever cherish every single one of our interactions bc they are simply the cutest

@koosuvi : YOU'RE SOOO SUPPORTIVE SOBS I lovelovelove every single one of your compliments they make me want to start jumping around my room giggling 😞 n also you quite literally have one of THEE prettiest accs on tumblr like omg pls teach ... your mbs are always out of this world 😖😖 I love you n everything ab your blog never stop posting plz ill cry

@yeritos : JUNEEE my fav my fav my fav ☹️ the best nctzen on this app ugh there aren't enough words to describe my love for you 😞 your mbs are literally soooo gorgeous omg i was screaming n crying when you followed me back bc im literally your #1 fan . you're sososo nice n amazing n everything 🌸 I love waking up to your mbs everyday n eating my yeritos meal 🍴

@tookio : ONE OF THE BEST MOODBOARD CREATORS ON THIS APP literally no one comes close i mean it 😞 your entire account is sooo stunning like you really deserves ALLL the love in the world !! n omg how I love your comments they make my day soo much better I love you so much for that istg :(

@jaes1lvr : literally hugs n kisses to mely 🫂 /p one of my biggest supporters too n js super sweet 😞 your mbs are js sooo unique I wish I could plaster it on my forehead so everyone in the world could see them 😡😡 I will forever be grateful for your overwhelming support like omg <33

@s-heon : super cool person that i really really really admire 🤔 like omg i could talk abt how grateful I am to you for hours, days even bc you were like my biggest inspo ever while starting out n also your mbs 🔛🔝 im so happy I ever found your blog it has such a special place in my heart 🤕💓 i loev you to the moon n back .

[hannyoontify]

lessen your burden - choi seungcheol

member | seungcheol x gn!reader

genre | angst, js hurt no comfort, breakup!au (i apologize in advance)

word count | 1.2k

synopsis | seungcheol loved you more than anything, but when he learns that you no longer feel the same way, he's still a little reluctant to let you go.

warnings | cursing, seungcheol is extremely emotionally codependent/unstable, reader is a bit of a dick (i think), arguing, reader loses their shit

notes | i... have no words

''i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i'm such a shitty boyfriend and i'm sorry that i keep having these bad thoughts about us and-'

'seungcheol, what are you saying right now?' you asked, a hint of sleep still laced in your voice. it's only been 3 minutes since you woke up and your boyfriend was sitting in bed next to you with tears in his eyes as he apologized profusely for absolutely nothing. you wondered if this was his fourth or fifth time crying to you this week.

'i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i don't know what else to say, i feel like i should be apologizing right now, but i don't know. i'm sorry. i'm stressed and today just isn't a good day' he rambled on, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

'seungcheol, what the fuck are you talking about? it's only been 5 minutes since we woke up, what do you mean it's not a good day' you said. you would be lying if you said that you weren't slightly agitated by this whole situation because this wasn't what you wanted to hear first thing in the morning.

you noticed seungcheol flinch at your choice of words and you ran a hand against your tired face. 'sorry, i didn't mean to curse'

to say that you and seungcheol's relationship had been tense recently would be an understatement. with your upcoming performance test and potential promotion at work, you were stressed and under a lot of pressure to do well. seungcheol was also job hunting after he was let go from his previous company that was financially struggling. every day, he sat at his computer as he sent out resume after resume and only left your apartment to drink with his friends or for interviews which never ended well.

the two of you had been getting into more arguments as well. it first started out small; bickering when you found a miscellaneous sock on the floor when you got home that soon transitioned to screaming matches every other night. but now, you were both too tired for that as well. you knew, eventually, that you two would break up. it was inevitable.

it wasn't that seungcheol was a bad person or a bad partner, you were simply incompatible with him. that, and you also fell out of love with him at some point and grew tired of your relationship with him. it seemed like all you ever did was give, but you received almost nothing.

'can you please hold me?' seungcheol asked in a quiet voice. a small, exasperated sigh left your lips before you could register what you were doing. once you did, you tried to cover it up by rustling the duvet loudly and motioned for your upset boyfriend to come closer to you.

but seungcheol noticed. he always did. he noticed the way you slightly rolled your eyes whenever he came up to you on the verge of tears. he noticed that every night, you seemed to inch further and further away from him until you were on the edge of the bed, threatening to fall off the mattress. he always tried to brush it off, making up lame excuses for your distant behavior, but now, it was getting harder for him to think of excuses.

pressing his head against your chest, seungcheol listened to your soft heartbeat as you absentmindedly ran your fingers through his hair.

'cheol, we should break up' you quietly said. seungcheol pulled away from your embrace and looked straight ahead. he couldn't look at you. he wouldn't.

'why?' oh he knew why. seungcheol knew why but he still wanted to hear it coming from your mouth–

'i don't love you anymore'

–he takes it back. he takes it all back. he never wants to hear those words coming out of your mouth ever again, it felt like a punch to his gut. seungcheol suddenly couldn't breathe.

'[name], you don't- you don't mean that. please. i need you to comfort me right now, tell me that everything is going to be okay. you can't leave me, not when i'm at my lowest point like this'

you silently slid out of your bed and put on your bathrobe, facing your back towards him. 'i'm sorry, seungcheol. i don't know if i can do this anymore. i'm tired. doesn't my lack of effort make you feel unloved? like you deserve better?'

your boyfriend–almost ex–shook his head profusely. 'no, you're perfect for me. please don't leave me [name]'

'begging isn't gonna get you anywhere, choi seungcheol'

hearing his full name coming from your lips made seungcheol's blood run cold. you only called him by his full name when you were on the verge of lashing out at him and against his better judgement, he apologized again. 'i'm sorry, [name]. if you tell me what i did wrong, i'll fix it and-'

you whipped around. for the first time that day, seungcheol saw your eyes though now he wishes he never had. your usual shining eyes were void of any love and joy that used to be there. instead, they were dark and stormy. full of anger and scorn.

'when is the last time you've comforted me, seungcheol? you go on and on about how you need me and you need to be comforted by me. think about it. when's the last time, you've held me in your arms and told me those 5 words that you want to hear all the time?' once the floodgates had opened, there was no turning back.

seungcheol sat there, stunned as you continued to berate him. what you were saying wasn't wrong. he had been so focused on trying to make himself feel better, he never bothered asking you what was on your mind. he wondered how often your words 'it's going to be okay' were actually meant for you instead of him.

'when i wasn't chosen for the promotion last month, where were you? you were out, drinking with your friends until 2 in the fucking morning'

'i don't understand why you're so obsessed with the promotion, you're still young and you have plenty of time-'

'I DID IT FOR YOU, SEUNGCHEOL. I DID IT FOR US' in the end, you had exploded. 'EVERYONE'S ON MY ASS 24/7 ASKING ME WHEN I'M GONNA GET MARRIED. HOW CAN I GET MARRIED WHEN MY BOYFRIEND IS UNEMPLOYED AND MY PAYCHECK CAN BARELY SUPPORT US BOTH?!'

you took a deep breath, not realizing until now that you were crying. there were tears streaming down your cheeks, similar to seungcheol. taking a moment to collect yourself, you rubbed at your eyes, trying to stop your flowing tears.

'everyday, i get yelled at and scolded by my seniors. i'm currently doing the workload of two people, do you remember me telling you that?'

seungcheol felt a pang of guilt in his chest. he did remember and watching you breakdown like this left him in horror–

'and then i come home, to my apartment that i pay for. and the dishes are still in the sink. the laundry isn't folded. did you expect me to do all the housework as well?'

–was he really this much of a burden to you?–

'i'm tired of this, seungcheol. please. i'm tired of giving and not receiving anything in return' although you stopped crying, your eyes were glistening with tears as you looked at him desperately.

–if that's what you really wanted, he would give it to you–

'i'll be out of here by the end of this week'

–because he still loved you.

reblogs and feedback is always appreciated ^-^

[honeytonedhottie]

honey !! i need ur advice :cc i'm currently in a HUGE drama that tbh hasn't even been acknowledged as a drama n is so petty but.. ! so basically i like this guy and have liked him for AGESS and every girlie in my class knows n they all ship us. BUT theres this one girl who was my best friend at one point :c who's ALWAYSSS flirting with him and like trying to banter with him.. at first i thought they were js friends especially considering that she was the first person i told and she was mega supportive.. but it's getting soso bad like even my friend told me that she saw her MEGA flirting with him n she's even started to ignore me and not speak to me / speak 2 me in a rlly dry way.. i'm super sad bc i miss our friendship but i'm soso done with her constantly trying to get closer to my mans lol. everyone in our year likes her and we have so many moots especially my close friends so i can't cut her off.. help!! lots of love, anon <3

heyy anon 💕 so im sorry to hear about ur ex best friend :( that sucks. BUT im curious to know whats the guy's reaction to all of this? like is he flirting back with her or does he want you?

and if u guys have a lot of mutuals then it is gonna be harder to cut her off but dont feel like u have to! return her energy or simply ignore her and focus on the friends that u do have. shes not worth ur time 💗

[flowerandthesongstress]

Hi I'm dropping by to share an opinion that might be controversial, but might just as well be common and widespread among the 'loved this show as a child, rewatched as an adult' crowd. I'm not sure. I'm always out of the loop. All of the loops.

Anyway.

Recently I'd learned that my SO never watched the X-Files, the show that was my favorite when growing up (yes, I should not have been watching it, but oh well...frankly, I had much worse sources of childhood trauma in my life) and we decided to amend the fact.

Over the course of a few months, we went through approximately 85 to 90% of the episodes. We skipped a few insignificant ones. With insects.

Some short remarks first. One: all of my favorite episodes still hold up and some go twice as hard and Clyde Bruckman goes ten times as hard. Two: Mark Snow might have been in an abusive and mutually codependent relationship with an oboe. Three: "Everything Was Inspired By The X-Files" seriously, so much media in the last two decades has just been 'a person who watched the x-files when growing up is now writing stuff' and I'm not immune ... Four: this video essay that I found after we'd gotten to 'JS's from OS' and I was like "waaaaait I minute, this is... postpomo? in 1996? released around the time Infinite Jest was published? when metamodernism still was little more than a concept in DFW's head? what the heck?" and looked it up to see if my brain was wishful-hallucinating, and found this video essay. Five: when watching the show for the first time, I only knew three names: Anderson, Duchovny, Carter. Like, 'Hello yes this a cool scary TV program with The Anderson and The Duchovny as my Mom and Dad, and all of this program in its entirety is made by The Carter'. That was it. Because only those three names were translated in the credits.

And now I'm going to ask you to please don't kill me. Please. I'm going to die, I promise, I just don't want to be killed right now because of a possibly controversial X-files opinion. This is just a personal opinion. You are free to not share it, you are free to hate me, but could we please avoid conflict and arguments? I love you. I was drugged.

Anyway x 2.

Here's the most important thing I realized now that I'd rewatched the show in English as an adult who'd loved the X-Files as a minor (and watched it dubbed), and then went on to receive a university education that very specifically gives her a shmauthority to determine if a writer is actually a crap writer...

...Chris Carter is actually a crap writer.

He's uuuhm. He's bad at writing. Wait, no, that's unfair. He is what I like to call 'painfully mediocre'. Slightly paraphrasing a quote from my other favorite American show: he's every kid on the playground that didn't get picked on. He's a business casual potted plant, a human white sale. He's VH1, Robocop 2, and Back to the Future 3. He's the center slice of a square cheese pizza. Actually, that sounds delicious. Vince Gilligan is the center slice of a square cheese pizza. He's Jim Belushi.

He's just so. painfully. mediocre as a writer. Some of his choices were BAFFLING. Not just bafflingly bad, but simply baffling in a 'how and why and why would anyone ever think this is a compelling idea' sense. Some moments made me wonder if there's zero self-awareness or negative self-awareness.

Chris Carter would hardly make you mad with how bad he is. He's seldom bad in a memorable way. He was cliche when those cliches weren't yet cliches. When the TV tropes website didn't exist. When metamodernism still was little more than a concept in one bandana-covered, troubled head.

He attempted three other shows. All of them were canceled. Two of them he had to wrap up in the X-Files, and he wrapped them up with as much poise as I wrap burritos when high. One was canceled before airing, but he put a piece of it into an X-Files episode: a minor character in the cold open watches and praises this show, so enraptured that he doesn't hear his daughter being kidnapped by a serial killer or abducted by aliens or neither or both, tbh I'm still not 100% sure what happened and what didn't happen, because that episode was written by Chris Carter. The highest rated episode out of all the episodes in all of the three canceled shows has Darin Morgan's writing credit, and it's a sequel of an X-Files episode. Where Jose Chung just goes 'you know what? this sucks' and dies.

Yes, I did enjoy The Lone Gunmen, but guess who has the most writing credit? Yes, Vince Gilligan. Perhaps, executives didn't really understand and didn't bother looking into why X-Files was such a popular and beloved show? And kept on greenlighting Carter's pet projects and then going: Wait, Where Money? Probably. That's how I imagine the reason. Thing is, the X-Files was so beloved and popular not because of Carter's obsession with Christian symbolism and conspiracies and apocalypse and ambiguity so vague and lazy and full of itself that I felt vicarious embarrassment, not because of his narcissism God complex that is manifested on screen in such a way that watching it feels exactly and very specifically like grinding your teeth while there's a bit of slightly wet sand on them, and not because people ached to learn how aliens would colonize Earth. Characters. We loved the characters. We loved the relationships in the show. And we loved the CRAZY and the over-the-top. And all of the Human, all the Silly, and the Funny, and the Tragically Funny.

Every single episode I remember loving the most, and every single episode that tops every single 'bestest X-Files episodes evah' list, has the writing credit of either Darin Morgan (Humbug, Clyde Bruckman's Final Repose, Jose Chung's From Outer Space, War of the Coprophages), or Vince Gilligan (Soft Light, Pusher, Bad Blood, Small Potatoes, Paper Hearts, Meme— you know what, this is easier), or Glen Morgan + James Wong (Squeeze, The Field Where I Died, Never Again, Musings of the Cigarette-Smoking Man). Not Carter. Although according to a WaPo article I read, Carter was insanely controlling and everything had to go through him. Duh. :-\ Not to mention, his entire writing room was a sausage fest, apparently? And Gillian Anderson finally got to write an episode only in season seven, when the show was about to be foreclosed by Fox and turned into a movie franchise (never happened, alas), and around the 'f*ck it who cares anymore we're rich and uncancellable' time when Gilligan was allowed to write the episode where Mulder solved existential nihilism via freeing a genie? Not surprised.

Meanwhile, Carter himself had written the episodes I was looking forward to the least during this rewatch. And my SO would be like: wow, you're rolling your eyes so hard I'm worried about your vision, should we maybe skip this one..? And I'd be like: no-no imma just do some chores, I really wanna do some chores, I'll be nearby, yes please keep on watching babe, no need to pause, I'll keep the bathroom door open to hear everything while I do my favorite very entertaining things like clean the toilet and scrub the shower and wash the litterbox.

Hmmm? What's that? Post-modern Prometheus is highly rated? Hoo boy :-| Can we please not go there... Also, even without all of the problematic aspects of PMP: 1) even a broken clock can do postmodernism is right twice a day, 2) no, it is not a well written episode; it's loved because of its subtly familiar nostalgic visuals and because it attempts to imitate Darin Morgan's signature style with about as much success as I had while trying to imitate Lovecraft when my English was at ~C1 level and then I started crying and went to Postmodernism and told him 'please mister postmodernism sir, please save me by making it all into a long setup to a punchline'.

Anyway x 11:21.

This whole realization made me dislike the Auteur theory even more. My relationship with it was already so hostile that we've been sending each other death threats every month since I was seventeen.

Yes, I should be fair(er). Chris Carter's primary role is NOT that of a writer, but a producer and director and *cringes* shOwRuNnEr. He was the one who pitched the show to Fox, was rejected, and fought for it until they agreed. Without him, the X-Files would not have existed at all. And all bad jokes aside, this show helped me a lot when I had no one and nothing else to help me. I was indeed in a parasocial relationship with its leads. They were my TV parents. Thing is, everything you love about the X-Files' writing... like me, any other casual viewer might discover that all of these things were not done by Carter. Yet he was getting all of the credit.

This is a very important, and seemingly obvious but not really, factoid that applies to a lot of shows and movies. The person you give credit for a thing is often not the person who should be getting it. If you're rolling your eyes right now and calling me agent Obvious: may I remind you, I'm permanently out of the loop about everything. EVERYTHING.

I'm not going to devolve this into a rant about Auteur theory...Because then I'd be here all day or until I start foaming at the mouth. And I'm sure everything has been said without me and before me, anyway. I'm not even going to write a more detailed analysis to defend my views regarding the 'painfully average'. Shmviews.

I've said what I wanted to say.

This rewatch was an interesting experience.

"Skinner wants our report in one hour. What are you going to tell him?" — "What do you mean what am I going to tell him? I'm going to tell him exactly what I saw. What are you going to tell him?" — "I'll tell him exactly what I saw".

[kzmeru]

Aha I noticed your reqs were open so um... How would you feel about doing a Kaname/Reader fic where the reader is an idol and was a friend/lover of Kaname before the coma, but Kaname wakes up and they're not sure if Kaname would still love them after such a long time... And they avoid him because they're afraid of being rejected, but he still loves them even if they've changed a lot... And Kaname catches the reader later and re-confesses all his feelings to them, saying he doesn't want them to leave, and the reader accepts it.

HWLP ME THIS JS SO LONG . IM SO EMBARRASSING BYE. but if u happen to write it umm I'm sorry 😭😭😭 ahshahjdjs

- 🦦

i’d rather die than have to cry infront of you

# character : kaname tojo

— notes ; HI ! this took SO LONG IM SO SORRY but i hope this is what you expected .. i haven’t wrote anything in a hot min so it’s probably bad </3 BUT BRO THIS TURNED OUT TO BE SO LONG HELP (also kaname edit is by dailykaname on ig)

warning(s) : angst to fluff :3, idk tears are forming as i write this

"Good work, as usual, [Name]." Anzu cheered, handing you a cold glass of water. You could only return a tired smile at the Producer, as you practically chugged the drink down your throat.

Just another performance, is it not? A lump formed in your throat upon the thought of a 'performance'. Perhaps, it was something that you had wanted to stay far away from. Though, in the back of your mind, you knew that you wouldn't be able to, even if you tried.

"[Name]?" You finally heard the Producer's calls after several attempts of trying to grab your attention. Anzu gave you a look of worry, patting your back in hopes of reassurance.

"Ah, sorry… I spaced out. What's wrong?" She shakes her head, guiding you back to your personal dressing room, only to be greeted by a familiar blue-haired man.

That was Anzu's cue to leave. She politely excused herself with a bow and ran off to report the success of your performance.

"HiMERU," You gave the man a small nod. It was difficult to resist — the throbbing pain in your heart whenever you see him. You knew he isn't the person you love, and he knew that you caught on with his 'mission.'

HiMERU played his role as Kaname Tojo, your lover, the one you failed to protect. Though, all this pretending, and tricking your friends into believing that Kaname is well, felt wrong. The guilt was becoming too much to handle.

"Kaname's awake." Was all he said. Nothing else, no other explanation, leaving you in a state of multiple emotions at once.

Were you relieved? Happy? Of course, you had to be happy, right? But… why does it feel like you're more anxious than excited? Is it because it's been so long, that you're starting to doubt Kaname's love for you?

'Right, that has to be it… it has been quite a long time, hasn’t it? There's no way he'd still feel the same.' You thought, words refusing to come out of your mouth while HiMERU stood by the doorframe. He is just as shaken as you are.

"I'm… sorry, I—" Your attempt to leave immediately failed once your gaze locked with those familiar, bright yellow ones. The gaze that made you feel at home.

"[Name]…" Swearing that you heard Kaname's voice crack a little. You were scared, anxious and confused. The look on his face did not help with the extreme anxiety buried in your chest — though, the expression he had was unreadable.

"I have to go…" You simply said, hastily making your way to the other side of the building, in hopes of avoiding Kaname. 'Maybe,' you thought, 'It's for the best.'

Because things can't go back to the way it used to.

—

Kaname was confused, angry — not at you, but at himself. Why were you avoiding him? Why won't you let him talk? Did you not love him anymore?

He felt heavy. Everytime he tried approaching you, he'd be bombarded with excuses. Avoidance is something that he can't handle, especially when it comes to you.

This time, he isn't letting you get away that easily anymore.

"I'm sorry, Tojo… I can’t today. Huh? W-wait, what are you doing?!"

Kaname didn’t fail to catch the flustered look on your face when he had suddenly pushed you inside an empty room. He surpressed his giggle as your expression turned into a look of distress and panic.

"Hey! Seriously, I have to-.." You slowly gave in, growing silent as Kaname's gaze pierced into your soul. Nervously looking to the side to avoid eye contact, and to save you from the embarrassment, you swallowed the lump in your throat and motioned for the boy to speak.

"Why are you avoiding me?" He asked, with a slight shake in his voice. Was he trying to hold back his tears?

"Tojo—"

"No! My name isn't Tojo. So, stop calling me that It's Kaname, call me Kaname!" He snapped, holding you in place do that you wouldn't be able to escape.

"I just want to know why… you hate me…" Kaname looked down, hiding his face from you. He didn't want to let you catch a glimpse of the beads of tears forming in the corner of his eyes. He just wanted to know, why?

You were left speechless. Words weren't coming out, even if you attempted to speak by opening your mouth.

"…I still love you, [Name]. We loved each other! What went wrong…? Is it because I’ve been gone for so long that you found someone else?" Kaname finally found the courage to look up, tears that he had been holding back threatening to drop.

"Do you not love me anymore? Am I not 'your Kaname' anymore? Did you fall out of love?"

"Kaname,"

"I'm not accepting that! I don't want you to leave!"

"Kaname…"

"What? If you want me gone, just say it!"

"Kaname!"

There, he grew silent. He anticipated your reponse, yet, he felt scared. Are you going to leave him?

"S—…rry…" You choked out, letting the trapped tears escape. Kaname was taken aback. ‘I knew it’ he thought.

"I'm sorry! I was scared too… I didn’t know what to do! I thought you didn't love me anymore, so I avoided you to ease the pain…" You weren't even aware of how fast you spoke. It was silent for a while, until your shaking hands were comforted by Kaname's warm ones.

He scoffed, as if he was mocking you. "Are you stupid? I never even dreamt of leaving you!" A single teardrop escaped his eye, making him bury his face against the crook of your neck, his breath slightly tickling your neck.

"I love you." Kaname's embrace still felt so natural. He was warm, and made you feel so… safe.

"Nothing's changed,"

"So please, don't leave me…" He choked out a sob, relief washing all over his body when he felt your body relax against his.

"Please come back to me, [Name]…"

You sighed, placing your lips ontop of his head, giving him a quick peck before completely collpasing on the ground with his body draped against yours.

"I love you too, Kaname… I won't leave you, ever."

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Omg i havee SOOO much to tell and ask you its both sad and fun stuff, First off i wanna tell you that you are such an amazing person like seriously omggg how do u even exist like you must not be allowed away from heaven. Btw random: i heard u mention abt u in university so hows that going and whats ur majorr???? :)) And now the very very bad stuff: i messed up. not very uncommon you see, but very bad. my cousin whom i rllyyy love shes amazing shes like the andromeda to my sirius. nd my dad's side is very cruel to my mom before i ws born and they also shamed her for having a kid (my sis) that has problems (they refuse to tell me what it is but she has 2 problems idk the first one she has since birth and the second is that she had um.. men parts but when she was around 4/5 we founf out shes.. female? im a minor i rlly dont undersrand how ths works so..yeah. shes 8 now btw this year shes gonna be 9 y/o) basically very cruel people very very bad and so my cousin, whos from my dad's side, she came for like a sleepover thingy and my father commented on my mom's side and how they arent close to me even though they are my basucaly everything.. and in reply, i said how i like them and they are good and i said "my mums side is great... better than father side atlst" and she said "i can hear u yk" and i said that shes a excpetiion but when she wnt home she really felt upset and she had an exam but she stll didnt come to my house (my house is closer to her school so she stays here in exam time so it takes less tme in travelling) so my father cmpletly blamed me and now im so upset idek what to do i dont wanna apologize to her cz she doesnt know that i know that she said shes upset. my father confronted me about it and he got to jknow from my cousins mom so there was no direct contact but basically yeah thats it. i need help in what i should do to fix things again :( but this is the reason that simply talking wouldnt work and its rlly hard :( btw random: how do i start my microfic thing like do i just upoad a micfic or do i post smgthn else first if ykwim? another thing:

yeah idk but i think m bisexual and i have a bestfriend shes straight and supports lgbtq+ community but i rlly like her and cz were besties i dont wnanna ruin anything at all and im cool with how we r rn but at the same time i want more ykwim? and.. were like the touchy-feely kinda bestfriends so we hold hands n stuff as a joke nd people ship us and its so asdxdfgkhljhxx idek if i rlly like her as a frnd or i like her as in like like her.. but i also have a crush on a boy but it only lasts for 2 secs but when i see him again i start to thibk i like him again but my other rlly gud friend likes him so is it that i like hm and ignore my feelings js cs my frnd liks him or do i just like him as frnds,, idek were close we play games togheter n stuff but thtas about it..

also have i mentioned how much of an angel you are??? i literally scream and jump off a cliff casually when u reply to my texts <333 ilysm ur such a great person <333

xoxo, sweet potato <33

hi!

Aww you're so sweet! I'm not in university anymore, at least not in the traditional sense: I'm working on my master's degree. It's going.....not terrible lol. I'm majoring in ESL Education (English as a Second Language).

For your first question: I think this is a really good example of how talking through other people isn't the best solution. Do you have any way of getting in contact with your cousin directly? Because things are definitely going to be changed and exaggerated if you are talking through your aunt and dad. Once you talk to her, be truthful. Be sincere and tell her how important she is to you. I'm betting she'll come around.

For microfics: Nope, just go for it! You don't have to do anything beforehand, just start! I can't wait to see what you write!

For the last part: First, are you sure you friend is straight? If she definitely is, then yeah, it might not be worth it to say anything? But I mean, you could always try bringing it up casually. Like "Oh, I think you're really pretty!" and see what happens?

With the guy- I know it sounds cliche, but if your friend likes him, stay away. I've been there. I've seen friendships fall apart. It's not worth it, especially since you're not even sure of your feelings. I know I probably sound like a parent, here, but there was a full-on FEUD I experienced in eighth grade because two people were fighting over a guy and....yeah.

Thank you so much for the compliments, you're so nice!! <3 I hope you have a great day!