#one was my best friend in elementary school
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cherry jubilee with macklin!!!
'tis the damn season taylor
road not taken | macklin celebrini x ex gf!reader
♡ summary: everyone dated someone in elementary school. these relationships never lasted. macklin and y/n were no different. after all, their “dates” were just going to the park and drinking caprisuns or sitting on his couch watching pokemon. their “relationship” was just playing together at recess and y/n giving a short kiss on the cheek after his games. but even after their “break-up”, they were still good friends, until he moved in 2019. it’s been years now, with no contact, but now he’s coming back to vancouver to play the canucks.
♡ pairing: macklin celebrini x reader
♡ content: fluff, angst, insecure!macklin
♡ word count: 3k
♡ warnings: none
♡ prompt: ‘tis the damn season - taylor swift
♡ note: this was written with interspersed breaks of holiday inflatables.
♡ taglist: @devilinpradaheels @Summert158 @lekkerfrikandelletje @camiesully
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
“so, hometown game,” will began, “how are you feeling?”
“i don’t know. it’s been my goal to be in the nhl, but now, i’m playing against my childhood team.”
“on your other childhood team.”
“the sharks don’t count.”
“i mean, you were a kid when you moved here.”
“the sharks don’t count.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin sat on the couch, with y/n. it had been such a big day. they had just wrapped up sixth grade, the end of elementary school.
“whatcha thinking about?” she asked, looking up from where she nestled at his side.
“us.”
“specifically?”
“i don’t know. i just like being your friend.”
“i like being your friend too.”
“it’s nice.”
“remember when we got married in your backyard?”
“y/n, don’t remind me.”
“you called me mrs celebrini for a month, until you forgot.”
“didn’t you ask aiden to help you divorce me?”
“maybe.”
“but look at us now.”
“do you wanna go run in the sprinkler.”
“is that even a question?”
she grabbed his hand and they ran next door to her house, into her backyard. her little sister was already playing in the sprinkler, overjoyed to see y/n and macklin.
it was going to be a nice summer.
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
he had grown used to the mics all around him, all the time. that was the nature of being 1st overall, a star rookie, a standout player. he had grown used to the world knowing all about his life, his family, feeling like they were entitled to know more than what was already out on the internet.
“macklin! how do you feel about playing the canucks tomorrow?”
”were you excited about going to california?”
“did you miss vancouver?”
“are you excited to be back?”
“i never wanted to leave.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
“macklin, you’re so weird.”
“no, i’m not!”
“yeah, you are. you’re always with y/n.”
“and?”
“is she your girlfriend or something?”
“not anymore.”
“not anymore? so not even she wants to date you?”
“it’s not like that!”
“do you wish you were dating her?”
“i- she’s my best friend!”
“guys, macklin’s in love with y/n!”
“no, i’m not!”
“loser!”
macklin was quiet the whole car ride home from practice. everything said was true. he was weird. y/n was not his girlfriend anymore. not even she wanted to date him. he did wish he was dating her. he was in love with y/n.
“mom?”
“yes, dear?”
“how did you know you were in love with dad?”
“well, we went to school together and he was just super sweet.”
“would you be sad if he had moved?”
“macklin.”
“mom, it’s an honest question.”
“of course i would’ve been sad. he might not have gotten the chance to tell me how he felt.”
macklin let out a quiet sob. clearly, his situation was hopeless.
“what’s wrong, dear?”
“we’re moving in a few months. and i’ll be in c-california and y/n will be here.”
“i know she’s your friend, but you can make more friends down there.”
“mom, i have a crush on y/n!”
“oh my. now, that’s different.”
“and i can’t do anything about it because we’re moving!”
“mack, don’t start that. you know how much your father’s new job will help our family.”
“i’m her best friend too! she’ll have no one!”
“that’s not true. y/n is a little social butterfly.”
“i can’t leave her here.”
“i get that you’re having all these feelings, but you’re 12. you’ll meet other girls.”
“they aren’t her.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin sat on his bed in the hotel in vancouver. will was setting up his toiletries in the bathroom.
“it’s nice of them to let us stay a little bit after,” will said, trying to lighten the mood.
“yeah.”
“mack, are you okay? you’ve been moping this whole time.”
“it’s weird, will. this was my team. some of these guys were playing when i still lived here. i’ve seen quinn hughes play here.”
“and now you’re playing against him.”
“it’s weird!”
“there’s something else bugging you.”
“i’m fine.”
“mack, you can talk to me. we’re best friends.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
mom: look what i found
mom: attachment: one image
mom: i heard she’s going to be there
mack: ok?
mack: i haven’t talked to her since middle school.
mack: i don’t care.
mom: don’t give me that
mom: you two were best friends
mom: you should care a little bit
mack: i don’t
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
“c’mon, let’s go explore.”
“i don’t need to explore. i know this city.”
“how long has it been since you’ve been back? c’mon, macklin, let’s go.”
“fine.”
macklin and will made their way out of the hotel, ready to go out on the town.
“do you think you’ll recognize anyone?”
“i hope not.”
will must’ve spoken that into being or something, because right as they turned that corner, mack walked right into someone he knew.
“oh my god, macklin???”
“y/n?” his y/n. “are you okay?”
“yeah, i’m okay.”
“you guys know each other?” will asked, looking between y/n and mack.
“yeah… yeah, we do.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin couldn’t breathe. y/n had her head on his shoulder, her hands fidgeting in her lap. they were laying in the grass of her backyard, looking up at the vancouver sky together for the last time.
“do you really have to go?”
“i’d stay if i could.”
“you could stay with my family.”
“i don’t think your dad would like that.”
“it’d be fine.”
“he’d make me sleep on the porch.”
“that’s better than you being in stupid sacramento.”
“san francisco.”
“doesn’t matter. it’s not vancouver. it’s not next to me.”
“it’ll be good for hockey.”
“really? leaving vancouver will be good for hockey?”
“i’m sorry, y/n.”
“it’s fine.”
“no, it’s not.”
“macklin, you leave tomorrow. i can’t do anything about it.”
he laced his fingers in hers. “i’m sorry.”
“do you want to spend the night?”
“tonight?”
“well, you won’t be here tomorrow night.”
the two kids giggled as macklin pulled y/n to her feet and they ran inside.
“mom!”
“what is it?”
“can macklin spend the night?”
“tonight?”
“mom, he’s leaving!”
“i suppose. make good choices.”
she took his hand and walked upstairs to her room, the fairy lights creating a warm, inviting feel.
“i don’t have my pajamas.”
“lucky for you, you can’t remember to bring your stuff home.”
y/n opened a drawer, full of his stuff.
“that’s where it all went!”
he took a hoodie and pair of shorts and went to the bathroom to change. y/n put on one of mack’s big shirts, the fabric swallowing her whole. his dad had bought it a few sizes big on accident and never got around to returning it.
“y/n? are you decent?”
“yeah!”
macklin came back in. “remind me to steal my clothes back.”
“nah.”
“you’re the worst.”
they climbed underneath the fluffy pink duvet and just couldn’t stop giggling. “you’re my best friend.”
“you’re my best friend too, mack. always have been.”
“always will be?”
“nah, you’re ditching me and for what? the sharks?”
“y/n, please be serious.”
“of course, you’ll always be my best friend. will i always be yours?”
“duh.”
and there they laid, in y/n’s bed. they just talked and talked, planning visits and to reunite after high school. macklin shared how nervous he was, how badly he wanted to stay with his team, his home, her. y/n listened, her fingers tracing flowers and stars on his arm.
“what if you forget me?”
“like anything else is worth remembering.”
“i’m being real.”
“i won’t. but i have a real concern about you forgetting me.”
“i could never.”
“whatever you say, mr. hockey star.”
“y/n, i could the next mcdavid and wouldn’t forget you.”
“you say that now.”
“not even crosby could forget someone like you.”
“i’m sure he did. cole harbour is a lot smaller than pittsburgh.”
“he definitely visits.”
“yes, but everyone knows crosby. everyone knows mcdavid. everyone knows gretzky.”
“no one knows celebrini.”
“they will. but no one knows l/n.”
“i do.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
somehow, he’d ended up across the table from y/n at a little coffee shop. her hair was longer, her cheekbones more defined. she was more grown-up, but at the same time, the same girl he left here.
“so, what are you doing back in vancouver?” he asked, not looking up from his water.
“winter break.”
“where are you going to school?”
“university of toronto. great psychology program.”
“nice. i’m here for the game.”
“i know.”
“you do?”
“everyone knows, macklin.”
“so you knew i was on the sharks?”
“i didn’t stop following hockey when you left.”
“you never said anything after the draft.”
“what would i have said? hey macklin, sorry i haven’t reached out since we were thirteen. congrats on going first.”
“that would’ve been something.”
“i’m not the one who gave up.”
“are you saying i did?”
“i’m saying maybe the u14 aaa junior sharks had a little something to do with it.”
“don’t act like that, y/n!”
“you know, i thought for the longest time, maybe hockey just kept you busy and i shouldn’t take it personally. but then i saw that blonde in all your posts.”
“y/n, you don’t get it.”
“this is stupid. why did i bother? you’ve changed, i’ve changed. can’t expect a guy to remember you when he’s got a new toy.”
she stood up and took her espresso with her. “bye mack.”
“no y/n, come back.”
“why?”
“you can’t villainize me for dating someone else. we were friends. and you definitely dated people too.”
“so, let’s call it even. fresh start. i’m here for a few days. let’s catch up, clean slate.”
“i’m going home. you know where to find me.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
“dude, you got a date or what?”
“or what?”
“is it with that girl.”
“yep.”
“who is she?”
“y/n l/n. my best friend.”
“ouch.”
“sorry, will, she came first.”
“bros before hoes, mack.”
“will, there’s pictures of us in her bathtub in her mom’s scrapbook.”
“damn.”
macklin took a look in the mirror to adjust his tie. “how do i look?”
“snappy.”
“i’ll see you around.”
“use protection!”
“shut up, dude!”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
he stood in front of that familiar house, with the cream walls, the wrap around porch, and the brown door. mrs. l/n’s lavender bushes were still bright and vibrant, even after all these years. he raised his fist and knocked on the door. mr. l/n opened it, his eyes wide in shock.
“macklin?”
“is y/n home?”
he turned inside. “y/n! you have a gentleman caller!”
y/n appeared shortly after, in a little black dress and satin pumps. her makeup was perfect and her hair was in a cute half-up, half-down.
“speak of the devil.”
macklin quickly hugged her, his strong arms wrapping around her waist. “missed you.”
“missed you too, big guy.”
“y/n, honey, did you arrange this?”
“yeah, we ran into each other earlier.”
“i see.”
“bye, dad.”
“make good choices.”
she stepped outside, her car keys in hand. she adjusted her purse on her shoulder and switched her keys to the other hand, so she could hold macklin’s.
“so, lily had to use the car for some outing with her boyfriend.”
“so…”
“we’re taking the truck.”
“that’s your dad’s baby!”
“i’m his baby, thank you very much.”
macklin helped y/n into the cab of the truck. “why’d he spring for such tall tires? he works in finance.”
“i barely understand the guy.”
she put the key into the ignition and put her bag in macklin’s lap. “thanks for being my passenger princess tonight.”
“yeah, your dad would kill me if i touched the wheel.”
after she turned the headlights on, she looked over at mack. in his eyes, she saw the same boy who held her hand under the stars, who threatened the playground bullies, who kissed her in order to steal the last cookie. she shook her head like an etch-a-sketch to erase the thought.
“where do you want to go?”
“we could just ride around.”
y/n put the truck in reverse and backed out of the driveway, turning onto the street.
“you’re trouble, celebrini.”
“yeah, but you love it.”
“i missed it.”
“what’d you do without me?”
“cried.”
“actually?”
“yeah.”
“i’m sorry.”
“blame your dad.”
“hey.”
“not like you wanted to leave anyway.”
“i missed you a lot too. california’s got nothing on you.”
“don’t lie.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
“y/n, did you hear?”
“hear what?” ”macklin’s supposed to be the top draft pick.”
“who?”
“celebrini? our old neighbor?”
“oh, him? cool, i guess.”
that was all anyone ever talked about. her mom, still close friends with robyn would never stop gushing about how great macklin was at hockey. the other people in her grade were thoroughly impressed that someone from little vancouver was going first, as if connor bedard hadn’t done it last year, as if macklin still lived here.
“didn’t you guys date?”
“yeah, in fourth grade.”
“but weren’t you friends?”
“not anymore.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin celebrini and will smith - two peas in a pod
celebrini and smith - star rookies and best friends
will and macklin - how their friendship is shaping sharks hockey
“i can’t believe this.” y/n said, flopping onto the bed in her dorm. “i’ve truly been replaced.”
“when did you last see each other?” lena, her roommate asked.
“not the point.”
“what’s the point then?”
“he said i’d always be his best friend.”
“didn’t he say that he’d never forget you too?”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin was chatting with will during warm ups when he noticed a sign with his face on it. the sign read “hey #71! i’ll trade you a kiss for a puck!” and had many, many hearts drawn on it.
he skated up to them and said “i need to see your face first!”
they dropped the sign reveal y/n. she made half of a hand heart, which macklin completed.
“meet me by the player tunnel after. name drop me. i’ll get you that kiss!”
“good luck! score a goal for me!”
“i’ll score five!”
macklin did, in fact, not score five goals. he scored two, which was good enough for y/n. she was let into the area by the locker rooms and waited patiently for macklin. eventually, he came out, his hair wet with water from his post game shower. his tie was askew, but that didn’t matter. this macklin - her macklin (not that she’d say that out loud) - looked the same as that macklin, the one who insisted she come to all of his games. he had that same glimmer in his eyes, the same smile when he saw her.
“so about that kiss?” she said, batting her eyelashes.
“i have something to say first.”
“i have something to say too.”
“one?”
“two.”
“three.”
“I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU!”
“you are?”
“since when?”
“y/n, i’ve been in love with you since we were ten and you asked me to be your boyfriend after grayson julian said she wanted to be my girlfriend. i remember you saying you couldn’t lose your best friend to someone mean like her. i loved you through every bad test, every argument over google slides templates for projects, every mile we had to run in pe. i loved you every mile i flew away. i loved you with every goal i scored, every assist i did, every pass i made. i loved you in san francisco, i loved you in minnesota, i loved you in chicago, i loved you in boston, i love you in san jose, and i love you here, in vancouver, if you’ll have me.”
“macklin celebrini, i am so extremely mad at you.”
“you are?”
“you ghosted me a week after you landed in california!”
“i didn’t know how to manage a relationship at age 13, much less a long distance one!”
“you’re such an idiot.”
“i know, i feel really stupid.”
“but you’re my idiot.”
“i am?”
“mack, i’ve been in love with you since we were nine and we were drinking caprisuns on my couch. i couldn’t get the straw to poke a whole and you took the pouch and did it for me. i was in love with you when you lost games and tournies, when you got picked on for being bad at math, and when we watched the stars in the backyard. i never stopped loving you.”
⋆˚☆˖°⋆。° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚
macklin couldn’t breathe. y/n had her head on his shoulder, her hands fidgeting in her lap. they were laying in the grass of her backyard, looking up at the vancouver sky together.
“i didn’t want to leave. but i couldn’t stay.”
“mack…”
“if i could’ve stayed, i would’ve. i would’ve slept on your porch and given up hockey if i meant i could stay here, with you.”
“you don’t need to do that.”
“but i would. if i had a time machine, i’d go back and convince my parents to stay.”
“no.”
“what?”
“if you did, things would be different. yes, we might’ve dated in high school, but we also might’ve lost each other.”
“i guess you’re right.”
“aren’t you glad you kept your options open?”
“yeah,” he kissed her cheek, “i really am.”
“the road not taken is looking really good right now.”
“does it?”
“mhm… he’s tall with perfectly tousled hair and probably abs.”
“i’ve got abs.”
“prove it.”
“you’re terrible!”
“you love me!”
“yeah, i do.”
“we could just sleep out here.”
“it’s december in canada. we’re going inside.”
“sounds good, babe.”
“babe?”
“you like it?”
“love it.”
and with that, he took her hand, pulling her to her feet and into his arms. he slipped one hand behind her head, the other one to her waist.
“i think i still owe you that kiss.”
#౨ৎ azure writes <3#azure's ice cream parlor <3#nhl#nhl players#nhl imagine#nhl fanfiction#nhl x reader#san jose sharks#sj sharks#sharks#macklin celebrini#mc71
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An Important announcement ⭐️
So as some of you may know, though I’m not quite sure if I’ve said this before but before I was a writer on here I was an editor (still do sometimes). And I found out about tumblr from a friend @slut4milfsss who’s not active anymore :(. Basically she used her work piece for the intro in one of her edit and I was like “ I need to know where I can read that” and she directed me over here. And honestly at first I had absolutely no business or urge to write fics…. Until there were barely any Marilyn thornhill fanfics on here at the time, hence the reason for my username so I began writing my own fics and over time I eventually started writing on different characters/fandoms.
I’ve loved writing since I was in elementary school but my love really grew in high school, and I loved literature and I had that fattest crush on my professor Ms. Lane who’s now Mrs. Cambridge ( don’t worry guys she knows and she’s honestly fine with my little story lmao). Growing up with parents who had money wasn’t always the nicest experience, most of the time I used writing as a coping mechanism with my depression and anxiety.
Graduating high school a bit early,and then before going to college I took a gap year to really decide what I wanted to do with my life and I decided whole heartedly on psychology! But anyway cut the long story short, I’ve had this app for 2 1/2 years which is crazy because it feels like yesterday when my writing started getting recognition. I’m honestly so proud of the work I did and the friends and amazingly talented and supportive writer buddies I’ve come across but unfortunately I’m not 18, 21 and 23 anymore next year (2025) I’m gonna be 25….😭😔. Time flew so much! I literally remember my high school days, college days and university days as well as my gap year in London so well.
I’m a clinical psychologist and in June I did my final course exams and I’m now officially an badge clinical psychologist with my own office in NYC and let’s just say I love my job it has a deeper meaning behind it and waking up everyday and getting the privilege to meet and therapy patients struggling with their MH and working along side some of the best doctors has always been my dream. Recently I’ve started another short course work in neuroscience and it’s so intriguing. Trust me wasting your 20’s away in degrees is not boring it’s worth it.
With that being said. This year wasn’t the best or easiest year for me. Don’t even get me started on 2023.I’ve got a lot of good things going for me right now, new friends, for the summer I traveled to L.A, I went to one the the VP’s rally where I got a picture with her, new experiences and most of all I think I may have met the love of my life! <3. And now going into 2025 I need space and a little breather. I wanna do some new stuff, I wanna travel and I wanna be happy with friends and family and work on some personal relationships and most importantly myself.
With that being said I will be taking a break from tumblr and taking a step back from this account and writing in general . I don’t know when I’ll be back or if I’ll ever be be back (that’s not decisive as yet for now I promise it’s just a break) I’ve taken breaks before, especially before my CPB exams and some random anon people decided to bash me in my own anon box as if I don’t have a life of my own….. but anywaysss I know I have a bunch of requests in my inbox which I will try to get through while I’m away along with CHP 10 the finale of my lady d series. I do love writing for you guys and this app has been my safe place and just a place of peace, smiles, experiences and growth, and I don’t know why I feel like I’m out growing my jacket. But I do want to focus on certain areas in my life now before I make decisions I don’t want to. I’ll always come back and reblog and share my love and support once in a while so don’t worry.
So To all my favorite writers @regalbootie @daydream-cement @prettygreenpills @littledollll @cissyenthusiast010155 @v3nusxsky @d4rkhold @wifeofnatasharomanoff @milfsloverblog @brienneoftarth1989 @willalovexx @daddy-heather-dunbar @togrowoldinv @kararomanoff @harksness @weemssapphic @storiesofsvu2-0 @schemmentigfs @ottiliaxwritten @ilovehugslikealotalot @m1lfsh4ke @gamma-rae-bursts , more in numbers than I can ever tag ( sorry if I didn’t tag you! I literally can’t remember the rest) , sorry for the random tag as well guys 😭☹️ but I do wanna say a small heart felt thank you, not only for being the most generous, genuine, kind, supportive, authentic, optimistically talented writers I’ve ever encountered but for just doing what you do, being a writer can be so hard and it takes endless courage but you guys manage to come through regardless. I remember reading some of you guys work and was in constant awe, most of my motivation and will power to write and be inspired came from you guys. And to my mutuals…. @willalovexx @luisa323 @milkiedimitrescu @m1lfsh4ke @gamma-rae-bursts @mymiraclewitch @kmaxmadness (and again sorry if I forgot anyone) Words cannot describe how much I love you guys. My love pours out beyond words, I will always cherish the continuous amount of love, generosity and support you all have given me. Especially the love you showed to me in times of anon hate and towards my fanfics. I truly did enjoy my time on this app all the fun times 😂 and most definitely the comments. I’ve made so many friends on here like Heidi who deactivated her account sadly but we are still so close and talk everyday on instagram.
I forbid any tears from this post!😤 but I really do love you guys and I will always think of each and everyone of you. And I wish nothing but the best for all you!🤍🌸. Remember to stay true to yourselves, go out with friends, fall in love, do silly things, give yourself a reason, do what makes you happy! Always…. And please do take breaks. Don’t write your life away when there’s so many amazing opportunities, experiences and people waiting. The world is waiting, the life than you want is waiting. Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, wishing everyone a very heart felt holidays and happy new year!🎆🎊
— sincerely, your best friend.
#fanfic#love#i love you guys so much😭💞💫🤭🌟#ill still support my fav writers. ill reblog and like!#writer appreciation
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i actually feel like crying. it should be illegal to drift apart from your friends
#there are these 2 girls i went to school with#one was my best friend in elementary school#and the other was my best friend for all of middle school#and in high school i started drifting apart from the middle school one#but THEY randomly got really close in like 11th grade#and they’re still best friends now and post together all the time#(i actually rarely EVER go on personal social medias but whenever i see a post from one of them i always check up on what theyve been doing)#(in like a lovingly curious way not a creepy way)#and them being friends has NOTHING to do with me like i stopped being close w both of them before they ever even became aware of each other#well it’s actually kind of ironic bc while i always loved my friend from elementary school my middle school bff kind of hated her#and in middle school i would’ve given ANYTHING for the three of us to hang out#so it’s kind of i guess bittersweet? that they’re friends now#again i haven’t been close to either of them for years and years but it’s still just strange to me that they are so close#i don’t really think i’m jealous (?) because we are very different people and i don’t know if i’d even like being friends with them anymore#but i do kind of miss them and the friendships we used to have if that makes sense#it’s more like a longing for what USED to be rather than a desire to be part of what they have now#also like i said it’s still just weird and hard to conceptualize them being such good friends now
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i think the last 5 days of my life have been a hallucination
#1. brother hospitalized with no discharge date in sight#2. wiplash of international travel -> dogsitting -> hosting guests at my house#3. at work i’ve got people pushing promotions and all these job opportunities at me#4. got a call from the lady i dogsat for apparently the amazon driver ran over my work phone that i dropped in her driveway yesterday???????#(meaning it sat outside during the rain all last night?? and it still works LMFAO)#5. best friend called in tears bc she made a mistake and is now getting run out of her rec volleyball league for it which is her whole#community#6. speaking of community fighting my ass off to keep my neighborhood elementary school from being voted to close down tomorrow?????#7. speaking of schools one of my students had a med emergency and we had to get her in an ambulance last thursday and i had to#manage the rest of the kids to keep them from freaking out and they’re still all freaked from it#LITERALLY CAN WE ALL JUST LIKE CHILL#i need to clean my house before my friend comes to stay with me tomorrow wtf#oh and 2 days after she leaves i fly home for thanksgiving 🙃 god knows what that’ll be like
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also. amber gris as a character is really important to me as an appalachian.
not just her accent or the specific type of person justin based her off of but like
the feeling of losing someone to addiction/overdose while the government does nothing to help, just criminalizes and stigmatizes and makes things worse. which obviously happens in more places than just around here, but we have one of the highest rates of overdose death in the whole country and that whole set of scenes felt like they were really informed by growing up around that
#eliot posts#taz#taz ethersea#the adventure zone#amber gris#drugs cw#death mention#i've made posts like this and deleted them cuz i never feel like i'm wording it just right but just. god.#i'm lucky enough to have never been addicted or to have a best friend or immediate family member die from it#but i've lost or nearly lost extended family to it#and it's like.#my own accent isn't that thick and neither is my immediate family's or best friends'#but i've known ppl who talked like her.#specifically a man named larry who lived with us when we were real young#for some reason especially the way amber says ''come on'' just always reminds me so strongly of larry's voice. he said that phrase a lot#he was the one who taught me to tie my shoes even after my parents lost patience with me for being 'too old' to not understand#he drank excessively like my dad did but he never got mean with us kids#he came and went a few times over the years. the final time he left was when i was in late elementary#he died of an overdose when i was in high school. i didn't feel much of anything at the time.#it had been so long since i'd seen him but also i was at a point in my life where i'd've been numb to big emotions like that anyway#so my parents got drunk about it and i did nothing. just went to school and shit as usual.#i did not expect those feelings to get dredged up by a goddamned comedy dnd podcast#but they did it well i think#even though i had to pause it to take a breather multiple times. i enjoyed it overall. cathartic i guess?
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Fellow TUC fans: how and when did you first find the series?
#i was around gregor's age when i first read them#my older brother was the first one to find them#then he read them and introduced them to my aunt who is a (now retired) elementary school librarian#both of them loved them so much and passed the love on to me by highly recommending them#then i made it my mission to never shut up about them to my friends#my now best friend sarafina read them way back when because they wanted to get to know me better after we met in social studies#and i think that's SO sweet#they loved the books too#so this was probably like... 2005? and the books have been so important to me and so near and dear to my heart ever since#tuc#tuc20#the underland chronicles
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So I was thinking about that modern AU, trying to figure out how to incorporate FCG because robot (literally he's just a pastors son. Duh)
but for some reason my brain said "Ashton's service dog" first. Then I thought about Ashton needing a service dog because of brain stuff. THEN I thought about Ashton needing a service animal AND a mobility aid.
So I'm just living for Ashton in a wheelchair rolling through school. They've got the key to the elevator. They've obviously got a whole dog at school that people try desperately not to pet.
When someone decides to bully FCG (Francis Charles Grady) or Laudna, they get out of their chair to their full height. People freak because they didn't know he could walk or stand. Ashton just shrugs because "you know what they say about assuming"
And when Dorian shows up and asks about it not as tactfully as he probably meant to Ashton pops a wheely and is just like "what's sadder than an orphan with a wheelchair and a service dog? Unfortunately it didn't get me adopted. People just don't want their inspiration porn in house anymore I guess."
And they try to be chill. They try to avoid those harsh topics with their friends because they don't wanna be a bummer. It'd bring down the mood to say "sure I can walk but sometimes my spine is on fire and my calves are full of knives so I don't." It'd suck to say "I can walk fine until I can't." It's not relatable to say "my whole body hurts all the time and if I want to be able to do other things like think, I should probably be sitting."
Slowly their friends get them to understand that they don't have to put on a brave face for them. They don't have to pretend like it doesn't hurt. They don't have to pretend like it doesn't bother them. Their friends care about them. Hell they're even down to help if they can. Anything to make Ashton feel like they are wanted, that they're not a burden.
#silver sending stones#ashton greymoore#yeah i know its fucking weird about fcg being a dog#i was like “thats fucked up thats a person” so i looked at their class and was like#oh shit thats a pastors son#thats butters#FCG hovers around them because in the third grade (when ashton still walked around school) ashton beat a kid up that made him c ry#so theyve been beat friends ever since#and people dont get it but they dont have to#ashton once ran over a dudes foot because he was making fun of laudnas shirt for having holes in it#and she was glued to him ever sinxe#the alliances forged in elementary school and middle school are ones that will live with us forever#fearne is the new kid who comes from like. Catholic school.#shes so clueless and so sheltered she asked what rhe chair was for first day#and ashton said “legs dont work” and she said “got it” and hasnt said anything since#imogen sits next to laudna in biology and they start to get close because no one else would partner up with them for labs#imogen and orym are both ffa kids and when imogen starts hanging with laudna and her friends she invite orym#who just lost his best friend after a tornado so hes like “fuck it maybe i should make some friends”#and theyre a cute little hodge podge group when Dorian moves from way out of town#i think him and fearne are both going to be theatre kids so fearne is like “omg. youre so nice you have to meet my friends”#then the whole group is here!! except for c pop#i thought maybe a teacher or oryms dad but i gate all of that#idk man we'll see
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HI TUMBLRR it’s me
#I ate ramen just now it was soooo god I think ramen is just it just is better after 10pm#im right#ughhh ok that actually reminded me earlier my classmate was making an Asian people eat dogs joke like he put on this awful accent and he wa#all like ‘dog tastes so good with rice’ and then he did other stuff too#but what really made me upset is that someone who I thought was my friend found it really humorous! wow okay!#I know it’s not really a big deal but im still kind of sad like I’ve lost all my respect for you now#anddd they were my only friend in the class so now I’m stuck there for the rest of the semester I guess . I mean I’ll still be nice to them#but I just don’t think I can bring myself to like them anymore sorryyy . not really . but kind of#idk if I’m overreacting . in elementary school though people would make jokes actually about me eating dog and it always made me really sad#but I never held it against them cause we were children#but now I feel like you’re old enough to know what you’re laughing at..#wow ok this really derived away from me being on tumblr and having just ate the worlds best ramen#well . not really I mean it was good but I’m allergic to normal noodles and I need to eat rice noodles and they’re not bad I just don’t lik#them as much Lol#I feel like my actual posts say nothing but if anyone ever reads the tags they probably know everything about me..#I use tumblr to complain half the time loll and I used to post my drawings more but I haven’t made any good drawings recently😭😭😭BUT WAIT!#i have a comic I’ll post in October we’ll see how far I am in it by then…#im like . halfway done with chapter oneeeee so maybe like I’ll post all of chapter one on hallowern.. how does that sound… cause actually#for those of you who don’t know my story has ghosts in it#im like trying to keep it a little silly right now but the tone might shifftttt idk!!!!! we’ll seeeeeeee cause actually I have NOT worked#out the entire plot.. just like. most of it.#but I keep having ideas like midway through ughhh it’s an endless cycle!!!!!#like Francis . she used to be a random character who shows up once but then I was like . wait no! anjali should have ghost friends! and tha#that’s how Francis came to be#and actually today I kind of finalized her design^_^ albeit in my math notebook lol
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it is bad when i am in my feels enough to return to the abandoned poetry archives
#personal#roommates were playing hannah montana stuff and got to butterfly fly away and i was like omg butterfly fly away… bc i sang that song in#second grade for the school talent show so i was like wait i want to find the recording now and went thru the facebook™️ (obviously this#was a bad idea) anyway did not manage to find the recording but did find an abundance of other things that made me want to cry lmao. such#as images of my and my elementary school best friends all squished together lying on my bed with drawing supplies and wand boxes cluttered#at the bottom just barely in the frame and a selfie one of my middle school friends#took with me and then two of my other friends are laughing in the background and like 11yo me#posing arms fully out in front of a christmas tree smile so excited idont think anyone even told me to pose like that and then a photo a few#after that of my little brother next to me imitating it and pictures of going swimming with friends etc etc like.#life was so full of life back then. i don’t know what happened.
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If The Core Division Three Members Had Gaming Channels...
Kafka Hibino {A.K.A ComfyManGaming}: Mainly Shop Management Sims or just Sims in general. His most popular series and the one that let him go full time as a content creator was his Power Wash sim Story Time where he got to talk about the craziest things that happened to him in his, like, six different cleaning jobs. ( In order; Landscaper, personal maid service, High rise window washer [tied for origin for most of his craziest stories], Nuclear Power Plant Office janitor, Failed attempt at running his own power wash service, and School Janitor with a car detail side job. {Most recent/longest held job/and also tied for craziest story origin generator with Car Detail Horror stories being second). Can be convinced to play atmospheric games like Journey/Abzu/Fire Watch/Anything thought provoking or emotional.
Reno Ihchikawa{A.K.A IchyChill Breakdowns}: Whatever Windette does, but with less insults. Basically Build Breakdowns and Speedrun Tutorials. Carried with the energy of a tired Indian Math teacher trying to teach calculus to 8th graders. Is also [technically] a PNG tuber, but because he's low energy, the PNG doesn't move much.
Iharu Haruichi {A.K.A SharkBAIT}: Two Channels. One is a horror game channel, Both Indi and Triple A. The other is anything casual, but mainly sticks to Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, Coral Island, that sort of thing. Fans like to call the Horror one Anxiety and the non-horror one Anti-Anxiety(Each have their own mascots and like to fight each other like Jacksepticeye and Antisepticeye). He has absolutely accidentally cross posted horror vids onto the non horror channel and vice-versa. The community like to pretend that they don't interact with the other channels and when that sort of thing happens, they pretend they've been exposed to horrors beyond comprehension. (yes, even when the horror channel gets a cutesy vid)
Mina Ashiro{ A.K.A Can(n)onGodess/Pr3ttyW1ttl3K1tty}: Also Two channels, but actively makes sure that no one knows she runs both. One is a live stream of FPS set up as no-commentary/with camera (Mainly colorful ones like Valorant). The other is also no commentary with NO camera and its Sim 3 or 4 tips-and-tricks and Minecraft Aesthetic House Build (Mod and No Mod.)
Kikrou Shinomya:{A.K.A Can_It_Doom?} A STEM major that couldn't find a use for her degree as fast as she liked, so she started a Can it Run Doom? channel as a joke, and now it's evolved into a channel where people recommend different setups like Drumset Controler on a Texas TI-84 Graphing Calculator. (Is also currently in the middle of working on a live action Tank Setup for World of Tanks as a subscriber goal.)
Hoshina Soshiro{A.K.A SwordSingerSUPREME} Any game that involves sword fighting and critiques it either Accurately or HARSHLY. Also streams his HEMA training/tournaments. It's very popular (because everyone find him hot) and has since become a bit of an eclectic channel that is split between his Gaming vids, his HEMA vids, and P.O Box unboxing vids where people send him A LOT of gifts. There's also an over an hour video of him playing Let's Hit Each Other With Fake Swords the Card Game with his older brother (who is also in HEMA.) that he made when the channel hit 5 million subscribers.
✨Bonus✨
Gen Narumi{A.K.A xXGenNarumi420Xx}: Plays anything that's currently trending, but his bread and butter is FPS or Run and Guns. (Has confessed to saying "Would" to the Ultrakill Robot.)
Okonogi Konomi{A.K.A BlossomBear}: Indi VTuber that plays exclusively Indi Puzzle games or Puzzle Platformers. Isn't a singing VTuber so much as one that can and will go in-depth on programming and what goes into a VTube model (She made hers and it has two forms : a chibi, curly white haired, anthro bear girl and a white plushi version with orange blossom motifs.) Can and has demonstrated to be an absolute GOD at Minesweeper
Minase{A.K.A MinAction}: A anime/movie/Western Animation reaction channel. Has an uncanny habit of predicting things before they should be obvious.
Hakua{A.K.A HakuaKooksXP} A cooking channel whose shtick is 1000 Ways To Prepare [Insert Food Here.]. She's still currently working her way through rice.
Haruichi Izumo {Goes by his name} Various product review channel.
Aoi Kaguragi {Also goes by his name} A very well made workout channel.
#Kafka held two school janitor positions. One in an elementary and the other in a University.#He gained some internet fame before his channel existed when he interrupted a group of kids Livestreaming Pokemon in the public bathroom#They were stuck on a boss when Kafka came in.#He then proceeded to decimate the boss with the same setup the group was considering tossing out for being to underpowered.#Was friends with Mina in elementary. Passed by an advertisement that said she would be showing up at a convention and decided to stop by.#This was before his channel took off. They found it ironic they became professional gamers now.#He runs a plus sized friendly merch store with a couple novelty items.#One subscriber sent Hoshina a 4XL hoodie as a joke. He thought it was funny too until he put on the hoodie.#Has confessed to sleeping in it and it hasn't failed to show up for a stream once. There are even reports that he brings it to HEMA events.#It got to the point that Kafka custom ordered and sent Hoshina a comically large coffee mug for his birthday.#Its about the size of an Oktoberfest mug and it made Hoshina very emotional.#Reno has his own version of the “I know what you are” Dog meme but its a gif.#His gamer tag is something I threw together last minute out of his last name and cold motif (please let me know if you have anything better#Iharu and Reno didn't know each other until the community started shipping their mascots together.#Now they're best friends who have started doing this whole “gay for the bit” relationship.#It doesn't help that Reno has show up in the background of Iharu's stream and has been seen spending the night at Iharu's place.#even though they live in different states and refuse to offer an explanation#Can(n)onGoddess and BlossomBear stream together a lot. It's probably the few times you'll hear Mina willingly speak.#I forgot to mention that Hoshina has a glass cabinet filled with s*x toys from his subscribers.#He keeps telling them to not do that but it still happens on occasion. Now it's just a statement piece in the background of his streams.#I just felt making this.#Btw ya b*tch is 22 today#🎉🍾🎉 Yay me.#guess this is my version of a celebration.#kaiju no. 8#kn8#kaiju no 8#kaiju number 8#kaiju 8#kaiju no.8
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Consuming your loved ones’ hyperfixations is a special kind of love language
#my partner is responsible for me reading trc and rwrb and heartstopper#and I watched the clone wars for one of my best friends#and way back in elementary school I read the inheritence cycle for another one#my friends have great taste#but also there’s just Something about consuming the media that lives rent free in your loved ones minds#something about being able to understand their world a bit better#something about loving your love’s loves
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There's no guarantee that a best friend is truly going to be a best friend *forever* even if you have known each other for the majority of your lives and think you know each other inside out. Things change and not enough people understand that.
#inspired by that post that's like 'having your best friend move closer to you is what will really fix you uwu'#no??????#like#first off why are we saying that any one single person or thing in life will be what 'fixes' us?#be fr#as much as I hate it even I know that I'm the only one who has to save myself in this life#a friend who is willing to listen and support you is genuinely wonderful and helpful to have#but that doesn't mean that they're going to be what saves you in life#and it definitely doesn't mean that they're always going to be there for you either#not even in a bad way but like. people change like I said before!!#people get busy and find relationships and new jobs and I don't expect the whole world to stop for ME#just because I am frozen in place doesn't mean my friends can't enjoy their own lives!!!#and in the case of *that one friend* I didn't know what her true colors were until recently#despite knowing her since elementary school and telling each other everything#and like... it sucks and of course I'm incredibly hurt#but I'm not going to force myself to keep being friends with someone like that#or thinking that they are my 'savior'#and that 'omg if only we lived next to each other my whole entire life would be fixed'#like do you guys hear yourselves or...#lmao#come on
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THIS IS THE BEST MESSAGE IVE EVER GOTTEN IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE
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Idk if that's just kids being kids (even though I've never seen shit like this with other people) but like. Two girls tried to kiss me in elementary school. One girl tried to in lunch once. And another girl I think successfully kissed my cheek before I pushed her. She pushed me first onto these stupid things that were connected to the window (they hurt like a bitch btw), but I pushed her harder onto a wall. (Kid me did pack a push and a punch I'll tell y'all that.)
But yeah...two girls tried kissing me. And I'm still like "How the fuck–?"
I don't have any charm whatsoever (I really don't know how I even got a girlfriend.) Especially in elementary school where my only charm was being annoying and punching friends on the shoulder and crying.
Kids will be kids, I guess...?
#sam's talky talks#Talking about punching...I punched my best friend in the face by accident#I didn't mean to punch her in her face nor did I mean to hit hard. But I did. It's one of my biggest regrets#She kinda started to just...stop being much of my friend after that year of school (we were still friends ofc but drifting a bit.)#But yeah. I punched a friend. It's that school year where I just realized that I shouldn't act like that because I was scared to hurt more#But anyways fjeben. Yeah.#I was aggressive at times (still am) in elementary
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one of my friends last year was telling me how no friendship survives the grade im in and i told him that was bullshit but no he was right i dont like most of my oldest friends anymore n have found a bunch of new ones or gotten closer w old ones
#like my three best friends from elementary school#r all annoying or bitchy now#n like i dont want to be around that#ive replaced them w an alcoholic#a girl who might khs soon#and potentially the most gay guy i have ever met#but like they’re great#am i down bad for the alcoholic? maybe#just ignore that one
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Just remembered one of my friends from elementary school's mom didn't want me around her kid cause she thought I was a queer so she moved her to a different school
#she was right#that woman was a teacher at my elementary school too#i couldnt even imagine the extra effort she had to put in jusy to get that kid to the other school and also get to her job#idek why she thought i was a queer i literally didnt do anything out of the ordinary for a 7-8 year old#the only thing i can think of was that i was kind of strange and i used to forget where i was#so id like kiss the top of the daughter's head cause i thought she was my brother#but thats not like. crazy or anything#OHHH NO I REMEMBER WHY NOW#i guess it was around the time gay marriage became legal and i found out that girls could marry other girls#and so i said that one day we should get married and be best friends forever together#that ended up working out so well didnt it/sar#i dont remember if i had a crush on her but she was like my only friend so i was a little teensy weensy bit obsessed with her
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