#one of the comfort ships of all time
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thinking about the sinnoh trio when they came out of the distortion world
they didnt come through the spear pillar
they fell out of the sky
and during those moments surrounded by a sunset
they all just held hands together. watching the sky.
announcing to each other how much they treasure each other and want to be together and how much they think their lives have changed because of the journey they had together
and even if they're doomed to live eternally
they'll all be ok
because all they need is each otehr
#THEYRE JUST SO#THE ONLY PERSON THEY CAN TRUST MORE THAN EACH OTHER IS THEMSELVES#NO MATTER WHAT SITUATION THEY KNOW THEY'LL COME OUT OK#BECAUSE THE THREE OF THEM ALL HAVE EACH OTHER#gwa fbhkafhbbd h ajsfaadnasas#even when they're not together the pining that starts from this moment#the desire to be together at all times#the bonding#the need#there's no universe where they can't be together#it doesn't register in their minds#even for lucas who's come to find his place among the other two despite feeling like he was intruding on something special initially#this is where he and the other two belong#the#jsut#wadbshafbfhbhdsfdakdsna#they make me so ill#i love scarfship so much guys#one of the comfort ships of all time#they just love and trust each other so much#pokemashe#what if it happens again in hisui. waht if. this time they just marvel in how beautiful the world looks. cinematic parallels#like#they fall after the incident that causes the three of them to resent the world#and then they fall after the incident that causes the three of them to realize they actually do love the world#the difference between now and then is that after the distortion world it happens at dusk whereas after hisui it happens at dawn#thinkingg thinking
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Okay so this is almost a direct copy-paste of my earlier reblog but only the Xin Yuan parts, because its long enough to be its own post and i want to share it! It deserves it's own post <3 typical starry stuff to write a 2k word long reblog, unfortunately.
I say almost because I went through to proof read and ended up adding more stuff.
I've been cooking on this idea for the last two days since I saw the Xin Mo!Shen Yuan post but??? I can't find anything on Xin Mo's backstory or how it came to be -- which means that's free fucking plot right there baby. That's a sandbox and im making LIFE SIZED CASTLES. I'm so excited.
The idea of Shen Yuan transmigrating centuries before the events of PIDW as Xin Mo -- but when he wakes up, he's not the sword. He wakes up in the body of a young boy named Xin Yuan. Now it makes sense for this boy to be a demon, but the drama, the intrigue, the spice of Xin Yuan being a human child.
SY wakes up as a boy below the age of ten, and the System tells him where he is, and SY is excited to meet his favorite protagonist -- only to gradually realize that he's like, a thousand years or so before the events of the novel. The rant he gives the system is legendary.
Bc what's the point of getting dropped into PIDW if he's never going to meet his favorite character??? This is a scam! BUT he settles into his new life, he's like, some orphan street rat or some other tragic airplane-esq backstory.
The system gives Shen Yuan his first mandatory quest: become a righteous cultivator. Which was like, kinda his plan/hopes anyways, except! There's like?? No official cultivator sects anywhere? The Cang Qiong Mountain Sect hasn't even been established yet, and there are pockets of cultivators running around, maybe some groups or schools popping up and then sinking back down, but nothing's really taken root!
If he asks someone how to become a cultivator, there's no straight answer. No "oh you can go to X to do that". He's pissed! How can he become a cultivator if there aren't any schools around to teach him? Deus ex machina, that's how.
Out of sheer luck, SY manages to help save a rogue cultivator, and promptly gets adopted by said rogue cultivator, who gives SY the name 'Xin Yuan'. He is ecstatic. And you know what? It's actually pretty fun!
He's getting to travel the world of PIDW in its early stages, and gets to see the building blocks for the eventual main story. He's discovering all this local flora and fauna that are foreign to his old world and unmentioned in the book, and he's learning cultivation! Granted, its unsafe, newly(ish) discovered cultivation, but it counts!
Wistfully, he thinks about perhaps he'll do something grand and get his name carved into legend. Something that would eventually help the protagonist later down the line in his quest for revenge.
The system remains silent to his thoughts.
But Xin Yuan doesn't take much stock in that daydream anyways. It's nothing more than fantasy to him; wish-fulfillment. He does discover however, that he is positively brimming with spiritual energy. Overwhelmingly so.
It's both a blessing and a curse, as it puts a strain on his meridians if he's not careful, and leaves him prone to qi deviations for the exact same reasons. He already has a heart demon or two from a few traumatic experiences in the past.
(bc hey! angst a day keeps the writer sadism at bay, and all that)
I'll say he's about... eight when he gets picked up by the rogue cultivator, who I'm calling Lin Kai bc he deserves a name. They travel around PIDW up until Xin Yuan is twelve, where he goes through a traumatic experience that results in a heart demon.
It's after that that Lin Kai decides to put a stop to his wandering, and find a place to settle down to raise Xin Yuan in. Coincidentally! They settle down in a nice mountain region that's thriving with spiritual energy. The mountains at the time were called something different, but they will be eventually known as the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect
Coincidentally, the mountain Lin Kai and Xin Yuan end up on is Qing Jing Peak. XY does not realize that the mountain he's on is Qing Jing. The System does not tell him. But he likes it there, more than he was expecting. And as much as he's traveled around, he really does enjoy being in one place.
He has a tendency to go down the mountain and help the village setting up down there, and when he's a teenager he starts venturing out more and more.
Xin Yuan forgets sometimes that he's in a novel, especially after settling down on Qing Jing peak. The system becomes remarkably quiet since there's no quests for him to do and not a ton of opportunities to get B-Points. He cultivates with Lin Kai, helps tend to the garden they're growing, goes down to the village to play with the other kids.
There's one boy he's best friends with, a boy whose not all that good with words, named Liu Zhihao. He's got potential for cultivation though, so Xin Yuan drags him up the mountain when he can so that Liu Zhihao can sit in on lessons with Lin Kai. He drags him all over the forest at the foot of the mountain to go look at bugs and animals.
(One time, when they're fourteen and Liu Zhihao has been learning cultivation for a few years now, Xin Yuan drags him out of bed late one night to go look at the stars. Xin Yuan tells Liu Zhihao about ascension -- something that still feels like a far off dream to many in this time -- that night, while they're sitting on the wet grass.)
("We should ascend together." Xin Yuan tells Liu Zhihao, jade eyes gleaming. Never let it be said that Xin Yuan doesn't love deeply, no matter what kind of love it is. He was always so lonely as Shen Yuan, Liu Zhihao is his best friend. "We'll become immortals, and then we won't ascend until the other is able to.")
(Liu Zhihao stares at him silently, his face unreadable. Then, quietly, he asks; "Promise?")
("Promise.")
When he starts adventuring outwards, further away from the mountain and the village, Liu Zhihao sticks to him like rice. Not that Xin Yuan's complaining, that's his best friend after all, and Liu Zhihao has become a formidable cultivator. He deserves to show off his skills.
He starts making something of a name for himself by the time he's, like, 18 -- although that name is in its baby steps, along with Liu Zhihao. They're slowly growing renown.
Perhaps XY uses his knowledge of PIDW and cultivation in general to help make advancements in the cultivation field. Although the system prevents him from sharing too much, it doesn't mean he can't practice it himself. Perhaps he's one of the first cultivators to develop a golden core. One of the first known immortal cultivators. One of the first to have a spirit sword.
(Although I don't know the logistics of any of this since my knowledge on xanxia/cultivation stuff in general is all still pretty new and google wasn't all that helpful lol.)
Either way, its my excuse to eventually make Xin Yuan come across as ethereal to other people. Peerless beauty SY for the win. Hs wifebeam is too strong, Xin Yuan has a line of suitors following after him and he's completely unaware of it. The rest of history is not.
Demon realm stuff has been stirring up since Xin Yuan was a kid, but at the time it was rare and in the beginning stages. Its been steadily ramping up and the system is sending him on more and more treacherous quests -- some of them mandatory, some optional. SY doesn't often take the optional ones unless it comes with a sufficient B-point reward.
for all intents and purposes though, he's a wandering rogue cultivator with Liu Zhihao, going from place to place to either help a town or village, or to discover more creatures or artifacts (although there aren't that many). Just all around living his life. He participates in a few major quest lines that are sure to get him mentioned in legend, even if it's a background character way.
(Unbeknownst to him, rather than being a side character in these legends, he's named directly. You can't become one of the first immortal cultivators and NOT get name dropped for clout.)
He has a spirit sword named Shā Mó, (杀 shā - to kill/weaken/counteract/reduce) (魔 mó - evil spirit, demon, possession). He routinely goes back to QJP to see Lin Kai, or to rest when traveling has worn down on him and he wants nothing more than to sleep somewhere he knows he'll be safe in. It becomes more frequent as Xin Yuan becomes more famous. Liu Zhihao often comes with him.
it all comes to a head though when the rifts between the demonic realm and the human realm become too great, and the balance between both realms becomes unstable. A demonic emperor's influence, wanting to merge the two realms so he could conquer both to satiate his own greed.
Typical evil king stuff. This comes to a climatic head in a great battle between every cultivator available and the demon emperor's army. Xin Yuan was one of the many who helped lead the charge.
In the end, it was Xin Yuan who ends up defeating the demonic emperor, but the rift that the emperor used to cross between worlds is destabilizing as well. Except instead of trying to close, it's getting bigger and bigger, threatening to swallow the heavens and earth and demonic realm whole.
You know how Yue Qingyuan's soul is bonded to his sword due to a qi deviation? Let's take it a step further >:)
Xin Yuan uses himself and Shā Mó to close the rift. However, it takes all of his spiritual energy to do so, as well as him filtering the demonic qi into his body to redirect it back to the demon realm.
In the end, Xin Yuan and his beloved sword Shā Mó fuse. Xin Yuan's soul becomes trapped in the sword. His physical body is unable to handle the immense amount of power it takes to close the rift, and is destroyed. He is immortalized in legend by his grieving cultivators.
(Liu Zhihao ends up ascending alone. He ascends with the hope that one day he'll see Xin Yuan again, even if it's in the face of someone else. Lin Kai does not ascend, too weighed down by the grief of losing his son.)
Xin Yuan, now Xin Mo, falls into a stasis. He's very confused and disorientated when he regains 'consciousness'. The system has been silent for most of his life, only popping up to give him mandatory quests, hints, points, or to answer any questions.
But once he wakes up, it cheerfully pops up again, congratulating him on completing the origin story of Xin Mo. SY freaks the fuck out. he'd shake the system screen if he could, but he doesn't have arms. or legs. or eyes for that matter.
He can sense his surroundings, but its all like imprints to him. He can sense the energies, but he can't see anything. It's all very disorientating and horrifying after years of being human. Like a sensory deprivation chamber.
The closing of the rift and the cycling demonic qi tainted both Sha Mo and Xin Yuan irreparably, and it did some kind of damage that resulted in SY needing to feed in order to use the spiritual powers. Kinda like how Xuan Su uses YQY's life force for it's spiritual energy, but instead of feeding on his own lifeforce, Xin Mo feeds on others.
The rest is history. Xin Mo is originally tied to the story of Xin Yuan -- believed to be all that remained of the man after he sacrificed himself to keep the realms separate. It's believed that the force of the realms closing permanently infused Sha Mo with demonic energy, turning it into Xin Mo.
But, like many stories do when faced against the tide of time, things get lost; chipped off; changed. Xin Mo is steadily separated from Xin Yuan, especially once it becomes clear how parasitic the sword really is, until they are all but separate entities themselves and the origin of Xin Mo's creation all but forgotten.
The years blur together when Xin Mo is not being wielded, and at first Xin Yuan was agonized by the fact that he stole the lives of all his wielders. He knows it's only a novel, but his decades spent in this life have softened him, and he's grown attached to the world around him.
But time erodes the mind like water erodes stone, and he becomes numb to it, then eventually anticipating of it. He forces himself to remember what he knows of PIDW's plot, and kinda fixates back on his old obsession on Luo Binghe. But while PIDW stays in his mind, his memories as Xin Yuan fall to the wayside.
Not forgotten, per se, but... tucked away. The system prevents him from forgetting fully.
Xin Mo isn't fully a demonic sword either i think, but instead harbors an ugly cocktail of both spiritual and demonic qi. Special circumstances and all that. Everyone just assumes he's a fully demonic sword because that's usually at the forefront, his spiritual qi weakened from the initial fusion and from years of not being fed spiritual qi. It's part of the reason his wielders always end up destroyed by him, other than the whole, yk, 'overwhelming qi' thing.
Nobody would recognize Xin Mo's human form as Xin Yuan other than some truly ancient demons. Of which Meng Mo might. But even that's iffy because there's a lack of surviving paintings of Xin Yuan, but also because of XM's demonic appearance and supposed lack of connection to XY.
Xin Mo has never spoken to his wielders before, not in the same way he does Luo Binghe. He tells Luo Binghe this, and he also tells Luo Binghe down the line that he is both spiritual and demonic -- something he also never told his wielders because there was no point to it.
okay okay i've got to end it here because its already gotten ridiculously long -- of which im both apologetic and unapologetic for -- but i DO think the Shang Qinghua and Shen Yuan meeting (and reveal) would be fucking hilarious. Especially if SY has learned how to pop between sword form and human form by then -- although i guess it doesnt matter either way because SQH's reaction is still the same.
And that reaction is internally screaming and going "hey what the FUCK?? WHY DOES XIN MO HAVE A HUMAN FORM??? WHAT IS THIS??? SYSTEM??? EXPLAIN???"
meanwhile from his place on the sword hilt xin mo is squinting at Shang Qinghua in bewilderment and going "aren't you supposed to be dead" but doesn't pay too much mind to it because its not like its going to change anything.
...up until he catches shang qinghua going "WTF" silently from his little corner while all eyes are off him. One moment SQH is standing beside his king, and the next he's been tackled to the ground by one wild-eyed, human-shaped Xin Mo.
everyone, including SQH, thinks Xin Mo is going to kill him. It is a surprise to everyone when he does not, and instead dissolves into deranged, uncontrollable laughter after spitting out some phrase in some ancient tongue and watching SQH's eyes grow wide in recognition.
#svsss au#svsss#scum villain au#scum villain#scum villain self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#liu zhihao is indeed based off liu qingge. i am a multishipper at heart and liushen is a delicious ship. XY and LZ i think were very devote#to each other regardless of if it was romantic or platonic. they're besties! and im a sucker for devotion in all aspects. its neat :)#XM eventually tells LBH about how he used to be human once and he tells him about his Xiao Zhi. and that he hopes Xiao Zhi was able to reac#ascension in his absence. LBH silently seethes with jealousy and abandonment issues a mile wide. he asks XM if he misses him. XM gets this#unreadable distant look on his face that makes him look far more mortal than is comfortable. then he mutters 'yes.' LBH hates it#Cang Qiong sect gets miraculously spared by Luo Binghe on account of 'my demonic sword grew up here and he'd be upset if i ruined it'#does LZH look like LQG? ...i want to say yes bc itd be crime to derive SY of LQG's beauty even if he never knows what LQG looks like#imagine XM as human coming to clash with YQY. he takes one look at YQY. then at Xuan Su. before going 'we're alike. you and i.'#rip SQH. executed for the crime of *checks scroll* making XM laugh before Binghe could. making XM laugh at all actually#XM is usually very reserved and restrained but for the first time in a thousand years he's met someone just like him. the emotional rush#is intense. SQH asks him later how long he's been Xin Mo. expecting like. at LEAST a few years now or after him but then XM blinks at him#and then mutters something about how he's lost track of time. oh hey btw what year it is??? he forgot to ask. SQH tells him and Xin Mo says#'oh! about a thousand years now' 'WHAT' and XM tells him about being Xin Yuan which SQH was not expecting. whether thats because#he genuinely wasnt expecting it or it was part of his outline or an idea he messed around with and didnt expect to make it into the world#SQH tells him about the legend of Xin Yuan. XM is stunned. he asks about Liu Zhihao. LZH made it into legend too. which XM is very#pleased by. 'good. he deserves it for all the hard work he put in.'
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Curly had two days to act and Swansea had two months.
I think it’s just interesting that every defense of Swansea not immediately acting are the same ones that are argued against for Curly. “He didn’t want to alert Daisuke or makes things worse for Anya either Jimmy!” I mean people also assume that about Curly and the crew. “He has to think about his plan of action and a right moment!” Again so did Curly, power and authority aside, he still would have to think of what he had to do. “He makes sure he doesn’t have to be around Jimmy!” So did Curly and they only do this to an extent, both give Jimmy more than a few opening to keep harassing Anya.
This isn’t defense of Curly nor a damnation of Swansea. Their actions are very parallel to each others in tragic and sour ways when it comes to how they approached helping Anya. In the grand scheme of it all they both did the same thing: Nothing. No action either took stopped the inevitable outcome of her death nor Jimmy’s continued damage to themself.
The only real difference is Swansea didn’t like Jimmy which is pretty substantial, but also just as damning as Curly knowing how bad Jimmy could get to an extent. He had even less of a reason to wait, even more of a reason to act seeing as he was now worried for Anya AND Daisuke. He is not bound by the possible procedure as Captain and actively does not care about what happens next. So what does it matter if he acted in the moment? Why did he wait? I think he’s just as morally complex and grey as Curly and we hold him on a pedestal that still perpetuates things in rape culture the game critiques.
It’s not just enough to dislike and be abrasive to predators/abusers like Jimmy. It’s not enough to just put yourself between them and the other person. It’s not enough to hold tensions when you know someone is vulnerable. He and Curly do the exact same things but on different sides of the coin. I ask how is it better to not turn a blind eye but still not really do anything about what you are seeing? Not until it affects you atleast…
The game makes a big point to not put men doing the bare minimum or who wait to do more on pedestals and I’m actually surprised so many are missing that point.
#like I’m sorry two months? he couldn’t have explained it at all to Daisuke?#he’s no better than Curly and it’s likely Anya found comfort in the fact that Jimmy would at least avoid being around Swansea#tho everything he went off to drink or passed out she would be acutely reminded that things are still taking precedent in his head#she is not his top concern nor is seeking justice for her like he is admittedly more concerned about Daisuke he doesn’t mention her#outside of the fact that they were def talking about what Jimmy did and likely the fact he might’ve crashed the ship but pls don’t mistake#his final acts as being majority for Anya. the game keeps showing how these men keep prioritizing things over her even when they say they#won’t and it’s sad it’s so sad that we keep trying to say but what about him like they all do it#it’s not intentional but that’s what’s also bad about it like I doubt she made a suicide plan with him two months in advance#these characters are acting to get out of this and she knows her ending is not happy if she leaves or not she’s taking that choice to do it#and hell Swansea might not have known by the way he speaks to Daisuke and Jimmy that that was her plan to khs#likely either to just keep her and Curly locked in med bay until they got rescued or died#but it’s all speculation and thinking and I can only implore people to think why are you giving Swansea more credit?#cause I see him bittersweetly so used to the negatives he cares not for futile efforts#two months vs two days and each time nothing was really done for her other than prolonging her suffering around Jimmy#Swansea slept outside utility was drunk most of the time and it’s clear Jimmy was able to have access to Anya whenever#I mean look at the teaser where they sit at the table he is far from her with Daisuke#like it’s just frustration at this point thinking any guy on that ship was doing good by Anya specifically and not for their own reasons#like at least Curly was direct on the issue he still did mostly Jack shit but Swansea doesn’t even let Jimmy know he knows#and that’s another issue in rape culture of men avoiding calling other men what they are even if they hate them like#the game plays with the idea of knowing vs acknowledging and neither truly acknowledge it as a part of their actions#against Jimmy and god no one did better than Anya for Anya. they just weren’t heinous like Jimmy#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#swansea mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#nurse anya#it’s not all men but all men can and do play a part especially in the extreme scenario mouthwashing deposits
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So much love and recognition to the people who don't know how they feel about recovering. To the people whose scars are fading away, and there's a sinking feeling, despite knowing that it's a good thing. To the people who miss when they were "worse," when they felt "broken." To the people who mourn losing their coping mechanisms, even the ones that were destructive, scary, or unpleasant. To those who feel guilty they're healing because their past self wasn't ready.
Whatever it is, there is nothing wrong with any of those feelings. It's a natural reaction, something you don't have ultimate control over. There is nothing shameful about yourself, and I admire the strength it takes to recognize how you feel, even the parts that do feel like the "wrong" reaction to a Good Thing.
#mental health#self harm tw#self harm mention tw#sh tw#mental health recovery#mental health support#i love you i love you i love you#i admire you and empathize with you and want to be your fellow man. i want to share this wold *with* you#and that includes sharing a world that you aren't sure you deserve or are ready for#the world can wait. humans have been here for hundreds of thousands of years. it can wait#when i think about all this what makes me feel better is remembering how many billions of people have lived#and it makes me feel better to know that there has never been a problem too big to have - to uniquely awful#i have my own conflicted feelings about this because objectively i am healing#but it feels like i have boarded on land after surviving the worst trip to sea ever...#...a trip that was plagued with my ship being flung through hurricanes and lightnight and i'm only manning a sailboat...#...and i have found land and that land is good...#...but my legs feel like they will give out underneath me because this is solid land that i have never stood on...#...and you get used to the constant seasickness and sealegs and wondering *how* you'll make it out - If you will...#...the peace feels like a ruse at times because all you've known was chaos. but it's a good ruse and a comfortable one#and so you learn i guess to sink into the comfort like a spft feather pillow
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JADESOL MOIRAILS!
#jadesol#jade harley#sollux captor#homestuck#hs#i fucking love this pairing no one understands#my rarepair my beloveds#theyre playing stardew valley in the first doodle#sollux is setting up the sprinklers and automating the farms#jade is petting their dog before heading to the mines#second doodle theyre playing outer wilds#thinking about how outer wilds is the Definitive Space and Doom Aspect Video Game of All Time#thinking about how both of them would get something different out of the game#thinking about how sollux actually cries at the ending and jade comforts him#chris doodles#ask me more about them im insane for it#this is all apart of my very elaborate#davekatsoljadearafef multiship#which is the Ship of All Time
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this is for my selfshippers with insomnia; and/or a hyperactive mind, intrusive thoughts, all the other bad things too that can keep a person from resting...
you f/o holds you during the long, horrible, sleepless nights. when you feel so alone, kept awake by all the noise in your brain, they're there for you, all night long.
they're there to remind you to take your medication for it, if you have it. they help you form a healthy routine with it, they want to see you feeling better. they might even train you to have a positive association- maybe you get a kiss every time you remember?
and when you do get to sleep, and when you dream of your f/o, it'll be all the more sweet.
#inspired by how i started taking meds for my o/c/d which ended up helping me sleep better! much less intrusive thoughts and bad obsessions!#only good ones 😉 hehe#and my guy (in plushie form) sits next to where i keep them in bed and he does help me remember them!#i sleep every night now! i'm just waiting on having dreams about him... come on subconscious you can do it... 🤞#it's a great time to be in love. feels like my brain had all this awful clutter and now there's more room for my special little freak!!! 💚#I DON'T KNOW IF THIS IS HIGHLY SPECIFIC I THINK IT MIGHT BE... :0#f/o positivity#self shipping#f/o comfort#self ship comfort
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First of many
So much had happened. Nasiens had found her biological family, she found out about herself, she almost died... but now her hero was with her again.
When the battle was decided, a few words were exchanged and someone gave Percival a cloak so he could cover up. He hadn't even realized he was naked. He apologized, though it was clear he didn't see the issue.
After a while, her new family (she had to present them to Ordo as soon as she could!) left her alone with him, sharing knowing smiles.
Nasiens couldn't stop looking at him.
Percival... She smiled.
"So you are a fairy now? That's so cool!" Percival's voice was so soothing to her. How had she missed his smile!
"Yes... I'm not used to flying, though..."
"But now we can fly together!" Percy said, laughing. He grabbed her hands and gently lifted them up. Nasiens was shocked but soon started smiling again. A little spin in the air, and she was laughing along with him.
"I just can't get used to the height..." she admitted looking down, feeling cold sweat in her forehead. It had been fine in the battle, but now... She looked up at Percival, thinking how silly she was being. Something gleamed in his eyes.
He threw her one of his winning smiles and she felt her heart stop.
"Well, that's easy! Just keep looking at me!" His face was too close to hers, but then again, he had never been good at respecting people's personal space.
And Nasiens couldn't think of anything better to look at than his eyes. He always managed to calm her down. She could do anything as long as he's with her.
"See? You can fly really high if you want!" Like a spell being broken, she looked down. She almost let out a scream. They were so high up she could barely see the ground!
Her arms moved on their own, hugging Percival. She hid her face in the crook of his neck, trembling.
Percival was shocked. Not because of the hug, he loved Nasiens' hugs, as different as this one felt. However, she felt like dead weight. Had she stopped flying?! Of course she wasn't in any real danger as long as he was there to hold her, but...!
"Nasiens?!" He could hear her mumbling nonono again and again, "I'm sorry! I thought...! Are you ok?" He was so worried about her and Nasiens was still trembling, but she managed to answer,
"Ye-yeah..." she looked up. She was again at a loss for words. She knew Percival was still Percival inside, but he was really big now, and tall, and... she could feel her face aflame. "Yeah, I'm... I'm good. I was shocked, I guess..." she couldn't look him in the eyes anymore.
Percy was silent for while before he spoke again.
"You really feel different now, uh..." Nasiens eyes widened at his comment.
"Wh-what do you mean? Is it bad?" Percival's silence made her a little nervous. He wasn't looking at her anymore. She forgot to ask again though, since they landed in the hollow part of a cave, up in a mountain, and the sight amazed her.
"It's beautiful..." she said. Percy agreed, but he wasn't looking outside. His eyes were fixed on the pretty girl he was holding by the waist.
Screw pretty, he thought. Nasiens had always been beautiful, but now... It was like a whole other level. The way she held herself felt different. Also,
"You got boobs now!" he shouted, almost giving her a heart attack. She almost tripped, blushing like crazy.
"Ye... yeah..." she put her hand on her chest. They weren't even that noticeably, but... "the whole thing feels weird..."
"Bad weird?" he sounded genuinely curious.
"N... no, I don't think so. I never felt bad being called a boy, but now... I like this. Being a girl, I mean. It feels right, but I'm... not used to it yet. Not completely, at least. Is that weird?"
"I don't think so! Anyway, Nasiens is Nasiens, no matter what! You are amazing!" when he looked at her, he could see that gentle smile of hers that he loved so much.
Nasiens was so grateful. Of course Percival wasn't fazed. He was just Percival. He hadn't even questioned her change, something which she she was grateful for. She couldn't even imagine how she could start explain the whole thing to him.
She was thinking how much she loved this side of his and was so deep in her thoughts, she didn't realize when Percival got behind her.
"You gotten slimmer too, right? Right?" his poking sent shivers down her spine. What was his obsession with her back?!
Nasiens felt her face aflame again.
"Please, don't do that!" she almost screamed, taking a step back.
"Why? Can't I touch you?" he sounded so innocent, she almost felt bad. But when she looked up again she saw how serious he was. She felt taken back. He had never looked at her like that before, not like this.
How could she tell him that the only thing she wanted was for him to touch her all over... it was just so embarrassing to admit!
She felt her true feelings coming forward before she could stop herself.
"Well, if you a-!" a flashback made her stop. A painful memory crossed her mind and she felt silent.
Anghalhad.
She felt her blood boil.
"...you know what. I think it's best that you don't." She turned, not before giving him the iciest look he had ever seen. That kind of look was never directed at him! Percy got worried.
"N-Nasiens?! Are you angry at me? I hate it when I make you angry!" he ran to her. He grabbed her hand so she couldn't get further away from him. She flinched and stopped, but she didn't look at him. "I'm sorry, did I say something bad?"
"You got Anghalhad to touch, don't you?" she said, immediately regretting her words. It wasn't Percival fault, or Anghalhad's for that matter. Plus, she knew Percival didn't understand these kind of things! She barely could, after all.
"Yeah, I guess..." Percival's voice made her angrier and she felt so ashamed. She took her hand back, snapping at Percy.
"See?! Go to her for all I care!" she looked down, hiding her eyes as best as she could. She couldn't face him like this...
"Wha...?! No! I don't want to! I want to stay here with you! Nasiens!" he grabbed her by the shoulder, shaking her a little. He had to make her understand...!
Were those tears?
"Nasiens...? What's wrong?" she lifted her arm, trying to wipe her tears with her sleeve.
"I... I'm a horrible friend! I don't hate Anghalhad, I actually like her... but thinking about you two...!" she put her hands on her face, trying to control herself. "Who am I to say anything? You are free to do whatever you want...! But I hate it! I hate the thought of you two-!"
Percy hugged her so tightly she almost couldn't breathe. She felt his hand grabbing her hair, same way he had done early that day.
"P... Percival?"
"I won't touch anyone else!" he exclaimed, shocking her. "I don't really get it, but I thought of some else touching you and that made me angry, so I guess it's the same for you? Is that it?"
"Ye... yeah."
"Is it because you love me?" Nasiens felt trapped. She was about to protest when...
"Cause I love you too!" he said, his smile so bright it blinded her. He caught her so out of guard she almost fainted.
"Well," he continued, "I love all my friends... but with you... love falls short. Does that make sense? I want to hold you forever..." Percy said, snuggling to her. Looking down he saw her eyes, so full of hope and love, he couldn't help but smile. Nasiens smiled back.
"Y-yes, it makes sense. I... I feel the same way." Nasiens couldn't believe it. She confessed! She managed to do it and now...
"Good!" he grabbed her waist again, lifting her from the ground, "then it's settled!"
Nasiens felt tears forming again, this time from happiness. Things could be so easy with him sometimes... but then she remembered their little argument. She blushed again.
"A-about before... I don't mind, you know... but, you have to ask."
Percy was confused for a moment. Then it hit him.
"Really?!" he had pulled her down a little. His face was so close to hers...!
"Ye-yeah."
"Can I, then?" he asked. His lips were so close to hers, she felt her heart about to explode.
"Yes..." she tried to close the distance and...
"NASSIE! Percy! Dinner time! Come on, where-! Oh, there you are!" Tioreh shouted, appearing out of nowhere.
"...what are you two doing?" she asked, innocently.
It was a rare sight, if you asked her. Nassie with her face all red, pushing Percy away. Her hand was on Percy's face and he looked miserable, ignoring Tioreh and trying to get close to Nassie.
"But you said I could...!" he whined.
"QUIET, PLEASE!"
Tioreh had never seen Nassie so embarrassed. It was fun!
Later that night...
Nasiens couldn't believe it. They had almost...!
But the moment had been ruined.
She put her hands on her face, sighing. Maybe some other time... She was fixated in the fire next to the log she was sitting on, deep in thought.
"Nasiens! I was looking for you! Look!" Percival's voice took her out of her trance. She looked up to see him better, confused in what was she supposed to be looking at.
He placed a white flower on her hair.
"I knew it! It suits you!" he said, making her blush yet again. She gently touched the white flower with her fingers. "You look beautiful, you know!" Nasiens felt her blush deepen. She was going to get a fever from blushing so much...
"Thank you, Percival..." she smiled at him and he smiled back, love in his eyes. He sat down next to her and she rested her head on his shoulder, sighing.
"Man, that sucked, uh?" he suddenly said, looking down at her. "I really wanted to kiss you."
Nasiens was definitely getting a fever.
"Re-really? Honestly, I did too..."
Without much thought, Percy turned and grabbed her by the waist, surprising her. He flew them away from the dinner and the rest.
In the air, with the moon shining brightly, he looked at Nasiens. He smiled, closing the distance between them.
"Can I?" he whispered.
Nasiens laughed. He really took it to heart to ask first.
"Of course...!"
Their laughter filled the night. At least for tonight, everything was going to all right.
#persiens#percival#nasiens#4kota fanfic#4kota#im getting ahead before 153 breaks my heart lmfaooo#did i read all 4kota chapters in under three days cause i fell in love with a ship?#yes. yes i did.#btw im a firm believer in the blanchefleur theory and that anne is a red herring#i love anne so no hate to her but yeah#also im using she/her pronouns for nasiens cause i believe nasiens is a girl now#tho only time will tell! maybe nasiens will prefer he/him or they/them#who knows!#im changing them depending of what nasiens chooses#my writing#first fic tho lol#also pls don't come at me#i know you dont need anything to be one gender or the other#this was just for this fic and my headcanon that nasiens feels more comfortable being seen and living as a girl#which again this headcanon can be shattered into pieces in a few days lmfao
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I’m gonna be honest with y’all. I try my best but I do not understand half of Star Wars. I’m Din Djarin in this fandom. I don’t understand the storyline, I have no idea what anyone is talking about, I don’t want to be in charge, I got a cool outfit and I have a car let’s ride.
#Star Wars#Everyone else: long winded wonderful analysis on everything in Star Wars#They understand how the force works#they get all the references#they knew Spice was drugs bc they understand context clue#Me: I got one million clones and hurt/comfort in my pocket who wants some?!?#I don’t know how the force works and at this point I’m too afraid to ask#I thought Spice was a fancy salt#I don’t know what any ships are called#read my fics and see how many times I use Bantha#it’s bc i know no other SW animals#I love SW I know nothing about it#I try so hard I’m so confused all of the time#anyway this was a fun little post of me making fun of myself hope yo enjoyed
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can’t help falling for you
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#nicolas d wolfwood#my spin on how they started to really fall for each other tbh..... i mean#my hc is that vash fell first --> hence ch 21 -- which is kind of funny bc they had a lot of back and forths and conflict between one anothe#but i Cannot be convinced otherwise that when vash woke up and saw wolfwood bedridden next to him#that expression alone was filled with so much worry and care and i think that feeling of gratitude and knowing wolfwood had survived pushed#the level of affection.... also those few chapters where theyre just hanging out in the ship honestly feels so domestic amongst everything#which is the kind of atmosphere where i think vash thrives upon the most and is able to feel#comfortable and open to relieve any inner buried feelings...#for wolfwood id like to think he always felt a little drawn to vash due to not only his mission but also bc vash Forces him to be worried#all the time so-- he's just always on the mind and coupled with their initial opposing ideologies#i think ultimately in ch 35 is when he stopped having any feelings of doubt in vash and caved to realizing that he /wants/ to protect him#and also just loves him. a lot!#anyway this is so gushy but i love them so much#these thoughts plague me#ruporas art
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oughhhh... what if... kinger and queenie were married before they arrived in the circus and once their memories started degrading, each other was all they had left of their life before the circus... or what if they were dating before and they got married in the circus... them being able to hold on even though everything felt pointless because of each other... also i know caine would have had a field day with a wedding in the circus. WHAT IF... queenie was the one who told kinger that things wouldn't be pointless as long as they had each other, and as long as he had people who cared about him.. and he passed that message along to pomni .. something something people living on in the little kindnesses that impact others, living on in memories and in legacy....
#i feel like early in his days in the circus kinger may have been a little like pomni-- scared and upset and jittery#maybe a little more scatterbrained than her#and maybe. maybe. queenie was his version of ragatha- personally i think the two of them arrived at the same time#but she was the one checking in on him and trying to stay positive even though it was difficult for her to stay optimistic at the time#not necessarily a buttonblossom post (although i do think it's a cute ship)#i feel like queenie could have been like a. rock. or a sort of anchor-like figure? not necessarily a leader but a source of support#if kinger was (not as much as he is now with his memory problems but at least somewhat) the scatterbrained one#then she could be the levelheaded one? balance each other out? i think he could have looked up to her too#but she would still be a fun person. i think one way she coped and helped kinger cope was with distractions (ex. bug collection)#so if she was smart creative fun and a source of support then it would hurt all the more when she started abstracting#and her memories started to go away and SHE became the scatterbrained one#and then kinger tried to emulate her when comforting her and others#the amazing digital circus#tadc#tadc kinger#tadc queenie#tadc checkmates#epilogue speaks
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constantly thinking about vex and percy giving each other a life neither of them could've dreamed of or ever thought they deserved or might realistically have. how they saved each other from themselves and their respective self-hating tendencies. how they can only trust each other with certain things because they know the other can handle it. how they're the perfect team. how they communicate so effectively and clearly. absolutely no one is doing it like them
#I am skjdfkdjskf about them all the time#I will never ever stop loving them#critical role#cr1#perc'ahlia#percy x vex#vex x percy#vex'ahlia#percival de rolo#percy de rolo#vex'ahlia de rolo#also like. don't get me wrong I love a tragic messy toxic ship just as much as one like this#but perc'ahlia is just as interesting as a fucked up ship because THEY are fucked up individuals#and they SUPPORT each other through figuring out how to be less fucked up#not even in a 'I can fix him/her' way but in a like. she needs some extra love right now way#or he needs some extra comfort right now. she needs some extra space right now#and they just give it to each other willingly#it's so sweet
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need u to share your kandrew agenda 🫶 tell me all about them
ALL about them? dangerous territory my friend...but i will try my best
kandrew are my favorite pair of worsties like i'm not even kidding i love writing them as friends to lovers because they could be having r-rated pg 18++ thoughts about each other at any given moment but they will die before they confess. im talking off the charts sexual tension okay the air is fucking charged. i do have a few fics on them but they're building up to kandreil...sadly no solos yet...
my brain says (🤓☝️) they have an understanding that goes deeper than a lot of the other relationships kevin has. i think one of andrew's best qualities is to listen to someone talk about the worst thing that has happened to them and not overreacting or coddling them afterwards (which is something im personally fond of and love to see) so he may as well have been a tether for kevin when he left the nest. (not to mention how similar jean and andrew are and going from one 3 to another would fit kevin well) to me, if someone sees them together at times they'll feel like andrew and kevin DETEST each other. they're ultimate bickering couple, constantly roasting each other, arguing as a build up to sex, they drink like their life depends on it, they hate each other, they're in love and i am watching all this with popcorn. they get each other tbh like they get it. they may not fully understand but they do get it.
also something about a dog collar but that thoughts not fully developed yet.
have some memes that might help:
#wymack hates them#loathes them really#if u wanna know smthn specific then u can ask ofc!!! i know most of this was pretty vague#aftg#kevin day#andrew minyard#kandrew#there's a lot more to say tbh#like i actually love fwb kandrew because of how hesitant they both seem to admit their feelings#but we all know that doesn't work#just feel like they'd be physically and humorously and emotionally present and comfortable around each other a lot of the time#but both of them have easy triggers and bad tempers which is a recipe for disaster and angst and i love that hehe#eeeeeeee they're actually really funny to me i love writing them have fun and then makeout#wheres that one post about how everyone should actually imagine kevin day bent over a desk with andrew doing unspeakable things to him#hmmm#i think kandrew is the most physically affectionate kevin ship i like
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thinking about floyd and riddle spending their first halloween as a couple together... i think floyd absolutely loves how varied and lively all of the different halloween traditions he's learned about since coming to live on land are, and he wants to try out as many of them as he can each year. so when riddle tells him that his mother always made him stay in his room studying on halloween, and that the only halloween activities he's ever done were those that NRC students were required to participate in, floyd decides that the two of them are just going to have to spend the day doing everything they possibly can. riddle tries to say he's far too busy for such things, but floyd will not let it go and honestly riddle is only half-heartedly protesting anyway because he secretly did always dream of doing the things that other kids got to do on halloween, and maybe it wouldn't be such a big deal to take one day off and spend time with his boyfriend.
so, riddle never got to make jack-o-lanterns? floyd decides to "borrow" about half a dozen of the pumpkins jade and azul had bought for mostro lounge and takes them to riddle's dorm room. riddle is terrible at trying to carve them at first and floyd can't help but laugh at him a little, but since he knows it's not riddle's fault he's never gotten to do this before, he says he'll show him how to do it. unfortunately floyd isn't nearly as good as he thinks he is on account of having lived in the ocean for almost his whole life and now riddle gets to laugh right back at him. they probably both get the hang of it right as they're down to their last two pumpkins.
riddle never got to go trick-or-treating with his childhood friends? floyd texts trey and convinces him to get in touch with chenya as well so that they can all go together. when they approach the first house, in the costumes they had prepared for each of their school's halloween events, riddle starts to get nervous and asks if they aren't all a little too old to be doing this. floyd shoves several huge handfuls of candy from that person's bowl into his and riddle's pumpkin-shaped buckets and tells him it's not like there's any rule that says they can't, and besides, riddle is such a cute little goldfish that he practically looks like a kid in his costume anyway! chenya stifles a laugh while trey has to stop riddle from committing murder that night.
riddle's never gone to a haunted house before? floyd and chenya both think it would be hilarious to make him go to one, so they do. riddle absolutely hates it, but it honestly does make him happy to see everyone else enjoying it--even if floyd and chenya both keep trying to egg him and trey on and get them to go down creepy corridors and check around corners by themselves, and even if floyd keeps running off to different parts of the haunted house and then coming back and hugging or even lifting riddle from behind knowing full well that he'll get freaked out by it.
riddle never got to play the apple bobbing game that's traditional in the queendom of roses? turns out there's a place right by the haunted house where they can go to do it! predictably, floyd is great at it while riddle ends up drenched without getting any apples, but just giving it a try is more fun than riddle expected.
riddle's never gotten to make candy apples before? luckily, trey knows an amazing recipe as well as what combinations of toppings work the best, and he's willing to teach them both! riddle gets very confused at imprecise directions such as being told to use "a few" drops of food coloring on the syrup or to drizzle "a little" white chocolate over it, and keeps asking trey exactly how much he should use. floyd thinks this is adorable. he also thinks it's adorable when riddle tries to scold him for ignoring half of trey's directions and just doing whatever he thinks sounds good.
riddle's never done a horror movie marathon before, or even seen any halloween movies in general? floyd insists that they marathon at least 3 movies together. after the experiences he had at the haunted house, riddle doesn't think he'll enjoy horror movies, but he tries to keep his cool throughout the first one anyway... which does not work out, because he really can't handle jumpscares or excessive gore. during the first movie they watch, floyd (who loves slasher films so much that he laughs and cheers every time the monster gets a kill) is happy to let his goldfishie cuddle up to him and grip onto his arm to keep himself from knocking the popcorn bowl onto the floor, but you know that once it's over riddle is getting teased relentlessly about how scared he was. floyd decides to be nice and put on something tamer for their next two movies, and riddle actually ends up really enjoying coraline and especially beetlejuice.
by the end of the night riddle realizes that they've stayed up way too late at night and a small part of him wants to scold floyd for keeping him up so late, insisting on having him do all of these silly activities and eat all of these terribly unhealthy snacks. another part of him wishes he could scold his mother for keeping him from doing any of these things as a kid, with his friends and the other kids in his hometown, the way you're supposed to do it... and another part of him still is just incredibly happy and grateful to floyd for finally giving him the chance.
#twisted wonderland#twst#riddle rosehearts#floyd leech#florid#floyddle#floyrid#floydriddle#floyd x riddle#riddle x floyd#man i wish the twst fandom agreed on ship names and tags lol. i think that's all the ones i've seen.#also YES i AM still posting halloween headcanon posts after halloween#sorry if this post is dumb and ooc. i may have a canon url but i do not claim to be a riddle expert much less a floyd expert#BUT i really do think riddle would enjoy animated halloween movies and more lighthearted horror comedies like beetlejuice#especially since beetlejuice has Rules. the ghosts have rules for the afterlife and even beetlejuice himself Has to follow rules.#so it's comforting and easy for riddle to understand#and i think floyd enjoys slashers and thrillers and such MORE than those types of movies but he will make compromises for his bf#because as much as he loves teasing him he doesn't want riddle to be like Actually Upset or to have a bad time#plus maybe i'm just a baby but i think coraline is genuinely pretty creepy even as an adult lmao#okay anyway. if it wasn't already obvious i love them <3
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my friendship with canon ended now fanon is my new best friend
but first a cute bird
basically my mind decided that it's now free to draw whatever AUs and stuff that I want including random stuff like this
and this!
I think my way of coping with 423 is just... ignoring it ever existed so now it's just this and an occasional canon stuff
but good for him he deserves to have all the fun fanon can offer
fun fact: this was the first sketch out of all of them in this post!
#fanart#sketch#my art#bnha#shigaraki tomura#tenko shimura#league of villains#it's basically all of them but not really since Tomura just got their outfits#toga himiko#bnha manga spoilers#bnha spoilers#it was a funny thing to go from crying from 423 to laughing from a streamer Tomura ideas#I never allowed myself to really enjoy them#but canon proved itself to be useless for the time being and I don't believe that Tomura will come back#some believe that Tenko will and we'll see but it's a break week next time#so for now I'm just coping the way I want#also I'm interested in drawing some ships that have been fun for the last 5 years#mostly Tomura related but at least 2 not related to him#I'm not exactly a person you'll go to to ship stuff but like... I have some ships I enjoy to read#(and even write if you remember the natshig week stuff!)#basically now bnha is in my “undertale” zone of drawing actually#like I can draw whatever I want if I'm inspired and canon now matters only sometimes otherwise it's fun#I already said what I think about the situation itself so I just want to enjoy drawing Tomura for a while#i want to hug him#also this one Spinner outfit was drawn because I hated how Stain-like the other one was it was disturbingly funny#so I spared him and gave the one that looks comfortable and warm instead but manga panels were now a thing for those sketches
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Curious.. cause I’m kinda in multiple fandoms all at once right now
What are you guys following me for? Also what would you like to see more of on this blog?
(Note: I am asking cause I want to see the demographic of who’s actively following me, I won’t do everything that is asked of me in the comments)
#genuinely curious cause this blog is so out of focus#if you’re one of those people that are like “’waaa waaa all you do is draw bireena and none of the other mk characters’#or just something to that effect#don’t even ask me anything#THEY ARE MY COMFORT SHIP LEAVE ME BEEEEEE#I don’t mind branching out but if your way of asking me to draw more is passive aggressive#then I won’t do it#end of story#I’ve been actively posting my art since I was 13 years old I’ve been talked to like that PLENTY of times#😭 but anyway#feel free to let me know what you’d like to see more of#just without the y’know passive shit#yea that’s about it
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Found this soft interaction in the Master Blackmailer episode - Holmes touches Watson's shoulder so tenderly! and its very brief part in frame, but you can see how Holmes' hand lingers on touching his shoulder even as he moves away <3
(spoilers in thoughts under readmore)
Watching this there are some wonderful moments of justified anger in it, I can see how much this case and the injustice wounds Holmes, and in turn stresses Watson (who's concern in Sherlock is also very justified, that even he himself says he went about the case in ways he's not proud of, in the end... poor Aggie made me laugh initially, but then feel burning second-hand shame at how Holmes used her during this case.) Robert Hardy is an amazing villain in this!!!! I got goosebumps from the way Milverton looked at people during this whole episode, like a predator sizing up its prey. Chilling
#granada holmes#granada johnlock#granada sherlock holmes#acd holmes#the master blackmailer#victorian husbands#holmes x watson#edward hardwicke#jeremy brett#giving watson reassurance; cold inhuman heart my ass!#its so evident how much he cares about the people involved in the blackmail; and Jeremy Brett puts his all into conveying it in this#they give each other comfort many times during this one and its making my shipping heart go crazy! they are an old married couple
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