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#one of my worst posts tbh
fleshengine · 1 month
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White Man SHOCKS pacific northwest by triggering perfect 10.0 magnitude earthquake along the cascadia fault line.
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distorted-graffiti · 10 months
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they could be the worlds worst polycule
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fumifooms · 3 months
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What if we were both magic prodigies and it otherized us in different ways and we devoted ourselves to protecting a family member who has general other goals & priorities. What if we both did self-sacrifical devotion in opposite ways.
What if we were dark mirrors of each other and where I've grown overcontrolling you've grown complacent. What if, bought as a servant into a pretty loving home, ownership and control is what love looks like to me, and to you neglected and lonely growing up, love is gratefully taking any scraps of it you’re lent.
By belonging to someone, even if she comes back injured or fails at finding Delgal, she feels like she belongs and is cherished, by owning someone he feels safe in them not leaving him.
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She’s what’s tethering him do you see… And he’s the only thing giving her direction and purpose in her state. She needs a compass and he needs a support.
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They’re both so out of it 😭 It’s the weirdly intense and unearned mutual trust and reliance on each other?? They’re each other’s weird little comfort codependent teddy bear. Or at least they were headed towards that before SHE DIED THEN HE DIED THEN THEY BOTH FORGOT ABOUT EACH OTHER AND NEVER MET EVER AGAIN. Though she’s also the guard attack hound keeping him safe… And vice versa he heals her and can rewrite her very being with just one wave of his hand. They’re both so so mentally and physically vulnerable both but they cling onto each other. They can’t perceive things accurately but despite it all someway somehow they stumble into something closer to resembling companionship just before they both die. Falin is just that kind and Thistle is just that lonely. Overworked. We both haven’t lived for ourselves in a very long time, haven’t we.
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They both have a similar devotion to the people they love but again the difference is that Thistle starts overtsepping while Falin is self-effacing. The other difference between them is that people care about Falin <3 People have given up on Thistle long ago, and he has given people reasons to, while people refuse to give up on Falin. Yaad has a mini arc about it dw about it it’s ok he’s not all alone in the end 😭😭 He reached out for Marcille’s hand but they already all wanted to help him, they just had to be given the chance to, Yaad just had to be given the chance to, it’s okay I’m okay
Hey what if we learned to get in touch with our own identity and the world around us and living in the present again through being in the worst codependent situationship ever.
Falin and Thistle sitting in a tree, sucking on flowers together because they’re h-u-n-g-r-y 💕💕💕
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I bet he’s only ever thought of flowers as useless ornaments. Weak weeds. But she shows him they’re tasty and useful and good and pretty in their own right too and deserve existing without proving their worth and waaa <33 Thistles…... Did you know thistles taste sweet if you remove the thorns and eat them?
"Even as a chimera, her kind nature remains" you can’t suppress her in the way that matters. You can’t soothe him in the way that matters. It’s doomed. You’re doomed. It’s all doomed. Save me.
#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Thistle#falin touden#thistlin#OOOOH UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP THAT SOMEHOW WORKS OUT SAVE ME#I need them to be traumabonded kittens to not separate post-canon#I’m seeing a raise in post-canon thistle content/interest which makes me v happy#Fumi rambles#Falin learning to disobey orders with Thistle is one of my fave things. EAT THAT CURRY GIRL!!!! Nvm that it’s gonna get you killed#It’s good for the character arc#Falin and thistle sitting on a web o-b-s-e-s-s-i-n-g <3#This is somewhat of a tldr of my huge thistlin post. Plus some thoughts i had in discord or twitter#Keeping it for another day but tbh if you see their dynamic in canon as her thinking/having picked him as her mate it changes nothing#about her behavior which I find funny. Thistle accidentally claimed himself a parrot mate bc he’s bad with monsters confirmed#Ik my thing of them learning to relax and live in the present moment again is pretty fanon BUT IT’S WHAT KUI POINTED TOWARDS#With her calming him down from a panic attack and eating berries. With the baths for dandruffs. Etc. Thistle hasn’t socialized in a long#time and he wouldn’t if it wasn’t a tool he needed to interact with BUT it’s still socialization and it’s getting him in touch with his#surroundings again even if just a bit slowly but surely!! The Toudens have a superpower in reaching Thistle. Bless#How’s that one post go again. he refuses to develop he's part of the problem he maintains the cycle he's trapped in the cycle.#she's growing she's finding her place she escaped her original role she wants to help people she will never save him she will never save hi#Something something they have to abstract each other bc relationships with humans have always been too charged and unsafe#Only by seeing each other as more concept than person more object than peer can they truly be vulnerable#Like the fuckedupness lf their dynamic and state is WHY they’re so attached. Why their dynamic could be so raw and needy#The stars aligned in the worst way. Mission successfully faile#Tfw we both need to feel needed
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hbpseverus · 1 month
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okay, one thing about james. he is the only marauder (casting peter aside) who i just can't forgive. i like remus, and while i dislike sirius i can at least appreciate his strenghts and his good sides. but i can't forgive james for the swm incident and many people seem to have trouble understanding why this isolated event ruins his entire character. because i am willing to believe that he worked on himself and became a better person after hogwarts (mainly because i don't think lily would have ever married him otherwise). i completely believe that even at hogwarts, he was considered a likable person by many. that he was fun to be around and friendly to most. that he wasn't all bad or only a bully.
but here's the thing. there are things you only have to do once to be irredeemable, and what happened in snapes worst memory, to me, is one of those things. i do not care if james was an amazing person outside of this one incident. and i understand that everyone has different morals and that other people can forgive james - or not forgive severus. unlike james, severus got a chance to redeem himself and he took it. he was still a bully, but here's where my personal perception comes into play again. i had many awful teachers who were bullies and i know how much it sucks (in my country, teachers are insanely hard to get fired, meaning they truly can get away with almost anything including obvious discrimination). i can't justify his mistreatment of students, but to me his good sides outweigh it, so i can forgive and like him despite this flaw while others can not which is valid too. but sexual harassment is not something i can forgive no matter the circumstances or the person who did it. i would feel the same way if the roles had been reversed and james had been the victim - i wouldn't be a snape stan. ultimately we all have our own individual morals that play into how we perceive these complex characters.
tldr: it doesn't matter to me if james was a balanced character and a good person outside of swm because committing sexual harassment 'just once' is still one time too many and makes anyone permanently irredeemable in my eyes
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pralinesims · 10 months
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My 23 faves of 2023 in no particular order A.K.A. MY FAVORITE (MOSTLY) AARON EDITS IN DIFFERENT FLAVORS
Tagged by @madeofcc and @agena87, thank you so much! I'm tagging @eljeebee @adelarsims @itsmariejanel @pxltown @mattodore @madebycoffee @non-sims @castawavy @potential-fate @squea @sikoi @gleamer and everyone else who is in mood to do this, please feel free to say I have tagged you ♡
Under the cut follows some unnecessary personal commentary about the edits in case you're interested.
Really like this bc of the pose, also the drawn on freckles make him look extra cute.
Feel like he looks really mean there.
Him sulking in a hotel and almost setting it ablaze is everything to me.
He literally looks insane. Absolutely love it.
The cowboy look suits him so good? The toothpick in his mouth is like a cherry on top of icecream.
Obviously intoxicated Aaron is a look which is near impossible to me to explain how much I adore it? Love how fucked up he looks there.
This was sooo fun to do, I love when I'm able to show off his influencer lifestyle and make it seem a bit lively.
The wolfcut, the long lashes, the slutty top?? OOF
I'M JUST NOW REALIZING HOW GOOD HE LOOKS IN PINK
The sequin jumpsuit?? Do I need to say more
It's really visible there how heavily tattooed he is.
Love how sickly he looks on this pic.
My favourite little hoe. Always extra obsessed with him whenever he wears a beret.
THAT'S MY WIFE RIGHT THERE, seriouslyyy love her pretty face so much.
THIS IS MY OTHER WIFE. My problematic obsessive witch.
Love love love how the vampire look barely alters from his regular one.
Such a whore 😪
Vale in his full goth get-up... oh my god...
Best friends posing for instagram selfies, what's not to love.
I ADORE THE LAUNDROMAT AESTHETIC ANYWAYS, but with these 2 buddies especially, they look sooo freaking cute there imo?
Them posing with matching halloween costumes and sipping blood, ahem, juice...
MY SLAVCORE EDIT. Honestly love that I managed to pull that specific vibe off so well.
Ignore these idiots, whatever they're doing is absolutely legal.
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theminecraftbee · 9 months
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an explosive repetition
this is a gift for @caracuuw for @mcytblrholidayexchange! please enjoy some time travel fwhimmy! this is crossposted to the ao3 collection here. i had fun writing it; happy holidays, and enjoy!
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The embers of the campfire burn low during the yearly meeting of Emperors. People cheer to the newest of their number; the Codfather had been late, but he’d arrived, panting and covered in leaves and apologizing. They’d talked in quiet tones about things only people who were the emperors of their own nations could discuss, about the year to come, about the power afforded to them, and, while not about politics—the campfire meeting had never truly been for politics—they discussed what to expect from each other on an interpersonal level. Something changes in a person, when the life of a nation is tied to them. That’s what being an emperor means, even if these days only about half of them go by ‘emperor’ and only just about as many inherited their positions; even now, Fwhip remembers the day he was given the leadership title over his sister, and the way the sudden weight of the entire nation settled over his shoulders, and he knew what being an emperor was. 
He feels a bit like that now, actually, except also significantly more on fire.
Not literally. He is no longer literally on fire. But, like, it’s sort of hard to forget the feeling of being on fire, even briefly. It lingers under his skin. That hadn’t happened when he’d gone from Fwhip to Count Fwhip. If that had involved being set on fire he probably would have tried harder to refuse at the time instead of being all like ‘oh hey I am no longer the unwanted second son but a vital part of this nation’, because being on fire sucks, and he doesn’t recommend it to anyone.
Pretending he is not on fire also sucks. If it weren’t for the fact he looked across the campfire, saw Jimmy appear, and saw him shaking in a very particular way too, he probably wouldn’t have been able to hide how on-fire he was. He certainly wouldn’t have been able to navigate the conversations that are normally held at a campfire meeting. He’s pretty sure he barely navigated them as it was. He had been too busy giving Jimmy baffled looks at every free moment, trying to figure out why he was technically no longer literally on fire, and freaking out about how these were all the conversations he’d had last year, actually, and he sort of remembered them, and hey maybe he only has to pay half attention anyway because if they’re the same conversations as last year, there won’t be anything important for him to know, because he already knows it, and oh man what had he gotten himself into now, and—
The point is that during their secretive magic meeting and all that, Fwhip had mostly been on fire. Is he thinking straight? He’s not thinking straight.
He waits until basically everyone has left (Pixlriffs hasn’t yet, but the Copper King has a tendency to stick around at these things and Fwhip doesn’t think he’ll get rid of him) before rounding on Jimmy.
“You,” he says.
“Me? What do you mean me? This is your fault!” Jimmy says back.
“If you hadn’t had your stupid idea of making peace or whatever…”
“Oh, well excuse me, but it was your machine that blew up. I’m still on fire!” Jimmy pauses. “Metaphorically! I’m metaphorically on fire!”
“I mean, it’s not a metaphor when it feels a lot like actual fire, that’s not what a metaphor is I think?” Fwhip says.
“Are you sure?” Jimmy asks.
“I mean, I think so?” Fwhip says.
They both pause for a moment to contemplate this. Jimmy shrugs. “That’s not important!” he decides at last. “The point is. You set us on fire! You blew us up! You blew us up so hard we time traveled!”
“And would that have happened if I’d just been using salmon power? No! No, it has to be your stupid cod that did it!” Fwhip says.
“Well I think it was your stupid face!” Jimmy says. Fwhip gasps.
“You take that back,” he says.
“Make me!” Fwhip says.
“Um,” Pixlriffs says, staring wide-eyed at the two of them. “You know, I’m just going to leave now. And leave you to… your time travel? No wonder I’ve had a headache for the past week.”
Fwhip and Jimmy stare at him.
“I’m very good at pretending I don’t know the future, don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone,” Pixlriffs says, and before Fwhip can interrogate him on that, he darts into the woods. It’s a little awkward, with none of the mysterious grace a statement like that should have, and all the gangly arms and legs the Copper King has had for ages. For a man with so much mystery around him, he’s always been a little too silly, a little too awkward, and a little too approachable. Fwhip’s always wondered if it’s a trap. Fwhip wonders if he’s actually going to not tell anyone. Fwhip… 
Fwhip turns back to Jimmy and discovers Jimmy staring after the Copper King, a wistful, fond, and exhausted expression on his face. It’s so out of place with the yelling, and the time travel, and with Fwhip’s knowledge that Jimmy’s the pettiest emperor on the entire continent. It makes Fwhip’s stomach hurt.
It’s quiet.
“Sorry,” Jimmy says. “Sorry. I haven’t seen him in a long time. He was never really the same after—I haven’t seen him in a while. I should go have tea with him. There’s a fancy word for that where he’s from but I never remember it. He’s always been nice about that.”
“Oh,” Fwhip says.
“He looks less tired,” Jimmy says.
“Yeah, well you look kind of like shit,” Fwhip says.
Jimmy smiles, low and sad. “Yeah, well, you look even more—more bad. When did you last sleep?”
Fwhip doesn’t answer.
Jimmy shakes his head. “Anyway, enough of that. I’m supposed to be yelling at you about the time travel. Did you really blow us up so badly we went back in time?”
“Do you have a better answer?”
“I mean, I don’t know! I don’t want to be dead! I’m already on fire.”
Fwhip thinks of rumors about the Copper King and omens. He swallows. “Yeah, you know what, I’ll buy it’s time travel. Time travel! Back to the beginning of all of this! Just when things were finally starting to really work out for everyone!”
“Yeah,” Jimmy says. “Just when.”
They both sit down in front of the embers of the fire, almost at the same moment. It’s surprisingly cold now that the fire has mostly died. It shouldn’t be cold at the same time as being on fire, but maybe it’s the absence of any new fire to warm them with. Maybe it’s the fact that he’d been sitting, trying to have a conversation, getting used to the fire. He wouldn’t know. It seems distinctly like the kind of thing that Gem would know, except Gem has only just ascended to officially being Head Wizard, and she hadn’t had a war with a demon yet to really dig into the archives. She might not know. She might not tell him. He understands if she doesn’t. She’d always been the more responsible sibling in most ways that matter, and…
“Fuck,” Fwhip says. “Fuck, I blew us up and we’re back in time.”
“Stop swearing,” Jimmy says. “Besides, it was my fault, wasn’t it? Council told me not to do it and everything. I’m a failure like that.”
“Only one of us has got failure in the name, buddy.”
“Hah. Yeah, true, your parents suck.”
“It’s supposed to be for good luck. Shows what the Grimlands know.”
He shudders. He’s still on fire. He doesn’t know how to stop being on fire. He thinks maybe it’s all in his head, except for the fact Jimmy’s on fire too. It just—it had happened so fast. One moment, he and Jimmy had been shaking hands, and announcing they were burying the hatchet, and unveiling the salmon-cod reactor. It had been a good moment. Sure, there had been no way he and Jimmy would have stopped disagreeing, but they were committing to no more wars. To attempting to talk. To attempting peace. Fwhip hadn’t really wanted to hurt Jimmy for months anyway, and they’d both known it. Too many other things had happened, and even if the salmon and cod had stood between them before, the salmon-cod reactor would prove that with their powers together, they could be something more.
He’d turned to shake Jimmy’s hand one more time, the papers sign.
Then, the world had exploded.
It had hurt. He’s still on fire now, but it doesn’t hurt like that momentary flash of light, the twinned look of horror in Jimmy’s eyes, the realization something had gone horribly wrong, and then the world exploding around him. Someone had screamed; Fwhip still isn’t certain if that had been him. Fwhip had reached, a moment late, for the emergency stop. He’s not sure why, in hindsight. Some ingrained instinct to try to hit that button whenever something went wrong, maybe.
He’d been on fire. The world had been on fire. The earth had shaken. Jimmy had said something.
Then, the world exploded again, proving that instinct to hit the emergency stop a moment too late had been right after all, and Fwhip had woken up just outside of the campfire meeting. He went through it on autopilot.
“So, uh,” Jimmy starts. “We time traveled, huh?”
“We sure did,” agrees Fwhip.
“What do we do now? Because like, if we change stuff, do we vanish and die? I don’t want to vanish and die because I changed the time stream, man,” Jimmy says, wringing his hands nervously. His gills flare in and out on his neck.
“Pixlriffs literally already knows we time traveled.”
“And that was your fault, wasn’t it?”
“Mine? How was it my fault? You were arguing with me!”
“No, you were arguing with me!”
“Well, he’s your friend, so it’s your fault. I barely know the guy in this time.” Fwhip pauses. “I mean, I knew him later, when we were all sort of on the same side. He’s fun! Had some great ideas about how to handle corruption, liked explosions well enough, the whole works. But right now, he’s your friend, not mine.”
Jimmy pauses and frowns. “Oh, right. Hey, wait, that doesn’t make it my fault!”
“I think it does.”
“Look, I don’t know what to do with time travel either. Maybe Pixlriffs won’t say anything? I mean, he’ll tease us about it, but he doesn’t normally say anything about his whole… you know, right? It’s fine. It’s fine!”
“Yeah, maybe. Maybe that won’t change much,” Fwhip concedes.
Finally, the burning is starting to fade as the sun sets. Fwhip realizes he doesn’t know what that means. Maybe, he thinks grimly, he’d been burning because he’d set the Grimlands ablaze, too, but there isn’t enough Grimlands left to burn. Maybe it’s just time, though. Maybe it’s nothing quite so terrible. Besides, it’s good, the not being on fire. Very good, that. He doesn’t want to be on fire. Being on fire is… bad.
Lots of things are bad, actually. Maybe he doesn’t feel like he’s burning because he’s no longer at risk of erasing himself from existence? Or, worse—because he already is being erased from existence.
“Gods, Jimmy, I might actually kill you for this one,” Fwhip says. “I’m at least going to do something you hate.”
“So, good news, you’re supposed to steal my music disc about now,” Jimmy says. 
“…really?”
“Did—did you not even remember that’s why this started?” Jimmy asks incredulously.
“I don’t know man, I don’t care about a stupid shitty music disc right now!”
“I can’t believe you. I can’t believe I was making peace with you. I can’t believe I was going to kiss you and everything. The nerve!”
“Listen, I thought it was a religious conflict! The cod and salmon thing! You know, inherent irreconcilable differences and all that!” Fwhip says defensively. He pauses. He goes back. “What was that last bit?”
“What, your nerve?”
“No, the part about—you were going to kiss me?”
Jimmy goes very, very still. “Ignore that,” Jimmy says. “Ignore it. Ignore it! It doesn’t matter right now. Besides, we’re enemies again now, right?”
“Right,” Fwhip says, feeling strangely disappointed. “I mean, I would have kissed you back. Even when we were enemies.”
“…really?” Jimmy says.
“I mean, yeah, I like people who might stab me,” Fwhip says.
“I don’t know how to take that,” Jimmy says. 
“Yeah, it’s a problem.”
“I can imagine.”
It’s awkward now. Now that Fwhip isn’t on fire, it’s—it’s awkward between them. Fwhip doesn’t know where he stands. He should probably mock Jimmy about having a crush, but it’s a little late to do that, on account of having admitted to having a crush himself. It feels like the kind of thing they should ignore at the moment, really, given that…
“Anyway, I guess I’m stealing a music disk and maybe your codfather hat?” Fwhip says.
“I’m going to have to act like killing the dragon is a good idea,” Jimmy says, vaguely sick-sounding.
“Relax, it’ll be fun for me to get to yell at you.”
“Sure.”
They stare at each other for a while. The thing is, really, that Fwhip doesn’t want to die.
“I mean, it can’t be that much harder to do the same way a second time, right?” Jimmy says, trying to hype himself up. “I’ve already done it once! It’s like, I already know how to do all of this for sure! Yeah! It can’t—it can’t be that bad. Can I kiss you though? Since you know anyway. It won’t be changing anything, promise, I’ve just—since I was going to do it. To seal the alliance. Our secret alliance. Can we at least have one of those? So when—when it’s all my fault that a demon’s here and all—”
“That really wasn’t your fault,” Fwhip says. 
“Please?” Jimmy says.
Fwhip considers it. Fwhip shrugs. “Yeah. Secret alliance, until we get the real one in the end. Secret alliance to preserve the future.”
Jimmy sniffles. “Yeah, that.”
They both awkwardly lean in. Fwhip has never kissed Jimmy before; he’d always imagined it would taste kind of slimy. It doesn’t, although it does taste a little like fish, which makes Fwhip sort of want to laugh hysterically. Instead, he just pulls in deeper. Suddenly, they’re both kissing with the desperation of the two only people in the whole world; they might as well be. They’re the only ones who know. They’re the only ones who are here. They’re the only ones who are about to have to do—to do everything. A second time. Then, they’re kissing with tongue, and Fwhip nearly pushes Jimmy to the ground trying to press his entire body into Jimmy’s. One of them might be crying; it might even be Fwhip. He’s on fire again, he thinks. He’s not sure what to do. It’s all gone. It’s all gone. They’re starting over, hurtling towards a happy ending interrupted by the worst mistake imaginable, teetering on an edge with only each other, and they’d only just learned to stand next to each other without threats like a week ago. Fwhip doesn’t know what to do. Fwhip doesn’t know what to do. So he just keeps going, the two of them practically clawing at each other trying to dig into the skin of someone who at least is trapped with them, and—
Jimmy, suddenly, as though spooked, pushes Fwhip away. They stand there panting for a moment. Fwhip tries to bring his head back down to reality.
“Why do you have gunpowder on your mouth?” Jimmy asks, almost like he’s saying something else.
Fwhip really does get hysterical, then. “Oh, wow, okay, secret alliance. Okay, we’re doing this. Okay. Okay! You taste like fish.”
“I am a fish.”
“Not anymore!” Fwhip says, and he cackles. “You aren’t—you aren’t anymore, remember? You and Lizzie were all—cursed? Anti-cursed? Shit, do you even know you're siblings yet?”
“Oh, seas,” Jimmy says.
“Yeah. Yeah!” 
“I don’t—Fwhip, I don’t know if I can do this,” Jimmy says.
“Tough shit,” Fwhip says. “Because I can’t do it either.”
They stand there staring at each other for a while.
“But what happens if we screw it up?” Jimmy asks. “What happens if—even if changing it’s okay, until we blew ourselves up, it was—”
“It was good,” whispers Fwhip. “It was good. We were happy. It was okay. It was good.”
“What happens if we never get that back?”
Neither Fwhip nor Jimmy can answer it. They just keep standing there by the campfire, waiting for an answer that won’t come. Instead, the minutes keep slipping away, and the weight of everything that’s just been undone gets heavier, and heavier, and heavier, until Fwhip would prefer the fire.
“Okay,” Jimmy says. “Okay. I have—I still have a nation to run.”
“Yeah, so do—so do I. Here. A personal—this is a personal number. Only Gem has it. If you call using it—”
“Okay. Yeah. Secret alliance,” agrees Jimmy. “We kissed on it and everything, that makes it unbreakable, I think. I don’t know. I haven’t kissed many people. Does this make us—the only real couple I know is Joel and Lizzie, really, and I’m not sure we should model this off of Joel, as much as I love him.”
“Jimmy, if we make it to the end of this without going insane, I will propose to you, and we’ll have a wedding to make it official. We can upstage Joel and Lizzie and everything. I don’t care what’s actually a good idea,” Fwhip says.
“You wouldn’t,” Jimmy says.
“You’re one to talk,” Fwhip says.
“Thank you,” Jimmy says, and it’s the single most desperate thing Fwhip has ever heard the other emperor say. He never wants to hear it again.
“It’s—we’re in it together, man. I’m not that selfish,” Fwhip says. 
Jimmy rubs his eyes. “Good to know we’re both learning that about ourselves.”
“Can we stay here a little longer?” Fwhip says. “Just until the embers run out.”
“Yeah,” Jimmy says.
They do. They sit next to each other. At some point, Fwhip grabs Jimmy’s hand. He stares as the fire burns down. Neither of them say much else. He doesn’t know if that’s for the better or not. Maybe they should talk more. Maybe they should try to work out what they should do, or what a secret alliance even looks like. Maybe they should argue again, because that’s fun, but—
Fwhip doesn’t know. This works, at least.
They can figure it out tomorrow. Yeah. That seems like a decision that won’t have consequences at all.
“Hey, Jimmy—” he says, and then stops. “Never mind.”
“You’re weird,” Jimmy says. “I can’t believe I time traveled with you.”
“Ditto, man.”
They can figure it out tomorrow.
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ganondoodle · 1 year
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i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo
#ganondoodles talks#also probably sounds like self pity#but this feeling hits everytime i see a super popular artist be the popular cool artist#i am a little weird i know that and thats not somethign bad i think#but the internet never gets to see that much of me#i tend to write posts when i am at my worst bc it has to go somewhere#so the image it tells people is that im a weirdly strong opiniod freak that gets breakdowns over nothing#i also dont feel like im otherwise -cool tm- enough to balance that out#i dont think my art is as stylized or as inventive as others nor am i cool to interact with bc idk how to be cool to interact with#i feel double bad when i misstepped with someone i used to talk to bc of something stupid ... or just dont know what i did wrong#im guessing its especially when i am in that spiraling state of mind where i really am not myself tbh#it still feels very bad bc i feel like i can never make it up to anyone again#sorry i acted like a jerk my brain was exploding in emotions in a desperate attempt to deal with something idk how to deal with-#-and made me not act like myself but now i feel really dumb about it#doesnt sound like a good excuse#... i want to thank those that do stick with me#even if i acted strange sometimes- even if i disappointed sometimes- even when i couldnt keep a promise#there are little things that still make me angry at myself#like that one time i asked in the tags whod read as long as the end of them and if someone did shoudl send me an ask so id draw a lil thing#and i got two#and i kept trying to remeber oh shit i need to do that and forgetting again/not having energy for it in a loop#i still feel like a jerk about it but now its probably too late#i wish i could answer all asks i get but man my energy for that is always rock bottom#no matter how much i enjoy the ask#and i love getting asks!!!#im sorry :((
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chemicalbrew · 2 years
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Xenogears | Introduction
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theceaselessidiot · 3 months
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sorry i am not done being upset about how cressida was treated in part 2.
i especially want to talk about how the conversation between eloise and penelope had about cressida genuinely made by blood boil.
when eloise said "i genuinely enjoyed her at the start", she made their entire friendship sound so trivial, like cressida was just some toy meant for her entertainment...and then she basically said the friendship was motivated by pettiness (which fine is justified giving her anger at penelope being LW).
also saying she hopes cressida has a "reasonable" moment like have we even seen cressida be unreasonable? imo most of her actions have perfectly reasonable explanations.
it just leaves a bitter taste in my mouth to see cressida doubting her actions, regretting them even and questioning whether it was a good idea (it wasn't) meanwhile eloise is out there calling her a viper, a monster (and that is before cressida and her mother publish their sheet about the bridgertons) and basically saying "well she was fun at first but then I got bored"
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mothbeasts · 12 days
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i miss posting and making and engaging with ieytd content but I will be honest sometimes it feels alienating. as a lesbian.
#bee's buzzing#ieytd#i dont know.. its probably just me being Strange. but.#the Main guy in the fandom is juniper. and he's interesting! but. i don't... think about him as often#and when i do it's never in the shipping / x reader context i see so frequently in the tags.#i dont ship him with agent phoenix because. my agent is an it/its dyke. so i dont really engage in that side of fandom#i also dont think about the handler as often because. idk i just think about the women more!#but juniper and agent phoenix and the handler are like. the only people i see talked about often#which is fine!! people like them. i also like them just. not in the same way/to the same extent.#im here for the women. but. they're not talked about often at all :[#when they are it's usually briefly in passing.#they get the worst of the mischaracterization too imo. because people just do not give them the same depth as they like to give-#- charas like john. it makes me kinda sad tbh.#and also the fandom does not. seem to make much space for f/f content.#i know like. the handful of other people who make f/f content for ieytd.#and. god. idk im still honestly a bit ticked off by one solaris post that 1) was not a good analysis i will be quite honest.#it was very surface level. like really basic info and also iirc not entirely accurate? i cannot remember anymore#but. 2). it started by saying 'nobody talks about solaris outside of fabbylaris' and that still makes my blood boil.#like. not to vaguepost but. the fabbylaris posters ARE talking about solaris outside of a shipping context. please. please#also there was a whole Thing a while back where people started being strange about non-feminine nonbinary agent phoenix.#and as a nonbinary butch-adjacent dyke. it made my skin crawl!!! im NOT feminine and idk why making agent phoenix not feminine is.#apparently Bad to a certain subset of the fandom#sorry but im a dyke and i WILL make the player insert protag a butch lesbian who doesnt use she/her.#and if you have a problem with that please think about Why people making the player insert nonbinary and androgynous/Vaguely Masc is-#- such a problem to you. and whether that is alienating to the trans people in the fandom.#okay. im normal now. goodnight.
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atopvisenyashill · 5 days
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do love how this is an asoiaf blog but i did not put either show in my top 10 this is the world we live in
#the only season that really compares to the book is season 1.#the rest even when they’re engaging have changed something that feels so central to the hook that i’m mad aksjd.#getting on my soap box#if iwtv s3 is good it may knock someone out. probably qaf.#bsg is p high up there i just think season 4 really suffered on pacing & the suspicious nature of who dies annoyed me.#veep is also very high up there tbh i need to rewatch it. the thing is. as we know. i am a romantic at heart and amy & jonah have my favorit#sitcom relationship. veep has genuinely one of the best finales to ever exist but i’m a sap.#and amy coming back to tell jonah that he made her realize she doesn’t actually have to expect the worst from life. oh my god.#also superstore >>> parks & rec >>> the office bc superstore never romanticized the hell of their job#amy quitting her corporate job when she realized she would never be able to make the changes she wanted within the system she was always#going to compromise too much and wind up like jeff. glenn reopening his dad’s hardware shop & specifically who goes w him & who stays w gina#at the store? it has what the other two lack which is characters that feel like they keep existing after you stop watching#BECAUSE the way they interacted with the world was so real and so much more realistic. amy can’t fix the system but she can find a job that#she doesn’t feel is so soul sucking. glenn may be choosing a harder path by reopening the hardware store but it’s the one that makes him#most fulfilled. gina just gets to make money and be bossy w people who do what they’re told. that rings so true to me.#i almost out bojack horseman in here too actually but once again i think the last season just needed to be a tad longer just like bsg.#also same issue w pitch as w bly manor - it’s an amazingly written season of tv but it’s ONE season of tv#big brother as always outsells yes i am hoping to tempt some of u into watching by posting dan & ian in the dog costume#i have that gif and the ‘sit’ scene saved on my phone always
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daz4i · 2 months
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i feel like. a lot of people talking about horror miss the true horror factor in many stories and esp in body horror. the horrifying part is what's happening to the characters, yes, but when you sit down and think about it... the implications, if that's the right word, are scarier
take smth like a werewolf transformation. it has to be painful, even if you get used to it eventually, the unnatural changes to your body have got to hurt, and you don't recognize yourself by the end of it
the horror isn't the mere transformation, but the physical pain, and the psychological aspect
now take stories like i have no mouth and i must scream, or long dream, or the jaunt. yes, they all have their own horrifying aspects, but also elements that others might not consider horrifying - in particular, a long life, or even immortality. some people truly strive for that. yet, here they are presented as horrifying. and i think that's for the same reason
i think. the true horror in most horror media. isn't the monster itself or the killer or the machine etc. it's consciousness
think about it. why does a slow death sound horrifying? it's your awareness of the pain you're going through, as well as the knowledge that you're about to cease to exist. the actual death is normally considered a mercy in these situations, because your suffering stops. your suffering stops once your consciousness stops.
and! this idea is true about both in-universe and on a meta level. a lot of horror relies on keeping things juuuust out of sight to get your mind going and scare itself better than any sfx or verbal descriptions ever could. your own brain working against you, the same way it works against the characters in the story.
the common thread between any horror that i, at least, find scary, is the human brain itself
and it's scarier, bc this is real. this is smth you experience every day. you wake up and think thoughts and are generally aware of what's going on for most of the day, for better or worse. this same level of awareness can be applied to the most horrific situations, and so, bam you've got yourself quality horror. and you're always just one accident or one mistake away from it, too. you just try not to think about it, because, well, your own brain is scarier than any monster it can conjure.
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ourhouseishaunted · 1 year
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my brain for the past like 2 weeks
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azumasoroshi · 1 year
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the shizu-chan song
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just discovered the shizu-chan song by none other than johnny yong bosch. help me
id transcribe if i didnt have a final in 10 hours. maybe when i get back
oh nvm someone already wrote them out
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this has similar energy as the bro duet song but like. in reverse bgskjdghjkgsd the no homo is for real
plus an animatic version and amv version because holy hell this is old
#i hear there's another shizuo song by johnny yong bosch according to the comments from 2017 but ill have to wait until yt recommends me it#anyway this makes me want to make a bro duet animatic for shizaya#which would be hilarious because. they're not bros#the ship dynamic of 'two guy best friends who maybe kiss sometimes' is very good but very not shizaya#so the spontaneous love confessions just come out of fucking nowhere during one of their fights#it would be really funny. trust#and probably better than the angst and self-denial festival i would make animating the actual shizu-chan song#i can already see the half-smiling-to-himself half-looks-like-he's-about-to-cry pining semi-regretful izaya face at the last shizu-chan#also. izaya guitar player headcanon hello#if someone can make an artist hobbyist izaya au i can make a guitar hobbyist izaya au#tbh izaya's more spontaneous and i feel like he wouldnt like all the hard work and practice time that goes into learning an instrument#like his main hobbies like parkour and switchblade throwing are stuff he gets to put into practice all the time and are more 'useful'#but instrument practice it's just him and his thoughts and callused hands for hours at a time#feel like he'd get frustrated pretty easily in that way#anyway wouldnt it be hot if izaya played the guitar LMFAOO fuck my characterization and let that man play fingerstyle#izaya playing piano is a somewhat popular headcanon anyway#god i have the worst habit of putting the entirety of my post into the tags. must be the incorrect lov joke bits spilling over#shizaya#shizuo heiwajima#izaya orihara#durarara#Youtube
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rainofthetwilight · 11 months
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while I work on some thingies, here have lloyd in his leaked s2 gi
im not proud of this that much but I haven't posted actual art in a while so have this green boy
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shdwtouch · 5 months
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not me openly admitting that shade lowkey takes after me. this was not intentional, I swear. uwu; she kinda just... ended up with an extra dose of who I am as a person, whereas most of my original characters receive much less.
I realized this when considering that shade is most likely homo leaning. and I was like, haha she's just like me ! an enby ace lesbian... and then the similarities just kept getting drawn. idk maybe I'm just overly tired.
also like. not gonna apologize ? she really isn't a self-insert. but its also like... creators are allowed to put themselves into what they make ! and I'm proud of shade, I really am. so I won't be made ashamed for traits we might share.
#《 ° puffin.exe 》 im a puffin ! i dont do much#° mobile post !#° to be deleted !#tbh i dont know hoe people get off accusing people of making self inserts in the rpc like#how do you know ?? unless i explicitly state or draw comparisons ??#and why would i do that if my intent is to fool people ? like.#i understand that interacting with inserts can be uncomfortable. i do !#but unless you really know the person ? you arent in a place to say their characters are inserts#and tbh i feel like most of my discomfort comes from the prospect of being deceived#im okay with writing with inserts but im gonna draw boundaries#especially if youre writing them with the intent to live through them / fantasize.#while I think its valid its not something i am personally comfortable with. i dont consent to that as an rp partner.#but im also envisioning the worst possibility in which its someone getting off to how i interact with their oc#point being. to my mind. self inserts arent bad. they also arent easy to judge.#and even if i dont consent to interacting with an insert for the purpose of being wank material or emotional stimulus...#people could still use my content for wank or emotional stimulus by putting themselves in the shoes of whoever im writing with so#am i really one to judge? no. because again. i dont know.#and i honestly think anyone who can come out and say their oc is an insert or takes after them is#more trustworthy than someone who doesnt disclose it. idk just. there is no need for deception.#and if you do try to deceive me im gonna assume you have ill intent#whereas honesty is something that should be valued. especially in cases where the truth is so stigmatized.
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