#one example I'm thinking of right now
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I'm so grateful that my autism has sort of mellowed out as I aged, and that I'm less sensitive sensory-wise. because it's just so... I don't know, embarrassing? to think back on every meltdown.
it's embarrassing because everything hurt so badly, but it's not something I could talk about because it was all just mountains out of molehills. it's like having a breakdown and screaming over a paper cut, it's hard to even talk about without it sounding incredibly silly or making myself sound oversensitive and pathetic.
#personal#actually autistic#one example I'm thinking of right now#is I recall one morning when we were getting ready for school#and my mom was doing hair spray for herself#and she asked if I wanted some#but I never even heard her and she thought she heard me say yes#and I'm normally fine with hairspray#but it was such an unexpected sensation#and it was so painful honestly#like not physically painful but just incredibly distressing#like in that moment nothing else mattered because this was my entire world and that world was pure panic#and I remember spending the next twenty minutes aggressively brushing out my hair#even when my scalp started to hurt I kept frantically trying to get it back to a Normal Texture#and it's such an embarrassing memory because it was literally just a tiny bit of hairspray#and I was CRYING and frantic about it#and my mom couldn't really understand why I was upset. she thought I wanted it anyways#and that's just one scenario of many like it#something tiny would always hurt me so bad. and obviously nobody understood because it was tiny and stupid#it's just my silly cringe childhood where I was a pathetic aggressive crybaby about nothing#and to me it was all incredibly painful and nobody truly understood
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Look all I'm saying is if that a shadow game can work THAT well and be so well designed story wise and gameplay wise
HE can work
#sonic#silver the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#silver right now is such a open canvas of a character#story wise and gameplay wise#he's been a side character for so long and in the one time he was a main character his whole story was basically axed from canon#he's definitely been explored since then but not to extent we've probably wanted with this character-#and I'm talking mostly game silver cause obviously in IDW and archie he got some LOVE there#even if we never saw idw silver actually explore his good future#which i still think is a shame but also apparently if sega doesn't want that to be explored in a comic and saved for the games then#THEY BETTER EXPLORE IT SOON#and honestly gameplay wise he needs another shot as well#like C'MON his psychic's just needed better...well...PSYCHIC'S TO WORK#can you imagine what cool and fun movement he'd have now that sega is now slowy understanding what kinda stuff they wanna do with#the sonic franchise again and how it should play#i don't know if i should fully expect a silver game at any point#but he should ATLEAST be a second main character in a new game so people can be reintroduced to him and they can cook with him#IM TIRED OF SEEING MY SON GETTING HATED ON OR CALLED LAME#I WANT PEOPLE TO BE REMINDED OR SHOWN HOW COOL AND FUN HE CAN BE WHEN GIVEN THE SPOTLIGHT#archie and idw are the best examples of him as a character#he is a lovable friend and ally#but serious when he can be character#and his powers are literally so COOL AND INHERENTLY UNIQUE AND POWERFUL COMPARED TO OTHER'S IN THE CAST#like when surge saw silver come in casually carrying a large object and she got nervous THAT'S WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT#THIS MAN CAN BE A THREAT.#okay rant over DHDNDNDB
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Bones someone did a "Worst Parents" poll over on Twitter and it's going about as well as you'd expect.
"God people will do anything to hate on mentally ill male characters" and it's the guy who hits and yells at his son.
"Crowfeather's only crime was being a bit mean" hitting and humiliating your son= bit mean.
Yes these are things I've actually read
I'm not saying Curlfeather (who was pitted against him in the poll) is better or worse than Crowfeather, but I've seen a lot of people downplaying his abuse towards Breezepaw and acting like people are crazy for thinking Curlfeather was better
It's really wild to see it in action, isn't it? When a dad manipulates (Po3 book 2) and smacks his son (Po3 book 3) for absolutely no benefit besides his own ego, it's "mental illness" and ergo not a big deal. As if they think mental illness is a get-out-of-jail free card for child abuse.
The "Crowfeather Mental Illness" Crowd couldn't HANDLE the kind of mentally ill characters that I stan. They are weak and will not survive the winter.
When they say "stop being mean to boys with a disorder" they mean "stop holding an abusive father accountable for teaching his son slurs so he could get back at the ex-girlfriend who dumped him." When I say "stop being mean to boys with a disorder" I mean that I want to give Breezepelt a gun so he can enforce it himself. We are not the same.
#bone babble#Curlfeather's an interesting conversation for 'bad parents' though and imo one of the best examples to discuss#Because she's so much more nuanced than the common mode of WC child abuse#She never physically hurt her child nor did she emotionally belittle her#But she did manipulate her. She did put her into a position of power. And I'm not a hypocrite like certain Hawkfrost stans--#--I think that is very damaging and Frostpaw's feelings are valid and understandable#Curlfeather died one of the most graphic and horrible deaths in the entire series for her child. But... that doesn't fix what she did.#I wish that the books were able to capture the complicated feeling that Frostpaw could be feeling about her mother right now though.#Crowfeather though he was a piece of shit#no ifs ands or buts#he was just Bad and the conversation is HOW bad#fennelposting
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This is a Zim who's universe-hopped (perhaps a zim that made it out of the ZimVoid?) and ends up finding an earth that is zim-less so he sticks around. Dib isn't around anymore in his home universe so it caught him by surprise
Dib is still on his zim-is-sus kick... but he's noticing some differences. Which honestly just makes him more suspicious of him lmao
#invader zim#iz zim#iz dib#zadr#my art#as far as dib knows zim disappeared one day#and now he's back with a legit good human disguise#he's like WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING NOW#if it feels like I have a new au every few days it's bc I listen to music on the bus a lot and it gives me lots of ideas#and I'm trying to sketch every day so it's fun to get those images and thoughts out of my head =D#normally I give zim freckles but I don't think I did that in my past few arts#idk sometimes the brush I switch to doesn't give the right effect for it#this one is very thick for example so it takes a lot of space on the face#I could do the cartoony three or four dots... but I like the more subtle widespread look so 🤷♀️
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unusual face post where i don't bring up caname marriage. all of their gangstalia childhood photos have been shown! i've been very captivated by their answers
the question is virtually the same for each of them with different wordings. here lord and owner have a goal for their future. between a distinguished admirable grown up and a welcoming hotel runner. meanwhile hero and parrain's answer are like. so vague. [(i?) can be anything] and [(be?) me] makes me laugh. what are these kids even saying? such blatant different personality dynamics. i actually don't have any coherent words i just point at a difference and go wowwww coool(keys jingling in front of me). but really. how sweet!!! the different similar answers
#kill ame#gangstalia#i've heard lots of interpretation on ame's answer being#kind of petulant. i don't know if thats the right word but. mostly because he interrupted the interviewer asking#and because of the “what do you want me to say?” right before it#dismissive towards adults#and maybe to the thought of adulthood here? he can be anything he wants~#some interps see it as him being annoyed. a little fed up. sure i'll play by you... grown-up's demands...#i'm open to whatever goes honestly... hero is kind of an enigma right now. i love him dearly#refusal to give a “proper” answer to an interview could probably be seen as rude.(i don't think interviewers would mind much tho)#so hero and parrain here is a point of interest for me#and on another point!!! frus has captivated me before and now especially so with them both having to do with immortality interacting with#-humans who they care for who died#i don't angst over davie too much because it feels more like just one example. but that's frus's commonalityyyy (^_^)#and today it pops up again! their answers feel almost romantic to me. maybe less so for hero because(like i said before)...#but it's like a musing thought. i can be anything. i'd be me. what funny kids#the face family dynamic isn't a thing here but it's funny to think about with this. unexpected on who feels similar to who
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I was thinking to myself recently how wild it would be if this fandom was big enough to do a kinktober. Alas...
#me rambling#or like at least one of those week things for a ship or a specific show#maybe that's more attainable#also i say any of this as if i am a known smut writer when i definitely am not 😂#i would like to be i'm just not confident#but there could be gen options too#it's just funny to me because the source material here is so out there it kinda lends itself to kinks right?#i mean there is canonical mpreg in tyo#eddie is sticking a whole sofa up richie's arse in one of the bottom lives#alan b'stard is a canonical sadist in bed#and out of it too#there's other examples i can't think of now#i also just constantly think about fandom events i'm afraid#idk why my brain is like this i just constantly wanna set up creative events but unfortunately for the nichest things 😂#the rik and ade fest is great but only runs once a year#sometimes we do scumbag secret sanata#but those things both depend on collaboration to a certain extent in that one person is creating for another#which is great!#but what i'm proposing here is free reign to just take a vague prompt and make something for it#fic art edits literally whatever#to be posted here or ao3 or instagram or wherever else#because it could be fun and we could all hype each other up#and sometimes creativity needs a nudge#or just the chance to break from a bigger project for something short#i am waffling a lot i'm sure i'm gonna run out of tags soon but let me know if this appeals to you#even by an anon if you're shy!#this is very vague i'm not even sure what the specific event would be centred around#like should it be for a single show or everything#maybe i will open a discussion? probably not but maybe 😂#rik mayall
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Because my new f/os made me wonder about this ...
If you have an f/o who's not usually referred to by their first name, but instead their last name, a nickname, or something like a title or honorific, how to you refer to them? This can apply both to how they are addressed in-universe in their source material and/or how they are commonly referred to in the fandom.
#started wondering about this because I found myself questioning how to best refer to Veers and Piett when talking about them#(Aresko and Lyste too but the two aforementioned ones are demanding more of my attention right now😅)#personally I think I'm gonna do a mix of both#because as you can see with their last names it's much clearer who's been talked about (at least if you're in the fandom)#like more people will immediately understand when you talk about Piett and Veers vs Firmus and Maximilian#plus in-universe only their last names and titles are used as well bc military and all#I can imagine their first names may be mentioned more frequently in books but on screen they're never even spoken#however when talking in a more personal or affectionate matter I'll likely use their first names#it feels more appropriate and also I like their names :3#like with Heinz for example I'm more used to using his first name atp but for more general posts I'll also use his last name again#self ship#self shipping#self insert x canon#fictional other#f/o#self ship community#self shipping community#self ship poll#self shipping poll#polls
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GUUUYYUYSSSD !!!!!
‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
KIMONO MY HOUSE VINYL!!!!!!
Also funny story which is that when my brother took these to the cashier he said something like "oh... Sparks... they were here one year ago"
#YES THEM BEING THERE IS EXACTLY WHY I TOLD MY BROTHER TO GO THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE ('there' being tower records in japan)#but i find it so funny that the cashier actually remarked on that fact too#anyway. you need to know that i'm feeling so very AAAAHHHH right now. all of these are such a big deal to me#i didn't think i'd actually own KMH ON VINYL at any point#also utterly shocked about the guerilla toss CD. very exciting to have that one too#they're one of my fav bands and i implore everyone who likes unhinged and very experimental and cacophonic rock to check them out#this album (eraser stargazer) isn't the most accessible thing there is out there but i really love it#(i don't even know how to describe it properly. it's just really something to behold anyway)#the plushie is also a gift from my brother!! i'll gladly take any name suggestions for him#oh and also sparks debut album. first album that i own both on CD and vinyl as of today#it's not even that it's my fav sparks album or anything (i do really love it though and it's definitely somewhere in my top ten)#it's just that some albums feel more like they 'fit' with the vinyl format than CD in sound. to me at least#one other example of that besides this one being gratsax#ok i think that's all i have to say about this. one of the most epic hauls of my life that's for sure#OH WAIT one more thing. somewhat unfortunate actually#which is that my brother said he's pretty sure he saw a latte vinyl#but when he passed by that section again like 10 minutes later he already couldn't find it. oh latte.......#it's ok i'll have it one day. i'm really curious what went down there though. did someone really snag it in those 10 minutes???#and yes in case you're worried i did thank my brother profusely for getting me all this#and now i'm going to force him to listen to the TMBG vinyl with me so that he's PREPARED FOR THE CONCERT#that's in 3 months and that he's know about for a year and a half. ok i'm done now#goosepost
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i think that we often do forget that the black brothers were not inherently good people; they were more or less morally grey, more or less leaning towards the good/bad side. it's hard to fully unlearn beliefs of your family (and i think that many people resonate with this statement, whether we are talking about fictional characters or real, fully-fledged people), and i think that morally grey characters are far more interesting than people who are inherently good or evil.
sirius black
many people (including myself) would say that sirius is leaning more towards the lighter end of the spectrum, given the fact that he actively tried to unlearn his family's beliefs, he ran away from home at the age of sixteen and decided to move in with people who were recognized in the wizarding society as good people, he joined the order as soon as he finished hogwarts, and, even after the unfortunate ending of the first war, he decided to join the order again and stay inside a house that was never a home for him, to ensure the safety of himself, the order, and harry, too. his last act was the attack at the ministry where he found himself, despite the fact that he was supposed to stay inside grimmauld place, and where he died.
however, we cannot deny that sirius, too, had slip-ups. one of them was the prank (to review what happened, essentially, he told snape how to get past the whomping willow, therefore revealing remus' secret to him). in this situation, sirius shows recklessness and a lack of thought towards the consequences that his actions could have towards not only himself, but severus snape and remus, too. his behavior showed a lack of altruism, and a lack of consideration for the people around him, being willing to put them in danger for whatever may have been the reason.
another one would be swm (snape's worst memory), where james is a part of the action too, but the tormenting of snape was unjustified (j&s started the fight, and snape responded) and ended badly. now, i am in no way a defender of severus snape's, but both j&s and him were acting based on either boredom (the aforementioned) and a need for revenge caused by the actions that had happened against him (the latter).
in canon, we are also shown that he does not exactly think the words he says, and the effect they have on people. (“You're less like your father than I thought.” — GoF). i think that sirius had no right to say this to harry, who was just trying to make sure that sirius would be safe. what we need to remember is that, by the time of the action of GoF took place, sirius was still on the run, and the ministry was still looking for him; it would have been dangerous for both him and harry (and whoever might have joined them) to go out of hiding and go meet up somewhere near hogwarts (hogsmeade). harry's response to sirius' request was logical, and sirius' response was reckless and not well-thought.
regulus black
we do not have enough information on regulus to fully state on which side of the spectrum he finds himself on. however, he was known to have held the same beliefs that his parents did and to be an open voldemort supporter (The Slytherin colours of emerald and silver were everywhere, draping the bed, the walls and the windows. The Black Family crest was painstakingly painted over the bed, along with its motto Toujours Pur. Beneath this was a collection of yellow newspaper cuttings (of voldemort), all stuck together to make a ragged collage.)
therefore, to some extent, we can safely assume that he held the same beliefs as him (and, implicitly, his parents). the voldemort collage might have been on the wall for either research purposes or an act of devotion (this interesting perspective has been added by @/werewolfenthusiast) we cannot be sure; however, i am inclined to think that it might have been a mixture of both.
furthermore, i think the fact that regulus only started actively betraying and going against voldemort only after voldemort's actions had direct consequences on him and the ones he loved — kreacher, and this is shown in two acts; (wording taken off the hp wiki)
After becoming a Death Eater, Regulus began to consider abandoning Lord Voldemort, partly because his master mistreated and intended to kill the Black family's loyal house-elf Kreacher whilst setting up the security measures for one of his Horcruxes.
One day, Voldemort asked Regulus for the use of his house-elf, Kreacher and Regulus eagerly accepted as he wanted to please his master. Voldemort used Kreacher to test the defences around his locket Horcrux, leaving him to die afterwards. Kreacher was able to escape using house-elf magic and told Regulus of what had happened. Regulus worked out that the locket was a Horcrux and was the reason behind Voldemort's immortality. This was the deciding factor in Regulus's defection.
therefore, regulus has been shown to feel remorse and to start to realize the lenghts lord voldemort would go through only when his family (implicitly, his house-elf) were targeted. however, by researching horcruxes and trying to destroy one of them, regulus (un)willingly helped the wizarding world towards voldemort's fall.
all in all, the black brothers are two complex characters who, to some extent, held their family's beliefs and values. whether they had actively tried to unlearn them (sirius) or their betrayal was slow and silent (regulus), and neither of them can be fit in the category of inherently good or bad people.
#i'm just realizing right now that i kind of format this like an essay and so consider this an essay about the black brothers#and i also hope that nobody's gonna like jump at me because of this so if you don't agree with me#and if you do consider them inherently good or bad people just scroll away please#anyways i personally see characters that are not inherently good or bad for more fascinating and captivating then the ones that are#and u'd like to read more fics in which not only the black brothers but also other characters are not morally good or bad#because the very same way that people are not inherently good or bad I think that that applies to characters as well#and i try in my fics to make characters not only good or bad also offer them traits from the other side of the spectrum too#so for example if a character is majorly morally dark i'm also gonna offer them positive traits and vice versa#anyways enough rambling!!! tags#sirius black#sirius black meta#regulus black#regulus black meta#the black brothers#the black brothers meta#the noble and most ancient house of black#the noble and most ancient house of black meta#meta#my writing
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rotating the pub scene from 73 yards in my mind i think there is so much being said there about wales and welsh/english tension that is so interesting and is going so under discussed
#blahs#dw#dw spoilers#the whole thing about castles in wales being english torture centres. much to unpack#i think it's easy for most viewers to watch it and see that the characters are taking the piss and write it off#but what's interesting about it is i think rtd is basing that on real exaggerations of oppression by welsh people#most castles in wales WERE built by the english and they WERE designed to oppress the welsh. except that was like 800 years ago#and some people use this as an example of welsh oppression /now/ when it's like. not relevant to modern wales really#and 'torture chambers' is a wild exaggeration that dangerously tries to compare wales to much more recent human rights violations#i think rtd is trying to caution against a romanticised or sensationalised narrative of old wales that certain welsh nationalists have#this is also what he's doing with roger ap gwilliam#i keep seeing people say his character is 'just nukes' and i'm not gonna pretend it's The most complex politics ever#but it's also not just nukes. it's about specific political tensions and attitudes in wales.#rtd's viewpoint reminds me a lot of my dad#my dad's a proud welshman he's a native speaker he grew up in a welsh speaking community#but he doesn't really care about old welsh history about llewelyn ap gruffydd or owain glyndwr or anything like that#he doesn't see it as relevant. to him what's important is modern wales and the tensions of the 20th century#i'd wager rtd probably feels the same#and what with doctor who being produced in wales being rtd's doing i think he's enthusiastic about collaborating with england#rather than being like. isolationist about it. (that's the wrong word but i can't think of a better one)#WHICH INCIDENTALLY ties the political strand of the episode with the personal strand about ruby#who is also dealing with a self-fulfilling sense of isolation#anyway i think this episode is about wales in a very significant way. we need more welsh people writing think pieces about it#honest to god i don't think any analysis of it that doesn't talk about its welshness is quite Getting It
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*takes the one good song from a bad musical's soundtrack and wills a new better musical to form around it*
#there're a lot of examples#but the one I'm thinking of right now is You Gotta Die Sometimes from Falsettos
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halloween thing i drew for an art trade with @cherry-207 ! she asked for edgar and scri dressed as angel and devil . you can see her part here !
edgar vargas belongs to jhonen vasquez
scriabin belongs to @zarla-s
#hello . uhhhhhhhhhhh#UHHH WAIT WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN I SWEAR#i know i haven't posted a thing since like A MONTH AND I'M SORRY BUT i have a really nice excuse for this . yes .#right after posting devi's drawing my mom BROKE HER FOOT ?? WOAH !#and idk maybe i was sad or . stressed because i had to do a bunch of things my mom used to take care of and it was really stressing#this + school stuff + a drawing a day + some other things pretty much started killing me#and suddenly i was getting hives every single day after 11.30pm . yeah . it was TERRIBLE#so uh . i had to stop doing some stuff for my own wellbeing . like . drawing . for example#but it worked !#now i just have a bunch of mosquito bites on my hands . they seem to like them .#OH SO well um YEAH DRAWING#an art trade with one of my friends !!!! drawing this was honestly so fun#as you can see this is from october 25th . but i wanted to wait for brusk to finish her piece before posting it#te quedó precioso emily . valió totalmente la pena la espera . tqm#edgar's costume looked so boring next to scriabin's#he looked way prettier with wings but if i wanted to add them i would have to erase 90% of scriabin and he came out so pretty to do that#so . instead of making him wear something pretty and detailed like scri's costume i had to make him wear something you could see and think#“ oh yeah that's an angel ”#i explained this to brusk after showing her the drawing and she said#“ if you think about it . him having a traditional costume fits his character "#and i was like OH#ACTUALLY YEAH THAT'S COOL#anyways i really like this one . the colors are so pretty . i finally found a way to make my colors warm and pretty .#WELL UH THAT'S TOO MANY TAGS BYE#vargas#zarla s#vargas zarla#scriabin vargas#edgar vargas#sunny's art
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ummmmm this made me look up how this is pronounced and I was today years old when I learned it isn't pronounced the way it looks
#now I'm just thinking about other places with names like that#ones that people never get right at first guess if they're not from around there#ypsilanti for example#dionysus in wisconsin
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just going about my day idly contemplating how some of the ways hawke can interact with a romanced anders are not at all unlike how they interact with leandra (and a bit of carver too, especially with a purple hawke), and then thought about my hawke in the timeline where he romances anders and was hit straight in the face with 'was he ever actually in love, or was he just desperately trying to renegotiate with his mother's ghost in any way he could' and now i need to lie down. this is the power of dragon age 2
#'you don't know my mother' haunting me through the years#dragon age#dragon age 2#hawke#On second thought let's not go to Kirkwall; it is a silly place#there are of course as many ways to do/read that relationship as there are players to interact with it haha and all valid!#but my personal version of handers is sooo fucked up and bad times for everyone involved and I love it haha.#this is a relationship neither of them should have been in and that made everything worse and everyone unhappy in the end#locked tomb levels of the horrors of love. i ship it but in the way that I want to make it sadder and more gutwrenching each time#to be clear this is a very mutual two-way kind of fucked up but I think varric in his loyalty and love would downplay hawke's side of it#for huge swathes of their relationship anders is not in a mental place to be a good partner and the emotional blackmail is Not Okay#(but it's just like how mother used to make it! hawke's soul cries sadly as it reaches for it hungrily)#which is in some ways fair enough no one could accuse him of not warning you ahead of time fjskda#but hawke is messy about it in a way only available to a covert people pleaser who has never had a millisecond of therapy#with some added stuff that my hawke is always acespec in some form and when he gets together with anders...#is the sex something he doesn't particularly care to have or not have but it 'makes anders happy'/he longs to feel wanted *and* needed#and also a way he gets out of ever being *actually* vulnerable (which I think he'd had to be with varric for example if he Went There )#'you want the hawke who's in your head so badly and I kind of wish I were that hawke too. so let's be collaborateurs with that fantasy'#(and then maybe if I do it right every time you'll finally be happy hawke says in his heart looking at this leandra-anders phantom form)#(and echoing stuff in varric's relationship to hawke but I think the important distinction there is that varric -- is a craftsman haha#he KNOWS when he's lying/making up a story he KNOWS the difference between what is and what he wishes the world was#(I think there's some deep longing there to not know; for it to blend together or have the power to change things. but he always knows)#which ironically leaves him in a better position to actually see and understand hawke the person#even as he is creating hawke the literary figure. almost to protect him in some ways? god da2 is so full of STUFF!!! I adore it)#and of course anders gets so disillusioned with hawke's inertia and lack of action (you all but married this man anders!#you should know this about him he's already carrying the whole family and city on his shoulders if you add a gram more he'll collapse!)#and hawke feels so desperately hurt that the promise anders seemed to make that he'd be enough -- that he could fix things for him --#('I'm the one bright light in kirkwall and that apparently doesn't count for shit so I'm just slowly turning to ash for you')#turned out to be untrue. anyway. sad now. imagine them meeting like twenty years on what the fuck could you even say to each other then#(I can't imagine Hawke ever physically hurting anyone he loves so he just tells Anders to leave at the end of DA2. they COULD meet again
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I made and deleted a post about this a few weeks ago but I've been thinking a lot about projecting onto toxic ships/dynamics in fiction, and not onto the romantic parts ("I relate to Pete in Vegaspete because I want someone to unlock me to human touch") but onto the very toxic parts ("I relate to Vegas in Vegasporsche because he's lying his ass off and orchestrating Porsche's downfall, and mentally blaming Porsche for everything he's planning to do to him, for believing the wrong things and choosing the wrong side, AND for falling for Vegas's obvious facade! Dummy I've always been your enemy it's SO OBVIOUS!! Yet in the moment, when they're riding bikes or hugging and Vegas is compartmentalizing, he does genuinely care about Porsche and feel honest affection for him, and that's what sells the lie... and makes Vegas hate himself for his traitorous weakness and want to sabotage any sincere moments they have"), and how huge this distinction feels to me. So I wanted to do like a Tell me the most toxic fictional thing you overidentify with meme.
Not sure that's the best way to word it, and you don't have to (and probably shouldn't) explain why, but like. Don't tell me "I relate to Korn as a parent;" tell me "I relate to Korn when he's preventing his children from competing by pitting them against their cousins instead, because he can blame that on their grandfather and his brother and not himself, and pretend his kids are fine and it's just the cousins who are getting destroyed". Does that make sense? This way also I don't have to know your toxic blorbo to understand your toxic emotion. Anyway do it
#dear diary#or don't do it it's ok if this gets zero notes but i'm curious#(you can also just reply to this post lol)#for a long time i only related to the aspirational parts of fiction#and now this year i'm apparently in my villain era#in my 'villain but i still think i'm right and doing the right thing but it feels bad man' era#i also genuinely think it helps get through tough times to make up grandiose fictional parallels in your head#like this friend breakup sure felt shitty - why don't i compare it to an EPIC TRAGEDY WHERE THEY BOTH DIE that will make me feel better#and it does! it always does#wallowing is good sometimes#kpts#since that's where i drew all my examples#btw the vegaspete and vegasporsche examples are true statements#the korn one is not! i didn't have another toxic example to overshare from myself
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Bad time of it, all things considered (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Damned#ZEX#Blood#Just a bit but y'know - Enough#It honestly made me So sad that it took until his canonmates saw it happen that someone /finally/ acknowledged his spontaneous cuts D:#Like I get it it's dark and it's hard to see but his skin just opened up and he made a noise about it! The possible danger!!#And then by that point he's just so used to everyone ignoring it that their concern for him is barely even a factor weh ZEX ;;#Plus it's just a cool effect haha - sudden blood from nothing! Very rich mental movement#At least Max had someone concerned for him about it <3 Not that he could do anything about it but even just the validation of seeing it!#He has enough cuts on him :( Poor tenderized flesh#He gets all crabby from being sore from healing constantly haha :'D Of course he would!#One thing I found very interesting was the scar sidedness :0 Most of the examples in the gallery have his scar and missing eye opposite#But that's not necessarily the case! I actually scoured mid-read and there /are/ a couple instances of matching side!#They're very tiny so I overlooked them upon first viewing hehe ♪ But they're there! It's very interesting to me!#I like the aesthetics of the opposite - probably because I'm more used to it lol - but I can see the appeal and reasoning for the other way#I do honestly enjoy how much is open to interpretation and allowance uwu♪ And what's consistent! Like how it's always his right eye :D#That tracks hehe ♫#Haha his meeting with his delightfully inept counselor - I'm pretty sure I was actually more angry about his supposed injury than he was#He chilled out pretty quickly while I was just - A Scratched Cornea??? The disrespect!!#So happy with his eyebrow expression on that one as well ah <3#It really does make me curious for how the staff is kept there - they don't /seem/ malicious during the day! But they're also unaware#It's interesting where the lines of reality are between everyone :D Very interesting ♪#Capping off with another song my playlist is looking quite healthy now hehe#Flagpole Sitta is one of those songs that only comes up for me every half dozen years or so but when it Does - phewph#It is /such/ a ZEX song to me now hehe <3 The flirtiness and exasperation - the defeatism even! So many killer lines#I think my favourite is ''I'm not sick but I'm not well'' ask me to read into that I will I'm gonna I'll do it even if you don't ask me lol#So fun to draw those lapses in control the poor dear ♥#The digital reconstruction there was a lot of fun as well actually :D I think I nailed it :3 Pulled around from all over the page! Pleased ♪
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