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spookyboogie3 · 4 years ago

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The trope Last Minute Hookup shouldn’t be used for LGBTQ+ relationships.

AND DEFENDING MY LAST POST ABOUT THIS.

I DO NOT hate any of these pairings. A good many of them could have been handled differently by the creators, writers, and networks. But this isnt me hating the relationships or characters or shows. Just going off about how they shouldnt have been tacked on at the end of their respective series.

As of writing this all of these shows have ended their original runs. Except for Supernatural which is on its last few episodes. And Supergirl, which announced its coming to end with season 6.

LGBTQ characters and relationships aren’t as common in the media as straight-cis characters and relationships. Sure things are improving but a lot of networks and writers still don’t fully understand why representation is important why they can’t keep using the same throwaway tropes they’ve been using for the straight-cis relationships.

You could name any piece of media and find and name one character that isn’t LGBTQ+, but you can’t do this with LGBTQ+ characters. We haven’t gotten to the point where they are as common as non-LGBTQ characters.

I have a whole paper I wrote on why asexual representation is important to have in the media and the same logic applies to any part of the LGBTQ+ or anything that falls under minority.

Back to the topic on hand. The trope of “Last Minute Hookup.”

Its exactly what it sounds like. Characters get to together at the very end of the story. These characters could have a on and off again relationship, lots of ship teasing, the classic “Will They or Wont They?” trope. What makes it different for non-LGBT characters in relationships to do this, we know what these relationships look like. Not to say the that both Non and LGBT relationship cant have similar struggles, however members of the LGBTQ+ community know how hard it is to feel like your identity and self matters and is normal.

I know that the whole “will they, wont they” thing is done for drama and networks and showrunners think if they give the fans what they want that they’ll start losing viewers and they have nothing to look forward to. Which is true to some degree. But most of this comes from the writers not knowing how to fucking write relationships.

Let’s just focus on whats it like to be in a non-straight relationship.

Heres an example: you have an action series, with 2 male leads and halfway through the show, they get together. Cool. Now you have a Battle Couple.

By making LGBTQ relationships happen at the end of a series that’s already had plenty of other non-LGBTQ relationships happen before it, it makes it look like the people in charge don’t care for it or were afraid of backlash. But it’s the end of the series so its not like they can get the show cancelled or anything. (The only people who are going to lash out at LGBT couple or characters are homophobic people, we don’t want them around any way so just make stuff super gay, so they’ll leave)

This is especially a problem when the writer and network have spent the whole series queerbaiting the audience with these characters.

Side note for anyone is doesn’t actually know what queerbaiting is:

It’s a marketing technique used in entertainment, which the writer or creators hint at but then don’t actually depict sex-same romance or LGBTQ representation. They do this to attract (bait) the LGBT/queer or straight ally audience into the show with the suggestion of representation but at the same time avoiding this as not alienate other audience members *cough* (homophobes) *cough*

Definition is from Wikipedia, not a reliable source says my highschool teachers and college professors but fuck em

The Legend of Korra is a great example of Last-Minute Hookup. Korra and Asami had VERY little ship teasing, and that was in the last 2 books/seasons. Any thing that was perceived as romantic came from the fans wearing shipping goggles. So to a lot of people just casually watching, yes this looked like it came out of nowhere. Nickelodeon had some serious balls to say how brave they were for putting 2 girls into a romantic relationship.

Theres a few problems with this.

A. It never actually aired on TV (to my knowledge). The last 2 seasons of Korra were put on Nicks website.

B. The confirmation that this Korrasami was canon had to come from the creators on twitter because of how unclear it was.

C. The show did the bare minimum when it came to hooking them up in the series. They walk off holding hands (very cute btw). They didn’t even get a kiss. Aang and Katara had a Last Minute Hookup at the end of ATLA after 3 seasons of ship tease and THEY GOT A KISS. Hell the original end of LoK*, has Korra and Mako kissing. *(the first season, they didn’t know they were getting more seasons at the time, no matter what you hear the writers say, they’re full of shit)

D. Anything continuation of Korra has come in the form of comics, which her and Asami are in a fairly well written relationship. Yes, they do kiss. Yes it would’ve been great to see this stuff happen in series.

A show that handles this a little bit better is Adventure Time. Not by much though. It implied several times that Princess Bubblegum and Marceline have history together and its shown more and more in its last few seasons that there is some ship tease happening. However its not until the finale where they kiss, and they are shown in the last minute of the show cuddling together in Marcy’s house. HBO has picked up Adventure Time and has a miniseries called Adventure Time: Distant Lands, where Bubblegum and Marceline’s past relationship is shown.

I had brought up in my original post about being upset with networks making LGBTQ+ relationships canon in the last season/episode. I originally had Catradora tagged. While Catra and Adora have history together, they did not become official couple until the end of the series.

Yes, I was wrong about the network making things canon in the last episode as they’ve always had ship tease with each other, and it probably was the writers’ intent to put them together by the end. They do technically fall under the Last-Minute Hookup, however.

I wanna talk about Once Upon a Time really quick. Fans of the show were hoping and wishing for an LGBTQ couple for the show as a lot of characters, especially Regina and Emma, have alot Ho Yay moments. The showrunners weren’t going to put those two together, for whatever reasons they may have for that (im indifferent on all the shipping going on with this show). The showrunners thought to put two characters together, and hoo boy did it not make people happy. The characters they put together are Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Ruby the red riding hood, which would be fine if they had properly been developed.

The entire episode they did this in was a mess. They stopped the current arc during the season 5 episode ‘Ruby Slippers,’ to go over the characters that haven’t been seen in years, Dorothy was introduced and last seen in season 3, and Ruby was introduced in season 1 and was last seen in season 5 before ‘Ruby Slippers’. The characters get together in the same episode the meet in and are never seen again. The characters barely interacted, barely got along, and showed little to no ship tease or interest in each other and BOOM they are in love and together aaaaaannnnndd they’re gone. Other than having One Million Moms, a Christian fundamentalist organization, protest against the show and want it taken off the air (yes this really happened). The fans weren’t please with this development of the characters either.

(also Mulan was right there and already knew Ruby from a previous episode, and Mulan already is established to like girls as shown by her being in love with Aurora. Don’t know why the writers didn’t just put these 2 together but whatever I guess)

So they tried again in season 7 with MadArcher. The characters of Alice, a version of Alice in Wonderland from another realm (its complicated) and Robin, the daughter of Robin Hood and the Wicked Witch (it’s also complicated). And the writers did a lot better here. Both characters were allowed to have time together and have a history together too and it was done over the whole season. Not just one episode.

Now even though the writers decided to do something different with the last season and it could be detached from the previous 6 seasons, MadArcher is not really a Last Minute Hookup per say but still falls under my thing about it being the last season so who gives a fuck if One Million Moms gets mad us and tries to get us cancelled again.

I would like to say I have never watched a single episode of Supernatural in my life. I may one day. But as of right now my knowledge of it is coming primary from what ive seen on tumblr. You know a great source for doing research and looking for reliable information among the piles of shitposting.

From what I know from fans, the writers of Supernatural have been queer baiting for years. I mean it’s the CW, I’m not that surprised. What also wouldn’t surprise me, that by the end of the series Castiel is back and he and Dean actually start and relationship or strongly hint at starting one. I actually fear for the writer lives if they threw out a confession scene after years of queerbaiting and potential ship tease (debatable) and they don’t put them together. Fans are going to be angrier than they probably ever have been with this show and the showrunners and writers really would be known for queer baiting.

From what I know about how previous shows have done and if anyone that has ever worked on this show wants to continue living, Castiel will be back from Super Hell (is that what yall are calling it?) and he will get together with Dean. And they will fall under the Last-Minute Hookup trope and my networks make LGBTQ relationships canon last season.

One last show I want to talk about is Supergirl, which in has been recently announced that the 6th season will be the last. The show started on CBS but moved to the CW after the end of season 1. So more CW bullshit. There is no confirmation about whether the CW or any of the Supergirl writers are planning to do this, its all speculation. Supergirl is more LGBTQ friendly than some other shows on the Network. One of the main characters came out a few years ago and had a girlfriend a season and has had plenty of hookups with other ladies around the Arrowverse. They even introduced a trans-woman superhero in the form of Dreamer.

Let’s talk SuperCorp. Lena Luthor was introduced in the 2nd season and has been a major character in Kara’s life ever since her introduction. Even if she isn’t involved in the plot, Kara always goes to her to talk and check in on her and worry about her. They are best friends. Since the 2 have met, there has been plenty of Les Yay going on. The writers seem to be aware of the fans wanting SuperCorp to be canon and they keep throwing in moments like Kara and Lena struggling together or Kara carrying Lena bridal style.

Why I bring this up after the announcement of Supergirl’s final season to start next year. We may get SuperCorp. Kara has a relationship with William in the show and not a single person likes this relationship. The writers may scrap it and get put Kara and Lena together for the final season. This is a big maybe though. The Supergirl writers and crew get called out a lot for queerbaiting.

Let me know if you guys have any other examples of last season/last episode LGBTQ+ hookup.

And please let me know if you see any mistakes. This was all done in one sitting so I may have some things wrong.

Also check out the video by @aretheygayvideos on this topic too.

youtube

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oingo233 · 4 years ago

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I am loving how much thought you're putting into these ship requests ❤ so I thought I'd ask too!

I'm a heterosexual Ravenclaw female. I like to read and write. I used to peer tutor. I like to laugh. My sense of humor is pretty sarcastic. I like to play board games and watch movies and TV. I like being outside but just to relax and enjoy the weather. No camping or serious hiking for me lol. I have green eyes and dark blonde hair. Think you could do a ship for both ears? If not whichever you want is fine. 😊

You sound so awesome! (Total side note: but yall or too cool for me wtf I just adore you) I kinda went off with the marauders ship, and since I wrote so much for it I decided not to do the Lightning Era ship, which I hope you don’t mind, but if you really want one just let me know and I’ll get to it. Also sorry this took me forever, I’m the worst at posting/writing. But I hope you enjoy it! <3

Anyways, based off of everything here is what I think....

Marauders Era

I ship you with James Potter...

- He saw you were giving peer tutoring lessons so he lied and said he needed “loads of help. Please, you’d be doing me a huge favor. I’ll pay ya back?” he’d say with a wink, you’d roll your eyes and fight your smile because truth be told him and his friends always made you laugh with their pranks and you were always a little curious about this charming and handsome boy.

- You agree, in the name of education and graciousness of course. No other reason... none at all. Definitely not because he smelled good, and you knew he was passing that class with flying colors and so he had to be into you too, right?

- He was, oh god he was so into you. He spent more time staring at you than the books you used to study. It was often you’d look up to see if he was “registering” the information and he’d just be gazing up at you through his glasses, mouth slightly agape in a smile. You’d blush and ask him an on-topic question, he’d answer correctly and you’d only blush more.

- He always made you laugh till your stomach was in knots and the two of you were kicked out of the library. It was one of those time when he asked you out on your guy’s first “date”.

- The two of you were standing outside the library doors, cheeks flushed and eyes alight with humor. He told the worlds best story about his first time on a broom, and how he thought he could fly into outer-space and bring back a star for his mom. (he was very little and didn’t know any better, his dad of course was right next to him and raced after him, but James was so fast. Afterwards at dinner they scowled him, but knew he would be just great at quidditch.)

- “But it’s all true, all of it,” he says, laughing as you shake your head in disbelief. He is walking beside you as you two wander the halls, not sure where to go but not wanting to part from one another. “But I’ll tell you, nothing has ever made me feel so free. Just flying like that, nothing can hold you back.” he says, a large smile on his face. You smile up at him and his heart nearly drops.

- “Sounds nice,” You mutter, only half paying attention to your own words because James looked so kissable then. He smiled wider and walked closer to you, blushing as his nerves took over. “I could teach ya? If ya want, of course.” He asks you. Without hesitation you say yes.

- That weekend you spend the whole Saturday together, learning, it seems as though he was the tutor now. You nearly fell off the broom from laughing so hard, and James’s face would genuinely twist with worry when you would try new moves, he wouldn’t want you getting hurt. The weather was just wonderful and the brisk breeze caressed your skin, yet the sun kept you warm.

- It was on that beautiful day, that you two laid back on the field of grass to rest and enjoy the weather, he leaned over and kissed you. You were in shock and he almost pulled away, ready to apologies and die from embarrassment but then you started kissing him back and he found something he for sure liked more than flying...you.

- You two fell in love and have been dating ever since. His sense of humor is both terrible amazing puns, and sarcasm so you two are always laughing your hearts out with the rest of the Marauders or even just alone.

- You two play board games a lot because he actually started to like them around the same time he found out you did (coincidence...I think not). When you two played together he’d get so into it, he’d just stare down at the board and figure out his next move, giving you perfect time to admire him in silence. He truly was beautiful. You’d see his glasses inch down his nose, and he’d slowly push them back up, still focused.

- Whenever you let him win (rarely) he’d would boast about it all day, but it made him so happy you learned to sit there and take it, you knowing the truth about your mad skills was enough. Sirius and Remus knew it too.

- He’d always watch movies and TV with you, but only if you two were cuddled up. It’s the only thing that helped him stay still long enough to really get lost in and take in the film. His fav cuddle positions were when you’d lay in-between his legs, ontop of him, and cuddle your head on his chest, you were so warm and he’d play with your hair and give you forehead kisses .

- Or, his all time fav cuddle was when it was switched, and he was laying atop your chest. He loved how he could hear your heartbeat, and feel when you laugh. You also just run your hands through his hair and if he isn’t careful he could just fall asleep like that, zenned out and warm.

- Since you like being outside so much, but no hard activities (gurl, same!) he would always set up a picnic for the two of you. Outside on nice days, he’d cover your eyes and lead you across campus to this spot beneath a nice, shady tree. Lying underneath it would be a blanket, your favorite book and foods, and some pillows. He’s let you lay your head in his lap and he’d read aloud to you. He’d put on voices for the characters and make sarcastic commentary that always made you laugh.

- During quidditch matches he gave you his spare jersey to wear and begged you to “Just for one day, be a Gryffindor. I’ll give ya me jersey, splash some face paint on ya, and no one will tell the difference.” because he’d want for you to sit with Remus, and Sirius and Peter and cheer him on, because then he wouldn’t have to look all over the stands for his favorite group of cheerleaders. You always kissed him before a match for good luck, he swears by it.

- But he also loved that you were a Ravenclaw. He admired your intelligence, wit and creativity the most and it wasn’t like you were lacking the Gryffindor traits that he took so much pride in. He also liked the different perspective you could give him on situations considering your different houses really shaped you both individually and he spent a lot of time with fellow Gryffindors.

- He’d pull the best puppy eyes to convince you to let him read whatever you are writing. He adores every word you put on paper and even asks to keep his favorite story of yours that you’ve written so he can read it over summer.

- Overall, you both love and support one another so much! And it was a match made by cupid himself aka me

I hope you liked this!

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celesjial · 6 years ago

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han jisung growing up because for some reason we all seem to ignore this :)

our story begins with this child 👇👇

this is the braces boy who attended def academy and tbh, he still looks 48030480 times better than i ever will so lets just stop to appreciate fetus jisung’s one piercing, braces, and his accentuated cheekbones bc they’re beautiful. let’s also appreciate his melanin and his awkward lil interview he did, which you can watch here if you’d like :).

~ moving on! let’s start in 2017, with the survival show :) (also where i fell head over heels for this boy and still going strong today ✊✊) here he is in all his glory of the survival show :)

um. the cutest? honestly i’m not surprised this is the person i chose to stan? like hfakhdflkklahdf this was the day of the jyp vs. yg thing and lemme just say i was NOT okay after that episode. those tears were all induced by this lil sweetheart above :)

and while we’re on the topic of the survival show, let’s talk about the busking. here is han jisung during their first ever meeting with the fans “live show” busking, absolutely k i l l i n g it. :)

lets just? okay moving on SIGH lets enter the months of 2018. lets enjoy this gorgeousness at his best at a fansign in 2018. here’s a pic from one of the very first fansigns stray kids ever did in the beginning of january :) jisung in pink? a big yes. big big big big yes.

im not gonna mention the ears because you know what? no. i’m not putting myself through that. time skip tho, let’s head to february to this live fan meeting they did :) (jisung’s hellevator fancam on this date? is a must watch) click here to watch it full :)

i don’t get how a 17 year old could be this effortlessly ethereal? and this outfit? like uh huh? get it 17-year-old still predebut jisung GET IT :)

ugh im going crazy i miss predebut days already buuuut let’s move on to their debut stage. gosh--i remember watching this and thanking the lord minho and felix were back-but that’s a story for another day. let’s all say hello to jisung’s red? purple? copper? copper with red and purple highlights? hair and his -- sigh-- infamous mullet days. ngl i kinda miss it, even though i really hated it when i saw it the first time. nonetheless, on to debut stage han jisung! (he wanted everyone to call him han, but i gave up on that because personally i think jisung is a very pretty name and im gonna use it :))

you know what? dumbass mullet or not i still love him (all the mullet enthusiasts boutta attack me)

moooooooving on from the debut stage, let’s talk about fansigns and jisung in the i am: not era. let’s just--i think this mightve been his realization that he’s just a softy boy and so he decided to take the cutest teeny lil pics possible, because here he is enjoying life at a fansign in april 2018 :)

B U N N Y. MY BUNNY. FIGHT ME HES THE CUTEST EVER AND I LOVE HIM SO MUCH SO MUCH SO MUCH SO MUCH SO CMUCH. :)

however, the colored hair didn’t stay for very long because we were back to dark pretty soon :) something we’ll later come to miss, you’ll see :) anyways, moving on to june and this legendary stage!

this was jisung’s day and no one else’s. he murdered me, let me be buried, dug me up, and murdered me again and i was not o frickng kay. it was hot the day they performed and he was sweating like crazy and smiling and just wilding on stage and i had no words, lemme tell ya. y’all seeing him grow up yet? no? that’s okay, we’re getting there ;) let’s move on to a soft pic since i don’t think staring at this one for very long is good for your health kdhaljkfhdajhdf.

so onto july 2018! here’s an airport pic of the day he got his drink stolen and started pouting like a lil baby. he’s gorgeous and adorable and his big blue shirt and hat and stuff ughhhh aljdhflka i dkkk.

but here :)

yes. just--yes. jisung in baby blue? yes. jisung anywhere anytime? yes. yes. yes. just---yes. :)

let’s go ahead and move on to august, aka the month jisung decided it would be a great amazing time of the year to start murdering us all. let’s start off a lil bit smooth--here’s the day they were on stage and jisung decided it’d be a great idea to be crazy hot.

maybe i just got a thing for jisung in baseball caps, ya know? but maybe you’ll notice his hair starting growing longer here--and here we begin the era of the hottest person ever--long haired jisung. it is a phenomenon that no one can beat, not even get-cool era jisung because--well, you’ll see.

prepare yourself. the next pic is not a fun one to go through, trust me.

i’ll let you have a moment. take your time, breathe, it’s okay :) i go through the same thing every time i see this photo, don’t worry. but hey, do you see the growing up now? if not, before we get into the real stuff, i suggest you scroll back up and compare that very first pic you saw to this one. see it now? yeah, i thought so. and we’re not done yet.

say hello to blonde jisung! the jisung we’re gonna be seeing for a while--till the end of 2018, to be exact aljhadlkjfhadkjfhalkjdhf. this is just the beginning, kids. buckle up.

let’s move on to the i am: who unveil--prepare yourself. none of the following pics are fun. none of blonde jisung is fun. i hate blonde jisung.

here we go!

yup. i am who jisung said move out of his way, because he is the king and no one can stop him. go ahead and admire him for a bit longer. we’re nowhere near finished yet. (PS DO YOU SEE THE GROWTH CHANGE YET BC I SEE IT BICH)

anyways!!!! let’s move on to kcon thailand 2018 jisung! as in king prince jisung who can never be beat so shut up!

yup. mhm. i have no caption for this one except warning: may cause heart attacks bc i know the day the fansite pics of this came out i nearly cried and died and cried again yall know. new stans, here’s what you missed of han jisung but dont worry! i’ll always be here to introduce you to him :).

anywho! let’s do another pic from 2018 before we get on to december jisung. and january jisung of 2019. warning now--if you want to scroll past this post you probably should now, because you may actually collapse after that. but let’s have a little fun first! here’s jisung from that day yall already know--yup. this day. here we go.

yup. last blonde jisung you’ll be getting, because we are moving into 2018 jisung.

hold up. actually, i lied. you’ll get one more blonde jisung--but beware. we’re moving into award show era. ready? no? oh well, here you go anyways. let’s have king jisung from this award show--the one i cannot remember the name of but whatever :)

ah, right! the asia artist awards. ahaha the good old asas. oh well, i’m sure you don’t care about that--i mean, are you LOOKING AT THIS pIC? this day will always be remembered as the day jisung told changbin to move bitch and let him walk the center of the red carpet. anywho, yeap! this is the last blonde jisung, i swear. we’re moving into--shudder--mama era jisung. nothing else to say, here we go.

uh huh. i’ll give you a minute, don’t worry. blue haired jisung was the reign of all jisungs and fight me. FI G H T ME. what tf happened to the cute child from january? this ain’t him. this is a lil demon right here. i will never, ever get over december 2018 mama jisung. never.

but we’re not done here, tho! because the awards shows went on into january! and february! but don’t worry, i won’t kill you with all the pics. just one. let’s move on to faded silver haired-jisung, or the radiance of all the awards show of 2019.

here you go! have fun with this one! this jisung was out to kill us all--i still don’t think i’m over it, ya know? but like, whatever. i’m just out here tryna bias this satan of a person, you know. that’s how it be.

aannddd finally, let’s move on to current han jisung. han jisung right now. han jisung on march 25, 2019, as in exactly one year after he debuted. let’s take a look at what han jisung looks like these days. :)

here we have a nice old han jisung from just a couple of days ago! isn’t that great? we love this man.

i hate him get the demon away from me lord help me--

but let’s just appreciate his growth. ngl, i didn’t think he could change much when i was watching the survival show because of how gorgeous he was already, but god damnit he did and he killed me several times along the way. a

and that was the story of han jisung since debut! still don’t see the growth, scroll back up, don’t read my inserts, and look at the last pic again. i’m sure you see it by now. let’s appreciate han jisung growing up everybody! i’m totally not crying, and you aren’t either. but yeah!

i love him a lot and you should love him too, even when he had braces because he was a cute lil mtf back then and i miss him a lot.

but yeah! that’s it i have no closure for this post so goodbye :)

#stray kids #han jisung #why did i do this #watch no one see this #sigh

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cs-discourse · 5 years ago

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since ghost wants a defending post i will also make one

hi! as yall seem to commonly know me since it was my user before i changed it, im star child. im that overgrown cow that's smearing names and causing drama whats up

i would be a mature adult and DM you ghost but honestly i know you'd probably just spend ages trying to defend yourself fruitlessly and also i have you blocked so whatever

here's the screenshots i have available (sent to me by very kind users in the chat who felt i should know what was being said after i left) and my comments to go along with it

some background: this discussion was happening in a channel called 'real-images'. a place where you would not expect a conversation about docking to be taking place.

i clicked into this channel to see what was happening and as you know, with discord, it automatically puts you on the oldest unread message when you click into that chat. i was greeted by conversations about cropping and docking - choke chains may have been mentioned, im unsure, because as soon as i saw the conversation i began to feel sick and so clicked out without skimming through the convo.

i went into 'questions' and asked if they had a way of requesting certain topics to be tagged and that's pretty much where this begins.

first i'd like to say 'don't enter the channel' hey ghost, how was i supposed to know that clicking into a channel to share pictures would lead to me walking into a conversation about my trigger? are you really going to blame me for that, huh?

second, this was me literally asking slash 'speaking up' about the topic. why was there any need to get this passive aggressive over it? i put in a request. you could have said yes. you could have said no. you could have said 'sorry we can't blacklist it but we'll try to ask people to spoil it or put a warning'. instead you told me to 'go off' and put :) which yeah we all know what that emoji means you weren't being friendly or subtle

we all know neons a big advocate for choke chains and shock collars as well as whole host of other mistreating animals. i'll make a second submission on that if people care but neons animal care? whack. bro i hope you grow up and learn to look after your pets.

anyway, mods please tell me why neon was allowed to get involved and say 'they just let their opinions get the better of them and speak out of turn' to be greeted with agreements and being told it was fine when it really wasn't fine.

Spooky Rabbit, i dont know who you are but you're cool. you made me a little less upset but it was a little too late bud

it's really nice how this convenient controversial chat only popped up after i started talking about the way i was treated in another chat huh. a whole half hour later when i'd already posted screenshots and vented and let people know what happened. love the damage control here

anyway

'speak up' once again yeah i did that and look where it got us all, Joke

something said to me outside of cottontails but this is in retaliation to the 'why didnt you speak up earlier' other than the simple fact i wasnt there lol. neon always likes to talk about these nasty little dog topics. if i'd butted into a convo i hadnt been a part of previously and said 'can we not discuss this?' i'd love to bet a whole 25$ that ghost would've told me to just mute the channel, or neon would've ignored me or told me to "just not argue uwu". either way y'all were going to get angry at me for my trigger.

'don't want to butt in with my opinion but-' neon all you ever literally do is butt into conversations its practically your only personality trait other than mistreating ur animals lol. 'made things difficult' 'i'm vocal about my opinions' and then telling me to shut up about mine? okay if you say so.

Adam, 'we can't blacklist every topic users find uncomfortable' I'd like to point out again that a literal trigger is something very different to being uncomfortable! and on top of that it wasn't like i was asking you to trigger tag mentions of a popular character, or a food, or a language, or a colour. i was asking you to trigger tag a very controversial conversation centered around cropping, docking, and choke chains. an extremely heavy topic. not a minor inconvenience.

cool cool yall were making fun of ppl with triggers. nice

from a PM from cinna after i PM'd her about transfering my rabbit out of species - no cinna, they weren't blunt, they were just mean. simple as.

ik ppl dont wanna read text walls so this is mostly at ghost who claims im a harrasser and an abuser because i dont like neon using choke chains and shock collars

oh!! also conviently gonna add that "come for our side of the story" - you know one of your staff did that right? they went to a species owner of a species im involved in and tried to get me banned for causing drama? but didnt give any information or screenshots, and i had to provide them all to the owner to make sure the whole story was out? convenient how you just forget screenshots when they make you look bad.

this is long so

tl;dr ghost was p nasty abt the convo. they made fun of people being sensitive. they told me my trigger was a minor inconvenience and not important enough to tag. they only added a controversial topic after i kicked off because they didnt want their asses in trouble. neon got involved and isnt even staff so idk why they did.

anyway that's the news from your local drama queen, im gonna go chew on some grass now moo moo bitch

#cs discourse #submission

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soundofseventeen · 6 years ago

Text

Friends to More (Wen Junhui)

Hello!! I wasn’t going to post tonight, but I have to wait for my hair to dry before I can go to bed and I have personal reasons for wanting to post Hoshi’s tomorrow, so moving on! (I love this one mostly as an ex-theater kid so sorry if I ramble) Time for Juntree! -Erin

I’m sorry I had to use this gif it’s the only one dramatic enough for this

You and Jun met your first day of theater as freshman

You were the only two who didn’t do theater prior to that day

You just decided it could be fun and wanted a way to make friends

Unfortunately everyone kind of knew each other from prior activities and had their little friend groups

So when Jun saw another human just standing by themselves not really connecting with any of the groups

BOY CLUNG TO YOU IMMEDIATELY

And you were just like

“EXCUSE YOU WHO ARE YOU”

“LISTEN I NEED A FRIEND YOU NEED A FRIEND WE’RE FRIENDS NOW”

You thought it just a first day thing

He’d leave you alone after that

BUT

You guessed it. He did not

For an upcoming production he got a minor roll as a villager it’s yall first year what do you expect

You were on the stage crew as part of the make up crew

First rehearsal boy found you in like 20 seconds and immediately sat next to you

“Excellent I now have a ninja on the inside”

“Who even are you”

JUN WAS HURT HIS NEW FRIEND FORGOT HIM

Then he realized he never told you his name

So you were like okay this Jun guy isn’t gonna forget I guess

It ended up working out pretty well

He always came to you for make up help the rest of your crew scared him so he was like obviously i’m going to my best friend

You then thought it would be just a theater friendship

Until the next year when you two had the same lunch

Boy sat with you every day

Thus you admitted you were friends with Jun

Minghao always claimed that you were the second best friend but even he knew that you were first in Jun’s eyes

As the years went on he went more into the actor side of things, gradually getting bigger rolls until he even got a lead

You kept going up the ladder on the techie side of things, eventually even leading your own crew and being a stage manager for a show or two

But everyone knew that despite techie-actor-wars or disagreements

You and Jun were always together and on the same side

You never took part in that stuff

“Man the actors think they’re so cool” a fellow techie would say

“Yeah they are cool they gotta do all this” You would defend

“The techies are really annoying with all their rules about stuff like it’s my prop let me take it” an actor would tell Jun

“Come on this wouldn’t be happening without them let them do things their way they just can’t lose stuff” Jun would defend

those are actual quotes from when I did theater techie-actor wars are serious my dudes

Y’all just stood up for each other and understood that without one the productions couldn’t happen

He liked to cook, and you had your mind full of techie leader things, so he would often bring extra food for you to eat during rehearsals

He’d even take your stuff and hide it so you would sit and eat for 10 minutes

well okay it only happened once because you were furious so now he just tries to make you eat WHILE you look at stuff

When he was tired and didn’t have to be on stage for a while

You’d let him sleep in the booth

He was the only actor allowed in the booth perks of befriending the stage manager

Each show he would get ALL the flowers

People he didn’t even know would give him flowers

He’d always share with you and congratulate you on a successful show

You didn’t realize you’re crush on him until your last year

You did a show where the two main characters fell in love cliche shh

And of course since Jun got the lead, he had to be one of them

He was really nervous about this topic

So you worked with him on it and read lines with him to try and get the emotions right

He did amazing

So amazing your own heart started to beat like crazy

“Was that good?” He asked, suddenly turning back into his own self

He was so good at turning the actor switch on and off

“Yeah. Yep. Uh huh. I think that was it. Good night Jun.” You said and bolted, handing him his script quickly and barely looking at him.

You told yourself it’s just because Jun was a good actor

Obviously that’s the only reason you were reacting this way

He was just THAT good

Until you were at rehearsal

And that scene came up

And let me tell you

It was AWKWARD

The female lead did solid, couple stumbles here and there on lines, small notes, nothing too bad

But Jun was OFF

His lines were all right and he didn’t miss a beat

But it wasn’t... there

The feeling that was in it the other day

The way that he looked at you

The emotion in the way he delivered his lines

It just…

Wasn’t there

You were so confused as you tapped your nose with your pen, eyebrows scrunched towards the stage

“What’s wrong?” Minghao, your costume crew leader, asked looking through his notes

“Jun’s off. I ran this scene with him the other day and he did so well. I’m just trying to figure out why?” Minghao almost dropped his notes, causing you to turn to him

“Wait, he ran the scene with YOU?”

You raised an eyebrow at him

“...Yeah?”

“Interesting…”

“What why? Why is that interesting? I always run scenes with Jun?”

“Nothing, he just talked to me about that. He seemed a little panicked afterwards” He shrugged, leaving the booth quickly.

Leaving you even more confused

Because lil did you know

After you ran away the other day

Jun stayed there for about 20 minutes trying to calm himself down

He felt like he just confessed to you

I mean, with the way he looked at you and the way he said his lines which were a confession in themselves

He kind of did, and it didn’t feel wrong

It all suddenly made sense for him

And that freaked him out

It literally sat in his head all weekend he spent most of it on the phone with Minghao

So when the director called an end to rehearsal and he saw you walk towards him

He became so nervous

Because he knew you noticed his off performance literally everyone did it was so out of character for him

And he knew he would have to explain why

“Bruh, what happened?” You asked, finally stopping ahead of him as he sat on a set piece

“I don’t know… It just wasn’t happening today I guess?”

“But we had it!”

“Could we run it again? It’s gonna bug me if I can’t get it”

“Jun you’re tired. Just go home and rest and we’ll work on it tomorrow.” You sighed, setting down your script.

“Please Y/N” You looked at him and sighed, picking up the script again.

“Do you want to just do lines or blocking too?”

“Just lines. I gotta get that down.” He said standing up

And you two started the scene, him delivering his lines and you reading them from the script

It started out rough like rehearsal had went, but slowly as the scene went on and Jun made more eye contact with you, it became more comfortable

More like the other day

“See that was great! You just gotta figure out how to do it with her now.” You shrugged, closing the script.

“Wait can we do the end again, just before she runs out of the room? The blocking always feels weird for that part.”

“Jun I want to go to sleep”

“I’ll bring you extra spicy noodles tomorrow” boy knew your weakness

“Okay, you pick the line.” you groaned standing up

He started saying his lines, standing in front of you

Then just before the last line

Just as the character you were reading was supposed to run off the stage

Jun ad-libbed

And his lips were on yours

It lasted all of 4.3 seconds

“OH MY GOD I’M SO SORRY” Jun shouted to a thankfully empty theater “I SWEAR I DIDN’T MEAN TO. IT JUST HAPPENED I’M SO SORRY PLEASE DON’T HATE ME IT’LL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN OH MY GOD”

Jun ran backstage, and you stood frozen on the stage

Jun kissed you

And you didn’t hate it

You set the script down and followed Jun backstage, finding him sitting in front of the mirror with his head in his hands

“Jun…”

“Look I’m sorry my head is in such a… feely place and I know we’re friends and I totally crossed a line and I would really appreciate it if you just forgot it happened I’m so sorry-”

“What if I don’t want to forget it?”

“Wait what” Jun looked at you standing up

“I don’t think I want to forget it… I mean if you want to forget about it we can and I swear I will never mention it to you again and we can just go back to before and it’ll be fine we just-”

Jun had kissed you again

And then you were both a giggling mess

Minghao found you just giggling together he had to fix some costumes and was just heading out

“About time.” Was all he said, walking past the two of you to exit the theater.

#seventeen #seventeen au #seventeen imagines #seventeen drabbles #seventeen fic #seventeen fluff #seventeen oneshot #seventeen x reader #wen junhui #jun #jun au #jun imagines #jun drabbles #jun fic #jun fluff #jun oneshot #jun x reader #seventeen jun #friends to more au

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cheekymochiiii · 6 years ago

Text

100 Year’s Quest Chapter 18-20 Tea Time

*camera pans to me sleeping on loveseat only to be woken up by my producer throwing a mug at my face*

Me: Mother*beep*! damn it Craig you *beep*! throw that at my mother *beep* face again and I’ll cut your *beep* off and shove it up your—

*screen displays message that says: please stand by*

*screen returns and shows me sitting with my cup of tea cool as a cucmber*

Me: *clears throat* Sorry about that. I haven’t been getting much sleep lately and as a result I’ve been *says through gritted teeth while glaring at Craig* very irritable.*relaxes* I realize I haven’t aired any shows since Chapter 17, but if you haven’t read the new chapter of Fairy Tail’s 100 Year Quest then that is your fault and I’m not bothering to put a spoiler warning right now. Despite my doubts to having a guest on today’s tea time, production—I mean I thought it would be best to have one anyway. Today we’ve got someone who is on Team Natsu and has had a front row seat to all the exciting *beep* that’s been happening in chapters 18-20.

Me: *gesutres to side of stage* Please audience give a warm welcome to the little braveheart Wendy Marvell!

Wendy: *walks in waving with her cute smile* Hi everyone it’s good to see you all!

Me: *admiring her adorable innocence and then remembers I have a show to shoot * Thank you so much for coming on the show Wendy it means the world to me.

Wendy: Well I heard from Panther Lily and Carla that you’re really...*hesitates to find right word* passionate.

Me: Awe that is a very accurate word to describe me, especially considering I’m a Pisces but sometimes I’m an Aquarius. It depends which website you read but for the most part I identify myself as a Pisces more than an Aquarius.

Wendy: *confused* you don’t look like two fish to me or like the terrifying Aquarius I know.

Me: *laughs at her innocence* actually Wendy here in my world our zodiac signs are given to us based on the month and day we are born in. Each zodiac is given a season in the year.

Wendy: then what happens?

Me: absolutely nothing. zodiacs are basically there just to make excuses for ourselves and how we act.

Wendy: so it’s like...alcohol?

Me: *considers this and shrugs* I mean you’re not wrong. Anyway we’re getting way off topic. Let’s focus back on what’s been happening in your world or at least in chapters 18-20. Most of these chapters were pretty *beep* short so there’s that but I’ll take whatever dose of Fairy Tail I can get.

*production tells me in my ear piece I need to stop cursing due to Tumblr restrictions and reminds me I could get flagged for being inappropriate again*

Me: *states outloud* that’s what the beeps are for you mother *beeps*

*production slaps forehead*

Me: Sorry for that interruption Wendy. My producers are being a bunch of *beep*

Wendy: *stunned at language*

Me: *continues casually* I’m not going to focus too much on Chapter 18 because I’ve already briefly talked about it in my last show. I want to give a simple summary of it. For starters I want to talk about you Wendy and what a bad *beep* you were for being able to find a spell that allowed the non-dragon slayers of Team Natsu to actually do some harm to the dragons y’all will be fighting. Naturally, I’m curious about how obtained this spell but I’m assuming you nor the creators will be willing to share that information with me.

Wendy: *genuine tone* I’m really sorry but I can’t share that.

Me: Coming from you, I’m okay with it. So Team Natsu is officially in the battle with the Water God Dragon and boy are y’all struggling. He’s just really letting y’all have it with his magic and this is still only the first dragon y’all have to defeat for this quest.

Wendy: This Quest will definitely be the hardest one I’ve ever had to do.

Me: You guys have been through so much you barely got a breather.

Wendy: I like the adventures with my friends though. It makes my life more full.

Me: Awe

Audience: Awe

Readers: Awe

Me: You are so precious Wendy and you need to be protected at all times. I’m getting off topic again. Chapter 18. Team Natsu. Battle with Water God Dragon. *stops short statements* I mean, that’s basically it. *remmebers* oh yeah Touka defeated all of your guild mates back in Magnolia.

Wendy: I know I was worried about them too. I still am since you guys haven’t figured out what happens.

Me: *waves and says nonchalantly* I’m sure by the next chapter we will. *wonders internally have I been spelling Touka’s name wrong this whole time?*

Wendy: What makes your so sure?

Me: We’ve been focused a lot on Team Natsu these last few chapters, so I’m going to assume with the screaming-into-pillow ending the creators gave us. The scenery will most likely change come next chapter. Anyway, now it’s Chapter 19 and we are still worried about the favorite team in the world, Team Natsu. Y’all are putting up a good fight but it’s not doing much good. In fact, Natsu tries very hard with all kinds of new and secret spells he’s been holding back from us to defeat the Water God Dragon. However, it nearly becomes too much for our favorite pink haired weirdo hero and he begins to be sucked up into a deadly looking whirlpool created by the Water God Dragon.

Wendy: *nods at the memory* I remember. We were all worried about what was going to happen to Natsu.

Me: *sideglances* even Lucy?

Wendy: *doesnt get what I’m hinting at* yes of course she’s always worried about Natsu on missions and if he might get hurt. Natsu too. They both want to protect each other.

Me: *grinning* most interesting *sips tea* Natsu nearly gets sucked into the whirlpool when ta-dah! *makes spirit fingers* a scaley hand snatched Natsu from it. I had a strong feeling from that ending that the hand was extremely reminiscent of a certain dragon we all love...loved.

Wendy: *nods solemnly* Natsu’s father Igneel. All of us lost our parents that day too unfortunately but not in the same way Natsu lost his tragically.

Me: *trying not to cry* I hear that *sniffles* so that’s how we are left in Chapter 19 those bastard creators. *pauses* hey why wasn’t that bleeped?

*production informs me that bastard isn’t that bad of a word compared to the ones I had been using and reminds audience that this show is for mature audiences only despite the bleeped out words because beeping everything is a struggle for the editing team*

Me: okay now it’s on to the most recent update, Chapter 20. We find out that scaley hand that rescued Natsu is indeed a dragon! We, being the readers, also notice how incredibly and unmistakingly similar this dragon and Igneel look.

Wendy: We were all honestly terrified when this dragon revealed himself. We didn’t know whether he was there to help or hurt us.

Me: Understandable I mean look at that thing. However we find out he’s mostly there to motivate Natsu to defeat the Water God Dragon and ultimately decides the best way to help Natsu is to set the fish city on fire using its own fire. While this seemed discouraging the dragon wants Natsu to consume the fire so it will help him defeat the Water God Dragon. The dragon also says he wants to fight Natsu at his best himself. So why does this mysterious Igneel-looking dragon want to help Natsu and also fight and defeat Natsu? Well that’s what the big reveal of this chapter was.

Me: *takes dramatic pause*

Wendy: *smiles knowingly*

Audience: *holds breath*

Readers: *yawns*

Me: *SHOUTS* ITS IGNEEL’S MOTHER *BEEP* SON YALL. *STANDS UP CAUSING TEA TO SPILL* HIS “TRUE” SON. AND BOIIIIII I’D BE LYIN IF I SAID THAT BOI AINT FINE BECAUSE HE IS ONE GOOD LOOKIN DUDE. I MEAN DO YALL SEE THOSE TATTOOS?!? ALSO WHAT THE *BEEP* DOES THIS MEAN? HES A FIRE GOD DRAGON! HO-LY HELL

Wendy: *nervously sips her tea and realizes why Panther Lily and Carla called Me intense*

Me: *still raging* I JUST CANT BELIEVE IT! I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING AND IVE GOT A FEELING ITS GONNA BE GOOD *relaxes and sits back down* Just wow Wendy I cant wait for what this Quest has in store for us because we are only 20 chapters in and it’s been ridiculous.

Wendy: *still smiling* I know it’s an exciting quest and adventure that truly tests the feelings, will, and strength of our team.

Me: *tearing up* I can only imagine. I can’t wait to get to the end of this long and winding road but I also want it to last forever because I don’t want Fairy Tail to end.

Wendy: *stunned* what do you mean, end?

Me: *saddened* we originally weren’t going to find out what happened to y’all on the 100 Year’s Quest but then, thanks to this super cool and awesome fandom, we were able to push the creators to continue the manga.

Wendy: Wow we really owe a lot to our fandom then

Me: *nods respectingly* yes yes we do. I know I owe a lot to my followers here on the blog, er, show.

Wendy: Why’s that?

Me: Apparently 500 people like my blog, I mean show, enough to follow me for every time I post something new. *begins meaningful speech* I couldn’t be more happy or thankful for every single one of them. I never imagined I would have this many followers because I started with 0 followers and had no connections or friends on here who already had followers and give shout outs to me, right away of course, but now people seem to like what I post and I literally couldn’t be more thankful for them. I post for them.

Wendy: *tearful* that was a really lovely speech.

Me: thanks Wendy. I suppose I should make an edit dedicated to all of them.

Wendy: that’s a nice gift and very kind of you.

Me: no *shakes head and looks off into the distance* how kind of them.

To be continued...

14 notes · View notes

ezragold · 6 years ago

Text

With a Little Help from My Friends

A/N: Happy last-day-of-Pegoryu-week! Let’s celebrate by reading... day 2′s prompt... No one ever said I was good at preparing things, okay. AO3 link: [here]

Day 2: First Date

Title: With a Little Help from My Friends

Rating: Teen

Summary: Ryuji has successfully asked Akira out! Now if only he could figure out something special for them to do. All of his ideas just feel like their every day routine, and he’s pulling his hair out trying to come up with a way to make it special. All of the thieves seem to have their own ideas of the perfect date, 90% of which are entirely unhelpful, as Ryuji soon realizes.

[ THURSDAY, 6:50PM ]

crossbonez is online

crossbonez has entered The Dungeon of Unspeakable Acts

crossbonez: GUYS I NEED HELP

crossbonez: ALSO WTF WHO CHANGED THE CHANNEL NAME

palette-cleanser: There’s no need to yell about it.

crossbonez: YOU CAN’T HEAR ME SMARTASS

killerqueen: Futaba renamed it and I can’t figure out how to change it back. What’s wrong?

memejed: me! muahaha!!!! you’ll never figure out how to change it back!

memejed: boo makoto types too fast :(

palette-cleanser: Futaba, naturally.

palette-cleanser: Oh.

memejed: lmaooooo

crossbonez: ok ok is akira in this chat??

yougimmethecrepes: I mean technically

yougimmethecrepes: but I think he’s had this channel muted for like a month

killerqueen: Understandable.

crossbonez: o sick

crossbonez: OK SO I ASKED HIM OUT AND I NEED ADVICE

yougimmethecrepes: OMG RYUJI

memejed: GHIDNDOSKFHSKX WHAAAAT

killerqueen: !

yougimmethecrepes: DID HE SAY YES??

palette-cleanser: My most heartfelt congratulations!

crossbonez: of course he said yes wtf guys

crossbonez: why wouldn’t he, i’m a catch

memejed: so’s a big ol slimy fish

memejed: its perspective

crossbonez: can we ban her?

killerqueen: She’s the room admin.

memejed: IM ADMIN MY CITY NOW

memejed: HECK how do u type so much faster than me????

crossbonez: OH MY GOD CAN WE FOCUS ON ME PLEASE

palette-cleanser: something tells me you wouldn’t allow us the chance to do anything different.

yougimmethecrepes: go ahead Ryuji, what’s up?

crossbonez: i didn’t think about what we should do on the date so i kinda panicked when he asked and told him i had everything taken care of but i don’t

crossbonez: ive never taken care of anything in my life

crossbonez: please help yall know im not smart

yougimmethecrepes: omg THAT’S what ur worried about??? HOE ur best friend is a dating expert. I gotchu

crossbonez: lmfao ann youve never been on a date

yougimmethecrepes: maybe not

yougimmethecrepes: but i have seen so many romcoms

crossbonez: oooooo my god Kill me

crossbonez: wait holy shit have any of you even been on a date before

crossbonez: NOW YOU ALL STOP TYPING

crossbonez: this is the worst i hate my life

yougimmethecrepes: yusuke if you say anything about painting my nude as a date i’ll block you

palette-cleanser: There was that time when Ann came to the old studio in order for me to paint her portrait.

palette-cleanser: It was already half-written when you sent that.

yougimmethecrepes: OHHH MY GOD

palette-cleanser: I didn’t want to just let the reply go to waste.

yougimmethecrepes: BLOCKED

palette-cleanser: :(

killerqueen: Okay.

killerqueen: I’ll DM you, Ryuji.

crossbonez: oh thank god

[ THURSDAY, 7:04 PM ]

[ killerqueen has sent you a message! ]

killerqueen: Firstly,

killerqueen: good for you, asking out Akira! That was really brave. How did it go, if that’s not too intrusive?

crossbonez: fine I think?? morgana kept cockblocking me but he got bored of watching us watch bad movies and left so

crossbonez: i just kinda

crossbonez: asked

crossbonez: and he said yeah

crossbonez: so now im dead and going thru w the date is my hell

killerqueen: Okay, relax. Obviously he wouldn’t have said yes to the date if he wasn’t already interested, so you already have that going for you! The worst part is done.

killerqueen: All you have to do now is think of something special for the two of you to do together.

crossbonez: yeah that’s basically the part where my brain stops

killerqueen: Fair. What’s your budget?

crossbonez: uhhhhhh

crossbonez: uhhhhhhhhhhh

killerqueen: Ryuji.

crossbonez: is free an option

killerqueen: Oh, god. Okay.

killerqueen: I didn’t realize you hadn’t planned for this in… any capacity.

crossbonez: OF COURSE I HAVENT ITS LIKE YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW ME

crossbonez: I DIDNT THINK OF THE MONEY THING OK

crossbonez: I WAS SORT OF FOCUSED ON NOT THROWING UP ON HIM AS I ASKED

killerqueen: Message received.

killerqueen: I’ll see if there’s anything cheap going on in the city this weekend.

crossbonez: thank you ugh

crossbonez: was this a bad idea

killerqueen: Asking out Akira? No, of course not.

crossbonez: sigh

killerqueen: Lying to Akira about having the entire thing prepared and planned out? Yes, without a doubt.

crossbonez: COOL THANKS MOM

crossbonez: GOD

[ crossbonez left the conversation. ]

[ THURSDAY, 7:29PM ]

[ palette-cleanser sent you a message! ]

palette-cleanser: Are you still taking advice for your date?

crossbonez: the answer is technically yes but i can’t say i’ve reached the point in my life where i’m ready to take dating advice from you

palette-cleanser: I shall try and keep my advice more general, then.

crossbonez: just don’t say the word beauty

palette-cleanser: You should consider the benefit of surrounding yourselves with beautiful things. I can only imagine a relationship increasing in intensity when the couple is surrounded by overwhelming beauty.

palette-cleanser: In my defense, my reply was half-written when you posted yours.

crossbonez: what the hell would overwhelming beauty even be man

crossbonez: am i sposed to find out which flower gives him boners like what am i doing here

palette-cleanser: that is up to you! And Akira, I suppose.

palette-cleanser: I was, of course, referring to your beautiful surroundings being up to you. Akira getting an erection is less-so in your hands.

palette-cleaner: …I did not mean for that to become a double-entendre but I suppose that’s also appropriate to your situation.

crossbonez: hoo boy you are this close to my block list lemme tell ya

palette-cleanser: Please don’t, my contact list is very short as it is.

palette-cleanser: Back to the topic at hand,

crossbonez: yeah plz

palette-cleanser: What are some things that Akira finds beautiful?

crossbonez: man i don’t know

crossbonez: uhh

crossbonez: good coffee

crossbonez: big ass cheeseburgers

crossbonez: cats probably

crossbonez: hes got a risette poster in his room but i think that’s less because shes hot and more because someone gave it to him and he was too nice to throw it out

palette-cleanser: None of that sounds particularly beautiful…

crossbonez: OH WOW DOES IT NOT

crossbonez: REALLY

palette-cleanser: There is no need to raise your typeface at me.

crossbonez: sjdjcickgmsoakfb

palette-cleanser: ?

crossbonez: nothing dont worry abt it

crossbonez: im gonna go see if i can buy something beautiful for ¥200

palette-cleanser: Many beautiful things in life are free.

crossbonez: you got an example to go with that inspirational quote?

crossbonez: duuuude?

palette-cleanser: I appear to be losing connection

crossbonez: oh my god dude

palette-cleanser: I can hardly read what you’re writing

crossbonez: thats not how that would even work

crossbonez: i cant tell if ur trolling me or not

[ palette-cleanser has left the conversation. ]

[ THURSDAY, 7:49PM ]

[ yougimmethecrepes has replied to your message! ]

crossbonez: plz tell me ur just invisible

crossbonez: ur my one last hope and god is that saying something about how my standards have fallen

yougimmethecrepes: doing homework

yougimmethecrepes: you still peeing your pants over date night?

crossbonez: you still willing to give bad advice?

yougimmethecrepes: imagine me swiping all of my school work off my desk onto my floor because if my math grade didn’t ride on this I would have done that

crossbonez: aight

yougimmethecrepes: also my advice is fantastic shut up

yougimmethecrepes: okay, lets start easy. What’s the budget?

crossbonez: im in high school and not a part time model

crossbonez: my budget is negative

yougimmethecrepes: ooooh

yougimmethecrepes: got it

yougimmethecrepes: arcade? you can just use small change and stuff

crossbonez: we go there ALL THE TIME thats not a date

crossbonez: that’s like going to the ramen shop or something

yougimmethecrepes: uh……batting cages? Movie?

crossbonez: i cant ask him on a date and then just do shit we do normally! how is that a date???

yougimmethecrepes: How is it not a date?? You guys always have fun doing that, how is it less fun on a date

yougimmethecrepes: OH WAIT NO I got it

yougimmethecrepes: bathhouse

crossbonez: shut up no

yougimmethecrepes: hey, it’s not my fault you gave this absolutely no thought whatsoever

crossbonez: UGH I KNOW

crossbonez: WHY IS THIS HARD

yougimmethecrepes: I KEEP TELLING YOU THAT IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE

yougimmethecrepes: YOU’RE MAKING THIS A PROBLEM

[ crossbonez has left the conversation. ]

[ THURSDAY, 8:25 PM ]

[ memejed sent you a message! ]

crossbonez: no

memejed: before you say anything

memejed: jdcjdjnfdkdkf

memejed: dammit how do all of you type so fast

memejed: it’s like I don’t even know myself any more

memejed: is it my tiny hands

crossbonez: i do not want dating advice from you

memejed: well then it’s a good thing I don’t have any for you then ISNT IT

memejed: I just wanted to tell you that Akira just got home and he’s smiling a lot and it’s gross and weird and most likely your fault, so

crossbonez: oh that’s

crossbonez: nice to hear thank you jhgjfyjuh

memejed: he just told sojiro about the date and sojiro offered to grab him condoms hahAHAAHAH

crossbonez: OH MY GOD

crossbonez: DONT TELL ME THAT SHIT

memejed: IM ACTUALLY GONNA CHOKE LOLLL

crossbonez: I HOPE SO

memejed: >:(

memejed: I don’t even get why youre so nervous he’s obviously out of his mind happy to go out with you

memejed: whatever you guys do he’ll be down

memejed: just don’t do any stupid shit like try and show off or act like a tool

memejed: which I realize may seem daunting for you

memejed: but I believe u may have it in you, maybe

crossbonez: I just have no idea what to do without us doing the same shit as always

memejed: whats wrong with doing the stuff you guys always do? Routine is comfy

memejed: comfort is the enemy of anxiety

memejed: well, comfy, and a good pair of sweatpants

memejed: *and valium

crossbonez: you dont think he would mind doing shit we do all the time?

memejed: oh my god are ALL boys as stupid as you??? how has the species survived for so long

memejed: just hold his hand or something and he’d let you push him in front of the subway!! Like, that probably shouldn’t be your go to option, but just

memejed: he ALREADY likes you. you don’t need to impress him or anything

memejed: consider yourself lucky, because like, idk how you swung that

crossbonez: I agree with you too much to get mad at that

crossbonez: wow

crossbonez: akira agreed to go out with me, you gave me advice that wasnt steaming dog shit

crossbonez: maybe i should buy a lottery ticket lmao

memejed: LMAO ur luck stat isn’t THAT high yet

memejed: see if sojiro comes through w the condoms first

crossbonez: okay and NOW im leaving

memejed: BE SAFE!!

[ crossbonez has left the conversation. ]

[ THURSDAY, 9:22 PM ]

[ HaruOkumura sent you a message! ]

HaruOkumura: Good, you’re still online!

crossbonez: hahaha what happened to ur screenname?

HaruOkumura: The company’s social media adviser suggested I change it for professional purposes………..

crossbonez: lame

HaruOkumura: Yes apparently “BigBangIsPeople” is not an appropriate username for the incoming CEO of Okumura Foods.

HaruOkumura: I thought it was funny :(

HaruOkumura: But anyway! I’m glad you’re still online! Makoto texted me and told me about yours and Akira’s date and I wanted to say congratulations and I’m so happy for you!

crossbonez: thanks! tell makoto to quit snitchin tho

HaruOkumura: Will do! I just wanted to talk because Makoto said you were very stressed out and seemed sort of unprepared

crossbonez: im okay now i think

crossbonez: futaba helped me out

crossbonez: weirdly

crossbonez: i mean im still sweating all over myself and the idea of actually meeting up with akira for the date in question makes me want to gag but :) im fine

HaruOkumura: oh my :o

HaruOkumura: Have you decided what the two of you will do?

crossbonez: yeeaaahhhh i got some ideas i think?

HaruOkumura: I do as well!! Would you like to hear them?

crossbonez: hey i am always up for not thinking

HaruOkumura: That’s great!! Okay, what is your budget currently?

crossbonez: gkhskdfkjlghlrihvoirhgiu

crossbonez: kjghsiuergtiughpijiuprughtuislrhgiulth

HaruOkumura: Uhm?

crossbonez: I THINK IM GOOD LMAO THX HARU

HaruOkumura: Oh youre welcome! Let us know how it goes!

crossbonez: yeah sure if i dont die first!

[ crossbonez has left the conversation. ]

[ SATURDAY, 02:41 AM ]

[ JokersWild sent you a message! ]

JokersWild: Hey

JokersWild: I know youre probably asleep because it’s like fuck o clock in the morning and why wouldn’t you be

JokersWild: But I cant sleep because I made myself some antianxiety coffee when I got home haha

JokersWild: (futaba calls it estresso but I can’t call it that because it’s so clever it makes me mad I didn’t think of it first)

JokersWild: but I had a really good time tonight

JokersWild: and you seemed kind of worried all night so I wanted you to know that

JokersWild: and idek if you were worried because of us(?) or if there was something else going on and now I just seem like kind of an asshole for assuming it was about me

JokersWild: but whether it was or it wasn’t I had fun

JokersWild: and

JokersWild: I’m really happy you asked me out

JokersWild: and just…… you don’t need advice from anyone on how to like

JokersWild: woo me yknow?

JokersWild: I had notifications turned off but the number of messages in the group chat kept ticking up so I lurked for a second

JokersWild: I don’t know what anyone ended up telling you but you didn’t need it

JokersWild: you don’t have to impress me. I ALREADY like you.

JokersWild: so, that’s that

JokersWild: this coffee is very strong and obviously my inhibitions are non existent right now so I’m going to bed before this turns into a confession

JokersWild: or more of one

JokersWild: lets, like, do this again? I want to keep doing this with you

[ JokersWild has left the conversation. ]

[ SATURDAY, 02:54 AM ]

[ JokersWild sent you a message! ]

JokersWild: also oh my god thank you for not freaking the fuck out when that condom fell out of my jacket I SWEAR TO YOU I did not put it there and when I find out who did I am going to unmake them

JokersWild: okay goodnight

[ JokersWild has left the conversation. ]

#pegoryuweek2018 #pegoryu #akiryu #fic: criminal mischief #fandom: persona 5 #fandom: persona #p5

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ztufs · 6 years ago

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10 Animations (and games) that made my life a little better

So for my first post I’d like to just share my appreciation for 10 animations I really felt a connection to, whether they were emotional, out of fascination or just pure amazement. I have no “rules” for what kind of animations they’re gonna be, aside from them being animated (Shocker I know).

So yeah, I hope yall enjoy this list, and leave a comment about some of the animations that left you with a smile on your face!

#1- Wall-e

I’m gonna start of this list with my favourite animated movie (or just movie in general): Wall-e. It’s no secret that Pixar makes great animations, and I know I’m not the only one who loves this movie. What really captures my attention is the feeling of soltitude and ambience shown throughout the first act of the movie, until Eve arrives. What I find great about this part is how much “show don’t tell” is used, to describe to us, the viewers, about the post-apocalyptic world.

Being that the main character almost never speaks, repeating alot of words or lines when he actually does, makes it super duper cool how the animators used visual storytelling to show us how the world has gone to shit, as well as Wall-e’s expressions and sounds to pinpoint exactly how he feels.

If you haven’t seen this movie, I highly reccomend it!

#2- Ori and the Blind Forest

For my second pick I chose one of my favourite games, name is in the title.For me, this game has everything: Awesome music, tight gameplay, a flubtastic story, and smooth animation. Playing this game really felt like going on a journey through a MAGICAL world, where anything could happen! Even though this game was the source of alot, and I mean ALOT, of ragequits, it still brought me back every time. The art in this game is fenomenal, and combined with the animation I really feel it when Ori, the game’s main character, flies through the world, up and down walls and through changing environments.

Also Managing those difficult jumps feels really satisfying!

#3- Death Parade

There are alot of animes out there (yes I’m a weeabo), but there’s a few that I’ve really enjoyed, Death parade is one of them. It’s opening might trick you to think you’re gonna watch a friendly, happy-go-lucky show about different people living in purgatory, but you couldn’t be more wrong. It’s dark themes and how it tackles different topics about human pshychology with a touch of humor and warmth really got to me. I felt a connection with the main character in a way I haven’t with any other characters in anime, and the realization about the main characters fate (no spoilers), really worked for me.

#4- Night in the Woods

I really love this game. I don’t know if it’s the overall great stylized aesthetics, the great, great music, the amount of clever, funny voicelines given to the characters, the characters themselves, showing multitudes of different personalities and charisma, the general story of the game, the oh-so-smooth animation or the underlying themes of friendship, anxiety and an existential crisis that grips me. I might have a clue though.

This game really delves into the greater questions about life in a really humorous and philosophical way, and i loved every step of the journey. It has really worked as an inspiration for me when it comes to creativity and life itself.

#5- Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse (trailer)

I’m just gonna throw this out here first to clearify: As of the date I wrote this list, the full movie wasn’t out, so I had just the trailer to go by.

Ok, I’m not gonna lie. The moment I saw the trailer for the spider-verse movie my mind. Was. Blown. The animation in this video is perfect. It’s the amazing mix between cycadelic cartoon meeting animation. The colors are vibrant, the animation is smooth as butter, and the textures really capture the comic-feel of everything. Along with me being a Spider-man fanboy I really love the whole concept of the spider-verse, and I can’t wait for this movie to come out

I hope Spider-pig is in it.

#6- Animator vs. Animation (the whole series)

If you watch alot of animations on youtube, you’re bound to come by one of these videos. Made by Alan Becker, Animator vs Animation is a series about an animator (You don’t say), who has to fight his own animated stickman. The genious about these videos is how it’s animated. The animator uses different tools in the animation program, as well as the computer and even phone, to really make it seem that he’s fighting with a virtual stickman. Getting better and better for each video, you can really see how different principles of animation are applied, to make for a really cool untraditional “stick-man fight”.

The series is pretty funny and shows you how creative and meta you can get with animation. Just don’t come to me if your pc is attacked by a small stickman.

#7- Angry Birds - Piggy Tales (The first two seasons)

NOW BEFORE YOU LEAVE THIS BLOG IN DISAPPOINTMENT AND ANGER, let me just say that there’s a special reason as to why I chose this, out of all things.

There was a period in my life where I was going through some rough things, and I spent a lot of time cooped up in the hospital. As I didn’t have a lot to do, phone games became my rescue, one of them being angry birds. I remember getting 3 stars on every stage (get on my level noobs), and having fun watching the different animations the creators of angrybirds made.

That being said, Piggy Tales is actually a funny short show, made on computer to resemble clay and stop-motion animation, making use of physical humor and slapstick. The animation is pretty smooth and funny, where different kinds of settings are explored each time.

Be aware though, as the third season shifts from clay-like animation to more refined animation. This might be off putting for those who found the clay-style appealing.

Piggy Tales are short but many, so if you wanna kill some time, this might be a good time-assassin.

#8- When Marnie was there

I had to include a Ghibli film here, I mean come on! Which one was the question though, but I was kinda allready set on one in particular. “When Marnie was there” is my favourite Ghibli film. I feel like it really connected with the movie in a weird beautiful way. The themes I saw and experienced throughout the movie, might not have been the same as the ones the writers and producers saw. opr me though, I felt like the movie really showed what it can feel like to be alone. Along with beautiful music and composition of scenery, the movie really grabbed me from the get-go and didn’t release me until the credits started rolling. What I was left with was a feeling of solitude, but at the same time I felt grateful for having friends and family, and for being part of this journey we call life.

Conclusion: Anime makes you feel feelings.

#9- Sly Cooper (trailer)

As with the Spider-verse, this is only a trailer, since the movie has been either cancelled or suspended for a long time.

The Sly Cooper games were the first games I ever played on a home console, so they have a big place in my nerd-soul. So when a movie was announced, I was well on my way to the cinnemas, even before the trailer was released. When I saw the trailer though, I was overwhelmed with just pure good-feels. The character-designs had changed to give them a more natural look, but it worked really well in my opinion.

As for the dialogue, the voiceactors were the same as the ones I grew up with, aside from the main character, Sly, but I let that slide since the new voice actor, Ian James Corlett pulled off Sly’s charcter pretty good! The animation of him jumping, sliding and running through the city also matched the way it felt playing the game, and doing those exact same actions.

If the movie ever comes out, I’ll be the first in line by any sacrifice necessary.

#10- Pooh’s Grand Adventure: The Search for Christopher Robin

To finish of this list I thought I’d share a piece of nostalgia! Though It’s been a long time since I last saw it, this movie was a big part of my childhood! Now don’t make fun of me for choosing a kids movie for this list, I still think this movie has a great story and music, along with the animation and background-paintings. Besides, making fun of me makes me sad, and I’m a big boy so I’m not supposed to cry.

This movie really excels at showing how vivid our imagination can be. Every scary location in the movie is shown at the end to be a reimagined version of reality, emphasizing just how much a kids imagination changes the world around them.

So yeah! Thanks for reading through my list of 10 animated things that really made for the raisin in the sausage (It’s a norwegian saying so don’t feel confused).

I don’t know what this list says about me as a person, but it is what it is. I also hope you found some of the stuff on this list intriguing, and that you might wanna check it out.

Welp, that’s it for me!

Ztufs out!

#ztufs #animation #top 10 #top10 #top ten #topten #animator #disney #anime #cartoon #marvel #games #videogames

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terrible-tentacle-theatre · 7 years ago

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The Bestiary Revamped: Vampire Squid (HALLOWEEN SPECIAL)

Disclaimer: While this article is founded in scientific fact, it contains hyberbole and conscious exaggerations for the sake of comedy. Do not take my ramblings at face value. You can find the sources at the end of the article and tools for scientific fact-checking under the “Learn more” link on my blog.

The old article can be read here.

(I intended to post this yesterday but stuff came up. Anyway.)

Ahem.

Cue the spooky music.

*threatening organ music plays at unbearable volumes*

That’s right, dear readers, the Spooky Gourd Day has finally, finally come, and with it the nigh-endless Halloween shitposting that permeates this website every October like the smell of pumpkin pie did my house just a few hours ago, immediately before I ate most of it. (I still have like half of it left, but it’s cold now so it doesn’t have that mouthwatering smell unless I reheat it. And I was too busy watching old Betty Boop Halloween cartoons to reheat it. Anyway, I’m getting off track.)

Frankly, the obsession of internet culture with this innocuous holiday has always fascinated me. What it is about a day when you get to dress up all funky-like, go from house to house acting like an idiot, horf down all the candy you can get away with and watch scary movies all night that is so attractive to them youngsters? I simply cannot wrap my head around it.

However, it is a day of great significance to this blog, since this is the day when we celebrate the utter freakiest of the freakiest that can be pulled up from the stygian waves of the planet’s oceans. This is the third Halloween of the Terrible Tentacle Theatre, and for this notable occasion, I have decided to give one of my earliest poster children a much-needed revisit.

Back in the early days of the blog, when it was still called Hectocotylus and my content mainly consisted of spicing up Wikipedia and Cracked articles with swearing for the sick enjoyment of some 30 followers, the article in question was my first big hit among the people of the Digital Blue Hills of Hell. In the days when most of my articles didn’t go above 20 notes, this beast gathered up 300 notes by using its nebulous tendrils to reach into the deepest corners of the ole ‘web. Not only was this creature my first big hit in my career as a marine biology blogger with tone moderation issues, it would also fit in great as the main monster in a theoretical Universal Horror/Syfy teamup, which would be the Halloweeniest shit ever.

Ladies, gentlemen and other fellows, the vampire squid.

Before you even see this thing in full detail you can already gather that I didn’t choose it for this year’s Halloween special for nothing. Everything from the ghoulish dark red color scheme to the bat-like webbing between eldritch tentacles screams “cheesy Hammer Horror movies written by good ol’ Howard Philips”. And it will become even more evident when you see it in its full, glowy, betentacled glory.

This is how it looks like when you stare down a squishy, floppy incarnation of doom. This thing looked so freaky that the dude who discovered it, a certain German biologist called Karl Chun, decided to name it Vampyroteuthis infernalis. That’s Latin for “vampire squid from Hell”. Yep, that’s right. Remember the part where science is hard fact unaffected by emotion? Well you can throw that right out the window, because this fucker freaked its discoverer out so hard that he named it the vampire squid from Hell.

“The shit I’ve seen, kiddo. You wouldn’t believe.”

Even descriptions of this guy sound like they escaped straight from a 19th century gothic horror novel. For example, in 1925 the Arcturus expedition caught one near the Galapagos Islands and described it as “a very small but very terrible octopus, black as night, with ivory white jaws and blood-red eyes.” Even in the years of the Roaring Twenties, merely seeing the vampire squid was enough to bring out anyone’s inner Poe or Bram Stoker, apparently, which isn’t very surprising considering that it looks like Béla Lugosi had an illicit affair with one of the Star-Spawn of Cthulhu.

You’re welcome for that mental image.

While calling it a vampire is more than appropriate, the names “squid” or “octopus” are much less fitting. While intially appearing to be something of an octopus, it’s actually not one of them; and it isn’t a squid either, which left the confused scientists to place it within its own little private taxon, the order Vampyromorphida. If you know a little bit of Latin, that means “vampire-shaped”, which would imply that this is the general shape for vampires. So next time you read Twilight, imagine Edward as a vampire squid flopping around on the ground the entire time and I guarantee you’ll have a blast reading through several hundred pages of sweaty bloodsucker romance.

Unlike Edward however, the vampire squid doesn’t actually feed on blood. Dashing from shadow to shadow in the cover of a snappy opera cape and hunting for innocent young maidens in the night is the kind of energy expenditure that this malevolent mollusk cannot afford. Mainly because it lives (you guessed it) in the darkest, deepest excesses of the oceans, where the eternal darkness creates an all-year-round Halloween mood. In these waters, even beginners have a hard time finding the tiniest scraps of food, and have to resort to drastic measures to get by. But the vampire squid looks at those beginners and goes “yall are scrubs git gud lmao”. Compared to the vampire squid’s lifestyle, virtually any other denizen of the deep sea lives right in the middle of a goddamn cornucopia.

See, the vampire squid doesn’t just live in the deep ocean. It specifically prefers places called Oxygen Minimum Zones (OMZ), which sounds more like the hardest Sonic level ever than any serious place which can support life. OMZs are vast sheet-like expanses of water in the deep sea which barely contain any breathable oxygen. Some of these zones can contain as little as 5% of the oxygen that saturates air, and barely anything survives here.

And guess what? The vampire squid lives here. Not only lives, but thrives.

This is the game the vampire squid plays, every day of its life. On hard difficulty.

Obviously, living in a dead wasteland of suffocating water has required the squid to adopt some nifty tools of survival. Do not do so would be like entering the final dungeon of a video game with early game gear.

First off is a pair of sensory filaments, which the vampire squid extends through the water much like a spider does its web. They are super long and flexible, and probably the source of so many dick jokes that the squid will choke a bitch if anyone tells one more.

“No, I’ve never heard that one ever. Ha ha ha. Real fuckin’ original.”

Next up is a pair of membranous wings, used by the squid to travel through the aether of space to “fly” through the water, it’s cape-like arm web billowing behind it. The vampire parallels are getting more and more accurate.

Interestingly this wing isn’t the same in adults and juveniles. At one point in their devlopment they start growing a second pair of fins which eventually fully substitutes the first pair, which then atrophies back into the flesh. Thus if you’re lucky enough to catch a vampire squid, it’s not impossible that it will have four fins. The biologists who first found these four-finned squid nearly went insane trying to describe it (and several other developmental stages) as separate species. It was such a mess it took years to sort out, and nowadays the vampire squid is the sole surviving species of its order. He’s standing in the darkness. Alone.

WAKE ME UP INSIDE

The fins and the filaments aren’t just decorative elements the squid picked out at Hot Topic, either. Used in tandem, they’re a fearsomely effective netting tool and the way this crafty cephalopod earns its daily bread. You think spiders are cool with their webs? Nah, Spiders ain’t shit. They’re lazy idiots and their web does all the work for them. the vampire squid’s filaments is where it’s REALLY at.

See, the vampire squid’s main diet is thankfully not blood but something called “marine snow”. This is basically the shower of discarded tissue, shit and corpses that rains down upon the lower layers of the deep ocean from the upper layers all year round. Having this fall from the sky for “White Christmas” would probably be quite traumatizing.

DECK THE HALLS WITH BALLS OF FECES SHALALALALALALALALAAAAARGH

The vampire squid, however, has had its resolve steeled by years of isolation in the darkness of the deep ocean, and is willing to chug down anything to survive. Bear Grylls is a picky gourmet chef compared to this guy.

That said, it needs to eat something that’s actually of some nutritional worth. It could spend its life scarfing down every chunk of marine snow it comes across, but that would be a waste of muscle movements since most of it does exactly nil to fill up its stomach. That’s where the filaments/fins combo come in, turning the vampire squid into an angry little tripwire trap ready to snap at any moment.

Note the filament. That’s not a parasite, that’s legit a part of the animal. Nobody knows where it evolved from, it’s not a modified arm or tentacle and it’s a fucking enigma.

Mystery tentacles: the quintessential Terrible Tentacle Theatre experience.

Extending its filaments (one at a time) into the mucky waters around, it waits more still then I do when I go to the kitchen for a glass of water during the night and I hear a sudden noise. The filaments come with a plethora of sensitive nerve endings, ensuring that anything bigger than a flea’s asscheeks landing on them will elicit an immediate response from the squid. And if said asscheeks touch the filaments, responds the squid it does. Specifically, it exhibits a surprising burst of speed (considering it just drifts around all day and it is effectively the consistency of Jell-O), pulled entirely by its fins to perform an acrobatic fucking pirouette off the handle, whipping around in a loose loop and catching its own filament. Millions of dogs around the world enviously sigh in unison.

After this, the squid pulls off its prey from the filament using its arms, which generate a solid slime-like material. The collected chunks of edible whatnot are rolled into a ball of slime, and horfed down by the squid at once. You probably cannot tell but there’s a Michelin star underneath its mantle. “Slimeball à la Vampire Squid” is one gourmet-ass dish.

Molto bene!

Of course, all this fine dining makes the vampire squid itself tasty as all hell. You are what you eat, afterall. But in the deep sea, you do NOT want to be tasty, because everyone is hungry on top of being the most light-deficient gourmet motherfuckers on the planet. So naturally, our subject needs some sort of way to evade the raving food critics hunting him in the deep. And he has this way in the form of a very unlikely tool: bioluminescence.

“But Admin”, I hear you say, “didn’t you just get done telling us last week that glowing in the deep sea will attract everything around you?” That I did, young padawan, and it still stands. However, just like last week’s subject, the vampire squid uses its built-in glowsticks with a very express purpose and doesn’t just flash into the sunset willy-nilly. The glowy parts of this beast have very well-defined places and usages, exquisitely located and timed, just like a laugh track in a sitcom. Underneath its dark-red skin the vampire squid carries clusters of glowing photophores mainly on the tip of its arms as well as in two fake eye-spots on the top of its mantle, ready to flare up in a blue burst of light on demand. The fake eyes even come with their own built-in eyelids, opening and closing as Dracula Jr. sees fit.

Imagine you’re a predator and you see this glowing collection of random bullshit. Now figure out where to bite. Good fucking luck.

These lights are used with great care and consideration in order to troll the fuck out of anybody who is foolish enough to make an attempt on the vampire squid’s life. Upon attack, the squid whips its arms around with the lights on full luminosity, creating a confusing dance of light spots in the otherwise total darkness and messing up the predator’s perception. The false eyes only make things worse, finally creating the illusion that the vampire squid possesses unlimited godlike control over space and time, which may damn well be true.

Question: What way is this vampire squid going? Hint: It’s not facing toward you.

The appearance of the squid as a godlike psychic is surprisingly in line with the whole vampire angle, since Dracula has reknownedly had the ability to charm and hypnotize people. The effect is further accentuated by the squid’s eyes, proportionally the largest of any animal ever discovered. With a diameter a whopping one sixth of the animal’s whole body, this thing's oculars are like if you were walking around with eyes the size of your head. Each.

And for added effect, they glow and change color depending on which angle you’re looking at them from.

DISCO CTHULHU

And finally, if a spooky vampire-looking-ass dark red glowing octopus-squid-thing with hypnotic powers isn’t Halloweeny enough for you, the vampire squid has a final trick up its sleeve that catapults it right into the realm of body horror. This is suspected to be a defensive tactic but who the fuck knows, really. Deep sea creatures are enigmatic as shit, and they guard their secrets jealously.

Alright, I’ll quit beating around the bush and say it outright. Basically the final defensive measure of the vampire squid is turning itself inside out.

Yep.

Of all the stupid shit that Mother Nature could have come up with, she went and decided “alright, it just up and turns itself inside the fuck out. What are you gonna do about it?”

This behavior is known to science as “pineappling” or even more Halloweeny-ly “pumpkin posture” (no, seriously) and it involves the squid taking the webbing between its arms and turning it upside to shield its head and body from harm. Now folded comfortably into a spiky little footbal, the vampire squid knows itself free from harm. The webbings are thin enough for it to see through, but also don’t let its lights to shine around, so doing this effectively means the vampire squid switches into stealth mode. Plus it looks stylishly similar to Dracula popping the collar on his cape.

The vampire squid is every Monster Mash horror cliché come to life and smushed into a vaguely cephalopod shaped package for best user experience. When the stars are right and Cthulhu and his Star-Spawn emerge from the sunken city of R’lyeh to bring the world to ruin once more, these guys will be the first living things they encounter. And then they’ll fuck off back to their stupid city, mumbling things like “what the hell man, that’s plagiarism” and “that’s way too extra, even for us”. The apocalypse is postponed once again, thanks to the vampire squid’s vailant efforts of looking weird as fuck.

Happy Halloween, everybody! I was a day late due to the length of this article, but I hope you don’t mind. Until next Tuesday’s article, have a wonderful time with the aftermath of the day of cheesy horror and confectioneries.

Sources:

Encyclopedia of Life

Tree of Life Web Project

Animal Diversity Web

Ocean Biogeographic Information System (OBIS)

Ellis, Richard. “Introducing Vampyroteuthis infernalis, the vampire squid from Hell”. The Cephalopod Page. Dr. James B. Wood.

Seibel, Brad. “Vampyroteuthis infernalis, Deep-sea Vampire squid”. The Cephalopod Page. Dr. James B. Wood. Retrieved 3 July 2011.

Hoving, H. J. T.; Robison, B. H. (2012). “Vampire squid: Detritivores in the oxygen minimum zone”. Proceedings of the Royal Society B: Biological Sciences.

#bestiary #bestiary revamped #halloween #halloween special #cephalopod #deep sea creatures #bioluminescence #marine snow #vampire squid #spoopy #bela lugosi is spinning in his grave somewhere

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jssberry-la · 7 years ago

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My Very First Post...Sort Of

(I MADE SOME MAJOR EDITS TO THIS, JSYK - 10/4/17)

I actually don’t remember what the first thing I wrote in Japanese was...or Spanish too for that matter...

But I do remember writing my first introduction in Japanese and it was on Lang-8. ;D

ORIGINAL POST: 2/1/2017

Hello! My name is Jacqueline and I’m 28. I’m from the US and I currently learning Japanese and Spanish. I like food, art, music, writing/poetry and anime. I hope to make friends from across the world.

First of all...let’s talk about how I put I currently learning and not I’m currently learning... (0_0)

See guys, native speakers make mistakes too! *nervous laugh*

Anyway, fairly simply right? Except around this time I had no idea how to say most of these words, so I went and looked up each word in a dictionary (as I still do today when I don’t know how to say something) and plugged them in. This was the result:

PRE-CORRECTIONS:

こんにちは！ジャクリーンと申します。アメリカ人です。28歳。日本語と西語学びます。食べ物アトミユウージックポエトリーやアニメ好きです。友達が欲しい。

I specifically remember giving up on “friends from across the world.” I recall myself thinking, hopefully someone will teach me how to say it.

And guess what? THEY DID! :D

The corrections will be in bold. Some sentences may have more than one correction, so it may depend on context for which one is best to use (I’ll need yall’s help with that.)

POST WITH CORRECTIONS, LINE BY LINE:

こんにちは！ジャクリーンと申します。28歳。こんにちは！ジャクリーンと申します。28歳のアメリカ人です。

日本語と西語学びます。日本語とスペイン語を学んでいます。現在勉強しているのは、日本語とスペイン語です。

食べ物アトミユウージックポイトリーやアニメ好きです。食べ物、アート、ミュウジック、詩やアニメが好きです。好きなものは、食べ物、アート、音楽、詩を書くこと、アニメなどです。

友達が欲しい。世界中に友達を作りたいと願っています。

I’ll include the hiragana for those of you who don’t know a lot of kanji just yet:

THE BREAKDOWN

と申します「ともうします」

This is a polite way of saying “I am (name).”

28歳のアメリカ人「にじゅうはっさいのアメリカじん」

“28 year old American.” The の particle combines these two to make them one noun.

〜歳「さい」is the counter used for ages. I learned that it’s always used for official documents, and there’s a more simplified one as well 才「さい」but it should never be used in official documents. Personally I like the first one. It looks fancy-smancy. ;D

日本語とスペイン語を学んでいます。(OR) 現在勉強しているのは、日本語とスペイン語です。

This is a nice chunk, so let’s look at it in pieces. We’ll start with the first one: 日本語とスペイン語を「にほんごとスペインごを」

Japanese and Spanish (languages). In the pre-corrected post, I used the kanji 西語「せいご」for Spanish, but I learned that the katakana word for Spain + language kanji is more common.

The を particle is the object particle. It ties everything together and carries the action to the object (or objects in this case.) You can learn more about it’s function on Tae Kim’s site or you can watch a video by Japanese Ammo. (I’ll edit this again if I find some more resources that I think are helpful.)

学んで��ます「まなんでいます」

学んでいます is the ます present continuous form of the verb: 学ぶ「まなぶ」- to study, learn. So all together it means, “am studying Japanese and Spanish (right now.)”

This can also be used for what we call the present perfect in English, so depending on the context it can also mean, “have (or has) been studying”.

現在勉強しているのは、「げんざいべんきょうしているのは」

So...yeah. Roughly, it means, “Currently (or now) studying...” I’m still trying to get the hang of this construction, but basically when you see の or こと after a verb, it nominalizes it (fancy way of saying: turns the verb into a noun.) I just found something explaining how it works on a site called “Wasabi” and it cleared up some confusion I had.

But the problem is this. I’m stuck on the しているの part. 勉強 by itself is a noun for “study.” It can be combined with する however to mean “to study.” So if we stick a の on that thing, it becomes “study(ing)” in noun form: 勉強するのは楽しくないです。Studying is not fun.

Remember what I said about the present continuous? The same thing applies to 勉強している “am studying/have been studying”. So I haven’t quite understood how it becomes a noun...unless this was an error on the native speaker’s part (which I don’t think it is) I’ve got some more studying to do. For now, は is referred to as the topic particle--what is being discussed or talked about and translates as, “As for...” “Speaking of...”

Therefore knowing that, it kinda makes sense if you translate it as, “Now as for what I’m studying (right now)” or “Now as for what I’ve been studying,”

You may also have noticed that we have two verbs that mean “to study.” There is a difference on how they’re used though. You can watch Japanese Ammo’s video here. I think Misa does a good job of explaining this.

好きなものは、食べ物、アート、音楽、詩を書くこと、アニメなどです。

We’re only going to look at the second correction because I feel it’s more accurate to what I was trying to say at that time.

好きなものは、｢すきなものは」

The word for like in Japanese is 好き, and unlike in English, it is an ADJECTIVE not a VERB. In fact, it’s specifically called a な adjective, and when it comes before a noun, a な comes between the な adjective and the noun.

もの means “thing.” So altogether it literally means, “Things I like” or “Likable things” if that helps you any.

食べ物、アート、音楽、詩を書くこと、アニメ｢たべもの、アート、おんがく、しをかくこと、アニメ｣

All of the following are a list of things that I like. Normally, there wouldn’t be any spaces (they’re not used in Japanese) and commas are mainly used to break up clauses--from what I’ve gathered thus far. Still an absolute beginner here. I think in this commas are breaking everything up (#BTW when typing commas in Japanese, the keyboard automatically puts a space.)

Anyway, here’s what they all mean:

食べ物 Food

アート Art

音楽 Music

詩を書くこと Writing poetry

アニメ Anime

などです。

です is used as a copular verb or linking verb (am, is, etc.) and it adds politeness to sentences. Take that example sentence I wrote earlier: 勉強するのは楽しくないです If I were leave the です off, it’d still mean the same thing, but it’s more casual and should only be said to your friends. A stranger, teacher or someone older or of higher status--definitely need the です. Otherwise you’ll sound quite rude.

です always goes at the end, but it’s never added if the sentence already ends in a verb:

本を読みました。｢ほんをよみました」 (Past tense) Read a/the book.

毎日映画を見る。｢まいにちえいがをみる」 (Informal) Watch movie(s) every day

リンゴを食べますか。｢リンゴをたべますか」 Eat apples?

など is defined in the dictionary as “etc.” It has some other uses, but right now IN THIS SENTENCE, it means “etc.”

So the sentence in its entirety: “I like food, art, music, writing poetry, anime, etc.”

世界中に友達を「せかいじゅうにともだちを」

世界中 - around/throughout the world, 友達 - friend(s). The に particle also has a few different uses, but in this case it signifies location. In English we would say, “Friends from around the world” or “Friends throughout the world.”

作りたい願っています「つくりたいねがっています」

These comes from the verb 作る「つくる」- to make or produce and 願う「ねがう」- to desire, request. For the first verb, you take the stem from what’s called the ます form (作り,) attach たい (want to...) to the end, and it becomes “want to make”

As for 願っています, you may recognize it from the word お願いします.

By placing it at the end of 作りたい, it’s making a polite request (or politely stating the desire) to make friends with people all around the world.

At least that’s my best guess here. 願う is also used in the expression: よろしくお願いします. It’s actually quite hard to translate in English, but it’s typically used when making a request as has been said to mean, “Please treat me nicely” or “I look forward to working with you,” or “Together, let’s do our best.” It’s often used in 自己紹介「じこしょうかい」- self introduction(s).

EX: 初めまして。サームです。18歳のアメリカ人です。よろしくお願いします！ Hello, I’m Sam. I’m 18 years old and American (or I’m an 18 year old American.)

Notice I didn’t translate the final part. That’s because it could be anything, “Let’s work together.” “Let’s do our best!” “I hope to work with you all,” “I hope we can help each other...” etc. etc.

And in case you didn’t notice, yes--being polite is VERY important in Japanese. Some people insist on learning the casual conjugations for verbs because there are more forms and rules to remember, so why not get it out of the way? However, the casual form is only, only, ONLY, ONLY used with friends. Using it with strangers makes you sound very rude.

Imagine a random person coming up to you and speaking to you like they’ve known you your whole life, touching on you--joking with you in a manner that would be cool...if you were one of their friends...but you’re not. So as a result they come off as disrespectful. Don’t be that person. Learn the formal way, then the casual, and practice conjugating both.

YEESH...that was A LOT...

I still have to post my Spanish corrections, too... (-_-,)

Tomorrow it is.

読んでありがとうございます。またね！

#japanese #langblr #language #language learning #TheStruggle

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mochimim · 7 years ago

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Spotlight

Genre: Fluff, ANGST, Celebrity! AU

Word count: 7.7k (my longest oneshot ever !!)

Pairing: Jimin x reader

Summary: The perfect guy, the imperfect celebrity

Warnings: Triggering topics - panic attack, thoughts of suicide

A/N: HELLO GUYS IM BACK WITH MY FIRST FIC IN QUITE A WHILE im so sorry tumblr deleted the post before this i haTE but it’s back so whooo !! this story is actually somewhat based on a personal experience, so I included a lot of personal thoughts and insights to try to make this better HAHAHAH but i hope yall like it !! i put in a lot of effort trying to write this fic and many BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS were shed but im finally done !! i really hold this story v close to myself because i actually felt all these things and i was a little delusional like the y/n in this fic !! please tell me how it was by dropping an ask into my inbox, both compliments and constructive criticism is good !! anyway besides this fic, im not yet done with dead leaves soRRY but feel free to leave me a request for the ending of chapter 7 (2nd last chapter !!) so drop me that asK ANYWAY IM RAMBLING AGAIN I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS FIC BYEEEEEE

"Miss, your interview is in less than 5 hours, are you sure that you want to be seen on national television with dog fur all over yourself?" Seulgi wrinkled her nose at me in disgust.

"Shut up Seulgi, I still have so much time," I flopped on my bed with my puppy on my chest. "And don't call me 'miss', I'm your younger sister. Don't be weird."

"You are the one who needs to shut up." She scoffed at me, but quickly started giggling and I joined in as well.

"No, but really, your stylist is waiting for you. What's his again? The cute one? Seok-min?" I let a small chuckle escape from my lips at her confusion.

"Seokjin," I got up and placed my puppy on the ground. "And take him. He's all yours." I cackled before sprinting out of my room, listening to her frustrated and embarrassed protests in glee.

"I will bet my entire career that you and Seulgi will get together by the end of this year." I mumbled to Seokjin as he handed me my outfit. He made a weird noise, probably thinking about the possibility.

"Yeah sure, I can hook it up." He said nonchalantly. I choked on my breath in utter horror and shock, I didn't think he would take me so seriously.

"Why are you making me wear something so pretty today?" I asked him as I got changed behind a curtain.

"What do you mean by 'pretty'? You look pretty every day." He said matter-of-factly, and I couldn't help but blush a little at his words.

"I'm not used to this. I can't rock dresses, full stop. I only look decent in a shirt and shorts." I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror one last time before walking out to sit down in the makeup chair. "Where am I going later, anyway?"

"You're an Academy Award winner, a Grammy winner, and you still don't know where you're going after this. Unbelievable." He called the makeup girl over and crossed his arms. I furrowed my brows, wondering how he linked the three things together.

"You're going on national television, stupid. You're going to be interviewed by Park Jimin!" He exclaimed and threw his hands into the air, almost hitting the makeup girl in the face.

"Who?"

He gave a little gasp at my obliviousness. "Do you not watch the evening news? He's the presenter after that. He does all the celebrity news, he interviews them on radio as well. He's like Korea's very own Ryan Seacrest! Only more beautiful and younger, and did I mention beautiful?"

"Uh, so, does this give me a reason to re-dye my hair?" I murmured as the makeup girl put some bright red lipstick on me, not really caring about whoever Park Jimin was.

"You've already done your makeup, silly. You wouldn't want to ruin her masterpiece, would you?" He said, posing more of a statement than a question. "Thank you Irene." He tapped her on her back as she scuttled away in fear.

"I don't think her name is Irene," I squinted my eyes at my reflection in the mirror.

"Whatever, you're almost ready. Time for hair, time for me to do my magic." He whipped a comb out of the pocket of his pants. "We have no time for re-dying of hair. And I think that this pink hair suits you. Also, don't worry about the interview with Park Jimin later. It will be a walk in the ‘Park’!" I groaned at his very lame joke and he chuckled softly.

I tugged at the hem of my dress, trying to pull it lower.

"Seulgi, why do you look so nervous? I'm the one going out there." I asked her as she bit her neatly manicured nails.

"Look, I'm just worried for you, don't mess this up for m- for yourself, okay? Also, I'm going to be in the same room as Pa-"

Heads were turned as a man walked into the room. He looked confident and cool. He was very handsome, with a charm that seemed to go around the room. His cotton candy coloured hair looked like it took hours to style, his makeup flawless. He wore a suit that looked a little too tight, but it accentuated his muscular arms, so I wasn't complaining.

"Park Jimin-"

Stop being so shallow, maybe he's a dick.

And suddenly, I was being pushed into the set. And right into Park Jimin's arms.

"Cut!"

I heard someone yell, and I swear I heard the entire studio sigh in unison. I didn't realise that I was in the Park Jimin's arms until he pulled me up, and I dusted off my dress.

"Sorry." I bowed to him and ran off to the standby area.

"Could we do that walk in part again? Come in less violently, thanks." The mysterious voice ordered me, and I nodded at the instructions.

After coming out less violently, the rest of the interview went fairly well. I didn’t mention any embarrassing things that could expose me, but I did comment on our similar hair colours, which was enough awkward for one day.

“Hey, we have the same hair!” I blurted out just before he could ask me a question. He tilted his head and was silent for a moment, but quickly caught on and smiled at me. I stretched my hand out for a high-five, hoping that he wouldn’t leave me hanging, and he didn’t. He flashed me the brightest smile I’ve seen in a while and gave me a high-five.

“He has the most gorgeous smile. His eyes smile along with him, did you know? He literally radiated happiness, Seulgi! I can’t believe it!” I exclaimed to my sister as we were leaving the venue, but quickly stopped myself from getting too hysterical over someone I just met.

“He really is a charmer. I got the chills just standing next to him.” Seulgi smiled to herself, quite pleased that she was able to stand next to him, and then I realised all the hype over him. I was going to start watching the celebrity news show from now on. I was going to b-

“Wait!”

I felt someone tap on my back and I turned around.

To be face to face with Park Jimin.

My bodyguard was going to push him away when I stopped him. Jimin looked out-of-breath.

“S-sorry for disturbing y-you. But, w-would you like to g-go out for lunch tomorrow? For w-work purposes, of course.” He asked as he caught his breath. I looked at his panting form, and my heart doubled in size.

Stop thinking of those things.

“YES!” I yelled, startling both him and Seulgi, making them jump a little.

“But miss, tomorrow you have t-”

“Cancel it!” I beamed at the glowing boy in front of me while trying to wave away my sister.

“Uh, we can go another time if you’re bu-” He blushed a little, scratching the back of his head. My eyes widened and I immediately waved my hands frantically.

“No, no! It’s okay, tomorrow is fine. I’m sure it isn’t important.” I smiled at him again, and he reciprocated the happiness.

“Okay! Could I get your number?” He handed me his phone and I willingly took it from him, not minding that it had a bright pink phone case. I punched my numbers in and handed it back to him eagerly.

“Thanks! I’ll text you later. See you tomorrow!” He bowed to me and walked back into the studio. By then, I felt like I was going to explode.

“You know, you’re supposed to meet your father tomorrow. Are you sure you want to cancel?” Seulgi asked me cautiously. I stopped in my tracks, thinking of him.

Did l really have to choose between my father and Park Jimin?

“Cancel the lunch appointment.” I sighed after a long time of just standing there. My sister made a sound of disapproval, but I ignored her and walked back to the car.

Park Jimin.

I went to Google him when I got home.

Actor, Presenter, Singer, Dancer

He seems really cool.

His fans love him because of his bubbly personality and kind words.

Seems legit.

Was in a band called BTS and was internationally known. However, the band disbanded due to unknown reasons. Whether the members are still close is still unknown.

He was in a band? That’s so hot.

Are you sure you want to read Park Jimin fanfic?

I’ve never been more sure in my life.

But, before I could click “yes”, my phone buzzed in my pocket. My gasped and snatched the phone out a little too excitedly to be greeted with Jimin’s text message.

Jimin: hello! This is y/n right? It’s Park Jimin. Are you able to meet at the dog cafe in Gangnam tomorrow at 1? xx

I am literally going to cry.

“Yes!” I screamed at my phone and threw it onto my bed. I pumped my fists into the air in joy and threw myself onto my bed as well. “He texted me!”

The next hour was just me doing some intensive research on Jimin for ‘work purposes’, or at least that’s what I told my sister, until I realised that he didn’t text me back. I picked my phone off the bed and read the message again. And then, it dawned on me.

I was the one who didn’t text him back.

I cried out in horror and quickly typed out a short message to reply him and not seem rude.

Me: hello Jimin! Yep tmr at 1 is gud HAHAHAHA c u !!!!

Too informal?

Me: hello Jimin. Tomorrow at 1pm at the dog cafe will be splendid. Thank you for your time.

Too formal?

Me: hello Jimin! Yeah tomorrow at 1 will be good! Thanks and see you there!

I guess that will do.

And I pressed send, waiting for him to reply like I expected him to send me a message at the exact same moment I sent him one.

[read at 6:45pm]

Oh, okay then. I’ll see him tomorrow anyway.

And I spent the rest of my evening thinking about him.

“So, is my dear y/n going on a date now?” Seokjin teased me as I looked for a dress.

“I think you’re a little too nosy today. Why are you peeking into my personal life? And I’m hanging out with a friend.” I shook my head. “Do you have an outfit for me to wear today? His- I mean their favourite colour is blue, so I want to wear blue.”

“So, you just diss me, and expect me to help you to impress some trick shot guy that might break your heart?” He crossed his arms.

“Ugh, okay then. There isn’t any, so I’m just gonna take this weird purple dress.” I sighed, in hopes of winning him over using reverse psychology.

“There are jeans in the bottom right drawer. And there are nice shirts somewhere in the top shelf I think.” Seokjin whispered to me, as if he didn’t want to get caught trying to help me. I giggled at him and went to search for the clothes. I picked out a simple white shirt and ripped jeans.

“Thank you, and sorry for the trouble.” I did a half-bow to him, actually relieved that he was here to help me. A small smile danced on his lips and I took it as a “you’re welcome” and walked out to get changed.

“Jimin! Hello!” I exclaimed as I got out of the car and saw him standing outside the cafe. He looked stunning as hell, with a long sleeved white sweater and black jeans that hugged his legs that were much prettier than my own, completed with a green beanie on his head.

“Oh, hello y/n. Are you ready to go in?” He flashed me his signature smile, and I was at a loss for words yet again. All I could muster was a slight nod, and he took my hand and led me into the cafe.

Park. Jimin. Is. Holding. My. Hand.

As we entered the place, we were greeted by at least a million puppies, nipping and yapping at our feet. Or at least I was. The dogs didn’t go near Jimin, strangely enough. I squealed at the cute puppies and picked some up to cuddle. Jimin tried picking one up, but it kind of growled at him, so he playfully growled back at it, making me giggle.

Many people in the cafe stared at Jimin and I, and I wasn’t sure whether it was because of Jimin’s good looks, his fame, my actor status or the fact that we were together. BUt it didn’t really bother me, I was just happy that I was with him at that moment.

With a puppy snoring on my lap and Jimin holding my hand in his, it was bliss.

“This one’s name is Bubbles, Jimin. He’s super cute, look at his face!” I whispered to him, afraid to wake the sleeping pup. He nodded fondly and peered at the dog’s face.

“He actually looks like my friend’s dog. I like him.” He nodded in approval and I smiled at him.

“I wonder why the puppies aren’t coming to you. Maybe I should trust them.” I jokingly said with a small wink. He chuckled at my teasing words and picked a dog up.

“What secret do you know about me? Huh?” He lowered his voice, trying to seem manly. But, the dog squirmed in his hands, so he put it down and it scuttled away.

“So, you’re an actress right? I’ve seen you in some dramas. You’re really good.” He murmured to me, and I swear I’ve never blushed so hard.

“Uh, i’m not very good. I just get casted in things for publicity, I guess.” I looked away from him in shame, not really wanting to talk about my career. “But how about you, Mr. actor-slash-singer-slash-presenter-slash-dancer? You’re multi-talented. That’s really cool.”

“I’m not that talented, come on. You’re-” he laughed at me, but was interrupted by a girl tapping on his shoulder. The girl looked about 15, with plaited hair and braces, and she held a notebook with Jimin’s face on it.

“Oppa-ya, could you sign this for me please?” She tilted her head to the side, making me want to laugh at her cute attempt of winning him over. He stared at the girl for a little while, and then magically whipped a pen out of thin air and signed her book. The girl was obviously really happy, as she squealed with joy when he handed the book back to her, and she went away skipping.

“I think that we should leave here and we can go to my house to chill out. It’s about a five minute walk from here. What do you say?” He suggested, and I willingly nodded, reluctantly carrying the sleeping puppy on my lap to his bed, and we left.

“Today’s weather is really nice, don’t you think?” I said it mostly to myself, but he hummed in response. I felt his hand brush against mine, and I laced my fingers in his. My cheeks were burning, but I could blame that on the weather.

And there we were, walking down Gangnam Street, ignoring all the surprised netizens and flashing of cameras. His expression looked a little strained, and I felt like mine was too, but when I looked at him all my worries melted away like ice cream on a hot summer day. He looked so beautiful in the bright sunlight, contrary to the sharp wind that tangled my hair and made me look like I was going very red.

We walked all the way until we reached a very tall, very modern building, and into a lift that took us to the penthouse. Once I stepped into his apartment, my mouth hung open. I couldn’t think straight looking at all that expensive looking furniture, and the five other beautiful men sitting on a couch that looked like it was bought with all the money I had earned.

“Ah, there they are! I’d like to meet my friends.” He squeezed my hand, and I had never been more glad that his seater covered his hands, because my hands were sweating.

It’s only been one date, and he’s introducing his friends to me now? This is going a little too fast, but I shouldn’t say anything.

“Guys, this is y/n. Remember her from that drama Temptation? Yeah, she was playing the young Park Jiwoo.” He asked the five men, and all of them sat up and nodded their heads.

“Y/n, the one in blue is Namjoon-hyung, the one in black is Yoongi-hyung, the one in green is Hoseok-hyung, the one in white is Jungkook and the other one in black is Taehyung.” He introduced, and I gave a polite bow to all of them. They all nodded to me, besides Taehyung and Jungkook who gave me an enthusiastic “hello!” each.

“I’m so sorry, I actually have to leave for a little bit, I have to settle some stuff with the producer of my evening show. I’ll only be gone for two hours at most. Would you like to stay here, or do you want me to take you home right now?” He said, not looking up from his phone.

“Um, I think I can stay here and wait for you,” I beamed at him, and he looked up at me and beamed back.

“Great! Guys, please treat her well and don’t scare her away.” He turned on his heels and came dangerously close to my face. “I’ll see you in a bit, okay?” He whispered to me, and his lips brushed my cheek. I felt a tingle run down my spine and I nodded furiously. And he smirked and left.

I stood awkwardly at the entrance of the apartment, facing the five guys. They gave me a small nod, and gestured for me to sit with them. I gulped and moved my wooden legs to sit on the comfiest couch i’ve ever sat on.

“So, y/n, how old are you? Are you a 95 liner like Jiminie?” The one in blue asked me. Namjoon, was it?

“Uh, I-i’m a 95 liner, yeah.” I stuttered, trying to hide my increasing nerves.

“Don’t be nervous, we don’t bite,” Hoseok chuckled, and I felt the need to smile along.

“So, are you and hyung going to get married? I like you, you seem really nice!” Jungkook blurted out, earning him a light smack on his arm by one of his hyungs.

“Um,” I coughed, expressing my nervousness. “We’ve only been on one date, so I don’t so as of now.”

“I think you guys are making her nervous, you guys should go now.” Yoongi told the rest in a monotonous voice. They all grumbled, but did as he said, and I said my silent thanks to Yoongi for helping me. He stayed on the couch, though, but I didn’t really mind.

“I’m Yoongi, if you forgot.” I nodded at him, confident that his name was the easiest to remember. “You don’t need to call me Oppa, if that was what you were thinking.” He clarified, and even though I wasn’t thinking about that, I nodded along.

After that awkward first words, we started talking. About our likes, dislikes, favourite things and least favourite things. He was surprisingly easy to talk to, and surprisingly relatable as well. We had many things in common, and we mostly talked about music. He liked rap and hip hop, so did I. I even let him listen to some of my songs that I had recorded for fun, and he gave me a stamp of approval.

“Wow, should I be honoured that THE Min Yoongi gave me a thumbs up on my joke song?” I giggled, and he flashed me a gummy smile that I never thought that I would ever see.

“Yes, yes you should.”

But, before I could show Yoongi my other joke song, Jimin came in from the lift and sat beside me.

“You seem really comfortable here, that’s a good sign. Would you like to stay for dinner? I think Jungkook is cooking glazed sweet potatoes, and it’s really an interesting experience to eat that.” He asked me, looking at me with those gorgeous eyes and I immediately nodded without thinking.

“Great, I’ll be in the kitchen for a bit. I’ll be back.” His hand lingered on my arm a little too long, and I felt my blush creeping up to my cheeks again. Yoongi had also gotten up to go to the bathroom, so I was alone in the living room.

I took my phone out to check the time, when I saw the twenty-one missed calls and fifteen messages Seulgi had sent me. I sighed and rubbed my temples, worrying that Seulgi was going to overworry. I called her back and held my breath, preparing myself for a big scolding from her. She was working for me, but I was still her younger sister.

“Unnie?” I whispered into the phone, and I heard her cry out in frustration.

“First, you don’t answer my calls, and now you’re suddenly calling me unnie? I was so worried for you! You just ignored my calls, and I had to do everything myself! Where are you right now? I’ll send someone to pick you up.”

“Seulgi, please. I’m fine. I’m at Jimin’s house, it’s fine! But, can I stay for dinner? Please, they asked and I already said yes.” I pleaded into the phone, not caring that Jimin had entered the room and sat on the space next to me.

“You have so much to do tonight, what are you doing being at his house for so long? You have to send emails to-”

“Yay, thanks Seulgi! I love you very much! I’ll be home before ten and I’ll have plenty of time to finish up my work thank you! See you, I love you!” I dragged out my last word before hanging up on her and exhaling very loudly. Jimin pet my head, and I instinctively leaned towards him and lay my head on his shoulder.

“Ewww~ You guys have only been on one date, and you’re already so lovey-dovey.” Jungkook came into the room wearing an apron that said “kiss the kook” and a very disgusted expression. I was going to comment on the younger’s cute words, but Jimin beat me to it.

“Date? What date?”

I felt my heart break into two.

He said it with such confusion, that I couldn’t tell whether he was joking or not.

Jungkook’s eyes widened, making him look more like a child. He blinked at us awkwardly for a moment, but quickly came to his senses. “Dinner is ready, y’all can come now.”

Jimin got up and pulled me to my feet, and we made our way to the dining room together, but I suddenly lost all appetite.

He didn’t see today as a date? Then what did he think it was?

But, I pushed all my negative thoughts aside to be replaced by the glorious food in front of me. Not only could he ‘kook’, he could also cook.

We spent dinner talking about everything we could think of, and trying to pry the sweet potatoes off the plate. It was Jungkook’s special dish when everyone was sad or during a happy occasion, they told me, and I smiled at them.

After that day, Jimin and I became closer and closer. I ignored his words that hurt me before, and I tried to move on.

Maybe he just was trying to protect his dignity.

He texted a lot, and we called and video called a lot as well. We talked about everything, from good things to bad things, but we were never at a lost for words. We never got bored while talking, nor did we run out of things to say. Conversation flowed really well, and sometimes I felt myself wondering why I had ever doubted him for being a dick.

I talked a lot to Yoongi, as well. He was someone I could talk to comfortably without it getting too awkward. Our similar taste in music usually took the wheel in our conversations, we recommended music to each other and that strengthened our friendship.

Jimin and I went on a few more ‘dates’, or whatever he thought they were. We went out to eat, I went to his house to watch a romantic movie, we went shopping together, and many more things that I really cherished.

There were too many news articles about us to ignore, but Jimin didn’t seem to be bothered.

“It’s going to die out soon if we don’t address it, it’ll be okay.” He flashed that award-winning eye smile again, winning me over in a snap of a finger.

The news articles didn’t bother me, though. It was the number of news articles surrounded around our “pending relationship”. All of them said the same thing, all talking about how people saw us around together, holding hands and asking if the fans thought we would be a good couple or not. Most of the comments said we would be the cutest celebrity couple, and I didn’t deny them.

We were busy, I had a new drama that I was working on and he had his presenting career, but we made it work. We carved out time in between shoots to see each other, and even if we couldn’t see each other in person, we would call or text.

And every day, I fell more and more in love with him.

I couldn’t help it, it just happened. It hit me one day out of the blue. I didn’t just like him, I loved him. He brought so much happiness into my life, and introduced me to so many people that I wouldn’t ever trade for the world. I felt like if I ever let him go, all these things would suddenly disappear from my life, leaving me stranded in my own pit of loneliness and self-pity.

I also clung onto the hope that he would love me back.

Even when everything came crashing down.

So, I was close to two people in his friend group, Taehyung and Yoongi, and I really trusted the both of them. So, I told them my secret.

“I think i’m in love with Jimin.”

Taehyung spat his drink out onto the coffee table in front of him.

“Huh? What do you mean? You love Jimin? Are you sure this isn’t infatuation?” He spluttered out, probably very shocked at my sudden confession. Yoongi held his cam and cool exterior, so i didn’t really know what he was thinking at the moment.

“I don’t think it’s infatuation. Every time I go near him, or think of him, or talk to him, my heart begins to flutter. It’s not under my control, if I could I would definitely not want to feel like this, but I do. When we talk, I get excited over small things. I can feel it in my bones, Tae. have you ever felt this way about a woman?”

“Not about a woman,” he blushed and turned to face the back.

“Y/n-ah. Congrats on finding love and everything, but here’s the thing: do you want a relationship with him? Otherwise, all this is irrelevant.” He bluntly stated, making Taehyung shift in his seat and making me feel a little uneasy.

He had put it harshly, but he was right. So what if I found love but didn’t want a relationship? Did I really want to spend a long time, possibly the rest of my life, with this man?

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

“Okay, then good for you.” Yoongi curtly nodded and went back to scrolling through his phone. Taehyung seemed a little off, but quickly whipped out his phone and started scrolling too.

Was it so wrong that I loved him?

Me: Jimin-ah!I have about 2 hrs before our next shoot tgt! Would you like to come over or I can go over as well :^)

Jimin ❤️: busy.

Me: We can go to the venue together :^)

Jimin ❤️: can’t. sorry.

And that’s when it all came crashing down.

He hadn’t been like this before, why was he acting so cold towards me all of a sudden? Oh, cmon y/n, it’s just a text message, maybe he’s in a meeting. You’ll see him during filming.

And I did see him during filming, but he didn’t see me.

“Jimin!” I called out to him and waved. He looked back, but looked away just as fast. His pace quickened as he disappeared into his changing room. I was left there, hurt and very confused.

Our characters did not have much interaction except for one scene. And we were going to film that one scene that day. It was a comedy drama about two colleagues fighting for the head position but end up falling in love later in the story. He was playing the boy’s overprotective friend, who causes a lot of problems later in the story, but is checking the girl out to see if she is “worthy enough” to date his friend.

“Ya, are you the idiot who is dating my best friend?” He coughed into his fist, already fully into the character.

“Are you using informal language with me? We don’t even know each other.” I snapped back, wavering a little under his strong gaze.

“Ya, listen up, I’ve heard that I’m older than you. So back off.” He squinted at me.

“Look, I don’t even know you. I’m just here t-”

“You know, you’re really pretty. Easily the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” Jimin winked at me, and I desperately searched for any signs of genuinity in what he just said. After his character had said that line, my character was supposed to throw her cup at him, but I was too busy ‘looking for love’ that I totally forgot what to do and screwed the scene up.

When the director yelled cut and we returned to our original positions, I thought I saw him roll his eyes, but I chose to ignore it.

We did the scene one more time, and we wrapped it up perfectly.

“Hey, Jimin, you were really good!” I tapped him on the shoulder and smiled at him. The corners of his lips turned up a little, and I took this as a good sign.

“You too.” He nodded at me and walked away.

Well, it could have been worse. He could have totally ignored me, but he didn’t. Does this mean that he likes me, just a little?

I spent the rest of my day smiling and thinking of him.

But as we got further and further into the filming, he ignored me more and more, and interacted with me only when it was necessary. We stopped texting regularly, and he stopped asking me out to hang. We kind of just stopped everything we had.

But, I still prayed and hoped that he had some feelings for me, because I sure did have feelings for him.

I started hanging out with Yoongi more than him, and we would just sit and talk about anything and everything under the sun. But, I needed to ask him about Jimin.

“Yoongi-ah, do you think Jimin thinks that I like him? Is that why he’s acting so strange?”

“Oh, he knows that you like him.”

What?

“What? Who told him?” I yelled, running over to his side. “Oh my god, I can’t fucking breathe. I’m going to faint.” I started hyperventilating and everything looked a little blurry.

“I think it would be best if you didn’t faint on me,” he said with a serious tone, but I could tell that he was a little worried. “I heard Jungkook talking about it to Hoseok, that Jimin knows that you like him. I didn’t tell him, if you’re wondering. And I don’t think Taehyung did either. Besides, I don’t think he’s acting strange on purpose. I’ve known Jimin for eight years now, he’s a genuine dude. He wouldn’t hurt someone intentionally. He’s just a little oblivious.”

“Do you think that he will forget about this?” I looked up at Yoongi with tears ready to spill out at any negative response Yoongi was forming in his head.

“I honestly think that he will. It might take a while, but he’ll eventually forget it and everything will go back to normal. Jimin doesn’t hold grudges easily, and I think that he’ll understand later on. But we will save that story for a time when we’re all old. You can still have feelings for him, nobody’s going to stop you. And you know, maybe he’ll like you back, but I can’t decide that for him. You just have to be patient and see what happens.” He reassured me, holding my chin up to face him as my warm tears glided down my cheeks in silence. “But for now, let’s go get some ice cream to calm you down a little. And let’s bring Seulgi along, I think she feels a little left out sometimes.” He stood up, and pulled me to my feet. He draped an arm around my shoulder and I buried my face into his shoulder.

“Thanks Yoongi.”

“It’s going to be okay.”

With Yoongi’s blessing, I continued to harbour feelings for Jimin. Seeing as I saw him almost every other day, I thought about him a lot. As I saw him acting, I thought about how he was so talented. His character was basically the comic relief, he made me laugh until my sides hurt. He never failed to make my day, and I hoped that my scenes made his day as well.

I would try to initiate conversation and we would occasionally have a short conversation about anything we wanted to talk about. I was really happy when he replied to my messages, I sometimes would screenshot our messages and show them to Seulgi so she could fangirl over the fact that I was friends with her celebrity crush.

“Y/n, can I be super honest?” She asked me once while looking at our messages. I was sitting on the couch, eagerly waiting for her reaction.

“Yeah, sure.”

“He seems like he’s replying with very little effort. You see, you typed such a long message here, and all he replied you with was a ‘cool’. I think you’re putting in too much effort into this, little sis. You might want to back down a little, give the dude some space for a bit and try again.” She sighed, and I felt a little bit of anger boiling up inside of me, not sure whether it was because of her blunt words, or the fact that I had suspected it as well.

“Seulgi, I don’t think you should butt into things like this anymore.” I murmured, taking my phone from her and slinking back to my room, locking the door behind me. I flopped onto my bed and had a long, silent cry.

I could sense that he wasn’t really putting in much effort, but he replied me. He could have ignored me.

As the months passed by, my love for him grew stronger, he pushed me away more and more, until we stopped talking altogether. I didn’t really like the distance between us, even if we saw each other regularly, and I kind of slipped into a slump. I was constantly lethargic, I had massive headaches and I felt a little numb to all emotions. Sometimes, I would lie on my bed, body ridden with insomnia, thinking about him, about us. What we were. But sometimes, I cried myself to sleep, as dramatic as that sounds.

My heart ached for him, I felt empty without him, and when I was with him, I felt heartbroken. I didn’t know how or what to feel. There were a few thoughts of self-harm running through my mind, and I did attempt to do it, but when I picked up the blunt butter knife, I couldn’t hurt myself. There was something in me screaming that it was a bad idea, and I would just end up sitting on the ground, unharmed on the outside but broken on the inside. I mentioned these things to Yoongi, and he was very supportive even though he didn’t quite understand.

“Yoongi, I feel really bad right now. Is this normal?”

“Y/n-ah. You shouldn’t feel bad. Like I told you, I’m very sure that Jimin doesn’t know that he’s hurting you. I won’t tell him so you won’t be ashamed, but I don’t think that this is something you want to keep up with. It’s very problematic and it’s taking a very obvious toll on you. You look so thin, and your eyes are dull. Take a little break of filming is what I think you should do.” He continued to talk but I couldn’t really hear him anymore.

I looked down at myself, my wrists, my thighs, my stomach. All of them seemed thinner than normal. But that was just because I had no appetite, I wasn’t bulimic or anorexic, I simply just didn’t feel like eating. But why?

There were so many articles talking about how thin I was. My fans were very supportive, telling me to be strong and be healthier, but they didn’t know what this felt like. Only I did.

And that’s when I decided that I was going to get over him.

I knew that it was going to be difficult and extremely painful for me, but this ‘relationship’ I had in my head was obviously not going to happen in real life. I didn’t blame Jimin at all, it was not his fault, neither was it mine. But sometimes, things just happen, or they don’t.

“I’m going to get over him, I’ve been stuck in this crush for too long already. It’s almost been a year and a half, I think I’m ready to stop.” Tears welled up in my eyes as I told Yoongi, and I had no intention of holding them back.

“I’m here for you.”

So, from then on, I promised myself that I would get over him. Every time I thought of him, I would mentally slap myself and think of something else, which sort of worked, but my mind would naturally gravitate back to him like a paperclip to some sort of magnet, and I had to repeat the process, leaving me mentally and physically drained by the end of the day.

I was a pretty vocal person, so I decided to talk to Yoongi about it. He was a good listener, quiet and sturdy, and he sat quietly next to me, hearing all my feelings through text or in person. Sometimes he gave me advice, which was mostly to naturally get over him, but most of the time he just sat there listening intently.

I tried talking to my other friends as well, leaving his name as a blank, but they all gave me the same response: if you want to get over him, just stop talking about him, that way you won’t think about him as much. But I already thought about him on a daily basis, so what was the difference if I shut up?

I couldn’t breathe.

All the air in my body felt like it was being sucked out. I felt like dying.

I just got home from a photoshoot that went terribly wrong because the camera director thought that I was not the right model and started throwing a fit. It turned out okay in the end, at least he didn’t hurt me, but it still hurt my feelings.

As my car was pulling up into my driveway, I felt nauseous. I bolted out of the car and ran straight for the toilet, where I emptied the contents of my stomach into the toilet bowl. NOt that there was much to empty, though.

I just sat on the ground, and reality hit me. Getting over him was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

I had done many crazy things to prepare for a role, like egg someone’s house to study their reaction, cut my hair unevenly to see what the media would say about me, and hug random strangers on the street to see what they would do.

None of them was as hard as staying conscious while having a panic attack.

And there I was, on the floor of my bathroom, having a panic attack. My breathing was rapid and shallow, and I couldn’t think straight. All my thoughts flew out the window, but the thought of Jimin stayed with me, comforting and hurting me at the same time.

I started hysterically crying, and Seulgi started banging on the door. Everything was blurry and disoriented, like I was looking through a fisheye lens. I slammed my head on the wall a few times, trying to knock some sense into myself as I hyperventilated, but it didn’t work.

I was a mess, sobbing on the damp floor, eyes bulged out, gasping for air and comfort.

What do I do? What did I do? I can’t breathe.

I tried counting the number of light bulbs in the room to take my mind off this attack, but everything became blurrier, and I had to focus on staying conscious.

My trembling hands reached out for my phone in my pocket, I had no energy to grab so I just dragged it out and held it. It looked like it was vibrating, but it was just me.

I dialed the first number that came to mind and held it next to my ear.

“Yeoboseyo?”

“Yoongi, panic, attack, please, help.” I wheezed into the phone.

“Square breathe. Four in, four hold, four out, four hold. I’ll be there, just wait for me.”

He arrived at my house with a stuffed bear and a concerned expression. I stared at him from the mountain of blankets I had buried myself under.

Seulgi had managed to open the door to the bathroom and saw me crying on the floor. She immediately managed to get me up as I was too tired to resist and brought me to my room. She was in the kitchen making me a warm drink, and I thanked the gods for my wonderful and caring sister.

“What happened?” Yoongi said as he set the bear down.

“Yoongi, I don’t know what to do.” I hiccuped and closed my eyes to soothe the headache I felt coming on. “I really want to get over him, but I feel...I feel like...I don’t know how to explain it. But, I really love him. And when I try to forget him, it hurts. And when I think of him, it hurts. Yoongi, I am hurting. My heart is hurting. I can’t do this. I’ve never been in this much pain in my life.” I started crying all over again, but this time it wasn’t hysterical. It was the silent type, where tears just fell from your eyes, making you hurt even more. My nails dug into my skin, making little crescent indents into my arm.

I was going through so much, with the fame and now this. I couldn’t take it. It was too difficult.

“Yoongi, i’m in so much pain. I want to hurt myself, but I can’t. I can’t do that to myself. I can’t continue with life like this, Yoongi, I can’t.”

I looked up and saw tears rolling down his pale cheeks, but he didn’t make an effort to wipe them away.

“It’s going to be okay.”

1 year later

“Jimin-ah! Is that you?” I yelled out, and he turned around to face me. A grin spread across his face like wildfire, and he walked towards me with a spring in his step.

“Y/n! How have you been? I haven’t seen you lin like a year!” He stepped forward and embraced me. I felt the urge to wriggle out of his touch, but I took a deep breath and hugged him back. It felt good.

“I’ve been good, a little busy with filming and photoshoots, but otherwise good! We should meet up sometime to hang out.” I smiled at him warmly, and he returned the smile with a genuine one. But, after a while, his smile faded a little, and there was a glint of worry in his eyes.

“Y/n, I need to tell you something.” He held my hands, and my breath quickened a little.

“Yoongi told me about what happened last year. About, you know, me and you.” He scratched the back of his neck nervously. “I just wanted to apologise. I swear I didn’t intentionally hurt you. I was just a little freaked that a beautiful girl like you would love an idiot like me, so I wanted to distance myself a little. I didn’t know that I would end up hurting you. I was so immature and I really just want to start over with you. Do you forgive me?”

‘Hmm,” I pretended to think, picking at my nails, teasing him a little. “I’d have to think about that. But do you know what will make me make my decision faster? Us hanging out, sometime next week? I’ll call you.” I gave him a playful thumbs up, and he laughed as he shook his head.

“Of course, we’ll arrange a date.”

“It’s settled then.” I did a playful bow to him and started to skip away, but dipped my head backwards to say something before I left.

“Hey Jimin,” I called to him and he raised his head to look at me with confusion. “Remember when I was whipped for your ass?” He tilted his head and I flashed him a cheeky smile.

“Yeah, me neither.”

#bangtan bookclub #bt-yes-network #btssunshinenet #bts fluff #bts angst #jimin x reader #jimin fluff #jimin angst #bts jimin #park jimin #i hope yall like it !!

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