#on separatism

[is-this-really--life]

I think a lot of women come on here freshly peaked having one idea of what radical feminist tumblr truly is (gender abolitionist and woman-focused advocacy) and don't realize the other darker side of it.

Separatism is introduced as this personally liberating thing you can do for yourself, to keep yourself more safe. All of these examples of male violence, you can't help but start to think it's all of them to one degree or another. Of course you want to protect yourself. It's only natural. But so much of a focus on individual action, politicized sexual purity, and separation of the sexes will not liberate us from the dehumanization of women.

What is the end goal of separatism? It's foundationless. It's rooted in fear and absolutely nothing else. Everything under it crumbles.

[reincarnatedvaleriesolanas]

I fucking ADORE it when women PEAAAAAKKKKK and speak their truth. The fact that i saw this on tiktak restored my faith in humanity

[is-this-really--life]

This isn't a lesbian/female exclusive bisexual problem, it's a separatist problem. The idea that not being with men is the pinnacle of feminist action? That's the separatist logic. Whether someone dates men or not has nothing to do with her commitment to female solidarity.

I think a lot of osa women are here in the first place because we understood the whole "attraction should be based on gender identity"/cotton ceiling thing to be fucked up and homophobic... That isn't to say there isn't a problem in gender critical spaces with homophobia. There definitely is. But the vast majority of radfem tumblr has shown solidarity with lesbians.

I'm a febfem and I think the sexuality wars are so stupid. We should all try to be understanding of each other's experiences and not use them to divide us. We need to stop stereotyping each other and treat each other first and foremost like fellow human beings.

I guess it's Opposite Day lmao??

[leikeliscomet]

The aspec community REALLY needs to add intersecting identities to these analysis' instead of making general statements. How helpful is 'ace women are seen as pure because everyone thinks all women are asexual' when we look at the sexualisation of Black women and the Jezebel, the idea Black girls are 'fast' and the general sexualisation of women of colour e.g. spicy latina trope? Are we factoring in how the desexualization of women of colour e.g. the Mammy, the 'submissive' East Asian women trope, the virginity myth isn't acceptance of female asexuality? Does 'ace men are expected to be more sexual' factor in the sexualisation of Black men and other men of colour e.g. 'savage' Arab trope and the antiblack trope that they're inherently predatory? Or the desexualisation of East Asian men? How easily can we define the ace men v ace women experience at all if trans and non-binary aces are missing from most ace representation despite facing the brunt of anti ace discrimination? If we're solely defining these experiences by cis aces? How easily can aroallos 'just have sex' when you factor in the demonisation of gay sex, HIV/AIDS crisis and seraphobia and how this affects gay, lesbian, bi and pan aros? How easily can alloaces 'just partner up' when you factor in the ban of gay marriage that is still in many countries across the globe and the historical policing of 'homosexual behaviours' and this impacts gay, lesbian, bi and pan aces? And this isn't even getting into disability, religion etc. yet. When there's SO many factors that play into how an individual participates in sex and romance, or if they're even allowed to participate at all, how much can we clearly cut the aspec experience into alloace v aroace v aroallo. Or sex favourable v sex indifferent v sex repulsed. There's A LOT we can learn from each other.

[lesbianerin]

i wish every woman could experience being in a true female only space at least once. a space away from men in a secluded area. cooking, eating, dancing, creating, swimming, existing only among women. no need for make up, clothing that’s not comfortable and practical, no bras, no shaving, no artificial femininity. if you wanna walk around naked you can be, no one’s gonna stare at you, no fear of a man sitting in the bush filming or masturbating. no body shaming or pointing out any part of your body. no pressure to look perfect. no need to look perfect. just existing and being enough, living without fear and in harmony with our bodies and nature.

[radifemsara]

[aalexan]

my heart breaks thinking about the elderly women who voted for kamala harris thinking they’d finally get to see a female president in their lifetime only for a man who wants to take women’s right away to win.

[radfemnotfemme]

CAN WE BE FR😭

[fleeing-moonlight]

I genuinely cannot fathom how anyone can be romantically attracted to men, knowing what they're capable - and, statistically, guilty - of. I cannot look at a man without wondering if he has assaulted someone, if he watches women be brutally assaulted and gets off on it, if he thinks rape jokes are funny. Just the thought of being close to a man and then discovering he's a raging misogynist makes me want to never interact with any of them, just being friends with one would make me feel guilty for having ever given him the impression that he has any place whatsoever in a civilized society.

[clit-licker420]

how fucking wild is it actually that men had to pretend to be decent human beings for 50 years MAXIMUM after untold millennia as bloodthirsty monsters and then, as a class, became hitler about it

[erebusvincent]

[is-this-really--life]

I think this space is uniquely horrible to be in both for OSA woman *and* for SSA woman. And I think it's obvious at this point why it's so awful for OSA women, because that's more overt. You get told you're politically impure for partnering with men. Of course that's insane.

But... idk there's like... this fear and this shame of being attracted to women in the wrong way. When you're a separatist, everything revolves around demonizing male sexuality, and so of course you fear emulating it. I was* afraid any attraction to women, any expression of it, in any sort of way that isn't neat and tidy, perfectly feminist and politically correct, makes me like a man. And therefore bad. I couldn't even think about wanting to fuck women without feeling ashamed.

I was only able to unpack some of this, that I felt this way, after I stopped being a separatist.

[cheeeeep]

I genuinely believe that even at the best of times a heterosexual relationship will always leave the woman dissatisfied.

Men will always lack an emotional intelligence that I believe is crucial for a woman to feel fully satisfied in her heterosexual relationship.

Even the ones who are "happy" will always make excuses and accept a certain amount of bullshit.

I am not talking about abusive relationships I am speaking on a general settling and dissatisfaction even with a "good man".

[lilithism1848]

[vexingwoman]

men be like

[returning-to-her]

Females are Gods. We should act like it.