#okay this is getting embarassing but yeah that question does exist

[popponn]

in general, sometimes i really wonder what sort of impression i make on this place

[writer-ish]

The 3rd Annual Bloom Edenbrook Fundraising Gala

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Dr. Brooke Spiers) Word Count: 2.9k Rating: Mostly T (innuendo, language, smooches)

Premise: Dr. Brooke Spiers and Dr. Ethan Ramsey get coerced into answering anonymous questions submitted by generous donors at this year's hospital fundraising gala. They have about as much fun with it as you'd expect.

This idea is all thanks to THIS ASK from the lovely @lem-20. The concept and all questions are hers! Thank you, darling Leah! ♥️

Author’s Note: My first time with a mixed-media type post(!!!) and the writing part has been done almost script-style, similar to the "Not Yet Wed" questions courtesy of @jamespotterthefirst, which you can find HERE. Hope you all enjoy. 🥰

Tickets

Bonus Raffle

SETTING - Diagnostics Office - 5:15 PM

TWO DOCTORS in formal attire sit across from one another. The male, DR. ETHAN RAMSEY, late-30s, devastatingly handsome, leans against a desk, arms crossed. The female, DR. BROOKE SPIERS, late-20s, charmingly attractive, sits on a larger table further away, legs swinging.

Ethan: I can't believe you talked me into this.

Brooke: [smirking] Why does this feel like deja vu?

Ethan: You know exactly why. You coerced me into the same sort of nonsense in your intern year for that magazine—whatever it was.

Brooke: Yeah, and remember how much publicity the hospital got that year? You're welcome.

Ethan: How can you be sure our "publicity" had to do with that article and not the fact that a first-year intern stole from a large pharamceutical company to administer an unapproved drug to—

Brooke: [hands up] Okay, okay, we get it. Regardless, you have to admit I was responsible for all the publicity. [grins]

Ethan: [can't help but grin back] Touche. [sighs deeply] Let's go home.

Brooke: Can't, babe. We're the main event.

Ethan: How did this even come about? Is there not some code of ethics against this sort of thing?

Brooke: [laughs] It's just staff and donors. All adults. We're showing that we're good sports and it's for a good cause.

Ethan: [grumbles] I don't know why people care so much about us.

Brooke: You don't? I mean, have you seen us?

Ethan: [dryly] And so humble, too.

Brooke: Lord knows you aren't with me for my humility.

Ethan: Indeed. [picks up a glass from the desk at his side, swirling the amber liquid] Well, I hope you're prepared.

Brooke: [amused] Prepared?

Ethan: You're used to me being reticent in situations like this and holding back? [downs the liquid in one shot] Not today.

Brooke: [wary] What does that mean?

DR. RAMSEY stands up, crossing the room towards DR. SPIERS until the latter is forced to open her legs to accommodate his presence. He braces a hand on either side of her, leaning forward until their lips are almost touching. Her face flushes. He notices, and a slow, lazy smile spreads.

Ethan: It means [kisses her slightly open mouth softly] I'm answering all their questions.

Brooke: [giggles nervously] All of them? But what if—

Ethan: [punctuating each word with a kiss] All. Of. Them.

He leans forward and captures her mouth in a deep, searing kiss. Her arms twine around his neck and she lets out a soft moan. Drawing her ankles around his legs she pulls him even closer and he places one hand on the desk as the other glides up her back. They stay like that, interlocked for a moment, before he pulls away.

Brooke: [eyes still closed] Hmph.

Ethan: Let's go get this over with.

Brooke: [slowly opens eyes and peers at him, disgruntled] What kinds of questions do you think people are submitting?

Ethan: Like you said, Dr. Spiers... [a slow smile spreads] Have you seen us?

DR. SPIERS laughs as she follows DR. RAMSEY out.

A.N. PLEASE do not look too closely at this very badly photoshopped pic 😂

SETTING - Bloom Edenbrook Hospital, Main Atrium - 6:25 PM

Our two doctors sit beside each other on a makeshift stage. A semi-recognizable third-year resident is the host for the evening. DR. RAMSEY dusts an imaginary piece of lint off his sleeve. DR. SPIERS has her hands in lap, knee shaking slightly. Noticing, Dr. Ramsey reaches over and rests his hand on her leg. She looks over with a small smile and places her hand over his.

Thank you to our very own Chief of Medicine, Dr. Ethan Ramsey, and his partner, head of the Diagnostics Team, Dr. Brooke Spiers, for being here with us today for a good cause. Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Spiers, are you prepared to answer some questions provided by our generous, anonymous donors?

Brooke: Sure, why not.

Ethan: [through gritted teeth] For a good cause.

Alright, excellent. I will be drawing these questions at random. Thank you to all who donated for the opportunity to submit a question.

Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Spiers, you will both be posed a question. If you choose to answer, you must both answer. If you choose not to, you must match the donation made by the donor, in lieu of a verbal response. Are you ready to begin?

Ethan: Mmm.

Brooke: [nervous laugh] I suppose.

Alright, here we go!

First question: If he/she could take one thing to a desert island what would it be?

Brooke: Me.

[Audience whoops and laughs]

Ethan: [can't hide his smirk, before clearing his throat] Brooke would take her phone. Heaven forbid she can't post about something on Pictagram.

Brooke: It's true. I'm sorry for being such a young millennial needy for external validation.

What are your nicknames for each other?

Brooke and Ethan: [look at each other. Brooke laughs.]

Ethan: Just say it.

Brooke: I mean, it's nothing too embarassing. I call him babe usually, or baby sometimes if I'm feeling extra nice. He calls me—[blushes and looks over at Ethan]

Ethan: [sighs] 'My love'. I call her 'my love'.

[Audience "awwww"s]

Who’s the better cook?

Brooke: Oh, Ethan. A hundred percent.

Ethan: It's true.

Brooke: I'm abysmal.

Ethan: Normally I would demur when it comes to Dr. Spiers' perceived faults, but in this case she's correct.

Brooke: Thanks, babe.

Ethan: You have many wonderful qualities that don't involve ovens, my love.

[A squeal from the audience that sounds suspiciously like Sienna]

Who has the last word in an argument?

[simultaneously] Brooke: Ethan Ethan: Brooke

[They look at each other]

Brooke: [laughs incredulously] Seriously?

Ethan: You think I don't hear you muttering to yourself after you walk away, almost every single time?

Brooke: Oh, so cursing your name and your very existence counts as the last word and not you shouting [affects deep voice] "And that's final!"? Duly noted.

Ethan: I don't sound like that or say that.

Brooke: Mm, sure.

Who is best at keeping secrets?

Brooke: Uh, neither of us?

Ethan: I had a secret once and it was hell keeping it.

Brooke: You've had a couple.

Ethan: True. I'm done with secrets.

Brooke: In lighter news, we kept [gestures between the two of them] this thing a secret for a bit. No?

Ethan: [opens his mouth to agree, when he's interrupted by a shout from the audience—]

Audience member that sounds suspiciously like Elijah: Nope! We all knew!

[Audience loudly murmurs in agreement]

Brooke: Never mind, then.

Who wears the trousers in the relationship?

Ethan: Neither of us subscribes to antiquated beliefs of superiority in a relationship. We're partners and teammates and work together accordingly. Sometimes she helps and guides me and sometimes I do the same for her. There is no one person who holds higher ground over the other and to imply otherwise would be foolish.

Brooke: [literal heart eyes at Ethan] What he said. [stage whisper] Except it's me.

[Audience laughs as Ethan rolls his eyes]

What is his/her worst habit?

Brooke: Workaholic, poor communication skills, yells first and asks questions later… I could go on.

Ethan: Charming. I have two words for you: messy packrat.

Brooke: Excuse me?

Ethan: If I had a nickel for every useless piece of garbage you kept "just in case" or for each article of clothing on the floor of my bedr—[clears throat] Just trust me.

Brooke: [smirks and whispers against Ethan's ear so only he can hear] Sorry, who is responsible for my clothes on the floor…?

Ethan: [says nothing but smirks as well]

[Audience murmurs in scandal]

What three words would you use to describe them?

Brooke: Hmm. Let me think.

Ethan: Passionate, caring, intelligent.

Brooke: [looks at him fondly] You came up with those fast.

Ethan: [matter-of-factly] I could give them ten more easily.

[Audience "awww"s]

Brooke: [to the audience] No, no, no don't be fooled, he doesn't mean only the flattering words, trust me.

Ethan: I believe it's your turn.

Brooke: Dedicated, compassionate, brilliant.

Ethan: [smiles softly at Brooke, who avoids his gaze. He reaches over and squeezes her hand.]

Brooke: [mutters] Yeah, yeah.

What celebrity do you/they think they most look like?

[Both Ethan and Brooke look at the announcer quizzically.]

Brooke: Celebrity? Uhh…

Ethan: I don't even know how I would begin to answer this question.

Brooke: Ryan Reynolds?

[Audience laughs and loudly disagrees]

Ethan: Who?

Brooke: [laughs and shakes her head] I don't know! I just named a random hot guy. You name a redhead actress. Jessica Chastain?

Ethan: [confused] Do you mean Jessica Rabbit?

Brooke: No I don't mean— [looks at him incredulously] Are you saying you think I look like Jessica Rabbit?

Ethan: No, I thought that's what you were saying and I was about to tell you how incorrect you were. Er, that is to say—

Brooke: I feel like you're digging yourself into a hole here.

Ethan: Agreed.

Who is the most vain?

Ethan: Both of us have more pressing concerns than our physical appearance.

Brooke: Ethan.

Ethan: [splutters]

Brooke: If you're going based off who spends more time on their hair in the bathroom? Ethan.

Ethan: [crosses his arms and glowers, but doesn't disagree]

What is his/her guilty pleasure?

Brooke: Ethan's is cooking shows, particularly Nigella.

Ethan: It's true. Brooke's is high calorie indulgences like—what's the freezer cake you made me buy the other day? With no identifiable or even passably edible ingredients?

Brooke: Ooh, Deep 'n Delicious. So good.

Ethan: [rolls eyes] Yes, because we all need our daily dose of hydrogenated oils and preservatives.

If they had a free pass, which celebrity would they choose to sleep with?

[Look at each other blankly]

Brooke: Uhh… Nigella?

Ethan: This Ryan Reynolds fellow?

Brooke: [laughs] I don't even like him!

Ethan: So who, then?

Brooke: [crosses her arms] I notice you didn't deny Nigella.

Ethan: This question is stupid. Next question.

Where and when did you go on your first date?

Brooke: Derry Roasters

Ethan: What? No. I took you to Sorellina—

Brooke: What, three years after we first met? No. Our first date was Derry Roasters when you caught me following you that time.

Ethan: Ah, so she finally admits it. I thought at the time I was… what was it, "paranoid"?

Brooke: [laughs only a touch guiltily] Did I say that?

Ethan: So you're treating the first time you trailed after me to the local coffee shop as our first date?

Brooke: Well, you paid.

Ethan: Yeah, after you "forgot" your wallet.

Brooke: What, you thought I pursued you for your good looks? No, sir. I like a man with deep pockets. Plus, you know how I know it was a first date?

Ethan: Please, enlighten me.

Brooke: You ordered for me and I didn't get annoyed and it was horrible, but I still drank the whole thing.

Ethan: The espresso Romano is not horr—

Brooke: Horrible. Coffee and lemon? [shudders] That's how I knew I was into you.

Ethan: [intrigued] Really? Way back then?

Brooke: [nods, blushing slightly, and rolls her eyes] Oh brother, don't act so shocked. You knew.

[Audience laughs and whoops]

Ethan: [shell-shocked face showing he absolutely did not know]

Where was your first kiss?

Brooke: [sheepishly] Miami.

[Audience murmurs in surprise]

Ethan: [sighs] Yes.

Brooke: Is that—are Harper and Naveen exchanging money?

Naveen: [from the audience] Dr. Emery should know better than to question my instincts!

Ethan: [loudly groans] Next question.

Who is the loudest in bed?

Brooke: [yelps and, remembering Ethan's earlier warning, throws her hand over his mouth]

Ethan: [from behind her hand] You probably could have made the answer less obvious.

Brooke: [blushes and groans]

[Audience roars its approval]

Which of your friends do you think he/she is most likely to have a crush on?

Brooke: Ohhh, this is awkward.

Ethan: My friends?

Brooke: Considering we can list your friends on one hand…and some of them intersect with mine. [bites lip] What do we do with this one?

Ethan: [to the host] What did the donor pay?

Sorry?

Ethan: To submit this question. How much?

Oh, uhh—[checks] $200.

Ethan: I'll write you a cheque for $200. Next question.

Brooke: [shakes her head laughing] All the questions, huh?

Ethan: At my discretion, yes.

Bryce: [from the audience] You know the answer was me for both of you, anyway!

Ethan: [scoffs] Fat chance, Lahela.

Brooke: [pointedly silent, staring straight ahead]

Ohh-kay. Next question. Who had feelings first?

Brooke: Ha, me. For sure.

Ethan: Are you sure?

Brooke: [looks at him incredulously] I just told you I liked you even after you bought me lemon coffee at Derry Roasters three years ago. [sits up to look at him more fully] No chance you liked me earlier than that. I mean, like-liked me.

Ethan: "Like-liked you"? Are we twelve?

Brooke: You know what I mean. You were such a grouch and I was just your annoying intern.

Ethan: [irritatedly] The annoying intern I kissed in Miami, what, a week later? Is that how obvious my lack of feelings for you were?

Brooke: [opens her mouth to respond and then closes it again]

Ethan: That's what I thought.

Who’s more dramatic?

Brooke: Ethan.

Ethan: I am absolutely not—

Brooke: See? Honestly, he's exhausting.

Ethan: [glowers]

Who has the weirdest orgasm face?

Brooke: Weirdest?

Ethan: Oh for the love of—

$5000 to not answer this one, doctors.

Brooke and Ethan: [jaws drop simultaneously]

Brooke: Someone paid five-thousand dollars—

Ethan: What kind of a pervert—? Fine, say it's me.

Brooke: It's really not.

Ethan: [quietly] Well, it's certainly not you.

Brooke: Yeah, but—

I believe we have our answer!

Ethan: We'll take it. Next!

What are you most likely to argue about?

Ethan: Brooke believes I could be more communicative about my feelings, especially when I have a problem.

Brooke: You do listen!

Ethan: Of course. We also argue about when she's going to move in with me.

[Audience gasps and murmurs in gleeful scandal]

Brooke: [jaw drops] Ethan!

Ethan: It's true. [turns to host] I believe it should have already happened. She believes she needs to maintain a tenuous hold on a bedroom she rarely occupies for a group of roommates who would be happy for her to move on.

Brooke: [fuming] Of all the high-handed—

Jackie, from the audience: He's right, girl, bigger and better awaits.

Brooke: [through gritted teeth, as Sienna, Ethan, and Aurora all nod and give her thumbs up] Maybe this is something we can talk about later—

Ethan: Whatever you say, my love.

Brooke: Oh, yeah, now with the "my love"s—

On that note! Here is our final question.

What’s the most romantic thing they’ve done for you?

Ethan: [looks at Brooke, who is still glowering] Most romantic?

Brooke: [glares]

Ethan: With Brooke, it's the little things. She'll notice when I'm having a bad day and bring me my favourite donut. Or a well-timed hand on my shoulder or knee when she can see I'm getting riled up.

Brooke: [glare softens a bit]

Ethan: She's thoughtful and kind and extremely empathetic. She knows what I need even before I know that I need it. It's not—candlelit dinners or what have you, but I've already prided myself on being a practical person and this intersection of—of practicality and care? That's what I find… [struggles to get the word out] romantic.

[Audience "awww"s]

Brooke: [screws up her mouth before leaning over to kiss Ethan on the cheek] Okay, that was sweet. [Thoughtfully] Most romantic thing Ethan has done for me? Well… [side-eyes him, before continuing] The HAZMAT suit sleepover last year was probably up there.

Ethan: [uncomfortable] I don't want that to be classified as—

Brooke: You were there for me at a time when I needed you most. If that's not romance, I don't know what is.

Ethan: [increasingly agitated] That's not romance, dammit, that's—that was a necessity. That was vital. I needed to be there. I needed to make sure you—that you—[cuts himself off, clenching his jaw]

Brooke: [eyes soft as she looks at him. Reaching out she rests her hand on top of his clenched fist until it unfurls slowly underneath hers and he releases his breath slowly] See? [softly] Romance.

Ethan: [sighs deeply, then links his fingers with hers and gruffly kisses the top of her hand] All this tells me is that I've neglected you on the "romance" side of things.

Brooke: [still smiling softly] No complaints. [looks out at the audience] Are we done here? [affects a deep voice] Are you not entertained?

Ethan: [fondly] And she says I'm the dramatic one.

I think we got what we needed, doctors. Thank you for helping out for a good cause. This raffle ticket session alone raised a total of $23,000 for Bloom Edenbook Hospital!

Ethan: [dumbfounded] That is insane.

Brooke: I promise we aren't that interesting.

The people beg to differ. Round of applause for Dr. Brooke Spiers and Dr. Ethan Ramsey for being such good sports. Until next time, doctors!

Ethan: [over thunderous applause] There absolutely won't be a next time.

Brooke: [laughs and stands up, smoothing out her dress]

Audience member that sounds suspiciously like Jackie: Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!

Rest of the audience chimes in: Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!

Brooke: [crosses her arms, smirking at Ethan]

Ethan: Oh for the love of— [acts like he's walking away, then loops an arm around her waist and pulls her close, tilting her back and kissing her thoroughly]

[Audience roars its approval]

Ethan: [pulls away slowly and sets her upright, chucking her chin with an affectionate and slightly devilish smirk. He starts to guide her away from the host and off the makeshift stage]

Brooke: [mutters, still a bit dazedly] Told you. Drama.

[Laughing, they walk off stage together.]

[charlotteswriting]

I enjoyed sally's mask ask with sdr2 cast can i have same but with ndrv3 cast?

Here you go, anon! I hope you enjoy this — you also requested this with THH cast so I’ll be writing that today, too! :D -Mod Kaede

Shuichi Saihara

He is aware of your boundaries so he won’t pressure you about it but he is really curious of your face!

The first time he met you he thought you were wearing it because you lacked confidence but when he found out the real reason he felt sorry for you

If you were to take your mask off in front of him, he wouldn’t look away though he’d be shocked but also happy that you trust him enough—he gets really emotional🥺and sweet🥺

He doesn’t really mind your appearance. He fell in love with you because of your personality and he still thinks you’re the (most beautiful/handsome) prettiest person in the world!!

Kaito Momota

He’s so noisy about it LMAO

Constantly begs you to take it off and he acts like literally a child—i ain’t joking😌😌

Though he knows his limits and will stop insisting once he senses it annoys you-

If you trust him enough to take your mask off in front of him, he’ll be more than excited

Once you take it off he’ll give you A HUG because he wants you to know he APPRECIATES it

If anyone dares to hurt you or judge you he’ll back 🤺 them 🤺 off 🤺 grrr

Not on his watch😌

Ryoma Hoshi

He’s a member of “Appearance? More like Personality ✨✨” Squad

Seriously though, he isn’t even gonna ask you to take it off. If you felt confident enough about it, you would and he knows that

Doesn’t pressure you not even a bit🥺

If you were to say something like “You won’t probably like it,” he’ll disagree as soon as you say that. He’s like: Not in my house.

He wouldn’t be against the idea of you taking off your mask when you two are spending time alone.

If you took your mask off in front of him, he wouldn’t think pity, he’d just feel sorry that you’ve had gone through something so harsh.

Gonta Gokuhara

Gonta, being the gentleman he is, won’t let anyone or anything hurt you🥺

He’s probably the most understanding one bahahah

He’s the type that will caress your wounds and will tell you how amazing you are if you’re having struggles or looking down on yourself

Just stoooooop. Gonta thinks you’re amazing and you don’t deserve this!

Gonta won’t judge you if you were to take your mask off in front of him—he wouldn’t mind your appearance—he’s the type that will compliment about it!!

But he means it. You’re pretty/beautiful/handsome just the way you are!

Kokichi Ouma

Aaww, he’ll do anything to see what’s behind that mask of yours!

He’s asking you many questions and messing with you—simply does anything for you to take off your mask (didn’t pass the vibe check)

But I feel like he’d stop if you told him to- THANK GOD

He’d be reaaaally impressed by your appearance and if you were to look down on yourself—well, let’s say you’ll be receiving LOTS OF KISSES AND LOVE

“You look stunning and that’s no lie, S/O!”

He thinks you’re so charming, literally flawless. Tell them, Kokichi 😌

Still a perfect match, hehe

Korekiyo Shinguji

Same people different fonts

He’s already blinded by u!! If you were to take off your mask you’d just make him love you more bahahah 💀

Nothing really changes, he just admires you

He doesn’t mind if you decide to wear your mask, he’ll let you know he’s gonna accept you anyways,

He’s ready to tell you nice words and show his affection if you’re feeling insecure

“S/o, I can’t believe you were hiding this from me. You’re still breathtaking.” ajjejtjrkgfgk he’s cheesy like that<3 kthkyhhjj he’s just being sweet

Your appearance don’t really matter to him since he fell in love because of your personality and your beautiful nature🥺🥺

Rantaro Amami

He’s a chill guy but when it comes to you I can say he’s the sweetest one around <3

He’s so easygoing and will not hesitate to tell you how beautiful you are needed or not aejtkktg

He’s like your biggest supporter!!!

You taking off your mask around him means so much to him because it basically means you trust him enough to do that and he holds back his tears all the time:(

Fuck it. Not only that, you trusting him itself means the world to him😩💞💞

Rantaro, you guys have been together for a long time now lmao why’re you so surprised-

Let him have his happiness

K1-B0 (Kiibo)

He. 🥺

He kiNd oF wants you to know that you’re the prettiest human he has ever seen

And if you’re having a hard time accepting this absolute TRUTH, he’ll take that as an insult

He’s reaaally curious of your face but he doesn’t know how to bring it up and always stutters and embarasses himself so do a favor for him and tell him it’s okay

When you first took off your mask he,, screamed because he thought you dropped your mask and didn’t do that intentionally😤

He stared for a sec,, then looked away because he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, pff:(

But if you assure him it wasn’t a mistake, he’ll tell you the sweetest words you’ll ever hear🥺

Kaede Akamatsu

I kin her sm omg

She thinks you’re a literal sunshine and you didn’t deserve this

Neverthless she LOVES you and will let you know that anytime or anywhere!

She’ll support you and will tell you nice things about you if you’re seeking support 🤧

Respects your boundaries but can’t help but wonder about your face, too

So when you took it off for the first time she was so hyped about it!!

She thinks you have an angel’s face, it’s such a shame you had to go through that

Insists on keeping your mask off when you two are alone, if you say yes she’ll gonna be so happy about it aah

Tenko Chabashira

She couldn’t help but imagine how you looked like behind that mask of yours

You had to scold her multiple times for daydreaming too much, ugh

She thinks you still look stunning! You’re her S/o, there’s no way you’d look otherwise!

And she means that.

The first time she saw you she stared you for way TOO MUCH and you had to ask if anything’s wrong ajtkgrerkhhk

And she just says it’s because you look so pretty without your mask rkykyyjhjj 💍🧎‍♀️

She’ll ask for you to take off your mask more often

So you keep it off just to see her reactions and she boosts your ego with her kind words

Just kiss already smh 🙄

Tsumugi Shirogane

Okay but she was fangirling over you?? Before even you took off your mask??

Yes, your personality was what mattered to her the most. She loved how sweet, how nice you are to her🥰

If you were to call yourself mean things, she’d immediately disagree! “But how could you, S/o?... I think you’re really pretty...! With or without mask.”

If you’re having insecurities she’ll be there for you—her easygoing nature and kind words really helps you!

The first time you took off your mask...? *Fangirl Tsumugi noises* She had a nosebleed lmao

“You’re so beautiful/handsome, S/O!!!”

Maki Harukawa

She won’t ask you to show your face unless you mention it

She acts cool

But inside, she’s begging you to take your mask off so she can see your blessing face😤

Won’t admit but she already knew you looked cute under it, pff

“S/o, why you still bother to wear it? You know, you don’t have to when it’s just me and you,”

Bahahahah she’s finding excuses just to see your face-

If looks could kill, she’d die from your beauty but will she ever tell you that? Nope.

Also will kill anyone that dares to attempt hurting your feelings, I mean how could they?

She feels sorry for you and understands you. As her S/o, you’re someone she can open up to and is actually grateful you can open up to her as well🥺

Angie Yonaga

You didn’t even have to take off your mask in the first place because she was already ready to accept you!!!

She thinks you’re already perfect

If you were to take off your mask she’d have a big smile on her face and would give you cute compliments about it just to express her happiness

“S/o, even Atua thinks you’re breathtaking!” Yeah, and by compliments I mean she conveys compliments told by Atua.

They’re her true thoughts

She thinks you’re so precious you even inspire her to do more art ✨✨ Whenever you are around she feels herself filled with passion

Since you make her feel at her best, she’ll do the same for you. Her favorite thing to do is planting kisses on your face.

Himiko Yumeno

At first she might look as if she isn’t really interested about your appearance

But that’s just her nature. She’s actually curious in her own unique way but doesn’t know how to bring that up

Even though compliments from her are rare, they always make you feel better about yourself because they’re coming from HER

But how she wants to see your face? She’ll probably say stuff like her magic can cure your face or something like that lmao

But when you actually take it off, she just forgot her words

“Your face doesn’t need my magic, S/o. It’s already perfect.”

You’re like: 💆‍♀️

But at the same time: 🥺

Kirumi Tojo

As the amazing person you are, your mood being as amazing as you are is one of her priorities

So if you’re feeling down, she’ll be there for you until you’re feeling better

Holding you, cuddling, telling you nice words etc.

You’re someone she can be relaxed around, so she wants you to feel the same

So she’ll politely ask you to take off your mask when she’s around you, which you’ll agree after thinking a little about it

She doesn’t judge you and she’s down to do anything to tell you she appreciates your existence

Which makes you feel a lot better about yourself

“S/O, please know that I’m here for you anytime. And know that you’re pretty.”

Miu Iruma

Hahahah this girl

This girl wanted to see you so much that she literally kneeled down and cried to you

Seeing her like this, you played along a bit more, it was fun seeing her cry like that

“Okay, okay, stop. But don’t freak out, okay...?”

She didn’t get what you exactly mean. Did you look bad??

When you took off your mask she was even more confused. Because there stood you that looked as much as pretty as her???

No! She can’t drool over you now!

“What?! You’ve been hiding this from me? What’s wrong with you, S/O? You’re so hot!”

And she boosts your ego like that even when you don’t need it

If nobody got you, Miu got you, amen

Aahhh this took so long aıekfgkrkfgkkhj REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!! And you can always dm me if you want!! :) -Mod Kaede

[likeshipsonthesea]

dex, team bicycle

the following bullet fic has been in my drafts for over a year now and tonight i remembered it existed, read it, and decided to post it. why? who knows. don’t ask questions. just ~enjoy~

so i got an ask about how anon trusts me implicitly when it comes to writing bc they believe that dex is the team bicycle and eventually ends up with nursey and thinks i’m down with that too and tbh they ain’t wrong so like

here’s a bullet fic instead of me doing any of the work i SHOULD REALLY FUCKING BE DOING okie

first things first here’s the dealio this is crack-ish but also not so crackish that my dumbass couldn’t see it happening so let’s just suspend some disbelief and have a good time

first time dex hooks up with a teammate it’s not at a kegster

maybe a little later he’s a little too tipsy at a kegster not really knowing his own tolerance for tub juice yet and he’s dancing, a little more white boy than maybe one would like but he’s having fun with it and that’s half the game, and he’s sweaty and maybe some glitter from other dancers has rubbed off on him and he’s glittery and shining and he catches someone’s eye across the room (holster, i’m thinking holster) and holster sees him and thinks fuck and dex is maybe really into how big holster is and just like follows him up to the attic when holster grabs his wrist and pulls because why not--

but this is not about that (at least not yet) this is about how dex, new to samwell and ncaa hockey and everything, wants to be the best he can be in everything so naturally he goes to the best person to help him with every thing (for school he gets tutors and goes to tutorials and goes to all the profs’ office hours, for social stuff maybe he trails ransom around idk (that’s for later)) but for hockey he obviously goes to the person you go to when you need help with hockey

jack

LOOK OKAY I GET IT ZIMBITS FOR LIFE BUT HEAR ME OUT

jack likes hockey. jack likes people who like hockey. jack likes when people are really into hockey

so when the little angery frog that seemed real appreciative of his butt on hazeapalooza comes to him with this frowny face determination asking how he can be the best player he can be, a part of jack’s brain that’s very quiet and seldom acknowledged goes “huh.”

and maybe they start meeting up for their own practices, practicing drills and plays so dex can get his speed up and reaction time down and just get better and jack’s benefiting from it too in a way, like trying to help a defensive player makes him have to switch up his thinking about things a bit and it’s helping his defensive play on the ice

and so this goes on for a bit and maybe they build up some inside jokes in between all the intensity and maybe there’s some playful moments in the locker room when they bump arms or throw a few chirps around and it’s cute okay and not too serious, jack isn’t in love with the kid (he’s a kid, lord, okay a lil problematic but if y’all know anything about my oc luke dex has Problems with Authority figures so whatever)

but the truth is jack doesn’t really have many people he’d be comfortable “relieving some stress” with, like there’s shitty but he’s ridiculously straight, and Camila went and got herself a girlfriend so that’s no longer a thing, and dex is there and eager and fun and

and long story short they end up fucking in the locker room oops

it doesn’t happen too many times after that, maybe once on a roadie, a few times at the haus. it’s fun, not in a laughing way or whatever, but it’s casual and it’s nice to get off and it doesn’t make jack any more anxious and dex is probably working through some issues he has with tall dark haired captains and they both get something good out of it, which is the point, anyway

and it ends maybe before winter break, either jack decides to focus on the nhl and his thesis and dex totally understands or dex realizes that maybe his thing with dark haired captains isn’t completely healthy and ends things but either way it’s nbd and no one on the team ever really knows, though it’s not like they lie about it either but who’s gonna ask, right?

and so dex and jack were fuckbuddies. for a time. noice.

now let’s return to that kegster scene, hmm?

so the way i picture it is dex hooks up with holster at a kegster, realizes it probably wasn’t the smartest idea he’s ever had but doesn’t completely freak out because holster’s a relaxed kind of guy, dex is sure it won’t get nuts

meanwhile holster wakes up freaking out because he just fucked ransom’s frog and that is so not cool so then he panics and avoids ransom and dex for like a week and then decides okay okay it’s not a big deal he just won’t tell anyone, it won;t happen again, it’s fine

and then he walks in on dex hooking up with ransom and he’s like Wow Okay So the Fine Thing Didn’t Work Out Huh

turns out while holster was freaking out ransom was really mopey about it and dex, not really knowing how to fix it, tried to comfort him and ended up... in bed

look this version of dex is a little thotty and knows like two ways of comforting people and he didn’t think getting drunk in the middle of the day was a good idea

and so long story short after some brief HUHs going around dex ends up hooking up with both ransom and holster for a bit (sometimes both at once!) and eventually the both-at-once-stuff makes ransom and holster actually acknowledge the feelings they’ve mostly been ignoring since their frog year and they explain this to dex who’s like okie bc he’s really only there bc they’re both hot and so ransom and holster get together and dex sometimes helps them out on date nights and that’s about it

lbr tho they never tell anyone how they actually got together bc they would never live it down so they say nothing and dex doesn’t either bc it’s not his relationship and the world goes on never knowing

so now we’re getting into the middle of spring term dex’s frog year and he’s kind of maybe sort of acknowledged that he has some kind of emotions about nursey that aren’t helpful so he’s attempting to repress real hard, but he’s also learning to repress less about other things, specifically his enjoyment of baking.

yup. you guessed it.

Bitty.

so he starts helping bitty in the kitchen A Lot, and sometimes they talk and sometimes they don’t and sometimes they talk about important things but most of the time they don’t, but at this stage in bitty’s life he is crushing very hard on a certain dark haired captain and that’s kind of really apparent in, like, everything he does so it takes dex maybe two weeks to realize what’s going on

and okay so it’s a little awkward bc 1-the fuckbuddies thing but also bc 2-dex knows how it feels to have feelings for a friend and it kind of sucks like a lot and he wants to make bitty feel better and yeah maybe this is another case of dex being bad at comforting people with his clothes on

but maybe also one day they’re talking about relationships/being gay idk something and bitty maybe casually (southern euphemistically) mentions that he’s never, erm, never quite, uh, never  done the dirty with a boy and maybe he sounds a lil embarassed about it idk and dex’s I Can Fix That brain switches on and he says, “I can help.”

and bitty’s like. what.

dex blushes and clears his throat and says it again. “i can help. i’ve, uh, done it before, and i can, like. show you.” then he pauses and, very uncasually, says, “casually.”

bitty, also pink at his point because he’s a sweet southern boy who doesn’t speak of such things, asks, “you’d be willing to do that?”

dex nods. he does not say that he’s done something like that before. he very pointedly does not say that.

and bitty, well, he’s pining and he’s been at college for a year and a half and the most action he’s ever gotten was with that boy who puked on his shoes and, you know, he came to samwell so that he could be who he is and maybe this is a way he can prove to himself that he is being true to himself.

it also doesn’t hurt that dex is v pretty, okay, bitty loves a boy with big shoulders and freckles.

and so dex and bitty start hooking up.

it’s somewhat like my The Arrangement fic where dex is sort of “showing bitty the ropes” but bitty, lbr, he’s a quick learner and he did his research so it very quickly just becomes hooking up for the sake of it

and it’s good. like. really good and both of them are benefiting from having someone to escape from their ~feelings~ in and bitty’s more comfortable in sexuality (like, his sexuality not his gayness ya feel me?) and everyone’s having a great time

then they lose the playoffs and emotions run high and bitty realizes how decimated he’s going to be by jack leaving and they don’t really have a conversation about it (let’s be real, neither of these boys talk about their feelings, at least not at this point) but dex goes home that summer with the understanding that he and bitty are no longer doing the thing, and that’s okay with him, really, because maybe now his feelings for nursey are becoming More of A Thing Than He Was Hoping They Would

of course bitty gets with jack at this time, so he’s kind of through the roof, and if, maybe, they have a conversation about their ex’s/past lovers and find they have.. more things in common than expected, well, at the least it’s a bit of a laugh and at the most well. let’s just say sometimes a ginger is mentioned in their bed WHATEVER OKAY MOVING ON

dex comes back in the fall ready to suppress the fuck out of his emotions and play some damn good hockey and who appears but this super eager tadpole

this now plays out as the first two chapters of my The Arrangement fic, though i guess now for canonical reasons whiskey ends up with lax bro and not tango, but that’s alright, we’re good at working on our feet here

for those who haven’t read the fic, dex shows whiskey how to gay sex while simultaneously gaining his trust and encouraging him to bond with the team and for personal reasons whiskey is a little shit but not as much of an asshole as he was in canon (look i love the guy but he’s a dick) and anyway go read my fic it’s good i promise #selfspon moving on

the latter half of dex’s sophomore year is spent mostly Not Pining for nursey and getting closer to him, friend wise, until the whole dib-flip, living together situation occurs, dex has a Freak Out, and ruins things a little

..this is getting off track, but long story short, his captains kiss each other on live tv and dex’s family starts to suspect that all those rumors that drifted around him in high school may have more truth to them than they’d been hoping and dex has a less than great summer break, coming back to school in the opposite of a good mindset

nursey also has a not great break (his parents are fighting, then he comes to school and breaks his wrist and can’t play hockey) and well we all know where this ends up

this leaves dex in a very mopey gross state and who to help someone feel better in their time of need than the sweetest little waffle you’ve ever seen in your life?

yes, it’s time for Hops.

now, this is a rather short lived affair, but over thanksgiving break, the entirety of the haus goes home to their families except for dex (who says he can’t deal with bus fare, and begs off any offers of help) and hops, who technically isn’t in the Haus, but stays there for the break while his parents are on a work trip during the holiday

dex ends up finding out just exactly how College Hockey Boy hops is when he almost burns the kitchen down trying to make a grilled cheese and dex decides then that he has to help this boy learn how to human, so they spend the first two days together with dex teaching hops all the basic skills dex thinks someone should know

this is included but not limited to: how to cook without making fire, how to change the oil in your car, how to hotwire a car, how to fix various different appliances, how to take the optimal notes, how to basic code, and how to sort and do your laundry

hops is enjoying the crash course (kid is just grateful to finally know where the detergent goes in a washer) but also, like, lbr. watching someone be competent in a thing--esp a thing you are yourself not good at--is a giant turn on, and so after two days of watching dex be really good at adulting, they settle onto the couch after doing the dishes and hops just gets on his knees and--

we aren’t smutting here on good christian tumblr but boy. hops is an eager kid.

anyway they spend a week fucking and then stop because hops falls in love with a girl in his intro class and then spends the next two months asking dex for advice on how to woo her, even though obviously chowder would be a better bet.

then comes the playoffs and everything is heating up and they’re on roadies nearly every weekend, still keeping up with their coursework, and it’s A Lot, and dex is really feeling it this year, especially with all the shit bitty’s been getting, and one night, on a roadie, he and bully get back to their room and dex collapses with a groan on the bed and bully, chill as anything, is like. “you seem pretty stressed. wanna fuck?”

and, you know what? dex is still his thotty (though more mature) self and he’s like, life sucks a little right now, why not get off

and so he does.

he and bully hook up through the playoffs and into the post-season (that post-final game sex is A Lot my dudes lemme tell you) but then dex gets elected captain and something twisty in his chest tells him that he should not be fucking someone on the team, especially not an underclassman, when he’s got that authority over him, and so he breaks it off with bully

who is pretty chill about it, since he’s bully, though he does miss the sex. the sex was p good.

and, to be quite honest, that’s it. dex wouldn’t fuck any of the baby frogs for the same reason he broke it off with bully (also ngl the senior-freshman thing doesn’t do it for him anymore) and so dex goes through his senior year of college without having any fuckbuddies--his first year of college so far, actually, where he doesn;t

the end

.

.

.

lol jk he and nursey start hooking up and it’s a Whole Bundle of emotions

in keeping with the rest of the fuck buddies, dex thinks that this is just like all the other times and nursey has no reason to think dex wants anything more and like. the sex is good, like very good, and neither of them are complaining per se but they’re also in love and haven’t said anything, and i imagine there are some ill-timed confessions prior to the final game of the playoffs and then they win another ncaa championship title and have sex in a janitor’s closet (but like,, emotional sex) and they live happily (thottily) ever after

i also like to imagine that there’s a point somewhere down the line when they all meet up for a reunion and something happens-- probably ransom and holster get a lil tipsy and finally tell the truth of how they got together-- and everyone basically does the spider-man meme but with “wait-you had sex with dex? i had sex with dex” and nursey--who knows bc dex told him when they finally got together-- is just sitting there all smug with his arm around a steadily reddening dex bc he’s fucking proud of the fact that everyone knows exactly how good his boyfriend is in bed

[alystar00]

This will be a list of the things I said on instagram while watching Twilight for the first time in my life. I should warn you that I watched it in Italian, so I will translate the dialogues by myself back to English. I’m sorry for the inaccuracies (actually not that much).

I won’t put the pictures and I won’t probably show the actual scenes. Have fun trying to figure out the scenes. I will put some red comments when needed.

Enjoy

-

I am doing it. (For contest, until I put it on I didn’t decide if I was gonna watch it or not).

The four of them are embarassing. Update: she almost hit Jacob with the car door.

Between the dramatic fan and him like this I am laughing. No, upgrade, he’s creepy.

What does it mean he’s not there, I wanted her to confront him (I cannot really translate what I said here)

What the hell, is he in heat? He keeps looking at her like a maniac.

I didn’t really get it but. “You had black eyes and now they’re auburn.” “Yeah it’s ✨ the lamps ✨”.

In the meanwhile Edward very clever to destroy a car to save Bella- YOU COULD LITERALLY JUST PULL HER AWAY AND NOTHING ELSE, YOU DRAMATIC BITCH. 

The doctor goes directly to PTSD- yeah okay calm down

“How did you get there next to me?” THIS ONE DESTROYED A CAR WITH HIS BARE HANDS AND THAT’S WHAT YOU ASK HIM?

Ah alright she asked him now.

Edward looks like a bad boy made in a bad way, I already hate him

“To the ball. The ball where you have to dance. Yeah, it’s not for me”. Mood Bella, mood. (Spare my google translator english please)

“What are you going for in Jacksonville?” “How do you know?” “Can’t you answer my question?” “You don’t answer any of mine”. BELLA HAS A PAIR OF BRAIN CELLS THAT DO WORK. I don’t really like Edward, he’s that mysterious and ugh-

Summary of the first half hour of Twilight:

Bella: *exists* Edward: 👀

If his problem was only his change of humor dear, he’s stalking you

“And if I wasn’t the hero? And if I was instead the villain?” Dramatic bitch

She didn’t actually invite him, right? PLEASE BELLA YOU HAVE HIGHER STANDARDS

✨ You are in my reserve, Bella ✨

Jacob and his friends with long hair makes me laugh

NO BUT BOTH JACOB AND EDWARD ARE TRYING TO AVOID UNCOMFORTABLE QUESTIONS AND BELLA KEEPS ASKING BECAUSE SHE’S SO CURIOUS

The guy confused by two that appear out of nowhere is the only one that look realistic and not stupid

JaMeS dO nOt pLaY wItH tHe fOoD

Anyway I’m asking myself if she’s connecting the dots with the “The Cullens disappear when there is the sun”

They should have set it in the UK.

Bella that sneaks off in a library to avoid shopping is literally me

GO BELLA, PUNCH THEM

First good thing about Edward: he pulled out of the way there guys. THEN HE TRIED TO KILL BELLA WITH HIS SHITTY DRIVING, BUT LET’S IGNORE IT

Not him “You cannot know how disgusting their thoughts were”. But do you hear yours?

“You should give me an answer” “Yeah… no…”

“I FEEL PROTECTIVE OF YOU” BUT HOW CREEPY WAS HIM WHEN HE SAID THAT? CREEPY BITCH

“I tell you that I can read minds and you think there is something wrong with you?” Sorry Bella but this time he’s right.

“Was he killed?” “Yeah… by an animal” LIAAAAAAAAAR

She connected the dots, good girl

Creepy and spinning shot

“Say what I am” A SANITARY NAPKIIIIIIIIIN (in Italian it sounds better)

“You will not hurt me”. She’s so chill with a vampire, okay girl

“They looks like diamonds” SHINE BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOOOND

Throwing a tantrum, dramatic bitch

“I am a murderer” [...] “I trust you”. Bella please

“IT’S LIKE YOU ARE MY FAVOURITE QUALITY OF HEROIN” I’M CRYING

He’s moody, not a joke. First he says he love her. Then that she should hate him. And he jumps everywhere like a grasshopper. And he’s dramatic. My god how much I don’t stand you

I’m sorry for this commentary of Twilight but it’s like reading a cringe book and I must comment every part of it. But I must go fast because everything happens fast. Also, I am waiting for Supermassive Black Hole. (I basically watched it for this song alone, Muse is my favourite band)

He’s a special child, he's the only one that can read minds.

“CAN YOU BEHAVE LIKE A HUMAN? I HAVE NEIGHBORS”. I want a book with a human and a vampire like that

Bella that is afraid she won’t be liked by Edward’s family and him like “They’re vampires. That’s your fear?”

Okay evidently they share a brain cell and you know who’s keeping it by what they say

 “What did you expect? Coffins? Dark caves? A moat?” “Not the moat” “... Not the moat.”

Anyway, Bella already has their complexion

Jasper looks like Kylo Ren

Everyone happy beside the blond one, crying

Eris is nice (Yeah it took me the whole film to understand her name was Alice, don’t mind me. Also, in italian "Alice" is pronounced different and I am stupid)

The game of graduating, oh my God. I agree with Bella, being 17 years forever sucks.

I remembered Spiderman different

“Do you trust me?” “In theory” Mood

Well the hing with the piano was cute. Robert plays it good

“I like to watch you while you sleepy” YOU GIVE ME ANXIETY BRO

But like, the simple fact that he goes into hero room - in the last two months - and nothing else- bro no

Now they’re kissing hard

“Isn’t he too old for you?” “...No?” ;););)

HE LOADED THE RIFLE TELLING BELLA TO LET IN EDWARD, I’M CRYING

The baseball match is going to start, I was waiting for this moment

There is really Supermassive Black Hole here, I’m crying

The drama of all this match

What are you? A boyband?

The gaze with which Bella watched Edward- she avenged every look he gave her during the film

He panicking so much oh my god

He did a really evil move, let’s hope it works

She’s so furious oh my god (the blond). Eris tho>>>

“BELLA YOU ARE MY WHOLE LIFE NOW” bro no

Effectively being three they could think they would have found her mother but okay

I’m intrigued, I want to see what happens now

“I do not regret the decisions that  have brought me this far [...] They also brought me to Edward” If you’re happy sis

He’s creepy but he intrigues me

The action scenes make me laugh, they look like looney tunes ones sometimes please

It’s all so dramatic. No but it’s them that are cringe, dad vampire and Eris are sensible. Also the bad guys.

They invented that she fell out of the window and she was like “typical of me”. How badly you are that such a thing is plausible?

Oh my god she fell in love badly. 

Normal life is too mainstream, what can I say

No but they paid him 20 dollars to say her that they keep an eye on her? Alright?

THEY PAID HIM TO MAKE HIM A MESSENGER, IT’S ALREADY FUNNY LIKE THIS

They just took a picture. In this version vampires are photogenic? Mhmmm

Well it’s clever to take her up and dance with her keeping her like this. Especially if she can’t dance and if she put on weight. Well, it’s a clever idea, do it more often.

Anyway “I won’t be the one who will take away you like” Drrrrrrrrama

My DrEaM iS tO aLwAyS bE WiTh yOu

I don’t believe he will bite her

In fact he did not bite her, tactic kiss on the neck

Well, they do a good couple. Shared braincell etc etc

Hi Victoria

I FINISHED IT

-

I have also commented the whole New Moon film but I don't know if I will put it here. Let's see

[rwbyvein]

Firen Lhain: Chapter 708: Chooser of the Fallen:  Part I/III

"Soooooo?" Nora asked, as she swung her legs while sitting on a crate, "Why are you guys evil?"

"What kind of question is that?" Emerald asked.

"A sincere one." Cinder said, looking Nora in the eyes. Behind her Ilia's skin changed to camouflage against the back wall.

"Not the brightest one, is she?" Mercury asked.

"You can't just?!.." Emerald tried to say, but was cut off by Nora.

"Okay, yeah, I'm not the brightest, but you know what I'm not?!" she asked, "EVIL! That's what I'm not."

"Emerald." Cinder lightly admonished.

"Bu?.." Emerald asked, looking at Mercury.

"We're not going to earn their trust by lying." Mercury stated.

Emerald looked desperately between the two, unsure of what do say.

"He's right." Cinder said to Emerald. "We have to do the most difficult thing we've ever done." Emerald looked at her with quiet, nearly panicked anticipation. "Be nice."

"And mean it!" Nora exclaimed, pointing vigorously at Emerald.

"How can we?!.." Emerald asked.

Ilia's colours moved away form the camouflage for a moment, between camouflaged and normal, "Learn to get along." Ilia said, and then nearly disappeared back in the wall.

"If you want a story?," Cinder asked, "you'll have to get me some water."

"Ha!" Nora exclaimed, pointing at Cinder, "Ironwood said the taps work!"

"You haven't tried them?!" an exascerbated Emerald asked.

"We were kind of busy..." Nora nervously said.

"Doing what?," Mercury asked Nora, "exactly?"

Ilia reverted to her ordinary colours and stepped away from the wall, "They are on their honeymoon."

"Who?" Emerald asked.

"All of them." Mercury said, laughing at what he thought was a misspoken word.

"I've got Renny." Nora said, "Jaune has..."

"the rest of them?" Cinder asked.

"Like?.." Nora asked, counting on her fingers, "all but Aurora and Ilia, and from what I heard they TRIED to join in." Once again Ilia stepped back and camouflaged against the wall.

"Aren't they?," Cinder asked as she walked towards the tap, "I don't know, jealous?"

"Renny's more than enough for me, thank you very much." Nora stated, "Though it is, like, incredible to have friends, and a home, and..."

Ilia's face reverted to normal, the rest of her skin hidden against the wall, "It's... surprisingly..."

"They LOVE each other." Nora stated, "Literally. The TOWER SHOOK!" she exclaimed, and Ilia camouflaged her face again, as Nora pantomimed grabbing the tower and shaking.

Cinder tried the tap, and it did, indeed work. "Nora?" she asked.

"Uh, yeah?" she asked.

"The tap works." Cinder stated, "Could we get some cups?"

Nora pulled out her scroll and started texting. "Okay, start talking in."

"I guess?," Cinder asked, and stepped towards her, "we'll have to... trust her. So, you want to know the deep, dark truth?"

"YES!" Nora eagerly exclaimed.

"I was offered power and took it." Cinder said with a satisfied smirk.

"That's it?" a curious Nora leaned forward and asked.

Cinder sat on the ground, "I was young, so young. I barely remember my father, other than at some point, he existed. But, I do remember my step-family."

"Was it Salem?!" Nora asked.

Ilia uncamouflaged her face to ask, "How could you?.."

"It was." Cinder said with a sultry smile.

"Called it!" Nora exclaimed.

"How could you possibly?.." Ilia tried to ask.

"It was me," Cinder stated, "my three step-sisters, and my step-mother. My existence was only allowed on the condition I work for the family. And I worked." Cinder paused, looking at Nora.

"Aanndd?.." Nora eagerly asked.

"My cup?" Cinder asked.

"I wonder what's taking them so long?" Nora asked.

* * *

Blake opened every cupboard in the kitchen, "Do we even own cups?"

Ren walked up behind her, "Aurora did say she had shopping to do."

"Mayhap?," Weiss asked, "we'll have to share."

* * *

Ruby Petal-Burst down the stairs and stopped in front of the cell. She then stepped forward, holding a single wooden cup through the cell.

"That's it?!" Emerald asked.

"Yeah, well, you see?.." Ruby nervously asked, "We don't have enough cups."

"Obviously." Ilia said, and broke her camouflage, stepping away from the wall. Ruby jumped with a start as she turned to looked at her, the cup clanging against the bars. She then jumped once again as Cinder gently pulled the cup from her hands.

"A bright one, isn't she?" Mercury sarcastically asked.

"Where did you think Ilia was?" Nora asked.

"I don't know." Ruby nervously said. "I'm not used to having guests. Prisoners? Prison guests?"

"Prison guests." Nora affirmed.

Cinder passed the cup to Emerald, "If you don't mind?"

"Of course!" Emerald adoringly said to her, and rushed over to the sink. She then passed the cup to Cinder as she sat on the floor.

"Okay, uh?," Ruby asked, "have fun?" She then Petal-Burst back up the stairs.

"How can she be so?.." Emerald tried to asked.

"Adorable, isn't she?" Cinder asked.

"Not what I was going to..." Emerald mumbled.

"She meant every word of it," Cinder said to her, "even if you did not like the way it came."

Emerald's eyes grew wide with shock.

Cinder then looked back to Nora, drinking from her cup. "Now, imagine me, but young and disheveled..."

"Imagine." Nora said, and snickered.

"What does that mean!?" Emerald shouted at her.

"It means," Nora said, "she's not as good looking as she used to be. I mean, you were like all so va-va-voom, and now you seem embarassed."

Cinder was surrounded by minor flames, but concentrated on breathing.

"Maybe there's a reason she wants to be healed?" Mercury asked.

"Pssht." Nora said.

"Pssh?!" Emerald exclaimed.

"I mean, like scars are wicked cool." Nora continued, "That's not it at all."

"Then what is it?" Mercury neutrally asked.

"I don't know?," Nora asked, "like, confience. The Grimm arm would be pretty cool if it wasn't so evil. But evil is cool, isn't it? I mean, Torchwick was pretty cool, and he was evil? Adam was like WAY evil, and he was like, wa-shooosh." she said, and mimicing Adam's Iaido draw-slash.

"Then what are you?" Mercury asked her. This caused Nora to jump up and flex her bicepts.

"Like wicked strong." Nora stated. "But, like, Cinder USED to have like a wicked-sexy dress, and a wicked sexy walk, and just exuded evil, but now she exudes..." Nora said, gesturing to Cinder sitting on the floor, "I don't know?"

"I was avoiding saying this," Mercury said to Cinder, and held his hand out. Cinder passed him the cup, which he drank deeply from, "but Cinder doesn't have the power she used to have."

"I what?" Cinder nervously asked.

"Now," Nora interjected, "she's just like angry and raspy and depressing."

"This is true." Mercury said, and took another sip from his cup. Cinder tried giving him a dealthly glare, but it didn't have the fire she used to have. "I really hate to say it."

"Then don't!" Emerald admonished.

"You don't have the fire you used to have." Mercury stated. Cinder tried to look angry at him, but ended up just looking lost. "Let's hope the healing helps with that, though, I do think it goes deeper."

[fearfulkittenwrites]

Curious

Damian Wayne/Jon Kent Fluff

Summary: Damian Wayne is an ex-assassin. Not only that, but he’s the current Robin, the only Robin every villain in Gotham is actually afraid of at first glance. So no, he doesn't have a crush. No way.

Word count: 1286

Link for it on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24889159

(I’m still figuring out the best way to post my things here on tumblr, hehe.)

Damian Wayne is an ex-assassin. Not only that, but he’s the current Robin, the only Robin every villain in Gotham is actually afraid of at first glance. Rarely seen smiling, the boy has a dark past of his own, one that he has to fight everyday to subdue. So far, he has been winning. He understands animals better than people, and that is clearly reflected in the non-existent school friendships and huge amount of adopted animals he has. Plus the ones he tried to get but didn’t get his father’s permission.

Jonathan Kent, however, was a little ray of sunshine. The young boy usually sported a big smile on his face and carried himself like everyday was the best day of his life. He was certain that if he kept a positive attitude, his day would be positive too (Damian has tried to argue that logic many times, but Jon was particularly good at not listening to him). And as Superboy, he continued to spread his good mood wherever he went.

How the two of them got so close so quickly was a mystery to both of them. Of course, Jon would still get on Damian’s nerves most times they were together, but his presence was always tolerated, no matter how bad Damian’s mood might be (The only other person who could pull off such a feat was Grayson, but in Damian’s eyes the two situations were entirely separate and completely different things).

Right now, they are in one of the Manor’s tv rooms, watching a movie they weren’t supposed to watch, with Jon’s head on Damian’s lap despite his ongoing protests.

“I don’t get it.” Jon started as a kiss took over the screen.

“Well, maybe if you sat up straight and paid attention to the events on the screen instead of spreading yourself on my lap like an animal you’d understand the development of the plot.” Damian retorted.

“No, not that, D.” Jon kept going, still not getting up. “I mean how can that feel good?”

“How can what feel good Kent?”

“That kiss!” He said, a bit exasperated. He saw that Damian had a half confused, half annoyed expression on his face, and elaborated. “It’s just... Everything is going wrong, there’s chaos everywhere and they decide to kiss. And also, how can that feel good in the more literal sense. It’s just... someone else’s mouth and I haven’t seen a scene of them brushing their teeth.” He redirected his attention to the screen “And now they’re having sex! Why?”

“You see Jonathan, when two people love each other very much...”

“Shut up.” He cut him off, sitting up and pushing the other’s face upwards. “I get that part Damian. I just don’t understand how they can think of that in a moment like this.”

“Hm. I guess it is a little illogical.”

“See? You agree with me, for once!” Jon’s gestures were a little over the top and accompanied by his usual smile. For some reason, Damian’s heart skipped a beat.

It had been doing that a lot lately.

Like whenever Jon laughed at something in that sincere way he always does, or when he uses a move Damian taught him in a battle, when he smiles at one of Damian’s pets, when he asked him something so obvious while tilting his head like a puppy, when he... Well. When Jon was around his heart tended to do that a lot. Wich was a very hard conclusion for him to come to. He wouldn’t admit anything further than that though. If someone asked (wich they didn’t, because this is Damian we’re talking about), all he would say was that his heart would skip a beat. He didn’t have a crush. He was an assassin once, of course he doesn’t have a crush. He can’t have a dumb crush on a dumb boy. Right?

“-tt-, Don’t get all excited over it Kent.” He replied “Even a broken clock is right twice a day.”

“You’re so mean D.” He complained, laying his head in the other’s lap again, causing Damian to jump a little “That’s why you don’t have any friends at school. You should try to lighten up a bit more, y’know? People are nicer than you believe they are. It’s so confusing, because you’re so kind to animals but you can’t seem to extend that to your own species, wich I think may...”

“Kent, are you going to keep talking or can I watch the movie?” Damian interrupted. Jon was a talking machine. Wich Damian used to find annoying as all hell, but now he seems almost... Amused by it. However, he still can only take it for so long.

“Humpf.” The other complained but kept quiet anyways.

...For around ten minutes.

“Hey D,” He started, looking up. “Have you ever kissed someone?”

“What kind of question is that Kent?” Damian twisted his nose, looking down at the blue eyed boy in his lap.

“The kind of question a friend asks.” Jon said “C’mon, we’ve know each other for almost a year now.”

“The answer is no.” Damian replied as Jon sat up again. “And why would you even ask that anyways? Have you ever seen me with someone?”

“No, but I was just curious.”

“About my romantic life?”

“About how kissing feels like.”

It took a while for him to realize how close he was. If he took the time, Damian could probably count every sun mark on Jon’s face. He swallowed, and the words that followed felt so foreign in his mouth that he almost thought they were not his.

“Do you want to find out?” Damian inched closer.

“I do.” Jon got closer aswell.

“With me?”

“I’d like that.”

Damian closed the gap between their mouths, pressing his lips together. They didn’t move, both afraid of messing it up, untill Jon separated the kiss.

“I think... We’re supposed to move our mouths a bit more, D.”

“O-oh, sure.” Damian cleared his throat. “Should we try again?”

“I think so, yeah.” Jon took initiative this time, sealing their lips together. He parted his ever so slightly, hoping Damian would do the same. He did, and Jon slowly raised his hand to cup the other’s face, but that startled the older boy, who broke the kiss.

“I’m sorry.” Damian said, embarassed.

“No, it’s okay.” Jon smiled at him “I should’ve known it would scare you.”

“It won’t scare me anymore.” Damian said, surging forward again and picking up where they left off. This time he wasn’t startled by Jon’s hand in his cheek. It felt nice. He moved his own hand to Jon’s face, mimicking him. He was startled, however, by the hand Jon set on his hip, breaking the kiss once again.

“Sorry.” Jon said. “I keep pushing you.”

“No, don’t, I want this is just...” He breathed in and out “I can’t handle it so well, I suppose.”

“It’s okay.” Jon reassured him. “I know you’re not big on physical contact. I don’t wanna make you unconfortable. Do you want to stop?”

“I...” Damian thought for a moment “No, but I need to. Does that makes sense?”

“Yes. Well, not really, but that’s okay. We don’t always make sense.” Jon said. “We can go just back to watching the movie.”

“That sounds good.” Damian said. After a couple minutes, he spoke again “Hey, Jon.”

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to lay down on my lap again?”

“I do. But only if you want me to.”

“Would I offer it if I didn’t want it, Kent?” Damian’s annoyed expression returned.

Jon set his head over the other’s legs again. This time, however, he could feel Damian’s hesitant hand playing with his hair.

[moonlit-manifesto]

Heartbreak Red Takeover 2020

“I’ll make your heart beat again - BA-DUMP!” - Heartbreak Red (Uduki Arata)

It’s April Fool’s Day once again, and Heartbreak Red has taken over the Tsukiuta twitter account (@tsukiuta1)! Only this time - he’s taken over some of the other Tsukino Production accounts as well! If the tweet comes from an account other than the Tsukiuta account, I’ll mark it.

Heartbreak Red responds to some fans’ tweets, and they’re mostly categorized in three ways: Advice, Request, and Other. There’s a lot of tweets, so I’ll only be translating the funny ones because some are just regular advice. There’s also some news announcements like previews of Six Gravity and Procellarum’s new unit songs and a Tsukiuta official instagram account, so check out the twitter account to see those! There’s also some audio recordings too!

Read below the cut for all the Heartbreak Red goodness!

[REQUEST] Since my school is temporarily closed, I want to be cheered up by the goddesses!!

Heartbreak Red: “Hey!! Thousand Sakura Red!! Kannaduki Otaku Red!!”

Sakura Red (Chisa from Fluna):  “Since your heart is beating again, do your best!!!”

Otaku Red (Reina from Seleas): “Do you have a favorite idol? Are you reading a fun manga!? Let’s give our hearts nourishment!!!”

------------

[REQUEST] It’s cold and rainy today, so can I get Curry Rice Genau-san to warm up my heart with a one-liner or joke?

Heartbreak Red: “Curry Redddddd!!!”

Curry Red (You from Procella): “You can only call on me once a year! Go watch the reuploaded video from last year’s April Fool’s Day!!! 💢💢💢💢

Heartbreak Red: “That was his one-liner! Sparking Curry Red!!!”

----------

[REQUEST] I want to ask if Hajime-san has been eating properly!

Heartbreak Red: “Even if you’re busy, make sure to eat enough, okay?”

Hajime: “All right. Thanks...”

Heartbreak Red: “Make sure to tell Heartbreak Purple [Hajime’s ‘Heartbreak’ alter ego] that too.”

Hajime: “...I’ll tell him. By the way, I’m not Heartbreak Purple.”

------------  

[REQUEST] Starting in April I’ll have a lot of difficult stuff going on in life, so can you and Shiki-kun cheer me on with all your strength?

Heartbreak Red: “I-It’s not Shiki-san, but...?”

Dignified Red (Shiki from SolidS): “Next year I’ll have gone around the Earth 30 times!!! And I’m still pushing on!!! I’m Dignified Red!!!!! Overcoming difficulties is a fact of life!!! Good luck!!!!”

Heartbreak Red: “Good luck~”

------------

[ADVICE] Until now, the only men I’ve dated have been good-for-nothing, and I’m afraid of falling in love again. Please tell me how to distinguish the good men from the bad men.

Heartbreak Red: “Looks like you had a thing for the hopeless ones. But you’re strong because you could tell they were hopeless! Do you have a friend you can trust? You can let them be the judge!”

------------

[REQUEST] I want to ask what’s on Chef Yoru’s menu for tonight’s dinner?

Yoru: “Katsudon!”

Heartbreak Red: “Juicy~”

-----------

[REQUEST] Does Heartbreak Gold exist?? I want to meet the shining, sparkling Heartbreak Gold (>_<)

Heartbreak Red: “Kake...Gold!!!”

Heartbreak Gold (Kakeru from Gravi): “Gold is always getting his heart broken by lady luck (bright smile).”

Heartbreak Red: “This guy turned into a twinkling star...”

----------

☆Sorry For the Intrusion☆ (@solids_info)

Heartbreak Red: “Wheeeee!!!! How are you, Blushing Red 2?”

Blushing Red 2 (Dai from SolidS): “You’re here?”

Heartbreak Red: “Now for the intro!! It doesn’t matter which Twitter account - Boundary-Free Hero Heartbreak Red presents: Account Attack!!”

---

Heartbreak Red: “Dai-chan-san, your line when I came in doesn’t fit with Blushing Red 2-san’s character, so instead we’ll replace it later and plan your entrance for then.”

Tsubasa: “Don’t try to protect your weird characters so stubbornly lol.”

Ichiru: “I [Love] Red Red will return, too... Issei will show up later.” [Ichiru doesn’t say the ‘love’ part cuz he’s embarassed lol]

Eichi: “You’re blushing (haha).”

---

Heartbreak Red: “Uhhh so, Happy April Fool’s Day!! Here’s some pork cutlets Yorurun fried. And Purple- I mean - Hajime-san told me to contact him immediately if I run into any trouble.”

Shu: “This feels like you’re on your first outside mission.”

Rikka: “Speaking of trouble, there’s a certain someone who ran out earlier...”

Shiki: “I wonder who that could be?” [it was him]

---

Dai: “Sorry for the wait.”

Issei: “Hello. Whoa, it’s Hearbreak Red-san!”

Heartbreak Red: “What’s up!”

Eichi: “This kind of sketch comedy act makes me nostalgic for those variety TV shows, haha.”

Shiki: “We’re all here now, so let’s start this thing with all of us.”

Rikka: “Yeah, let’s do it! I’ve actually been looking forward to this.”

Heartbreak Red: “Time for the SQ edition!”

------------

[REQUEST - SQ] Humidity makes my hair messy... What should I do? I need Rikka-san’s advice!! Also, is Shiki-san’s hair still smooth as usual? Lol

Rikka: “When you wash your hair, make sure to properly dry it. You’ll notice a difference the next day. Don’t just leave it half-wet, okay? Using hair care products will yield greater results, too! And Shiki... His hair is so smooth today that I’m angry.”

Shiki: “What can I say, I’m Mr. Smooth Hair Cuticles #1.”

Heartbreak Red: “I’m #2.”

Rikka: “I’m jealous~ (haha).”

------------

[ADVICE - SQ] There’s a 20cm height difference between me and the person I like! And I’m taller! I hate guys...  ( ;ᯅ; )

Shiki: “No need for that, I think that’s cool. Believe in yourself. The person you like will realize it’s cool, too.”

Heartbreak Red: “It’s a gift from the heavens. I hope the person you like will like you back!”

------------

[OTHER - SQ] Ichiru-kun♥ I love you ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Everyone: “Awwww!!!”

Ichiru: “Be quiet, all you adults!!!! But thank you for your message! I’m super happy! I’ll continue to do my best!”

-----------

[REQUEST - SQ] Heartbreak Red, what do you think of Dignified Red?

Shiki: “Yeah, let’s hear it! Not that I’m Dignified Red or anything!!”

Heartbreak Red: “He has an amazing force, I’m jealous. And to possess such a grand presence really is the meaning of dignified. Dignified Red’s calm aura is so cool.”

------------

[REQUEST - SQ] Rikka-san!!! Rikka-saaaaaan!! What has made you smile recently?

Rikka: Yoru-kun’s delicious fried pork cutlet made me smile~ I now have a great, big smile on my face ♪”

Dai: “...Just hurry up and finish it.”

Heartbreak Red: “I like you ‘cause you eat until you’re full.”

------------

[OTHER - SQ] Issei-kun, are you enjoying university life?? The juniors are growing up and your horizons are expanding.

Issei: “Thank you for your message! They haven’t decided whether or not to start a new semester [due to current events, aka the corona virus], but me being impatient won’t help anything. I’ll happily wait for a decision (haha).”

------------

[REQUEST - SQ] I haven’t seen much interaction between Okui Tsubasa and Kagurazaka Soushi even though their image colors are both yellow. I’d like to hear a conversation between them. Please help with this, Heartbreak Red~ [originally requested on the Tsukiuta account, but he’s answering it on the SQ account]

Heartbreak Red: “I’m a man of my word, so I called Soushi over.”

Soushi: “Now that I’m here, let’s talk, Tsubasa-san.”

Tsubasa: “This somehow seems forced lolol, but sure let’s talk.”

Soushi: “Then let’s find something to do instead. Like a dance lesson or something.”

Tsubasa: “Oh, yeah. Did you know there’s a dance lesson day organized by the office? People who want to practice on their own, regardless of unit, can go.”

Soushi: “And you’re a kind senpai who treats people to things like ramen afterwards, right~?”

Tsubasa: “What an indirect way to ask for that lolol. Since you have such a big body, I’ll treat you.”

Soushi: “That’s a weird reason (lol). And I hear you always treat Dai-chan-san to things?”

Tsubasa: “That’s because Dai-chan is an eternal little brother!”

Dai: “This turned into such an embarrassing conversation...”

Rikka: “Your ears are red, Dai (haha).”

Heartbreak Red: “That’s all for the yellows’ talk!”

------------

Heartbreak Red: “And so, time is up!!! I’ll be taking my leave now, SQ~!!

Shiki: “He really blew in and out just like the wind (ah, youth)...  What a ‘chill dude’ (ah, youth)...”

Tsubasa: “Shiki, don’t try to use young people slang... (but he sure is a chill dude)”

Shu: “What a crazy time this session was...”

------------

Heartbreak Red: “Pool of Blood-kun is in his green forest. Blushing Red-kun has returned to the sky... Actually that sounds morbid, so let’s say he returned to the bottom part of the blue sky. To everyone here except Ryou-kun and Ren-kyun who are in the middle of changing clothes right now: Happy April Fool’s Day!!”

Koki: “Happy April Fool’s! I’ve been looking forward to this, haha.”

Sora: “We’ve been waiting-!”

------------

[He’s now infiltrated the ALIVE twitter account (@aliveinfo1)]

Heartbreak Red: “Now that I’m here, you know what that means, right? Let’s get to it!”

Nozomu: “Yeah, let’s do it!!”

Kensuke: “Answering real questions and giving advice in a rapid-fire setting is a test of idol power. I’ll do my best!”

Morihito: “I wonder what kind of messages we’ll get.”

------------

[OTHER - ALIVE] Kou-kun, how is your mother doing? (From: a fan of your mom)

Koki: “I didn’t even know my mom had fans (haha). Thank you on behalf of my family. She is doing just fine.”

Heartbreak Red: “This morning my mom left me this supportive message: ‘Red, do your best!’ If you could see it, it would be so embarrassing.”

Koki: “I’m sure (haha).”

-----------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] I love Pool of Blood Red-san so so much. From morning til night, I long to be a tomato crushed and eaten by him. Please, please, please let me be your tomato...!

Ryota: “I’m not Pool of Blood Red [yes he is], but I’ll tell him that for you... You want to be eaten?”

Heartbreak Red: “!!”

------------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] When Heartbreak Red and Nozomu-kun are together, what are some common things you say? I’m curious about what happens when the two energies meet!

Heartbreak Red: “Wheeee~”

Nozomu: “Whee-whee~”

Heartbreak Red: “Weh?”

Nozomu: “Ooweh-ooweeeh~”

Heartbreak Read & Nozomu: “Wheeeeeeeee~ lololol”

------------

[INQUIRY - ALIVE] What does everyone in ALIVE wear to sleep?!

Heartbreak Red: “I am a capable man, so I will gather this information!!”

☆Everyone’s Sleepwear☆

Those in sweats or activewear: Sora, Soushi, Nozomu, Kensuke, Mamoru

Those in Gelato Pique [brand name of luxury sleepwear]: Ryota

Those in pajamas: Morihito, Ren, Koki

------------

[OTHER - ALIVE] Who is the strongest in ALIVE?

Heartbreak Red: “Time to answer with your physical skills! Let’s go!”

Everyone: “Roger!”

~ Please Hold ~

[sometime later]

Soushi: *victorious pose*

Kensuke: “Ryou’s inability to laugh makes him strong in a different sense, but this competition wasn’t about making people laugh.”

Ryota: *annoyed*

------------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] Mamoru-san, tell us about something that happened recently!

Mamoru: “I was thirsty at night, so I had some half-finished water bottle by my bedside. When I woke up in the morning, my face was drenched...!!”

Heartbreak Red: “I’ve never woken up to having water splashed on me, but I feel your pain.”

------------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] Sakuraba-san, please show us your ‘dere’ [lovey] side...!!

Ryota: “One can’t just be ‘told’ to be dere... Did you forget? (laughs)”

Heartbreak Red: “An extra-large serving of dere-------”

------------

[OTHER - ALIVE] Sora-kun! Have you gotten any taller?!

Heartbreak Red: “Good question!!! As a matter of fact!!! They were going to make an announcement later, but!!! All of the official websites will be updating everyone’s height measurements to reflect this year!!!!

Sora: “The results will be online!!!!! (teary-eyed)”

------------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] I want to be charismatic like Nozomu-kun! Please tell me three things I can do to be charismatic!

Nozomu: “#1: Believe in yourself! #2: Believe in those around you!! #3: Make an effort to have faith!! That’s all!”

Heartbreak Red: “Those are all good points!”

------------

[REQUEST - ALIVE] What color is everyone’s lucky underwear?

Soushi: “Mine are black. But that’s because of the color of our stage outfits (SOARA’s costumes are white).”

Ren: “Uh... well...”

Heartbreak Red: “My lucky underwear is red of course! I’m sure all of these ‘sky’ and ‘forest’ people have cool colors, too. Well, if I’m the one saying it then it’s probably true (haha).”

Ren: *relieved he doesn’t have to answer*

------------

Heartbreak Red: “That’s all the time I’ve got!! To all of you sky and forest dwellers - I’ll be taking my leave~!!

Kensuke: “Thank you, Heartbreak Red---!!!”

Sora: “Good luck out there---!!!”

Soushi: “Feel free to abduct me again.”

Morihito: “Soushi (haha). Thank you very much, Heartbreak Red.”

Mamoru: “I had fun!”

------------

☆Red Went Back Home☆

Heartbreak Red: “Now that I’ve accomplished my missions, I’m back home. Happy April Fools Day, everyone! I want to end this at home. By the way, I think I’ll be able to do some ‘Account Attacks’ that I couldn’t do this time around sometime later in April. I hope you all look forward to it~

My last audio greeting is just my final thoughts, haha. Alrighty! Thanks for a wonderful April Fools!! Until next time!”

[ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is]

could you please help type me? im 22 and most everything i will mention will be recent. i am a slow learner where i need the entirety of information for anything to make sense at all. ie i didn't understand fe-fi for a year before i saw one single sentence on your blog and i heard a clicking sound in my head. before that i was on point 0 no matter what. problem is the opposite is also correct where i am convinced i know something but i read one sentence and go 'i didn't know anything at all apparently' when i read that one sentence on your blog i started studying everything from scratch.(1)

it actually gave me a weird anxiety where i genuinly shut off for a while and couldn't concentrate on anything but trying to understand the functions. the more i couldn't understand it, the more i ignored everything else. i pretty much stopped sleeping at some point. but when i decide on something somehow everything feels related to that and i'm like 'ah finally i will know some peace'. this is a very bad explanation but yeah. certain things i think genuinly feel like an attempt of me finding 'relevant things' so i can convince myself, which is why i came to you for help because at this point i have no idea, and the confusion is angering me.(2)

one of my worst qualities is scolding people, specifically for how they behave. i do this a lot where i think you have to behave a certain way in certain situations, you must. i'm trying to work on myself but i genuinly feel like certain things are just inappropriate to the point where i Must interfere, which is something everyone around me hates. i have a tendency to believe that I just know how it must be, so i explain to people how they must be acting. 'you do this which makes people feel like this, which will result in this'is a constant in my life. i also feel second hand embarassment from pretty much anything.(3)

i think my sensing function is last because it genuinly feels like i cannot see. feels kind of dissociative sometimes, like i'm not there. i am completely seperate from the outside world and to some extent, from myself. moreso environment tho. although i cannot always understand that i actually have a body. that has needs. i don't ever realize i'm cold, for example, until someone tells me my hands are freezing. even then its more a fact then me actually realizing im cold. people also ask me if i'm ok a lot because i just straigh up look like i'm not there at all. (4)

i'm completely lost on the n function, i thought i had ne because i explain things as other things a lot, so that to me was ne. i just cannot explain something without giving an example of something else that is completely irrelevant, which sounds like absolute gibberish apparently. like, feathers? protection. enneagram 3? rafiki and simba, for some fucking reason. and i honest to god wouldn't have understood ennea 3 if it wasn't for 'rafiki holding simba up is 3s inferiority complex. the zebras bowing is the superiority complex. they will do anything to avoid simba, the inferiority feelings, so they bow down, as in whatever simba says goes just so they can live. the shadow simba cannot go is their denied shame.' otherwise i cannot understand it.(5)

more things: i am a massive hoarder of things i don't want. books are the number one things tho i hoard pretty much anything. i love reading but most i read is things i dont care about. i have over 800 books and most is things i buy because i see sth and my immidiate reaction is 'some random stranger on the street will question me on this 4 years later' so i buy books. i think, 'if i do not know this, i will straight up die.' i do not interact with people unless i know for sure i can like, talk about Anything that has ever existed, ever.(6)

im prone to many identity crisises and i overthink. i also am constantly swayed from actual interests i have. i make long lists of what to read or where to go and 0 percent of it is based on what i want. it's just me thinking i don't know much history so i should visit every museum and i don't know science so i should read every book etc. i decided to learn guitar and i have barely touched it because i'm learning music theory first aswell as the entire history of rock music and i have to memorize every chord before i am allowed to touch the guitar itself. same thing happened with drawing. with violin. even when im dressing i'm like 'what if someone asks me if i know enough about this band and i dont so then i have to move countries???' so i do not wear it. i get actual stomachaces lol. (7)

i am not competitive but also feel embarassed a lot. i won't put myself forth and usually want to not be seen but i also get offended if someone is better then me, specifically in a field of my knowledge. if i meet someone who has similar interests/knowledge as me i ignore them or the topic for fear that they might know more then me. i hate change unless it is controlled. like sudden news or travel plans are a nightmare and they cause a lot of anxiety but i also am okay with changing things up if i am in complete control of how it will go. that seems to be it. thanks. (8)

--------------------------

Hi anon,

So this isn’t limited to you but whenever people are like “my anxiety over typing myself has genuinely impacted my quality of life” it is something that makes me want to stop typing that person. It feels like I’m enabling a habit that is explicitly not good for them, and it shows up to an extent that is frankly alarming and I really, really hope it is exaggeration and that me saying this will shut it the fuck down in questions that I get. Based on some of the other things you’ve said, if you have not gotten assessed for anxiety you probably should have someone check that out (and if you have, I would spend time working on it and take a break from typology in the meantime), and that makes it pretty much impossible for me to type your enneagram, but I can still do MBTI although the anxiety makes it difficult to determine extroversion and introversion.

With that out of the way, probably one of the xNFJs:

Scolding people is often high Fe behavior, and especially in the way you describe it (as based in how other people will feel about the behavior). It’s difficult to assess beyond that without explanations; scolding people over something like racism is hopefully something a decent person of any type can get behind, whereas scolding people over many other things is just Fe. Based on what you said about needing to be control over changes and this idea of needing total understanding of anything before engaging with it also really does not sound in line with perceiving, which often thrives when jumping in without total preparation.

Either of the intuition functions would see things as other things and tend to engage via metaphor and theme, and the other things you mention as evidence of low sensing seem appropriate for high Ni as well.

[ameliyaahn3]

🖇 hello!! assassination classroom matchup, (any male character) please!

― i’m a female and a grey asexual! people find me intimidating the first time they see me, but i’m really not that intimidating. i’m somewhere in between an intj-t and an entj-t. i’m a slytherin, and my enneagram is 3w4. i’m kind of an oikawa kinnie/dazai kinnie lol.

― appearance-wise, i’m 165cm (5’4"), asian, with shoulder length black hair and dark brown eyes! i don’t like wearing dresses, often times i’m wearing long sleeves paired with shorts or jeans.

― personality-wise, i can be cold and really blunt at first and i don’t let people in easily bc trust issues™ at the rare times people actually succeed in making me their friend, i’m a bit chaotic. i’m a rational person (which sometimes offend others??), but i can be very childish at times. i have pretty dry and dark humor, and i love making sarcastic comebacks. it’s literally second nature at this point. i’m a vv moody & have a short temper. people say i’m iNtElLiGeNt, and so naturally, i’m the person my classmates go to for academic help, despite being super harsh when they get something wrong. (i can’t help it bc what i teach them usually seems easy to me ;-;"). and sometimes i’m just so done with everyone’s shit that i don’t care about anything HHHHH it’s like i have two separate personalities??

― i like horror, psychological thrillers, action & action comedies. i’m very interested in psychology & pathology, and i want to be a psychologist or a forensic psychologist one day. i love spicy food and have a sweet tooth! (ill eat literally ANYTHING sweet) i also prefer working alone than in groups, bc i do better alone. i love foxes & cats too! (i have a cat named ginger eEEE) i also really love collecting stationery!!

― i hate crowds & socializing. i’d prefer staying in and binge watching anime or movies! despite being the person people come to for academic help, i absolutely hate studying and rarely ever do study.

― my hobbies are writing, drawing, playing the piano, violin & guitar and singing! at a young age i’ve been taught how to play those instruments, but i’m only really good at piano. the life of an asian lol

thank you ❤

A/N : I can't believe how similar we are like...??? It's almost like I did a matchup for myself ? So I'm pretty sure about everything I've wrote ? Scary.

Assasination classroom >>>

I match you with...

Asano Gakushuu

If peoples are intimidated by you the first time, this guy wasn't afraid one second and I believe that it was the same in the other sense.

You two just fear nothing in this world... okay maybe Asano is scared of his father and you can't trust peoples.

Daddy issues ™ x Trust issues ™.

But you two still at least "sociables" person and were pretty quickly interested in each other despite that you tried to not make it look like it.

He is tall for his age, good looking, intelligent, multi-talented... and such a cold bastard but its just a personality traits like another one for peoples like us.

And you are an individualist, multi-talented, intelligent and kind of tomboyish girl too, traits that all together aren't very usual to Asano in the other hand. He just know one guy like that, and he's probably the one he hates the most. Karma.

Then you know what does it mean already, here begin your ennemies to lovers romance !

If you two are very smart students, the existance of each other was disturbing as your opinion about school, studying and all were different.

I assume that you would be an A-class student and as one, Asano would pay attention to if you do your homework in time but you just don't need that and you maked him clearly understand ?

But who's the school president ? He's superior to you! How dare you ?

And here we go again : another fight, who would win this time ? You're naturally talented for comeback and a funny person, he's polite but don't hesit to go really hard just to shut your mouth. He loves your lips.

Asano don't pity you at all and even laugh at you when he see how much you don't like crows and peoples in general and prefer to be alone, watching anime and movies.

But makes fun of you less about it with time and try to help you a little bit, not too much cause he want you only for him.

Also because despite being a more sociable person, Asano isn't funny and is worst than you about build strong bonds : he just use peoples.

He hates and loves your academic facilities cause thank to them you manage to keep up with him but he can't study with you in an 100% academic way.

But I think that the worst thing for him is that because of them you're able to give him advices sometimes about how he should lead the school and that you can make him question himself about his own perfect methods !

This bitch critics almost everything you do : piano, guitar, writing and violin just because he's better than you and makes you feel it.

Just don't show him your stories/texts or this will be his writing and don't try to be a better guitarist than him cause this will never happen.

But don't be sad cause he respects you singing and drawing, Gakushuu don't even dare to say bad about them except if this is objective, he also likes your interest for psychology, often asking for your knowledge randomly and in fact you're the leader here.

Yeah, you're the one in control, you just let Asano believe he's dom. This guy is so embarassed and ignorant about love, feelings but act like he's confident.

You're mostly in charge of physical touch.He hates to feel weak, can't assume his desire for you, he's just messy about it! You're the only one person he's totally honest with.

Spoil you when he think you deserves it only... well that's what he want to believe : He don't know how to show his love properly so he do what he can -> he don't understand the concept of love language as he can't believe he's a giver and that he just can't identify to them.

Asano isn't interested in animals but do efforts with Ginger, not very difficult as he is a cat person.

Your family will loves him, unfortunately his father won't like you.

Slytherin x slytherin, 3w4 x 3w4, so similar but so different too, you should consider potentialy being an entp.

Can't assume to like when you're chaotic, he complain about it but it does have positive effect on him.

He's never offended with whatever you may say, he's captivated by your reflexions and ideas. Lips

His kiss are surprisingly passionate, sometimes is having a hand in your shoulder while talking, he often touch your back and when he feel confident he takes your hand in public.

Others potential match :

The Reaper, Itona Horibe

[lwjstiletto]

wangxian au where lwj is a popular hand model and wwx is an independent jewellery maker [Part 3]

[Part 1] [Part 2]

wwx shuts himself in his workshop for a month straight, with lwj being his only visitor. everything he makes looks beautiful on lwj but it’s somehow not enough, not quite /deserving/ of lwj yet.

when he tells lwj this, he only gets a slight downturn of his lips in return.

“you have fine craftsmanship.” lwj says, turning his hand so that the lights bounce off the crystal encrusted hand chain. “i have never seen anything like it before.”

wwx watches him in stunned silence. lwj tends to drop these really sincere, heartfelt compliments that both embarass him and motivate him to show lwj he can do even better. another reason for his stunned silence is how ethereal lwj looks in jewellery

wwx wants to cover him in it. a nice jade pendant that hangs just above his bellybutton; a hairpiece that weaves flowers between the silky black strands of his hair; a thick banded crystal choker that sits around his throat just so; an anklet with teardrop pearls perhaps

but for now, he has to work up to making the hand jewellery suitable. the rest can wait

—•—

the next time lwj visits, he looks like he’s one blink away from sleeping where he stands.

“lan zhan,” wwx says, because they have somehow progressed to calling each other by their infromal names, “are you okay?”

“mn.” lwj says, then almost collapses mid-blink. in true rom-com fashion, wwx catches him with one hand around his waist and the other on his arm. he would tease lwj about it but this isn’t the time.

“i’m sorry.” lwj tries to straighten up.

“come on, you need to sleep.” wwx says, using his hold on lwj’s waist to guide him towards his bedroom.

“no sleep.” lwj says, planting his feet into the ground much like jin ling does when he wants to be stubborn.

“lan zhan,” wwx cajoles with his practiced baby voice, “come on. you’re tired. just nap for one hour.”

lwj glares at him, “sleep later, work now.”

wwx bends down and puts a hand under lwj’s knees, scooping him up before he can react.

lwj’s sleepy eyes widen, “wei ying!”

“if you’re gonna act like a child,” wwx says walking towards the bedroom, “then expect me to treat you like one.”

internally, wwx is panicking. he is definitely crossing some boundaries here. however, wwx considers lwj a friend and his friend looks like he hasn’t slept for a week. sometimes extreme measures are necessary, jc has taught him that.

lwj twitches in his arms when he reaches his bedroom door.

“you can put me down now.” he says, his voice weak.

wwx ignores him and kicks his door open, gently placing lwj on the bed once he reaches it.

“go to sleep.” he says, pulling the duvet over him, “if you dare come out before the hour is up, i can and will carry you back.”

lwj looks like he wants to protest but he seems to lose the fight with exhaustion and drifts off the sleep before wwx’s eyes. wwx quickly exits the bedroom and closes the door behind himself. lwj. is. in. his. bed. sleeping... he’s sleeping. because he’s tired. and wwx’s friend.

“jiang cheng, lan zhan is in my bed.” he says into his phone once he has shut himself in his workshop.

“xichen’s brother? why? did you kidnap him? tell me you didn’t wei wuxian. xichen will kill you.” jc says.

“ok first of all, he’s here for work.” wwx realises that between working and sleeping he has forgotten to inform anyone about this. “and he was tired. he looked so sleepy and cute, what could i do?”

“you... was he at least... coherent? it was consensual right?” jc asks

“what?!” wwx screeches, standing up in indignation. “jiang cheng oh my god. we- he’s TAKING A NAP!”

“oh thank god.” jc sighs, “wait how do you know lan wangji?”

“ah,” wwx scratches his nose, “long story short, remember that pretty guy from uni? yeah lan zhan and him, same guy.”

“you-“ jc sighs deeply, “i’ve been hearing you wax poetic about lan wangji’s hands?! how will i ever look xichen in the eyes after knowing that you probably- eugh i hate you.”

“ok first of all, it’s not a fetish-“

jc hangs up on him.

this leaves wwx with too much free time to think and that’s never a good thing. so he starts looking around for something to do. this is how his eyes fall on lwj’s gloves lying on the table beside the door. lwj has developed a habit of discarding them as soon as he comes in

and like a magnet, wwx feels drawn to them. it must be annoying for lwj to wear them all the time, but he never complains. wwx, however, has no such qualms and detests them with vigor

today, it’s the white leather gloves. wwx picks one up and examines it. it’s soft to the touch, worn out to smoothness. an idea strikes him and he tosses the glove back as he reaches for his sketchbook. he thinks he has finally got it.

—•—

when lwj wakes, there is light coming through the curtains. he doesn’t remember the last time he had such a comfortable, dreamless sleep. an unfamiliar but pleasant scent surrounds him, safe, warm.

lwj bolts up in bed, remembering exactly where he is. he looks at his phone. it’s six, ok that’s fine. wait... 6AM. lwj throws the covers off and looks around, then back at his phone as if that’s going to change something.

he spent the night at wwx’s place. speaking of, where did wwx sleep then? he ventures outside and sees nobody in the living area. sure enough, wwx is passed out in his workshop, cheek flat on his workbench.

lwj sighs.

“wei ying.” he prods his shoulder gently, “wake up.”

wwx groans and shakes him off, “go away.”

after a few more pokes lwj rules it a lost cause and decides to make tea for himself and coffee for wwx. thankfully, he doesn’t have work until 3pm so he has plenty of time to waste puttering around wwx’s sparce kitchen.

after finding only hot sauce in the top cupboards (one labelled ‘burning hot’ with flames on the cover which makes him cringe away) he finally finds coffee. no tea. it’ll have to do, he thinks.

the smell of coffee near his nose does a better job at waking wwx up. he reaches blindly for the cup before he even blinks his eyes open. ridiculous.

lwj, in the most dignified way possible, sits on the purple beanbag and waits as wwx’s brain reboots with every sip of coffee.

“lan zhan?” wwx asks.

“i have the same question.” lwj says, “why am i still here?”

“too philosophical for this early in the morning. what time even is it?” wwx looks at the wall clock and groans, “why are you awake?”

lwj gives him a blank look, “i was promised a nap.”

“yeah, yeah.” wwx brushes him off, “i’m happy you slept well, you look much better than before.”

lwj feels his ears burn and his heart rate quicken.

wwx has an ease to his words and actions that makes lwj agreeable to existing in his space without wanting to revert back to professionalism. he fears that one day he’ll become so comfortable that he wouldn’t want to leave

“come here.” wwx beacons.

once lwj is bent over his shoulder, he shows him the rough sketches he has been working on all night apparently.

“are those..”

“inspired by the bane of my existence, none other than your gloves!” wwx says proudly.

“why do you hate the gloves?” lwj asks, curious.

wwx gives him a complicated look, “because they’re fabric. how old and boring. wouldn’t you rather be tangled in crystal chains that you can’t wear or remove without help?”

lwj lets him dodge the question, then gives the designs a closer look. “they’re very interesting.”

“it’s just a rough sketch.” wwx refuses to look at him, “i’ll refine the details and start working on it by tomorrow.”

“mn.” lwj says.

—•—

“da-ge tried to beat up su she again.” nhs informs him when he gets to his office a few hours later.

“again?” lwj asks.

“he bumped into him at the lobby. again.” nhs sighs.

“i will speak to him.” lwj says.

“what? no these stalkers just get worse-“

“i meant nie mingjue.” lwj clarifies.

“it should be fine. i’ve banned him from office premises now and i’m working on filing a restraining order against him.” nhs says, “i tried to explain this to da-ge but you know his temper. actually maybe you should talk to him. he might listen to you.”

lwj nods, “i will call him after my shoot.”

—•—

nhs must have mentioned it to nmj because he’s there to pick lwj up after his shoot. it’s late, almost past eleven, and the parking lot is half empty.

lwj gets a text from wwx just before he gets in the car.

wei ying: garnet or emerald?

lwj replies: i’m no expert at this

wei ying: lan zhannnn humour me

lwj: ruby

wei ying: i will fossilise you in one. lan zhannnn be serious

“you look much more at ease.” nmj comments.

lwj realises that he is.

“you don’t need to bother with su she anymore. huaisang has it under control.” lwj says.

nmj gives him a skeptical look.

“i trust him.” lwj emphasises.

“i was told you had previous acquaintance with that man.” nmj says.

lwj sighs, “he was in my cello class.”

“you play the cello?” nmj asks.

“not anymore.” lwj answers.

nmj doesn’t ask further.

they sit in uncomfortable silence until nmj asks where he should drop lwj off. what comes out of his mouth are the directions to wwx’s place. his excuse: he needs to know what a garnet gem is before making a decision.

“i will trust you and huaisang to handle this.” nmj says when they come to a stop, “be well.”

lwj nods, then opens the car door.

“wangji.” nmj’s hand grabs his elbow gently.

lwj turns to him.

“i’d like for us to be friends.” nmj says. it sounds stilted, amended.

lwj frowns, “i already consider you one.”

nmj nods and lets go of his hand. with the hint of a smile he says, “goodnight wangji.”

lwj looks at nmj drive away then turns to face wwx’s apartment building. now that he’s here, his excuse sounds feeble. he takes a deep breath, he’s already here. might as well.

wwx opens his apartment door and stares at lwj like he has seen a ghost. “lan zhan?”

“i don’t know what garnet looks like.” lwj says.

wwx grins at him, then grabs his forearm, dragging him into his workshop. there, on a mannequin hand, is the half finished skeleton of what looks like wwx’s design coming to life. he holds up a red and a green stone. he points to the red one, “this is a garnet.”

“it looks like a ruby.” lwj says

wwx looks like he goes through the seven stages of grief before he says, in a strangled voice, “how could you? you’re– you’re messing with me again, aren’t you?”

lwj gives him an innocent look. he can feel the tension in his shoulders bleed out.

“it’s coming together.” wwx says when he notices lwj looking at his unfinished project. “come here, let me see if you can have mobility with it on.”

lwj removes his gloves and stretches his hand towards wwx. wwx gently manoeuvring delicate silver chains around his hand isn’t something new, but it feels different in the middle of the night. more intimate. lwj discards that word with a flick of his hair

it’s not usual for him to leave it unpinned, but he has spent the day lying on a carpet with his hands stretched upwards, balancing a small perfume bottle between his fingers. coming out of it with a few strands out of place is a minor inconvenience.

“tada!” wwx says, drawing lwj’s attention to his right hand which is now tangled in a complicated-looking array of chains from the tips of his fingers down to his wrist. it’s stunning even in its incomplete form.

“it’s beautiful.” lwj says, low as the silent night.

“it’s barely anything right now!” wwx protests but his cheeks are red, “come on, try to move your fingers.”

lwj does, slowly as to not break the delicate structure in case it does lack mobility. it moves with him, like still water disturbed, pressing coldness onto his skin when he closes his fist.

there is no bite, in fact it barely feels any different from wearing light cotton gloves. he thinks he understands wwx’s vision better now. he opens his fist again, one finger at a time, watching how the chains loosen and hang lower on his wrist.

he’s so fascinated by it that he’s surprised to see wwx standing in front of him when he looks up. his eyes are fixed on lwj, unwavering and shameless in their focus, dark with what lwj would presume was desire if he didn’t know better.

“ah it doesn’t need adjustments for now then!” wwx says, snapping out of it. “it looks great on you! i’m sure your girlfriend will like it when it’s finished too!”

“i’m gay.” lwj deadpans.

“oh.” wwx says, choked. “your... boyfriend then?”

“wei ying i...” think of you as a safe haven in my hectic life? find your rambling amusing? think you’re extremely talented and deserve success? have a teeny tiny crush on you? what is lwj supposed to say? each of those sound worse than the one before

at the end he decides to settle for the worst possible answer, “i don’t have time for a boyfriend.”

he does! well, not really. but he would make time if it was wwx... or something! sometimes lwj wants to punch a wall, break a finger, quit his job as a consequence and live in a secluded mountain in the east for the rest of his days. this is one of those moments.

wwx nods in understanding. lwj would prefer if he /didn’t/ understand and demanded to be lwj’s boyfriend to prove him wrong. ‘i’ll make you have time for a boyfriend’ is what lwj imagines him saying.

instead wwx offers him tea.

“it’s too late for coffee.” he shrugs when lwj mumbles a surprised ‘tea?’

before lwj can ask why he suddenly has tea in his house when he didn’t just yesterday, wwx is already gone.

they sit around wwx’s small breakfast table. as they sip their tea- high quality tea nonetheless- wwx begins to talk.

“this project is going more smoothly than i expected. i already have a couple designs in my mind. i’d say it’d take maybe a month or so if i substitue my sleep enough with coffee.” wwx says.

“do not strain yourself.” lwj replies.

“rich coming from you.” wwx’s lip quirks, “you passed out on me yesterday. oh what could have caused that? i don’t think it was sleep deprivation and overworking because you’d never do that.”

it feels like lwj is being scolded.

“wei ying-“

“lan zhan, are you alright?” wwx asks sincerely, “i know you said that you weren’t hurt back then when i saw your bruises, but we weren’t friends back then. you were in pain when i met you at wen ning’s parlour. -

- wen qing was oddly iffy about telling jiang cheng about you even though she knows that he’s friends with your brother. you looked so afraid when you thought i was stalking you, which, technically my fault but still. i’m sorry for bringing this up but i’m worried about you. i want to help you, with whatever it is.”

lwj sits in silence for a few moments, flabbergasted. it seems like this is genuinely bothering wwx, and maybe it has for a while now.

“wei ying.” lwj starts, trying to mentally arrange it all in chronological order. “i think there has been a slight misunderstanding. i did not persue conventional modelling because i did not want to be in the public eye.

however, my identity was exposed about a month ago. it made me unnecessarily paranoid which is why wen qing was careful about my information, and i was in turn careful about my surroundings.”

“who the hell-“

“it does not matter now.” lwj says calmingly. he doesn’t need another person trying to beat su she up.

wwx fumes silently as lwj continues.

“at wen ning’s parlour i was actually in quite a bit of pain.” lwj says. wwx opens his mouth but lwj cuts him off. “yes, it was due to overwork, and yesterday can be attributed to the same cause. but it does not happen as often as you’re thinking, i promise.”

wwx mulls this over. “ok fine. don’t think i didn’t notice you skipped over the bruises though. they can’t be from overwork so either someone did that to you or-“

“it is..” lwj says, forcing the words out, “as you thought that day.”

he wouldn’t admit this to anyone, but he doesn’t want wwx to have any misconceptions. and well, if he sacrifices his own peace of mind for wwx, it is most likely worth it in the end.

“you mean...” wwx swallows, “you–“

seeing him struggle so much with the words makes it easier for lwj to blurt them out somehow.

“i like restraints, yes.”

this does not bring an end to the conversation, instead making wwx stutter through even worse versions of it.

“you like– to be tied up– oh my god.” he says, “you- that’s what you meant right? handcuffs, ropes all that- like bdsm? is that what–“

“wei ying. please.” lwj says.

“oh of course. here.” wwx grabs both his wrists with one hand.

lwj stares at him. wwx stares back. what the hell.

...

“oh,” wwx draws back like has been burned, “oh my god i don’t know why i did that. i’m so sorry!”

“wei ying it’s okay.” lwj tries but wwx has now put his face in his hands and does not seem to hear him above his mumbling variations of ‘oh my god’ and ‘i’m so sorry’.

lwj lets him go on for a while before he can’t take it anymore. he puts a gentle hand on wwx’s shoulder. this seems to have the desired effect, both shutting wwx up and making him look up at lwj.

“wei ying, it’s okay.” he repeats.

“no it’s not! what was i even thinking? it’s not okay for me to do that! out of nowhere! god, i must have made you so uncomfortable–“

“i don’t mind.” lwj says.

“how can you not? you should fire me!”

“you are my employer.”

“that’s even worse!”

lwj sighs. wwx seems to be transforming into a puddle of shame right before him. he has to put an end to this or wwx will overthink himself into an early grave. no amount of consoling seems to work though. lwj sighs, it is time for drastic measures.

“i lied.” lwj says. he quickly continues before wwx can officially begin his pity party, “i do have time for a boyfriend.”

“what.” wwx says, drawn out of his stupor with the sudden shift in topic.

“i have time... if it’s you.” lwj says and then immediately wants to adapt wwx’s head in hands coping mechanism. “now we are even.”

wwx seems to be dissecting his sentence to make sense of it. “oh. OH.”

“i should go home.” lwj rises from his chair. just as he is turning away, wwx grabs his wrist and pulls him so he’s face-to-face with him.

“lan zhan,” wwx says, his eyes fond, “you’re so.. ugh!”

lwj frowns. ugh. he’s ugh.

“lan zhan!” wwx takes lwj’s face between his palms and grins at him, “do you know i’ve been crushing on you since that day at the university?”

“you have?” lwj asks.

“you really didn’t know?” wwx asks, “lan zhan, lan zhan, do you think a professional jeweller needs weekly fitting appointments?”

“you don’t?” lwj feels just a little stupid.

“not really? i could have made adjustments after i finished everything.”

“you like me?” lwj asks. for some reason it hadn’t occurred to him that his crush could be reciprocated.

“yes!” wwx shifts from one foot to another eagerly, “can i hug you now?”

lwj nods and is drawn into wwx’s arms. wwx presses his nose into the space between lwj’s neck and shoulder. lwj holds his shoulders, glad that he can hide his red face in wwx’s hoodie

wwx sighs, his breath tickles on lwj’s skin.

“will you stay with me tonight?” and when lwj is silent for two seconds,

“not like that! it’s innocent! like a sleepover! i won’t tie you up i promise– lan zhan please shut me up i beg you–“

lwj draws back, simply places a gentle kiss on wwx’s lips and says, “don’t ever shut up.”

The End!

as for any loose ends:

- lwj manages to gain his anonymity back

- su she manages not to get beaten up by wwx or nmj but does get a restraining order

- wwx completes his collection and it’s a success! the best part is that he is holding the hand that started it all!

This fic has a nsfw one-shot on ao3 if any of you want to read it :)

http://archiveofourown.org/works/25827673

[crackimagines]

The New Professor (FE: Three Houses Short Fic)

Konosuba / School-Live! AU

CONTAINS School-Live! (Gakkou Gurashi) anime spoilers!

A new visitor arrives to Garreg Mach, causing a commotion among the population.

Byleth, Kazuma, and Aqua are sent to investigate who the new visitor is.

----

(Byleth) sigh

(Aqua) “Come on, tell me I’m right!”

(Kazuma) “Okay, you’re goddamn stupid.”

(Aqua) “Shut up, NEET!”

(Kazuma) “Stop calling me a NEET you bitch!”

(Sothis) “Ugh, what are they complaining about now?”

(Byleth) “Apparently something about the amiibo gazebo being part of a greater power than you or anything here...”

(Sothis) “And that’s why they’re throwing profanity around?”

(Aqua) “Listen, this is a serious discussion!”

(Kazuma) “One that you’re completely wrong about!”

Byleth shook his head. He was starting to regret asking them to lunch. 

Before he could continue eating, Alois ran up to his table.

(Alois) “Ah, there you are Byleth!”

(Byleth) “Alois, what’s wrong?”

(Alois) “We just found a woman unconscious near the classrooms!”

(Byleth) “What?!”

(Kazuma) “Wait, why are you telling him this, isn’t this stuff left to the knights?”

(Alois) “Well the thing is, we don’t know where she came from, or who she is. I daresay she’s not even from Fodlan!”

(Aqua) “Wait, like as in completely foreign country or?”

(Alois) “As in, completely otherwordly! Actually, her clothing reminds me a bit of yours, Kazuma!”

Kazuma’s eyes widened and turned to Aqua.

(Kazuma) “Hold up a sec, you think she could be...?”

(Aqua) “Only one way to find out! Byleth, we’re coming with you!”

Byleth nodded and the three of them followed Alois to the classrooms. 

...

...

----

SLAM!

Megumi shut the door behind her as hard as she could, making sure it couldn’t be open from the other side.

(???) “Let me go!”

(??? 2) Yuki-chan, stop it!”

(???) “Megu-nee’s still outside! We have to hurry!”

(??? 3) “It’s too late!”

(??? 2) “WAIT!”

(???) “Megu-nee! MEGU-NEEEEE!”

...

...

(??? 1) “Shit, she looks beat up bad!”

(??? 2) “There’s blood everywhere, what happened to her?!”

(??? 3) “You guys didn’t try to get a healer first?”

(??? 4) “We tried! There’s something in her arm that’s spreading and we can’t stop it!”

(??? 1) “Aqua!”

(??? 2) “On it! Oh no...From what I’m seeing in her injuries, it’s like some zombie infection!”

(??? 3) “Wait, what’s a zombie?”

(??? 1) “God damn, what the hell?! Tch, nevermind, questions later! We gotta use Turn Undead!”

(??? 2) “Wait, that’s going to hurt her!”

(??? 1) “Aqua, it doesn’t look like she’s fully infected yet, so maybe it can stop it before it spreads! We gotta do SOMETHING!”

(??? 1) “Damn, TURN UNDEAD!”

Megumi could only hear the voices faintly, but it started to grow louder as she felt a sharp pain in her arm that quickly went away.

(??? 2) “Alright, she’s stabilizing.”

Megumi opened her eyes slowly, the light blinding her from the windows.

(Megumi) “H-Huh...?”

(Kazuma) “H-Hey, she’s waking up!”

She looked up and saw three people she’s never seen before, wearing what seemed to be medieval European clothing.

(Byleth) “I see you’re awake now.”

(Aqua) “Hey there!”

(Kazuma) “Better places to pass out than on the ground, ya know!”

(Megumi) “Where...am I?”

...

(Byleth) “Yes, we know Sothis. We’ll try to explain it in basic terms.”

(Megumi) ?

(Kazuma) “Well...put simply, you’re in a school.”

The word school echoed through her mind. Megumi’s heartbeat suddenly spiked as she almost jumped to her feet, looking behind her frantically.

(Megumi) “YUKI-CHAN!”

When she spun around, she only saw Alois and a few of the Monastery’s classrooms.

(Alois) “T-Take it easy ma’am! We know you’re confused but!”

Megumi’s breathing was out of control, her head jerking back and forth trying to find anything familiar. 

But to no avail.

(Megumi) “YUKI! KURUMI! RII-SAN! ANYONE?!”

(Byleth) “Miss, please, calm down!”

Kazuma grabbed the shoulders of the woman and kept her still.

(Kazuma) “Take a deep breath, alright?!”

Megumi eventually stopped shaking as she took in more of her surroundings. It was clear she wasn’t at the school anymore but...

With a deep exhale, she finally calmed down.

(Megumi) “I-I’m sorry...I-I don’t know where I am.”

(Byleth) “What’s your name?”

(Megumi) “My name...My name is Megumi Sakura. I’m a teacher at Megurigaoka Private High School.”

(Aqua) “That sounds a lot like...”

(Kazuma) “Japanese.”

(Aqua) “This is a weird question to ask but...Are you from Japan?”

(Megumi) “Yes, I am?”

Kazuma took a little comfort in that. He now wasn’t the only person thrown to this world from Earth.

(Kazuma) “Well...how do I put this? You’re not in Japan anymore, you’re pretty much in the same boat I am. We’re in a country called Fodlan.”

(Megumi) “Where is that?”

(Kazuma) “It doesn’t exist back on our world, Miss Sakura. We’re basically in a Fantasy Europe with straight up magic, dragons, all that crazy bullshit.”

(Megumi) “But...what happened to our world? My students?”

(Kazuma) “Um...I’m not sure. I didn’t come from YOUR world, per se. My world was in peace while yours seemed to be...uh...”

(Megumi) “I see...”

Megumi’s heart sank. She just happened to be unlucky enough to be in a world where crisis struck them instead of having a normal life like Kazuma.

(Aqua) “I’m sure you must have a million questions, but you need some rest! Here, follow me and I’ll try to answer anything you might ask on the way.”

(Megumi) “B-But...”

Sighing, Megumi followed Aqua to her room.

(Alois) “From another world? First you and your friends Kazuma, now her! What a crazy time to live in! Poor thing must be so confused if she’s shouting for her students like that...”

Kazuma couldn’t help but shiver at that. He couldn’t imagine coming to a brand new world completely alone. He was lucky to have others with him here. At the very least, he had some semblance of a fantasy world, Megumi must be feeling as if she were on another planet.

Which in some sense, she was.

(Kazuma) “Hey uh...she said she was a teacher, right?”

(Byleth) “Yeah, of some private school.”

(Kazuma) “Do...Do you think she could teach alongside you, professor?”

(Byleth) “What?”

(Kazuma) “Well, if the church throws her ass to the curb, she’s going to be completely lost! She doesn’t understand a world like yours in the slightest.”

Byleth looked at Megumi and nodded.

(Byleth) “I’ll talk to Rhea about it.”

...

After a few days of getting settled in and recovering, Megumi began to explore the Monastery with Kazuma and his gang.

(Aqua) “The Monastery is more of a military academy than a normal school.”

(Kazuma) “Yeah, Garreg Mach Monastery, or The Officer’s Academy, is the full name of this place.”

(Darkness) “Many people are aspiring to be a knight here. That is my goal. Well, being stuck here anyway.”

(Megumin) “My goal is to make a name for the Crimson Demon, and no matter the world we’re thrown into, that shall always be my top priority!”

(Megumi) “I had no idea other people could be thrown into worlds so casually...A-And what about God and?”

(Aqua) “Well you see I’m-”

Kazuma elbowed Aqua, shaking his head.

(Kazuma) “The poor woman’s going to be more confused, alright?! Just keep that to yourself for now!”

(Aqua) “Jerk!”

(Megumi) “Oh by the way, where is that blue haired man?”

(Kazuma) “Oh, professor Byleth? I’m not sure, honestly. I asked him to talk to the head honcho here of letting you teach here.”

(Megumi) “Huh?! B-But, I don’t know how to fight!”

(Aqua) “That’s fine! There’s still stuff like math here!”

(Darkness) “It’s just something to help you fit in. We don’t want you getting thrown out while you have no idea what’s happening.”

(Megumin) “Besides, I’m sure you’ll love the students here!”

(Claude’s Voice) “Well, probably just me.”

Claude, Dimitri, and Edelgard walked up to the group and noticed Megumi.

(Dimitri) “Ah, so you’re that new teacher that has been causing quite a stir! I am Dimitri, House leader of the Blue Lions.”

(Edelgard) “My name is Edelgard, and I am the House Leader of the Black Eagles.”

(Claude) “Claude, Golden Deer. Nice to meet ya!”

(Megumi) “T-Thank you! My name is Megumi Sakura...I-I’m sorry, did you say new teacher?”

(Edelgard) “Why yes. We’ve been informed that Byleth has an assistant who will be helping teach the three houses.”

(Megumi) “HUH?! W-WHY DID NO ONE ASK ME FIRST?!”

(Dimitri) “Hah, are you getting cold feet Professor Sakura?”

(Megumi) “...Professor Sakura...”

She smiled a little, blushing at the name.

(Megumi) “Well, at least someone’s finally referring to me as my proper teacher name.”

(Edelgard) “What did people usually refer to you as?”

(Megumi) “Megu-nee.”

(Aqua) “Aw, that’s actually kinda cute!”

(Megumi) “It’s not befitting of a teacher!”

(Claude) “Megu-nee..Hah, I like that sound of that a bit better honestly!”

(Edelgard) “Megun-nee. It does have a nice ring to it.”

(Dimitri) “Well, Megu-nee, we’ll be seeing you soon! We just wanted to say hello.”

(Claude) “Be seein’ ya around!”

(Megumi) “D-DON’T CALL ME MEGU-NEE! IT’S...ah...”

Everyone else laughed at her embarassment, but Kazuma put a hand on her shoulder.

(Kazuma) “You’ll fit right in, Megu-nee! Those three will put in a good word for ya! Byleth will be too, no doubt!”

Everyone gave her an encouraging smile.

(Darkness) “Please, if you need us for anything do not hesitate to ask for help.”

(Megumi) “...”

A part of her was going to miss her students so dearly. Yuki, Kurumi, and Yuuri would be alone without her, missing her and thinking that she was dead. She wanted to tell them that she was alive and well thanks to the help of everyone here so far but...

Megumi knew that was going to be a long time before that happened.

With the help of everyone here, she knew the road was going to be a lot less lonely than she thought. 

(Megumi) “I never could’ve anticipated that this was where my life was going to go once I thought I was dead but...I won’t waste this second chance you’ve given me, so for that I will do my best to repay it and continue teaching!”

(Byleth) “We’re happy to hear it.”

Byleth smiled at her as he walked over, extending his hand.

(Byleth) “Welcome to the family, Megumi.”

She hesitated before giving her hand, but she took Byleth’s hand and shook it firmly.

(Byleth) “Come on, the rest of the staff wants to meet you.”

(Megumi) “R-Right!”

(Kazuma) “Good luck, Megu-nee!”

She spun around quickly and pouted.

“Kazuma, don’t call me Megu-nee! It’s Professor Sakura!”

Unfortunately for her, no one would heed her wishes to be called that.

Everyone greeted their new professor, Megu-nee.

---

[Indirect Sequel: Megumi Sakura as a Professor AU]

[purplesurveys]

962

Do you have a pair of Beat headphones? I used to have a pair. I mean it’s still around in my closet, but it’s completely broken now with the cable all given out and the cushion for the left ear has been missing for a while. I just don’t have the heart to throw it out because it was my absolute favorite pair of headphones that gave me good memories during a particularly shitty time in high school.

How was your week? A little better. I’ve gotten into the groove at work so I’m no longer shy when it comes to asking questions and giving inputs, and I’ve gained a better grasp of the workplace’s dynamic so it’s also been easier to communicate with people. Heavy life stuff is still around and it won’t be leaving for a while, but they were easier to ignore this week.

Are any of your electronics not working properly at the moment? Not really, but my phone’s charger cable recently stopped working. I have a backup that I’m using at the moment and while it’s able to charge my phone, it’s starting to fray and I’m not feeling too good about the wires that I’m starting to see hahaha. I just don’t know how to take care of my cables, guys. Anyway, this question made me paranoid so I took a few minutes to wrap a shit ton of electrical tape on the frayed area so I think it’s all good for now.

Are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day? I like thinking about my wedding but I truthfully dread the wedding gown part. I’ve never been able to decide what look and style suits me best and I’ve just never been good at determining things like that. I like to imagine that I’d leave that bit to whoever my maid of honor will be, because I’d definitely prize a second opinion more than my own.

When was the last time you felt relieved? Yesterday, 6 PM when I exited the last Google Meet for the day. It was a Friday night and it meant my work week was over :)) I mean I love what I do, but Friday nights will always hit differently.

Does it bother you when an artist remakes a song that one has previously done? I wouldn’t say it bothers me but covers are definitely a hit or miss for me, with way more misses than hits. Nothing wrong with acts putting their own spin on an already existing song, but I’m personally the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” type when it comes to music.

What brand of chapstick do you use? I don’t use any mainly because I’m bound to lose them within a week. Same goes for other care products.

Do you really think someone could be perfect? No. Everyone has their flaws and that should be okay to acknowledge.

When was the last time you cried? Wednesday, I think. It’s been three days! I’d count that as an achievement. But idk, my sadness comes in waves so I shouldn’t be celebrating too early. I’m sure I’ll feel a pang soon and be crying again over the weekend.

What’s a food that you like every once in awhile but not often? Cake. Too sweet and rich; I wouldn’t enjoy eating it every day. What letter is the song you’re listening to under? Not listening to music, but I have a YouTube video on.

Would you rather visit the 60s or 70s? 60s would be the lesser evil, I guess. I would NOT want to live through Martial Law in the 70s...I originally wasn’t even going to go with 60s because I think the world was a bit chaotic at the time, but I think my country was mostly unaffected by the political/cultural things happening then so it’s whatever.

Are you the type of person that enjoys getting hugs? I don’t actively seek them out but it feels nice when someone likes me enough to extend their arms out to me for a hug. I haven’t been hugged for a while and I feel kinda empty.

Do your socks say anything on them? I think some of my socks have the brand name on them but that’s it.

Name a TV channel that only has three letters in it. AMC.

Have you found out who your true friends are? For now, yes.

Gray or Grey? I use both spellings for no particular context. I simply like changing it up lol.

Will you be buying concert tickets any time soon? LOL of course not. And I’m very picky when it comes to concerts that I choose to attend anyway, so I doubt I would’ve bought any tickets in the last six months even without Covid unless it was for Paramore or Beyoncé.

Have you seen the movie The Perks of Being a Wallflower? Did you like it? Nope, but everyone was hyping that movie up when it came out. It never really looked like my thing < Yeah pretty much. I feel like it’s such a teenage-y movie so I was never drawn to it. I also think it would be too triggering for my depression, so I’ve felt wary about checking both book and movie out.

Is there something you’d fall apart if you didn’t have? One of my biggest fears is to end up alone, so I always have to have some form of a support system to fall back into. I would be very lost if I didn’t have at least one person to rely on.

How many weddings have you been to? I can think of four off the top of my head. I was either a flower girl or a junior bridesmaid for all of those.

When you smile, are you confident? Most times I am; I like to smile. But sometimes I smile just to fake it and avoid any questions.

Have you ever not done something because you were afraid of getting in trouble? Yesss, all the time. I’ve always been all about following the rules and I’ve never seen the appeal in breaking them. That makes me sound boring but at least I’ve never gotten in serious trouble lol.

Was the weather beautiful today? For me it is, but only because I like the rain and cloudy weather. Others might find it bleak and sad, but I feel right at home.

Do you have to have a fan on when you sleep? Yeah, all year long.

Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? If I had my dream modern/brutalist home, grey would be soooo fucking perfect for the bedroom. 

Would you ever dye part of your hair blue? I’m open to it, but I don’t think it’ll be a good match for my black hair as both are darker shades as it is. If I could dye my hair I’d pick lighter colors like green or even go all the way to blonde.

Have you ever gone to a private school? Yeah, from kindergarten all the way to high school. Private schools here typically give a better quality of education and they don’t give off the for-lazy-spoiled-kids vibe that I always hear from private schools in other countries, which makes them the norm for middle and upper-middle class families.

Is Finding Nemo a favorite movie of yours? I have other favorite animated movies, but that doesn’t stop me from loving Finding Nemo. :) I would always tune in for the whole thing if it were on.

Does/Did your school have a uniform? I had to wear one in my first school, but I didn’t need one for college.

Turn on the TV. What channel are you on? No TV where I am. I think my parents are watching a movie on their TV, but it’s on Netflix rather than a channel.

Does your house have security cameras? It does not.

Does a popsicle sound good right now? Eh, I guess it sounds fine but I’d rather have a pint of ice cream. I think that fits better with the weather and the mood that I’m in today.

What’s your favorite exercise workout? My weight training class last year was a lot of fun. I always felt dead after every session haha but I definitely felt healthier. I wish the semester had gone on longer just for that one class.

What’s your favorite thing to do? Lol I love doing many different things < Same lmao this question is so vague??? My favorite thing to do these days is binge-watch Rhett and Link content, but I like doing so many other things too.

What did you do for your 17th birthday? I was with Gabie that day and we went to a local art museum, as well as to a restaurant that she had wanted to take me to.

Does your local Walmart have benches in them to rest? We don’t have Walmarts.

Was your favorite stuffed animal really a teddy bear growing up? I never had stuffed animals. Well I was given a few of them as gifts, but I was never into them and they always ended up being owned by my sister.

If your house was haunted, what would you do? Not even think about it. Just show them that I couldn’t care less, lol.

Are you good at swimming? I can do a few strokes and am pretty good at treading, but I'm prone to panic-kicking when I can tell that the water is too deep.

What’s worse: Slow internet or slow walkers? Slow internet is such a pain in the ass. Shouldn’t even have to be an issue in 2020 anymore.

What is the rudest thing a guy has ever done to you? Cat-called, whistled at, winked at, lunged at. One good thing about this lockdown is that I haven’t had to deal with men as much as I used to. Do you sleep with the sheets tucked in or out? Well I only have one layer of bedsheet and it’s the one that covers up the mattress, so it’s tucked in by default. I have a blanket to cover me up when I’m cold.

What do you do to fall asleep faster? I find a few videos to watch as that tends to make me feel sleepy the quickest.

Do you carry a bottle of water wherever you go? I used to have a tumbler/water bottle in college but I forgot it at the gym one day and when I came back for it, somebody already stole it :( It was such a handy water bottle because it kept my water cold all day, so it sucks that I lost it. I’m planning to buy the same model again soon.

Are you afraid that one day you might get cancer? It doesn’t really run in my family save for one grand-aunt who had cancer, so I’m not too worried. But I’ve accepted the fact that it is at least a possibility.

Are you a fast or slow walker? I like being in the middle. Slow walkers are annoying so I try not to be one, and walking fast just reminds me of my mom and how quickly she walks at malls when she’s supposed to be spending time with her family lol.

Do you usually have to wear a belt with your pants? No. They all fit me just fine.

Does it bother you when people’s underwear hangs out? Eghhh, it really does. I know it shouldn’t but it really does. I just feel like it’s so invasive and it gives me a lot of secondhand embarassment.

Are you usually the person to try new things with your hair? Not really. I like staying safe with my hair. The most daring thing I’ve done with it is get bangs tbh, and I don’t plan on going any further than that.

When’s your birthday? April 21st.

What age do you look forward to reaching? I don’t feel that way about any age. Whenever I reach ultimate satisfaction and security will be a good enough age for me.

Name a state that begins with the letter M. Minnesota.

What’s the first thing you do after a car accident? Think about how to tell my parents. D:

What do you use to get rid of bad breath? Brush my teeth, drink water.

What exercise do you hate the most? Pull-ups.

What do you do at a party? Drink, socialize, tell stories, eat allllllll the food ha.

[btssavedmylifeblr]

I had a dream last night where Commander Namjoon did watch the tape and he got a little 🥵 by it. I know it’ll never be canon to Void, and you’ve already got so much stuff you’re working on, but how do you think he would have reacted? Would you ever be interested in writing a lil drabble about it? Void 5 btw was fantastic!

Okay... so I have three different previous versions of this scene that all involved him watching the tape. But none of them felt right, so I removed them and started over until we got the version that’s in Void 5. But you can see what it might have looked like. They are all first or second drafts though, so they aren’t very detailed. And they don’t all make sense in context anymore because a lot of the chapter changed around them

Version 1

Namjoon walks over to his computer where the video is still open, lewdly starring at you. 

The idea that he was just watching it in here both embarasses and arouses you. 

“You sure about this?”

“Absolutely.”

The video starts playing. Video-you always seems sexier when on of your crew members is watching. 

“So you really aren’t fucking Yoongi?”

“No.”

“Poor bastard. How he could resist touching you…” Namjoon says, then looks over, wondering if he has taken it too far.

“Could you?” you ask, enjoying seeing your commander lose some of his carefully crafted control.

“I’m not sure.”

 “Though if we’re keeping no secrets, he did come on me after the video finished.”

“Fuck…” he adjusts his pants again, erection becoming obvious. 

He gets to the part of the video where you admit that you want to blow him and pauses.

“You want to suck my dick?”

You nod. 

“You’re not just saying that for the video?”

“No, I want to so badly, commander.”

“This is a bad idea,” he sighs. “I’m your commanding officer.”

Can’t let it go when you’re this close. 

“And you’re such  a good commander. You’re such a good leader. You take such good care of your crew. You would take of me wouldn’t you? Help me with this problem I’m having?”

“What problem is that?”

“That I haven’t touched a cock in two years.” You are walking over to him all seductively. 

“Fuck…”

“Can I see it?”

He nods. He is only so strong. 

You blow him. 

It is amazing to touch a dick again. You just want to lavish it with attention. 

He comes pretty quickly. You stand up proud of yourself. He pulls you down into his lap. 

He tries to kiss you, but you refuse.

“It’s just hormones commander. Just sexual release. Not emotional attachment. He nods. 

“Well, I can reciprocate right?” Sneaks hand up between your legs. “My god you’re so wet. That really turned you on.”

He gets you off with his fingers. It feels so amazing to have something inside you again. Two fingers plus thumb on clit and he kisses your neck and chest. 

It feels amazing. 

“I think I have a way to solve our morale problem.” You say. “Call a group meeting for tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Version 2

Things have mostly gone back to normal, maybe there’s some lingering flirtation with Jimin and Yoongi, when the Commander asks to speak with you alone. Namjoon calls you to the bridge.

“I need to ask you something.” “What is the nature of your relationship with Engineer Min?”

You panic. What is your relationship? He’s seen you naked and you almost fucked him but didn’t? He helped you film some porn but now you’ve deleted it?

“He’s my crew member.” That was true. 

“And he has been entirely professional with you?” Well, no, he most certainly had not. But you were as much at fault with that as he was. Where was this coming from? Does he no something. 

“It’s hard to be perfectly professional all the time.”

Namjoon frowns and nods. “Is there anything you want to tell me?”

“Why are you asking me this?”

“Um, recently it has come to my attention that there might be a sexual relationship between you two.”

Who brought it to his attention? Can he just sense the pheromones radiating off you? Is the tension between you that noticeable? You doubted Yoongi would have said anything. 

“Why do you think there’s something between us?”

Breathes out.

“Something had been brought to my attention.” Oh no. It can’t be can it? How would he have gotten it?

Oh no. Oh no. 

“A video. Of you. And Yoongi.” Panic panic panic. “In a sexually compromising position.” Had he watched it? He must?  Shame is making the world collapse around you. Do they all know now? Do they know all your filthy secrets?

“Breathe breathe,” He approaches you to be comforting. “Look, I just need to know if its consensual.”

“Consensual?”

“That he’s not pressuring you or harrassing you into something you don’t want to be doing.”

You begin crying. You thought he was going to punish or chastise you, but he just wants to make sure you’re okay. 

You hate that you are crying in front of your commander. What a stupid girlish thing to be doing. 

“I’m so sorry” you sob. He gathers you into his arms.

“Why are you sorry?” He is so warm and solid.

“I behaved totally unprofessionally. I fucked up the whole mission.”

“You have not fucked up the whole mission.” 

“It gets so lonely here.” 

He wipes away your tears.  “I get it. I get lonely too.”

“You do?”

“I’m sure we all do.”

“No one else is running around making porn though.”

“Maybe we just don’t have an interested audience. Who’d want to see that?”

You would, but you don’t say that. 

“There’s actually nothing in the official rules that prohibits crew members from being sexually intimate.” 

“There isn’t?”

“I mean, we’re all consenting adults with no other humans for millions of miles. The ICSE isn’t stupid. The relationship just has be disclosed to your commanding officer.”

“So everyone can have sex but you?” He is surprised at this line of questioning. 

“Well, uh, I guess I would have to disclose it to my commander back on Earth. But, it seems unlikely that I will be be doing that.”

Does he not know how much you want him? “Did you watch the whole video?”

“What?” Wide-eyed. “I mean, I had to make sure you weren’t being coerced.”

“So you watched the whole thing?”

“It was corrupted. Tae only got bits and pieces.”

“So you don’t know.”

“Know what?”

“You don’t think it would mess up the group dynamics? Cause jealousy?”

“You’re a grown woman. It’s not my job to police who you have sex with. If you want to be in a relationship with Yoongi, that is none of my business. We’re all grown men. We can deal.”

“I don’t want to be in a relationship with Yoongi. I just want to fuck him.”

Namjoon is shocked. “Oh, well, okay. That’s fine too. We can restrain ourselves.”

“I want to fuck you too.”

“You do?”

“God yes.”

He kisses you. 

“Fuck, wait. I do actually have to report this if we’re going to do this.” 

“What do you have to tell them?”

“Just that we’ve entered into a consensual sexual relationship.” His hair is all mussed from where you ran your hands through it. “There’s some paperwork you’d have to sign.”

You think of Jimin and Yoongi. “Would we have to be exclusive?”

“No, not if you didn’t want to.”

“Would you want me to?”

“That’s not my call.”

“Would you have to tell them about any other crew members?” You cant have it reported back to Earth that you are skanking it up out here.

“You would still have to sign paperwork. But I could keep that paperwork internally.”

You smile and nod. “So, where’s the paperwork?”

“Umm, I have to request it.”

“Wait, so does that mean we can’t…”

“Yeah?” but he seems really unsure about that.

“Fuck.” 

He laughs.

“What if we didn’t take our clothes off?”

Dry humping, with a slow removal of clothes. Leads to fingering and oral sex.

“So now what?”

“Get me some paperwork.”

Version 3

“Hello officer,” he says. “Please come in.”

You come in, nervous. 

“Take a seat.” He commands. It’s the only chair. It feels like an interrogation as he leans against the wall of his office. You sit down.

“What is the nature of your relationship with Flight Engineer Min Yoongi?”

“Why do you ask?” You aren’t sure how to play this right now. 

“I just need you to answer the question, officer.” 

God, your commander was terrifying sometimes. His fingers were clasped in front of his face. Face impassive. 

“We are colleagues,” you answer.  It is the truth, just with some facts omitted. 

Namjoon raises a disbelieving eyebrow. “And what is your relationship with Mission Specialist Park?”

Oh god. He’s watched it. He not only knows that it exists but he’s seen it. He heard you admit to wanting to fuck the whole crew. 

“The same.” You bite your lip in shame. You will not cry. “We are colleagues.”

“Has any member of this crew threatened you?”

“No.” It’s an unexpected question.

“Has any member of this crew coerced you?”

“No.”

“Bribed you?”

“No.” 

“Asked you to do anything you didn’t want to do?”

“No.”

Namjoon sighs. “Okay, then. That’s a relief.” 

“A relief?”

“Yes, I needed to make sure everything was consentual.”

“That’s it?”

“Well, I could lecture you about how our scientific equipment shouldn’t be used for making porn if you like. But I think you already know that.”

“Yes, sir.” God, its so embarssing. 

“You’re sure nothing coercive happened? I will be speaking to Engineer Min later. If he’s harrassing you, you can tell me.”

You are worried about Yoongi. It was your fault he was in this mess in the first place. 

“”No, it was my idea actually. I asked Yoongi to help me.”

“Your idea?” Your commander laughs. “Well that’s unexpected.”

“I’m so sorry commander. I tried to delete it. I never meant for anyone to see it.”

“Why would you film it then? You weren’t intending it for Jimin? What exactly is the specialist’s role in all this?”

“Jimin didn’t know about it.” God, you have no explanation. 

Namjoon takes pity on you. 

“Look, it’s okay. If you want to be having sex with Yoongi or Jimin or whatever, that’s fine.”

“It is?”

“I mean, you need to immediately stop using government equipment to do so. But yeah. You’re all grown adults with sexual needs. It gets lonely up here. It makes sense that you would feel attraction. As long as everything’s consentual…

“But the ICSE?”

“-is not in charge of our personal lives.”

“You don’t think it would cause problems with the crew? Jealousy?”

“We are all grown men. We can deal with it. You and Yoongi get extra bathroom duty for two weeks for misuse of equipment. Jungkook get one week of extra air filter work for not reporting their discovery to me immediately. Taehyung and Jimin get a month of extra night shifts for fighting.

“Oh.” It seems so anticlimatic.

“Look, what I can’t have is secrets. I need to know everything happening on my ship. If you are in a relationship with any of the crew I need to know. Everyone needs to know. I can’t have crew members brawling over secret elicit videos. It has to be out in the open. That’s for your protection as well as everyone else’s.”

“Yes, sir.”

“So are you in a relationship with Yoongi?”

“No.”

“Do you want to be?”

“Um, no not really.”  Pause. “I just want to fuck him.”

Namjoon snorts. 

“Well,” he laughs. “That’s okay too. Again, as long as everyone’s up front about it.”

“Everyone?”

“The whole crew needs to have the same information.”

You laugh. “That will make for an interesting group meeting. Hello crew of the Minos, just wanted to let you know that I would like to have sex with all of you.”

“Wait what?” Namjoon is surprised. “All of us?”

Shit. Did he not know that?

“Didn’t you watch the video?”

“I did, I mean, only the beginning. I turned it off once I figured out what it was.”

“What about having no secrets?”

“Well, um, it was getting difficult to remain objective.” He grabs his crotch to adjust himself and your mouth beings watering. He had just handed a starving person a ticket to the buffet and he was looking like a whole meal. 

“I think you should watch the rest of the video. If you want to, commander.”

He swallows. “Now?”

“No secrets right?”

[blacknight1230]

Inexperienced - Otis Milburn Imagine (2/?)

After school, while waiting for Eric, Otis is surprised to have his crush, (y/n), come up to him. The two end up having a bonding experience as (y/n) brings Otis to her favorite spot in town, and learn new things about each other as trust builds between the two. All of this makes Otis wonder if things between them are as platonic as they seem. 

Part 1

“Where’s Eric? He should be done with his classes now,” Otis said as he waited by the bike rack in front of the school. “Hey, Otis!” a voice shouted, causing the dark-haired boy to turn towards the source. Coming out of the school’s front entrance, was (y/n), a smile on her face and happiness in her eyes. Otis nervously waved at her, surprised by his friend, and crush, of two months randomly being here at this time. School wa slet out fifteen minutes ago after all and most students would literally sprint out of class, and the school itself, when they were able to. 

(Y/n) quickly caught up to him, holding the strap of her backpack. “Eric told me to tell you he’s sorry he couldn’t walk back with you today. He still has detention with Mr. Kendricks he’s got to deal with,” (y/n) apologized for her other friend. “It’s okay. Eric probably is getting sick and tired of being with me all the time anyway,” Otis tried to joke around, but it sounded more depressing than funny. “Oh, that’s not true. Eric loves you. In a non-romantic way, obviously,” (y/n) reassured him. Otis stifled a burst of laughter at the last sentence, but a smile still made its way to his lips. “Is it okay if I walk with you instead? My house is on the way,” (y/n) asked. “Sure, why not,” Otis said calmly. But on the inside, he was screaming and flailing around. 

(y/n) continued to chat with Otis as he walked alongside his bicycle. “So, anything new happened today?” Otis asked, starting the conversation. “Nothing much. Maeve has started to trust me more. Enough for her to confide in me about her family life,” (y/n) said, staring off into the distance as they traveled along the walking bridge Otis took to get to and from school everyday. “That’s actually awesome. I’m glad you and her are getting along so well. She never talks about stuff like to that to just anyone. The only one she’s talk to  about her home life was me.” “I understand why she does. With everyone calling her Cockbiter, she doesn’t need other people to tease her about her non-existent family”, (y/n) said. 

A brief silence was shared between the two, before (y/n) broke it. “Hey, do you want to see something cool?” (y/n) asked excitedly, here eyes shining with excitement. Otis was so entranced by her innocent joy that she’ll be able to show him something so special to her that he just had to agree. “Alright, lead the way,” he said. (y/n) squealed in excitement and smiled widely, teeth shining brightly as she grabbed Otis’s hand and pulled him along. A blush burned on his cheeks at the girl holding his hand, but (y/n) seemed oblivious to this. So, (y/n) led him away from his usual route, through the trees, across a stream, and into a field of flowers overlooking the town. 

(y/n) let go of Otis’s hand and ran into the seemingly endless rows of wild flowers. Otis could only look at the scene with amazement, the sun warm on his skin, the scent of flowers wafting through the air. “Otis! Come sit next to me!” (y/n) yelled from her spot on the flowery hill. Otis had no trouble finding his new friend, the flowers and grass, not the high enough to hide a person if they want to rest and enjoy the scenery sitting down. He sat next to (y/n), the wild green grass tickling the palms of his hands. “So, what do you think of my little spot?” (y/n) asked, as they stared at the town below. “It’s so peaceful here. How have I never been here before?” Otis wondered out loud. “I found this place about a month ago. It’s quickly been my go to place to get away from the drama of school and everyday life,” (y/n) explained. Her eyes were closed as she basked in the afternoon sunlight. She looks absolutely perfect, Otis thought as he admired her. They sat and enjoyed the silence as they watched the world go by from their little slice of heaven. 

“Otis,” (y/n) said as the sky turned pink, the sun about to set. “Can I confide in you about something?” “Of course,. You can trust me. And I promise not to tell anyone if you’re worried,” Otis replied, wondering what she wanted to tell him. A part of him was happy that she wanted to confide in him about her worries, too. (y/n) inhaled, then started to speak. “Do you ever feel like you’re completely clueless about relationships?” she asked as she looked at the landscape. “What?” Otis was confused; what did she mean? “Like I feel completely oblivious about love and maintaining a good romantic relationship. I’ve never had a boyfriend or anything and usually its because I’m scammed I’ll do the wrong thing. And everyone seems to be experts in this field. Hell, I just saw a couple fucking behind the bushes on in front of the school!” 

Otis chuckled at the last sentence in her little rant, having seen the same exact thing every day of school and complained about it too. “Hey, you can’t be the only one who feels this way,” Otis tried to reassure her. “It seems very unlikely. I feel so isolated because of it and like there is something wrong with me,” (y/n) said, fingers playing around with the strand and petals of flowers next to her. She was refusing to make eye contact with Otis. Said boy sat back and decided to tell her what he barely told anyone, even his mom. “Well, I’m still a virgin and sexually inexperienced,” he said, a blush coming to his cheeks. I can’t believe I’m telling her this, Otis though in embarrassment. “Really? So you feel the same way as I do,” (y/n) wondered out loud. “You can say that. But the thing is that I have more trouble than you do,” Otis admitted. “What do you mean?” 

“Um, it’s not something I usually talk about,” he said nervously, palms starting to sweat. “Come on, Otis. I told you about my embarrassing problems,” (y/n) tried to persuade him. “It’s hard to admit, especially to you. The only one who know about this is Eric. Well, besides my mom, but that’s because she’s very nosy.” (y/n) giggled when he complained about his mother. “Please, Otis, I promise not to tell anyone. This will just be between you and me.” “I don’t know ...” “Please, for me.” Otis stared at (y/n), heart strings being pulled, as she gave him a puppy-eyed look that he caved in from. “Ok,” he sighed. (y/n) smiled and repositioned herself in a comfortable position, eagerly waiting for him to began. I naturally trust her. Why? Otis thought before he began to tell her his most embarrassing secret. 

“God, I can’t believe I’m admitting this. Alright, here I go; I can’t masturabte,” he said, the last sentence being spoken in a rush. “Wait, you can’t ...” (y/n) trailed off and made hand motions for the act. “I mean, it works fine and everything and I know its natural and everyone does it, but I just ... can’t. I feel icky doing it,” Otis explained, cheeks hot as he admitted this. “Hmm, interesting. Have you thought that you might be celibate or asexual?” (y/n) asked, curious and seeming to understand him. “No, I’m definitely not either of those. I was dating Ola, before she broke it off with me, and I’m still plagued by hormonal teenage urges,” Otis tried to explain, without going into too much detail. 

“It might be psychological then. Like a bad memory pops up whenever you try it or think about it,” (y/n) pondered, trying to figure out the cause of Otis’s complex personal problem. “Maybe,” Otis mumbled. He specifically remembered the incident with Lily. When the weird girl tried to touch him and act sexy, which failed horribly, he did have a panic attack when the memory of him catching his father having sex with his patients behind his mother’s back popped up when Lily touched him. “Have you tried to talking to your mom? I know she’s a sex therapist, so maybe you can professional help from her,” (y/n) questioned. “Definitely not. I don’t need her to find out about this. She already embarasses me by nonchalantly talking about sex and telling people about my sex life. Well lack of a sexual live,” Otis ranted. 

“Sadly, you can’t go to the Clinic for help. I was actually thinking of going to it for my problem,” (y/n) said. “You were?” Otis said, amazed. “Yeah, but I like this way better. We both get to learn more about each other and build trust between us,” (y/n) continued, a bright smile on her face. Otis could feel his heart flutter in his chest from admiration, falling more in love with her. “I’m glad we got the chance to talk then,” Otis replied, bright blue eyes looking at the (h/c) haired girl next to him, with affectionate eyes. “And talk about what’s bothering you so much.” “Me, too, Otis. Me, too.” 

Otis noticed that his left hand and (y/n)’s right hand were resting next to each other on the grassy ground. Gaining a sudden wave of courage, he nonchalantly covered her hand with his, inwardly shuttering at the feeling of (y/n)’s soft warm skin. (y/n) didn’t move her hand when he ghosted his hand over hers, giving no indication besides a small smile that he did anything. If Otis’s heart wasn’t beating rapidly before, it definitely was when (y/n) shuffled closer to him and lightly laid her head on his shoulder, then gently grasped his left hand that Otis had laid over hers. He decided to just enjoy the moment, looking at the landscape before him as it slowly changed color as the sun started to set. 

The moment was interrupted by a phone rigging, the shrill noise braking the quiet and calm scene. (y/n) hurriedly detached herself from Otis, rummaging through her pants pockets looking for her phone. She eventually found it and quickly answered the phone call, speaking a frantic greeting in the speaker. Otis could hear a woman on the other end, talking loudly to the point she was almost screaming, yet he couldn’t hear what she said. “Sorry, mom, I’ll come home right now. I’ll be there soon,” (y/n) said before ending the call. “I’ve got to go home, Otis. I completely lost track of time and I made my mom worried,” she explained to Otis, getting up and gathering her stuff. “Oh. It’s okay. I’ve got to go home, too,” he reassured her, getting up from the ground, too. A part of Otis was sad that she had to leave, enjoying the way they just basked in each other’s presence and didn’t have to say a word to enjoy their time together. 

He grabbed his backpack and bike, silently followed (y/n) across the field of flowers, into the woods, past the little stream, and onto the walking/biking path that eventually led to the Otis’s street. Before the two went on their separate ways, (y/n) turned to Ots. “I enjoyed spending time with you, Otis. I can’t wait to do this again,” she said, a king smile on her face. “I did, too. I have a feeling I’ll keep going to that field again and again,” Otis replied, looking down at the (slightly/much) shorter girl, her infectious smile making its way to his face. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” (y/n) asked. “Of course. You’ll see me at my locker next to yours.” “Good. I’ll see you tomorrow then.” 

(y/n) suddenly left a small peck of her lips on his cheek, before leaving him frozen in shock at the wooden bridge. Otis could only stand there, his cheeks red, watching (y/n) rush back home. When her figure disappeared from his sight, Otis lifted a hand to feel the cheek she kissed, almost feeling the smoothness and warmth of her lips on his cheek. Otis started to half celebrate, half freak out about this. She kissed my cheek! I can’t believe it! Does that mean she likes me? Or was that a platonic kiss? Otis wondered. A text notification broke Otis away from his inward battle, making him take a look at his phone. He got a text from mother, who was wondering where he was and that dinner was waiting for him on the table. Otis quickly mounted his bike and pedalled away towards his house, the cheek kiss still on his mind. 

TO BE CONTINUED

[lovemesomesurveys]

How often do you take painkillers? Everyday. I’m on a pain management regimen. Are they prescribed?  Yes. Do you curse in average conversations?  No. Do you own any leather?  Nope. Just pleather. Do you party because you like it or because you're supposed to? I don’t party or go out at all anymore (and I can’t even blame the quarantine for that, I’ve been doing that for the past few years), but back when I did have a social life and hung out with friends and drank, part of it was because I felt I had to. Like I was a young in my early 20s, that’s what you do, right? That was my thinking at the time. My friends all wanted to do it. I’m not going to say I never had fun or that I never wanted to, but I wouldn’t have done it as much otherwise.

Who's the person you think about when you're lying awake?  I think more about a lot of things rather than people or a certain someone. Have you ever bought a shot glass?  Yeah. Do you have a therapist? No. I should. Have you ever wanted to be a superhero? No. Do you like menthol cigarettes?  I don’t like any cigarettes. Do you ever fall for spam mail?  Nope. Ever used an online dating site?  Nope. I have no interest. What color do you wear the most?  Black. Do you only eat cough drops because you like the taste? No. I have had cough drops before when I didn’t actually need one, though. The minty ones were really minty and I liked them.  Have you ever gotten a good grade in math class? I actually managed a B once in one of my math classes in college.  Do you have a tumblr account?  Nope, never heard of it.  Have you ever seen a ghost?  No. Insomniac?  Yes. What do you think of the last person you texted?  She’s my Nana, I love her. She’s so sweet. Have you parents ever walked in on you having sex? Gah, nooo. I would die. Have you ever lied about being a virgin?  No. I am a virgin, I have no reason to lie about that. Are Australian accents attractive? Sure. Do you like getting stoned?  I haven’t smoked in years. Have you ever gotten a bloody nose from snorting cocaine? I’ve never done cocaine. Have you ever smoked cocaine? ^^^ Do you own a full set of coloured pencils?  Yeah, I actually have a few.  Have you ever seriously questioned your sexuality?  No. Red, white, yellow, or pink roses?  All of them are pretty. What's the worst name your mom has ever called you? She’s never called me a mean name. Do you think someone would ever want to marry you? Nope. I don’t see myself ever getting married. Do you know who Jim Morrison is?  Yeah. Have you ever done acid?  Nope. Were you at a rave? I’ve never been to rave. I’ve never had any interest in going to one. Can you usually tell when someone's lying? I think I’m pretty good at that. Have you ever made a mistake just so you could feel miserable?  No? I make a lot of mistakes and feel miserable, but I definitely don’t purposely make them so I can feel miserable. Do you like Thanksgiving? Yeah. How about Christmas? I love Christmas. Are you friends with any of your ex's?  I don’t have any friends anymore, but yeah I was.

Have you ever thought you were drowning? No. That’s a terrifying thought. What's the most embarrassing artist you have on your ipod? I don’t think any of the music I listen to is embarrassing. Also, I don’t use an iPod, I use Spotify on my phone. Do you know someone in the army?  Yes. Do gay people make you uncomfortable?  No... they’re just people? Someone who happens to be gay could also possibly make me feel uncomfortable for some reason, but it’s not because they’re gay. Anyone could make me feel uncomfortable.

Do straight people make you uncomfortable? Same thing as I said up there. ^^^ Do you ever wear coloured eye liner?  Nah. I haven’t worn any eyeliner (or any makeup at all) in quite awhile. I always just preferred black, though. Target or Walmart?  Target. Have you ever used crest white strips? Did they work?  I’ve never used them. Who's the last person you made a mix cd for?  I haven’t made one in several years, but it was probably my mom. I made them all the time. Did you ever have a thing for any of your teachers? Nope. Do you excercise every day? I don’t exercise at all. I should work on my upper body strength.  Have you ever used a dark room?  Nope. How many hours of sleep did you get last night? About 8. Have you ditched any classes today? I’m done with school. What does the word 'Candy' mean to you?  Uhh, something sugary and sweet? Have you ever listened to christian music? Yes. Are you the 'creative child'?  I’m not creative at all.  Would you ever dye your hair pink? No. I like dyeing my hair red. Do you ever masturbate?  No. Are you embarassed about your sex life or lack there of? I’m not embarrassed about my non-existent sex life.  Who's the last person you said I love you to?  My mom. What's your stance on spooning?  I’ve honestly never done it, but seems nice and cute and comforting. To be honest; though, I get hot very easily so I don’t think I could do it for a long time haha. Have you ever seen a shooting star?  Nope. Have you ever been 'popular'?  Nope. And that’s perfectly fine with me. Has someone ever tried to convert you? Yes. Are you thin?  Yes. I’m actually underweight. Do you like big earrings?  No. Are you scared of your future? Yes. I’m terrified of what my future holds and now with everything going on, I’m really scared about what’s in store going forward. Are you a whiskey person? No. I don’t drink at all. Do you ever listen to oldies? Yeah. I like a variety of artists/bands from various genres and decades. Are you good at making conversation?  Nopeeee. Do you go on a lot of dates?  Ha, no. I haven’t been on one in years and I’ve only been on a few. Have you ever been told that you dress like a slut?  No. What's the best compliment you've ever recieved? Hmm.  Do you still watch cartoons?  I still watch Rugrats, Hey Arnold, and Doug. Are you a comic book geek? Nope. I’ve never read any.

When's the last time you had Starbucks? Early March sometime. The fact it’s been over a month since I’ve had it is a new record for me. Are you a fan of muffins?  Yeah. Banana muffins (without the walnut) are my favorite. Blueberry, lemon poppyseed, and cinnamon streusel are also delicious.  Did you just think of sex?  ...No? Have you ever heard of The Cranberries?  Yep. I love Zombie and Linger. What's your most recent obsession? I finally started Tiger King and I’m just about done. I’m not quite obsessed like a lot of people seem to be, but it is interesting. Are you feeling okay today?  Meh. Does anyone care?  I know my family does.