#ok but why am i actually kind of proud about this
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sheepthatgobaa · 3 months ago
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sleepover with the buddies.
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muttsandmustelidae · 5 months ago
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i regret to inform all of my fellow socially awkward kings that Practicing Talking Good actually helps. u have to make small talk at the grocery store sometimes to get better at speaking to people u don’t know very well. it sucks but if u keep trying it will eventually NOT suck and will in fact be fun and nice
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thepartyishere · 9 months ago
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This is long winded rant about Cogwheels by Akutagawa
I wrote this a while back in a fit of obsession over the irl Akutagawa (that will never go away). I'd consider it vague analysis/ summary and not 100% focused on the BSD character if that's what you're looking for. Tbh I'm practicing my analysis/ writing skills and I'm not very confident in them yet. All this warning, it's not actually that bad I think (hope), I just have high standards for myself.
Anyways this is for @twinksintrees who asked about it
PDF of Cogwheels by Akutagawa Ryunosuke that I used:
https://documents.pub/document/ryunosuke-akutagawa-cogwheels.html?page=1
Cogwheels is a fictional work by Akutagawa Ryunosuke, but it’s widely acknowledged to be a thinly veiled autobiography. It was written in 1927, the same year the author commits suicide. 
 The story follows the main character’s thought processes in his day to day life. The events that occur aren’t what captivates me, but the emotions and thought patterns described. The mood is consistently very alone, different, and other from the population. This feeling of otherness is furthered by the paranoia the main character is experiencing, which drives him away from the few people he knows and the various physical illnesses he struggles with. His thought patterns feel disjointed to the reader, containing lots of logical leaps. He'll notice a recurring theme or object, like seeing an airplane several times in different situations and become paranoid and obsessive over the meaning of it. Throughout the work these varying recurring themes seem random and unimportant to the reader until the climax in which the character goes on a walk and encounters each of the subjects of those recurring themes, which he had been perceiving as premonitions of insanity and death. The culmination of all the foreshadowed repetition and the subsequent breakdown he has as he believes he is dying breaks down the distance the reader feels to the illogical fears and thoughts. The paranoia becomes justified to an outside observer when it all comes together.
Cogwheels reflects Akutagawa’s deteriorating mental state, as he successfully committed suicide the same year it was written. According to his Wikipedia page, he had intensifying and persistent visual hallucinations throughout his life as well as anxiety. We’ll never know the specifics of his mental illness, but I believe liberties can be taken to apply the experiences of the main character in Cogwheels to its author as the story is mostly autobiographical. The main character’s thought patterns revealed what I interpreted as compulsions and possibly OCD (but I am not particularly knowledgeable on the subject), depression, paranoia and other symptoms I may not be able to diagnose. The way in which these experiences are written and the feelings the descriptions invoke could not have been done by someone who wasn’t experiencing those exact things. 
The story feels like a very honest look into how Akutagawa thought and his worldview. This was written as his struggles and illnesses (mental and physical) were coming to climax. Another detail that may be Akutagawa’s thoughts projected is that multiple times in the story the character wants to admit himself to a mental hospital, but, "to go there meant death to me." Akutagawa’s life was plagued by fear of inheriting his mother’s madness. She was admitted to a mental institution when he was very young. Toward the end of his life that fear only grew as well as, "a vague sense of anxiety about my own future," which is one main reason for his suicide, given in his suicide note.
Regarding suicide, I can't help but think of how Dazai and Akutagawa's roles are reversed in BSD as they are in real life. The author Dazai greatly looked up to Akutagawa and I wonder what he may have thought and felt reading the works of a similarly depressed author. He was very affected by Akutagawa's death, being around 18 when it happened (Akutagawa was 35). The authors really are very similar, their works known for being bleak. It’s as if everyone else can't see how horrible things are and they are uniquely miserable in the world. As I continue to learn about the two authors I hope to compare their similarities in writing style and lifestyle in more depth. 
Akutagawa also had connections to Junichiro, with whom he publicly disagreed over whether the content or the structure of a story is more important in writing. Akutagawa argued that structure, or how the story is told, is more important. Any relationships between the real life inspirations for the Bungou Stray Dogs characters interests me, and I find this opinion held by Akutagawa relevant to Cogwheels. The content of the story is the quite mundane and sad life of the character, while the descriptions of declining sanity and the emotions conveyed are what I believe make the work so compelling. I’d be interested in reading Junichiro’s work to compare how his preference for the content and plot of a story impacts his writing.
In Cogwheels, the character’s emotions are constantly being influenced by anything he may perceive as or relate to something negative. His “normal” thought patterns or casual day will be interrupted once he makes any sort of negative connection or suspicious observation. He will obsess over the meaning of it, spiraling into distress and anxiety. 
This is my favorite example of that:
""Asylum" was precisely what it was. I somehow felt something soothing in the rosy tint of the wall and relaxed at a table. Fortunately there were only a few other customers there. I sipped a cup of cocoa and started to drag on a cigarette, as usual. The smoke rose in a faint blue stream up the rosy wall. The harmonious mingling of the soft colors was agreeable to me. But after a time I discovered a portrait of Napoleon on the wall to my left and began to feel uneasy again. When Napoleon was only a student, he had written on the last page of his geography notebook: "Saint Akutagawa Helena, a small island." lt might have been, as we say, only a coincidence. But it must have made even Napoleon shiver eventually . . . Gazing at Napoleon, I thought about my own work. And there burst upon me certain phrases in A Fool's Life. (Especially the words, "Life is more hellish than hell itself.") And also the hero's fate in my Hell Screen-a painter called Yoshihide. Then.. smoking I looked around the cafe trying to escape such memories. I had taken shelter here no more than five minutes earlier. Already the place had undergone a complete change. What made me most uncomfortable was the fact that the chairs and tables of imitation mahogany did not go with the rosy walls. Afraid I should fall into an agony imperceptible to others, I tried to get out of the cafe by quickly tossing down a silver coin."
This passage shows how one thing (a painting of Napoleon) will remind him of something negative and cause a downward spiral that seems to contain leaps between subjects, and he becomes distressed. As a fan of the writing style, I especially notice and admire the way Akutagawa describes the color of the wall as soothing in the beginning, with pleasant imagery, then cites the colors of the furniture and walls as his greatest source of discomfort in the end of the passage. The character feels as though the very environment around him has turned against him, changing with his shifting moods. What was pleasant has become hostile, the outside mirroring his inner state.
The last paragraph of Cogwheels is something that has struck me since the first time I read it. It’s the character’s reaction to the climax of the story, in which he went on a walk and had a breakdown over the culmination of the recurring premonitions:
“It was the most frightening experience in my life- l haven't the strength to go on writing. lt is inexpressibly painful to live in such a frame of mind. lsn't there anyone to come and strangle me quietly in my sleep?”
I am reminded of what Asagiri said in an interview: “This story (Bungou Stray Dogs) is not for people who are good at living.” Akutagawa was also arguably not good at living, which creates a connection between the inspiration for the manga character and its reader that fascinates me. 
As much as I describe the thought patterns and paranoia in Cogwheels as something somewhat foreign, something experienced by someone who was nearing the end and reaching the height of their lifelong mental illness, I find some familiarity in it. Akutagawa was far from good at living and the lack of control and fear I sense in his life and in this story resonate with me. I’m drawn to the hopeless tone of his works and the tragedies of his life. 
Sources and Further Info:
Akutagawa’s Wikipedia page
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ry%C5%ABnosuke_Akutagawa
Some of his childhood and analysis/ comparison to Edgar Allen Poe
https://www.washburn.edu/reference/bridge24/Akutagawa.html
BSD Wiki for some of the relationship between author Dazai and Akutagawa
https://bungostraydogs.fandom.com/wiki/Real-life_References
A partial translation of the Asagiri interview  (@Popopretty1 on Twitter)
https://twitter.com/Popopretty1/status/16634469970163916
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undermostcorgi · 8 months ago
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the media which consumes your entire soul at age 12 will forever be a part of you. this is an unavoidable consequence of living and you have to accept this fact. no matter how old you get, no matter how long it has been since you last saw its smug face peeking out from the bushes as it follows you, no matter if you think you have outrun it for good and that you're finally finally safe and you hardly even remember it exists anymore and your brain knows a few brief moments of true peace, it WILL catch up to you in your moment of weakness. and listen you don't want to hear this but sometimes this is necessary for your mental health. you will on instinct want to reject it and run away again but sometimes. sometimes you just need to watch that old show or listen to that silly song or read that weird book again as an adult and it will hurt you a little bit in various little ways but it will also heal you a little bit. you can call it nostalgia you can call it connecting with your inner child or whatever you want but just listen to me it WILL HAPPEN TO YOU TOO AT SOME POINT AND YOU HAVE TO BE PREPARED FOR THIS (i am forcibly dragged off the stage by security)
#heed my warning boy#it seems i am not well today#recently made the reluctant decision to revisit what was probably my VERY FIRST real hyperfixation#something that i don't necessarily want to mention by name right now because. well#its pretty objectively bad LOL like i dont think i know of ANYONE still posting about it or really proud of having liked it back in the day#i dont think it is as well known to the general public so it wont get me hunted down for sport even if i did name it probably hopefully#but for those who know its. probably not the best thing to be revisiting lmao (even though i think it might still be being made?? wtf)#but i felt i had to because i was about to start my period and was going crazy insane like you do you know how it is#and i randomly remembered a fanfic i loved and then remembered my fav character and how much i loved him#my actual first ever blorbo oh my GOD he was everything to me#so i reluctantly decided to rewatch “just the first few episodes” just to see how much i remembered and also to prove to myself it sucks#but surprise surprise: nostalgia and hormones are making me actually kind of enjoy it#and now i am suffering from fucking Catholic-like Guilt for not hating it which i think is pretty silly lmao#so im kind of posting this in an attempt to convince myself that its like. FINE and cringe is dead and all that#and that sometimes i gotta be nice to my little mentally ill brain and give it the junk food (bad media) it craves#ESPECIALLY when im on my period LMAO#anyway completely unrelated: why the FUCK do i still remember almost every single fucking word to the delicious tomato song SDHJFKSAJF#i hope no one actually reads this far in the tags bc i know that reveal will probably deal psychological damage to some of you LMAO SORRYYY#ok yeah posting this and then immediately going to bed so that the Haters cant reach me LOL SEE YA
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ingydar-phan · 3 months ago
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Ok I do want to chime in on the convo but actually this is gonna be really long because I’ve been planning to make a huge post about this since the tour trailer came out. Like genuinely I messaged some people asking for tips on how to make a big conversation post weeks ago and then just never did it. So here goes I guess.
I am a firm believer they are going to hard launch soon. In some way shape or form. Before tour starts. That is a stance I have held ever since I watched pizza mukbang 2. And I have explanations.
My main points come from the coming out parallel surrounding Dans internalized homophobia and trauma responses and fear of rejection (more on that later), and also my hypothesized “3 stages” of the gaming channel revival.
I believe that when the gaming channel was revived, starting with the Heartthrob video, they entered stage 1: experimenting with audiences desire for a return to content. This was a phase they themselves discussed in Dans Birthday Stream and in Pizza Mukbang 2. The first few months were experimenting with what a new audience would look like and how much they were wanted, in what contexts, and what kind of content. I also think this wraps into the dynamic difference between Dan and Phil as people. Note, I love them both dearly and want nothing but the best for them both. It has been made clear that they did very different things during the hiatus, with Phil initiating the gaming channel comeback. Before Dan came out, he was under an immense feeling of guilt and pressure, even by his own mind. He had the option of leaving the internet forever, and he certainly considered it. Finish off the gaming channel, go on one last tour, and leave. Never having to adress anything again. But he didn’t do that. He came back. He came out. And he was greeted with the kindest, warmest, most accepting response. And he did work! He wrote a book! He went on a solo tour! And to echo both Dan himself and all of the community, he needed this. He needed this time of healing and this era of self discovery. He wouldn’t be who he is today without it, and I’m so proud of him.
But Phil? Oh Phil was just cruising along. That’s not at all to discredit any form of hardship Phil went through, but it certainly wasn’t the same. Phil was making content before Dan was, back in 2006. In uni, Phil was comfortable in his sexuality (or some form of queerness). But he waited. He waited to come out until Dan was ready. Because he’s a wonderful partner. He was happy continuing Amazingphil regardless of hiatus, of Dans needs, because he knew he didn’t have to pressure Dan into anything he didn’t want or wasn’t ready for. And then, presumably when Dan was ready, Phil proposed a gaming channel comeback. Just try it out, just see how it feels, low commitment. And what happened? Once again, they were showered with love and adoration and support and acceptance. Was the fandom different than how it used to be? Absolutely. But it was beautiful and loving. So that’s stage 1. Experimenting with content and viewership and re-entering the branding of Dan and Phil (Games).
Then, I believe after stage 1 came stage 2. Experimenting with audience reaction to Dan and Phil as a couple. I want to stake my claim here that everything they do is meticulously curated. Sure, Phil’s toe popping out of his sock wasn’t purposeful, but it was certainly handled intentionally. They’re extremely seasoned creators, and everything they do is for a reason. (That’s why I love rpf hehe). This, my “stage 2”, is when they were dipping their toes more into phan stuff. The orange heart. The “gay” community tab. Using the “ph-“ prefix THEMSELVES a lot more. Dab and Evan comparisons. This was the middle ground. How would people react? Would they turn away because it’s too much? Would they begin stalking and creeping all over again? Or would they accept these people for what they are. As much as people like to think Dan and Phil are just silly whimsical guys who are perfect no matter what they do (which is accurate as well tbf), they also know what they’re doing. They do these things on purpose to gauge audience reaction, to see how people feel about it. As others have said, what we see publicly is just a tiny sliver of their real life. Yea, even the domestic videos. It’s curated. And it’s wonderful. It’s so endearing they choose to share these things. Even in times of uncertainty. But that uncertainty was met with absolute acceptance.
Which is how we get into stage 3. I think “stage 3” started developing around the time of Dans Birthday Stream, but really actually started when the tour trailer was posted, and then all the videos after that (pizza mukbang, dressing each other, chained together, tiktoks, etc etc). So, very recently. But something shifted. Maybe it’s in the air, maybe it’s just me, maybe we all need to go outside. But something shifted. Dan and Phil, but especially Dan, saw how they were being accepted and took that as an affirmation. An affirmation that everything is going to be okay. They can commit now. They can go full on. Full hard launch.
I think everyone has a different definition of hard launch, and even I think it varies by context. But what I mean here is not necessarily them making some video called “Dan and Phil are romantically together” and staring at the camera with a gun to their head. It doesn’t, and shouldn’t, have to be that.
Straight people get this privilege of being assumed straight without having to “come out”. They get this comfort of having relationships without having to scream it in everyone’s faces.
And I do indeed agree with what people mean when they say they have already hard launched. They’re husbands, soulmates, 4000 year old tortoises, “basically any other gay couple”, more than just romantic, yea. I get it. But people are fucking stupid. Non-queer people don’t understand nuance, and need everything handed to them on a silver platter. Dan and Phil are together. People who try to twist and turn to try and “prove” they’re anything but a committed romantic and sexual relationship are ignorant at best, but mainly using homophobic wishful thinking. However, there’s more to go. There’s a reason we’re all “terrified” for what is to come. Because everything, the past 15 years of all of our lives, of their life, is coming together. It’s genuinely beautiful.
So what do I mean by hard launch then? Well, I mean a lack of censorship (besides what’s reasonable. Though we’d all love to see them fuck on YouTube, I’m not sure that’s happening any time soon). I mean a lack of shame. A lack of hiding. And it’s already begun. That’s what I feel stage 3 to be and have been. In pizza mukbang 2, they say things such as “cheers dear”, which is intentional. The “gay uncles” and the “kneeing” is all intentional. It’s not just throwaway jokes, it’s them looking us in the eyes and saying “we see you”. I have a whole list of stage 3 things. The intentional Incohearant cards. The “my face hurts from smiling” comments. THE HANDS ON THE SHOULDER TO THE HAND ON THE KNEE. Them being so open about their secluded romantic holiday. The relentless Phil bottom jokes. The yaoi day tweet from the outfits video. The “who would jump for you like that dog jumped for that man” “you”. It’s all there. It’s all intentional. And I’m so grateful for it.
One of my mutuals who I talked about this with (not gonna name cuz idk if they want me to) talked about their theory that DNP have given barely any info about tour because it requires some form of hard launch to preface it. And honestly? I didn’t even realize that was a theory. I sort of already accepted that as fact. How open IS the door gonna be?
So yea, I hope this makes sense. Please feel free to respond with or send asks of any nuances or questions or theories you’d like to add. I don’t intend this to be shaming anyone who thinks differently. Even if I may vehemently disagree with someone in my head, I don’t think these people are evil or malicious or objectively bad or deserving of hate. These are just my thoughts. I’ll likely be adding more. Thanks for reading.
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sso-maev · 16 days ago
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Ok so remember this map?
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A complete map of Jorvik, with a semi-accurate scale to measure any distance on the island. I’m really proud of it! There is, however, one glaring problem with this map.
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WHY IS JORVIK CITY SO SMALL????
I’m sorry but Jorviks capital should not be smaller than middle-of-nowhere ranger town Dundull. The generally accepted minimum population requirements for a city are 50 000 residents. Following the canon map, Jorvik city would need to fit at least 50 000 people in what looks like 2,25 square miles. That would mean Jorvik city houses 22 222 people per square mile, making it the 24th most densely populated city in the WORLD.
Possible? Sure. Likely? Considering the clear inspiration from the way less dense Stockholm, the lack of giant apartment complexes or slum neigbourhoods, which would imply that people live closely together, I’m gonna have to say no.
So how big should Jorvik city be, if the map size is inaccurate? Kind of hard to tell since we can’t see places like Governors Fall or Aideens Plaza on the map.
But there is one place we CAN see.
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And if we can use this map, we can measure how long it takes to cross it.
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I am very normal about the horse game.
From the barracks to the pier, it takes 38 seconds to cross the map. On a similarly flat surface on Jorvik, we can measure how long Pier 13 actually is, giving us this comparison.
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Now, I’m going to show two theories on how big Jorvik City is based on these measurements.
The first one is the most canon-compliant, but also the most ridiculous. By comparing pier 13 to the area outside jorvik stables, we know that pier 13 is ~1 km long. Yes, this is an absolutely massive pier don’t worry about it. Looking at the jorvik city map, we can see that this smaller pier is meant to be to represent Pier 13, and we can do the math from there. Jorvik gets an area of 340 square km, and if we use Stockholms population density as a guide, Jorvik City has about 1,8 million citizens. Cool! One problem though.
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You can’t fit it on the map. A city this big would take up almost one fourth of Jorvik, and you’d need to redraw the entire map to make it fit.
So my other option shifts the canon a bit to make the maps fit together. If we go against canon and assume that Pier 13 is actually the larger pier, that downsizes Jorvik City to ~47,5 square kilometres, with a population of around 250 000. This makes Jorvik more comparable to a more densely populated Reykjavik; smaller in area but with double the amount of people. And while it still messes with the coastline a bit, it at least fits into Central Bay.
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Personally I think both theories work, but for consistency’s sake, I’m leaning more towards the second theory.
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silksongeveryday · 9 months ago
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Drawing Hornet everyday until Silksong comes out - Day 365!
1 year! One whole year of daily doodles!!
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Honestly?? Idk how to feel, so much has happened since I first started this blog.
I guess I’ll just write what I’m thinking right now??
(Everything under the cut, this thing is longer than I expected)
A lot of this text probably isn’t going to make sense. I’m writing this at 1 am. If there’s any mistakes or errors that’s why. I’ll fix them in the morning maybe.
So like. This whole thing kinda started as a joke, I wasn’t intending to actually draw for a year straight lmao. Like I even used a completely different art style from my regular one that was simple, quick and intentionally dumb. Not that I’m upset by it, I’m actually quite proud of myself that I managed to stick to something for an entire year. That’s pretty unusual for me believe it or not. My original intention was to stop at maybe 20 days because I really wasn’t expecting for this blog to get as much love as it did.
So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so so much to everyone who has followed and supported this silly little idea I had, you guys are the biggest reason my experience has been so positive and worth it. (Sure it’s not original but I hope it’s at least been interesting!)
I’ve said this a few times now but I’ve mentioned wanting to take a break. I’ll admit that even though it’s been fun it’s still pretty tiring to keep up with this blog sometimes since some recent life events have made it so hard. After some thought, I’ve decided that I’ll likely take a break sometime in the coming months. Maybe toward day 400 or so. As of right now, things are at a lull so I’ve been okay enough mentally and physically to keep up this daily streak I think. Though this could change in an instant for whatever reason.
Overall I think my burnout has kind of gone away I think?? Or at least I’ve been reinvigorated recently after replaying a few runs of hk randomizer and steel soul. No promises it’ll stay away but I silly expect it to come in waves.
Ok but call me crazy or delusional or whatever, but my hopes are up that Silksong will release this year. (which means slowing down/not doing daily doodles yay) I genuinely believe big news is coming since I’ve been getting a lot of dreams lately about something happening with Silksong in March. Idk, I could be wrong but after doing this for a year I’m literally clinging onto anything right now lol
I’d obviously still make the occasional doodle or two when HKSS releases but not daily. This stuff is tough to keep up sometimes, I would never do daily posts like this again once it’s over
Oh yeah also I have an actual big drawing I’m still working on, expect that in sometime in the next few weeks I think!
Anyway, I can’t think of anything else to say right now so I guess that’s it for now!
Thanks so much and here’s to more doodles!
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cieloclercs · 8 months ago
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what would you say (if i told you i love you)? — charles leclerc
PART: 7/7 (read part 6 here)
summary. in which childhood best friends blur the lines between what they’ve always known, and something more
warnings. angsty but with a lil catharsis at the end (yes it’s a happy ending i’m too weak to keep the angst up 😔) swearing as per, your bestie and charles SCHEMING, y/n being a teenyyy bit annoying but it’s fine she’s heartbroken we accept it 😚
pairing. charles leclerc x artsy!reader
face claim. tara michelle
author’s note. FINAL PART!! it’s been a long time coming (sorry about that sixth form’s been kicking my ass 😔) but thank you to everyone that has been interacting with this series! i love and appreciate you all sooooo much!! 🫶 anywaysss i hope you guys enjoy the finale of what would you say (if i told you i love you)? 💗
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yourusername happier than ever 🩶
view all comments…
username me when i lie:
username y/n baby you’re not fooling anyone with that caption 🫠
username ok billie eilish
username y/n may be a boss ass bitch but when you’ve been best friends with a guy since you were 5 years old AND you were in love with that guy it’s gonna fucking hurt.
username it’s so weird to me that everyone says she loved him like they confirmed anything? they were literally just friends 😑
username that may be so, but when two people look at each other the way y/n and charles do there’s NO WAY they’re just friends…
yourfriend you know there’s something called taking my advice maybe you should try it sometime 😃
username erm hello?? excuse me??
username what’s going on here then? 😳
arthur_leclerc sure you are ☺️
username the SHADE 😭
username arthur is truly one of us 🫡
username i want her and charles to make up NOT because i think she should forgive him but because she’s clearly miserable and denying herself a chance to be happy ☹️
username why does this feel like a cry for help
username i miss the old y/n 😢
username shut up she’s still y/n 🙄 don’t be one of those girls, people are allowed to change !!
username PREACH
leclerc_pascale ma fille pour toujours / my girl forever 💗
yourusername 🫶
username hey y/n! if you are truly happy then i am so proud of you <3 but i know that sometimes say things to hide the pain they’re actually feeling. what i’m trying to say is please don’t think you need to act as if you’re doing great all the time! we all love and support you no matter what, and all we want is for you to be happy! 💗
yourusername i think this is the sweetest comment i’ve ever received?? 🥹 thank you so so much for your kind words and for checking in! i love you ❤️
username crying this is the purest interaction on this app i’ve ever seen 🥲
username username PREACH!! this is the kind of energy all y/n fans should be having right now!!
username username no truer words have ever been spoken! yourusername we’re here for you no matter what! 🫶
*yourusername liked this comment
charles_leclerc all i want is for you to be happy.
*charles_leclerc deleted this comment
username CHARLES WE SAW THAT
username he really thinks he’s slick 😭
username we all saw the charles comment right?? i didn’t hallucinate it?? 😀
username how was it up for less than a minute and yet we literally all saw it 😭
username lol it’s expose charles day
username he really thought he could hide from us 🙄 rookie mistake
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f1gossip BREAKING! Charles Leclerc and Y/F/N, best friend of Y/N Y/L/N spotted together in Monaco! Do we smell a backstabber? 👀
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username YOU WHAT NOW
username THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING
username i actually have no words.
username oh 😃
username guys it might not be what it looks like!! we don’t know the whole story
username well it looks pretty incriminating to me…
username i knew she was a fake little bitch 🤢
username RIGHT?? i’ve always said it and no one ever listened to me!!
username she’s definitely jealous of y/n 🙄
username you guys sound so pathetic right now you don’t even know the whole story??
username right all the fake y/n fans talking shit about y/f/n need to SHUT THE FUCK UP.
username LITERALLY the switch up is insane 🫠
username yes!! first of all no one knows the full story, and second y/f/n has been nothing BUT supportive of y/n throughout this whole situation! switching up on her now is really unfair ☹️
yourfriend this is unbelievable. f1gossip you have no right to post this without any understanding of the full story.
username yourfriend stop trying to play innocent we all now you’re a fake backstabbing skank 🤮
username username if you can’t think for yourself without trusting everything the TABLOIDS tell you then just do us all a favour and shut the fuck up 🥰
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yourusername
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responses:
yourfriend thank you, y/n
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f1gossip Charles Leclerc spotted with a HUGE bouquet of flowers outside Y/N Y/L/N’s apartment in Monaco! Is reconciliation on the cards? 👀
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username OH MY GOD IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING
username CODE RED 🚨🚨 THIS IS NOT A DRILL GUYS I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
username charles i am PRAYING that you don’t fuck this up i need my otp back together 🙏🙏🙏
username he’s finally come to his senses
username NOW THAT’S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT
username y/n girlie for the love of god you better not shoot him down after all this 😔🙏
username after all of what? a bouquet of flowers? he needs to try a bit harder than that 🙄
username have you not seen him grovelling AT HER FEET for the last six weeks 😀
username tbh if charles leclerc turned up at my door with flowers i’d melt. no matter how angry i was 🤷‍♀️
arthur_leclerc FINALLY
username ARTHUR 😭
username arthur bestie what are you doing here 😭
username he’s so us
username he stans charlesy/n just as much as we do 🫶
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one week later…
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liked by charles_leclerc and 647,937 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername i’d say i love you too ❤️‍🩹
view all comments…
charles_leclerc thank you for giving me a second chance, mon amour ❤️
yourusername always 💫💗
charles_leclerc i love you so so much
charles_leclerc i’m the luckiest man in the world
yourusername aw charlie 🥹
username such a SIMP
username simp charles is my favourite charles
username oh he IN LOVE in love 🫠
username hold up so everyone was talking shit about y/f/n but the whole time she was actually plotting to get charles and y/n back together… 😳
username yep…everyone say sorry and thank you y/f/n right now!
username sorry yourfriend and thank you for doing god’s work 😔🙏
yourfriend you’re welcome guys ☺️
arthur_leclerc DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT
arthur_leclerc ELEVEN FUCKING YEARS
arthur_leclerc I DESERVE COMPENSATION FOR EVERY TIME I’VE HAD TO LISTEN TO YOU TWO PINE OVER EACH OTHER BUT NEVER DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT
yourusername way to expose us arth 😔
charles_leclerc sorry? 😃
username CRYING ARTHUR IS SO DONE WITH THEIR SHIT
username arthur is the true winner in this situation 😭
username bless his poor charlesy/n heart 😔
username yourusername charles_leclerc LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO THE POOR MAN. YOU’VE BROKEN HIM
joris_trouche it’s about damn time
yourusername ok lizzo
username THIS IS SO ADORABLE IM SOBBING
username FINALLY
username THIS IS ALL I’VE EVER WANTED. THAT’S IT MY LIFE IS COMPLETE
username ok but did you NEED to put us through all that pain? 😅
username it’s called character building bestie! we survived the charlesy/n friendship breakup so now we can get through anything! 😃
username the first picture 🥹🥹
leclerc_pascale Ma belle future fille / my beautiful future daughter 💗😉
charles_leclerc maman 🤦‍♂️
arthur_leclerc just propose already you’ve been saying you want to marry her since you were sixteen
charles_leclerc ARTHUR
yourusername CRYING 😭
yourfriend ARTHUR YOU DID NOT 😭😭
username IM SCREAMING ARTHUR WHY WOULD YOU EXPOSE HIM LIKE THAT
username poor charles can’t say anything without arthur exposing him 😔
landonorris i better be invited to the wedding 😏
carlossainz55 me too! 😘
charles_leclerc absolutely not.
yourusername landonorris carlossainz55 ignore him! of course you’re invited 😃
scuderiaferrari Our favourite couple ❤️
yourusername 🥰🫶
username even ferrari’s a charlesy/n fan
scuderiaferrari username *Biggest fan 😉
lorenzotl congrats to my favourite sibling (and charles) 😚
yourusername love you enzo ☺️💕
charles_leclerc rude??? 😒
username i love how they left us in suspense for a whole week after that gossip post and only NOW decided to confirm it ☺️☺️
username ROLL THE DAMN CREDITS.
taglist: @cxcewg @incoherenciass @formula1mount @allywthsr @meabhcavanagh @driveswiftly13 @zzblooda @gaslysainz @be-your-coffee-pot @siovhanroy @hwienv @xoxozoedagyal @alireads27 @glow-ish @eviethetheatrefreak @nmw-am @buendiabebeta @laneyspaulding19 @imthebadguyyy @marialovesf1 @f1wintermoon13 @topaz125 @aundercover @sainzluvrr @sunny44 @justdreamersdream @lordperceval-16 @needtokeepfeelingsincheck @midnightappleade @remuslupinsbitch @taylorslovesswifties13 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @lillianacristina @lifeless-firefly @bbygrlllllll @405rry @1655clean @drthymby @ang-26 @dhe3reads @mishaandthebrits @caitdaniels @missenclod @lovely-blackinnon @smnthnclj @sofs16 @dark-night-sky-99 @c3leste888 @christcat @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @cixrosie
thank you all so much for the love on this series! i’m going to miss it 🥲
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rizzanon · 1 year ago
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[Biceps] Leon S. Kennedy
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Warnings: Suggestive talk, slight swearing, reader has a choking kink (asphyxiation)
" ....Excuse me?"
"I know you heard what I said. Don't pretend you didn't."
You really had no shame at all, asking your boyfriend the most ridiculous thing he's ever heard.
"You want me to... choke you with my biceps? Seriously?"
"Oh come on! You can't blame me for asking that, you know..! Just—Just look at them!" You exclaimed, as you gestured towards Leon's massive biceps. Leon deadpanned at you, and you rolled your eyes.
"Ok, give me one reason why you can't choke me out then." You asked, as you crossed your arms and faced Leon.
"You can't be fucking serious, love—"
"Oh but I am!" You protested, with a smug look on your face. You almost looked proud to say that. You watched as Leon sighed, exasperated, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Well, first of all, I might actually kill you if I choke you out—"
"That's kind of hot not gonna lie."
Leon was now glaring at you, and you just laughed it off. "I'm just kidding. Well, kind of. But I guess you have a point."
"Exactly." Leon heaved out, slightly relieved that this conversation was over. Or so he thought.
" .... but are you sure you can't... I don't know... choke me out a tad bit..?"
"Love." Leon retorts, a little too sternly, and you put your hands up in defeat.
"Alright, alright! I'll stop. I just wanted to know how it'd feel. That's all." You murmured, as you started poking Leon's biceps with a pout on your face. When he wasn't tensing his muscles, his arms felt so squishy and soft.
Seeing you pout pulled Leon's heart strings, which made him pull you closer to him, and hug you from behind. He pressed a kiss along the crook of your neck, before whispering in your ear, "I'll... think about it. I just don't want to hurt you, love."
Your eyes lit up with excitement after hearing his words, and you turned to face Leon, pecking a kiss on his lips, elated.
"I knew you'd give in to me." You say gleefully, a grin tugging at your lips, and Leon chuckled, amused.
"You know I can never resist you."
.
.
.
"So... can we try it out now?"
".... No."
m.list
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immoralimmortals · 6 months ago
Note
I READ THEM TAGS OFFER EM UP MY LEIGE I NEED MARRIAGE HEADCANONS FOR THE AKATSUKI
(EDIT: this is by far my most popular post! If you like this, I have a longform akatsuki x reader fic pinned on my blog and linked here!)
You water my crops and put the stars in the sky. I'm madly in love with you. I'm bringing this post to your feet much like a cat does their favorite toy. I have caught it. Be proud of me, mother.
Even if it's less about the whole life of being married and more about the actual act of marrying, hope that's ok!
Akatsuki Marriage Headcanons, for real this time:
Pain:
I am a huge proponent of the popular fanon opinion that if this man takes you so seriously as to express a label for it (love, spouse, etc.), he is at the brink of worshiping your feet. Don't get me wrong, in terms of the arrangement of proposal and marriage ceremony, the leader is still in charge; however, he is dictating with every detail painstakingly about you. If there is decor, it is your favorite color. If you expressed you like a certain gemstone, he tracks it down for proposal and gets the finest cut upon your finger. You don't want an actual wedding? No problem, you're just going to come home to several thousand lit candles and a profession of commitment as deep from his heart as a corpse is in the grave.
The idea is that it is necessary for this bond to be formalized, at least for his own sake. Pain would refer to it as something you need to hear. If he is nothing else, he is serious about whatever he experiences emotionally; that goes for both his immense suffering and his most delicate of joys. He declares you his, neigh: commands...but only after you assure him yes.
If a traditional proposal is done, it must be in private. He dares not be too exposed. It's already so much that he has become vulnerable to you.
It is a hard privilege to earn. And so, the Akatsuki leader pays you back in kind. As long as you both shall live, you are his deity. You will never want, not as long as he is allowed to bask in you.
Pain kisses you firmly, one hand on your wrist and one on your back. You are to feel both his presence and his commitment.
A wedding song for you: Take me to Church by Hozier (yes I am a sucker for this song, yes yes and yes) or Ship in a Bottle by fin
Konan:
All at once, her heart aches in the best and worst ways, as it is such a curse of the Akatsuki to have had their loves taken too soon. Up till this point, she has been passive, letting you lead the relationship, but now- despite how much she yearns for the same- the angel stands her ground.
"Why?" you ask her in retaliation. She's thin-lipped as she refuses the real answer. It takes a couple tries over a few, staggered moments in private for the truth to tumble out:
She does not want another person she loves to die because of her. It's irrational; your death is not predetermined by the commitment. And yet it remains. She is scared, and the closer you get the more she stings.
But you have to press closer. You have to assure, promise, fight your way back into her heart as it tries to close you out in self protection. You succeed, thanks to one of the reasons you adore Konan: her capacity to hope, no matter the circumstance. Reminder her of that, and she can only be yours.
The wedding is small, the two of you and whomever you deem precious enough to witness. (I imagine probably not even a full handful). It is twilight and the color of the world is shaded blue. Blue as her hair, blue as she feels whenever you're away, blue in the same way the purest of whites are to the human eye. You are pristine. The paper that folds the bouquets that drape around you are spotless and glow in the moonlight in such a way they're almost lanterns. Their starkly pale and crisply folded nature surround as if it is her prayer that everything that is good may stay that way.
Konan kisses you in such a way that no part of you but your lips touch one another. It is chaste, it is soft, it is a seal.
A wedding song for you: Saturn by Sleeping at Last (I cry every single time I hear this in full. I sincerely think there are few songs that have so viscerally touched me like this one has.) or Soul Meets Body by Death Cab for Cutie
Obito:
You cannot get his single-mindedness off of Rin. There is no way around it, and anything meant as distraction will not only fail but backfire on you. Therefore, if you are this deep into a partnership, you are there not in spite of her but thanks to her. You will be compared and contrasted to no end; this is not cruel, it is merely how he shapes his worldview in regards to goodness and love. You are his second chance. You are his solitude.
You don't get opportunity to propose. He will tell you first.
It is every definition of a ceremony, almost ritualistic, almost like they're crowning a king/queen. The ceilings are tall and decorated with the visage of ancestors and gods. Incense is lit and the setting sun sets the room on fire with orange and red. You are presented to him, ornate in the way he demands. A masked face cannot hide the lust and satisfaction in his voice. His hand reaches out, and you take it. For perhaps the first time, the mask is tilted to hide from their audience while still showing his scarred face to you.
His kiss is hard. Not sloppy, but hard. His hand is on the back of your head, and he going to press you into him until your soul enters his body.
A wedding song for you: Come Along by Cosmo Sheldrake or Sick of Losing Soulmates by dodie
Bad relationship songs because I can't control myself: Anybody Else by Dom Fera (THE song of all time for me, I love it) or Sex with a Ghost by Teddy Hyde
Zetsu:
Marriage? That's a fascinating concept. He's never had the desire for this kind of relationship before, but as you talk more and more of it, the more he grasps. In the end, it is a concept that matters to you, and he can appreciate the sentiment of it.
The weirdest part, honestly, is that you reserved such a thing for him.
Though he follows along (you must guide the entire arrangement), he quietly, curiously doubts the whole time. But your guiding hand is so soft as you take him and lead, so nice onto his skin as you select two rings and slide one on each color of hand. You make no mistake: it is both you are marrying. It is both you are committing to. That recognition is his first step into a hesitant acceptance of your eternal love.
When the time comes, you walk him to the first place you met, beside a large tree in a clearing with no human settlement in sight. None of the "don't see the bride/groom" tradition, it has no room here. Any amount of people you want are there, regardless of if it is everyone or no one. (He would prefer no one, but this is all for you, after all). As you're about to kiss him, he makes one request. It is the only thing Zetsu has asked for in all of this time:
Let him taste you.
How can you tell him no?
So his bi-colored lips part, taking your bottom lip into his first, and then rounded teeth gently drag the flesh into his mouth. Pressure is applied and you taste your blood, though fleetingly as he drinks it in. In all the time you've known him, this is the closest Zetsu has ever been to you. In this symbolic action, you have finally gained his full and complete trust.
Zetsu's kiss is metallic but it is not cold. It is pensive, meditative, doing his best to understand that which you crave, and so he does his best to crave you. He cups your face in both of his ringed hands so he need not focus on anything but your taste.
A wedding song for you: & by Tally Hall or Yes to Err is Human, So Don't Be One by Will Wood
Hidan:
At first he's going to make fun of you. He's going to tell you that this is the dumbest idea he's ever heard. And when you go quiet and don't bring it up again, he is going to pin you down and demand to be told why you changed your mind.
This man wants you so much, he can't fathom it. What is marriage if you must slaughter your neighbor? Well...a lover is a step above neighbor, isn't it?
Thank Jashin he doesn't need to kill you to get married.
If you do a traditional wedding, he will drag his feet but he will do it. It's to your detriment alone, really, how obnoxious he'd be. If you pin a flower to his lapel, he'll rip it off. He'll spit to the side in disgust at any mushy gushy talk done in front of others in this bastardization of another religion's ritual. This isn't a real ceremony. Let him show you what a wedding really is:
It's going to end up with your blood on his body and his blood on yours. He makes you straddle his lap, in the middle of the symbol of his lord that he's drawn upon the floor. The same sigil is dangled from a chain, his necklace held between you, from your view right between his intense violet eyes. The metal is cold as it plays a barrier between your lips and his.
Hidan's kiss is reverent. If this Jashinist is marrying you, he fucking means it. Do more than tolerate the cut a knife makes into your palm; pray to it.
...And then he will pray to you.
A wedding song for you: I Wanna Be Your Slave by Maneskin or Misanthrapologist by Will Wood
Bad relationship song I can't help but add: This is Love by Air Traffic Controller
Kakuzu:
Despite popular belief, this is not a man who fusses over money the way Scrooge does over every last coin. By the contrary, it is that he is a man that does not have much to give. This is in every sense, it turns out. Kakuzu is a man that has had all hope in humanity and for himself beat the hell out of him, so it's a shock to him if you hint at a desire for marriage. A mistake, that's what you're trying to make, here. At first he'll rebuff with few words but still sure, but it'll hitch onto him like a tick. A traditional man at heart, you know best to let him propose himself.
And so he does. It is the only time you've ever seen him doubt himself, but of course you tell him yes. As you throw your arms around him, that's when reality hits in the best of ways.
He does not wait, not if you don't oppose him. He takes you to a temple, middle of nowhere with no one either of you or your nations will know. For an old man, it's such a romantic, young man's task to arrange to elope. The priest marries you, as you sit side by side at the break of dawn upon his stoop. He wears his mask, still wears long robes to cover his stitches, but his silky brown hair drifts so beautifully with the wind; he will say this compliment is one he had of you and yours, when he looks back upon today. You are his world, intertwined in an immortal and mortal life.
Kakuzu does not kiss you at the wedding. That comes later, when no one else is there. He pulls down his mask and takes your mouth upon his, tangled until one of you can't breathe anymore.
A wedding song for you: Vanilla Curls by Teddy Hyde or Budapest by George Ezra
Deidara:
A flirt he may be, but a guy of commitment? Hell no. At first he's really flattered, chuckling and letting a large smirk trail up one side of his face. It falls when he realizes you're being serious. "Wait, really?" You nod, and his always-intense stare seems a bit closer to concerned.
"My dear...you're getting carried away, aren't you?" he offers like a second chance to not embarrass yourself.
Everything, as it always has for Deidara, has happened so fast it hits him before he recognizes what it is. Love is included, even and up until the point he's in this deep. Honestly? It terrifies him. He'll laugh and walk away, but it'll fucking haunt him.
A couple days of flying on a bird, all by his lonesome, and he returns with a bit of a different view. Life is short, beauty is fleeting: the opportunity is here and damned if he don't take it. He offers your hand- both in marriage and for a ride- and you soar into the sky.
There's no such thing as a traditional wedding, no need for it when the most beautiful things in the world are you and his art. Explosions and fireworks alike light up the night sky and he leans over to whisper his dedication upon your lips.
Deidara's kiss is, of course, bombastic. It's intense and with tongue and repeats, over and over, never lasting too long as he can't keep his love-drunk words to himself for longer than two seconds. Streamers and confetti flutter around your heads, grander than any parade for any newly wed prince or princess.
A wedding song for you: The Cult of Dionysus by The Orion Experience or Fear and Delight by The Correspondents
Sasori:
Only someone who knows him as well as you will pick up the subtlest shifts of the scorpion's expression, the way brown eyes barely widen. You bring it up, nearly like a dream you had, nearly like you're talking to yourself in your sleep, but he hears it. Sasori continues with his work, the monotony of woodwork allowing him to chew on the idea. A marriage isn't necessary, of course...but he also will lie to himself about how downright alluring the symbolism of a wedding is.
If the most beautiful things are eternal, why not your love?
If you've gotten him so far that Sasori will consider whatever form of affection he can manage in his barely organic heart, then he will make every second of your life never-ending bliss.
He decorates you, almost like one of his dolls, in the finest patterns of fabric and sleekest of jewelry. He pains over every inch of skin on top of muscle and bone, the way the ring slips on your finger and the way your wrist bends to do it. The ritual is an art piece, and you gaze upon him so marvelously... Your lips part with such slight but sure poise...
The venue is silent and you both are alone. Not even a bird caws, no insect chirps. Pure, clear as glass silence. You are the only two beings in all of existence. You will ascend time itself. A single candle is lit as you sit in the deepest depths of this cave, where no one may interrupt.
Where no one can hear him confess to you.
Sasori's kiss is soft, far too soft. He holds both of your hands so delicately, like they're on a string. Lines of chakra help you move into him in a way that is just right, just utterly perfect.
A wedding song for you: Thumbnail by Louie Zong and Brian David Gilbert or Dark of the Matinee by Franz Ferdinand
Kisame:
Shockingly enough, this guy is going to be your hardest sell. Perhaps predictably, it isn't because he dislikes marriage, settling down, falling in love. Disliking and opposing are very different things.
He panics, at least just a little the first time you mention it. "I'm a shinobi, you know. You won't see me very much." Time passes on, and your desire appears again:
"I'm a rough guy. Just take a second to think about what you're asking for, alright?"
More time, and more desperation on his part with your persistence:
"I am meant to die alone," he finally tells you outright. "Don't bother with me. You could be spending your time so much better than fussing over someone who isn't going to last."
But you do, and he does last. Unfortunately, he does last. It gnaws him to the bone.
"Alright," he'll ask you, a long time since you first expressed your wants, "Are you certain?" You say yes, of course you say yes. Bittersweet, sharp teeth smile. "Very well," the swordsman concedes.
You marry traditionally, though very small. A hood drapes over him, hiding his face as the priest speaks the seal of marriage. His hand clings to yours, so very afraid of losing you. Or worse: making you lose him.
With the formalities out of the way, his own way begins. Finally alone, you both plunge into deep water, a loud splash quickly muting to flooded ears. He holds your face as your hair drifts past him in strands noses nearly touching. Kisame gets a good look at you before he changes everything forever, closing his eyes.
Kisame's kiss is a leap of faith. It tastes like lake water and seaweed and his love. He presses all of you into him like a shell holds a pearl, limbs climbing around you as you suspend in water and sink. Breathe into him, breathe deep. Every last breath in his lungs is just for you.
A wedding song for you: Against the Kitchen Floor by Will Wood or If I'm Being Honest by dodie
Itachi:
The implications of this circumstance are astounding. He loves you- yes, of course he does- but what's more is that he loves you enough to be so selfish as to gift himself to you, even knowing the fate he's reserved. It is both impressive and heartbreaking. Have hope, you ask of him. That is all you ask of him. Give it a chance. It is what he wants, isn't it?
Of course it is. But are you okay if the inevitable comes true?
You pause, and he studies your naive, innocent eyes. But you know more than perhaps Itachi has realized. You know it is okay to treasure. It is okay to enjoy. The journey matters more than the destination. Yes, it is okay, you tell him, you love to love him all the same.
Dark eyes close. Then he will give you what is desired.
Kisame is present, of course, as well as the ancestors of the Uchiha clan in spirit. You are radiant, and he tells you so. You return the compliment in soft earnest. A single hand cups your cheek as he approaches, pausing to feel and taste your breath as it drifts into his mouth.
Itachi's kiss is barely there, like he's afraid of breaking glass. If you want to kiss deeper, you'll need to go in and get it yourself. Just don't mistake delicacy for a lack of interest. This is the most of his body he has ever given in his entire life. Just give him time.
A wedding song for you: Herbal Tea by Velvet Moon or Here For You by Good Co
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payasita · 1 year ago
Note
Good job getting ADHD medication! I’m so proud of you :D
thanks so so much im very happy and so hopeful for the first time maybe ever but also it TOOK ME LIKE. A YEAR. A YEAR.
like yall for real?? for real. for real i have been diagnosed since i was like six. (funny story my teacher thought i was on the spectrum so my parents get me tested with the nodes and shit and according to mom, who loves this story, my neurologist did all that and talked to me and then just turned to my mom and went "she's not autistic. she just hates the other kids" but they DID find an adhd diagnosis in there so net win for all of us)
diagnosed since i was SIX. on stimulants until i turned 8, and you know why i got off em? my pediatrician retired. we could not find another who would take our low-income insurance. so i just had to rawdog The Rest Of My Fucking Life. diagnosed when i was six. legally neurodivergent for 20 slutty slutty angry years.
and it still took me like. a few months to get a psych appointment. a few weeks to reaffirm my diagnosis as an adult. a few more weeks for another appointment for meds. he doesnt Want to do meds first, because i must have been doing fine without them if its been two decades, right? i got a job and a car and everything. well gee fuckin shittickers Dr. Brain Guy, just WHAT was my alternative? would you prefer i be maladapted to the point of incapacitation; is that what it takes for someone to be considered? i cheated my way through school. every day after work i sit for an hour in my car because i dont have the executive function to stand up and walk the ten steps to my house. garbage just appears around me. i have three empty bags of hot chip and two cans of sprite on my desk as we speak, neither from today. at that point i hadnt had a debit card for six months because that would have required me to Drive To The Bank, a location that was new to me in this area, so i just did everything on credit. is this all normal? is this fine? am i GOOD, actually, Dr. WeirdBrain?
so we cordially agree that yes i should probably be medicated. i want to do a stimulant. he does not want to put me on a stimulant. "stimulants can mess with your heart," he says, "and you're young, you don't want heart problems." i say ok because i dont want to make him think im just looking for narcotics. even though i am. because they WORK. i agree to try some kind of antidepressant.
the antidepressant gives me tachycardia. i go to the emergency room after reading a heartbeat of, oh, 140 bpm, which is about like double what it normally is and juuuust below the You Are Having A Heart Attack threshold. i get to the ER and the doctor there is very obviously convinced i'm a local addict having some sort of episode. it is the most ironic experience i've had all year and i feel an abrupt and all consuming kinship with those birds in australia that will swoop you and peck at your face for seemingly no good reason.
so yeah, we narrow it down to the antidepressant. as it turns out, these particular meds are known to, semi-commonly, Mess With Your Heart. i have my next appointment with my psych and somehow refrain from pecking his eyes out. he puts me on a noreprinephrine inhibitor(iirc) that isnt actually FDA approved to treat ADHD specifically(i DEFINITELY rc) but it IS given to smokers to help them quit. i dont smoke. i may very well fucking start before this whole ordeal is at the point where someone listens to me
it obviously does a combined total of jack and shit, and the man waffles with this one because he has "had success" using it as treatment for other ADHD patients. he ups the dose. twice. three months on the smoker meds, which are also apparently notorious for destroying your appetite, but they didnt even do THAT. no change to the average amount of hot chip on my desk.
he wants to try quelbree after that. i finally tell him i'm tired of this shit and would like to have more than two hours of usable daylight to function before it all falls to uncontrollable youtube shorts binges and a daily experience i like to call The Weighted Nothings and i would very much like to PLEASE. TRY A STIMULANT.
he's been friendly enough with me over these past four or five or whatever months but at this he gets suddenly very very business-baseline. gives me the whole spiel about the north american shortage. gives me a spiel about how i absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, lose or sell this medication, because they will not refill it if i do. i am sitting here wondering if he he's telling the truth about having other ADHD patients at all like ever in his career, and also, am i nuts or should the "don't sell your prescription drugs" bit apply to EVERYTHING? i dont fuckin know man i just live here
he says he wants a urine test first. its scheduled for two weeks out. i take it.
"hey uh, your piss came back with cannabis in it" "well it'd be weirder if it didn't, we are in california and i am a kitchen manager" "you can't have weed if you want adderall" "fine i'll stop" "we'll schedule you another test in a month" "aight bet" it didnt go exactly like that but this is kind of what the vibe between us has devolved into by this point.
anyway i wait a month and get a good grade in piss. i get the meds prescribed. i go to fill out the prescription
all i really need to say to you are the words "prior authorization error" for most of you to get what happened next.
the psych isnt even aware. i wait another month for our next meeting, which was yesterday. i do not yell at him. he tells me to take it up with the pharmacy, and yell at them. i am going to yell at them.
so i go, and guess what, it actually went through a while ago! NO ONE TOLD ME OR DR. FEEL-BAD OVER HERE. but we can't fill it right now because its a controlled substance so come back in a few hours. hey it's ready where the hell are you? TAKE YOUR METH AND GET OUT
anyway i started it today, reorganized my pantry, and fixed the fire alarm in my hallway that's been chirping at me for a week. i no longer have to wear earplugs to bed.
and with my newfound executive function superpowers, i will be spraying my weed-free piss all over Reagan's grave.
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catboygretzky · 7 months ago
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Exyblr Dashboard Simulator based on what I personally see on sportsblr:
2/?
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📜 realexyblog
haiku because exy is back:
GOD, why are my teams
SO fucking bad at exy?
FUCK this FUCKING sport.
#and i watch sports for why? entertainment? no way
243 notes
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♛ queen-of-exy
I WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG! KEVIN DAY IS A QUEEN SHES LITERALLY A QUEEN ITS ON HER FACE
💃fox-me-up follow
queen on the court, pillow princess on the mattress amiright
♛ queen-of-exy
ive never felt more understood, I am kissing you w tongue
#marry me tumblr user fox me up
411 notes
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🌞 blonde-jeremy-knox
i'm just gonna say it. i know we're all thinking it. jeremy knox eats ass like it's his JOB.
👁 jean-mor-uhoh
babe literally no one was thinking that but i'm proud of you for speaking your truth
#we're friends but what cost. when all u talk about is jeremy knox eating ass.
31 notes
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🧚 goalie-stan
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#dan wilds #psu
205 notes
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🌄 softkevinday follow
He lived. He served cunt. He died. He was Resurrected. Served more cunt.
#kevin day
605 notes
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👸🏻 kevindazed follow
absolutely busted a fucking nut watching kevin day switch hands like that oh my god my nut was so forceful it created a new dimension.
🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
hey can i join you in that dimension
👸🏻 kevindazed follow
Sure, just bring some snacks or something
🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
hell yeah!!!!!!
#thanks youre the best do you like doritos?
197 notes
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😎 foxyknoxy
the best exy team in the nation is a LIBERAL ARTS COLLEGE how many of those students even go to the games when your school is full of artists and theater kids. your student section must be wACK
😎 foxyknoxy
*sorry, 2nd best exy team in the nation
#fuck you theater kids!!!!!!!! can't even appreciate a good sport !!!!! anyway go trojans
99 notes
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🙈 ittybittyminny follow
Andrew Minyard should get a little bite and chew. As a reward. Maybe a small gnaw. nomnomnom Maaaaaybe as a treat he can rip a throat out, but only if he's really really good
#only if he's REALLY GOOD and maybe tests negative for rabies but whatever you can't win em all
126 notes
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🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
favourite exy rarepair????
☀️ usctrojanny
ACTUALLY !!!!! was thinking about this earlier and while ive never seen anyone talk about it.......aaron minyard and neil josten would be 👀 kinda cute???
🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
omg wait why have I never thought about guys before!!!!!!!! noooo why did you say this, i can totally see it!!!!!! Neil would probably have to lean down to kiss aaron 🥺 do u think he has ever had to lean down to kiss someone 😭
☀️ usctrojanny
And obviously, u know me, im always here for a striker/backliner matchup
🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow
this is all i'm going to think about for the rest of my life now, thanks, fuck you
139 notes
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👅 nastyneiljosten
I want to put neil josten in a jar and shake the jar so violently he turns into sludge and then pour a drop of that sludge on to a petri dish so I can see what kind of bacteria he produces.
🦩 exyonmymind follow
what happens to the rest of the sludge?
👅 nastyneiljosten
*sluuuuuuurp* *swallowing sounds* *sluuuurp* *gargle gargle* *more swallowing sounds* yummy yummy in my tummy
487 notes
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🐋 sexyexy
headcannon that neil josten is so feral bc andrew bit him and gave him rabies so now he's a literal rabid dog
👢exyinaphonebooth follow
You can't make headcannons about real people don't be freaks
🐋 sexyexy
exy players aren't real they're my little dolls that I can put into any situations I want and you can't stop me
#thanks anyway did u know andrew minyard gave neil josten rabies
143 notes
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🧸 mreow-bearcats-mreow
ARE THOSE REFS FUCKING BLIND ????????!
#exy lb
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👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me
Kiss cams are only acceptable during sporting events if they zoom in on two players
🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow
ok but what if they're wearing a face mask
👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me
smash your cages together obviously, don't be a pussy #love wins
🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow
fair enough
890 notes
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🌸 softexy
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Andrew and Aaron Minyard
#exy #andrew minyard #aaron minyard #palmetto foxes #psu #web weave #poetry
2,040 notes
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kanmom51 · 7 months ago
Text
JK's birthday 2019
Let's talk about JK's birthday in 2019.
I know it's a long time ago, but I got to thinking about it again and it just filled me with joy. And who am I to deprive you guys of some delusional joy as well? Right?
So, I think I am actually going to start from the end on this one.
JM flying half way across the world, from Paris...
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to be with JK on his birthday only to have to fly out the next morning to Hawaii with Sungwoon.
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And he does this all by surprising JK, who was not expecting him to be there with him, as he knew JM was in Paris, sly JM even sending him a kind of generic happy birthday message from Paris. You know, making sure JK KNOWS that he is still there on the streets of Paris all while JM was already on his way to be with him.
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JM loved to tell us all about it in his Riad live (you know, the one he also told us how happy he was with the surprise birthday celebration JK arranged for him during their concert there, oh and the same one we got him eying his "manager").
There is a link to the live itself in my post as well.
And here you will find screenshots of JM telling the story:
He was so damn proud of himself.
And rightfully so.
He made JK's day.
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Brought him this very special gift too:
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Yeah, let's hear how this wasn't planned why don't we?
Anyways...
Moving on.
Or perhaps moving back would be the proper way of putting it.
All of this happened on JK's birthday itself at night time (JM tells us he arrived back in SK 8-9 pm). But see, JK started off his birthday for us.
Wait. Was it for us? Or more so, was it only for us? Or was it perhaps also meant for that one person that wasn't there on that day. The one person that was in Paris, and whom JK believed was not going to be spending his birthday with him. The one person that flew half way across the world to surprise JK, and he sure did.
I know at this point I could be considered to be reaching a little bit, but hear me out here. Yes, JK was sending Army a message (well a few of them as you will see), but I do think that within those messages (this is something that those two are so good at), he was also sending another message, and it wasn't just for us. Although you could argue that in a sense it was also for us (letting us know who was on his mind at that point in time).
So here we go.
JK posts on Weverse on the eve of his birthday. This is just after midnight, specifically at 00:22 or 12:22 am KST.
This one is clearly for Army (not the one who declares himself to be Army).
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Following that, JK moves on to Twitter, where he tweets twice exactly 40 minutes later. 2 tweets, one minute apart from each other.
First tweet at 1:03 am SKT:
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Let's look at the numbers first before we move on to bigger and better things.
1:03 am 1.9
Just looking at those numbers we can get:
13-10 (1+9)
If we look at the date as 1.9.19 then we have the 13-10 and 1-9 as well. Go figure.
On purpose?
Who knows... maybe if we look into it a little further we will have more facts that can show us either way.
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The caption on JK's first tweet.
Could definitley be meant, once again, for us. Even though he already thanks us for making him happy. But what if this time it wasn't meant specifically for us. I mean, he already thanked us in a long message only 40 minutes earlier. What if the earlier one was for us, and this one here, with the timing of the posting, was meant for a special someone else, who happened to be far away from him.
Perhaps his choice to split his posts, his thanks, was because they were meant for 2 different recipients? Perhaps, this was just like him splitting up his White day live in 2023 into 4 segments. Each one of those segments with a clear purpose and you could also say a specific audience (at least for one of those 4 the intended audience was not us).
Yeah, I know, call me deluded. Call me crazy and call me whatever, but you know, I really don't think it's that far fetched.
And even more so when within a minute he tweets again. This time he uploads his gift - a snippet of his song Decalcomania.
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Captioned: "This... Please look forward to it".
{Side note, we still are even though we will never get the full song seeing that he had deleted it.}
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Are you seeing what I'm seeing here?
Like seriously, how can we miss this? And nope, you can't make up this shit either.
Time stamp on clip:
1: 18 min.
The song is clearly cut off at that time stamp.
This is not a coincidence. Seriously, enough is enough with that excuse. The recurring use of these numbers. 118, Nov 8, again and again and again. Before and after.
This is a clear message JK is sending again
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and again
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and again
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and again
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And lest forget a couple of his latest 8:11's
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and
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And here we have JK, on his birthday, following his tweet only one minute earlier thanking "you" for making him happy. Who he means by "you", well that I'm sure many will assume is his fans. At this point, seeing what came before and definitely what came after, I am easily convinced that it wasn't necessarily that "you", but the "you" that was about to surprise the shit out of him later that day.
So yeah, I'm finding it hard to conclude this is all a coincidence, seeing JM himself told us it's not...
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As for Decalcomania. Well, that one requires a post all of it's own.
One more thing before I go.
JK's 2019 birthday was a big one. It happened when the band were on break. When JM was using this time to travel with friends (not that they didn't spend time together, JK basically tells us that in BV4). A time with a couple of yucky dating rumors. A time of self reflection. This was a break where JK had his hand tattoos done, and surprisingly (NOT) added that very 'inconspicuous' J just above the M after his birthday.
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So yeah, this here my friends, is a hill, or even more so a mountain, that I am climbing up and are pretty confidently willing to die on...
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markrosewater · 1 month ago
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There’s an old article I’m hoping to read. Do you know if there’s any way to access ‘Metadwarfosis’ by Matt Cavota?
Metadwarfosis
Posted in Feature on November 23, 2005
By Matt Cavotta
Matt has worn many wizard hats in the 18 years he has worked on Magic—art-mage, logomancer, lightning bard, and (of course) Planeswalker.
### The Metadwarfosis
Ale-sodden Sing-alongs. There should be no explanation necessary here. One thing that is not cool is the cheesy stereotypical drunken dwarf crooning in a crude Irish-esque accent. If we “axe” this, we are swiftly on the road to cooler dwarves.
All Axes, All the Time. What's the deal with dwarves and axes? Why would a race that lives under rock ever develop an affinity for a tree-cutting weapon? Why would a weapon that must be swung wide to be effective be favored by a race that dwells in the tight confines of hewn tunnels? Why, scrapping all actual logic, would a race of any kind always reach for the same sort of weapon no matter what foe they engage? It's called shortsighted Gimli-filching. Sure, he likes his axe, but do ALL dwarves have to copy him. Rumpor Bristlebeard uses a short spear (gasp!), because he can easily skewer foes invading his home tunnel. Our dwarves are cooler already.
These Dwarves are Made for Diggin'. Why would a race that burrows underground have little natural tools for doing so. Other than the fact that they're short, dwarves have no adaptations to their own environment. OK, they can see in the dark too, but their squinty little eyes don't look anything like the eyes of an underground dweller. Our new dwarves will have larger, more light-absorbing eyeballs. Also, why don't dwarves have any natural digging capability? They're basically just short, fat humans. Let's give them slightly longer arms for reaching, and big strong hands with thick sharp fingernails for digging (in case a pick or shovel is not handy.)
Up the Obsession! Let's amp up the red in these folks. Bump up their love of precious metals to all-out obsession. They could be like little twisted underdweller crows, each out to one-up the other with a bigger pile o' loot.
To Beard or Not to Beard. That is the question. I say “not to beard.” A race that defines itself and bases its pride upon its facial hair seems really trite and thin. “Don't mess with the beard!” “Are you insulting my beard?!” “All great heroes have beards!” “Beards, beards, beards!” That sounds really lame to me. It's especially lame because other races have beards too. Let's make it so our dwarves are proud of their reckless abandon in battle and of the number of foes they have pinned to the end of their [insert sword, spear, dagger, or any other weapon that is not an axe.] Oh, and of their pile o' loot too!
Cry Anarchy! Our dwarves will also be more essentially red. They will not help each other out all the time and “stick together through thick and thin.” Leave that stuff for sappy humans. Our guys are bloodthirsty little warmongers. They are a twisted by their fiery obsession, each out to spill more blood than the next guy. Now we're seeing red!
These Dwarves are Made for Diggin' v.2. I am also confused about why dwarves are so thick and heavy. It's probably just to make them the obvious opposite of thin and graceful elves. Rubbish. They live in tunnels, they should be adapted to that life. Instead of being so broad, our dwarves will be a little more wiry. Strong and hearty, but wiry. This makes it easier for them to navigate the budding mine shafts and tunnels that they burrow out. In addition to actually being short, they naturally walk with a bit of a hunch- nobody likes to hit his head all the time. These dwarves are already more believable. This is
By Clangeddin, we've created a goblin! Could this be why all the small red ground creatures of recent memory are goblins? I doubt it, but it is good for a little chuckle and a brief moment of contemplation on how dwarves and goblins represent what is red about red weenie creatures.
If I had my way, we probably would see dwarves in Magic, but they'd mostly be white, and there would be time and attention paid to reframing them as a race of sometimes bald-faced folk who sometimes might not live underground and often use weapons other than axes and who speak their own nothing-like-irish language. They would be a proud people, spiritual and devoted, wise and ancient. My dwarves would have cool cultural characteristics other than their stature, hairyness, and level of inebriation.
[The survey originally included in this article has been removed.]
Until that happens I, for one, am not all that sad that old-school dwarves have been off the scene for a while. I'd rather have them in the deep of their mines, combing their beards and sharpening their axes- waiting, waiting to see the light and emerge as something less slave to the ways of old folklore and new Hollywood mythology. I will happily wait for a true Magic dwarf.
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ohmyeyesmyeyes · 1 year ago
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what happened in switzerland?
mick schumacher x singer!f!reader
fc: gracie abrams bc i have no self control
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britishvogue posted...
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liked by ynofficial, alexachung and 231,926 others
britishvogue: Singer y/n l/n recently attended a music festival in Australia after her break from social media and the public eye. In an interview conducted by a fan, she explained how she was excited to see what the future has in store and is looking forward to releasing new music after an inspiring trip to Switzerland this Winter.
view all comments
fan1: FINALLY MOTHER HAS RETURNED
fan2: get this woman a grammy immediately
fan3: pls she's so cute 😭
fan4: at this point i genuinely think i'm in love with her
fan5: this is amazing and all but i'm wondering why switzerland?
fan6: switzerland is actually very beautiful so it makes sense that she was inspired when she visited
fan7: fr like switzerland in the winter???? cold but GORGEOUS
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liked by alyahcs, alexachung and 791,193 others
ynofficial: i feel like it'd be weird to ignore the fact that i kind of went offline for about a year and a half (and i only just found out that virtually nobody had seen me either) so i'm letting you guys know that i'm alive, well, happy, and writing again - and i'm so excited to announce that a new single, 'happy endings', will be released at midnight tonight!
also, have some (2) pictures from the last 18 months, photographed in my new happy place 🥰
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fan8: YOU LOOK SO HAPPY IM SO EXCITED
fan9: happy endings will either destroy my mental health or leave me a sobbing mess on the bathroom floor (wrong, it'll do both)
fan10: switzerland is officially on my bucket list of countries to visit
ynofficial: good girl👍👍👍👍
fan10: imdead 🧎🧎
fan11: i'm 🫶 so 🫶 proud 🫶 of 🫶 you 🫶
ynofficial: STOP YOU'RE MAKING ME BLUSH
georgerussell63: looking forward to hearing it!
liked by ynofficial
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mickschumacher has posted to their story...
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liked by mclaren, lissiemackintosh and 360,184 others
mercedesamgf1: it's official: the boys are all in their 'happy endings' eras! 🥳
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fan12: came for the driving update, left knowing we can stan the merc boys
fan13: AS THEY BLOODY WELL SHOULD BE
fan14: idk bout you but mick is cheesing a little too hard at that question 😏
fan15: i thought that too, but he probably just has a little crush, bless his soul 🥰
fan16: i wasn't convinced but after i saw lewis likes her music, i listened to her recent single and omg it's actually incredible
fan17: is this the same y/n that mick posted about the other day?
fan18: yes!
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liked by ynofficial, phildunster and 483,188 others
mercedesamgf1: familiar faces in the garage. fabioquatararo, tomholland2013 and ynofficial are attending the race on behalf of us (by popular demand 😉)
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fan19: i hope the drivers begged them to invite ynofficial 😞
mercedesamgf1: who says they didn't? 🤔
fan20: I BET IT WAS MICK
fan21: GIVE ME A TOM AND Y/N INTERACTION I'M BEGGING YOU
fan22: tom??? fabio is a literal motogp wc 😭
fan23: scraping for crumbs of y/n rn GIVE US EVERYTHING YOU HAVE
mercedesamgf1: 🫡
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liked by estebanocon, connor_swindells and 519,312 others
ynofficial: thank you mercedesamgf1, this weekend has been INSANE!!! also, a massive shout out to mickschumacher for being the best tour guide 😁
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fan24: ok panic over *mops up forehead* 😌
fan25: aw i was kinda hoping they were dating, they'd be cute together 🥲
fan26: this^
fan27: the way they both looked like they were having fun 😊
fan28: PLS HIS FACE IT'S TOO CUTE AHHSDJF
fan29: omg she did a hot lap BABE WHO WAS THE DRIVER
ynofficial: mickshumacher!
fan30: oh. my. god.
mercedesamgf1: content coming soon 😉
fan31: i'm dying someone send helllllpppppp
fan32: why am i fighting the urge to squeal after that merc comment
fan33: no bc same that emoji defo implies something
mickshumacher: had an awesome time with you this weekend ☺️
liked by ynofficial
fan34: shooting his shot
fan35: yk what, i'd probably do the same
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liked by landonorris, stephbohrer and 591,374 others
mickschumacher: austria 😁
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fan36: hmm yeah they're probably dating let's be honest
fan37: but he was only her tour guide and it's kind of natural that he'd get photos of her, esp considering she was invited as a merc guest?
fan38: true but when has mick ever done that before?
fan37: i'm just saying, the last thing we want to do is assume things bc there's a perfectly reasonable excuse as to why they've been spending time together
fan39: FUCKING BROAD SHOULDERS 🫠🫠
fan40: i just know y/n took that 😭
fan41: kay but all those photos are just so cute
fan42: right???
callum_ilott: 🤨
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liked by danielricciardo, kaitlyndever and 691,320 others
ynofficial: my new album 'STAYING AT SEB'S' is out next week and i'm so excited for you all to finally hear it!
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fan43: seb's? as in seb vettel's farm?
fan44: just how did you draw that conclusion????
fan43: bc she could be dating mick and seb owns a farm in switzerland and i'm pretty sure she knows daniel ricciardo through her manager who knows seb vettel. it's far-fetched but it's not impossible
fan45: if this is right...🤯
fan46: OMG I'M SO EXCITED I JUST SHIT MYSELF IN COSTCO
fan47: i'm gonna listen to this because i'm a massive fan of baby goats
ynofficial: omg i love that for you
fan48: is it a happy album or soul-crushingly depressing
ynofficial: 🤷
fan49: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN GIRLIE 💀
charles_leclerc: no bc i'm so excited
fan50: charles lmao
ynofficial: 🫶
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liked by ynofficial, sebastianvettel and 691,186 others
mickshumacher: happy two years, sweetheart 💗 there's never been a day i haven't been in complete awe of your existence; i love and appreciate you everyday
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fan51: oh. em. acca. gee.
fan52: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
fan53: I SHIP IT. I SHIP IT SO HARD
fan54: babe calm down, they've sailed already
fan55: i'm crying pls the way she looks at him HAS ME BLUSHING
georgerussell63: congrats to the happy couple!
estebanocon: about time our dts gossip session came to light 🤣
danielricciardo: fucking finally 😁
lewishamilton: 💜
fan56: the support from the drivers is melting meeeee
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liked by mercedesamgf1, laurawoodsy and 712,001 others
ynofficial: happy 2 years to my favourite person, the love of my life, the most adorable human being ever created, and my best friend. it's been a blast so far and i'm loving every second of it 🥰
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fan57: can i ask if mick is the inspiration for 'happy endings'?
ynofficial: he's actually the inspiration for the whole album
fan58: he's so golden retriever
sebastianvettel: i can confirm this is true
danielricciardo: hello??? seb??? look at my texts
fan59: ok he's hot
fan60: THE MOTORBIKE AND THE ARMS 😭🥵
fan61: she's out here creating thirst traps of her bf
fan62: honestly if he looked like mick, i think i would too
fan63: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY 'STAYING AT SEB'S'??????
ynofficial: SEB VETTEL
charles_leclerc: 😲
estebanocon: 😲
lewishamilton: 😲
danielricciardo: 😲
landonorris: 😲
ynofficial: kay wtf
490 notes · View notes
rekino2114 · 5 months ago
Note
can I ask sdra2 with reader that got cheated/ or almost died by their ex
Sdra2 girls with a reader that was abused by their ex
A/n:I kinda decided to go with a mix of the two ideas you gave me
Sora
(Credit to @omori-kunster for this amazing sora banner my weird brain got bothered that she doesn't have an introduction like everyone else so I decided to use this, please let me know if you're ok with me using it)
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Sora probably picked up on some habits of yours that suggested you had a troubled past with relationship, and wanting you to trust her completely asked you about it.
She was flabbergasted when you told her that your ex abused you, why would they do that to such a kind and sweet person?
If she meets your ex she will just glare at incredibly hard while mentally spouting out all of the possible insults she can think of.
"Don't worry y/n, I won't treat you like that. I love only you, and nothing will make me stop"
Kokoro mitsume
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She already knew about it very early in your relationship, but she didn't want to confront you about it because she wanted you to be the one to bring it up whenever you felt ready.
She's probably one of the best people you could tell. She's a psychologist, so she probably knows how to handle similar situations. She'll make sure to show you her love more directly after that conversation to show you that she's not like your ex.
She asks you to ignore your ex if you ever meet them again. They don't deserve your time, plus engaging in conversations with them might trigger you.
"I'm very proud of you for telling me this y/n. You are very brave to open up, and I'm glad you trust me enough to do so"
Emma magorobi
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Even with her acting skills, she couldn't hide how heartbroken, surprised, and pissed off she was at hearing your story, she just couldn't believe someone could do this to you.
She decided to share a bit of her traumatic past with you too, if you trusted her that much, then she should do the same.
This is one of the few times she thinks about using her influence for something like this. She'll accuse your ex of everything you told her they did on social media, hoping to get them arrested.
"I am so sorry for what happened, my love, but on the bright side, now we know we can trust each other even more"
Setsuka chiebukuro
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She probably noticed when you flinched while she was hugging you, she loves being physically affectionate but she wants you to be comfortably with it first, she will sit you down and try to ask you what was wrong.
She was just so shocked that something like that happened to you, she knows people like that exist but she didn't expect you to be a victim of that. She will remind you of her love daily and will make sure to show you that she is much much better than your ex.
She might try to find out who your ex is if you don't feel like telling her, if to just satisfy her curiosity. But if you ever meet them again she will turn your head the other direction while hugging you and shooting them a death glare.
"Don't worry now. Big sis has got you, no one will hurt you again while she's with you. I love you more than you could ever imagine. Don't forget that, ok baby?"
Hibiki otonokoji
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Hibiki doesn't have much experience with love so she probably didn't notice anything particularly weird about your behavior, she just thought you were shy and didn't like physical affection and it was fine with her.
When you told her that you were actually abused by your ex, she just started crying and hugging you. She blames herself for not noticing earlier, but from now on, she makes sure everyone treats you nicely, even by yelling at them if they do anything to trigger you.
She could not contain her rage if she saw your ex around. She would just scream and yell at them until she had no voice left in her, and thanks to her vocal training that's a lot of time. (She considered beating them up too but then realized she's too weak)
"I'm so sorry for not noticing earlier y/n but don't worry I will make sure no one treats you like that again you only deserve the best"
Kanade otonokoji
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Your ex is so dead. As soon as she learned you had an ex, she was already planning to kill them just to make sure they didn't bother your relationship, but when she learned they actually abused you,her plans got way way more brutal.
Of course she will make sure you feel loved and protected, she'll make everything she can to make you trust her, she'd never hurt you after all, but with the people who harm you it's another story.
You'll never see your ex again because conveniently, shortly after telling kanade about them, they disappeared mysteriously, while it was a surprise it definitely wasn't an unwelcome one.
"Darling, don't worry about your ex anymore, ok? I promise they'll never hurt you again as will no one else I'll make sure of that my love"
Iroha nijiue
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Iroha isn't the smartest so she'll probably mistake some of your gestures as shyness or simply inexperience like hibiki.
She cried too when she heard your experiences, she blamed herself even If she didn't do anything, you ended up being the one to comfort her but she makes sure to show you her love too especially by hugging you a lot.
She's way too shy and scared to do anything if she ever meets your ex so she will just ask you to go to another place.
"I-i'm sorry for what you've been through y/n *sniffle* I really am. B-but if it makes you feel better I love you and will never treat you like that"
Yoruko kabuya
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Yoruko is pretty observant, so even if not immediately, she noticed the signs but didn't wanna be too forward so she waited for you to be ready to tell her, dropping hints that she was fine with whatever happened in your past along the way.
While she expected it to be something like this, she was still surprised at the sheer amount of abuse you went trough, she will try to comfort you the best she can and will try to be a little less tsundere and show you her love more directly.
She really doesn't want you to meet your ex again to keep you safe so if she ever sees them she will guide you away and start berating them with insults and threats.
"I feel really sorry for you y/n but at least you have me now, you're safe with me...and loved"
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