#oh she’s about to go for the throat !!!
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Imagine your canon Warden, Hawke, Inquisitor and Rook and their respective LI on a quadruple date - how will it go?
#there was a post about it going around but I can't find it anymore 😭#so I made a new one because I want to see all your awful quadruple date headcanons#don't ask me what happened in 2014 I still don't know#anders really is the golden retriever to messed up murderer with glowing eyes pipeline#alistair x cousland#handers#solavellan#rookanis#alistair theirin#anders#solas#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age#dragon age origins#dragon age 2#dragon age inquisition#dragon age the veilguard#datv#I think there would be a wild discussion about demons and possession and mages and freedom#and amidst of it a poor puppy boy trying to get out#I feel like solas and anders would actually get along quite well though???#surprisingly#not sure how spite and justice would feel about each other this could go both ways#maybe anders and alistair would have to hold lucanis down at some point because he just straight up goes for solas' throat#my warden hawke inquisitor and rook would just excuse themselves and have a drink together because no way they're dealing with that mess#there would be some reservations because queen warden commander is intimidating af but she's nice and a badass sooo...#marian is smitten and lowkey trying to flirt her up#and rook would try to get to know lavellan really awkwardly because she's his idol#he would be overall very nervous because he gets flustered around powerful women and all three of them in one room#oh boy he's sweating
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hot take but even if you find a woman ‘mean’ or ‘bitchy’ or ‘inconsiderate for using flowers to promote a movie based on a character named after a flower who also owns a flower shop instead of talking about DV’ does not mean that she deserves to be sexually harassed.
#now i’m no blake lively stan or even know much about her#but what I do know is that this rhetoric feeds into the whole ‘oh so she was asking for it’#you guys will jump down women’s throat for the one time she gave a dirty look but when it comes to men it’s hear me out#reading her statement was fucking harrowing. no woman deserves to go through that#blake lively
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#danny phantom#art#my fanart#fanart#danny fenton#sam manson#tucker foley#i can't draw#oh well#tucker is about to turn sam into a ghost#she's about to do the same#danny wants them to stop#tucker: no sam. i'm not murdering animals#but i will if you don't stop forcing your bunny food down my throat.#danny: guys. murder is not ok. human or animal.#sam: oh i'll show you murder!#(insert rant about animal cruelty and stuff.)#idk#that's probably what's going on#or something
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You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)
#moe talks a lot#i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry#and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds#LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO#shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds#BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER#i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up#i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong#after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before#YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain#oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older#and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds#holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang#sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat#but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like#welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant#anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain#im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake#but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry#anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering
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Hi! Your solnep art is so cute! Ive never considered that ship before, but given nepetas type, i could totally see it working out. Keep up the good art 💚💛💚💛
y'all are making me emotional by the sweet comments 😭thank you guys so muchhhhh!!!
its fair that folks dont consider them really but i think with working them out a little more and actually having them interact more, theyd honestly be pretty good together in any quadrant. even if its just generally chill friends at first and overtime growing a bit closer (which is how i kind of always viewed that working out).
#art#digital art#homestuck#procreate#nepeta leijon#sollux captor#solnep#whenever you guys send me messages i cry little happy tears because its like#wow!!!! people like the little chaos ship!!!#i wholeheartedly believe their relationship works the absolute best in future settings and when older#unless you count like the little bloodswap au but thats a whole different setting and story#truth is these two would have been absolutely killer to see together and i think its a shame we dont actually really see them interact much#like yeah sollux knows shes the weird kitty girl but shes also a mauling machine and i think a reminder of that would be funny#just the eyebrow raise of like “oh yeah she has tea parties but she also ripped a bears throat out with her teeth”#and nep would be a little boost in his pessimism and when she hears him talk badly about himself#:33 < lux if i hear another murmurr about you thinking your work is trash im going curb stomp that frown into a smile
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Size chart for (some) Cyberverse characters!
(Note: The size and conversions into feet will be done below, typed out for convenience.)
So I was scrolling around on Seibertron's discussion threads about cyberverse (somebody was trying to bring some political figures in the conversation and I was so confused) to try and ignore my real-life responsibilities and I stumbled upon this post!
It's a (probably) official size chart for certain characters from cyberverse! I posted another version of the screenshot below. Also, here is the original video from where the size chart came from, and it is also in a playlist, including other videos about this cyberverse magazine.
Note: I suggest you click on the picture or open it in a new tab, as tumblr murdered the quality pretty badly. I also suggest you all to watch the video, because my computer is kinda crappy, and idk if taking a screenshot murdered the quality.
HEIGHT AND CONVERSION INTO IMPERIAL SYSTEM:
This is by the order from left to right, top to bottom. Please note that this isn't exact, as I'm just trying my best with eyeballing the heights, and I'm using google conversion to change this in the imperial system, and I'm also rounding the numbers to only two decimal places. Also, the poses they're doing are really weird (seriously, what are you doing, Acid Storm?), but I'm assuming that wherever their heads end is how tall whoever put this chart together wanted them to be, and they didn't have access to any official art that had everyone standing straight.
By the way, please don't chew me a new butt if I'm off by around 0.10 meters or something. I'm trying my best here, and I don't really want to break out the rulers and grid and do math to find their exact height. I'm just doing this for fun :]
AUTOBOTS/TOP ROW: Bumblebee: 4.75 meters, equivalent to 15.58 feet. Optimus Prime: 5.75 meters, equivalent to 18.86 feet. Windblade: 4.75 meters, equivalent to 15.58 feet. Grimlock: 6 meters, equivalent to 19.69 feet (nice). Hot Rod: 5.25 meters, equivalent to 17.22 feet. Wheeljack: 5.50 meters, equivalent to 18.04 feet. Blurr: 5.50 meters, equivalent to 18.04 feet. Ratchet: 5.65 meters, equivalent to 18.54 feet.
DECEPTICONS/BOTTOM ROW: Megatron: 6.25 meters, equivalent to 20.50 feet. Starscream: 5.10 meters, equivalent to 16.73 feet. Shockwave: 5.75 meters, equivalent to 18.86 feet. Thundercracker: 4.65 meters, equivalent to 15.26 feet. Shadow Striker: 5.65 meters, equivalent to 18.54 feet. Acid Storm: 4.65 meters, equivalent to 15.26 feet. Soundwave: 5.65 meters, equivalent to 18.54 feet. Slipstream: 4.65 meters, equivalent to 15.26 feet.
Below the cut is some stuff that I found interesting, like the average of heights, orders from shortest to tallest, surprises I had, and other thoughts. Take a look!
AVERAGE HEIGHTS OF AUTOBOTS: 5.39 meters, equivalent to 17.69 feet (nice).
AVERAGE HEIGHTS OF DECEPTICONS: 5.29 meters, equivalent to 17.37 feet.
AVERAGE HEIGHTS OF BOTS WITH LAND-BASED ALT-MODES (there were 11 of them in total; 7 Autobots, 4 Decepticons): 5.61 meters, equivalent to 18.40 feet.
AVERAGE HEIGHTS OF BOTS WITH AERIAL-BASED ALT-MODES (there were 5 of them in total; 1 Autobot, 4 Decepticons): 4.76 meters, equivalent to 15.62 feet.
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Height re-order; Tallest to shortest, all bots: 1. Megatron (6.25 m // 20.50 ft) 2. Grimlock (6 m // 19.69 ft) 3. Optimus Prime and Shockwave (Both 5.75 m // 18.86 ft) 4. Ratchet, Shadow Striker, and Soundwave (All 5.65 m // 18.54 ft) 5. Blurr and Wheeljack (Both 5.50 m // 18.04 ft) 6. Hot Rod (5.25 m // 17.22 ft) 7. Starscream (5.10 m // 16.73 ft) 8. Bumblebee and Windblade (Both 4.75 m // 15.58 ft) 9. Acid Storm, Slipstream, and Thundercracker (All 4.65 m // 15.26 ft)
Height re-order; Tallest to shortest, Autobots only: 1. Grimlock (6 m // 19.69 ft) 2. Optimus Prime (5.75 m // 18.54 ft) 3. Ratchet (5.65 m // 18.54 ft) 4. Blurr and Wheeljack (Both 5.50 m // 18.04 ft) 5. Hot Rod (5.25 m // 17.22 ft) 6. Bumblebee and Windblade (Both 4.75 m // 15.58 ft)
Height re-order; Tallest to shortest, Decepticons only: 1. Megatron (6.25 m // 20.50 ft) 2. Shockwave (5.75 m // 18.86 ft) 3. Shadow Striker, and Soundwave (Both 5.65 m // 18.54 ft) 4. Starscream (5.10 m // 16.73 ft) 5. Acid Storm, Slipstream, and Thundercracker (All 4.65 m // 15.26 ft)
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This whole list was pretty interesting, although I do feel like the animators weren't all that faithful to this (heck, I don't think they had this, and were just told general guidelines to follow to make each character a certain height.) Also, I'd have thought the seekers (and Windblade) would have been taller than most of the other bots that have land-based alt-modes, like Bumblebee or Hot Rod. I guess not in this continuity.
Considering that the other bots that are the same height as Shadow Striker or taller are either SUVs, tanks, large trucks, dinosaurs, etc, while Shadow Striker is just a sports car is pretty interesting.
I also like to imagine that the only reason why Starscream is taller than the other seekers listed is because he made some sort of mod (maybe something that has to do to his rockets at his heel/foot?)
It's too bad that there doesn't seem to be anything with the rest of the s1 characters (Because I swear there were more Autobots first shown in background scenes during season one, but I could be wrong), and it really is too bad that we don't have anything for the season 2, 3, and the movie specials.
Still, I hope you all found this post as interesting as I did!
#tf cyberverse#transformers cyberverse#cyberverse#tfc#It's a bird! It's a plane! It's... an original post!#<- this is going to be my new tag for any original posts I make. This is named cyberverse reblogger after all not cyberverse original posts#also if anyone could identify the language please let me know! I'm curious as to what country published these.#I don't think there's anything on these magazines in tfwiki as well#which is pretty interesting.#I forgot where but someone did an interview with mae catt and-#-I think it was said somewhere that shadow striker was as tall/taller than optimus and I think that's pretty neat because that's-#-pretty close to the actual truth. She's about 10m shorter which isn't by a lot.#ngl i'm not the biggest fan of that website i got the comparison chart off. A lot of the users sounded grumpy and i feel like i'm-#-eavesdropping on a bunch of grandpas and 50-something year-olds huddled around a table of a local coffee shop that is sort of run down.#The type of place that smells like pee near the entrance door but the inside isn't that bad if you can ignore the heavy scent of smoke.#oh boy... here we go with the tags. Clears throat:#bumblebee#optimus prime#windblade#grimlock#hot rod#wheeljack#blurr#ratchet#megatron#starscream#shockwave#thundercracker#shadow striker#acid storm
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Idk if I'm gonna be able to articulate this on the fly like first thing in the morning, but. I think my ENTIRE body of work is This: Examining how family ties, bonds or lack thereof, the good and bad AND ugly, seep into every facet of who we are and how we come to interact with others. How sometimes, a family tie (or again, a Lack of one), will sometimes bleed into how you act and treat specific people. Will bleed into how you CONNECT with those people (or, will be the very reason you fail to do so).
HOWEVER. HOWEVER. THERE IS A DELICATE LINE. A BALANCING ACT. You CANNOT just simply attribute fanon flavored ideas of found family to such characters. That's too simple, and sometimes, is a complete disservice to the specific character you're working with. I am once again bringing up Chilchuck. YES, him being a dad Absolutely seeps into how he treats his party. But if you call him the party's dad, you're Insane. Do you know ANYTHING ABOUT THAT MAN???? He would prefer you didn't. But I digress. He strikes a fascinating balance, between having The Qualities and ESPECIALLY expressing his care for his party in a Really Specific divorced (separated.) father of three fashion, but that does Not make him a "dad friend". He's a professional. He's on business. He's going home at the end of the day, and at the end of this adventure he's thinking of setting up a shop. I wanted to keep this more vague and broad but like. The Chilchuck example REALLY DOES perfectly articulate What I'm trying to get at, here. He's the perfect encapsulation of How his family shapes him, how that bleeds into his relationships with others, vs Who he is as a person.
How we were raised, our family ties, whether you adhere to it or you've fallen FAR from the tree -- you still fell from that stupid fucking tree. It's in your blood. Literally. It gave you shape, whether you liked it or not. And sometimes some things just set off weird domino effects, that also affect us irrevocably forever.
WHICH IS. TO SAY. I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about. I'm always trying to figure that out. Found family is/can be real, you're not strictly bound by blood if you don't wanna be. BUT. The bullshit I'm constantly on, is trying to figure out how to balance all that without slotting everyone into reductive roles. I'm gay and I seek to destroy the nuclear family. Not attempt to recreate nuclear family 2.0. You CAN reconstruct What Family Is/Means from the ground up, but you have to accept that things are going to get Weird. Because you're Queer. You are fundamentally incompatible with the status quo and normalcy, the solution is NOT assimilation and palatability, the solution is to just. Get weirder. And be fluent in canon. Okay. I love you
#my notes#why am i becoming chilchuck's spokesperson. chilchuck defender.#well i can fucking tell you! it's because my dad is a divorced father of FIVE. with a drinking problem so bad#that if he didn't quit it would have killed him. and guess what! i can tell you a few things about alfonse.#the way alfonse strives to be just like gustav. idealizing him ect ect. and the way i just wanna grab him by the shoulders#and SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. snap him out of repeating the cycles by the power of friendship and gay sex#it SUCKS ASS TO SAY IT IN THE SAME BREATH. I HATE THIS AS MUCH AS YOU DO.#but if you (my own brother) are gonna end up Just Like Your Father could you at least go all the way. get divorced. for the love of god#get divorced. oh my god okay oversharing hour but the WAY. THE WAY. dad once told me#[my brother's now ex wife far as i know thank god it finally happened bu my god it took WAY too long]#but the way my dad told me once [my brother's ex wife] reminded him a bit of his second wife.#oh my god i didn't even tell you the famous dad lore. he's been divorced three times. he is THE EPIC DIVORCE MAN.#like when i look at chilchuck i go. i know this man personally. i live with him.#alfonse's case is. really. really way more complicated. like what i just said#truly is only the tip of the iceberg WHILE ALSO. SIMULTANEOUSLY. only being One Single Facet. to what he is to me.#BUT ALSO. CONSIDER. the Parallels i'm setting up between alfonse w gustav VS. moe and its mother.#okay i will not say more bc i'll talk forever. final piece i really want to throw out there is though#do you think anna's situation w her family business being The Basis of how she connects w others#do you think the WAY she and all the other annas were Raised is like. comparable to religion actually?#and ESP like. i don't know if there's any hard and fast rules or anything but she and all her sisters ARE.#PRESUMABLY. RAISED A V SPECIFIC WAY. to be highly competitive cut-throat merchants.#what does this mean for COMMANDER anna. one of (if not ONLY?) instance of an anna who fell outside of that.#also is it agab dependant? could you be amab and then later on become an anna if that's what#oh my god i'm thinking of that ratatouille post. accepting of your gender identity but NOT of your Life Choice to be a chef.#is it. exactly like that. and if you're afab and end up being trans do you just fall to the wayside?#like the point is NOT to inject transphobia in here. the point is to ask Okay HOW THE HELL DOES ANY OF THIS WORK???????#bc the Implications go INSANE. and also the point is to ask what is the funniest answer possible to any of the questions#I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN. AND BE INSANE.#like final clarification i only say religion bc that's what i'm familiar with (specifically christainity)#but maybe it's more apt -- a different flavor of traditional family culture that has strict gender roles.
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woke up early, sick and feverish, and immediately thought of malstarion
i wonder what that means for me.. hmmm
#life#the bg3 adventures#my throat hurts so bad i feel like absolute shit#but i guess the 🧠🪱 from last night are still strong#like imagine that conversation unfolding..#imagine astarion realizing that those few times they fucked before mal didn’t come??#i'm kinda annoyingly into him going from “oh she's a virgin this should be ez gg”#to scrambling and panicking because he doesn't know how to approach her pleasure#(she doesnt know either because of her inexperience and constant overthinking and being self-conscious about it)#BUT it puts them on a bit of a journey especially after defeating the elder brain#exploring what they both like.. trying new things#astarion learning to be patient about it.. taking time to learn what she actually likes#and lbh he'd probably see it as a bit of an exciting challenge#and i feel like once mal gets more comfortable and confident she'd also want to learn#what makes him tick.. what he likes.. what feels good#and it's all exciting!!#ah.. their early years!! when they're both young and fresh and happy!!#don't tell them about the tragedies they'd inflict on one another...
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Wolf Hall re-watch rambles - oh i'm realizing the exact moment thomas started hating both Mary and George boleyn.
#i'd say he understands that the two of them are just using them#but there's the scene at the wedding or whatever idk which it is#where george threatens him and then it's also the night after mary basically played him#and when she makes that motion toward him and smiles#he gets visiby angry and physically lashes out at George#at this point it's clear in the show he is tired of being used by them#and he is just now realizing how cut throat and snake like the boleyn's are#at a point#he was willing to give mary the benefit of the doubt#but there is this idea that the boleny's think they can tame him#that they believe no matter what - they can control him#and also - it's heavily implied that mary told George about her little thing going on with thomas#and that is why george threatened him#and then for her to smile at them without realizing what was going on#oh yeah he hates both of them#we already know he feels poorly of anne
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I cannot fathom the level of self importance some people must have to behave this way
#it’s more so selfishness lmao#idk I’m getting unnecessarily worked up about this but 6 months ago I kinda vanished off of everywhere and then I noticed she deleted some#messages#girl I would’ve responded later calm down gosh the messages aren’t going anywhere nor are they disappearing#dora daily#I think of all people who should be mad you’re the last one because tell me why you were so viscerally rude to me since the beginning and#played a massive part of the roaa situation by being complacent when oh ! I thought you’d side with your alleged best friend ME#girl you have no right to complain at all not to mention you take FOREVER when you have no excuse to reply back but when I’m struggling I#apparently have zero excuse ☠️ girl bye#not to mention the fact that when I was so frustrated with myself having these bad headaches and being so incapable of doing anything when#exams were so close all you had to say was what can I do#well bitch what could I have done when you were at hospital#I guarantee you I was the only one texting you 24:7 asking how you were#reassuring you that it’s okay to feel upset about being in the fucking hospital and you don’t need to have such toxic positivity all the tim#oh but when the other girl had freaking back pain from her period or something apparently that’s more of a concern#girl bye#not me who has chronic headaches and cannot even study and nothing sticking cause it’s that bad#oh but go ahead compare it to your chronic illnesss like yes it’s horrible and yes it impacts you a lot#but I don’t think it impacts your brain and memorisation capacity#not to mention how fucking jealous she is of everything like I can say oh god I was so stressed and girl she has not felt stress in her life#compared to what I go through yet she is jealous of the fact I can stress ? tf?#and when I say I almost passed out cause of exhaustion she doesn’t give a shit when I was being so serious#in truth I’ve come to realise nobody does seem to care at all lmao they all think I’m lying#why would I lie about that be so fucking fr rn#anyways this is why I simply don’t want to talk about my physical condition with anyone anymore because they’ll think I’m a liar anyways 🤷♀#not to mention the fact if you even knew me a little you’d understand that it’s so impossibly hard for me to feel comfortable enough to#complain to talk about me feeling sick or sad or whatever I only do it here cause no one follows me and no one will rlly see it at all#but even here I feel like my throat closes up and I can barely breathe when I do complain#so pls …#this one sided friendship thing is crazy cause girl how do I shake you off?
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i’m going to die of toxic exposure to insane aunts. i’m so fucking serious there’s too many of them in this house
#there’s aunt 1 who’s incapable of communicating normally and turns every single small thing into a life or death situation and causes#unnecessary chaos. and also is insane about food -> restricts it so much for her daughter (who’s insane in other ways) for no reason#and THEN there’s my other aunt who’s a fucking supervillain from an 1800s show about an orphanage or something i swear to god. to the point#where my dad once said OUT LOUD in FRONT OF PEOPLE/GUESTS are [her kids’] throats sore or is [her] mind just going bad (makes more sense in#urdu. kharaab is the word he used for their throats and her mind x)#anyway she has no personality other than not letting her 5 year old kids go outside or run or anything ever and being a transphobic#misogynistic cunt. anyway#.txt#oh and i forgot about aunt 3 who’s not as bad but still extremely passive aggressively transphobic to me x
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hi update things are fucking terrible and my eyes hurt from sobbing. lol
#purrs#delete later#not to liveblog and be tmi or whatever but i feel terribly alone and terribly miserable so this is in fact a cry for help lol. or really#comfort bc im fucking going insane. so for context last spring when i was still an intern another intern orchestrated this back channel#where everyone was supposed to talk shit about our supervisors (my dearest most belovedest mentors) and all of us hid it for months and it#all came to a head at asb 2022 because there was a lot of drama witb the asb student facilitators and our staff team. and it was sooooo ugl#and messy and horrible and probably played a direct role in one of my dearest beloved est mentors (who was the point person for asb) fuckin#getting a new job and abandoning us in july lol 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 and so i became a full time staff member and me and my remaining dearest belovedest#colleague besties fucking carried the world on oh r shoulders and put on amazing programs as just 3 of us in the core staff and we thought#we were doing a really good job with the asb 2023 leaders and that there were no drama dynamics or whatever and guess fucking what. tonight#we found out that half of them hate us for reasons we still don’t know and all of them are at each others throats and also some of the#participants feel a type of way about us. and i know i am being a fragile sensitive crybaby over it but i have had terrible cramps all day#and have barely slept since ive been here and feel like ive been bending over backwards to support the leaders only to find out that half o#them think we’re evil and i just… i couldn’t take it. so i cried and now im beating myself up for crying. but it’s like come ON. i know we#did a pretty imperfect job of preparing them for this. and i should just take responsibility for that and not be defensive. but it’s like…#have NEVER seen this program in person before or been part of the planning of it. i was just a student last year like all of you. and also#HOW many fucking times did we create space for you to talk to us and invite us in. and still this shit happened. and i just feel like a#failure. and i couldn’t react to that information in any way except cry liek it’s all so over my head and out of my depth and im not as#emotionally mature as my colleagues bc im the youngest and this is my first time dealing with this and i feel so incompetent and like i#failed. failed the first time by not speaking up when i was implicated in the stupid fucking Google form back channel situation last year#and now failed the second time by not being able to prevent this stupid drama bullshit from happening again and for not catching it. and jf#like… im in excruciating physical pain and haven’t slept and haven’t eaten well and my life is falling apart and we were ABANDONED BY THE#PERSON WHO WAS RESPONDIBLE FOR THIS (i know we weren’t abandoned she literally just got a new job i just have psychological issues) and#we’ve been running at a million miles per hour with absolutely no break and now you’re mad at us and not even telling us and it’s impacting#everyone’s experiences but you want to pretend this is fucking high school and keep secrets. i am TIRED of drama. i am TIRED of this stupid#bullshit. and not to say this bc i don’t know if asb 2022 drama factored into her decision to leave but if it did i get why * left now. i#get it. bc this shit makes me want to jump out the hotel window. i do not want to face any of them tomorrow and deal with more bullshit. i#am emotionally unstable and incompetent and not equipped to deal with this in a mature healthy way. i want this to be over NOW. im done.#ok i think that’s it um. sorry about that i just needed other people to know i am suffering and i will suppress the shame i feel about that#just this once. esp bc i denied myself the opportunity for my colleague besties to comfort me while i was crying and i regret it now lol
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Looking at my schedule got me adding another thing to the long list of 'FUCK MY MANAGER SHE A BITCH' . First off the idiot absolutely REFUSES to let my team lead make the schedule for are departments even though the manager CONSTANTLY complains that she has "SO much work to do". When You know the ONE person that knows what everyone wants and can make sure that if sometime big happens (like the newest guy having a death in his family) things can be you know SCHEDULE AROUND THAT so he can go deal with that and we still be find IS the team lead WE ACTUALLY SEE AND GET TO TALK TO. Unlike are "manage" who also refuses to interact with OVER HALF of the people she is suppose to be over, one of which is me!
Or you also know, NOT SCHEDULE THE ONLY SECOND SHIFT PERSON FOR SUNDAY, ME, FOR MONDAY TO!!
I want to end this place so badly, so fucking badly.
FUCKING MONDAYS! JUST HAD TO START SCHEDULING ME FOR MONDAYS WHEN IM DRAGGED THROUGH THE DIRT AND MUD AND UP A FUCKING MOUNTAIN AND PUSHED OFF A CLIFF ON SUNDAYS ALONE!
#tarudce rants#im going through it right now#give me a moment#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#the back just LOVES this USELESS manager#while everyone shes actually over OR has worked with/been under her before HATES her guts and for good fucking reasons#I WISH i could file a complain something ANYTHING but I cant because all of management INCLUDING THE STORE MANAGER AND THE REGIONALS are al#fucking friends/buddies so bullshit of 'Oh your making a valid complaint about management? but their my friend so ok YOUR fired'#AHHHHHHHHHHH LET IT ALL BURN THE FUCK DOWN I WILL RIP OUT THERE THROATS WITH MY BEAR FUCKING TEETH
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jesus fucking christ the past two months have been insane. if the Things Happening would slow down just slightly that might be cool
#since this year started I have#been sick four times (usually get a cold like once a year maybe)#been in a play#gotten two job interviews and two rejections#gotten another job interview but tested positive for covid the morning of and had to reschedule at the last second#(I'm fine. literally just thought it was a scratchy throat until the test came up positive)#taken a longsword lesson#restarted a pathfinder campaign#and found out my cat is dying#that's not even everything that's just what comes to mind right now#(also about the cat. miss has cancer and right now is at home with pain meds for as long as she still wants to do cat things)#(sad and difficult on my end but she has no idea anything's wrong and hopefully she never will)#oh also I've started shadowing at a vet clinic to decide if I want to pursue vet school#also my mom went to the hospital! she's fine but that was scary#also a family friend died and his funeral turned into preaching about the end times#like what is going ON#for the record. I'm okay. it's just that jesus fucking christ
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"I hate that i let this drag on so long, i hate myself; i hate that i let this drag on so long, you can go to hell" = "And I've enabled it for years! The games-- the binges, the middle-of-the-night phone calls... I should have been the one on the bus; not... you should have been alone on the bus."
he is so self-loathing // casual, chappell roan
#Im genuinely hyperventilating#like im hyperventilating#it feels like someone just punched me in the throat#oh my god oh my .god oh#Heres the progression of what events led up to this. ok#i see this on my dash#i dont watch it fully because i get distracted. but i listen to the song#I listen to this song on repeat for 3 Days#I log onto tumblr hands shaking sweating fucking ripping apart my likes looking for this amv screaming crying#And now we are here. Hi#This is so fucking. Oh my god#Nmy head hurts so bad#jesus christ#Chappell roan x hilson Jesus CHRIST#Op i hope u know u are singlehandedly responsible for making me listen to chappell roan#Shes so fucking good holy shit. pop princess of the decade like i actually do not care#house md#hilson#house md amv#house md edit#hilson amv#hilson edit#Matching “talking down your sister” with the scene of house accompanying wilson to go see his brother#“maybe we'd have an apartment”#Op. i need you to know this#You are a visionary. And im sending you three million dollars in the mail tomrorrow#johan being crazy about yaoi md
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“don’t make me do this. you can stop it here.”
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