#oh my god i am literally screaming crying shitting chairs they are my entire life holy fuck

[sh4rki3-fr0gz]

me when a ship starts absorbing my life so i don't sleep for 3 days because i'm just thinking about them:

[johannesviii]

So uh

The Power of the Doctor surely was one of the episodes of all time

Where do I even fucking start

Let's cut to the chase, narratively it was all over the place in a "let's throw everything at the wall to see what sticks" kind of way. The thing is, it was fun. It made no sense but it was still enjoyable. Why was the Master cosplaying Rasputin? Why 1916? What was the point of the Dalek traitor? Why the paintings? Who cares, I'm having the time of my life watching all this shit 7,5/10

Why Tegan and Ace, for that matter? Because it's fun to see them again, that's why. I'll take it. Tegan was especially great. Also Ace wasn't a CEO so bonus points for that

Why was Graham even here

Why the train

Why the Qurunx

Why the uh everything about the Daleks and the Cybermen and no-one getting betrayed or in-fighting in the process

Why do I care

Dan's arc started with him having no money and ends with him having no house. That's kinda bleak for a comic relief companion

I don't know how to feel about Tennant being the Doctor again? It's weird and interesting and I can't wait to see what they do with this, and I find it supremely ironic that the Doctor who was the most terrified of death is the one who will get to die THREE TIMES in this series - but at the same time, I really wanted to see Ncuti Gatwa and I feel like he's been robbed of his thunder, kind of? I don't know, it feels weird

Considering Chibnall's focus isn't usually on character arcs I wasn't expecting Thirteen's ending to have any kind of dramatic irony, but having very low expectations for this specific era was a blessing, because one of the things I desesperately wanted to see was this control freak of a Doctor, who never explains anything to her friends, being forced to rely entirely on her friends, and also completely losing control. And that's exactly what I got here. Yes. Very good

The Qurunx assuming the form of a child because it wants to be protected. The parallels with the Timeless Child. Exquisite

And that bit where she's hit by a deadly energy blast and she's carried back to the TARDIS like this?? Complete inversion of the trope of the Doctor carrying a companion and I loved it

Oh god look at Yaz. Yeah that's right, you can only hold her while she's literally dying! That's the only time she'll be in your arms! And she's DYING!! And then you have to say goodbye!! I'm feeling normal about this

I've already seen quite a few Thasmin fans screaming bloody murder and to be honest I get it but like. I'm also digging how tragic this is

I wasn't asking for a kiss but like. When they were on the TARDIS' roof. I wanted one of them to put her head on the other's shoulder. Was that too much to ask

Pretty fitting that Yaz joins the circle of Recovering Doctor Addicts at the end after that and oh god don't get me started

The empty chair for Sarah Jane?? Don't talk to me

Is Ian even aware that regeneration exists or was he just like "wait so the Doctor is trans? Good for her"

WHAT WAS THE "POWER" OF THE DOCTOR WAS IS TO LEAVE A SHIT TON OF TRAUMATISED PEOPLE IN THEIR WAKE BECAUSE IF THAT'S WHAT THAT MEANT I'M HOWLING

Here's the Doctor's power! You all need therapy now!!

"How many Doctors are there" GOOD QUESTION NOBODY KNOWS

SPEAKING OF WHICH

FIVE SIX SEVEN AND EIGHT ON SCREEN. I FUCKING SCREAMED

BANTER BETWEEN SEVEN AND EIGHT ABOUT CLOTHES?? HELLO??? THE SURREAL LANDSCAPE?? ADRIC'S DEATH BEING MENTIONED IN NEW WHO?? HELLO????

Why is Ace apologizing to Seven when he should be apologizing to HER and why am I even asking. Who cares that was so cool

Eight on screen EIGHT ON S C R E E N how am I supposed to feel NORMAL ABOUT THIS I WANT TO SCREAM I WANT TO CRY

OH SPEAKING OF WANTING TO CRY

TIME TO GET EMOTIONAL AND CRINGE ON MAIN ABOUT A FUCKING IDIOT WHO SPENT HALF THE EPISODE COSPLAYING RASPUTIN FOR NO REASON AT ALL AND MENTIONING HE USED TO BE A FURRY IN THE EIGHTIES

I turned off Anon asks so if any of you want to send me a new round of hate regarding the fact I love that Master which apparently makes me a fake fan or a Missy hater or something, you'll have to use your actual usernames, cowards. You know who you are

"Johannes shut up about that Master's supposed self-loathing that's not in the text that's just your headcanon to make him more interesting" OH YEAH YEAH CLEARLY I'M MAKING THINGS UP UH CLEARLY THIS IS NOT IN THE TEXT UH

THIS MF'S ENTIRE BULLSHIT PLAN WAS JUST AN EXCUSE TO STOP BEING HIMSELF FOR A MINUTE AND BECOME THE DOCTOR HI HELLO YES I'M FEELING NORMAL ABOUT THIS

"DON'T LET ME GO BACK TO BEING ME"

"DON'T LET ME GO BACK TO BEING ME"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FUCK FUCK FUCK

I'm not making sense right now I'm sorry

"IF I CAN'T BE THE DOCTOR NEITHER CAN YOU" I want to scream I want to punch a fucking wall why are you like this why. are you. like THIS

The feelings are indescribable and I can't put them into words right now and I will have to make some art to make them go away, I don't make the rules I don't even have a choice at this point

TLDR this episode was a badly written narrative mess and full of fanwank and Doctor Who is terrible and I love Doctor Who with all my heart and I feel more alive than ever right now

[rezzyromance]

Idk if this is how you request things or if it's just asking, BUT-

How would the Lords react to an S/O that's usually the chillest person that you will ever meet (not to be confused with a pushover because they are not), they've never seen them even mildly annoyed when something bad happens. But then something happens and, turns out, the S/O is utterly TERRIFYING when they're mad.

Hope this makes sense!

Aw man I'm gonna feel awful scaring Moreau and Donna :(

Alcina

You're relaxing on a beautiful morning. The sun is shining through the window just enough to warm the room but not hurt your eyes. You hadn't even changed out of your sleep wear. "How are you feeling, my dear?", a sweet voice rang from the doorway. You were sitting in your favorite chair near the window. You turn and smile at her. She walks over and rubs your face in her large hand before leaning down and giving you a soft kiss. "I'm feeling amazing. And you?", you grab her hand before she pulls it away and you place a kiss on her knuckles. "I'm feeling alright. There's a new maid here. She's a bit slow. I'm giving her until tonight to finish dusting the entire castle or else she won't see another sunrise." It was almost comedic how dark her words were as you both stared out the window and gazed at the beautiful scenery. "Come on Alcina.", you stand up and place your hands on hers, trying to hold them despite the size difference. "Give the girl a break. It's a huge castle AND it's her first day.", you knew your words would probably change nothing. Alcina was rather cruel, but you looked past it. You tried your best to make the nervous maids comfortable whenever they arrive.

"We'll see how she does." She gives you one more kiss before leaving the room. You sit back down in your chair, enjoying the warmth of the sun for a little while longer. You lose track of time, minutes maybe even hours go by. Suddenly, there's a crash not far from the door. You jump and stand up, no longer comfortable after being startled. "What in the name of Mother Miranda?!", you leave the room and look down the hallway. The new maid stood there with a terrified look on her face. In front of her was one of the paintings Alcina had on her walls, now with a broken frame and a hole punctured. Your blood began to boil. It was a painting of you, her, and the girls all together. It was your favorite. "How in the hell did you manage to do that?!", you begin to stomp towards her. She cowers and struggles to find her words. "I-I-I was just dusting! It fell and I-I didn't mean t-", you cut her off. "How the fuck did you knock such a large painting over just by dusting?! DO YOU THINK YOU'RE ALLOWED TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES HERE?!", you unravel. "I-I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!", she almost begins to weep. "SORRY ISN'T GONNA SAVE YOUR ASS!"

"MISS DIMITRESCU PLEASE HELP!", she cries out. You freeze, realizing that the lady herself is right behind you. You turn to face her. Her eyes are wide with shock. She has never seen you like this before and never even knew you had this type of side to you. She was impressed as much as she was terrified. "(Y/N)? Are you alright my love?" She had no idea what to do as your seething slowed down. "Why don't you go back to the room, yes? Settle down a little and deal with her later.", she places a hand on your back helps walk with you back to the room. Once you're there, she bends down to whisper in your ear. "I don't know where this side of you has been this whole time, but I am so amazed by you. And also a little frightened."

Donna

The Beneviento house was usually a calm place despite its creepy aura. You and Donna are both quiet and chill people. Never once have you fought or even raised your voices at each other. It was pleasant.

You had planned a nice dinner for the both of you. You wanted to try out a new recipe and surprise her, so you made your way to the kitchen to get started. "Okay, what first? I guess I'll need a pot.", you go rummaging through the kitchen and you find the pots stacked within each other inside one of the top cabinets. You groan and stand up on your toes, grazing the pots with your fingers. It didn't take much to cause them to tumble down, crashing on top of you with a loud sound that followed. "Aw shit.", you sighed and picked up the knocked over pots. A small but annoying pain began to throb in your head from where it made contact with a pot. What you didn't notice was you forgot to pick one of the pots up. It remained unnoticed. "It's fine.", you say to yourself as you maintain your composure. Next, a cutting board and knife. You turn around and begin to walk forward to find the cutting board, but you slam your toe into counter. You wince in pain and grab your foot. "SON OF A BITCH!", you yell.

You calm yourself, still wanting to have a pleasant meal with Donna. "Alright. Everything's fine." You step forward and kick the pot that you had forgotten to pick up. It caused your freshly kicked toe to ache even more. "OH COME ON! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!", you scream and swear as you throw your arms up in pure rage and shock.

"...(Y/N)?", a gentle voice whispered from the doorway, causing you to whip your head in that direction. It was Donna. She looked absolutely horrified and almost looked like she could cry. "Is.. is everything... are you alright?", she worried. "Yes. I'm sorry. Just got a little pissed off.", you took a deep breath to calm yourself down, feeling bad for scaring the poor girl.

Moreau

You were sitting on the dock together, looking into the water as your feet swung back and forth above it. It was a sunny day and you two decided to spend it outside. Your hand slowly made its way over to his. His feet stopped swinging for a second as you entangled your fingers. "I don't know what I'd do without you, (Y/N)." his words were bitter sweet as a gentle smile formed from his lips. "Oh, Sal. You don't have to think like that. I'll always be here for you.", you kiss his cheek and continue to relax as you sway your legs.

"There it is! There's the beast!", a voice yelled from not so far away. You both look in the direction of the voice and see a few young village boys. Possibly between the ages of 13 and 16. Moreau had become some what of a scary story for the villagers. A tale that kids spread on school court yard and bring up during dares. But, you've never seen a kid brave enough to actually make it far enough into the reservoir to actually see Moreau. Now, there were about 3. All of them stood and pointed, shocked and terrified.

"Hey beast! Come get me!", one kid teases. You glare at the kids as a newfound rage begins to boil inside you. "Let's go back inside.", Moreau says before standing up from the doc. The sadness in his voice was heartbreaking. Suddenly, one of the children gathers the guts to pick up a rock and throw it as hard as he could. His aim was off, but not by much. It slammed into the wood near Moreau's feet, startling him. "Take that you devil!", he laughs. "THAT'S IT YOU LITTLE SHIT!", you begin sprinting in the direction of the immature brats. Two of them run from the direction they came from while the one who threw the rock was frozen in fear. You took the opportunity to grab him by the collar of his shirt. "Listen here you little waste of space. I'm gonna give you 3 seconds to turn around and run for your goddamn life. If you or any of your little snot-nosed friends come around here again, they'll be goddamn fish food. Do you understand?" The kid was too scared to speak and instead began to nod rapidly. You let him go and watched as he ran as fast as he could, screaming the whole way.

You walk back to the shack and find Moreau standing in the same place he was when you took off. His mouth was agape and he looked almost as scared as the kids. "You alright Sal? I made sure those little shits won't be coming around here anymore." "Yeah... I didn't know you could be so... scary", he says. "I'm sorry. But those kids were being cruel. I had to do something.", you say. "Well... it was awesome!", he smiled. "But also very scary!" You laugh which helps sooth him a little.

Heisenberg

"Screw driver.", is all Karl said with an outstretched palm. He was working on some type of mechanical heart for his experiments. He wanted you to lend a "helping hand" even though he could easily do it all by himself. He did this because he wanted to be around you, he was just too stubborn with too big of an ego to simply say it. So here you were, handing him every little tool he asks for.

"Do you want the big one or the little one?", you say with a hint of boredom in your tone. "Aw c'mon don't sound like that! Isn't this exciting? It's like you're working on it with me! Also, hand me the big one.", you do as he says and hand him the big screw driver. "I just don't get it. You literally have powers. You can easily do this by yourself and have been for so long. Why do you need me to help?" He pauses for a second and looks over towards you, his brow slightly furrowed. "I don't NEED you to help. I just thought it would be nice for you to help out. Plus, you're the one always bitching about me constantly working. Well, here you are! Helping me work! So, either suck it up or you can leave." His harshness had no real ill will in it. He was just confused and a bit too ignorant to consider his words. But, he was testing your patience. He continued to use the screwdriver until handing it to you without saying a word.

"Hand me a screw.", he demanded with his hand facing palm up again. "Which size?" "They're all the same sizes, dumbass." You feel your blood begin to boil. "They're different fucking sizes! This one is smaller than this one!", you hold up two screws that are obviously different sizes. This makes Karl angry. Not because you were right, but because you seemed upset over something that seemed so insignificant.

"If you came here just to yap in my ear, then I don't think I need your assistance.", he huffed. You put the selection of tools and supplies he was making you hold on the table he is working on and ball your fists. "You're the one who told me to do this in the first place!", you yell. "Yeah, because you won't stop bitching! Non-stop you're always compla-" you cut him off before he can finish. "SHUT UP!", you yell. The room goes silent. "YOU SAY I'M BITCHING? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF? JESUS FUCKING CHRIST KARL YOU BITCH AND MOAN ALL THE TIME! I'M DONE TAKING SHIT FROM YOU!" He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He felt something much more overwhelming. Was he.. intimidated? He didn't move from his seat. All he could do was look up at you with a confused expression. What now? What is there to do? If he pushes you further, what would happen? He was actually too scared to find out.

You take a deep breath to calm down before speaking. "Now, if you want me to help with your shit, I'll stay as long as you keep your mouth shut. Can you possibly manage to do that?" He gulps nervously. "Yes ma'am."

[tommydarlings]

I Can't Help Falling In Love With You | t.h

A/N: Okay, wow. Tbh, I'm really proud of this and I hope you like it as much as I do! :) (when this flops, then I'm gonna slide down the suislide :D) anyway, enjoy! :) ily,liz <3

pairing: mob!tom x mob!reader

warnings: smut (fem + male receiving) swearing, unprotected sex, daddy-kink, blowjob, choking, violent actions

w/c: 5.1k (omg)

Requests: CLOSED

Summary: The leader of the London Mafia is the devil in person and you would do everything you can to end him, wouldn't you?

masterlist || taglist || requests ( in my masterlist)

"I'm not gonna talk to him father!" I yelled at my dad.

"Why?! It's strictly about business anyway!" he yelled back at me. "I'm sorry father, but I'm not gonna talk to the devil in disguise" i said in a slightly calmer voice. "It's just for a few minutes and it's strictly about the mob, okay? He won't hurt you or something" my dad answerd. After a while of thinking about it, I agreed.

"Just for a few minutes and not more" i said quietly.

"yes, thank you y/n" i just nodded with my head before I made my way into the huge conference room where the devil should be.

I hate this man. I could kill him. The problem is… he could kill me too… in seconds.

Thomas Stanley motherfucking Holland.

And now I should go to him and try to make a deal with him, that's gonna be fun. Probably we can't even start to talk about the deal because we're just gonna argue. Like usual.

I opened the door and didn't even looked up to look if he was here yet-

"Well hello darling"

Fuck.

"Hello Thomas" I said with a fake smile.

"I already told that you can call me Tom babygirl" he said.

"And I already told you that you should stop calling me these nicknames because I don't like them" I told him. "Well guess what baby, I don't give a single shit about it" he said with a wide smile.

I just scoffed and shook my head before I sat down on one of the chairs in the room. Tom sat down on the chair at the exact opposite of me.

"So, let's talk about the deal, okay?"

"Okay" Tom nodded.

---

1 week later, after we finally finished the deal, I could relax and went into the library in our mansion. Most of the time I don't even have time to read, but when I got time then I use it and read a few pages of my favorite books. It's something that kinda brings me back into the real world and calms me down quickly. So I don't want to get disturbed.

But of course something- no, someone had to disturb me.

"Hello darling" thomas said as he entered the library with both of his hands in the pockets of his black coat.

"What do you want Holland" I spat back angrily.

"Honestly? You"

I was frozen for a second. It's not that I like him or anything, like i already said, I absolutely hate this man, but he is attractive, i can't deny that. No women can deny that.

"Cat caught your tongue babydoll?" he whispered quietly in my ear from behind. Of course I had to stay infront of the bookshelf with my back to him right now.

"Hmm?" he said in my ear again while I was still pretty frozen.

"get the fuck out of my way Tom" I said with a slightly nervous voice. Suddenly he put both of his arms on my shoulders and slowly traced his fingertips down my arms. I literally started to shiver as he said that,

"pretty little thing" he whisper right in my ear and left a gently peck on the side of my neck. Then he put both of his hands in mine and slowly rubbed this thumb over my hand.

And I let him. I fucking let him.

"I know that you like it baby, I know it" he whispered in the back of my neck before he started to leave kisses at the side of my neck. He was so gentle and soft. His lips were so warm and they felt so fucking good, wait what-

"Okay, stop" I said as I turned around and pushed him away.

"That's sad, it looked like you really enjoyed it darling" he said while he slowly approached me again. As he took the first step forward, I took one backwards but then I remembered that my back is already against the shelf.

Well fuck.

As he stood infront of me, he put both of his hands next to my head and leaned really close. Our noses were nearly touching.

"You don't have to lie to me princess, you know? And when you really wanna test me, then I dare you to do that, we both know that I'm gonna win babydoll" he whispered quietly while he looked me deep in the eyes.

"You may be a Holland, but don't forget that I'm a y/l/n honey" I told him while I held eye contact.

"Cause you exactly know what I'm capable of, you already saw me fighting and taking your men down easily" I added.

"And you exactly know what I'm capable of babygirl"

"Oh please, you are just as weak as your men are Holland" I said with a quick laugh.

"I'm not talking about fighting love" he said with a tiny smirk.

"About what then champ?" I said with a little smile on my face.

"You know what I'm the best at?" he said as he slowly leaned closer so his mouth was hovering over my ear.

"What" I asked before I rolled my eyes.

"Punishments" he whispered.

And as soon as he said that my smile faded and I was frozen… again.

"I knew you would be quiet as soon as I said that. Have you ever got punished before? You know like, did you ever got a few good spanks and a few edges-"

"shut up Thomas" I spat quietly at him.

"You get turned on from the thought of me spanking you and edging you until you beg me to stop, don't you?"

"I-I, n-no i-I don't" I stuttered.

"Don't lie to me princess" he said while he looked me in my eyes again.

"I don't" I said while I looked down at my feet. "Can you say that while you look me in the eyes?" he asked.

I looked him in the eyes, but I couldn't get a single word out.

"That's what I thought" he said before he put both of his hands back in his pockets again and went to the door.

"Where a-are you g-going?" Why did I asked that?!

"I'm gonna go back to work, if you need someone that makes you scream and cry at same time, and I don't mean that in a painful way, then you know where I am" he said before he opened the door and left.

"God please help me" I quietly prayed before I left the library too and went to the gym.

---

"Tom, let me through" I said in a pretty calm voice.

"No" he answered with a tiny smirk.

"Thomas please! I have to be in the meeting like, right now!" I raised my voice at him.

"And?" he asked while he looked down at me. Sadly I'm shorter than him. "And?! When my dad finds out that you are keeping me up here then you. are. dead, holland." he lightly chuckled before he spoke up,

"That would be a shame wouldn't it?" he said with a wide grin while slowly raced his hand and stroked my cheek with his knuckles. "Tom stop" I told him angrily. "You are so sweet when you're angry, you know?"

"Fuck. off" I whispered while I looked him deep in the eyes. That was the last thing i said to him before I pushed him angrily away and stormed through the door.

"Where the fuck where you y/n?" my dad asked with a slightly aggressive voice. I didn't knew which kind of lie I should tell him, so I told him the truth.

"Tom distracted me" I said while I took a seat. "Tom Holland?" he said while he looked at me. "Of course the holland boy dad, who else?" I spat. "Not in that tone young lady" he spat back angrily before he sat down in his own chair and scoffed before he started to talk about some mob business shit while I held back my tears.

It's not that I hate this life, or the mob, it's just that I would love when someone would give me some love.

---

"Thomas, I already told you that it was a mistake" I yelled at him. "But this mistake could have killed you" he yelled back at me. I looked him deep in the eyes before I quietly said,

"Why do you even care?"

He just stared at me with an open mouth and slightly wide eyes. He looked at me like he just got caught stealing something. "I-I don't care about you or anything, i-i could have been dead too, a-and w-when you would have been i-in trouble, t-then I wouldn't have hesitate to save MY ass"

Slowly, a smile made it's way to my face before I spoke up again,

"You're lying" I whispered.

"I d-don't lie'' he said quietly. "You do, because every time when you lie, you stutter thomas" he slowly approached me. Probably a habit of him. As he stood right infront of me, he looked me right into the eyes. He basically looked me right into the soul before he said,

"I didn't lied and I don't care about you. When you would get killed, then I would stand next to your corpse and would be sad that I didn't killed you" he slowly said.

And as he said that, I just thought one thing,

Don't fucking cry now y/n, you already know that nobody loves you.

I exactly knew that he hates me, just like I hate him, but I would have never said something that cruel to him. But of course I couldn't stop the tears they were threatening to spill. I looked down at my feet before I quickly wiped the tear away.

"Are you cryi-"

"I hate you" I said before he could finish his sentence. The last thing I saw before I stormed out of the big conference room, was a guilty look painted on Tom's face.

---

I sat silently in my bedroom and thought about a few things,

'I can't', 'I can't fucking like him', 'I can't fucking love him', 'It's impossible'. I thought the entire time. We are enemies since the second we saw each other. We hate each other. We have to, we don't have another option. Why am I even thinking about that? He hates me and I should hate him. But I can't. It's not that I adore this man and would do anything for him, I would just sacrifice my life for him-

Fuck.

I'm head over heels for him.

Suddenly someone knocked on my door.

"Come in" I said. Suddenly Tom came in, wearing a tight white button up shirt and dark blue dress pants. He looked so unbelievably hot but at the same time he was my enemy. I thought about his messy hair and rosy cheeks and red lips, they look so fucking soft, I would love to kiss them and touch his body-

"You good y/n?" he asked as he sat down next to me on the bed. And of course he had to spread his legs and fold his hands.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine" I answered quickly. God I'm so done.

"I wanted to apologize for what I said earlier, so… I'm sorry"

Did he just seriously apologized? Wow.

"It's okay, you were right" I said with a tiny but sad laugh. "You were right" he suddenly said. "What do you mean?" I said while I looked at him. Tom got up and stood now infront me.

"I do care about you"

"What?"

"You were right, I lied. I really care about y/n, and I'm sorry that I treated you that way"

"Seriously?" I got up now too and stood right infront of him. He just nodded quickly before he said,

"yes, uhm, that's it, I'm gonna go now, by dollface" he said with a tiny smirk before he left the room.

"fuck off" I laughed while I made my way downstairs.

---

"I hate work" I quietly whispered to myself while I buried my head in my hands desperately. Suddenly the door opened and Tom walked in. "Get out of here" he said without any sign of kindness. "What?" I asked with a laugh. "I think you heard me princess, out. of. here" I stood up from my chair and scoffed before I walked over to him.

"No" I said with a tiny grin.

"No?, darling I'm in charge here, okay?, so you're gonna walk out of this room and let me do my work that I have to do, alright?" he said pretty seriously. I shaked my head with a smile painted on my face. "I don't wanna drag out of the room y/n, c'mon" he said with a hint of anger in his voice but I shaked my head and he scoffed. "Why can't you just listen for once." Out of nowhere he grabbed my throat and pressed me against the wall behind me. "You're gonna listen to me" he whispered before he went on,

"When I tell you to do something, then your gonna do it, don't you?" he asked while he looked at me. That went right to my pussy.

"And what are you gonna do when I don't want to do what you say?" of course y/n y/l/n tried to push his buttons. "Then it's gonna get a big big mess babygirl" he smiled. He fucking smiled.

"A bloody mess?" I asked with a grin. "No, no, not a bloody mess but a wet mess" he whispered.

"fuck you" I whispered. "oh yes, I'm gonna do that" he said before he crashed his lips on mine harshly. He put both of his hands on my cheeks while I opened his button up shirt and pulled it off of his body. Just a few seconds later he pulled my shirt off and threw it to the side. "You're eager, aren't you?" I asked while he put his pants off. God his body is a masterpiece.

"Shut up" he said while I put my pants and bra off. "Make me" I said. He looked me in the eyes with a tiny smirk before he picked me up and laid me down onto the table. He went down on his knees infront of me and pulled my panties down my legs before he started to give tiny kitten licks to my already wet pussy.

"Fuuuuck" I whispered before he started to really eat me out. "Fuck daddy" I cried out. "Say that again" Tom said before he sucked on my clit and flicked his tongue over it afterwards. "Oh my God, please daddy" I cried out even louder. He flicked my clit with the tip of his tongue so fast and good that I came quickly.

"FUCK, your gonna make me cum" I said quietly while I arched my back. But after he made me cum, he didn't stopped. He went on with flicking the tip of his tongue quickly over my sensitive clit. I started to wiggle away from him but he grabbed my legs and put me back in place again. "Shh, just a little bit more" he whispered. Suddenly he spit right on my pussy and collected the spit with two fingers before he shoved his wet fingers into my pussy. "Oh my g-god, please" I stuttered out.

He started to pump his finger faster and faster and after a few seconds he found the spot that made me go crazy. "Ahhh fuck daddy please, please, please" I screamed.

"Come for me doll, come for daddy" he said while he looked me in the eyes. You heard right. He looked me in the eyes while he ate. me. out.

"FUCK" I yelled as I came for the second time on his tongue and fingers. After he cleaned me up, he stood up and looked at me.

"You're gonna be a good girl and take my cock?" he asked. "Yes Daddy" I answered back quietly. "Good girl" he whispered in my ear before he pulled his boxer down and started to enter me. "oh fuck" I quickly cursed before he started to ram into me mercilessly.

"So fucking tight, such a good girl, just for me, right?" I just nodded with my head before my eyes rolled into the back of my head quickly. Suddenly he put his hand on my throat again and lightly choked me. And fuck was that good.

"Feels so good d-daddy" I whispered. He put the thumb of his other hand on my clit and started to rub it quickly.

"OH MY GOD" I cried out really loud. "Take it, take it, take it" tom spat quietly. "I'm gonna cum daddy" I told him. He went even faster, with his cock and his thumb. And then my orgasm washed me while I screamed as loud as I could while tears were running down my cheeks.Tom shut his eyes tightly and let out a tiny 'fuck' after he came. But I couldn't even notice more before I blacked out.

---

I woke up in my bed, but I could remember exactly what happened yesterday in the conference room. The worst thing is, I still like, no, love this man. How? I honestly don't know. He just makes me… weak.

I threw my work clothes on and went downstairs into the conference room to see if my father was there but the only person that was in the room was the one and only Tom of course.

"Oh, hello darling" he said politely.

"Hello?" I said but it kinda sounded more like a question. "Are you okay?" he asked me. I just nodded with my head before I made my way to the door again but Tom's hand on my wrist stopped me immediately. "Can we talk?" he suddenly said pretty shy. I just nodded again while I turned around to face him and leaned back against the door. "What's up" I said. What the fuck y/n?! Why would you say 'what's up'? You exactly know what happened yesterday and you can't change it. Neither of you can. What you two didn't knew is that neither of you too wanted to change it.

"Can we maybe talk about last night?" he suddenly said. "Yeah, yeah of course, what about last night?" I asked quietly. "I-I, fuck, I don't know how to say that-" but before he could finish his sentence, I interrupted him,

"You think it was a mistake and you asked me to forget it and to not mention it ever again because you hate me and that was just a stupid one night stand thing for you" I told him. He just stared at me for multiple seconds before he opened his mouth and spoke up,

"No"

"What do you mean with 'no'?"

"y/n, I know how I treated you and how rude and cruel I am to you, but that what we did last night wasn't a damn one night stand" he said calmly. "What was it then to you?" I asked him.

"What was it to you?" he asked me back. I had to swallow before I answered,

"I don't think that it meant the same to you as it meant to me" I said quietly while I looked at him. He let out a tiny laugh before he said,

"It meant a lot to me" hold on what did he just said?!

"What, s-seriously?" I asked with already glassy eyes. I just dreamed right?

"Y/n, when I told you that I would save my ass and that I would be happy when you would be dead, then I didn't meant that at all. I care about you, a lot actually and I would rather sacrifice my ass to save yours" he said with a tiny laugh.

I slowly approached him and asked,

"You are not lying?"

"I'm not lying"

As soon as he said I leaned forward gave him a tiny peck to test if he really wants that, and yes he does, he leaned forward and kissed me properly on the lips while he put of his hands softly on my waist and I put my hands on his shoulders. He slowly started to walk forward so that i had to walk backwards and backed me up against the wall, at first I thought that we are gonna the same thing like last night but he just put one of his hands on my cheek and looked me deep in the eyes.

"I really like you y/n"

"I really like you too"

He kissed my forehead gently before we went on with our little make out session.

---

"Tom, no!" I yelled at him. "Why not?!" he yelled back loudly. "Because, when my dad is gonna catch us in the conference room then we are both dead and you know that!" I screamed at my boyfriend.

Tom wanted to make out in the conference room, that my father is probably gonna enter soon. "Who gives a fuck about him" he yelled back at me. "Tom, how do you think my dad will look at us when he sees us not sliding each other's throats!, What do you think is he gonna do huh?!"

"But we are together y/n, we are in a relationship and we are fucking adults so we are allowed to do that! We love each other!"

"In this world is no place for love Thomas!"

Silent.

I instantly regret what I said. I looked at him and I could already see tears building up in his eyes.

"So you don't love me?" he asked quietly and unsure. "No! That not what I meant. Tom, it's just that this world wasn't made for love, okay? I know that we love each other, you love me and I love you, so so so much tommy but this world that we are living in is dangerous, okay?" I told him before I slowly approached him. I put my hands in his hands and gave him a small but gentle peck on the cheek.

"I love you" I whispered.

"I l-love you too darling" he said quietly.

"I'm so sorry for what I said, I hope you forgive me" I said while I laid my head on his chest. He is always so warm and caring and gentle with me.

"Yeah baby, I forgive you" he said with a tiny smile on his gorgeous face. "Thank you" I answered before I pecked his nose. "I'm gonna take a shower" I said quietly while I looked him deep in the eyes. "Mind if I join?" he asked with a smirk. "Not at all… " I slowly leaned forward to whisper in his ear and said,

"daddy"

Before I could even blink, he threw me over the shoulder and made his way to the bathroom.

---

"Fuuuuck babygirl, you take me so well" he whispered while I tried to take his entire member in my mouth. And fuck was that hard because he was so big. Suddenly he started to thrust his hips and I gagged loudly. "You can take it kitten, I know you can" he spat quitely. Tears were rolling down my cheeks as I gagged around him, but It was so fucking hot and rough Tom is the best thing you can get. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum" he said while he shut his eyes. After he came, I swallowed everything and then I stood up and we got out of the shower. He grabbed the back of my neck tightly and turned me around. Our noses touched while he looked me deep in the eyes. "You're mine, understand?" I nodded with my head quickly before he spoke up again,

"That was a great shower don't you thing doll" he said with a huge grin on his face after he let my neck go slowly. I just rolled my eyes before I started to dry my body with my towel. But before I could take my brush to brush through my hair and get the knots out, tom took the brush from my hand and started to gently brush my hair while he stood behind me just in a Calvin klein boxer and grey sweatpants. He gently brushed through them while I watched him in the mirror infront of me. "Mhhmm" I moaned with a tiny smile written on my face. "Don't moan or I'm gonna take you right against the counter princess" he slowly whispered into my ear while he still brushed gently through my hair. "sorry… daddy" he just scoffed before he gave me the 'warning gaze'. I started to laugh and he put the brush aside to grab the lotion. "Are you laughing at me?" he asked with 'fake shook' on his face. "Sorry bubu, your just so sweet" I said between laughter. "You're even sweeter my love" he answered as he applied some lotion on my back and slowly rubbed it in. "That feels good baby, thank you" I said. "No, thank you" he told me while he looked in the mirror where our eyes met. "For what?" I asked with a tiny smile. "For being the best girlfriend ever" he whispered before he gave me a small peck on my temple. I smile before I answerd,

"I love you so damn much Tommy" he rubbed his hands slowly over my shoulders before he spoke up,

"I love you too princess" I used to hate this name, but now I love it.

---

I sat in my room, crying silently on my bed all alone. To have a dad that is just focused on the mob and basically didn't gives a single shit about his own daughter Is hard and it fucking hurts. But luckily i got a caring boyfriend that should be here any minute-

"Hey babygirl, what's wrong?" he asked as he came into the bedroom. "Is it your dad again?" he added after a while. I just nodded with my head before I started to let more sob's out. "No, no, no, you know that I don't like it when you cry princess" he said as he sat down next to me and pulled me into his chest. He hold me tightly in his arms before I spoke up,

"I'm s-sorry" he just looked at me before he said,

"For what?" I looked at him briefly before I looked down at my lap again. "For i-interrupting you t-tommy"

"No, no, there's nothing to be sorry about, okay? I love you and I'm gonna be here for you, you understand?" I nodded with my head quickly before I looked him deep in the eyes. Suddenly he pulled me on his lap so that I straddled him and laid both of his hands on my hips. We both looked at each other's lips briefly before I slowly leaned in and captured his soft lips in a gentle kiss. "I" kiss. "love" kiss. "you" kiss. "so" kiss. "much" kiss. I laughed at him before I kissed his forehead gently and said,

"I love you too so much"

"Can we cuddle?" I added. Tom laughed before he answered,

"Of course darling, anything for you"

I laid down while Tom laid behind me and he threw his hand around me and pulled me into him. "Good night Tommy" I whispered. "Good night baby" he whispered back before we both fell into a deep but wonderful sleep.

---

It was the worst day of your life. Tom was kneeling on the ground, I stood behind him and my father stood infront of us with his gun pointed at me while I had my gun against Tom's temple. Yes, you heard right. Tom's fucking temple.

"Kill him y/n, prove your father that you are strong enough to lead the mob, just like me princessa" my father told me while tears started to build up in my eyes. My father found out about Tom's and my relationship. He went crazy, he freaked out and yelled at us and went absolutely mad. I saw a lot sides from my father already, but not this one. And it kinda made me shit my pants. He demanded me to shoot Thomas so I could prove to him that Tom would be a bad influence for me and the mob. The things is that I would rather die that kill my own fucking boyfriend. Only problem, my father doesn't care.

"You k-know that i-i can't father" I whispered while tears were rolling down my cheeks. "Just do it y/n, it's okay, we had a great time didn't we?" Tom slightly laughed but then I could hear him sob. My father just laughed before he spoke up,

"That's no love that you little kids have, that's just some random bullshit, shoot him" he answered with a laugh. Tom swallowed and I couldn't stop the tears. We both couldn't. "I love you princess, so much" Tom whispered quietly. I just shaked my head while I let sob's out and looked at my dad again. "I don't give a-a fuck a-about the m-mob anymore, I love t-Tom and when you c-can't accept t-that then I'm really sorry" I quietly said. My dad laughed before he said,

"Wait, what do you mean with 'then I'm really sorry' y/n?" he asked.

"I love Thomas, and I fucking hate you" I said before I shot my father in his right shoulder. Tom closed his eyes tightly but when I put both of my hands in his cheeks he opened them again. "Are you okay?" Tom asked me quickly. I nodded with my head before I hugged him tightly. "I'm so sorry baby" I shaked my head quickly and answered,

"No, I'm sorry"

"No, you shouldn't be, I'm supposed to protect you, to protect you from situations like that doll, but I didn't and I'm so sorry" he said quietly. "It's okay Tommy, I love you" "I love you too" he said before we shared a loving kiss. After that, Tom and i got up and went to my father who was laying desperately on the ground.

"Fuck you daddy" I told him.

"Why p-princess, w-why" he weakly asked. Before I could response, Tom spoke up,

"By the way, your daughter calls me daddy too" he said with a wink. And those were the last words my father heard. The best last words even in my opinion. I laughed at my boyfriend before he picked me up and ran towards the bedroom.

"What are you doing?" I asked between laughter. "Oh, I'm just gonna make you beg, scream and cry, okay?" he asked. And as soon as I heard these words I was screwed.

"Yes daddy"

"Good girl"

-`ღ´- ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ -`ღ´-

Taglist:

@goodgirlgonetom @majo240820 @misshale21 @itstaskeen @pure-ghost @justafangirlduh @elizabeth-brown @roseke @onyourgoddamnleft @lovelyxtom

[azucanela]

Can i please have a headcanons for Keigo and Shinsou with a female s/o that really likes manga and anime but keeps it a secret from others because they talk shit and make fun of her? and like one day they accidently find out and she's kinda embarressed about it but they convince her that everything is fine and they think ist cute how happy they are when they talk about something she loves? Uwu :9 (sorry for my bad english)

secret anime and manga fan s/o headcannons  [ft. keigo takami, shinsou hitoshi]

SUMMARY: Y/N has been hiding the fact that she likes anime and manga from her lovely boyfriend for a while now, fearing he’d find it weird. now, she has no choice but to address the fact that he knows. 

WORD COUNT: 1.6k

WARNINGS: threats

A/N: your english is great bb! uwu owo this was relatable askdakjhds if anyone tells you there is something wrong with watching anime or reading manga, let me tell you that they are WRONG. i will fight them for you<3

KEIGO TAKAMI | PRO HERO HAWKS

you used to talk about animes you liked because at the end of the day they are tv shows thats it, same with mangas, they are like books but cooler lol

but people found that “weird” for some reason, because anime is a “cartoon” and thats so gross omg haha these “cartoons” make me sob um watch a silent voice and cry with me kids

anyways

you’re watching anime in the comfort of your home, just vibing. no one is coming over today, you have time to yourself to enjoy your lil show that nobody should be judging you for

well, you thought no one was coming over

keigo has a tendency to just like, show up at your house sometimes when hes bored or in the midst of an uneventful patrol. though he rarely is seen in public, especially on the streets, he does fly-bys constantly

anyways, he was bored, or just relieved of duty for whatever reason, like lunch. he is having chicken nuggets, he is a cannibal, be ashamed H A W K S, smh

anyways, he just shows up at your house, like he lowkey breaks in through the balcony of your apartment, but its fine because you leave it open for him, but normally he texts you to let you know he’s coming but today was the exception because he’s adorable and wanted to surprise!!! you!!! with!!! food!!!

so he comes in, and he sees you are on your couch, just watching your lil anime, and you are SO INTO IT MAN like you are lowkey yelling at the TV whenever a character does something, and when that one character you hate comes on you’re like throwing hands with nothing

keigo is internally screaming because why are you so CUTE

he kinda forgets for a second that you don’t know he’s there, he has no idea what’s going on in this show, and he’s still holding chicken nuggets and fries

this is why he just kinda screams at a character who does something stupid, that totally could’ve been avoided, effectively startling you

now you are both screaming for separate reasons as you turn around to look at him, and now you are panicking because oh no, he KNOWS 

his wings are fluttering and he feels bad for scaring you as he comes up to wrap his arms around your shoulders, “sorry baby! but that guy is so dumb.”

you are MORTIFIED and now you’re like, “oh my god, you must think im so weird-”

keigo is confused, why would he think that? he genuinely doesn’t realize that people make fun of you for watching anime and he’s so confused by it when you inform him that a lot of people tend to find it weird 

“what?”

“people think its weird so i just-” hahahhasdha keigo lowkey wants to take time out of his day in his professional agency to find out who told you it was weird and made you think you had to hide this from him because he wants to know everything about you! you are the love of his life! you shouldn’t feel the need to hide things!

now he feels like maybe he did something to make you think you had to hide your love for anime even though it is literally adorable to watch you

“baby, it’s not weird. i actually think its cute how angry you get at the characters. and i AGREE like how could he just do that-”

“wait you don’t care...?” you are BLUSHING because he thinks you are CUTE not that you didn’t know this already since he was dating you but like

omg

“of course not, also would you mind restarting this anime, im kind of invested- oh and i brought chicken nuggets”

you lowkey wanna cry he’s so cute

he can tell you don’t believe him so he sets the food down on a coffee table and takes your face in his hands and is all like, “baby. i promise you its fine. and adorable. now let’s restart this show so i can watch with you.”

he winks at you and now you’re like, “whatever no i am NOT restarting.”

then he gets all pouty but its fine he doesn’t need to understand the plot to watch with you and enjoy every moment, he also likes when you explain it really excitedly with all these hand movements, and he especially enjoys when you get mad at characters

he finds it hot 

hates when you have a crush on a character he gets so jealous and is not afraid to show it kjahsdahsdsh mans will start hating the character just because you keep talking about how hot they are

“they’re just so BEAUTIFUL.”

keigo, self consciously touching his winds, “im beautiful too...”

he’s so cute

throws popcorn at the screen whenever that character comes on

SHINSOU HITOSHI

hahjsdgjasgdj

THIS BOY is so pretty

anyways you probably fell asleep reading manga, or watching anime or something like that, so it’s like 1AM and you were BINGING because that stuff is great and nobody is there to bother you while you read and watch and stuff its you time

and for some reason people have been opposed to this in the past? so now whenever people come to your room your manga are all like lowkey hidden and you make sure there is no evidence of anima

you did NOT want shinsou finding out and thinking you were weird or anything like that, even though liking anime and manga is NOT weird!!!

if anyone tells you other lmk and i will have strong words with them

so you fell asleep and shinsou comes over because he realizes he forgot something in your room, and like the GENTLEMAN he is, he knocks, but you are asleep and do not hear him!

he’s like eh worst case scenario she’s cheating on me and i end up heartbroken, and this is something he genuinely considers sometimes and he would definitely blame himself if he got cheated on

so he sees you sleeping and you are like a mess because you did not intend to fall asleep, so you’re like in your desk chair, the manga is wide open on your desk or your computer is on and there’s the still going anime aksjdhkjdhas

your neck is in a weird funky way that’ll probably hurt in the morning and shinsou is like oh no i gotta move her i dont want her in pain, he is also wondering why you look so cute because what the hell this is unfair stop it

tbh he probably barely notices the manga, like he’ll just nonchalantly close it and place it on your bedside table because reading manga isn’t weird before coming back to you, in the chair, and like picking you up to put you in bed

now you AWAKEN AND YOU ARE A L E R T because it hits you pretty fast that shinsou is here, this is NOT a dream, he probably saw your manga/anime, and now hates you and is carrying you to your death

this is all false

in the midst of your panic, you knock the both of you down onto the ground, and he’s feels so bad for allowing the two of you to fall nkjasdjakn poor bb

“Y/N im so sorry-”

“hitoshi why are you apologizing?”

he just ignores that and he comes over to you on the floor but your gaze is on the closed computer on your desk or the manga that was placed on your bedside table that you DEFINITELY DID NOT PUT THERE

he saw, he definitely saw, and now you are babbling about how weird he must think you are because of those JERKS who made you think anime and manga are weird

“what are you talking about?”

“well, people always told me how weird it was and sometimes they would... say things”

shinsou quickly realizes you were bullied because you liked manga and anime and stuff like that and now he is contemplating murder <3 what a lovely boyfriend

as someone who has experience with bullying himself, he finds this especially stupid, its literally just a show and book, and kinda wants to ask you the names of the people who told you these things so he can hunt them d o w n

instead shinsou prioritizes you and your insecurities first, “babe... no. its just anime? there’s no problem with watching it. whoever told you that was just a jerk.” jk he uses more colorful vocabulary

shinsou is completely ready to spend the next hour convincing you that there is nothing to worry about because there really isn’t 

“so you don’t think its weird?” his heart almost breaks when he hears your voice and he just nods and gives you a lil smile

“not at all... actually i was wondering what was so interesting that you stayed up until” he’s looking at the time, “2AM.”

now you’re blushing but you still launch into an explanation of the entire anime and honestly anime/manga plots are so extensive and cool and well done and that just makes them so fun and complicated to explain

shinsou is trying his hardest to understand but you are very cute as you explain using lots of vivid hand gestures and adorable faces and wow he’s been distracted

will try his hardest to understand so that you can talk with him about it more often, genuinely finds it great watching you tell him about something you enjoy so much and hates that you felt the need to keep it a secret

he wonders how many times you hid away the manga or anime when he came over and feels like an inconvenience 

anyways he really really really likes you so now he just listens as you rant about how cute certain characters are and lowkey gets jealous

“WHY IS HE SO HOT.”

“he’s not... that hot.” grumbling and stuff as he plays with the edge of his sleeve and borderline glares at the screen.

A/N: i hope this wasn’t bad akshfjakshdkjh 

[storysofmyown]

Obey me! Scarred, Chapt. 7

Plot: It’s time for the next step in Diavolo’s plan to unify the  realms. But, in order to work, the demons would be subjected to confront  their worst fears, and in some cases, who they are.

Trigger warning: None that i can think of

Word count: 2377

“Ya got to be kiddin’ me, I ain’t gonna wear this weird…uh…um…shirt I guess? To the damn ball.” Mammon threw the garment at Asmodeous bed, who made a cartoonish shriek.

 “Mammon! You idiot! Do you have any idea how long it takes to steam the wrinkles off? And you are not going to do it, so its me the one who has to put their skin at risk in that heat just because you can’t be careful.” Asmodeous took the piece of clothe and hanged it on his closet, making sure no wrinkle was visible.

 “Whatever, I don’t care. I have more important things to be doing than playing dress up with you two.”

 “Who said I was playing dress up?” Mc looked up from the bed, barely maintaining eye contact with Mammon.

 “Then why are ya here?”

 “You literally dragged me out of my room so I would accompany you here.” Mc sat down; their eyes now open but not focusing on anything. “Plus, Asmo said there would be wine, so.” Asmodeous laughed and stuck his tongue out at Mammon, who huffed and growled in response. “C’mon, just sit down. Everything in here has been so chaotic since…well, God arrived that Lucifer has a headache 24/7. We are the only ones acting normal.” Mc sighed, they were worried for the others, but the demos refused to talk about what had happen, what that caused them to act this way.

 “That’s not true, Levi hasn’t left his room in three whole days. That’s very Levi of him.” Asmo gave Mammon a glass of wine before sitting on the bed. Mammon made a point of sniffing it in case Asmo put anything weird in it, before just chugging everything down in one go.

 “That ain’t entirely true. The other day, I went to see Levi, and the dweeb wasn’t doing anything. And I don’t mean as in, wasting time playing games and shit, no, he was literally buried under at least seven blankets and was just starring at Henrys tank all the time. Barely even acknowledge me.”

 “Is that so?” Prompted Asmo.

 “I payed him a visit. There was no sound on or anything, I called him, and he just yelled for me to leave him alone. I want to help but how can I help when he won’t tell me what’s wrong?” Mc groaned; they loved the seven idiots. At this point they were family to Mc, and that meant what affected the boys affected them.

 “That is a little weird of him. I mean, he would never reject anyone that offered to watch anime or play videogames with him.” Asmo refilled all the cups.

 The three of them stayed silent for a moment. Asmodeous chewed on his lower lip before sighing.

 “Has Satan talked to any of you?” Mammon and Mc shook their heads. “Me neither, I tried giving him a book the other day, and he literally threw it at my face. He is out of control.” Once again, silence, this time broken by Mammon.

 “What about Belphie and Beel? I haven’t seen Beel eat more than half a plate of food for over a week now. He IS the Avatar of Gluttony. His whole thing is food.”

 “We baked him some cupcakes to try and cheer him up. He didn’t even touch them.” Asmo replied, pointing at Mc and then at himself. “Like, I know they were probably not that good, but they were better than Solomon’s cooking, which mean Beel would normally have eaten them with no problem.”  

 “Belphegor hasn’t slept in days.” Mc starred at their now empty cup.

 “How do ya know that?”

 “He won’t leave my room. He has stayed with me for a couple days, every time I wake up, I see him awake. All he does is stare at a bracelet on his hand.” Mc looked up at Asmo and Mammon, they all had the same expression on their faces.

 “Anyway,” Asmo tried to sound as chipper as possible, forcing a smile on his lips. “Mammon, you said you had some more important things to care about. What is that all about?”

 “Oh, so you know that one-time Mc…Belphie and I working at Hell’s Kitchen?” Mammon’s voice went quiet when mentioning Belphegor before picking up the tone he had started the sentence with. “Well, the dudes still had my phone, and it seems that a customer wants me personally to do his delivery. And get this, they will pay whatever amount I demand, all so I, the Great Mammon deliver some food and stuff. Can you believe this?” Mammon rested his back on the backrest of the chair while taking a long sip.

 “That sounds a little suspiciou-” Asmodeous was cut short by Mc’s tired voice.

 “I’m worried about them.” Silence fell momentarily in the room. None of them daring to speak up. The situation was getting worse by the day, their family was hurting, and they didn’t even knew why. It was scary, knowing that people you loved were going trough something and not being able to do anything about it.

 “So am I” Lucifer’s voice cut in, pulling a chair and taking a whole bottle of wine that had yet to be open.

 “Oi! How long have you been listening in?” Mammon jumped at Lucifer’s voice before sitting straight in the chair.

 “There was no need for me to “listen in”, you three were talking loud enough that I could hear it in the kitchen.” The bags under the man’s eyes were noticeable, he had a demeanor that screamed how little care the man was putting on himself. His form seemed weaker and his tone did not have the usual authoritative undertone. Lucifer popped off the cork of the bottle and took a long sip. He wasn’t wearing his usual coat, vest open and with no tie.

 “Are you okay?” Mc asked, leaving their cup on the side. Lucifer only gave a dry sarcastic laugh before just looking at the ceiling.

 “Am I okay? Of course, why wouldn’t I be? It’s not like ever since I saw my father’s face, I have been plagued with nightmares of him hurting another member of my family. Or the fact that when we are supposed to as closer as we can possible be, my brothers and my own son are more shut off than ever. Satan went back to hating me with every fiber of his being, Beelzebulb won’t talk to anyone, Belphegor and Leviathan have just shut off completely from the entire world.” Lucifer sighed, passing a hand through his hair.

 Asmodeous felt tempted to take the bottle off from Lucifer, the man was not feeling well, and having him drunk would not do any good. He tried to do so, but Lucifer only shook his head, looking at Asmo, giving his younger brother a small smile before he caught Mammon starring. His expression was that of a child who had found out Santa Clause was not real, of a child whose hero turned out to be just a man who could get hurt, bleed, and die.

 In all their years alive, Mammon had never seen Lucifer in such a helpless manner. It was like whatever drive had been keeping him functioning had met its limit, needed replacement or something. The man who was more of a father to any of them that their actual father could ever be, the man who, even though was the literal personification of pride, threw his reputation and believes away and damned himself to a life of servitude all so his little sister could have a shot at a normal life. Mammon would never say this out laud, but he appreciated how much Lucifer had sacrificed for their family.

 “Lucifer, I-” Mammon was shushed when Lucifer put up his hand.

 “I never told you two, or anyone else for that matter, about this but…after we fell, and Diavolo gave us this house, I promised myself I would do anything to keep my family together, because as long as I had you guys, I thought it would be okay. After all, we had gone through a hell of a war… and yet, somehow, we were still together, even if Lilith wasn’t there with us, I knew she was happy. And I wanted that for us as well, I wanted us to be happy. All of us.” Lucifer chuckled.

 For a few seconds, after Lucifer finished, he laughed slightly, with a somber tone to his voice. Before getting up and walking towards the door, once at the edge of it, he turned around, barely even looking at the three stunned members of his family. He wondered where he had gone wrong, where everything had gone to shit, the reasons why he couldn’t protect his family and why were they going through stuff they don’t deserve. He felt his heart ache at the memories of a lifetime ago, at the times up with his Father when they thought he loved them.

 He thought of Lilith and how much love she had to give; she was his little sister. And he would have given everything to protect her and every single member of his family, he would crawl through all the realms and sink to the bottom before trading his own life if it was necessary. But he couldn’t, even if he wanted to. He was stuck with the weight of his mistakes and the regrets that weighed him down and ate him up every day, every moment of every second of every minute of his existence. This was his life. No matter how much he tried to make the family okay, the universe seemed to punish them all.

 Lost in his thoughts, Lucifer arrived at his room. Ignoring the stack of papers in his desk and turning off his phone. Not even Diavolo was going to convince him of waking up early tomorrow. Lucifer kicked his shoes off, and without getting anything else off, he laid in bed, starring at the ceiling and wondering how could he be such a bad father and older brother.

 Across the hallway, stood two demons and a human. Whom felt as hopeless as Lucifer. Mc wanted so badly to go after Lucifer and hug him but the first they needed to cry their feelings for a second. Mc got up from the bed, leaving and empty cup on Asmodeous bed and excused themselves. Mammon sighed, passing a hand through his hair. This was all wrong, none of this should be happening, and Mammon wanted to do something about it so badly.

 “Mammon.” Asmodeous voice was hoarse and weak. Mammon ignored the feeling of tears accumulating in his eyes in order to pay attention to Asmodeous, who’s hair was covering his facial features while the younger demon starred at the floor.

 “I know.” Mammon’s tone mirrored Asmodeous. “Me too Asmo, you and all the other bunch of idiots that live in this house.” Asmodeous laughed for less than a second, looking up, and in that moment, Mammon saw that he had been crying. Mammon moved to give his little brother a hug. They stayed like that for a while, Mammon trying to regain composure while Asmodeous fully sobbed on his older brother’s shoulder.

 It was moments like this that showed them how much they did care for one another. Even if they were always fighting, and screaming at one another, they were a family. Lucifer had made sure they stood together for so long and hell would be damned if the mere presence of their father was going to change that fact. They were a family, and nothing was going to change that.

 After a few minutes, Mammon left Asmodeous alone, both agreeing to never speak of that again. For their sakes and Lucifer’s. After entering his room, Mammon put his hands over his pool table, taking in everything that had just happened. He wasn’t aware of how long he stood there, starring at nowhere while simultaneously lost in his head. The only reason he snapped out of it was because his phone started ringing.

 “What do ya want?” Mammon asked, not bothering to even check who was calling.

 “Mammon! Right?” Mammon hummed as an answer. “We finally got a hold of you. Listen kid, the customer is still requesting your presence. They want it to be delivered tonight. You in?” Mammon sighed; he was not having any of it tonight.

 “Yeah, listen here bud. Tell the costumer The Great Mammon isn’t interest in delivering no food.” He didn’t even wait for an answer before hanging up and throwing his phone over the bed, flopping in it and trying to fall asleep. Of course, that was interrupted by the phone once again. Mammon groaned. “Oi! I already told you I am not interested. Stop calling.”

 “We understand, but the customer stated that in case you refused to deliver we reassured you that he would pay very handsomely.” Mammon sighed.

 “How about this, why don’t ya take the order to the man, and you receive the pay, that way you can use that money to check yo damn ears cuz you ain’t listening to what I’m saying. I Ain’t Interested.” With that Mammon hanged up again, he got up from the bed and tried to sigh, but before he even did that the phone started ringing again. “Y’know what? I’m starting to get real mad-”

 “Mammon.” That voice… “come now, no need to be so rude.” This time, the voice that came through the phone wasn’t the same. For a moment he couldn’t quite recognize the voice, then in clicked. “I only wish to see my son. Why are you denying me from that?” It was his father.

 “You…you were the customer.” Mammon spoke in mild disbelief. He had been so tired and annoyed he didn’t even think of the possibility of his father messing with him. Yet, here he was. Even from the phone Mammon could tell his father had the most devilish grin the man could give. For a moment Mammon felt his head spin while the anticipation of hearing his father’s voice grew. Then, in a deep playful tone, almost gritted yet obviously unwelcome, his father spoke.

 “Bingo.”

Aight! Chapter seven people! This one is bit different than the normal format of “God finds a brother alone and manipulates him.” In all honestly, this chapter was not meant to exist at all, i started it trying to write the chapter for the next brother but it turned into this. I still hope y’all like this one. Next chapter will be again fallow my usual format, and I’ll probably post it Wednesday. That is all for today, hope y’all had enjoyed it sweeties :3

Chapter one

Chapter two

Chapter three

Chapter four

Chapter five

Chapter six

Chapter eight

Chapter nine

Chapter ten

Chapter eleven

Chapter twelve

Chapter thirteen

[asterekmess]

S3A - E3

Hiya, back with another episode of the rewatch. I am...not looking forward to this episode. *deep breath* here we go.

Read More’s save sanity

Hey, so I know this is a really heavy first bullet point...but isn’t anybody else uncomfortable with the image of a black boy running around out of his mind with fury and bloodlust and going after little...white kids? Am I reading too much into this? I know Cora’s running around too. I just...whatever, I’m just gonna keep my mouth shut.

Straight from way too heavy to way too light. So that girl dropped a big jar of fireflies, but they say that fireflies that actually glow aren’t native to California, which would mean these are part of the whole magic thing going on, and at the end of the whole firefly thing they get rid of all the fireflies. So...what if someone finds that jar and opens it?

...nevermind the jar opened up somehow...

Okay, listen, I have a petty and biased hatred for this moment with Scott. Like...is it so hard to say, “I had to get the kids he was chasing away from him?” It’s not like they don’t have time..they just stand there in silence for a while. I also hate the savior pose he strikes there with the kids clinging to him. Like, I get that it’s a very common trope. I still hate it. I use the anti-scott tag for a reason, let me be salty.

why te fuck does Scott FLOAT in the intro?

Lydia has seriously emptied an entire bottle of ibuprofen? She should be dead. Or at least at a hospital. She’s too smart not to know how dangerous it is to take ibuprofen (even the recommended dosage) for too long at a time.

Lydia...Lydia knows about werewolves now. Did no one tell her about this whole escape plan for the betas? She could’ve helped.

Cue the shitty SFX running. Y’all look ridiculous.

Man, come on. Are you seriously telling me that Derek never played hide and seek with his siblings? Like, they’re werewolves for fuck’s sake. Derek never did fake chases through the woods? He tracked PETER for christ’s sake, all the way across town. He was like yards behind him before he got shot that one time.

This show relies a lot on character’s losing time and just finding themselves places. Jackson losing time, Lydia losing time. Lydia losing time again, but in a new way. Later, it’ll be Stiles losing time. I’m just saying, it happens a lot.

It’s fucking august in California. Does it actually get that cold? Poor Lydia’s nose is always red cus she gets forced to wander around in the dark and freezing. I can see her goosebumps when she kneels next to the pool.

I know it’s gotta be hell on her voice, but I think it’s so interesting the way Lydia screams and how it has to jump around the chords before hitting that one note. I don’t know why I find that so interesting. Guess it just reminds me of a wolf howl. Seriously, look ‘em up. Weirdly similar. GO  Holland!

What do you mean the last memory that she had of her mother, Scott? You should’ve told her RIGHT THEN. Right off the bat. There was TONS of time between her getting bit and when she died. You should’ve told Allison right away. Fuck you, you had all of spring break!

god fucking damn it now I’m crying again. Erica, sweetie...Derek honey...

I’m trying to get past the tears to enjoy this romancey stuff, with the candles and the lil lamps, and the LOTR references. I’m really trying.

This is totally not what I should be thinking about while watching the two of them make out, but like, so does Caitlin not go to their school? She just sort of appears a couple times, but Stiles doesn’t seem to know her. Maybe she went to the same school as Heather?

don’t like bugs don’t like bugs ew ew ew ew

Hi cora!

Isaac! You’re somehow feeling better, even though you were apparently out of commission like an hour or two ago...wait huh?

I gotta say, okay, listen I just can’t help it. I know this is serious, but that lil smirk on Isaac’s face? I don’t think he looks smug, personally, I think he looks like he’s about to go play, go rolling around in the grass and leaves, playing with a pack member. He’s been alone for so long this summer, what with Jackson leaving. he’s had no wolves to play with (cus’ we know Derek’s a grump). As worried as he’s gotta be, I bet he’s having funnnnnn.

I..uh..Cora what sound is coming out of your mouth? That..that does not sound like a wolf. That sounds like a wild cat of some kind. Wolves don’t make that screechy noise. They bark and growl, like the sound that came just before. That doesn’t even sound like a roar. Who gave you cheetah sounds?? You’re canine, not feline. Come on they did SO WELL with Derek’s sounds-- No. NO Do not tell me they gave Cora cat sounds cus she’s a chick. I’m gonna fight someone. (For those of you interested, if you scroll to the bottom of this webpage, you can listen to wolf growl snippets and they’re such good quality (I think the bark snippet is broken tho). Listen to those whimpers and whines too, fucking fascinating. I love wolves. Such beautiful animals.)

Cora with Isaac and Scott attacking her and growling at her: “Fuck you, I’ll bite you!” Cora with Derek just growling at her: “BYE bro!”

Stiles, honey! I missed you! Literally, just the sound of your voice makes me feel better.

Scott, Seriously, Derek just said you haven’t tracked either of them anywhere near the pool. You’ve both been following them all night! Yeah, they’re dangerous, but they couldn’t get to the pool and back in time to fight you! I”M GONNA SMACK YOU. DOn’t use that fucking patronizing tone of voice when Derek is TELLING YOU FACTS.

OUR fault? OUR FAULT? I’m gonna fucking *kicks a chair and storms off, grumbling* *Spins around, cus fuck it i’m gonna yell. it’s my post.* NONE OF THIS is DEREK”S FAULT. NOne of this is ISAAC’S FAULT. Fuck dude, I’ll even say that it’s not Scott’s fault! If it’s anyone other than the Alphas’ fault, it’s Allison’s, but tbf she thought she was helping.

DEREK SHUT YOUR PRETTY MOUTH. I swear to god.

ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING? DEREK WOULD NEVER SUGGEST MURDERING BOYD AND CORA. NEVER. He thought Cora was fucking dead and he just found out she’s alive! HE WOULD NEVER. NEVER. FUCK YOU. FUCK EVERYTHING. *Throws a plate* YOU KNOW YOU ONLY FUCKING WROTE IT SO THAT YOU COULD SHOW OFF SCOOT MCFUCKFACE’S SUDDEN FLIP IN MORALITY BY HAVING HIM SAY THAT “KILLING ISN’T THE RIGHT THING TO DO” OH REALLY Scott? REALLY? Killing is bad? YOU DIDN’T THINK SO WHEN YOU SPENT MONTHS attempting to commit PREMEDITATED MURDER of a GUY WHO WAS ALREADY DYING. MONTHS. Scott. FUCK YOU. FUCK THIS SHOW. 13 minutes in and I’m already about to chuck my laptop across the room. MY CAT WON’T EVEN CUDDLE ME ANYMORE I’M SO ANGRY.

And now I’m really fucking sad, cus’ I hate watching this poor girl get told she’s just hallucinating.

WHY does everyone go shopping at fucking 8 pm in Beacon Hills? What...Chris you don’t even have a day job.

I don’t...I don’t understand this scene with Isaac. Like..what exactly are they trying to imply? That he thinks she’s hot? All he’s seen is her raging around with fangs free and glowing eyes. And yeah, some people definitely think that’s hot. But like...that’s just so...what? I choose to read this scene as him just wondering about Derek’s home life. Like, “Since when do you have siblings? Why don’t you tell me these things? I have an aunt?”

WHAT DO YOU mean “Your world?” CHRIS YOU GREW UP AS A HUNTER. THIS IS YOUR WORLD TOO. He was YOUR dad. You’ve been a part of this WAY longer than Scott! Don’t blame the werewolves for ruining your life! THAT WAS YOUR DAD and YOUR STUPID HUNTER CODE’S FAULT.

OKay, listen, I have so many issues with this I need a therapist to mediate my conversations with it. FUCK YOU TW for bringing in Chris. I dont’ give a fuck if he’s experienced or trying to redeem himself. He is a HUNTER he has Slaughtered Derek’s kind for his entire life. He may want to do the right thing, but the right thing definitely doesn’t involved him Standing in front of Derek and forcing him to listen to hunter PROPAGANDA BULLSHIT. I’M SO FUCKING MAD. This was so inappropriate, holy shit. SO far beyond okay. Even the CONCEPT that werewolves wouldn’t be as good at tracking other werewolves as hunters are is fucking stupid. You said it yourself, Chris they can follow scent up to TWO MILES AWAY. Wolves can track their prey for weeks without losing the scent. Just because Isaac stepped on some footprints doesn’t mean he’s incapable of finding them. And what’s all this shit about them “Being able to rely on their human half”? NO? First off, minor detail. Werewolves aren’t half wolf, half human, dumbass. They’re all werewolf. AND The show has said like Ten TIMES that they can’t access their human form/the thought processes they would normally have during a full moon without an anchor, and Boyd and Cora are effectively anchorless on this moon. This is just utter bullshit and I’m so goddamn angry I don’t even know how to process it. “If you’re not trained like me you have no idea this print is Boyd’s” YEAH THEY DO. THEY CAN LITERALLY SMELL IT.  DEREK ALREADY IDENTIFIED THE TRACKS. FUCK you.

ALSO. Getting REAL SICk of people slicing their wrists every time they need a little blood for a ritual or for bait. YOU CUT THE MEAT of the arm. ON THE BACK. WHERE YOU WON”T HIT a VEIN. DUMBASSES.

WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK DO YOU MEAN NINE YEARS DEREK? YOU’D BETTER MEAN CORA WAS NINE YEARS OLD, CUS’ THE FIRE WAS SIX YEARS AGO. and what do you mean you don’t have a lock on her scent? you’ve been following it just fine all night! Wolves remember human scents decades later.

Booooo, i hate the entire concept of wolves going mad on a full moon. It’s lazy and boring. Wolves are not vicious animals, they’re shy as fuck. THey don’t attack without reason. Werewolves should be the same. Full moon’s enhance their wolfishness, so it should make them MORE SHY. The moon should enhance whatever they feel, rather than just making them mindlessly aggressive.

“Primal apex Predatory satisfaction”? seriously? Shut the FUCK up Chris, I’m really fucking sick of your hunter bedtime stories.

....i hate this woman.

Casual reminder that Isaac wouldn’t suggest Killing boyd. Ever. I fucking hate these writers.

yeah yeah, running scene. blah blah blah.

See, I never really understood those fics where Peter just refuses to give anyone any info. He tells Derek what’s up constantly. He didn’t lie or hold anything back when he helped Derek figure out what was up with Jackson or how Jackson needed Lydia to be cured. He walks right up to Derek and says “Hey, so those Alphas clearly want you to join them and that means they’re trying to make you kill your own pack” Peter helps Derek all the time. He’s just a dick while he does it.

Look, I love this moment with Peter, his “Let Scott be the hero of his morally black and white world. You and I, we live in shades of gray” lines are so good, and they speak so much to his character and personality. And he’s right. But I hate that they built the scene around Derek planning to kill his own pack, and following Scott around doing as he asks. I just hate what they do to Derek here.

The dog whistles suddenly have no effect on their hearing? Love it.

Take a second to bring up a plotline you won’t explain for ages. I vibe with that, so long as it is eventually explained.

OOh, suddenly BHHS has a football field?

Not gonna cry, not gonna cry. FUCK I’m crying again.

I just...dude I’m over here trying not to completely lose my shit and cry like a baby, and Stiles is in the middle of panicking and losing his oldest friend and he still puts the dots together. Like. Jesus christ this boy.

NOW Derek? You choose NOW to take Every Single Step down the stairs? JUMP.

...what is this a cartoon? Glowing eyes in the dark? one too many sets? Yeah, yeah, I get it, they’re supposed to look like fireflies.

Why did you stop to look at each other after blasting them? Just go.

OH, yeah, of course Scott has to be the one to hear the extra heartbeat. Scott. Not Derek. Not the ALpha who’s senses are heightened above the a Beta’s. Not DEREK the ALPHA who has a PACK, which makes his senses even stronger that that. No. Scott. The omega. Because he’s like an inch closer to the door. Yah. Sure. That makes sense. SUre.

Dude I wish my high school had that much backup supplies free for the teacher’s to grab. Also, I hate this woman.

WHy were the lights off in the boiler room if she was in the back grabbing stuff? That..what?

OH. I forgot, so Caitlin’s out of high school? She’s...what, 18? 19? Okay, fine, I’ll take that.

Oh stop faking Jennifer, fuck you.

Crying again. dont’ mind me. This is Derek. Not choosing to kill his beta or his long lost sister. Choosing to die himself instead. THAT is Derek (it’s self-sacrificing and it’s because he gives his own life no worth, but it’s still him.)

HOW IS IT DAWN? THAT WOULD BE like 6 HOURS of standing around! Or did the sun not set until like 10 pm? Hm? This show has no concept of time, and werewolves are very time oriented. Someone take away the show from the writers. They’ve lost their privileges.

I hate this. I hate that Isaac shouts for Scott. Not Derek. That’s just so fucking dumb. I’m so tired of it. I’m just so fucking sick of it.

I don’t even wanna look at this. I hate this woman so much.

YOU REALIZE that the third Virgin was Taken. The third virgin is DEAD. the sacrifices have been made, and now Jennifer has control over people. This is where she starts controlling Derek. Right Fucking Here. He loses his agency the moment they touch, if not the moment they make eye contact or he gets in range. I hate it. I HATE IT.

BOOM. Episode three, and Stiles already has the villain after next figured out. He’s past the Alphas now. 

Final Thoughts: I’m angry, I’m tired, and I honestly got very little joy or interest out of this whole episode. I hate what this show did to werewolves and how much insane Scott glorification there is and how every little thing HAS to be about Scott. Scott’s relationship with Chris. Scott saving the kids. Scott’s the one Isaac calls for. Scott’s the one who hears the heartbeats. I get that he’s the main character. I also hate that he’s the main character. It’s just so sad and pathetic and boring and just....ugh. I’m going to bed. I will try for another episode or two tomorrow.

(I promise I’m okay. Just go listen to the wolf howls for me in that link, huh? Listen to those beauties and imagine how amazing a wolf show could have been.)

[gukptune]

— user: 95mochibuns, 2 (m.)

↛ jimin x reader

everyday you sit on the same overly expensive gaming chair and play games on stream, with the occasional trip to the bathroom, eating and well, watching your favourite camboy’s streams. never in a million years did you think you’d be chatting up your biggest crush, neither did you imagine he’d figure you out so easily

↛ genre: camboy!au, streamer!reader, smut

↛ warnings: explicit language, masturbation, phone sex, public sex, use of a sex toy, rough, spanking, thigh fucking (inspired by one of my other upcoming fics), oral (cunnilingus), etc.

↛ words: 5k+

↛ note: part 2 and end of mochibuns! hope you’ll enjoy and thank you for the patience for this part.

Hey. It was that hey that had your head ravelled up in a twist. How were you meant to respond to your ultimate crush and the guy who’s made your life so hard for the past few months or so, fuck. You didn’t know how to respond, so you didn’t.

You went through your day as if nothing had bothered you, well you tried. Constantly feeling an itch on the back of your head reminding you of something you weren’t confident enough to do, gosh, what were you so scared of. You finished your day at University like usual and made your way home with a fresh new game to stream.

Even though, it wasn’t your usual stream day you had to race against time, you didn’t want to see any possible spoilers or anything at all about the game. You wanted to experience it first and hoped that your fans would appreciate your enthusiasm for the game.

As you settled yourself down with a change of clothing for comfort your eyes glanced at the phone on your desk, at least if you responded now you had no time to be embarrassed or overthink you needed to stream.

Taking a deep breath you managed to respond with something quite lacklustre.

you: hey :) [21:23]

You rubbed your face with your palm, cursing at how lame that was. But you had to move on from it. Jumping on a surprise livestream as your fans joined in with speed.

“Hello, everyone, welcome welcome! I hope you’re all excited and happy about this surprise stream as you know I’ve been waiting for this moment since my childhood and finally it is here! It’s here early!” You exclaimed, clapping your hands still not revealing the surprise to your fans as they commented questions and responses.

With a large smile you continued, “Finally! I have in my hands the long awaited Resident Evil 2! Thank you so much to Capcom for sending me the game before many and allowing me to show the first part to you guys. Resident Evil 2 comes out tomorrow on all platforms so get your copy to play along with me.”

myherotodoroki: so excited!

ghoulingtokyo: holy shit you got early access! yesss!

joker_r: let’s all be prepared to cry in fear

“I’m honestly terrified but I have you all to carry me,” You laughed, knowing that you were definitely going to take your entire life to get through this damned game. 

Reading the ever so flooding comments you couldn’t help but hear the constant buzzing of your phone through your headphones as nothing was playing through it but the title screen with low music.

You were hoping your followers wouldn’t notice it as you tried to ignore it, it must’ve been him it couldn’t be anyone else. You weren’t particular texting people all the time and well, most of your notifications were turned off.

You continued into the game as you interacted with your audience, seeing the rolling comments helping you through the game and praising you through tough moments. Any time a zombie would show up your heart would explode and well, everyone seemed to like it.

Then surprisingly a donation came through, which you forgot to turn off, your audience doesn’t donate as you’ve told them many times before you didn’t need them but you’d get the occasional newbie or weirdo who’d donate so you’d read their comment.

MOCHI has donated $50

mochi: Why don’t you answer my texts...? :’(((((

Your eyes nearly bulge out of your head, you might’ve stuttered a little, the concerned comments of your audience had you worried that they might’ve thought it was something bad.

“It’s alright guys, just a friend I was playing hard to get with,” You eased the tension in the chat box. Eyeing that damned comment as it went away slowly. 

As you ventured on you knew you’d have to answer him before he freaks everyone out again, you excused yourself for a second to go to the bathroom as you swiped your phone along with you nonchalantly. 

You pulled the toilet cover down as you sat on it, looking at the few texts that Jimin had sent, immediately making you open it and read it.

jimin: Finally, i’ve been waiting! [21:23]

jimin: I see that you’re quite busy though. :( [21:24]

jimin: Am I not worth your time? [21:24]

jimin: I’m just kidding, that’s cheesy. [21:24]

You rolled your eyes at his visible clinginess that you never knew that he’d be for you.

you: you freaked everyone out you jerk. [21:48]

As if immediately like he was awaiting your response.

jimin: I’m sorrrryyy, I just wanted to talk to you. [21:49]

Gosh, he was cute. It was surely him, you had checked if it was him. His twitter was indeed himself with many followers and pictures of him. You just couldn’t believe it.

you: and it had to be right now? [21:49]

jimin: Wellll, I texted you last night! [21:50]

Right, he did. And you didn’t respond.

jimin: I want to call you. [21:53]

Fuck. You couldn’t say no to that, it was Park Jimin for fucks sake. You eased up and sent your phone number to him casually. He had seen it and seemed to be calling you. With a blink of an eye a random number was calling, must’ve been him.

You answered, hearing not much but heavy breathing.

“Hello?” You said, hoping for at least some sort of sign that he was at least a live and is himself.

You could hear a bit of a tussle before a response, “Oh, shit, hey, hello.”

His chuckle running through your ears, you felt as if you were watching his lives instead of actually talking to him. With that you could hear a tinge of his accent, “I’m so sorry, I forgot that I was the one that called.”

“How are you?” he adds quickly, his voice wavering.

“I’m alright, I was streaming until you know...” You teased.

You could hear him huff, “Ops, I guess. Aren’t you in the bathroom? Peeing?”

“Nope, I might’ve lied, didn’t want you to freak people out even more. They literally thought you were some stalker, Jimin!” You laughed, explaining to him the situation hoping he’d not do it again.

He lets out a groan for some odd reason, “Uh, could you say my name again, please?”

You didn’t see why not so you did, “Jimin?”

That’s when he lets out a rather strangled moan, fuck, was he really?

“_____, you wouldn’t have happened to notice how we’re so effortlessly casual with eachother? As if we know eachother?”

You swallowed, not really following in what he was saying, “Uhm, I’m not sure what you mean, I assume you know me since you do follow me— sorry for not noticing it before.”

Of course you had fucking noticed that he followed you.

He let’s out a chuckle, a breathy one, “Yes, I do watch your streams but you seem to be very friendly to me, even though you seemingly don’t know me, you surely don’t follow me, I’m just a stranger, right?”

His voice lingering in your ears as you tried to process what was actually going on. You must’ve taken your time as he spoke before you could.

“I do keep track of the members on my account, I check their profiles every now and then, I think you should change your email— the one on your twitter strangely matches that of one, peachbubbles.”

Oh for fucks sake. You were dead, ruined, you can’t come back from his. Maybe your silence fed into his victory, he’s exposed you pretty much, was this his true intention. Why were you stupid enough to use your own email.

“Don’t worry about it, only I can see the email, love,” He hisses as the end as if he was in pain.

Making you wonder, “Hey—are, are you in pain or are you...”

He lets out a laugh, an octave lower than his usual tone.

“You’ve figured me out again, I was wondering how long it would take it.” He reveals without a care in the world.

You nearly scream, but kept it in knowing your stream was still running, “What the fuck, how are you so shameless?”

“Oh come on, I know you’re damn kinky, _____, if you don’t remember I occasionally jack off to your pretty face and you just so happened to bless me with a surprise stream where I could see your pretty plump red lips scream, in fear but I pretend it’s for me.”

He was good, he knew what to do to make a girl squirm. God, you were squirming in your seat already, he made it hard, so hard. You were dripping, you could feel the wetness below you sinking into your sweatpants.

You needed to go now.

“Look, Jimin, I have to go,” You rubbed your head in frustration, “I have people waiting.”

Jimin whines audibly, “Wait, please. We could—”

“I really want to, god I do, but they’ll get suspicious. My fans are nosey... also I promised someone to play tonight—”

“Urh, who’d you promise, one of your guy friends, god, if you stream that shit I’ll get so fucking jealous,” He groans, you could hear the slapping of skin through the speakers he was going at it hard.

“Maybe it is, maybe I’ll stream it. I’m sure you could get yourself off just watching my pretty lips right, I’ll talk to you later.” You ended the call before he could respond, you could practically here the phantom of his own frustrations.

You tried to get your mind off the imagery of him jacking off, reminding you of last night and his glorious dick, you actually talked to him. Him. You weren’t about to fangirl over a damn camboy but you fucking are.

You woke up without a care in the world, stretching over your pillows, cozying into your fluffy sheets. Pretty much letting out moans at how comfortable you feel. Then of course, getting a sinking feeling knowing that you had to get up to University soon. It was always the worst part, getting up, after that everything was simple and easy.

That’s when you notice the message on your phone screen, blinking back at you.

jiminie: Where do you happen to live again? [8:12]

You blinked for a second wondering why he would ask that. You then proceeded to write back the city you currently study in, he seemed to be taking a while to respond after reading it.

jiminie: Well, isn’t it a coincidence that I happen to be here? :0 [8:15]

You froze for a second, he was here. As in breathing the same air as you right now. The question that stayed on your mind was why he was here, he lived in Seoul.

you: 0.0 [8:16]

jiminie: I happen to have been invited to a birthday party, of a friend. I mostly agreed knowing I’d be able to see you. [8:17]

jiminie: Surprise? [8:17]

It hadn’t been the longest time you two had texted back and forth, it was difficult with the time differences but both of you seemed to like staying up late in the night. He tuned into your streams as you did his as usual. Maybe making you feel a sense of pride knowing that every time someone would ask him how it was between you he’d pretend nothing had happened and play it off. Reading all those comments of girls wanting him, yet here he was completely and only focused on you.

He would even mouth your name as he came every now and then, as cheesy as it was winking to the camera knowing that you would be the only one to be able to catch that.

Maybe it made you wonder if he had anyone else, it would be strange to think that he wouldn’t have had anyone else. He didn’t seem like that type of guy but he must’ve had someone before right... or you had too much faith in him.

You guys hadn’t called or video chatted the same way that night nearly went, it was strange, he was only asking you about you. Maybe he did like you and want to know you.

In the end both of you were interested in each other first and for-most for each other’s looks, what you saw online.

you: i have uni :( [8:22]

jiminie: I can meet you after, I’ll pick you up? [8:23]

You wondered if that would be a good idea, after all you would get off super late.

you: uhm [8:27]

jiminie: Do you not like the idea? I could always wait elsewhere? [8:27]

you: it’s not that [8:28]

you: i have practice, it ends pretty late in the evening :[ [8:28]

jiminie: What kind of practice? [8:29]

you: volleyball [8:29]

jiminie: 0.0 [8:32]

jiminie: Really? [8:32]

you: yea... [8:32]

jiminie: Shit, that’s kinda hot. Am I allowed to watch? [8:34]

you: omg. and i think so? there’s no rules against it and we get parents around sometimes [8:35]

jiminie: Fuck, I honestly thought you just didn’t want to see me. And, now I get to see you in tight little booty shorts, am I dreaming? [8:35]

you: of course i want to see you loser! [8:37]

you: dreaming? thought you stopped being cheesy. [8:37]

jiminie: Never baby. [8:39]

jiminie: Get to school, loser. I’ll see you after! <3 [8:39]

At least he gave you some sort of motivation to get the day over with. You still couldn’t believe it, or believe him. Were you really going to see him, was he honestly even real. You won’t even believe it until you could see him with your own eyes.

Beads of sweat dripped down your chin as you leaned over on your knees trying to catch your breath. Eyes shut from the world as you tried to lower your heart rate. You of course were running laps around the court because your teammate couldn’t stop a spike, it was brutal.

Even if your spikers were some of the best in the country the blockers needed to be better or at least good enough to catch up. As a team you needed to take the punishments together and well you all hated laps and that’s what you had to do.

As you finished first you could hear your teammate chanting her apology comedically as she ran, maybe you laugh, though choking in pain as well from catching your breath.

You went over to the bench and pulled your shorts out from being completely attached to your bottom. Picking up your water bottle, you looked around at the spectators but nothing.

No sign of him.

Maybe he lied, you rolled your eyes thinking that you’ve just hoped for the best and go the worst which wasn’t something that happened often. You were taught to hope for the best but prepare for the worst, and you were prepared. Prepared to just walk your ass home after practice.

With that and a call out from your coach you jogged over to join the team as you finally began to actually play versus. Your team only had the best and weren’t so plentiful so you were to practice with the boys team which in all honestly was not as good as you. They are bigger, hit harder but that made your team extremely resilient and able to take physically larger opponents but well you can’t say much for their skills.

When practice ended you were still picking up the rest of the equipment with it being only you and a few of the boys left. Most of the girls had ran into the locker rooms and showered, leaving as quickly as they can to do what they needed after.

You took your time, knowing that you weren’t in need of rushing for anything or well anyone. You’ve put away all you could and grabbed your duffle bag including the rest of your things and headed into the locker room.

Humming a tune you looked around seeing no one in sigh, plopping your bag down on the ground you opened your locker and pulled out your school bag and extra clothes to change into. 

You had thought no one else was here but you could hear rather loud cracking steps, turning around with your hands still fumbling through the locker you saw no one. Thinking it was someone rummaging through their locker on the other side.

You pushed the thoughts away as you finished up, shutting your locker until you left a strange presence. That strange presence of something behind you.

“You are truly good at hiding that ass in those sweats.”

You screamed before turning around, throwing your handful of clothes towards the voice. Having all of that just fall into the person’s hand as he caught it.

Jimin’s eyes widened before realising how scary it must’ve been, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

His smile nearly blinds you as you stare back at him blankly completely still no knowing how to react to him being in here.

“I—uh, had to sneak in, I assumed your school doesn’t let guys into the girl’s locker room,” He smiled again, handing your the clothes as he hopped over the bench in between the two of you.

You took the clothes back, hugging them close to you, replying breathlessly, “I thought you ditched me.”

“I would never. Traffic’s a mess here.” His hand coming up to brush your hair off your face as you closed your eyes to feel his palm falling against the shell of your ear.

Opening them to see that he’s stepped much closer to you now, feeling his breath on your face.

“Why did it sound like you were wearing heels?” You teased, looking down at his choice of footwear.

He lifted his heel up to show you his shoes as he brushes fingers through his hair, “I guess they’re kind of heels.”

“You’re lucky you didn’t slip in here with those shoes.”

Jimin’s hand fell towards the base of your neck and his other hand made it’s way up your waist, “I’m lucky haven’t been caught getting in here with these clicky heels.”

“That is true, you’re lucky to have bypassed the boys team lurking around,” You smiled, feeling his hand squeeze at your side pulling you to him.

Finally, taking a fully look at him. He didn’t sport his coloured contacts, neither is his hair a light blonde, more of a light brown now. He looked even better in person and well, if you get to it he’s dressed so effortlessly well enough to make you crawl on your knees.

He must’ve noticed your silence and wandering eyes. Taking his bottom lip in between his teeth the man let his hand slide down towards his most anticipated attraction.

Taking a rather mighty squeeze at it, making you let out a breathy gasp right at his cheeks as he pulls you up.

His lips now skimming over your ear, “You make it so hard, you’re making me so fucking hard.”

If anytime was the time now was it. You placed your lips against his cheek, letting it attach and pull away with a pop, “Oh yea? Why don’t you show me.”

He lets out an audible breath of amusement as turns you around and pushes you down onto the spacious bench. Keeping himself stood tall, “I knew you were kinky as soon as I laid eyes on your Devil May Cry walkthrough, baby, watching me all those times before we talked too.”

“My dirty girl,” He bites his lips as he groans, his thumb playing with your bottom lip as he undoes his belt skill-fully with one hand. Allowing your excitement to brew as you squeezed your thighs together, arching your back with your head looking up at him.

Moaning into his thumb as he pushes it through your lips, letting your tongue play with it as your eyes batted at him lustfully.

As soon as he let his erection out of it’s tight holding you were shocked to see now strained the thing looked. He must’ve been holding it in for the longest time, “Painfully hard it seems, huh?”

Gracing your fingers against it, he shudders as he watches you ingulf his thumb, as if it was his cock you went hard. He could practically be drooling at the sight infront of him, “Like I said, teeny tight booty shorts on that juicy ass.”

He choked on a moan as soon as your hand took him, he was relatively large, thick more than anything. Wet and hot, enough to make you want to take him already, it would just fit so perfectly.

As soon as you began to pump back and forth on him you seemed to get stuck on the way to his pelvis, his long shirt covering the top part from your eyes. With that he takes his hand away from you, with a lewd pop he grins at the string of spit dragging between them.

He pulls up his shirt to show you what had been in the way, of course it was a cockring.

“Thought you’d like it, baby.”

You did, the tight band holding his cock making it enlarge in size by the mere pressure. You could see the small bullet on the top part of it, god, that would feel so good.

“I want you so bad,” You whined, pulling at his top and running your hand underneath it to feel his ripped body underneath.

He hummed in return looking around as if unsure of the choice of location, “I don’t know, baby, I’ve never done it in public before, are you sure about this. I won’t be able to stop if you let me.”

As much as he was a self titled porn star, the boy only appeared to his fans by himself, never had he had a girl with him. Yet, here you were about to let a camboy fuck you against a bench in your team’s locker room, what had you become.

“Please, Jimin.”

As if animalistic-ally, he groans pushing you back into the bench allowing you to lay against the grooved surface. He pulls his shirt over his head with one motion and continues to pull his pants down over his thighs, giving you a full sight of all his glory. As he if was allowing you a moment to take it in, the boy’s abs flexing as he breathed, his unshaven navel dragging your eyes to his jewels.

You furrowed your eyebrows with a pout as if rushing him, making him sniffle a chuckle as he kneels over on the relatively spacious bench by your legs, pulling them apart to see your shorts drenched from your own juices.

“Baby’s all wet for me, huh? Fuck, I can’t wait to fuck your insides out,” He growls, reminding you much of his teasing when he’d do his livestreams. Your core clenching against itself, wanting some sense of friction with his holding your thighs back.

His hands made quick work of the tight shorts, grabbing them by the elastic on your waist he pulls them down along with your panties leaving you bare from the bottom and sporting only your long sleeve uniform top.

Instantly the man slid his finger down your slit, making your breath hitch as your body reacted to the long awaited touch. Your hips thrusting up at him wanting more, he listened and bites his lip dragging his fingers down towards your clenching hole not getting a touch on your clit.

“Uh—ah,” You moaned as soon as his fingers began teasing your leaking self, your lips parted letting out heavy breaths constantly. Trying your best to keep your eyes on the sight with your elbows holding you up.

Without a warning he plunges into you, two fingers dragging in and out of you with a curve, giving you only sensations of pleasure. You were fucking wet and he couldn’t wait to taste that.

Jimin pulled you up by the back of your thighs to hoist your bottom into his lap, feeling his large erection pressing against your ass as his tongue flattens against you nearly making you scream from simulation or the lack of simulation on your clit now having a full on twist and twirl on it.

He sucked and ate you out like he was starved, his fingers deep inside of your as he curls his fingers at the right spots, allowing your first high to come, “Fuck, come for me baby, I want you to drench me.”

And that you did, as you came down you wanted to feel him, rushing to place your hand over his shoulders as for the first time you two had your lips against eachother. You could still taste yourself against his tongue, but it didn’t matter, it was dirty, hot and wet. Your lips moving against eachother like no tomorrow, Jimin letting out grunts past his lips as you felt his cock twitch against you.

“Fuck me, Jimin,” You mumbled against his lips, he curses with a smirk on his face and pushes you down with his weight. Leaning over you he runs his lips against your neck, nipping and biting at the skin that he could before his hands push your top up over your chest.

He grunts from the sight of your breasts and immediately pulls the bra up over to free them, fucking them with his tongue as his hand played with himself. Pulling at his balls as he wetted himself with your cum.

Jimin hisses as his lips came back up and brushed against the side of your ear, “I can’t let you have me that easily baby, you should know, I fucking love teasing.”

Of course he did, you whined as you smacked him against his biceps knowing that you were hoping for it too much.

He picks up your legs and held them together as he lifted them to place them over his right hip, “We’re going to play a little more.”

He puts one of his knees up on the bench from what you could see as his other leg braces him against the ground, pulling his pants lower down his thighs to show you how nice they were, fuck, they were thick.

He takes a hold of your hands that were holding onto him and pushes them over your head, “Keep ‘em up or I won’t fuck you, alright.”

Dominant Jimin was the best kind of Jimin when he was horny, shit, his eyes were dark and his goal was to make you and himself feel good. You nod gripping onto the end of the bench with your arms up over your head.

Something you’ve never experienced began, he slipped his cock through your thigh brushing it against your lips. You rolled your head back at the strange new sensation of having his cock head slipping back and forth between your thigh and running against your clit so hard.

“Never done this before?” He grunts, thrusting back and forth as you watch his tip leaking precum.

You shook your head, your eyes nearly rolling to the back of your head from the precise clit stimulation, “No-fuck, I feels so good, what the fuck.”

“It’s about to feel much better.”

He takes a moment to pause before turning on his cock ring, and going right at it. The vibrating ring hitting your clit whenever he’d fuck past the hilt, you watched as his cock head appeared and disappeared every time he’d thrust.

You couldn’t keep it in anymore, you mouth speaking for itself as your stomach clenched and shook from the insane pleasure. Overstimulation at it’s best, you wanted to scream but also didn’t want to get caught. Dropping your head back as you could feel yourself clenching so hard without anything inside, never had you felt like cumming so fucking hard.

Jimin’s breathing chokes up as he nears his high too, with his cock tip pooling with cum he skillfully slips himself inside of you, the rough and fullness making tears pool out of your eyes. Jimin’s pleasure was audible now, not able to hold himself in anymore.

“Fuck, you’re so tight, this ring isn’t making things-easier, fuck.”

Spluttering as he nearly creams himself, he leans over you and begins to kiss down your neck, whispering dirty things to you, “Baby girl, you’re taking me so well, fuck- come on, come real hard for me.”

God, he had his ways with words as your body reacts on it’s own. Clenching hard against his thick cock and with the added vibrating ring you were gone. Jimin didn’t last much longer as he thrusts a last time as he bottoms out inside you letting himself fill you whole.

He awaits your breathing and pulls out, watching the cum leak as he did. He squints turning off the ring as he pulls it through his dick and drops it against the ground. Rubbing his hand up and down your thigh as your collected yourself.

Pulling your bra down as well as your top, you sat up feeling the hot cum still coming out of you. Sitting on Jimin and your own hot cum felt strange, strangely hot.

You grinned, bringing a hand up to place on his cheek as you pulled him in for a kiss, “That was way too good.”

Jimin shyly laughed, rubbing his head.

“Honestly, I think you ruined plain penetration for me.”

He shakes his head, turning to bite your hand playfully, “I could still make you cum harder with just my plain dick and some hard fucking, baby, next time I’d prefer doing this in a bedroom.”

“Same, it’s so damn humid now.”

“Think that’s our fault, the heat and the wet floor.” You both looked down at the mess you both made, you laughed wrapping your arm over his shoulder and peppering his neck with kisses.

He chuckles, wrapping his arm around your waist tightly, “You know, I’m obligated to shoot tonight.”

“Wanna give my audience a fucking lesson?”

c. 2019

[destiel-love-forever]

15x08 CODA

Read below or on AO3 HERE

“Who wants to speak first?” Rowena asks with a knowing smile, crossing her legs and tilting her head. She has a notepad and a pen. One of her men had brought it to her upon request. There’s now a coffee table in between her throne and the two chairs Castiel and Dean are in. Tea is on one coaster, whiskey on the other.

Sam has been sent off with a few of her men to look for Adam and Michael. It was never considered that Dean and Castiel would accompany him. The most likely explanation is that the two worked together on this. It’s a trap.

Dean looks out of the corner of his eye at Castiel. When Castiel’s chin jerks, Dean quickly looks away.

Castiel looks at Dean for half a second, holding his breath, before his eyes dart elsewhere.

Rowena releases a long, drawn out sigh.

It reminds Dean of Crowley, which makes him smile.

The smile disappears when Rowena fixes him with her gaze and says, “Dean, you’re the one that started this nonsense, so why don’t you go first?”

“How do you know I’m the one who started it?” Dean asks defensively, crossing his arms over his chest. He’s pretty sure he hears Castiel scoff under his breath. “What? You got somethin’ to say over there, feathers? Go ahead.”

“You know what, sure. Why not? Nothing left to lose anyway.” Castiel sits forward and looks at Rowena, putting a hand out like he’s explaining something. “You know it’s his fault because this is what Dean Winchester does. He pushes people away!”

“Oh, here we go,” Dean mutters, sitting back in his chair as he rolls his eyes.

Castiel and Rowena ignore him.

“There’s always an excuse with him! Always! It’s like one step forward, twenty steps back. It’s exhausting. I’m exhausted. And yet here I am, Rowena. Here I am. His punching bag - again. I thought I got away but nope. Here I am. Because he’s Dean. He’s - he’s Dean.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” Dean shouts. “Hell yeah I’m me. No one asked you to come back. No one wants you here!”

“You want me here, Dean! You fucking want me here! You just can’t admit it!”

Dean shakes his head and laughs. It’s a cold, cruel sound. Castiel feels it in his bones.

In the silence, Rowena does a slow clap. When she has both of their attention, she grins at Castiel and puffs up with pride. “Well, hello there, Castiel. That’s the angel I’ve heard so many legends about.”

Castiel puffs up too. He’s noticed that lately. He’s been more like his old self, but with an edge. It’s cut-throat and calculated, but not because he’s following orders and refusing to feel anything. Instead, it’s because of his emotions. Because of his humanity. Because he feels everything. And it’s exhilarating - this difference. He wishes Dean could experience it with him.

“Now Deanie boy, what do you have to say to Auntie Rowena about your lover’s concerns?”

If it bothers Dean that she calls Castiel his lover, he doesn’t show it. He just takes a sip of his whiskey and stares straight down at the glass like neither of them are even there. “I know my truth.”

“Excuse me?” Rowena asks.

“I know my truth.”

“Your truth…” Rowena looks over at Castiel, one eyebrow cocked.

The angel is fuming. “Yes, Rowena. His truth. Dean Winchester’s truth. You haven’t experienced that yet? He gets it in his head that things should go a certain way. Daddy said I shouldn’t talk about my feelings, so I won’t talk about them. Daddy said my job is to save other people, to take care of Sammy, so I’ll risk my life every fucking day because my life isn’t important. Daddy said-”

“Stop it!” Dean growls.

Castiel looks straight at him. There’s no malice in his tone. No hatred in his eyes. Just betrayal and desperation. And that’s so much worse for Dean. If he wasn’t so angry, he’d be sobbing.

“Daddy said boys are supposed to be with girls - daddy said the fags are just as bad as the monsters - daddy said ‘if I ever catch you doin’ any of that faggot shit boy I’ll kick your ass so bad you’d wish you were dead.’”

“I never should have told you that you stupid son of a-”

“Daddy said,” Castiel screams over Dean. “I can’t love a boy, so I won’t let myself be happy and in love with Cas!”

At some point, both of them had launched to their feet. They’re breathing heavily as they glare at each other without glaring at each other, because - god forbid - they look at each other yet, right? No. They’re still angry.

Always so angry.

“Now, now, my boys.” Rowena gives them both scolding looks. Castiel collapses back into his seat. Dean turns his back to them, putting his hands on his waist and hanging his head. “Castiel, why don’t you try explaining yourself a wee bit nicer, yes? Perhaps while leaving John Winchester out?”

Castiel sighs heavily. He stares at the ground for a very long time. Long enough for Dean’s anger to simmer and cool. For it to morph into a deep, empty kind of longing that clogs his throat and burns his eyes.

“I just thought we finally had it,” Castiel whispers after an eternity. “Things were calming down. Mary was back and adjusted. The three of them got to have some closure with John. Jack had solidified our family. I - I was a father. Dean and I were fathers, and we were happy, and I felt-” Castiel cuts himself off, clearing his throat a few times like he was about to start crying.

Which he was, but no one will point that out.

Surprisingly, it’s not Rowena who pushes Castiel further.

It’s Dean.

“You felt what?” he whispers, turning toward the sound of his lover’s voice. Because that’s who he is. Castiel. His lover. He always has been. Always will be.

“I felt loved.” Castiel looks away from Dean, turning so his entire face is hidden. “I was stupid. It was stupid.”

Dean’s knees weaken and he falls back in his chair.

Rowena sits forward in her throne. She waits. And waits.

And waits.

And waits.

Dean wipes a hand down his face and looks away. He grabs his whiskey and takes a long sip.

Castiel wants to drink his tea but his hands are violently shaking and he’s terrified he’ll spill.

“Oh for hell’s sake!” Rowena yells in exasperation. “The world is comin’ to an end! God - literally god - is the enemy right now. Whatever the issue is here, fix it. Look at the angel, my boy. He’s devastated.”

For the first time in… so damn long, Dean openly looks at Castiel. His breath catches at the base of his throat as he takes in the details he’s been purposely glossing over lately. It all shows in his eyes. The bags beneath them. The way they struggle to flutter back open after each blink. The dull blue that used to shine as bright as his grace. The red rims. The tears.

Dean cradles his head in his hands.

Fix it.

That's what she keeps saying. That’s what Sam said a few times too. Even Eileen once. Jody a ton of times, considering she sends almost daily texts asking if Dean’s ‘fixed it’ with Castiel yet.

Jack asks Dean in his dreams.

Mary asks Dean whenever he looks in the mirror and sees her eyes in his face.

It’s all tangled. All of his grief and joy and emptiness and hope and betrayal and depression and hopelessness and confusion and rage and terror and love. So much love, all tangled in with everything else, and Dean doesn’t know how to fix it. He doesn’t know if he even can.

Overwhelmed, Dean accidentally admits out loud, “I don’t know how. I - I don’t know if it’s fixable anymore.”

Surprisingly, Castiel speaks up. "If it's fixable, or of I'm forgivable?"

"Cas," Dean looks up at him, tears in his eyes. It feels so good to say his name again. To look at him. To speak to him. No wonder these past few weeks have been hell. He was shutting out the one person he needed the most. "There's nothing to forgive."

"But - but I failed you."

"No."

"I messed up."

"No."

"Dean, it was my fault your mom-"

"No, Cas! No. Just - no. All of that was a fucking lie. I was an idiot. I was pissed at Chuck and frustrated with Jack and then mom died and then Jack died and I just - I shoved you away." Dean leans his elbows on his knees and hangs his head. "If anyone needs to be forgiven, it's me."

The silence is suffocating.

Rowena doesn't let it last.

"Castiel?"

"Yes?" Castiel whispers, his voice thick with unshed tears.

"I think Dean needs to hear you say you forgive him."

Dean shakes his head. "No, no, he doesn't have to-"

"Of course I forgive you." When he senses someone in front of him, Dean looks up. Castiel is standing with the toes of his shoes against those of Dean's boots. He runs a gentle hand through Dean's hair and they both hum under their breath in relief. Dean's not even embarrassed when he nuzzles the palm of Castiel's hand once he cups Dean's cheek with it.

Dean looks into Castiel's eyes. They're brighter now. Dean focuses on that and breathes out his truth. His truth. No one else’s. "We are, Cas. We are."

Castiel's knees buckle and he lowers to the ground. His hands rest on Dean's knees and Dean leans forward, resting his forehead against Castiel's. He gently cups the back of the angels head and kisses him. It's soft. Tentative. Brimming with love.

When they have to break apart for Dean to breathe, their foreheads continue to stay pressed together. Castiel is nearly panting as he looks into the bright green eyes of the man he gripped tight and raised from perdition. Two daddy's boys who never believed they were worthy of love. Now here they are, so many years later. They may be in the same place, but so much has changed.

They've changed each other.

They changed together.

Castiel smiles. "I love you too, Dean."

And neither of them hear it, but Rowena walks out of the room with a smug, “And my work here is done.”

My Ko-fi

My Patreon

[musicnoots]

World’s Best Dad

Bill Guarnere/Reader

Synopsis: You wake up to find your husband putting your baby back to sleep but in a rather strange way.

Tags: @gottapenny @croatianbagudna @higgles123 @dustyjjumpwings @wexhappyxfew @medievalfangirl @bandofmarvels

You woke up in the early hours of the morning to the sound of your two month old baby crying in her nursery for the third time in six hours. When you found out that you were pregnant, you were ecstatic, crying tears of joy into the chest of your husband, but when the time did come for you birth an actual human being into existence, you questioned yourself and your capability of being a mother when you couldn’t even take care of yourself.

When you heard the cries of your baby, you groaned, both tired and irritated from the amount of times you’ve had to come running to feed your daughter in the middle of the night when all you wanted was to sleep. You sat up half awake and before your feet could ever meet the hard wood floor, your husband took your hand and kissed it with his chapped lips.

“Stay here, Mama. I got her.”

You took his word for it and laid back down on the bed, holding a fistful of the blanket as you felt Bill’s shirtless form leave the bed, mumbling something along the lines of Jesus fuck! My fuckin’ toe! when he stumbled and stubbed his toe on your nightstand. You smiled hearing the string of curses escape his lips, your mind imagining your husband trying to soothe your baby in the middle of the night.

Bill was thankful to have you in his life, you were his rock, his star. He was thankful for every moment you spent with him, every date that ended up with a walk to the ice cream parlor down the street, and every time he had to convince your father that he wasn’t a bad man because his nickname was Wild Bill. He thinks you’re too good for him—well, you did birth his child into the world! Not only that, but you’re probably the smartest and most beautiful person he’s ever met. Gorgeous? He’d consider it, but Bill thinks he’s gorgeous. Oh, and you’re sassy. Yeah, he really likes that one. Especially when you threatened to walk up to a federal government building to demand that the army give him full disability. He almost let you do it.

But it’s true that he thinks you’re too good for him. Sometimes he gets too ahead of himself and wonders if you’d be better off without him. With another man. Other times, he just feels bad for making you do all the work, so he tries to do as much as he can, even if it’s out of his reach. If Bill wants to do it, then he’ll do it.

Bill getting up to take care of your crying baby at four in the morning is just another one of those moments. 

“Hey, grumpy pants,” he says to his daughter, picking her up from the crib and plopping down on the rocking chair next to it, trying to shush her back to sleep because of course, saying Shhh repeatedly will always put a crying child back to sleep. “You’ve woken your Ma three times already, and she’s not gettin’ any sleep. When your Ma’s not gettin’ any sleep, she gets upset, and when she’s upset, she don’t wanna have sex with your daddy.” 

To no avail, the little tot keeps crying and Bill tries to rock her to sleep—anything to get her to stop crying. She’s probably hungry, but Bill told you to stay put, so he can take care of the situation himself and let you catch up on some sleep. He’s still new to fatherhood, but he thought he could put his little angel to sleep single-handedly like a pro because good old Gonorrhea is the best at everything. It’s a skill he’s been working on lately.

You hear her cries continue from the other room, so you crawl out of bed to assist your husband but they stop once you reach the hallway and stand in front of the doorframe. You expect to see your husband playing with your daughter and keeping her entertained for the meantime, but what you find is truly out of this world.

“Hey, Mama.” Bill smiles when you enter the nursery, your expression screaming confusion yet being alright with what you saw. “Pretty creative way to put her back to sleep, huh?”

You raise an eyebrow. Creative?

Your husband was literally in the crib with your daughter. Him, an actual adult. He was laying right next to her with a hand on her back while she held his thumb as tight as her little fingers could. It was a beautiful yet strange sight. You loved the sight of seeing your daughter and husband so close together, but you were also wondering how in the world the crib could support the weight of both of them.

“Did you really need get into the crib?”

“Woah, there—“ Bill smirked, “no need to get jealous. There’s plenty of lovin’ in this household from old Gonorrhea. Guess we know who she likes the most.”

You roll your eyes and walk over to the edge of the crib, taking in the entire scene. While Bill wasn’t the most experienced person when it came to caring for little children, let alone babies, he was sure dang good at it. A natural. “See, you’re good at this. She likes you.”

He scoffed. “Yeah. Just for my stomach. She loves sleepin’ on my tummy, tell me—am I really that fat for her to sleep on me in the crib?”

“I meant to ask you that—how and why did you get into the crib? You know you could have, I don’t know, picked her up?”

“Well, I knew she was probably hungry ‘cause she kept slappin’ my nipples, but I didn’t want to drag you from bed because I told you to stay put. And she was grabbin’ for me anyways,” he defended himself, looking down happily at your child. She’s definitely going to be a daddy’s girl. “Look at how beautiful she is, Y/N. Look at her! I probably can’t get up for the next three hours, but look! This is so cute. It’s cute as shit!”

“At least she didn’t try and suck on your nipples.”

“Damn...that would be weird. My nips would be all red and shit. Will you still love me if my nipples were red?”

“Yes, Bill, I will still love you even if your nipples are red. And you know you’re gonna have to give her up because I have to feed her now.”

“What?” Bill was shocked. He didn’t want this moment to end! It may have been four in the morning, but he felt so connected with his kid now. She may have dragged him into the crib for God knows how long, but he feels like an accomplished dad now. “Really? You’re gonna make me give her back?”

“Bill—“

“Over my dead body, Y/N. I like this. She likes this. She loves me! Our kid fuckin’ loves us!”

You laughed at your husband and rested your hand on his shoulder. “I bet she does. You are the world’s best dad, y’know.”

Bill smiles. Not because he realized how hilarious and ridiculous he looks being ten sizes too big for a crib, but because he actually feels like he’s done something right as a father. It was countless weeks of him being unsure of how to care for a mini human that he made, him sitting on the couch and watching you put her to sleep like it was nothing, him rocking her sleep for fifty minutes while also enduring the screeching sound of her cries. He’s never really felt like he’s doing a good job at being a parent. He wanted to get better, wants to be as good at his friends and his parents, wants to make his daughter laugh and smile at his square face.

This was a start, and Bill was willing to work on it some more. However, there was one thing he knew for sure when it came to parenting.

He was pretty damn good at it.

“Yeah,” he says, “I am the world’s best dad.”

[hermannsthumb]

maria I am literally begging you to write newt and hermann being sent off to meet hannibal

(this prompt is re: my answer to this ask)

god i think this kind of au is so fucking fun....also i always wanted to do a post-newt’s-first-drift missing scene (eyes emoji)

-------------------

Newt’s not sure what to say to Hermann after the Marshal leaves the lab. I told you so seems a little harsh, considering the circumstances--the fact that Hermann’s still deathly pale, that his legs are still trembling, that he collapsed into a chair the moment the door clicked shut and hasn’t been able to look at Newt since. He might start throwing things at Newt. Or crying. Newt’s not sure which is worse. Sorry you had to find me spasming to death on the floor. It’d be a lie; Newt’s sorry Hermann had to see him at an, uh, low point like that, but he’s not sorry he did it. Not after what it gave him. Thanks for saving me from spasming to death on the floor. Better.

“Hey,” Newt says. “Thanks, you know, for--”

“No,” Hermann says.

“...for saving my life,” Newt says. He forces a grin. “If I’d fried my brain out it would’ve been a total waste of time.”

“Newton,” Hermann says.

Newt scuffs his boot against the ground. Too soon. He hadn’t expected Hermann to be this--well, affected about it all. He thought the guy hated him. He thought the guy would’ve been glad to get rid of him. (Morbid, but whatever.) “Uh. Anyway. I gotta--get that brain. The kaiju brain.”

Hermann turns, sharply, blinking fast. “The kaiju brain,” he says.

“Yeah,” Newt says. Hermann’s being uncharacteristically slow on the uptake. Shock, maybe. Newt swipes the back of his sleeve across his still-bleeding nose--his button-up’s already stained beyond repair, not much more damage he can do to it--and snags his leather jacket from the back of his desk chair. “What Pentecost said? He needs me to do it again. I have to--”

“Yes,” Hermann says. He reaches one trembling hand for his cane and pushes himself to his feet. “The brain. I’ll be coming with you, of course.”

Newt’s jacket nearly slips from his grasp. He gapes at Hermann. “You’ll what?’

“I’ll be coming with you,” Hermann repeats. “You can’t really expect me to let you go alone.”

Newt does drop his jacket, this time, and immediately scrambles to pick it up, his face growing warm. “Hermann, that’s--” he stammers, “that’s really--” Here it is, what he’s been waiting for--some big, romantic confession, Hermann sweeping him into his arms, declaring it’s them against the rest of the world, that it was almost the end of his world when he found Newt bleeding and seizing, that he’d follow Newt to the ends of the Earth and beyond.

What Hermann actually says is “You wouldn’t last an hour without me.”

“Oh.” Newt deflates.

Hermann is already clacking out the door, his parka already--somehow--zipped up to his throat. It’s not even cold out. Totally unnecessary. “Do hurry up.”

Newt pulls on his jacket and scurries after him.

--

“If you’d walked faster,” Hermann says, glaring miserably at the night sky and the rain that pelts down from it, “we wouldn’t have missed the bus.”

“I’m pretty sure the buses aren’t fucking running, Hermann,” Newt says. “They haven’t been running in months. If you left your cave and socialized every once in a while, you might know that.”

“And if you hadn’t forgotten the umbrella--”

“I didn’t even ask you to come, you big baby!” Newt says. “You forced yourself on me!” Hermann scowls; Newt sighs, feeling a little guilty, and kicks at a bit of trash. He’s being an asshole and he knows it. Hermann might have perfectly legitimate reasons for not wanting to walk--his knee might be acting up, for one, like it sometimes does in the rain--and not to mention that Hermann did just save his life. “It’s, like, a mile. Do you want me to hail a cab? You’ll have to pay, since I’m kinda balling on a budget, man, but...” He’s not sure how much the brain is going to cost either. Or if it’ll cost anything at all. Maybe it’ll be like something from a spy movie--Newt flashes his PPDC badge, drops Pentecost’s name, and the Chau guy immediately wheels a brain out for him, no questions asked. What sort of favors does he owe Pentecost, anyway?

“No cab,” Hermann says. He flips up his hood with a great deal more sass than necessary. Newt has to admit the rain is kind of annoying; his hair is dripping, his glasses are impossible to see through, his jacket--and the clothing it’s supposed to be protecting--completely soaked. “I suppose I’ll have to make do.”

“Oh, how noble,” Newt says. He shines his black light on a nearby street sign, and the symbol from the card Pentecost gave him flashes into view, along with a little arrow. Very spy movie. Newt’s loving it. “Okay, it’s a right up ahead.”

The crowd doesn’t necessarily dissipate when they turn down the next street, but it does thin out, and Newt and Hermann are able to slip through a lot more easily. They’re also able to hear each other without shouting. “A mile?” Hermann says, squinting out at Newt from under his fuzzy hood.

“More or less,” Newt says. “Probably less. Be on the lookout for spooky guys in sunglasses.” He’s not sure if that’s what the dealers actually look like, but sunglasses seem appropriate. Fedoras, maybe. Black trenchcoats. Newt’s nose suddenly stings. “Ah. Shit!”

It’s started bleeding again; in a flash, Hermann is holding his handkerchief to it. “Pinch it,” he says, strangely gentle, “there we are, Newton.”

“Ugh. Thanks.” Newt screws his eyes up and tilts his head back, pinching as Hermann instructed. “I don’t know what I did.”

“Does it hurt?” Hermann says. One nervous, fluttering hand presses itself to Newt’s shoulder, to the side of his face, atop the handkerchief, then drops away, and Newt is reminded of how tightly Hermann’d gripped him when he dragged Newt out of his drift. “Or your head? Are you--?”

“Nah,” Newt says. “Just a fucking nuisance.” He draws the handkerchief--wet with rain, too, and stained a deep crimson--back, and sniffs and wrinkles his nose a few times. “Stopped again. For now. Do you mind if I hold onto this?” He waves the handkerchief around.

The corner of Hermann’s mouth twitches up. “Keep it. I don’t particularly want it back.”

Newt crams it into his pocket. He crams his hands into his pockets, too, fixes his eyes on the wet pavement, mostly to keep himself from doing something dumb like taking Hermann’s arm to feel one of those strong hands on him again. (Hermann never touches him; today, he has twice.) “Thanks, by the way,” Newt says. “I know I already said it, but--I owe you a lot.”

“Don’t be silly, Newton,” Hermann says. “It’s only a handkerchief.”

Newt glances up; Hermann’s faint smile has turn strained. “That’s not what I meant,” Newt says, but he has a feeling Hermann knows. He’s not surprised when Hermann says nothing. 

They hurry on. The rain picks up.

“How much longer now?” Hermann says.

Newt shines the black light at a cluster of nearby street signs. He shines the light at some a few feet ahead. He pushes across the street (no cars, down this way) and shines at some more there. Hermann is waiting for him when he pushes back, hood down, full brunt of his glare focused on Newt. “Uh,” Newt says. “We may have taken a wrong turn.”

Hermann bitches at him for the entirety of the time it takes to turn back, shine the light around some more, and find the right street to go down, which is a whole of ten minutes, hardly anything, but Hermann’s acting like Newt set them back, like, a whole fucking hour. “You didn’t have to come,” Newt reminds him, after Hermann finishes a tirade about Newt’s irresponsibility. “You really, really, really didn’t--”

“Of course I did!”

“I never asked you,” Newt says. “Pentecost never asked you. I wanted--”

“I wanted to keep an eye on you and make sure you didn’t get yourself killed!” Hermann says. “I wanted to make sure you didn’t do something even stupider than drift with a kaiju brain, since you obviously can’t wait to sacrifice yourself for some--”

Newt snorts. “Why do you give a shit if I get myself killed?”

Hermann comes to a staggering halt; he clutches, desperately, at Newt’s arm. “Because I care about you, you moron!” he shouts.

A few passersbys give Hermann a Look--the weird Brit yelling at the American in the middle of a crowded sidewalk--and, coloring fast, reeling away from Newt, he shrinks in on himself in embarrassment. Newt does, too, but for a different reason entirely. “You care about me?” Newt squeaks. (Here it comes, Newt’s sure of it: the confession, the sweeping Newt into his arms, the kissing him, even.)

“Of course I do,” Hermann says. He’s deceptively calm, in a way that means he might start shouting again very soon if Newt doesn’t play it cool. Kissing’s probably out of the question. “I care very much about you, Newton.” He works his jaw. “Finding you was--upsetting.”

“Oh,” Newt says.

“The thought of having not found you, of not reaching you in time, was even more upsetting,” Hermann says. “I was not eager to relive it.”

“Oh,” Newt repeats.

"You mean--to me--Newton, you and I--” Hermann swallows heavily a few times, sighs, rubs his hand across his face. His blush hasn’t faded. “It’s of no import at the moment. A conversation for another time, perhaps. We need--we need to, ah, get you your kaiju brain.”

“Right,” Newt says, though every bone in his body screams for him to beg Hermann to finish his fucking sentence. (What does Newt mean to him, exactly?) “I think it’s a left down here.”

--

Chau pulls a knife on Newt; Hermann smacks it out of his hand with his cane.

Newt almost swoons.

--

"Hey,” Newt says, as the kaiju shelter trembles overhead, as he trembles in Hermann’s arms, “there’s, like, a ninety percent chance we’re about to die, and I just want to say it was really hot when you--”

“Shut up,” Hermann says, and kisses Newt.

--

They don’t die. Newt gets his kaiju brain. Win-win.

[xserpentlife]

Open Your Eyes (Pt.2)

Requested: Anon Hello! Can I request a fangsxreader where she’s jughead sister and dating Fangs and instead of Fangs the reader is the one who gets shot and fangs is like super worried and thinking that reader could die? I love loveloveeee your blog so much thanks.

A/N: Part 2 hope you guys like it. part three is coming out on Friday.

Warnings: Blood, mentions of death. Gunshot, guns

Word Count: Around 1700

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

“We’re here” Jug and I grabbed her in our arms carrying her in screaming for someone to help but no one was moving. “Someone help us!” Jug had me support her as he grabbed a nurse.

“We have a female with a gunshot wound please help her, please” The nurse just shook her head before a doctor barged out.

“What is going on?”

“My girl got shot, sir please help her, please you gotta”

“Get me a gurney now!” I tried following them back but was stopped by the doctor.

“Son you can’t come back here I’m sorry, wait out front”

“I need her! I can’t let her be by herself”

“If you need her, then let me help her!”

“Take care of her!”

The doctor disappeared behind the doors, my last glance at Y/N was her eyes closed on the gurney. Fuck what I would give to be able to see her eyes again. I just stood there before Pea came over grabbing my arm and leading me to a chair next to Toni. Jones nowhere in sight. I sat on the chair not able to move. All I wanted was for her to be okay, to see her eyes again, see her again. I didn’t even realize what was going on until I felt my back slam against a wall. Jughead grabbed me up out of the chair shoving me into the wall. I didn’t say anything, he was angry I knew that. He was pissed and he had a right to be it was all my fault.

“I fucking told her to stay home, told her to fucking wait and that I would bring you to her but no of course not. Fuck Fangs why would you let her do that. She just had to fucking come and see you, had to push you out of the way of that stupid fucking bullet. That should be you back there not her!”

“Let him go Jug, he didn’t do anything”

FP ran in then.

“Where is she! Where’s my daughter?”

“She’s in surgery dad” Jughead had me held up as FP began yelling in my face as well.

“Is she gonna make it? What did they say?”

“I don’t know, they just took her back”

“This is your fault Fogarty, why the fuck would you let her push you”

I stayed silent, my eyes glossed over with tears about to spill.

“I told you to protect her! The one fucking thing I asked of you when it came to my baby girl and you fucking failed. Failed Fogarty and now she’s back there fighting for her god damn life.”

Jughead pressed me harder against the wall. “If she dies Fangs. I’ll fucking end you.”

“I…” Sweet Pea came over shoving them off of me.

“Cool it, Jones, let him down”

“Need I remind you I am your leader Sweet Pea!”

“Fuck off Jones, get off your leader bullshit for one minute. Fucking think for one second. Your daughter and your sister is back there fighting for her life because she stepped in front of Fangs. You standing here yelling at Fangs isn’t gonna change that she is back there fighting! Yeah, maybe it wasn’t her best decision but she did it because she loves him. Because she cares about him more than anything else in this world. So maybe you both need to go take a walk or something. You need to let him down don’t you see he is hurting just as much as you, he’s just letting you yell at him taking all your hits because he doesn’t care about anything but being able to see Y/N again. I don’t really give a shit what you do but stop fucking yelling at him for no reason because it’s stupid to blame anyone here but Mantle who had the gun, which by the way anyone know where he is?!” Jughead let me down right then as FP grabbed his shoulder walking out of the hospital. As soon as he let me go I fell to my knees. I couldn’t hold it in anymore, tears came down full force. Usually, I wouldn’t cry but right here right now I didn’t care at all. I looked up to Pea who had kneeled in front of me.

“What if she… what if she’s gone because of me. It’s my fault, Pea. What if…”

“Stop with the what if’s Fogarty you know how fucking strong she is. Think about it, she is basically indestructible. Hell think about when we met her”

“Your right Pea. Fuck she was such a badass.”

“Yeah, I remember you were flirting with her but she poured the milkshake on you and told you that you were thirsty. Oh my god, I remember it like it was yesterday. She wanted to fucking smack you when you said you wouldn’t have been able to drink it anyway cause your lactose intolerant”

“ Oh yeah I forgot about that part”

“She was pissed”

“I know I thought she was about to throw mine on you two, but remember she just took it cause she wasted hers on you. Said she deserved it”

“She always says she loves your smart ass comments, guess that’s why you guys fit so well. She has the same exact ones makes me wanna pull my hair out”

“Pea, Oh my god remember the time that dude smacked her ass and she put him into a chokehold and basically body-slammed him. That dude was like twice her size ahha”

“Yeah and we were standing to the side and you wanted to take care of him for touching your girl”

“Dude I was pissed wanted to shove him across the room but she beat me to it”

“I thought she was just gonna smack him across the face or something, but nope she really went there. No guys mess with her now!”

“I remember our first date too fuck remember I called you freaking out, I screwed it up so bad but she didn’t care”

“What when you caught the pasta on fire?”

“Look I don’t know what happened”

“I do, you forgot the water, you know the one thing pasta needs to cook and uhm I don’t know not burn!”

“I was nervous!”

“Wasn’t she talking to Toni when she pulled up”

“Yeah Toni tells me about it all the time, I’ll never live it down. She pulled up when the stove was on fire and saw me trying to put it out through the window, she rushed in and fixed everything up. She started eating the hard pasta just to make me feel good. Turns out she actually likes chewing on hard pasta. But anyway we went to Pops after though and it was all good. But she did make me drink a few sips of her milkshake cause she ‘wanted me to try how good it was’ and I regretted that instantly”

“Oh yeah you kicked her out of your trailer after bringing her back cause of your terrible gas, haha she called me and asked if you had some condition or something!”

“Wait she what!”

“Oh, I wasn’t supposed to tell you that… oops”

“We have been dating for years and you haven’t told me that she thought I had some farting disorder!”

“She promised me to secrecy Fogarty”

“Jesus Christ”

“She fixed everything that night, she always does. With her, it’s like nothing can go wrong. Even if I’m in the worst mood everything turns up when I see her. Literally, with her everything is right. Fuck Pea… I can’t lose her. I won’t”

“She’s gonna be fine she always is. Plus she wouldn’t leave me here to deal with your ass alone. Now go sit down I'm gonna grab you some food”

“Thanks” FP and Jughead came back in as Pea sat down and handed me a sandwich.

“Any word yet?”

“No”

“Fuck” Fp slammed his fist into the wall

“She’s gonna be okay I know it”

“You know nothing Fogarty!”

“No shit FP, I know nothing because none of us have heard anything and we have been here all night. I haven’t moved a fucking muscle. Look FP I love her just as much as you do. She is my fucking everything okay. I would do anything. Don’t you think if I could be the one in there right now I would be! She is my life, my world. I… fuck I need her back as much as you do… I need her”

“Look I’m sorry Fogarty I just… she’s my baby girl, my everything too. I don’t wanna lose her either. Fuck if she knew I yelled at you she would be wringing my neck right now, fuck I’d give anything for that to happen right now”

“She’s gonna be okay”

“You don…”

“I may not know for sure, I may not know what is going on. But Y/N is a fucking fighter you know that more than anyone. Who was there with Jug when you went downhill FP. Who stayed and had your back that entire time even though her father was slowly slipping away. Who took care of the Serpents why you were going through all that shit. Fuck who took care of Peabody! Y/N is the strongest person I have met in my entire life. She will get through this. I know it”

“But you don’t know that Fogarty I could lose my daughter!”

“Yeah and I could lose the one person who means the most to me in the world so I guess we're in the same boat FP”

“Both of you need to stop. She wouldn’t want you fighting. Fuck I could lose my sister, Pea could lose his best friend. The serpents lose their family, but we won’t because she is strong as hell we all know that. She is going to be okay”

“People for Y/N Jones” The doctor came out then I stood right up along with everyone else.

Taglist: @chipster-21

[cupidoargiades]

final warning

A/N - please click here for the full MX mafia masterlist. this will be shownu's chapter of the MX mafia series :) i had so much fun writing something so ... different ... for once. you'll see what i mean if you read it, but don't @ me if it's too much for you to handle: i don't put trigger warnings for nothing. thank you!

TW - imo, this thing is a disgusting abomination, so please don't take these warnings with a grain of salt: angst, gore, degradation, torture, dominance, physical pain, anxiousness, violence

NOTE - this will be your final warning, (no pun intended) proceed only if you're sure you're not (easily) triggered by any of the trigger warnings i wrote above. i tried my best to write down as many warnings as possible, just to make sure i don't accidentally trigger someone who just wants to read some angst. thank you for reading, and enjoy ... i guess ...

-

"unless you have my, and only my permission, never go to the basement."

those were the words shownu told you from the second you joined MX. it was pretty obvious what was going on down there; it wasn't called a torture chamber for nothing, but nonetheless you had always been curious. the urge of sneaking to the basement was growing bigger and bigger, as there was no sign of permission being given anytime soon; he didn't trust you that much yet. the curiosity started taking over your decisions, driving you crazy until the point that you couldn't help but try and go downstairs.

somewhere in the middle of the night, you stood in front of the basement door. you took a soft breath before placing your hand on the door handle, which sent shivers down your spine. it was oddly ice-cold, contrary to the other ones in the building.

pushing the handle down, you slowly opened the creaky door, and clicked the lights on. the staircase was dimly lit, and you walked downstairs, your feet now cold on the concrete floor. even before looking around, you felt a sense of fear and anxiety wash over you.

glancing over the dark walls, you took a shaky breath. rows and rows of weapons, different kinds of electrical cords and a shelf with tasers, knives and even some surgery equipment. a mental image of shownu using those weapons on a victim gave you the shivers, as a big freezer caught your attention.

it was dirty and stained. upon opening, you found many body parts of all sizes wrapped in thick, bloody plastic with a price tag on each bodypart. from hands and feet to femurs and hearts, you inspected them before pushing one package aside and spotting a full on head in there, skin turned pasty white with blue lips. you quickly recoiled and closed the freezer, noticing both your body and breath get shakier.

lastly, there was a big collection of papers. newspaper articles, email screencaptures and pictures of targets. the pictures of the people were by far the worst, a red cross over their face if they were assassinated. you tried to read one of the newspaper articles titled 'Five bodies found dead in downtown Seoul' but you were interrupted by the door aggresively slamming shut.

your breathing hitched as the clicky sounds of footsteps came closer. freezing in your spot with your back towards the staircase, a warm hand covered your mouth as another squeezed your neck, making it hard for you to breathe. "what'd i tell you?" he said clearly. you now realized it was shownu, which was both a big comfort and a intimidating threat; maybe the biggest one you'd experience in your life.

with shaky breathing you tried to turn your head to him, but he turned your face away from him again. "answer me, you worthless piece of shit! what'd i fucking tell you?!" you hesitated once more before he abused the control of your breathing by squeezing his hand tighter. your hands reached the one wrapped around your neck as you tried pulling it away, but you failed miserably.

"y-you told me to not go here- unless i was allowed to.." you whimpered, as he let go of you entirely. you collapsed on the floor, trying to catch your breath. he grabbed your wrists and dragged you to the chair in the middle of the room, making you cry out for help.

"shownu- please..! no- i only wanted to-" "i don't care, you whore" he interrupted you carelessly as he kept you in your seat, tying your hands behind your back tightly, followed by your ankles that were now secure against the chair. you softly whimpered and let your head hang down. you disobeyed him, and now you were about to suffer the consequences.

"why me..?" you softly said, just above a whisper. "because you didn't listen to what i said. and bad girls get punished." he simply said, cracking a smile before leaning down to your face. "and in my mind, punishments are the same as torture." he whispered.

"see those weapons on the wall? you've had a bit of time to inspect them, haven't you? how about you pick one." he suggested, walking over to the wall as he ran his fingers over some of the weapons' sharp blades or edges. "these cords are my favourite," he said, grabbing hold of two electrical wires. "but maybe that's a bit too... harsh for you" he said. "you're way too fucking dainty and delicate for that.. disgusting"

scared to death, you barely managed to even see the weapon wall, thanks to your tears blocking the view. "come on, clio, pick a toy for us to play with" he said innocently, yet sounding so threatening. "or- do you want me to pick? what an honour.. i can choose what to abuse you with? it's like christmas..!"

his eerie laughter gave you goosebumps as he took the cardboard box of surgery equipment. "all right, these should be fun.. wanna get an overdose? maybe you'd like a skin transplantation or- ooh- look at this, your nails pulled out.." he said softly, looking at his options before taking a rusted pair of pliers.

"say goodbye to your pretty, pretty nails, clio" he said, putting the box back on the shelf as he went behind you to reach your bound hands. "first up, the left ring finger.. always a disappointment for the person you're gonna marry.." he said, placing the pliers on the white part of your nail and pulling softly.

you tried to scream for help once more before he told you nobody, even if they heard you, would come and help. "not even that softie i.m. will come and get you, he's too scared of me. scared to mess with me. you should learn a few things from him, hm?" "please- i beg you- s-s.. stop!" you cried out, before he pulled a little harder. you prepared for the big moment, but it never came.

a loud clanging noise filled the room as the pliers hit the floor. his hand harshly met your neck as you flinched. "i hope that's gonna do the job of showing you why you should never come down here."

you now noticed you had been holding your breath the entire time, making you pant once he finished his sentence. "oh my god- thank you..! thank you, thank you, thank you.." you said, swallowing some thick saliva that formed from the fear you had a while ago as he untied your wrists, and then your ankles.

at first you were relieved he didn't actually do anything, but then the anger kicked in. "wh- why did you fucking do that..?!" you said, raising your voice as you tried to catch your breath. "couldn't you just- tell me to leave?! what if you actually ripped out my nails, you douchebag-" you said, jolting at him to kick him, punch him, smack him; anything to let out the anger.

before you could hit his stomach with your foot, he grabbed you by the ankle and floored you, your head bumping on the concrete floor after you fell. a dizziness filled your head, and shownu's tall figure was only made scarier thanks to the light behind him.

he noticed the fear in your eyes after he saw you crawling away, back now flush against the wall. "look- i'm not as bad as i seem, i promise. i just don't trust you yet. i have to show you i'm not one to fuck with, and you should never take my words with a grain of salt."

you couldn't say anything. for the second time that night, you were frozen in your spot. he patted your shoulder and gave you a heartwarming smile. "come on, get back to bed. you're gonna need it" he said with a chuckle before pulling you back on your feet.

eyes wide, he took you upstairs, where the boys were waiting in their pajamas. "is this what you woke us up for..?" i.m asked quietly, yawning as he wiped the sleep out of his eyes. he was quickly silenced by shownu gawking at him, before kihyun stepped forward to place a hand on your shoulder.

"your neck's all red.. and what's with your head..? let's do something about that, alright?" he said, taking you to the kitchen where he grabbed a cooling gel and an ice pack out of the refrigerator before leaving alone so you could calm down after all that had happened.

they quietly bickered outside of the kitchen, and you carefully listened in. "hyunwoo- what did you do to her..? she flinched when i put some cooling gel on her neck.. what if she takes revenge on you?" kihyun said in a disappointed tone. shownu only stammered a quick "i told her not to go into the basement, yet she did. she has to know doesn't need to mess with me or she'll get hurt. besides, a girl as delicate as her can't even be angry at me without getting scared off in two seconds."

hyungwon started to scold him too, trying not to raise his voice. "she's killer at aiming guns, you know, literally. be careful what you wish for, hyunwoo, because you just might get it."

wonho looked around before spotting your head peeped around the corner. he quickly walked over to you before someone else noticed and took you by the upper arms. "stop eavesdropping, clio, you're gonna get yourself killed.. please go back to bed, i'll make you some breakfast tomorrow, okay? 9 am, i'll see you downstairs.."

[jay-and-dean]

Je ne te mérite pas (I don’t deserve you) EPILOGUE (end)

DeanxReader

Serie MASTERSILST

Warnings : Violence, swearing, Smut, unprotected sex (you are smarter than this), Fluffy fluff.

Words : 3k+

Chapter summary : Is the ring on his pocket going to convince Jody ?

gifs not mine, found on google

Dean’s Pov

My lungs are trying hard but breathing is impossible now ; and that ache in my throat is barely bearable. This vampire’s grip on my neck is so strong I know I won’t stay conscious long. My eyes land on her. She’s crying and screaming but I can’t hear her anymore, even if I can see how loud she yells.

My love.

Two vampires are holding her and she fights like a lion. But those fuckers are strong and twice the number we reckoned, they had a plan, we were reckless…

I don’t want to die.

I’m so happy. I’m so in love. For the first time in a very long time I really don’t want to die. Please Chuck, don’t let them hurt her.

Sammy wake up. Please Sam…

Everything is in slow motion now. The vampire continues talking to me but my entire mind is on her.

Let her go sons of bitches, you’re hurting her arms…

She’s crying. Please Baby don’t cry.

And suddenly something happens. A miracle maybe…

The vampire let go of me and falls on his knees. I take a deep painful breath and try to reach for my knife but the vampire starts to convulse and puke his own blood.

I land my eyes on Y/n.

Wow.

Her beautiful eyes are white and her hair floating like she was underwater. Her arms are reaching out toward me, hands open. She’s screaming like crazy, her mouth wide open, but it’s perfectly silent. All I can hear is the monster at my feet choking.

I can’t move. I look at her and the vampires that were keeping her still both take a step back and try to run. But Sam woke up, he cuts their heads off and run toward me. I’m frozen. Eyes on my girl, my love.

“Y/n !” Sam yells.

Her hair falls on her shoulders and her eyes take their sweet warm color back.

“Dean…” she sobs and I run to hold her in my arms before she faints.

______________________

Baby’s engine purrs gently. Sam’s looking at me, I can feel his stare. She’s still unconscious on the back seat but she looks so peaceful.

“Her powers are coming back…” Sammy finally says.

“I know” I state, looking at the road.

“You do ? You don’t seem so worried, I mean, you’re girlfriend is unconscious on the backseat of your  car. You just, you just carried her here” he talks gesturing things with his hands. “ Have you ever seen her kill a monster with her mind ?”

“No” I admit. “See Sammy, since we’re together, she… Some weird things started to happen. She didn’t even notice at first. I thought I was going crazy but she visited me I my dreams Sammy… It wasn’t me dreaming of her, it was her coming to rescue me from my nightmares of hell, of purgatory, of dad…”

I check on her in the rear-view mirror. It’s time I talk to Sam, she’ll forgive me.

“One night I had trouble sleeping because of a wound on my chest, I had just accidentally rub it on the mattress and it hurt, so I was lying on my back, watching at the ceiling…” I half smile not really knowing why. “And Y/n, she turns and, still sound asleep, she puts her hand on the wound and start whining. Before I realize what’s happening, the pain goes away and she starts bleeding at the exact same place I was hurt an instant before. She literally took my pain Sammy… So I started questioning her about the nightmares, and she knew things, details she just couldn’t know if she hadn’t been there for real, in my bad memories… details from hell…”

Sam is listening carefully, he sighs.

“Why did you never talk to me ?” he asks.

“She wanted to talk to you herself. She’s terrified. She thinks she’s becoming a monster…”

“And what do you think ?” he asks.

“I love her. This last month have been the best of my life… So what my girlfriend has powers ? I mean, we live with Satan’s offspring and he’s a great kid. I don’t care what she can do, I’m glad even. I mean, the things she does, she saved me… again. I say she’s closer to be an angel than actual angels.”

“I think…” Sam says with a smile filled with emotions. “I think you’re healing her. She suffocated her powers out of trauma, right ? And now you two are together…”

I can’t help but smile at the idea that she’s so safe with me.

“Dean ?” she whispers weekly.

I park the Impala and silently ask my brother to drive, he nods with a smile.

She’s in my arms, talking to Sam, telling him she needs helps learning to control her powers and Sam is reassuring her. I don’t speak, I just keep her here, safe against me, my nose in her hair.

Each time he mentions the potential of her powers, I feel her shiver and I squeeze her tighter in my arms. She’s always so brave, but this terrifies her. I’m not going to leave her, ever, or to see her like a monster and she knows that, I told her a thousand times. Still, she’s been tortured for years because of what she was… And all this brings back the past, and her past is not just filled with pain, but with emptiness too. Her name doesn’t mean anything to her, she has no family…

That’s why I want to marry her, make her part of the family, make her a Winchester.

But first, we need to talk to Jody I guess.

 Your Pov

 Shit, this book is boring. You try to stay focused but it’s nearly impossible. You’ve always loved reading, and now that the bunker is your home, you swore you’ll read everything you could. You sigh again.

“You know you could skip that volume” Sam says, putting a coffee in front of you.

“Thank you Sammy. No I can’t, knowing all I can is part of this job”

“You know… the way you take hunting so seriously, I think you’re a real woman of letter…” he says with kindness.

“Yeah except I don’t torture people or show contempt for hunters.” I mutter taking a sip of my coffee.

Sammy sits next to you and starts to push my shoulder. You try to ignore him but he does it again and again, until you almost fall of my chair.

“Fu… Are you insane Winchester ?” you yell.

Since you made fun of Sam for being too serious, he took the habit to randomly attack me to prove me wrong.

“You’re too serious” he mocks you.

You get up and carefully puts your book on the table. He closes it and you scream :

“What ? Why ? I’ll have to read pages again before I found were I was !”

He laughs.

“This is war !” you groan.

“Yeah but Dean’s not here, nobody can defend you !”

And with that you jump on his back, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist. He tries to turn to catch you but he doesn’t want to hurt you, so he can’t really use his hunter’s skill.

Suddenly, you feel to strong hands grip you from behind and take you off of Sammy.

Dean.

He kisses your neck and puts you on the ground without letting your waist go.

“Dean, please, I need you to avenge me” you say.

“What did he do ?” he asks, rubbing his delicious scruff on your neck.

“He lost my page” you pout.

Sam laugh and Dean squeezes your waist, kissing below your ear. Humming slightly he starts growing hard on your lower back and you moan despite yourself. Sam roll his eyes and leave with a smirk.

“No time for that, Man, you have to defend my honor !” You try, but Dean turns you in his arms and start kissing you.

“I’ll slay him later, Woman” he murmurs, starting to kiss your throat.

You put your arms around his neck and let your head fall back to grant him full access. Playing with his hair you smile.

“I love you Baby” he says before kissing your mouth again, smiling in the kiss.

“Liar” You say kissing him back. “You won’t ever kill your brother for me.”

He puts his forehead on yours and laugh.

“Hum… Hello”

You jump. Mary.

Mary’s watching you two. How long have she been here ? Dean lets go off you and stumble :

“Oh hum… Hi mom. How, how long have you been here ?”

She smiles although she looks confused and looks at you.

“Long enough. So you two… Can I talk to you Dean ?”

“No” he says, taking you by the waist. “You are going to tell me she’s too young. Save your breath. Mom… You don’t know anything about our story. I love Y/n and she loves me. If you love me you’re going to be happy.”

She seems taken aback by the coldness of her son’s answer, and clear her voice.

“You know I love you…” she says. “Jody ?”

“Not yet” he says. “Tomorrow.”

 _________________________

Mary won’t stop staring at Dean and you. And he won’t stop acting natural, this is awkward because his hands are always on you, he keeps randomly kissing you as usual, and giving you sweet names, except his mother is there.

“Dean and Y/n are in love” Jack says proudly.”Castiel says they may be soul mates. You must be so happy !”

“I am” she says with amusement. “It’s just so new.”

 “Round two ?” Dean asks, rubbing your back.

“You mean round three…”

“The first one didn’t count” he laughs.

“It didn’t ? What ? It did, Dean, I’m sore from that round !” You turn and kiss his eye, just because you love to kiss his face.

“But Baby eating you out is not a round…”

“In this position it is…”

“God it was so sexy… holding your ass up in my arms… Fuck. I’m hard again.”

“Watch your heart old man” You say and you feel a sharp pain on your left ass cheek. “Wow ! Did you just… spank me ?”

“Did you just called me old ?” he groans and you laugh, bending on him.

You look at his face and kiss a freckle. He rubs your back and hums, closing his eyes. He knows how much you love to look at him closely, he knows that particular freckle is your favorite. He knows everything since you found him searching in the precious Dean box one night. You answered all the questions, you let him read my soul, he knows you like no one.

His hand comes to one of your breast and knead it.

“Mh… I love your skin” he whispers.

You look at his strong arm and at his jaw, you see his Adam’s apple move and smell him.

“Dean…” you moan.

His eyes suddenly open to look at you.

“Oh Baby you made that sound !” he says with a wide smile showing the teeth you want to feel on your body.

“What sound ?”

“That sound when you’re suddenly so aroused you can’t talk so you just moan my name with that specific voice”.

Fuck, he knows you so much.

“Take me Baby” you say snuggling up against him. “Hard.”

He groans and sits on the bed, taking your wrists to hold them with force above your head.

“Hard ?” he asks. “You want me to fuck you ?”

“I want you to use me” you say spreading your legs and licking your lips.

“Fuck” he groans low, biting your throat. “I guess you’ll have to ask nicely”.

“Please” you say, opening your mouth to take a deep breath.

With the hand that’s not holding your wrists he takes one of your leg and put it on his shoulder. You wrap the other high on his waist. Before you’re ready, he pushes in one strong movement inside you and you cry in surprise, light pain and pleasure.

“Take me” he orders, his eyes dark and his jaw clenched.

You smile, biting your lower lip. Dean is not often so dominant in bed, that’s what makes it so hot, feeling how strong and dangerous he is. The legendary hunter under the loving man. The darkness within the lights.

He starts trusting so hard your head join your wrists against the wall. You’re one the verge of crying, but not because the pleasure is mixed with pain, not because you’re scared –Dean never scares you- just because it’s so overwhelming.

He groans and bites you everywhere, living marks all over your chest. He’s not holding back and you love it, even if you know you’ll feel him for days.

Each inch of your body is reacting : you toes curl, your legs desperately try to close, you pussy clench hard, your belly tremble, it’s like every single drop of your blood is coming up to your head, you’re dizzy and burning.

And suddenly he’s out of you. You cry in surprise and your legs close as he withdraws. A tear run down your face.

“Dean… Please”.

And you feel him turn you around like you weighted nothing, he lifts your ass and let your head on the mattress. When he slams back into you, you scream in the pillow and grab the sheets, whining.

“I love you so much it hurts sometimes, you know that ?” he roars through his teeth.

“I know, D… Dean. I love you… Ah… you too Baby” you cry, trying not to scream.

And he pounds into you with force, hitting the right spots every time. He grabs your hair and turn your head to see half your face.

“Mine” he groans before his trusts become uneven.

You can’t hold on anymore and let the storm-like orgasm wash over you, making your brain die for a second. You hear him moan manly and he stills. Your legs are soaked, your breathing is short and quick. You feel him come deep inside of you and you whine, unable to think.

He falls besides you, out of breath, sweaty and beautiful ; and takes you in his arms lovingly. You turn toward him and nestle your body against his.

“You okay ?” he asks, kissing your forehead.

“Yeah…” you say in a lazy smile, drawing patterns on his chest.

“Am I still old ?” he asks interwining his fingers with yours.

“Never…”

You feel the need to sleep.

___________________________________

“Hey, Baby…”

You feel a kiss on your cheek. You frown and, without opening your eyes, you reach out to touch Dean. He’s clean and dressed. You whine and grab his arm.

“I think you want to shower before we head to Jody’s”

Your eyes open wide. Fuck, you’re visiting Jody today to tell her you have a relationship with his best friend… And you are covered in sweat and… cum and everything else.

“Fuck ! Are we today already ?” you pout.

“Yep !” he says with a dazzling smile.

“But I can’t walk… You broke me” you say before turning your back on him and hiding under the blanket.

“Baby…” his voice is suddenly really serious. “Did I hurt you ?”

You sigh and surrender, sitting.

“Of course not. I would have stopped you if you were hurting me. I’m just sooooo sore and soooo dirty and…”

“Okay drink that” he hands you a warm coffee. “And go to the bathroom Baby, I swear I’ll give you a massage and cuddle you for hours and find a hotel with a bathtub big enough for the two of us like you asked… But, Y/n, we can’t be late at Jody’s. I can’t be late. She is already going to kill me, I can’t imagine what she’ll do if I’m late or if you smell like sex so much”.

“I smell so much like sex ?" He nods with a smile. "Are you even more nervous than I am ?” you say taking a sip of your coffee.

“I’m panicked” he admits.

 Dean’s Pov

 I knock on the door and she obviously can see how anxious I am, because before the door opens, she slips a hand under my flannel and t-shirt, rubbing my lower back lovingly. When Jody opens the door with a wide smile, she takes it back.

“Hey, Dean !” she greats me. “Y/n, sweetheart you look great !” she hugs her. “Sam is not with you ?”

“Hum, no, he…” I stammer.

“He’s not” she just says.

Jody offers us a drink and sits on her chair, looking at us with that warm smile, while we sit on the sofa. She starts giving us news of the girls and stops herself after a few minutes. Y/n seems calm, I’m so anxious.

“So, Y/n, how is it going, with your powers coming back ? Sam says you’re making real progress.”

“Yeah, I am” she says looking kindly at me. “I can control some things now, like, I don’t break into Dean’s dream every nights anymore…”

I tense.

“Why always Dean ?” Jody asks as I feared.

Y/n doesn’t answer, she looks at me. I can’t talk for a second and Jody looks at us worried, seeing how nervous I am. Then Y/n puts a loving hand on my arm, opening her mouth but I cut her :

“Because we sleep in the same room I guess, or because of the bond…” I say looking at my knees but Jody doesn’t answer. “Jody we… Y/n and I, we are together.”

I finally lift my gaze to see her face, she’s processing, looking between me and Y/n.

“You two are what ?” she says frowning.

“We’re in love” Y/n says.

“Excuse me ?” Jody says coldly.

She looks at me and I nod.

“Y/n, go to your room” she orders sternly.

“I…” Y/n starts but Jody stops her.

“This one time you’ll obey, Y/n !” she almost yell.

Y/n looks at me and I nod.

“Dean…” she says.

“It’s okay Baby” I say immediately regretting using that word out of habit.

Jody wince and Y/n gets up and face Jody.

“I’m not a child. I’m leaving because you want to talk to your friend alone, not because I obey” she says before leaving the room.

“Jody, she… I'm sorry.”

“Stop” she says. “Are you insane, Dean ? Do you know how young she is ? Do you know what she is to me ? Do you…”

“You think I’ll hurt her” I cut her.

“Yes ! I’m sorry Dean but yes  ! What about Sasha ?”

“She broke up with him…” I sigh.

“But she loves him !”

“No. She’s always loved me. Jody I’m not so sure I’m bad for her anymore… Her powers are coming back because she’s happy. I’m… I’m not perfect but…”

“You’re life is…” she says. “Dark.”

“Hers is too. You said yourself that she looks happier than ever, relaxed… Listen, I tried, I tried to stay away from her but I can’t and she can’t either. I love her like I didn’t know it was possible.”

“Shut up !” she yells. “You don’t break my little girl’s heart Dean, you don’t !”

“I won’t. I will spend my life with her, protecting and loving her. Jody look” I take the ring out of my pocket. “I’m asking her to marry me.”

Jody looks at me with tears in her eyes. She takes the ring in her trembling hands and sighs.

"She's too young..."

"Not that much Jody, I mean, she's clearly younger than me but she's not a kid anymore. And let's be honest, she never was. Just like me" I say, taking the little ring back preciously. "Jody she really loves me, for a very long time. I know this must seem strange but I can feel it, everyday, how much she loves me... We're... Cas says we're soulmates."  I can't help but smile at that.

"So it wasn't Sasha..." she murmurs. "I really thought she was in love of him. It was you all this time ? When she said 'I love you' in her dreams when she cried in her bed..."

I nod, remembering what Y/n wrote about hiding her love for me.

"She fell in love with you all those years ago ?" she try to process.

I nod.

"Tell me you waited, Dean." Saying that, a tear run down her cheek.

I get up and come in front of her.

"Jody, hey... Jody. I didn't touch her when she was too young, you already know that. I saw her as a child. I fell in love with her a few months ago. I tried to stay away but she..."

"I need to call Sam" she cuts me and I nod, getting up.

 When I enter the her bedroom. Y/n is smiling. She comes toward me and kisses me with passion.

"You were great" she says between kisses. "She'll be happy for us eventually"

"You heard ?" I ask surprised and a little panicked. "All of it ?"

"You really thought I would go to my room and lock the door..."

My heart is pounding. I take her hand and kiss her lips shyly.

"That's not how I intended to ask you" I whisper.

"I can do as if I heard nothing if you want..." she says with that smile she can't hide.

"No" I say. "You and me we're never pretending. Now you have to answer me, would you be my wife ? I want to be mine."

"I already am yours, Dean. I can't wait to be a Winchester."

Big beautiful tears run down her cheeks as I kiss her slowly.

"Dean is the kindest, more selfless, bravest man I know, Y/n." Jody says at the door, making us jump a little. "Your love seems to be a blessing but being a Winchester is also a curse."

"Let me prove that wrong" my Baby says with a big smile, resting her head on my chest while she looks at her adoptive mom.

"Come here sweetheart" says Jody opening her arms. "You too Dean."

Feedback is soooo appreciated ;)

[snarky-badger]

Venom Movie Prompt: Reader is a Life Foundation scientist part-time that had been taking care of the Venom Symbiote and talked to it to pass the time and to monitor it's behavior. Unaware of what Carlton Drake had really been using them for she hears about a suspected break-in at work. Carlton is furious and wants his Symbiote back, starts to realize the secrets and is not sure if she wishes to stay there. She then gets a visitor that takes care of her like she did for them. -threshprince

Oh my, this turned out longer than I planned. I am incapable of writing short things, apparently. Haha.

I hope this is good enough  @threshprince It kinda got away from me at the end and turned into a bit of fluff, haha.

It had been your dream job.

You’d never thought that a paper you’d submitted to your University professor would have gotten you a part time job, never mind one at the Life Foundation itself!

But by some chance, some shining star, you’d gotten an interview with Carlton Drake himself. You’d been nervous, sure, but not so nervous that you’d made a fool of yourself, not if the part-time job you’d landed in his genetics department was any clue.

Learning that there was bonafide proof of alien life had rocked your world. Learning that you’d be one of the few allowed near such life while running genetics tests on it? Mind-blowing.

The first time you’d seen the alien ‘symbiote’ in it’s glass canister, you’d been surprised. You’d honestly been expecting something more out of the movie genre that you’d been low-key obsessed with during your teenage years. Alien goo, that wasn’t something that you had been prepared for. Well… was the Blob alien? You couldn’t remember.

Either way, it was weird.

Still, as you and your fellow geneticists studied it, you quickly came to a realization that it had some sentience. It definitely flinched away from the probes that were used to take some of it’s physical makeup, banged against the canister in an attempt to get loose, and the high pitched ‘scream’ that left it when one of the scientists quelled it’s escape attempts with the electric shocks had almost made you cry.

It raised some serious problems with you. You’d even mentioned it to the other scientists, but they had waved you off, laughing at you. You were too young, apparently, seeing things that weren’t there.

Your moral compass was starting to go off kilter.

You were unable to really do anything - you needed the job. You had so much debt to pay off from putting yourself through school, and the Life Foundation payed handsomely.

What you could do, however, you did.

A familiar screech reached your ears one day, and you looked up from your computer, scowling at ‘Adam’ a fellow geneticist with a mean streak a continent wide. He loved nothing more than to shock that poor alien for the slightest reason. Another thing that made you think the symbiote was sentient - it tended to hiss at Adam and press itself as far away from the man as possible whenever the Adam went near it.

“Adam, what the hell are you doing?” It was a dangerous thing, to stick your neck out with Adam around. He was a bully, in every sense of the word. He was constantly complaining to Carlton Drake that you were on the team, trying to get you fired.

But the screaming, it sent shivers down your spine. You were certain Adam used to torture small animals when he was a kid.

When Adam didn’t answer, you snatched your pepper spray out of your purse and rose off your chair, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach as you stomped over to him. “Goddamn it, Adam, stop torturing the poor thing!”

The heavyset man eyed you darkly, and you locked your knees to keep from running at the hate in his eyes. “Oh, fuck off. It’s not like it actually hurts it.”

“It’s screaming.”

“Hah. Sounds like singing to me.”

Oh good lord he was a sick fuck. “You’re getting off on this, aren’t you?”

That hit a nerve, because he rose his thumb from the security panel that controlled the instruments used to both subdue and take samples from the alien, then turned towards you, brows drawn inward in a glower.

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”

Well shit, you’d poked the wasps nest. “It means that I think you’re torturing the poor thing because it’s helping you get your rocks off. Probably the only way too, can’t imagine any woman with a brain going near a bully like you.”

He snarled something and took one menacing step forward, pausing when you stuck your can of pepper spray in his face. His eyes literally crossed as he stared at it.

“Touch me,” you growled. “And I will empty this entire thing into your eyes. If there’s any justice in the world, then it’ll probably fucking blind you.“

He breathed heavily, like a bull ready to charge, but took a step back. You kept the spray raised, stance ready in case he lunged or reached for you, but Adam merely glared at you a moment longer before snarling a curse.

“You just lost your fucking job, bitch. Threatening a senior employee and bringing a weapon past Security, you’ll be lucky if you’re not arrested.”

“Just fuck off before I figure out how to rip the shock mechanism out of this panel so I can electrocute you,” you snapped. Adam glared at you a moment longer, then turned and stomped back to his separate office space. “Jesus, how the hell did he pass the psychiatric screening.”

Sighing, shoulders slumped, you turned towards the canister, and the symbiote held within. “I’m sorry,” you murmured, daring to reach out to press two fingers to the glass. “I can’t– Adam’s right, I’m going to get fired. I needed this job, but if you’re as smart as I think you are, then it’s worth it. I’m sorry he keeps hurting you, and I’m sorry that you’re trapped here.”

There was a moment of silence, where the symbiote undulated in it’s prison - because it was a prison, you’d realized. It was a prisoner, and you and the others had been experimenting and cutting off pieces of it. Jesus.

You were about to pull away when it moved, pressing up against where you were touching the glass. You blinked, staring at it for a moment. It was the first, non-aggressive move it had made to date. Usually it thrashed and shrieked and tried to attack anyone that came near it.

Then again, if situations were reversed, wouldn’t you?

Figuring that it was your last day at the Lab, you decided that finishing your current DNA breakdown of the latest sample taken from the symbiote would be a waste of time.

So you pulled up a chair and kept your hand pressed against the canister, merely talking to the symbiote for the rest of your shift. Babbled about your classes as the University, and why you’d taken the job at the Life Foundation, then tangented your way to talking about little things. Your hobbies, dreams, your family. Told it about the City in case it ever got free, about the dangers and the beautiful things and the people that weren’t complete assholes.

When it was time for you to leave, you gave the symbiote one last look, then used your body to block your movements as you lifted a maintenance panel on the computer panel that controlled the shocking and dissecting instruments, feeling for the needed wires and yanking them out.

“There. No more shocks. Not until they realize it’s broken, anyway.” A sigh left you as you stared down at the imprisoned symbiote, fully convinced that it was staring back. “I’m sorry I can’t do more. I really am–”

Noise from the direction of the elevators made you frown, and you huffed when you heard Adam’s voice raving at someone, someone who turned out to be a security guard. “Looks like I’m going to be escorted out of the building too. God how I loathe that man.”

Shoulders slumping, you went to leave your lab coat on your chair, then grabbed your purse, pausing by the symbiote again before leaving the Lab. “If you see a chance to escape, no matter how small, take it. I don’t know what Carlton Drake has in store for you, but it can’t be good. If you need help–” You rushed to whisper your address as the security guard opened the glass door to the Lab.

“Ma’am? I’ve been ordered to escort your out of the building.”

“Never been happier to be fired from a job,” you spat in Adam’s direction as you stormed past the guard, flipping Adam off as you headed down the hallway. Smirked when you heard the guard tell him to back off - poor baby had a short fuse.

The next week and a half went by as boringly as possibly. You easily fell back into the rhythm of things before the Life Foundation job. Balancing school and waitressing at a bar was old hat by now, you could do it in those sleep deprived moments called ‘unconsciousness’.

It was while bringing drinks to a group of frat boys that you saw the headline - a massive explosion at the Life Foundation. Fifteen dead, more wounded. Carlton Drake was on damage control, saying that it was an accidental electrical fire that had spread to one of the labs and ignited some samples, but you knew better.

“Good for you,” you murmured under your breath. Stared at the TV screen a little too long if the look from your boss was any indication, and you quickly went back to work. This job, you didn’t want to lose. It didn’t have the questionable morality that the other one had. That, and the tips were good.

What you weren’t expecting was to find Carlton Drake waiting for you at the end of your shift. The man - dressed in a suit that probably would have set you up for rent for a year - was flanked by two muscled guards that quickly herded you towards, and into, the alleyway next to the bar.

“Where is it?!”

You blinked and played stupid. “Where’s what?”

Drake glared. “Don’t play dumb. The symbiote it’s gone! Attached itself to some guy and killed half the staff and security before vanishing into the damned City.”

You eyed the guards by his sides before huffing. “Well how the hell should I know?“

“Because you are the only one that seemed to have a rapport with the alien. I saw the security footage of you defending it from Mr. Harrison. Honestly, if you’d simply told me that he was torturing it instead of threatening him, you’d still have a job.”

“A job where I’d be dissecting a sentient creature. Pass. Hard pass. Some of us have this thing called ‘morality’.”

”Which is why the symbiote responded to you,” he pressed. When you stayed silent, he rolled his eyes and pulled out a business card. “If it comes to you, contact me. I’ll reward you handsomely. You’ll never have to work at a dump like this again. One call, and I’ll have an entire security force at your side in five minutes and a check in your hands in ten.”

You hesitated. That much money…. But the memory of the symbiote screaming in pain made you shake your head. “No thanks.”

Drake stared at you as if he couldn’t understand the words that had come out of your mouth. Finally, he glowered and shoved the business card back into his pocket. “Stupid girl. Fine, have it your way. You’ll be watched from now on. You won’t see them, but I’ll have people following you twenty-four-seven. If…. when the symbiote comes to you, and I have a firm belief that it will, I advise you not to get in the way.”

You glared at his back as he turned away, his two goons following a step behind him as he walked back to his black Cadillac, the driver holding the door open for him. The urge to run over and score the Caddy’s paint job with your keys rose, but you didn’t fancy a bullet to the head.

For the next three days, you had the firm sensation of being watched. It made your skin crawl. As Carlton Drake had said, you never spotted your tail, but you knew it was there. Hoped beyond hope that the symbiote had the sense not to come to you, because you really didn’t want it to get caught.

You wished you hadn’t told it where you lived. But hindsight was twenty-twenty.

One night, after a double shift at the bar, you were in your apartment studying, books open on the small kitchen table as you tried to put together something coherent for paper due in a week. The coffee was brewing strong - you were on your second cup, late hour be-damned.

All the windows were covered in thick curtains - new curtains that you’d bought to hide yourself from the prying eyes you knew were there. You’d even added two new security locks to the front door, and had an aluminum baseball bat nearby in case you needed to bash any asshole trying to get in. It was all you could do on a meager student’s budget.

You knew it wouldn’t be enough.

Which was why, when you heard a knock on the door, your first instinct was to snatch up that bat and get ready to bash some heads. You sidled up to the door and rose on your tiptoes to peer through the spy-hole, blinking at the guy on the other side. Tall, muscled, blue eyes, short brown hair, wearing jeans a shirt and a black leather jacket. Who the fuck was he and why was he at your door at…. You blinked when you realized it was one in the morning. Fucksakes you had classes at eight.

You rose your voice so you’d be heard through the door. “Who is it?”

“Uh, hi? Our– My name’s Eddie Brock. I, um, look I know it’s late and this is weird, but I have a…. friend who knows you.”

“Good for you. That tells me nothing at all about why you’re at my door at one in the morning.“

There was an amused tone to his voice when he spoke next. “If I were to tell you, you probably wouldn’t open the door.”

You rolled your eyes. “Well, now that all my red flags are up, this is the point where I tell you to fuck off.”

Silence stretched on for a moment, before mumbling was heard on the other side. Something that actually sounded like arguing. Oh goody. You had a crazy person on the other side of your door.

Eddie spoke up again a heartbeat later. “I’m not going away until you talk to me.”

“Then enjoy sleeping in the hallway. Also, if you’re still there in the morning, I am, presently, in possession of a bat. Which I shall happily use on you if you make me late for class.”

“You got a chain on that door?”

You scowled. “Two. And a bat.”

“Then you don’t have to let me in. I just want to say my piece and then I’ll leave. Scout’s honor.”

You waffled over that for a moment. Maybe too long, because there was a curious ‘hello?’ from the other side of the door. “I’m thinking!” you called back, pushing away from the door and pacing a little.

Crazy man outside the door, assholes keeping watch, and you had a bat. Yeah, you were going to die.

Sighing, thinking perhaps, lack of sleep had made you stupid, you slid both chains into place, then unlocked the door and opened it enough to peek out. “Talk fast.”

He blinked at you. “You’re prettier than he said you were.”

“Okay then. Closing the door now.”

“Wait, wait! I’m sorry. Please don’t go. He’s been driving me nuts for days trying to get me to come here.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “And who would ‘he’ be, exactly?”

“He calls himself ‘Venom’.”

“Uh huh.”

Eddie rose a hand to rub at the back of his neck. “I’m fucking this up. Look, I’m a reporter. I was trying to expose Carlton Drake and his Life Foundation for experimenting on homeless people and– Are you alright?”

You felt like throwing up. He’d been doing what?! God, it was so much worse than just torturing aliens. It took everything you had to keep from having a mild panic attack. “Sorry, Mr. Brock. I don’t do interviews.”

“Oh, no. I’m not here for that. I got too close to the truth and he… Look, long story short, I know about the symbiotes.”

Plural. There had been more than one. Your brain latched onto that and didn’t let go. “There was more than one?!”

He frowned. “You didn’t know?”

“No! I— Wait. Why the fuck are you here then? Who the hell is your ‘friend’ and why would…. they….” Your voice trailed off at the familiar blackness that extended from his ‘jacket’ and reached out to touch your hand. You’d thought it would feel sticky or wet, but all you felt was a coolness as the symbiote curled around your fingers. “Holy shit. Holy shit! You shouldn’t be here! You can’t be here! Drake, he’s got people watching me! You have to run–”

A darkness flit across Eddie’s eyes. “They won’t be a problem for you anymore.”

You went still. That hadn’t been Eddie’s voice. 

Well, at least your hunch that the symbiote was sentient had been proven. Take that Adam.

Eddie blinked a bit, the blue returning to his eyes as he met your stunned gaze again. Even quirked a smile at you as you watched the bit of symbiote retreat from your hand and vanish into his ‘jacket’. “We promise, we won’t hurt you.”

You felt like babbling incoherently. Instead, you slid the chains off and opened the door fully, stepping back as he entered. Kept a hold on the bat, mostly because you felt too numb to let go of it as you mechanically closed the door, locking it.

He was eyeing all the open books and scattered papers on the kitchen table when you turned to look at him, and Eddie glanced up when he felt your stunned stare. “You’re not going to pass out are you?”

“Don’t get snippy, I have a bat,” you mumbled as you staggered past him, going to sit down on the edge of the couch. “So, it– the symbiote. It is sentient.”

Eddie moved to lean on the wall opposite you, thankfully giving you the room you needed to process things. “Painfully so. Can’t get it to shut up half the time. Ow! Goddamn it!” You looked up to see him rubbing at the side of his neck, where a tiny bite mark was visible. “Quit it!”

“You bonded with it.” You and the others at the Lab had guessed that it would be possible for a human to ‘host’ the symbiote. It hadn’t been proven, merely an educated hypothesis. But you knew now that Carlton Drake hadn’t been merely ‘studying’ the symbiotes. He’d been experimenting on them, and on people.

“Yeah. Drake…. Bastard caught me while I was snooping around and used me as an experiment. He expected it to kill me, not bond with me and use me to escape.”

“Use you?”

“Wasn’t exactly planning on bonding with an alien,” Eddie drawled with a tired smirk. “It’s been…. hard. It– Venom. It’s predatory as hell. Kill first, nevermind the questions, y’know? But I can be a stubborn bastard too. And apparently symbiotes prefer willing hosts rather than ones they have to constantly fight with. So we came to an…. understanding. I honestly didn’t expect him to drag me here. Or that he even knew anyone else in the City.”

You tightened your hand on the bat at the curious tone of his voice. “I had a part time job at the Life Foundation. I didn’t know about…. most of what you told me. The human experiments, the other symbiotes…. I’m just a geneticist, fuck I’m still in University…. I’m basically a glorified lab rat. I thought it was a good job but….”

“But you figured out the symbiote was sentient.”

“Yeah. There was another scientist that liked to torment it, and I threatened him into backing off….” You rose your gaze to Eddie, who was watching you calmly. “Is it alright? It’s safe with you?”

“Kinda more like I’m safe with it.” He let you digest that for a moment before pushing off from the wall. “He wants to talk to you. Is that alright?”

You blinked. “It… it can do that?”

“With a host, yeah. Just…. don’t scream.”

“Scream? Why would I–” Your eyes widened as blackness encompassed Eddie. It cocooned him, growing bigger, easily growing to seven feet tall, massive shoulders and arms, hands tipped with wicked talons. Pale eyes opened to peer at you, a long tongue curling out from a large fang filled maw to lick at it’s lips.

Okay, yeah. You felt like screaming.

Barely managed to stay quiet, merely clinging to your bat. A bat that the creature in front of you could probably use as a toothpick after it killed you and ate your corpse.

It - Venom - seemed upset at your fear, a voice like dark, predatory, rolling thunder filling the small apartment. “SHH, LITTLE MORSEL. WE WOULD NEVER HARM YOU. DON’T BE AFRAID.”

Afraid? Oh, you were beyond afraid. “To be fair, you’re…. very different,” you grated out. “And big. Very big.”

“HEH. THAT WE ARE. EDDIE IS A GOOD HOST. IF A LITTLE ANNOYING.” Venom walked across the room, crouching in front of you and reaching out to place a massive hand against your face, cupping your cheek. “WE WOULD HAVE KILLED HIM, BUT WE REMEMBERED YOU. REMEMBERED WHAT YOU SAID, THAT NOT ALL HUMANS ARE LIKE DRAKE OR ADAM. THAT SOME ARE LIKE YOU, KIND, BRAVE.”

Your breath left you in a trembling sigh. “Not that brave. I didn’t want to leave you there. I really didn’t.”

“THEY WOULD HAVE KILLED YOU, WE KNOW.” He rumbled, brushing his thumb across your cheek before pulling away, tilting his head as he regarded you. “WE WANT TO KEEP YOU SAFE. WE TOOK CARE OF THOSE STALKING YOU.”

“Stalking– You mean Drake’s men? But, he’ll know you’ve been here!”

A chuckle left him, low, baritone, predatory. “WE KNOW HOW TO COVER OUR TRACKS, MORSEL. THEY’LL NEVER FIND THE BODIES.”

You didn’t know if that was a comfort or not. Finally decided that you didn’t much care. Drake and his assholes could rot in hell. “Thanks. I didn’t much like them shadowing me all the time.”

“WE KNOW. WE WERE IN THE SHADOWS WHEN DRAKE OFFERED YOU MONEY FOR TURNING US IN.” At your horrified and shocked expression, he rumbled again, soothingly this time. “WE KNEW YOU WOULDN’T SIDE WITH HIM. BUT WE COULDN’T MEET YOU UNTIL WE TRACKED DOWN HIS MEN. THERE WERE MANY.”

“Do I even want to know how long you’ve been tailing me?”

A hissing laugh left him. “PROBABLY NOT.”

“Alrighty then.” Your hand cramped from clutching at the bat as tightly as you were, and you winced a bit as you forced your stiff fingers to uncurl from around it, setting it aside. Venom seemed pleased that you’d set your ‘weapon’ aside, a happy sort of murring noise leaving him. “So…. why did you track me down?”

“WANT TO KEEP YOU SAFE. AND….” You blinked at the tired grumble that followed. “EDDIE SAYS THAT WE SHOULD LEAVE, NOT INTRUDE, BUT WE HAVE NO WHERE ELSE TO GO.”

Did you really want an alien crashing on your couch? A sigh left you as you gave that some thought, but, in the end, you knew you’d cave. You had told the symbiote to track you down if it needed help, and it had. Hadn’t expected it to drag someone else along with it, but that just made things more complicated.

“Alright,” you murmured, smiling a little at the happy rumble that left Venom. “You can stay. You can sleep on the couch.”

He blinked and offered up a curious hiss. “NOT WITH YOU? YOU DON’T TRUST US? WAIT– EDDIE IS COMPLAINING AGAIN. BOUNDARIES?”

A soft laugh left you. “Humans don’t usually share beds with people unless they’re in a relationship with them.”

Fangs were bared in distaste. “THIS IS MORE WEIRD, COMPLICATED, HUMAN THINGS, ISN’T IT?”

“Yup.” You sent a glance at a clock, sighing when you saw it was past two-am. No way you were going to get any work done on that paper now. Class was at eight, and you had to be up and out of the apartment by seven. Five hours sleep…. ugh. “Look, I’m tired, and it’s so late that I’m going to skip my classes tomorrow. Lemme get some sleep, and I’ll let you ask all the questions you want about us weird, complicated, humans. Deal?”

“HEH. DEAL.”

Two hours later, you woke up to the feeling of a large body slipping into bed behind you, now-familiar cool tendrils curling around you as large arms encased you in a hug.

A low rumble sounded in your ear. “COUCH WAS LONELY. AND TOO SMALL.”

Absolutely no clue about boundaries.

[heoneyology]

Monsta X "We Are Here” in LA

I’m doing this before I completely lose all memory of the concert!!! askljafsdf I actually had an audio recording of me going through the hi touch line that I was attempting to normalize before posting this so I could kinda do it together?? but unfortunately the audio is kind of funky and I can’t get it to work :’)) literally the only interaction you can make out is between me and wonho.

anyway of my concerts I’ve been to this year, I would rank monsta x as the best overall performance-wise, and second in management. there were some hiccups on the side of powerhouse that left me waiting in line 4+ hours which was not the greatest but at least monbebe are the sweetest people in the world and I made 5 friends that day to a concert I went to alone and was kind of anxious about. by the time management came around and said we could come back later to pick everything up, we were all pretty dedicated to just waiting in line... basically management didn’t have tickets for ult vip and vip + all the freebies ready so despite being a numbered queue I still spent all but like 2-3 hours of my day in line, something I was hoping to avoid this time around.

uhhh so I’m just gonna go through what I remember, below the cut is a concert recap and hi touch recap! sorry for how long this is!

concert recap

the announcement about kihyun having injured himself started to circulate when we were all in line around 4-5pm waiting to get back in to the venue, and the hashtag for kihyun immediately picked up after that but it kind of shifted the energy of a lot of people waiting in line (which was weird to experience in a sense, it was kind of surreal, everyone was really worried about him)

of 21,000 people in the stadium, of a sold out concert, I ended up with one person in front of me I wanted to cry :’))

I literally, in my life, have only ever left one concert before this one (and it wasn’t a kpop concert) practically deaf.

they opened with shoot out and idk who decided to turn down the bass but being right in the pit next to the speakers you could literally feel the floor rumble as soon as the music started klajdlkfjsf

seriously the concert ended and I felt like I was underwater I couldn’t hear worth shit, I couldn’t hear clearly until halfway through the next day I literally thought something in my ears got fucked up

the screen rose and my eyes found jooheon immediately and I’m not sure if I lost all sense of self when they performed hero, the second song, or when I saw the screen lift and reveal him to be quite honest

watching kihyun separate from the boys and walk over to a chair on the other side of the stage almost fucking broke my heart at the start of the concert but oh my god if I could explain the look on his face? he didn’t seem to mind that he was injured, he was living out his dream and he was in a state of bliss and his smile and the way he was looking at the crowd... seeing him that happy made me want to bawl...

kihyun’s eye smile in person is probably the purest thing on the planet

hero is one of my favorite songs and hearing it live oH MY GOD- also the energy during trespass holy shit I can’t even explain it??

jooheon’s rap for trespass live is on some other fucking level

minhyuk, kihyun, and jooheon spent a lot of their time on my side of the stage so I have a lot of videos of them

sometime between the end of party time and start of play it cool I decided to stop recording and just kind of focus on cheering for the boys because kihyun kept walking by and I was trying to give him lots of love but uh jooheon was walking back towards the main part of the stage and I was holding up my lightstick against my phone (with my photocards of jooheon facing the stage) and uH JOOHEON SAW BRIEFLY AND POINTED AND WAVED AT ME I DON’T THINK I WAS COHERENT I ASCENDED-

jooheon also told a girl in our little area of the pit that he liked her headband it was the cutest interaction aklsdjfsk (there were a lot of jooheon stans in our area I chose the perfect spot tbh)

I forget what song it was after but streamers fell from the ceiling and at the end kihyun bunched all the streamers on stage up together and his small frame was carrying this ball of streamers almost as big as him and in front of my area of the pit he decided to throw the streamers and they didn’t go very far and he just... paused... and stared at the ball... then continued on his way... it was really funny akjldskfj he’s the cutest boy alive??? probably?

minhyuk is rude as fuck and his hips don’t lie he came over multiple times during fallin to fucking just... with his hips... in front of us... wheezes-

sambakja was my favorite unit stage for obvious reasons aklsdjdfjsdf jooheon came out and I realized what time it was and my only thought was uh oh here we go like fuck can he fuck up my bias list any more he’s my bias how does he keep?? doing shit???

I don’t really remember if he just dropped it or like it flew into the air or something but jooheon dropped one of his drumsticks and the little gasp that left me in the middle of this loud ass crowd it was laugh-worthy

jooheon had me convinced he was gonna crack a cymbal please calm down boy-

the VCRs were amazing shownu’s was an asmr mukbang and he kept shushing it was adorable and jooheon... jooheon cooked... that domestic au, wow, I love him...

myself was my second favorite unit stage, or tied with the maknae line’s tbh I was super sad when kihyun was sitting but god hyungwon, minhyuk, and kihyun in those suits and the song and the choreo alkjdflkjsdf

for all the photos of wonho during the mirror stage I’m surprised there aren’t more of shownu?? he was absolutely stunning I can’t even put it into words, wonho looked great but... shownu... had my full attention...

DJ H.ONE’S SET WAS THE COOLEST FUCKING THING EVER THE ENTIRE STADIUM WAS JAMMING OUT

hyungwon stopped and stared at monbebe’s a lot in awe and I stared at him in awe it was the sweetest thing, it melted my heart

jooheon did a lot of funky dorky things going back and forth across the stage I can’t even sum them all up??? like at one point he was doing this kind of crab crouch thing idek- and then at one point coming back toward the end I think minhyuk? asked him to show his abs and he teased lifting his shirt right in front of our section, I almost died-

monsta x and the fucking bottle flip was a kind of chaos I can’t explain

at one point minhyuk was chanting, “if I’m success, I am king,” and changkyun had to tell him to watch his pronunciation because it sounded like “if I am sex, I am king” like that’s the kind of chaos it was-

minhyuk pulled up hyungwon’s shirt to expose his abs at one point but all I really saw was his back from where I was but hyungwon’s reaction as minhyuk ran for his life aklsjdkfjs

my favorite interaction of the night had to be when minhyuk, hyungwon, and kihyun were discussing the myself stage and minhyuk was prompted to explain it in one word and he started to very very very slowly spell out “sexy” and he only got to s-e-x and paused long and dramatically before saying the y and monbebe were literally losing it screaming and he just kind of glanced at the crowd taken aback and then hyungwon just goes, “I think today he’s a little drunken, sorry!”

also during that interaction they made kihyun laugh and the poor boy was like, “don’t make me laugh, it hurts!” and I was ready to jump on stage and fight minhyuk tbh for making him laugh

I don’t remember what stage we were waiting for, I think it was h.one, but there was a very long pause and THE MONBEBE IN THE STADIUM STARTED DOING THE WAVE WITH OUR LIGHSTICKS AND WE GOT IT TO GO AROUND AT LEAST 7 TIMES, COOLEST FUCKING FANDOM EVER-

kihyun, jooheon, and changkyun’s ending ment made me cry. kihyun explained how standing on staples stage was his dream and it was so hard to stay mad at him for performing while he was injured. jooheon just... the love he has for everyone god that boy my heart... and then changkyun explaining the staples dream since their first kcon made me tear up and wow I’m so proud of them-

meanwhile shownu’s ending ment was him telling monbebe we’re an in-n-out burger LOL I love a simple minded intellect

hi touch recap

okay so for hi touch I was fucking exhausted, as I said I’ve only ever been to one concert that completely drowned out my senses and so by the time I got to the boys I wasn’t really coherent. in comparison to my past hi touches I wouldn’t say I fucked up because I wasn’t nervous but... I was just too tired to form words... maybe someday I’ll get this hi touch thing right!!!

for reference of my descriptions of them: I’m 5′7″ with small hands. all the boys were taller than me, so I did look up at them a bit.

kihyun wasn’t present due to his injury. this list is in order of how they appeared in line:

SHOWNU: I saw shownu and my heart melted, although I was very confused for a split second walking up to him (which probably messed up my train of thought more, because I wanted to simply just say to him “best leader!!”) because a staff dude that was ushering the line forward stepped in front of me to grab something off the table like dude wtf is with your timing-

anyway... shownu... is literally a god among men. the pictures don’t do him justice. he’s so handsome, so beautiful. he glows. he’s tall, I remember actually tilting my head back just a bit to look up at him. and he’s so tan and beautiful and his persona glows!!! he had on his trademark crinkly eye smile, which gave off a very reassuring, calming, and dorky air which really made me less nervous if I was nervous at all (I just remember being exhausted). he feels calm and safe.

I saw him and my heart melted and immediately I just blurted out, “hi!” in the most awed and amazed tone. I don’t remember if he replied but he smiled really cutely and he looked like such a boyfriend with his snapback on backwards and his concert shirt on, like you could literally hug the boy and with the air he gives off he feels so safe and comfortable and wow I love son hyunwoo!! he has really nice arms too, he was standing up straight and tall with his broad shoulders oof, and his hands were cold, kind of broad with long fingers.

CHANGKYUN: pictures don’t actually do changkyun any justice either, to be completely honest? he’s perfect in real life. he looks like a sculpture. him and shownu have to be the most handsome men in the entire world, I swear. his features are so defining and up close they’re that much more prominent. he’s literally drop dead gorgous. I don’t know how to explain it-

despite the intensity this boy gives on stage he’s really soft and intense in a more private way. I was already putty after seeing shownu up close but he was just an absolute sweetheart. I think he knew half the people going through the line were insanely nervous. the girl in front of me (who I ended up making friends with earlier in the day) biases him and managed to tell him she loved him and in reply he actually said, “I love you, too.” meanwhile my tired ass simply said “hi” to him and he said it back and his voice is so smooth and raspy and like... his voice is so soft and comforting. he was speaking quietly and kind of privately to each monbebe and making it sort of personal he’s so thoughtful and kind.

he was also half sitting on the table, like he had a leg up and was leaning against it and would kind of lean forward just a bit every time he high-fived someone. his hands were probably the coldest of all the members and he had long hands and a slender wrist. he also was very small and like... slender? overall?? he was still taller than me, though, so not small in that way.

HYUNGWON: is he... is he a fairy?? he didn’t even seem real. like I can’t even process that I saw and touched his hand... is he really real... hyungwon is so freaking pretty in real life and he’s tall and kind of lanky but he’s beautiful! he’s so tiny though a good strong wind could blow him away he was so freaking petite? and his hair was so fluffy!!! his hands are also very petite and long, and his fingers are so long. like my hands felt extra tiny high-fiving his...

but oh my god the way he looked at every monbebe though like?? he was so insanely happy to be there and to be saying hi to all the monbebe coming through the line. that look of awe I said he looked at the crowd with a lot during the concert? that was on his face during the hi touch. and each time a new person stepped up to him a little light lit up in his eyes and they sparkled, he was the cutest boy ever!

WONHO: okay so rip to any wonbebes that went through the line because if I had any sense or if I hadn’t been as exhausted as I was, I probably would have died. wonho. wonho literally was sitting half on the table, leaning across the table, with his hand stretched outward and I swear to god if there hadn’t been a table there he probably would’ve been in every single monbebe’s face. that table needed to be there. it was holding wonho back from monbebe, not the other way around kaljsd;lkfjsdf.

this boy though. I love him. the love he has for monbebe. it emanates from him. literally rolls off him in waves. from the way he was leaning forward and greeting people as they stepped up to him to the way the light shone in his eyes. he makes eye contact with you and he looks at you like you’re the entire center of the universe. and the soft, yet awed smile that was on his face. he literally looked like he was in love?? wonho’s pure love for monbebe never ceases to amaze me and seeing it in person, just... wow. but honestly rip to wonbebes because having him lean across the table with how buff he is can be slightly intimidating.

he’s the only one I remember my interaction with clearly, besides with jooheon. as I said hi, at the same time he blurted out, “nice to meet!” (not even a you at the end, just “nice to meet!”) in such a singsong, happy voice!! he was the only one with a warm hand of all the members, and they were broad, a bit meatier? idk if that’s a good word? with thicker fingers. they were smaller than other members but bigger than mine still. also his biceps are... and his broad shoulders... his muscles are no joke. that close it’s intimidating yet he’s the softest teddy bear I could cry.

MINHYUK: oh my god I have tunnel vision I am so fucking sorry I... don’t remember minhyuk. or my interaction with him?? I said hi, I think he said hi back??? he was loud, too, like his whole personality is loud... I remember him being taller than me, I remember very clearly his bright red headband and his fluffy mop of hair, and the fact that he literally had a :D smile on his face. but jooheon was on the other side of him and??? I have fucking tunnel vision I’m so sorry minhyuk-

minhyuk’s hand was really cold next to changkyun’s, but he has really long, broad hands with long fingers... his hands were huge... I remember his hand being in front of my face and him being on the other side of his hand and I remember looking at his hand to make sure I high fived him correctly but I was hyperaware of jooheon at this point, sorry to any minhyuk stans I have let down kalsjdfljdsf I’ll do better next year...

JOOHEON: okay so part of the reason I was hyperaware of jooheon while interacting with minhyuk was the fact that I saw jooheon smile at my monbebe line friend in front of me and I saw dimples and my eyes and heart practically lept out of my chest for him I really am so soft for and love jooheon akljsdkfjs. I stepped up to jooheon and at that moment my exhaustion went away for the split second to remind myself of all my previous hi touch mishaps and not to fuck it up with jooheon.

he looked so jooheon alkjdfsf he had on his hat and rag from the end of the show, and he was casually sitting on the table leaning against the wall behind him. his hand was also cold, and he has very slender and long hands and small wrists and long fingers. my hands were tiny... as soon as I high-fived him, I made eye contact with him and told him and I loved him, and jooheon literally went, “Yeee!” and smiled at me and his dimples poked through and he did that thing where he widens his eyes and raised his eyebrows?? here’s a gif for reference, it’s the third one in the set. he kept eye contact with me and I think I fucking shut down at some point because I giggled like a damn school girl as I walked away and almost collapsed in the lobby of the staples center when I caught up with my line friends.

also to any joobebes, guard your heart carefully because that boy’s eyes actually sparkle in person. I held eye contact with him so long that I noticed his little eye mole and his eye sparkle? his face is a little bit thinner up close but he still has those pudgy cheeks and full lips and he borders somewhere between absolutely fucking gorgeous and the most handsome man I’ve ever laid eyes on? and he’s a lot tanner in person??

anyway yes I love jooheon can you tell he’s an ult-

if you stuck around this long thank you for reading :’))