#oh also I would like the record to show that I did NOT censor the first one

[avery-braindump]

There's this lawyer on tiktok who reads silly court transcripts and I thought. I could make tgaa textposts out of this

[mariacallous]

A theatrical production based on the memoir of an ex-Hasidic transgender rabbi and activist, set to premiere in New York early next year, is scrambling to find a new home after its landlord rejected the script last week.

The landlord? The Roman Catholic Archdiocese of New York.

The production has become a casualty of a dispute between the East Village’s Connelly Theater, which had long staged provocative works, and the archdiocese, which owns the venue. The archdiocese has recently placed the theater under increased scrutiny, exercising a clause that gives it approval of plays shown at its property. The Catholic school that serves as the go-between between the church and the theater said it is “suspending all operations of its theater,” The New York Times reported.

Abby Stein, author of the 2019 memoir “Becoming Eve: My Journey from Ultra-Orthodox Rabbi to Transgender Woman,” was alerted last Wednesday that the adaptation of her book would no longer be permitted at the Connelly Theater.

“I can’t say I’m surprised,” Stein said in an interview. “I’m not going to come up and pretend, ‘Oh my God, the Catholic Church doesn’t like trans people, I’m shocked.’ I wouldn’t say that. I think we all know that. It’s just extremely frustrating that even in a place like New York, it’s still something you need to think about.”

She added, “It feels like we’re taking one step forward, two steps back. This shouldn’t be something we’re still worried about.”

Josh Luxenberg, the Off Broadway theater’s general manager for the past 10 years, resigned last Friday, telling The New York Times that he was reluctant to serve as a “censor rather than an advocate of artistic freedom.” The theater was built in the 1860s, according to its “About Us” page, which still lists Luxenburg as general manager and calls itself “a home for adventurous independent theater productions.” Its main stage theater seats 200.

The Archdiocese of New York did not respond to a request for comment. Its director of communications told the Times that the decision reflected longstanding norms about its oversight of content shared in its buildings. The archdiocese has previously required public schools renting space it owns to hold sex education instruction off-campus.

“It is the standard practice of the archdiocese that nothing should take place on church-owned property that is contrary to the teaching of the church,” Joseph Zwilling told the newspaper. “That applies as well to plays, television shows or movies being shot, music videos being recorded, or other performances.”

“Becoming Eve” tells the story of Stein’s journey as a rabbi and heir to a prominent Hasidic dynasty who left her insular community in 2012 and publicly came out as transgender in 2015. The book became a bestseller, and she became an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community and for Hasidic Jews who leave their communities. Stein is currently a part-time rabbi at the independent congregation Kolot Chayeinu in Brooklyn as well as an activist on causes including opposing Israel’s war in Gaza.

“I did not expect myself to be at the crosshairs of the Archdiocese of New York,” Stein said.

As an adaptation of Stein’s memoir, the play “centers on a conversation between Abby, her devout father and a young liberal rabbi, as they reckon with questions of gender and faith,” according to Playbill.

“Becoming Eve” is one of at least three shows booted out of the Connelly Theater by the Archdiocese. SheNYC, a summer theater festival for plays by female, nonbinary and transgender artists, said in a statement that it has also been told by the Archdiocese that it cannot use the theater next summer.

“It’s a total shock that somehow, strict conservative ideals are dictating what can happen in a NYC theater,” SheNYC posted on Instagram. “We’re heartbroken by this loss. And we’re not going to lie – this puts us in a tough spot for our 2025 season, which is also our 10-year anniversary.”

The comedy show “Jack Tucker: Comedy Standup Hour,” a solo show by comedian Zach Zucker, who is Jewish, featuring his alter-ego Jack Tucker, was in the works to transfer to the Connelly Theater in early September for a limited run following a successful turn at the SoHo Playhouse. But the archdiocese rejected the show days before it was set to begin. Zucker had to relocate and postpone the show.

In an Instagram post announcing the new dates and location, Zucker said of the Ccurch, “Why’d they do this? We’ll never know. But what I do know is that God will never stop me.”

“Becoming Eve” is written by Em Weinstein, produced by Dayna Bloom and Brian Lee, and directed by Tyne Rafaeli. It will be in previews in March and is set to premiere in April of 2025.

New York Theatre Workshop, which is producing the play, is in the process of finding an alternate venue.

“We remain fiercely committed to presenting Emil Weinstein’s compelling and singular play, Becoming Eve, in our season,” New York Theatre Workshop said in a statement. “We are profoundly disappointed by the Archdiocese’s decision and reaffirm our unwavering commitment to produce this powerful story. We are in talks with a new venue and look forward to sharing the details very soon. We are proud to produce this compelling story and to champion its artists and ethos.”

[re-bee-key]

Just watched the Tumblr Live QnA Panel, and here's some of my thoughts:

* Had to toggle on Tumblr Live to watch and agree to the terms.

The stream itself was a little low quality visually, not terrible, but either they used a low quality camera or streaming isn't up to the same quality as other sites like Tiktok

* the gifting feature that mimics Tiktok was obnoxious. Users that seem to use Tumblr Live a lot where using gifts very often. The gift icons would take up most of the screen covering chat.

Some people in chat suggested that the gifters were Staff plants to make the site seem more popular than it is. There is no way to verify if they are or are not. But these individuals talked in the chat about how they use Tumblr Live all the time, and some dont even have blogs they only use Live. Which is????

I don't like the gifting emojis. But i dont like them on Twitch or tiktok either, so shrug emoji, i guess

Questions Answered (that i remember)

* The Chronological Dashboard will stay. They mentioned this several times that tumblr, while they are going to improve the For You algorithm, the main Chronological Dashboard will not change.

* Tumblr Live apparently isn't blocked in Europe and is just waiting for approval, which is soon. They said it being blocked was misinformation. (Which i have no way to verify.)

* LGBTQA+ and specifically Trans content getting flagged or censored is a bug, apparently. They said it happens from time to time, but reporting should fix it. Users in the chat were unhappy with this answer since the issue has lasted for such a long time and doesn't seem or feel random. But they did not comment further.

* Tumblr posts being collapsable was not super addressed. They sort of skimmed over this question and just said that they try lots of new features to see what works and what doesn't. Apparently, there will be a toggle to turn this feature on or off.

* Tumblr Groups was addressed. It was shut down because not enough users used the feature.

Apparently, not many users use Tumblr Live either, but they want to keep working on it to make it appealing.

* Another bit about Tumblr Live. CEO essentially said they will not give the option to permanently toggle off the feature.

One user had asked if Tumblr had investors. CEO said, "Of course."

CEO did mention they "might" add a way to permanently turn off tumblr live. But it if they did, it would be a paid option over $20.

* One user commented that they are epileptic and that certain ads trigger their seizures because of the flashing colors and wanted to know what they would do for this issue. Tumblr CEO said "Well you could pay for No Ads."

CEO talked about paying to go ad free a lot. Saying only 25 thousand users pay for it at the moment.

Personally, it seems really irresponsible to suggest that the only way to fix an accessibility issue is for a user to pay money. As if disabled people dont have to pay enough as it is.

* I had asked if they were willing to work with more artists for Merch and Badges. They said they are working on it and there is a feature called Creatr that is set up to uplift creators and work with them on merch ideas.

I've never heard of Creatr. He seemed like we should have known what it was? Maybe they should promote that more. I know we all want more ways to support artists.

* More Badges and Achievements are coming. Apparently, a Legacy Badge that shows how long you've been on tumblr is in the works. (Im personally very excited about Badges.)

* Tumblr is thinking bout doing more QnA and even meet ups at different conventions and some even at the headquarters themselves. (They did not acknowledge questions that asked for a Headquarters video tour.)

Anyways, that was about all I can remember. Staff didn't record the panel, so hopefully, one of the other users did.

They talked about other random stuff. Calling out gifters specifically and rambling about donuts and books.

Oh, also, they brought a ball pit. Which is, yeah. Lol

[fountainpenguin]

"Frankly I feel insane, but you say you feel the same... and suddenly it's like 'HEY! I'm not crazy!'"

—

Well, this one's been a long time in coming! Scrapped it several times over the years, but... this is the right time for this piece and the right way to share this painful, prickly part of the story arc.

New 130 Reasons Why I’m Fairy Trash update today!

Fairly OddParents || One-Shot - “Looking Back”

Read on FFN || Read on AO3

Find more Devil's Train Purple Train story arc HERE

—

Denzel Crocker and Happy Peppy Gary - Fairy World's most wanted miscreants - have been summoned for community service at Spellementary School. Crocker has bid farewell to Dimmsdale Elementary and Gary..... has already said his good-byes.

Don't expect any record scratches or straight answers about how they got here, though. As our title suggests, we're skipping to the END of the arc as Gary and Denzel think about the past... and how awful it is to grieve in a world where time was frozen for 50 years.

—

Also, throwback to the OG preview image from 4 years back:

(First 1,000 words under the cut)

A/N - Content warning for nightmare and yoo-doo doll.

Opening scene is a trauma-induced flashback nightmare. It shows the aftereffects of someone who was injured via yoo-doo doll. All damage people take (including the yoo-doo doll) is canon-typical violence shown on-screen in show, but the main target is a human, so the situation is darker than it would be with a fairy.

There's no blood, but the nightmare might be upsetting. If you're sensitive, you may want to skip the italicized opening section-- in other words, you'd want to NOT read what's below, and just go straight to the FFN or AO3 links and skip the italics. Enjoy(?)!

—

32. Looking Back (End of Season 10 - "Dimmsdale Daze" is the only canon episode left afterwards, plus "Beast of Friends" crossover)

Friday June 25th, 2004

Year of Fire, Autumn of the Thawed Calendar

—

Buxaplenty's fairy is dying and Cabrera is screaming. Denzel didn't see what the buff, soul-crushing, and almost certainly SKULL-crushing Head Fairy did to him. Only that the hallway lights are blazing in and out of focus, humming with the threat of a power overload, and Gary is screaming above the crackled lightning. As Denzel sprints away, those screams turn to pleading sobs.

"No, no! Please, no! Don't put me in there!"

And then his cries melt into nothing at all.

Gary Cabrera is dead. Or if he's not dead back there, he got totally wrecked. May as well have attended the Dimmsdale Demolition Derby. Think of it! Fairy World's most wanted before they even knew he wanted them! Out like a snuffed candle! It's both gruesome and poetic. Horrifically cruel and terribly effective.

Denzel doesn't stop running. Oh, CENSORED nope.

"Wake up, you paycheck-booster!" he demands of the unconscious fairy in his arms, but even lightly slapping the muscular fairy's cheek isn't enough to rouse him. He's not dead. Can't be. Fairies… don't… die.

But Magnifico's head lolls to one side, his eyes - once filled with hope and starlight - lie open. Staring at nothing. Denzel skids around the next corner, fairy clamped to his chest with one hand and a lifted butterfly net in the other. No one stops him within those first two seconds. Gary stays silent down the hall, the lights no longer flickering overhead. The silence scrapes like a rusty razor down his skin.

Fairies and cherubs are in a crisis at the end of the hall. He only needs to make it halfway there, then veer left into the control room. He can make it. There's no other choice. Denzel inhales and plows forward. His shoes smack against the floor. Someone - far away - shouts in a high-pitched cloudland accent, like they've been sanity-deprived for far too long and have to let somebody know. Denzel lashes his butterfly net. He's not anywhere near them. It's just a threat.

"Magnifico, up and at 'em! Or I'll give you an F for FAILURE OF A FAIRY!"

The fairy's black hair streams against his arm. It tore loose from its ponytail long ago. Denzel suspects it must have been magic, not a hair tie, that kept those strands in place. What was it Gary said about blue magic? It's classified as "correction magic," though also associated with reluctance, irritation, rashness, and stress.

Here's the important part- items, spells, and hexes created out of blue will always shut down when a fairy falls asleep. Evidently, passing out counts as sleep just as well.

Purple magic undoes itself upon a fairy's death. It's emotion that picks the color of magic, not mere desire… So what did Magnifico use on his hair? He doesn't feel dead, but he isn't breathing. Not uncommon for creatures who soak in magic instead of oxygen to survive… but still.

How did this happen? Buxaplenty was watching the cameras! Everyone is at the Fairy World Games! No one knew they were coming, no one should have found them here… Denzel glances up at the lights as they buzz and snarl again. He puffs his cheeks like a gerbil and scampers like a mouse. Ooh, this is not as fun as he thought it would be when dancing a compass across his blueprints. His lungs might just give out on him right here and now. He's kept in decent shape as he's grown older, never taking any risk that a fairy might outrun him someday, but that doesn't mean he's not exhausted. The weight of it all is dragging down his eyelids. And his hunch.

There! Fairy World Archives' not-so-secret security room! It's even labeled that way! Metal nameplate on the door! Only one small guard has rushed fast enough to make it. Denzel smashes the butterfly net down on his head to take him out of commission. The fairy SCREAMS! Unimportant. Pathetic, really- it's good fun to be so feared.

Half the buildings in Fairy World don't even have proper doors, but this one does. Denzel kicks it open as hard as he can. Ka-BAM! Double scream. The door's wood is magical, but crumples like a napkin in the face of a furious human heel. He broke it like a beetle shell.

Is Buxaplenty here? Still breathing? It feels so wrong to save the immortal fairy and leave the human child behind to die, isn't it? Not only that, but he badly wants to know if Buxaplenty totally went and stabbed them in the back. Is he sitting at the cameras with the fairy cops and-?

… Oh.

The sound of the door bashing against the wall echoes down the hallway. It isn't returned by a shriek of alarm as Buxaplenty whips around in his swivel chair. In fact, Buxaplenty doesn't say anything. He lies slumped over at the control panel. Not moving. His green eyes are pinned open, like his fairy's, but they're unseeing. His breaths hiss short and fast.

He doesn't react to the door.

He doesn't react to Denzel or to the frozen fairy in his arms.

He… he looks like he's in shock. Total, utter shock, and suddenly Magnifico passing out makes a lot more sense. Their appendixes are still linked. The fairy can feel his godchild's pain. Denzel feels a twitch in the back of his neck. He jumps his eyes from the slumped-over Buxaplenty to the yoo-doo doll on the floor.

It's there and undeniable. The battered yoo-doo doll - blond and broken - stares at the ceiling with the same frozen expression now stitched across the boy's face. Buxaplenty is twisted at the desk, clutching his shoulder. He's shaking.

The doll on the floor does not have an arm. Yeah, that would do it, wouldn't it? Who wrecked him like this? Denzel stands there by the kicked-in door, gawking, as icy fingers creep across his skin. Oh… He might know now why Harrington's communicator cut off when she screamed. His heart lurches in his chest, swinging like a pendulum. His grandfather would have done swell with a ticker like that inside his clock.

"B… Buxaplenty?"

Ding-dong!

"I am not!" Denzel screams, bolting up in bed. Hhh- hhh- He scrambles for his glasses. His hand bangs the nightstand and bends with a twist. He knocks his water glass to the floor with a crash. Hhh- hhh…

… Hhh…

[Cnt'd on FFN / AO3 - Links at top]

[drumpfwatch]

How To Get Me To (Maybe) Vote For Trump in 8 Easy Steps

Recently, a Trump supporter asked me "what would it take to get you off Trump's back?" That’s always a good question, you know? You should always be willing to be convinced that you’re wrong. So in the interest of academic integrity, here is a list of things Trump would have to do to get me to consider voting for him and to admit that he’s not a fascist monster. And to be sure, I would be absolutely delighted to be wrong. I don’t like the idea that, somehow, this monster of a human being is neck and neck with the normal alternative. But if I’m going to believe that, then Trump needs to do the following:

1. Stop saying weird evil shit. I'm talking about him saying things like "Immigrants are poisoning the blood of our people," saying that they're "animals", because building an us vs. them mentality against a foe you dehumanize is fascism 101. Him saying he's going to bring back the Alien and Sedition Acts that was used to lock away Japanese people in internment camps is also fascist, but not as much as him talking about "the enemy from within" that he wants to deploy the military against. Yes he only says he’ll use it against “radical lunatic leftists” but then he goes and calls Kamala Harris, Nancy Pelosi and everyone who disagrees with him radical lunatic leftists. So who qualifies for that particular category of his? Because it sounds like it encompasses everyone who dares to oppose him. I’m talking about him threatening to remove the press credentials of any network that doesn’t lick his boots, because only a coward censors criticism like that. What happened to the free speech he’s supposedly so interested in? I'm talking about him saying that religious radicals "won't have to vote anymore", a statement that is terrifying regardless of if he's saying there will be no elections anymore or that he's so going to give the radical religious right so much of what they want that they won't ever have to vote again - which was his own explanation. He needs to stop saying he'll indict anyone who's running against him and he especially needs to stop saying that he'd make up the charges he'd levy. That he'd be a dictator (but it’s okay he’ll only do it on Day 1) in the name of retribution. And hey, what does "drill baby drill" have to do with retribution? Who is he getting retribution for? Is it the oil companies who are backing him? Or was he just trying to change the topic because he realized that saying he wants retribution against the American People is a losing proposition? I wished Hannity had pressed him on that. There are so many more, these were just the ones I could think of off the top of my head. For everyone you discount I can find two more instances of it, because this isn’t just a slip up from a guy who doesn’t care (or in this case, know how) to play politics or whatever, this is a constant pattern of behavior that he then doubles down on. Oh, excuse me, sometimes he clarifies, recontextualizing what he says to make it sound less insane when it very well could be even more evil. Whatever is causing him to say (and do) this sort of nonsense, he needs to get it in check if he ever wants me to see him as a viable candidate.

2. Put his for-profit companies in a blind trust for the entirety of his presidency. If he really wants to drain the swamp, he can start by cutting off this massive tool the oligarchs would use to try and buy him. This is something every president did, until him, and would be a great show of faith to the American people that he's willing to put his money where his mouth is.

3. Release his medical records, as every Presidential Candidate since ever has done. If he’s a “very stable genius” with the “best medical records of all time, better than Obama and Biden put together” he should have nothing to fear from this. And not some bullshit letter ghost written by him from his doctor, I want to see actual lab results and documents. 

4. Release his tax records, again, as every candidate since ever has done. If he’s not a tax-frauding jackass who is robbing the American People of what he owes, then he should have nothing to fear. If he does this, especially paired with #2, I see no reason why it would hinder him. He has nothing to lose from doing any of these first four, actually. 

5. Promise to fix the damage done to our constitution by every one of his Supreme Court picks by making the President accountable again, be it through constitutional amendment or other means. No President in the over 200 years of our nation has needed this bullshit king-level immunity, we don’t need it now. And yes, that is his fault. If the three he chose hadn't been there, it might not have happened. Besides, this is what happens when you steal Supreme Court seats, you are responsible for what they do. It doesn't help that all the other people who voted for it were also appointed by a Republican, but that's a discussion for another day.

6. Admit to the Big Lie being a lie. Joe Biden won the 2020 election, even according to Trump’s own DHS, and the only losers who refuse to ever accept defeat and instead complain about how the universe is rigged against them are whiny narcissist losers. If there had been actual tampering one of his lawsuits would have found it. And before you say the ruling class has a vested interest in taking him down, I'd like to remind you he shot off over 60 of them, to 60 different judges, and some of those judges were ones he appointed. At least some of them would have had the spine to do their job in the face of The They™, especially since he stacked the courts during his presidency. But they didn’t, because the minute his lawyers were under oath and subject to perjury laws they all suddenly stopped spewing the “evidence” they had for these crimes because they had fabricated it in the first place. 

7. Promise not to stop all of the DoJ investigations into him. If he’s as innocent as the right would have you believe, then the truth will show itself in the investigations eventually. If he’s not, then a man actually interested in draining the swamp wouldn’t exempt himself. I’ll tell you what, if Trump doesn’t settle his own lawsuit once he takes over the DoJ and gives himself whatever arbitrary amount of money he needs to pay off the debtors he’s beholden to, I will happily eat crow until I choke.

8. Apologize for all of it. This will be the hardest one because Trump’s words mean nothing to me. He’ll have to show he’s sorry, and that is a tall ask. I’m not even sure what he could do. Donate to immigrant funds? Donate to the Trevor Project? He could step down from running for President but then he wouldn’t be running, and the point of this exercise is to create a situation where I might vote for him. That said, simply doing the other items will go a long way to showing that he is interested in making amends, so that may be most of enough in and of itself.

If Donald Trump does all 8 of these things before he’s elected, then I will immediately stop calling him a fascist and apologize for ever calling him one. Hell, even one of these things would be enough for me to sincerely alter my opinion on the man, depending on which it is. I believe these to be entirely reasonable demands. Most of them are simply asking him to do things presidents have always done, and for good reason. The rest are things that, if he wasn’t a terrible person, he would want to do. If The They™ were really out to get Trump, then it wouldn’t be so all encompassing and total. There would be people at every level - not just the online extremists and Fox News - who would be standing up for him. Further, they’d be doing it in ways that are legally consistent. But they aren’t, because they can’t. Trump is a criminal and a fraud, and that was a thing he was guilty of before he even started running for office. 

If Donald Trump does all 8 of these things before he’s elected, then I will immediately stop calling him a fascist and apologize for ever calling him one. Hell, even one of these things would be enough for me to sincerely alter my opinion on the man, depending on which it is. I believe these to be entirely reasonable demands. Most of them are simply asking him to do things presidents have always done, and for good reason. The rest are things that, if he wasn’t a terrible person, he would want to do. This isn't a conspiracy of The They™. If it were, then it wouldn’t be so all encompassing and total. It wouldn't always lead directly back to him like it does. There would be people at every level - not just the online extremists and Fox News - who would be standing up for him, and doing so in legally consistent ways that stand up to general scrutiny of unbiased jurists. But no, that big target he has on his back is, near as I can tell, not falsely placed - it's there because he keeps giving people a reason to put a target on him.  But they aren’t, because they can’t. Trump is a criminal and a fraud, and that was a thing he was guilty of before he even started running for office. He runs grift after grift, and I am convinced that now he is trying to grift the entire country to get himself out of having to answer for his crimes. If you want to prove me wrong, show me that he's better than all of this. Give me a reason to believe that this man, who has time and again done the most insanely damaging things to our country, won't continue to do them, especially now that he has carte blanche to do them. I am begging you.

P.S. You’ll notice that I never said that he needs to apologize for all the racism, misogyny and other vile or disqualifying behavior. Because, you know, on some level, I get it. I’ll even admit it - I’d probably vote for a homophobic, misogynistic, racist sack of crap if they appealed to my political desire to, say, end global warming. I would probably hate every second of it and hate defending that decision to my leftist friends even more, but I’d do it because the issue means that much to me. So I get the idea that sometimes you have to swallow your pride and vote for an asshole. But Trump isn’t just an asshole, he’s a wanna-be tyrant. A wanna-be tyrant who was explicitly told us that he plans to be a dictator and persecute his political rivals just because they’re his political rivals. THAT is what matters to me. And if he wins, and when he starts doing the things I warned you about, don’t act surprised to me.

[josephthesnailshow]

Burnt Luigi (Post #3)

Hello, it's Joseph again. I apologize for not posting about this in so long, and unfortunately, I couldn’t get video footage last night. My computer keeps acting up, and it’s driving me insane. This might be because Avast, my anti-virus software, kept tagging Project 64 and my Super Mario 64 file as viruses. I uninstalled it, so I should be able to record it later.

I should also point out something. When I was writing this post, I noticed that my wallpaper had changed to that disturbing grayscale photo of Luigi, the same exact one that showed up during my gameplay. This startled me because it was the normal desktop picture earlier. Thankfully, I was able to change that freaky Luigi photo back to the original one.

I’ve attached a screenshot of my wallpaper from that time for those who are curious.

As of last night, I haven’t really checked the Mario Amino much, and thankfully, when I did check, there were no messages from that Luigi guy. However, when I checked Discord, like I usually do, I was instantly hit with a message.

Burnt Luigi: Hello, JosephTheSnail.

Oh, for the love of God. Yes, this thing has the “APP” (formerly known as “BOT”) icon, which shows that Burnt Luigi is a bot. Yeah, I know, Captain Obvious speaking here.

Burnt Luigi: How are you today?

Me: ...Good...?

Me: You?

Burnt Luigi: I am fine. Remember me?

This guy must think I'm stupid or something. Of course, I remember him. I had to deal with him in these past posts, and I sent him a very toxic response (which is usually what I do when someone makes me super annoyed and angry).

Me: OF COURSE, I REMEMBER YOU! I HAD TO DEAL WITH YOU AND YOUR STUPID “OoOoOoOoOoO SpOoKy” SHENANIGANS. CAN YOU PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE ALREADY?!

That was too much, I know, as he basically just asked if I remembered him. However, if you were reading my original posts about this freak, you would understand why I hate this guy by now.

Burnt Luigi: I AM NINTEN–

Me: Don’t. Start. It.

Burnt Luigi: Why shouldn’t I? You banned me from the Mario Amino.

Me: No, I didn’t lol.

Me: I am not even a leader or curator there.

I am sorry for not bringing this up in my second post. Judging by the fact that a former curator, TakeAsoda, deleted the chat and I blocked Luigi, I didn’t have the chance to see if he was banned from the community or not. But when I asked a higher-up in the Amino, they informed me that yes, they did ban Luigi from the Amino, so there you go.

After I said that I am not a leader or curator, he started saying random gibberish, and of course, I started responding with annoying sentences used by other users.

Burnt Luigi: The earth is flat.

Me: Who asked?

Burnt Luigi: Donald Trump is actually the 45th president.

Me: Okay, but who aksed?

Me: asked*

Burnt Luigi: I am Nintendo.

Burnt Luigi: Your death in real life will be by being burned alive.

Me: ...

This guy was definitely trying to scare me by giving me those old-fashioned death threats and, of course, using that ridiculous “I AM NINTENDO” catchphrase of his.

Burnt Luigi: I HATE YOU!

Me: Very original.

Me: To be honest.

Me: I am becoming less and less scared of you by the moment.

Clearly, I lied when I said I was becoming less and less scared of him, as he later sent me my home address. Obviously, I am going to censor it for my safety.

Burnt Luigi: You live at [*********].

Me: ._.

Like anyone with sense would, I reported the user for exposing private identifying information. Luckily, Discord took action and dealt with the user.

Post #3 (Epilogue):

Hello again. I know I said hello twice, but after that one Discord incident, I've been having recurring nightmares, and I remember them all very clearly. Some of them were unrelated, but half had something to do with that copy of Super Mario 64.

Something inside me really wants me to sit down, shut up, record, and play the game. Please trust me; I don’t know what’s in that game, and I don’t know what it wants from me.

I will share my nightmares with you.

Please forgive how short the paragraphs are; there isn’t much to explain here.

I had one nightmare where I was doing my nightly walks, and there was a moment in the dream where I felt like I was being followed.

I kept walking until I felt it.

It was a gloved hand, and the fingers touching my shoulder felt bony. I couldn’t even feel the nails, so I immediately stopped and turned around. I was going to tell this freak to stop following me and get a life.

“HEY YOU—”

I stopped when I looked at him; he looked like Luigi, or at least a man who looked very similar to him.

The man said, “You've got to help me.” I seemed confused and looked behind him, noticing a house on fire. I immediately took action and called the ambulance. They arrived quickly, but all of the people in the vehicle looked like Luigi; everybody looked like Luigi. I rubbed my eyes, and they turned out to be normal people.

“Is everything alright?” they asked me, and I said, “Yeah.”

As I was going to explain the burning house and the identical Luigi fellow, I noticed a dragon-like creature in the far distance; it was revealed to be Bowser. You knew what to expect by now: screams were heard, and the town was burning to a crisp.

I woke up in a sweat, hoping to get a nicer dream. I slept again, and once again, another dream.

I woke up in a claustrophobic tunnel; the walls had the same texture as the ones seen in the basement of Peach’s Castle. It was extremely dark down there, so dark that I felt very paranoid as I imagined some unsettling face appearing out of the darkness and staring at me.

With each step I made, I heard the footstep audio from Super Mario 64 (duh, what did I expect) coming from behind me.

I got even more paranoid with each step until I couldn’t control it anymore.

I made the big mistake of turning my head to see Luigi’s burnt and charred body; he wasn’t in his N64 model, but instead, he looked more like he was made in CGI. I saw every unsettling detail of his corpse: his rolled eyeballs, the burnt eyelids, horrific teeth, and holes in his clothes, such as in the torso and gloves, revealing bone.

It made me uneasy.

Obviously, I kept walking, staring behind me, which stopped him from following me. I was afraid of turning my back.

Once again, I risked my life. Even though this was a dream, I started running and running until the tunnel became wider. The footsteps behind me got louder and louder. I looked behind me and saw Luigi trying to catch up to me until I looked around me again.

What I saw was a hallway full of Luigis standing, making me afraid to touch the wall, even though that seemed gross. It got even grosser as I started smelling the stinky breath of the plumbers, which is typically what you expect from rotting corpses.

They all started chanting.

“CONTINUE PLAYING THE GAME!”

“CONTINUE PLAYING THE GAME!”

“CONTINUE PLAYING THE GAME!”

I started to cover my ears, still running and yelling “Stop...” over and over again, until they all went away, along with the one chasing me.

My fear soon went away until I entered the courtyard, where I saw the Power Star fountain in the middle.

Feeling calmer than before, I looked into the fountain, and what was originally fear turned into sadness. I saw Luigi, the real one, stuck at the bottom of the fountain; he was being held by tentacles or vines.

His face was incredibly pale, and I noticed blood coming out of his jaw. Clearly, he was trying to live on those air bubbles that allow you to breathe longer underwater (if you’ve never played Super Mario 64 in your entire life).

I noticed that he was reaching out his hand to me, which made me assume he was trying to get help from me. I rolled up my sleeve and grabbed his hand.

I was mumbling, “Come on, you can do it, buddy.” Luigi immediately tried to grab my hand with as much strength as he could. I started to hold my grip to prevent myself from letting him go, with my anger boiling, knowing for a fact that his burned counterpart was responsible for this.

There is no way this was an accident, and there is no way Luigi would just casually fall into the fountain and be held by vines. Plus, he would use his strength to get out.

This was not the case.

Thankfully, we were both making progress. As I saw his face peeking out of the water, he was gasping for air. I successfully pulled him out of the water as Luigi’s color started returning.

“Luigi, please, are you okay?!”

Luigi then replied while coughing up some bloodied water, “Joseph, please finish this game. Save the Mushroom Kingdom for me and my friends.”

Luigi spoke once more: “Wake up; there is still time. Stop him from ruining my reputation further.”

I woke up, and I will finish this game in my next post. I will do it for my safety and his safety and figure out how to end that monster once and for all.

[kuronekonerochan]

Reminder that Moroccanoil, the main sponsor of Eurovision is an Israeli brand.

So when we say the EBU's double standards regarding Russia and Israel is not fair, it's because that decision was not made, but 100% bought off. So yes both ESC and Moroccanoil deserve to be boycotted.

It's why they chose to criticise a Swedish-Palestinian artist for wearing a keffiyeh that was a family heirloom. "But palestine isn't in the ESC so they can't have symbols in..." Bullshit. We had an Italian-Egyptian singing in arabic in 2019, we constantly had contestants incorporating their ethnicity in songs like Australia this year.

So it's not that "symbols of other countries are forbidden", it's just symbols of palestine that are censored like Hatari showing a palestinian flag.

So let's be clear and cut the bullshit. ESC didn't expel Israel and expelled Russia because the circumstances were different.

They did it because to them the Israeli sponsorship money speaks higher than the screams of 15.000 children dying and thousand others maimed, malnourished and sick without any access to food, clean water or medical care BECAUSE OF ISRAEL ALONE. In Rafah alone there are 600.000 children trapped with no safe place to go. 2 million innocent civilians are displaced.

So, excuse me if I am not overly disturbed about a singer who is singing a song promoting genocide that had to be altered 4 times to "tone it down", who has made very public statements about being excited to join the IDF, being "harassed" bc the audience booed her. Said audience that was censored too with anti booing technology that replaced the hardcore Eurovision fans' vocal opinion about her participation with fake recorded applause track.

"Oh, but Eurovision is supposed to be just about music, not politics."

First, they proved that is false when they banned Russia.

Second, a genocide is not "politics". It's the worst crime against humanity possible and just like companies who profited with the Nazi deserved to be found guilty of being accomplice to genocide, so does the ESC deserve every boycott possible for choosing to let sponsor money dictating their decisions over their own criteria.

Post WW2, the german people denied knowledge of the atrocities the Nazis committed in the camps. Foreign nations denied knowing what was going on and allowing it to happen. The Holocaust changed the world and the UN was created to prevent it from ever happening again.

Today, even with all the media manipulation, we can watch real time a genocide unfold and the amount of people supporting it are already staggering, but the way larger amount of people who don't care at all, who are inconvenienced and annoyed because their entertainment is being disturbed by the slaughter of thousands of children and think their Met Gala, their Eurovision should go on as they were and that the problem is the protests (that have been peaceful until either the police or zionists attack them), the boycotts, and the "harassment of the poor girl singing for Israel", when all that is stacked against a genocide, those are the people that scare me the most. The ones who don't care. Because I know who they would have sided with and indulged in Nazi Germany and I never thought it would be so easy for so many to look away from the atrocities and caring only about their vain interests. The western governments have failed us by being complacent and complicit in the ethnic cleansing of Palestine. The UN has been exposed as a failure because even when the entire world tries to stop an ongoing genocide, a single country with veto power ensures it keeps happening, with the support of a couple of european countries. They failed the palestinians and failed humanity.

So no, where you see a silly fun song contest that "shouldn't be about politics" I see a morally bankrupt institution that caved into sponsorship interests and has voluntarily let itself be bought as an accomplice in denying the genocide that's happening and also promoting the culprits in the media as just another western fun nation singing in harmony with us instead of active and current perpetrators of a genocide.

Hi friends, I am learning this morning that Joost Klein and the Netherlands as a whole may be disqualified from Eurovision. Why is that, you ask? Well, our lovely Dutch gabber chose to do a little heckling during the press conference, shouting"Why not?" After the Israeli press rep told Eden Golan that she didn't have to answer a question regarding why she felt comfortable performing the show when it put others in danger. He also would actively cover his head with a flag during her speaking portions. As well, he explicitly asked for the Isreali team to not record him during some of their video filming. They did anyway. That takes us to today, where, from down the grapevine I hear that comments were made by the Israeli team regarding Joost's deceased father of whom his song is dedicated to, and he retaliated full force. Not sure what this means, or what will happen to him, but I support him in standing up to Isreal on what is at present one of the largest Israeli stages.

[bearpillowmonster]

I know you see Moana 2, this year no less, but really it's not all that exciting. One of the reasons Moana was so good in the first place is because it was from Jon Musker and Ron Clements, who literally made the Disney Renaissance and Moana was their last film. Plus we had Lin Manuel Miranda basically at the top of his game because this made the most name for him, only after did he get all these other hit roles to play in the music department or even acting and well, none have hit as hard, so he's apparently not coming back.

I'm not discrediting whoever takes these people's place, I'm sure they do great work, which the director was already announced and he also did Raya which...brings me to Disney's most recent track record. They just haven't been doing so hot with good movies, I think maybe Encanto actually made a splash and everything else has been received mostly poorly. So who's to say how Moana 2 will be any different.

They also announced a series of other projects that were in the works and their release dates with Inside Out 2 and rough years for other sequels and a whole frickin Disney universe in Fortnite, you think this is a joke?

But you have to realize why they're doing this, why today just all of the sudden, I mean it's just a bit odd that- OH MY GOODNESS

They're baiting you. They're trying to cover up as much as they can saying "Look, look what we have in store this year, forget all about a few hours ago and what's to come later on." It's all so obvious, it's all so planted, even talking about it makes me cringe because it obviously worked to a degree. Don't let Disney trick you, talk about how they could very well lose this battle, give them a fight.

(It was also Disney's Quarter 1 Earnings Call but it's all so coincidentally placed, tell me it doesn't have SOMETHING to do with it. They had to have known it was coming and scheduled around it or even hastily posted the stuff that should stay under wraps)

Don't give in to the shill, resist their corporate branding. I mean how blantant can it be when they flex their companies all over Fortnite, there's literally an island with Marvel, Star Wars, Pixar, Fox, ESPN, their flipping cruise line and Disney+, that's horrifying. How corporate can you get? Even from just a design standpoint and this is coming from a Kingdom Hearts ride-or-die, they actually take care of their worlds and properties that they choose and then incorporate it into a story without trying to straight up market to you, it's that simple, KH fans know that Disney is just the side-piece to an already delicious meal. Fortnite won't be that. It will never be that. I don't care if you can access Disney+ inside a video game to watch with your friends (doesn't that go against what you cracked down on?) I don't care what maps or characters you have and it really goes to show that they don't give a flying f- anymore.

Nintendo wanted Samus in Fortnite as well as Epic Games but Nintendo wanted it exclusive to Switch (which isn't really possible given the nature of the game) but it goes to show that they're picky about what they choose to do and they can be. Back in the day, Kingdom Hearts had to fight to even get Mickey to appear and instead we got a 2 second silhouette and it was awesome. Now they're tossing him out like candy, yeah his copyright basically expired but then we have the violence factor. You shoot people...with guns...in Fortnite. You straight up murder people then dance over their corpses which would've been the pig's behind back then, every news station would be covering it saying that it's trying to corrupt children (those darn video games at it once again) and so Mickey isn't in a fighting game. But here we are. They censored Epic Mickey so that it wouldn't look too scary. But here we are. They've given up, they'll loan out to whoever offers the money because they're weak. I know it's hard but-

Get the old regime out and bring in a new brighter future, one not so corrupted by money and corporate ideals.

[cooloddball]

This is going to be a super long analysis of jib3 starting with the opening ceremony to the closing ceremony so brace yourselves. 

Please note I believe in the breakup theory so maybe my opinion in this one might be biased so please don’t come for me, lol.

I will put it under the cut to avoid overcrowding your dashes with cockles shenanigans. 

Also, watch out for profanities and mature language.

And so it begins...

Opening ceremony

The camera used to record the opening ceremony is shaky. 

Misha, Jason Manns, and Jarpad seem to be having a lot of fun together and Jensen is just looking at his besties talking to the man he loves and he knows he can’t have that so he just stands there looking at them. Poor guy.

Jarpad asks who took Misha’s riffle? Things are awkward, I honestly don’t know what’s going on.

Misha kisses a plushie while making eye contact with Jensen and Jensen is like “oh, oh, wow” while making eye contact with Misha. LOL. Jack help me. This is a lot!!!

Jensen takes a plushie from Sebastian and Jared takes the one Misha had.

Are you guys flirting about trying to see whether you can keep plushies alive?

Misha throws something at the fans, I think he was throwing treats from earlier or whatever it was and Jensen says “Misha is still throwing” I mean why?

Cockles Panel

Jensen is so extra in this panel.

First of all, when he and Misha come out (no pun intended) a song starts playing and he starts dancing. Jensen is usually so poised while dancing but he is over the top throwing his back and shaking his tush for the mish.  I think he was trying a little too hard. Misha spares his ex-boyfriend’s tush a glance smiles and looks away. LOL. The whole thing was cringey, tbh. It was so unlike Jensen.

When Sebastian touches Jensen’s shoulder and says something to Jensen, he [Jensen]  laughs way too hard. I would say he laughs abnormally-it’s loud and he throws his whole body into it like he’s trying to prove what Sebastian was funny and it probably wasn’t. He laughs so hard he ends up right on Misha’s side. and Misha laughs at that though.

Rich says something about something in the sac that hurts(It’s incoherent) and Jensen says it hurts right here pointing at his heart (I can’t hear what they are saying exactly so if anyone knows please let me know)

I don’t know if Mark P. was going to hug Jensen or not or he was pointing at something behind Jensen, but at that moment, Jensen sees Sebastian going to hug Misha and whips his head away from Mark P’s direction so fast he almost broke his neck.

Sebastian humps Misha (these two are so playful I love them) and Jensen is just there acting awkward 

There’s a comment by Rich about “It’s over, the convention’s over I’m no longer your bitch” I don’t know who this is about.

Now, now, now. This whole time Rich is doing a kissy mouth with his fingers on the monitor behind Jensen and Misha. His hand is right where Misha is standing (you’ll understand once you watch it) so Jensen makes a kissy face back and Misha is blushing? Ummm wtf is going on here?

Jensen also does something strange that he never does during cockles panels he pulls his seat away from Misha.

Misha makes a very weird comment about Sebastian’s libido drying up and they have a weird conversation about libido and Viagra ads. It’s weird.

It gets even more awkward Jensen talks about bringing a total stranger, and a blind date. And it goes downhill from there with them. The it wasn’t you it was me speech. It was special. So heartbreaking. It was clearly not about the show but about their relationship. I always have a difficult time getting through that part. It’s so awkward that the fans are just there wondering what the hell is going on.

They decide to take questions and the fan is all over the place so Misha interjects but Jensen won’t let Misha say what he wants to say so he says, “This is why you make it awkward. You never let people finish what they are saying.” Ouch. Domestic dispute vibes anyone?

The way Jensen is looking up at Misha when he’s answering that question. It’s like he wants to sear his face into his memory before they leave Rome.

Jensen is explaining to a fan how one of the four sound stages they had on set was full of furniture and Misha adds “and soiled mattresses”  I mean what was the reason? Did they soil the mattresses with their [redacted]

A fan mentions something about Dean and Cas so these two adorable dorks smile and share a look. Things are starting to look up. Thank Jack.

The fan says something again (I can’t make out what he’s saying) but it must be something nice because they look at each other with smiles on their faces again.

Jensen playing with the head of his microphone. Is it just me or did the temperature rise a notch higher?

The way they look at each other when the fan says to help him choose the hottest female cast member on the show 

Then something freaky happens they say the exact same thing as twins or bffs do sometimes. LOL.

When they start talking about the hot women with the fans Misha moves his entire body and now instead of looking at the fans, he is seated facing Jensen.  The tension is simmering down.

A point to note is that in all their panels they always sit angled facing each other as opposed to facing the crowd save for this panel and DCCON 2019. But for DCCON I can understand that they weren’t comfortable being meant to be a J/2 panel and a creation event. So you know some people in that crowd are super mean to Mish and others to Jensen, so they had to tread carefully. But I digress back to the chaos.

They ask who wants to have a cockles panel the next year and they both raise their hands. I thought that was sweet

 It’s adorable how Jensen keeps repeating everything Misha is saying.

Misha forgets himself and moves too close to Jensen to listen to the song on the phone. Jensen turns to look at Misha, I don’t know what that look is but Misha backs away laughing.

Jensen’s face journey while listening to that song is gold.

Misha moves closer to listen to the song.  I have to say the way they are standing is not usually how two bros listening to music usually stand. If you know what I mean

 Misha agrees that’s definitely Jensen singing. Of course, he knows because Mr. “Jensen sings to me all the time”

He looks so proud of him.  I’d venture to say he’s happy to hear Jensen sing because he has always been so shy about that fact about himself. He even gives him a standing ovation. That’s so adorable. He loves him. My heart.

Jensen is so cute trying to deny it’s not him singing that song.  Yeah, it’s you, Jensen. Even your ex agrees it’s you and we bet he knows how your voice sounds in all kinds of situations ;)

we get a tingly feeling so we know it’s you. Jensen’s adorable smile when Misha says that. Aww.

The way they are not even looking at each other but they are seated the exact same way.

Allow me to explain to my friend here. Explains how his parents didn’t know whether he was a boy or a girl. Misha with the steel chair, “when did they figure out that you were a boy?”

How many years did they call you holly?

For six to seven years

Is it just me or is this conversation a flashback of teenage twink-lesbian Jensen years?

Fan asks whether Dean will ever forgive Cas. Watch Misha’s body language, he is trying to pacify himself by rubbing the back of his neck and fumbling with his shirt.

When Jensen says “ No!” without a moment’s hesitation, Misha looks distraught? I don’t know maybe I’m reading too much into this but I feel like this hit too close to home being that they were most likely broken up.

Misha however has a different opinion, “I think he has” 

Jensen says, “Wishful thinking” and that elicits a smile from Misha.

A fan asks about Dean giving Cas the trenchcoat back and things get interesting.  Weirdly, that Jensen can’t say the word gay out loud. He literally uses the word “unmanly” in its stead in the guise of censorship? It’s not a bad word Jensen you can say it. However, Misha and the fans say the word so I’m wondering who is censoring Jensen’s use of that word. He eventually says it but super fast.

Jensen says that saying “I always knew you would come back” is not something he would say to another human being, especially a man. Jesus, there’s nothing wrong with saying that to another human being you care about. He’s the one making it gay. He was extra when answering that one.

They spent one and half hours making that scene just to end up not saying anything and it ended up looking gay anyway. Anyway, that’s interesting.

 Jensen angles his body towards Mish and says in a very low soft and sexy voice “I guess I really hoped that you would come back some day” I would venture to say that Jensen at the moment in the panel was actually saying them to Misha. Who knows though?

They talk about it a whole lot for something that bothered him that much. 

Misha being so excited about recreating a scene when a fan told Jarpad he’s amazing and Jarpad said "you are welcome. 

 “I think I understand what she wants. I’m not sure what she’s gonna get.” This is a very good line Misha. I will be using it often.

The way they awkwardly stand too close and whisper to each other. Umm…what is going on here?

Jensen folds over laughing because of something Misha says. They are back. The tension is almost 90% gone now and they are in their element.

The chaos of recording the alarm ringtone for the fan was just great to watch. They kept getting closer and closer and I think they might have shared spit at that point. Gross….LOL

The way Misha is sitting is he you know.

Jensen asking Misha whether he was saying anything or just screaming while they were recording. I think he just wanted to see Misha smile.

Jensen’s joy when a fan mentions that they have Misha’s résumé.

Jensen saying the word shit made my day. I curse a  lot and it made me feel validated somehow.

Misha calls him dickhead in return and Jensen stops functioning and laughs instead . He also gets all hot and bothered trying to fumble with the lapel of his shirt.  He does this a lot when he is turned on. He has a humiliation kink I think.

They start talking over each other about Misha’s special skills. Looks like Jensen might have known beforehand because he went straight for that. Or maybe he didn’t know but he knew since Misha is a mad genius there must be some amazing things in there. Either way, it was a good moment.

OMG Jensen is so excited and the way he motions to Misha to bring that résumé to him, LOL. This man was thirsty AF.

He even goes down from the stage to meet Misha and invades his personal space trying to reach the résumé. I think this is the moment the tension between them dissipated completely and they were back to some form of normalcy.

Misha holding Jensen’s shoulder trying to get his résumé back. Unsucessfully, I should add.

They read something funny and they fold over laughing and spin around like overjoyed seals. It is far removed from the mollusk family but at least it’s still a sea creature (I don’t know what I’m saying please don’t mind me)

Jensen is still on his knees laughing and can’t get up. As I said, he is being too extra in this panel.

 Misha is trying to talk but they both can’t stop laughing. I think Jensen laughed so hard he got an extra set of abs that day.

Jensen is still laughing and you know what he is laughing at? Misha’s special skills being acting on camera. I mean it’s funny but man, prayforjensen.

 They are still laughing. Jack, help them.

The way Jensen looks at Misha with pure adoration here makes me so happy and reminds me of the fictional characters they played being all heart eyes for each other.

 Misha laughed so hard he cried.

Jensen trying to read the next ‘special skill’ Misha has but he can’t even talk because of how funny he thinks it is. He’s trying so hard not to laugh but he can’t help himself.

Jensen agreeing and also asking the audience to agree that Misha has a knack for certain accents. Accent kink anyone?

 Jensen is so excited when Misha starts Tibetan throating singing and does the unicorn laugh facing away from the crowd. Bet he has experienced Misha’s Tibetan throat singing skills on a personal when they are (loud overhead helicopter noises followed by thunder rumbling)

Jensen falling to the ground after feigning a heart attack once he saw that Misha is a certified EMT. I mentioned before that I honestly, 100% think he wanted mouth to mouth. There’s no other explanation. He could’ve feigned a nose bleed or just about any other illness but he chose to fall on a dirty floor and lay down so Misha could either give him the breath of life or straddle him. Luckily for him his dream came true 7 years later at Jib9 when straddle gate happened. But I digress

Too bad Misha was still mad at him and heartbroken so he kicked him instead.

Jensen knowing that Misha kayaks seems to be part of his personal knowledge. Maybe they did it together sometimes.

Horseback riding. Hmm is it just me or do they seem awkward here?

 Misha is so close to Jensen’s armpits. Must be missing his man’s musk and being held in those muscular arms again. Poor baby.

Misha can’t talk because of how funny he finds bicycle touring. I mean…I don’t see what’s funny but I guess he knows why it’s funny.

Misha laughing and raises his legs because Jensen is elaborating on the bicycle touring. Maybe it’s an inside joke or maybe it’s no longer funny to me because I’ve watched this panel like 5 times.

 I think Jensen’s goal was to see Misha laugh and be happy because he turned to look at Misha who was still laughing hard and the joy on Jensen’s face. Aww.

Misha gravitating towards his man again. He must smell really nice Misha. And those arms. Bet he used to lift you against the wall and (this fucking thunder won’t stop rambling. Are chuck and Amara fighting again?)

Jensen marketing his man’s carpentry skills but then makes sure to make it ‘no homo’ by saying he would never sit on anything Misha has built. Sure Jan. Then he circles back and says that he knows that he can build things.

Misha walks away from him and he looks up to make sure where he is going. Maybe he was afraid Misha was walking out on him. (PTSD from their breakup?)

They mention acting on camera again.

And laugh 

Jensen keeps talking about the acting on camera and watches to see if Misha is still laughing  He still is and Jensen is happy that his baby is happy. He looks at him again and he is still happy that Misha is still happy. Then once the laughter dies down he starts talking about bicycle touring  and checks again to see if Misha is laughing which he is so Jensen throws his head back  unicorn laughing and then looks at Misha again to see that he’s still laughing. Then they look at each other and say something maybe it’s about that was a good laugh. Jensen is wiping tears from his eyes because of how hard he laughed  Misha does the same. That entire thing was insane and they seemed to love it.

 Jensen starts saying that being this happy or goofing around is how they are on set sometimes and have to take a 5-10 minute break and Misha doesn’t seem too happy at the mention of the set. 

Jensen knowing that you can buy résumés on eBay. Did he buy Misha’s and then plant someone in the audience to bring it up or? Okay, yeah I know I’m reaching here but it’s probable.

 I guess my theory wasn’t farfetched because Jensen says that he’s pretty sure that Jarpad put it on eBay the previous night so maybe he is the one who did all that to win Misha back?

Jensen knows the appellation clogging is a stretch. Seems like Misha has told him about it before.

Jensen looking at his watch to see if they have time for  Misha to be telling a story about his high school sweetheart and now wife. I bet he wishes Misha could tell their love story so openly. He can’t stop looking at Misha.

The way Jensen is looking at Misha here. WTF man? He’s literally confused about what the question is.

The personal space question. This whole thing was just so many things. It was awkward, cringey, thirsty, funny.

when the fan asks whether there’s a funny fact between Jensen and Misha. I almost fainted. What? And Jensen repeats it. The two men are so stoic. They are not even looking at each other. They are looking at the fan like the way a statue stares at you, unmoving. Cringe.

The room is so quiet. Poor girl, I hope she didn’t feel awkward afterwards because if it were me, I would’ve cried from how stoic they looked and how quiet everyone was.

How they both scratch themselves, Misha on the head and Jensen on the nose. Maybe the question hit too close to home

Jensen turns to look at Misha as if to say ’help me out here man. We don’t wanna disappoint our fans.”

Misha gets it because he gets up. This whole thing is gold.

The way Jensen breathes out in anticipation. I know it was like they were playing a skit about personal space but why was he breathing like that? Shouldn’t he have been playing it as ‘uncomfortable’ not ‘turned on.’ Boudoir mannerisms.

Moving on Misha is unsure on where to touch Jensen 40.31. This is weird in and of itself because usually, they don’t have a problem touching each other’s faces, tush, eggplants, (jib4 anyone), backs et cetera. But now it’s weird? *cough* breakup *cough*

Misha touches Jensen’s ear and Jensen literally moans. He frigging moans people. In case it is not clear in the video, here is an isolated audio version of it. Jensen is also fumbling with his shirt like he’s all hot and bothered. Just like Misha did earlier. Was Jib3 their couple’s therapy that reminded them how happy and horny they made each other?

Jensen is really not answering the question, to be honest. He’s fumbling for words and trying so very hard to make sense but his word are  incoherent.

Misha going in for the nose dip. I know friends do this all the time but you have to be very close and familiar with someone such as a friend friend or a sibling for you to poke a finger in their nose. I mean noses are slimy and eww…anyway. That happened. They seem so comfortable with it. Jensen I love you but please stop talking.

The way Jensen looks at Misha. He has the cutest smile on his face as if saying thank you for making that fun and making me horny, I still want you.

Misha wiping his pinky that touched Jensen’s nose on his pants. (I wanted to add something disgusting about what heshould’ve done with that pinky but I won’t so let’s move on)

Jensen wiggling his nose.

When Misha suggests that Spn moves to Nickolodeon. Jensen laughs a bit too hard.

Misha talking about spn being a puppet show reminds me of how he mentioned them having a puppet show in Jensen’s backyard after the show is over.

Jensen also saying that in a way spn is a puppet show. I mean is someone making snide comments about how their strings get pulled and sometimes they are not happy about it. Like how they fired his boyfriend. It seems like it’s an inside joke.

They named the plushie Zippy aww :))

For jack’s sake guys, the way they look at each other when they mention that the  résumé was the highlight of the panel.

Jensen saying the more dirt you dig up on Misha, the more rewarded you are. Aww, someone’s trying to win his man back by any means necessary. You go girl…I mean Jensen.

He talks more about how he’s looking forward to next year when fans have more dirt on his friend Misha. Jensen didn’t want to leave the stage, he was lingering so he could spend more time with Misha.

It’s over guys.

Closing Ceremony

I know you didn’t ask for the closing ceremony but here you go. It’s a free gift.

Can I just mention how Jarpad is an overactive puppy? He has to play with anything and everything he finds.

The mc announces Misha twice for some reason. The second time Jensen looks in Misha’s direction with a small smile on his face. He [Jensen] is also chewing vigorously.

Jensen and Jarpad being typical dude bros and karate chop Rich. This is why the difference between his relationship with Jarpad and Misha stands out. He would be too busy making heart eyes to Misha to kick another guy. LoL.

Jensen hulking out when Jarpad is taking a video of everyone. Lol. This video keeps reiterating my point that his relationship with the two men is just different.

Jensen keeps looking in Misha’s direction, Misha who is busy talking to Steve and having fun. Let me also mention Steve is Jensen’s bestie and so are Jarpad and Misha, but I’m sure that Jensen felt some type of way, jealous when they were having so much fun with his man and he couldn’t. Jarpad also takes a while filming Misha for Jensen of course. They remind me of me having a crush back when I was in school. Wait, did Misha look at Jensen? It’s hard to see because the angle of the video is not expansive but I guess he was.

As soon as Jarpad gets back, Jensen takes the camera from him and starts filming fans. I’m sure he just wanted Misha to look at him

Rich mention’s Misha and something about acting on camera and Jensen licks his lips looking at Misha (I think).

Jensen then vigorously grabs the microphone from someone immediately and mention’s Misha. Jarpad’s reaction at that moment tells you everything you need to know about what’s going on between Jensen and Misha. It looks like he is pleading with Jensen in his head saying, “Don’t embarrass yourself bro. Please don’t” but it’s too late.

Jensen again talks about Misha’s résumé and specifically about acting on camera, the thing that made Misha laugh out loud during their panel. Someone’s smitten. Defending his ex-man.

Jarpad goes to whisper something to Misha. And they laugh while Jensen is thanking the jib staff for doing an amazing job. But when he sees the duo laughing, he loses track of thought and says “and they are all getting married”  dude what ??? How do you go from thanking people who worked on the convention and in .1 seconds you are talking about they are all getting married? Who is? Are you okay? Do you need to sit down? No one gets it, he says he’s kidding and gives Jarpad the microphone, spares a glance at Misha and he seems distraught from that moment on. I wish I could see Misha’s face through all this.

He’s glancing in Misha’s direction again. Man’s got it bad. What?! Oh to be loved by Jensen Ackles. Misha must be a prize, I know he is a mad genius and gorgeous and sexy as hell with that golden skin that looks like it was dipped in gold and honey, big blue eyes that are bluer than the bluest blue, but Jensen wtf man? You are in public.

 I think Jarpad is telling Jensen something maybe it has to do with what he and Misha were talking about earlier?

And it’s over people.

Overall, I agree with the breakup theory. I mean the way these two were acting around each other was very strange. If you watch Misha and Jarpad, they seem okay from the opening ceremony up till the end but Jensen and Misha are just being weird.

The panel was mostly fun but their body language told a story that something was definitely going on between them. 

@littlewolf2703

[hacked-by-jake]

Take you home ²

𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞...

>𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝟷

Summary: Jake can’t accept that this has been done to you, the thought torments him, and all he wants is revenge, and he gets it.

Words: 4,2k

Genre: Angst / Fluff

Warnings: Swearing, insulting

A/n: Well, hi.

So, this one has taken on some dimensions again, they weren’t planned, about 3k. Now, it is a bit more. Actually, the whole thing should not be quite so extensive, but well, once Jake starts, he doesn’t stop.

Thank you alls so much for the support in part one, I was really surprised. And thank you very much for wishing Part Two, which means a lot to me. ❤️

So, that’s a bit more related to alternative two of part one. Actually, it was supposed to get a little darker and generally the plan was different. The ending should be different and longer, but I think it’s good as it is now.

I hope you’ll like it.

And apologize for the mistakes.

(I think I wanted to say more but I forgot xD)

Anyway, have fun, stay healthy and take care of yourselves.❤️🌹🎭

There lies the hacker now, in the early morning hours, not even the sun has risen already, wide awake, full of emotions and agitated.

In his arms, you, fortunately asleep, deep and firm.

He also wanted to sleep, he has been trying for two hours but it doesn’t work. And how should he? After the past hours it is practically impossible to sleep.

The only reason you sleep is probably the effort you had to experience. Your body was finished after the shower. You were still shivering from the adrenaline, agitated and yet so terribly tired.

So now he lies here, doesn’t know what to do with himself, doesn’t know how to react, how to feel. TThe pure fear that lay in your voice when the call came suddenly, gives him goose bumps again, crawling all over his body.

This fearful tone of your voice won’t let it go.

What if he hadn’t been there in time? If he hadn’t been able to save you in time? If it took him a minute longer? If something had gone wrong?

He can’t even imagine what could have happened. At this horrible imagination in his head, he pinches his eyes tightly. Try to remove the images from his head that make him sick, he would like to vomit, so horrible is the thought of it. He shakes his head, tries to drive away the thoughts, but they don’t go away. His fingernails drill deep and firmly into the skin of his palms. It hurts, it’s uncomfortable, and if he still squeezes even harder, he’ll start bleeding, but he has no control over it. In his mind, the worst scenarios circle and he can only imagine, if even he feel so bad now, how bad did you feel in this moment?

He controls himself to be quiet, exhorts himself to loosen up again so as not to wake you. You need sleep. You deserve sleep. But these pictures, these fucking pictures, they're not going away. The imagination that someone would touch you- NO!

The hacker opens his eyes wide! He must not go in this direction, he must look straight out and make sure that you get your revenge, as you deserve! That he protects your honor, that he makes everyone see what happens when someone wants to do something bad to you.

He’s Jake, one of the best hackers in the world and now he’s gonna show what he’s capable of.

-

His breath is so heavy, so full of anger and hatred, so full of negativity that he would like to hit the next wall.

He bites his lower lip when he thinks about leaving you here alone. He needs to be in his study. He just has to find out who this guy was. That bastard.

Just really reluctant, actually he would just like to lie here with you, but he has to, he's winds cautiously out of your embrace.

He can’t lie here and wait, he has to do something. Now!

Even if he feels weird with it, he opens the laptop that is in his bedroom and directs it so that he can see your sleeping shape. He will simply connect the laptop to his PC to keep an eye on you. As soon as you get restless or wake up, he could be with you right away.

That’s how he’s gonna do it.

He gives you a final and gentle kiss on the forehead before going to his study.

-

After he has prepared his work setup and everything is ready, he wastes no time and immediately gets to work. Quickly scan the data of the man who was tracking you.

Everything that had ever happened in his life, the hacker would find out now. And of course, the most important information is quickly obtained.

Name

Age

Date of birth

Address

All bank accounts

His social security number

Where he grew up

As what he works

What friends he has

With whom he is friends

His pets

On what elementary school he went

On what high school he went

Who his parents are

The siblings

All information about each individual family member

And at the very end, the police certificate of conduct with all the information who are important for him. And that’s more interesting than he thought. The further he read the information from the police, the more his emotional state changes.

It starts with drug abuse

Bodily injury in two cases

Insult

Gun possession

Domestic violence against his ex girlfriend

....

The list is shockingly long: a two-year stay in a prison, probation and community service.

The further Jake read, the more worried he is that he couldn’t have been there in time with bad luck. But he’s all the happier he could save you.

At the same time, he’s thinking about telling you who the guy is, because he doesn’t know how you’re gonna take this information. But he would worry more about that later.

As he glances at the laptop’s camera, a smile creeps up on his lips. Meanwhile, you are lying on his side of the bed, your arms are tightly wrapped around his pillow and your head is pressing into the soft fabric, as if you were looking for his proximity in your sleep.

How perfect can a person be? How perfect is this beautiful being lying in his bed? Immediately the tingling starts in his stomach, as always when it comes to you.

He’s so terribly in love. So insanely strong.

Again, he begins to regret that it has not progressed further between you. Everyone knows that he loves you, and everyone knows that you love him. And yet you both have not yet managed to finally do what you both so much want. But the fear of destroying everything is so great. You two spend so much time with each other, become best friends, best friends who feel more for each other than just friendship.

In addition, his fear of putting you in danger is added. He is not a simple man, no one who prefers a regular daily life, no fixed working hours, no fixed income, even if he earns more than most others. As a hacker you have one or the other possibility. Nevertheless, he is still wanted by the government. Not as strong, and the danger is not as great as it was a few months ago, but it still exists.

But last night’s incident somehow inspired him to think, and he feels different when he thinks about it. He wants you, he wants you with everything you have, he wants you by his side. He always wants to protect you, he always wants to be there for you, he wants you by his side, he doesn’t want to live alone in this apartment anymore. He doesn’t want to be alone anymore, he needs you, he has always done it and he will always need you, he wants you so bad!

This incident clearly shows that life is always uncertain, and this incident shows him that he is lying to himself. He wants to be able to say that you’re a couple, he wants it so badly. So fucking urgent.

"I want to share my life with you," the hacker murmurs, driving through his face with his hands. Now his thoughts have drifted in another direction again, but you’re just sitting in every corner of his mind. You are the biggest and most important part of his life and that since the first time you met.

But now something else is more important. After that, he can think of you a lot, but now revenge counts.

He breathes in and out again before turning back to the screens and begins to gather more information.

-

About half an hour later, he releases himself from his cramped posture. The further he delves into the life of the man, the more aggressive he becomes.

This guy’s not a petty criminal, the way he thought he was, this guy’s got dirt on him through and through.

And the further he reads, the more he wonders why this guy is on the loose and not in a maximum security prison.

From organized crime to gang activities. Drug dealing, counterfeit money, prositution. All the shit every gang is involved in.

Disgusting chat histories, images, threats of other people, extort protection money. And the hacker just assumed the guy is just a disgusting bastard. But he thought wrong.

And yet, it’s actually only good for him, really very good, because Jake has now a lot more options than he thought.

He thinks hard about how to proceed. How best to tackle this whole situation, so that he has the best chance of success.

But what’s also positive for is the fact that this guy really doesn’t deserve anything other than what the hacker’s up to.

To destroy a person’s whole life is actually nothing that he would do; he simply cannot reconcile this with his morality. Even if it’s about you, but now he’s not just doing it for you, he’s doing it for everyone. This is a favor he does to the whole society.

Oh and he’ll do it with pleasure.

-

Meanwhile, he has gained access to the man’s laptop and can take a closer look at the living room. He also got lucky and found some camera shots taken by a bakery that is on the street where you were being followed.

Unfortunately, it has no sound and yet it is more than enough. He saved the recording and censored you on it.You don’t have to be broadcast in video format all over the world.

But it is still clear that he's persecutes you. It is more bad than quite recognizable on the videos that he is angry and that he shouts something, but when you see the video, everything is explained by itself.

That was number one on his list.

Let's continue with point two.

And point two is a summary of all the information he could find that could even remotely involve anything criminal.

And this is a really long list, he can prove everything, he can prove every single point. With all the information that will help.

Videos, chats, pictures, recording of conversations. Locations, meeting places, other names.

Because his plan has changed, and it’s not just about destroying this man anymore, it’s about destroying all the criminals around him.

-

Point two, finish! Now, point three, and that’s the confrontation with the man.

The most important information is in front of him as he puts on his headset and leans back relaxed.

The recording program runs as soon as he turns on his microphone. The recording is automatically converted into the computer voice and then sent as a video along with his sign, the eye, as a gift to his new friend.

He puts one leg over the other and folds his arms in front of his chest.

"Hello Ted, my identity doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you’ve made some serious mistakes, and about this, I will teach you now."

-

And send.

Soon the man’s cell phone will start ringing, and it will only stop when he gets up and then listens to the hacker’s nice message on his laptop, which will breaking his little world in which he lives.

But it’s his own fault.

A look at the camera of his own laptop tells him that you still sleep quietly and calmly, which makes him happy. -

The ringing of the mobile phone and the terrible ringtone of the persecutor annoy the hacker so slowly. He didn’t think it would be that long before Ted wake up. But when it finally happens and a door is opened, a slightly arrogant grin appears on Jake’s face.

It’s Showtime.

"What the hell?" grumbles the sleepy guy as Jake makes the video file pop up.

The eye flickers on the screen and Ted skeptically approaches it.

He pulls back his desk chair and sits down.

"What the fuck?" he hisses angrily and pushes a button on the keyboard.

"Hello Ted, my identity doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you’ve made some serious mistakes, and about this, I will teach you now."

Amused and eager, Jake follows the course of the situation.

Ted becomes more and more hectic, the more facts the computer voice enumerates. He probably didn’t expect this to ever come to light. He wildly presses all the buttons he can find, tries to turn off the laptop but he has absolutely no control over it.

At the very end, after all the crimes have been enumerated, the computer voice informs him that he has video footage of his nocturnal activity.

"That was a big mistake, Ted, and it’s time you understood that you understand how unimportant you are in this world"

-

After Jake has decided to leave Ted alone, with the knowing that he can now say goodbye to his life as he knows it, he move on to point 4.

And point 4 involves sending all the information to everyone who can do something with it. But don't worry, that’s not the finale.

The finale will be something special.

Everything collected is sent first to the police in Duskwood. He doesn’t think much will happen, but the police will certainly not be the agency that will take care of Ted, in the end.

After the police, Jake sends the information to his place of work. He won’t be needing the job in a few hours anyway even longer.

Then his sister gets an e-mail with everything there is about her brother. Because Jake found out that poor girl always had to take care of him. Had to pick him out of the cell at night, had to pick him up of the hospital one or the other time and things like that. Among other things, good Ted broke into her apartment once, but this was not reported to the police. Jake saw in a chat that Ted promised to stop doing criminal things. This didn’t work out that way. The hacker feel sorry for the sister, she certainly doesn’t deserve it and yet this is about more than just that.

And after all the important people have received the information, he finally go to the final, which the hacker is most looking forward to before he can finally return to you.

Back to you, to his bed where you lie, this day can’t be more beautiful, can it?

Well, the morning show on TV sounds good, doesn’t it? The channel is littered with scandals and really unscrupulous means of getting attention.

No one will be angry with him if the actual broadcast is interrupted for a few minutes to do something good. And to appease his vengeance. All he has to do is fade in everything, play the video and the rest would come by itself. The spread on the Internet. The information is forwarded to other authorities like the State Police Authorities as it is about more than just the pursuit after revenge for his love. Gang crime is not liked by the state.

So then, curtain up, the final begins.

-

About half an hour later, now it is shortly before 9  in the morning, the whole took longer than he had expected, he sinks back on the soft mattress. Satisfaction spreads and seeing you sleep so peacefully also makes him tired.

Carefully he pulls the blanket over himself and then grabs again around your body to bring you back into his arms. He hides his head in your neck bend and a few moments he falls asleep with a smile on his face.

He couldn’t stop himself from posting some things on Ted’s Instagram page for his personal feeling. Pictures that Ted prefers not to watch for the Internet, but Jake doesn’t care; in a few hours, Ted will never have access to the Internet again. Hopefully Ted makes friends in prison fast, or it won’t be so funny for him.

Well, don’t mess with the hacker’s love.

----------

When you open your eyes, Jake still lies peacefully asleep beside you.

His hair stands wildly off his head and he has put his arms protective around you. Immediately a feeling of home spreads within you and you smile.

His body nestles warm against yours and you wish you could always wake up like that.

Bu, if you didn’t have to use the bathroom.

Carefully peel out from under his arms without waking him.

With leaving Jake’s arms and getting out of bed, the first pictures of last night immediately come back into your head. A few moments you stare at the wall before you shake your head. You don’t want to think about it. Actually, you never want to have to think about it again, you just want to forget it, focus on everything that’s more important now. And this is you, your feeling that you don’t want to get involved in this situation, you don’t want to leave room for this man. You don’t want him to have room in your life, and you don’t want to investigate any further. Actually, you don’t want to know who this guy is. You just want to focus on how lucky you were, that everything went well, that Jake saved you, and that nothing happened to you.

Jake!

You want to focus on Jake! And most importantly, that you finally want to be with him! He was there to save you right away. He was ready to help you immediately, he protected you, especially the way he protected you. The way he sounded, as if he was doing everything he could to save you. And this irrational fear that this could not work with you two, it’s bullshit! You want him with everything he has and you don’t want to be just friends anymore. You long for his lips, for his kisses that don’t just go on your forehead or cheek. You want to finally be able to say that you are a couple, you want him so badly, so damn badly.

Like a miracle cure, the thought of Jake really distracts you. You didn’t even know where your thoughts went, it just happened. But it always is, it’s just in every corner of your mind.

-

After you left the bathroom, you turned on the coffee machine. You’d stay awake and pass the time until Jake wakes up and you could have some breakfast. While the coffee is cooking, you drop down on the small sofa in the hacker’s living room and decide to pass the time with a little bit TV.

You switch through the channels looking for something interesting but don’t really find something you like.

When the Coffee machine gives you confirmation that the hot drink is ready, you quickly jump up and leave the remote control there.

While you prepare your coffee, you listen to an advertisement about an electronic toothbrush and then one about the latest vacuum cleaner.

With your cup you go back and then put a thin blanket from the sofa around your legs.

The News Show that you sometimes see starts broadcasting.

And you really expected a lot, really a lot, but you never expected what was actually going on.

While the news announcer reports on a gang crime, a picture is displayed. There’s a man to be seen, and you’re a thousand percent sure that’s the man who chased you yesterday.

Silently and with your mouth open you are listening as a whole gang was arrested, warehouses and factories were stormed. Drugs and counterfeit money were confiscated and in the end, how a hacker uncovered all this.

During the narration about hacking another channel and the materials shown there such as images and video, your heart begins to beat faster and faster.

And when it is shown what was published there, you put your hand infront your mouth in shock.

"Oh my-" you watch the camera shots where you can clearly see the street, which is only a few streets away from your apartment.

And then you see a censored shadow running, a few moments later a man.

You and the man who was now identified as Ted.

Jake.

That was Jake, you know it!

You don’t know how to react. While the pictures and videos scare you, since this man met you yesterday, you feel moved to tears on the other side. When the hell did he do that?

Did he do it because of you?

Where does he get so much information? Sure, he’s a hacker but THAT?

When the news anchor finally ends her post with the words "This man will probably never see the light of day again" and "The whole Internet speaks about this man and the victim who was persecuted by him. When you see this, we wish you all well!"

You have the feeling that you are breathing again for the first time. Like you’ve been holding your breath all this time without noticing.

You stutter at things, try to explain, sort out and understand your feelings. But somehow, just like last night, it’s too unreal.

"You shouldn’t know that in this way"

Startled you turn around as Jake’s sleepy voice appears behind you.

He's leaning in the door frame and yawns once.

With an open mouth you stare at him, "Did you-?" but you break off immediately because you have no idea what to say.

"Is everything okay? Shouldn’t I have do that? I wanted to tell you myself but now it’s too late. I wanted to teach you gently," explains the hacker, and his gaze slowly turns into a worried one.

"Did you- I mean- you were -" you stutter, can’t bring out a normal sentence. Point you to the TV, to you and back to Jake.

"I’m sorry, MC, I didn’t mean to hurt you or anything," he explains straight away." It was just, I don’t know, I was so mad! I still am! This disgusting bastard was following you, he-"quickly breaks off. His hands are clenched into fists, his eyebrows pulled together and his breath accelerated. However, he doesn’t want to remind you unnecessarily, even if that didn’t work out so well through the news. He really has to hold back from screaming completely and somehow making sure that Ted gets more than what he already has.

"No Jake, I-I" you just can’t find the right words and before you know it, you threw yourself awkwardly over the sofa, rolled over it and stood two steps later directly in front of Jake. Without control, you reach into his neck with one hand and pull his head down towards you. Not quite gently your lips hit on his.

And just as quickly as the kiss came about, you finish it as quickly.

"Oh, um, I... so.. I-" you laugh nervously, still holding his head. "Um, sorry?"

Jake also laughs nervously.

"I shouldn’t have done that," a little embarrassed, you let go of his neck and kick a few steps away from him.

"No, no, everything was fine, I thought it was great, so I mean-" a slight redness adorns Jake’s cheeks.

"Sorry" you mumble with a much too high voice and try yourself on a grin that probably looks like you’re in pain. Jake makes an waving off hand move, then it’s quiet between you for a moment. You chew on the inside of your cheek and let your foot slide across the floor in a semicircle, "Did you..- Did you say you thought it was great?" You ask as unimpressed as possible, as if it were a question about the weather.

Jake’s eyes grow big, "Did you find it bad?"

"No, no, of course not!" you assure him quickly." It was great, I would do it again and again."

You sigh.

Smiling, you put one hand to your forehead and look back at the hacker. Jake smiles too, and then you start laughing out loud. Until you have to hold your stomach and the first tears run out of your eyes.

"We’re so ridiculous," you chuckle, shaking your head over you two.

"Do you think?" Jake asks, grinning, "I find us great together"

"Me too" you agree and look back at him.

"Jake I-"

"MC I-"

At the same time you start to speak and then both of you are immediately silent to let the other go first.

"Do you first" you offer and he returns it to you.

"No, I’m fine, say what you wanted to say," you confirm.

"I can wait, you start"

You’re twisting her eyes again.

However, Jake understands this wrong and at the same time the magic words leave your lips "I love you"

Masterlist

-

And thank you @a-d-alison your submission gave me a lot of motivation🤭❤️

-

[shy-bee]

ReignBot Japanese Mockumetry

03:00 yeah i think i definitely missed something 

03:23 hahaha ‘lackluster narration’

05:27 mhm, also noted! if i remember to watch that 😭

05:30 ah!! it’s set in 2009! oof my bad lmao

05:46 that is a nice detail, since they are filming in a house they can’t just make a room bigger to accommodate a camera crew, so it’s very personable (if that’s the right word?) in each other’s space, breathing down each other’s necks.

07:04 yeah i did think it odd but yeah you didn’t have to think about it for too long… 45-25=20. eh the mother was at an okay age, not a concerningly young!

08:26 yikes! still spooked me now

09:42 i saw the shrine too! but i thought is was for the husband, but now i know i was wrong

15:28 oh she is 22! i thought that was a fake age… why did i think she was 25..???? i’m so confused

15:56 still wonder why he brought the bag in with him :/

16:52 kinda funny has they censored the head injury but not the website

18:01 ah! i didn’t even notice that was what that frame was showing… oops

18:58 yeah.. thought as much

19:22 ah!! that makes sense as to why she was able to get back! i must’ve missed that too

19:58 eh, i saw that too, that the family was helping him more there. ah! makes sense. i was too wrapped up him him being the bad guy i didn’t see people’s opinion of him change since i was the problem…. oof

20:54 i do wonder what the other papers mean

and i found that scene weird, the cameraman is just lingering filming. it’s just odd, i know it’s probably for the movie, but if it were more real maybe one would start recording half way through the shout? aiy what do i know?

21:14 oh fking hell! harsh words mother!

22:25 i thought it was weird! and creepy

22:58 why tf are there more knives in the fruits?? what did they do to you?? QAQ

23:52 hahahaha, wait what where supposedly doing, kissing right? i thought i heard them kiss

28:33 hehe still made me chuckle

30:40 i thought he was dead in that room tbh 😅… too much true crime

34:38 … i feel like i should’ve probably just watch the first youtube video and not make a 1 1/2 hour long video double it length with me pausing so often 😭

35:40 ah! the mother!! 👀☕️ go on

36:19 oh… did… did the mother kill the cat? *LE GASP* like she killed the chicken because it went into her garden??

37:53 ah… why did i think the mother to be… i have issues let’s just move on ha…ha

39:06 ah… is the mum trying to get them to have false memories about what happened?

39:20 AH!!! I SEE! taht explains why he was looking over so much?

39:51 omfg that one scared me. chills ewh

40:03 so it was a read hearing? she brought it up because her son brought it up?

40:25 oh wait pffft that’s another daughter! so this is what she got them to talk about? the photo to distract people from what actually happened?

40:50 me either sister! me either brother! creepy!!

42:25 ah creepy! did the mum push him? but nice work cameraman to make that camera angle make sense!!

43:33 ah! all in the fruits! i see! that is a good what time show that! the fruits as the kids!! mhm mhm

43:52 Ringo sweetie what are you doing?

wait Ringo was the first to call him father and that, could she be on the mothers side. to stay on this land so no one finds the dead husband under the plants, and that’s why the plants are so healthy because they have good nutrients… was she slowly poisoning her husband… no her daughter wasn’t a nurse then… i’ll continue watching sorry!

43:58 i did think that might be poison but she quickly had some herself so i disregard that

44:16 wait maybe it is. and in small bits it’s okay but after time and you eat more it slowly but surly clogs up and builds up to a life ending amount? the look Ringo gave the mother was a but sus (at 44:13)

44:56 same same!

46:05 when i heard the lady say their family name at the end i did like that it did sound like that but i didn’t want to be ‘that guy’ but say that now sounds dumb

47:11 i’ll have a snoop too to see if there are any more translations for the other signs! 🫡

48:16 thank you! i don’t feel as bad now!

48:27 i also thought that *cough*

49:16 yes yes detective! tell us your theories!!

49:42 hmmm i see, you’re cooking, continue

50:28 yeah, figured as much

50:56 wait-!! omfg!!! ah! that’s so cool!! that cat 😌🤍

that makes it feel so real!!

51:01 :000 oh my go-

good watch good watch!! thank you

saiko family

notes - to keep track

father Sumio 39 <- stepfather

previous husband Ura (went missing)

mother Tsukasa 45

2 daughter Mikan 24 (works as a nurse)

2 son Ryuta 17

^poured food on Sumio’s face

^probably into something pervert (prediction had before 20:20)

3 daughter Rie 16

^beats up Sumio

4 daughter Remon 13

4 son Dan 12

5 daughter Sumomo 6 (Sumio’s)

5 son Raichi 5 (Sumio’s)

(prediction at 10:28 the new husband killed the first husband and forced his way into the family)

(prediction at 13:28 the not-husband-husband does something creepy behind close doors that it creeps the children out but they can’t say. the mother can’t say any since she needs his help to pay for the kids)

1 son Gouki 23

(prediction at 15:04 something sus is up with the 1st son. maybe possessed, is the ‘real’ man of the house that the younger ones look up to)

???? Ringo

^maybe the oldest sister? she’s ‘missing’

1 daughter Ringo 25

^left hole after graduating from high school to go to university

^found work in Tokyo (3 years ago)

^stop contact 6 months ago

^she was against the marriage

^maybe works at a brothel (22:26)

(prediction at 22:56 Sumio probably did something to the oldest daughter so she runs away from home to get away from him, traumatised. he -Sumio- gets caught on a ‘dirty’ site and pretends it’s a lead on the oldest daughter)

(24:50 i don’t want to watch this 😭😭😭 this is so weird!! why would you book a from, at a brothel house, with your supposed daughter??? that’s so wrong, if you where worried try contacting the place or wait until her shift is over and try to talk to her!! don’t book an appointment!! 🤢🤢🤢!!!!)

(26:02 this is so awkward i wanna die, what the hell 🤢)

(prediction at 33:16 is he going g to slowly ‘kill’ off the other kids until is only his two kids?)

(prediction at 35:24 he hurt the 2nd son you be able to get the 1st daughter back)

Ringo

^got scammed into the industry

(prediction at 38:58 he’ll kill the boyfriend to bring her home?)

(40:46 i hope they expect her!! QAQ!!)

(41:41 please give her a hug!!! QAQ)

(43:56 …… no surprised)

(46:48 .. somethings fishy..)

(prediction at 46:50 i don’t think the mother wanted the marriage, maybe she agreed because or the film crew… she doesn’t seem happy, or he told her to shut up and stop talking)

(46:51 … or am i being too harsh on him. sure going to a brothel to see you step daughter is weird, very weird, but maybe he’s a good person….? we’ll see)

(48:54 not cookie… oh gosh, don’t say that infront of the kids, when they’re eating!! 😭)

(49:49 reminds me of that case where everyone was scared/revered the oldest daughter and they turned a blind eye to her madness and even put lotion in her even after she died)

(50:30 not the children crying 😭😭😭���!! what a background noise to see hands gently caring for the planets!)

(52:14 aren’t you over spraying that plant?)

(54:14 did his tell his wife that? was he hoping the 3rd to leave? you just got back the eldest why ask is they want to leave?)

(prediction 54:56 the 3rd daughter is possessed)

(prediction at 55:22 or the oldest son?)

(prediction at 55:38 maybe something bad happens every year? like a once a year curse? but the children brought up a ghost so i don’t know what specifically it is)

3rd Son with first husband Tuakaharu (don’t know if i spelt that right) died at the age 9 (in 2001, don’t know when this is set but was made published on youtube in 2015 so give or take a year)

(57:16 oh sh!t i think it is something once a year!)

2001 - son dies

2002 - husband goes missing

???? - Ringo being tricked

???? - Gouki’s mental state

???? - Rie’s hostility/domestic violence

???? - Remon’s (?) bike accident

^one year the cat dies

Present - Ryuta’s fall from roof

(01:01:32 maybe the photo he wanted was the ‘ghost’ photo? he seems to be more down on the ground about that’s possible)

(01:01:46 oh!! maybe the head injury ‘cleared’ his head so he can think more clearly?)

(01:02:24 a g-g-g-ga-ghost! hahahaha… sorry)

(01:02:28 hopefully we can see the photo, or the spooky of the ‘unknown’ is scarier. allowing us to imagine what scary thing is shown in the image, because everyone has different tolerances to different things)

(01:02:40 never-mind 😭 spoke too soon!)

(01:02:46 pffftttt! hahahahaha, hahahahahahahahaha!!! thanks to that zoom hahhahaha i thought it was a normal photo pffft so thanks! hahahaha)

(01:03:00 oh lord she’s become a ghost hunter hahaha! with that look maybe she’s the one behind it! hahaha! her voice suits the lazy fill of how this documentary would’ve been made if it where a real one!

… i fill a bit bad. i keep pausing to type, it’s probably keeping from getting sucked into the story! sorry! but i’m going to continue doing this!)

(01:03:08 burn the photo?)

(01:93:14 hahahhaahahahHahahHhHhhaahahah a omfg hahahahahahaha)

(01:04:48 a nice homely vide it wraps you up in a nice warm blanket!)

(01:05:44 hehehe sneaky cameraman!)

(01:06:18 👀☕️)

(01:07:08 it is nice to see that the children are more happy! but i have a feeling Rie is about to rock the boat. maybe the older siblings have a plan or something to mess with the new dad?)

(01:07:30 … what a waste of food. and i was right)

(01:08:02 i feel like i shouldn’t be watching this…

since it’s real acting though these fight seems are a bit funny looking since the kicks/punches look weak but the father is good at acting hurt)

(01:08:37 EYH!! oh my… that one he definitely didn’t actually touch her, but still bloody hell!)

(01:09:12 …pfft… sorry i just can’t help but think about the cameraman standing up close a personal at this scene through his camera lens being like ‘good sh!t’ while his face stays in moved)

(01:09:22 …hmmm oof line… i’ll keep watching but i do think this father isn’t as innocent as he seems)

(01:09:44 …. now i feel bad QAQ)

(01:11:00 how much do you how much do you bet that she’s gone missing just poped out from existence like the father?)

(01:11:18 maybe call the police or something?)

(01:12:28 don’t push her of the bridge! don’t! i see you! don’t you dare!)

(01:012:40 i was about to say you don’t need to apologise… but they both should really, neither are really in the right here.)

(01:13:18 wow “you are… Nothing.” wow! i should get that tattooed one me pffft)

(01:14:09 what does this mean?)

(01:14:30 (?) good question)

(01:16:22 awh 😭😭😭)

(01:17:50 i guess she needed the slap of reality? there is still 20 minutes so i’m uneasy)

(01:18:14 MISS!!! it’s not you place! it’s bad enough you’ve filmed all of this, don’t poke your nose into who’s calling who father!!)

(01:19:04 with what money??? you can afford a house but a nice van for a camping trip??

what are you kidnapping them???)

(01:19:22 oh my! that sure was a jump-scare!! was not expecting to see him outside of that room!)

(01:19:30 … wait why does he has his bat with him? does it bring him comfort after facing a traumatic experience so he brings it around with him to feel safe? i don’t know… i feel uneasy again, sorry big brother!)

(01:20:07 so cute!!! heart is melting!!!)

(01:20:28 eh! put both poles in before you bend it! you’re making it harder for yourselves!!)

(01:21:56 omfg lady!! don’t ask such a question! they are two different people, two different fathers! they’d be different so don’t compare them! ehy!

before she asked that though it’s nice to see the children except him! they have seen him put his foot down, so i can see how that gave them some reassurance!)

(01:22:20 awh her smile!! QAQ!!! so precious!)

…. that poor gosh!! 🤢😭 sorry had to skip that

(01:23:24 awh..! to have them all day that T^T i’m not crying you are!)

(01:23:42 pfffft hahahaha then it just pans to her awkwardly/creepily watching from a distance… ha…

maybe she should had a series where she stays with a family for a month and buy the end of the month they are all sawn together with her magic hands)

hehehe!! ✨fire✨

(01:24:08 are they really a family? i feel after all this they’ll be close together and have a bond no? a bit like the weasley family. to act like a family for so long you’d have an emotional connection to them so maybe the joy they’re showing is real?)

tbh i thought the announcement was going to be another child lmao

(01:24:24 maybe the oldest son did have something happen, the way he’s acting makes me think maybe he has something, not in like a mean/bad way.

it nice that he’s being included into the family’s things now :D)

(01:24:55 protect the fire from the rain QAQ)

(01:25:33 i wonder if they planned the weather)

(01:26:15 oh gosh 😭😭😭😭 so precious)

(01:26:27 why am i waving goodbye?)

(01:27:40 what’s going on??)

(01:27:55 oooo that neat! to have the ‘open door’ button on the floor, stops the germs from getting in the hands!

but what about escapees who scroll on the floor and people with no legs/in a wheelchair)

(01:28:30 …. that sight brings back memories)

(01:29:24 … sus … did he push her down so he could get her and her husbands life insurance?)

(01:31:26 maybe that was the ghosts plan, to now keep sending you to the hospital to make you stay in the house. the injuries becoming -worse?- so it’s gets more power and causes you to stay longer and it continues)

(01:31:51 ah! the eldest boy! eating with the family! very proud!)

(01:33:02 awh he’s also out there with the father!

i’m just worried the reason why i watched this was because another youtube video said that there was horror, or something like that and to watch it before the video, maybe i missed something in all this.. if so, oof!)

(01:33:19 pffft nothing to the actor, her dead eyes as selling this… well

01:33:22-24 i guess you could say there is warmth her looking at a family endearingly)

(01:33:28 the deadpan voice- so i’ve tried not to talk about it much- pffft-)

[sepublic]

Through the Looking Glass Ruins!!!!!

         …

         SO! Onto other things first…

         WRATH IS BRAXAS’ FATHER!??!!? HOLY SHIT, Wrath is a canonical dad, I’d always expressed my… OH MY GOD WRATH IS DAD! And of BRAXAS, that sweetie… How is Braxas such a sweetie with a father like HIM, also-

         Wrath was in casual wear? Either he has a day off, or he got fired by Belos/Kikimora after drawing Luz a map to Eda in Young Blood, Old Souls! Either way this guy has a sudden new level of NUANCE that I am reeling from, and yes I checked, that really is Wrath according to the credits! Dang this puts everything in a WHOLE new light…!

         AMITY HAIR OHMIGOD IT LOOKS SO ADORABLE SHE’S SELF-ACTUALIZING I AM FUCKING SCREAMING HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, it’s PINK and not green… They acknowledged it, Emira did! And they CHANGED IT I AM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND OVER THIS-

         She looks so BEAUTIFUL and I love the kind of foreshadowing with the bookends of our first shot of Amity having her hair down, and now it’s changed! And she looks adorable and EMIRA AND EDRIC BEING GREAT SIBLINGS I LOVE IT SO MUCH! This… THIS is everything I wanted! I was resigned to not much of them but HELL YEAH they’re being good siblings and we get a look at their rooms, we see them doing MAKEOVERS together this is everything from my favorite fanon content and MORE,

         Also Edric has a date?! Emira says ‘their’ mom… Unless the Golden Guard has a mom, DARN! Not gonna lie, I half-expected a big twist at the end that Edric was dating the Golden Guard, who was doing some sort of reconnaissance as his unrecognized normal self and/or screwing around with the Blights even further, but in a GENUINE sense… But then who knows Kikimora could be posing as GG’s ‘mom’, this is a stretch anyhow-

         JUST HELL YEAH Blight Twins! Blight Twins being sweet and mischievous and supportive of each other, Blight SIBLINGS being siblings, Emira being an older sister and giving advice! And AMITY, Amity mentioning how much Luz has changed stuff, I love that they acknowledge it openly how her life has completely shifted, and now… NOW…!

         No necklace! Red leggings! PINK HAIR?! Is this why Amity in the intro hasn’t been updated yet… She was getting TWO updates, so the animators decided to only animate a change after this final update?!

         King and Gus are also friends it seems, and they even recorded some fun together! I’m surprised at how much Bria and the others mock Gus’ illusion skills… Obviously Belos is kinda terrible but like; I don’t think he’d set aside an entire subset of magic into Illusions without reason! Also that nightmare trip… I LOVE IT, I love Gus applying the creativity of illusions in their ability to completely warp and distort someone’s sense of reality! And I called that dragon-thing being an illusion!

         A graveyard… I wonder if the Gallderstones (is that how it’s spelled) have any relevance or if they’re just neat? I hope Mattholomule and Gus help hide the Looking Glass Graveyard… Damn, that’s another Death reference with Gus, huh! Is it culminating in his respect for the dead, or will it continue further with Gus being a necromancer, or an Oracle who can commune with the deceased, and he has their respect as someone who treats them properly?!

         Also not to get dark but… What if all those Illusionists are dead because of Belos? I’m JUST SAYING…! And not gonna lie, every time someone insulted Illusions, I kept imagining the Illusion Head just suddenly waking up and feeling like there’s a disturbance in the force, as well as a weird compulsion to beat up some Glandus kids. It’d be even funnier if he had beef with the Construction, Plant, and Abomination Heads as well!

         Speaking of which, more confirmation on Construction Magic being related to earth! Glad to see Bria give us a look into that, which furthers my idea of Belos using construction magic… Also dang, Bria and the Glandus Kids really are the parallels/foils to the Detention kids! You’ve got the short ‘nice’ girl, the tall lanky kid, the furry… But the Glandus Kids start off looking nice and cool, but turn out to be rather nasty!

         Meanwhile the Detention Kids seem like bad news and delinquents, but no! They’re just demonized and actually very kind and chill! The Detention Kids are looked down upon, the Glandus Kids are appraised… The Detention Kids are dual-track, the Glandus Kids are singular; Glandus Kids from, well, GLANDUS, Detention Kids from Hexside… One’s ‘mischief’ is actually very neat and cool, the other’s is literal grave robbing.

         I guess that’s how the bleeding statues got past the censors- It’s technically just an illusion! Also more insight into how Glandus works with its Survival of the Fittest mentality, I wonder if we’ll get confirmation on which coven heads came from there, how that might influence them as adults…

         What is Glandus like, is it more whole-heartedly accepting of Belos’ rule, hence its harsh ideals? Was it made after Hexside? Does Bump hate it for being so cruel like that, or is it just school bias? And dang poor Mattholomule, I always had a feeling he sort of felt and knew that he wasn’t much, so he accepted and compensated by deliberately doing whatever he can for power…

         They confirmed he’s from Glandus, and I appreciate this new look at him! This new leaf turned… Hot take but he’s honestly not as bad as Boscha, his stint with Gus was a one-time thing that Gus was able to live with! And that seems pretty good to set them up as friends! Speaking of Boscha, Willow was injured by pixies? And the last time we heard of pixies, they belonged to Boscha and caused the school to get shut down… Did BOSCHA DO THIS I SWEAR SHE IS DEAD TO ME-

         (Also she’s mentioned in the credits for this episode but I don’t remember hearing her? I might’ve gotten distracted with so much other things.)

         Gus! I like the insight into his relationship with Illusions, and I appreciate how he’s considering other forms of magic… But this hesitation might just serve to reaffirm his believe in Illusions, which is okay! It’s all about choice… And yeah, it seems Gus also has a case of impostor syndrome like King, no wonder they get along so well! I love the glimpses into Gus’ house and the confirmation that he has a library card, no Perry though alas…!

         I appreciate how Gus feels overlooked, like he has no real substance, which is how his Illusions reflect a desire to draw attention, but also the idea that there’s nothing real beneath them… Again, very much like King! And Gus, he’s not a powerhouse like the rest, he’s SKILLED and smart, but strength isn’t his forte, it’s not brute force he operates on, but cleverness! Trickery, I like it…! It’s a nice callback to his last A-plot episode, SVSF, where instead of fighting Mattholomule physically, Gus’ solution is to think outside the box and pull the alarm!

         You go kid, not relying on brute strength but showing that some clever tricks and thinking are just as valid! Kinda wonder if this episode is lowkey a discussion on masculinity for young boys, especially with Gus growing older with puberty, though the latter is mostly because his actual VA grew… But maybe the writers rolled with that and incorporated it, or it’s just a very neat coincidence! Also, it is me or did Mattholomule’s voice change? And the gag that Gavin’s dad looks identical to him, even moreso because he’s NOT supposed to have a moustache… That’s great!

         Malphas! Love this reference to a classic demon, I wasn’t sure if Malphas was the librarian with glasses whom I’ve always headcanoned as a father figure to Amity… But maybe it’s actually this bird dude! He seems adept in Bard magic, and I love the reveal of his true crow appearance… Guess those theorists were right that the one-eyed figure is from the Forbidden Stacks! Also Malphas NOT COOL with Amity, but I’m glad Luz changed his mind, and I wonder how that adventure looked…

         Which- DAMN, the RSD with Luz! She looks so UTTERLY BROKEN when Amity mentions doing stupid things, and she didn’t mean it like that, but Luz just looks so completely shattered and you can tell she wants to cry but instead she bottles it up and tries to take it in stride, and that plays into her trying to overcompensate for her mistakes AGAIN… SOMEONE GET IT TO HER HEAD that she doesn’t need to! I’m scared for Luz, and I was SO scared this episode would end on a bad note…

         BUT DOAHLDdFAEONDKFHN LUMITY KISS LUMITY KISS! ONE-SIDED BUT THEY FINALLY FUCKING KNOW AND AMITY IS LIKE WHAAAAT AND I WAS WAITING FOR IT AND I COULD FEEL IT HAPPEN AND GAY KISS! GAY KISS ON-SCREEN!!! And the way Luz just FLOPS to the ground on her knees AAHJJFFKHGGK and no Alador nor Odalia to ruin this, UTTERLY PERFECT and the twins WATCHING OOOHHHHGGGG YYYEEAAAAHHH-

         This is EVERYTHING I ever wanted!

         What an AMAZING episode with wonderful characer beats and reveals! Again, Amity’s growth as a character, that brief insight into how Luz as a person is very chaotic and sometimes frustrating for Amity and forces her to reevaluate, but ultimately it’s good and Luz DOES try her best, and Amity clearly wanted to make things up for Luz and apologize, they’re BOTH doing things, just the little moments!

         Also, Alex Lawther voices Philip Wittebane! He has long hair and a vaguely british accent, he’s… He’s Belos isn’t he? And they got a new VA because having him voiced by Matthew Rhys would be really spoiler-y right? He’s got the long hair and he’s a nerd… And with how he talks of finding a way back home, maybe Belos really DOES just want to return home, after all? He talks of making a way back home…

         And we see a glimpse of the Portal, so it might’ve brought him there? Or did Philip succeed in making it, and that was his blueprint designs? Did he arrive by Titan’s Blood? What happened to the portal if it brought him there, or if he made it? Why the scar, why near Eda’s house, partially buried?

         Was it lost before he could finish his work, and Philip got side-tracked into something else… Perhaps going on a crusade, on behalf of a curse/demon that possessed him? A demon that killed King’s father…? Was the portal broken and he had to discard it, but then it naturally healed- Or did it just need to recharge, maybe Philip DID make it back home, WHAT IS THE ANSWER?! Is there some sort of doppelganger for Philip, is BELOS his doppelganger?! What is THIS WHAT-

         WHAT AN EPISODE!

[silkling]

Of Newfound Knowledge and Truths of a Yesteryear

Of Moments in Life AU

———————————————————————————————————

Heatwave stood on his small training platform, punching the wooden dummy and trying to ignore the rage bubbling in the back of his processor. That morning, he’d read some of the data-pads that High Tide and Optimus had left, the ones Blades had read when Dreadwing first crashed on the island. What he’d learned had made him angry, and he didn’t understand how his teammate hadn’t been angry, too.

The Decepticons…the pads had a lot of information on what the ‘Cons had done throughout the War. The information had definitely been censored and sanitized, probably intentionally so his team wouldn’t be exposed to the full horrors of the War through the data pads, but it had still been enough for Heatwave to understand.

Dreadwing had said that the Decepticons started as a social revolution. But they were certainty far from that, now. The Rescue Force, Praxus, Iacon…they’d destroyed everything that had stood in their way, not caring if those they crushed were even involved in the War or not. It made him angry, his rescue protocols screaming with rage and loss in his processor.

As the conflicting emotions peaked, he heard the sound of pedes behind him and turned to see Dreadwing. Heatwave stepped away from the training post, the platform lowering to the ground as he crossed his arms and frowned. He liked the former Deception. He hadn’t spent as much time with him as the rest of his time, but he big bot was never violent or mean. He was a little blunt, and seemed to be a bit overly aggressive in his solutions for Heatwave’s peace-orientated processor, but he wasn’t a bad bot. At least, he didn’t appear to be.

Dreadwing seemed to notice his internal distress, because the larger bot pinned him with a considering and slightly concerned look. “You seem troubled, little one.” he rumbled.

“I’m not little.” Heatwave answered on reflex, mildly indignant. He didn’t understand why the Seeker referred to him and his teammates like that. Well, he supposed he did. They were all little, compared to him. “And…I guess I am.” He looked up at Dreadwing, a hard frown twisting his features.

“So I see.” Dreadwing, for his part, now looked ever so slightly amused. “And what is it what is causing you such distress?”

Heatwave made a frustrated noise, his vocalizer clicking in a sort of nonsense babble as he tried to think of how to explain. “I just–I don’t understand. How could they have done…everything they did?”

“What are you talking about?” Dreadwing asked, confused.

“I read the data lads Optimus and High Tide left! I learned about some of the things the Decepticons did!” he snapped, frustration and anger bleeding into his tone in place of previous confusion. Just the thought of what he’d learned was enough to make his spark sing with rage.

“Ah, now I understand.” The Seeker stated, his gaze becoming solemn and understanding. “And what did you learn, Heatwave?”

“You know what!”

“I do not. Your data pads are Autobot records, youngling. While I have no doubt there is truth there, I am also quite sure that much of that information is highly biased or just pure conjecture.”

The fire truck scowled. “Oh? So the Decepticons didn’t destroy Praxus, which was supposed to be a Neutral city?”

Dreadwing paused. “They did. It was before I joined, but they did.”

“And you’ve probably done a lot too, haven’t you?” He demanded. “Killed a lot of innocent bots, destroyed a lot of lives?” he was angry and hurting and he didn’t understand how Dreadwing could have joined a cause that was so horrible unless he was, as the human say, cut from the same cloth. But he couldn’t be, everything Heatwave had seen from the Seeker since his crash on the island directly conflicted with what the youngling had learned of the Decepticons. It just made him confused and left his spark aching.

The Seeker in question was silent, observing for a moment before he dipped his head. “I have. I have done many, many terrible things. I never killed sparklings or younglings, but I have killed countless Autobot soldiers and slain more than a few Neutral civilians on Megatron’s command.” He said softly. “I have aided in the stripping and destruction of planets, and I have directly contributed to the death of our homeworld. I do not deny any of this. I am not trying to escape my past, Heatwave, or to deny the crimes and atrocities I have committed.”

“Then why did you do them? Why are you here? Why should we let you stay if you’ve done all of that?” He didn’t actually want Dreadwing to leave, and the knew the others would want him to either. But he had just admitted to having committed horrible acts. Heatwave didn’t know what to think.

If the harsh questions bothered him, Dreadwing didn’t show it. “I did what I did because, at the time, I believed I was in the right. You know how Cybertron was in the Golden Age. You know of the emurata, of Functionism, of the caste system and how it was structured. Don’t tell me you don’t.” he said. “I rose from a system that sought to oppress me, and I turned to the only option I saw at the time. The Decepticons. It was wrong, and I have come to realize that.” He paused, tilting his head slightly. “I am here because I have little elsewhere I can go, and because I find myself growing fond of this place. I am here because Primus has granted me a second chance, an opportunity to do better and to be better, and I intend to take it.” Dreadwing took an extra moment to consider the last question. “You likely should not.” he answered. “I cannot change what I have done, all I can do it try to make amends and hope to find redemption one day.” He met the youngling’s gaze evenly. “But I would like to stay, if you would allow me the chance to pursue something better here.”

Heatwave held his gaze, then sagged and looked away. “Fine. I don’t even want you to leave anyway.” he sounded tired. “I won’t make you go. I don’t think I could. The others like you, and so do I. It’d just do more harm than good to everyone involved if I made you leave now.” he glanced up. “Just…tell me why. Why did the Decepticons do all of that? I don’t understand.” he sounded frustrated and helpless.

Dreadwing softened, his wings dipping down just slightly as his frame relaxed. “The Decepticons did not rise from nothing, little one.” he rumbled.

“What do you mean? The data pads said Megatron came out of nowhere and built them up before anyone realized what was going on.” He said, his anger abating in face of his even more confusion.

Dreadwing scoffed. “I am certain that many Autobot’s believe that.” his lips curled faintly, displeased. “That is, however, as far from the truth as you can get.”

“Then why would Autobot data pads contain that information as if it were fact?” he demanded, crossing his arms.

The Seeker hummed, tilting his head. “Perhaps, if you wish to have this discussion in its entirety, it would be best to sit somewhere?”

Heatwave paused, then nodded. “Lounge.” he said gruffly, leading the way. Once there, he dragged over a beanbag chair and settled into it comfortably, leaving the couch to the former Decepticon.

“To begin, I must ask how much you know about the Autobots and Decepticons as a whole, as well as how much you know and understand the political and social climate of the Golden Age.” Dreadwing stated.

Heatwave frowned. “I know what you told us when you first arrived.” he said, tilting his head. “I also know that the Autobot’s end goal is the restoration of Cybertron and the revival of our race. I know the Decepticons want to take control and lead Cybertron by force, and that their end goal is to put ‘Cons in charge and remove lots of freedom from bots under their rule.” he said. He crossed his arms, staring at a point on the floor as he tried to think. “I know that the Senate used to rule Cybertron during the Golden Age, and that they weren’t very fair and a lot of bots suffered, and that some of their regulations and punishments were extreme.” he tilted his head. “I know the caste system made the bots in the lower castes struggle a lot.” he seemed almost ashamed at this point. “I….I never paid the most attention to that, though. I was in the upper-middle caste, and my Function was something I already wanted to do.”

“Rescue work.” Dreadwing guessed.

The firetruck nodded. “Yeah.” he admitted.

“Then you know much of the very basics, though your knowledge lacks in the complexity and finer details of the full scope of the situation.” he rumbled. “You are correct. The Autobots fight for a restored Cybertron. But your knowledge of the Decepticons is…not entirely accurate.”

Heatwave’s engine growled with displeasure as he just grew more helplessly confused. “What?”

“The Decepticons do seek control, and they do seek to rule over Cybertron. That is true. It is also true that their goal is to see to the destruction of the Autobots. But it wasn’t always so.”

“Yeah, you mentioned they started as a social revolution.” Heatwave said, starting to calm down once he realized he’d be getting his answers, and without all the vagueness that came from Optimus whenever he tried to ask the Prime about the War.

“They did. But Megatron not rise from nothing, as the Autobots are so fond of believing. He rose from foundations that were already very deeply rooted. Functionism was a plague and the caste system was a rot that had sunk deep into the very core of our world.” he said, voice soft and somber. “It was a rot that infected only the oppressed and the beaten; it affected the lower castes and the undesirables, and those who lived comfortably in the higher castes did not feel the affects of it.”

“Undesirables?” Heatwave echoed, confused.

“Bots who did not fit into the world the Senate wished to portray. They wanted a Cybertron where every bot had a singular Function and operated according to that Function and ONLY according to that Function. They wanted a world where all those who were not of the Senate were subservient to them and obeyed them without question. They wanted a world that operated under the beliefs and celebrations and social structure they approved of. Those who did not fit into that world, and who could not fit into that world, were deemed undesirable.” He cast the youngling a meaningful look. “For the Senate, that included flight-frames. It is why they were so eager to see the spread of anti-flyer sentiments, to confine flyers, whether they were Seekers or not, to a single city. Flight-frames have a different base coding to ground-frames, and the Senate were all ground-frames. In their optics, flight-frames were a danger to their rule because flyers, by the nature of our frames, do not fit seamlessly into a Functionist society.” he paused. “It certainly did not help that the social structure, belief system, and cultural behavior of flight-frames was radically different to that of ground-frames, and that it was radically different to what the Senate was trying to enforce.”

Heatwave was silent for a long moment, considering what he was told. “But…you said the caste system was a rot. What did you mean?”

Dreadwing hummed, his fingers tapping a pattern on the couch; it was a very human gesture, one he had picked up from the Burnses without even realizing it. He had to word this carefully. Not because he wanted to manipulate the younger bot, but because it was a complex situation and a rather unpleasant one. “You said we’re were of the upper-middle caste.” he said carefully. “And that fits with your frame type and your Function. But have you never thought about the types of bots that fill each level of the caste system?” he asked.

Heatwave furrowed his optical ridges, shaking his helm. “No…” he said slowly. “I know…I know artists were considered among the lowest tier of the high castes. I know scientists and medics were high caste, and that the only bots above them were politicians.” he said.

Dreadwing smiled faintly. The young bot was starting to understand on his own. “Indeed. But those bots only made up a minority of Cybertron’s population. What of the others? What of the common laborers?”

“You mean, like, cleaners and construction bots? You’re right, they were more common than scientists, medics, or artists.” he said. “Like Boulder. He was originally a construction bot.”

He nodded. “They were indeed more common. But what caste did the Senate assign to them?”

“The…the lower caste.” Understanding was starting to bloom in Heatwave’s optics. “The lowest caste, for most of the laborer frames.” he realized. “That means…Boulder was from the lower castes.”

Dreadwing hummed agreement. “He was. If you wish to know more, then you shall have to ask him yourself. It is not my place to tell you what he experienced.” He sighed heavily. “But I will tell you that the lower castes, the bots who made up the majority of our people, did not often lead pleasant lives. They received little pay for their work, could not often afford decent fuel, if they could afford any fuel, and most of their pay would have to go to maintaining their living space. It oft left them overtired, overworked, and very, very hungry. It did not help that many of them had dangerous Functions, dangerous jobs, and after paying for their living quarters and fuel, they did not have the shanix for medical care. It meant the lower castes were forced to choose between their need for fuel and their health.”

Heatwave swallowed, his optics blown wide. “Oh.” he whispered. “But…why didn’t they do anything?”

Dreadwing looked almost melancholic at his question. “Most of the lower castes simply did not have the time or energy to fight against it. They were too tired, too hungry, to injured or sick, and were forced to focus purely on their own survival.” he stated. “And those few that did try to speak up…” he trailed off. “The Senate was not kind to dissenters, little one. If they did not use empurata on those who protested their systems, they used other means of punishment and silencing.” his tone was grim.

Heatwave chose not to ask what those “other means” were. He had a feeling he didn’t want to know. “It…it was really that bad?”

The Seeker bowed his helm. “Ask Boulder or Blades. They would know the best of your teammates.” Though, he had his suspicions about the means of Chase’s creation, and if he was right then the police bot might also know how bad the Senate could be.

“Boulder, I get. But why Blades?”

“The little flyer once told me that one of his brothers was a flight-frame. He would not have experienced the cruelty directly, as he was a ground-frame on Cybertron, but he would doubtless have experienced or seen it through his brother.”

“Oh.” Heatwave was starting to get the feeling that he didn’t know as much about his team as he thought he did. He really needed to fix that. “I guess I understand why the Decepticons rose to quickly then, if things were really that bad for so long.”

“Indeed.” Dreadwing agreed. “But there is one more thing you must understand.”

“Which is?” Heatwave was feeling a little sick to his tanks. He hadn’t been aware the situation on Cybertron had been so bad, but then again, he’d lived a good life. He’d had all the fuel he needed, he never worried about his health or safety, his living situation was pretty much always assured, and he actually enjoyed working according to his Function. He wouldn’t have experienced the rot Dreadwing mentioned, so it only made sense he wasn’t entirely aware of it. That didn’t get rid of the guilt, though.

“The Decepticons are made up almost entirely of flight-frames and those of lower castes. There are certainly some of those among Autobot forces, but the grand majority of them are Decepticon.” Dreadwing pinned Heatwave under a severe look. “What does that tell you, little one?”

“It tells me that the Autobots are mostly ground-frames and bots from the middle and upper castes.” he answered, suddenly understanding the War in a whole new light. It certainly didn’t excuse what the Decepticons had done, but now this…this made it a lot easier to understand.

“Indeed.” he agreed. “The Decepticons originally rose on the backs of bots who were beaten down and had little else to lose, bots whose only crime was to want a better life.” he said. “When the Senate, and later the original Autobots before Optimus Prime, attempted to beat them back down to their “proper place”, they fought back for the freedom that should have always been theirs.” His gaze went distant, as if remembering something from long ago. “The Decepticons were originally a freedom movement, little one. It was only as time wore on and the spilled energon between the factions soured that they lost their way and forget their original mission.”

“And now?”

“Now, because so many Autobots are ground-frame or originated from the higher castes, they do not understand why their enemy continue to fight. Certainly, many Decepticons fight because they wish to destroy the Autobots, but there are many, many more who only fight because they fear that an Autobot victory means a return to the ways of the Golden Age. It is something that Prime and his bots simply do not, and perhaps never will, understand.”

“So most of the Autobots…they weren’t bots who were hurt by the Senate.”

“No.” Dreadwing agreed. “Prime’s team on Earth is a good example. Prime himself is formerly of the lower-high caste, as he was a former Archivist. His scout was upper-middle caste, and while he was too young to receive his Function at the start of the War he would very easily have made a successful racer. The femme-bot was an Enforcer, also considered upper-middle caste. And of course, the medic. Ratchet was famed, even before the War.” The Seeker smiled sardonically. “He was quite firmly in the highest castes. All of them operated according to their Function, and all of them were content with it.” He tilted his head. “The only bot on Prime’s own team who does not fit that mold is his Wrecker, who was once a construction bot. He is the only one who might truly understand.”

Heatwave nodded, looking own at his lap. “I think I get it now. This war…it’s not going to end until the Autobots understand that stuff, is it? Because they won’t understand why most of the Decepticons keep fighting, why they started fighting in the first place.” he said, looking up to meet red optics.

“Yes. You’re very intelligent, little one. You learn fast.” Dreadwing slumped slightly, releasing a heavy vent. “You are correct. So long as the Autobots do not understand, then the Decepticons, at least those who only fight out of a fear of a return to the old ways, will never stop what they are doing.”

“You really know a lot about this stuff.”

“I am a Seeker, Heatwave. I experienced much of the Senate’s cruelty directly, as did most of my frame-kin.”

The Rescue Bot nodded, subdued. Now he understood. A part of him wished he didn’t, but he was glad he did. He sighed, meeting Dreadwing’s gaze again. “I think I owe you an apology, then. I judged you based on incomplete information.”

Dreadwing bowed his helm. “Thank you, little one. As I said, I certainly committed horrible acts, and I can never undo what I have done, but now I only make to make amends as I move forward.”

Heatwave nodded, smirking and straightening up. “I think you can. And lucky for you, we’re here to help.” he said.

Dreadwing blinked, before he chuckled, his wings lifting as the mood brightened. “So you are. Thank you, youngling.”

“We’re Rescue Bots.” Heatwave grinned. “Helping others is what we do.”

“So it is.” He agreed, looking amused. “And perhaps, I can also help you?”

He blinked, taken aback. “Me? How?”

“I have noticed you practicing with your sparring post. Your form is acceptable, and I am aware that the Rescue Force trained its Teams to have combat abilities, but I can help you improve. Your current skills will help you fight if a rescue mission were to go wrong, but if you wish, then I can help expand and improve your combat capability even beyond that.”

Heatwave blinked. “You’ll teach me how to fight.” he stated.

“I would be glad to, if you wish to learn. There may come a day when you must fight a true enemy, and if that day comes then greater combat skill may be helpful.” Dreadwing pointed out.

Heatwave narrowed his optics, considering the unsaid implications of that statement. “…you think the War might come to us.”

“Perhaps.” he said grimly. “I pray that it does not, but in the event it does I think it is better that you are prepared to fight against an enemy who truly wishes to see your spark go out.”

He nodded, gaze firming. The others would need lessons too, in that case. The Rescue Force did teach them all basic combat, in the event that they needed to fight off anything that might be threatening whoever or whatever they were rescuing, but their combat training had been pretty basic. If Dreadwing was right, and there was a possibility of Sigma-17 one day facing an opponent that wanted them dead, then they’d need to shape up. He stood, hands curling into fists as his shoulders lifted and determination burned in his spark. He stared the Seeker in the optics.

“Let’s do it.”

Dreadwing stood, a faint smile curling at his lips, and clapped a hand on the youngling’s shoulder. “I look forward to it.” he said, a hint of pride in his tone. Heatwave was so very young, but already he was shaping up to be a fine mech, a fine leader.

Heatwave himself only grinned, blue optics bright. “So do I.”

He’d learned a lot today. Not all of it had been pleasant, and a distinctly unpleasant feeling still curled in his tanks, but he was glad to learn what he had. The past was dark and violent, he’d come to realize. Cybertron’s history was steeped in shadows and darkness and Heatwave was certain that he still didn’t know everything, that Dreadwing had certainly omitted many of the worst of the details. Given all that, he really couldn’t find it in himself to be surprised that the War had happened.

Now though, wasn’t the time to focus on the past. Not Cybertron’s past, and not on Dreadwing’s past either. He tilted his helm up to turn his grin on the larger bot, leaning his weight into the hand on his shoulder and enjoying the small physical contact. Yes, he decided. Dreadwing’s past didn’t matter, not here. All that mattered was what was to come, and Heatwave was determined to meet whatever the future held for them head on.

For himself, and for his newfound family — all of them, even its newest addition.

———————————————————————————————————

Here it is, folks! The next installment in “of moments in life”! This one goes a little deeper into Pre-War Cybertron’s social/political climate. Heatwave got a massive reality check. He was sorta privileged, by the standards of the Golden Age, and he’s being forced to realize what that meant and what it blinded him to. Poor youngling, his entire worldview just got rocked.

As for Dreadwing, he now has another son! The next installment will be tHe Blades and Dreadwing one. It’s gonna be sad. They’re gonna talk about their brothers. That’s all I’ll say! I have prompts fo write for before I can get to it, so it’ll be a bit, but stay tuned, it’ll come out! Anyway, hope y’all liked it! Let me know your thoughts!

Until next time, folks!

[gutscenes]

grandmaster of demonic cultivation vol. 1 chapter 1: reincarnation -- thoughts

Okay, so. I am reading the MDZS novels for the first time (the Seven Seas English version). I have only watched The Untamed so far. I wanted to record my thoughts and reactions as I read, chapter by chapter, because I know Wei Wuxian and Lan Zhan are going to wreck me even more in the novels than they did in the censored (albeit beautiful, tender, heartrending) TV show. So I’m posting these thoughts and reactions here. Diving in…

“‘Rejoice, Wei Wuxian is dead!’” What an opening!!! This is what I’m talking about!!! Gossipers talking shit about our (allegedly) omnipotent, demonic, treacherous main character after his violent death…I’m hooked. He’s horrible and evil and dead, I’ll take five of him.

I lowkey wish I had not watched The Untamed first, but alas. The disconnect between everyone’s awful opinion of Wei Wuxian + his demonic cultivation, and the reality of his character + his motivations, would have been so exciting to uncover throughout reading. OH WELL STILL STOKED

MXTX sets it up brilliantly. From the jump the reader is fed what everyone and their mom thinks about Wei Wuxian, as well as a list of his most heinous crimes. 5000 dead?? Demonic cultivation?? Ghost generals biting everyone??? How could he be anything but a villain? …And now I get to spend the next few books getting to know him. I love changing my mind, I love being proven wrong, etc., etc.

“After Wei Wuxian’s death, judgment of his character was no longer refutable. The discussions were mostly the same, and any small voice of dissent was immediately squashed.” I wonder who the small voices of dissent were…I mean, other than Lan Zhan and Mianmian? You still got shooters out here WWX!!

Absolutely inspired by how petrified the entire cultivation world is of one guy AFTER he dies. Even after his death they are like, oh god oh no we cannot take any chances of this guy coming back. To the point where they try to SUMMON HIS SOUL again to keep tabs on him. It’s farcical. 

“Every major clan began conducting frequent soul-summoning rituals. They also strictly monitored for cases of possession, sought far and wide for abnormal occurrences, and heightened their security to the max.” They’re obsessed, it’s a posthumous slay.

“In the first year, all was peaceful. In the second year, all was peaceful. In the third year, all was peaceful.……In the thirteenth year, all was still peaceful.” Something tells me things are about to get significantly less peaceful *eyes emoji*

Anyway I’m so, so excited to be finally reading this lmao. Gonna start chapter 2 now

[scummy-writes]

[CHAPTER 19 & PREM]

Notes for myself. I know he dislikes this stuff already, its very clear, but i wanted the exact verbiage he uses. I am surprised he doesnt outright say rape. I wonder if thays a censoring thing or a Gilbert thing.

Surprised sariel or. Anyone. Never told her about the king. I guess it doesnt matter? But i feel like it is good knowledge to have... i guess they also dont want it getting out, but they so freely syate it in so many routes? Lukes mother was not the only one raped so?? I feel like its important to take into account how someone would act as a king, on good AND bad days.

Gilbert the criminology expert. I am... happy. But this points to why his heart got so corrupted also, swarming himself into awful awful cases and atudying. Its for the betterment of others, he wants this stuff to stop for the sake of others. Word soup right now but. I wonder when this is realized by her and him. Killing awful people and knowlingly having to sacrifice a few (the civil war hes trying to ignite) to try and turn the tides of ruling completely.

I figured thats why he wasnt really super awful to either of them. He was awful but not super.

Ah i want to screenshot all of this. Jesus christ. Ill have to record this whole chapter for myself because of this speech.

I feel like its difficult to comment on. I am not good at politics, i am nodding along and understanding this is an extreme, but its difficult to make any comments due to just...nodding...

I wonder if he also wants to die due to the grief of it all. *weedles my hcs into this*. All i keep thinking about is a gilbert, alone at night plagued by nightmares of his mother, the disappointment she would have, and promising himself and the memory of her (and albert) that itll end 'soon' because he plans to die like this.

And he wants emma to do it. To be the last thing he sees before he dies, the object of his love and obsession.

I cant fogure out if he wants it so that he can dig himself further into a villain, to crush his heart due to the only woman he loved passing judgement thay he SHOULD die to atone for his sins, as a dramatic final act of some sort of self harm, or because he wants her to be the last thing he sees so that he can leave with a sense of happiness and feeling love as his final feeling, even if its twisted.

Typing that made me want to cry

I want gilbert to have a life free of this pain. I wish he could just have a small home on the countryside with emma.

Is it because he never expected her to Not want him dead? Hes shocked that his secret desires of her liking him back are showing to be possivle? That she deems him redeemable enough to live despite whay hes done?

Hes gonna show her a lot worse now huh.

-> WALTER?!?!?! MY MAN?!?!?! MAN OF THE HOUR?!?!??!

-> ITS WALTER!!!!!!!

i love how gilbert talks to him. Okay like in context he sounds so awful but--- okay listen in some events it sounds like he always does this when they try to scold him. Also funny the threat happens when walters like "oh she exists?" LMAO love that they thought he was just fucking delusional in regards to her apparently.

I want to know so badly what gilbert has said about her. I also feel like some things may have been feverish ramblings that walter was not supposed to hear.

-> "well, that's killed the mood" lmao

Man after my own heart.

I desperately want to imagine he has collected books that shes liked over the years, in order to try and feel what she felt while reading them, to feel closer to her.

I also want to imagine hes collected books he thought she might enjoy, too.

-> "although, I just really wanted to make you happy" sobs

-> gdi i missed screenshotting his advancement with the food. If anyone is reading this and has a screenshot of what he said he did....pls...gib....

Argh i hit the photo limit.

-> "i don't wanna" ily. Youre like a fuckin kid sometimes.

-> both genders of workers and such

-> novles and commoners at the castle dressed the same to avoid preconceptions

-> PREM STORY? fucking hell i forgot there was an avatar check. I hit the photo limit. Was already mad i couldnt show the screenie about her thinking about his life and him killing. Ill do that next note chapter.

[PREM STORY]

-> both outfits are my jam this time.

-> "i want to know how we can make up again." " atrocious" "what a kind bunny you are"

-> "are you playing at psychoanalysis now?" Looks at my notes. Looks back at game.

-> "thats gross"

-> the shock at her saying its cowardly. Is it because he didnt consider that ( he HAD to have of, right????) Or just surprised again that she thinks along those lines?

-> again. The crux of wanting to feel the love of the object of your affections verses having to stick to your guns so that she does not know the true depth of it all and will not be ruined by your death, so that she can keep the purity with her and you still got to experience it....ah.......pain....suffering....gILBERT

-> does not want to hurt her, confliction. Ough i am glad i bought this ill be rereading it and crying later.

[You unlocked: Gun!]

PART 2 - GILBERT ROUTE SPOILERS POST

The last post got really long since hitting 'readmore' shows you ALL the reblogs on it, so I made a part 2 for chaps 12-20(?).

I'll be reblogging this post each chapter or so with personal thoughts and general screaming under a cut. I'll be having it in a format with the chapter numbered, and then a cut directly after where I'll be yelling. I already know some major spoilers with gilberts route, so if you have not finished his route yet, be wary.

I'll be using the tags 'Scum Simps' and 'scum plays gil route' for those of you who want to filter it out. Thank u!

[taeslovehandles]

I never meant to target you and I'm sorry you felt that way. You properly tag everything and adhere to the "don't like, don't read" rule. I don't follow you nor you follow, because we simply don't vibe together and that's okay.

But there are posts that are on the more "innocent" side that do represent fat people as a joke and it's like they don't even realize it because it's something so well ingrained in our fatphobic society.

For example, all the characters are having fun except the fat one or referring to someone as "twice his size" (like... If they want to say he's huge, they should just say it, not imply that there's a "right size" for someone to be).

I don't think authors should censor themselves, just acknowledge the role they play in how fat characters are perceived by the community they write for.

-🍓

First of all, since you obviously haven’t blocked me, you could have come to me via direct message. This is not a topic that needs to be brought out into the public eye even more than it already is. I have worked with anons before, I would have been the last person to reveal who you are. You could have made a trash account to message me in dm’s, but since you didn’t, I will reply to you here.

I want to make one thing clear. This will be my last response on the topic. If you do not like me as a member of the community please use the block button and filter me out, because I will stay. I have many friends here, and know that many people enjoy my content. Just because a small handful of people don’t appreciate dark themes in fiction, the contents of which they can easily protect themselves from, won’t make me falter.

Now, I want to debunk this ask because your ‘apology’ actually made me very upset.

I know you don’t mean it when you say you are sorry because you’re backpedaling on what you’ve told your friends and it really rubs me the wrong way. You could have owned up to your mistakes and apologized sincerely like others had but you continue to play victim and excuse your behaviour with tales of your own trauma, projecting your own insecurities onto my blog and thus hating me.

I know for a fact that you despise my blog, especially my writing, because you do not like how “obviously skinny people write about weight gain.”

Honey.

I couldn’t be any further from skinny.

I don’t mind sharing my actual weight, which has actually gotten worse due to COVID. I weigh 490lbs. I am morbidly obese. I have always been morbidly obese. For you to come and be “nitpicky” about a genre you don’t even enjoy? Why are you even reading my fics then?

The way I write about obese people, their struggles with literally everything… that comes from real life experience. I write this to share embarrassing and exhausting daily life tasks I personally struggle with.

A skinny person would never write some of the stuff I do, because they simply don’t know. They don’t know how scary it is to hear the line “we are going to a restaurant.” They don’t know how scary it is to go into that new restaurant, scan the chairs and think “Shit, am I gonna fit? Is the chair gonna creak? Is there enough space for the next table? What if I won’t fit?” A thin person doesn’t have to think this way.

And, let me tell you something else. Yes, I agree. The world is fatphobic.

In one of my recent posts I talked about movies and shows where they make fun of fat people because I hate it. Because it is REAL LIFE. And I am all for the body positivity movement and I do believe that all bodies are beautiful, because they are.

You do not know me personally.

And that leads to my next point. If you personally have issues with the phrase “twice my size”, then that is on you. And guess what? I cannot count how often I’ve heard lines like that my whole life.

“Oh wow two people would fit in one of your pant legs.”

“Wow, you are so fat, I could use your pants as a tent.”

So trust me, I know. I KNOW. But anon, this is the important part for me. Everyone processes trauma differently.

Inked ch3? Or literally any story I have written with a fat character being forced, insulted and talked down to like they’re dumb? That’s what I have been living with my entire life. Most of these stories, some obviously more extreme than how I had experienced them since it’s fiction, have been recordings of trauma I have went through.

My own dad force fed me. Forced me to eat food and gain weight. My first boyfriend was a feeder that manipulated me into gaining more weight and took measurements. Called me pig names and abused me. Hit me, manipulated me into having s** with him and then let all of his fantasies out on me.

I don’t make this shit up. I hate my brain for being so twisted now, that I actually find it hot and arousing. It’s weird. I know, but that’s how it is.

I’ve also never had friends in school. Not even kindergarten. Why? Because my “fat incased body could spread like a virus.” I was being bullied like JK was in Pondus.

I had hot water thrown at me, got glue put on my seats and hair, had my hair ripped out and even got a cigarette burn mark on my arm. Just because I was fat. Just because of how my body was shaped.

I was strangled and locked into a small locker for a night. I was almost killed for running away from my abusive dad from his car and had to listen to things like, “You are going to die when you are 30. No one will ever love you and your body.” That I have trust issues now and am paranoid about everything and everyone.

Those dark stories. I use those dark stories to try to work through my trauma. And yes, it may be absurd to you. It may disgust you, what I write. But sadly, most of it? Most of it really happened to me. To me and other people I’ve talked to as a friend or seen online. Most of what I write will be dark because the human species is made up of terrible creatures.

Fatphobia is an important topic, and I am happy the media has been slowly getting better about it, that people accept us more. But my writing is how I work with my trauma. If I can make fictional characters feel the same things I had to feel, that makes me feel better.

And I��m not hurting anyone with it. So how is it wrong?

I do not support any of this behaviour in real life. I never bullied anyone, I always try to speak up for my friends and tell people if they are being assholes. Because I hate them too and it makes me angry when good people get shit when they do nothing but breathe.

And how @pudgecuddles already said. I don't need you to advocate for body positivity and all that shit when you go out of your way to bully someone that may have experienced the same shit you have. I do not know you or what you went through in your life, but I am sorry. I’m sorry you feel like my stories aren’t okay to write, but this is how I work on my trauma and I need you to respect that.

I’ve said this before. We don’t have to be friends, or even talk to each other.

Just be neutral.

Block me. Filter me out. Pretend I don't exist. But, whatever you do, don’t make posts that call me out while making it obvious you’re talking about me, with the cover that you are advocating against fatphobia. That’s got a name. Cyber-bullying.

Have you hurt me with those posts? Yes you have, but I’ve never wanted bad blood. As you may have noticed, it wasn’t me that made a post. It was my good friend. Because I told her how exhausting it was and she knew about the posts back then.

I have a good idea of who you are.

I remember you.

But I kept my mouth shut. Because this community is my home and the last thing I wanted was for the people who like both of our types of content to feel like they have to choose sides.

In the end, we all rub one out to fat gay boys in a band. No user is better than the rest, and if there are topics you do not enjoy, there is a button for it. No need to drag everyone into it with posts. It’s exhausting and irritating.

Now, I do not accept your apology because you lied to me and I also do not feel like you meant it sincerely knowing what I know now after reading some dm’s. But I also won’t sit here and start shit.

This is my last post about this.

Please block me and enjoy the content you do like.

Nonetheless, I hope you have a nice day and a lovely weekend. Whatever you are experiencing or going through, I hope it gets better. Because even if you hate me personally for creating content you do not support, I’d say that I am a really friendly and nice person.

I do not believe that anyone deserves to be bullied like that and talked down in official posts. It happened before with a friend of mine and you probably remember that I did speak up about it.... But apparently no one learned from it. I really hope this time you do.

Insult me and shit talk me all you want in dm’s, but don’t do it publicly. No one deserves that kind of hate or passive aggressiveness. No one. Since you sound like someone that went through a lot of shit too, you should know better. You should know how it feels to be bullied and what damage it can cause.

I’m already depressed enough and I have bad lows. Let me write my erotica and just enjoy it? That’s all I want? I am a part of this community just like you were. You leaving because you did not like my content, is not my problem. If you cannot block me or ignore it and go so far as to read them and then rant about them negatively, what do you want me to do? I won’t leave the scene just because you don’t like me.

So, you either trash talk me in dm’s from now on so that I do not see it, or you block me. The latter of which would be the more mature thing to do. The more humane thing to do. Because talking behind someone’s back is just as bad.

Again, I don’t know why you felt like it was necessary to send me an ask with lies in it when I got screenshot proof of something else you have said/issues with, so don’t backpedal on me. I know Hun. I know already.

At least stick to what you said and actually apologize or, if you can’t, just block me.

But this ask? This ask just upset me.

Have a nice day.

p.s: The fact that this even needs to be talked about is so absurd and ridiculous to me. The whole thing is a petty party in my eyes that isn't even worth anyone's time? Do people on here really not have any other issues right now or am I in the wrong movie?