#off to get ready for this

[slickshoesareyoucrazy]

Ch-ch-ch-Changes

I'm not at the cemetery today, A. I'm getting ready to go to brunch with R. Again.

I know you find this hilarious wherever you are, because I've been to brunch 3 times now since Christmas Eve, and it's just such a Stereotypical White Suburban Mom thing to do, which has never ever been me. Remember how often I texted you from 'events' when the Boy was in elementary school because I so obviously did not fit in with the other moms and I was desperate for somebody to talk to me about anything I could relate to? Jesus, they were comparing their Apple Watches for that entire 2 hour field trip bus ride that one time, and I couldn't talk to BOY and embarrass him. 🙄 So it was sit there in complete awkward silence or text you. Thank goodness you were there for that. Or the time they were going on about how much they love John Mayer (blech 😜) and you texted me all those lyrics like a First Class Wiseass (I'm still JV mad at you for that, man.). Talking about holiday sales and nail polish. I just...can't do it. I've never been good at fitting in at all, but especially not with other girls/women.

The Christmas Eve brunch was with the two girls from high school who badgered me into going to junior prom when I didn't want to go. But I went, because my son tells me I'm supposed to 'build a community,' so for that whole first year and change after you died, I really did try to open myself up to accepting every invitation I got, even the ones I'd normally turn down, especially when you were alive to validate my choice. ('BRUNCH with T and A (yes, really...T and A)?! On Christmas Eve?! Don't ruin your holiday with that shit, Jen...') At this brunch, these women, who felt so 'close' to me when we were young they 'needed' me to go to prom with a date I was wholly disinterested in, so I could sit at their table with them and stare awkwardly at walls except when I was talking to you (and you were making those stops at our table because you were quite nakedly trying to date T at the time); T, who was so 'close' to me then she convinced me to apply to a college where she said we could be roommates and then backed out of attending there last minute; these women who apparently both felt so 'close' to me now wanted to meet on CHRISTMAS EVE to have brunch both told me in gasping surprise that they didn't know I had a brother. *They didn't know I had a brother.* My brother, who ruled my social life as a teenager. Who stopped me from getting part time jobs and attending high school social events. Who you and D and B definitely knew about...you guys played cards with him; took him bowling with us; took him to baseball games... They didn't know he existed. That's how much attention they paid to me ever. Not just when we were young, but Christ, they didn't even see a Facebook picture of my brother in the years I was there, back when you could actually see the people you were 'friends' with?! That cured me of taking every invite.

The last brunch with R a couple weeks ago, we went to a way better, cooler place to have it (if brunch can ever be 'cool'), and at first I thought, hey maybe I'll even be good with this. R is making a very sincere effort to be my friend, even though her attempts at bonding are...off target. ('Let's go to a giant Christmas craft fair in a crowded, downtown arena that will be full of middle aged white suburban moms like us but who are REAL into Christmas and crafting and it will look like Santa barfed all over everything!' No thanks, R. Let's just go to lunch somewhere. 'Hey do you want to go have a pedicure?' Um...no. The Boy actually saw that text come in; he happened to be standing behind me and read it over my shoulder, not that he makes a habit of that, and cracked up laughing. 'Does R not know you're weird, Mom?' She knows I'm weird, buddy. She's known me since we were 12. She just doesn't know I'm THAT kind of weird, because it's not a weird I advertise.) But at this brunch, she did the whole, "I'm treating myself. I worked so hard this week. This all looks so delicious..." and ordered big. Yay! I love ordering big! And sharing! But then she took exactly 1 bite of things and boxed the rest up. I ate like I normally would have, even though I was feeling naturally self conscious with a non-eater, and low-key worried that maybe she has a low grade eating disorder, and also low-key suspicious this was a passive aggressive attempt at telling me I'm overeating and I shouldn't.

So I'm going out again today with R. I'm still trying with her. She's who showed up for me when you died (which I'm still surprised about). Brunch and *shopping.* I'm still not any more comfortable with this Regular Girl shit. But I'm doing it, because last weekend, Boy's bestie came over and I thought it was just going to be screwing around and playing video games, like a C visit normally is. But C brought over his last calculus test (which he did poorly on). And Boy went over all the answers with him. Patiently. Encouraging. ('You did 85% of this right, you just kinda messed up this part. If you do this...') It reminded me so much of you, I cried pretty hard for the first time in a while. And it wasn't only because of the literal calculus help, but it was seeing how HAPPY my son was to help out C. He WANTED to help. It wasn't a burden in any way. C was stressed out; he was feeling down that he wasn't good at something he felt he was supposed to be good at, and Boy was HAPPY to help him with it. You were happy to help me. 🥹 I always thought I was a cross you had to drag around behind you. But you LIKED being there for me. 😭🥹♥️ You helped me with math a lot when we were kids, but you're still doing it, aren't you? And you definitely enabled me not trying with friendships with women when you were alive. You made it ok to not try; I didn't have to; I had you. But that's been changing some lately. I mean, I can still hear that laugh and your derisive, 'BRUNCH?!' but R keeps showing up for me because you're still helping me do the hard shit I'm not good at. Like making girl friends. It's weird that she's who you picked, but Wicked with her was actually fun, so... 🤷 And she IS helping. Even though it's brunch and shopping. ♥️

[sylusbitch]

my favorite hc is that penelope was told by the ladies in waiting to go and stay in her room and not to come out for anyone

and she hears screams and whatnot and is like oh fuck now theyve done it, the suitors are gonna destroy the place

only to hear the screams lessen in volume and being like ? are they killing each other?

but then she hears a scream clear as day "THIS WILL BE YOUR FATE" and she's like🧍‍♀️no fuckin shot my husband is down there on a murder spree

and she immediately starts pacing back and forth like "LADIES HELP ME PREPARE I NEED TO LOOK DIVINE" and it's a full makeover sequence

and they're posing her and being like "hold on, tilt your chin up a little bit, turn to the side like 12 degrees- BOOM my lady you are serving such cunt"

and then they hear odysseus' loud ass steps going up the stairs and all the ladies scatter while penelope tries to look nonchalant like "AHEM....😳 is it you? have my prayers been answered?"

[whalesharkstho]

thinkin bout how jazz was taller than orion at the beginning of the movie lol

[lazylittledragon]

y'know every time i feel guilty about bothering someone by singing along when i'm listening to music, i just remember that i have to tolerate my dirtbag brother screaming at his ps5 for hours every day so listening to muffled off-key fall out boy is probably preferable

[who-is-page]

"You can't have [experience] because you don't identify as [label]!!!" how do I explain to people that experiences exist outside of and prior to the formation of specific language to talk about them

"You can't have [experience] because you don't think of it through [framework/explanation/etc]!!!" how do I explain to people that experiences exist outside of and prior to any formal cosmology, hypotheses, or explanation assigned to them

[slutdge]

not the news having an oxygen countdown while they run other stories 😭

[bluerosefox]

Always Favors You

Another Sibling Danny and Jason idea!!

"Are you Jason Peter Todd?!" demanded a deep and commanding tone from the strange glowing being in front of them.

All the Bats stiffened and tensed, no doubt gearing up for a fight against the being that somehow knew Red Hood's full name.

Jason, Red Hood, decided to put on a brave front despite no doubt cursing in his head and wondering how the heck did this thing know his full freaking name.

"Whose asking." he snarled out, his hands twitching for his gun when the huge glowing knight with purple flames coming out of his helmet and cape, who was riding on a nightmare looking horse while they all had been in the cave going over tonight's patrol.

The Knight didn't seemed bothered by his response nor did he even seem to care or flinch when Batman made his own demand on 'Why was he there and who was he' or when Damian unsheathed his sword and pointed it towards him. Instead the strange glowing Knight reached to it side and pulled out... A glowing scroll? Huh. (Also he completely unnerved everyone in the room when the Knight didn't even react when Batman had tossed a Baterang when he reached for his side)

The Knight opened the scroll and spoke clearly with purpose.

"Jason Peter Todd,

You are hereby invited as a special guest of honor to the crowning of our future King of the Infinite Realms.

Daniel Phantom, once Daniel Jackson Fenton, and once Daniel Austen Todd.

Prince of the Infinite Realms, the Keeper of Balance, The Peacekeeping Halfa, the Defeater of the Tyrant King Pariah Dark, The Great One, Youngest of the Ancients, Ancient of Space, The Bridge between Life and Death.

You, the half-brother of our King, have been given the highest of honors for your past actions and will be given housing and food in the Realms and Phantom's Keep, for the week long event. Personal servants and attendants will be at your disposal and a seamstress will be on hand to tailor make your attire for the Coronation.

Signed: Clockwork. Ancient of Time. Watcher of the Infinite Timeline. Kronos. Mentor and Adviser.

PS: I shall have Fright Knight ("Me" the Knight bluntly said for a second) leave this scroll along with a personal one for you from Daniel to read over and once you make up your mind sign the bottom of the scroll.

I do hope in time you will pick the right choice Jason Todd, we of the Infinite Realms would like to reward you for your actions. After all, if you hadn't gotten young Daniel away from your father that night all those years ago, we would never had gained our Prince nor be free from our once Tyrant King.

Ah, one more thing.

The Infinite Realms will always favor you Jason."

Jason felt like he couldn't breath as Fright Knight? Rolled up the scroll, pulled a letter from his side, and held out the two items for him to take.

[zorangezest]

1/3

here we go! the longest comic i've ever drawn and one of my favourite things i've ever made! and it's. for this crack transformers au. what have i done. ive spent so long on this

next

[freshbeeth]

lives were destroyed

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Cite your sources.

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[cosmicrhetoric]

my personal fave "luffy holds a mirror up to someone's soul" moments. aka the whole point i think

[catsharky]

Yeah I was right and there was no way I was getting the rest of this done without making you all wait another month or two, so I just went to the next good break point. We're officially past the halfway point with Astarion though, so not too much longer before you actually get to see Rolan again!

Part 1 • Previous Part • Next Part

Full page format under the cut:

[critterbitter]

Au where Emmet gets eebie jeebied into Hisui right before the events of Pokemon Arceus and ends up hunting down a shriveled onion with time powers with the world’s worst tour guide. ((Also at some point learns Ingo is living in the mountains this entire time.))

(Same au as the emmet and elektross get tossed into the past! I will simply never officially nail the timeline down beyond growing it like a barnacle cloister.)

Masterlist of my submas stuff

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

OH YEAH if i made you laugh or just inserted regrettable thoughts into your head against your will this year, now's a real nice time to drop a coin or two! (bc devastatingly i am also trapped in this mundane capitalist hellscape w/ the rest of u suckers)

[egophiliac]

have you been keeping up with gavv? because holy hell, i think the beginning arc has been one of the strongest beginnings we've had. so many goddamn emotional moments and crazy good fights

oh Gavv has been excellent so far, I've been enjoying it a lot! :> Shoma's an absolutely delightful protagonist, and the balance between "cute silly candy shenanigans" and "urban fantasy crime noir" is...working surprisingly well, actually?

although it does lead to the show basically having two modes:

[twicearoundthebend]

Everyone who’s complaining about Hera being the mc of war of the Rohirrim- genuinely who do you think should be the mc instead??

Because I reread the story in the appendices, and I understand that she doesn’t even get a name in the book, but she’s literally the only character that’s there for all the action and doesn’t die partway through.

Her brothers? Dead. Helm Hammerhand? Dead. Her cousin? Gone for most of the battles. And it makes way more sense to focus on Helm’s daughter- someone with deep emotional ties to all this loss, and an emotional tie to the villain- as opposed to focusing on some random soldier or general

Just say you hate women and leave it at that, don’t try to justify it with ‘I just want it to be accurate to the books!’