#of course he didn't remember them all

[amarriageoftrueminds]

I dispute that it's indisputable! 😁

What we've got here (apart from shoddy retcon writing, typical MCU 🙄) is a problem of synecdoche.*

Shoddy writing/retcons:

Bucky in CATWS:

A) doesn't remember the Winter Soldier's mission earlier on the same week because he has been wiped.

(He goes back to his handlers to ask them where he knows Steve from. Pierce lies and says he's recognising him from earlier on in the week. And Bucky is like 'that sounds wrong but I don't know enough about my own memories to dispute it.')

B) post-wipe, Bucky doesn't remember this or Steve, again.

Bucky in CACW:

A) Wakes up after Zemo trigger-worded him and doesn't remember what the Winter Soldier just did, that same day (has to ask Sam and Steve what he did.)

Even though he hasn't been wiped!

But... he has received a head wound, thanks to accidentally knocking himself out ogling Steve's biceps Bucky you useless bisexual.

So it could be wipe/head-trauma = memory loss of last 'mission.'

B) Tells Tony he remembers 'them all'

but: i) it's Tony, he's trying to kill Bucky at the time, obviously he's not gunna be honest with that guy!  and: ii) we know Bucky is lying. 

(Because of the above 👆 and also because -- as @fearlessinger pointed out -- it's consistent with Bucky's pattern of behaviour of flat-out lying or eliding the truth about his own memories, turning his weakness into a strength, in order to get them to do XYZ.

And there is nothing wrong with him doing this. He doesn't owe anyone the details of his mind, not even Steve.)

Also note: Tony is someone who has already proven he doesn’t give a shit about Bucky’s innocence, he’s going to kill him even though he knows he’s innocent, as he says he doesn’t care. 

There’s no point Bucky wasting his breath telling the truth to this guy!

So whereas Bucky lies to Tony when Tony is trying to kill him, Bucky doesn’t lie to T’Challa when T’Challa is trying to kill him (’I didn’t kill your father’). 

Because, unlike Tony, T’Challa might be honourable enough to stop if he finds out Bucky is innocent, or reasonable enough to believe him. 

(Sadly, it doesn’t work. But the fact that T’Challa didn’t go on to kill Zemo, when he found out he had killed T’Chaka, bears out Bucky’s gut instinct that this is a man who could be reasoned with... Unlike short king.)

C) Bucky has shot Natasha twice, on missions as the Winter Soldier, but shows zero signs of remembering her -- and thus no signs of recognising her (which Nat comments on with exasperation, while the Winter Soldier is strangling her.)

.

Bucky didn't give Zemo a mission report on December 1991.

What Zemo asked Bucky about was where Bucky was kept in 1991.

He wanted to know that, because that's where the records of Bucky's missions are kept. On file. Not in Bucky's Swiss cheese head (sorry bb! 😭)

Zemo didn't need a mission report, as he already knew what happened. That's why he knew that that particular mission would be useful in his plot.

With Zemo canon seems to contradicts itself a little, because when Steve asks Bucky about what Zemo wanted, Bucky can't remember what he just did as the Winter Soldier... but with effort he can recall what Zemo was asking him about just prior.

During this sequence, we keep cutting back and fore between Zemo and Steve n' Co. So it's possible that Zemo asked Bucky about where he was kept in Siberia, before he was trigger-worded (ergo: not occluded by the Winter Soldier altered mind state), and this was while we were cutting away to Steve n' Co, and that's why Bucky is able to remember it later on.

The interesting implication is that, on top of erasing his memory of himself, Hydra's mind-wipes ONLY erase memories gained during periods of mind-control (ie. during missions). Not what was happening to Bucky immediately prior to being mind-controlled.

(IE. So after a wipe he might remember ...being taken out of cryo, being thawed, put in the chair, and the handler beginning to read the trigger words, etc... but then his memory is a blank for his whole mission, the period of actual mind-control. 🤔 Hmm... )

The headwound Bucky received probably doesn't block out memories as comprehensively as Hydra's mind-wiping technique.

(Sidenote: I wonder if Zemo ordered the Winter Soldier to take that roof helicopter and fly to Siberia, expecting the Avengers to follow him / not expecting the Avengers to fail to stop him, go there, find the record of the Starks deaths which would eventually cause a schism when they got round to viewing it, etc etc? If so, Steve catching Bucky would've thrown a wrench in those works. Maybe Zemo going to Siberia himself, shooting the other Soldiers and pulling the video out, might've been his Plan B? 🤔 )

Anyway, back on topic:

Bucky giving mission reports immediately post-op doesn't indicate that he is allowed to keep memories of his past missions, because he's delivering those reports before he is mind-wiped.

After he is wiped, canon shows (never mind tells!) he doesn't remember the mission.

(If TFATWS is allowed to ignore canon, frankly so are we!)

.

It's self-contradictory to posit that Bucky is somehow both a living database of past Hydra missions and cannot trust if his memories are real or reliable.

It's either one or the other; it can't be both. Hydra can't be relying on Bucky for accurate mission reports if he can't say whether or not what he remembers is accurate.

While it's a common headcanon, nothing in canon (tie-in books don't count) suggests that Bucky is unsure of the reality of the memories he has, post escape from Hydra.

Bucky knows what he remembers is real; it's the not-remembering that's the problem. The absence of memories, not the quality of memories.

(Frankly, they haven't given him enough screen time to establish something as complex as extant-but-unreliable memories!)

The idea he has no emotional attachment to his memories is, likewise, directly contradicted by canon where it's this very emotional attachment to his returning memories that breaks Bucky out of mind-control in CATWS.

In CACW, it's been two years since Bucky was last mind-controlled and brain-damaged, and has been free to heal his mind and write down everything he recalls.

He knows he didn't plant that bomb, he knows that he doesn't do things like that any more, and he doesn't hesitate to protest his innocence to Steve, or even to strangers.

This is not the behaviour of a man who is unsure about who he is or what he has done. 

This is the behaviour of a man who is certain of the content of his memories. He knows who he is.

Look at him talking to the fruit stall holder, too. That's Bucky. That's not someone confused about who they are or lacking an identity.

So Bucky's personality is not absent before he gets a headwound...

(Neither was Clint's under Loki's control -- deleted scenes prove this -- Clint and Erik Selvig were themselves under Loki's control, they were just.... controlled. The Mind Stone’s subtle mind-control is not comparable to Hydra’s blunt ‘erase his entire personality’ mind-control; and in any case, Bucky is not under the influence of that erasing mind-control, while recovering his personality. Also, Bruce; waking up after Hulk gets a head wound doesn't mean Bruce's personality didn't exist properly until Hulk got a head wound.)

...It's just that, coincidentally prior to the head wound, Bucky was surrounded by people he couldn't trust so much. 

(Because they were, variously, trying to kill him, Warmachine, CIA agents, a creepy shrink, Captain America who was there to arrest him, etc.) 

IMO, Bucky loosened up after the headwound because it coincided with him finding out he really could trust Steve (see below 👇), and because of relief that he still had his memories when he awoke -- that the headwound hadn't taken them.

Thinking about it... this must be Bucky's first ever experience of waking up after mind-control and brain-damage to discover that he is still himself, he still has his memories, even the ones from long before! 🤔

Compared to everything else he suffered in the movie thus far, no wonder he was cheerful!

He didn't suddenly develop his personality again. He already had it, he was just Going Through It, before. 😤

.

Prior to that...

He is not tense because he's still the Winter Soldier. He is tense because he is Bucky Barnes (as he tells Zemo), and Bucky Barnes has PTSD, of which hypervigilance is a symptom. 

And when Steve shows up in full Captain America regalia and says 'do you know me?'

...Well, who is he asking about?

Captain America, or Steve?

Bucky's answer is ambiguous because the question itself is ambiguous, not because the content of his memories is ambiguous, or his sense of self.

He is only nervous (as Steve notes) because he doesn't know whether he is facing his friend Steve or Captain America, Here In his Official Capacity.

(And he's right to be nervous because, technically, it's the latter -- good instincts, Buck!)

So Bucky is facing what looks like Captain America, and nervously disclaiming. Calling him Steve to try and switch Cap from Official Mode back into safe mode (his friend, Steve). Kind of like the inversion of Steve asking ‘which Bucky am I talking to?’ (Nonsense question, writers, there’s only one!) 

But Steve -- perhaps flustered by Sam's voice in his ear -- doesn't realise this.

He thinks what Bucky is seeing is plain old Steve Rogers, standing in front of him, asking 'do you know who I am?' (Just a boy, standing in front of another boy, asking him to love him)

Whereas in fact he is dressed in full Cap gear, complete with shield and cowl, and asking in a grim voice. So it's actually Captain America standing in front of The Winter Soldier, asking The Winter Soldier in a grim a voice if he knows who Captain America is.

So that's the question Bucky answers. 

He's not lying, precisely. He's just... not answering the question Steve thinks he's asking. 

He's not confused.

On that note:

"It always ends in a fight."

This is a statement from a man who knows something from experience. Not a man who is unsure of what his experience actually is.

(If Seb had delivered this line nervously, as if he was unsure? That would be different. But he didn't...)

.

*Synecdoche: (ie. in this case, one dream being taken as a flashback and one flashback being taken as evidence of the existence of multiple flashbacks, multiple memories.)

The idea that TFATWS proves Bucky remembers them all...

...does it tho??

IIRC, in canon we only see one dream Bucky has about a mission.

But that doesn't prove:

a) that he remembers all of them,

b) that that dream is a memory.

The show doesn't explicitly say that that nightmare is a memory. Even in therapy, when his 'therapist' discusses his nightmares, neither she nor Bucky describes them as memories or flashbacks.

Plus, we know that Bucky must have looked up the details of 'his' crimes in an external source.

Nothing in the nightmare we saw would explain how Bucky knows who that kid he shot was, who the kid's dad was, where his dad (Yori) currently lives, etc etc.

Bucky could not have plucked any of that information out of the nightmare we saw. And the kid wasn't important, he was just a bystander / collateral damage, so his name wouldn't have been part of an original mission Hydra briefing, for example. 

So we know Bucky got intel on these missions from somewhere else.

To this end... Bucky having a List of all the 'Winter Soldier's victims' doesn't prove he remembers them. It only proves he has a List. 

But because we don't know where the names on the List came from, we can't say they came from his memories. 

We do know that it's part of the conditions imposed upon Bucky in order for him to receive a pardon.

(Rule Number 3: he has to 'Make Amends' to those on the List. He even has to do it in a particular way (Rules 1 & 2), trot out an Official Catchphrase while doing so, and give them a customer service smile. 😬 Poor guy!)

The whole thing is officially sanctioned.

So if anything it looks like the government has said to Bucky 'in order to get a pardon you need to make a List of who your victims were, and who benefited from your missions, and then make amends to/about everybody on that List -- without doing anything illegal or hurting anyone, which we won't really bother to supervise, if y’know what I mean -- and keep us up to date until it's done.'

It could be that he has been getting case files (he must have, to know what he knows), to decide who should go on the List, and find their deets, and that revisiting these case files has been giving Bucky nightmares. 😥

But that doesn't prove the List came from Bucky's memories! 

The nightmares only get mentioned in therapy because they're talking about the Amends, which are apparently not helping with the nightmares. This seems like a weak attempt to imply a connection -- as if the List was established from/for the nightmares (which may or may not be memories), and the Amends are meant to make Bucky feel better about them to reduce his nightmares (bullshit!).

But that can't be... because the pardon (of which the List/Amends are a condition) predates the nightmares. It’s a bit of a chicken/egg scenario.

We never saw Bucky having nightmares, in canon, prior to the existence of this Pardon/List -- even though we saw him sleep (also note no sign of nightmares when he’s in Louisiana, not thinking about the List!) 

To me it seems like cause and effect: that researching for the pardon/List is exposing Bucky to new explicit details of the Winter Soldier’s missions, which is giving Bucky nightmares and making him feel worse. 😕

“That line was an interesting moment. At the time, the choice I was making is that [Bucky] had realized there was no way he was getting out of there, and someone was gonna die, whether it was gonna be him, Steve or Tony. When he says that line, to me, it was a turning point — he was, like, ‘Okay, I know what you want me to say, and I’m just gonna say it.’ When someone comes at you over and over again, and they can’t hear you, they can’t see you’re pleading with them, you’re trying to figure out how to get through to them and they just won’t accept it, at some point you just give in, and you go, ‘that’s right, that’s what you want.’ Of course [Bucky] didn’t remember them all.” —  Sebastian Stan

[canisalbus]

I find little Machete being happy over bread baking to be so endearing, especially because I can imagine a world in which helping with baking was one of the few childhood joys he had (due to the lack of art of him happy as a pup), and then remembering the art you did months back of modern Machete making a souffle, I can see reincarnated Machete being drawn towards baking in his free time due to those residual feelings from his past life.

.

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

"Jason was the happy robin" this, "jason was the angry robin" that. Let's all be fully honest here Jason was the lonely robin

[witheredgardenparty]

I will never forgive a single one of you

[carcarrot]

OH MY GOD A YEAR AGO TODAY .

[sysig]

Special Counseling (Patreon)

[softquietsteadylove]

Hello darling, can you give us your headcanons of the Mermaid Au pettry please 😊🩷

Mermaid time!!!

Thena and Ikaris were the kids who were always getting into fights. Like, alarming fights--parents would worry about ripped fins and torn scales. But when some big sharp tooth was giving Thena a hard time, Ikaris tackled him and dragged him all the way down to the bottom of a completely dark chasm. He held him down there and dared him to ever hit his sister again.

Thena does love Ikaris, deep (deep, deep, deep down). He's an annoying big brother, but she knows he cares. But she still doesn't let him near Gil; she took the drowning incident very personally.

Thena makes a point to go and visit Makkari more often after having been accused of being the type of mer to only spend time with her mate and forget her friends. She was completely mortified and offended by this, and now swims out to see her once a week. She does not make a point to see Ikaris before she goes home again--if it happens, it happens.

Thena has taken Gil exploring a few times. She holds his hand while they swim around little reefs and such. He explained snorkeling to her but she doesn't like the idea that he could explode. She just stays with him, passing air from her lungs into his as he needs (not that this can be carried on for an especially long time).

Sersi loves Thena. She doesn't care at all that Thena is a mermaid, she's just so happy to finally have a sister after dreaming of one for years. And Thena is so curious about everything, she's happy to let Sersi take her shopping and try on makeup and different hairstyles on her. Gil thinks it's sweet they get along so well.

Thena has tried asking Sersi questions about intercourse and Sersi refuses to even broach the subject, no matter how curious she is about the biological systems of mer reproduction. Thena gave her a loose 'birds and the bees' type explanation of it, although Sersi isn't totally clear on the logistics.

Gil hasn't told Thena about any of his ex-girlfriends. Not that there are many, but he just doesn't think she really needs to know.

Gil has asked about mer reproduction solely out of concern. He managed to kind of explain condoms and what they're for. Thena told him there was no need to worry, since she had no plan of laying eggs at any point in time. Gil - having not known literal eggs were involved - nearly spat out his coffee, and now he can't enjoy boba.

Thena is obsessed with boba.

Gil is still a little overprotective, but he lets Thena go out by herself sometimes. If he's going to be late, he'll radio the house. She can swim to the mainland and get changed in a secret spot. She likes going to the grocery store so she can see all the different foods.

She doesn't like shoes, but Gil is determined to find her as many pairs as possible, because she keeps managing to destroy them. She has no concept of being careful with them so she'll do things like sprint across rocky terrain in delicate sandals and break them.

Gil has asked if mers have mating tokens. She brings up her necklace but he means more like engagement rings or some such. She says they don't, although really if one were to find something incredibly rare and precious, like a fancy pearl or something, one would only give it to their mate.

Thena bites him sometimes. Not hard, but it's kind of an instinct for her. And she still hisses at things that are too loud or smell bad.

Thena with her legs on is a few inches shorter than Gil, but with her tail on, her total length is roughly two metres.

[servuscallidus]

Reading Stazio's Thebaid (and watching L'Odissea 1968 rai miniserie), it's terrifying how the greek gods mess with people's minds to reach their ends. Zeus wants to destroy two cities, Thebes and Argo, and instead of bringing about a forerunner Sodom and Gomorrah (or second, I'm fuzzy on the timeline), he plants the thought in Etheocles' mind that he want to keep the kingship for himself and inspires bloodlust and a desire for war in the youths of Argo. He puppets the two cities by effectively stripping their leaders of wants, thoughs and personality and puppeteering them into a war no one wanted. We don't even know if the desire to keep Thebes was always there in Etheocles or if it's all Zeus' creation.

Basically, it never matters what a mortal wants, not because a god can effortlessly overpower them, but because a god can easily make it so that they never wanted anything other than what the god desires them to want. It's horrible. You can never know if what you wish and think is truly something that comes from you or if a god planted it so that you'd do their will

[bumblingbabooshka]

Tuvok just has a sort of ‘mutiny against me’ vibe to his leadership style that the ensigns in his care don’t appreciate

[guidingthulite]

the fun part about me finally watching yokai gakuen is that when i watched the movie like 3 years ago i joked about jinpei having comphet but guys. i don't think it's a joke anymore

[tenok]

The point (one of them) is that both Aziraphale and Crowley actually think they the smartest one in any given situation. And since I relate to Aziraphale much more today I get fixated on his brand of superiority. He starts his journey with rebellion from pretty tame "I don't get why they makes this desisions and it's look horrible on surface evel but I'm sure that they get best ineterests of everyone involved in their hearts and it's probably me the one that didn't get some oblivious detail" to "oh okay I'm sure it's some kind of misundestanding and we can all talk it out as adults because we there work on same goals" to frustrated "they won't ever listen to me and I will get in trouble for arguing and it will be better for everyone if I will make my desisions in secret and go behind their backs because I just can't let THEM make desisions that will destroy everything". It's not straightforward, I'm 30 and still circulate sometimes between "what if it's me the one that wrong aout everything" and "god HOW people can be THAT stupid", but I remember going throught this stages first as good and obedient kid with really stupid parents making stupid desisions and later with school, govermnet, activist spaces etc.

And the problem is, I was the smartest person in the room enough time to develop issues, and Aziraphale lives like his for 6000 years at least. I can only imagine how many times he thought "if only Starmaker listen to me and didn't Fall", "if only God listened to me and didn't make an Apocalypse happen", "if only Heavens listened to me and didn't did this or that that thing", "if only Crowley listen to me and understand in what kind of danger we can get", "if only that human listened to me and haven't dig the body", etc etc. It's awful, to be the one who always gets to say "I told you so", especially when there's such awful consequenses you can't even feel satisfaction, and you will be the one to clen this mess up (and Aziraphae will clean, or better try to prevent). Now, it's of course leads to issues. BIG issues.

1) It's really hard to stop being plotting and maciavellian and communicate things properly when you expect that person will at best argue with you, at worst punish you and double down on their stupid desisons and you will clean this mess up. It also really hard to stop trying to control everything because you already accepted that everything is your responsibility and everyone else would just make things worse. (as someone that relates to Aziraphale I think he did so much progress there, the levels or trust he shows Crowley are amazing for two beings that probably last time heard of psychotherapy when Freud was alive. but such trust is fragile thing, one misstep and you back on your "it will be better if I do everything alone" bullshit. I'm not saying it's good. I'm also not saying that it's bad. it's just how things work)

2) It makes you overstep other people authonomy, because, again, it would be better for everyone if they did what you think best for them. It works funny wih Aziraphale because yes he's all for free choices for humanity!! NOW GO AND DO SMART CHOICES DAMN YOU!!! WHY YOU DON'T PICK THE THING THAT WOULD BE SMART TO PICK I HATE YOU ALL. That's where me and Aziraphale difer a little because at least I somewhat good at stepping into other people shoes and understand why they do what they do. But angel there is autistic (or bad at this specific thing for other reasons), so I think when people he consider reasonable doesn't agree with him for their own reasons he ge's really baffled, like, there arE correct opinion and it's mine, WHY are you being difficult?? to spite me?? And I'm sure that half of the reason why Aziraphale's so comfortable with Crowley is that he perfectly happy to let him buly or manipulate him into doing things Aziraphale picks as right. Usually Crowley know where pick his battles and how to play long game to make Aziraphale agree for really important stuff he wants from him, but otherwise? Sure he will complain how he hates Hamlet but they will watch Hamlet, and Aziraphale will be very pleased with himself. (and than there goes final fifteen and we back at "but WHY won't ypu agree with thing I pick or us IT'S GOOD AND RESONABLE THING" and we should be happy that consent is something that imporant for our angel ok? he would be angry with Crowley for picking wrong but he won't make him do what he doesn't want. they respect each other like that.)

3) It makes you really really tired and tense. You control everything, unfortunately the longer you do it the more things starts really depedend on you, you can't let go, you don't know anyone that can share this burden with you because first they should prove that they won't blow his up and for this you should share at least something with them, but what is they would blow it up? Better be safe than sorry. And look when it's my problems it's credit cards and doctor appointmens and with Aziraphale we talk about people dying. Crowley dying. Now, as I said, he actually shows Crowley so. much. trust. for someone with such issues. Because Crowley was there for 6000 years, and he proved himself capable enough times. But still there's areas where let go and not worry would be impossible for Aziraphale, Crowley's safety being one of such things (you see, you can risk with your life when you deal with your problems because whatever you will clean shit up if needed, but if someone close to you hurt themself?? it's YOUR problem too but it will be SO MUCH HARDER to clean. I think when Aziraphale points to Crowley that hell would be harder on him than he can expect heavens to punish him, it's partially because he believes it's true and partially because he knows how to minimize harm when heavens angry with him but HOW can he do this for Crowley??). Anyway. Lol. The more I think about it the more I sure that Crowley without Aziraphale would be a miserable angry dick, and Aziraphale wihout Crowley would be dead, because it was the one person that kept him one tiny slip away from total burn out.

So yeah there's a lot of posts about how angry heartbroken etc Crowley will be with Aziraphale (I don't agree but that's for other post), less posts about how sad and heartbroken will be Aziraphale, but I hope to see Azyraphale being angry too (it they will be angry with each other at all). Not only for not picking him or leaving or making everything messy and emotional and wasting their first kiss at their fight etc, but also because Aziraphale was trusting him! Trusting that he get another resonable adult in team with him! Someone who he can trust to make resonable desisions and see his ideas as clever and him as capable and being willing to go to the end of the world with him with mild complaints and than!! When he did trust him to understand!! He was like everyone else!! Unresonable and emotional and angry with him and why he asked him at all he should've do it secretly and alone as always and it would've be as usual and it wouldn't hurt but it was Crowley that taught him to trust and to ask him for help!! Breaking his perfectly fine coping mechanisms!! It's all his faut if you think about it huh?? (but of course he's already forgiven. but also Aziraphale would do what he needs to do alone this time, as one and only capable adult in the world.)

Anyway it's not a meta it's just some late night thoughts. And it's in no way whole analizis there's so much more problems inside this angel. It's just something in particular that resonated with me today. Also it's not in any way critisizm of him, mind you, because a) he does really the smartest person in the room most of the time and b) I LOVE how fucked up in the head he is!!! I think he needs to become even more fucked up actually!!! and Crowley should love him for that and I will cheer for him from sidelines!!!

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

i feel like we don't talk abt any of the tooltip quotes very often but out of all of one this one makes me particularly curious because it implies at least an assumption that some form of 'perma-death' is potentially possible within the constant. or maybe even that something might happen to ghosts who stay ghosts for too long? whatever 'lost' is meant to imply, it can't be talking about turning into a ghost, or they wouldn't be using the word 'nearly', since you can only use telltales as a ghost.

i mean, not like wilson has ever been known for knowing much about what hes talking about. especially when it doesn't pertain to science. but its less about what actually is and isnt possible and more about what they think is potentially possible thats of real interest here

[nexus-nebulae]

thinking abt the time our middle school science teacher made us write superhero fanfic for a genetics project

[t3tr0m1n0]

i can't pretend i'm immune to coming away from a story with One Dude who's very particularly special to me but at the very least there's like 85% odds that he ends up transfemme in my brain

[fluffypotatey]

got bored so here's

Characters in BBC Merlin that i think had potential to add even cooler story arcs to the show if they didn't die/get ignored for the most part

in no particular order

Tristan & Isolde

Cornelius Sigan

Nimueh

Aithusa

Will

Alice

Freya

or you know, we just got more with the Ladies of the Lake

Elena

Vivian

Mithian

Mary the barmaid

Leon, Percival, Gwaine, Elyan, Lancelot

Deagal

[maddieandangel-2]

Yeah I'm doing it

The transcript for my messages is below

Most of it except the last section is just a plot summary but. shhhhh whatever

---

And finally, THIS EPISODE

(Honestly this one doesn't even need to be seen as romantic it's really cute regardless,,,,,)

First off I screenshotted the title screen before I even started the episode for Obvious Reasons ඞඞඞ

I already knew that an episode titled "The Fungus Amongus" was coming up because I'd looked through the playlist, but they also had to do the font in RED?

But anyway. The episode was actually really good, despite it bringing back a Master Belch fuckin lookalike villain who I did not particularly enjoy the first appearance of

The returning villain found a fungus that eats through metal, and he wanted to use it to get revenge on 1. Betty, 2. The entire Galactic Association by destroying their HQ

And this is one of those rare episodes where the Big Potential Danger To Robots actually *does* affect X-5!

X-5 gets attacked by the fungus after it attacks the crew's spaceship, and is taken hostage by the episode's villain. And Yeah! He is Very Much in danger of Actually Dying! The villain threatens as such, unless they tell him the location of the Galactic Headquarters.

And X-5 is like “yeah no, no Galactic Guardian would *ever* tell you that, no matter what.” So the villain makes good on his threat and sics the fungus on him.

And as the fungus starts to eat away at X-5's protective shield coating, Sparky blurts out the coordinates. Sparky. NOT Betty. Betty was panicked too, but it actually seems like she wasn't going to say anything? She even covers Sparky's mouth after he gives the location. (Not that I'm bashing her though)

Sparky was willing to put the entirety of the Galactic Headquarters at risk to save X-5’s life.

Read it whatever way you want, platonic, romantic, whatever, it's still just— OUGH. He CARES. Despite all his jabs and teasing, Sparky DOES genuinely really care about X-5!!

And yeah sure, knowing Sparky, he probably wasn't thinking about all the long-term consequences of revealing the Galactic HQ's location (unlike Betty and X-5). Especially since he and Betty only had like 6 seconds to make a decision. But he still would've known that doing that would be Bad, and he still chose X-5 over it anyway.

It later turns out that the fungus can be eradicated by some soup Sparky had been making before everything went down ((which, by the way, he was making for X-5 to help with a ‘cold’ that he had—which was likely more something akin to an allergic reaction right before the fungus attacked the ship))

But when Betty asks Sparky for some of the soup, having figured out the fungus’ weakness, Sparky's like “okay, but this is hardly the time to be eating, you know!”

SPARKY.

THE GUY WHO'S ALMOST CONSTANTLY EATING, NO MATTER THE SITUATION.

Even Sparky himself is surprised he said that.

Then at the end, once HQ has been saved from the swarm of fungus, DeGill wonders aloud how the villain even managed to find its location, X-5 rats Sparky out. And y'know what, I'm just gonna give you the transcript for the conversation:

X-5: That was Sparky. He gave away the location.

Sparky: Hey, I only did that to save you, you ungrateful sardine can!

X-5: Ungrateful sardine can..? Truth is, you like me! *He leans in for what I am choosing to interpret as a hug* You really like me!

Sparky: Do not!

X-5: Do to!

Sparky: Do not!

X-5: Do t-

Sparky: Not!

X-5: Do!

Sparky can try to deny it all he likes, but the truth is obvious <3. And I just think the scene is really cute?? X-5 seems so happy to know that Sparky does genuinely care about him.

---

It does make me wonder though about X-5 maybe being a little insecure about his place in the crew? Because of how happy and relieved he is to get confirmation that Sparky cares about him, and also one of his lines earlier in the episode, “I didn't know Sparky cared that much about... Metal.” (which. AUGH? You are so much more than just metal, my boy!! Don't let anyone make you think otherwise).

But it would kinda make sense for him to be worried about that. In some ways, he could kinda be seen as the most 'replaceable' member of the crew? I say this with him as my favourite character, and I don't think Betty or Sparky would think that, but like. X-5 is very heavily connected to their Star Cruiser. He can still exist and function just fine away from it, but the two are a package deal. And if the crew wanted to upgrade to a new, more advanced ship, it would come with a new robot companion (as seen in Bye-Bye X-5 from Season 1). Which would mean X-5 wouldn't really be 'needed' anymore, and he and the old Star Cruiser could be abandoned sent to 'retirement' in Crushton. So in a way, X-5's 'worth' is tied to how useful he is to his crew.

Now, I do believe (or at least fuckin hope) that Betty and Sparky care enough about X-5 as a person to want to keep him around even as they upgrade the rest of their technology. But I could still understand X-5 feeling anxious about the whole thing—and thus being very very happy and relieved when his crew proves that they do care about his well-being, even if, logically, they could just find another robot to perform his duties and replace him if he were to die.

I do kinda wish this episode took place much earlier in the series' timeline, though. I'd love for it to mark a turning point in X-5 and Sparky's relationship, where this is where X-5 realizes that Sparky does genuinely like him in spite of what all his insults may suggest (meanwhile he's always deeply respected Betty as a leader, and Betty's never treated him too poorly). But... By the time The Fungus Amongus takes place, the crew have been Galactic Guardians for multiple years at that point. The idea that X-5 has been insecure about his place in the team for that long makes me sad.