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flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash · 3 years ago

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Irresistible Danger - Part 59

Synopsis: After being caught outside the compound on your own, Negan decides to punish you in the best way possible ;)

Words: 4,078

Warnings: nsfw, smut, swearing

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*HIATUS WARNING*

This will be my last chapter update until the end of July or very beginning of August, due to me joining Camp Nano. If people are interested, I can link my nano page HERE if you want to see what progress I make. I haven’t created a Camp project goal yet, but I’ll be adding it soon.

Clearing the Board

You stared at Negan in shock for a long moment, your brain’s frantic whirring grinding to a screeching halt as the subconscious watched with mouth so agape that the gum it had been chewing fell unnoticed to the floor.

Had he been thinking the same questions as you the entire dinner? Part of you wanted to bolt, terrified to know what was on his mind. Was this where he pulled the rug out from under you and said things were getting too cozy, that he wanted to back track? Did he want to go back to his wives? Or maybe he wanted to try and make you into another one of them?

Breathe. Just breathe and see what he has to say, before you start hyperventilating.

Clearing your throat and licking suddenly dry lips, you hoarsely said, “Uh...yeah...we do.”

As if this was the permission he was waiting for, he gave a curt nod and started talking. He was so focused and straight to the point that you wondered if he had rehearsed this prior to you showing up. If so, he had done a much better job of preparing than you had.

“I wanted to apologize for last night. Not just for the way I attacked you, though I do fucking apologize for that, but for how I acted after.”

At this, he paused and ran a hand slowly down over his mouth and beard, and you realized how difficult this conversation was for him, how much he still struggled to be open and honest and sincere with another human when he’d had to learn the hard way to be tough and mean and impenetrable. It made you feel validated regarding your own struggles, as well as grateful that both of you were stepping outside your comfort zones and trying to communicate.

“Doll, there’s just some shit that I don’t like to fucking relive. It has to happen, whether I fucking want it to or not, and once it’s done, it’s done. I don’t always want to rehash events, or talk about how I feel, because the answer is probably that I feel like fucking horse shit. It’s nothing personal against you, it’s just me wanting to fucking move on. The same way you told me the other night that I gotta trust you not to always give me all the fucking details? Well, same goes when the shoe’s on the other fucking foot.”

You sat there and took this in, brain having pulled out a tablet to take frantic notes, and subconscious still staring in shock with its foot unknowingly stepping right in the middle of the dropped gum wad. Of all the ways for tonight’s conversation to go, no part of you had expected Negan to not only take the lead, but go in the correct direction needed to pulverize one of the newly-created questions you had thrown into the padlocked box.

Once he said the words out loud, it did make a lot of sense. You had seen it as wanting to connect with him and support him, if he would just explain what had happened on the run to upset him. However, some things might be better left unsaid, so as not to make the person relive the events and the emotions tied to them. What you had seen as him shutting you down was actually him trying to move on from unsavory events (and actions he’d had to complete in his role as leader). Add to that his comparison to your conversation the other night, where you had expected him to be okay with you not giving all details about certain events, and you couldn’t believe how much you had blown his recent actions out of proportion.

You had been quiet for a few long moments, during which he was watching you closely. He tried to make his expression neutral, but the unnatural stillness of his tensed body and the focused intensity of his hazel gaze gave away how much weight he was putting on what your response might be.

Picking your words carefully, you broke the silence. “Thank you for explaining that, because I did wonder why you turned down my offer to talk last night. I respect your right to not tell me everything about what you have to do in order to keep control of the Sanctuary and other communities. However,” you held his gaze, making sure he saw your sincerity. “I want you to know that I’m always here for when and if you do want to talk about it. Any of it.”

He was unresponsive for a few seconds, as if the tables had turned and now he was the one a bit surprised at how calm and clearly you had voiced your agreement. Then, a soft smile broke across his face, and he said, “I know you are, doll.”

You gave a small smile, beyond relieved to have that topic discussed and out of the way. Your brain was proud of the two of you for talking it out, while the subconscious was preoccupied with cursing and hopping around on one foot while frantically trying to use a stick to scrape the smeared gum off the bottom of its shoe. Like it, you now flailed about for how to move on to other concerns. The door of communication had been opened, and you didn’t want him to slam it shut now that the thing he’d wanted to get off his chest was done.

“There’s some other things I think we need to talk about,” you said. When his eyebrows raised in a nonverbal for you to continue, you started nervously fidgeting with your dinner napkin.

Shit, where did you even start? How to accurately say what you were thinking and feeling about this relationship with him. He had obviously noticed you pulling back that day in the woods, and while you had been quick to start blurting your feelings when in a post-orgasmic haze, the words now stuck in your throat and refused to come out.

That ball of self-doubt was creeping in, telling you to shut the box back up and get out of there. It whispered how maybe now that Negan had fucked you, the “game” was almost over and he wouldn’t be as interested. That the moment you started placing expectations on the two of you, he’d tell you to leave his rooms and not come back.

Looking down at the napkin, which was now twisted and crumpled from anxious hands, you tossed it down on the table and abruptly stood up, unable to continue the farce of sitting still. You pushed the chair into the table and stood there for a few seconds before giving a frustrated groan and pacing over to his armoire and back.

It was quite the role reversal, you pacing back and forth while he sat there, silently watching. Your hands gestured wildly in front of you, as if trying to act out what you couldn’t say. You started to talk a few times, but it came out as a sputter of nothingness, causing you to pace back and forth yet again. After a couple rounds of this, you finally stopped behind the dinner chair, hands gripping the back of it until your knuckles turned white. The two of you stared at one another, his forehead furrowed in concern at your mini meltdown.

“Doll,” he said, voice low and calming. “Tell me.”

Just say it. Tell him you’ve fallen for him.

But you couldn’t. The emotions were right there, but it didn’t feel right to just blurt them out. Three little words that some people tossed around like pennies, and you couldn’t say them when it mattered.

You looked at him desperately, willing him to throw a lifeline and take back over the conversation, to tell you to forget it and act like this moment had never happened. Instead, he finally moved into action, standing from his own chair and rounding the small table to stand in front of you.

He didn’t reach out, didn’t try to hold you, as if he knew that the slightest touch would cause your taut as a bowstring form to burst into a million pieces. His hands instead clenched at his sides in a nonverbal show of restraint. He knew that whatever you were struggling with was important, while at the same time realizing he couldn’t force it, and that the direction of the conversation depended entirely on you.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

There was more authority to his tone this time, but it was the slight hint of worry making it go up in pitch at the end that propelled your own voice to finally get its shit together and start working.

“There’s nothing wrong, I just…I don’t know how to say it.”

“Fucking say what? You’re killing me here, doll.”

You looked at him, took in this strong and seemingly impenetrable, yet surprisingly caring and passionate man who had shattered all of the emotional defenses you had strategically built in order to keep yourself safe. And suddenly, you knew exactly how to tell him in a way that he, and only he, would understand.

“Remember when you said that the game is over when the king is captured?”

Surprise flickered in his gaze, as he obviously wasn’t expecting that to come out of your mouth. However, he quickly caught up, giving a curt nod.

“I know technically the queen is expendable, and the game can continue on without her, but-” voice cracking a bit, you paused to take a deep breath before continuing. “What the hell does one do when the opposite happens?”

You saw the moment the realization hit, making him go completely still. Saw the moment he pieced everything together but still held back, as if afraid maybe he was misinterpreting it.

His face looked wrecked when he husked, “What are you saying, doll?”

Emotion welled in your eyes as you verbally let go, whispering the confession that had been held in for long enough.

“The king’s captured me.”

He broke the physical distance then, his eyes bright with emotion as he wrapped one arm around your waist and cupped your face with a warm palm. Leaning down, he placed a kiss on your lips that was so soft and gentle you almost wanted to cry. When he lifted his head, you felt overwhelmed by the adoration in his gaze, but that was nothing compared to the words he then spoke.

“Well doll, I’d say that’s only fucking fair, since the queen’s captured me too.”

Shock coursed through you, followed by a rush of emotion so strong it would’ve knocked you on your ass if he wasn’t there to clutch onto.

He feels the same! Holy fuck, not only did he understand, but he also feels the same!

The two of you kissed again, long and slow, until your surroundings faded away and there was only him. It could’ve been mere moments or long minutes before your lips parted from his, as time currently had no meaning outside the count of his breaths on your face and beat of his heart under your palm flattened on his chest.

You felt dizzyingly happy, and the padlocked box was tons of pounds lighter. However, there were still a few spiky balls of questions sitting in the bottom of it, and it was time to empty them out. All of them.

“So,” you said, fingers tracing up over his exposed collarbone and strong throat. “What happens next, after the king and queen capture each other?”

Giving a much softer version of his usual devilish smirk, he replied, “They lay down their weapons, recall their fucking armies, and rule the board together.”

Grinning like a fool at that, you wound your arms up around his neck and murmured hesitantly, “So what does that mean for the others? What does the king do with the five of them?”

Once again, the metaphor was not lost on him, and you felt the slightest stiffening of his body against yours as he pulled his lips from where they had been tracing along your ear lobe and looked down at you.

Shit, did you go too far? Maybe you should’ve just stopped while you were ahead and not crossed into that topic of conversation just yet…

“What do you want me to do with them, doll?”

You definitely weren’t expecting that as a response, as shown by your staring blankly up at him for a few seconds before saying, “Isn’t that your choice?”

He gave an amused tsk of disapproval. “No, that’s not how it works when we both rule the board. Each partner gets a say, and then we figure it out together.”

Did he just...call you… “Is that what I am?” you asked, heart inflating like a bubble at the possibility.

“I mean, we can stick with just calling you my queen, if that’s what you want, but I think partner also has a nice fucking ring to it.”

His partner. Not his wife, or girlfriend. Partner.

Stretching up to give him a kiss of approval, you said, “Partner is perfect.”

Deciding to go all in, you added, “And I only want you, no one else. I want you to be the person I snuggle up against each night, and the one whose bed I wake up in each morning knowing that I belong there. I want to walk proudly beside you and know that you’re mine, as much as I’m yours.” You hesitated, a small dart of worry at the brutally honest words making you feel the need to ask, “But what do you want?”

The playful light was back in his eyes, that sinful tongue running over his bottom lip. “I thought I already made that fucking obvious, doll. But if I didn’t, then listen very closely.”

His lips traced over your face, leaving butterfly kisses on your cheeks and nose and forehead as he spoke the words. “I want you. Fucking simple as that. I’ve wanted you, and only you, since the day you fucking kicked my ass at chess.”

This was technically information you already knew, thanks to Trixie, but hearing it from him made it that much more real. It was as if even though all the signs were there, you still didn’t want to fully believe you were the reason for his change in behavior with the wives, not until he confirmed it himself.

Trying to add a bit of lightness, you hummed in pleasure at his lips kissing the sensitive spot on the curve of your neck and quipped, “Who knew all it would take was a game of chess for me to stand out.”

Giving a huffed laugh, he said against your skin, “If you think that’s the only way you fucking stand out, you’re even more oblivious then I fucking thought.”

“Hey! Are you telling me I’m weird or something?” you laughed, playfully tugging at his hair so that he raised his head to look at you.

“Wellllll…” he joked, smiling broadly before his expression got a bit more serious. “In all honesty, doll, I’ve respected the hell out of you since the moment you arrived here.”

Eyebrows raising, you said, “Oh? Do go on.”

His eyes danced with mirth, but his words were uncharacteristically sincere. “Despite being scared shitless when my men first found your little group, you never fully submitted or lost your fight. You marched right into the Sanctuary like you were gonna own the whole fucking place, or at least own the kitchen, which you did in a ridiculously short amount of fucking time, I might add. I felt like a fool for asking you to be another wife and expecting you’d be happy just sitting around looking pretty.”

You gave a haughty grin, but let him continue, knowing that confessions such as this were few and far between with Negan. And you were going to soak in every affectionate word like a desert does the rain, because as much as the actions and nonverbals fed your heart, his words were what now fed your soul.

“I knew you’d be trouble the the first time I walked in the kitchen to check on things and you refused to fucking kneel with the others, staring me down in a way that said you were demanding to be treated at my equal, and just daring me to try and fucking do something about it. It was that same daring each time we were alone that drew me in like fucking catnip, and while the smart thing would’ve been to stay away, when I found you out in the fucking woods about to be walker chow and totally going against my orders, it gave me the perfect opportunity to force you closer. I knew I should stop sending for you, stop finding reasons to visit the kitchen or order you to bring me trays, but damn doll, you were too fucking exciting to walk away from.

“The day you beat me at chess, you were so fucking proud of yourself, and I realized that instead of being pissed, I was proud of you too. I knew I had a spitfire on my hands, and damn if that didn’t make my dick hard.” His voice lowered a bit, so that you held your breath in order not to miss a single word. “But it wasn’t until that first outing together in the woods, when you killed that walker and saved my fucking hide, that I realized I was done for. That I might as well throw down my crown because the king had been captured, and the game was over.”

You thought back to that day, to the kiss and the look in his eyes afterward. Had you known back then? Possibly, but you never would’ve admitted it to yourself, not at that point. You felt a lump start to form in your throat, eyes blinking rapidly in an effort not to tear up. And you would have succeeded, damn it, if not for his next words.

“I tried to fight it, to fight you. Hell I almost got you fucking killed by chasing you out of here, and all because of my own fucking stubborn pride. I’d never hated myself as much as I did in that moment, when we found you lying injured in the fucking woods. I’ve loved and lost, more than any man should, but...the thought of losing you was what almost ruined me.”

Tears trickled down your cheeks in cool rivulets. “Why didn’t you tell me?” you whispered. Hell, if you had known all of this a bit earlier, maybe you wouldn’t have hesitated to talk things out. Wouldn’t have held back as much as you did.

Giving a self-deprecating smile, he said, “Because I’m a fucking idiot. But also because every time I considered it, you’d fucking pull away. I would’ve claimed you publicly as mine weeks ago, but you about had a god damn heart attack anytime there was a chance someone might see us getting fucking cozy together. I could practically hear the fears and doubts whirring around in your head the last few days, so I took the coward’s way out and tried to halt those thoughts by repeatedly fucking you any chance I got, until you were too exhausted to overthink.”

He had meant the words to make you laugh, but instead you suddenly felt overwhelmed. Your stupid eyes wouldn’t stop watering, and if you weren’t careful your nose would start clogging up too. You had always been jealous as hell of women who could cry prettily, because you definitely weren’t one of them.

You tried to school your features, tried to put on at least a thin mask of “I’m fine, totally fine” but more tears followed by a hiccuped sob escaping your lips said otherwise. You unwrapped your arms from his neck in order to press a hand to your mouth in an effort to try and stifle the emotions leaking out.

“No,” he said, stern enough to jolt you out of the overanalyzing spiral your brain wanted to jump down.

Pulling your hand away from your mouth with a gentle but firm grip, he clasped it between his own hands. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” you asked.

Lifting one hand, he used his thumb to brush away the tear sitting stubbornly on the middle of your cheek. “Don’t do what you did last time. Don’t hide from me again.”

Sighing, you nodded in agreement. “Fine, but it would be nice if one of these times it was you crying and not me.”

Humor was a mask of its own, one both of you used to cover up emotions. However, since you were standing there with red-rimmed eyes and he had just verbally confessed his emotions more in the last few minutes than he probably had during the rest of the apocalypse combined, you both deserved a bit of humor.

“The day that happens, I might as well just chop off my dick and fucking hand that over as well,” he joked back, causing you to smile and shove at him playfully.

Giving an exasperated sigh, you said “I can’t believe I’ve been so dumb about all of this, thinking...well, assuming totally incorrect things. Guess that’s what I get for not trying to just talk it out.”

He gave you a mock-stern expression and said, “Well, then let this be a fucking lesson.” He used two fingers to point at your eyes and then at his own, and back to yours. “Partners, remember.”

God, you loved the way that word rolled off his tongue. It was exactly what you had always secretly hoped to find with a man: an equal partnership. Sure, Negan was still the leader of the Sanctuary and had the role of badass motherfucker to uphold, but at the heart of things you stood on equal ground, and your thoughts and feelings and opinions mattered just as much as his own. Not to mention, you would dare him to deny that you were the leader of the kitchen staff. And hey, there was a lot of power in being the one in charge of making sure the entire community was fed. And the fact that he didn’t want to take any of that away from you, that he was proud of your accomplishments, made you fall for him even more.

“Partners,” you agreed with a nod, running a hand up over his chest. Fingers traced his strong, masculine features before running up into his hair to map the streaks of salt among the pepper.

Eyes brightening with desire, he stared with laser focus down at your mouth, his nostrils flaring as he watched your teeth subconsciously nibble on your lower lip as you took in this handsome man who was yours. All yours. Seeing the intent in his gaze and knowing where this was about to go by the sudden tensing of his muscles for action, you pressed your other hand against his chest lightly and said, “Wait, one more thing. I have a request.”

“Name it,” he said without hesitation.

“Um...this might seem a bit random, but is there any way you could bump Simon up to having a single room?” When Negan looked at you in slight bewilderment, you continued, “That way Ben can visit whenever he wants.”

His brows lowered, and you were afraid he was going to dismiss the issue as not important, so you pressed on. “In all honesty, it was Ben’s insistence that I be honest and talk things out with you that helped push me to say what I did tonight. I kinda owe him.”

The unspoken words were that Negan kinda owed him too, and his scowl said that he heard them loud and clear. With a slight huff, he grumbled, “I’ll see what I can fucking do.”

Giving a wide smile, you stood up on tiptoe and planted a very grateful kiss on his lips, with tongue included. Pulling back a bit, you whispered against his mouth, “I’d love to see what you can fucking do.”

At that, he scooped you up into his arms with a growl and strode into the bedroom, where he then proceeded to spend a good portion of the night showing you just how thoroughly captured the king really was.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Extra Author’s Note: Holy crap, was I nervous af to post this chapter. I feel like so much has been building to this conversation between You and Negan, and I wasn’t sure how readers were going to feel about it. I know some people were expecting more drama and angst, especially since this is about the time that romance novels usually throw in the so-called “third act conflict”. However, I personally find it pretty annoying when that conflict is some form of unneeded miscommunication or lack of communication, followed by the characters being apart for a period of time and then coming back together in one grand gesture before bam, an abrupt ending where you’re to expect them to live happily ever after with no more issues.

Instead, I had You and Negan do that earlier in the fic, with the “Confrontation” chapter where they royally fucked up and had to stumble their way back together, followed later by the pregnancy test argument where they started to fuck up but then both broke their unhealthy fight cycle (You did this by walking away and Negan did it by going after her and deciding to actually listen). And now, with this chapter I wanted to showcase their growth and how they’ve learned enough from past mistakes to move forward. Some people might see this chapter as too fluffy, but I saw it as a way to show two grown ass adults finally laying down their emotional shields and communicating in an open and healthy manner. At this point, I thought Negan and You deserved that, and I hope y’all agree.

Whether you loved it, hated it, didn’t care, all of the above, etc, please feel free to let me know. I’m so so curious to hear what people thought of this chapter, and if what I was hoping to showcase came across in a satisfying way. Thanks for reading! I’ll be back with more updates after Camp Nano! <3

#negan #negan fanfiction #negan fanfics #irresistible danger #the walking dead #negan's thirst squad #ash writes #twd #negan fanfic #negan x you #negan x reader #slow burn #fanfic #fanfiction #twd negan #the walking dead negan #jdm #jeffrey dean morgan

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lumosinlove · 4 years ago

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Coast To Coast

Hi Hazelnuts!! The final chapter of Coast To Coast! The technical end of the SW universes. I can’t even believe it. Thank you all so much for loving these three boys--and all of my OCs. When I first started writing Sweater Weather, I didn’t expect people to care about the rest of the team. I am so thankful that you do. From me, Leo, Logan, and Finn, thank you, thank you, and bitch ass moves.

Love, Haz

part ix

tw: brief minor panic attack

Finn could relive it when he closed his eyes.

They’d ducked into a dark room at Hogwarts stadium, empty save for some spare equipment. The noise had been loud even from within, or maybe it just rang in Finn’s ears. He’d hoisted the Cup. They’d won on home ice. He’d pressed his lips to Logan and Leo’s cheeks out there—and some others, for good measure—and now all he wanted was to do this. Finn had not so much gotten his breath back before he had been kissing them. He could feel Leo and Logan, their hands gripping his uniform just as tightly as he held theirs.

“The Conn Smyth,” Finn remembered saying into Logan’s mouth. The kisses had been beyond sloppy, and Finn had everything. The Cup. Logan. Leo.

He had everything. Right then, he didn’t even mind that no one knew it. He knew it. His family knew it. The people that mattered knew it.

Leo’s mouth had dragged up Logan’s neck and met Finn’s in an effort to kiss Logan, too.

“Hat trick,” Leo said. Leo had stripped himself of his goalie pads, and knelt, right there on the rough carpet, long legs jammed between Logan and the door. He had pushed Logan against the shelves and undone Logan’s pants, pulling his jock aside and his spandex, getting at his cock. Logan was already a little hard when Leo took him in his mouth, nose bumping the swell of his jock. When he moved, his jersey rustled against his padded pants, mixing with Logan’s breathing. Logan leaned into Finn’s side, a moan punching out of his mouth.

“Leo—”

“Shh, baby,” Finn said, and turned Logan’s head so that he could kiss him, mumbling into his mouth. He reached down to cup his balls, thumb stroking Leo’s lip. “Kiss me now.”

Logan did, Finn silencing his sounds. Their fingers were tight in Leo’s hair.

Logan had been shaking a little under their mouths. He was half-laughing, half-panting, green eyes bright and pupils blown. He’d whined low in his throat as he came, as they both kissed his neck, fingers in their damp hair. His skin had tasted like the champagne from the locker room, and when Finn kissed Leo, Leo’s mouth had, too—from drinking it out of the Stanley Cup.

The Cup.

There had been Pascal’s, too, and kisses without having to hide, and clinging clothes in the pool. And then they were home, alcohol filtering out of their systems and still wide awake, at four in the morning, stripping off their clothes for a hot shower. And everything had lulled. Finn thought about Logan’s head on his chest, Leo’s, from behind him, on his shoulder. The hot water pounding around them.

Finn blinked away from the memory and back to the warm light of their bathroom, where he was sitting on the counter now, Gryffindor turned to summer outside and Leo between his legs.

“Hold still,” Leo said.

“I’m trying,” Finn said. He tapped his heels against the back of Leo’s knees. “Logan’s making me laugh, yell at him.”

Logan held up his hands, one holding his phone. “What? I’m just standing here.”

Leo ducked closer, his fingers gentle on Finn’s jaw as he carefully scraped the last of Finn’s stubble away. Finn hummed when Leo wiped the last of the shaving cream with a warm towel.

“There,” Leo ran a hand over Finn’s jaw. “Done.”

“Perfect, should I do you now?” Finn grinned, moving his hands to Leo’s ass. “Oh, wait—”

Leo flicked Finn’s freshly shaven cheek.

“—Baby face.”

“Lo, you’re up,” Leo mocked glared and Finn laughed, pulling him in closer.

“I like baby face,” Finn said, and made a show of biting at the skin of Leo’s jaw with a growl.

“Don’t turn him on,” Logan said, shoving at Finn. “I want this thing off of my face.”

“I’m a little turned on,” Leo said.

Finn kissed Leo’s neck twice before sliding off of the counter, letting Logan take his place.

“That was so hot,” Finn said.

“What?” Leo said, spreading cream onto Logan’s cheeks.

“I don’t know, everything.” The equipment closet, the bathroom at Dumo’s, getting home to their bed. “I was just thinking about the Cup night. It was pretty fucking perfect.”

“Just think about when we have the Cup,” Logan said.

Leo shook his head as he tilted Logan’s chin up with his fingers. “I don’t even want to think about what the thing has been through, it is not going in our bed.”

“We can clean it before,” Finn said and Leo just scoffed.

“When does your plane leave tomorrow?” Logan asked, messing with a piece of Leo’s hair.

“Pretty early,” Leo started on Logan’s other cheek. “I’ll leave for the airport at seven. What about you guys?”

“I go to New York on Thursday, my Cup day is on Friday,” Finn said, looking up as he remembered. “And then I’ll meet Lo at Harvard.” He grinned. “And then we’ll meet you in good o’l New Aw-leens after that for your Cup day, and then to Canadia for Tremzy.”

Logan snorted. “Canadia?”

“I always want to say that because of Canadian. America gives you Americans, but Canada doesn’t give you Canadans.”

“You’re so weird.”

“Shaving cream always looks like it would taste good,” Finn continued, as if he didn’t hear Logan. He reached out and swiped a finger along Logan’s jaw, gathering some of the white foam. “But it really doesn’t.”

“I could try doing it with whipped cream,” Leo said.

Logan just looked between them, bewildered. “Just get this thing off.”

Seeing Leo’s bags by the door did something to Finn’s chest. He knew exactly where he was going, and knew he was coming back, but it caused a thin string of worry to begin to unspool itself in his chest. Hockey wasn’t the securest job in the world, and he knew they were all highly valued by the Lions—they had just won a Cup—but still. Finn worried. He would always worry, especially now. He was in love now. He was locked in.

Leo looked up from counting through his wallet, ID, and printed out ticket.

“Alright,” he smiled. “See you there?”

“Call us when you land,” Logan said. “You have to call us when you land or else I’m gonna, like…”

“He’ll freak out,” Finn said.

Logan smushed Leo’s cheeks with his hands. “I’ll freak out.”

“I’ll text you before the wheels even hit the ground,” Leo said, leaning down for a kiss. “How’s that, Lo?”

Logan leaned into Leo’s body, into the kiss, and Finn loved that. “Okay.”

When the door shut behind him, Logan sighed. “I’m going to be all alone in this apartment until my flight.”

Finn smiled, wrapping his arms around Logan from behind. “That’ll be, like, four hours.”

“Still.”

Finn’s hands traveled down to below Logan’s sweatpants band. He was still warm from being in bed, from taking Leo’s cock that morning. “At least you have something to think about until we’re together again. And then we’ll give Nut something to think about until we get to Louisiana.”

It made Logan smile. “Yeah…”

“Come help me pack,” Finn said and kissed Logan’s neck.

“You suck at packing.”

“I know, that’s why I need help.”

Finn laughed when Logan groaned, but followed him into the bedroom.

They were bringing the Cup back to Harvard. Finn had spent the majority of his day with the Cup in New York City. His parents were there, and Alex, and there was a parade. He’d wanted his boys with him, though. And now Logan was here, waiting for him in the summer night heat in front of an already rowdy OKN that was anticipating the Cup’s arrival.

The last time Finn had stood in this driveway, Logan had said goodbye. Finn had pulled over the second he had gotten off of campus because he couldn’t see. Standing there, in front of their old house and holding the Cup, the flashbacks of sitting and crying with his forehead against the steering wheel, feeling like his lungs were trying to burn up, wasn’t exactly welcome.

“Mon coeur,” Logan whispered as he approached Finn. He clapped a hand on Finn’s shoulder, a perfectly friendly gesture to any onlookers who couldn’t feel the way his fingers slipped beneath the neck of Finn’s t-shirt. “I know.”

Finn looked at him, flexing his fingers against the Cup’s rim. “I love you, Lo.”

Logan was wearing one of his old Harvard hats, flipped backwards. He had a gray t-shirt on and black shorts that cut just above his knee. His Nikes were ones that he’d had since Freshman year. He looked just like he had then. He looked just as he had when Finn couldn’t have him.

“I love you,” Logan said now.

Most of their old teammates were there, having traveled back just for this, and were already well on their way to drunk. Finn forced himself to push the feelings aside—he was used to doing that in this house. He raised the Cup above his head and shouted along with the rest of them, with Logan. Finn could hear his own heart more than he could hear the shouts of welcome and elation. He could feel the sweat beading down his back and temples more than he could register himself setting the Cup down on a high table, among beer cans. Most of the guys here wouldn’t dare touch it out of bad luck, but they started up a round of We Are The Champions anyway. Finn felt too hot and too cold all at once, looking around at the familiar house. Logan was shaking people’s hands, people were shaking Finn’s hand, and clapping him on the back. He walked around and he was smiling, and laughing. He was handed a drink, and then another, and he was cracking jokes to make others laugh. And something felt like it was blocking part of his throat. What air he could draw was clammy. He had lost Logan about an hour in. The Cup was gleaming on its card table pedestal. It looked too bright. Everything looked a little too bright. He put his drink down.

“Where are the drinks at?” he asked a sandy-haired guy. He needed water.

“Kitchen, man,” the guy grinned. “Knock yourself out, you deserve it.”

Finn looked for Logan, but still didn’t see him.

“Thanks,” he said instead.

The kitchen was only more shouts and bodies, more back slaps. It felt even hotter with the sun completely gone outside, like there was nothing except this house, nothing except this feeling. Most people were too drunk to really talk to him, though. There were girls, too. Girls kissing his cheeks, their hands on the back of his neck—

And there was Logan. He had a bottle of rum in one hand, in the middle of pouring it over some coke and ice, and there was a girl pressed along his side. She had her hand on his chest, twisting his fleur-de-lis pendant in her fingers. Finn could see plainly that Logan was carefully trying to extract his body from hers. He had that slight smile on his face that he got when he was uncomfortable. He set the bottle down when he finished pouring his drink and stepped away, willing to talk, but that was all. There would be pictures, probably.

Finn remembered seeing Logan kissing a girl. He remembered a mouth against his own neck while he watched, and then Logan’s mouth against his, for the first time. He remembered Logan leaving, and he remembered going to sit in the car, waiting for him to come out—and sitting in the pulled over car, leaving Logan for Gryffindor, his stomach churning, memories blurring, he wanted him and he couldn’t have him and Logan said no—

Finn stumbled back a step just as Logan looked up. Harz. Finn watched Logan’s mouth say the word, but he couldn’t hear him. Finn turned, walking until he found a dark hallway, somewhere near the back of the house with the trash bins and dusty cleaning supplies. His fingers were shaking as he took out his phone. It only rang twice.

“Leo?”

“Hi, Harz,” Leo said. “Sheesh, big party, huh? I didn’t know college parties actually sounded like that.”

“I—” Finn wiped sweat from his forehead, pushing his hair back. He sort of wondered if he was going to pass out.

“Finn?” Leo said, more carefully this time.

“Leo—”

“Hey, sweetheart, hey, what’s wrong?”

Finn blew a breath out, glancing around the corner to make sure he was still as alone as he could get before ducking his head to his chest. “I don’t know. I don’t know what’s wrong, I should be having fun. I tried to have fun.”

“Okay,” Leo said. The music was making his voice hard to hear. “That’s okay, is Lo with you?”

“Yeah,” Finn rasped. “I mean, no—I mean, he’s here somewhere.”

“Can you find Lo and then somewhere quiet for a second?”

“What the fuck is wrong? I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong, Harz, I think—I think it’s just tough on you being back at that house. I was thinking it might be, actually.”

“The house,” Finn repeated.

“Yeah,” Leo said. “Finn, I really want you to find Logan, okay? Logan can help you better than I can right now. Especially now. Okay, sweetheart?”

“Sorry, Knutty, you’re—” Finn dug his fingers into his eyes. “You’re with your family—”

“No, no, no,” Leo said. “I love you. Love you so much. Call me always, okay?”

“Okay,” Finn said. “I’m—”

“Harzy?”

Finn looked up. Logan was standing there, green eyes bright from the street lamps outside.

“Finn, ça va?”

“Lo’s here now,” Finn said into the phone. “Bye, Nut. Love you. Call you later.”

“Love you,” Leo said, and then hung up.

“It was Nut,” Finn said. He swallowed over his dry throat and shoved his phone back into his shorts. He pointed to Logan’s drink. “Can I have some of that?”

Logan glanced behind them, but the hallway was empty. He walked forward and handed Finn the plastic cup, hand between his shoulder blades.

“Harz…” Logan’s voice shifted into concern. “You’re burning up, what’s—”

Finn took a long swallow. It was all too sweet. “I’m just—it’s hot. I’m really thirsty.”

“Let me get you water,” Logan said. “Stay here, don’t move.”

Finn barely had time to set the cup down before Logan was back, cracking open a bottle of water for him. It was slick with condensation, and Logan held it to his lips when it nearly slipped out of Finn’s hand.

“Your heart’s pounding,” Logan said, hand still between Finn’s shoulder blades.

“I don’t know,” Finn said, and finished half of the bottle in one go. Logan’s thumb caught a drop from the corner of his mouth.

“What can I do?”

Finn let his head thunk back against the wall. “I don’t know.”

“Okay,” Logan said. “Okay…”

“I’m…” Finn began. He was sorry, he knew he was freaking Logan out. He could see it on his face.

Logan shook his head a little, but was quiet. He moved his palm from Finn’s back to Finn’s neck. It was cool from the water bottle and Finn rolled into it. He looked at Logan, and then reached forward and took the Harvard hat from his head. It made his hair fall forward, dusting gently near his eyes. It eased Finn’s heart.

“I need to breathe,” Finn said, and Logan seemed to know what he meant.

They were suppose to go to the roof. Finn needed air, he needed to not be in this stuffy house anymore, as seeped in hard memories as the carpet probably was in alcohol. But they both paused at the top of the stairs. The door to Logan’s old room was ajar, the one he’d had as a Junior. The year Finn had left.

“I asked about it,” Logan said hoarsely into the silence. “What’s-his-face said the guy living here’s abroad this semester.”

Finn could only nod.

The music from downstairs seemed far away as they walk inside. The bed was in the same place. The dresser, everything. There was the same metal trash bin. The whiteboard above the desk had never even been erased. It still had some guy’s schedule across it. Finn remembered the flight scheduled for Thanksgiving that he always chirped Logan for never erasing.

Finn turned away and only barely quieted the first breath of tears. They surprised him as much as a trip and a fall would.

“Finn,” Logan’s voice came out pained. “Finn…”

“Sorry,” his breaths were hitching too fast for his words. “It’s just a lot—like, looking,” he gestured vaguely to the bed where he’d held Logan for what had been the last time for a long time. A long time. “Looking at it all. Fuck, sorry.” Finn pressed his hand over his eyes, his other arm going around his stomach.

Logan was there in a moment, though, pulling his hands away from him, like tearing a wall down, and he held Finn tightly, pressed up on his toes to wrap his arms around him. Finn clutched him, crying into his neck.

“Lo.”

“I’m sorry,” Logan was crying, too. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

“You don’t have to,” Finn began, but he really couldn’t speak. He could feel himself shaking only because Logan was so steady in that moment.

“Yes,” Logan said. “Yes, I do.” Logan pulled back, hands slipping to Finn’s neck and jaw. “I knew you were hurting. And you were hurting more than I was because you were okay with what you wanted. I wasn’t. I—on the phone, after you got to Gryffindor, you were crying.”

Finn shook his head, not to say no, or stop, but just against the onslaught of memories. They ached.

Logan wiped his eyes on his sleeve and then his hands were gentle on Finn again, wiping his wet cheeks. “I knew you were, and I didn’t say anything. I didn’t do anything.”

“It’s—”

“It’s not okay,” Logan said fiercely, then pressed forward and kissed Finn quickly. “It’s not okay. You never stopped being my best friend. Not for a second, and I should have been there, even if it was only as that. We should have talked. Like you wanted to. And I’m—” Logan’s voice broke. “Finn…”

Finn’s contact photo was one that Logan had taken of him secretly. In it, Finn was reading, slouched in a library chair across the table from him, his glasses on and his hair messy from a long bus ride, coming home from an away game. Logan had acted like he was on his phone, and snapped the picture, blushing despite himself.

Logan loved that picture.

Now, he could barely look at it.

It popped up, along with Finn’s name.

Call me when you get there. Logan wished he’d never said that. He took his headphones off and pushed his laptop screen down. And stared at his phone. It rang again, and again, and then Logan jolted and picked it up.

He opened his mouth to say something and froze again, breathing through his heartbeats. Maybe it wasn’t Finn, maybe he just wished it was and some robot spam voice was going to—

“Lo?”

Finn.

“Hello?” Logan managed, which was stupid, as if he didn’t know who it was. That was not how he answered Finn’s phone calls, ever.

“Hey, Lo,” Finn’s voice sounded soft, and so tired. “I’m at the hotel. In Gryffindor.”

“You made it.”

There was another handful of painful seconds, then, “Yeah.”

“Yeah,” Logan breathed. “Yeah, good. Good.”

“Meeting some of the guys tomorrow.”

Logan nodded, eyes staring. “They’ll—love you.” The words choked him.

Finn didn’t respond for a long time, but Logan knew he was still there by his breathing. It was…it was like—

“Yeah,” Finn said, finally, and his voice was raspy, barely there. There was a sharp sound of breath.

Finn was crying.

“Yeah, it’s good,” Finn said again, and it was muffled, like he had a hand over his mouth.

Logan had a sudden, horrible image of Finn sitting in a hotel room, all alone, hunched over at the end of a cold bed, cheeks flushed beneath his freckles from tears, hand locked over his mouth so Logan wouldn’t hear.

Logan threw his hat off and pushed his hair off his forehead. He felt too warm. He needed to respond. They were just sitting there, on two ends of an invisible line.

“Tremz—” Finn started, and then there was another rush of breath through the speaker, like Finn couldn’t finish the sentence.

And Logan was still stuck, listening. He couldn’t listen to Finn cry. He couldn’t do it.

“Tell me what Black is like,” Logan said. “Call me later, if you want—” Logan clamped his mouth shut, briefly closing his eyes. “I—I’m really proud of you. You know that, though.”

Finn was really, really quiet then, like he’d pull the phone away entirely. Logan put a palm over his eyes. His head hurt. His chest hurt.

“Yeah,” Finn said. “Okay.”

“Bye, Harzy.”

There was an exhale that maybe had a goodbye in it somewhere, and then the line went dead.

Logan lowered his phone from his ear and stared at the screen. The call had lasted all of five minutes.

He clicked it off, closed his computer, and curled into his bed. He fell asleep, finally, with the lights still on.

Logan was stroking his hand through the back of Finn’s hair gently. Finn’s breathing had calmed, but he didn’t hold Logan any less tight, bent to tuck his face against Logan’s neck.

“I love you,” Logan whispered. “I loved you then and I love you now.”

Finn whispered it back.

“I’m sorry I pretended. I was scared.”

“I know. I was scared, too,” Finn replied.

He straightened, then, and looked at Logan. His head hurt a little, but he felt clearer. Logan looked ready to pull him back in again, and Finn would have let him—if they were really alone.

“Come to me tonight, okay?” Finn said. His nose was a little stuffed up from crying. “At the hotel. After we’re alone, and we’ll call Peanut, and just—sleep next to me.”

Logan nodded. As if he could do anything else.

“What do you want to do now?” Logan asked.

Finn sniffed, wiped his red eyes, but smiled. “Let’s go downstairs. We have the Cup, and…despite it all, this is where I found one of the loves of my life.”

Logan smiled and let Finn kiss him slowly.

“Let’s go enjoy this.”

“Finn,” Logan said before they left the room. “Tell me if you want to talk about it. Ever. Tonight. I will, I’ll talk about it with you. I don’t want you to feel what you just felt downstairs.”

Finn turned back around and took Logan’s face in his hands, kissing him soundly. “I don’t think that was about you. I think that was about me. You hurt me, and I hurt you,” Finn softened the words with another kiss. “But now we’re what helps each other. Yeah? Some people aren’t that lucky.”

Logan nodded. “Yeah.”

Logan knocked on Finn’s door about ten minutes after they had arrived at the hotel. It opened to reveal Finn wearing a gray Gryffindor t-shirt and sweatpants. Logan stood in the doorframe for a minute, socked-toes digging into the hotel carpet.

Finn stepped aside, closed the door once Logan had stepped in, and Logan tucked his fingers up and under Finn’s shirt, resting his cheek against his chest.

“Oh,” Finn laughed a little. “Hi.”

“They have video games on this TV.”

Finn scratched Logan’s scalp lightly, his other hand resting on his hip. “I’d own you, but you’re tired.”

“Non.”

Finn chuckled. “I can hear it in your voice.”

“You smell good.”

“Me?”

Logan nodded. “Like you.”

Finn rested his cheek in Logan’s hair. “I hope that’s a good thing.”

“It is,” Logan said. “Let’s call Nut.”

When Leo answered the phone, he was somewhere noisy, but he smiled when he saw the two of them sprawled out.

“Hey, baby,” Finn said. “Partying it up?”

Leo looked between the two of them knowingly and smiled. “I’m glad you two talked.”

Finn laughed. “How’d you know?”

“Logan’s got that look. It’s basically his I-just-scored-a-goal look, but it goes for this, too.”

Logan rested his head on Finn’s shoulder. “How are you?”

Leo looked around. “Good. Just at a family get-together. Eating, celebrating,” he tilted his head in the way Logan loved. “Missing my lover boys. Especially now that I’ve seen you. How are you?”

“Our party was…intense,” Finn wrapped an arm around Logan and kissed his temple. “We’re glad to be chilling, I think.”

Logan nodded, palm over Finn’s heart. “We miss you.”

“We really miss you.”

Leo pushed a hand through his hair. “Well, text me, okay? After you’ve,” Leo snorted. “consummated the hard talk.”

Logan laughed loudly, jostling Finn. He couldn’t deny that Leo was right. Logan needed that closeness right now. And by the way Finn held him closer at the words, he thought Finn did, too.

“Not during,” Leo said. “As much as I want it, I’m surrounded by cousins and shit right now.”

“If you’re sure,” Finn grinned.

Leo opened his mouth to respond, when the camera was yanked away from them to reveal a smiling Eloise Knut.

“Hi, boys! Oh, aren’t you two cozy.”

“Hi, Eloise,” Logan smiled. “Ça va?”

“Honeys, we’re so excited to have you coming to stay with us. Leo’s glaring at me for the phone.”

Finn laughed. “We’re excited, too.”

The screen was pulled back to Leo. He was closer now, and half-whispering a rush of words. “Okay, I love you, text me, feel free to send me pictures later, I’ll be all alone in my room.”

Finn touched his fingers to the phone camera, as if to touch Leo. “Love you, Butter.”

“Can’t wait to see you,” Logan leaned in close to the camera. “You look tan already. Fuck.”

Leo grinned, dropped a devastating wink, and hung up.

Finn set his phone down on the bedside table and looked at Logan. They were both quiet for a minute. The overhead light buzzed a little, but other than that, it was just them.

“Should we be cheesy and order champagne?” Finn asked softly, smile teasing.

Logan shook his head. “I don’t want to see anyone but you all night.”

Finn sighed, a sated huff of breath. “Lo.”

Logan reached up to brush his fingers along Finn’s jaw. “Viens ici.”

Finn didn’t seem to need a translation. He came, leaning forward slowly to brush their lips together. He stopped with a gentle laugh.

“Quoi?” Logan said, tilting his chin forward to press his mouth against Finn’s cheek.

“Why does it feel like I’m kissing you for the first time?” Finn murmured.

Logan looked at him, pulling back only enough to do it. Finn’s eyes were still closed, dark eyelashes ending it a lighter, reddish blond color. He opened them then, looking back at Logan. Logan pushed Finn’s hair away from his eyes, a little long with the flurry of the playoffs, and smiled.

“It sort of does, yeah. Better than our actual first kiss.”

“No, I love our first kiss,” Finn eased Logan back into the pillows and crawled over him. “Knocked my fucking socks off.”

“I saw you with that girl,” Logan said, pushing his hands under Finn’s t-shirt. “I don’t know, I just…I couldn’t let you go. We had just pulled that all nighter, remember?”

“I thought about that today,” Finn said. “When I was…freaking out, I don’t know. And of course I remember,” Finn bent to press a kiss to Logan’s neck. Logan’s eyes slipped closed at the feeling.

“We made coffee at, like, three in the morning,” Logan whispered, holding Finn closer. His skin was warm, his mouth familiar. “We were in the kitchen.”

“I said you put too much sugar in your coffee,” Finn moved to the other side of Logan’s neck, kisses wet and loving.

Logan smiled at the memory, brows drawn together as he felt Finn’s teeth against his skin. “And I said,” Logan pushed Finn’s shirt up further, his other hand going to his thick red hair.

Finn laughed into his skin. “You said, I’m sweet, Harzy.” Finn drew back, then, eyes bright. “And I said, yeah, you are.”

“And you were standing right here,” Logan said, and tightened his thighs around Finn’s hips.

Finn dropped back to a whisper again. “And I swear to God, I almost kissed you.”

“I wanted you to.”

“I wanted you to want me to.”

“And then I went and left you in that room at the party.”

“You don’t get to fault yourself for those things,” Finn said. “Okay, baby, listen to me.”

Logan let Finn pull him into a sitting position, let him pull him into his lap. Finn lifted Logan’s shirt off, throwing it somewhere in the room, and then picked up his fleur-de-lis pendant and kissed it, then kissed where it rested on Logan’s chest.

“Fucking girls touching this thing all night,” Finn grumbled, and Logan watched him kiss it a few more times with a smile before looking up.

“I love you. I love you and it’s okay now. It’ll take time, but it is okay,” Finn smiled when Logan kissed the words in his mouth. “I love you so fucking much, it’s insane.”

Logan kissed Finn’s lower lip gently and let it bounce back into place. “I’m never going to leave you like that.”

“I forgive you,” Finn whispered. “Can you forgive me?”

Logan paused. “What do I have to forgive you for?”

Finn raised an eyebrow. “Takes two to tango.”

Logan shifted. “Finn…”

“We went through it. Let me love you instead of us punishing ourselves for being, you know. Scared.”

Logan tangled his fingers in the hair at the back of Finn’s neck. “You’re so smart,” Logan said. He watched as Finn played with the necklace again, letting it rest against his palm. “I wish people who think they know you knew that.”

Finn let the pendant go and finally kissed him. Logan felt the silver fall against his chest. He tightened his grip around Finn’s neck as Finn eased him back into the pillows, mouth all heat and insistence.

“This could be our first kiss that we’ve forgiven ourselves for,” Finn said.

Logan kissed Finn again. “Yes.”

“You get quiet when you know I’m right.”

“You get loud.”

Finn laughed into their next kiss, and Logan did, too, and Logan liked that the best.

“Love you,” Finn said softly. His eyes were happy, and if Logan was still worried about him from earlier, it was gone with that look. He could feel Finn’s cock through their sweatpants, could feel his heart when he pressed his lips to his neck.

Logan stroked his hands down Finn’s broad back. He grabbed the hem of Finn’s shirt and pushed it up until Finn himself had to sit up, tugging it over his head. He was pale, and a little burnt at his neck and biceps from parading the Cup around New York in the summer. Logan had to sit up and kiss the pink skin.

“I got burnt,” Finn said.

“No kidding,” Logan huffed out a laugh, but he kept his kisses tender. “Is this what love is? I find it cute that you got sunburned?”

“Yep,” Finn smiled. “It’s also wanting to get fucked by your sunburned lover.”

“Well, yeah,” Logan tilted his head up, arms around Finn’s hips. “I thought that was obvious.”

Finn laughed and rocked back onto the bed so he could get his pants off, but Logan beat him to it, lunging forward and bracketing him in with his arms.

“Oh, hi,” Finn said. “You wanna do it for me?”

“Yes,” Logan said, and bent to press his lips to Finn’s chest. He kissed down the center, then over to one hip, and then the other. He rubbed Finn through his sweatpants, heart quickening at the glimpses of the trail of red hair he got, leading down to his hard cock. He rubbed the heel of his palm along Finn, the material of his sweatpants dragging taut. Finn let out a breath, head falling back on the mattress for a moment before he reached to tangle a hand in Logan’s hair.

“I used to think about you all the time when I got off,” Logan said, and pulled Finn’s sweatpants down just enough to mouth right above his cock. “Even when you were just across the room in your bed.”

Finn smiled, then pulled a lip between his teeth. “I’m pretty sure we heard each other more than a few times.”

Logan remembered it well. The soft shifting of sheets in the dark, Finn’s short pants of breath, and himself plumping up in response. Hearing Finn like that had been as much frustrating as it had been a relief. Logan remembered pressing his cheek into his pillow, trying to keep himself silent when he could tell the exact moment Finn was about to come, and the moment when he did. It was like being able to tell when Finn was going to pass to him, or score. There was the sharp intake of breath, his hand froze, and then he would make a single, soft noise, and pick up his pace again. One night, when the moon had been bright and Logan had been facing the right direction, he’d been able to watch Finn’s chest heave with it, pale in the milky light.

He didn’t have to be quiet now, and he could look all he wanted.

Logan pulled Finn’s sweatpants down and wrapped a hand around his cock. He looked up at him as he wrapped his lips around the head and then closed his eyes. A moment later, he felt Finn suck in a breath, felt his thumb brush over the delicate skin under his eye.

“You’re gorgeous, you know?” Finn said softly. “Oh—”

Logan sunk down further, hollowing his cheeks and relishing on the heat that spilled on his tongue. He got his knees under him more, cock throbbing with each brush of his own thigh, so he could raise to suck just the head into his mouth, then lower, just for a moment, until his lips brushed Finn’s balls. He pulled back and off for air and smiled a little, cheeks flushed. Finn had his head tilted back, his mouth open, panting with the brush of Logan’s throat.

“You’re so good,” Logan said, and sucked Finn down again. Finn moaned, hips pushing into Logan’s mouth. Logan sputtered a little but hooked his arms under Finn’s hips when he went to pull back and kept him there, bobbing his head faster.

“Logan,” Finn’s voice was tight, his name ending with a loud punch of breath. “Lo, baby, oh god.”

Logan pulled off with a gasp and leaned down to lick at Finn’s balls, taking one into his mouth, then the other. His cock was making a mess inside his own sweatpants as he took Finn down again. He was a warm, solid weight on his tongue, and Logan wanted him inside. Logan sucked hard once more, then looked up at Finn.

“Fuck me,” Logan said. “Harzy.”

Finn’s arms looked a little shaky as he pushed himself up into a sitting position and when Logan laughed, Finn slapped his chest before pushing him onto his back.

“I love you,” Finn said, and hovered above him. He was on his forearms so that his hands could stroke through Logan’s hair, and his kisses were open-mouthed and sloppy. “Oh, I love you.”

Finn was dripping on Logan’s thighs, darkening the material of is sweatpants.

Logan reached blindly in the direction of the bedside table. “Lube.”

“Let me get it, I’ll get it,” Finn was breathless, pink from his cheeks to his neck.

Logan let Finn roll away, and brought his ankles up to kick off his sweatpants. On the way back down, Finn was back and he caught Logan’s ankles, grinning as he pulled them to rest on his shoulders.

“This is new,” he said.

Logan laughed. “Kinda hot, too.”

Finn tilted his head to kiss along one of Logan’s calves. He bit lightly at the muscle on the inside of his knee.

“Didn’t know I had a thing for jocks, but…” Finn ran his palm over the swell of Logan’s ass appreciatively. “Between Leo and you…okay, then.”

“Hm,” Logan hummed, pressing his calves down on Finn’s shoulders to lift his ass up towards him. His cock was a dark, neglected red against his stomach. “You look so good, c’mon.”

“Keep telling me I’m good and I might just come.”

“Non, don’t.”

Finn pushed his hips forward so that the wet tip of his dick dragged messily against Logan’s entrance. “Non?”

Logan’s eyes slipped closed and his grin felt a little drunk. “Harz.”

Finn smiled, kissed the inside of Logan’s ankle, then wrapped his arms around Logan’s legs to keep them there while he clicked open the lube. “Okay, here we go.”

Logan settled back into the pillows. “I used to pretend it was you when I did this to myself.”

Finn’s fingers worked slowly and Logan bit his lip.

“When?” Finn’s voice came softly.

“Shower,” Logan said. “Sometimes—sometimes at night. With you right there. My stupider decisions.”

“I knew it,” Finn said, and twisted his fingers just so, making them both smile when Logan let out a low moan.

“Accidentally said your name once.”

Finn’s gaze snapped to his, his fingers stilling. Logan could remember it almost perfectly. The blood-chilling dread that had followed after he’d let the word slip into their small room. Finn.

“Did you,” Logan curled his fingers over Finn’s thighs, voice dropping. “Did you hear me?”

Finn’s nod was slow, and his voice even softer. “Yeah.”

And then Finn was leaning forward, Logan’s legs falling against his sides so that they could press together.

“Say my name now,” Finn whispered.

Logan’s breath hitched as he felt the head of Finn’s cock at his entrance. “Finn.”

“Say it again,” Finn’s mouth dragged up his neck, and Logan still didn’t know what it was about that. It made him crazy.

Logan clutched at him. “Finn.”

Finn pressed inside him slowly, and Logan didn’t need him to ask again.

“Finn,” Logan’s voice rose, and then broke over his name as Finn drew back and then into him again, and again.

“This is what I pictured when I heard you,” Finn murmured, shoving their hips together in slow, long rocks. “God, Logan.”

Logan wound his legs and arms around him. His palms slipped on Finn’s slick back. Finn smelled like sweat and himself. Logan had fallen asleep to that scent on bus rides when he couldn’t touch him, he scored goals to that scent when Finn, soaked with sweat and adrenaline, would crash him into the boards. Logan heard himself make some sort of broken sound, because Finn was going to be all over him after this, inside of him.

“I love you, Lo,” Finn said, arms around Logan’s back and shoulders, his knees against his hips. Finn fucked like he never needed to stop, like they were wound together so tightly they’d never separate.

“I love—” Logan’s back arched up against Finn on its own when Finn jammed his prostate. “Ah—”

His cock ached with every brush of Finn’s chest against his own, until Finn finally reached between them and wrapped a hand around him. Logan’s breathing hitched and his eyes felt suddenly wet.

“I love you.”

Finn forgave him. Finn forgave him.

Logan held on tighter, finding Finn’s mouth with his own, and said it again. “I love you.”

Logan came between them suddenly. Finn licked into his slack mouth, but Logan pressed him closer when he stilled, moving to pull out.

“Non, stay,” Logan panted, voice pitching up at the end of his word, then giving out as his orgasm shook through him. “Stay.”

Finn stayed, smiling. “You’re never one-and-done, are you?”

Logan’s smile felt delirious. “Good thing I have two of you—fuck, do that again.”

Logan’s fingers tangling into Finn’s sweaty hair, and they kissed as Finn rocked into Logan gently.

“Think about when we’re all together again,” Finn whispered.

“Stay,” Logan said.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Stay.”

“Shh, baby,” Finn whispered, kissing the corner of his mouth. His movements were gentle, and small enough so they were never apart. “I’m here.”

Logan’s cock dripped steadily between them as Finn brushed his prostate over and over, and Logan felt wound tight and boneless, all at once.

“Oh, Lo,” Finn groaned, and flexed his hips into Logan harder.

Logan kissed Finn’s neck, teeth scraping into his skin. Logan felt surrounded by him.

“I’m coming,” he found himself saying, because it felt like he still was. Finn’s cock was rubbing up consistently against his walls, and his own cock was red in the tacky pool of come on his stomach. Logan could hear himself panting for breath. His muscles still felt tight, his toes curled against Finn’s calves. He groaned, head falling back against the pillows instead, pushing himself up against Finn’s cock, heavy inside of him.

“Logan,” Finn’s voice was shaky. “Lo, I’m gonna—” he said, and then wet heat filled Logan up. Finn fucked in one more time and stayed there, forehead pressed to Logan’s.

The heat that tore through him made him dig his nails into Finn’s back. Finn was making soft noises as his cock pulsed, and Logan could feel some drip down between his thighs.

Finn was stroking his hair back from his forehead, sweaty and hot, and kissing his jaw. Logan tucked himself against Finn. He was too big, too broad, really, but Finn covered him up with his body, kissing him and all but melting them together. Finn pressed in one last time with a low sound, and then fell against Logan’s chest. They breathed hard against each other in the aftershock, kissing slowly, languidly.

Finn pulled out when he was too sensitive, and Logan rolled them over, thigh thrown over Finn’s hips to kiss him some more. He kissed Finn’s cheeks, and his neck, and every part of skin he could reach without having to pull away. He left marks, smudges that said he had been there—even if no one else would know. He would know. He would be proud, and he would be happy.

Finn, unusually, melted back against the sheets and let Logan do as he wanted. He lay back when Logan told him to. When Logan went to the bathroom and cleaned them up. When Logan came back, pulling the covers over them and laying on his back, it was Finn’s head against his chest and Logan’s hand stroking through his hair.

“Today,” Finn began, and then hesitated. “Today freaked me out.”

“I know, I could tell,” Logan said. “You’re allowed to be freaked out. You’ve watched me and Leo both freak out and been there for us. Let us be there for you. What can I do?”

Finn’s fingers were fidgeting with Logan’s necklace. “I think I’ll be okay. I just didn’t know that would happen.” Finn raised his chin to look up at him. “We’ve come a long way from hard nights,” he smiled. “Not to say there won’t be more but…”

Logan cupped his cheek. “We can talk to each other. We can say that we love each other.”

Finn smiled, just a little. “Says the boy who hates talking.”

Logan smiled, too, leaning in to brush their lips together. “Yeah, but I love hearing you talk. And read. And moan my name—”

Finn tilted his chin up to kiss some more before pulling Logan more firmly against him.

“We get to see Nutter tomorrow.”

Logan hummed. “Think he just walks around naked because it’s so hot?”

Finn snorted. “Probably not. It’s a nice thought though.”

“Thinks he has a million bookshelves?” Logan smiled at the thought, of Leo curled up in his childhood room, of Leo showing them everything he had ever loved before he loved them.

“Oh, definitely.”

“Yeah. What did he say when you called him?”

“Told me to find you,” Finn raised his head. “Listen, I didn’t call Leo because I didn’t think you could help. I just…I need him just as much as I need you.”

“You don’t have to explain,” Logan hushed him. “I’m the same. And also I’m…I don’t know how to say it other than, I was part of the problem.” He kissed Finn softly. “I know.”

“Okay,” Finn said, and pressed back against Logan, nose against his neck. “Don’t go anywhere, okay?”

Logan just held him tighter. “I won’t.”

They were both groggy from the plane. Logan had his headphones around his neck and his hat shoved into the elastic side pocket of his backpack.

“I can feel the humidity already,” Logan said. “Where’s Nut?”

Finn took out his phone. “He can’t exactly get through security. Arrivals, probably. I texted him that we landed. He didn’t—oh, he said he’s walking from parking now.”

Logan jumped once, keeping in pace with Finn. “I want him. How long do you think we’re going to be surrounded by family? Not that I don’t love them but fuck.”

“Stop it, you’re getting me going.”

Logan sent him a sleepy smile as they followed the signs to arrivals.

And there Leo was, standing in a t-shirt and shorts with a backwards hat on—not Lions colored, as if that would help him not get recognized if someone knew what they were looking for. His sunglasses were folded into his shirt and he was searching the crowd in his careful way.

“Oh, fuck me,” Logan heard Finn breathe.

Logan gave Finn a small shove. “C’mon, let’s see how close we can get before he sees us.”

Not very close. A second later, Leo was grinning at them. They walked forward quickly and stopped right in front of him. Logan’s heart was pounding.

“Hi,” Leo sounded breathless.

Their hugs weren’t what they would have been away from prying eyes, but Finn clutched Leo as hard as he could, whispering in his ear.

“We missed you so much. So fucking much.”

Logan watched them for a moment and then Leo was turning to him.

“Hi, Tremz.”

Logan wanted to kiss him, wanted to curl his fingers under his shirt to the small of his back where he was always warmest. Instead, he let Leo pull him in for a quick hug.

“Flight was okay?” Leo asked, and took their suitcases from them. When they looked at him, he laughed. “What?”

“Nothing,” Logan said softly, and he and Finn shared a look as they watched Leo lead the way outside. They loved him.

Logan froze after they stepped out of the airport. He held his hands up, as if testing for rain.

“Are—” he began, then looked up. “Are we under a heater?”

Leo laughed. “No. That’s NOLA for you.”

“Oh god,” Logan said faintly.

Finn, however, walked right into the sunshine and tilted his head up. “I will never be cold again.”

“You’ll get sunburned, though,” Logan grumbled.

“Aw, Harz,” Leo said, then more softly, “Love you. C’mon, boys, car’s this way.”

Leo lead the way towards the parking lot, and walked ahead a little when he got out his keys and his car lit up.

Logan felt his steps slow, and Finn’s beside him.

“Leo—Leo drives a Jeep,” Finn said softly to Logan.

“Leo drives a Jeep,” Logan repeated.

“I’m…”

“Yeah.”

The top was open to the air, windows down. Leo swung the suitcases into the trunk, and Logan watched his muscles move beneath his shirt.

“I want…” he grumbled and Finn laughed, squeezing the back of his neck.

The moment they were in the car, Leo in the driver’s seat with Finn beside him, Logan leaned forward from the back and wrapped his arms around Leo the best he could, burying his nose into the place where his curls fanned out around his ears. Logan hummed, pressing kiss after kiss there.

“Tremz, you’re killing me here,” Leo laughed, then turned his face, shaded by the car and some thick trees, and let Logan kiss him. The angle was awkward, and Logan knew he was using way too much tongue, but Leo melted back into his seat for it. Finn reached forward to put a hand on his neck.

“You are tan,” Finn said. “How do you do that?”

Logan had a sudden urge to see where the sun hadn’t reached.

“Okay, okay,” Leo laughed between kisses. “Let me get us out of here.”

Logan just dipped his head down a little farther and nipped at Leo’s neck, just over Finn’s fingers.

“Tremz,” Leo said, leaning into it.

“D’accord,” Logan said, and sat back. “That’ll be okay for now.”

“Well, don’t I get a snack before dinner, too?” Finn said, and then pulled Leo in and kissed him—albeit more gently than Logan had.

“Hi, Butter,” he smiled.

“My name is just slowly devolving into food products,” Leo smiled. “Hi.”

Leo unfolded his sunglasses and slid them on, pushing the button to start the car. “Ready?”

“So fucking ready,” Finn said, and put his sunglasses on, too.

Logan tilted his head back and closed his eyes, letting the overwhelming heat sink in. “Allez.”

Leo’s house was bright and large, all creams and whites. There were thick, white columns, and the entire front was framed by two turreted, oriel windows. There was a gate, and then oak trees, cypresses and small white flowers that cascaded over the porches and steps.

“Well Jesus,” Finn said, standing up a little in his seat. “Not what I was expecting.”

Leo glanced up at him as he pulled through the round about. “No?”

“I mean…” Finn laughed. “I don’t know.”

“C’est très beau,” Logan said, pushing himself up using the back of Leo’s seat. “Fuck me, it’s hot.”

Leo turned the car off. “Let’s get out of the sun. I’m sure my mom—”

“There they are!”

They looked up to one of the great, wooden doors opening. Eloise and Wyatt stepped out, Wyatt more calmly than his wife. Eloise was waving to them with both arms.

“Yep,” Leo laughed. “C’mon.”

“Oh, Finn,” Eloise said when they climbed the porch steps and into the shade of the overhang. “You won’t last a second in this sun, honey, let’s get you inside.”

Finn smiled. “Yeah, sunscreen is big in my family.”

“Logan,” Eloise smiled and hugged him, too. “I’ve got some iced tea and lunch all ready.”

Logan stared up at the entrance hall, all high ceilings and clean tiles and dark wood. There were shawls hanging on hooks by the door, mingled with leaning hockey sticks. Logan recognized Leo’s favorite Nikes. He was suddenly very aware that Leo lived here. It was sort of like getting used to coming home to him everyday. But this was Leo’s, and it had been Leo’s for years and years. Logan wanted to walk through every room and look for little signs of him.

“We have the dining room, sure,” Wyatt smiled, gesturing to it. “But, I don’t know, we always liked the kitchen better it being just the three of us and all. Come on through, boys.”

“We’ll eat, and then you can take showers or a nap or whatever you want,” Eloise said.

Oh, yeah, Logan thought. Whatever we want.

“This looks amazing,” Logan said as they walked into the kitchen.

The table was half surrounded by chairs, and half by a curved window seat in one of the oriel windows. The table itself was laden with pressed, pork paninis, along with what looked like creamy side dishes, and vegetable salads.

“Thank you, Tremzy,” Eloise’s smile was wide. “You all sit down, me and Wyatt’ll get the silverware and the pie.”

It was cool inside and Logan let out a breath when he scooted into the window seat after Finn had, and then Leo. He watched them smiling at each other as Leo put two sandwiches on Finn’s plate and poured him some tea. It made Logan smile, too. He was about to reach for the sandwiches when Leo turned to him.

“You want two, too?” Leo said softly. His accent sounded stronger, maybe from being around family.

Logan nodded, feeling helpless and in love. “Yeah, sure.”

“You want tea?”

“Ouais.”

“You two okay? You’re all quiet.”

Logan looked at Finn, who laughed.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been better in my life,” Finn said.

“Well—good,” Leo said.

Logan glanced at where Leo’s parents were coming back over.

“We’ll tell you later.”

The food was delicious, but what Finn really loved was how, when they were done, Leo helped bring all of the plates over and then began silently sort of trying to wave them out of their seats and towards the main staircase.

“Alright, well, see you boys, then,” Wyatt laughed. “Leo, I don’t want you to have the boat out too late, so keep that in mind.”

Eloise smiled. “Oh, they have time. It’s a big house, don’t worry about anything.”

“Mama,” Leo said. “And dad, you just ruined the surprise!”

Wyatt whistled. “Oh, damn, sorry…”

“We’ll be over at the Bailey’s next door for drinks, okay? See you boys when you get back,” Eloise said.

Leo groaned and took one of both their hands, pulling them towards the stairs. “Okay, okay, we’re going now.”

Finn sent Eloise a last grin, which probably didn’t thwart her ideas at all, and let Leo pull him away.

They climbed the stairs too close together, their feet barely missing each other.

“This house is so cool,” Logan said. “I see why you miss it. It feels like home.”

“Yeah,” Finn said, eyeing the bookshelves that lined the hallway they were going down, caught in dusty light between windows. “I like it here.”

And they were finally alone.

Finn used Leo’s hand to pull him into his chest, and kissed him hard. Leo sighed into it, and Finn felt Logan at their sides a moment later.

“Leo,” Logan urged, and then Finn was watching them kiss. It was like breathing.

“Missed you two,” Leo panted when Logan finally let him go. “Jesus.”

They stood there between the sun streaks coming through the window, swaying a little together.

“Lo, do you want to take your shower?”

Logan raised his head from Leo’s chest and looked up at him. “What?”

Leo nodded his head in what Finn assumed was the direction of the nearest bathroom. “You take showers after you go on planes.”

Logan’s expression went soft.

“You can,” Leo said. “But then we’re going out.”

Logan’s eyebrows drew together. “Out?”

“Yeah,” Leo’s smile was slow and he began tugging them down the hall. “I wanna show you guys stuff. Take you out to dinner.”

“But I haven’t seen you in…” Logan asked. “And I need to go out into public right away?”

“Not that we won’t have time for that,” Leo stopped in front of a door. “But that can happen at dinner. You think I’m not dying, too?”

“At dinner,” Finn repeated, then looked at Logan. “He says we can have sex at dinner, Leo, how the hell can we have sex at dinner, where are you taking us?”

Leo grinned and sat up. “You’ll see. Lo?”

“I don’t want to shower, I want to have sex at dinner apparently,” Logan said, then pulled Leo closer. “I just want to be with you.”

Leo toured them all around, drove them through wide and narrow streets, watched as Logan purchased some sort of rum-filled, sugary drink that Logan forced Finn to take a sip of. There were beads hanging from trees, colorful and glinting in the sunlight.

The sun was beginning to lower in the sky, the heat receding a little, when they pulled up to the docks.

It made Leo golden as he pulled two coolers from the trunk, and then walked them down the boards. Logan couldn’t look away.

“Here she is,” Leo grinned, and gestured towards a small motorboat, glossy white with wake-boards hooked to the top, and leather seats. “Our restaurant for the night.”

“Oh,” Finn said. “I see.”

“Sex on a boat,” Logan nodded.

“Dinner on a boat,” Leo said.

Logan walked forward and wrapped his arms around him. “You on a boat.”

Leo smiled before climbing carefully aboard and setting the coolers down by the steering wheel. “C’mon.”

Finn gave Logan a little shove as he was climbing into the boat, but laughed when Logan flinched, holding tightly onto his shoulders.

“Mais, non!” Logan laughed as they jostled each other onto the slightly more solid ground. He shoved him back once they were on firm footing. “Harz.”

Finn laughed and fell back onto one of the leather seats, warmed by the sun. “Now I see, we’ll be in the surrounded by water. If some type of water police catches us, is that bad?”

“Water police?” Leo laughed. He sent Logan a soft smile when Logan began helping him untie the ropes and bring the buoys in.

Finn grinned. “Well, now you’re both going on sailor on me. Untying rope.”

Leo snorted and threw a loop of his rope over Finn’s head, pulling until it pulled Finn’s neck forward lightly.

“Sailor, huh?”

Finn smiled lazily up at him. “Yeah.”

Logan wished they were out on the water already, so he could kiss Leo like he wanted to, but instead he settled for helping him push the boat away from the docks while Leo started the engine. He’d flipped his sunglasses down over his eyes, and Logan followed.

“You’ve been on a boat before, Tremz,” Leo said when Logan came to stand beside him at the wheel. Leo was perched on the top of the chair, long legs stretching down to the ground. He looked relaxed and happy.

“Yeah, at home. My friend had one growing up. We’d go out on the lake in the summer. Fish sometimes, or swim.”

They were pulling away from the land, and every second made Logan happier. The wind picked up with the engine until they were flying. Finn shouted over the roar and Logan looked back, squinting in the sun as he tried to smile for the phone Finn was holding up. He probably looked stupid, but he didn’t care. Because now the docks were small, the shore was far away, and he could push against Leo’s side. The wind was cool, and Leo’s chest through his t-shirt was sun-warmed. Logan pressed his nose against him. He smelled like the sun, too. Leo kissed his forehead, one hand on the wheel, and one around Logan’s back. Logan hoped Finn was taking a picture of this, too. Logan had never really hoped for pictures before.

“Love you,” Leo said, voice close to his ear to be heard.

Logan tilted his head against Leo’s chest and reached out to trace the muscles in his forearm that flexed as he steered the boat.

“Love you, too,” Logan replied.

Leo smiled and drew the speed down until the motor was a steady bubble, and the heat warmed the goosebumps on Logan’s arms from the wind.

“This is nice,” Finn sighed and Logan looked back to see him sprawled over a flat, padded area at the back of the boat, eyes closed.

There was some type of board walk in the distance, but mostly they were shaded by a ring of gnarled looking trees that made a U-shaped little cove. Leo dropped anchor, and they had it all to themselves. The sun was lower but still hot, and Leo pulled out a canopy from somewhere among the equipment above, pinning to the sides of the boat so that it stretched like a tent above them. It offered shade. Seclusion.

“Pre-dinner swim, what do you think?” Leo asked before stripping off his shirt.

“What?” Finn sat up. “I didn’t wear—”

The words died in his mouth, though, when Leo, practically smirking, undid the buttons of his shorts next. Logan felt his pulse jump at the sound of Leo slowly pulling his zipper down.

“Oh,” Finn said, then laughed.

“Yeah?” Leo asked.

“Ouais, ouais,” Logan said. “Leo.”

Leo grinned and reached for Logan again, pulling his t-shirt over his head for him, then leaning down for a kiss, hands on Logan’s chest.

“I’m just having fun imagining you planning this,” Logan heard Finn say. “‘I’m gonna get Finn and Logan on my boat, and then I’m gonna get them naked, in the water, and then I’m gonna feed them dinner.’”

“You’ve never been skinny dipping before, Fish?” Leo said, pulling away, eyes lingering on where Logan was kicking off his shorts, too.

“Nope,” Finn said, rolling onto his back to push his shorts off before standing and ridding himself of his shirt. “But I’m extremely open to it. Sunscreen. I need sunscreen.”

Leo walked forward and wrapped his arms around Finn, tucking his hands right into his briefs to cup his ass. “Sun’s never seen this, huh.”

“First time for everything,” Finn said after a moment, and kissed Leo soundly as he pushed his briefs down.

Logan, to his own surprised, didn’t feel exposed standing there naked on Leo’s boat. The sun was orange, low enough to turn the clouds pink, and it dappled through the trees, making the water look smooth and inviting. He put one foot on the side of the boat and looked over. He could see the bottom, sandy and rocky, but it was deep enough to jump.

“I’m dating a couple of Greek gods,” Finn sighed. “Fuck, Tremz, you look like one of those statues. My own Patroclus and Achilles.”

Leo laughed. “Who does that make you?”

Finn looked into the water, too, before stepping up onto the padded back he was dozing on before. “Apollo, come to crash the party.”

And he jumped, making the boat rock.

Leo pressed up behind Logan, all skin on warm skin. “Ça va?”

“This heat’s gonna kill me,” Logan grinned, looking back and up at him. “Allez.”

Finn surfaced, shaking his hair out of his eyes. “Come on, it’s perfect here.”

Leo pressed up and over the side of the boat like a jump over the boards, before tucking himself neatly into a canon ball and giving Finn a face full of salty water.

“Come on, Lo!”

Finn and Leo looked up at him, and Logan could barely believe it all.

Logan didn’t jump into anything except fights. Throwing the gloves down was easy. There were time limits to the consequences, and they were never anything more than a few minutes. Everything else—who knew what would happen. Logan wasn’t a jumper. Finn was. Finn always had been. While Logan watched and waited and thought and didn’t, Finn loved and went and acted and did. And Leo…Leo jumped more than anyone gave him credit for. Logan hadn’t been eighteen when he got to the NHL, and he didn’t know how he would have turned out if he had been.

“It’s super nice,” Leo called up.

Finn splashed the water. “C’mon, baby.”

Logan smiled, looking down at them, and jumped. The water was beyond relieving. The salt stung his eyes a little, but it felt good, in the way salt water did. Logan knew it would dry on his skin later and feel even better. When he came up and shook the water from his eyes, Finn had dived down to touch the bottom and Leo was smiling at him.

“Nice?”

Logan pushed forward until he could wrap his arms and legs around Leo. He felt—clingy, he guessed. Since being apart. He could feel every part of Leo against him and Leo made a pleased sound.

“Very,” Logan said.

Leo let them float for a minute before they sank under the water again. Leo kissed him, surprising Logan with his eyes closed, and Logan had to come up for air and to laugh.

Finn floated beside him, the sky darkening a little and revealing the first of its stars. Logan looked up at the anchored boat, and thought about how they had all night.

“The Cup arrives tomorrow,” Finn said as they floated together.

Leo grinned. “Crazy. They’re throwing a parade for me. I think it’s gonna be insane.”

“You deserve all the parades,” Finn said.

Leo rolled his eyes but smiled. “I just wish…” he looked between them.

“You deserve that, too,” Logan said. “Whenever it comes.”

Leo’s smile was still happy, if not wistful. “Yeah.”

“I can’t believe we’re here,” Logan said. “And I mean here here, but also…here.”

“Better start believing it,” Finn tread closer and pulled Logan back against him. Logan laughed, but it was true. He did feel like he was starting—starting everything anew.

This could be the first kiss we forgive ourselves for, Finn had said.

And—Logan did. He forgave. He loved them.

They climbed up the ladder at the back of the boat a while later, limbs tired from racing and treading water, and Leo pulled towels out for them from under a seat. They were big and well-loved, and Logan got as much water out of his hair as he could before draping it over the front seats to dry and stepping back into his underwear.

“Just three naked dudes on a boat,” Finn said absentmindedly as he pulled his shorts back on. “It’s getting dark.”

“That’s why we have these,” Leo said and produced two lanterns and a few candles from another compartment that Logan hadn’t noticed. He hooked the lanterns to the ceiling and turned them on. They bathed everything in a soft, yellow light.

“Hungry?” he asked while lighting the candles.

“Yes,” Finn sighed. He grabbed Logan’s hand and pulled him down onto one of the seats, gathering him against his chest. Logan sunk back into it.

“Hey, Lo, smile,” Finn said, and then he had his phone out, camera flipped to show them. Finn ducked so that their cheeks were pressed together and pressed a palm over Logan’s heart. With Finn’s chest pressed to his back, Logan could feel Finn’s. They both looked sun-tanned and, even to himself, deliriously happy.

“Tremz, can you pull that part out there? It’s like a little table from the back just beside you.”

Logan leaned forward and found the plastic divot that Leo was gesturing to. It slid out from beneath the cushion and into a temporary table, which Leo, underwear now on, set the coolers on top of. He looked at the two of them.

“I’m about to blow your mind.”

“You do that often,” Finn said, fingers drumming on Logan’s thigh.

Leo smiled. “No. Really.” He opened the cooler and brandished it towards them. “Crab.”

Inside the cooler was ice and crab legs.

“Crab,” Finn repeated.

“The mind blowing part comes when you eat it. It’s in season. Now, here we’ve got potatoes and some corn and hopefully some of it’ll be warm but…I wanted it on the boat, so…small sacrifices. Got some beer, too, if you want it,” Leo pulled it out from below the ice, setting things on the table as he talked. Logan was going to kiss him.

“And I’ve got strawberry shortcakes,” Leo said, and he was blushing a little. “For my strawberry and my…”

“Shortcake,” Finn laughed.

Leo laughed and leaned down to kiss Logan’s scowl. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, I laugh every time I think about it I had to, you’re not short, really.”

“You sound so convincing.”

“You’re not, but you sure are a cake,” Leo kissed him again, squeezing his thighs, and Logan smiled this time.

“I guess I can live with that,” Logan said, and kissed him back.

“Cream’s on ice, too, so that’s good. And…yep.” Leo reached into the cooler and held up what looked like a hammer. “Y’all know how to eat crab?”

“Why…is that hot,” Finn said, and Logan nodded. Leo just smiled.

They made a mess on top of the table cloth Leo had set out, laughing as they cracked the shells and sucked out the meat.

“I’m so bad at this,” Finn said, picking his way through one of the last bits.

“Here,” Leo leaned over and broke into the shell with practiced fingers.

“How?”

Leo smiled and shrugged.

Logan watched the two of them, finishing off his own. He looked around them in the darkness. They were lit by the candlelight now, and the lanterns. The sky still had some light, but the sun was below the horizon and it would soon be gone. It was like it was only the three of them in the world. The stars were plentiful and vast from where they were sitting in the back, but the lantern hanging in the center of the little canopy Leo had set up made it look like their own little tent, private and out of sight.

“Where did you fall?” Finn asked.

“When did I fall?” Leo said. “For you? Um. Probably when you—”

“Non, non,” Finn laughed softly. “Where. Where did you hit your head?”

Leo tilted his head. “What? Oh! Oh, getting onto the boat.” He pointed to the side, and then towards the steering wheel. “Hit my head on the windshield corner.”

Finn hissed through his teeth. “Ouch.”

“Yeah, it wasn’t pretty,” Leo said, but smiled as Logan reached out to touch the lighter hair.

“When did you fall, though?” Logan asked, and Leo smiled.

“I don’t know, exactly,” Leo kicked the cooler out from beneath the table and retrieved the strawberries and cream he had pointed to before, as well as three fluffy looking biscuits. “I guess just…doing stuff together.” Leo laughed as he prepared the desert, scooping strawberries onto the breads. “I sort of thought it was just adrenaline at first. Me wanting you, I mean. But then we were roommates, at home or away, and then we starting hanging out off the rink and…well, I loved you.” Leo pushed the plates towards them. “I loved you both.”

Logan tilted his head back, heart feeling tight again.

“I know we went back to Harvard,” Finn said suddenly. “And I know what you said about feeling like you missed out a while back. I don’t know, I just want to make sure you know that we missed you the whole time.”

“How,” Leo began, looking between them. “How are you now?”

Logan wasn’t sure which one of them he was talking to, but he looked back at Finn who tightened his arms around him.

“We got some stuff out,” Finn said, then laughed a little. “And I guess I sort of…let some stuff in.”

“And I said sorry,” Logan said.

“And I forgave you,” Finn kissed his cheek. “But also you forgave you.”

Logan rolled his eyes but smiled as he took a bite. “Yeah, I know.”

Leo leaned back in his seat, smiling at the two of them. “Good.”

Finn sighed. “And then this one came, like, three times.”

Leo laughed out loud. “That is his way.”

Logan groaned. “I can’t help it.”

“Oh, baby,” Finn laughed. “We don’t want you to help it.” Then, he looked back up at Leo. “But, really. We missed you, Peanut.”

“We don’t like being without you.”

“Me too,” Leo said softly. “I don’t know, I just…it’s funny being in the NHL, in Gryffindor, and then coming home to aunts and uncles and older cousins. Like, to them, I’m still just sort of nineteen. And I am nineteen, but…I don’t know I’ve been feeling like I used to feel. Being home. Being without you.” Leo looked out at the water. “Like I’m right back where I started, not out to anyone except my parents, just some kid with this really tedious dream and sort of—ready to be lonely forever.”

“Leo,” Logan said.

Leo looked at them and laughed a little, pushing his hair back. “That was my long way of saying that I missed you, too. And in saying that…” he bit his lip and stood. “I have something.”

“You have something?”

Leo waved his hand as he bent at the floor, popping up a storage pit. “Planned, I have something planned. That I’ve always wanted to do with…well, with a boyfriend. Boyfriends.”

Logan looked back at Finn. “Boyfriends.”

Then, Leo started pulling out blankets. And pillows. His smile was giddy as he lay them out beneath the canopy, the boat rocking gently, and the pillows piled high. Leo gestured to it with both hands when he was done.

“Sex on a boat.”

“That sounds like the name of a tropical drink,” Finn said.

Logan nodded. “I’m in.” He stood, the blankets soft beneath his bare feet as he walked over the bed to pull Leo to him. “You’re so…”

“Sweet?” Finn said, and Logan smiled.

“Oui.”

Finn took one step up and then fell into the center of the blankets, stretching out on his back. Leo took Logan by the hands, sitting down and pulling Logan down with him. Logan sank slowly, knees straddling Leo’s hips, laying his head against Leo’s chest.

Finn turned onto his side so he was closer to them and ran a hand through Logan’s hair. “Leo hog.”

“Va te faire,” Logan grumbled and raised an eyebrow when Finn made a face. “You don’t know what I said.”

“Tone of voice,” Finn laughed. “Move over a little, then, I missed him, too.”

Leo put an arm out for Finn to roll into, face tucking against his shoulder. “I’ll just sit here watching y’all fight over me.”

Logan leaned down to press kisses to Finn’s face at the same time Leo did, and Finn made a soft sound.

“Look at you,” Leo laughed and wrapped his arm more tightly around Finn. “Letting us snug you.”

Finn laughed a little, too, but it was different somehow in Logan’s ears. Something was bothering him. “I let you snug me.”

“Yeah, for a second, and then you snug us.”

“We snug each other.”

Logan snorted and met Leo’s eyes over Finn’s head.

“Well, fine, fine.” Leo stroked Finn’s hair, cheek resting at Finn’s temple. “This is nice, though.”

Finn just pushed closer and Logan reached out a stroke his fingers over his neck. They were quiet, full and sun-tired and sated, until Finn sat up on the blankets and turned to face them, cross-legged.

“Guys,” Finn began.

“Hm?” Leo responded.

Logan pushed himself up onto a forearm on Leo’s chest. Something was wrong.

“I was thinking…” Finn cleared his throat. “I was thinking.”

“Who, you?” Logan tried, seeing if Finn would smile. When he did, Logan’s chest eased a little.

“I was thinking about trying something.”

“Okay,” Leo said. “Sure, what is it?”

Finn let out a shaky breath. Then, he looked between them.

“You and Lo,” Finn began. “You two like it when I fuck you and…I don’t know, maybe—I’d…like it, too.”

Logan felt his entire body flush with a spike of heat. It was a like his heart tried to slow down and speed up all at once, like a full-force tug. Oh.

Finn looked down at his hands. The top of his nose and cheeks were a little red from the sun, his hair curly from the salt, and he wanted—

Logan let himself drop back down, forehead against Leo’s shoulder. He was turned on. He was dizzy with it.

“Finn,” Leo’s voice was faint, his fingers pressing into the skin of Logan’s bare back.

“We don’t have to tonight,” Finn said. “I’d seriously be happy, more like fucking elated, with any and all, I was just—”

“Would you want to, though?” Leo asked. “Tonight, I mean? Because I…I’d want to.”

“I might not like it,” Finn said. “But yeah. Yeah.”

They both looked at Logan and all Logan could do was stare at Finn.

“You…” Logan was already nodding. “Finn.”

“Lay down, lay down,” Leo sat up and took Finn’s hands, pulling him until Finn was on his back again.

Logan pushed up from Leo to settle on Finn’s other side, hand going to rest above the zip of Finn’s shorts. Finn glanced up at him while Leo got up and reached for the glove box.

“Since when?” Logan asked Finn, leaning down to press a kiss to his mouth.

“I don’t know,” Finn said, hips pushing up gently against Logan’s hand, which was rubbing him gently through his shorts. “It’s not like I never thought about it, but I never…thought thought about it until…well, the night we won the Cup.”

“The Cup?” Leo said, settling back down between Finn’s legs.

“Yeah,” Finn tilted his head to the side, eyes going a little foggy. “It was just—a really intense night. I mean all of it, winning, the parties…”

“The sex,” Logan finished for him, and he was dizzy all over again. It had been intense, making their way back to their apartment and falling into Finn’s bed. The night had stretched forever. It had been fierce, rolling into each other, keeping each other weighted down, close and safe from floating away with it all.

Finn smiled. “Yeah. You two. I…I like being that close to you. And I thought maybe you could be that close to me, too.”

Leo put his hand over Logan’s. It pressed Logan’s palm harder against where Finn was growing stiff in his clothes. Leo popped the button open and leaned down to kiss over the hard muscles of Finn’s stomach.

“Just tell us how it goes, okay?” Leo said. “We can switch it up if you want.”

“Literally,” Finn laughed, but it was breathless.

Logan could tell he was nervous, could feel his heart beneath his palm. He leaned over, the pendant of his necklace falling onto Finn’s skin, and kissed over where his palm had been.

Leo pulled Finn’s shorts off while Logan kept him busy with hard, lingering kisses. Leo looked up at them and felt as surreal as ever. Ever since the Cup, Leo had been waking up every morning and reciting the list of events to himself, almost making sure they still felt real.

Finn. Logan. Falling in love. Making best friends. Coming out to them. Winning a Cup. Falling more in love. Taking Logan and Finn home. Knowing they missed him. Experiencing a sort of trust that he’d never even known before.

Finn’s skin was soft beneath his hands. There was salt dried on it, and he bent to taste the clean scent of it. It mixed with Finn’s arousal, making him ache. Finn’s cock was half hard, twitching as Leo eased his palms around it, not quite touching. He hadn’t been sure if Finn would ever want to be fucked. He and Logan had talked about it a few times, wondering if they should ask again, but they had decided to let Finn bring it up, if he wanted. And now—

“Lay back,” Logan was laughing, palm on Finn’s chest.

“I want to see,” Finn said.

Leo snorted. “You’re not really going to be able to see anything yet.”

“But…”

“You’re such a baby,” Logan sighed, but stood, kicking his clothes off and then sliding behind Finn, cradling him between his thighs and arms. Finn was still slumped low, and Logan smiled at Leo, resting his chin on Finn’s shoulder as he wrapped a hand around his cock. “There.”

Leo watched them, getting out of his shorts and squeezing his hardening cock, and then Finn looked up at him.

Finn gave him a smile. “Okay, cool, ready.”

“Cool,” Leo laughed, but instead of reaching down, he pushed forward onto his hands and knees, hovering over Finn’s body. “That’s not what you do for us, though, is it?”

Finn blinked. “What?”

Leo bent to kiss Finn’s neck, pressing their hips together so that Logan could wrap his hand around both of them at once. Finn gasped and Leo fucked into Logan’s fist, their cocks rubbing together in his tight hold.

“You make sure we know how much you love us first, Harzy,” Leo said. “Right?”

Leo felt Logan bend to kiss the other side of Finn’s neck. “Right.”

Finn was breathing harder now. “Right…”

Leo leaned back to capture Finn in a kiss, muscles tensing as Logan jacked them quicker.

“You’re gonna come so much, sweetheart, I know it.”

Logan laughed gently. “We’ve talked about it.”

“Talked about it?” Finn asked, hands moving down to press into Leo’s ass. “When?”

“Sometimes,” Leo smiled and reached down to stroke over Finn’s thigh. He leaned back, out of Logan’s reach, his cock hard falling heavily against his thighs. “Don’t get him too good, Tremz.”

Logan retrieved his hand, stroking them down Finn’s sides instead. Finn’s cock was red and sticking straight out, wet at the tip.

“Fuck,” Finn breathed.

Leo uncapped the lube with one hand and bent to suck Finn’s cock into his mouth while he warmed it between his fingers.

“Leo…” Finn said, and then cut off when Leo gently pressed his first fingertip in.

“D’accord?” Leo heard Logan whisper, and Finn whispered a yes back. But Finn was tight, every muscle Leo could feel taught around him.

“Relax, mon rouge,” Logan whispered. “You’re okay, we’ve got you.”

Leo pulled off his cock and sat back, working his finger gently.

“I’m just not used to it,” Finn said, glancing down to try and see. “I think I need something to do.”

Logan snorted. “Of course you do.”

Leo looked up from his fingers. “I have a Rubik’s Cube around here somewhere.”

Finn laughed out loud, his head falling back into Logan’s chest right as Leo pushed in a little farther and—

“Oh,” Finn jolted, smile going slack. “Oh, fuck.”

Logan smoothed his hands down Finn’s chest. “Yeah?"

Finn’s hand reached down to grip Logan’s wrist as Leo brushed inside of him again, a strangled breath punching out of him.

Leo bent once again to suck him gently. He himself was aching and trying to starve off thoughts of pressing inside of Finn, just to calm down. Finn was panting, mouth open. He had planted his feet on the blankets and pushed back when Leo added a second finger. His cock drooled a sticky strand down his chest.

“Merde,” Logan said faintly. He reached out with his finger tip to trace along a vein in Finn’s cock and Finn jolted. “Do you like it, Harzy?”

Finn’s laugh tumbled out of him. “I guess. Leo—”

Leo had added a second finger. Finn laughed again, throwing an arm over his eyes. “Oh, fuck.”

“I didn’t know you would laugh through this,” Logan said.

“I didn’t know it would feel like this.”

“So you’re laughing?”

Finn tilted his head back to look up at Logan. “I’m between my boys who are all naked and pretty and warm. I’m happy. Fuck, Leo…”

Leo smiled. “Aw, Harzy. Can I add another? Is it okay?”

Finn nodded. “Okay, okay. What’s that, three?”

“Three, sweetheart,” Leo smiled, leaning down to kiss his hip, then the base of his cock.

“Sweetheart,” Finn breathed nonsensically, smile still on his face even though his eyes had slipped shut. “Yeah, yeah, there…”

Leo looked up at Logan and they smiled at each other. Logan’s cheeks were flushed, hair curlier than Leo had ever seen it from the salt water. His eyes were hooded and he was holding Finn against him, hips rocking forward gently.

“Still okay?” Leo said. “I think you’re ready, what do you think?”

Logan ducked down to kiss Finn’s cheek. “Want Leo, mon rouge?”

Finn nodded. “Yeah. I want Leo.”

Leo tilted his head as he gave Finn one last push, crooking his fingers up to make him groan.

“Okay, Harz,” Leo said and leaned forward to kiss him, licking into his mouth. He pulled back just enough to see Finn, eyes closed and waiting for another kiss. “This makes us feel so good,” Leo mumbled, and kissed him again. “We love you like this.”

Finn made a soft noise, eyes opening. “Good.”

Leo nipped his lip gently and pulled back, reaching for the lube again.

He pushed into Finn careful, so slowly, stopping at the first press.

“Fuck,” Finn’s palms pressed into the blankets, fingers curling for something to hold onto. He pushed back against Logan. “Fuck, fuck.”

Leo went to pull back.

“No, no, no, no,” Finn said. “Go, go, go.”

Leo took a shaky breath and pushed forward again. He watched himself sink into Finn and then had to stop, half way into the tight heat and breathing hard. His cock pulsed with the feeling, with the visual and the knowledge that this was Finn.

“Okay, Harzy?” Logan said.

Leo could hear the waves lapping at the boat as Finn nodded. Finn reached forward for Leo’s hip, guiding him the rest of the way.

Leo rocked forward and the boat seemed to rock with them. Finn’s heels slipped against the blankets and he let out a low whine that Leo had never heard before. Finn wasn’t loud.

“Shit,” Leo closed his eyes and then looked at Logan, who was practically holding Finn up. He pressed in harder, making sure he pulled all the way out before sinking in again. Finn wasn’t like Logan, who pushed back as good as he got. Finn went a little boneless, head thrown back against Logan’s shoulder and his eyes closed. Leo clutched his thighs for leverage and fucked him.

“Yes, yes…” Finn kept saying, words slurred together.

Logan whimpered and his head tilted back in a way Leo knew all too well. He was coming, hidden behind Finn, probably from the pressure of Finn’s back rubbing against him—probably from Finn’s harsh breathing.

Finn’s eyes flashed open when he felt Logan’s heat streak his back, and his cock jumped.

“Leo,” Finn said. “Logan—”

“I know, sweetheart,” Leo fucked in faster. “Lo?”

Logan just bent to mouth along Finn’s neck. Leo could see his hips fucking forward as he rode out his high, clutching Finn against him. When he stilled, he turned Finn’s head to press a lingering kiss to his mouth.

“Lay back now, Harzy,” he said, and slid carefully from behind him.

Leo smiled into the kiss that Logan knelt to give him, palms smoothing over his shoulders. Logan looked soft and sated in the lantern light, all gentle curves and broad muscles.

“J’adore,” Logan murmured.

“Tremz…”

“Guys,” Finn panted.

Leo leaned forward and kissed him where he was against the pillows, red hair wild and splayed out. Logan stretched out beside them, hand looping around Finn’s cock.

“How does it feel?” Logan said. “Knutty’s so good.”

Leo groaned, the words spreading heat right through him. He had been feeling strange lately, being home after so much change had been getting to him. But seeing them, stretched out in front of him, and feeling Finn around him—Finn, who had always taken care of him… Leo knew he had changed. And not even being home, something he loved so much and was so comfortable with, could change him back.

“Does it always feel like this?” Finn murmured, then looked from Logan to Leo. “Do I feel like this?”

He pushed into Finn again, grinding close. “Yeah, Harzy. This is how you make us feel.”

Leo pushed in twice more, and then Finn was coming, seizing up around Leo and dripping over Logan’s fingers in hot waves.

“Fuck,” Logan’s voice broke. “You always come so…”

Finn just made a soft sound, the tendons of his neck going tight as he let out a breath. “Keep—”

Logan’s hand sped up around him, Leo pushing into him at a steady pace. Finn let Logan run a hand through his hair, coaxing him through it. Then Logan looked back at Leo, reaching a hand down to feel where Leo was pushing into Finn one last time until he stilled when Finn’s breathing seemed to calm. Together, Logan and Leo smoothed their hands over Finn’s hips as Leo pulled out carefully, shiny from the lube and his own precome. Leo ached with the loss, but Finn was twitching away now, sated and oversensitive.

“So?” Leo said.

“Huh,” Finn sighed, eyes shut. He cupped a hand over his cock, opened his eyes, and smiled sleepily. “I see now.”

“Is this a new thing?” Logan asked.

“Yeah,” Finn said, then bit his lip. “But I think I like doing it to you guys more.”

Leo tilted his head against Logan, enjoying the way Finn was looking at them. Like they were his. Like he was theirs.

They pressed Leo back into the blankets and got him off slowly, and Leo felt like it was forever before his sweat was cooling on his skin, and he came to with his hands in their hair, their mouths kissing along his chest and shoulders.

The night was cooler now, too, and Finn brought the blankets up over them. He was propped on one elbow and Leo watched him stroke light fingers down Logan’s arm, then reach to brush Leo’s hair back.

“I love you guys, you know?” Finn said. “I didn’t really think I’d ever want that…but I don’t think it was actually that, I think it was more…”

“Trust?” Leo finished when he trailed off.

“Yeah,” Finn said softly.

Logan nodded. “Knutty, you’re…”

“You make us trust,” Finn said, and Logan nodded again. “Trust ourselves, trust each other. Trust the world.”

Leo opened his mouth to say something, but he didn’t know what. The boat rocked beneath them from some unseen wave. It brushed them closer, all soft, sunned skin.

Logan saved Leo the trouble. He seemed to just know and cuddled himself closer beneath the blankets. They would leave for Canada soon, for a last, wild ride with the Cup. Then, they would spend the remainder of the summer in Gryffindor. But it didn’t feel like a remainder. None of it did. It felt like the rest of Leo’s life.

Leo looked at them, and looked at the stars. He didn’t need the far away things anymore to feel like he was home.

#coast to coast #sweater weather #coast to coast lumosinlove #sweater weather lumosinlove #o'knutzy #finn x leo x logan #finn o'hara #lumosinlove ocs #Logan tremblay #Leo knut #smut #o'knutzy smut #harry potter #Harry Potter fic

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watevermelon · 4 years ago

Text

Cheater!Akaashi x Reader

✧ Summary: (Continuation) Akaashi is still in love with you and begs for your forgiveness.

➳ A/N: It surprised me how many people wanted a part 2 to Akaashi’s initial cheating imagine, but here we are!! Ask and you shall receive. People want good things for the reader and I agree -- that’s too bad this is what we got instead LMAO ➳ Masterlist ➳ Part One

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You could’ve gone the rest of your high school career without ever having to hear the word volleyball ever again. The only interest you had in it was from your ex-boyfriend and now any reminder just left a bitter pang in the pit of your stomach.

Thankfully, Akaashi was not in your class and there actually were not any volleyball players in your homeroom. But that didn’t stop them from popping up in your peripherals or in some rumours around school.

Some of the members of the volleyball team would shoot looks at you, whether out of pity or curiosity, you couldn't care less. You fostered your own relationships with the athletes individually - whether it was Haruki’s strange brand of humor, Sarukui’s constant references to memes, or Wataru’s lopsided smiles - you knew them.

You shared, or rather suffered together, in a class with Konoha the year before. A bright first year with no friends yet, Konoha was a nice person and the first one of the entire volleyball team to actually speak to you. He was even the one to introduce you to both Akaashi and Bokuto.

Out of the bunch, Konoha was often a tag-along when it came to hangouts. Whether it was to the arcade or the movie theatres, you and your (ex)boyfriend were quick to include the others. And usually Bokuto and Konoha would come along as well. Looking back, now you felt like an idiot, Konoha was one thing, but Bokuto was always there.

Nonetheless, as a member of the volleyball team, you knew Konoha was close to Akaashi. And there was no doubt which side he would be taking, no matter the moral high-ground.

There was too much history there and there would be no attempt on your part to salvage the friendships you had with the volleyball team.

There was no doubt of the curiosity in everyone’s minds the moment you and Akaashi were broken-up and there was a new person he was holding hands with. It went from general confusion to malicious rumours. Akaashi was the silent boy next door, the person everyone thought to be the perfect boyfriend without a bad bone in his body.

Some said that he broke up with you because you were too mean, too boring, or he simply lost interest in your boring lifestyle.

If only other people knew what he had done to you and Bokuto.

You didn’t believe this was the hill you wanted to die on. And so you ignored the carefully whispers that followed you in the hallways. Your best friends urged you to clear your name - you were the wronged party so why must you be the one to continue suffering? But this was not something you wanted to bring up again, not something you wanted to think about and relive after how painful it was the first time.

But it seemed the volleyball Gods really hated you.

Konoha approached you one day, after class had just ended but before extracurricular clubs were about to start.

“Hi.” He stood beside your locker as you organized your things, “Can we talk?”

You nodded wordlessly, packing up your bookbag and following him out the door. He guided you toward the outside fountain by the athletic building, not many students passing by as they rushed home through the main entrance. A part of you worried that some of the other volleyball members would pass by as you sat there together, but then you realized that it was no longer your problem.

You were seated on the edge, silently watching his pensive expression before he finally turned to you.

“I feel like I owe you an apology.” He started.

“What, why?”

“I could’ve told you a year ago that something strange was happening between Akaashi and Bokuto.”

You felt a lump in your throat, not sure what to say.

He shook his head and turned away, “There was something there even before you two were dating. And so even when Akaashi asked you out, I bet you were surprised?’

You frowned, but agreed quietly with a nod of your head.

“We barely knew each other at the time.”

Konoha scoffed, you were unsure why exactly, but he continued, “Out of curiosity, why did you agree?”

You smiled back wistfully at the memory, remembering how you had excitedly texted your friends on how the Akaashi Keiji had asked you to be his girlfriend.

“It was so simple back then.” You explained, “He was the kind, pretty setter of the nationally-ranked volleyball team. It was shallow, based off of what little I heard about.”

“But you grew to love him.”

“Yeah.” You scoffed, “And look what that brought me.”

“I’m sorry.”

Haruki passed by, texting away on his phone, mind on something else before he spotted the two of you. He waved at Konoha first before his eyes landed on you, widening in obvious surprise before he shot you a genuinely wide smile.

“A lot of them miss you too.” Konoha explained.

“Well sorry, I tend to avoid anything regarding the volleyball team these days.”

“Don’t worry, as much as this sucks, we understand.” Konoha frowned, clenching one of his hands into a fist in annoyance at the situation.

“But I do miss you guys too.” You added.

Konoha smiled, fondly remembering the last time you had all gone to the arcade, “Who could forget the time you beat Haruki at Dance Dance Revolution?”

“He certainly did not.” You recalled, “He kept challenging me all the way up to mid-terms.”

Konoha laughed, no one on the team was able to defeat the libero. And yet here you were, all smiles and confidence radiating off of you, bringing the third year to his knees. It made Konoha wonder if the last year could have been different.

When Akaashi had approached you, Konoha had dutifully stood to the side. The setter was one of his closest friends and never had he approached anyone in the past. He was often busy with the team or Bokuto. And for Akaashi to have asked you, it meant he was serious. And so Konoha had stood to the side, his crush on you mollified if that meant you’d be happier with the setter your age.

If Konoha had the courage to ask you out instead, would you still be close to the volleyball team? Would you be celebrating an anniversary together rather than crying over some lecherous bastard he called a friend?

You sighed and turned to Konoha, registering his earlier words. “Why are you sorry?”

“What?”

“Why are you sorry about what happened with Akaashi?”

“Ah.” He raked an open palm through his hair. “Maybe I could have stopped you.”

“What?” You asked, a confused smile on your face.

“I introduced the two of you after all.” He explained.

“Shut up.” You said in a teasing tone, “No one could have stopped it. I was just dumb enough to fall for him.”

Konoha shot a small grin back at you, “Yeah, you were.”

Sighing loudly, you made sure you had all your stuff before standing. “I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah.” Konoha held out a hand for you to shake, “I hope we can still be friends.”

It was odd, to feel the small blossom of something in the pit of your stomach. This was Konoha, your friend of two years at this point. This was nothing more than him trying his best to affirm your friendship, you reminded yourself.

“I hope so too.”

And, to his credit, he really did try. It was simple things - you had each other’s chat ID’s from your shared class together and, every once in a while, he would send you a meme or a small tidbit of information. You still had things in common, subjects ranging from the current shounen anime and TV shows you kept up with.

It was refreshing to talk to him. Your friends had your back, but the school’s curiosity was not easily satisfied with time. People were naturally nosy, eager to know the true reasons behind your failed relationship. Both you and Akaashi had yet to even address it and it only got worse with Bokuto’s increasing PDA.

Thankfully, no one was audacious enough to actually approach you about the situation. No one else was involved in your relationship and they had no right to actually point fingers.

That was until someone had the audacity to come up to you during the free period, most of everyone on campus enjoying their lunches.

You were sitting at your usual table, waiting for your friends to come from their respective classrooms when one of the more annoying third-years came up to you.

You recognized her as president of the Fukurodani Volleyball fanclub, this should be fun.

“I think you should apologize to Akaashi-san.”

You closed your book and looked up. The usual bustle of the lunchroom was dying down, many people silencing as they turned to the interaction.

“What?”

“For wasting his time - he deserved so much better than you.” She bit out cruelly, the other girls behind her nodding in agreement. “And we all think it’s high time you beg for forgiveness.”

You stood up, pure annoyance rolling off of you. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh? I don’t?” She challenged, “Why would Akaashi date you of all people? And now that the two of you are broken-up he’s been sadder than I’ve ever seen him! This is your fault!”

You slapped your book down and raised your chin, “If that’s what you honestly think then you’re as ignorant as you are a meddling piece of shit.”

The murmurs that followed were obvious, people listening in to your harsh response.

She raised her hand as if to slap you, obviously offended at being called out to the entire lunchroom. “Why I outta --”

But the offending hand never came.

“Leave her alone.”

You could recognize your ex-boyfriend’s voice anywhere. Turning, you saw Bokuto enter your field of vision and grasp at her wrist in a tight hold, held high above your head. Akaashi was standing on the other side in front of you, an arm-outstretched as if to protect you from the group of girls.

“She didn’t do anything wrong.” Akaashi stated clearly, his gaze was unwavering from the girl, but you were sure that the entire room was now listening in. “It was me.”

She stuttered, attempting to save face, “Akaashi-san, surely that’s not true.”

He turned to her, his blank expression now marginally colder. “You have no idea what you are talking about.”

The mean third-year visibility recoiled, turning to you and apologizing under her breath. Bokuto swung her arm away, his glare enough to scare away the rest of the group, but the room was still obviously silent. Bokuto scanned the rest of the room with his tough stare, many people turning away and vainly attempting to restart their conversations.

Akaashi turned to you, an unsure expression on his face. There were words on the tip of his tongue, you were sure, since he looked as if there were a thousand things he wanted to say.

“I’m not going to say thanks.” You decided to start for him.

“I know.”

You wanted to turn away from him again, no words left for you to say or even scream at him through your anger. This was more than just some ex, you genuinely loved Akaashi and thought he was going to be your future. And from the way he acted, it seemed like the setter wanted that as well.

“There’s something I want to say.” Akaashi stated before you could flee.

“Maybe not here.” Bokuto tugged at your elbow, motioning to the nearest hallway with his chin.

You followed Akaashi wordlessly, Bokuto behind you to make sure you didn’t just run away. You sure that there were more than a few dozen pairs of eyes sticking to the backs of your strange trio.

Akaashi led you to a corner, no one to spy on your conversation unless they hung outside the building from the window. He moved to gently grasp your forearms, but you pushed him off before he could get a firm hold on you.

He frowned, but looked at you intently. “I wanted to say I’m sorry.”

“Okay.” You stated back plainly, “I can’t forgive you.”

Akaashi hesitated, a dejected look on his face. “I know.”

Every bone in your body was screaming at you to walk away, to stop looking at his despondent pout and not fall for his sad look. You remembered the first time you fell in love with his smile - how easy he would flash that beaming expression at you. How Akaashi would tell you how much he loved you and it filled your heart until it overflowed.

And now all of those memories were worth nothing.

Screw being a bigger man, your heart had a thousand things it wanted to say.

“I really loved you, you know.” You pushed at his shoulder, “And now I can’t look at you without feeling like I hate you.”

“I know.”

“I was so in love with you I thought this would be it.” You felt your heart crying, but urged the motion down. “Why kiss me and tell me you love me when you had someone else on your mind the entire time?!”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Akaashi looked just as anguished, trying to reach out to you with shy hands on your shoulders. “Please just listen to me.”

But you shoved him away this time, “What could you possibly have to say to me?”

“I love you.”

His blue eyes bore right into your own, determined and sure of his previous statement. Looking over his shoulder, Bokuto was standing to the side, his gaze stuck on you as well. How the hell was this normal?

“What?”

Akaashi paused, hands coming up to hold you but stopping short again when he realized that was the last thing you needed. “I’m in love with both of you.”

You huffed and took a step back, what could you possibly say to that? There was a sudden flurry of emotions just whirring around your mind - a rush of elation at being loved, immediately squashed down by the annoyed at Akaashi’s selfishness.

You turned to Bokuto, “You believe this?”

The wing-spiker frowned, but affirmed it in a loud voice. “Yes.”

“No.” You started back quickly, shaking your head. “I refuse to be part of this.”

“It’s true.” Akaashi pushed, moving toward you with an ernst expression on.

“I don’t care if it’s true or not.” You moved away again, but this time Akaashi did not let you evade him. Putting firm hands on your shoulders, he pulled you against his chest. “Stop.”

“I’m so sorry I hurt you, but I can’t.” Akaashi continued, “I love you and it hurts me so much that I hurt you in the process.”

You struggled against his hold until he let go. “How could I listen to you be so selfish?”

“I know.”

“Don’t involve me in this.” You motioned at the both of them in a wide circle.

“(F/N).” Akaashi stressed, eager to get you to see his side, but you wanted nothing to do with him or Bokuto. He broke your heart enough, there was no way you were willing to entertain him back in your life.

“What don’t you understand about leaving me alone?” You raised your voice, annoyed that Akaashi was asking anything of you after treating you so cruelly.

“Please let me explain.” Akaashi kept repeating.

There was nothing, absolutely nothing that Akaashi could say that would ever make you think about introducing him back into your life. He was terrible for lying to you for months, maybe even as long as a year, but you didn’t want to exactly ask the length of his infidelity. He was a terrible boyfriend and an even worse person - you were ready to raise hands at both boys if they didn’t let you go this instant.

Bokuto blocked your path this time, “(L/N), come on we just -- “

“What’s going on here?” A gentle hand fell on your shoulder, pushing Bokuto aside as a new person entered your conversation.

Konoha stood tall behind you, his sudden appearance quelling your rising anger. If not, you were sure that you were going to throw hands with the volleyball boys. Bokuto would probably fight you off, but slapping Akaashi would feel cathartic in a way.

“Ah, don’t worry about it.” Bokuto tried to wave away the other wing spiker. “We’re just talking.”

“(F/N), please. Let me explain it all to you.” Akaashi stressed, moving a step in your direction, to which Konoha challenged when he tilted his head upward.

“Right, just talking.” Konoha murmured in disbelief before turning to you. “And how do you feel?”

“I’ve had enough of this conversation.”

Both Akaashi and Bokuto exclaimed your name in contrasting tones, but you hardened your expression before turning away from them. Konoha still had a hand on your shoulder as you walked back to the lunchroom.

Your friends were already at your table, some of them standing around pacing while others were angrily chewing into their food. A chorus of your name followed as the two of you neared the table, some of them getting up from their seats to give you a comforting hug.

“(F/N)!” Your best friend was quick to rush you, crushing you between her arms. “We heard that Akaashi and Bokuto basically ushered you away.”

“The whole lunchroom was basically watching that door.” Another stated, pointing to the one you just came from.

Your best friend put her hands on your shoulder, steading your attention back to her. “Please tell me you remembered that men ain’t shit.”

Konoha laughed as he put a mocking hand of offense over his heart.

“Yeah, yeah.” You assured her, “I’m not about to make the same mistake again.”

“Good.” She confirmed, before turning to Konoha. “Okay, only Konoha has rights.”

“Thanks.” He stated back half-heartedly, guiding you back to your lunch and taking the seat beside you.

“When people told us they took you away, we weren’t sure what to do. Go after you? Call you to give you an out? We didn’t even know how long you had been gone for!” She explained, “Thankfully Konoha here came to the rescue.”

You turned to the wing-spiker, smiling as you did so. “He really did, thank you.”

He reflected a similar expression back at you, holding your gaze before springing away to take out his own lunch out of his bag.

“I take it back, the volleyball team has no rights with the exception of Konoha.” One of your friends joked.

As for you, you could not help but think back to the fond expression Konoha just shot you. It was so quick, and yet so genuine, you felt it pierce your heart so suddenly just to rip away from you when he turned away. But not in a bad way, per se.

If anything, this was a nice feeling, for a lack of a better term, to have again. You were not totally healed, still angry at both Akaashi and Bokuto for being complete fuckheads. But a part of you was still alive, happy to see Konoha as your friend and just maybe… maybe something else.

Akaashi and Bokuto returned back to the lunchroom silently, having left their stuff at their now fully occupied table. Bokuto didn’t bother to even turn in your direction, but Akaashi shot you a devastatingly sad frown as he passed.

A part of you wanted to comfort it, to leap out at the man who loved you for the past year. But you were thankfully steadied back to reality when Konoha put a gentle hand on your own. Akaashi’s gaze fell to the contact, making him stop entirely in his tracks. It was only when Bokuto grabbed his hand did the setter continue walking, but the shock on his face was palpable.

No matter, Akaashi was the last thing you wanted on your mind right now.

You upturned your hand and squeezed Konoha’s smiling at the third-year before turning back to your lunch.

The situation was far from resolved, you still had another two years at this drama-infested school and Akaashi seemed keen on explaining something to you. You were far from completely healed and it seemed the student body would not let this drama go unnoticed.

But you were getting there.

Little by little, you were re-learning to smile and laugh more. Places on campus were no longer bitter memories, but quiet lessons for you to remember. You had your loving best-friends and suddenly, the kind Konoha, at your side.

You had no worries about the rest of the school year, you would get through this with a head held high.

--------xXxXxXxXxXx--------

A/N: TBH for myself i could see this going both ways; reader saying nah OR reader entering a poly relationship. idk - i’ll write it if someone wants to see that ending but otherwise here we are :):

➳ Masterlist

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miyaniacs · 3 years ago

Text

The One Night Stand pt. 6

Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader / Satoru Gojo x fem!reader

Part 1 ; Pt. 2 ; Pt. 3; Pt. 4 ; Pt. 5

A/n: anddd angst is hereeeeeee - feedback is always welcome :) it act hurt to write this lol can you tell I had a small mental breakdown yesterday haha but at least it helped to write this chapter here :)

Warnings: angst; not proof read; nsfw ( minors do not read this), usage of the word whore, rough / angry sex

Characters: Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader , Satoru Gojo x fem!reader

Form: oneshot / short story

The whole ride home you stayed quiet. The image of Toji and the other women kissing, just wouldn’t leave your mind. And it did not stop there.

Your mind is creating all those scenarios. Scenarios that tell you that whenever he was on the phone, when you were with him, he was texting her, telling her about how badly he wants to see her again, telling her when you’d leave so she can come over. Him telling her about how bad you are and annoyed, her laying in his arms, naked with her perfect body, laughing about how pathetic you sound. How pathetic you ARE. Crushing on your best friend, fucking with another that is way out of your league, who’s probably just doing it for laughs. Who are you kidding? He definitely did it just for laughs. Saying all those things to you, to get a reaction out of you, just so he can make fun of it later on with her - or even during it, texting her how stupid you are. How fun it is to mess with you, how you started to look at him differently. How he waits at the door when you left, just to wrap his arms around her small frame, just seconds after you left. His hands on her thighs, lifter her up, placing his lips on hers while carrying her inside, laying her down on the bed, you were in just minutes ago.

Hell he was probably seeing her whenever he was away for missions.

Have they all been missions? Or was it just a weekend he wanted to spent with her and get away from you?

But... how are you to judge? You used him... to get over your best friend... And ended up falling for him instead. You never even questioned if he has someone else. You’ve been totally egoistic the whole time, he could have been in an open relationship with her. Toji isn’t one to tell you things by himself, but you never even thought of asking him?

All you did was use him, complain to him and in the end just leave.

Are you really in the position to cry now?

You feel a soft hand touching your arm.

“Hey, were back home.” You look into the blue eyes of your... boyfriend? Can you really consider him as your boyfriend, knowing that you stopped loving him weeks ago? Even before he officially became your boyfriend?

“Satoru.. I - “ His hand cups your cheek and you stopped talking.

“Let’s get inside... I feel like we both need to confess things.” He smiles sadly.

So here you are now. Sitting on the couch in his apartment starring at his inhumanly blue eyes, waiting for him to start talking.

“So... I’m not blind. Even tho most of the time I look like I am..” he jokes, but quickly stopped the second he sees your emotionale expression, “ Well... I know you like him.” He licks his lips and avoids your gaze.

“Satoru... look I’m sorry, I did not plan on playing you... I - I really thought that I still love you.” You whisper and fiddles with your fingers, “ I’m sorry for hurting you.”

“You did not... I- I’m actually relived.” He sighs and looks down. You’re eyes shoot up and you stare at his face.

“What?” Your body begins to shiver as you watch his lips open, the words leaving them seem unreal. Your brain refuses to accept that this is the truth, but the way he looks directly at you, his eyes showing nothing but honesty, you start to shake.

“How long did you plan to keep this act up?” You whisper.

“I hoped that it wouldn’t be an act the whole time... and that I learn to love you ... the way you do.. or did.” His eyes study your face, looking for any sign of emotion. Your eyes get glassy. Your body shakes. Your mouth is slightly open, but no words leave your lips. The tears now run freely down your face.

“Hey... Y/n..” He tries to pull you into a hug, to give you the hold and safety his hugs always provide you, but you quickly jump up and step away from him.

“Don’t touch me.” you’re voice shakes and is barely over a whisper, yet he heard your words and sees the hurt in your eyes. “Just.... don’t - don’t talk to me again... I - just leave me alone.” You walk backwards, your hands grab your hair, your brain can’t fully understand everything that is happening right now.

Gojo on the other hand knows exactly what is happening.

And he feels his heart break.

He is loosing his best friend.

The one person that always stayed at his side, since school you where with him and you stayed. You stayed during the whole mess his life used to be, or is.

You were the only person the felt comfortable with to truly open up to.

“Y/n... please. Don’t leave. Don’t leave me.” He whispers and stands up, still keeping his distance from you.

“DO YOU FEEL LIKE I WANT TO STAY WITH YOU NOW?” You scream, all your emotions crushing down on you all at once.

“No - no... just - it’s late, just stay here and I leave... I’ll stay away for how long I need to ... I don’t want anything to happen to you...” he looks at you with pleading eyes.

“HOW DO YOU THINK I CAN STAY HERE - IN YOUR HOUSE...where ... where everything reminds me of you...” you whisper the last part. Your hands grab the handle of the door, taking a deep breath you open it and look over your shoulder.

“Goodbye Gojo.”

“How long?” He whispers, his voice shakes.

“I - I don’t know.” You say and look at his eyes, tears running down on both of your faces.

Then you close the door and hurry out of the apartment complex.

On the other side of the door, Gojo collapse.

All of his muscles gave up working, he simply lays on the floor, not really able to breath, thanks to the knot in his throat.

He lost you.

He lost his best friend.

The person he saw himself still joking around when you are both old and your hair colors would finally match.

But he failed. He wanted to give you everything, make you happy, he would have done everything for you, not caring about his own feelings, he just wanted you to be happy.

You - the person he cares the most about.

But at the end, he hurt you and he lost you.

Lost you like he always looses everyone close to him.

With all the strength he has left, he takes out his phone and calls the only person he trust with all of this mess.

“Gojo. It’s 2am. And I just came back home.What do you want.” Nanami sighs.

“Please, find Y/n.” He whispers.

“What? Shouldn’t she be with you?”

“I- I told her...” his voice breaks.

“I’ll save the whole ‘ I’ve told you this would happen’ speech.” Nanami sighs. Why does he have to be involved in this mess.

“Nanami please, I don’t want anything to happen to her.”

“I’m on my way.” Nanami hangs up and puts on his shoes.

___

Why did you left him.

Yes what he did was wrong... but his intention wasn’t... you should not have been so hard to him. Not after all he had to go though... and after all he did for you.

He was okay with giving up his ‘hoe’ life just for your happiness.

Also... are you really okay with loosing your best friend?

You need him. And you know he needs you too. You two have always been there for each other, he trusts you and you trust him. You’re actually questing if you‘ve ever really loved him the way you felt you did. The feelings you felt for him and the ones you feel for Toji are … different. Maybe you never really loved before … and truth to be told, you longed for that feeling of someone loving you. Of someone holding you at night, kissing you, of not being alone when you make dinner… of not feeling unloved.

Maybe … your brain really just made you imagine those feelings for Gojo … yes you love him. And he loves you … but at this point … you realize that it’s the same way you love an family member… because that’s what he is for you… family.

Should you just walk back and talk things out with him.

Yes. Yes that would be the most mature thing to do.

But - no . You decided to be childish and let him suffer.

You don’t want to be the one who apologizes, yet you know that he will also not come and beg on for your forgiveness. Not because of his ego... but because he knows how much he hurt you and he doesn’t want to cause you more pain. So at the end you’ll have to go back to him.

Talking about going back... where are you going right now?

Looking around yourself, you groan.

No.

No .

NO.

Why the actual fuck did your feet walk you over to his.

But... but maybe it was meant to be?

Looking up you see light shining through his window.

Should you just... walk up... and knock in his door?

But what if she is still there, what if she opens the door, in one of his shirts, looking flawless, while you stand there, red puffy eyes, your make-up smudged... No. No you will not be that desperate.

Looking around you spot a bench and sit down.

Your eyes are fixed on the window and your mind starts creating scenarios again.

What is he doing right now? You really want to believe that he’s alone - nether the less your mind won’t let you.

In your head he’s laying in his bed. The women straddling him, running her hands up and down his tones body. Her lips leaving marks on his neck, his eyes are closed, yet the smug smirk is still visible on his face.

His hands grabbing her hips, grinding her against him, a deep growl escapes his lips, as she sits up, bouncing up and down on him- the sound of your phone gets your back to reality.

Without looking at the ID you answer your phone, hoping you’ll be able to hear Tojis deep voice.

“Y/n.”

“Nanami?” You blink a few times, not expecting him to call you at this time of the day.

“Where are you?”

“Home.” You lie.

“No you’re not. I’m at your home and you’re not there.” He sighs, “I know what happened. So where are you?”

“Did Gojo ask you to find me?” You roll your eyes.

“Yes. He’s worried about you.” He says in a calm voice.

“Wow isn’t he a wonderful person.” You roll your eyes.

“I am too. I just want to be sure you’re save.” He says sincerely.

“I am. I just need some time alone.” You sigh. The light in the window went off.

“... I don’t feel good with leaving you alone at night in this city.”

“I promise I’ll call you when I don’t feel save.” You smile.

“... I can’t convince you to let me pick you up?” He sighs again.

“No.”

“... well... just don’t go to inside.” He hangs up.

You look around confused and see the silhouette of a men walking away.

He knew exactly where you where.

Why are you not surprised.

Then you see something moving in the corner of your eyes.

There’s a person walking - more like storming out of the building.

The clicking of her heels echoes though the street.

Her long dark hair, flows in the wind, even now her hips sway perfectly even with her aggressive walking.

Was this the women from the bar?

Does this mean he’s alone now?

‘Don’t go inside.’ You repeat the words Nanami told you over and over - as you make your way towards the entrance.

From the distance Nanami watches you. He knew you wouldn’t listen. Looking up he shakes his head, again why is he involved in this. Or better - why did he let himself getting involved in all of this.

“Gojo.”

Another man steps out of the shadows.

“How long have you been here?” Nanami asks.

“I followed her.” He admits.

“And why did you call me up then?” He looks at him annoyed.

“In case she needed someone to talk …” Gojo stares at her figure entering the building.

“Do you think it will end well?” He looks at Nanami.

“Depends on how stubborn Fushiguro will be.”

“So I’ll better stay in case she ends up crying again.”

“You think she’ll want to see you then?” Nanami raises an eyebrow.

“No… but at least I can teach him a lesson for hurting her.” He says and his lips form a tight line.

“… I don’t think you’re in any position to judge.” Nanami shakes his head, “Go now. I’ll stay a bit longer.”

“But -“

“No. Go.” Gojo sighs and turns around.

“Gojo - I know you think you’ve lost her as your best friend … but I don’t think that’s the case. At least not for too long.” Gojo stops for a seconds, his eyes lightning up behind his glasses.

“I hope you’re right.” He says and leaves.

- some time before -

This doesn’t feel right.

His hips slam against her ass, one of his hands grab her waist, the other her hair.

Whenever she moans, he feels like throwing up.

Her voice sounds so wrong.

His hands release her body and grab her face from the back, shoving his fingers in her mouth, trying to muffle what ever she’s saying. Closing his eyes he tries to ignore who is fucking, one of his hands moves down and wraps around her throat. Pulling her towards him, her head falls over his shoulder, while he mercilessly continues fucking her. Some inhuman sounds leave her body, while Toji let’s all of his anger out on her.

He knows it’s not you, but with his eyes closed he can project all of the imagines of you, which he saved in his mind, on this girl and hopefully be able to reach his climax soon. Your beautiful face, the way your lips part whenever he touches you at this one spot, how beautiful his name sounds whenever you moan it…

“Omg Tojiii - I missed this so much.” She moans. Opening his eyes he grits his teeth.

“Shut the fuck up you stupid whore.” He says and the hand around her throat tightens.

He really tries to imagine it being you that’s being with him right now, but he can’t.

She doesn’t look like you, doesn’t sound like you, doesn’t feel like you - she’s simply isn’t you.

He let’s go of her face and throat and pulls out of her.

Trying to catch her breath she looks at him confused.

“Toji? Babe?”

Not even sparing her a glance he gets up and puts on some sweatpants.

“Not in the mood.” He huffs.

“Let me help you get into it thennnn.” She crawls over the bad and her hands reach to the hem of his sweatpants.

“No.” He steps back and grabs her clothes throwing them at her.

“Leave.”

“What?”

“I said leave.”

“But - but daddy we always had so much fun together …” she smirks and looks up at him.

“I said. Get. The fuck. Out. Of. My. Home.” He growls.

“Is it because of that slut?!” She angrily pulls on her dress, glaring at Toji who pulls out one of his cigarettes.

“Wow. Haven’t you told me at first that you’re just messing with her to annoy this guy with the white hair ?! And that I’m way better in bed than her?!” She huffs.

“I lied.” He says and blows the smoke in her face.

“Oh so some ugly fucking slut stole your he-“

Tojis grabs her face, squishing her cheeks inwards.

“I dare you, Max, call her a slut one more time.” His green eyes glow as he pushes her away, making her fall back on the bed.

“You bastard.” Max says and slips in her heals storming towards the door.

“Don’t call me again - like ever.”

“Never did - you were the one blowing up my phone ” He laughs as she slams the door.

Turning off the lights, he sighs and falls down on his sofa. His head rolls back and he stares at the ceiling.

He shouldn’t have left with her.

Deep down he knew that this would help him getting over you.

He looks at his phone.

Should he just call you?

No. You’re probably busy with Gojo right now.

His heart stings at the thought of it.

One of his hands massages his temples. He can’t stop thinking about you.

Oh how he wished that you were here with him right now.

In his arms, telling him about anything and everything.

Every second he spends with you seemed so easy and peaceful. He never felt that way since he lost Megumis mother.

A knock on the door interrupts him from fully embracing this depressed episode.

“I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE MAX!” He screams angrily.

“Toji… ?” A soft broken voice calls out his name and his eyes shoot open.

Taglist: @laceymorganwrites @ereeeeehhh @gojoscumslut @channieboii @alltimeluw ( I’ll tag you since you binged the first chapters) I hope it’s okay 🥺👉🏼👈🏼 ) : @cocotaku420 , @angelofthorr , @sukunas-cult-leader

#jjk oneshots #jjk x you #jjk x reader #gojo x you #gojo headcanons #jjk headcanons #jjk hcs #gojo x reader #gojo hcs #toji x you #toji imagine #toji x reader #toji hcs #jjk angst

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dnarez · 4 years ago

Text

Chapter 9 - My son, My mom

[Kind of rushed, sorry for the fast pass]

After taking the train to Fukuoka, Keigo's home city, you went to the adress that was on the official Hawks's Agency site.

You decided to walk, the weather was nice, but it could use a little wind, so you pointed your finger to the sky and made a loop like drawn with it, wind started to blow lightly, but because of how sudden it was some skirts went up, and you saw a newspaper hit a men in the face.

The path was very calm after that, but on the contrary of the outside, you were panicking on the inside, heart throbbing with anxiety, but you didn't allowed your feet to stop moving.

'What if he doesn't recognize me? No... I know that I have a little more breast, and may have some grey hair but-! It's Keigo! I want to see him! He's probably busy... what will I tell them to let me in?... oh! I can use my commission ID!!!'

You finally were getting there! The building was clear as day to you, you walked a little faster but calmed yourself down before going next to the receptionist.

"Hello, I came to see Hawks" you said with the typical 'business' voice

"Sorry hun, you can't, no fans allowed" she said not looking up.

"He's expecting me" you crossed your arms.

She looked at you up and down "That's kinda hard to belive Miss, since his schedule that I take care of doesn't have anything about MILFs"

You glared at her and showed your ID "Maybe there is something for the hero commission"

The girl paled at the card "Yes ma'am, I will tell him right now" she took the phone and called him... "Yes I know but-... It's the commission sir... she didn't- okay... yes sir" she hangs up the phone "last floor big wood door, there's no way you can miss it"

You nod to her and hold yourself back from running to the elevator, when you get there and see yourself on the mirror you frown.

Your face is starting to have marks, the scar on your chest is hidden behind your shirt, but the ghost feeling of the knife going through skin and breaking your chest bones was terrifying to remember, so you closed your eyes and focused on your breathing.

But closing your eyes made part of it worst, the flashbacks of those nights that you had to sell your body for information.

The "ding" from the elevator brought you back to today, taking a deep relived breath you get out of the elevator and go to his office door.

You knock three times, the business like knock made you cringe, but it's the way you alway knock.

"Come in" you heard his voice, and just that made you smile.

The pictures of him were everywhere on the internet, he was a very handsome man, extremely smart, kind, loving, and nothing of it was thanks to you... because you went away.

You closed the door behind you and saw that he's doing paperwork, a lot of it, the piles were even on the floor, but he had no feather on his wings "You are two hours early, this better be important, I am the number two pro hero after all" he didn't looked up from his papers, just kept writing.

Even if you saw a dozen of pictures trying to get familiar with his face, you just couldn't be prepared enough for this.

That small child that loved to laugh with you, that ate your food with a big smile, that had nightmares and would run to you, your son... was a grown up, and you weren't able to watch any of this.

His birthdays, fights with instructors, his teenager phase, his first crush, first love, first kiss, him being an ass to the higher ups and you would have to buy ice cream for him later... all those especial moments were lost, away from you.

Keigo heard sobbing an someone started to cry, when he looked up he was in total shock. "Mom?" His voice was barely over a wisper

"Keigo I'm so sorry!" You fell on your knees and bowed down.

(For those that don't know, this is the type of bowing that it's taken very seriously on Japan, as it represent that you are truthfully sorry, it's called Dogeza)

Hawks jumped from his chair and run to you "MOM GET UP!"

"I'm so-so sorry! I didn't have a option! The mission was so long! I there were moments that I though that I would never see you again! Must have feelt so alone, must have thought that I abandoned you! But I swear Keigo! Lil birb! My son!" You raise your head and look at him kneeled in front of you "I MISSED YOU SO MUCH! I'M SOR-"

Hawks hugged you tightly "Y-you came back!" You hug him just as tighly.

"I would never dream of leaving you alone, my boy" you sink your hand on his hair and scratch it, your other and pets his lower back "I'm so proud of you Keigo, you did such an amazing job all alone"

"I wasn't alone!" He break the hug and you see his face.

"I had you with me all this time! Your coat, a-and your diary! Your dairy had so many advice in it! I always felt like you were with me, but I missed you so much mom! Are you-" he takes a deep breath and you pet his hair "are you going to stay?"

You nod quickly "Of course! There is no better place in this world for me than by my son's side" you both hug each other.

"Mom!" He buried his face on her neck, hiccuping like the little boy he was to you.

"My baby birb, you did so well until now, you truly are awesome as fuck" you kiss his cheek and he sighs.

After all you were here holding each other's hand, he felt like a weight lift from his shoulders.

"Let's go to your house, I can prepare anything you would like" you separate the hug and get up.

He nods getting up too "I want that fried chicken you do! I never found a place that does it like yours!"

You both talk and clean each other's face.

This was true happiness...

................................ Important!

This is the ending... but not exactly, this is actually the end to this part of the history.

Now there's still something's going around, like when hawks fights dabi, Y/n will help Aizawa with classes, Y/n had a close relationship with AFO on her mission.

But technically it ends here, the rest of this book will takes twice as long for me to do.

If you follow me on my tumblr and/or Ao3, you know that I wrote 7 works until now, to which I'm currently working on 3 constantly and 2 from time to time.

So I hope you all can keep reading my work.

#bnh #bnha x reader #mha #mha x reader #bnha #bnha hawks #mha x you #mha x y/n #bnha x y/n #keigo takami #takami keigo #caretaker #mom reader #mother #mother reader #fluff

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years ago

Text

"Not My Yacht" *Chapter 4*

Part 3

Part 5

Mwahahahahaha!

Okay so-- obviously, this story is taking place in an alternate universe. Clearly. I need you all to follow me along on this journey, suspend your disbelief, yeah? I did my best at a backstory, I went over it for a long time. I'm pretty sure every detail is covered. If not, I apologize, let me know and I'll fix it.

I think this is gonna be one hell of a ride, people. I'm super excited, are you?!

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

(should I keep tagging @storiesofsvu ? I'm gonna do it until she says for the love of god STOP. 😂)

--------------------------

There was a very long, awkward pause before Rafael finally spoke:

“....What did you just say?”

“Please don’t make me repeat it,” You bit your lip as you looked at him with very sad, still very frightened eyes.

“I...I don’t…how...why...HOW is this man your husband?!”

“I...Well, he--” You muttered.

“He’s a PSYCHOPATH, Y/N!”

“Well he wasn’t when I met him!” You screamed unintentionally. You hadn’t meant to be that aggressive, but your instincts kicked in whenever a man yelled at you now.

“...I mean, I guess he was but you just said it yourself: He’s smart. He’s slick. He was sweet and charming and handsome, and I just-- we just-- “

“He seduced you,"

"I fell in love with him, Rafael! Jesus, it wasn't a one night stand. We were in love," You took a shaky breath. "Look I was a young, naïve, impressionable broke college student, okay? And he-- he was kind, and generous, and--”

“I don’t, I can’t have this conversation with you,” He started to walk into his secret room to get your clothes so that you could leave.

“No, please Rafael,” You grabbed his arm. “Please, let me explain? Please,” You pleaded with him.

“....Fine,” He sighed, unable to ignore your whimpers and tears.

“He wooed me, he gave me everything and anything I asked for. He lived in this giant loft uptown, I thought he was amazing. Looking back on it now, the loft was probably owned by people that he murdered and he’d kill people to get things I wanted, but I didn’t know that at the time!” You paced the floor while thinking out loud.

“And then when he asked me to marry him, I was ecstatic! I thought it was going to be my fairy tale ending before I was even 25, I didn’t know--” You suddenly stopped pacing and stopped talking, the memories of that period in your life coming back to you in disturbing waves.

Rafael saw how much you were in distress telling your story. Even though he was disgusted that you were ever intimate with this lunatic, he couldn’t help but feel for you. He stood up and took your hand, leading you to the leather couch in the corner of the room. He sat you down and motioned for you to continue if you could, while still holding your hand.

“I didn’t know that he was just trying to get me to be-- ‘his’, so that he could do whatever he wanted to me,” You barely got the words out while you still burned holes into the carpet with your eyes.

“Oh God, Oh-- Y/N,” He took your other hand but didn’t force you to look up; he wanted you to tell the rest on your own time.

“After we got married he started hitting me for stupid stuff like putting the dishes in the dishwasher wrong, or folding the towels the wrong way. And then he’d--” You felt tears catch in your throat. “He’d make me have sex with him whenever he wanted,”

“Carino,” Rafael instinctively put his arms around your shoulders, pulling you closer towards him. He just wanted to comfort you, he didn’t want to think about what else that monster did to you.

“I--- I didn’t know what to do. I had just graduated, he was paying for my law school, he was paying for everything I had in my life. I felt like I was trapped, so I just-- I put up with it,” You tried not to cry, you swore a long time ago you wouldn’t waste any more tears on him. But right now you couldn’t help it.

“But then it started getting worse,” You finally raised your head to look at him. “He started beating me when he was angry over other things, sometimes within an inch of my life,”

Rafael didn’t know what to say, he knew you weren’t finished so he just kept rubbing the back of your palms with his thumb comfortingly.

“I finally knew either I had to leave, or die,” You got your tears under control as you remembered how strong you had to be back then. And ever since. “So one day when he was on one of his ‘business trips’-- which now I know were probably killings or heists or worse, I packed everything I could fit into two suitcases and I just-- I left,” You sighed.

“I didn’t have anywhere to go. My parents live in Florida, I didn’t really have friends at school, which wouldn’t have mattered anyway because without him paying for it I had to drop out. I slept on the streets for months!” You unconsciously moved closer into Rafael’s chest as you relived the horror.

“Finally I-- I did something that I never thought I would do in a million years, but I was desperate Rafael. You have to understand that,” You looked at him with a terrified look, like he was about to kick you out of his office for real after what you were about to say.

“I do,” He put a hand to your face. “Whatever you’re going to say, I understand,”

“Okay,” You nodded softly. “I...I became an escort,” You turned away from him and his soft hand on your cheek. Even though he just assured you he understood, you could feel the judgement.

“Not a hooker,” You quickly added, like that made it any better. “An escort-- for older, wealthy gentlemen callers,”

��Ah,” He nodded. “I see,”

“...I changed my name, cancelled all my credit cards and got new ones in my new name. And I started making pretty good money. Enough for a small apartment and food anyway,” You continued. “I had accepted the fact that my life was going to be just what it was at that time-- living my life out as a whore,”

“You’re not, and never were and never will be, a whore Y/N,”

“Rafael, please,” You shook your head with a sarcastic laugh. “Maybe I was a fancy whore, but still one nonetheless,”

“No you--” He didn’t want to get into female derogatory slurs with you right now, so he just let it go. “...Okay, continue,”

“So then I just-- got lucky,” You played with the buttons on his shirt once again nervously. “I shouldn’t say lucky, that’s awful to say about a person’s death,”

“...Death?”

“Yeah um,” You picked harder at the buttons. “A regular of mine, Bartholomew Ridgewood. He was a very wealthy stockbroker who had no family or friends, just-- me, apparently,” You shrugged. “He had a heart attack and died, and then his estate contacted me to let me know that he had left his entire fortune and penthouse to me,”

“Seriously?” Rafael almost laughed at the crazy notion.

“I know right?!” You suddenly exclaimed. It really sounded like something out of a soap opera. “So, I used the money to immediately enroll back in law school, and got a job with Rita, and-- here I am,” You motioned towards yourself, in a ‘ta da’ fashion.

“So, let me get this straight,” Rafael began going over detail of your story in his head. “You actually have a huge fortune, but you’re still going to law school, AND holding down a job?”

“...Yeah,” You pushed a strand of hair behind your ear.

“Why?” He narrowed his eyes.

“Why?” You half laughed. “Well for one, because I don’t ever want to have to depend on a man’s wealth to survive ever again,”

“How would that even happen? Did you blow through it that fast?”

“No!” You suddenly stood up in anger, not believing he was questioning you now. “But it still scares me that something will happen to it, and I’ll be helpless again,” You crossed your arms. “And two, I want to help people like me, without a voice. And three, a recommendation from the District Attorney to any law firm is a very highly coveted accomplishment, Rafael,”

“Right,” He nodded. “So much more coveted than a lowly DA’s recommendation,”

“Are you-- Are you serious?” You laughed in disbelief. “Wha--How, HOW did you get to that from any point in my horror story?”

“I don’t-- I don’t know, maybe if I had known you sooner I could have protected you,” He rubbed the back of his neck. Why DID he say that? Why was he suddenly jealous that you had consciously chosen to work for Rita over him? Why did that even matter at this point?

“No, you couldn’t have,” You shook your head as you sat back down next to him. “I got away from-- By the way he went by Tommy Richmond back then, if you want to add that to your case file,” You pointed to the folder on the desk.

He stood up and walked over to it, pulling papers out of the folder and examining each identity he had found so far. Tommy was on the list from a few years ago. Eric Braverman was next on the list, then Eddie Warshack and then Billy Forsythe, before William Lewis. Eric’s ID was from Connecticut, Eddie from Pennsylvania, and Billy from Ohio.

“....So this shows that once he left New York he went south, but then came back up? That doesn’t make any sense,” He flipped through the papers as thoughts ran through his brain.

“Doesn’t it though?” You stood up and walked over to the desk. “He came back for me. He’s probably looking for me. Maybe he thought I fled the state and he went looking and came back,” Your face turned paler the more you thought out loud.

“I have to get out of here,” You suddenly decided out loud. You briskly walked to the secret room and pulled your clothes out with one minute left on the dryer, but you didn’t care. You were quickly putting them on when Rafael ran in after you.

“What? No, no you don’t,” He tried to stop you from unbuttoning his shirt. “Not now that I know he’s looking for you, you’re not going anywhere,”

“Look Rafael,” You stopped undressing and looked at him very seriously. “He’s smart, and he’s fast. I’ll bet you right now that he is doing some very specific research on anyone that was in that station the day you picked him up. And that includes you,”

“And why would he waste time on that if he’s looking for you?” Rafael raised a curious eyebrow.

“Well obviously if he thinks he’s at risk of being caught I’m the furthest thing from his mind right now! And he’ll study you all like lab rats, trying to figure out your fears and weaknesses, and prey on them. That’s exactly how he manipulated me,”

“So he researched you?”

“No, I don’t think he needed to back then! I just fell into his arms, no hard work on his end required,” You scoffed at your naivete as a young girl.

“....So why do you need to leave?” He crossed his arms.

“Because he’ll figure out we’re....involved,” You gestured between the two of you.

“Involved?” He half laughed. “Y/N we haven’t even-- we haven’t done anything but talk!”

“And yet I’m standing here in your office in only my underwear and your shirt like you said, a sex fantasy!” You gestured to your still scantily clad body.

That gave Rafael an idea.

Without warning his arms were suddenly around your waist, pulling you roughly into his awaiting mouth. You were shocked at first, but soon welcomed his tongue into yours as it began exploring your mouth. His hands slowly moved up your waist through his shirt, approaching your bare breasts. Before he could reach them, you pushed him away.

“What the FUCK are you doing?!” You yelled angrily. “Do you really think now is the appropriate time to do this?”

“Well, if Lewis thinks we’re ‘fraternizing’, shouldn’t we actually ‘fraternize’?” He gave you a smirk.

“He doesn’t think anything yet! I have no idea where he is, you have no idea where he is,” You sighed in frustration.

“I do know where he is,” He traced your palms with his finger sensually. “He’s locked in the tank at the station,”

“...Really?” You were suddenly feeling much safer, and arousal quickly came along with it.

“Really,” He nodded, cupping your head in his hands by your jawline so his thumbs ran against the side of your temples. He gently massaged them, making you relax even more.

“...And you’re not just trying to have sex with me so I won’t run off on you?” You did your best to keep your wits about you, but it was growing increasingly difficult with the smell of his cologne wafting from his hands into your nose. It was intoxicating.

“Maybe I am,” He chuckled, “Or maybe, I’m just acting on things I know we’ve both felt since yesterday on that boat,”

“That’s assuming a lot, counselor,” You bit your lip as you tried desperately not to look down at his mouth while he moved his face closer.

“Is it, though?” His smirk grew more devilish as he continued to close the gap between your lips.

“I…” You tried thinking of anything but his tongue inside you, but it was a losing battle. “....Screw it,”

You grabbed his head and thrusted it against your burning lips as your tongues once again began to do a tango in between your mouths. His hands moved upwards quicker this time, and this time you let them. You jumped onto him, wrapping your legs around his waist as he fell against the desk to support your weight. He picked you up and carried you to the leather couch, laying you down and crawling on top of you while never removing his mouth from yours.

You were both so happy and so enthralled with each other you didn’t notice the door was cracked open, and two dark eyes peering behind it.

#rafael barba #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #raul esparza #not my yacht

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honeypirate · 4 years ago

Text

Usual Place

Kyotani x reader college AU

Kyotani’s anger seemed to roll off of him in waves.

Everyone who saw him avoided eye contact and gave him space in the hallway.

But you, you stood in the middle of his path with a smile on your lips as he got closer. You had missed him while you were in class and he was at practice. You wanted to hug him and kiss him but he seems angrier than usual.

“Hi” you say with a soft smile and he grunts at you, hoping you just move out of the way. He wasn’t interested in your cute antics after the day he’s had.

Your smile falters and he scowls at the reaction his heart has. Dropping to his stomach because he made you sad or scared with his reaction was the last thing he wanted but he couldnt force himself to be nice right now. He didn’t want you to make him feel better.

“I heard that you had a hard time at practice. I just wanted to give you this” you place a small box against his palm and then move away “I’ll see you later. I hope you feel better” you avoided his eye, thinking if you made eye contact with him you might cry. Not because you were scared of him or he did anything scary wrong, you’re just overwhelmed with not being able to help him and the fact that he doesn’t seem to want you around. Those are the feelings that hurt and have no where to go.

You move around him with your head down and his hand tightens around the small box, his other hand itching to reach out and stop you, but he doesn’t. He sighs when he can no longer hears your footsteps retreating, and then continues his walk the other directions.

He opens the box when he gets back to his dorm and feels his heart ache at what he finds. A handwritten note about how proud of him you are and a chain he once mentioned wanting.

He slips the chain over his neck and reads yours letter, the anger in his head and heart dissipates with your words the more his eyes scan them. He’s not sure when he truly calmed down, but when he looked out his window it was dark and he new he had to talk to you.

Your phone ringing makes you jump and then shake your head at your reaction before picking up and answering when you see his name.

“Hey what’s up? Are you alright?” You ask and he hums softly and you can hear the change in him

“I’m okay. I wanted to thank you for the chain. That was really kind of you”

You feel your heart race “you’re welcome. I was gonna save it but I couldn’t wait”

he hums in response. “Are you busy?” He asks and you know what he’s gonna suggest.

“no. Usual place?” You ask as you close your notebook and look around as you find your shoes

“yes. I’ll be there in ten minutes” he says and you feel a calm settle in your soul from worrying about him since you heard about his struggle of a day from gossipers at this university. “See you soon Kyo”

You pull the hood of your hoodie up and over your head as you walk through the cool night air. Your shoes making the only noise as your toes hit the concrete as you walk down the sidewalk.

You can’t help but smile when you see him sitting on the bench under the streetlight. He looked like a thug who anyone normal would cross the street to avoid, but it warmed your heart to see how his face isn’t showing his normal scowl.

You sit beside him and he leans his head onto your shoulder “I’m sorry” he whispers and you sigh softly, turning and kissing the top of his head “are you feeling better?” You ask and he nods against you.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You ask and he shakes his head and you place your hand against his knee. “Okay. I’m here whenever you’re ready. And maybe next time you’re mad..” you say with a smile in your voice and move your arm around his back “you can still be nice to me” he sighs into you and turns his face away, his forehead in your shoulder.

“I’ll... make an effort” he grumbles out and you laugh. He doesn’t know what he did to deserve you but he truly means it that he’ll make an effort. He’ll work hard and show you that you mean more to him than everyone else.

You wrap your other arm around his middle and hug him tight “I really miss you when you’re brooding” You say and feel his body shake as he laughs softly “I miss you too” he whispers, his voice desperately honest.

You rub his back in small circles as you feel some of his tension drain

“How about we stop by the convenience store and get a slushy?” You suggest and he leans back, giving you a small smile, leaning down and brushing his lips on the top of your nose

“Sounds perfect” he responds and you notice his voice sounds calm but tired, one of your favorite Kyo moods.

When you handed him a box of fried chicken from the store deli, just a few hours old and still warm from the heat lamp, he realized just how well you know him.

“Im sorry” he says again as you sit on the curb outside the store, sharing the chicken and slushes. “You already said that silly” you say and bump into his shoulder as you take a sip from the straw.

You looked up at him in the glow of the neon lights, the straw in your lips and your tired eyes and messy hair from your hood that got pushed down, he thought you looked adorable.

“I’m sorry for making you scared” he said and you saw in his eyes how genuine and how bad he felt.

you set down your drink beside you and cupped his cheeks making him meet your eye “No. I wasnt scared. You don’t scare me at all. I never feel like you’ll hurt me. I was just so sad that you didn’t want me around. I’ve been around you mad before I didn’t know why I made you angrier and I didn’t want to make the situation worse”

His hands cover yours on his cheeks, his warm palms against the back of your hand “id never hurt you” he says sternly and then his eyes soften again “you always make me better. But I was so mad and I didn’t want to feel better. Until I was alone and I realized how much you help me. I’m sorry. I just- I didn’t- I don’t” you place your fingers against his lips and smile softly up at him

“Kentaro Kyotani” you say obviously impressed “this is the most I’ve ever heard you explain and apologize” his cheeks heat up but he doesn’t move from your touch “you are a man of actions and not words but this is a big action for you. Of course I forgive you. I forgave you almost immediately. I just want you to be happy. I want to make you happy” you kiss the tip of his nose and he blushes deeper

“I love you” he whispers and your heart flutters, a small gasp leaving your lips as you meet his worried gaze “I love you too” you whisper and watch his eyes go from worried to relived before he brushes his lips across your softly.

Even though he’s not an optimist he feels increasingly more hopeful and confident just by being around you. Like you’re the sunshine warming his cold shoulders. You’re a good influence on him and he wants nothing more than to keep you around as long as he can.

This, this, felt so much better than brooding or being mad and sad and alone. You chase away his darkness and he will spend his days proving to you just how much he appreciates and loves you.

You brush your lips against his for a moment “I’m so proud of you. Thank you for talking with me” he kisses you again, his lips a little cold from his slush, and says “thank you. Do you have anything you need to talk about?”

You shake your head “I’m doing good today actually. But thank you for checking in” you bury your face into his chest and he kisses the top of your head “want any more of this chicken?” He asks and you laugh “it’s all yours bub” you say and turn your head so you could grab your slushy again. Drinking it and pressing sticky icy kisses to his neck.

#kyotani #kyotani x reader #kyotani x you #kyotani imagine #kyotani fanfiction #kyotani Drabble #haikyuu drabble

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honeyheartsandkisses · 4 years ago

Text

A million times yes

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

One Shot!

Summary: You and Fred have always been really close. After a bad day, he tries to cheer you up and you accidentally confess. (You are in the same year as the weasley twins, one year above the golden trio.)

Warnings: Kissing, and maybe even a little grinding but no smut.

Word count: 2.6k

Sitting here in your potions lesson, you couldn't help but let your mind wander off. Professor Snape's voice droning on in the backgroun about the different kinds of spider venom and what they can be used for. The mildly pleasant smell of bubbling potions and the dim candles illuminating the dungeon all melded together, casting a drowsy spell on you.

"Miss y/l/n!" Snape's nasally voice pierced through your lazy state. You jumped to sit up straight, finding Professor Snape standing right in front of your desk. His face twisted into a nasty scowl.

He starts circling your desk like a vulture circling it's prey. You knew you were in deep trouble. "I suppose you find all this information boring Miss y/l/n?"

"No sir." You said. Staring down at the opened textbook on your desk. Snape always had a thing for torturing gryffindors.

"Humor me this, can you tell me the ingredients for a forgetfulness potion?"

"Umm... no sir."

"Not so smart now are we?" Snape grins, his long crooked nose twisting to make him look truly frightening. "Tell me the ingredients for a truth potion then."

You look up from your desk, and make eye contact with your best friends Fred and George Weasley. The red-haired twins who were seated just a table in front of you had turned around (just like the rest of the class) helplessly watching Snape humiliate you. A few slytherins were snickering, completely enjoying the show.

Feeling defiant, you wink at your two best friends before looking up to face Professor Snape. "With all due respect sir, you never taught us those two potions. How am I supposed to know what's in it?"

Your two best friends start cackling with laughter, clearly impressed by your sudden burst of confidence. A few gryffindors flashed you thumbs up signs, stifling their laughter.

"SILENCE!" Snape stops circling you and look down at you, administering a death-like glare. It instantly made you regret your decision from just five seconds ago. "Miss y/l/n. Very brave for an orphan." The word orphan struck a nerve. Your parents were muggles and at the age of 11, they passed away in a car crash. You were the only one who survived that night. Everytime someone brought it up you would relive it. The heavy snow, the thick ice, the feeling of the car skidding on the ice, and worst of all, your mother's screams.

"Perhaps they never got the chance to teach you classroom manners?" Snape continues in his low nasally voice. Your blood boiled. How dare he bring up your painful past.

"They must be disappointed to learn that their very own daughter turned out to be a failure." This makes your hands clench into tight fists.

You slam the table, standing up from your seat. "I am NOT a failure."

Professor Snape looked almost slightly surprised at your outburst. But within a second he restores his emotionless front. "Six hours of detention Miss y/l/n. Tonight. You will polish all the trophies in the trophy room, without the help of your wand. Be there immediately after dinner or it'll be eight hours. Do you understand?"

Still trembling with rage, you sit back down. "Yes Professor."

The moment Snape goes back to teaching, George quickly slips you a note. You felt slightly better knowing that your friends had your back. Holding the small piece of parchment under the table, you unfold it to see two familiar handwritings.

One of the handwritings had more rounded letters. You easily identified it to be George's.

It wrote: Wow six hours is going to be tough. I'm sorry he said those thing to you but i loved that you stood up for yourself.

The other handwriting was slightly crooked, and this belonged to Fred.

It simply wrote: Are you alright?

Your heart skipped a beat. It definitely was not out of the norm for the boys to show concern but everything Fred said and did made you want to scream. Your heart did backflips whenever you saw him. The way his messy red hair always seemed to fall perfectly into place when he ran his fingers though it, the way he always had a pleasant woody scent on him from all his quidditch practices, everything made you fall in love with him.

You flip the small piece of parchment around and write on the other side and write: I’ll be okay. Before handing it back to the twins.

You manage to stay out of trouble the rest of the lesson, and when Snape finally dismisses everyone, you scoop your heavy textbook into your arms and the three of you head toward the great hall for dinner.

“Maybe we should leave an exploding chocolate bomb on his table.” George says, holding the classroom door open for you.

You laugh, walking through the door with Fred following closely behind you. “Don’t be silly George. Snape’ll figure it out right away.”

“Still worth a shot don’t you think?” Fred says, winking at you.

You quickly shake your head. “I mean it boys. Don’t. Do. It.”

“Alright alright fine.” George says, while Fred swiftly grabs your textbook from your arms, carrying it for you the rest of the way.

“Actually we know a trick or two when it comes to cleaning the trophy room.” Fred says, looking down at you. Him being a whole head taller than you, he towered over you. It made you feel safe. “You could always bewitch a few sponges to self-clean. Sneak them in under your cloak.”

“Snape said no wands but he didn't say you couldn't do with a little... lets call it special equipment.” George adds.

You decide to take their advice, and before reporting to the trophy room after dinner, the three of you stop by a supply closet to bewitch a few sponges before they walked you to the trophy room where Snape was already waiting.

Professor Snape eyes you suspiciously before scowling. “Your little friends cannot stay with you y/l/n.”

Slightly annoyed, you snapped back. “Yes I'm well aware. They were just leaving.” The twins each give you a small pat on the back before hurrying off, leaving you with Snape.

“You will polish and shine all the trophies in this room.” Snape says in his nasally voice that always left you nauseous. Only when he steps aside do you see how massive the room was. With shelves extending from the ground up to the ceiling, each one of them crowded with trophies of all shapes and sizes. Some looked like regular muggle trophies but some seemed to be able to move. Some had faces on them whereas others were shaped like mystical animals.

“Maybe this will teach you not to disrespect a teacher.” Snape says, the corner of his lips turned upwards, clearly delighted to see you in misery. “I will be back every hour or so to check on you. If you’re not here, it’s another two hours of detention and fifty points from Gryffindor. Your wand will be confiscated until all these trophies are polished.” You reluctantly hand over your wand, wishing you could hex the professor. “Get started.” With that, he turns around and walks off, shoes clicking down the dimly lit corridor.

Cursing under your breath, you retrieved your earlier bewitched sponges from the supply closet, along with a couple other polishing solutions. To your surprise, they worked brilliantly. The small sponges scrubbed every inch of each trophy leaving it spic and span, before automatically moving on the next. While the sponges were busy at work, you headed over to a corner of the room and sat down. Just when you were about to doze off, a familiar voice jolted you awake.

“Tired already? It hasn't even been an hour.”

You look up to face it’s owner, coming face to face with Fred Weasley. Your heart swelled. Quickly rubbing the seep from your eyes, you laugh and pat the ground next to you, asking him to sit and he complies.

“What are you doing here?” “Wanted to say hi to Professor Snape.” Fred says, gleaming mischievously at you. Under the dim light, his brown eyes looked like honey and the smell of his freshly shampooed hair gave you the urge to pull him into a hug.

You roll your eyes. “Ha-ha. Very funny Weasley.”

“Are you really alright?” He suddenly says, catching you off guard.

You smile, hugging your knees. “Yeah I told you I’ll be fine.”

“But you’re not...” He looks down at you, almost like he could see right through you. “When Snape mentioned your parents earlier, you looked so incredibly sad. Like nothing could ever make you happy again.”

“I know...” you let out a big sigh. “Everytime someone mentions my parents I re-live that night. Id be lying if I said it wasn't terrifying. But this is something I have to deal with on my own. It’s not anyone’s job to fix me.” Before you know it, a tear escapes the rim of your eye, rolling down your cheek.

Fred puts an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. “I understand. I just wanted you to know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. So don’t be afraid to let me know if you’re struggling.”

You snuggle closer to his chest, his arm still tightly wrapped around you. Feeling a warmness wash over you, your mood changed for the better. You tilt your head upwards, looking at him. He senses your movement and looked down at you with concern. Your face merely inches away from his, you fought the urge to kiss him. His eyes travel down your face, staring at your lips before looking into your eyes again. “Y/n I...” But before he could say anything else, you press a kiss to his lips, quickly pulling back to observe his reaction. He looked confused and flustered, making your heart sink. You just made a huge mistake.

“I'm sorry I didn't mean to... I just...” You stumbled over your words trying to find the right thing to say. You felt embarrassed and humiliated. Did you just singlehandedly ruin your friendship with the Weasley twins?

But all of a sudden, Fred stops you from freaking out. “Shut up.” He sounded urgent and needy. He crashed his lips with yours, and you could feel his passion and urgency. Like he needed this for a long time. Like he never wanted to stop kissing you. His hands cup your face, deepening the kiss, while you move to sit on his lap. A growing heat in your lower belly started to take over and you rocked your hips forward, grinding on him. He snakes one arm around your waist, pulling you closer while you kiss his neck.

Suddenly, you hear the sound of shoes clicking against the hollow corridor and you pull away from Fred in a hurry. “It’s Snape!” you whisper urgently. “You need to go now! He’ll punish you!”

“But-” Fred tried to protest, but you move off of him, quickly standing up.

“Please Fred I wouldn't want you getting into trouble because of me. You need to hurry!”

He gives you a reluctant pout, but finally agrees. “I’ll see you later.” He kisses your forehead before hurrying off.

Shortly, Snape arrives to see you hard at work polishing the trophies. He mumbles something about you having a bad attitude before leaving, and once again you’re left alone.

You sit back down in the corner, going over the past few minutes. Fred Weasley kissed you. The boy you’ve had a crush on since your second year in Hogwarts. He liked you. Being held by him was the most amazing feeling in the world. Kissing him made your head spin.

Time flew by and before you know it, Your six hours of detention had passed. It was now 1am and the bewitched sponges had obediently dropped to the ground lifelessly after polishing the last trophy. As if on cue, Snape returns, walking up and down the trophy cases.

“Very well y/l/n. You may leave.” He hands you your wand.

“Thank you Professor. Always a pleasure.” You say sarcastically, bolting out the door before he could lecture you again. When you made it up to the common room, you expected it to be completely empty. After all, it was 1am. But to your surprise, Fred was fast asleep on the sofa in front of the fire, his chest rising and falling in sync with his breathing. He had waited for you to come back. You couldn't help but giggle. Grabbing a blanket from a nearby cupboard, you lay it over him and kiss his forehead.

Just as you were about to tip toe over to the stairs to make your way up to the girl’s dormitories, he stirs from his sleep.

“y/n? Is that you?”

You make your way back to him, sitting down on the sofa. “Hey, what are you doing here silly? Shouldn't you be in bed?”

He sits up, pulling the blanket off him. “I wanted to be here when you got back.”

“Well? I’m here now. Whats the matter?”

Without saying another word, a mischievous smile spreads across his face. Reaching under the sofa, he pulls out his quidditch broomstick. “Let me take you on a flight?”

Your eyes lit up. For years you've been begging the twins to let you use their broomstick. Theirs was always better than yours because you weren't on the quidditch team. But they guarded that thing with their life. Not once did they allow you near it.

“Really?” Fred stands, holding his broom in one hand with the other hand outstretched towards you. “Milady?”

You laugh, taking his hand. Just like that the two of you sneaked out of the Gryffindor common room, creeping past Mrs Norris and Filtch’s office. After a few long corridors and several flights of staircases, the two of you finally reach the main door. He pushes it open, and you step out into the cold night. It’s so dark, it could be impossible for anyone to see the two of you zooming around in the air.

“It’s a little chilly tonight. Here hold this.” Fred hands you his broom before taking off his coat and handing it to you. He takes the broom from you again and says “Put It on. Wouldn't want you catching a cold.” You pull it on, thanking the heavens that its dark out. This way he couldn't see how much you were blushing.

He straddles the broom before lowing the back end. “You ready?”

“Just one question.” You say, stepping closer to him so your bodies were slightly pressed together. “Why’d you bring me out here?”

“I wanted to cheer you up of course.” He says, pressing a soft kiss on your forehead. “Wait... is it alright I did that?”

“Well, that depends.” You lean over his shoulder and whisper in his ear. “Are you my friend or are you my boyfriend?”

“Boyfriend.” he blurts out immediately. “If that's what you want of course.” he adds, looking rather embarrassed at his quick answer.

You giggle at his adorable display. “Fred Weasley are you flustered? For the first time in your life?” “Shut it y/l/n.” he laughs, “Come on, you know you're gorgeous, and funny, and kind and you have a cute butt. Now tell me, will you or will you not be my girlfriend?” Despite the nonchalance of his tone, you could tell he was nervous. His eyes gave it away.

“A million times yes.” Putting your arms around his neck, you pull him in for a long kiss. It was head spinning and life changing. The two of you only pull away when there was not enough air left. You think I have a cute butt?” You ask, smirking at him.

He smiles, rolls eyes eyes and simply says “Hop on princess.”

You climb onto the back of his broomstick, wrapping your arms around his torso tightly before the two of you take off into the night.

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anotheronechicagobog · 4 years ago

Text

Rangers, Lead the Way

Written by: @anotheronechicagobog

Warnings: Swearing, canon compliant violence, I had to use a lot of material from the actual episode, mention of domestic abuse

tagging: @detectiveinchicago

A/N: So, this is a new series. Basically, OA Zidan (FBI), Jay Halstead (Chicago PD), and Kenny Crosby (FBI: Most Wanted) all went to Ranger training together and kept in touch, something that was useful when they couldn’t be the one to keep their ‘partner’ safe and need to call one of the others for assistance when their ‘paartners’ are temporarily working with another member of the trio.

OA wasn't a name that he'd heard in a long time. They weren't in the same unit but they were in Rangers training together. Jay was one of the only two people there who didn't have it out for him solely because of his religion, while he was shocked to find a Muslim among the ranks at first, he quickly got over it. Not only did he trust that his superiors wouldn't let a terrorist into the army at all, let alone Ranger training, but OA was a U.S. citizen, and had a very personal hatred for everyone who sullied the name of Islam and used it for violence and their own personal gain. So he and Kenny Crosby befriended OA despite the shock and ignorance from their brothers and sisters in arms. They studied together, trained together, ate together, and bunked together. When they'd all been given different assignments they made sure to stay in touch. And they continued to call, email, and text each other after they'd all been discharged.

When Hailey got temporarily assigned to New York Jay was... Well, it's hard to describe how he felt. It was such a nightmarish combination of devastated, terrified, and heartbroken. It was like an icy hand had enclosed around his throat and was slowly squeezing, painfully closing his throat, all while his heart was being dissected out of his chest by another. Not only was he reliving one of the most traumatic moments of his life all over again, but Hailey was going to be in the field without him. She was going to be in danger without him there to watch her back.

And since Hailey was amazing, she could tell just by looking at him that his mind was dropping down into a dark place faster than Alice tumbled into Wonderland. "It's just temporary. And I'll be okay, Jay."

"Hailey..."

"I'm going to put in my time and come back as quickly as possible. It's okay. It's all going to be okay." Hailey's words didn't reassure him in the slightest. How could they, when they didn't even reassure Hailey?

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Special Agent Zidan."

"Hey OA, it's Jay."

"Hey man, how are you?"

"Honestly, not great."

"What's wrong?"

"My- uh my partner..."

"Hailey Upton."

"Yeah. She's getting detailed out to the FBI for a bit. I found out that she's getting assigned to your unit."

"That makes sense, my partner's doing a UC detail right now, we'll probably be partnered together."

"OA... Watch out for her. Please. She is strong and more than capable of defending herself, and you quite frankly, but- she's my- I..."

"Don't worry, Jay. I'll have her back. She'll make it back to you."

"Thank you. Seriously, you have no idea how much this means to me."

OA looked at the now-empty desk that had been causing his heart to ache at the sight of it. His shoulder sagged at the pain that was pulling in his chest, the dark fog that filled his mind whenever he started to think, started to wonder, caused his head to throb. "Actually, I know exactly how you feel."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You will be partnered with Agent Zidan."

"Hi, I'm OA."

"Hi. Hailey."

"Nice to meet you."

"You too."

"Listen up, everyone. This is Detective Hailey Upton from Chicago PD. She will be with us for the next few weeks as part of our interagency training program."

"All right, so let's, uh, direct our attention to the screens here. Found the body of a young John Doe in St. Nicholas Park. A hundred yards from Alexander Hamilton's house. Federal land, federal case- and no, it is not where Aaron Burr shot him. The famed duel took place in-- anyone, anyone? Weehawken, New Jersey. Kristen knew. Unfortunately, there's far less clarity in the present homicide case. Evidence of torture and abuse, the victim was brown-skinned, but there was no other evidence of a hate crime. So let's dig in, get to work, start filling in the blanks. Yeah? Go."

"You ready?"

"Yeah."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So, Chicago PD? Should I be nervous?"

"Nervous?"

"You guys have been in the news a lot and not for good reasons."

"Uh, yeah, we've had some issues, but they're being addressed. It's a great place. I'm proud to be a part of it. The next time you want to insult me, just come out and say it, you don't need to disguise it as a compliment. This car right here?"

"Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean it like that. It's just my way of saying we do things differently here."

"Mhmm."

"Just trying to keep it real." And keep you from getting hurt so that Halstead doesn't develop a full head of grey hair. "So, you spend much time in New York?"

"Nah, first time here."

"Any early observations?"

"Pizza's too thin. It's like a cracker with sauce on it. Just trying to keep it real."... Okay, so maybe it would've been nice if Jay had warned him that she had an axe to grind, but he could make do.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"If I hear you're harassing any more immigrants, I'm gonna come back here, and I'm gonna break your arm. Do you understand?"

"Yeah."

"Good."

"I forwarded Kristen the pictures of Aman. She'll get us a street block number based on the license plates in the background."

"Just like that, huh?"

"The FBI, Upton. Our tech resources are pretty sick. Look, it's not a big deal, but now that you're working with us, just try and be a little bit more careful. If that guy Prichard calls the Bureau complaining that you threatened to use force..."

"Look, man, I don't need a lesson on how to talk to people, all right?"

"Hey, hey, hey. Don't get me wrong. I have no problem with someone breaking that idiot's arm, it's just... It's just that the Bureau is hardcore, and they take that stuff really seriously."

"You're right. I'm sorry. If he files a beef, I'll eat it and make sure you're clear. All right?"

"Appreciate that. But what the hell's a beef?"

"It's an expression."

"I'm kidding. Kristen said Aman's house is around this area."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, Hailey is a badass. That was pretty damn cool to witness. Sidenote; Jay is going to murder him.

Hailey was fine, more than fine, she actually saved his ass. But that didn't matter, Jay had trusted him to protect Hailey and hadn't failed, but he hadn't done the best job either.

They'd been searching a house, and after coming down the stairs he completely missed an assailant in the kitchen. But Hailey hadn't. No, she saw him and got him out of the line of fire. He provided cover fire while she jumped back over to the wall at the end of the stairs. OA tensed, more than usual when he was in a firefight unless Maggie was- nope, not going there, the point is, he didn't miss the way a bullet penetrated the wall a few centimetres from Hailey's head.

"Halstead."

"Don't be mad-"

"Oh god-"

"Hailey's fine. One-hundred percent fine, not even a scratch. We just, uh, we got into a shootout with an assailant. He got a shot off close to her head. She's fine- more than fine! I swear! She actually saved my ass in that altercation! And I was covering her the whole time!"

"... That's it? That's a pretty normal day for us, OA. She's okay, you're okay... So, everything, is... Okay. And seriously, thanks again, man. I can't even begin to tell you how much this means to me. I know that she can take care of herself and the others around her, but it's hard when I'm not the one there to have her six. So I really appreciate that I know and trust the person who is."

"Well, I'm glad that you're not gonna come at me like you did when I stole one of the cookies your mom made from your care package."

"Yeah, we wouldn't want a repeat of that."

"Plus, I know how it feels to... Not know. My partner is under right now and..."

"You're going out of your mind?"

"More than you can believe. I can't eat or sleep, and every time my phone buzzes I think it's a death notification instead of an emergency call from work."

"Sounds like you've got your own Hailey. You'll have to introduce me to Maggie one day."

"Yeah, I will. And Ken's definitely gonna have to introduce Hana. We have heard far too much about her to not even be able to put a face to the name."

"Tell me about it. Sometimes I regret our 'no search' rule, but then I remember how much we embarrass each other."

"By the way, thank you."

"Huh? For what?"

"For saving my ass back there. In the house."

"Oh. Okay. Cool. You're welcome."

"Halstead, how much do get shot at, exactly?"

"Why are you asking?"

"She pushed me out of the path of a bullet and when I thanked her afterwards she treated it like it was nothing."

"... I mean, there's not exactly a whole lot I can do about people trying to kill us..."

"Jay. Dude."

"I can try to stop being 'idiotically reckless' as Hailey calls it, but I'm not trying to be a hero or a dumbass or anything, it's just that... If it's not me getting hurt..."

"...It's her."

"Yeah."

"We're both whipped, aren't we?"

"Oh, ridiculously whipped. The desk Sergeant at my precinct is constantly making fun of me for it."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Just got ballistics back on the slugs fired at OA and Upton. They match the bullets that killed Aman, but get this; they also match the bullets pulled from a drive-by murder victim two months ago."

"Could they ID a suspect yet?"

"Yeah, arrested him too. Name is Santiago Gonzalez, known associate of the Latin Players. He's being held at MDC pending trial."

"Latin Players. That's a Chicago gang."

"Hmm, looks like they're expanding."

"So the Latin Players killed someone, they get arrested, go to jail, and the gun

stays on the street."

"And the new owner uses said gun to kill Aman, a studious Indian engineering student?"

"Right. What are we missing? How are these two murders connected?"

"Have OA and Upton pay a visit to Inmate Gonzalez. Maybe he can help us answer that question."

"Right."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So this guy, Gonzalez, is originally from Chicago. Runs with the Latin Players, so maybe you should take the lead on this one. But go hard on him." Hailey and Gonzales were from the same city, same blood, this was her turf, and OA wanted to make sure that he abided by that.

"You want a reaction?" Hailey seemed to get exactly what he meant, what he wanted, but she also seemed hesitant, like she needed more than clarification. It was like she needed permission.

"A big one. Big enough to force him to call his people."

"I think I can do that." And just like that, she had a smirk in her voice and was walking ahead of him. OA could see the wheels turning in her head and a coolness to her features let him know that she'd come up with a game plan. He didn't know if he should be afraid or not.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Where's the gun you used in the drive-by?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." They were less than a minute into the interrogation and he was already annoyed. Why did these guys always have to be so smug? He resisted the urge to roll his eyes, and just let Hailey do her thing, only popping in to keep the flow going. "One of your friends used it to kill a civilian last night."

"Used it again this afternoon on us. Fired off ten rounds."

"Like I said, I don't know what you're talking about." OA had to hold in a sigh.

"You're staring 20 to life on the case you're riding. Give us the name of the person you gave the gun to, and maybe I'll be able to get you a reduced sentence."

"Get my ass, blondie." OA quickly debated the pros and cons of stepping in. Honestly, this guy would probably just make him angrier with his smug attitude and sexist remarks, plus Hailey wasn't even phased. She was still in control, and she actually seemed a little... Bored.

"I'm not a fed like him. I'm Chicago police."

"So what?"

"Means I play by different rules. Also means I know the names of all the shot callers in the Latin Players. Tomorrow morning, we're gonna do a warrant sweep. Means a lot of people you know are gonna get arrested."

"That's not my problem."

"But it is. Because I'm gonna make sure that they know you are the snitch who gave them up."

"Now, you know nobody's gonna believe that."

"Really? Because in my experience, pissed-off bangers don't do their homework, and if they think you're a snitch, you're a snitch. In the street, rumours become facts like that."

"I'm done talking."

"Alright."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So you think he believed us?"

"I don't know. What?"

"Nothing, you just reminded me of my partner, Maggie, in there."

"Oh."

"In a good way."

"Then thank you."

"Can you cue up the audio feed?" The prison guard nodded back at OA and did as he asked.

"So where is your partner?"

"Uh, she is on an undercover assignment. That I know absolutely nothing about besides the fact that she is gone and unreachable."

"That's gotta be pretty tough."

"Yeah, but she's really good, so she'll be fine."

"We're up." The guard unmuted the computer and moved out of the way so that he and Hailey could see it clearly.

"Yo, just say the word, man. Chicago about to throw that heat."

"What are you talking about?"

Gonzalez sighed. "Police and FBI here sweating me, man."

"About what?"

"That piece that I left behind. I'm guess it's all connected to what happened on the night at Highbridge Park."

"All right, thanks for looking out."

"No doubt."

"Can you trace the number that he called?" OA was ansty, ready to get moving fast before their lead disappeared and from the honed in look in Hailey's eyes he could see she felt the same.

"Payphone up in Washington Heights." The prison guard was curt and efficient, exactly what they needed and OA was silently grateful.

"Okay. Thank you."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I'm guessing that's his girlfriend."

"Hold on. I talked to her at the park, right before we found Ernesto's body." From the way her body tensed OA could tell Hailey wasn't happy she'd let this girl slip through her fingers. He could tell her that it wasn't her fault, no one was even remotely aware of this connection, but he knew that was pointless. Any passionate law enforcement officer would beat themselves over something like this, himself included.

"Ah, and we have a hit off of social rec. Her name is Harper Quinlan, 23 years old, last known address is 84 Groton Street, Queens, New York."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Why were you at the park?" OA sat across from the young woman, dead set on getting all the information she knew. Arman's murder was quickly dissolving into a larger more horrifying crime and he was worried that the poor man who this had all started with would be forgotten and he didn't want to think about why that enraged him so much.

"I told you before. I was walking."

"Or was it to recover the glove that Lucas dropped after he killed his drug supplier?"

"I don't know anything about that."

"We have video of you in the driver's seat of Lucas' Range Rover at Highbridge Park the night that Lucas killed Ernesto Garcia, so you are now an official suspect in a murder investigation. That means no more lying, no more protecting your boyfriend. You either cooperate with us here and now, or you go to prison."

"I'm not gonna help you ruin Lucas' life. I just won't. He's a good person."

"Harper, good people don't sell drugs or kill people."

"Yeah, you don't know him like I do. He's so nice, and... he's sweet... He really loves me."

"Lucas isn't who you think he is, Harper. Protecting him will only get you and more innocent people hurt. Tell me why you think he was in the park that night."

"I'm not gonna help you."

"Are you listening to what I'm saying to you? You're a suspect in a murder investigation here. Lying to protect him makes this worse. You're putting more lives at risk. Be smart. Tell me why you were there that night. Harper, you don't need to go to prison for him." OA knew he wasn't getting anywhere and was trying to think of some other- any other method- to try and get Harper to talk, when Hailey burst into the room. She looked calculated, like she had a plan or idea that needed to be executed exactly or else the worst might befall those she was trying to protect. Which, if he read her character right, was everyone.

"Unlock it."

"What's going on?" Harper was just as confused as he was, but he knew better than to show it.

"Do it. Pull up your texts."

"Oh, my God."

"What does it say?" Hailey already knew, that much was obvious, but whatever was going on needed to be as brutally real as possible to Harper, and voicing it out loud would drive whatever was going on home for Harper.

"'Return the product, or he's dead. You have four hours. Tell your man to meet us at the place we did our first deal.' Oh, my- oh, my God." Harper's sobs quickly took up the space of the interrogation room, it didn't matter that she hadn't seen her father in so long, losing him would devastate her, and the Latin Players knew that well.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Let me take a run at her. I might have an angle to play." OA watched Hailey carefully, trying to make out was she was thinking, what angle she could possibly have, but he hadn't known her nearly long enough for any of that. There was this... Knowing glint in her eyes, and a sort of dark confidence had taken over her aura. She was confident in whatever plan she had, obviously, he just had no way of predicting what it was. In that moment, OA could really see what made Jay all twisted over her. She didn't look excited to break the accomplice of a drug dealer, or eager to impress the FBI. She looked like she was ready to get elbow deep in someone else's mess just for the sake of protecting as many people as possible with her quick wit and razor-sharp intelligence. So he just inclined his head and got ready to watch her work from the other side of the glass.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You're in a tough place right now, Harper. We have video of you at the scene of a murder, which makes you an accessory. You're looking at 15 to 20 years in prison. But if you cooperate, we can help you. We'll talk to the prosecutor, explain why you were there, help him understand the nature of your relationship with Lucas."

"What are you talking about?"

"I know what's going on. He hurts you, doesn't he?"

"No. That's not true. He's a good guy-"

"No, he's not. What are those bruises on your neck? You tried to cover them up, but I can see them. When you first met, I bet he was great. You guys hit it off, you had fun. He was everything you wanted. But then he started chipping away at your friends and your family. So you pop a pill to numb the pain and tell yourself everything's okay, just hoping that the abuse is gonna stop. Harper. It won't. I talked to your dad. He loves you very much. And he needs you right now. He's in a lot of danger. If these guys don't get their drugs back, they will kill him. The only thing that matters now is you helping us to find Lucas, so we can recover the drugs and find your dad." Watching Hailey in the interrogation room really was something else. From the slight waver of her tone, the palpable understanding in her voice that seemed to wrap a crying Harper in the first hug she's had in a long time, he could tell that she was exposing a pain-filled part of herself to this- this girl, this accomplice in drug dealing and murder. And still, she was able to remain professional and in control, and OA could honestly say that her incredible ability to do her job both made his heart ache for her and impressed him far more than he thought she would.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They were in the surveillance van, waiting for Harper and the SWAT team to get in to place. What OA was itching to ask her was highly personal. He did not expect her to feel comfortable talking to him about it, but she'd given Harper some of her strength and after revealing something so heart-wrenching, the protective Egyptian older brother in him needed to make sure that she'd left enough for herself. "So, how do you know so much about abuse? I am sorry, I did not mean anything by that."

"No, it's fine. It's all good. Everyone becomes a cop for a reason. I guess that's mine."

"Uh, yeah."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Don't forget, Harper. He wants the cash to get out of town, but we need the location where he first met his dealer. That's where your dad is." OA nodded along to Hailey's instruction, keeping a critical eye on the emotionally distraught Harper.

"Babe. They took my father."

"What are you talking about?"

"That guy that you deal with, they grabbed my father and texted me that they're gonna kill him unless we return the drugs that you took."

"Oh, no, no. I can't- I can't do that."

"They took my father!"

"Look, I feel bad, but they will kill me. Oh, Jesus, don't-"

"Lucas."

"Don't give me the sad eyes look."

"Lucas."

"I'm screwed. Look, I gotta look out for me- for us, you understand?"

"Look, I need to know where you and Ernesto did your first deal 'cause that's where they wanna meet."

"I just told you, I'm not going-"

"I will go! I'll call my uncle. He has a lot of money. Maybe I can negotiate a deal or something."

"I gotta get moving, all right, so give me the money."

"Where did you meet him?"

"Stay strong." Hailey could see her waver, could see her lose her ground and need someone to keep her steady. "Location first, then give him the money."

"Lucas. Lucas. Lucas!"

"I'll call you later on, all right?" Lucas, being the selfish douchebag that he is, grabs the bag of money and moves to book it, leaving his girlfriend who needs him behind.

"Damn it. Move in now!" OA sounded the call and immediately all agents left their posts and honed in on Lucas.

"Lucas!"

"You lying sack of..." Lucas, in an effort to prove that he really is a stellar guy, pulls out a gun and starts shooting at the agents, causing panic and fear in the civilians around them. Really, Harper? This guy?

"Get down! Get down!" Hailey pulled Harper out of the line of fire and pushed her to the ground before covering her with her own body, amazing OA with her selflessness yet again. You really picked a good one, Jay.

"Move, move!"

"Drop it!" Scola had joined them when Lucas went for the kill, forcing OA to do the same. Only OA was a good shot, though.

"Lucas! Lucas! Lucas! Lucas..." Harper couldn't stop calling for him, and OA was certain that the only reason she hadn't crawled over to his body was that Hailey was holding her in place. "It's okay." Hailey seemed to be stuck on repeat, comforting Harper. OA personally couldn't see how someone who had been abused would mourn their abuser... But then again, he thankfully had never had to suffer through that. Unlike Hailey.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Sounded like he was ready to hit the road, so I'm guessing his dope is close by. Nothing back here." OA went to the Range Rover with Scola to look for anything- finding the drugs would've been preferable, but as long as it was a tangible clue, they could call it a win.

"Yeah. There's nothing here either."

"Any luck?" Hailey approached them, her I-know-something-that-you-don't-but-don't-worry-I'll-tell-you plastered on her face.

"Nope. Nothing."

"You have the keys on you?"

"Yeah."

"Here, let me try something. Hop in. Shut the trunk." Hailey closed the driver's door, started the engine, pushed a button on the stereo and on the car door. A drawer illuminated by blue light opens, containing the missing drugs.

"I already pushed it. Nothing happened." Scola sounded mildly insulted, but OA just chuckled internally.

"Okay, Chicago." He was impressed, and he wasn't going to hide that. He was also going to give Jay a call later to tell him to ask her out already. There's no way a woman this amazing stays single for long.

"I have a CI who installs these things. Engine has to be on and doors closed in order for it to open."

"Okay, we got the dope. Now we just gotta figure out where to deliver it to."- OA

"Yep."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"We have Lucas' texts from the phone he was carrying since Harper said he started doing business with the Latin Players about a month ago-" Kristen was leading their group of field agents and Jubal towards the front desks, explaining what she found, and while normally they would have totally enjoyed her explaining just how smart she is, things were a little time-sensitive.

"Yeah."

"We need to scrub that time period."

"There, on the 28th. There's a text that says, 'Meetings at 2. Let's do 9 instead of 8.'" One of the analysts pulled the info onto the computer screen in front of them, showing them the text records.

"'Let's do 9 instead of 8'? But the meeting's at 2:00. Is that some sort of code?" Jubal's mind was whirring away with Kristen's, figuring out exactly what it meant.

"Well, here's Lucas' GPS data from that day around that time." Kristen worked her magic so that Jubal could work his.

"All right, so from 1:37 to 3:12, he was in Brooklyn down by the river. Kris, can you zoom in? Get a more specific look at this. Yeah, over here. Can you drill down right there?"

"Okay."

"They met at 2:00 at a dock. Pier nine instead of pier eight. That's the meeting place." Scola voiced it out loud, like he was still in thought and hadn't had time to put all of the pieces in place internally first.

"There it is." Jubal's prideful voice made OA smirk.

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"We've got 67 minutes to get the drugs down to pier nine. Unfortunately, the guy we need to deliver the drugs is at the city morgue." Isobel voiced the dreadful obvious from her office, forcing them all to sigh and start their plan to catch Arman's killer from scratch.

"I'll go under as Lucas' friend. I'll give him the coke in exchange for Harper's dad." Hailey volunteered herself, but not with the same gusto she'd been working the entire case. Something was off and OA's 'spidey senses' were giving him no peace.

"No. These guys have done their homework. They're not gonna buy that." OA knew he made a good point, but he hoped that no one saw the way his shoulders went rigid.

"I get it, but I think I can pull it off."

"No, I agree with OA. It's too risky." Isobel agreed with him and OA felt like he could breathe again, he promised Jay that he'd watch her back, something he couldn't really do if he was watching her not with her. And if he were honest with himself, he'd become a little attached to her in the time they'd been partnered together, hoping that they would become friends.

"So we need a plan C."

"Let me do it. He's my father. I'm the one who got him into this awful situation. So let me do it. Let me do something meaningful. Something that will make me feel good about myself... Please. Gotta let me do it." Harper looked at Hailey, not even acknowledging the rest of the room.

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"You're gonna do great. Just follow the plan we laid out."

"He doesn't get the second bag until you see your father."

"Right. Got it."

"And if your dad's not at the meeting place, you tell the man to bring him there. He'll say no. You stand your ground." Hailey seemed to be offering more comforting advice.

"You have more leverage than you think. This dope is worth a lot of money, and that's all they really care about." While he seemed to be offering more calculated advice.

"It's okay to be nervous. They'd be suspicious if you weren't. You good?"

"I'm good."

"Okay."

"Okay. Here we go."

"Alpha team in position."

"Where's Lucas?" The gang leader, covered in tattoos was menacing as he approached.

"He sent me instead."

"And my product? There's only one kilo here."

"The other four are close by."

"Close by doesn't do me no good."

"Show me where my father is, and I'll get you the other four."

"Don't get cute with me, mama. I'll cut your throat. Go get my dope."

"Let's get ready to move in."

"No, no. Give her a chance."- Hailey was confident, but OA couldn't help but side-eye her. Wondering just what made her so sure.

"You trying to get your dad killed? 'Cause, that's what's happen if you keep playing."

"I need to see him."

"He's alive. I promise."

"I need proof."

"[whistles] Right over there, chica."

"Okay, we got eyes on the dad. We're good to go."

"Wait, wait, wait. Let's see if we can get him talking about Aman's murder. As soon as we see a weapon, we roll."

"Okay." OA knew that Hailey was smart, and she had been making great calls throughout this case, but he was still hesitant. An innocent man's life was in the balance, but he wanted justice for Arman too.

"Be a good girl, go get my dope. Do that, Big Papa walks. I'll go with you."

"So... So... How do I know you're not gonna kill me and my father once I give you the dope?"

"I don't kill civilians. Bad for business."

"You kill that Indian guy? He was a civilian."

"I try my best, but I'm not perfect, mama." Harper meekly retrieved the second bag from behind construction equipment.

"You did good, Harper." But 'good' wasn't enough for him. Suddenly a large silver gun was pointing at the middle of her forehead.

"FBI! Don't move!" OA lead the charge, coming out of hiding and announcing himself the second that they got confirmation that he murdered Arman they'd burst out of the van and beat SWAT to Harper, the Latin Players, and Harper's father.

"Drop your weapon now! Let me see your hands now! Put the gun on the ground! Step away! Put it down now!"

"Get on the ground! Get on the ground, now!"

"Dad!"

"Let me go! Dad! Dad! Dad!" Honestly, he didn't give the tearful father-daughter reunion much attention or thought, but he noticed that Hailey did, if only for a couple of seconds longer than necessary. He didn't know what to make of that, though.

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"Hey."

"I just filed my 302. Do you need help with yours?"

"Nah, I just finished."

"So, I have to admit, I wasn't so sure about you."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't sure about you either. But you're all right. For a fed."

"You wanna grab a beer?"

"I'm okay. You don't have to look after the new kid."

"I am pretty sure you don't need looking after. Come on, you saved my life. The least you can do is let me buy you a drink."

"For the tenth time, I didn't save your life. All right, let's grab a beer, but only if you tell me why you became a fed. I told you my reason. It's only fair you tell me yours."

"Deal."

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They didn't quite 'go out for a beer'. When OA heard Hailey's stomach throw a temper tantrum in the elevator he suggested going out for food that was accompanied by a beer. She'd agreed as long as they didn't go out for "crackers with sauce on them". OA had laughed, not even remotely or phased by Hailey's obsession with Chicago pizza. It's just another thing she shares with Jay. Besides, he wanted to take her somewhere else.

When they sat down Hailey looked around, taking it all in. Omar has been coming to this restaurant all his life. It had been open longer than he'd been alive, he'd even had his tenth birthday here. He hadn't brought Maggie here yet, not because he didn't think they were close enough, he just didn't know how she'd react to realizing that they are that close. "I hope you like Egyptian food."

"I've never had it, but I'm Greek and I know that there are a few shared foods and ingredients."

"Really? I wouldn't have guessed Greek from 'Upton'."

"My parents changed it when they moved here, their name was too difficult for Americans to pronounce, and there was some... Other stuff."

"I'm familiar with 'other stuff'. Do you want any recommendations or need me to explain anything on the menu?"

"You know what? You can choose what I eat tonight. If I like what you pick, I won't tease you for it the rest of the time I'm here."

"Well, for the record-"

"What record?" Hailey laughed.

"For the record, I am completely confident in my knowledge of food so I know I'll find something you'll like. After all, it can't really be bad so long as it's not non-Chicago pizza. Right?"

OA ended up choosing a dish called 'kushari', it wasn't like the Chicago or Mediterranean food Hailey was used to but she'd loved it. OA was smiling at her, proud of his victory, Hailey rolled her eyes, smirking at his impishness. "Tell me about your partner." The question caught him off guard and for a moment he'd felt a significant crack in his walls, leaving him exposed. Suddenly all the feelings he'd been pushing back since Maggie went UC enveloped and starting drowning him. Fear gripped his heart, haunting curiousity stabbed his mind, and loneliness hooked onto his soul. "OA? We don't have to talk about her, I'm sorry I asked, I didn't mean to upset you."

"She's one of the most amazing people I know. She's smart, strong, generous, empathetic, courageous... She's honestly one of the most amazing people in my life and I love having her as my partner." Hailey looked at him the same way his sisters and mother did whenever he spoke about one of the most important people in his life. Like they were able to listen between his words and decipher another meaning to what he'd said. But like his mother, his sisters always gave him hell for it, she said nothing. I couldn't even dispute it if she did say anything.

"She sounds badass."

"She is. What about your partner? Tell me about them?" He'd narrowly averted saying 'him', unsure how she'd react if she knew just how close she and Jay really were, and just how much Jay had told him about her. She got this smitten grin on her face, and OA knew that the roles were reversed from a few moments ago when he had that same smirk and far off look in his eyes. "His name is Jay Halstead, and he's an amazing person, except for when he's getting himself shot, the reckless idiot. He would rather get shot at than get a needle which rattles me to no end, especially because he's so much more kind and intelligent than he gives himself credit for and we need him you know, alive, but still, I admire him so much. He makes me laugh and he just knows how to get to me, you know? I would... I would follow him anywhere. Wow... What is in this food? Truth serum? I'm not usually that open..." It was like he could literally see a forcefield shaping around her. Shrinking in on herself, her face hardening, hastily putting a forkful of food in her mouth. She looked at the wall behind him, pretending to be interested in the decorations, trying to pass off the slight panic in her eyes.

"Maybe it's just my charming demeanour, or that I got personal first, really personal. Or maybe it's because you needed to tell that to someone you don't see every day."

"Yeah. Maybe." She still wouldn't look at him and a tense silence enveloped them until she took a deep breath and shook herself. Light seemingly went off in her head before she gave him an absolutely devilish smirk. "I believe I was promised your origin story."

"Is that what we're calling it? An 'origin story'?"

"It is now."

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"Halstead."

"Get your head out of your dumb ass and ask Hailey out."

"I- OA-"

"You won't regret it, Jay. I actually think that you will regret it if you don't."

"I just don't know if I'm ready to admit anything to myself, forget Hailey."

"When does life ever wait until you're ready, man? Neither of you work in a stable occupation, and even then the universe isn't exactly known for working on anyone else's timeline. I can literally feel you aching for her from here."

"But what if I'm not good enough."

"Oh, I've only known her for a few days and I already know that no one's good enough for her-"

"Damn have you adopted her as another honourary sibling? How many do you have now? And Hailey actually knows you've adopted her, right?"

"Not important, and don't try and change the subject."

"But if no one's good enough for her, then..."

"You're too hard on yourself Jay. No one's good enough for you either. Why shouldn't two people who are far too good for the world be together? You deserve happiness, Jay. You both do, and I think telling her that you're far gone with her would be a great start."

"Thanks, man. Really."

"No problem."

"... So you think that I'm 'far too good for the world'?"

"And now I'm regretting every word we've spoken." No I don't, but your head really doesn't to get bigger.

"Nope, no take-backs. You think that I'm badass and amazing."

"I never said 'badass' or 'amazing'."

"Jay Halstead- described as 'far too good for the world' by the humble and decorated OA Zidan-"

"I also called you a 'dumbass' but whatever, goodnight Jay. And seriously, ask Hailey out."

#One Chicago #Chicago PD #hailey upton #hailey x jay #jay halstead x hailey upton #upstead #upstead fic #jay halstead #OA Zidan #maggie bell #oa zidan x maggie bell #zibell #fbi cbs

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