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aion-rsa · 3 years ago

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Midnight Mass Ending Explained

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This article contains spoilers for Midnight Mass.

Ending a horror story is hard.

Perhaps no one knows that better than Mike Flanagan, the writer-director behind horror hits like Doctor Sleep, The Haunting of Hill House, and The Haunting of Bly Manor. After observing the occasional less-than-enthusiastic reaction to the endings of some of his other projects, Flanagan decided to end his latest, Netflix series Midnight Mass, on his own terms.

“I didn’t want to come up with an ending that I thought would please people,” Flanagan told Den of Geek and other outlets prior to Midnight Mass’s premiere. “I wanted to come up with the ending that would have the most to say down the line.”

So what, exactly, does the ending of Midnight Mass have to say? Let’s explain just what goes down in the conclusion of Midnight Mass and assess what it all means.

What’s Up with Mildred Gunning and John Pruitt?

Monsignor John Pruitt a.k.a. Father Paul (Hamish Linklater) was, by all indications, a good Christian man.

“The thing we kept coming back to is that authentically, through-and-through evil people are very rare. We’re all way more complicated. The humanity of Father Paul was something that was baked in relatively early,” Flanagan says.

Though Pruitt is not a bad man, per se, he is a deeply flawed one. A long time ago, before the “war” (probably World War II or The Korean War), Pruitt hooked up with the married Mildred Gunning and fathered their daughter Sarah Gunning out of wedlock. That is obviously a big no-no for a priest and Pruitt lived with the guilt of denying his daughter for decades.

Pruitt finally got a chance to alleviate that guilt when he came across a curious creature in Damascus. In this fictional universe where the concept of a vampire is clearly not well known, John Pruitt made the understandable mistake of confusing a monstrous vampire for an equally monstrous angel. After all, the angels of the bible are so visually terrifying that they make a habit of telling those they visit “be not afraid.”

Pruitt thought this angel had granted him the gift of eternal life, just like the Bible promises. He then decides to share that gift with his congregation. The priest’s major sin here though is pride. He didn’t share the angel’s gift with his congregation out of pure benevolence. He did it because he wanted many more years of life in his prime with Mildred and Sarah at his side. Catholicism means everything to Pruitt. And yet, he would cast it all aside for another chance to have the family he wanted.

“If you showed up and asked me, I would have taken this collar off and gone with you. Gone with you anywhere in the world,” Pruitt tells Mildred after she’s been vampirified.

That’s a touching sentiment from the artist formerly known as Father Paul but it’s unfortunately a destructive one.

“When it became clear that Paul could do bad things with pure motives, the show came into clearer focus. There’s only one character in the whole show who I think is evil and it’s not Father Paul,” Flanagan says.

Only one character who is evil? Who could Flanagan be referr….ohhh.

What Were the Vampires’ Plans?

Flanagan actually never confirms which character he sees as evil, but Bev Keane (Samantha Sloyan) seems to be the best fit…unless we count the angel, and he just seems to be a hungry, growing boy.

Bev is, let’s say, a real piece of work. As beautifully depicted by Sloyan, Bev Keane is the officious church lady who can’t keep her nose out of other people’s business. After Mildred talks some sense into John Pruitt, he understands that he and his congregation “are the wolves” and refuses to participate further. That leaves a power vacuum at the top, which Bev is more than happy to step into.

Why Midnight Mass is Mike Flanagan’s Most Personal Work

By Alec Bojalad

Midnight Mass Cast: Previous Credits From Hill House to Bly Manor, Legion & Sherlock

By Louisa Mellor

Now that Bev has a veritable army of superpowered vampires what does she intend to do with them? The same thing that all Bevs want to do: make more Bevs. Bev represents the worst of colonial Christianity and its historical penchant for converting all to its kingdom of heaven…through any means necessary.

When Erin Greene (Kate Siegel) finds out that Bev and friends have merely disabled the boats and not destroyed them, she realizes that their ultimate plan is to eventually take their vampire party to the mainland and create a whole planet of enlightened Christians who just happy to have an insatiable taste for blood and a severe UV-ray allergy.

What Happens to Crockett Island?

Thankfully, Bev’s ultimate goal never comes to pass thanks to the careful plotting of the handful of human beings left in Crockett Island. Erin Greene, Sarah Gunning (Annabeth Gish), Sheriff Hassan (Rahul Kohli), and Annie Flynn (Kirstin Lehman) get to work on finishing the destruction that Bev started.

Ironically, it’s part of Bev’s plan that eventually dooms her and her kind. When one of Bev’s lackeys proposes putting out a fire that the human crew started because the whole island could burn to nothing like in ‘84, Bev’s eyes light up.

“I mean…the church didn’t burn in ‘84,” she says.

Surely this is Revelation. And Revelation means a hale mixed with fire and blood. There will be a flood of fire that ends the world and St. Patrick’s church will be the arc. That’s a great plan and all…as long as something doesn’t happen to the arc.

Welp. Sarah Gunning burns down St. Patrick’s and Sheriff Hassan and Erin Greene (with an assist from Hassan’s son) burn down the rec center. As if burning a church designated as an arc wasn’t symbolically compelling enough, recall that the rec center next to it is equally as symbolic of Bev’s greed. It was Bev who convinced Crockett Island to take the oil company’s money for ruining their island rather than pursuing litigation. And all they got out of that settlement money was that stupid rec center.

With the church and the rec center gone, there are no man-made structures for the vampires to hide from the sun in the coming morning. And that’s how an entire island of 120-ish vampires perishes simultaneously when the sun rises.

Why Do Leeza and Warren Survive?

All of Crockett Island perishes save for two actually. Warren Flynn (Igby Rigney) and Leeza Scarborough (Annarah Cymone) are spared thanks to some quick thinking. Putting the only two remaining non-vampirized children in harm’s way is not an option for Erin, Sarah, Hassan, and Annie. Thankfully, Warren knows of one secret canoe to reach the “Uppards” that Bev’s crew wouldn’t know about.

The canoe doesn’t take Warren and Leeza to the mainland but it does get them away from the carnage to come. The last shot of the series is Warren and Leeza floating peacefully and Leeza announcing that she can no longer feel her legs. This means that the last bit of “angel” blood has likely left her system and with it Pruitt’s vampire legacy is over.

Saving Warren and Leeza has practical, emotional implications for Midnight Mass’s characters but it also has some symbolic ones as well. The concept of witnessing and witnesses themselves are very important in the Bible. As a second-hand text (though purportedly with every word inspired by God) there would be no gospel without witnesses. Good news is only half the battle. Someone to witness and report on the good news is the other half. Now Warren and Leeza can report on the ultimate good news that the world is saved.

The fact that the kids survive while the adults succumb to their own adult nonsense has some major implications for Midnight Mass’s creator

“That last moment of the next generation looking out at the ashes of what the grown ups made – that’s what my kids are gonna get no matter what,” Flanagan says. “That’s what all of our kids are gonna get. I wish it wasn’t as on fire as it it. But it really is. We’re never going to be able to explain adequately to our children what happened to the planet they inherited.”

What Happens to the Angel?

With all of Crockett Island burned to the ground, the world’s vampire nightmare is over, right? Well that depends on how well you think an angel can fly with torn wings. No, that’s not an aphorism or a poem, it’s the real question facing the end of Midnight Mass.

As if saving Warren and Leeza and upending Bev Keane’s plans weren’t enough, Erin leaves one last little gift for humanity before she dies. While the angel attacks her and drinks her sweet, sweet blood, Erin begins systematically, yet carefully cutting holes in its leathery wings. At first the angel is kind of annoyed but his hunger supersedes any level of discomfort or pain he’s feeling.

Later on, while Warren and Leeza watch their home burn they see the angel flying away but in a halted, loopy pattern. The kids aren’t sure if the beast will have time to find shelter before the sun rises. According to Flanagan, if Midnight Mass is a parable (and he assures us it is) then the ultimate lesson of all this isn’t too hard to glean.

“The angel doesn’t represent vampirism or horror but corruption in any belief system,” he says. “It represents fundamentalism and fanaticism. That’s never gonna go away. You might chase it away from your community for a minute. You might send it off to the sunrise and hope that that corrupting ideology will disappear. But it won’t. And the show could never show the angel die for that reason.”

With that in mind, the angel’s flawed flight pattern isn’t so much Inception’s spinning top but rather a promise that evil will find a way. And then we puny human beings will just have to find a way to stop it all over again. If that’s not Biblical then we don’t know what is.

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All seven episodes of Midnight Mass are available to stream on Netflix now.

The post Midnight Mass Ending Explained appeared first on Den of Geek.

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bewitching-elizabeth-olsen · 4 years ago

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Press: A Thorough Breakdown of All the Marvel Easter Eggs on WandaVision

Marvel Easter Eggs in WandaVision Episode 1

When Wanda accidentally smashes a plate into Vision’s head, he jokes about his wife and her “flying saucers,” and she comments back about his “indestructible head.” Considering that Vision died after having the Mind Stone ripped from his head, it’s a dark joke to kick off the series.

Vision’s work tie has a visual reference to his comic-book alter ego! In Tom King and Gabriel Hernandez Walta’s Vision, whenever the character dresses as a human, he wears a tie clip that emulates the diamond pattern on his chest.

Vision’s boss, Mr. Hart, is likely named after comic creator Steve Englehart, who created 1985’s The Vision and the Scarlet Witch with Richard Howell, a miniseries that heavily influenced WandaVision.

It’s been heavily implied that Kathryn Hahn’s Agnes is the MCU’s Agatha Harkness, a witch who helped train Wanda’s magic back in the ’70s and ’80s.

When Wanda magically saves dinner, the bottle of wine she pours from is Maison du Mépris, which translates to house of contempt or scorn. As fans have pointed out since the trailer drop, this seems like a reference to the House of M comics storyline in which Wanda bends reality into a new world ruled by her family.

The Stark commercial break refers to two things: Avengers icon Tony Stark and his part in Wanda’s dark past. As Wanda and her twin brother, Pietro, explain in Avengers: Age of Ultron, their parents were killed by an explosive Stark Industries device, leaving the twins trapped under rubble. The Maximoffs were trapped by a Stark Industries shell for two days, expecting it to detonate before they get rescued. Even though Wanda eventually fights beside Tony in the future, there’s still some trauma from that experience and her brother’s death. If it weren’t for the Starks, Wanda could have been a completely different person.

The episode closes with a mysterious observer watching the “show” and taking notes on a pad with the logo of S.W.O.R.D. on the cover. For those who don’t know, S.W.O.R.D stands for Sentient World Observation and Response Department and is a subdivision of S.H.I.E.L.D. It’s a counterterrorism and intelligence agency that deals with extraterrestrial threats to world security. Expect to see them around more.

Marvel Easter Eggs in WandaVision Episode 2

The opening credits for this episode aren’t just an adorable homage to Bewitched but a whole bevy of Marvel Easter eggs! The illustration of the moon happens to be surrounded by six stars, and we can’t help but be reminded of the Infinity Gauntlet.

When Wanda goes to the supermarket in the opening, three references hang above the aisle! Bova Milk refers to Bova, the humanoid cow who raised Wanda and Pietro on Mount Wundagore. Auntie A’s kitty litter is a witchy reference to Auntie Agatha or Agatha Harkness, whom we’ve discussed before, and her cat-like familiar named Ebony. And Wonder Mints is most definitely a cheeky reference to Wonder Man, aka Simon Williams, the superhero who Vision’s brain is based on in the comics!

When animated Wanda and Vision settle on their couch, the small figure on their side table is a statue of the Whizzer. Featured in 1982’s Vision and the Scarlet Witch, the Whizzer thought he was Wanda’s father but later discovers he was wrong. Whizzer and his wife were offered the chance to adopt Wanda and Pietro when they were kids on the mythical Mount Wundagore, but they declined.

When Wanda hears a crash outside the house, she heads out to the front, where she finds a colorful toy helicopter in an otherwise black-and-white world. Not only does the red-and-yellow helicopter have the number 57 stamped on it, but it also bears the S.W.O.R.D symbol! The number is likely in reference to Vision’s first appearance in Avengers #57, while the symbol hints to the presence of S.W.O.R.D outside Wanda’s perfect world.

The creepy, cult-like refrain spoken by the fundraiser organizers of it all being “for the children” seems to be a reference to Wanda’s involvement in the comic event The Children’s Crusade. The story follows her son, Billy, who’s trying to gain control over his reality-warping abilities by looking for a missing Wanda.

Well, here’s another blast from the angsty past! The Strücker timepiece is a very obvious callback to Hydra and Baron von Strücker. The watch bears the unmistakable octopus skull symbol of Hydra, and Strücker is the Hydra leader who recruited Pietro and Wanda for the experimentation that gave them powers. He was later killed by Ultron in his prison cell. Does anyone else hear that ticking noise?

Remember good ol’ Herb? In the comics, a character named Herbert is also the High Evolutionary who runs Mount Wundagore, the very same safe haven where Bova delivered the Maximoff twins. Time will tell if the super-scientist is the same character, but it can’t be a coincidence.

Wanda and Vision’s magic show has two gems that we’ve noticed! First thing, the literal Mind Stone happens to be the design on the doors of the Cabinet of Mystery that plays a huge part in their act. Second, Wanda and Vision use the names Illusion and Glamour for their actor, which are also the names of the magicians that Vision goes to see in an issue of The Vision and the Scarlet Witch.

Though we all enjoy a good jam, The Beach Boys’ “Help Me, Rhonda” gets interrupted by someone asking, “Who’s doing this to you, Wanda?” And doesn’t that voice sound an awful lot like Randall Park’s Jimmy Woo?

While it may seem weird that Wanda shows her pregnancy in an instant, it’s in line with what goes on in the comics. Wanda uses magic to help her have children, which checks out since her husband is a synthezoid.

Oooh, that mysterious beekeeper! Not only does their presence lead to the reveal that Wanda has some control over the reality they’re in, but it also sets off some alarm bells. Even though the beekeeper’s suit bears the S.W.O.R.D logo on the back, the costume is reminiscent of the yellow costumes worn by A.I.M., a military science organization founded by Baron von Strücker. Could this be a sign that Wanda is being watched by more than one organization? And is this a hint that Hydra is back!? (Obviously, it is.)

Source: POPSUGAR

Press: A Thorough Breakdown of All the Marvel Easter Eggs on WandaVision was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen

#Elizabeth Olsen #Avengers #Scarlet Witch #Avengers Infinity War #Avengers Age of Ultron #Captain America Civil War #Kodachrome #Ingrid Goes West #Godzilla #Sorry For Your loss

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seercayder · 3 years ago

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No but I feel as though artists are probably experiencing one of the most hostile years of posting art online that they’ve ever experienced for maybe forever. And I mean this for both amateur artists and professionals (with maybe a lil bit of bias since I also do The Art).

Tumblr’s nudity ban has crippled any piece that is either NSFW or uses nudity as artistic expression and it ultimately drove away both the artists themselves and a lot of their fans, which destroyed any remaining traction for the artists who managed to remain. Tumblr is no longer an artistic freedom-friendly site and it shows, which is a fucking shame bc they genuinely have one of the better tagging systems than other sites and I believe that most feedback on art there has been positive and friendly, which has now gone the way of the dinosaur much like Deviantart.

Twitter has problems with image compression but their biggest issue is toxic abuse, which I find to be the most damaging to artists out of all the other problems i’m listing here. Both the lure of anonymity and the mindset that ‘Speak Loud In Little Words To Make Point Means You Are Important And Right’ has fuelled the absolutely vile comments I have seen directed at artists on the site. Although it’s mainly aimed at fanartists and ship artists, I have noticed unwanted (even rude) criticism on immaculate, well-done art pieces, which is extremely belittling and insulting because the artist (although they may be open to criticism) if they haven’t asked for criticism then that means that they are not in the right mindset to receive any, and therefore it is not your place to throw disparaging comments at them.

But the biggest issue with abuse on Twitter is obviously aimed at fan-artists, especially those those that draw NSFW or “problematic” content. I could go into a whole spiel about how a drawing of a fictional character doesn’t affect reality but in short: If you find disturbing art of a non-existent character (or hey, even non-disturbing art, it’s just something you don’t like) then ignore it. Don’t go and fucking bully the artist you psychopath. If it is truly illegal then report the piece and then see if it gets taken down. Because 90% of the time it won’t be taken down because it doesn’t go against guidelines and you’re just trying to police the site like you’re the thought-police, monitoring other peoples art as if you have the god-given right to. And if you’re a minor stay the fuck out of 18+ accounts. Don’t comment, don’t follow, don’t even look. I am absolutely amazed by the mindset that some children have to waltz into a space not made for them and having the balls to insult the 18+ artist, who have specifically said “no minors”, for posting icky content. It gets even worse when you see how they abuse the Privatter or Curiouscat links the Twitter artists provide, made for anonymous feedback or for being the final barrier for an adult piece that says “hey this stuff is NSFW, don’t click if you are underage, last warning”. I’m gonna go into this more when I cover TikTok in the next few paragraphs. But ultimately, the artists on that site are having to be constantly vigilant against abuse, and it’s not unusual for them having to spend hours going through their 1K+ followers and having to block every underage follower who just didn’t fucking listen to their warnings. Imagine how exhausting and irritating and down-right uncomfortable that must be; having to monitor every fan that sees your work out of fear that they’re a minor seeing adult content or that they could throw abusive comments at you. Horrible.

Instagram is saturated with bots attempting to steal your work or advertise it on their own page and feedback isn’t really a ‘thing’ on there. Also, their algorithm (which may have also been implemented on Twitter, I believe that the Twitter algorithm now avoids promoting popular artist terms, but I can’t be certain bc the Twitter post that pointed this out is long-lost in the depths of my timeline, bc again, no tagging system) is based more around sharing than likes, which can be a huge barrier to artists. Sure, you may like someones art and even leave a nice comment on it, but do you really want to share every piece you come across, especially if it’s not something you would show dear Aunty Susan who follows you? It’s infuriating that a whole site dedicated for images is so difficult to use for artists, and with Instagram implementing features that are similar to Snapchats ‘stories’ it’s clear they’ve moving in a different direction, focusing on momentary attention-grabbing photos. This is simply because Instagram is advertising itself as more of a promotional influencer site nowadays, and anything that could sully their reputation has to be thrown into the algorithm trash. NSFW art or just plain ‘bad’ art? Trash. If you’re not gonna make money for them then why should they bother? You wanna promote your art? Pay for it because the algorithm will absolutely be working against you.

Now, the biggest fucking offender for worst art-sharing site of the year is TikTok (no surprise there), which is absolutely rampant with reposts and uncredited artwork and a gateway for abusive comments against artists. Like the Ouroboros snake, it goes through the same pattern every time; People (usually minors) find art on Twitter or Pinterest and repost it, usually without credit or going against the artist’s wishes about reposting. Then it either goes two-ways: Firstly, if the piece is SFW it will get about five-seconds of interest, a like for the reposter and people will then just move on. TikTok is built entirely around short bursts of satisfaction, feeding a a constant loop of serotonin for a few seconds before you move on. So ultimately, people rarely then hunt down the original artist, especially if their credit isn’t readily available, and usually the original artists doesn’t see any rise in likes, followers or popularity and are usually unaware that their art is even getting any attention on TikTok.

Or, if the art is NSFW, it can go down the second way. It is reposted and, as the majority of TikTok users are under-18, many users find the image uncomfortable, especially if it is a bit more ‘out-there’ or of a ship they don’t like. The reposters sometimes find the image off of Privatter, which is even worse since the piece has been posted to Privatter not just as a final barrier against minors, but also as a form of directing the piece to a specific and niche audience due to it’s... spicer than usual NSFW content. I’m talking really specific pieces with really specific kinks. Now that piece is floating around TikTok, widely seen by the general fans of a fandom, who again, are usually underage. The viewers grow uncomfortable, as the piece is not made for them, especially since sometimes the reposter only posted the piece for shock-value, and would even encourage insulting comments by only posting the credits for the purpose of getting fans to throw abuse at the artist (”The artist is ***** but they ship **** and are icky”) and so the viewers finally decide to make the effort to hunt down the original artist, only to throw insulting and bullying comments at them, made worse by the fact that they are children who don’t have the sense to hold back and have been fuelling their mindset in the echo-chamber that is TikTok.

And as a result of a lot of this hostile feedback for artists, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find a space for amateur artists who are just starting out, since the art community is becoming a little bit scary. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that new (or not even new but recently promoted) sites such as Artstation are becoming a better place for professional artists only, but it is very intimidating for learner artists. That’s not necessarily a bad thing - I believe that part of the reason for Deviantarts decline was that the tagging system was horrible, so good art was being drowned out by amateur, fetish content, so more advanced artists were distancing themselves from the site, especially if they were trying to build a portfolio for employment. I also find that fanart usually gets far more likes than more original art pieces, even if the original piece is amazingly good, which isn’t a criticism against fanart but posting your original piece on a site more aimed at professional pieces may help you reach your target audience better and improve likes and interaction. However, that does mean that if you are an amateur, or hell, just an average artists who is still learning, your best bet for exposure is posting your piece across multiple sites and very, very regularly, braving any abusive comments if you try anything slightly “spicy”. Which, obviously, become a very potentially toxic atmosphere and it’s not uncommon for artists to feel burn-out or depressed at their lack of attention or the cyber-bullying they may receive.

I’m not trying to say that posting artwork has always been easy, but there is definitely a more aggressive culture surrounding it and I think artists have to be aware that chances are they will face insulting comments, reposters, frustrating algorithms, cyber-bullying, a lack of interaction and burn-out as they try and appeal to websites that would do the bare minimum for you in terms of promotion.

This isn’t meant to be a post to scare away artists, I just wanted to point out that there is a big fucking problem and it feels as though it’s getting worse. Nowadays, websites have become a bit too comfortable targeting creators rather than fans when it comes to monitoring content and artists have been put under more and more pressure as they face more and more abuse that is rarely addressed, especially by the sites themselves that host the content. Things that are a huge punch in the face for artists, such as NFT’s, are becoming more normalised and it’s honestly just sad.

#art #sorry for the long post but I get passionate about art #and I feel like every day i'm seeing more and more cyber abuse towards artists and it's honestly depressing #artists #twitter #instagram #tumblr #tagging is the best invention and i'm confused why Twitter doesn't even have a better system for it

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ordinaryschmuck · 4 years ago

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Top 20 BEST Animated Series of the 2010s-2nd Place

If you’ve been paying attention to Disney’s televised animation, you’d noticed that there’s been a weird trend going on with their shows. Recently, most of Disney’s shows begin as random comedies only to have a deep story to them in later seasons. Some shows soar as they do this right, and others tend to flail as they do it wrong. Personally, I would like to think it’s all because of one show that Disney has made. And since its series finale, the network tries their hardest to replicate it due to how well received it was. And despite the many attempts, no one can do better than--

#2-Gravity Falls (2012-2016)

The Plot: Twin siblings Dipper and Mabel Pines are forced by their parents to spend the summer in Gravity Falls, Oregon. But don’t worry, their parents are not entirely careless. They just sent their only children to spend the summer with their con artist of a great uncle with a deep, dark secret...okay, so they're a little careless. In fact, the parents might be more irresponsible than you think because Gravity Falls isn’t the small backwater town as it seems. Soon enough, Dipper and Mabel will learn that it’s a town with monsters, demons, and a mysterious author who recorded all of the town’s weirdness in his journals. Will the Pines twins solve the town's mysteries, or is their summer going to be over sooner than they thought?

By the way, I FREAKING love this premise! The idea of an entire town being filled with mysteries and monsters is so compelling to me because the possibilities are endless. One episode could be dealing with zombies, and another could be dealing with an entire society dedicated to keeping the town’s weirdness a secret. On top of that, every monster/weird oddity that Dipper and Mable face is just so creative, from a multi-headed bear to even the main antagonist being (and I kid you not) the Illuminati symbol wearing a top hat. And even when the show does use monsters you’ve seen before, they utilize them in a way you wouldn’t have expected. For example, there are two episodes where the characters deal with ghosts. In both scenarios, the methods these ghosts use to haunt the living are not just creative and scary, but in some instances, they can also be kinda funny. There’s just no telling what this show is going to pull off. Or at least, not entirely.

Because another great thing this show has is its mystery element. And I don’t mean just how well it handles mystery within a single episode (although it does that phenomenally too). What I mean is that Gravity Falls has a great overarching mystery that you, the audience, can solve for yourself. With that comes the show’s impressive attention to detail. From the secret codes to solve, to the lines/scenes you wouldn’t have thought twice about, to even a single license plate. That’s right. A single license plate is an essential clue to the show's most significant twist ever. In fact, it’s a twist that fans have solved years in advance due to all the hints that were left within previous episodes. And most of the credit goes to Alex Hirsh and his team. They really put a lot of effort into what many would describe, a kids cartoon. Even though this might just be the most adult kid's cartoon that I have ever seen.

You know how Pixar movies try their darndest to make films suitable for both children and their parents? That’s basically what Gravity Falls does. Whether you’re an adult or child, odds are you will be entertained in nearly every episode because rarely does it feel like an episode leans too far in either direction. If there’s an episode with a serious story, there’s always a silly/lighthearted subplot to keep the kids entertained. And if there’s an episode that is just silly all the way through, there are adult jokes that make you ask, “How the hell did a Disney cartoon get away with that?” Even when the show gets genuinely creepy, it works just perfectly above the line of going too far for kids (except in “Northwest Mansion Mystery." S**t gets real in that episode). Many kid's shows in the 2010s struggled to find this balance, and Gravity Falls is another one of those rare exceptions that somehow feels like it does it without even trying.

And what keeps that balance? The show’s sense of humor, that’s what. Even in the darkest episodes of the series, there is almost a well-placed joke to lighten the mood. And with Gravity Falls, the show relies on four types of humor. Being random, being surreal, being smart, and being dark. And not just dark for a Disney cartoon. I mean that Gravity Falls has a dark sense of humor that I would have expected in something like Rick and Morty (which is fitting because the creators of both shows are actually close friends in real life). As for how funny the jokes are in this series, they. Are. SO. Funny. I’m not kidding when I say that every single episode--and I do mean, every. Single. Episode--has made me laugh at least once. Not even the best comedy shows that I’ve seen have been capable of doing something so spectacular.

But do you want to know why the comedy is so hilarious? And do you want to know what really kept me invested in all 40 episodes? The answer is simple: It’s all because of the characters. Most jokes are funny because the right person said them. I care about the show’s mysteries because the characters make me care about those mysteries. And when the stakes get high, I’m invested because I care about the characters so much that I fear they’ll get hurt. In fact, I was so invested in all of these characters that the series finale made me cry FOUR TIMES due to how heart-wrenching it was. And I don’t weep that often when it comes to specific media. Most of the time, I get a little misty-eyed, and even when it feels like a scene has yanked at my heartstrings, I usually get myself under control before any real tears show up. But with the series finale of Gravity Falls, I was so emotionally invested with this cast that I was tearing up with them as tearful goodbyes were said. This is because Gravity Falls’ writers know that the key to making any story work is to have a great cast of characters. Because it doesn’t matter how epic your plot is. If I’m not invested in the characters winning the day, then I won’t be invested in the story.

Now at this point, you’re probably wondering what is wrong with this show. To that, I say virtually nothing...Okay, that’s not true. There are some problems the show has, but trust me when I say that the good heavily outweighs the bad. Are there occasional continuity errors? Yes. But they’re usually intentional for misdirection or made up with really great attention to detail in other scenes. Are there occasionally bad jokes? Of course. But like I said: EVERY. EPISODE. IS. FUNNY. So who cares if not every joke lands? Are there also a couple bland characters? Obviously. However, they’re either made better in later episodes or forgotten quickly due to even more memorable characters. And now the big one: Are there bad episodes? And there are...in comparison to the show’s usual quality. Even when Gravity Falls is at its “worst,” the writing is still somehow entertaining in its own right. Hell, the real complaint I have involving the series isn’t even about the show itself. It’s about other shows on the network.

Like I’ve said in the beginning, as of late, there has been a lot of modern Disney cartoons trying too hard to be the new Gravity Falls. And they’re all best intentions met with poor execution. The best (or should I say worst) example I can think of is Tangled: The Series, a television series based on Disney’s Tangled. The first batch of episodes was cute, harmless, and downright charming. Then halfway through the first season, it becomes dark, dark, and even darker. And unfortunately, the show’s quality feels like it took a dip with its direction. As for other Disney cartoons, they follow a similar pattern, with the thought that Gravity Falls did the same thing. The problem is that it didn’t. From the very first episode, the show started off by hinting that it isn’t as cute and innocent as it seems. Sure the stories got significantly darker in season two, but they slowly worked their way towards earning that by slowly becoming more dramatic with each episode. And like I said, even at its darkest, the writers still knew when to keep the tone light. So that’s really the only logical problem I have with Gravity Falls: It made people think they need to be more like Gravity Falls.

When I hear that people wish the show was brought back, I honestly don’t get it. The series ended on a perfect note, with very few questions left unanswered. And the unanswered questions were actually answered through other media such as books or comics. And if you ask me, I’d rather have the series come to an end in the way that it did. It had a perfect premise told with fascinating mysteries, funny comedy, infesting characters, and even a kickass theme song (I know that I didn’t mention that last bit, but trust me when I say that it’s so GOOD). Why ruin that by turning it into something like The Simpsons, where a show would just get stale after too many seasons? In the end, while I was sad to see it go, I’m still happy to say that this is always going to be a show that will make you Fall in love with it.

(But the real mystery is: What series is going to top a cartoon that was practically perfect?)

(...)

(Who am I kidding. You’ve probably already figured it out by now.)

#top 20 of 2010s #gravity falls #what i thought about

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skidar · 5 years ago

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Disney announces a ‘live action’ (hyper-realistic CGI animation) remake of Bambi

I’m sure most of the world is tired of the Disney remakes and sequels that have been plaguing the box offices as of recent years. With all the stories of the world that have yet to be told, Disney is opting to stay in the illusionary ‘safe lane’ and continue the hash out the same products it already knows will sell instead of trying to cobble together an original feature. It’s hard to believe that the animation company that backs amazing original tv show ideas like Gravity Falls, The Owl House and Amphibia cannot fathom how to make an original animated movie. Is Disney actually scared of risk? It shouldn’t be! Disney is literally too big. A massive media monopoly that could literally make flop after flop in the box office over and over in experimentation and not fail. So many indie studios do NOT have that luxury and yet still take crazy risks to tell us new stories in new ways. Disney used to be the animation pioneers but recently the only thing Disney seems to create are re-hashes of its classics that fall all too short. Disney is focusing on the visual realism in its films while seemingly ignoring the heart and soul that made the originals so successful. The most recent and best example was The Lion King remake. While the films boasts near-flawlessly realistic animals, their stoic expressions and restricted movement made them unappealing. The movie copied dialogue from the original word-for-word and nearly shot for shot but the focus on the realism cut the character’s charm completely out. The ‘I Just Can’t Wait To Be King’ number lost all its stylistic qualities that made the song bright and colorful and the character’s lip-syncing to the songs was emotionless and stale. The characters also no long moved with expressive freedom. Are they happy? Sad? Overjoyed? We wouldn’t know. The Lion King remake was devastatingly disappointing. A realistic skin stretched over the bones of a far better film while letting no charm or heart escape the cold, hyper realistic faces.

Surely Disney would realize the mistake and stop. Right? Surely they could dig around their submissions box and try to make something new with the skills they obviously have without resulting to re-hashing it’s already successful classics. Right?

Wrong.

Disney now has Bambi on its chopping block of remakes and plans to do to it what it’s done to The Lion King. Virtually gut it.

Bambi cannot be remade successfully as a hyper realistic film today. You could tell the story, yes, based off the original book, Bambi: A Life in The Woods by Felix Salton, but it would not be the visual masterpiece of the original. Let me explain:

Bambi was the 5th animated feature by Walt Disney but it was MEANT to be one of the first. Walt wanted to make Bambi from the beginning but he wanted to make it ‘right.’ He wanted to stray away from the ‘toony’ simplified animals of Snow White and Pinocchio and instead focus on realism, anatomy and expression. He brought live animals into the studios and worked with animal artists to develop a healthy balance of realistic anatomy and exaggerated features. Ie: Bambi’s large forehead and eyes symbolized that of a toddler as a young deer.

Bambi also pioneered new ways of technology, the early pan-shot of the forest in the beginning of the movie was made by painting trees on long panes of glass and then stacking the glass vertically and sliding the panes around to show depth. By sliding the camera on a track from left to right, the viewer was transported through a ‘3D’ forest that moved and shifted with them. Bambi also brought about the study of the art of water physics for the ‘Little April Shower’ scene. By filming and photographing drops of milk, the animators learned how to draw the intricate patterns of a splashing drop of water on a leaf or in a puddle.

Speaking of animators, Bambi employed at least four of Walt Disney’s ‘Nine Old Men’ some of the most well-known character animators in history: Milt Kahl, Frank Johnson, Ollie Thomas and Marc Davis. The iconic movements of Bambi and the other animals would not have been possible with them, but the biggest artistic influencer of Bambi was a young Chinese-American man name Tyrus Wong. Tyrus Wong had been an inbetweener animator on Pinocchio but expressed interest in Bambi by privately submitting some sketches to Walt. He was hired and became the lead production illustrator of the film. Tyrus Wong’s beautiful watercolor backgrounds were soft and simple, setting a film steeped in nostalgia, innocence and beauty of the natural world. Without Tyrus Wong, the film would have been completely different.

Bambi was also the first Walt Disney film to recognize a woman in its screen credits. Traditionally, women often worked in the Disney Ink and Paint department coloring cels. Retta Scott was a storyboard artist that worked mostly on scenes with Bambi and his mother, but became well known for her savage hunting dogs sketches that caught the eye of Walt Disney during production. Many men were shocked at the ferocity of her dogs because ‘she was a women and shouldn’t have been able to draw something so vicious,’ but she became the lead animator for the hunting dogs that chased Faline during Man’s hunt. She was tutored by another member of the Nine Old Men, Eric Larson. Retta Scott’s continued yet under-appreciated success opened doors for many women in the animation industry.

Bambi was a film of massive risks and little payoff. It challenged style, it pushed animators to their limits, it experimented in technology, color and technique. It opened doors for marginalized people that usually had doors slammed in their face. It received backlash for its violence and the anguish of loss and its questionable suitability for children. Bambi broke boundaries… but wasn’t much a success until it’s future re-releases.

Bringing us back to the present. Disney announces a Bambi remake similar to the failed ‘Lion King.’ There will be no luscious backgrounds of Tyrus Wong. There will be no jaunty gaited fawns crafted by the masterful Nine Old Men. There will be no ferocious hounds carved by the hand of Retta Scott to make a path for women. There will be a story of a deer in the woods. A ‘real deer’ in ‘real woods.’ It will be hollow and lifeless. It will be eye-candy at best, but it will not be better than the original. The original is a true masterpiece. It is not something that needs to be redone or retold. Bambi was a risk, a risk that didn’t pay off in the beginning but today it is a marvel. A true testament of art and love of the craft and it cannot be replaced. Disney should not remake Bambi, they should learn from it, they should learn that they are big enough to take risks and they can. They should learn to give marginalized creators a chance to shine because they have something amazing to share. They need to let go, move on, and embrace the fear of the untold story. I hope that in the years to come, the age of remakes and sequels will stop and we can look forward to a new era of wonderful stories that get to be told for the first time in animation.

Bambi is my favorite movie in the world. I have seen it well into the hundreds if not quad digits. I watch it when I’m happy, I watch it when I’m devastated. I watch it when I’m sick and I watch it when I wake up from a nightmare and can’t fall back asleep. Bambi is what made me want to become an artist and I have a lot of personal feelings about the movie as a work of art. I’m not looking forward to the remake, I can only hope and hope and hope that Disney learned from the Lion King and won’t make the same mistakes again. Until then, we just have to wait...

#skidar art #bambi #bambi essay #I guess??#remakes #disney #deer #fawn #bambi 1942

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pennypeabody · 5 years ago

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Mädchen Amick teases Riverdale directorial debut, and what she learned from David Lynch

Mädchen Amick wasn't planning to direct the Riverdale season 4 finale. But when the coronavirus pandemic halted production across the world, her directorial debut on the CW series moved into the coveted spot.

"You want it to be exciting and climactic and really building its energy, so I wanted to honor that," the actress tells EW of her fateful episode. "There was a little extra pressure."

Amick has been directing since 2015, beginning with one of her daughter Mina Tobias' music videos. And while Riverdale has kept her busy playing Alice Cooper, the uptight, haunted mother of Betty (Lili Reinhart), since 2017, she has long dreamed of stepping behind the camera as well.

She finally got her shot for "Killing Mr. Honey," which was originally intended as the 19th installment of the 22-episode season. Now it will have to stand as the conclusion — and Amick warns that it ends on a cliffhanger.

In the photos above and below, EW has an exclusive behind-the-scenes look at Amick's directing days on Riverdale. And ahead of the episode's May 6 airing, we called up Amick to discuss her experiences calling the shots, what it was like pulling double duty, and how working with David Lynch early in her career inspired her as an auteur.

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: How long have you had an itch to direct, and how did this episode come about?

MÄDCHEN AMICK: I moved to L.A. at 16, and got Twin Peaks at 17. I would say around my mid-20s, I had it in the back of my mind that I wanted to be more than just an actress and be a storyteller, but so many things in my career made me busy and made me feel like, "Oh, I don’t have time to step behind the camera. I have to keep busy and focused on staying in front of the camera." This was in the mid-'90s, and there were a few female directors — one in particular was Diane Keaton on the original Twin Peaks — that showed me there are women doing this, but [now] there’s a little bit of this movement to get more diversity behind the camera that I benefitted from. I have to give credit to my husband and my daughter. She asked me to direct her music video, and I was honored and jumped right in. I’ve done a few music videos. I’ve directed and produced a docuseries pilot. At the beginning of Riverdale when I did that first thing, I’d started asking around and asking [creator Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa] and [producers] Sarah Schechter and Greg Berlanti. I said, "Hey, guys, I really would love to direct an episode." They were super-supportive and excited. So it was this season that Roberto said, "You want to direct this season?" And I was like, "Yes!"

Riverdale has a very specific, highly stylized aesthetic. Did that make directing easier or harder, especially when it comes to putting your own stamp on the episode?

It was easy for me. I know the show so well, inside and out. I really enjoy the storytelling and the filmmaking part of it. So I know what Roberto likes, as far as the way he likes the story to be told and unfold. That was a great template that was already in place, and I wanted to honor that. Then, I just wanted to elevate it as much as I could and get as strong as performances out of all my fellow actors, which they were great and supportive. And just push the visual boundaries as much as possible. Presenting new ways to shoot scenes, but still staying within the world and the visual look to it, and just hoping that Roberto loved it.

I remember Roberto and I had a conversation: It might’ve been season 2 or season 3, but there was an episode and he said it didn’t feel very inspired. That really gave me an insight into [that] he really wants directors to come on board and love the show and be excited about the show, and then bring an inspirational take to it. That made me feel I had a little bit of freedom to run with it, and he didn’t want a cookie cutter, just make everything the same. It was nice to hear he wanted something that was inspired.

When you directed the episode, it wasn’t meant to be the season finale, but now it is. Is that exciting? Nerve-racking?

Since it's [episode] 19 of 22, you are getting to the end, so there’s usually a lot of climactic things happening. That’s a lot of responsibility, just because I want to get it right. I know we’re getting toward the end, and those last few are really important to start tying up loose ends or building to a cliffhanger. You want it to be exciting and climactic and really building its energy, so I wanted to honor that. There was a little extra pressure.

Did it lead to any last-minute adjustments or changes in the storytelling?

The episode that I shot was the last episode that we completed as far as filming. We were halfway through 20 when production stopped, so I was editing when production stopped. At that point, we didn’t really know that the season would be done. It was a little bit of a holding pattern of, "Are we just pausing and we’ll get back to it, or will our season end a little short?" Now knowing my episode will serve as the finale for this season, obviously we’ll pick up back up next season. They’ll have to adjust some storytelling with what they had planned at the end of this season. As far as my episode, it pretty much stayed intact the way it was written. There was a new layer that came into the story that now serves as an interesting cliffhanger.

You also appear as Alice throughout the episode. What was it like having to pull double duty?

I’m not gonna lie, it was a huge challenge. My brain was so much behind the camera that it was hard for me to switch over to being in character. I could easily slip into Alice, but I could not remember my lines, and I’m usually really good at that. I was really struggling. In one scene in particular, there’s a big confrontation that Alice has with Mr. Honey and she drives the whole scene with all of the parents, and I could not remember it, to the point where my fellow actors were whispering the lines to me to try to help me get through it. Man, it was rough. I know I’ll continue to get better with that with practice, but my brain was not in that space at all. I was full-on thinking of shots and directing my other actors, so it was a big challenge.

This episode is going to have to hold us over for a while; what can you tease about it? Would you say it’s a satisfactory end to the season?

The whole theme of the episode is the big confrontation between the kids and their awful Principal Honey, who’s just been tormenting them the whole season. So lots of really, really fun stuff. There’s a mixture of some fantasy of what they want to do to Mr. Honey and some reality of what ends up happening to Mr. Honey. So that’s the big tease.

The back half of the season angered so many Varchie and Bughead fans, and it doesn’t seem like the same instant regret Archie and Betty have had over previous kisses. What can you say about where those relationships and feelings are headed? Might Riverdale be exploding some of its most beloved relationships?

[Laughs] Why? Why were they upset? No, but don’t they always teeter on that? I think Roberto loves to torture the fans, quite frankly. That’s the fun dynamic, and that is what’s classic to the Archie Comics, is you have this love triangle that’s always been between Archie, Betty, Veronica, and now we’ve thrown in Jughead into the mix. It’s complicated, but we’ll see what ends up happening at the end of senior year and where relationships really go. I know the plan for the next season is we were going to jump forward in time and see where everybody had landed, but I don’t know if that’s gonna adjust now that our season changed a bit.

Both Skeet Ulrich and Marisol Nichols had announced they were leaving at the end of this season, leaving you as the only original Riverdale parent left standing. Now that filming has ended early, does that alter their plans? Will we get any hint of where F.P. and Hermione were originally headed?

As far as the episode I directed, there wasn’t really anything different happening for their characters. It was the same story line going on. But with technically three more episodes they had planned, I’m assuming they had plans. I also know Roberto really loves Skeet and Marisol, and he told me he hopes their characters can come and go from the show depending on everyone’s availability. It’s always funny whenever some of our characters die on the show, it’s like, "Oh, well that guarantees you’ll be on more often." Nobody’s ever really gone on Riverdale.

Does it feel weird to know Alice was going to be the last one left? And what might that mean for her going forward? She seems so happy with FP, it’s really sad to imagine that ending.

I know! They were finally doing good. I don’t know what Roberto has planned, but yeah, poor Alice. She’s really going to be alone now. Maybe she’ll just be ruling the town, who knows? Maybe we need to start a new campaign, Mayor Alice. Obviously not until next year, but just even thinking about coming back next season and having all my O.G. homies not around on a consistent basis, it’s definitely going to be really sad. I’m absolutely going to miss them, but I know that won’t end our friendship.

Earlier in the season, we had evidence Chic and Charles are working together. Will we see any answers there, and what might it mean for Alice to discover her long-lost son has betrayed her once again?

We hadn’t gotten into that for my episode. I think that was in the next few, so she hasn’t experienced the betrayal yet. I know she’s really resilient, but there’s been a lot of betrayal in this woman’s life. I think Alice is going to need some therapy next season.

And not of the Farm variety.

Real, good old-fashioned traditional therapy.

We were setting up for high school graduation to round out this season, and the characters going off to college or other futures. Will we ever get some taste of graduation, and have you any hint of where the kids will end up next year?

No, I don’t. I know the idea was we were going to jump forward in time a little bit to see what they had done. I’m assuming something brings them back to the town of Riverdale.

Can you point to moment or visual choice that you felt defined your identity or artistic choices?

Jughead and Betty have a fantasy going about what they would do to Mr. Honey, and so Betty’s revenge fantasy inspires Jughead to write an essay for college submissions. We get to go into and reenact Jughead’s fantasies and his writing. I wanted to push the envelope in those scenes. You don’t want to go too far out of the way where you’re totally getting rid of reality, but I wanted to visually have some fun with breaking the rules of what you’re supposed to do with shots and how you edit them together. Jughead is all about classic storytelling, so my inspiration was Alfred Hitchcock and Citizen Kane and that kind of stuff. We did a lot of twisted shots and shots that moved in weird [ways], very Vertigo- or Citizen Kane-inspired.

How much were you influenced by the visual artistry of working with David Lynch so early in your career?

He was my mentor from the very beginning. I didn’t really know too much about filmmaking until I worked on Twin Peaks with him. He showed me you think outside the box and do things that feel and look right to you. It wasn’t until I went into the business after Twin Peaks that I realized how different and what an innovator he was. That’s always been in there as my base, to just not be afraid of taking risks. He sent me a really beautiful email my first day of directing, and just reminding me to make sure I did every single thing I want in every single shot, and to have fun.

#mädchen amick #falice #bughead #riverdale #varchie #riverdale season 4 #4x19 #director Mädchen #skeet Ulrich #fp jones #Alice Smith

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ooffies · 4 years ago

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About my ocs!

(Obviously I used picrews to make all of these so credit to all the creators of these)

Flora:

Name: Flora Fernsby

Gender: Female

Race: Demon (Wrath)

Family: Father and 2 brothers

Occupation/s: Satan's righthand woman, student at R.A.D, part time worker at her father's cafe.

Hobbies: Gardening, baking/cooking, photography and pottery.

Some of her favorite things: Plants, tea, cake and anything floral patterned.

Physical features

Hair color: green

Eye color: pink

Height: 5'8

About

Flora is a very outgoing and cheerful, she's almost always wearing a smile on her face.

She's always there to lend an ear when you need one.

Her friends and family are very important to her and the easiest way to make her angry is be insulting or hurting them or ruining her plants

But on the other hand she is very good at controlling her anger on most circumstances.

She is more of a silent angry person and won't often yell when she's mad at someone. She'll probably just give them a death glare and insult them into oblivion.

Past

Before she became Satan's righthand (aka before he came to the Devildom) she worked at father's cafe full time.

When she became Satan's righthand she started going to R.A.D with him.

They actually got along quite well off bat and would always be by each other's side. They still very close and hangout with each other a lot.

Leo:

Name: Leo

Gender: Male

Race: Demon (Greed)

Family: none

Occupation: Mammon's righthand man

Hobbies: Reading, Fashion and Painting

Some of his favorite things: Clothes, money, cigarettes and video games

Physical features

Hait color/s: Black but he dyed is bangs blonde

Eye color: blue

Height: 6'4

About

Leo is a very laid back and chill guy and he usually just goes with the flow of things

If he's not looking after Mammon or "cleaning up" after him, you can probably find him at a bar or clothing store in his free time

Like Flora his friends are really important and he'll do anything to protect them.

Unlike Mammon he actually has a lot of money and isn't broke

Him and Lord Diavolo are actually really good friends because he used to work as his bodyguard

He and Lucifer kinda have a love/hate relationship. But if you ask them they'll both say they hate each other.

Past

As said before, he was on of Lord Diavolo's bodyguards before he became Mammon's righthand. ( The fourth photo of him is what he looked like when he was a bodyguard)

Besides that, no one really knows about his past. If you ask him about it he'll just avoid the question.

He and Mammon got along pretty well from the start although it was a bit awkward at first cause they didn't know how to talk to each other

#obey me!#obey me #obey me ocs #about my ocs

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tlbodine · 5 years ago

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The Wendigo is Not What You Think

There’s been a recent flurry of discussion surrounding the Wendigo -- what it is, how it appears in fiction, and whether non-Native creators should even be using it in their stories. This post is dedicated to @halfbloodlycan, who brought the discourse to my attention.

Once you begin teasing apart the modern depictions of this controversial monster, an interesting pattern emerges -- namely, that what pop culture generally thinks of as the “wendigo” is a figure and aesthetic that has almost nothing in common with its Native American roots...but a whole lot in common with European Folklore.

What Is A Wendigo?

The Algonquian Peoples, a cluster of tribes indigenous to the region of the Great Lakes and Eastern Seaboard of Canada and the northern U.S., are the origin of Wendigo mythology. For them, the Wendigo (also "windigo" or "Witigo" and similar variations) is a malevolent spirit. It is connected to winter by way of cold, desolation, and selfishness. It is a spirit of destruction and environmental decay. It is pure evil, and the kind of thing that people in the culture don't like to talk about openly for fear of inviting its attention.

Individual people can turn into the Wendigo (or be possessed by one, depending on the flavor of the story), sometimes through dreams or curses but most commonly through engaging in cannibalism. Considering the long, harsh winters in the region, it makes sense that the cultural mythology would address the cannibalism taboo.

For some, the possession of the Wendigo spirit is a very real thing, not just a story told around the campfire. So-called "wendigo psychosis" has been described as a "culture-bound" mental illness where an individual is overcome with a desire to eat people and the certainty that he or she has been possessed by a Wendigo or is turning into a Wendigo. Obviously, it was white people encountering the phenomenon who thought to call it "psychosis," and there's some debate surrounding the whole concept from a psychological, historical, and anthropological standpoint which I won't get into here -- but the important point here is that the Algonquian people take this very seriously. (1) (2)

(If you're interested in this angle, you might want to read about the history of Zhauwuno-geezhigo-gaubow (or Jack Fiddler), a shaman who was known as something of a Wendigo hunter. I'd also recommend the novel Bone White by Ronald Malfi as a pretty good example of how these themes can be explored without being too culturally appropriative or disrespectful.)

Wendigo Depictions in Pop Culture

Show of hands: How many of you reading this right now first heard of the Wendigo in the Alvin Schwartz Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book?

That certainly was my first encounter with the tale. It was one of my favorite stories in the book as a little kid. It tells about a rich man who goes hunting deep in the wilderness, where people rarely go. He finds a guide who desperately needs the money and agrees to go, but the guide is nervous throughout the night as the wind howls outside until he at last bursts outside and takes off running. His tracks can be found in the snow, farther and farther apart as though running at great speed before abruptly ending. The idea being that he was being dragged along by a wind-borne spirit that eventually picked him up and swept him away.

Schwartz references the story as a summer camp tale well-known in the Northeastern U.S., collected from a professor who heard it in the 1930s. He also credits Algernon Blackwood with writing a literary treatment of the tale -- and indeed, Blackwood's 1910 novella "The Wendigo" has been highly influential in the modern concept of the story.(3) His Wendigo would even go on to find a place in Cthulhu Mythos thanks to August Derleth.

Never mind, of course, that no part of Blackwood's story has anything in common with the traditional Wendigo myth. It seems pretty obvious to me that he likely heard reference of a Northern monster called a "windigo," made a mental association with "wind," and came up with the monster for his story.

And so would begin a long history of white people re-imagining the sacred (and deeply frightening) folklore of Native people into...well, something else.

Through the intervening decades, adaptations show up in multiple places. Stephen King's Pet Sematary uses it as a possible explanation for the dark magic of the cemetery's resurrectionist powers. A yeti-like version appears as a monster in Marvel Comics to serve as a villain against the Hulk. Versions show up in popular TV shows like Supernatural and Hannibal. There's even, inexplicably, a Christmas episode of Duck Tales featuring a watered-down Wendigo.

Where Did The Antlered Zombie-Deer-Man Come From?

In its native mythology, the Wendigo is sometimes described as a giant with a heart of ice. It is sometimes skeletal and emaciated, and sometimes deformed. It may be missing its lips and toes (like frostbite). (4)

So why, when most contemporary (white) people think of Wendigo, is the first image that comes to mind something like this?

Well...perhaps we can thank a filmmaker named Larry Fessenden, who appears to be the first person to popularize an antlered Wendigo monster. (5) His 2001 film (titled, creatively enough, Wendigo) very briefly features a sort of skeletal deer-monster. He’d re-visit the design concept in his 2006 film, The Last Winter. Reportedly, Fessenden was inspired by a story he’d heard in his childhood involving deer-monsters in the frozen north, which he connected in his mind to the Algernon Blackwood story.

A very similar design would show up in the tabletop game Pathfinder, where the “zombie deer-man” aesthetic was fully developed and would go on to spawn all sorts of fan-art and imitation. (6) The Pathfinder variant does draw on actual Wendigo mythology -- tying it back to themes of privation, greed, and cannibalism -- but the design itself is completely removed from Native folklore.

Interestingly, there are creatures in Native folklore that take the shape of deer-people -- the ijiraq or tariaksuq, shape-shifting spirits that sometimes take on the shape of caribou and sometimes appear in Inuit art in the form of man-caribou hybrids (7). Frustratingly, the ijiraq are also part of Pathfinder, which can make it a bit hard to find authentic representations vs pop culture reimaginings. But it’s very possible that someone hearing vague stories of northern Native American tribes encountering evil deer-spirits could get attached to the Wendigo, despite the tribes in question being culturally distinct and living on opposite sides of the continent.

That “wendigo” is such an easy word to say in English probably has a whole lot to do with why it gets appropriated so much, and why so many unrelated things get smashed in with it.

I Love the Aesthetic But Don’t Want to Be Disrespectful, What Do I Do?

Plundering folklore for creature design is a tried-and-true part of how art develops, and mythology has been re-interpreted and adapted countless times into new stories -- that’s how the whole mythology thing works.

But when it comes to Native American mythology, it’s a good idea to apply a light touch. As I’ve talked about before, Native representation in modern media is severely lacking. Modern Native people are the survivors of centuries of literal and cultural genocide, and a good chunk of their heritage, language, and stories have been lost to history because white people forcibly indoctrinated Native children into assimilating. So when those stories get taken, poorly adapted, and sent back out into the public consciousness as make-believe movie monsters, it really is an act of erasure and violence, no matter the intentions of the person doing it. (8)

So, like...maybe don’t do that?

I won’t say that non-Native people can’t be interested in Wendigo stories or tell stories inspired by the myth. But if you’re going to do it, either do it respectfully and with a great deal of research to get it accurate...or use the inspiration to tell a different type of story that doesn’t directly appropriate or over-write the mythology (see above: my recommendation for Bone White).

But if your real interest is in the “wendigocore” aesthetic -- an ancient and powerful forest protector, malevolent but fiercely protective of nature, imagery of deer and death and decay -- I have some good news: None of those things are really tied uniquely to Native American mythology, nor do they have anything in common with the real Wendigo.

Where they do have a longstanding mythic framework? Europe.

Europeans have had a long-standing fascination with deer, goats, and horned/antlered forest figures. Mythology of white stags and wild hunts, deer as fairy cattle, Pan, Baphomet, Cernunnos, Herne the Hunter, Black Phillip and depictions of Satan -- the imagery shows up again and again throughout Greek, Roman, and British myth. (9)

Of course, some of these images and figures are themselves the product of cultural appropriation, ancient religions and deities stolen, plundered, demonized and erased by Christian influences. But their collective existence has been a part of “white” culture for centuries, and is probably a big part of the reason why the idea of a mysterious antlered forest-god has stuck so swiftly and firmly in our minds, going so far as to latch on to a very different myth. (Something similar has happened to modern Jersey Devil design interpretations. Deer skulls with their tangle of magnificent antlers are just too striking of a visual to resist).

Seriously. There are so, so many deer-related myths throughout the world’s history -- if aesthetic is what you’re after, why limit yourself to an (inaccurate) Wendigo interpretation? (10)

So here’s my action plan for you, fellow white person:

Stop referring to anything with antlers as a Wendigo, especially when it’s very clearly meant to be its own thing (the Beast in Over the Garden Wall, Ainsworth in Magus Bride)

Stop “reimagining” the mythology of people whose culture has already been targeted by a systematic erasure and genocide

Come up with a new, easy-to-say, awesome name for “rotting deer man, spirit of the forest” and develop a mythology for it that doesn’t center on cannibalism

We can handle that, right?

This deep dive is supported by Ko-Fi donations. If you’d like to see more content, please drop a tip in my tip jar. Ko-fi.com/A57355UN

NOTES:

1 - https://io9.gizmodo.com/wendigo-psychosis-the-probably-fake-disease-that-turns-5946814

2 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendigo#Wendigo_psychosis

3 - https://www.gutenberg.org/files/10897/10897-h/10897-h.htm

4 - https://www.legendsofamerica.com/mn-wendigo/

5- https://www.reddit.com/r/Cryptozoology/comments/8wu2nq/wendigo_brief_history_of_the_modern_antlers_and/

6 - https://pathfinderwiki.com/wiki/Wendigo

7 - https://www.mythicalcreaturescatalogue.com/single-post/2017/12/06/Ijiraq

8 - https://www.backstoryradio.org/blog/the-mythology-and-misrepresentation-of-the-windigo/

9 - https://www.terriwindling.com/blog/2014/12/the-folklore-of-goats.html

10 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deer_in_mythology

#horror #folklore #mythology #deep dive #wendigo #cultural appropriation #monster design #creature design #long post #if you need a place to channel your deerman aesthetic #may I suggest huntokar from welcome to nightvale #100% fictional #100% awesome

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gorebabybunny · 5 years ago

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Furby wish list!

Welp, its happened yet again...

I’ve found another thing I want to collect. So, might as well compile this list since tumblr is a pretty big furby hot spot.

Lets divide this shall we? I’ll be going by generation, most of these are in want to either custom or theme after a character!

1998 FURBIES;

These are the original furbies, small, less fluffy, but had a lot of generations that came in its surrounding years. It received no major style changes until 2005, so any furby with this look is called a 1998 furby. In 1999 furbies were banned from the NSA as they could theoretically be used to record information. This is because furbies are an early AI based toy, using now outdated tech to have the toy respond and learn from you.

1) Red wolf furby

I want this more just for myself, though I imagine a Tord themed one could be done with it if I change my mind!

Preference: Working... Though a nonworking one would be nice to have if I didn’t plan on modifying.

2) Dragon furby

This was the first furby I set my heart on! I want one to make a Sonic the hedgehog custom with. I do not want the fresh new look version! As those ones have a black face and Sonic does not.

Preference: Open to working or nonworking

3) Racing furby

This is considered a special edition furby! Which means he would be really special! I want to modify one to be a Tom custom! I mean duh, he’s perfect for one!

Preference: I’d love a mute one for him but I doubt thats very possible to find!

4) Santa furby

like the racing furby, this one is a special edition. I want this one just to have, though I would take that dumb hat off.

Preference: nonworking so he can’t spread holiday cheer thx

1998 FURBY BABIES:

The furby babies were actually released 1999 but as stated before, because they have the original furby shape that is how they are referred to. Furby babies are smaller and hvae limited responses/interactions. They also feature more pastel colours.

1) Sunny yellow furby baby

Look, I have no clue why but the second I saw this furby I was in love. This would be one to just have and if I modified it would be to add freckles or something. I just... Look at them, theyre a little baby bird!

preference: Working

2) Pink and blue furby babies

I would either take both or just one of these duo. I think they would make pretty cute twins though.

preference: Creepy twins? Working please!

3) Lime green baby furby

I want this one to make an Invader Zim custom with... Cuz he’s baby obviously! He would be pretty heavily modified. MIGHT become a long furby.

Preference: LOUD AND PROUD WORKING MAMA

2005 FURBIES:

These furbies are probably my favorite... Likely as they’re the ones I had as a kiddo. In this generation they had their first total redesign. Features were remodeled but were arguably not as good. They did not have a light sensor and in touch relied totally on touch and sound to communicate. While they responded better to humans, among other furbies this posed a challenge.

They are also larger than the original furby, had plastic immovable feet and silicon covered mouths. For me, I remember the weird little mouth most fondly. Because the creators were going for a more realistic look, they have a permanently drugged expression. They are also supposedly pretty hard to skin and customize.

1) Strawberry swirl 2005

This is by far my favorite furby, something about them look so delicate and sweet, like someone I wanna come home and be comforted by after a bad day. This model is also more pricey than others for some reason.

Preference: Working

2) Sleepy blue 2005

Something about this furby looks so sweet, I just love him!

preference: Working

3) Sleepy pink 2005

NOW! I actually have already gotten this one, it is on its way to me through the mail. I will be turning it into a working Edd furby!

4) Charcoal 2005

I just,, Love this boy so much, look at his lil ears,, He feeds my dark soul energy

Preference: Working or nonworking I love him all the same

2005 FURBY BABY:

Now these ones are special.

Based off the 2005 furby (as it was released the same year) the 2005 furby baby had a unique look. Their legs were more defined and pose-able. I would say these are the most alien looking of all the furbies.

1) Any skinned furby 2005 baby. Any.

I want a skinned 2005 furby so I can make a Gir custom! I would be hand making the skin into a little costume! This is the only image I could find lol

Preference: I’d be fine with it not working but my world would be made if it was.

2012 FURBIES:

These furbies were basically the major tech update! At this point they are increasingly less releastic (a sharp contrast from the 2005) and more robot based. This is likely because modern tech had reach a high with children. They can develop a different personality based om how you play with it. They resemble the 1998 body shape but nothing else quite lines up. At this point, the ears are now plastic and their tail has become an interaction point.

Because these are newer models and can still be bought in some stores, I will not include my preference towards working or nonworking as most should still be active.

1) White 2012 (AKA Yeti furby)

I just love this little white fluff! He’s just super cute and soft.

2) Black cherry 2012

I want this one for a Tord custom! Though customizing 2012 and ups are difficult.

3) Festive Sweater furby BOOM

This is technically a separate model but there isn’t much a difference aside from the ears and colours. I love his metallic look though I could care less about the Christmas pattern.

FURBY CONNECT:

Furby connect is the most recent model of furby as of may 2020. It has bluetooth capabilities and the most language skills. Despite the age gap in products, all furbies can communicate with one another. This model is extremely soft and fluffy... Though it should be noted that they can be hacked into if in direct contact. To make these furbies go to sleep, they have a plastic face mask you insert into their above sensor. These are the most interactive. There LCD eyes are lit up with better graphics than the 2012 and booms.

1) Blue furby connect

I’m in love with their softness and sweet eyes. He is definitely on the top of my list!

LONG FURBIES:

Long furbies are home made furbs with (usually) authentic faces and bodies that are sewn into a long tube like thing. The practice is to actually extend the furby. These can be commissioned by artists but most people make them at home. They often have a plastic skeleton inside.

I will include one example photo THAT IS NOT MINE but the rest of the images will be the bases I want for the long furbies.

Typically it is only done with 1998 furbies.

AGAIN THIS IS NOT MY PICTURE, JUST AS NONE OF THESE ARE, BUT IT IS IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER SOMEONE HOME MADE THIS AND CREDIT IS DESERVED WHERE CREDIT IS DUE.

1) Blueberry 1998 furby base

I want to turn this into a long furby custom based of Dib from Invader Zim... I would attempt to make it a working model but if thats not possible then a simple plush would do

List of customs from character I want to make that were not listed:

Matt (eddsworld)

As of right now, these are the furbies I want! I will probably add more later... Especially since I’m not quite satisfied on my Tord choice

#furby #safe furby #iso #furby 2005 #custom furby #fandom

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zen3to5 · 4 years ago

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J/H 6-01: The Kids Are Alright

Welcome, everyone, to Zenmasters: Seasons 3 to 5+!

I was pretty set on keeping this rewrite project limited to the titular seasons when I started. The only exception, I thought, would be to possibly do a rewrite of the series finale, working on the premise that Season 7 would be the last.

Then I rewatched Season 6 - which, if you’ll recall, didn’t go down so well. So I've decided not only to do a new series finale, but to make some more adjustments along the way there. In doing so, I've set myself the following hard limits:

1. I'm only rewriting what I find to be the rough patches in Jackie and Hyde's material (otherwise, I'd be overhauling virtually every single script of this season, and no way am I going down that road.) Since I think their relationship is generally well-handled in Season 6, that means we're only looking at two areas: their make-up at the beginning of the season (which I think was sloppy) and the Pam Burkhart arc (which has virtually no Zen, when it really should have.) Adding Zen, and still acting on the premise that these could be feasible scripts for the show, there will naturally be other adjustments, but those were only made on the basis that they had to be to make room for J/H material in these 22-minute episodes.

2. I have to be able to use something from the 3 to 5 rewrites, even if it's only a single line, as a basis for adding Zen to a given episode or run of episodes.

With that out of the way - let's get started!

(And, as with 5-01, I couldn't resist imagining a new credits sequence.)

FF.Net AO3

***

We open on a unique title card, patterned after the logo from THE GODFATHER. “The Godfather Theme” by Nino Rota plays as we cut to: INT. FORMAN BEDROOM - DAY DREAM SEQUENCE. The Forman master bedroom, converted to an at-home hospital bed. RED, as Don Corleone, lies in bed, propped up on pillows. Surrounding him are BOB as Tom Hagen, KELSO as Fredo, and HYDE as Sonny. Hyde has SCHATZI in his arms. Everyone is grim-faced and the room is dark, even in the day – very Coppola. BOB: Don Forman, it is an honor and privilege to receive you in your home in the wake of the heart attack caused by your daughter’s wedding. Red rolls his eyes, unnoticed by Bob. BOB (cont’d): While you’ve been away, they locked up that Son of Sam, Al Unser took the Indy 500, and that new movie Grease is such a hoot, boy. RED: What about the Family? BOB: Well, that little dame with the mouth has been hiding down at the pool all summer, on account of these two still being after her. He points to Kelso and Hyde, who shift on their feet. HYDE: Yeah, but that’s over now. We’re sending Kelso out west to learn the nutcracker business. KELSO: Nutcracker business? Why would I - Hyde kicks him in the groin, sending him to the floor. HYDE: (laughing) Loser. He sets Schatzi on the bed and crosses to the bedroom door. As soon as he opens it, machine gunfire rips open. Hyde stumbles back into the room, being thrown about by the many bloodless squibs going off, until he falls down on top of Kelso. Bob and Red briefly glance at the bodies, then return to their conversation. BOB: And your wife, she’s working double shifts again, on account of you not being able to manage the business. KITTY, as Mama Corleone in a nurse’s hat, bursts into the room, with a laundry basket under one arm and a pot of soup under the other. She hurries over to Red, kisses him on the forehead, glances down at Hyde and Kelso, looks up to God, and runs out of the room with tears in her eyes, all while spewing a non-stop torrent of obviously fake Italian. RED: What about my son, Bob? Where’s Eric? Bob shifts on his feet, looks away. We cut to: EXT. ITALIAN VILLA – DAY A picturesque little village in the Sicilian countryside, a lovely image to have on a cheesy backdrop hanging behind the cast. ERIC, as Michael Corleone in his military uniform, and DONNA as Kay stand in the middle of the street, arms around each other’s waists. “Godfather Love Theme” by Nino Rota plays in the background. DONNA: Eric, are you sure we should be going off to college and seeing the world when your father’s heart attack and our friends’ stupidity leaves the Family vulnerable? ERIC: That’s my family, Donna. That’s not me. I’m going my own way. Besides, what’s the worst that could happen? CUT TO: EXT. CITY STREET – DAY The best New York backlot set available. Old roadsters line the street, steam comes up from the manholes, everyone goes about in hats and coats, and a fruit stand with plenty of oranges is set up on the corner. Red and Bob are at the stand, selecting oranges while Kelso waits for them by a black 1941 Ford. Shot-for-shot, the shooting of Don Corleone. A gunman steps out from behind a truck. Red notices their approach. He bolts for the car, knocking over the stand and sending oranges spilling into the street, but it’s too late. FEZ, as Sollozzo, sprays him with fire from his handgun. Slumped down against the car, Red turns around and looks up at Fez. RED: So... it was the foreigner all along. FEZ: Seriously? Have you looked around at this dream? You’re Italian, I’m Italian - we’re all foreigners, you cranky bastard! He fires off one more shot, and Red falls to the ground, dead. CUT TO: SPINNING NEWSPAPER. Headline: FORMAN SLAIN. CUT TO: EXT. ITALIAN VILLA - DAY Eric, clutching at the newspaper, with Donna reading over his shoulder. Eric crushes the paper in one hand, bites the knuckles of the other. ERIC: Oh, Pop. If only I had set aside all my own personal hopes and dreams for my life and stayed at home. If only I hadn’t gone against the Family. He throws his head to the sky in true melodramatic fashion as we crane up. ERIC: Why? Why? WHY? CUT TO: INT. DONNA’S BEDROOM – DAY Late morning. The window curtains are drawn, letting in the sunlight, and Jackie’s cot is empty. Eric and Donna are snuggled together in Donna’s bed, still asleep. Eric stirs, jolts straight up. He takes in where he is, lets out a long sigh. Donna, still groggy from sleep, sits up and puts a hand on his shoulder. DONNA: Eric, is everything all right? ERIC: (beat) Yeah. Eric pats her hand and slides out of bed. He starts to get dressed. ERIC (cont’d): I gotta go. My folks come home from the hospital today. Hyde and I are picking them up. Donna’s closet opens. Out steps Fez, all smiles. FEZ: Mr. Red is coming home? Eric jumps and Donna pulls the covers up to her chin. ERIC: Fez? DONNA: Oh, my God! Did you see anything? FEZ: Not much. You should really think about a night light. Donna and Eric both take pillows from the bed and chuck them at Fez, who retreats back into the closet.

MAIN TITLES INT. VISTA CRUISER – NIGHT A) The gang out on the road. Eric drives, with Donna next to him and Hyde in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits Jackie, then Fez, then Kelso. THEME SONG: Hangin’ out... B) Hyde drives, with Eric in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits Donna, and behind Hyde sits Jackie. The girls are leaning forward in their seats, their arms wrapped around the boys’ shoulders. THEME SONG: Down the street... C) Kelso drives, with Fez next to him and Hyde in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits a scowling Red, then Eric, then Bob. THEME SONG: The same old thing... D) Red drives, with Kitty in the passenger’s seat, holding Schatzi. Bob sits in the middle of the back seat, hands behind his head. THEME SONG: We did last week... E) Fez drives, with Donna next to him and Kelso in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits Eric, then Hyde, then Jackie. Donna leans into Fez as the gang sing along. THEME SONG: Not a thing to do... F) Jackie drives, with Donna next to her and Kitty in the passenger’s seat. THEME SONG: But talk to you... G) Hyde drives, with Eric in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits Donna, and behind Hyde sits Jackie. The girls are leaning forward in their seats, their arms wrapped around the boys’ shoulders. THEME SONG: We’re all alright! H) Eric drives, with Donna next to him and Hyde in the passenger’s seat. Behind him sits Jackie, then Fez, then Kelso. THEME SONG: We’re all alright! I) The creators’ license plate, a 1978 sticker in the corner. HYDE (v.o.): Hello, Wisconsin! BUMPER INT. FORMAN KITCHEN - DAY Shortly after the pre-credits scene. Hyde sits at the kitchen table, a plate of eggs and bacon in front of him. He has Schatzi in his arms, cuddled close to his face. He picks up a piece of bacon and holds it up for Schatzi to eat. Eric, Donna (dressed in a bathing suit and dress) and Fez enter through the patio door. They freeze when they see Hyde, and he freezes when he sees them, causing Schatzi to strain to reach the bacon. Though all three struggle not to laugh, Donna finds her voice first: DONNA: (to Hyde) Are you feeding and cuddling with a wiener dog? HYDE: Are you planning to wear a bathing suit to a hospital visit? ERIC: (to Donna) Oh, please do. FEZ: Yes, please. Donna shakes her head and rolls her eyes. DONNA: I’m going to the pool with Jackie. HYDE: She choose between me and Kelso yet? DONNA: I don’t know. But Kelso’s been going down there to show off for her. He’s got a speedo with the Point Place Police Department badge printed on the ass. It’s really disturbing. Hyde pushes himself to his feet, Schatzi still in his arms. HYDE: Whatever, man. She thinks I’m gonna wait around all summer ‘cause she can’t choose between me and a guy who once forgot he was allergic to eggs? His head swelled up to five times its normal size. Screw that, man. I’m over her. Schatzi chooses this time to lick the corner of Hyde’s mouth. Eric chuckles, crosses to Hyde and puts a hand on his shoulder. ERIC: Hyde, the other day I was down in the basement and went to put on Zeppelin, and I found country music records hidden in the sleeve to Physical Graffiti. You’re not over her. Fez smirks, crosses to them. FEZ: (to Hyde) So, you console your loneliness with doggie kisses and country songs, while I am married to Eric’s slutty sister. HYDE: Yeah, how’s that going? FEZ: Oh, not great. But I’m pretty sure when she gets back from our honeymoon in Cancun, things will pick up. ERIC: Laurie went on your honeymoon alone? FEZ: Oh, no, that would be crazy. She took her friend Carlos along to keep an eye on her. But I paid for both of them, so everyone know who the man is in this deal. Eric, Donna, and Hyde all share a look. ERIC: (to Hyde) All right, let’s get going. (to Fez) You stay here. My dad doesn’t want you anywhere near the hospital. FEZ: Why not? I’m family. I want to support my new American dad after his heart attack. ERIC: Fez, you’re the one who gave him the heart attack. HYDE: By marrying his daughter, who’s on your honeymoon with another guy. FEZ: Oh, no, no, no. Carlos is just like, um... he’s kind of like a – a chaperone. He, uh... (beat) Son of a bitch! He stomps his foot and pouts, even as Hyde presses Schatzi into his arms. Eric, Hyde, and Donna file out the door. BUMPER INT. HOSPITAL - DAY A reception desk at the hospital. A DOCTOR leads Eric, Red, Kitty, and Hyde up the hallway. Red is in decent shape and rotten mood; same as always, really. RED: Come on, Kitty. Let’s get the hell out of this weird place. I think some of these nurses are stealing drugs. The doctor gives Kitty a look. KITTY: Red, I am a nurse here. (laughs) RED: I stand by my statement. DOCTOR: Okay, Mr. Forman, just to be clear: no going to work, no chores, no driving for three months. And let’s not forget the root cause of the problem. ERIC: Too much rage, right? Yeah, so he probably shouldn’t, like, yell at anyone anymore, right? DOCTOR: Actually, the reason he ran into trouble is he was holding stuff in. ERIC: (beat) He was holding stuff in? Okay, I weigh 42 pounds ‘cause of what he let out and – I’m sorry – you’re telling me that, uh, there’s more in there? Kitty hurries between her husband and son and takes both their arms. KITTY: (to doctor) No, no, no. He does not weigh 42 pounds. And these two are the best of buddies! (doing Eric) “Hey, Dad, wanna go fishing?” (doing Red) “Sure, son. Let’s hug.” (normal voice) That’s what it’s like at our house! (laughs) RED: (to doctor) See what I mean about the drugs? DOCTOR: (to Red) What you need to do is focus on things that make you happy. ERIC: Okay, but I don’t know where we’re gonna find a boatload of dead commies. HYDE: (points to Eric, himself) Yeah, but there’s two asses he loves sticking his foot up right here. Eric nods. Red gives him and Hyde an appraising look as Kitty shakes her head. CUT TO: EXT. POOL - DAY The Point Place public pool, a small and tidy swimming hole surrounded by a chain-link fence. Donna and JACKIE, in a tiny bikini and skirt, sip sodas at a small cable in the corner. DONNA: Jackie, the summer’s almost over and you haven’t decided between Kelso and Hyde yet. JACKIE: Why should I rush for them? The sun is out, the air is warm, I’m almost at my most delicious shade of cocoa brown – let that two-timing moron and paranoid hophead wait it out a little longer. DONNA: Well, Hyde might be done waiting, so you may not have a choice anymore. Jackie takes her sunglasses off and leans in toward Donna. JACKIE: What do you mean? Before Donna can answer, a shadow blocks their sun. It’s Kelso, fresh from the pool, dripping wet in his PPPD speedo. KELSO: Ladies. Ladies’ bodies. (to Jackie) So, Jackie, what do you think? He flexes, pushes up his shoulders. KELSO (cont’d): Yep. Police Academy starts in a week. All this swimming’s getting me into shape. DONNA: Wouldn’t getting into shape for the police academy mean eating donuts and growing a bad moustache? KELSO: Oh, I’m growing the bad moustache. Jackie rolls her eyes, looks around Kelso to Donna. JACKIE: So is Mr. Forman home yet? DONNA: Eric’s picking him up now. I don’t know what they’re gonna do once we’re in Madison. Kitty and Hyde are both working double shifts, but that still doesn’t cover the lost income from Red not working. JACKIE: Yeah... and what about medical bills? Price Mart offers terrible coverage, and you can forget about any help from the government now that health reform’s stalled. DONNA: I know, right? KELSO: Wait, hold up. (to Donna) You said a bunch of sad stuff... (to Jackie) You followed up with some money and health fact stuff... (to Donna) And you said “I know,” which makes me think Jackie used that right, which makes me think she knew what she was talking about. DONNA: Very good, Kelso. That’s what we call a “conversation.” KELSO: Well, I know some facts too. Jimmy Carter? He had a peanut farm. And the Dairy Queen down the street is selling half-off peanut buster parfaits today. Now, excuse me as I walk down there to get one – without pants. He turns his ass Jackie’s way before strolling off. The girls shake their heads. CUT TO: INT. FORMAN KITCHEN – DAY Welcome home, Red! The family file in through the patio door. Kitty keeps her arms ready to support Red, who looks done with this day already. KITTY: (to Red) Now, let’s get you upstairs for your nap. (to Eric, Hyde) And boys, he needs quiet, so no shenanigans. ERIC: Mom, please, we haven’t shenaniganed in about six years. HYDE: We’ve hooliganed. ERIC: We’ve no-goodniked. HYDE: We’ve ne’er done well. ERIC: And just last week, we found ourselves rabble-rousing. RED: Will you shut up? Eric and Hyde, both laughing, step aside so that Red can go through the door to the living room... INT. FORMAN LIVING ROOM – DAY And find Fez standing in front of his chair with a balloon and flowers. FEZ: Welcome home, Dad! RED: You. You’ve got a lot of nerve, showing your face around here after what you did to my daughter! He slowly advances on Fez, who somehow just doesn’t get the danger he’s in. FEZ: Hey, I did you a favor. That girl’s been passed around this town - KITTY/ERIC/HYDE: NO! Eric and Hyde pull Red back as Kitty rushes over to Fez and takes him by the shoulders. KITTY: Okay. You’ve already given him one heart attack. That’s enough. Now hush. She gently pushes a pouting Fez down to the couch. Eric crosses to the coffee table and grabs a small bowl full of candy. ERIC: (to Fez) Hey, look, buddy – raisinets! Instantly happy once more, Fez takes the candy and chows down. Kitty hurries back over to Red and leads him to the stairs. KITTY: (to Red) Okay, okay. Naptime. She sees him halfway up the staircase, then lets him go the rest of the way on his own as she leans over the railing. KITTY (cont’d): Oh, and Steven, he has a check-up next week during my shift, so I need you to take him. HYDE: Mrs. Forman, I told you, I’m working then. KITTY: Oh, that’s right. Eric, could you - ERIC: No, Mom. I’m not gonna be here, remember? I’m moving away. KITTY: (beat) Oh, so you’re still going? ERIC: Yes, I’m still going. It’s college. I have to register for classes. KITTY: Fine. ERIC: Mom, I gotta get out of here. KITTY: (short) Fine! ERIC: Great. KITTY: Great! ERIC: Fine! Kitty turns away and heads up the stairs. Eric scoffs, points after her and looks to Hyde, “can you believe that?” Hyde offers a shrug, “what can you do?” The front door opens. In walks LAURIE, suitcase in hand. She sets it down by the couch and crosses to the boys. LAURIE: (to Eric) Hey, little brother. (to Hyde) Hey, orphan. (to Fez) Hey, hubby. Fez stands. FEZ: Don’t “hubby” me! I’m mad at you. LAURIE: Aww. But I brought you a souvenir. She pulls a crystal shot glass from her purse and presents it to Fez. ERIC: Oh, look, Fez, a genuine Cancun shot glass still sticky with tequila. FEZ: (to Laurie) Aww, you shouldn’t have. LAURIE: No biggie. Some guy left it in my room. She struts her way into the kitchen. CUT TO: INT. HUB - EVENING A modest evening. “You Don’t Own Me” by Lesley Gore plays on the jukebox. At a center table, Jackie sits alone, reading a newspaper. Kelso, in a leather jacket and a PPPD T-shirt, enters, struts over to her table and leans on the back of an empty chair. Jackie barely glances over her paper to look at him, which Kelso takes for her checking him out. KELSO: Yep. Just picked up the shirt today. It’s a tight fit, so it really shows off all that swimming I’ve been doing. He makes a show of sliding his jacket off and showing his arms before sitting down. Only then does he notice what Jackie’s up to. KELSO (cont’d): Are you reading a newspaper? JACKIE: Yeah. KELSO: Are you reading the news part of a newspaper? Jackie raises her eyebrows at him. JACKIE: That is where the news is, Michael. KELSO: Yeah, but since when do you read it? JACKIE: Since I decided to keep up with interesting things going on in the world. She disappears back behind her paper. Kelso’s eyes dart back and forth; he’s not used to this from Jackie. He snatches one of the other sections from the table and struggles to get it open and propped up before him in imitation of her. KELSO: Well, here’s something interesting – Snoopy is playing in a tennis tournament. Jackie lets out a long breath, refusing to meet Kelso’s stare and smirk. FADE TO BLACK COMMERCIAL BUMPER INT. FORMAN KITCHEN – DAY The next morning. Kitty is at the stovetop in her somewhat untidy nurse’s uniform, hastily putting together breakfast plates – one with eggs and bacon, one with eggs and pancakes, and one with egg whites and lean ham. Hyde enters through the patio door in his half-open chef’s jacket, a small pharmacy bag in hand. He drops more than sets it on the counter. HYDE: Here’s Red’s heart medication, Mrs. Forman. He lets out a big yawn. Kitty presses a cup of coffee into his hands. He nods in appreciation, takes out a wad of bills from his pants pocket, and throws it on the stovetop. Kitty takes it and pockets it. KITTY: Thank you, honey. And I’ll get this money put into your savings account on my way home. HYDE: Mrs. Forman, I’ve told you I don’t need a savings account. Just pay a bill. Of course, this is the moment when Eric walks in from the living room. ERIC: “Pay a bill?” (to Kitty) Mom, what does he mean? Is money that tight? KITTY: It’s nothing. ERIC: No, ‘cause... I mean, Donna and I are both working, so if you need to take a little out of my college fund - KITTY: Listen, both of you – the money in those accounts is for you. Don’t worry. We’ll be fine. She takes the pancake plate and passes it to Eric. KITTY (cont’d): You just eat your breakfast. Eric examines his plate. ERIC: Chocolate-chip caramel whipped cream pancakes? Mom, you’re not gonna bribe me into staying home from school with super sweet breakfast food. (checks the plate) And where are the sprinkles? KITTY: No, no, the pancakes are an apology. I overreacted before. Of course, you have to go to school. ERIC: So... that’s it? No guilt? KITTY: That’s right. Now, I’m late for work. (to Hyde) I’ll pick up the dry cleaning and drop off the packages at the post office. You make sure Red eats his breakfast, and only his breakfast – egg whites and heart-healthy ham. Oh, and remember you promised to give Schatzi his bath. She pats Hyde’s cheek and hurries out the door. Hyde looks down at the plate meant for Red, pointedly avoiding Eric’s smirk. ERIC: Now you’re bathing our wiener dog? HYDE: (beat) He keeps coming down to the basement. His fur-stink’s become incriminating evidence. Red enters from the living room. Eric crosses to the kitchen table as Hyde presses Red’s breakfast into his hands. HYDE (cont’d): Here you go, Red. Red looks down at his meal. RED: Where’s the yellow part of these eggs? That’s the baby bird. That’s the part I want to eat. Hyde crosses his arms and shakes his head, while Eric chuckles and digs into his breakfast. CUT TO: INT. HUB – DAY On a slow afternoon, Donna and Jackie enjoy lunch at a center table. DONNA: Wow, Jackie. You’ve really been showing Kelso the cold shoulder. JACKIE: Well, he deserves it. I told him I needed the summer to think things over, and he’s been after me the whole time. DONNA: I guess that means you choose Hyde. JACKIE: No! I told him I needed the summer to think things over, and he hasn’t spoken to me that whole time! I am so over them both. Kelso enters, still in his police shirt and jacket. He strolls over to the girls’ table, grabs at the badge logo printed on his shirt, and stretches it out as if it were a real badge. KELSO: Ladies. You have the right to remain foxy. Donna shakes her head. Jackie rolls her eyes, stands, and pushes past Kelso on her way out the door. CUT TO: INT. FORMAN BASEMENT – NIGHT That night. Donna and Eric sit close on the couch, going through college materials. ERIC: Oh, my God, Donna. Madison has a course called “The Social Significance of Jedi Culture.” He makes a show of gaping in delight as Donna rolls her eyes. Kitty, still in nurse’s uniform, comes down the stairs with an entry laundry basket. She crosses to the dryer and begins unloading it. ERIC (cont’d): Mom, why are you doing laundry? It’s almost midnight. KITTY: Well, with the double shift, this is the only time I have to do it. Eric sighs. He sets down the brochure and stands. ERIC: Okay, don’t do this. KITTY: Do what? ERIC: Come down here in the middle of the night, doing laundry, looking like hell - KITTY: Oh, excuse me! ERIC: No, I – I’m just saying, you’re trying to make me feel guilty for not leaving, and it’s not gonna work. I can’t stay here, okay? I have to go off and live my life. I deserve that! Mom, I deserve a chance! KITTY: Okay, okay. No need to use your squeaky voice. I understand that you have to leave. I have bigger things to worry about than making you feel guilty. She gathers up the laundry and heads back up the stairs. Donna looks up at Eric, who looks after his mom. DONNA: Eric, if you feel like you need to stay... I mean, we can talk about - ERIC: No! No. He sits back down. ERIC (cont’d): We’re leaving next week and that’s final. DONNA: Okay. They no sooner turn back to the brochure than the basement door opens and Red steps in, wearing pajamas and bathrobe. He has a plate in his hands, with toast that he dips into very runny egg yolks. RED: (to Eric) Yeah. It’s egg yolks. And I don’t care if you tell your mother. She doesn’t scare me. KITTY (v.o.): Eric, I almost forgot... Red tosses the toast aside, drops the plate, and high tails it back up the outside stairwell. CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY – DAY The next day. The upstairs hall of the Pinciotti house. Kelso strolls up to Donna and Jackie’s bedroom door. He’s about to knock when he notices the sounds coming from inside – “Babe I’m Gonna Leave You” by Led Zeppelin, and sniffling. Quietly, he opens the door, and we cut to: INT. DONNA’S BEDROOM - DAY Kelso finds Jackie curled up on the end of her cot. Her arms and legs are wrapped around a pillow stuffed inside a black Led Zeppelin T-shirt, and a tissue is in her hands. Tears are in her eyes. Kelso slowly crosses over to Donna’s bed. He points to the record player. KELSO: That’s Zeppelin. (points to pillow) That’s a Zeppelin shirt. That’s Hyde’s Zeppelin shirt, his favorite one. I know ‘cause one time I tried to use it to clean out a paintbrush. He kicked my ass, stole my shirt, and made me use it instead. A fresh sob wells up from Jackie’s throat. She turns around so her back is to Kelso. KELSO (cont’d): You still love him, don’t you? There was never really a choice, was there? JACKIE: What do you want, Michael? KELSO: (beat) Nothing. Look, Jackie... (sits) I know I’ve been with a lot of girls, but you’re the only real serious girlfriend I’ve ever had, and you’ll always be special to me. When I found out you and Hyde were together, I couldn’t believe I’d really lost you for good. And all I could think about was getting you back. But seeing you this summer... I mean, after being with Hyde, and then on your own, you’ve changed. You’re more thoughtful, more well-read – I think you’ve become a complicated woman. And I don’t want none of that. Jackie turns around just enough to glare at Kelso. KELSO (cont’d): But I think Hyde still does. And you obviously want him. And you should, because you two were good for each other. Not like us. So... so you don’t have to worry about me chasing you anymore. Jackie turns all the way around. JACKIE: Michael, do you mean that? KELSO: Yeah. I release you. He holds his hands out in front of him and mimes a bird’s wings flapping. KELSO (cont’d): Fly, little bird. Fly, fly away! He spreads his hands out, looks up, and makes a noise that sounds something like an object getting caught in a ceiling fan. KELSO (cont’d): (to Jackie) That was you. Jackie offers a weak chuckle and dabs at her eyes. CUT TO: INT. FORMAN BASEMENT - NIGHT Later that night. Eric and Donna are on the couch again, watching TV. The basement door flies open and Hyde staggers in. His clothes are dirty and torn, there are bite marks on his arm and claw scrapes on his shirt, and Schatzi shakes in his arms. Eric and Donna both stand. DONNA: What the hell happened? HYDE: I was taking Schatzi for a walk, and we got to the corner, and you know the Anderson house there, with the Great Dane? He got out of the yard. ERIC: Oh, my God. He went for Schatzi? HYDE: No, he went for me. Schatzi bit the bastard in the groin and then tore his ear and sent him running. It was so badass. Hyde sets Schatzi down. He struggles to stand back up straight. ERIC: Man, are you okay? HYDE: I’m fine. I’ve gotta get ready for my shift, but before that, I need to find that doggie thyroid crap for your little wiener dog. DONNA: What is with you and animals now? When did you get so knowledgeable on pet care? HYDE: I got roped into helping with the cat when me and Jackie were... He trails off; he can’t finish the thought. He drops down into the lawn chair and stairs blankly down at the coffee table. DONNA: You’re not over her, are you? Hyde doesn’t answer. ERIC: You still love her, don’t you? (to Donna) Look at him. So choked up he can’t even speak. Hyde’s throat pulses. He tugs at the top of his T-shirt. DONNA: More like he can’t even swallow. Hyde points to her, “bingo.” DONNA (cont’d): Okay... Hyde, we’ll take care of Schatzi’s thyroid. Why don’t you go take care of the rabies shot? Hyde points again, nods, and scrambles to his feet and back out the door. He’s no sooner gone than Kitty comes downstairs with another empty laundry basket. She goes straight to the dryer and unloads it. ERIC: Mom, you’re still behind on laundry? KITTY: Oh, I sat down just to rest my feet for a few minutes when I got home and – and before you know it, I... (checks watch) Oh, God, I’m late for work. ERIC: You’re working tonight? (points to door) Hyde’s working tonight? You both worked during the day. KITTY: Well, honey, nights can be our busiest time. Steven makes people a big, salty dinner, and then they come my way. (laughs) Now, there’s food in the... oh, who am I kidding? There’s no food! She hands Eric the laundry basket and scrambles back up the stairs. Eric walks over to the deep freeze. He sets the laundry down on it, leans against the basket. He whirls around to face Donna. ERIC: They can’t do this to me. They cannot do this to me. I gotta get out of here. Of all the people in the history of the world that have ever had to get anywhere, it is me having to get the hell out of here! I have to go! (beat) I have to stay. He drops down onto the couch. ERIC (cont’d): Donna, I’m sorry. Donna sits next to him. DONNA: Sorry? Eric, I think it’s amazing that you’d do that for your family. They kiss. DONNA (cont’d): And, you know, we’ll see each other on weekends. ERIC: Oh, so you’re still going? DONNA: Well... yeah, I mean... yeah. ERIC: Yeah. No. Of course. DONNA: Oh, come on. I think I know something that might make you feel better. She leans in to kiss him again. Before she can get things going, though, Eric puts a hand on her knee. ERIC: Hey, um... can we just, like... could we just sit for a while? DONNA: Yeah, sure. She scoots in closer to him. He moves his hand up to her arm, and puts his other arm around her shoulders. They lean their heads against each other and look down at their college brochures on the coffee table. FADE TO BLACK CREDITS EXT. STAIRWELL – NIGHT Another night. Eric and Donna descend the stairwell. They pause when they hear “Baby Don’t Get Hooked on Me” by Mac Davis coming from behind the door. ERIC: Uh-oh. Country. Hyde’s sad music. Hesitating, Donna opens the door. A wall of smoke rushes out to meet them, as we cut to: INT. FORMAN BASEMENT – NIGHT Eric and Donna step into a basement full of diffuse smoke. Hyde sits in his chair with Schatzi in his arms. He’s cackling like a loon, slapping at his knee and swaying in his seat. Snacks of all kinds litter the coffee table. HYDE: (through laughter) Hey, Forman! He waves. Eric and Donna give reluctant waves back. ERIC: So, Hyde... how’s it going, buddy? HYDE: (laughing) I’m freakin’ miserable, man! A fresh wave of laughter comes on as he swipes a piece of salami from the coffee table and holds it up for Schatzi. END.

#z's fics #that 70s show #zenmasters #jackie x hyde #zen3to5+#fan fiction #fan script

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