#obv nothing quite like what happened to him happened to me (this is a spoiler free vent post thank you) but still
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finished how not to die alone by richard roper and I have Thoughts but all of them put me on the verge of tears
#the way I understood andrew perfectly. the weight of a lie that has snowballed and the grief behind it#obv nothing quite like what happened to him happened to me (this is a spoiler free vent post thank you) but still#that one line in the beginning still fucking haunts me#it was like#''after a long day andrew sits in his dark room and talks to his friends on the forum. this is everything he was waiting for.''#''this is everything.''#(obv written better but i can only fit so much in a tag)#THE DOUBLE MEANING BEHIND THAT#he is content and relaxed to be home and alone and able to indulge in his interests. but that is all he has#im going to fucking vomit#that book caught me off guard so many times and each one felt like i was being killed#richard roper. shaking you and shaking you and shaking you#i said spoiler free so it will remain spoiler free#but something about andrew's anxiety and regret and absolutely fucking horrendously suppressed grief hits way too close to home#the subtle signs of autism and the even subtler signs of repressed trauma beneath that. fucking christ#books with messages like this always make me nervous though#(the message being something akin to ''just do it'' and ''the longer you wait the more time you're wasting'')#and like. yes the message has good intentions but im a fucked up 20 year old who gets EXPONENTIALLY more suicidal#when i begin to think that i will be left behind because i adjust too slowly for everything else#haha! crying now#will abandon these tags post haste#anyway i liked it a lot. 9/10
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you're safe now.
word count: 878
content warnings: mentions & descriptions of injury
summary: the aftermath of a mission gone... not so right.
author's notes: taking a small break from ocs. just for a little through don't get used to it đ alsoooo obv i can't control how peope interpret my work but just keep in mind i didn't write this with a romantic ship in mind đ«¶
contains mild spoilers for dan heng's lore
âYou should be more careful,â Dan Heng says, sitting next to Stelle on the edge of her bed with a first aid kit. She rolls her eyes, and he lets out a heavy sigh. âYou know I'm right.â
âI'm always careful,â she replies, almost annoyed, and he raises his eyebrows but doesn't say anything to that. Instead he simply moves a bit closer. Stelle has already taken off her hoodie, making it easier for him to access a fairly big cut on her arm; it's unfortunately not the only injury she came back with from the mission, but the most serious one - from what Dan Heng could see - and it makes him a bit relieved that there's nothing more serious or harder to treat.Â
âShow me,â he asks, and she pulls away the now bloodied piece of cloth she was pressing against the wound. The Vidyadhara takes a moment to look at the cut, before he proceeds to clean it; he doesn't hesitate with his movements, but he's also gentle, careful not to cause Stelle more pain.Â
He finishes cleaning the excess blood and bits of dirt that got into the cut, and turns away for a moment to grab the disinfectant.
âIt might sting a little,â he warns, but when the only reaction he gets from Stelle is a nod, he realizes that something is not quite right.
There's no snarky or slightly unhinged remark, just silence; she has been awfully quiet for the past few minutes, and if that wasn't enough Dan Heng also notices her face looks pale, and his eyebrows furrow slightly.
âAre you alright?â he asks.
âYeah?â She looks back at him, seemingly slightly surprised by the question.
âNot feeling faint or anything like that? You look pale.â He doesn't let it show in his voice, but there's concern starting to grow inside him. What if her injuries are worse than what he initially thought? What if there is some more serious wound that she has been hiding from him up until now? Or what if the Stellaron decided to sabotage her body again and sheâs feeling sick?Â
He goes on to disinfect the wound carefully, trying to make it seem like everything's fine. It's better not to freak Stelle out⊠Or give her a reason to tease him again.
She does neither of that, though.
âDo I?â she just asks, and then shakes her head. âNo, I'm fine. Don't worry about it.â
There's a âbutâ, he can sense it, but it doesn't seem like she's going to continue, and Dan Heng isn't sure how to make her talk. It's painfully obvious to him that there is something weighing on her mind, but he doesn't know how to approach it. He sighs quietly; sometimes, just sometimes, he wishes the Vidyadhara powers included mind reading - that way, maybe he could make some use of them.
As he reaches for the bandages, though, he suddenly realizes something.
He remembers how he found Stelle - in a dead end, backed into a wall, bloodied and dirty and clearly exhausted, trying to ward off three monsters at once. He remembers the look on her face; it was determination, but also fear, and it turned into relief only after she finally spotted him.
When he begins wrapping the bandage around her arm he asks yet another question, but this time his voice is softer.
âStill thinking about what happened?âÂ
He has to wait a few seconds for a response; once again, it's a nod.
âYeah,â she admits, her voice similarly quiet. She's silent for a bit more, as if she was thinking about whether she really should say anything more. â...Sorry,â she finally adds. âYou're right. I should be more careful, if I was thenââ
âStelle,â he interrupts her. She looks up at him, and their eyes meet. âDo you think I'm angry at you?â
âMaybe?â she laughs, but he notices her eyes are a bit more glossy than usual.Â
âThen you should know that I'm not,â he says. He finishes bandaging her arm and gently takes her hands to examine them; thankfully, there seem to be no injuries there. âI might get annoyed, but I'm not actually angry, okay?â he asks.
âBut⊠I don't know,â she says. âItâs just⊠It was scary? I don't know.â Her eyes wander back down, to the ground, and the look on Dan Heng's face softens. âIf you didn't show upâŠâ
âI know,â he replies. It's⊠Oddly painful to see Stelle like this, so unlike herself. This entire thing seems to have affected her more than he initially thought, and it makes him feel guilty for not noticing it sooner. At the same time, he feels odd being the one to comfort her right now - March is definitely way better at this than him - but⊠He supposes that this one time, he won't mind. But that obviously means he can't leave her with only two words, so he speaks again.Â
âI can imagine this was quite scary, but it's done now, right?â he adds. âYou're here, and you're safe, and that's the most important thing.â
She's quiet for a moment, but, eventually, she nods.
â...Right,â she says, and he's glad to see than when she smiles this time, it doesn't look forced anymore.Â
#angstpril2024#honkai star rail#fanfiction#day11#no way out#hsr#stelle#dan heng#tw injury#dim writing âïž
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Me coming to your inbox to ask about your horror comics like
FUCK YEAH!!!
ok pov you see me, in need of some good sustenance during the tmagp hiatus, in a unbecoming fit of nostalgia, i redownload webtoon.
webtoon reminds me of the days when things were simpler, when i didn't know what arc sin was let alone the fact that i would have to be able to draw it one day. but i've changed since then, the cutesy romances i was super into don't interest me as much anymore so what do i do? i start in the horror/thriller section.
ok so there are 3 that have gripped my brain and refuse to let go
(major spoilers obvs, tw for mentions of rape, sexual assault, violence, mental health issues, mental hospitals)
Silent Screams:
oh my GOD
this was nothing like i thought this would be
like the description thingy was giving finding a way out of being kidnapped vibes
but in reality it was SO MUCH DEEPER THAN THAT
i didn't realise it would be set in like the 19th century, so that was another cool thing as well
basically there's this guy named theo
he has really bad anger issues and he's super attached to his mum (âšmommy issuesâš)
we find out that his mum got raped when she was 14 and had theo as a result, so they spent most of their lives struggling to get by
on top of that, the mum has some kind of chronic illness
theo is insanely protective of his mum and suspicious of men, he regularly gets into fights, especially with his mum's best friend who he doesn't trust
then his mum meets and falls in love with a doctor, who seems to be quite sweet, little bit nervous, like his feelings for her are genuine
but it's clear that my bro has other stuff going on, he's got an assistant guy who keeps reminding him to "stay on task" etc etc
(it feels very manipulative, like the line between master and assistant has been blurred, the doctor thinks he's in charge and calling the shots but the assistant is subtly manipulating him to do what he wants while letting the doctor think he is still in charge)
but yeah, they get married and theo and his mum is shipped off to a wonderful new wealthy lifestyle
but theo hates this guy, he knows that he's making his mum happy for now but he just doesn't trust it, especially the fact that he's also the mum's doctor, he already has a lot of power over her
also the doctor makes it clear that theo's attitude must be improved, to fit into their new high society life
so we open with the day before theo's 19th birthday
he's scared away yet another tutor due to his bad attitude (even though he technically is getting high marks)
and his step dad (who he is forced to call father) is not happy with him
it's clear from the get go that the doctor HATES theo, this is very much not a good relationship and theo hates the doctor as well
the doctor thinks theo's attitude is hurting the mum, theo thinks the doctor is putting too much pressure on him and is causing a rift between him and his mum (again, mommy issues)
anyway, the doctor tells theo that the mum had gone to town for a day, which theo finds highly suspicious cause like 1. she's ill how would she do that by herself and 2. she wouldn't leave the day before theo's birthday
the next day, the mum still hasn't returned, theo is obviously devastated
the maid attempts to cheer him up, which sort of works before she goes to the doctor's study to clean
what does she find in the doctor's study? a secret passage way.
what happens to her directly after she finds said secret passage way? she is hit over the head with a lamp and killed
theo comes running to find the maid dead and also (say it with me folks) gets hit over the head with a lamp
but not killed
he wakes up chained to like a prison cell in the basement
he is not doing well
but at least he was right! the doctor was evil!
so theo finds out that his mum is dead and the doctor has something to do with that death
but also that the doctor blames theo for the mum's death
(we find out later that the doctor accidentally gives the mum the wrong dose of medicine, so she passes out and hits her head, bleeding to death. the assistant encourages him to blame theo cause theo and the doctor had had an argument beforehand, which must've caused him to be distracted right)
then, theo wakes up to find his vocal chords have been cut - he cannot scream or make any noise
he is terrified, but he realises that the doctor sort of does have some weird freudian attachment to him because theo looks so much like the mum
so every night he whistles the tune that his mum used to play and the doctor sits in front of the cage and listens
one day he goes to wake up theo but can't so he panics and does what?
kisses him
HUH??? i hear you say. WHAT? and i agree
he then nearly sexually assaults him, until he flashes back to his own dad sexually assaulting him and is like OH WHAT THE FUCK WAS I ABOUT TO DO
(freud would have a FIELD DAY)
and then the assistant is like bro what about our work stop being weird about ur stepson
and then he's like oh yeah
so he sedates theo and then gives him a lobotomy
however, theo wakes up midway through the surgery, so it doesn't work
it turns out they wanted to make a human puppet that they could experiment on for medical reasons
as it happens, theo is normal for some of the time, but other times turns into a mindless puppet
the doctor is very annoyed and goes back to blaming him for the mum's death
and thus, ships him off to a mental hospital.
and that's where i got up to so far
#do you get it#do you see why i am brainrotting over it#it is so twisted and messed up#but in such an addictive way#i just#AHHHH#i'll tell you about the rest in a different post cause this was way longer than i thought it would be#hehe#thanks for asking <3333#love u forever#answered asks#horror comics
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same anon who is fretting left and right abt r and s and everyone else ;_; i love having ur insight and thank u kindly for the long answerâŠ. exactly what i wanted *evil laughter* but i have a follow up!
this might be too far into spoiler territory thoâŠ. another Painful element of this beautiful fic is the lack of love between s and j itâs KILLING MEEEE (as always in the best way) not seeing them as they usually are⊠will we ever get any s+j friendship crumbs? or is this just not possible within the world youâve created? i trust ur Vision either way iâm just gnawing at the bars of my prison cell thinking about the possibilitiesâŠ..
hmmm yeah i feel like i canât really talk abt like. whatâs going 2 happen w them without getting too spoilery (although my usual likeâŠwip policy applies here lol if you absolutely want them 2 be friends stop reading if u absolutely donât want them 2 be friends stop reading be ready 4 it 2 go either way etc) but! i can talk a bit abt like. how james currently feels where weâre at in the fic & how his feelings have changed
what i've been trying 2 do w j + s in this fic is like. well clearly they hated each other at the beginning bc s sees this arrogant pigheaded order soldier whereas j sees this entitled foolish d.e. & that starting animosity is pretty intense, although it's a bit more personal 4 s--j is like. one of the first order members he's knowingly met + becomes kind of his warden in a way so he pretty specifically hates j whereas for j s is just one of many d.e. he's encountered before so he doesn't really hold a grudge in the same way once they start working together, although he also isn't quick 2 trust s bc unlike his brother s didn't join the order of his own accord (obv. reg didn't exactly join of his own accord, either, but that's pretty much how j sees it).
so when they do actually start working together j is like. well this guy's gotta prove himself if he wants me 2 trust him but once s does start proving himself he's pretty willing 2 put the old animosity aside, and he views s as part of their team--hence him risking his life 2 go back & save s, etc. s, on the other hand, is holding a personal grudge & specifically does not like j so even when j starts acting a bit friendlier towards him he's still like. hmph. bc while j is like "oh holding u prisoner was nothing personal obviously it was just what we had 2 do 4 the order" for s it was very much personal! lol
anyway despite the grudge etc. they do both mutually begin 2 realize that they have certain key similarities--specifically, the fact that they both feel responsible for the people they care about & would do pretty much anything 2 protect them, even if it's something those people wouldn't want them to do. so when we reach this point where they need 2 break into the dept. of mysteries, they both end up reaching the same conclusion abt how they're going 2 have 2 do that, and realizing that they've both reached that same conclusion kind of bolsters that mutual respect they're developing 4 each other. so there's sort of this truce struck while they're planning s's obliviation, where they still aren't friends exactly & probably wouldn't go so far as 2 say they like each other, but they're also like...the only people who can kind of understand what the other one is going thru + sacrificing (as in the convo in the james pov where s says 'they're all gonna hate us,' etc), and in a way it's nice 2 have someone who understands u in a way the others can't...also s going thru w this whole plan has made j respect him a lot more & view them as much more similar in terms of both being practical (and ruthless) enough 2 place larger goals above their own well-being + being willing 2 do things that will make their loved ones hate them as long as it keeps those loved ones safe. so j's feelings towards s have obviously changed quite a bit! of course now s has no idea who j is so. suppose maybe he'll have a chance 2 make a better first impression next time around lol
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Give Me A Reason to Stay (b.b.)
Summary: the battle is over, you can finally breathe. but will bucky give you a reason to stay with him in Louisiana?Â
AN: inspired by the finale of tfaws! so potential spoilers and obvs iâm gonna include some angst (stark!reader)
You finally caught a moment to breathe after what felt like years of fighting. After so long of going from one disaster to the next, you could finally stop and pause. Actually enjoy life for once.Â
Since your father died, you never stopped moving. Being CFO of Stark Industries, helping Wanda escape the authorities after her grief induced episode and then Sam and Bucky called you for help. It never seemed to stop.Â
But, after Karli died and the rest of the Flag Smashers gone, you could take your well deserved pause. At least for a little while before your inherited work called.Â
Sam invited you to come to his home town in Louisiana for a celebration of sorts and you couldnât say no. Him telling you that Bucky was going to be there was also a selling point.Â
You and Bucky had a complicated history. You helped Sam and Steve stop him and HYDRA and then went on the manhunt for him. Even after finding out he killed your grandparents, you were still there. You understood that it wasnât Buckyâs mind, just his body. You were there in Wakanda and helped set him free from his trigger words.Â
But nothing ever progressed from the stolen looks, the longing glances and the quick touches. The amount of times Bucky Barnes saved your life and threatened others who tried to hurt you, you thought he felt something for you. But the nagging feeling in the back of your head told you that you were wrong.Â
At the celebration, the many neighborhood kids were gathered around you as you created stars in your hands, almost like your own personal galaxy. The kids thought it was magic and you rather liked that perspective on your powers.Â
Bucky and Sam were talking with Sarah and some other neighbors but Bucky couldnât focus on the conversation when he was too busy watching you.Â
Your smile was so wide that he thought it could light up a city block. You looked genuinely happy, a look he hadnât seen on you in a long time. It was refreshing and your happiness made him happy.Â
âYouâre being creepy.â Sam commented, nudging the super soldier. âWhat?â Bucky asked. âYouâre staring.â Sam said. âI-I was not staring.â He stammered. âYou so were. Just tell her how you feel already. I can assure you she feels the same way.â Sam told him. âI canât just tell her.â Bucky rebutted. âYes, yes you can. What are you afraid of?â Sam asked.
The 106 year-old man paused for a moment as he continued to stare at you. âI canât be the one that causes her more pain.â He said. Sam furrowed his eyebrows at Buckyâs answer. âSheâs been through too much already. Losing Natasha, watching her father die, the nightmares she has. Iâm not back to myself yet and I canât cause her anymore pain.â Bucky explained.Â
The conversation was cut short when you approached the two men. âIâm so sorry, Sam. Pepper just called and said the donors are pulling out of the eco-friendly power source project weâre working on. She needs my help fixing it.â You told them.Â
âDo you really have to go?â Sam asked. âUnfortunately. Pepper says she can do it on her own, she did it before I was old enough but since my name is still attached to the company, I have to go. Board meeting at 9 tomorrow.â You explained. âIâll go grab Sarah, sheâs going to insist on giving you leftovers to take.â Sam said, giving you a nice smile.Â
You turned to Bucky who was very quiet since you walked over. âSo, youâre really going back?â He asked you. âYeah. Unless you give me a reason to stay.â You answered honestly. And rather boldly.
Bucky wanted to say something so bad. He wanted to tell you that he loved you and wanted you to stay with him there but the words didnât come out. And if he was already feeling bad before, the look on your face broke his heart.Â
You gave him a tight lipped smile, a small head nod before you walked away from him. He watched as you slapped a fake smile on, say goodbye to Sarah and Sam before leaving the party rather quickly.Â
âWhat the happened with Y/N?â Sarah asked approaching Bucky. âNothing. She just had to go.â Bucky lied. Sam saw right through it obviously. Something had happened between you and Bucky and he was determined to find out and play cupid.Â
âWhat really happened?â Sam asked. âShe asked me to give her a reason to stay. And I didnât say anything.â Bucky answered. âCome on, man. You love her, she loves you. Y/N wouldnât give you the time of day if she couldnât handle your baggage. You need each other more than you want to admit, Buck.â Sam said.
Bucky sighed and cursed himself for letting you go. âOkay, what do I do?â He asked. âGo to New York. Pull a rom-com move and crash that board meeting and tell her that you love her.â Sam answered.
And Bucky did just that. He got on the first flight to New York and came up with a whole speech in his head for what he was going to say to you.
He made it at the nick of time and was surprised he still had security clearance to the building. When he arrived to the correct floor, he saw Pepper standing in the hallway.
âBucky, I didnât expect to see you here.â She said to him. âWhereâs Y/N? I need to talk to her.â Bucky said. âSheâs in the conference room, preparing for the meeting.â Pepper answered.
Bucky practically ran to the conference room and almost broke down the door.
âB-Bucky?â You questioned. âI love you, Y/N. You asked me to give you a reason to stay and I was scared. Scared that Iâd cause you more pain and you donât deserve that after what youâve been through. But I canât deny that I love you anymore.â Bucky confessed.
You were at a loss for words, not really expecting a love confession from Bucky Barnes. âYou love me?â You questioned quietly. âYes. I love you.â He said. âCome back to Louisiana with me. We can start over, have the life we both deserve. Or, I can come back here and you can still help Pepper run Stark Industries. I donât care as long as I get a chance at a life with you.â Bucky added.
âYou really mean that?â You asked. âI really do mean that.â He answered. He watched you intently as you processed everything Bucky had just told you.
You looked down at your presentation notes before you picked them up and folded the papers in half. âFriday, can you bring Pepper into the conference room please?â You asked the AI. âOf course, Ms. Stark.â It said.
You and Bucky waited in a tension filled silence when the door opened. âWhatâs going on?â Pepper asked. âI think itâs time I sign those papers.â You told her.
Pepper smiled widely at you, happy that you were choosing yourself over the company for once. âItâs about time.â She commented. âIâll go get them drawn up.â She added before leaving the room.
âWait what papers?â Bucky asked. âIâm giving every aspect of the company to Pepper. Iâll no longer be listed as an executive for Stark Industries. Which means, I can go anywhere I want for as long as I want.â You explained.
âYou mean-â Bucky started. âIâm going to Louisiana with you. For however long youâll have me.â You interjected. Bucky laughed lightly as he made his way over to you, cupped your face in his hands and kissed you deeply.
It was a feeling you both had been waiting for and it was one that was definitely worth the wait. You had been putting off your personal life out of fear it wouldnât work but now you just wanted to be with each other. No matter what happens down the line.
âAnd if it wasnât obvious, I love you too.â You said once you parted. âIâd hope so, doll.â Bucky replied.
â
You and Bucky approached the large gathering of people with food in your hands, saying your hellos and giving out hugs and handshakes.
âThere you two are! I was wondering if youâd ever show!â Sam scolded you two. âWhat do you expect? Weâre newlyweds.â You laughed. âAnd itâs about damn time it happened too.â Sarah commented.
You sat down at the picnic table, Bucky resting his flesh hand on your thigh. You stared down at the ring on your finger quite fondly and thought of your dad. Hoping heâd be proud of letting the company go three years ago and living your life to its fullest.
âAunt Y/N! Can we see the stars again?â Cass asked with all of his friends behind him. âCanât say no to a future leading astronomer now can I?â You teased the boy. You got up from the table and stood a few feet away, creating the stars with your hands like you had years prior.
Again, Bucky watched you fondly but this time he wasnât pining after you, hoping heâd build the courage to tell you how he felt. He was watching you as his wife and as his future.
âYou really do love her, donât you?â Sam asked. âYeah. I really do.â Bucky answered, a smile adorning his face. âYouâre going to be amazing parents.â Sarah added. âParents?â Bucky questioned. âOh no she hasnât told you yet.â Sarah said, standing up from the table.
âIs Y/N,â Bucky started. âAm I what?â You asked. Bucky turned to you and rose from his seat so he could stand eye to eye with you. âAre you pregnant?â He asked.
You looked behind him and glared at Sarah before staring back at Bucky. âYeah, yeah I am. Youâre gonna be dad James Bucky Barnes.â You told him with a watery smile.
Just the thought of bringing a child into the world with Bucky made you more emotional than you thought possible.
âIâm gonna be a dad?â Bucky questioned. You nodded your head and Bucky scooped you up in his arms and if felt like everything was falling into place.
After 109 years of not having an ounce of peace or feeling as if he was a monster and a burden, he was getting the life he had always dreamed of. And he got to do it all with you.
#imagine#imagines#marvel imagine#marvel#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x reader#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan imagine#sebastian stan#tony stark#sam wilson
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Unexpectedly had a chance to catch up on Lupin zero! spoilers!
For fairness I watched episode one again. Overall my opinion didn't change. It's still a lot of fun, good characterization, so-so animation, and too fast-paced. I did enjoy it more this time though, having a better idea of what to expect. The lowest point for me is definitely the sudden bout of openness and emotion between Lupin and Jigen in the gun fight. It's not that I don't like their conversation, it just doesn't feel justified yet. But it's there to frame the short series.
Episode two was also fun and not quite as fast-moving. It put a bit of distance between Lupin and Jigen which I definitely think was needed. Then, when they had become better friends by the end of the episode, it felt earned. And it was just quite a fun train episode. Nothing earth-shaking, but Lupin-like fun. Like episode one, when it came to the climax a lot of things just kind of happened or were explained rather too easily, but hey, now I'm just nitpicking.
Episode three was my favorite so far. Which is a surprise because through it I kept thinking "this reminds me of Other Anime which did the same thing but better." XD But the reason is just that I was really, REALLY happy to see "how did lupin iii become lupin iii?" come into play. Everything in this show is hinging on how they handle that question. This was great because we got to see a little bit of how Lupin thinks of his grandpa (sleazeball), and we got a better idea of how skilled Lupin himself currently is. I admit, when he's walking backwards up the stairs monologuing to trick the other contestants, I initially was happy when one of the others seemed to get the drop on him - I thought, finally, we're getting a reason for making Lupin so young! He's not as skilled yet! But then, of course, he did actually anticipate that and came out on top anyway. Sooo nevermind :P But it didn't actually bug me at all because the whole episode gave us such a great view of Lupin and his grandfather's relationship. Lupin being able to beat his challenge was a part of that. As was his dad showing up - I'm sure Lupin's feelings about him are even more complicated so I'm looking forward to that. Right now I think he's going to be a complex character, but not a bad guy... We'll see.
(Can't not mention the weirdness of looking up your own dad's skirt when he's in disguise as a woman and you don't know it's him... x'D)
So yeah, episode three finally gave me some things I really needed to see more solidly, and I'm so happy about that. Also the appearance of what appears to be Albert?? was so unexpected! I didn't think this show was connected to any other Lupin canon (a term I use very loosely lol). So that's kind of cool? I can only assume we'll see Albert again, but I won't share any theories since I'm too likely to be wrong haha.
I still don't reeeeeally know why Lupin and Jigen needed to be THAT young to do this series. I expected it would mean 1) they're less experienced, and/or 2) they goof off more. But I think it's gotta be difficult when you're de-aging an adult character who is also a genius. They don't want to commit to making him too child-like, but in the end, he does just feel more or less the same as adult Lupin. Jigen too obvs. But, once again, nitpicking. They look adorable. That's the important part inn'it? lol
One more thing: I was curious in episode two when Jigen says he can't quite understand what's going on in Lupin's head. Because that's what I think too. It's hard to tell when he's genuine and when he's acting. Which is pretty in character, so that's cool. I wonder if it's something which will come up again though. Right now we've got a Lupin who really hasn't done all the much thief-like... he's much more the superhero. But if he's too good, it makes what's going on in his head less interesting, so I'm wondering/hoping they'll do something to make him more chaotic neutral, I guess. Well, that's up to people's taste, I like him that way but I'm sure others prefer chaotic good. He's often written that way as well. The point is he can do anything he wants, he doesn't have to be a thief all the time if he'd rather rescue a damsel in distress. But let's just see him being a thief as well as rescuing damsels, you know, for balance ^^ It seems like maybe next episode might show us his more conniving side...
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"Vanitas": The Name and Legacy
Vanitas declares early on that his motive for using the Book of Vanitas to save vampires of the Red Moon is to take "revenge against the Vampire of the Blue Moon". But some of his actions, reactions and expressions seem to contradict a conventional interpretation of "revenge". Seeing how MochiJun is a master of conveying things through facial expressions, nondescript panels, and double meanings, here's my stab at trying to figure out a bit of Vanitas' complexity and his (??hidden??) motives.
â ïžâ ïžâ ïž MANGA SPOILERS, obv â ïžâ ïžâ ïž
Also this analysis is really long. âŒContinuation in reblogs.âŒ
For the sake of minimizing confusion I'm going to refer to our!Vanitas as "Vani", Vampire of the Blue Moon (VotBM) as "Luna", and the name "Vanitas"/"Vanitas of the Blue Moon" as a title in this analysis.
0. "Revenge" against the VotBM
Now, what kicked me into this train of thought initially was watching the scene where Vani announces his revenge plot to all during the Bal Masque. Ofc Bones is doing quite a good job with the anime (I can honestly forgive them for leaving out some scenes knowing budget constraints and that this was probably produced during COVID; it's just more reason to get viewers to read the manga) but there are still some subtle nuances that MochiJun puts in her work that don't get translated into the adaptation. So I revisited Memoire 7 and something just didn't sit right upon looking at that scene retrospectively â which I'll get to that in a bit â but first let me recap what is my interpretation of Vani's proclamation:
The origin story we were told at the start of the series illustrates that vampires are typically born under the Red Moon, except for the one born under the Blue Moon. VotBM, given the moniker "Vanitas of the Blue Moon" by others at the time, is said to have created the Book of Vanitas capable of manipulating the World Formulas in order to curse all the RM vampires that casted them out of vampire society. Cursing the RM vampires = turning them into curse-bearers inflicted with malnomen.
Vani's "revenge" against the VotBM is to use their name "Vanitas" and the Book to cure all RM vampires of their curses and malnomen. In that sense, Vani saving the vampires is directly opposing the vow to curse all RM vampires as told in the VotBM origin story.
Vani's revenge claim seems pretty straight forward. There is nothing of the sort as to claiming he will turn the vampires into humans, or rewrite their existence into something they are not, etc. It is literally just "I will heal you from your sickness out of spite towards the thing that wants you to suffer". His feral revenge proclamation on top of the chandelier lines up with his feral "I will save you no matter what, using whatever method I choose" at the end of Memoire 1 as Noé points out:
So here's the thing that felt a little out of place upon my rereading of Memoire 7:
This panel. Idk about you but as a long time reader of Pandora Hearts, imo one thing that makes MochiJun such a talented artist and great storyteller of plot twists and angst is how she depicts emotions in facial expressions â it is very subtle with a certain finesse. With the above panel, Vani's expression doesn't necessarily look like "anger" or "vengeance" to me. Rather (and it took me a while to place it actually, flipping back and forth between newer and older chapters) his expression looks... melancholic? Melancholy with sense of conviction.
It's noteworthy that MochiJun has made an intentional choice to emphasize Vani gripping his closed fist and his distant stare here, so it has to be important. So, what could Vani be thinking of in this moment? And why?
I. Vani's hidden expressions and feelings towards Luna
To (attempt to) figure out what might be going through Vani's mind in this moment, let's take a look at some moments we've seen Vani making different expressions and when he's thinking back to the VotBM â or really, his time with Luna. Vani claims he hates vampires, but there are obvious exceptions (Jeanne, NoĂ©). What's interesting though is that, despite claiming to hate the VotBM, I don't think he hates Luna. He may hate the being that Luna is but I don't think he hates Luna as a person.
We can see the difference between his hatred and active desire to kill Moreau, as well as his completely blank, no-remorse kinda expression toward the Chasseur's cross in the Catacombes arc vs the above panel after his revenge proclamation:
Also contrast the above chandelier expression to Vani's empty look of distain in Dante's flashback when they first meet:
I would say none of these Vani expressions look very similar to the chandelier one â the empty or blank stares are missing a sense of resolve and the teeth-gritting smirk lacks any bit of sadness felt in the scene. Now, when do we ever see Vani make another expression of what I would call melancholy?
Ughghgh these panels break my heart every time bc there is such a sense of sadness, it's distant but palpable and it is t r a g i c... but I digress.
We have no way of knowing what Vani is thinking in these panels but I have a few ideas:
Vani thinks back to something Luna said about how one should use the Book of Vanitas when Noé says using the Book's power to cure curse-bearers is "overwhelmingly right". What Luna said? Who knows, but it may be along the same lines of "despite its power" and "doing the right thing".
Vani realizes the reason Misha wants Noé to drink his blood is bc Misha doesn't remember what happened That Day. He repeats "... I see." twice as if he's reaffirming to himself that he's the only one left that remembers what happened. If Misha did remember, there would be another person to share the memory but Misha doesn't and Vani is alone in the world in that sense.
If we are to assume that this is what's going through Vani's mind in these moments, then we have to ask why? Vani thinking back to his time with Misha and Luna elicits this sadness (possibly likely?) bc Vani did truly enjoy his time with them and didn't actually hate Luna. In his own flashbacks of Luna teaching he and Misha about malnomen (first being Malnomen PrÚdateur in the Catacombes arc, second of Chloé's Malnomen Millie) and the flashback of "love" during the Gevaudan Arc, we see that Vani may be grumpy or indifferent while being with Luna, but he is still attentively listening and comfortable enough around them for them to hug him:
Ofc, we can't forget that Vani, in his fever and poison-induced delirium, even mumbles to himself ".. didn't actually hate... I didn't... Lou..â" while recovering in the cabin with Jeanne. Given that just before this he asks "Is that what you really want? Truly?" in response to Jeanne saying "This time for sure, I'll kill the beast", perhaps we can even posit that Vani didn't actually hate Luna and didn't actually want to kill them? (I have another theory on what could have happened on That Day but let's get through this one first *wheeze*).
So let's summarize:
Vani claims he will cure RM vampires of their malnomen as revenge toward the VotBM, who is said to have created the Book of Vanitas to curse RM vampires that made them an outcast.
Curing RM vampires of malnomen = revenge since it is directly opposing using the Book to inflict curses
But Vani shows a look of sadness mixed with conviction that contradicts what would be thought of when claiming "revenge", which could possibly be him thinking back to his time with Luna, whom he did not actually hate and possibly did not want to kill but had to anyway.
So here's my theory: the reason why Vani has assumed the name "Vanitas" and is on a quest to cure RM vampires of their malnomen with the Book of Vanitas is to "rewrite" the reputation behind the name Vanitas of the Blue Moon.
... And I will continue explaining this in the reblogs —ïžâ€”ïžâ€”ïž bc holy fuck this meta is so long I have reached the image limit per post asjfklgs
#vanitas no carte#the case study of vanitas#vnc meta#vnc theory#vnc manga#vnc spoilers#vanitas of the blue moon#pls read the continuation before rb#long post#like i mean REALLY long post#w h e e z e
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Watched the new Bond movie! I enjoyed it. The rest of this will be spoilers and also I'm posting from mobile so I can't read more, so just... scroll fast if you don't want to see anything
***
I liked Madeline (Madelyn?) a lot more in this movie than Spectre; she felt like more of an actual character than "here's who we think the perfect woman for Bond would be", which is funny since I think she may have actually had less total screentime? and the flashback scene that opened the movie had already been described in Spectre, but it felt much more relevant and impactful on her actions (and not just because it was, y'know, a significant plot development) in the present day scenes, and her motivations were altogether much more tangible throughout this one... I mean, obviously not to degrade a trauma narrative when it's successful, but Spectre simply was a bad movie where all of the characters were very flat, and she suffered most for it being her first introduction.
I thought No Time to Die was also, overall, a very fitting send off for Craig's Bond. Lashanna Lynch's 007 was compelling and fun-- she truly earned the moniker, and while obvs she didn't NEED Bond's approval, it was nice to see her get it; it WAS nonetheless fitting that she handed it back for the last mission, although I was annoyed they never established what 00 designation Bond was using beforehand (or that, presumably, she was using afterwards). With Madeline being more compelling in this one, the romance between her and Bond was as well, so I liked that Bond got that... closure, I suppose, even if it was so very bittersweet when things fell apart the way they did.
(Although I didn't buy the idea that Heracles was truly permanent and a solution to destroying the nanobots couldn't be found. I mean... c'mon. Why didn't his EMP work, for one thing? but whatever. I did see his death coming a mile away and also kind of appreciated it, so I won't quibble too hard. If for nothing else, Craig finally got to say a true goodbye to a character he hated playing đ)
I liked that Bond's friendships were upheld-- Felix Leiter being the one man Bond evidently told how to find him (as it seemed at least to me that Naomi had followed Felix and thereby found Bond, not that MI6 knew where he was), Moneypenny and Q continuing to side with him over M, and even the first moment with him and Tanner was kind of cute.
(Tangential sidenote: Thanks for confirming Q is gay (or at least dating a dude, he could be bi); it would have been nice for it to be more than a passing line, but tbf it got about the same level of attention as Moneypenny's bf in Spectre. There's just not much room for secondary character's outside lives in these. And Q's an established and beloved character already, which makes it easier to swallow. I know it's going to be #controversial that they so thoroughly skewered 00Q despite both of them being canonically not-straight (well... a controversial take on my own part this time, but I think it's arguable whether or not Bond was bluffing to Silva in that scene in Skyfall, so arguably canon, anyway), and believe me, I have read a ton of 00Q fic and even written some that never quite saw the light of day. But I'm also begging anybody whose first instinct is ANGER to take a deep breath and look at the character arcs and admit that across all 5 Craig movies Bond's was pretty good.)
I am pissed about what happened to Felix, though; he's a great character in the novels and this version of him from Craig's movies has been superb. I would have liked to have seen him potentially stick around as Felix for whoever does the next Bond. Ana de Armas's CIA agent's name escapes me, but she was fun. Maybe she, at least, will stick around to be a CIA contact down the line-- assuming they keep any characters consistent, which I suppose is questionable. It's how they did it with previous M and Q's, maintaining those actors/actresses when possible despite reboots of Bond, but who the hell knows, I guess.
With both Armas's character and Lynch's Naomi (or was it Nomi? I'm so bad with character names), Craig's Bond did his grinny little "so delighted these new people are competent and interesting" thing that he did with Moneypenny and Q in Skyfall (and sort of Madeline in Spectre? but he was just so horny in that scene, idk), and I love that. Which also, notably, he didn't do with Ash (?); shoulda known the guy would turn out to be evil rather than incompetent.
I think Mallory's M was the most undercut by this movie; their mid-movie explanation of his motives re: Heracles made it... better, and I did like the callback to his words to C from Spectre, but it still didn't fully compute since like... if you can't even name your villains, how are you supposed to come up with their DNA? Bad plan, and quite obviously way too easily turned against... everyone. I also didn't care for how insistent they seemed to be through both Spectre and No Time to Die that Bond and M should just never get along, when Skyfall really did set things up for a whole new cooperative set of secondary characters.
Altogether, though, I thought it was a good movie, enjoyable to watch, and capped off the throughline of Craig's movies quite nicely. I was quite content with it.
#no time to die spoilers#bond spoilers#hate tagging spoilers because then it shows up in tags and people putside of my sphere see it but I also don't wanba be a dick so đ€·ââïž#00Q is a wonderful ship esp. post-skyfall and diverging from there#and I personally have always and will always adore the 00qpenny ot3 but like#please take off the shipping goggles and think critically#liking two characters' chemistry doesn't make anything that doesn't put them together a bad story
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Maybe I'm also being animal racist, but a current guess I have for oMaM is that the rabbit Sly saw at the docks was actually the newspaper photographer who seems to be spending a lot of energy documenting Sly's movements at this party, and the bad lighting/state of intoxicated introspection led Syl to make a wrong assumption. (Also did you ever watch Hoodwinked? Spoilers: the reporter bunny did it)
lol hey guys. So I've been fairly MIA the past couple of weeks due to my job trying to actively murder me but I wanted to pop in for a hot second to talk about where we are theory-wise at this point in the season.
First of all, to address the actual ask, I feel like Brennan must have known Longfoot would be suspicious due to ~animal racism~ and put him in as a red herring and now we have even more info to back that up.
I suspect that what's going on with the stuff in the manor is a version of the Pepper's ghost illusion which involves mirrors to do ghostly projections and look pretty darn good for an effect that was invented hundreds of years ago. If you've ever ridden Haunted Mansion at Disney, that's the effect they use to do the waltzing ghosts (fun fact, because the effect mirrors the objects it's used on and the Imagineers forgot to take that into account, all of the female ghosts are leading in the dance!) But that's just fluff, let's talk plot.
So last week's ep threw a LOT of suspicion on Sly with him literally being painted at the villain and Grant doing absolutely nothing to defend himself. And, I'll admit, it would be pretty delicious to not only have Sly foreshadow it earlier with his coy, "Why yes, it also could have been me," and also that Grant himself would have [REDACTED] Rekha a SECOND TIME (watch the Murder Mystery ep of Game Changers if you don't know what I mean--it's my fave ep). But I talked it over with my watch buddy @camwritery and I don't think Sly is actually a baddie. I think this is a double double cross (Lol a cross from Mr. Cross). Here's my thought process.
(1) Yes there's that stack of letters Daisy found in Sly's hand but those easily could have been forged. I'd like Buck to take a look at those since he has that rogue handwriting checking ability.
(2) Squire Badger specially said something was coming to F Sly up and Sly could tell he wasn't the mastermind. Fletcher would make the most sense as to who the mastermind actually is. Like, it wouldn't be so much a twist to the audience but it would be a big ass twist to the CHARACTERS who thought he was fully dead (for the most part) and I feel like that matters more than "subverting expectations" or whatever. It's possible we find out it's actually another party guest I guess (or more likely, that some number of them are involved as accomplices) but Brennan said last week we've met all the characters and it's too late to introduce a new person at this point. And Fletcher is such a through line in Sly and Daisy's stories, it would be weird to not go for the payoff.
(3) So Fletcher is alive. We know this. What would a dead but not dead criminal mastermind want? To ruin his arch nemesis, obv. So, how do you do that? Maybe you fake the death of some mouse to create an unsolvable murder to drive him crazy? And then maybe you work with the person who the fake murder pissed off (because of Sly's inability to "solve" it) to ruin Sly because that guy hates Sly now? And maybe you involve some element of faking deaths in your plan because a faked death is what was central to the original plot that made Sly's reputation and ruined your family? That's so convoluted but this is a guy who handcuffed himself to his enemy and jumped off a waterfall. He's clearly a drama queen and he has nothing but time.
(4) I think Sly has figured this out to some degree and he's decided that letting himself get captured is the best option for him at the moment. Like, he didn't protest at all. Which, yes, checks out to his laidback, posh casual persona but I think he knows that if anything happens to anyone while he's locked up then it casts suspicion on someone besides him or it means the "murders" have to stop because no one will kill anyone while he's not active as a possible suspect due to literally not being able to murder anyone. Speaking of--
(5) Yeah, I don't believe these are murders. All those dead bodies from the list? Badgers, corvids, horned animals. That's the badger fam and their spouses. And the one guy we "knew" was dead also doesn't seem to be dead (which Brennan seeded from the start with Conor's widow hearing his voice which seems possible if she lives so close and he was alive this whole time). I guess framing Sly for a full family murder or something was the plan? But that doesn't quite check out because presumably they'd un-die at some point and I feel like they wouldn't want to live under assumed identities in animal Bavaria or something. I know news doesn't travel fast w/o the internet but they're prominent people. News would spread I assume. Maybe the death faking was to make Sly believe he was crazy? Or to believe in ghosts? Messing with a genius's mind is I'm sure one of the worst things you can do. There's also Buck's Frankenstein theory which is a little out there but they were trying crazy stuff with electricity and dead bodies back in the day. Kind of a wild pull but cam sent me this about a Dr. Squires from the same-ish time period shocking someone back to life. It would be wild and now we have some alt explanations for the electricity but gotta explore all options. And this would Constance to call her dad a madman, lol.
(6) Grant/Sly has a lot more info than us with all those maddening redacted texts so it's very likely he has some long game happening we know nothing about. I wondered if he might have known about Fletcher for a while--when Daisy revealed he was alive he was surprised but I don't remember if he was surprised that he was alive or if it was ambiguous and it might just be that he didn't tell her. I assumed he didn't know at all (because I feel like that's what Brennan narrated in episode 1) but I need to go back and check.
(7) At the end of the day, D20 is a show that rewards love and friendship over betrayal and the like. This very much could be the first season with a real betrayal but I'm kinda skeptical. Sly could just be a big faker but he seems genuine to me. Also, what would his motive even be here? This doesn't seem like his style and I don't know why he'd do this.
(8) Lars failed their check on purpose and Ian saw full puppydog earnestness. Sly if you've been a bad guy this whole time and Lars didn't know, bitch I'll kill you
(9) Not really on topic but I want to note, Daisy's find of that second trick portrait makes me thing my theory was correct and there's a third somewhere. I wonder where.
(10) Even less on topic but the "Show Her Your Butt 2: Electric Boogaloo" sequence last week made me spit soda everywhere and I think that should be acknowledged.
#mice and murder#mice and murder spoilers#dimension 20#dimension 20 spoilers#d20#asks#madamxpresident
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First Line Meme
Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line, then tag 10 of your favorite authors!
tagged by @phoenix-ascended thank you!!!! đ
Okay SO. Iâm gonna cheat a little bit here. The first nine Iâm going to post are all going to be from the first nine chapters of time cast a spell on you (but you wonât forget me) but to be fair the chapters are so long they each might as well be a story all their own lmao. ANYWAY. Here we go. Iâll post the first paragraph from each I guess, in order of chapter number obvs:
1. Quentin shook out the tension in his hands. He didnât understand why it wasnât getting any easier. For days on end heâd been trying to perfect the illumination spell the rest of his fellow First Years had nailed in a matter of hours. But no matter how he tried, Quentin couldnât seem to make anything more than a spark.
2. Quentin waited until Eliot was asleep to slip out of bed and hastily tug his clothes back on. The illuminated screen of his phone told him it was just past 12am. Clutching his shoes to his chest, he opened the door as quietly as he could manage and tip-toed out into the hall, all but running to his room and clicking the lock shut firmly behind him.
3. Dry-mouthed and groggy, Quentin woke in Eliotâs bed alone. He groaned, groping around for his phone to check the time for a long moment before remembering heâd left it in his room. Quentin rubbed at his eyes, rolling over and up to his feet, muscles he didnât even know existed screaming as he went. He picked his bathrobe up from the floor and pulled it on, then tottered down the hall to empty his bladder and brush his teeth and gulp down frantic handfuls of water from the bathroom sink.
4. Tuesday morning was hell. Quentin woke just before eleven, empty as a husk. Filthy, all used up. His thighs sticking together where Eliotâs come had dried there in the night. Quickly realizing heâd already missed his first class of the day, Quentin pressed his face into his pillow, pulled the covers up over his head, and surrendered to the blank comfort of late morning sleep.
5. Quentin couldnât feel his face, or much of his body for that matter. Which was⊠fine. It was great. It was fucking phenomenal. As long as it meant he also couldnât feel the sinkhole that had formed in the center of his chest. The one that had been there for days, weeks, months, fucking years. He couldnât feel anything at all.
6. Quentin felt a lever turn inside his chest, the source of his magic eking out a spark. Enough at least to send a message to Julia back at Brakebills. One of those little enchanted paper airplanes theyâd learned his first week in Practical Applications that he never could get to fly quite right. He scrawled his SOS on a cocktail napkin and watched it flutter away like the worldâs saddest butterfly. The universe took pity on him. Quentin figured he was probably due. 7. Christmas morning was a lackluster affair.
Exchanging gift cards over coffee and devouring great mounds of Ted Coldwaterâs Famous Ham and Eggs while still in their pajamas. After, Julia and Quentin lay on the living room floor and Skyped with James, his grandparents waving hello from Pennsylvania in the background. They opened the stack of impersonal and overly-extravagant gifts from Juliaâs mother that had been delivered to the house the night before. Quentin received a pair of cashmere socks and a leather belt with a shiny silver buckle.
8. Quentin stood at the bathroom sink, watching his face shift in the steamy mirror glass. Stark naked save for the towel looped around his hips. Hair dripping in cool, fat beads down onto the planks of his shoulders. So clean he swore he could feel himself sparkling from the inside out.
9. Quentin tossed his phone down onto the floor and leaned back into Eliotâs heat. âItâs almost like you want my dad to know Iâm faking sick so I can stay in and let you fuck me until I pass out.â
Some patterns I guess: I love how chapters 2-4 all open with Quentin in bed after hooking up with eliot but all with very different vibes. In chapter 2, heâs just experienced subspace for the first time without having any idea thatâs what actually happened to him and he is having A Time. In chapter 3, they had a very intense hook-up the night before and Quentin is sneaking out again, but this time he fully plans on returning right after. And in chapter 4, we see the joy of their beginnings at Columbia contrasted hard with the misery of where Quentin is at Brakebills.
ALSO 2/3 of the chapters begin with Quentinâs name which feels right considering just how deep into his headspace we are in this fic.
Okay. Anyway. Moving on:
10. Eliot loved watching Quentin lose himself in a moment.
It could be anything really: mastering a brand new spell; savoring something decadent and sweet; fussing with his hair when he thought no one was looking; focusing very hard on making himself a cocktail and getting the ratios just right; ranting about his Fillory books; reading his Fillory books, to himself but especially aloud; reading anything; riding dick...
That last one held a particularly special place in Eliotâs heart.
(from but i would die for you in secret aka the one where eliot is pretty sure quentin is only using him for his dick. spoiler alert: heâs not theyâre just idiots)
11. Teddy was turning six years old. There was nothing in the world he loved more than stories.
His favorite was a version of Lord of the Rings Quentin had cobbled together from memory. He must have told it to their son a hundred times before it occurred to Eliot he could contribute more to story time than ogling Quentinâs hands while he spoke, or popping in to suggest when the Balrog should actually be making an appearance, Quentin.
(from in a land far away aka the mosaic fic where eliot makes margo hand puppets for teddy)
12. The words came out of Quentinâs mouth without a single coherent thought behind them.
âIâm just about to catch a movie with my boyfriend!â
There, outside the coffee shop on Eighth Avenue, Quentinâs maybe-friend from high school whose name he couldnât even remember shot him a wide-mouthed grin. âOh, thatâs wonderful!â she said. âWhich movie? My wife Danielle and I donât have any plans for the afternoon and weâd love to tag along. Isnât that right sweetie?â
(from your name like a song (i sing to myself) aka the one where quentinâs memory is shit and he and eliot pretend to be boyfriends in a post-monster world)
13. Eliot dropped the last box onto the floor. âDaddyâs wardrobe is safe at last,â he said, lowering himself down into the gold chair with a sigh. âThough I canât seem to shake the terrible feeling that Todd raided my closet at the Cottage before I could get to it all.â
Quentin surveyed the damage from his spot on the sofa: there were at least seven large packing boxes bursting at their seams scattered around the penthouse. âI donât know how you would even be able to tell. Iâm pretty sure one of those boxes is just vests.â
Eliot quirked a brow in his direction. âSome of us are cultivating an aesthetic, Quentin,â he said. âAnd I didnât see you complaining when I let you dress me for dinner last night.â
Quentin couldnât help but smile. âI wouldnât call picking between two pre-approved ties dressing you, El.â
âIâm also counting the fact that you said my ass looked great in my new pants.â
(from the parentheses (all clicking shut behind you) aka the suspender porn fic)
14. The night Quentin Coldwater died, a brand new star appeared in the sky over Brakebills. A little brighter than Venus, it stayed fixed in the same position for weeks on end. Eliot hardly would have noticed such a thing if it hadnât been for the way that it hummed. Or at least, thatâs how it felt. A humming in his bones. An old, familiar presence. Margo thought that heâd gone mad with grief. Alice was the only one who could understand.
(from a myth of devotion aka the one where eliot is sorta icarus and quentin is sorta the sun)
15. It didnât happen the way Eliot expected it to. He dropped the letter into the mailbox, and pain blossomed in his abdomen so brightly it was like heâd gone supernova.
And everything went dark.
(from by night, beloved, tie your heart to mine aka the one where eliot sends the letter)
16. Eliot stretched out over the mosaic, his shirt riding up just a little as he clicked a yellow tile into place, and Quentinâs pulse leapt in his neck once, twice. Three times. His breath hitched. It was becoming nearly impossible to focus. In the heat of the sun, watching the sweat soak Eliotâs shirt clean-through.
(from i wonât deny (all the things i would do) aka the one where quentin and eliot start hooking up three months into their life at the mosaic)
17. After they decided kissing on the mouth was okay, Quentin and Eliot wanted to do it all the time. In every corner of the penthouse (âIf you donât stop sucking face while Iâm trying to eat my sandwich,â Kady said one afternoon, âIâm literally going to feed you to the Baba Yaga.â), outside coffee shops, in between bites at the sushi place in Chelsea that Eliot loved. Once, they went to see a movie they couldnât even remember the name of just to make out for two blissful, uninterrupted hours in the dark.
(from and a song of praise upon your lips aka part three of the box of chocolates series where quentin and eliot are definitely dating and finally talk about their feelings)
18. Eliot startled awake to something sharp and pointed slamming into his shin. He opened his eyes, and the toe of Margoâs shoe made contact one last time. Pain seared up the side of his leg, and he winced. Jesus, she really did not realize her own strength sometimes. Or the strength of her Jimmy Chooâs.
(from that you may know (the secrets of your heart) aka part two of box of chocolates aka the one where hand stuff is still banging)
19. Eliot Waugh was High King in his blood, and somehow that felt right. When they first arrived in Fillory, Quentin assumed he would be the one to wear the crown. Heâd dreamed of it most of his life after all. On the throne in Whitespire, a fleet of talking animals at his disposal, a noble quest waiting around every corner to ferry him away to the next grand, heart-stopping adventure. But when the blade bit into his palm and drew no blood, and Eliotâs came up red, it felt like the final piece of some perfect puzzle clicking into place.
(from and this is the map of my heart aka the one where quentin wants to marry eliot and they have some incredibly filthy sex before everything falls apart)
20. Eliot walked into the penthouse to an eerie quiet. He found Quentin sitting in the kitchen under a dim illumination spell, drinking a beer and poking at the screen of his phone.
âHey,â Eliot said, setting his shopping bag down on the counter. âWhere is everyone?â
Quentin sighed, rubbing at his eyes. He looked like he hadnât slept in days. âOut. I donât know.â
Eliot squinted at him. âYou didnât want to go with them?â
Quentin lifted his eyes, shot Eliot a look. âNo.â
(from for love (if it finds you worthy) aka part one of the box of chocolates series)
And I have now been here doing this for so long I no longer have time to try and find anymore patterns lmao BUT I will be tagging: @thelucindac @akisazame @fishfingersandscarves @nellie-elizabeth @freneticfloetry @rubickk7 and anyone else who wants to play!
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As promised from yesterday...
Yesterday following my not-so-brief rant post, I stated that Iâd follow up the travesty of that event with a more in-depth analysis and more collected thoughts. That is what awaits you under the cut! Be warned though, there are going to be major spoilers for the event (and possibly things that occur from lesson 20 and prior)
First Iâm going to give a summary of the event and how I view it. This is mostly for those of you who havenât played the event yet, so you can understand why the community is so angry about it. If youâve already played, feel free to skip the next 3 paragraphs.
It starts out with Lord Diavolo suggesting a party to improve the bonds between the exchange students and the student council. Asmodeus suggests that everyone should dress up - but nothing big, just small angel wings and such. Diavolo shakes his head and says that everyone should go all out, because if youâre going to dress up, you may as well go all the way. Several of the brothers (Mammon, Lucifer, Belphegor) express disdain for this, saying that they donât want to get dressed up, but Diavolo uses his own magic to put them into outfits anyway. Not just any outfits. Their old Celestial Realm outfits. Simeon then mentions that Michael has given him a gift to give to the brothers, as a thank you for them treating the angels so well. The gift is only for the brothers, not MC, not Diavolo, just the brothers. Simeon aware of the effect the bangles will have on the brothers. He does not tell them this until theyâve put it on. He knows fully well that the bangles will cause them to act in more ârighteous waysâ. The bangles then react unexpectedly with Diavoloâs magic, causing the outfits and bangles to become irremovable. That is to say, they cannot take them off. It was forced upon them when several of them clearly showed that they did not want to go along with this, and now they cannot undo it. Thatâs the first issue.
After this, Diavolo still decides that he wants to hold the party, and Simeon agrees. The preparations continue nonetheless. Throughout the event, we speak to the brothers as theyâre preparing for the party. Here weâre shown that the brainwashing of the bangles is gradual, not immediate. Mammon is able to resist it slightly at first, claiming that heâs going to cut the clothes off of him. Once he grabs the scissors, his behavior changes. He decides that what heâs doing is dangerous and instead goes to put the scissors away. This action scares Leviathan, who fears that theyâre all going to turn out like Mammon and that he doesnât want that to happen. When weâre alone with Lucifer and Satan, the bangles have only started to affect them, but it hasnât fully kicked in. They express that they donât like the situation at all and that they donât feel like themselves, ending their interactions by telling MC to leave them alone because they donât want to be seen like this. Speaking to the rest of the brothers, the effects of the bangles have been fully realized. Leviathan has put away all of his obsessions, offering a Ruri-Chan figure to MC because he âdoesnât need it anymoreâ. He goes on to say that he was hiding behind anime and manga and that from now on he will work on nurturing his relationships with his brothers and being honest with MC about his feelings. Even if MC rejects him or calls him gross, he doesnât get upset. This is obviously out of character for our beloved otaku.
The rest of the brothers suffer a similar fate. Beelzebub no longer feels hungry, claiming that instead of feeding himself, he wishes to feed others and see them happy. He says that he wants to be kinder, implying that he wasnât kind enough before - which is fucking bullshit because holy shit this is Beel weâre talking about are you fucking kidding me you donât think Beel was kind enough he was literally the nicest of the brothers what the fuck are you on about - ANYWAY. Belphegor goes on to say that he was wasting his life by sleeping it away, and that all of his brothers are good and that he wants to spend more time with them. He doesnât want to take naps anymore, unless prompted by MC, and he says that he used unfair tactics when trying to win MCâs love. He also says that he wonât be doing that anymore, and is instead going to do things âthe fair wayâ. Asmodeus offers you all of his beauty products, claiming that he was trying too hard to be beautiful before. If you choose to kiss him, heâll go along with it, but say that he feels like heâs betraying his brothers and being unfair and sneaky. For some reason, I canât recall much of Mammonâs interaction for the life of me. I remember him saying that he was mean and rude and greedy and shameless before, and how he wants to change to be a better person now, but I donât remember the second half of the interaction. I just know it was bad. The event ends with the party being held, Diavolo and Simeon smiling and laughing, Solomon and Luke being concerned, and Lucifer overcoming the power of the bangle. Well, thatâs what Lucifer says, but I believe he was lying.
Hereâs my actual opinions on it: It was fucked up! I left this bit out of the summary, but all of the brothers (after Lucifer and Satan) express that they donât want to do anything unless youâre okay with it. They want to be someone good enough that youâd approve of it. They donât want to upset their brothers. All in all, theyâre prioritizing the thoughts and feelings of others over their own. They express hatred for their past selves, condemning their actions and interests as shameful and wrong. Even their most harmless actions. They got rid of every single bit of their own personality in order to âpurifyâ themselves. This ideology is the exact embodiment of toxic positivity and itâs revolting. I would also like to focus more on how all of the brothers (except for Asmodeus and Beelzebub) showed that they didnât like this idea. for the most part, they were strongly against it. Satan, who according to this event, has never been an angel, says that he doesnât feel like himself at all. He shows the most fear towards the effects of the bangle and quite frankly itâs just. Disturbing to see someone like Satan so afraid. Lucifer tries to hide his worry, but his thoughts are similar to Satanâs, since he also says that he canât rest because he doesnât feel like himself.
Some of you might think that the changes were good or harmless or whatever, and you might have appreciated the fact that theyâre trying to change for the better, but realize this: their change was forced. They didnât do it of their own free will, they didnât have any experiences that caused them to think or feel this way. It was all forced. Theyâve been brainwashed. They are not doing this of their own accord. Itâs not them. They are not themselves.
And this is not a side effect of the Celestial Realm or being an angel! If youâve played through certain cards devilgram story (Belphegorâs âHatredâ or Luciferâs âGlory Daysâ) you can see that the brothers are still themselves even though they are angels. They still have their personality and are not completely âholyâ or âpureâ or ârighteousâ. This is specifically a result of the bangles. If this had been part of the main story it would have been interesting. It could have been more thought out and well written and had a conclusive ending. So where am I going with this?
I believe that the devs had good intentions but executed them poorly. This is an event, meaning itâs non-canon and not related to the main story. I think that the devs wanted to show how toxic the beliefs of the angels can be, and they did good on that. That was genuinely disturbing to play through. What theyâre missing is criticism. If the brotherâs had returned to their normal selves and said âwhat the fuck was thatâ, then it would have been okay. If they had focused more on how wrong and weird the changes were, and how itâs actually bad, then that would have been a satisfying conclusion. But they didnât. Well, there was one brother that supposedly returned to his normal self, right? Lucifer.
At the party, Lucifer tells MC that heâs returned to his normal self, but admittedly the clothes still cannot be removed. He shows that he didnât enjoy the experience, but as heâs watching the rest of his brothers still controlled by the bangles, he...doesnât do anything. He says that itâs interesting and that they should let it play out a bit more, just to watch them. Now, I am not a Lucifer simp. My MC has copious issues with him. However. This characterization is just PLAIN FUCKING WRONG! WHAT?! What were the devs thinking?! Thatâs Lucifer! He cares about his brothers above all else in this world! He was strongly against the angel outfit and bangle idea! He said that it made him feel unlike himself! Lucifer has experienced the brainwashing of the bangle first hand! He would never, EVER say something like that when he KNOWS how serious it is. Yes, he is a sadist. Yes, he likes to joke sometimes. But this? He would be way more concerned for them. Which is why I believe he was still under the effects of the bangle. I donât have a full theory for how much it was affecting him at that point in time, but that will probably come about later.
Anyway, those are my thoughts on the event thus far! Itâs possible that the next event will have a callback to this one (considering how this one mentioned TSL: The Musical) but I highly doubt it. I also donât think that thereâs going to be continuation of this in the main story. I doubt weâll ever get our resolution, but if you want one, I plan on rewriting the entire event on my Wattpad. Iâll announce it when I finish posting it, so feel free to follow for that or just check it out later. My dms should be open and obv you can comment/reblog on this post so if you want to discuss this more, feel free to intract!
#obey me#obey me swd#mod talks#long post#haha sorry ive got many thoughts head full#ive scripted a whole animatic for this event with mind electric from hawaii part two but i dont animate so idk how that's gonna work out#hope you enjoyed!#this took like an hour and a half to write jkefhgjk
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So. Here are some of my personal thoughts on ith movie. since this post is LONG, most of the thoughts are leaning towards criticism & ofc it contains spoilers so imma put my bad takes under cut. theyâre my personal, subjective opinion, so itâd be normal if you agree/disagree. anyways, youâve been warned.
The opening song
stage performance & movies are two VERY different media, so unavoidably they had to make many changes to adapt the musical to big screen. One thing they were trying to adapt was the breaking the fourth wall narration in the opening song. they changed the setting of a lot of these lines to Usnavi telling a bunch of kids in an unknown future timeline abt Washington Heights. I personally am not a fan of this decision. the cut between the two different timelines in that 8 min release got me pretty confused & taken out & that feeling did not change much when i was watching the movie either. in the course of the movie, suddenly cutting to future timeline breaks the flow & consistency of the narrative for me, esp since the future scenes rlly arenât that long. Ik it's for the reveal in the end. I still don't like it.
Choreography
the choreography & cinematography by themselves are hella fantasitc. thereâre VERY pretty scenes and choreography, esp during songs. from top of my head i can name a few: the reflection of dancing in the opening song, the running scene in It Wonât Be Long Now, the pool scene (with Vanessa floating on a life saver in the middle) in 96000, THE FUCKING ENTIRETY OF PACIENCIA Y FE, the dancing in The Club, the horizontal dancing scene in When The Sun Goes Down, etc. But a lot of the scenes, esp those that involve group dancing, seems a bit out of place when they seem to take place in the real world rather than on stage. This is prolly another demonstration of the difference in the media of stage performance & movies. I had a hard time to suspend my disbelief, and the movie trying to place some of the dancing in the actual narrative rlly didnât make it better for me.
(at first I thought for some reason the pool scene in 96000 was everyoneâs imagination coming together & was looking forward to it. I did not expect it to actually take place in a pool in the movie & they even used a whole sequence of them going to the pool to show them going to the pool to set it up. So is the dancing in the intro. i did not expect an overhead shot to reveal that it actually happened. Moments like these gave me serious pauses & made me unable to rlly appreciate the fantastic cinematography & choreography.)
bc of the reason i stated & the fact the movie is so centered around these songs & the plot gets cut by the narration from the future, this movie kinda strikes me as a series of well-made music videos connected by loose plots & themes rather than an actual movie.
Plot change
as we all are aware, they made several choices regarding the plot.Â
changing ninaâs reason to leave Stanford from unable to take care of school & jobs to provide for her living at the same time to experience of racism. iâm personally not a fan of this change - i am not implying that racism is not an issue that poc experience daily. Itâs just, I expected a more nuanced discussion on racism & identity in a movie centered around a socially & financially marginalized minority group than a few lines of âmy roommate lost her shit so her & RA searched meâ, âthe school board thought i was a waitress at diversity dinnerâ, âthe waiters looked at me in the looks that question if i am with themâ, and âi felt lonely and without a community thereâ. They are pretty superficial considering their impact in the story. tbh the line âwhen i was younger iâd imagined what would happen if my parents had stayed in Puerto Ricoâ did a much better job to capture the identity crisis that first gen immigrant children go thru and gave me more emotional impacts than all the horrible things stanford did to nina.Â
deleting Hundreds of Stories and putting Paciencia y Fe right before abuelaâs death. i understand itâs a narrative choice bc they decided to reveal that abuela won the lottery later & make it that Usnavi had saved to move to DR in the beginning. in the changed lyrics of Paciencia y Fe we also had a peak of abuelaâs struggle of deciding whether to leave or stay in Washington Heights. which is nice. but putting that song right before abuela dies rlly makes her conflicting feelings unimportant to the story... maybe the leave or stay refers to her dying, but she doesnât rlly have much of a choice either way, does it. sheâs just.. kinda like some characters in anime.. whose tragic backstory is narrated right before they die to get the readers emotional... but in a pretty song sequence... the choreography & lighting is very pretty tho. gotta give credit where itâs due.
Sonnyâs subplot. i rewatched the movie and realized that there was some foreshadowing of his illegal status in the beginning when Daddy Sonny was talking to Usnavi, but tbh it was quite easy to miss.. so i was a bit surprised when they brought up Sonnyâs subplot when there was only 45 min left of the movie. that was not enough time to fully develop this plot, esp given that time is used for other subplots too. we know Sonny is very aware of the politics & is sorta an activist, but him wanting to be like Nina & wanting to get into college wasnât established earlier, so that part following the protest scene feels a bit flat.
Other things
Iâve seen the discussion of the filmâs lack of rep of Afro-Latinos, but I am not the most qualified person to talk abt the experience of Afro-Latino community. Iâm keeping my ears open and learning on this subject.Â
I liked that they made Daniela & Carla a couple and was excited when i heard the news. The movie itself was not rlly explicit on their relationship tho - there were scenes of Carla pulling Daniela outta bed in the beginning & their dancing. but tbh the fact that they added a third Salon lady, Cuca, whoâs always hanging around, makes D&C relationship harder to notice. Im not gonna say blink and youâll miss it, but itâs pretty easy to miss. obv their relationship has nothing to do w the main plot, but eh. wished it was more explicit.
Tl;dr: i think they have a lot of interesting ideas that they didnât explore fully so the movie feels a bit all over the place. this goes for Vanessaâs hope to become a fashion designer, Ninaâs experience of racism & identity crisis, Sonnyâs illegal status. Loved Daniela and the songs tho. Piragua songâs funny as hell. A bit sad they didnât paint abuela in the finale :(
i am familiar w the source material & liked it a TON but i donât like it enough to feel nostalgia.. so i canât go in there with a fresh mind & see it without comparing it to the original, and neither do i hold so much affection for it that i can happily ignore the defects. so honestly iâm probably in the group that has the worst experience watching it
also: pls lmm i beg u pls donât make a live action adaption of hamilton, pls
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hi @chocolatecarstairs came up with these post-CHOG questions and i really want to answer them because im sad that im finished reading it :((
MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW
what was your favorite part, 1 or 2?
Honestly I loved both parts, but Iâd say I loved part two just a little bit more for the time that James wasnât under the curse anymore and LOVED Cordelia
which scene in the book was your favorite?
EVERY scene that had Matthew and James being wholesome parabatai in it!!! my favourite chapter in this book was Blue Ruin, the one after Grace takes the bracelet back from James (aside from the whispering room ofc).
what scene (or scenes) made you cry the most?
ok ngl i didnt spend much of this book crying, but the only scene that actually made me tear up was when james was dying and matthew could feel it and jesse (WHO I FUCKING LOVED MORE THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD) gave him his last breath :(((((
what scenes were unsatisfactory?
there were not enough Christopher scenes (but to be fair, even if the entire book was just Christopher it still wouldnt be enough for me)
but fr, i cant think of any off the top of my head but iâll edit this if i do later
what made you laugh the most?
matthew!! james!! thomas!! christopher!! also some of the things Jesse said
what bored you?
this wasnât boring, but the whole charles/alastair plot line didnât have me very invested. I did love the alastair/ cordelia scenes tho, so it was just charles that was the problem
also no offense to james bc he was my first actual fictional crush after reading TMH/NBS but like whenever he talked about being in grace i would literally zone out lol the bracelet curse makes him so boring but whenever he isnt in the curse/ is with someone who is NOT grace i just!! love him!!
what disappointed you?
cassie honestly had me kinda shipping matthew/cordelia for a solid FIVE SECONDS there when he stepped in to dance with her after james left her standing there, but that was one of the only scenes that made me feel like they had natural chemistry (along with the scene where he drops her off at her house). I felt like the during the rest of their interactions in the book, cordelia was kind of uncomfortable, which made me really sad because even tho she has every right to feel that way, i felt bad for matthew. I kind of want him to fall for someone else completely and for it to be reciprocated. also, i just really want for matthew and cordelia to become good friends because i feel like they could have such great natural chemistry if matthew didnt love her.
what is the top thing you wish had been done differently?
see above.
what things did you predict that came true?
JAMES BURNING DOWN BLACKTHORN MANOR I FUCKING SAID HE WOULD DO IT TWO FUCKING YEARS AGO IF YALL WANT ME TO LINK THE THEORY LMK
what are some things that were really unexpected?
ok thereâs quite a few things here so bear w me babes:
- James genuinely loving cordelia from the start. I wasnât expecting him to naturally feel nothing for grace at all, so i was expecting a slow burn jordelia, but finding out that he actually loves her makes me so happy but the end where cordelia thinks he was just pretending breaks my heart :(((
-matthew liking cordelia lol definitely was not expecting another parabatai love triangle but i hope it doesnt last. i do think it adds to the plot and i love it, it just hurts to see matthew so emo :(((
-I was expecting to like cordelia as a character, but i ended up LOVING her so fucking much???? sheâs so three dimensional to me, and itâs interesting to see how her personality adapts around different characters as people adapt around different social circles irl
-liking jesse as much as i did
-ok so jamesâ entire character was a surprise to me. itâs so fascinating to see how the bracelet actually affected his personality.If you recall him in The Midnight Heir from TBC. heâs like an entirely different person. i still loved him in TMH but i went into CHOG thinking that if he was gonna be like that the entire time iâd probably get over him really quickly. i was pleasantly surprised by how much i ended up loving him even more tho
-i didnât expect oliver hayward to die and im going to stay emo about it
- Christopher is so much more clear headed than he was made out to be prior?? like there were so many scenes where he was fully there and when he defended anna to alastair i just kfdsnfkld i love him
are there characters that you didnât like before that you like now?
yikes umm... Alastair, maybe? heâs somewhat okay to me now, I dont dislike him as much as I used to. ooh and Hypatia Vex. the only scene i remember liking her in QOAAD was when she helped out kit, ty and dru (me, going a whole TSC post without somehow mentioning kit? not possible)
are there characters that you liked before that you donât like now?
I started CHOG ready to give Grace the benefit of the doubt, and I was surprised by how timid and shy she seemed at the start, but it was interesting to see how it was all an act and how she doesnât have an actual personality yet. one could argue that she actually does love james, but i doubt it at this point. i dont hate her yet, even tho she IS fucking up jamesâ life, but sheâs on thin fucking ice.
who was your favorite new character?
does new character mean completely new or just never been in a novella new? because for the first, it would be Cordelia (i LOVE her sm!!) and other wise it would be james, matthew and co. also!!! jesse!!
what places in the book would you like to visit?
that hell dimension sounds pretty lit ngl
did you like the ending?
ok so. we KNOW that jordelia is gonna be endgame. cassandra clare always takes the hardest path to get there, but when has she not delivered? itâs just a matter of waiting. so, yes, i did like the ending in sense of the plot because it was a great twist, but i also feel really bad for all of them even tho ik theyâre eventually gonna be together :(((
what did you think of the epilogue?
i wasnt surprised, since we alr know that Tatiana is shady asf, but i just really wanna know how she partnered up with a GREATER demon like lol wtf. again, im really happy in terms of plot with this
what are your thoughts on the engagement?
i feel so. fucking bad. for cordelia. and james too, even tho heâs under the braceletâs curse so he doesnt even KNOW heâs being manipulated. but i love how even through the curse, james still loves cordelia in his own way.
what did you want to see that didnât happen?
matthew getting therapy periodt
umm honestly i just want more âmerry thievesâ content like i just love. all of them.
what do you wish had been resolved that wasnât?
i really want matthew to tell james or cordelia what happened because i just need him to be loved and supported lol i want to give him a hug.Â
what is your favorite pairing as of now?
jordelia!!! and lucie and jesse are kind cute rn, and i like them if theyre gonna be pining after eachother but i feel like if they actually get together i wont like the relationship as much.
which characters would you like to see more of in the next book?
CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHERÂ
ANNA!!! i lovED reading about her sheâs so badass
matthew!! jesse!! also i wanna see more of those bitchy girls lol just so we can see anna or cordelia tell them to stfu
what is one character whose death you would undo if you could?
ok i know that jesse is still very much a conscious character despite being dead but like,,, i want him to be the way he was before and also i want him to come back to life
and barbara!! she seemed so sweetÂ
which characters got bad/unsatisfactory endings?
ummm barbara? i cant really say much on this yet bc its still only the first book and when has the first book ever ended up with anyone being happy.
oh but also can we sign a petition to make cassie let matthew actually survive the series because my heart aches just at the THOUGHT of eventually having to read a scene where he dies
which characters got what they deserved?
literally. none of them yet. :(
who should have died but didnât?
Tatiana lol also lowkey charles but i also feel pity him to an extentÂ
what plotline are you most excited to see in the next book?
okay the entire jesse plot has me hooked because i LOVE his character. also i love the bracelet plot but its making me MAD because i just want james to be happy but
what is one scene that you wish hadnât happened, but you know was unavoidable?
THE ONE WHERE GRACE PUTS THE BRACELET BACK ON JAMES. i mean obv there was no way he was completely done with grace, but i literally got so sad at that part like why HIM of all people smfh let him be happy
which pairing do you like the least?
alastair x charles, grace x james, lucie x matthew bc neither of them actually like either imo lol
what are some theories you have for chain of iron?
- not necessarily for COI but i think matthew is gonna get exiled and turned into made into a mundane
- the bracelet will break (?)
- jesse will come back to life (like actual life) at the end of the book
-grace is gonna do something to help the main characters, making it hard for us to hate her.
what characters do you think should have gotten more plot time?
lol are yall gonna hate me if i say christopher again (also anna)
anyways this was really fun!!!!! PLEASE ASK ME STUFF ABOUT MY OPINIONS AND STUFF OR JUST SAY ANYTHING ABT THE BOOK BC IM DESPERATE TO TALK TO PPL ABOUT IT
#chain of gold spoilers#chain of gold#james herondale#Cordelia Carstairs#Matthew Fairchild#lucie herondale#anna lightwood#thomas lightwood#alastair carstairs#charles fairchild#christopher lightwood#grace blackthorn#jesse blackthorn#tatiana blackthorn#the last hours#tlh#cassandra clare#the last hours spoilers#chog spoilers
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Merlin- S1:E1- The Dragonâs Call
Hey so I decided to rewatch Merlin because I never quite finished it and donât remember what happened enough to pick up where I left off, and I thought Iâd blog my thoughts about it! All I really remember, besides the obvious, is how remarkably shippable Arthur and Merlin were despite that clearly not being the writers intention. I have a feeling Iâll come to the same conclusion with this rewatch, especially since Iâm starting out with my gay goggles on, but who knows?? Letâs gooooooooooooooooo
**obv this will not be spoiler free but A. The show has been over for a long time and B. all spoilers will be under the cut**
Hey so now that Iâve done this, Iâd decided I donât want to continue because I simply donât care that much about this show. So, sorry if you enjoyed this, donât expect any more.
Colin Morgan is honestly the most adorable little nugget of a man <3
Ok this CGI effect for the reveal of the kingdom is .... not good actually ....Â
The score, however, is gorgeous. I mean we all know the main theme is a bop but just listen to the music as he looks around here, itâs so grand and fantastic.
All of this video quality is actually just not great, when the heck is this from again? *googles* It aired in 2008. I feel like 2008 TV looked better than this but I was also only 10 so what do I know.
I love Utherâs style of crown. Itâs very simple and dignified.
I truly canât imagine why people would choose to attend an execution. Like, what compels someone to go witness something like that? I know the past was boring, what with the lack of television and the illiteracy of the general population, but how do you get so bored you go watch someone get beheaded for a bogus crime like âconspiracy to use magicâ?
LMAO these effects are corny as hell actually- re: sorceress disappearing in the wind.
What a weird welcome to Camelot for Merlin.
I like how Gaius just interrogates this stranger in his house about his magical ability with no idea whatsoever who he is.
Gaius is like a million years old and he still has a better hairline than me, honestly how rude.
Loving Morganaâs willingness to tell off Uther.
Uther says Morgana wasnât around 20 years ago, how old is she supposed to be?
Traveling in the past must have been fucking terrifying. Even with guards, I canât imagine just pitching a tent in the middle of the woods on my way to wherever and sleeping peacefully. If youâre out there traveling, who knows who else might be?
Itâs so incredible how far weâve come with special affects. That sorceress melting into the singer lady mustâve been relatively impressive when this aired and now I just chuckled at it.
Arthur is such a dick and I hate it but fuck heâs so handsome.
Merlin is such a good boy to stand up to Arthur. I mean, even not knowing heâs the prince, thatâs still a pretty bold thing to do to someone who is obviously still wealthier and more powerful than you, particularly when he has a whole gaggle of idiots to support him and heâs just proven he knows his way around a weapon.
âDo you know how to walk on your knees?â âNo.â âWould you like me to help you?â âI wouldnât if I were you.â âWhy? What are you going to do to me?â âYou have no idea.â Who wrote these lines and then let them say them so remarkably homosexually? Like really, truly, who watched them act this scene and went âAh yes, this tension is exactly perfect and does not feel at all sexualâ?
Do you think Uther knows his son is a gigantic asshole? Like, do you think if he found out Arthur had Merlin thrown in jail just for calling him an ass, he would have had him freed because âwell heâs right, you knowâ? Probably not.
Gwen is so incredibly beautiful <3 And sheâs kind, too. What a lady, I love her.
Interesting, the actors are saying Guinevere, but the subtitles are saying Gwenhwyfer.
I can see how throwing food at people in the stocks would be fun, actually, especially if itâs like someone who pickpocketed you.
Choosing to keep one dragon âas an exampleâ is basically asking for someone to come free that dragon. It is immensely hubristic to assume that nothing would go wrong with that.
Ok I know that doll in âLady Helenâsâ room is kind of sketchy but especially as someone who doesnât know anything about the materials required for magic, I have no idea what prompts Merlin to start going through her stuff.
âLady Helenâsâ purple dress really does something for me. Thatâs a great cut and color, thought tbh the material looks kinda cheap.
I love Merlinâs little neck scarf thing. Maybe I should get one of them. Itâd look exceptionally queer on me.
Alright so that bit earlier with the blind man was questionable but this whole âdeaf as well as dumbâ comment really isnât necessary. I know Arthur is an asshole and also itâs 2008 so I donât really expect better, itâs just still gross. Weâve taken some big steps in the US re: LGBTQ+ folks and recently there has been a surge in the push for racial justice, I hope the next movement that gets some extra traction is disability rights. So much ableism is embedded in our language, culture, and comedy and itâs really not ok. We have a lot of work to do.
âI could take you apart with one blow.â âI could take you apart with less than that.â THIS IS VERY GAY IM SORRY IT IS JUST INCREDIBLY GAY
I have no idea where Merlin got all his audacity but I really enjoy it. Like, âHow long have you been training to be a prat, my lord?â? Thatâs gold.
âThereâs something about you, Merlin. I canât quite put my finger on it.â THIS IS ALSO QUITE GAY
Merlin is SO dramatic, how old is he supposed to be?
I mean his dramatics are a bit, uh, dramatic, but he really is just sweet and lost and scared. I canât imagine having all that power, totally effortlessly, and not having any idea why but knowing I canât use it.
Merlin sleeps in a room, but Gaius sleeps in the middle of his workshop. so, did Gaius give up his room to Merlin could have one? Thatâd be incredibly sweet.
There is a candle burning on Gaiusâ nightstand while he sleeps. Thatâs a fire hazard?Â
Why the fuck was the gate to get down to the dragon open??????Â
Iâm so distracted by the quality of these special effects. Theyâre not like truly horrible but theyâre not quite good yet either and I think itâs the inbetween state here thatâs getting me.
Merlin has this habit of entering rooms really quietly and it really seems to be how he gets himself into trouble quite often.
While I am on the Arthur/Merlin train 100%, I see and respect Gwen/Merlin shippers. Theyâre both horrendously awkward, itâs very funny.
Morganaâs dress is so hot.
âLady Helenâsâ dress is fugly
I wonder what language this song is in.
This lip synching is really bad omg
Imagine being so out of touch that you think making someone your sonâs servant is a reward. Like I get that working in the royal household is an honor or whatever but heâs still literally a servant
Ok but how is calling Arthur Merlinâs destiny NOT gay? I mean come on.Â
#merlin#merlin liveblog#tw capital punishment#Merlin S1:E1#Merlin: The Dragon's Call#TW ableist language#real life
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Together: Quentin Beck/Mysterio x Reader Pt. 4
Pt. 1 here: https://galactic-magick.tumblr.com/post/186454548951/together-quentin-beckmysterio-x-reader-pt-1
Pt. 2 here: https://galactic-magick.tumblr.com/post/186484310776/together-quentin-beckmysterio-x-reader-pt-2
Pt. 3 here:Â https://galactic-magick.tumblr.com/post/186509112376/together-quentin-beckmysterio-x-reader-pt-3
Rating: T
Words: 1000+
Warnings: Spoilers obvs, also some spice (making out) but no sex
Authorâs Notes: I feel like this is kinda cringey tbh, so please tell me what you think! Iâm honestly not sure whatâs going to happen next, Iâm thinking some more angst probably lol
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You watch as Peter has a heart-to-heart with your husband. Heâs a really sweet kid, itâs a shame you and Quentin have to pull so many tricks on him. But he has something you need, and you were so close to getting it.
Peter gives him a pair of glasses, ones engrained with Starkâs most powerful A.I. system to date. You canât even imagine how much more you could do with the drones and illusions with those. There are endless possibilities.
And now they are in your hands.
As soon as Peterâs out of sight, everyone celebrates. You run into Quentinâs arms and engulf each other in kisses. He pulls you up onto the table with him, gripping you close with his hand around you waist. He congratulates the whole team on their amazing work, reminding them how and why they got here, and the new, better lives they are fighting for.
Everyoneâs excited to work on the next illusion, one that Quentin hopes will be an Avengerâs level threat.
âYouâre amazing,â you sigh into him.
âNo, weâre amazing,â his hands grab your waist tighter, pulling you as close as possible. âWe could take over the world together if we wanted to,â you laugh.
âI donât think we need to do that,â
âMaybe not yet,â his fingers slither up your sides, and your heart starts beating faster.
âHow much time do we have?â
âWe need to have our next attack ready, and Fury wants me to meet him in Berlin soon,â he looks into your eyes, his palms now hugging your face. âBut I think we could take the night off,â he smirks.
âOh, really?â you say, your whole body getting hot.
âI mean, somehow this stupid suit needs to get ripped off of me,â
 -
 Over time, living in this new era got easier and easier. Despite half the population being gone, eventually life settled back down. You and Quentin had a small wedding and slowly got back to what brought you together in the first place. You continued working on tech with the remaining team, trying to make it as efficient as possible.
âY/N, what if we could control all this on demand?â
âWhat do you mean?â
âWhat if we didnât need to preprogram every single thing, what if our very movements could control the illusions?â you shook your head.
âQuentin, I donât think we could make something quite that advanced-â
âBut someone else could,â his eyes locked with yours.
âQuentin no, I know what youâre thinking-â he ran over to you and squeezed your shoulders.
âHoney, donât you see? We just need a little bit more to make this work to its full potential. Stark is still alive, we could steal something that could help us. Do you realize how many weapons he has? How much of his tech is controlled by itself?â
âQuentin, you know we canât do that,â
âWhy not?â
âItâs too risky, hun. We canât just steal Starkâs stuff. Everythingâs programmed to respond to him and only him, heâll find out and be onto us,â you shrugged out of his grip. âWeâve come too far to risk that,â
âYouâre right,â he groaned. âIâm sorry,â
âWe need to be careful, Quentin. The world is different now. One day, maybe weâll be able to get our hands on something like that, but not now, okay?â
âI know, I know,â he grumbled. âIâm just tired of doing nothing,â
âWeâre not doing nothing,â you returned to his embrace. âEverythingâs going to be perfect, we just need to keep going,â you could feel his frustration leaving him as you wrapped your arms around his torso and leaned into his chest. You could feel his breath and heart slow down as he pressed his lips to the top of your head.
âIâm sorry honey, I just-â
âItâs okay, itâs okay,â you cut him off. âWeâre going to be okay,â
 -
 âYou know, you actually look really nice in those glasses,â you observe once you reach the hotel room. âWho knew something that simple was all we needed?â
âIt helped that the kid was so gullible,â he laughs. You nod, a smile stretching across your lips.
âMhmm,â your hands rest on his chest.
âI love you, you know that?â
âOf course,â he feels so warm beneath your palms. âAnd I love you,â
âBrilliant,â he smirks. He slips his fingers into your hair and pulls you in for a fiery kiss. You stumble back and your body nearly goes limp, but Quentin catches you, his hand firm on your lower back. You kiss him until you literally almost pass out from not breathing.
âYou alright, honey?â he asks.
âNever better,â you grin, pushing back on him until he falls on the bed. He grabs your waist and pulls you on top of him, planting another deep kiss on your lips. Your hands grasp his shoulders and you accidentally dig your teeth in a little too hard, although he doesnât seem to mind in the slightest.
You feel the need to breathe less and less, as if heâs the only air you need. Your fingers inch to the top of his suit and you begin to unfasten it. Heâd already gotten the armor and cape off earlier, so you donât need to worry about that, but youâre careful not to take it off too roughly. He might still need it, after all.
His hands prance all over you, holding your cheeks, your arms, your hips. He doesnât stop holding you, even when youâre struggling to get his suit off. He squeezes your sides, scrunching up the fabric of your shirt.
âLetâs play a game,â he suggests. You stop and look into his eyes, confused yet intrigued. âWho can get it off first?â you laugh.
âYouâre on,â you donât hesitate, peeling down half of his suit in a single motion. You constrict your arms to your sides as much as you can, refusing to let him win. You shed off the rest of it until itâs just a blob on the floor. âI win,â you grin, raising your arms in victory. Quentin swiftly pulls your shirt over your head. âHey!â
âWhat? You already won,â
âI suppose,â you giggle, falling into him once again and drowning in his consuming, passionate embrace.
#quentin beck x reader#mysterio x reader#quentin beck#mysterio#jake gyllenhaal#far from home#ffh spoilers
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wilfred (2011) - season 1 ep1Â âhappinessâ review
ok so today were reviewing fucking "wilfred" basically its a story about a depressed guy who tried to kill himself but he failed because hes a pushover in life and even suicide is mocking him yea jk actually his sis prescribed him placebo so the meds he used in his suicide attempt were useless yada yada
then he sees his neighbours (on who he tots have the hots for) dog as a man and hes like lol wtf why is there a furry standing in my yard? im not into dogplay dudette, please dont do this to me ah-
unfortunately for him the chick, on the next day asks to take care of her dog meanwhile because idk shit happens in her house? and she has to work? yea something like that so anyway he accepts because hes into her and out of it aswell more out of it than anything tho
our man, ryan is pretty disturbed but it happens anyway he has NO control over his life so why would he have control on  a dog fursuit wearing 40 yo man? yea exactly wouldnt make sense
wilfred enters his house and smoke a damn bong thats right, a very efficient way to introduce what kind of character were up against see, jason gann has the perfect face for such character looking all dirty in that suit with a big ass black painted dog nose you gotta think "that dawgs up to no good" and youd be damn right keep reading to discover why so basically nm happens in this episode if it isnt the setting of all the shit because well ryan has a lot of issues and its gonna get worse you cant believe this dog is gonna make things better for ryan not really hes just scamming the loser with cheap tricks and drugs
btw after (trying) to vape or w/e with wilfred, the man falls asleep, wakes up because his sis whos a bitch, remember her
its important to spot whos a bitch in each show ill be reviewing its pretty easy to balance whos the antagonist and who isnt although it often is much more complexe than that which is why im here making it all very easy and very interesting, aside from lost cases like the magic school bus i cant make that shit any worse nor TOO better like i have limited power my reviews are sike but some shows are just nah back to our whipped cream: ryans depression: he is jobless ok? so his sis is mad that he doesnt make the effort to come work and do what he has to also he used to be a lawyer btw because his father wanted him to be and then his father died and he lost his job and he hated being a lawyer so w/e but he also seemingly lost all reasons to live and redacted more than one suicide letter so im not sure what to think about it he was really eager to die yknow his sis couldnt care less tho its like "yo stop ruining my image im trynna get you a job in my hospital fuckface" yea see that why shes an inconsiderate bitch
so instead of going to work because of wilfred, ryan takes him for a while btw that vermin also tries to get elijah (the actor playing ryan is elijah wood obvs btw so this series already gets 5 points to begin with i dont make the rules) to throw a tennis ball and dont forget this ball ok? its gonna come back and start a whole drama its the beginning of our adventure a ball
next theyre in a restauration thing eating chips and drinking a beer together dog and his friend then the waitress comes and
happens the tiddies eating, it almost one fucking minute im sure we could all feel the embarassement of having your animal rubbing its balls and penis against your friend whos over for the nights leg in the middle of spring and youre just trying to get it back but wow the hormones are hitting it hard its like a cleaning robot vibrating on a grandma whos cardiacs chest and you trynna take that little asshole away but for some reason its rubbed in olive oil so not only does it reeks of olive, its also slippery as heck and you can see your grandma spasmming on her soon-to-be deathbed, she has spasms for god sake no the robot no someone stop it from stimulating the old ladys torso ah shit marguerite died after drowning in her droolingÂ
not even died of an heart attack nah, it was such a messy death she suffered so much no one could do anything its like the robot was sentient yknow and well same goes for wilfred hes making it on purpose but uses the excuse : he likes the boobs it nothing personal, ryan
w/e they leave after paying (not for the side tits tho, it was a freebie for dogs) after that shit happens (i wont spoil you EVERYTHING, im just painting a pic here ok?) at this point you could wonder "is wilfred being a dick on purpose or its just about said instincts? how much percentage of his behavior is actually dog and how much is ryans mind (the guy is deranged  there is no denying that but how much? )) whats sure is that his owner likes her dog vm and hes maining that chick
good for him? but it also happens that before that, elijah just threw the ball above the gate and into his much less friendly neighbour because he was sick of the dog asking to throw it and so yea, there is a tension between ryan and wilfred not any kind of tension, exactly the kind of elija x reader fanfic i wanted to read except pov: im a canine furry and i smoke weed on a daily basis and im a jackass
theyre almost breaking up someone does something about it i was seriously getting into it wow oh no fuck look at me tearing one or two here
rip their new born bromance? or... is it all there is to it? well see no obviously its the problem we were waiting for because when our fella enters back home and idk whatever else happens its night and his sister comes home and she goes all "lol actually i gave you placebo itd be dangerous otherwise you numbfuck" but shes quickly muted once our man notices his dog friend in his yard... its time for a reunion a heart to heart conversation to proceed so he has to ditch his sis which he casually does bros before hoes
its again about the ball which HE WILL go and fetch by passing over the fence to get in neighbours yard but damn it cant be just that? wouldnt it make a lame crappy story? we need some actions, we got the tits, the beer, no job, delinquency has no limit so fuck it says the dog as he smashes the window and enters the bikers house because he SMELLS (like he smells the shit streaks you have on your pants) the weed, ryan is like "no fuck bro no shit fuck ah-" then sees the damn weed which they steal ok? hes really a pushover he has not got the right idea of stopping being one because thats what his new friends supposed to be here for yknow trynna get his loser into a winner, that lil camper gotta level up his game, go get into the business of life barging in kicking the door to enter, no shame nor hesitation were trying to make him STEP UP for HIMSELF but guess what? ill tell you later or itd be a spoil in a spoil surely a bad paradoxal medium w/e business going on blablabla theyre up to no good thats for sure as sure as how much ryans actually enjoy this the mans into this pee slash poop affair:
spoiler alert: he does it and
im just quoting him here : he never felt more alive nor glad to be so i guess thats whats life about shitting in peoples affair, stealing weed plants and quitting your job on your first day (you havent showed up tho so w/e you never really worked in that place no one knows you its all good you can get back in that place looking innocent and smiling with your broken ribs "yea nah i never had a job here and ditched yall huh" thats foxy of him kinda but not really since he had no intention back then to do anything for himself it was all strings pulled by a fucking dog hilarious really im having a kick haha no
so what next? theyre best friends? man and dog, a wonderful friendship happens he has no more family to support him but HE HAS A DOG guys he was so into it im feeling sorry for this hobot-to-be schizophrenic man
i wont spoil you but trust me when i say not to trust a furry who eats tits on your first date
in conclusion: it was a pretty decent first episode ill update my final thoughts on the first season once im done watching it but so far its recommandable the camera work is pretty cool like its not just thoughtless filming we actually have a nice feel to it, the setting of the series is esthetically pleasing you get nice colors and it aint boring, its not like a FRIENDS episode yknow? dawg i dislike how boring it looks filming wise for start but damn i aint reviewing FRIENDS rn so next, the comedy? after all its a comedy genre series not a drama, idk if id review an actual depressive show on here thatd bum the vibe out ok? i know im making all my revs awesome w/e it is that i choose to rate and comment but still im serving you a plate of my finest sheez not any fizzle in the mizzle ok?
anyway yea the humor aint bad, i havent laughed my ass of but i did find it amusing to watch the jokes may actually kick in in the second episode ill have to update this rev alright? just hang on to your balls peeps this fam will serve in due time
rating: 7,5/10 scenery/camera work 7/10 comedy 8/10 interest/entertaining points total: 7,5/10 for a first episode is fine enough to be recommanded, like a "give it a chance" sorta case yknow isnt the most hilarious show youll watch but its fine especially if youre into homoromantic tension between a furry and elijah woodÂ
jkÂ
tg, out
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